#luke doesn’t forgive easily - if not at all

[minteaspoon]

The Tides’ Captain

sad implied lucemond:(

IMPORTANT NOTE: THIS FIC INCLUDES TEEN PREGNANCY!!!! LUKE IS 15 AT THE START OF THIS FIC, SO VERY UNDERAGE!!!! DNI IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO THIS TOPIC!!!!

a/n: Luke has a son out of wedlock (it’s definitely Aemond’s), and is thus shamed and exiled by his family (with great hesitation and protest from Rhaenyra and Corlys’ side of the family, but is celebrated by the Greens)

Also, how Luke got pregnant will be up to interpretation (I personally say there’s no explanation for it, it just happened and is a complete surprise to everyone involved, which would bring potentially unhinged shenanigans and that thought is hilarious to me)

•._•._•._•._•._•

It had been six months.

Six months since Luke was found to be with child.

Six months since Luke was found out to have been bedded before marriage.

Six months since Luke had been put in front of the court and shamed.

Six months since Luke had been exiled from Westeros.

It had been six months since he’s bedded him.

The damn bastard didn’t even own up to it! But what should he have expected, with his reputation as a mutilator of kin and a bastard spawn. Tis only fair a bastard birth a bastard - at least, in the eyes of the court, and to the one he gave his maidenhood to.

The brunette even had to abandon Arrax, and was given no dragon egg to gift to his child. Something he knows the Hightowers and their allies celebrated.

Luke had sailed across the sea after hitching a ride with sailors who took pity on the poor lad. They did whatever they could to help accommodate him; fed him, sheltered him, told him stories and taught him song and dance and fishing. And in return, the exiled prince helped in whatever chores he was able.

He grew to care and love his sailor family, and they saw him as one of their own. They had even given him a new name - Prim Carlisle of the Tidefall Ship, Pearl of its crew. Luke’s little one was even given options for names by his found family; Pitt, Ervin, Arwen, Mittie, Eula, Matildah… He was leaning into naming the child either Tidus for a boy, or Joanna for a girl.

The crew had even given him his own weapon, in case he ever needed to fight alongside them - though they promise he needn’t have to, as they’d never let a pregnant fellow do heavy work, and they’ll do whatever it takes to make sure he never has to see, hear or commit any violent act. When Prim saw the dagger, he knew immediately what to name the silver blade melded into a dark hilt with small gems molded onto it - Tidal. His family laughed and teased him for such a corny name, but he stuck by it.

Before he knew it, six months had passed by, then seven, then eight and finally, he was in his last month of pregnancy. And before he knew it, he met his son; Tidus. His hair was of his mother, brown curls that framed his chubby and red face, but his eyes - they were purple.

Got something from his father, hm?

The bitter thought flew in his mind, as he smiled bitterly at his sleeping son. His birth wasn’t easy - it took Prim two days to get him out, and he had to be moved from the ship to land for proper care and assistance, as the sea is no place for anyone to give birth in. The trek to land helped in positioning Tidus correctly, so the last few moments of his birth was a success. And most importantly, Luke…Prim didn’t have to be cut open.

For a solid three months, Prim and his crew stayed on the island to rest from the chaos of birth, and the celebration of a new member of their family. After their rest, they set out yet again, this time, with even more cherished cargo with them - a child and a few girls of the island willing to come aboard and travel with Prim’s family, to help with medicine, organizing and with basic household - shiphold- chores.

Once again, Prim’s family was expanding. A few years evidently pass by, and Tidus was now three, while Prim was now eighteen. It has been three years since he last step foot on Westerosi grounds, since he had last sailed Westerosi waters, since he had last flown on Arrax in Westerosi skies. Prim was a far better sailor than he was three years prior - he was no longer seasick on deck, he knew the ropes, knew how to navigate the seas, knew how to chart and read the weather, knew how to use the stars in his predictions, and he knew how to sail and fish and hunt and lead.

When the captain of the Tidefall Ship fell to a sickness one day while they anchored on a small island, he named Prim the next captain once he hit the bucket. And when he did, his last will and command was effective immediately.

At first, Prim didn’t know if he had the ability to become captain, but with his crew’s help and his son’s encouragement, he became a feared and respected leader of a band of skilled, resourceful and “no-good” sailors under the moniker Prim Carlisle, “The Mermaid”.

It was only another three years later, when Prim and Tidus freshly turned twenty one and six respectively, did Prim decide to finally settle down somewhere cozy and quiet, where it would only be Prim and Little Tidus. When he dropped the news to his crew, they immediately went into hysterics, and immediately said they’ll settle down with him as well - though, with some prodding from Prim, they continued on their voyages, with Prim’s second in command as the new captain.

After a few weeks at sea, mapping out potential places of note good for a single parent and their child, Prim settled on a valley surrounded by wildlife and mountains and cliffs, with a meadow in the middle full of flowers with space large enough for a farm, cabin and animals.

The crew promised to come visit with gifts and trinkets and anything the father-son duo could need, and Prim held them to the promise.

Prim and Tidus lived in relative peace together in their little corner of personalized heaven. They had a cabin full of comfortable crafts by Prim and Tidus, alongside being decorated with presents from their family. They had a farm with two cows, five chickens and three sheep. They had growing crops of all kinds, as they were given many seeds by their crew to start out with. Not only that, but the girls had even given and taught him how to make the most of what little one might have during the weeks leading up to his and Tidus’ settlement.

Life was perfect for the father-son duo.

Until it wasn’t.

It wasn’t long until they hear rumors from travelers about a war brewing in Westeros, a war between family - a dance of dragons. Each side had been looking for dragon seeds to hatch and claim dragons for their side, and their reach had far extended past even the Free Cities. Prim knew better than to get involved - especially with his former family, so he made precautions to barricade both the obvious and inobvious entrances to his valley, and hid him and his child away from the skies. Only his crew knew their whereabouts, and how to get in and out.

However, these measures weren’t enough to keep him safe from someone who was desperate to get him back despite the years, and despite the fact that he never owned up to his part as Tidus’ father.

Above Prim, during a night of chill and snow, as a white and thick blanket of white coats the lands, he hears a roar that brings shivers down his spine. Clutching his crying son to his chest, who was scared for him and his mother in front of the green beast above them, in one hand while on the other, he holds his dagger - Tidal, Prim looks up and gazed past the hulking mass of flesh and scales -

And makes eye contact with a desperate, relieved and grieving violet eye.

[ma1dita]

trouble always finds me

a 'partners in crime' installment - luke castellan x dionysus!reader

words: 1.7k 

summary: (pre-established relationship) The one where he could tell you were trouble from the day he met you. Luke’s perspective on trouble & how they first met! think trouble’s origin story (Luke Castellan x fem!Dionysus!reader)

warnings: none, fluff? Mr. D being a clueless dad lol also guys they’re 14 here

a/n: welcome back to the trouble!verse hehe i was inspired by Mr. D being a bit of a jerk to Percy so that the kid doesn’t off himself. Similar concept but with Luke after he first gets to camp— another version for why trouble!reader calls him angelface coming soon

(posted 1/19/24, erm unedited and not beta’d so forgive me in advance)

—

You were always trouble, Luke knew that from the day he met you. 

Walking into Camp Half-Blood, worn out and weary after days of trying to not become harpy food, his arm was slung protectively over Annabeth’s shoulder as they were led onto the campgrounds. So many pity-filled eyes were focused on them after hearing what happened to Thalia, but the camp seemed promising, filled with other demigods who can resonate with what they’ve experienced. Luke thought it was too good to be true, but anything’s better in comparison to the streets they came from. You, however, looked at them in interest from afar, a playful expression on a pretty face watching their every move like him and Annie were shiny new toys to play with.

He was so sure something was off with you. 

Had to be, from the deranged glimmer in your eye that would appear when something bad would happen at Camp. He’d seen it in action a couple of times before you set your sights on him— setting off fireworks during capture the flag, replacing salt with sugar in the kitchens, cutting Mr. D’s hair in his sleep; all of this causing campers and staff alike to run amok and figure out who to penalize. Each time he’d find you enjoying how it all played out, excitement brimming on the cusp of revealing yourself as the culprit as he watched you bite your tongue. But as a mischievous kid himself, he wondered why you hid it. You preferred to orchestrate the show, to make a spectacle for your personal entertainment, and with a smile too soft to be considered guilty, you were a convincing actress. 

The other campers in 11 told him you’d been unclaimed for half a year now, keeping to yourself and making a safe haven within the busy cabin. You were a klutz to say the least, bringing chaos to Camp Half-Blood with a cool disposition, and you hardly seemed interested the one time Luke tried to say hi as he took the bunk next to yours. 

So why the hell wouldn’t you lay off of him?

At first it was small, shoulder bumps and raised eyebrows whenever he piped up in a conversation. That, he could deal with. Luke’s a tough guy, having gone through more than a typical 14-year old would. 

But then it just got annoying.

Glitter in his shampoo, his laundry load dyed purple, and shoelaces knotted together to make him stumble— things meant to be more of an inconvenience rather than an actual problem. Luke wasn’t sure what to make of it, or what to tell you. No one wants to be the new kid creating trouble, but you didn’t seem to have a problem with that.

Maybe you were a Hermes kid like him, but of that, Luke wasn’t so easily convinced—months of living in 11 would mean you’d learn all of the tricks of the trade, so it couldn’t automatically mean that you were related (a part of him also hoped you weren’t be half-siblings, or else the fact he couldn’t stop thinking of you would be slightly awkward). Perhaps a child of Apollo? When you weren’t being difficult, he’s seen you sprinkled in sunlight, usually humming a tune under your breath. Yesterday it was a song from the Sound of Music, and though he only remembers bits of a memory from a movie night with his mom years ago, he put his combat gear on slower just to hear you finish the song. 

Whatever you were, it was bound to be troublesome.

—

At this point in life, Luke hasn’t had many comforts while on the run. To him there’s no such thing as action without reason, without meaning.  Five years of running and not looking back makes this son of Hermes realize that he hasn’t had a chance to take a breath until he got here. It’s hard to let down your guard when you’re always supposed to be keeping watch.

He wriggles under his covers trying to relax himself before bed, purple socks sticking out of the scrappy hand-me-down blanket, and he hears a small giggle from the bed next to his. Luke shifts his weight onto his side, eyes darting to your direction in the quiet of the dark cabin.

“Nice socks.”

He blinks. Were you talking to him? His toes wiggle playfully, prompting more of your melodious laughter as he chews at his lip before he responds.

“Guess I’m getting used to them.”

“You’re getting used to a lot of things around here. That’s good,” you whisper, and thinks he can see you concocting something sinister in that brain of yours—he’s on the edge of the mattress hanging onto your every word as he realizes this is the most you’ve spoken to him.

“You did this. Why?” he says, more of a statement than a question. Why would you go out of your way for someone like him?

“Are you mad about it? Luke, right?” you mutter, a calm expression on your face shrouded in moonlight, and for a second he wonders if you actually don’t know his name until he notices the upwards quirk of your lip. 

Luke catches himself then, and the realization hits him like a blow to the chest— he’s not angry at all. If anything, he hasn’t had the time to feel anything negative with the antics you’ve been pulling. You’ve proven to be quite the distraction to his circumstances, and he can’t remember the last time he’s thought about Thalia or his mom since he got here. The melancholy falls on his countenance like a better-fitting blanket than the one he has on, and your words pull him from his thoughts before they can suffocate him again.

“Sorry about your sister. I lost someone right before I got here too. My mom.” 

This, he can tell, is not acting. Your eyes flicker to a polaroid strapped in the space underneath the top bunk above your head, two blurry figures huddled together in a memory.

“I’m sorry.” He’s not sure what to say. In the silence that follows, he swallows audibly. Everyone’s been worried about Annabeth, including himself that he hadn’t even thought of his own emotions being on display for everyone to see. Luke never thought you of all people would notice.

You shrug, “S’not your fault. I know when people are acting though. If you know I’m the one who’s been starting shit, why haven’t you told anyone?”

Luke almost laughs at that, a rough exhale leaving his lungs as he watches your hands clutch your quilt.

“It’s pretty entertaining, I guess. You’re annoying, but I don’t mind it. Kept my mind off of things.”

He watches you smile in the shadows now, and it shines—all lips, teeth, and sheer mirth that makes his chest feel a little lighter. A real smile from you, one that doesn’t hide your true intentions.

“I’m glad. Mine too.” 

The next thing you do confuses him further, but from what he’s gathered you’re always full of surprises. You chuck your quilt across the space between your bunks, and the end of it smacks him in the face as he grunts.

“Here. Keep it,” you chuckle a bit loudly, the both of you hearing a Shhhhh… from somewhere in the dark cabin.

“What… Why? Are we friends now?” Luke mumbles jokingly, inhaling the soft scent of berries and fresh linen. His purple laundry load smelled like this too.

“No.”

