#madcom auditor x reader

[shrimplymoray]

I've been waiting for this for 10.. no 10,000 years... Can you please write something related to Auditor x Reader (AAHW soldier or engineer or other combat unit) everything is at your discretion ;)

AUDI LOVERS!!! UNITEEEE!!! I literally love all characters (minus church and Jorge) but audi is neglected in my little crow brain, so it will be my pleasure to write for em! *As a little note, there is a lot of different HCs about what pronouns to use for Auditor. I will use They/them as a base, unless requested differently, as i think this is easy enough to resort to and write with, but if you prefer me to change, feel free to send another ask and i will do!

The Auditor X AAHW!Reader - Favoritism

An agency meant to restore the balance of Nevada. A place to serve a greater purpose, may that cost your life or not. A place where you are meant to be equal and throw down the one that started all that hs been going on in this hell of a place... and yet equal is the least you are. Was it fate? A Curse? or perhaps a blessing... Who knows it, by now. What started as a simple job of guarding the agency where the big boss themself, The Auditor, works, soon turned into more... They don't even hide it. It is not as if this is some form of illegal stuff, maybe professional malpractice, but not illegal. If anything, they have pride in showing you off as an example to other Soldats of your league. "So many attacks to the AAHW... So many facilities UTTERLY destroyed due to so many of your incompetences... If it weren't for one of your companions, i bet not even this facility would be running as well as it is, now would it?" Comments about the favoritism towards you, comments that usually would destroy one, but somehow, you are always safe. As usual, you were specifically called to The Auditor's office under the discussion of security check ups. "Boss, I'm here." "Very well, come near." Others would be dying in fear, but somehow, the least thing you feel in this office is fear, as you approach your boss. "Dear soldat, one that works so much for such a great cause... It is not easy to pass through what you do, are you aware?" Their voice held a reverberation, as their hand caressed your armored face. "Yes, I do am..." "You are free to say as you wish in this office, you know? no need to keep the professional formalities." That comment made you let out the breath you were holding. "Dear, you do realize that, uhm..." You tried wording it nicely but failed to think of an actual nice way to say what you wanted "Others are noticing the favoritism?" "And?" Their eyes seemed to narrow, almost trying to read your mind with them. "And what if this ends up badly? like... if the other soldats are aware, wouldn't this make me a target for the enemy? Hank?" "You are assuming he would even reach here, and that i wouldn't be able to make sure he suffers a thousand deaths before touching on you? How sweet, makes me want to take a bite out of you, really." Although their tone didn't pass the same sentiment their words did, you did trust your boss- no, your lover- enough to know that those are meant truthfully. With a sigh, you reiterate what you have to say almost daily: "Just try toning it a little bit down, maybe?" And as usual, they replied: "I will consider your request thoroughly, dear."

PLEASE AUDI DESERVES SO MUCH MORE LOVE, I ADORE THEM SO MUCH DGASHGDSHAGDJGDSJA Hope you enjoy this!!

[nevadas-night-time-novelist]

Auditor, Phobos, 2BDamned and Sanford with a reader that overworks themselves. Prioritizing work over mental and physical health, pushing themselves to their breaking point, skipping meals and only getting a few hours of sleep. I just need these four in particular to tell me to take care of myself and care about me argggh

Overworked reader

Audi, Phobos, Doc, Sanford

CW: bit of a mental spiral on San's end, ends well tho.

Burnouts a bitch man, don't wear yourself thin over shit, y'hear?

Auditor

"Are the chef's meals not to your liking?" You nearly jumped out of your seat when Auditor's ghostly whisper filled your ear. Casting your aching, tired eyes from your paperwork at the once hot meal, still arranged with care on the plate, completely untouched from the moment it left the kitchen.

"Oh, no. Of course not. They're good, don't worry." You offered him a weak smile. "I'll have it later, I just need to finish this up." Audi's eyes narrowed as you gestured meekly to your desk, piled high with reports, cloning records, casualty tallies, and other such boring admin work.

"It's cold." He grumbled, spinning your chair to face him, hands on his hips. "You're going to really hurt yourself and burn out if you keep pulling these awkward hours. Don't think I haven't noticed you slipping from our bed to come back to this. Did you forget how light a sleeper I am?"

Audi's stern demeanour dropped as your features fell, already feeling low because of how your body was struggling, now having your boss/lover add to that. "I just need to be able to keep up with you. What use am I really if I can't handle a fraction of the work you do?"

His hand rested under your chin, thumb delicately stroking your cheek. "You could never keep up with me, my flame, I was made to handle this. You're just a delicate mortal, you do more than enough without stressing yourself trying to level with me. Allow me to finish this later, mea vita, you are going to get a hot, fresh meal while I draw a bath for us, and after you will get the rest your body needs. That's an order, from your employer, understood?"

"Yes, but-"

He cut you off. "No 'ifs, ands, or buts,' You are going to hurt yourself, and I refuse to allow anyone to hurt you, even self inflicted pain. I, as your partner and boss, will clear this burden for you. When I asked for your best, I meant the best you can consistently handle, not this. You're not yourself, and I command you seek out that old self that I fell for and bring them back to me instantly."

Phobos

Being the director's lover had essentially no downsides, nobody spoke a bad word around you, people helped you far more than before, not to mention the adoration of the most powerful figure in the physical realm. However, that same man would often breathe down your neck, commanding you to stay by his side constantly.

Phobos relished in you, watching you, listening to you, being around you. He wished to be adored equally in return, however your work proved to be a distraction from him. He was... a tad obsessive, but how could he not be? He's a god, it was only right you'd devote yourself to him and him alone.

"Leave that alone will you? Your god requires your attention." A large clawed hand rested on your shoulder, the other pulling down his bandages from his mouth. "Your recent neglect of me is not going unnoticed, dear."

You rubbed your aching eyes, staring at a computer screen all day and most of the night irritated them. "I'm sorry Bo, but there's a lot of work that needs reviewing, I've got weeks of backlog to go through, and Christoff, Crackpot and Gonne have all submitted new reports today with pages and pages of intel to go through."

His hands wrapped around your middle, he lifted you up and took your place on the chair, resting you in his far more comfortable lap. "Bah, they're not worthy of your time. I'll command someone else to do it, the short fat one, whatever his name is. He enjoys paperwork and the like."

"Hofnarr is no doubt as swamped as I am." He took your face in one of his hands, his cracked and damaged lips pressing against your cheek.

"Someone else then, if it pleases you. Whatever it takes for you to spend time with me." You leaned into him, your back pressing against his chest, and he emitted a deep purr. "I am a god amongst men, dear, I don't beg for what I desire. I take it. And yet I allow you this honour. So please..."

Your stomach rumbled against his hand. "Harumph! Neglecting yourself as much as you've neglected me?! How dare you, enough is enough. I command you take care of yourself!" Phobos picked you up with ease, holding you level to his eye. To anyone else, he'd be holding them by their collar, or neck to meet his gaze, but with you, he was softer. A hand under your rump and the other on your back, supporting your weight comfortably.

"You are the lover of a god, think how pitiful it would look if I can't even take care of my equal? You stand above others, the right hand of my throne. Your duties have changed, lesser beings will take charge of them. Your only priorities are yourself and me, and the family we will create." Phobos snapped his fingers, and one of the guards at the door came forward.