“Then why are you giving me your stuff?” he says, but still curls up underneath the handmade quilt stitched from memories of a past life, of motherly love and gentle hands. He doesn’t have anything like this, so he settles into this feeling of comfort instead, even if it wasn’t his memory to hold. You go quiet at the sight of him, eyes fluttering and chin tucked into the pink and purple fabric, and he looks as soft as a normal 14 year old boy should.

“It’s getting boring in here. Gonna have to change it up soon, I think,” you mumble, turning away and shutting your eyes before he can say anything else.

—

The next day, you get caught putting a month’s supply of bubble bath into the lake, but Luke’s convinced you did it on purpose. All of camp is standing on the shore, watching you wave at them from a river tube as Chiron and Mr. D yell at you in exasperation—finally revealing yourself as the troublemaker they’ve been searching for.

“Get on the beach this instant, young lady! You have no idea how much trouble you’ve put us through!” Mr. D’s voice echoes across the lake, his immortal form almost filtering through his frustration before you laugh in his face, unthreatened by the Olympian.

“Good thing I get it from you. Hello, dad!”

Jaws drop as everyone turns to look at Mr. D, the realization hitting his face as he points at you, his brain moving a mile a minute. Though you resemble your mother, your actions are all him. You revel in the grand reaction, looking up to see a purple thyrsus surrounded by grape leaves float over your head.

“Nice outfit, kid. I don’t think purple is your color. She do that to you too?” Mr. D notes Luke’s wine colored cargos and socks clashing against the harsh orange of his shirt as he pushes past him, scratching his head at the idea of another kid. Poor guy said two was the limit in a lifetime and he gets a grinning teenage girl who dares him to do something about it. He hasn’t raised a lot of girls….

“I don’t know. I guess trouble always seems to find me,” Luke laughs lightly, watching kids of all ages jump into the bubbly lake water happily. The glowing ember of his eyes are relaxed for the first time in a while— an inviting flame catching your own as you stare at him from across the sudsy water. Trouble, he thinks, a smile settling onto his face—how fitting.

He’s spent a lot of time running. But perhaps this time, he’s finding reasons to want to stay.

—

"After all, we are nothing more or less than what we choose to reveal." - Sylvia Plath

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[another-lost-mc]

Blasphemy

When you pray to him, it's not forgiveness you're asking for.

MICHAEL x gn!Reader 1.8k words | NSFW | Obsession | Sexual Themes Content Warnings: Obsessive thoughts, invasion of privacy, suggestive themes and some sexual content. A/N: Read the sequel here.

It starts when Simeon gives you the lost Ring of Light.

You think it’s a dream at first, the blinding golden-white light that overwhelms your senses. Suddenly a man’s voice, clear as if he was at your side, speaks to you and offers his blessing and good luck. The demon brothers panic later about seeing light from the Celestial Realm spill from your room, and you freeze when you realize the person you spoke to must’ve been Michael himself.

You tell yourself it’s simple curiosity that motivates you to learn more about him. The very mention of Michael’s name brings up so many varied, intense reactions depending on who you talk to. You speak to the angels first. Luke admires him wholeheartedly, but Simeon’s forced smile and carefully guarded answers to the questions you ask make you feel guilty.

It’s more complicated talking to the demons about him. Sometimes, they say his name with cloudy expressions and pursed lips like they just bit into something sour. Other times, they look far-away and try not to smile when they reminisce about events that happened long ago.

Mammon complains to you about Michael’s no-nonsense approach to work and discipline, and Asmodeus tells you some abstract memory about Michael while he paints your nails. He sounds nostalgic when he mentions all the ways Lucifer and Michael are similar, and the ways they’re also completely different.

Lucifer doesn’t talk about Michael very much, but he’ll usually answer your questions so long as they’re vague and not too prying. When he speaks about Michael, he wears the frown of someone that remembers hurting and being hurt by someone he loved, but it was so long ago the pain is a dull throb he can ignore.

No matter what the angels or demons tell you, you can't shake your interest in the archangel that is admired and feared in equal measure. Curiosity turns to fascination, and you feel some ravenous need to learn more. The things you’ve learned about him so far - the awe-inspiring feats, the high expectations he puts on those serving him, the cruel punishments for those who fail him - scare you and captivate you.

You spend more time with Luke who shares his memories of Michael so easily. It’s no wonder Luke enjoys baking so much - he tells you about Michael’s sweet tooth, the things Michael particularly likes to eat and drink the most, and Luke even offers to make some Celestial Realm desserts for you to try. When you eat them, you pretend it brings you closer to him, like you share something in common.

One day when you visit Luke at Purgatory Hall, he casually mentions getting a message from Michael and you nearly choke on your tea. He keeps talking about whatever task he’s been assigned, but your mind is racing. How did you not think of this sooner?

“I forgot my D.D.D. at the House of Lamentation, can I borrow yours?” The lie rolls off your tongue easily and Luke eagerly hands you his device without a second thought. When he runs off to the kitchen to check on lunch, you immediately pull up his chat history with Michael. You don’t have time to read everything properly, so you take as many screenshots of their conversations as you can, and you send them to yourself. When you’re finished, you close the chat app and head to the kitchen to help Luke.

Later that evening, you read and re-read the message history between Luke and Michael. You smile when you read about Luke’s versions of events in the Devildom, often skewed to make the demons look worse than they (usually) are. You’re touched by the way Michael seems to genuinely care for the young angel too. He responds to Luke’s messages with enthusiastic encouragement or gentle reminders to show his demon hosts grace and patience. 

Your eyes widen comically when you come across your name during one of their older conversations, and you feel your cheeks grow warm when you realize they were talking about you.

Luke: They’re so nice! They told me about some human world desserts that sound amazing. I’m going to ask them to teach me one day, if I can get the ingredients.

Michael: They sound like a wonderful friend to you.

Luke: I wish you could meet them!

Michael: Perhaps one day I will.

Those seemingly innocent words shouldn’t have this sort of impact on you. The logical part of your mind knows Michael is probably humoring Luke, grateful that he’s found a friend in the Devildom and happy to see that you’re a positive influence on him. The desperate part of your mind, the one that fixates on those words, reads them almost like a promise. One day you'll be able to see him in person, or perhaps even touch him if you’re brave enough. 

Their conversation lingers in your mind for the next several days, and you can't stop fantasizing about what meeting Michael might be like. The first meetings that you dream about skirt the line of innocent curiosity and unashamed blasphemy. One morning you wake up with your hand between your legs and the name of a faceless angel on your lips when you come. The memory of his voice rings in your ears and you still want more. You’re not sure what it says about you that you don’t feel ashamed at all.

You grow bored of re-reading the same juvenile conversations between Luke and Michael, and you turn your sights to accessing Simeon’s D.D.D. next. Simeon is older than Luke and you know his relationship with Michael is more complicated. You’re not sure if it’ll be as easy to get access to his phone, but fate is on your side.

The next time you visit Purgatory Hall, Simeon comes to see you and Luke in the kitchen. He looks a bit embarrassed and he’s scratching the back of his head while he holds his phone out to you.

“If you’re not busy, do you mind helping me with this?” he asks you a bit sheepishly.

You have to remind yourself not to be too eager when he hands over his device. “Of course! It’s not a problem at all. If you want to finish helping Luke, I can see what the problem is.”

You leave the two angels in the kitchen and retreat to the living room. The problem is obvious - the screen lighting is so dim it’s hard to read, and somehow Simeon changed the default language to some sort of demonic script neither of you understand. They’re both easy things to fix, and that leaves you with a few spare minutes to check his message history.

As you suspected, his conversations with Michael are more mature. They’re less focused on the daily sights that Luke is amazed by, focusing instead on Devildom life and politics. Michael is curious about Diavolo and his fallen brothers most of all. He asks pointed questions and makes subtle comments that seem purposeful if you read between the lines.

One of the more recent conversations he and Simeon had seems serious. You had no idea that Simeon stole the ring he gave you. It’s always difficult to read tone through words alone, but even you can decipher the undercurrent of disappointment and anger in Michael’s messages.

You understand now, with more clarity than ever, that Michael is intelligent, cunning, and should not be crossed. This realization should frighten you and put a quick end to your silly little crush. However, the temptation of forbidden fruit is too much for you to resist, and this knowledge fuels your fascination instead.

When you’re alone in bed at night, you give up all pretenses and surrender to lustful urges. Your thoughts of the mysterious archangel are steeped in lust. You remember the rumbling sound of his voice in your mind, and you can still feel the warmth of the Celestial Realm’s light. If he were to put his hands on you, would he feel that warm too?

It’s so easy to give into the fantasy that it’s his hands moving between your thighs while you touch yourself. You imagine returning to the Celestial Realm and finally meeting him in-person. You picture him towering over you, the embodiment of grace and power and absolute authority. You wonder what you might have to say or do to tempt him.

Thoughts of him - dark, depraved, delightfully sinful thoughts - are enough to push you over the edge while you stroke yourself beneath your sheets. You come once, then again not long after, riding the high of sin and corruption. You try to stop the whimpers and moans that threaten to spill from your lips. Breathy whispers that sound suspiciously like his name break the silence of your room, hushed secrets for your ears alone.

You’re still panting lightly, mind foggy from the pleasurable daze of your last orgasm, when your D.D.D. vibrates on the nightstand next to your bed. It’s an automatic response when you reach for it - with your clean hand, the one that isn’t saturated by the scent of your arousal - and mumble a quiet greeting when you answer. It wouldn’t be the first time one of the demon brothers got himself locked out of the house after partying all night.

“Did you think I would ignore your filthy prayers forever?” the smooth voice on the other line asks you.

Michael. You recognize who it is instantly and sit up in bed.

“Wait, how did you—?” you ask nervously, because how the hell did he get your number?

“You’re not the only one Luke trusts with his belongings,” Michael says knowingly, with a hint of amusement.

Oh no. Has he been watching you this whole time, waiting for your most vulnerable moment to surprise you like this? What does he know? What has he seen, or heard?

You’re completely unprepared for this conversation because he's rendered you speechless. Your mouth opens and closes uselessly while you try to think of something to say. What can you say? You’re excited and embarrassed, and your body warms up suddenly, like it’s on fire. 

He chuckles quietly, like he predicted this reaction from you. Your silence speaks volumes, and you realize you don’t need to say a word for him to understand you perfectly.

“Humans are such fascinating creatures,” Michael’s voice drawls, low and intimate in your ear.

You whimper and try to clamp a hand over your mouth to muffle the noise, but it's too late. He chuckles again and he sounds far too pleased with himself. "You were intriguing before, but not many are able to surprise me the way that you have. Perhaps you deserve a reward for your efforts.”

You can’t help but shudder from the lust simmering deep within your belly. Is he trying to sound seductive on purpose? You don’t know and it’s impossible to tell.

It seems like he can read your thoughts because he hums approvingly. “Yes, I think a proper meeting is in order, don’t you agree?”

He doesn’t wait for your answer, and before you can attempt to speak again, the line goes dead.

[peachhcs]

THE NEW BREAKUP TIMELINE!!

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)

after some consideration, i'm changing the breakup timeline for our lovely friends samy and will!!! wooohooo!! (because let's be real, could i really drag it out that long? no.) i've bulleted everything that's changed, so take a read and see what's new!! i will be writing bigger fics for the major points so don't worry, but if there's any bullets you want expanded into a fic or blurb, let me know!!

i will still keep the previous breakup timeline fics up, we'll just pretend some of it doesn't exist and it's like a parellel universe to the au lmao. the charm bracelet still does exist btw!! but yay!! enjoy new samy and will timeline!! i just love them so much i couldn't drag it out more, so i changed it up!! also yes will's new post may have influenced this decision as well :))

au masterlist

will breaks up with samy a few days after they get back from worlds (end of May) 

will signs with the san jose sharks (end of May) 

samy and will don’t speak for the month of June (the longest they’ve gone without talking)

will goes to the bauer combine where he talks to this girl in hopes of getting his mind off samy, but it doesn’t work because when he makes a joke that the girl doesn’t laugh at because only samy gets, will realizes it’s all wrong and he shouldn’t have broken up with her 

this highkey makes him spiral hard because he realizes how big of a mistake he made 

he panic calls gabe and ryan in hopes that they’ll tell him what to do 

gabe and ryan tell him that he needs to talk to her!! 

will’s scared to reach back out because what if samy doesn’t want to talk to him (rightfully so)  

he goes back home for a bit where he confides in grace and his mom (for once!!) 

they tell him that he should reach out if he wants it’s really up to him, but he needs to realize he lost all of samy’s trust because of what he did and said, so she may not warm up to him as quickly or easily 

meanwhile, samy sees all the content of will at the combine which makes her happy and sad at the same time 

happy because he’s experiencing all these things and meeting so many new people, but sad because she misses him and wishes they worked something out between them or at least talked more before will made that decision

she doesn’t reach out though. too scared and not wanting to distract him from working on all his media things 

another week passes and now it’s july which means the smith + hughes family vacation is coming up!! 