"See to it that the chefs prepare your God's favourites, find someone to take their duties on and allow them to be truly indulged as they should be." Phobos looked back to you, his eye narrowing. "I will tear this world asunder for you, and build it up as you desire. I will give you anything your heart pines for, never again shall you be run ragged like this."

Phobos was self assured, a god of the highest order, surrounded by weaker, lesser beings. And yet here he was, begging at your altar. He wished you'd devote yourself equally to worshipping you as he did, and he would make damn sure that happened.

2BDamned

3 AM. Doc was in the kitchen, boiling some water over the stove. Hank has smashed the coffee maker earlier in the day, said he'd accidentally dropped the thing, yet couldn't explain the crowbar in his hands. Doc gritted his teeth, damn Wimbleton, making his hard job harder with their stupid thoughtless actions.

He had no doubt the fool had burned themselves on the machine and gone overboard against the poor helpless thing in revenge. Now here he stood, using the stove to make both his coffee and his snack. Instant noodles, his saving grace in the world. Easy to prepare, quick to eat, and filling.

With bleary, tired eyes, you wandered into the dim kitchen, hearing Doc grumbling to himself about 'Getting that moron to find another working machine or he'll have his spine inserted upside down next time.'

"Hey sweetheart." Yawning and setting your tablet down, you wrapped your arms around his midriff and leaned your face into his back. One hand pulled way from the stove, running down your arm before resting atop your hand, feeling the ring around your finger.

"You should be asleep, love." Doc murmured, his animosity towards Hank gone in the wind. You inhaled deeply, basking in his familiar scent.

"I could say the same to you, Kyle." He let out a soft 'Hm.', agreeing without agreeing. You were right, of course. "Debugging with Dei was going well, till he nodded off. San came by on one of his usual bathroom breaks and picked him up."

Doc poured the water into his noodle cup. "You want some coffee?" He took your favourite mug out of the cupboard.

"I thought you wanted me to sleep." You teased tiredly.

"You're my spouse. I know you well enough to know that's not gonna happen anytime soon, even if I would like it if you did." He tossed some powdered milk into the cups along with the beans. "We don't have any sugar left I'm afraid, or sweetener. It's become so scarce these days. Ration packages can't even supply a tiny packet anymore."

"I can get sugar anytime I've got you around." Doc smiled and turned off the hob, turning around to pull you into his arms. "Can I get some now?"

As far as you two were concerned, nothing else existed, everything except what was in both your arms was null and void. He tilted his head down slightly, lips catching yours softly. Butterflies fluttered in your tummy, they flared up every time your husband kissed you.

You rested your head on his chest, it was rare you two had a truly private moment together, as much as you both tried. Being enemies of the state was hard work, who'd have thought?

"You should really lay down dear." Your eyes fluttered open, and you looked up to him. You hadn't even realised you'd started dozing off in his arms.

"No, I've got work to do." You yawned, and Doc chuckled softly.

"You're really stubborn sometimes, you know that?" He picked up both coffees and his noodles. "Tell you what, grab your tablet and we can get cosy in bed together. Work can wait until later, I think we've overdue some private couple time."

Nestled in the crook of Doc's arm felt like the safest place in the world, even with coffee in your system, you couldn't help but fall asleep with him. Trust and love deep rooted, he was your sanctuary.

And damn it, he was going to get you into a healthier sleep routine.

Sanford

It'd been a couple weeks since you'd seen Ford, Doc had sent him off on recon work with Deimos and a splinter group from a faction allied with the SQ, they'd been on the other side of Nevada having heard whispering of something dangerous settling out there.

Two weeks of silence left you anxious, pacing around often, skipping meals and staying up into the early hours of the morning. Longing makes the heart sick, and a sick heart makes the body weak.

The only think you could do to keep your mind occupied was cleaning out the gun stash, checking over the stocked rounds repeatedly, despite the numbers never changing, cleaning already dirt and grime free steel.

A scrubbing brush in hand, you scraped at one of the many swords Hank had salvaged, violently jolting the bristles back and forth over either rust, or really crusted on blood just above the hilt.

Doc usually kept you in the loop of long jobs, sometimes you'd even be in walkie talkie range of your partner and could hear his voice. He could be hurt, he could be dead, you'd be none the wiser, and that was maddening.

Of course you weren't needy and dependant on him, that'd be too much, but just a sign he was okay would've been enough to give you peace of mind. It's the not knowing that drove you to dark places.

Bang!

You jumped in your seat as the front door slammed. "Baby, you here? I'm back." Dropping the blade, you got to you feet and rushed to the door.

"Sanford, you're okay?!" You leaped into his arms, and he caught you easily. Oh sweet security, your world had come home to you safely.

"Yeah babe," San leaned back slightly to get a good look at you, his loving gaze turning to concern. "uh, hope you don't mind me sayin' doll/stud, but you look like hell." His hands brushed over your hair. "...When did you last shower?"

Suddenly you felt rather embarrassed, it'd been a.... couple days at least. Probably about a week since you'd stopped properly taking care of yourself. Swapping meals out for multiple junk snacks, a fucked up sleeping schedule consisting of occasional naps but mostly anxious pacing and activity.

"Uhm..." That was an answer enough for him.

"Baby," Sanford rubbed his cheek, clearing off some dust from his face. "you need to take care of yourself." He sighed and took off his sunglasses. "Have you even been eating properly?"

You didn't meet his gaze. "Okay. Tell you what," He took off his dirty tank top and tossed it aside. "I'll pull out something from the freezer, shove it in the oven while we get a nice shower, and then we can eat and get some rest." Just being near him, hearing his melodic voice again was enough to bring you to a sense of normalcy.

Sanford was fine, he was alive, he was here.

"Things have just been a bit... off without you." You sighed, clinging to his frame, almost afraid if you let him go, he'd run off for another two weeks, or longer. "Sorry, it's just been a lot to deal with, not knowing where you were, if you were safe... It's been hard."

"I get it. I do, I really do," Sanford had his own experiences with deep depression, despite being the large stoic type, the horrors of war, what he and his friends had to do to get an advantage against everything haunted him. "fight, flight, freeze is a real thing, but you can't just shut down baby. You gotta keep fightin, keep yourself in good shape 'cause it's a scary world out there."

"I know. It's easier said than done though." Sanford pulled out a tray of his legendary frozen mac n cheese, you hadn't checked the freezer since he'd left, otherwise that would've been long gone. You didn't know how he did it, but it was godly each time he made it.

"I get that." He shoved the tray into the oven, flicking switches to heat up the frozen dish. "You gotta change how you think, baby." You watched him take off his bandanna, revealing his hair. Or lack thereof.

"You shaved your head?" Usually he'd grow out his hair, style it into long locs and keep them tied back and under his bandanna, but once in a blue moon he'd get bored of maintaining them, and shave it off to start again.

Sanford ran a hand over his scalp, feeling the small curls starting to reappear. "Yeah, easier than trying to keep it clean out there. Dusty as hell." His hands came to rest on your shoulders, turning you to the bathroom. "No bother, I've got your hair to care for now. I'mma spoil you rotten."

Years of caring for his baby siblings had taught the beefcake that just telling someone what to do usually didn't help, but doing it along side them helped solidify the action. He'd help you get cleaned up, get back to eating proper food and getting proper sleep.

He needed to fall into the routine too, sleeping rough in trucks was a pain in his back, and access to his comfy old bed would do him wonders to getting decent sleep again. A full belly and his favourite person in the entire world cuddling into his pecs definitely helped too.

Yes, he needed this just as much as you did.

[headlessjest]

How about some romantic stuff!! Some of y'all need your romance.

Hanging out HCs

Ft: Hank, Deimos, Sanford, Jedediah, Tricky, Sheriff, 2BDamned, Phobos, and Auditor.

Hank:

・I think y'all would probably just stay home.

・You both just had a very stressful mission, so why not relax back at the apartment.

・They'll probably watch TV with you with the few tv stations Nevada can have.

・Cuddling is something he can do with you too. Just on bed or on the couch and just cuddle.

・There will be a couple times where he just lays on the ground with you and wonder what the hell happened to this place.

・"(Name)... Thank you.."

Deimos:

・Going out and eating Burger Gil's!

・Deimos just wants to enjoy his favorite food place with you.

・This can also be an excuse to to eat at Gil's in general, but it's nice to do it with you.

・When y'all are done at eating at Gil's, maybe a quick trip to the bakery.

・He threw up the Burger Gil's on the way there so you had to carry him back home.

・"That burger was sure good, but you're just as good."

Sanford:

���Alright, endless stary night, blanket, and you two. That's how it's gonna go.

・Just you two hanging out on a hill and looking up on the stary night, relaxing.

・There will be a few times bandits will try and get you two, but that's why y'all brought guns to this evening.

・Other than getting interrupted by bandits and a couple of zeds, this hangout is wonderful for the both of you.

・You accidentally fell asleep during this, but Sanford didn't mind carrying you back.

・"Thank you for this time, sweetie.."

Jedediah:

・Going scavenger hunting.

・Jedediah surprisingly enjoys collecting stuff. It calms him down, and doing it with you makes him extra calm.

・You'll probably find a old coin or a rock with a cool texture and look to it and dash back to Jeb to show him.

・He also sometimes finds cool looking rocks and gives them to you. Like penguins.

・After going around and finding some cool stuff, you and Jeb head back home and organize all the stuff you both found.

・"These are beautiful, darling.. Just like you."

Tricky:

・Y'all go partying.

・I think y'all would also listen to your both favorite songs when partying. (His being all ICP songs and the chicken dance remix.)

・I think after the partying stuff is over with, y'all kinds just head back home and relax after the long night.

・If you get overwhelmed at the party, Tricky will notice and try to find a way to calm you down.

・Other than that y'all actually have a great time.

・"CL0WN L0V3S Y0U!!!1!1!"

Sheriff:

・I think y'all would hang out at a nice bar. (If possible that is..)

・I think he took you to the bar in the first place because it was the easiest place to go without him freaking the fuck out and being horrified.

・Also, because he's been busy lately and wanted to spend time with you.

・He might also get a little drunk from drinking too much.

・You also had to drag him back home.

・"Darlin'... When do you get so beautiful/handsome?"

2BDamned:

・Y'all also stay home.

・He just wants to relax with you and just hang out in bed. Nothing much really.

・He also is just a little stressed with everything, so relaxing with you seems like a perfect thing for the time being.

・I think y'all would also watch a quick movie for fun. Like a older movie from the later 90s and early 2000s.

・Other than that, relaxing with you makes his day better, no matter what.

・"This means a lot to me, (Name).. Thank you.."

Phobos:

・I think he would dance with in his office.

・The red lighten room and the slow jazz playing in the background, just you two slow dancing for the joy of it.

・Phobos made sure that no one would bother you both during this. I mean, quite literally.

・I think during this, you might doze off a bit from the slow atmosphere.

・Phobos does notice this and y'all get ready for bed.

・"Tonight was lovely.. We should do this again.."

Auditor:

・I think y'all just hang out and watch cat videos all night long.

・Most romantic thing I've ever heard.

・I think you both would also hold eachothers hand during too. Auditors love language is physical touch. (Somehow..)

・Another thing is that whenever you both see a cat that reminded of you both, you would point it out.

・This also made you both question about getting a cat.

・"Hm, a fur baby seems nice."

I'm absolutely shaking rn. Ate an entire tub of coffee icecream, also mixed with the excitement of watching the fnaf movie tomorrow!!!!

-Jester

[skibidimadness]

Hey, so I'm making a main 4 x human reader, I'm getting back into madness combat, but i need to figure out how not to make this shit cringe

(it probably gonna be cringe and the prologue is probably cringed as fuck already)

So, should i make the story that follows madness project nexus or the series

You decide for me

You can reply or reblog to maybe help me, give some headcanons... if you want to

[lampshade-s]

his reaction looked like my pfp

Streamer player who got into the game with their phone and aren't exactly behaving the way the employers expected them to at first💥

Auditor goes on his little monologue about you being important to this entire reality and how you being locked up in here is non-negotiable and how you can't just leave! They finally got you here and they're so excited-

Player is giving no visual reactions but he keeps on talking (he. Is acting a bit out of pocket now that the player is finally here! You can't blame him!!!)

Then suddently they just kinda.

Player is now visibly irritated and typing up a longgg post abt them having to stop streaming for now and how they love their fans and won't stop interacting!!! It will just take longer to post significant content! And apologising profusely to their followers.

As they're doing this they start a very upset rant about the situation they're in

Like they go all the way off💥💥 going from how badly planned their kidnapping was and how if they really wanted the player to stay in this bland little concrete room the employers should have at the very least let them grab a charger. Did they even know if humans could breathe in this atmosphere?? They could have died! Did they even take their medication with them? No? Of course not. God, can it even get any worse? Oh! And just so you know, being locked in a small boring enviroment is very detrimental to any human's mental state! Do they even know if food in nevada can fit their dietary requirements?? If the auditor didn't go on that rant about the importance of the player, they'd assume they were captured to get tortured! If this is the level of planning the employers were capable of, then they could see why they couldn't catch Hank yet.

40 minutes after being left in the room by themselves the player gets out and they apologize for getting so mad.🫡

(What the rest of the employers see after the auditor leaves the player's room)

Omg, it's something the Employers never expected to see. The consequences of their own actions. 🤯

Yes, we love to see the Player sticking it to the Auditor (and the rest of the Employers), and they do have a point. Besides the observations they made over your webcam, they had no other source of information on humans, and it's not like watching someone play video games and go about their business in their room can tell you about all their needs. Your biology is completely unfamiliar to them, and who knows if you need any specialized medical care to deal with any disorders or ailments you have? Like if you were diabetic, how the hell would you get insulin? Do they even have insulin in Nevada? What about food? Or enrichment? Humans are social creatures, and it's not like talking only to the four of them would be sufficient for that. And that's just a few things in addition to the arguments you gave in your ask as well.

I like to think that the Player is just so done with the situation that they're the one who orders the Auditor to leave the room while they type out a message to their followers. I mean, they just woke up in a whole other dimension/world after being kidnapped. It's not like they'd be all that comfortable with just chilling in the room with the Auditor after giving him the verbal lashing they did lmao. 

Meanwhile, the Employer is just beside himself, because he can't exactly weasel his way out of responsibility here or argue against what the Player said - because they're right. The Auditor took a major gamble by really just assuming they would be able to survive there off of some similar details in their surroundings, and if he were any less impulsive, he'd have done some further tests to see if such a thing was really feasible.