(i said will would skip out on this, but i’m changing it so he does end up showing up) it’s the first time they’ve seen one another since the breakup so two months 

they’re kind of awkward and avoid each other at first because they’re only really there because their parents forced them to be 

samy hangs around on the deck or anywhere away from the boys because she knows wherever her brothers are, will is there 

(jack, quinn, and luke are like lowkey still pissed at will, but they cool off a bit when they talk to him about it more and see that he really regrets it and wants to get back together) 

on the third day, samy and will can’t keep avoiding each other. they’re the only ones awake one night after a long day going out and about with everyone 

will approaches samy first when he finds her down on the dock just sitting by herself 

they talk some awkward small talk before getting into the meat of everything 

in short, will admits he messed up, he was just scared of the distance and not being good enough for her because he’s gonna be so far away once summer’s over and he doesn’t want to hold her back from anything 

samy half forgives him, but tells him she wishes he talked to her more. basically, will’s going to have to work to get her trust back and he definitely knows that, so they decide to start back as friends before jumping into anything

after that talk, the rest of the vacation is less awkward and they slowly warm back up to one another which the parents are happy to see 

the smiths go back to boston after the vacation, so samy and will don’t see one another again until the end of july/beginning of august when will’s move out is coming up  

they still talk a bit over text though 

(the farewell party is a bit different now and will knows they’re coming instead of finding out the morning before and they talk at the party again. another mini reunion again) 

samy talks with gabe and ryan privately later that day about her and will. 

once the party’s over, samy and her family and the guys stay back for a bit and they all just hang out like old times

later that night, will gets samy alone again. they make cute little small talk which leads to will asking samy to fly out to california with him to help him move in like they always talked about 

she agrees and so they’re all flying out that next week  

they spend that whole weekend decorating will’s apartment and making it “him” 

the day before samy flies back home to start her own pre season camps for soccer, will takes a chance and takes samy out on a date 

it’s like they never even broke up in the first place on that date 

by the end of the night, will asks samy if they could try again and he promises he won’t fuck it all up again 

samy agrees and they get back together with the promise that the distance doesn’t matter no matter what happens!! 

[lya-dustin]

Shock and Delight

Chapter 15

Cw: medieval-ish reasonings of aromanticism and asexuality(technically demisexuality and demiromanticism because this is a romance fic), nudity, bad puns.

It troubles him how easily they fool everyone here.

Even the Morning Scandal was completely fooled by them, and no one could get away with that these days. That woman, whoever she was, knew everything except one thing.

He enjoys her company, the way she confides and treats him as if he were as dear to her as her infernal siblings. Friendship is easy with her; he knows her since they were babes, and she knows him as good as his own sister.

“That is not fair! How come you get your book first?” Aemma playfully took his hand after his manservant brought him the wooden box containing the first published edition of Archmaester Fomas’ The Lies of the Ancients.

“Because mine comes with an apology from your brother.” He skims through the heartfelt letter the prince then puts away for later. Aemond had not been expecting that, he will need someone unbiased to make sense of it.

While he has overcome the loss of his eye at Luke’s hand, he is not sure he is ready to forgive him for it, even if it was a terrible accident.

Aemma would tell him to forgive because she was also there and knows he did not want nor mean to do it anymore than Aemond wanted to hurt everyone that night while his mother would tell him the brat doesn’t mean it and it’s a ploy to weaken him.

Sylvi was completely unbiased about it and would allow him a moment of peace away from his family.

Away from Aemma who he has become too fond of as of late.

He had never been comfortable with showing any sort of affection with anyone save maybe his mother and sister and this morning, Aemond had leaned against her as they sat under tree and used the excuse of a few stray curls to touch her face.

The prince has no idea what gave him the impulse to do that, nor why he is looking forward to be in her company again. He thinks of her too often these days, of what she her opinion would be, or how she would laugh with him instead of at him.

Even worse, Aemma is prone to affection, and Aemond has no clue as to when he begun to crave it.

Like now that he told her of the book knowing she is dying to read it and how he will let her borrow it even if he’s said he wouldn’t. Because she would, squeeze his hands, hug him in gratitude or even kiss his cheek like she does with her brother and Aemond has no idea why he wants that.

He had attributed his desire to have her in his company alone to his selfishness, but now that they are alone in his room, he knows its not that.

They are friends, confidants, kin. They are not sweethearts, no matter how good they are at pretending they are.

He couldn’t be falling for her. It was impossible and she was meant for someone else, always someone else.

Aemond couldn’t be falling in love with her because he is incapable of it.

Now that the Queen has apologized for sending Lyonel her way, Aemma has a lot more freedom to do as she please.

Aemma only accepts it to be polite and puts the matter behind her. The queen is vying for her mother’s inheritance after all and there was that whole unpleasantness during her childhood because the king neglected his family and Alicent took it out on her when she could.

Still, it is nice to have access to the family library at any time she wants, and no interference in her and Aemond’s scheme. So far it has not gone well, the prospects have not managed to inspire anything in her save some inside jokes between her and Aemond at yesterday's ball.

Like at night when she can’t sleep and the narrow tunnel in the parlor leads here. There were not many new books here, well, ones that pique her interest. There were a lot of religious texts, very explicit pornography hidden in Aegon’s copy of the Seven-Pointed Star and some novels older than her. Everyone had their own books in their own bookshelves, for their privacy as one should.

She’d kill for her novel half-finished and forgotten at home.

Maybe she could borrow a book from him, his chambers were just on the other side of the library. The tunnel she came through led to his antechamber if she remembers from all those times they would sneak in and out of his rooms when they were little.

Aemond had gotten a copy of Lies of the Ancients this morning, since he is out tonight, he will not notice if she borrowed it and gets to sate her curiosity before hers arrives in a moon or so.

The Pearl of Dragonstone thinks she has been successful in her quest only to find the book’s owner wearing his leather coat cinched by his sword belt like a dressing gown. He had not noticed her in the antechamber, if he had he wouldn’t have removed his belt and tossed the leather coat onto a chair.

“Stealing books now, Aemee, what would Teora say?” He acts as if he weren’t caught in definitely stranger circumstances.

They were kin, no one would think it strange she would be here unchaperoned to borrow a book when she lives down the hall, but what was strange was Aemond sans eyepatch…and sans clothes?

“Why are you naked?” Aemma asks, trying her best not to look. She had gasped and turned around while shutting her eyes from the sight of a very naked Aemond, but the curiosity of getting a second glance at his chiseled body was putting quite the fight.

“I left my clothes at the brothel.” He answered vaguely and hurried to dress himself in his sleeping garments as quickly as he could. “You are welcome to look, Aemma, everyone there already saw me in all my naked glory. You may as well see why I am the most sought-after bachelor at Court.”

He must be quite the sight if he is bragging about his looks to her of all people.

“No thank you. I should leave.” If only he wasn’t near the door. And because she is trapped here until he has left the stairs that lead to the library, she asks, “Did you walk here with bare feet?”

“Only you would not ask why you are leaving a brothel naked, or why are you at a brothel in the first place.” He snorts at the strange question, because of course she would ask about that.

Ever since she saw greyscale on the foot of a servant, she’s dreaded ever walking without the right footwear. Especially in Kingslanding where everything is just so filthy. They had amputated the servant’s foot; the disease would’ve killed them all and spread its plague to everyone if they had not. Aemond knows of her fear of getting a disease like that, and the asshole loves to mock her for it as if greyscale had a cure.

“You wouldn’t answer them anyways, Aemond. Anyways, are you dressed so I may leave?” she makes no mention of the book in her hands. His teasing demands he lets her read the damn book.

“You are not leaving with my book. It is not so difficult to wait a month, little queen.” He answers her question by sneaking up behind her and making her jump when he suddenly speaks. The One-Eye fails to reclaim his book and the princess takes a mad dash out of there with a stifled laugh.

They could get into so much trouble, but it’s been a long time since she has had this sort of fun.

“But it’s terribly difficult for a man to wait until marriage given you sought out a whore. What was the name of the fine establishment you left your clothes in, dear uncle?” She doesn’t mean to say that, or at least sound like it bothered her while returning fire.

They are only friends. Just friends fooling everyone into believing they are courting. Nothing more.

Still, he rolled his eye as he settled on the longer of the couches in the library. “You can read my copy as long as you do it here, right now.”

“You will regret it.” The princess sits across from him so he can’t see where she is in her reading. It is a good deal… for her. Aemond will regret it at once, Aemma could annoy even the most patient of people with her incessant questions. “So, what made you run out of there bare as a buck?”

“Don’t push your luck, sweet niece.” He sighed knowing there was no escape. Besides from what she’s gathered Aemond doesn’t have any friends. He must be so lonely here. “Aegon happened to come with his lickspittles, tried to humiliate me and I left before the milk of the poppy made me forget I am not to use my fists to resolve all my issues.”

Aemond had earned a reputation after the Morning wrote how he beat Lyonel for her in Helaena’s drawing room. He is the gallant hero with perfect looks and a good strong fist.

Their false courtship was working like a dream. The queen was now trying her best to gently guide the more exemplary men at court her way to keep Aemond from her.

There was a raven from Dorne even, seeking to thank the Realm for some act of bravery from Daemon and his men by having Prince Qyle present it himself.

A match with Dorne would keep the peace between the Marcher lords of the Stormlands and the Reach with Dorne. Even if Qyle’s sister, Aliandra, was the heir, he brought the two Ps Viserys was known for: peace and prosperity.

But until Aemma finds a good husband, she and Aemond must play two youths in love.

“Gods, that’s terrible!” she cannot help her response and he nods in agreement. “I thought Helaena said he was past such horridness?”

“He reverts to that when things don’t go right, like how my mother used to put you down when father ignored us and made you diamond knowing no suitor would come because she feels threatened by your presence.” The prince explains things as if he were talking about the behavior of a pet and not the shitty things his brother and mother did to them. “It’s simply their nature.”

“Again, that’s terrible.” The princess reiterates and her companion shrugs it off. To him its something that occurs often and cannot be fixed, to her its something that needs to be fixed.

“I don’t want your pity anymore that you would like mine, Aemee.” He refuses to even look at her expecting pity.

“It’s not pity, you do have my sympathies, I know how awful it feels to be the target of something you never asked for. As you said, your mother and your brother are prone to taking out their insecurities on us and it won’t end until they decide to grow up.” Aemma left the chair and used the book as an excuse to sit with him. She wasn’t going to remember anything she read on it, not that she read much of the first chapter anyways. “But enough about them, well, him. You get to leave the coop and do as you please, what fine establishment did Aegon follow you to?”

She doesn’t really care to know, but her question has him snort and even for a moment forget his troubles.

“It’s not appropriate for a lady, let alone a princess to know.” He tries to dissuade her from needling him about it but gives in when she reminds him that she is also his friend and kinswoman who lives with Daemon and the boys.

Even in the dark the princess can tell he is embarrassed, if she could touch his face, she would find his cheeks warm.

“The Cock Inn, despite the name it is rather---”

“Eggs-cellent.” She finishes the sentence for him making her friend break out in silent laughter.

“Fuck you.”Aemond has a nice laugh, hardly does it and perhaps that is why the princess takes it upon herself to make him laugh even if they would be fucked if they were to be caught here by the wrong people.

“You are terrible, Aemma. I should have known you would mock a woman’s most prized possession.” He is smiling as he playfully chastises her for her stupid pun.

“Someone has to make you laugh, Aemond. Until I marry and leave, I shall take on that responsibility even if you forbid me.”

If only Aemma could have this easy companionship with her suitors. After that moment days ago when she suddenly felt attracted to him under the tree and hoped to replicate it with the other young men, she’s come to fear it will never happen again.

“I shall have my revenge at your next ball, mark my words, sweet niece.”

If Aemma didn’t know any better she’d think there was something there. Something he feels too, she’s sure of it.

[takadasaiko]

“Rise, my boy. I trust the medical staff has taken good care of you.”

“Yes, my emperor,” he answered easily, pulling a chuckle from the old husk of a Sith as Luke straightened.

“Your father too holds little regard for them.” Interesting. Palpatine wanted him to know that he knew how little the younger Skywalker thought of Coruscant’s best. But did he know that Luke had slipped out and where he'd been? Force knew there were layers to every word he uttered. It kept people guessing as to just how far his visions took him, just how much he Saw, and if they could truly get something past him. Just because he hadn’t been hauled out for the first public execution didn’t mean that he was in the clear. Or Mara. Or his father.

“I fear I don’t have the patience for medical staff in general,” Luke answered and that seemed to amuse his father’s master.

“Or for protocol.”

Luke found gold eyes focused on him and he felt his father touch his mind over their bond, looking for what this might all be about.

Palpatine’s focus remained solely on Luke though. “Did you not think I would discover that you have been making moves to undermine Grand Moff Tarkin?”