What makes it worse for him is that I'm also willing to bet that Stygian or one of the other Employers suggested doing just that, but he didn't listen to them because he never listens to them lmao. (Also I love that picture of the Auditor, it's one of my favorite things in the world now, no joke.) 

And it's not like they're going to comfort or support him once he steps out of the room either. In fact, they'll probably chastise him (Stygian totally would at least), and then insist that you were entirely right and they don't think you should apologize at all. 

Maybe they're doing it for extra brownie points, as the Auditor's clear fuckup in your eyes provides a very good opportunity to make themselves look good (even if it's extremely hypocritical lol). But then you reference their own work to help the Auditor's plan and throw it back in their faces because you just know he could never do this whole operation alone. (And you're still important to other people besides them regardless, like your beloved fans who're gonna have to deal with the fallout of their selfishness.)

However, fortunately for the other three, your scolding is far less harsh than it had been on the Auditor. That doesn't mean you won't still make a point of it when necessary though.

[the-ganymedian]

Madness combat requests idfk

Requests: Open

Since I'm currently STARVING for madcom x reader content (*cough*Deimos*cough*) I have decided to take matters into my own hands

Masterlist

What I will do

I'll do drawings, headcanons, oneshots, alphabets and multiple parts stories but don't expect these to be good OR quickly done since this is my first time writing and I am the queen of procrastination

Disclaimer: If you specifically want headcanons or a oneshot, it would be preferable to mention it in the request so I can be sure.

•Fluff

•Platonic

•Crack/shitpost

•Heavy angst

•Gore, blood

•Suggestive

•Gendered readers IF their gender is relevant to the story

What I won't do

•P*dophilia, inc*st, toxic/abusive relationships, r*pe, etc

•Transphobia, homophobia, racism, sexism, etc

•Explicit smut

What I'll TRY to do

•AU's

•Polyamory

Characters I won't write for (everyone else is probably valid)

•Mental or physical conditions

•Trans reader

•ROMP.FLA

•OC's

-------------------thank you!-------------------

[outhereinnevada]

Could I please request some fluff/smut with Auditor? Thank u

WOOOO! Alright, time for the first NSFW fic!

Warning: NSFW content ahead. Minors DO NOT INTERACT.

Anyways, onto the fic! Enjoy anon!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Relieving love - Auditor x Reader Smut

You've known the Auditor for as long as you can remember. Long before Nevada was thrown into madness.

When he founded the AAHW, he made you his second in command knowing that you had very similar ideals to him. If he was out and taking the day off, you would be put in charge.

The Agents and Engineers really loved having you around, you always made sure that they were well taken care of, especially the MAGS. The MAGS really enjoy just holding you in their hands to talk to you about whatever they had their minds on.

Auditor was very appreciative for your hard work in his absence and loved that you took the time to make the Agents and Engineers feel welcomed and readied in the AAHW. You were essentially a therapist for them.

------------------------------------------------

Another rough day for Auditor, a lot of shit went down. Hank and his crew raided the base that the Auditor was at that day, very few got out alive, but he finally got home. Closing the door a bit harshly, he sat down on the couch with his head in his hands, obviously stressed out.

"Auditor? Are you alright dear?"

He looked up to see you crouched in front of him, you took his hands into yours feeling the tension he radiated. He sighed, letting himself calm at your touch.

"It was another rough day, the base I was at got raided by Hank and his lot. Very few of us got out of there, a lot of casualties."

With a soft gasp, you placed a hand on his cheek. He nuzzled into it, putting his own hand on top of yours.

"Oh Audi...thank goodness you weren't harmed. I don't what I would do without you."

His body heated up, he adored when you used that nickname. The flames around his body got a little more wild.

"s/o...you know I get flustered when you call me that."

You giggled, sitting next to him, you threaded your fingers around his flames playfully. He kept getting more and more heated until he snapped. He turned to you and gripped your wrists, your surprised, blushing expression staring right at him.

"Audi?! Wha-what are you-"

He quickly cut you off, seeming incredibly desperate for some reason.

"I-I'm sorry s/o, I c-can't stop myself anymore. You're just too irresistible."

You stared into his loving gaze, you knew what he wanted, what he needed at this moment. You gave soft smile before slipping out of his grip and giggling. Shocked, he turned his tomato red face toward you.

"Well, you'll just have to catch me then!"

Not wasting a second, you ran around the house. Auditor catching onto what you're doing, got up and started to playfully chase you. You ran around for a bit before running into your shared bedroom and jumping onto the bed, with Auditor following your actions and landing beside you.

You two laughed for awhile before Auditor got back into his previous mood, his body once again heating up. Hovering over you, his hands placed beside your head he leaned closer to you. Your face now turning more red from how close he was.

"Caught you~"

His voice became huskier, a sign that he became needy. You looked away shyly, burying your head into your arm.

"W-well, here's your prize then."

He chuckled, you knew you were in good hands with that laugh.

"Oh darling, you're in for a treat tonight~"

He gently pulled your arm away from your face and brushed your hair away from your face.

"I wouldn't want anything less~"

That set Auditor off, he leaned in to give a brief kiss on your lips before slowly moving to your neck. The light licks on your neck gave you sudden chills before he started to lightly nibble and suck on it, giving you hickeys.

"Au-Audi."

You let out a soft moan indicating your pleasure. He decided to take it a step further and really bite down. A sharp gasp emanated from your submissive form.

"AAH, please...a bit more gentle."

He reeled back a bit. Noticing, you put a hand on his shoulder to reassure him.

"I apologise s/o. I'll a bit more gentle for you."

You kissed his cheek, a sign to keep going. He kept biting and sucking on your neck, trying to find your sweet spot. A yelp from you signalled that he found it.

Continuing to abuse your sweet spot, he snaked his hand up your stomach to your chest. You raked your fingers through the flames atop his head, your breaths hot and heavy.

He chuckled heartily at your flushed expression, proceeding to toy with your breasts as he left a few more hickeys on your neck. You decided he need some pleasure too, you lifted your leg to grind against his crotch. He let out a subtle groan, his face coated in red.

"Oh~ You want to play that game do you my love? Very well."

You didn't even notice that your shirt and bra were gone, before you could respond he started to nibble and suck on one of your breasts and massaging the other with his hand. The bliss was too much for you, you became putty within The Auditor's hands.

"P-please, I-I need you more. Just-jus-."

You couldn't finish your sentence as you let out another lustful moan.

"I could make you wait longer, but that would just be cruel of me~ So let's just get to the point."

You smirked, getting an idea. Before he could try anything, you flipped him over putting him on the bottom. You revelled in his shocked expression.

"Sorry dear, but I believe that you need some attention as well."

You quickly unzipped his pants and pull down his boxers, letting his cock spring up, the tip leaking with anticipation. You ogled at the grand size of it. You gently laid your fingers on the shaft, even the lightest touch got Auditor worked up.

"Wow, you really were holding out for me weren't you?"

Letting out warm, shaky breaths, he gripped onto your shoulders. You rubbed the inside of his thighs before pressing your soft lips against the head of his length, lightly sucking on it. Auditor gripped the sheets hard out of the sheer amount of satisfaction he was receiving.