There it was. He had two choices: grovel and beg for forgiveness or stand firmly by his decision, protocol be damned. Not that anyone in his position would have been fool enough to choose the former. Luke squared his shoulders and tilted his chin a little higher. “Tarkin’s own hubris was delaying your weapon, my emperor.” Palpatine motioned for him to continue as he studied him intently. Any word could land him in an early grave and everyone in the room knew it. “He wants the credit for a project that he doesn’t have the technical knowledge to scrape the surface of what’s been created. Krennec knows that, and knows that once the project is done that Tarkin would toss him away for the glory.”

“But not you?”

Luke shrugged as nonchalantly as he could manage. “I convinced him that I see his worth. He’ll complete the weapon with confidence that he’ll receive assignments following its completion.”

“And if he does not?”

“The decision is ultimately yours, my emperor. My intention was simply to move a project that Tarkin had stalled forward.”

Palpatine flashed a smile of rotten teeth and nodded. “Good. Very good,” he offered. “Come closer, Natus. Lord Vader.”

The two men moved closer and Luke caught Mara’s gaze very briefly. She didn’t seem to have anymore insight than he did.

One thin, bony hand reached out and a Red Guard approached, setting a device down for all to see. As the robed figure moved away, Palpatine’s fingers twitched and the device whirled, an image leaping up from it to show the bridge of the Death Star. Tarkin stood waiting, Krennec sulking behind him, but it was the scientist that the Emperor spoke to. “Director Krennec, Lord Natus speaks very highly of the weapon you have built for me. Are you prepared to prove its worth?”

A startled expression was shared by both the Moff and Science Director, but the latter stepped forward, bending in reverence as he spoke. “At your command, my Emperor,” he answered, his voice trembling ever so slightly.

“You may fire when ready.”

[unohanabbygirl]

Knowing the deep affection and love Daemon, Corlys, Laenor, Harwin have of Luke. Will Aemond ever be able to get their blessing if Aemond ever were to come to them and ask for Luke's hand. I can see maybe Harwin and Laenor relenting, but I feel that Daemon and Corlys are Luke's real surrogate fathers and I feel like they wouldn't accept Aemond ever. Could this possibly cause some strain in their relationship with Luke?

Out of all four men Aemond’s best chances at gaining any sort of green light when it comes down to his relationship with Luke is going to either Harwin or Laenor. This for a few reasons, most of them having to do with both men only having been alive to remember Aemond as the shy, insecure boy who their son enjoyed reading stories with rather than the nearly grown kinslayer.

What they also saw was his current life remorse, the need for forgiveness and nearly constant night terrors. Laenor and Harwin know Aemond’s guilt, whereas Daemon and Corlys remember his cruelty and the seemingly prideful stance on taking Luke’s life. Because of this Daemon and Corlys are a completely different story in terms of being accepting. Any chance of Aemond gaining an explicit blessing from those two are slim to none. It’s a flat out no and it’s always going to be that way. However, Luke’s going to do what he wants and what he wants is Aemond, with or without a ��blessing’.

The dynamic is similar to that one mother in law who doesn’t even try to hide any disapproval of her beloved sons new wife. She’s nauseatingly passive aggressive, throws constant jabs no matter how great of a spouse the daughter-in-law is, and is constantly pushing her son to find someone else: yet the son just ignores mom and goes on about his day. Will this annoy Aemond? Yes, but it’s something he’ll have to put up with for as long as they’re together and Luke knows it despite Aemond’s attempts at proving himself worthy.

Could it put a strain on their relationship? Absolutely, self-doubt and even a bit of self-pity would drive Aemond into eventually pushing Luke away as he takes Daemon’s insistence he’ll only end up hurting Luke to heart. After all, if you aren’t fully secure in yourself romantic relationships can easily fall apart. Meanwhile Luke would get frustrated by all involved parties as he’s has more than his fair share of others deciding things for him.

But this is only the outcome if Aemond ignores Luke assurances that outside approval dosen’t matter and just keeps on trying. In this case it can go either way tbh.

[websterss]

DEAD BY POPULAR DEMAND (3)  — LUKE PATTERSON

SUMMARY: Having had enough of dealing with Caleb you take the opportunity to leave the Hollywood Club.

WARNING(S): Angst, mentions of dying, fluff

WORD COUNT: 2,598

PAIRING: Luke Patterson x Ghost-fem!Reader

A/N: Hope you enjoy it! ♡ Feedback is always welcomed!

MASTERLIST

PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3

They say life flashes before your eyes, to never take anything for granted, and you didn’t. “Ya know, I didn’t take you for the type to use dead corpses as leverage. But then again everything so far has been total bullshit with you!” You sniffled getting off the floor. You stood before him as you spared a glance down at yourself. You looked all gray and on the verge of decomposing. 

“Now, now, no need to be rude.”

“You killed me, we are so far from pleasantries.” You scowled at him. “I’m already dead. What more do you want?”

“I need the boys.” You shook your head not understanding him. “They’re too powerful. I can’t have them roaming California with their newly found tricks.” Caleb smirked.

“See the thing with that is…” You gestured to the room. “They’re already gone…so what’s your big plan now?” You purse your lips in question.

“Simple, ruin everything and everyone they love.”

“Mhmm.” You pondered the supposedly evil scheme of his. “Yeah, I hear you, but uh, when do we get to the part where that plan is actually going accordingly?”

“Well, with you obviously.” Caleb gestured to all of you.

“Trust me, you’d only be hurting one person in this case and she doesn’t forgive very easily. So killing me wasn’t very smart…which was for what exactly? Your own joy?” You raised an eyebrow.

“You knew too much, and you could see me. Which I was intrigued by.” He titled his head scanning you up and down.

“I can still see you now too.” You let your arms fall to their sides. “And there isn’t much to see anyways.”

“Rude.” Caleb scoffed.

“Just let me go. I’m no good to you.” You clenched your jaw.

“But see, that’s where you’re wrong my dove…” You eyed him suspiciously. “You’re the perfect leverage.”

“Again, how?” You looked at him confused. He was about to speak up again, but you put your hand out to stop him. “How about I just stop you there, and kick your ass now, and get this over with?”

“You won’t win.” Caleb checked his manicure.

“But see, that’s where you’re wrong, Mr. Covington. I don’t give up easily.” 

-

After the final bow the guys poofed back into the studio. Luke grew concerned when you didn’t poof back with them. He guessed it was Caleb, but since they were crossing over and possibly destroyed, he stayed put. He groaned as another jolt hit him in the gut. Alex and Reggie reciprocating the pain that was felt.

They all laid back on the rug waiting for their time to be up. “D-Do you think Y/n’s okay?” Alex said out of the blue.

“It’s Y/n…she’s always got everything under control.” Reggie jokes, but groaned feeling another jolt hit them.

“If C-Caleb does anything to her, I’ll kill him.” Luke coughed holding his stomach. “Maybe…if he doesn’t kill us first.”

“I-I think we should worry about Y/n doing something to him.” Alex closed his eyes, the pain being too much.

-

You grunted as you raised a chair close to you, slamming it into Caleb and his stupid cape outfit. What the fuck was he even wearing? He fell with a grunt and covered his face.

“You fucking asshole that’s for killing me!” You screamed as you kept beating the chair into him. 

-

It didn’t take long before Julie had found them on the ground. She was upset because she really thought that they were gone for good. To make things hurt more, you hadn’t shown up to the show. Julie didn’t get a call, nor a text telling her that you couldn’t make it. Her calls weren’t going through either and that worried her more than anything. She just wanted you to be there and she wanted the guys back, so imagine her shock when they were on the ground of the garage in pain.

“Guys? What? Why are you here? I-I thought-” Julie was cut off by the sudden jolt that struck the boys. She gripped at her chest feeling her breathing pick up. Reggie held onto Alex and Luke’s hands as they groaned out in pain. “I-I thought you crossed over. Why didn’t you cross over?”

“I guess playing at the Orpheum…” Alex struggled to stand. “Wasn’t our unfinished business.” 

“Point, Caleb.” Reggie scowled, sarcastically.

“We wanted you to think we crossed over…so we pretended to.” Luke glanced up at Julie. “We just…” He shook his head. “W-We had nowhere else to go.” Luke’s breathing was labored. He held his side from where the jolts shocked him.

“We thought you’d go straight to bed.” Reggie shrugged, looking at Julie.

“Yeah well.” Alex sighed heavily, leaning against the piano. “I knew she was gonna come out here, but nobody ever listens to-” Another jolt struck them. This one was stronger. All three doubled over in pain. Luke fell on his side finding comfort on the carpet, Reggie felt his body fail him causing him to lose his grip on the couch, and Alex… Alex had almost fallen to his knees before he barely held himself up by the piano.

Julie rushed forward and pleaded. “You have to save yourself right now! Go join Caleb’s club, please! It’s better than not existing at all, please! Poof out, do something please! Do it for me, please!” Julie cried out.

“We’re not going back there.” Reggie denied her pleas.

“No music is worth making Julie, if we’re not making it with you.” Julie tilted her head, pouting as her eyes glossed over. “No regrets.” Luke admitted. She lurched herself forward and wrapped her arms around him. Luke wrapped his arms around her too when she went in for a hug. Reggie smiled and Alex was confused.

“I love you guys.” Julie sniffled.

Julie then suddenly pulled back realizing she could feel Luke. He too was taken back because she was able to touch him. She ran her hands down his arms then to his hands. “How can I feel you?”

“I-I don’t know.”

Julie gasped as she placed her hands on his face. Luke then cupped her face too. Laughing because he couldn’t believe it. This was some sort of miracle.

He turned around to look at you guys. “I feel stronger.”

“Alex, Reggie, come here.” Julie told them. The guys walked up to Julie and wrapped their arms around each other. Halo circles glowed up into the air above.

“Woah, I-I don’t feel as weak anymore.” Reggie smiled.

“Yeah me neither. Not that I was ever that weak.” Alex joked, causing them all to laugh. The guys then all looked down at their wrist. The purple stamps removed themselves from their wrist and flowed up into the air.

“What do you think that means?” Julie gaped at the purple magic that floated above her. “I think the band is back.” Luke smiled.

“You guys think we could try that hug one more time?” Alex asked, they laughed and huddled together embracing each other with their hands.

“I like this!” Reggie admitted.

“Me too!” Julie exclaimed. “We played the Orpheum, woo!” They all jumped up and down together.

-

It hadn’t been long till you took a seat back on the ground. Your back pressed against the wall behind you. Your eyes staring straight ahead into nothing. Nothing. That’s all you felt inside. Nothingness slathered with a pinch of numbness. A disaster for your mental health. The room was quiet except for Caleb’s labored breathing. The man was trying his best to get into a sitting position. You had spared him a glance when he groaned in satisfaction. You didn’t think it was possible for a ghost to receive bruises or cuts. Though you assumed so, since purple was starting to form around his right eye. You looked down at your hands. A little bruised themselves and a nail or two were chipped in the process, but it wasn’t the end of the world. Beating the shit out of Caleb didn’t make you whole. It didn’t heal the ache in your nonexistent beating heart. The emptiness remained.

“S-Satisfied?”

“Nope.” You stared off into space. 

“Oh.” Caleb’s voice rose an octave.

“I’m leaving, Caleb.” You pushed yourself up. “Don’t try and stop me.”

“She’s all yours.” He hummed. Gesturing out his hand to your body. He closed his eyes as he held his stomach.

“I hate you.” Your lip quivered. Your eyes staring down at the man who took everything from you. “But I know you don’t care and continuing on, telling you how much I despise your guts, isn’t gonna help me. So I’m gonna go.” You nodded. “And you’re gonna keep sitting there, with your ego a little bruised.” You turned to wrap your arms around your corpse. Wanting to take your body somewhere where you were sure they’d find it. Where’d they find you.

“I can see why Luke likes you.” You tensed hearing him talk. “You hold a fire inside you like no one else does. I bet that drew him in too. I guess he got lucky with someone who balances him out perfectly. You pull, he pushes. You ignite, he extinguishes. A rare, but beautiful match. At least now you can really be with him.”

“Goodbye, Caleb.” With that you poofed you and your body out of the Hollywood Ghost Club. 

-

You didn’t think twice when you reappeared inside the garage. Your knees hit the ground hard. You had attempted to steady your own body in your arms but ended up toppling over. The guys had turned around when they saw you. They were shocked and filled with joy upon seeing you again.

“Y/n?” Reggie had to do a double take because seeing you there in the garage seemed too good to be true.

“Oh my god, you’re back!” Alex got up rushing over to you. “Oh god, we need to get Julie.” 

“Y/n, you’ll never gonna believe what just happened!” Luke walked up to you with a bounce in his step. The boys just discovered that Julie’s love for them made them able to be physically touched. “Julie she-” He smiled then immediately frowned. Tears grazed your eyes as you struggled to hold your dead body up in your arms. Luke reacted quickly running up to you to help you put yourself down.