"Ke-Keep going, you're doing so wonderfully-"

Multiple whimpers and moans escaped him, interrupting himself. This only prompted you to go down on him properly. Slowly taking more of his member each time he let out even a single noise, you pumped whatever you couldn't fit in your mouth.

The Auditor was in absolute ecstasy, he could barely speak. Your tongue swirled around the shaft as if you had done this many times before. You had taken in so much that it was hitting the back of your throat and you started to choke and gag.

"s-s/o. I-I'm-AGHH!"

Without warning, Auditor shot his load deep into your throat with a strained groan. You tried your best to swallow every drop of his seed as to not make a mess on the sheets. Finally ceasing, you released his cock from your mouth with a satisfying pop.

"Goodness, you...you were really pent-up. That was a lot to swallow."

Gazing into your tired eyes, he laughed to himself. He flipped you back to bottom position, a hungry look in his crimson gaze.

"I don't believe we're done yet, since you so rudely interrupted me when I was trying to please you."

He swiftly removed your pants along with your panties, he wiped two fingers on your opening rubbing his fingers together taking note of the wetness.

"Hmm, already soaking wet and I've barely done anything to you. Let's fix that shall we~"

Plunging the two fingers deep into your slit, he scissored you wide open to prep you for the ravaging he was about to give you. You tried to hide your increasingly high-pitched moans but the pleasure was just too much to keep quiet about.

"I hope you're ready s/o because once I start, I won't stop until I'm satisfied."

The threatening but alluring tone of Auditor's voice sent you into a downward spiral of lust and want. Removing his fingers, he lined himself up to insert himself into you. Leaning closer, he could feel how hot your breath was against his skin.

"Please...be gentle, it-it's my first time and feel it might break me if you go too hard and fast."

He caressed your cheek, giving you a gentle kiss. He rubbed the tip of his shaft against your entrance seeming eager to pop your cherry seeing as he was your first.

"Don't worry, I'll make sure you aren't harmed. That is a promise."

You nodded, slowly but surely he pushed his way into you. With every bit of his length that pressed in, you let out a strained but pleasured whimper. Finally hilting himself within you, the tears finally ran down your cheeks. He tenderly wiped away the tears and rested his forehead against yours, awaiting your signal to go.

After a couple of minutes, you shifted and a sultry whine was your response. Given the all clear, Auditor wasted no time getting into a rhythmic pattern. You wrapped your arms around him tightly, nails scratching his back which only made him speed up. Your lewd yelps and screams were music to his ears.

"Yes, keep screaming my dear, let me know that I'm giving you what's rightfully yours!"

You were tightening around his member by the second, each thrust leaving you seeing stars. Not wanting to be the only one, you bit down his neck and started leaving your own hickeys on him though they wouldn't be as noticeable as yours.

Your body trembled against his, his movements were getting slower and sloppier. You couldn't hold it in anymore and he neither could he.

"AUDI!"

"S/O!"

At the call of each others names, you both released, there was so much cum that it leaked out of you, so much for not making a mess. Finally coming down from your highs, he pulled out seeing all of the excess fluid, he quickly cleaned you and himself before pulling a thick blanket over the both of you. You buried yourself into Auditor's side as he flopped down next to you, snaking an arm around you to pull you close to his radiating warmth.

"That...that was amazing."

"I agree, you did incredibly well for your first time. I'm proud of you."

You giggled as he planted a kiss on the top of your head, petting your head as he lulled you into a peaceful sleep before falling asleep himself.

"Goodnight s/o, may your dreams be pleasant tonight."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

WOOOOOOOOOOO! FIRST NSFW FIC IS DONE! I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS ANON CUZ I SURE DID.

[distressedwalnut]

Funny based off a post I saw

[cosmica-galaxy]

Marriage headcanons for Phobos and the Auditor (separately ofc) and the player? I love evil men ough

+Player is gender neutral

+Set in Salty's AU

--

~ PHOBOS ~

+ Oh man, you never thought you would see the day that you would be wedded to the god-complex tyrant that ruled over Nexus City with an iron fist. It was astonishing that you two were getting married in the first place with how Phobos proposed after just a few months of being together. Despite the short time, you both almost know everything about one another...until now. Finding out that Phobos is an ultimate groomzilla was certainly not unexpected, but it still held some level of surprise. He wants everything absolutely perfect for your special ceremony.

+ You can practically hear him yelling at his staff to perfect everything while you get dressed up in your wedding garments. His shouting is firm and sharp as the staff runs around to get what he wants done just the way he likes it. "Hang those red ribbons HIGH and tie them down with a GOLD thread! Not a YELLOW thread!! GET THE CAKE STAND READY! Where is the flower display I ordered 3 minutes ago?!"

+ You can only apologize to the staff and underlings for Phobo's behavior. He's been looking forward to being married to a "higher god" ever since you accepted his proposal. He ordered everything that same day and sent out the announcement the day after that. To say he was excited would be an understatement. He's just trying to make this day as perfect as possible.

+ Phobos even had new clothes and special garments made for the both of you. Your wedding gown was as iridescent as your strings are and glitters with sparkles whenever you walked. Quite a surprise to find out where all of those strings the tailors asked you to supply went towards. It really was an elegant outfit.

+ Phobo's outfit really did make him look rather handsome. Instead of his typical gray garments and red cape, Phobo's had a unique crimson suit made for his wedding. Tailored with a long flowing red cape that touched the floor wherever he walked. his helmet was fitted with much more regal markings and his face was sporting new pairs of pristine white bandages. His gloves were leathery and black and his dark boots were shined to perfection. He looked like an emperor alright.

+ By the time all of the underlings were seated and the musicians were preparing to play the wedding march, which you had to supply to them, the long hall in the science tower was finished and decorated. The large crowds of grunts filled out numerous booths on both sides of the isle, with Phobos standing at his place on the altar. Crackpot his best madman and Hoffnar as yours. Jeb was dressed up in attire fit for a holy man, but with much more regal tones added to his outfit. The reason being, in Phobos's words: "Something much more worthy of marrying a pair of gods." + The crowd was excited and Phobos, despite all of his own excitement, was nervous. Anxious, even. As he moved about on his feet and held his hands together. Then, the music changes and the wedding officially begins. The doors at the end of the room are opened by two Blackguards, a bit much on the security but it makes Phobos feel more comfortable, revealing his beloved in their glittering wedding outfit. The crowds watch in awe as the Player walks down the aisle and towards Phobos who is just lovestruck.

+ The moment you get up there, the ceremony continues. Jeb goes into the typical speech about why they were all there and who was being wedded. (Like the announcement from Phobos himself didn't let them know that.) But he continues on about uniting Phobos and his Player in "holier matrimony. (Yes, the sheet tells him to say this.)

+ "Do you, Player, take Phobos to be your...ahem..."lawfully empowered godly emperor lover"?" In sanity and insanity? In sickness and in health? Until death do you part?" You nod earnestly, despite trying not to laugh. "I do." You say and Jeb turns to Phobos.

+ "And do you, Director Phobos, take Player to be your...uhh..."lawfully empowered god-amongst-gods holy lover"?", Phobos merely nods in response. "I do." He finalizes.

+ "Then by the power given to me and to all who bear witness to this ceremony, I declare these two 'gods' officially wedded. You may now seal it with a kiss." Jeb finishes as he steps down from the podium, placing their respective wedding rings upon their fingers, and allowing the two lovers to lean in and kiss each other. A thunderous applause rings out in the crowd as you both kiss under the altar.

+ Phobos then picks you up bridal-style and begins to head towards the exit as the after-wedding party begins to kick into gear. The cake needed to be cut, photos needed to be taken, and guests needed to be visited.

+ After the drinks, fun, and party...maybe you and Phobos can celebrate being newly wedded...alone later on tonight~ ~ AUDITOR ~

+ In all honesty, you were quite surprised when the Auditor himself decided to propose to you. He had read up about special ceremonies from your world and he was looking for a way to up your relationship to the ‘next level’. In which, he discovered weddings. You both have been together for months now, and he felt it was time to bind you both to one another. + Obviously, you said yes in response to his proposal and he was elated to announce the news to his other Employers. Whether it was from genuine happiness or he simply took the opportunity to gloat on his fellow employers is a mystery to you. But regardless, you can’t help but smile as he nuzzles you affectionately. + The employers as a whole are very private beings, so don’t really expect a big wedding. If anything, it’s something more of a private wedding that only a select few outsiders would attend. The other employers were a given, but it seemed that Jeb, Hoffnar, Sheriff, and a few A.T.P units were invited to help set up the wedding and attend the ceremony. + The Auditor assists in the displays and decorations while you go off to get dressed up in your wedding outfit. The garments were fitted in a unique style and glittered like an ocean at sunset. With the help of an A.T.P engineer, you were fitted up in the unique outfit and took a nice long look at yourself in the mirror. It was so strange…the patterned themselves reminded you of flames. You spin around and sure enough, the tail of your outfit seems to flutter about like iridescent flames. You wonder if the Auditor had any influence when the garments were being tailored…you wouldn’t be all that surprised. + The Auditor didn’t really have a need for clothes. He was made of shadow and flames, what purpose would wearing clothes fulfill? Still…he guesses he should look a little bit more…’formal’, it IS his wedding day, after all. So, his body simply morphs around until a much more fitting suit is applied to his malleable form. A crimson red tie, a blood red broach, and a faint red outline shows up in his form as he brushes himself off and checks his fit in a nearby reflective surface. Making adjustments and final preparations for his eventual eloping. + There weren't many guests, but the sheer amount of decorations that were set up in this specific dimension that they frequent was staggering. Each one unique and alien as the employer that put them up. The Deliberator was finishing setting up the cake stand and the dinner table, Stygian was finishing up decorating the parlor, and the Conductor was preparing to play the tunes that the Auditor gave him (the wedding march tune, specifically.). Everything was in order and the unification of him and his precious player was underway. Pretty soon…he and his Player would be together. Truly together. + Jeb was appointed as the unifier, Hoffnar as your best man, Sheriff as security, and Torture was pretty much Audi’s “support”. The altar that they surrounded was encrusted in ruby-like gems and held up on familiar black spikes. An obvious token of the Auditor's influence on the importance of the altar. Once all were present and accounted for, the Auditor takes his place at the altar and his kin stand at the sides, watching as the Conductor begins to play the wedding march. + The two engineers next to the door that led into the special room finally opened, revealing his Player to the small gathering of trusted individuals. The Auditor could feel the heat of his flames rise as he took in your regal appearance as you walked toward the altar. Once you arrive at the altar, he takes his place by your side and Jeb clears his throat. He didn’t need to go into the whole speech, he merely took a moment to welcome those that were present before announcing that the Auditor and Player would be wedded on this day. + “Do you, Player, take The Auditor as your lawfully unified lover? In sanity and insanity? In sickness and in health? Until death do you part?” You could only smile and nod, holding your flowers closer to your body in response. “I do.” You say. + “And do you, Auditor, take Player as your lawfully unified lover? In sanity and insanity? In sickness and in health? Until death do you part?” The Auditor simply nods in confirmation. “I do.” + “Then by the power bestowed upon me and with the guests as our witnesses, I declare you both wedded! You may now seal it with a kiss.” You both wasted no time in slipping your rings onto your fingers and leaning into one another. Giving each other a slow and meaningful kiss. The onlookers clap in earnest as you both hold onto one another and pull away. You let out a puff of inky black smoke in response to the kiss. The Auditor could only nuzzle you affectionately in response, chuckling under his smoky breath. + The rest of the day was spent eating cake, sharing drinks, and enjoying your new status as the Auditor’s significant other. As he too, takes pride in becoming your official husband. You both would embrace one another, cuddle, and nuzzle each other lovingly as the wedding slowly concluded and the guests began to dispatch back to their routines. + Later that evening, you both would cuddle in your bed and call one another your newly wedded titles and feel the shared warmth that spread between you both. Now nothing stood in the way of furthering your relationship…and the Auditor has a rather interesting plan in mind.

[verylostkirukunstuff]

Manipulated or Obsessed ?

[abstract-crossverse]

"Madness Day 2022" [Various x Reader, fic, either platonic or romantic, its up for interpretation]

===============================

Another say, another Madness is what youd tell yourself, and today was a somewhat special day, since it celebrated the day Madness came to Nevada

Well... It wasnt particularly celebration, as it sounds wrong to celebrate a day where many were killed ruthlessly, dont you think?

I guess... Think of it as a day everyone takes a day off, a holiday of sorts, where you all take a break from the constant bloodshed, even the AAHW would take a break from searching for Hank

That is if Hank or Tricky don't get bored enough to kill today. Which thankfully hasnt happened during this day in all the years Nevada has been the warzone it constantly is

It was also surprising because the Clown didnt bother killing anyone today either, nor did it pick a fight with Hank whenever they crossed ways, seems like it made a truce with Hank just for these days in specific

In fact, said Clown was currently sitting on your thorn couch, shaking wildly as always, you and the Four men you lived with standing in front of the clown as it looked up at you, eyes snapping between each as it waited for someone to say anything, bouncing its leg rapidly

You, Sanford and Deimos pretty much had the same stare of confusion, Deimos lit another cigarette with his thumb, taking a drag of it before blowing the smoke to the side. Hank glared at rhe clown, though you could feel the same amount of confusion in his glare

He had a truce with Tricky, and as much as he wanted to thow it out of his home, they promised each other that they wouldnt cause physical damage to each other as long as the other didnt inniate combat, the clown was a violent being but at least it stuck to its word, and Hank really didnt feel like being thrown around today, it was one o lf the rare days he could actually relax

Doc let out an aggravated sigh, rubbing his facial cross under his mask

"Clown, what are you doing here?" He questioned, arms crossed under his chest as the hand rubbing his face would limp to the side, palm up

"CLOWN WANTS TO SPEND MADNESS DAY WITH CLOWN'S FRIEND!!" it yelled, leaning forward slightly as happiness laced its glitchy voice

"we're- not your friends though--" Sanford spoke, though being rudely interrupted by the clown

"NOT YOU FOUR, DUMMY. [NAME]! THEY'RE CLOWN'S FRIEND!! :oD" it pointed at you, which made the others look at you in a small amount of shock, Hank glared at you even harder, you almost felt like he felt betrayed

"... Dont look at me like that, he's a cool guy to hang out with if hes not trying to kill people-" you crossed your arms and looked off to the side

they deadpanned at you, they knew you probably didnt mean to friend the clown, as they knew anyone who showed it kindness a few repeated times it immediately clinged to said person