“I-I didn’t know where else to go...” You whimpered, you placed a hand on your head looking anywhere, everywhere, feeling lost and out of hope.

Alex stopped finally taking a good look at you, seeing one of your straps falling off your shoulder, your hair disheveled, and the bottom skirt of your dress slightly ripped.

You looked like you’d been through hell and back.

“Caleb’s tough but he isn’t as tough as me…” You half-heartedly chuckled, as you swayed a little to the left. You had finally caved in. Letting the tiredness take over. Almost falling over on your side to which Alex immediately caught you.

“Woah, woah, hey I got you okay.”

“J-Julie…” You gasped in realization, almost forgetting about how hard this was gonna be on her. “She doesn’t know! Oh my god! I-I can’t do that to her, she can’t go through any more losses, she can’t!” You clung to the front of his flannel, the right side of your face pressed against his chest. “What am I gonna do, what am I gonna do?” You repeated over and over. 

“Y/n, I need you to breathe. Okay baby, I need you to breathe.” Luke gripped your shoulder making sure you met his eyes as he nodded at you.

“I-I can’t.” You heaved. “I can’t!” You squeezed your eyes shut. “I told Julie I’d see her after the show tonight…but I can’t.” You shook your head. Reggie cried as well, reverting back and forth from you and where they laid down your body. “I don’t get to go home. I can’t make up with my parents. Why me? Why now? I didn’t do anything wrong!” You pleaded for all of this to make sense to you. “I didn’t do anything wrong…” You fell back restless into Alex’s arms.

“I know, baby. I know.” Luke cupped your cheek, cooing at you softly. “Hey, look at me.” You shook your head no. “Y/n, look at me, please!” And you did. “I got you. We all got you. We’re gonna get through this. Every step and every second. Including telling Julie the truth, okay?” You nodded, gripping your hand over Luke’s arm that caressed your face, and gripping Reggie’s hand that held onto yours for support. 

“What are we gonna do about my body?” You all slowly turned your heads to it.

-

“You sure this is where you want to be?” Alex asked to be sure. You looked back at yourself. You were down by the beach where Reggie’s old house used to be. Your body was cold to the touch. Your lips were blue. Your clothing had been ripped by your own hand.

An attack gone wrong, is what you kept telling yourself. The ripped articles would hopefully make it look more believable.

“Yeah…” You dragged out. “My body will be found by someone eventually. The police will hopefully take care of the rest. We should tell Julie before it gets back to her.” You stood back up from where you were crouched down. “I can’t believe I’m gonna add on to her pain.” You stared at your corpse. The boys looked at each other, then at you. Luke stepped closer to you and guided your head to lay on his shoulder. His lips pressing into your hair.

“It wasn’t your fault. Plus you’re still here, so Julie won’t be going through your loss alone. She still has you here.” Alex offered his optimism.

“Yeah…but for how long?” You sighed.

“We can’t know for sure, but we’ll get through it together.” Reggie placed his hand gently on your shoulder to make you feel better.

Luke had pulled away slowly. Stepping forward to get closer to your corpse. He bent down and pressed a kiss to your temple. A last goodbye to your human body. It was scary staring at yourself. An image that would forever be engraved into your memory. Alex, and Reggie followed suit. Alex kissed you on the head where he’d usually leave his affectionate kisses. And Reggie being the charmer, he gently picked up your hand and placed a kiss on top of it. Each bidding their farewells to you where they casually liked to show their affection. The temple, the head, and the hand. All that was left was the cheek. Where you laid a kiss yourself. Yours lingered longer than the boys. As an ‘I’m sorry this happened to us’ because you were sorry. You were upset that your life was cut short, and now you had to be okay with leaving yourself behind. For others to find you and keep the memory of you alive. Though you knew you hadn’t much to fear, you knew Julie wasn’t one to forget the ones she loved. You stepped back to be lined up with the boys as you all took in your corpse once more.

“I don’t know what to say.” You sighed.

“Send yourself off. Say your name…go from there.” Alex suggested.

“That’s actually…not a bad idea. Yeah, okay. I-I like that.” You nodded, giving him a small smile. “I’m Y/n Y/L/N. I was born on M/D/Y and I died on August twenty-six, two-thousand twenty, at nine thirty pm.”

[starboundanon]

Hello!!

I'll start by saying that I love your fics and really like your blog ♥️ I agree with great part of your takes, especially about how dark of a character Anakin/Vader truly is, despite the fandom woobifying him! I also apologize in advance by how big this ask is 😭

That said, there's something that always made me curious and I'm burning to ask... You've said in a previous post that you didn't like how easily Padmé forgave Anakin for everything he did in canon, that you thought it was psychotic. So what separates Padmé's unconditional forgiveness of Vader's crimes from Luke's equally unconditional forgiveness, for you? I mean, both characters were personally, terribly hurt by Vader. I admit that my knee-jerk reaction when I see people with a similar opinion is always "oh, it's sexism, because Padmé is a woman and Luke is a man, and compassion from a man is revolutionary while compassion from a woman makes her weak" 🙄 but you've always seemed so sensible and reasonable and that can't be the case with you. So I'm genuinely curious about your perspective! Especially because you ship Vaderluke like I do, and Luke and Vader's relationship under romantic lenses gets easier to compare with Anidala.

(Also this entire ask works under the assumption that you do appreciate Luke's forgiveness of Vader, despite knowing he was a terrible father in canon—a far cry from fanon's Dad Vader—and obviously didn't deserve it. I got the vibe from your fics and your posts that you do! But if you don't and you think RotJ shouldn't have ended like that, actually, then I understand that I clowned and you can just ignore this 🤡)

I agree with you that a lot of the heat Padmé gets in the Star Wars fandom (while Luke is canonized for essentially carrying her legacy and vindicating her beliefs) is the result of sexism. But in my own experience within this fandom, anon, I’ve seen sexism against her in the opposite way that you’ve described, and it was that sexism that I was reacting to in the ask you’re referring to here, and the reason why I unintentionally sounded so snarly.

Playing that ask game came on the heels of reading post after post after post praising Padmé for her unwavering faith and loyalty, for her selfless forgiveness, for her unconditional love for her husband. And while, yeah, sure, those things are technically all virtues, praising a woman for having those qualities in response to her mass murderer husband slaughtering hundreds of children REEKS of sexism and tone-deafness to me.

Because that really is the perfect woman, isn’t it? She’s loyal to you no matter what you do, you are the only thing she wants in the whole galaxy (despite being rich, with an important, full-time career, pregnant, or a fucking QUEEN). She will defend you after you’ve physically assaulted her and die believing you were a good man. She will forgive you, love you unconditionally, ignore every single one of your red flags and literally die of a broken heart if you betray her. A flawless, devoted woman!

…At least, at the time of answering that ask, that was the spiel I had gotten from a myriad of stanakins, and from George Lucas’ writing after watching AotC for the first time. I was reactive and unnecessarily vicious in that ask — and I apologize for being that way — because I don’t think Padmé’s unwavering dedication to Anakin is admirable, anon. I think it’s unhealthy. And I LOVE that it’s unhealthy — I’m a darkfic writer, I love unhealthy ships! — but I was just so sick and tired of people giving Padmé the Virgin Mary treatment when her relationship with Anakin was fucking UNHINGED.

Luke’s forgiveness of Vader has its own undertones of unhealthiness, but it also has things Padmé’s doesn’t. Even when Luke can feel Anakin’s conflicted feelings through their Force bond, he still has moments where he doubts there’s actually still good in his father, where he declares him dead like Obi-Wan did, when he lashes out and tries to KILL him for threatening Leia — Luke forgives Vader, yes, but at least we get to see him being ANGRY with him. We don’t get that with Padmé. Anakin confesses to murdering Tusken children and Padmé looks at him like THIS for fuck’s sake

The only reason we don’t get to see Padmé pick up a blaster and aim it at his grinning face on Mustafar IS sexism, imo. She’s eight months pregnant! Where’s the rage? Where’s the resentment? She has none, she isn’t allowed any! Why? We can debate it till we’re blue in the face, but I will always consider it a massive disservice to Padmé’s character that she was denied the humanity Luke was given in the OT, to the point that her and Anakin’s relationship came across as so ridiculously codependent it was almost silly.

[obiwanwhat]

Nothing Can Ever Be Simple Snippet #3

It’s not until the final day of the briefing, right before they part ways, that he makes the request she’d been dreading.  

“Will you come with me? Help me rebuild the Jedi Order? You know where it went wrong…you could help me make it better,” he begins, but she’s already shaking her head.  

“I made my choice when I walked away from the Jedi all those years ago.” She says. “I’m not a Jedi, and I don’t think I ever could be one again.  I wish you the best of luck with rebuilding the Jedi Order but I can’t be a part of it.” He nods, disappointed.

“I understand,” he says, but he doesn’t, not really. How could he? He has stars in his eyes when he says the word Jedi.  To him they’re a myth, a larger than life legend that he’s trying to bring back to life.  They’re wonderful and magical and the saviors of the universe.  Even now, even having heard her story, she can tell he still can’t quite convince himself that the Jedi Order could have made mistakes.

To her, they’re the deeply flawed people who raised her and loved her who still looked her dead in the eye to cast her out, not because she was guilty, but because it was easy.  

When he hears the name Anakin Skywalker, he thinks of his final moments with his father, when Anakin triumphantly returned to the Light and killed the Emperor to save him.  When she thinks of Anakin Skywalker…well, it’s a lot more complicated than that.  She knows that’s not fair to Luke - Vader tried to kill him too, after all, many times.  He bears the physical scars of that more than she does - she still has both her flesh and blood hands, after all. But it’s easier to forgive a father you never really knew until he saved you than it is to forgive one who saved you hundreds of times only to betray you in the end.  

She doesn’t think he understands that.

She wishes they could be family.  It would have come easily to them, she thinks, in another world. It’s what Anakin - the old Anakin, the real Anakin - would have wanted.  It’s what Padme would have wanted.  But he needs her to be someone she isn’t, and she doesn’t know how to stop resenting that.  As long as that’s the case…she doesn’t think family is possible.  

[edge-oftheworld]

“yknow as a fandom I think we could do a better job of appreciating Sierra Deaton”

No just have less appreciating Sierra cause she’s been anti-black, a creep towards fans, invalidated a 5sos fan’s mental health because they’re a fan, trauma dumped on young fans and overshared, slut shamed Ashton, and so on and so forth

hey anon!! Thanks for this concise little list. But seriously, thanks for making me think and pull together a bunch of ideas in my head; I hope in this essay really you can see some of my thought process. I can’t imagine how hard it’d be to be reaching out with something really hard and expect compassion and get a negative interaction instead—if that was you or whoever it is I hope they’re doing better and finding community and people who care. And I don’t want to pretend she’s perfect or has done everything right, we know that’s not how it is, Sierra knows that, Luke knows that, so does, idk, God.

and I’ll admit I’m a bit old fashioned when it comes to cancelling people and I do like to try and see the good in people where possible—sometimes imo it’s the only way to get any positive change. to look beyond the superficial where someone might lash out—is it in malice, or fear, a momentary impulse they might regret later or maybe realise for some reason were pushed to a point where they couldn’t manage anything better. I know I’ve been to that point and I know how I spiral if I don’t know how to forgive myself. I also know this is a fandom where shit gets real and we’re young and hurting and sometimes that just makes us defenceless against our idols and those around them being human, and the shitty side of human we all have potential to become too. And we live in an era of systemic racism and lack of access to mental health services which both causes and exacerbates so many issues that, was the world not so anti-black; had every mentally ill child and youth a support network in real life (instead of the way many of us often spend years only ever feeling seen by the songs we listen to, 5sos songs easily filling in that need)—we might be a little more able to be like ‘wtf that’s not cool but that’s a her problem’ and move on. and can I say we do deserve a world that doesn’t discriminate. And in order to get what we deserve we have to make it. and in order to make it we have to learn how to do better and let people learn to do better—these people aren’t going anywhere. somehow bad people have to turn into good people and yes in order to do that they have to be made accountable. Repentance is truly a beautiful thing; it’s also something that can’t happen when we feel scared and in our survival brain. When we feel like that we tend to easily get into us vs them and dig deeper into our (often wrong) convictions and that’s actually an evolutionary response to when we have to fight against predators; we don’t have time to think ‘but what if they’re actually in the right’ when we’re fighting for our lives.

and this isn’t the place to psychoanalyse Sierra. I don’t know exactly what goes on in her head, I don’t know if she’s sorry or even remembers these things but I do know the rift between her and fans has been quite heated and even scary at some points over the years. And maybe I have the privilege of never being someone who has been hurt by her to have grace for the fact that ‘gotta be nice to this fan they’re having an experience of a lifetime to be interacting with my partner and I’m gonna give the benefit of the doubt that they’re not one of the individuals in a sea of fans who all look identical to me sending me death threats’ is a hell of a lot to put your brain through every single day. If she (and it’s not if, we know she did) make mistakes. If there was too much trauma to hold and she put it out on the internet to cope in a season of her life. If the insecurity became jealousy of one of the most important people in her s/o’s life which became insults that were thrown around back in high school before everyone realised how uncool they were and tried to stop using them but they were still burned in their brains to come out on impulse (I actually have no idea how that specific event went down, or if there were one or multiple). I hope they sorted that out internally; I don’t know what else I can do but trust that it’s something they’re capable of doing and care for each other enough as a group of friends and songwriters to do.