You were a kind soul amongst many who had 'kill or be killed' engraved in their minds beyond repair, youd still be kind to someone even if they tried to kill you, albeit hesitant

Hank gave a disaproving look but didnt say anything, though it understood why the clown would think youre both friends, your kindness in this hard world could be quite addicting, specially for those who havent gotten a single drop of kindness or mercy for years, he'd know

"but did you have to invade our base? Couldnt you have called them outside or arranged a spot for you both to meet at?" Doc added, looking at Tricky once again, gesturing outside

"I MISSED THEM TOO MUCH, YOU ALL ALREADY SEE THEM EVERYDAY! I ONLY SEE THEM EVERY FEW DAYS, CLOWN COULDNT WAIT!! YOU CANT BLAME ME" it whined, getting up from the couch and immediately clinging to you in a hug in a blink of an eye, you flinched lightly, feeling the clowns arms wrap around you firmly, as well as its hand shakingly petting your head

You just accepted you're stuck now, Deimos groaned dramatically, throwing his head back

"cmoooon are you serious? You broke our door just because youre impatient??" He threw his arms to the side as he looked back at Tricky

Theres was a pause, Tricky staring at Deimos as it and you shook, you couldn't help shaking with it, after all it was holding you basically glued to it's body

".... YEAH" Deimos just looked at Tricky with a deadpan and Sanford facepalmed, shortly after, there was a little ahem coming from the door, you all switched your attention to the door

Jeb was standing there, a few bottles of soda under one of his arms "... Hofnarr said there was a party here?-"

"YEAH JEBBY, IT'S HERE! GIMME THOSE!" Tricky let go of you and zoomed to Jeb, taking the sodas from him "WHERE'S KITCHEN?" you just- pointed at the kitchen's door and Tricky ran passed you to it

Hank turned to the man in white "the clown told you there was a party here??"

"well, yes. And he wouldnt stop pestering me to go, so I gave in.. nothings decorated though-"

"yeah! Because there ISNT one! We didnt agree to have a party here-" Deimos kicked in, throwing his arms in the air

While the boys argued with one another, you and Doc went to the kitchen, where Tricky seemed to be looking all around, you spoke first

"Tricky, bud- did you tell people there would be a party here?-"

"YEA! TO CELEBRATE MADNESS!!"

"T-Tricky- this place isnt supposed to be known!-"

"how many did you invite?" Doc interrupted you, sternly asking, Tricky made a comic thinking pose, then counting on his fingers. You and Doc shared a look of tired dismay, you could hear Tricky mumble

"Coward, Jebby, Rat man, Gilly, Gunners... A LOT OF PEOPLE!!" It looked back at you both, smiling under its mask

Doc took a deep breath, getting more and more irritated by the second

"any.. one we should worry about?" You asked, almost pleading with your eyes that Tricky didnt invite any of your enemies here

"OH! I DID INVITE CHIMNEY SMOKE, ELECTRIC ELL, GOOP MAN, GEOMETRY BOI AND THE BITCHASS FIGURE HEAD!" it said, in the most innocent voice it could muster, you both looked at him wide eyed

"you WHAAAT?!?!" you both screamed in sync, catching the attention of the others, as they rushed over to see what was going on, you think you never heard Doc yell like this before, which even surprised you

Tricky reeled back, balancing himself in a cartoony defense, standing in one leg all shriveled up and covering his head with his hands

"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR GODDAMN MIND???!" Doc yelled, getting in Tricky's face, Sanford stepped, holding back by the shoulders "calm down, Boss, what's going on??"

"ah- Tricky invited almost everyone in Nevada for this 'party' he's throwing here." you explained, "including Auditor, some other guys, and Phobos."

now it was time for the boys to get mad, Hank marched up to the clown, grabbing it by it's jacket's collar and lifting it up "HEY NO! REMEMBER OUR TRUCE FOR TODAY, NO VIOLENCE ALLOWED!!"

Hank glared at it, shaking it roughly, it wasn't really violence if it didn't injure, that's his thought process at least, Tricky made a rattling sound, like shaking a rock inside a metal can "Hofnarr, what in the world?? why would you invite them? you know we're against them!" Jeb butted in as Hank finally stopped shaking the clown

"ITS A PARTY! AND ITS OFF DAY, I THOUGHT IT'D BE UNFAIR TO LEAVE THEM OUT OF THE PARTY!"

"THERE'S NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE A PARTY HERE, WE DIDN'T AGREE TO THAT, AND NOW WE'LL HAVE TO MOVE. AGAIN." Deimos yelled, throwing his cigarette on the ground out of anger, stomping on it to put it out while grumbling, Sanford was also annoyed, a grimace on his face as they'll now have to deal with most people who hate them, hopefully they'll also have the mentality of 'no violence today' for this party

"good lord now we're going to have to deal with them, if Christoff's already here, who's to say they're not already halfway here?-" Doc rubbed his temples, annoyed "could we just, yknow- tell them there was a mistake and that there is no party?" Deimos suggested

"NAH-UH!! WE'RE HAVING THIS PARTY WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT!" Tricky yelled, Hank dropped the clown back on its feet, your buddies groaned and sighed

Doc began to give out orders, as their 'guests' could be here any minute, at least they'll have a plan "FINE- fine... but if we're going through with this let's at least make this a decent-looking party.. Tricky, since this was your idea, you get to decorate, but don't go overboard. Jebediah, since you don't live here, can you be in charge of getting snacks?-"

"I CALLED STEVE HERE, HE'S BRINGING HOT DOGS! AND GIL'S BRINGING BURGERS!!" the boys looked at Tricky with confused looks, you looked at them with a deadpan "Hotdog Vendor." you simply said, they let out an understanding sound, Tricky looked at them in disbelief "YOU REALLY DIDNT KNOW HIS NAME WAS STEVE?-" "no time for that, you can be upset about it later, Tricks. what else, Doc?"

"alright, still, Christoff, if you can cook anything, and if we have the ingredients, go for it." Jeb nodded, knowing he had no way out of this situation, he already went to the cabinets looking for ingredients and Tricky zoomed off to get decorations

"as for you four, start packing your things and leave them in the truck, Sanford, once you finish packing come help Christoff with the food, Hank help me load the things in, [Name] and Deimos greet the guest. k go go gO-"

And so, you all scrambled off, Doc rushing to the room he had the makeshift medbay in and you four rushing up to the 2nd floor of the building to your makeshift rooms, you had to room with Hank since there were only two rooms, and the duo refused to part. thankfully Hank wasn't that bad of a roommate, you just- woke up sometimes to him staring at you, either staring you down beside your mattress or from his own, it was a little odd but you didn't dare say anything about it, you also found out he sleeps with his mask, bandana, and goggles on, or maybe he just didn't want you seeing his face, which was completely valid

but it's not the time to think about that, you have to pack your things fast before people start coming in

god Tricky, what did you put us into

--------

thankfully you all didn't have much going on in your rooms aside from most weapons, this wasn't the first time you had to move locations in a hurry, which was good because you were able to load the truck with your stuff pretty quickly, only the medbay was taking a bit longer