I wanted to save the lateral racism example for last because I feel like everything above is kind of a metaphor for it, if you follow. I’m coming from a place where I’m southeast asian and part white living in a largely western country, so is Sierra, so I’m automatically going to see her as ‘like me’ (and can I say how rarely I get this kind of representation?) whereas if you’re black, or if you find your experience more relatable to blackness, then you’re going to experience this very differently. I can’t know your experience. I also know that asians can be brutal in this area: it’s the reason my childhood best friend hasn’t told her dad she got engaged to her partner nearly a year ago. Lateral racism isn’t okay. But unfortunately what happens is often when you’re discriminated against in some ways we’re conditioned to take the side of the oppressor against someone who’s discriminated against in other ways. It’s all ‘okay maybe I’m x and I should be y but at least I’m not z’ and again it’s that evolutionary survival instinct to not be at the bottom of the pile; channeled in horrible ways into today’s society. It takes a lot of effort and self awareness to be like ‘we’re united in this experience of being oppressed, together we have the power to make a stand that this is Not Cool’ and most of us fail the first few times. but what’s important is we keep trying. we can all heal together when we do.

so anon I have no idea who you are or your background or how much you’ve had to wrestle with this yourself, if you’ve had to stand up against communities who were hostile, if you’ve had to do this while being discriminated against from outside as well, if you know the experience of not fully being one race but not fully being another etc. and also you’ve got no obligation to like Sierra, this is such unsolicited advice but this whole release period for boy ep I’ve really just been thinking ‘it’s healthy to feel our feelings even when it’s not always pleasant isn’t it’ and wherever that hurt is please love it embrace it bring it into the light whatever you do to realise you’re valuable and you don’t have anything to be ashamed of. even your mistakes and where you’ve hurt people and regret that, you’re gonna grow so much from that and have so many chances to do better. maybe you’re young and you haven’t had the chance to hurt anyone yet. I hope you manage to stay that way but if you do, I hope you can forgive yourself too. I hope you dip your toes in activism for Black Lives Matter, for mental health, for sex positivity, I can see you really value these things and that’s really encouraging to see.

and in the end: sometimes I have to be annoyingly human and come down to the fact that I really enjoy the songs that Sierra writes. I’ve fanned enough about gothic summer on this blog already. I enjoy the things she writes and so I listen to them, and I’m not actively boycotting Sierra specifically, I love the creative outcomes when she works with 5sos as a whole, with Luke, with other artists I love as well. As a result I do care about her as a person, I always do, and hey, I respect her funny little routine donations and the undertones of her UNICEF donation back in October and the random animal sanctuary and the occasional nod to some Australian mental health charity.

I’ve inferred a lot about how much more relaxed and at ease and free to feel things and process life at his own pace Luke seems to be with her than beforehand—and the fan in me who’s so protective of these guys just desperately wants someone to be there for them in ways that really matter and I feel like we have seen that, even despite the often rocky nature of the relationship between Sierra and Luke’s fans. Luke is someone I relate to a lot, and there are some experiences that are really hard to come back from, and I’m really proud of him right now and I do get the impression being with Sierra has really helped him get there. I don’t know for sure, I could be wrong, but I’m always going to be grateful when celebrities get to be human and not have their lives and choices dictated by fans either directly or indirectly. I’ll take the allies I can in my activism and even if there are criticisms around sincerity I do generally see Sierra trying and I want to appreciate that. I don’t want to say she hasn’t hurt anyone ever and I pray for resolution and peace for the fans, for Ashton, for her, for the Black community in general, for everyone who’s been hurt in the wake of colonialism and the generational trauma it breeds. And then I’ll go listen to bloodline and think, maybe in some ways we were born inheriting the sins of our parents before we knew better. But every day I discover ways of choosing better and compassion takes us so far and I hope every day I learn a bit more about how to channel that.

thank you for the ask, it really got me thinking and the opportunity to compile some thoughts I’d had that I didn’t realise formed a neat little mindmap around Sierra as a case study!! Much more fun than regular sociology. And I didn’t even get to delve into the political history of Saigon that I’ve been trying to understand more about!!

[wardlowsbabydoll]

Sis! I wouldn’t mind seeing a part two to ‘Traitor’ maybe where Christian tries to make amends with the Reader?

Honestly nonny, I wasn't even thinking about making a Part Two to 'Traitor' but now here we are!

Here you go nonny! I hope you enjoy it!

Also... sorry this took so long, I still hope you enjoy it nonny!

Traitor (Part Two)- Christian Cage

Warnings: Mentions of parental death

Word Count: 717

You managed to avoid him like the plague. If you even saw the back of his head you were already moving in the other direction. It was difficult to do, thankfully your friends in the locker room would alert you to where Christian was so you knew to avoid that area. It was hard to not talk to him. In the months that he was your mentor he grew to be one of your closest confidants. It hurt that he would use your family for cheap heat.

            You had heard from Allie that he had been looking for you so you hid in the women’s locker room, knowing that it was out of bounds and he couldn’t go in. You knew one of these days you would end up running into him, it was only inevitable.

You were also prepared for him to take his revenge on you after you spit in his face, and slapped him. When you had walked backstage the night of the ‘slap heard ‘round the world’ as the fans had dubbed it you had expected to be fined heavily, suspended and possibly even fired. When you made eye contact with Tony, Matt, and Nick they looked stunned; they didn’t know what to say to you. To your shock, you hadn’t been fined or fired, but actually praised for your gutsy move. Tony knew how sensitive a topic Luke’s death was for you and usually you were quite timid so this burst of confidence shocked them.

After being in the locker room for almost an hour you decided the coast was clear and just as you were about to duck out of there you let out a squeal when Christian seemed to appear out of nowhere. “Leave me alone.” Were the first words to come out and when you tried to shut the door he put his hand there stopping you. “I wanted to talk to you.” He said quietly, almost unsurely which was new coming from him.

“Talk about what? My father, again? About how he’s dead? About how you never really cared about us? I understand our industry and I understand where things aren’t true. But this was something that was over the line. You knew how important my dad was, not just to Jack, but to me too. How do you think my mom and Sophie felt when you told them that Jack was a piece of shit?” You said, once again trying to shut the door but it was no use because Christian kept throwing his body parts in the way.

“I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to hurt you—” you cut him off “But you did. You can’t expect me to trust you again just like that, all because you said sorry. Sorry doesn’t cut it this time.” He grabbed your arm slightly, making you flinch “Let me at least try and make it up to you, please?” You thought about it for a minute, he did seem sincere but you didn’t want to end up hurt again. Maybe keeping him at a distance wouldn’t be such a bad thing.

“Fine, but not today. Not now. I still have every right to be angry with you. I will let you know when I’m ready for you to make it up to me. Until then, please, leave me alone.” The minute you received a nod from him you shut the door in his face.

Pacing the locker room again, your mind raced a million miles per hour as so many thoughts passed through at once. The main ones being ‘How stupid can I be?’ ‘Why did I say yes?’ ‘How could you trust him so easily?’

The answer to the last one is you don’t. He taught you that you don’t just hand out your trust only to have it smashed, you make them work for it. And if they break it, they’ll have to work to gain your forgiveness. They won’t ever properly re-earn your trust, but your forgiveness is better than nothing.

Christian was telling himself that as he walked away from the women’s locker room. ‘At least she’ll forgive me.’

Two broken hearts began to mend themselves that day, they would never be perfect hearts again, but at least the pieces weren’t destroyed.

[adultswim2021]

Robot Chicken: Star Wars Episode II | November 16, 2008 - 11:30PM | Special

Time for more re-re comedy for gay nerds. Hey--HEY! That wasn’t very nice. Don’t say stuff like that! Okay. I am sorry. I forgive you. Thanks. 

Robot Chicken Star Wars! It’s one of my least favorite things. I ain’t never seen this stuff, and I wish I didn’t decide I had to watch it for a blog that no one reads. I wonder if I will do an exhaustive breakdown of each sketch? Um… HOW ABOUT NO. This shit sucks and just because it’s segmented doesn’t mean I have to be! Segmented, I mean.

Okay, so here’s what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna rank my top three and bottom three sketches. This is going to be very hard, because I don’t like any of them, really. And, because I don’t like any of them, really, I will likely just be picking stuff borderline at random. Also, I skipped over some real short ones for consideration cuz who cares. Here, both lists are worst to best. 

BOTTOM THREE (WORST TO LEAST-WORST) 

Luke's Lack of Perspective. This is the one where Leia scolds Luke for being sad about Obi-wan dying because her whole planet was vaporized. The premise is lame, and also they cast the real Carrie Fisher, who has old lady voice and sounds nothing like her younger self. You can tell they pitched her up a little to try and make up for it. It’s just distracting, and the sketch isn’t even worth recasting.

AT-AT Drag Race. I couldn’t even really make much sense of this one. There’s a weird edit in it that I remember thinking implied that it was a dream? Which it wasn’t, obviously, it just was edited awkwardly and the joke is just “wouldn’t it be funny if guys raced AT-ATs?" and who gives a fuck. I did like the visual of the AT-AT clicking it’s heels, though.

Going Out Like a Punk. This is the one where Uhh. I forgot his name, no really. I almost typed “Cowboy Bebop.” The bounty hunter guy that everyone loves just because he has a cool name that I forget what it even is. Bop-Bop Peranu, I think it is. Anyway, he’s in the Sarlac pit (I remembered that no prob) and talking about how he didn’t go out like a chump. This one seems like it’s aimed squarely at annoying dorks who think they’re clever for making the same observation. I watch television to get away from shitheads like this! Cartoons, mostly, but still! 

[EVERY OTHER SKETCH IS TIED FOR THE MIDDLE]

TOP THREE (WORST TO FIRST)

 Palpatine's Trip. Depicting Palpatine's annoying travels to the Deathstar, paralleling the annoyances of regular Earthly air travel. He gets annoyed by the chair placement in the throne room, and as indignities mount he says, to some one, “here, watch me tempt fate. (mock exasperation) could this day get any worse? (casually) I think I’m safe, because I said that ironically.” The punchline is he gets tossed by Vader, like at the end of Star Wars: The Last Crusade. I just really like the tempting fate/irony joke!

Anakin's Happy Place. Decent premise depicting Anakin slaying children at the end of Episode III. It's the darkest scene in all of Star Wars, and I was fine with what they did with it here. The joke at the end is a little dumb, but it’s fine. It’s Robot Chicken.

Mouse Droid. My favorite, because I could imagine making a fan-edit of the original Star Wars with zero changes except you add the insert shots of the little mouse guy driving the droid. I like when mice drive stuff. That's basically the only reason I liked this.

This has an “extended” version available, but I just watched the version on HBOMax. This is probably worse than the first special, but I don’t want to think about it too long. All of these sketches are dumb as shit and for dorks, which I DEFINITELY am not one of. Go to hell!

EPHEMERA CORNER

Clerks: The Animated Series (November 14, 2008 - 11:00PM)

This could very easily be a whole goddamn thing. It will probably be longer than other EPHEMERA CORNERs, but I’ll still try to be concise. Clerks the Animated Series was an animated spin-off of Clerks, the scrappy, vulgar, independent comedy from Kevin Smith. It’s cult success lead to him inexplicably having a career, including two direct movie sequels to clerks. This cartoon only lasted six episodes, two of which aired on ABC. They came out on DVD shortly after, with a racist audio commentary track for every episode.

I literally taped the Super Bowl because a website reported that the Clerks Cartoon was going to get a commercial during it. I diligently taped the two episodes that did air. ABC decided to air the fourth episode, which was a parody of courtroom dramas (and had a very funny non-sequitur ending allegedly completed by the Korean animators without any input from the American writers). After that they decided to air the second episode, which heavily referenced the first episode. It’s main concept was that it was a clip show, and Dante and Randal spent a significant portion of the episode flashing back only to the first episode, which hadn’t actually aired. 

The show was a fairly typical animated comedy of it’s time. The vulgarity was tamped down in favor of absurdist gags and cultural references. Mostly, it worked. There were some really funny ideas, and the commentary tracks had some really fun tidbits about planned episodes that never happened. Honestly, if I weren’t already privy to the doomed nature of the show, or we lived in the alternate dimension where this was allowed to continue for multiple seasons, I would probably aspire to write for this thing. With a few exceptions, the humor was even more on my wavelength than Kevin Smith’s movies.

Weirdly, I don’t think I ever actually watched this show on Adult Swim. I remembered it as a Comedy Central acquisition. When Adult Swim first aired, I really admired the fact that one could watch Fox’s Sunday Night cartoon line-up, switch to Adult Swim, and then when Adult Swim was over you could switch to Comedy Central and watch reruns of South Park, Duckman, and this. It was a real special time to have cable. Hot damn.

I really do wish this lasted longer. Deserved at least half the success of Family Guy. In my ideal world, this show takes off and Kevin Smith stops making movies. He only revisits the "canon" View Askewinverse in occasional comic book mini-series. You ever read his comics? His writing style comes off better in those, I think.

PLEDGE: The currently-ignored Adult Swim 2022 blog will return on some kind of non-daily schedule. I’ll finish out Baby Blues, and then do this. Happy, KON?? 

MAIL BAG

Time for some mail. Good lord. 

you gotten the adult swim 2021 group dm all riled up about xtacles. are you gonna do anything to fan these flames???

I dropped some bombs Hulk style, and things seem to be under control. You are right, they were out of line and it pissed me off!

dino and scott are excellent as mr burns would say. i forgive anything in their problematic past as long as they become the banner, ta ta for now

Despite the fact that one of them was nice to me once, and the other one made out with my friend (which is arguably also nice), I simply can’t. I like racist stuff, so I’m keeping the Minor Guys or whatever that show was called. Bye!

cahpo

?

so far it seems the only shows you like are space ghost, assy mcgee, and xtacles. i guess venture bros and morel orel made you cry, if that's a good thing. Anyway, just a like observation from this looky loo. Bye!

It is sorta fucked up that a TV show can make people cry. Should be illegal. But, hey, look out for the end of the year when I rerank all the Adult Swim shows. BYE!

and we say bye bye now

Bye bye! 

Bye bye!

Goodbye.

[aebi12]

Sinful Desires - Chapter 8

He had never seen so much disappointment on his mother's face.

When Alicent Hightower looked at Aemond there was usually relief, affection and pride in her gaze. A couple of times, as he grew up as a child obsessed with claiming a dragon, frustration and weariness had tinted his mother's brown eyes as she addressed him. But Aemond had never been the object of Alicent's anger and disillusionment.

“How could you be so stupid?”

Aemond doesn't need anyone to reproach him. No one can tell him anything worse than what he has said to himself. He knows he's put his family in an even more vulnerable position. He may have gained the support of the Baratheon, but now that he has become a kinslayer, the kingdom has another reason not to join their cause.

“My brother dared to do what we should have done in the first place,” says Aegon as he pours a glass of wine and places it in Aemond’s hands. “Tonight, we will celebrate in your honor”

If the lords of the council think it's a bad idea, they don't let their king know.

Aegon throws a grand feast and everyone ends up attending, but Aemond's mind is far, far away from the throne room and the music that echoes from the walls of the red keep.

How could he have been so stupid? Why had he been carried away by the rage of the moment? Why had he had to chase Luke? And the question that tormented him the most, why had he so easily lost control of Vhagar? Wasn't the dragon bonded to him enough? Or had she just decided to act on Aemond's hatred for his nephew? Because there was no mistaking how deeply he disliked Lucerys.

Alyssa is not going to forgive him. Alyssa probably repudiates him. What hopes does he now have of making her his wife?

Surely none.

Aemond leaves the throne room, fed up with the noise of the feast and the sidelong glances he is being directed at by those in attendance. He thought, over the years, he had grown accustomed to the scrutiny of courtiers, but apparently, he hadn't. For an instant, Aemond is once again the insecure boy who displayed his leather patch in public for the first time to hide his deformity. The feeling of vulnerability that he experiences at this moment makes him feel disgusted with himself, hadn't he spent years training to never feel this weak again? It seemed all his efforts had proven to be useless.

You'll have to get used to their whispers and stares, he tells himself as he stops in one of the galleries and leans on the balcony. The war is just beginning. And they'd better fear you than show you their courteous fake smiles.

“You are drinking more wine than usual tonight”

Helaena suddenly appears next to him and manages to startle him. He had been so engrossed in thoughts that he hadn't heard her arrive. She smiles at him as she moves into a position similar to his.

"Am I? Our brother, on the other hand, says that I don't usually drink enough."

"And since when do you follow Aegon's suggestions when it comes to drinking?"

Aemond drains his glass quickly and feels his sister's hand cover his. He tilts his face towards her and looks at Helaena's big blue eyes, her serene face, her platinum hair braided in the same style that she has worn since she was a child… there seems to be no reproach or disappointment in her gaze. Aemond covers her hand with his and breathes in her comforting scent of lavender. The familiarity of the scene transports him to his worst moments after the loss of his eye. Although he loved having his mother's attention, Alicent was a nervous wreck who managed to make him even more anxious with her extreme care and concern for him. Helaena, on the other hand, was a silent presence who managed to calm his mind and to whom he could speak openly about his pain.

Since the incident, Aemond could talk about almost anything with Helaena.

Sometimes he wondered if he was seeking her comfort as some kind of replacement for missing his moments in the godswood with Alyssa.

"You probably despise me too," he admits softly, almost a whisper.

"I know there's more to the story than you dare to tell," she shakes her head.

"Hel..."

“I'm not asking you to tell me” she squeezes his hand gently, “You'll tell whoever really needs to know. Someone who really matters"

Aemond questions her with his gaze, but she just smiles, mysteriously, and continues speaking, “Mother doesn't hate you either. She is just terrified and worried, but she loves us too much to hate us."

Part of him already knows his sister's words are true, but Aemond is relieved to hear it anyway.

“You are right. However, my actions have only managed to put us all in danger."

“We have lived our entire lives in danger, Aemond. Since we came into this world we have been in danger."

"I know but…"

"Do not seek to torment yourself anymore, little brother, it won't make any difference if you continue to wallow in your own misery."

Aemond smiles, "As my queen commands”

Helaena giggles charmingly, “I'm still getting used to that title. Come on, we should head back to the feast or our brother will wonder where we are."

The queen leads the way back to the throne room. Aemond watches the figure of his sister making her way slowly through the halls as her hand rests on her growing belly.

"Do you believe in Aegon's cause?" He wants to know, for it suddenly occurred to him that his sister is hardly ever included in his family's machinations.

Helaena stops and turns to look at him. Her expression serious and her eyes strangely sad as she replied, “He is our brother, my husband, and the father of my children. And I love my children with all my heart, Aemond."

He understands what she does not say or doesn't dare say directly. Her children, like Aegon, are a threat to a possible reign of Rhaenyra. Helaena knows that the two factions will not be able to coexist and there will be no peace in the kingdom as long as one side has totally disappeared to make way for the other. So, of course she's going to support Aegon, whether he deserves it or not, because the future of her children depends on it.

Aemond nods, and Helaena gives him one last sad smile before entering the throne room once more.

***

"Where is the king?" Otto asks Sir Arryk

Aemond notes the knight's hesitant expression and feels sorry for him. A warrior born on a noble house, having to be aware of the degenerate adventures of his brother.

“His grace woke up quite early in the morning and said that he would go to the dragon pit. He ordered us not to accompany him."

"Did he wake up early?" Helaena giggles.

The expressions of his grandfather and mother are even comical. Aemond certainly can't remember the last time his brother was awake before any of them.

"He did, my lord," Sir Arryk replies.

“If one possesses a thing the other will take it away,” says Helaena.

Aemond turns to his sister and gives her a questioning look, but she ignores him and stands up, "I'll go see the children, will you come with me, brother?"

He accepts and they walk silently to the children's room. Aemond still wonders about the meaning of Helaena's words, although he knows that his sister often makes such warnings from time to time.

“They haven’t woken up yet,” she says with a smile as she watches her children

The twins sleep peacefully next to each other, their hands intertwined, a gesture they have made since they were born and Aemond has witnessed countless times.

Only this time seeing that scene gives him a strange feeling, for this is the first time he seems to be aware of the special connection that exists between Jaehaerys and Jaehaera. Connection that Lucerys and Alyssa probably also shared.

And that he has destroyed.

His sister feels his turmoil because she turns to him and says, “Don’t do anything stupid”

Aemond only smiles and turns around, ready to leave the place.

“Aemond…”

But he doesn't answer and goes after Vhagar.

***

When Alyssa regains consciousness, she finds herself being transported inside a carriage.

The right side of her face hurts and feels a tingling sensation at the top of her lip, but when she tries to examine herself she notices that her hands are tightly tied with a rope.

Alyssa tries to ask for help, but her voice sounds strangely hoarse and it takes her a couple of times to clear her throat before she can scream

“I demand an explanation!” she says as she punches the side of the carriage with her fists, “Stop this at once!”

The driver seems to listen to her because the carriage suddenly stops and Alyssa's heart start to beat violently. She puts herself on guard trying to be prepared for whatever awaits her when someone shows up behind the doors, but when the familiar entrance to the Red Keep is visualized before her, she can't help but let her guard down as her mind works quickly to try to figure out what she is doing there.

There was a dragon, she suddenly remembers, I heard a dragon before I passed out

But surely Aemond would not have been foolish enough to send those men after her.

"What is the meaning of this?" she asks to the guards who seem as astonished as she feels

No one answers him. A man in a white cloak whom she does not recognize approaches one of the soldiers and whispers into his ear. The man nods and quickly the soldiers take Alyssa by the arms and pull her out of the carriage.

“What do you think you are doing?” she tries to struggle, but it's useless, so she resorts to threats, "My mother will have your head off for this"

The men ignore her and follow the white cloak into the palace. It doesn't take long for her to figure out that she is being led towards the throne room.

Aemond, where are you? She wonders as she is nearly dragged into the room and carelessly deposited at the foot of the iron throne, causing her to lose her balance and fall.

Dozens of eyes fall on her, and Alyssa watches the confused expressions of Alicent and Otto Hightower, Helaena, Maester Runciter, Tyland Lannister, and other lords. Aemond, however, is not among them.

Aegon the usurper's expression, however, is almost one of delight as he gazes at her from his seat on the throne.

"What is she doing here?" Queen Alicent asks her question before she has a chance to speak, "Sir Arryk untie the princess at once."

The knight walks over to Alyssa, and when he helps her to her feet, she can feel the pain in her knees. Surely it won't take long for bruises to form, but she is not interested in that at the moment. Alyssa feels humiliated, how dare they to treat her like this?

Sir Arryk cuts the rope that secured her wrists and removes his cloak to place it over her body. She hadn't noticed before, but the truth is that Alyssa is shivering from the cold. She adjusts the cloak to her body and notices her damp clothes, probably from the rain of the night before.

“Your Grace…” Otto begins, but Alyssa interrupts him.

"I demand to know what I am doing here" she tries to convey all the anger she feels in that sentence, but she fails miserably as her voice sounds shaky.

“You are the reason I gathered everyone here, niece,” Aegon replies without losing his smile, “You see, my mother and grandfather keep comparing me to our ancestor Aegon the Conqueror so I figured… what better way to honor the history of our house than following his example?"

"Aegon..." warns his mother, but he continues

“I wish my brother was here to hear this, but he will find out in due time. I intend to take a second wife, as the conqueror did, and I have decided to reserve that honor for you, Alyssa."

There is an awkward silence in the room during which Alyssa tries to convince herself that all this is not happening, that it is just a nightmare conjured up by her mind, that she is on a ship bound for White Harbor to be Lord Manderly's ward.

"Have you lost your mind?" Alicent screams at her son and manages to snap Alyssa out of her reverie.

"Your Grace, you already have a wife." Tyland Lannister chimed in.

"And I can have a second if I want," Aegon replies casually.

Alyssa meets Helaena's gaze, but she seems strangely absent, which is a shame because the young queen is probably the only ally she has in this place.

"I demand that you release me," she says, "I demand that you end this ridiculous spectacle because my mother, the rightful queen, will not take this confrontation lightly."

"Your mother is not the queen, I am the king!"

“You are no more than a usurper,” she hisses, her temper beginning to get out of control, “A second son that no one but this crowd of traitors would recognize as a monarch. Not even my grandsire wanted you on the throne. My mother was his only heir and she will get back what is hers. So, you better release me at once or the true queen and my brothers will respond with fire and blood."

"But fire and blood is what my Aemond already gave your brother and because of that, now your mother is nothing if not another weak woman crying the loss of her beloved son"

"What are you talking about? My mother has not lost a son."

Aegon looks at her with open curiosity and suddenly seems to realize something, “Haven't you heard yet, princess? Your brother Luke is dead."

Your brother Luke is dead.

Luke is dead.

The words echo in her head for a minute before she can respond.

"No," Alyssa refuses to believe such nonsense, "No, Luke went to Storm's End as an emissary and…"

“And he met Aemond there,” Aegon cuts her off, “It was a pretty short fight from what the fishermen said. Arrax was no match for Vhagar. Your brother's body fell to pieces in Storm Bay."

“Aemond wouldn't do that,” Alyssa replies, though her words sound unconvincing even to her. She knew that Aemond lived a prisoner of the resentment towards her brother, that he had never gotten over the insult and trauma of losing an eye. Aemond kept within him the desire for revenge towards Lucerys, yes, she was aware of that... but Aemond wouldn't dare kill him, right? “You are lying,” she replies, “If Luke were dead I would have felt it. I would know” Alyssa looks away from Aegon and towards the others present in the room, “Please tell me that he is lying” she pleads looking at Helaena.

But she sees the sadness in her eyes and her aunt just shakes her head.

A scream escapes from her mouth without being able to control it. Unbearable pain floods her entire being, bending her body and causing her to fall to her knees. Luke couldn't be dead. No, no, it had to be a lie.

***

The throne room doors open and Aemond Targaryen strides inside.

After his brief conversation with Helaena that morning, he had spent most of the day sitting next to Vhagar. It had been his intention to ride her, but in the end, he had chosen to simply stay close to her to continue reflecting on his problem. Besides, if he was honest, he was not sure that he was ready to return to the skies with her. Not yet.

In any case, and despite the incident, his dragon was still the closest friend he had. And he seemed to sense his rider's mortification because she had let out plaintive moans that Aemond knew had nothing to do with any injury or physical pain.

"What shall we do now, grumpy old lady?" he had asked her in a low voice

It's just that hours later he still didn't have a clear answer. The only thing he was certain of was that now more than ever, his duty was to protect his family at any cost and find a way to be close to Alyssa. The problem was that, as brave as he felt in a sword fight, he didn't think he had enough courage to face her. Not now.

Vhagar had roared again at that moment, and Aemond had ordered the dragon pit guards to bring him food. Although she was too big to live with the other dragons, she knew that she could continue to feed there.

"My prince, the king requires your presence in the Red Keep" one of the guards had said.

So, a grumpy and reticent Aemond had abandoned his dragon and headed back to the castle, wondering why his brother had sent for him.

No scenario he had formed in his mind, however, included Alyssa.

And that is why when he enters the throne room and observes the scene before him, it is hard for him to react to the surprise of seeing his princess drowned in tears in the floor by the throne.

“Alyssa?! What is she doing here?"

The girl looks up as she recognizes his voice, desperation painted on her face, "Please tell me it is not true, tell me you didn't do it"

Aemond doesn't have to ask her what she means for there is only one reason that would cause her so much pain. He holds her gaze, but he is unable to tell her anything and she accepts her silence as confirmation. The prince is able to observe the exact moment when he breaks her heart, so he tries to get closer to her. "Alyssa, I..."

"Do not come near me" she replies, suddenly standing up with renewed strength and taking a few steps back, "I don't want you near me"

Her words hurt him, but it's nothing compared to the pain she's feeling. Her brother is dead. And it is her lover who has murdered him.

She will never see Luke again

“This is what you always wanted,” she says in an angry voice.

She will never be able to hug her brother again.

"Alyssa, let me explain, please," Aemond pleads, his desperate face and his good eye trying to hold back tears.

"This is the revenge you and your mother always wanted, since he took your eye"

She would never again hear Luke's laugh.

Stupid, stupid, little girl.

Pain gives way to rage inside her. A rage like she had never felt before. Alyssa watches Aemond's face, who tries to get closer to her again and only has one idea in her mind: to make him suffer as much as she is suffering.

Let's not fool ourselves, Alyssa. You know you wouldn't be able to act against him if it came to that. That is what Daemon had told her. Well, she is about to prove him wrong. Because there is only one thought on her mind when she allows Aemond to reach out to her and put his arms around her: make him pay.

"Look at me, please" he whispers in a strangled voice.

"You killed half my soul," she replies, "But if you can have your revenge then I'll have mine too."

Alyssa takes advantage of the bewilderment in his expression to take the dagger that he has in his belt and plunge it into his belly.

[thornescratch]

Bobadinluke 😈

I ship it! (lol duh)

What made you ship it: Like a lot of people, five minutes of the Mandalorian made me get into Din/Luke and reawakened my massive Star Wars love (I grew up on the original trilogy and those damn Ewok movies), and then tumblr started randomly showing me things from that tag, so I ran across a story that I really liked, and I ended up checking out the author’s AO3 account. I ended up reading a Bobadinluke story she was also writing, and then joined her newly created discord server on a whim, and one thing just led to another. Plus, like, Tem’s voice.

What are your favorite things about the ship? I like how it‘s three dudes who all have very weird and super intense father/parent issues, and yet all of them manage to have unique father/parent issues, which makes it all the more interesting when those three collide. I also like how it includes a lot of bonus tropes in addition to the daddy issues. Enemies to lovers! Strangers to lovers! Reluctant allies! Age difference! Size difference! Loaded history! Found family! It gives you the opportunity for big ol’ emotional exchanges, and also characters fucking nasty. I like a wide spectrum like that.

I also like the parallels that accompany all three characters, not just in terms of losing family at an early age and how that fundamentally changes their life direction, but also in terms of being thrust into a role or identity that they didn’t necessarily ask for or know how to handle. I like how each of them struggles with how to grow or develop a culture or place that’s had a lot of history. I like how their three personalities would fit (and clash) and how each of them has strengths and weaknesses that the other two supplement or draw upon.

Also as mentioned, I was into SW from an early age, so Luke is one of the OG members of my Short Blond Over Powered Twink That I Enjoy Seeing Get Wrecked group. Why settle for watching him get wrecked by one Mando when I can have two, yknow.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? I think fandom in general tends to target Han as having the most issues with Luke shacking up with Din and Boba, or use him as the comic relief, but I think it would actually be Leia who’d have the hardest time giving approval or who would dig her heels in on accepting it. I don’t think Han would necessarily like it, but I think Han’s more likely to be pragmatic about it.

Leia, on the other hand-- I don’t really see her easily getting over or forgiving Boba for working for Vader, hunting Luke, turning Han over to Jabba, and standing by and witnessing her captivity and humiliation at Jabba’s. (In fact, I think the bit in Tales of the Bounty Hunters where she and Boba have a hilariously hateful little sleepover together and discuss their respective moral codes doesn’t mean she’d respect him; I think if anything, it would raise her contempt.) So, scenarios or set ups where Leia has no problem with Boba or is dismissive of Han’s feelings about him tend to make me skeptical. Plus, like, the optics of being a senator and trying not to let your career be sunk from your dumbass twin who is also the last Jedi having relationships with a crime lord and the king of a bunch of militant warriors going stir-crazy.

I also think the relationship isn’t necessarily always going to start with Din as the center. That’s actually one of the things I find interesting about it, since Boba and Luke have their weird history going back to Boba hunting Luke down for Vader, and Luke’s role in Boba ending up in the sarlacc. (I think fandom sometimes sleeps on the whole Luke and Boba fighting in Obi-Wan’s hut. I want more shit written about that.) But that’s a fun thing about the relationship; it changes dramatically based on the order in which the participants get involved. Din/Boba adding Luke is different from Din/Luke adding Boba, which is in turn different from Boba/Luke adding Din.

[lya-dustin]

All is bliss

Chapter 18

Gif by:@feodor-dostovesky

Taglist: @mercedesdecorazon @darylandbethfanforever9 @sweethoneyblossom1 @ewanmitchellcrumbs

Cw: mentions of bullying, trauma, infant death,stillbirth, biological warfare, implications of marital rape, murder etc

Anything used to reduce her to tears when they were children, so much so that her Septa used to say her name should have been Daella.

The aftermath of his toast had been him for the first time in his life feeling the brunt of her anger, everyone shocked into silence because no one has ever seen that side of her and the unanimous agreement that Rhaenyra and her family should return to Dragonstone at first light.

The reason for his behavior was utterly forgotten in the mess after.

Not that anyone actually cared in the first place, even his mother had forgotten the incident with Aegon’s pig prank given she chose the menu for tonight.

Aemond doesn’t bother with being discreet as he goes to the place that is so very sacred to the both of them.

The fire has not been lit and yet in the dark he knows exactly where she is.

And even if he hadn’t known he could easily follow the sounds to their source.

Aemma’s knees are folded to her chest as she heaves with every sob.

Looking at how wretched his toast has made her has him wondering if it was even worth it.

She looked up at him with bewilderment and dried her tears with her sleeve. “Out of all the things you could have said you chose that.

Has it ever occurred to you that the same insults you used tonight will be used against our children?”

Instead of answering her question he digs out his handkerchief out of his pockets and offers it to her.

She had made it for him, the dragon on the corner being done in both green and silver thread, a small and yet thoughtful gesture that always reminded him of her.

“Sometimes I wonder if your view on bastards will extend to your own children.” She admits taking the piece of fine cotton to his relief.

“That is different, Aemma.” Different because they would be his children, and no one would be able to see they were not Aegon’s.

“Hypocrite.” She mutters, at least she had stopped crying.

He’d rather Aemma be angry at him than crying because of him.

“I am sorry my words hurt you.” Because that is the one thing he is actually sorry for.

He is not sorry for making his toast, he is just sorry his insults towards her brothers also struck her.

“Why did you say it?” she asks, looking at him knowing he won’t lie about it.

“Luke saw the pig between us and laughed. I couldn’t take it, not when your brothers act as if our childhood was all dragons and rainbows.” He admits and comes to sit beside her on the floor, leaning his back on the bookcase and wishing he could reach more than her soft green skirt.

“I’m sorry my words hurt you, Aemee.” He repeats his apology straining his eye to see if she nods.

“I suppose I can forgive that; Luke may feel guilt for taking your eye, but he does not remember Aegon’s pranks were meant to be cruel.” She accepts his apologies and makes excuses for her little brothers, perhaps she was right or perhaps she was biased because it sounds ridiculous when you factor in that Luke and Jace had been seven and nine at the time of the Pink Dread.

“I’m sorry for hitting you.” She said and he dismissed it.

She had struck him, and it had hurt more emotionally than physically, but he doesn’t hold it against her.

It had led to an epiphany.

He is in love with her.

Perhaps he has always been and it had taken for him to make the glass spill over with his words for him to admit it.

Or perhaps it was a recent development and it had been the feeling of her hand connecting with his cheek for him to know it.

“We can stay here if you wish.” He offered hoping she’d leave her safe place and join him on the rug again.

“I’d like that.”

“I suppose I should thank you,” the queen says quietly as the witch woman closes the door behind her.

“Not many have the courage to thank me, most like to forget it ever happened.” Alys said with a nod.

Alicent had only been wed for a scant six months when the bastard of Harrenhal saw her crying in the sept.

If she were with child Viserys would cease visiting her.

If he were to die, she would be free of him.

You won’t have to suffer him for long, your grace, that wound on his back won’t ever heal, Alys had said lighting a candle to the Crone.

The Maester said it had, Alicent had pointed out.

The Crone has given me the power to heal and to kill, and she has asked me to help you, the witch had said.

“It wasn’t until today I realized it had truly happened, perhaps most wonder if it was just a figment of her imagination.” The queen said in her defense. “What did you do to Queen Aemma?”

Had she killed Queen Aemma’s babes with her magic?

“Nothing, I had yet to come into my abilities, but little Prince Aegon did live for a few moons before dying in his sleep and I like to believe I was the reason she had those few precious moments with him.” The witch answered and lit a candle to the Mother, the statue had been broken after her death, as if the Gods themselves were mourning her too.

Viserys had ordered the new statue to be made in Aemma’s likeness. Holding Baelon in her arms and surrounded by their dead children as toddlers clutching her skirts, Alyssa ,who was stillborn two moons after the Great Council, and Aegon ,who died in his cradle when Rhaenyra was ten.

Alicent knows when she dies no one will make a statue for her.

She’s damned herself to keep them safe.

They are only safe if Aegon is king and Alicent rules the Court.

Once he is king this stops.

“What would it cost for me to make Aegon king?” the queen asks knowing there is no going back from this.

“Everything.”

“He is your lover.” Jace looks sick to his stomach at the realization.

“Yes, father of my child because Aegon, thank the gods, no longer can sire a child.” Aemma said as they readied their saddles.

Aemond would be staying, they had thought it would be best if he were to delay his visit to Helaena for a while.

Jace had caught them sharing a long kiss goodbye.

Even worse, Aemond had said the three words she had both been dreading and wanting to hear for so long.

I love you; he had said as he kissed her so intensely, she had forgotten she was to leave.

It would have been such a romantic moment that they’d carry in their hearts forever if Jace had not cleared his throat and been blushing like a maid.

“He loathes us, how can you love him?” he asks the question she was always asking herself.

Would his love for her be stronger than his hatred for her family?

Even she doesn’t hate his mother and grandfather as much as he hates her brothers.

And sure, it would have been much easier if the person she fell in love with had not been him, but it had happened.

By the time she had realized she was in love with him it was too late to stop herself from doing so.

“I don’t know, you cannot ask why about love, little brother.” Aemma answered. “There’s a reason Socrates called it a madness.”