Sanford was currently in the kitchen helping Jeb with the last of the snacks they were able to quickly make, and meanwhile, you and Deimos moved the broken doors aside so they wouldn't just be on the ground as people came in, Tricky did a pretty good job on the decor too

black, red and grey balloons around the corners, some paper springs on the ceiling and a big banner on top of the kitchen's entrance saying 'HAPPY MADNESS DAY 2022!!!!!!' inrg red, as well as an identical one on top of the front door

you just wondered where tricky got more couches??? once you came downstairs there was an L-shaped couch around the one you already had, which was also turned to the L couch, as long with two solo ones, and a few metal chairs near the walls for the ones who didn't want to socialize on the couches, he also replaced the tv table with two dining tables lines on the wall for the food

Gil was the first to get there, with multiple bags of burgers on his green arms, Deimos immediately lighted up from his grumpy mood upon seeing the Zed G03LM, rushing over to him with a greeting and helping him carry the burgers inside, the zed slurred a 'thank you' as they went inside

you just finished setting up some towels to look more presentable on the tables as they came in, Sanford and Jeb also came out with the homemade snacks they managed to make and placed them on the table, you walked to stand near the door to greet the next guest went Hank and Doc rushed past you to get to the back of the house to load the last things from the medbay in the truck, almost knocking you over accidentally, Doc chocked a 'sorry' as they left view

you just chuckled, this was a mess huh? at least things were done in time before most of the guests came in, the Hotdog vendor was next, still in his usual apron as he brought his whole ass cart with him

you greeted the man with a smile, who returned the same, he liked you, aside from Tricky you're the only nice client he has, though he's pretty sure Tricky is only more behaved towards him to get hotdogs faster since Steve didn't bend for rude clients

"Hey Steve, glad you could make it!" you said with a wave "Sup, [Name]! good to see you too-.. what happened to your door?-" "Clown." you simply replied, gesturing to the broken doors to the side of the house

Steve chuckled "well isn't that convenient? then I don't have to take the cart inside, could you help me take the dogs inside and hide the cart under the doors?-" "I CAN HELP! I CAN HELP!" Tricky zoomed beside you jumping excitedly like a little kid, making your clothes swoosh a little with the speed he came with-

the hotdog man laughed at Tricky's excitement, accepting the help, the clown immediately rushed off to grab a big plate for the hotdogs, coming back just as quick as both of them began loading the plate

you looked behind them and saw the well-known cowboy coming your way, you began walking to meet him halfway, he tipped his head at you and smiled "howdy, [Name], real nice seein' ya, I ain't late, am I?"

you chuckled at his accent, it always amused you "good to see you too, Sher. no, you're actually pretty early, you can get going inside."

--------------

and bit by bit, more and more Guests came along, first came some familiar faces, Skinner, Dave, Q-bert, Bossman- all in the same ride, then came the Gunner Twins, Crackpot- hell even Garrett showed up,

everyone was already inside by now, chattering and laughter around the room as Tricky chatted with Garrett, Crackpot and Steve about Slaughter Time, Hank just stood in the corned talking to Doc and Skinner leaning on the wall as Deimos chatted with Gil, Sanford and the rest eating and chatting near the tables, this reminded you of the past when Madness wasn't a thing

when everyone wasn't constantly trying to kill each other, the so-called Madness Day was a breath of Fresh air honestly... though you were still missing a couple guests, so you were just standing against the front door waiting. Jeb came up beside you, crossing his arms over his chest

"taking a breather?" he asked, leaning on the wall beside you "ehh, that and waiting for Auditor and co." Jeb sighed aggrievedly "gods.. why did he invite them, they were constantly trying to kill us."

you chuckled, giving him a jab with your elbow "because it would be fair for them not to be invited on an off day, remember?" you recalled what Tricky said earlier, you got a small smile from the older man, he sighed

"... this is oddly peaceful.. it almost feels wrong..."

"I know, right? it's so weird not having to fight for your life against these guys..." you thew your head back, gently bonking the back of your head against the wall, hearing the laughs from inside flood your brain, they actually seem like they're having a good time

silence fell among you both, as you just waited for the last ones to come, feeling the breeze hit your face as you occasionally looked around the land, eventually, Jeb broke the silence

"... [Name], may I be honest with you?"

"sure, what's up, old man?" you joked, looking at him with a grin, he shot you a glare before softening again, looking out at the land and shaking his head with a small smile

"you know, since you came along, things have been a lot more interesting... not much different from a world standpoint but- since I met you, things have been.. different."

"Really?"

he nodded "you brought some light to darkness, it's clear the others like you, you're a pleasing presence, kind, calm and playful, I honestly hadn't seen the four ever really smile as much as they do around you- well, I can't tell for Hank, but I can for Deimos and Sanford, and hear a smile in Doc's voice when you talk to them."

you almost teared up, smiling at him over the sweet words "oh.. Jeb.. that's-"

"Fucking ridiculous." you yelped as you were suddenly picked up, and placed on a broad shoulder, looking down, you realized it was Phobos- now you're damn confused

"Phobos?! you fiend, put them down!" Jeb pulled out his sword, pointing up at Phobos "do not point my own sword at me, Jebediah, I was there when it was made." the Director pushed the sword to the side with his hand "and remember, no violence day, Christoff~" he grinned behind his bandages as Jeb glared at him, hesitantly putting away his sword

"thank you for your patience, by the way, I was quite busy." The Director looked up at you, satisfied that at least someone was decent enough to wait to greet him "ah-.. of course, Director, welcome... May you put me down?-"

Phobos nodded, putting you down and walking inside, you and Jebediah suddletly felt a chill down your spines, you looked in front of you, four cores in different colors decended from the sky, taking form shortly after

The first was Auditor in all his red flaming glory;

Then the blue core, who seemed to have a water like consistency, although you could see what looked like glitches around it and deep blue eyes, they looked tired; you had asked Jeb before about them when you were able to, you recalled this one was called Conductor

The next was the white core, they seemed to have a more geometric or blocky take to its form and white eyes, seemed the more neutral looking of them; you think this is Deliberator

And next was the pink core, who has a goopy like consistence, though while it formed it seemed to fog in your vision, sure they looked a lot more softer then what you initially saw, they had bright pink eyes, look smug and ready to cause chaos; this must be Stygian

Jeb sighed, looking annoyed at rhe four "so you finally decided to show up..."

"oh shut your trap, Christoff, we arrived right at the time the clown gave us... [Name]." Auditor greeted you with a nod, which you returned, he began to walk inside with his friends, the other three waved at you as they passed you and Christoff

You waved back as Christoff rubbed his face "this'll be a long gathering..." You groaned, you laughed softly, hearing Tricky begin to play some music

"tell me about it... Lets get inside before they break tradition and start killing each other over something dumb." You began heading inside, Jebediah couldnt help but smile a little at your remark with a puff from his nose, soon walking inside as well and deciding to join Tricky on the speakers, faintly hearing Phobos talk great shit about himself as always

He thought back on what you two were talking about earlier.... This feels normal.. even with all the interesting faces of those who won their concequences from their actions.. it still felt mostly normal again, no violence, no madness, no fights.. at least physical ones for today

He sighed, a small smile tugging at his lips, until Tricky walked to him

"HAPPY MADNESS DAY, JEBBY!" it exclaimed, handing the other a drink... It had its mask around its neck and back, a drink in its other hand... Was he wearing his old glasses...?

Christoff stared at his friend for a moment, before chuckling and smiling at the Clown

"Happy Madness Day... Hofnarr..."

================================

[nevadas-night-time-novelist]

hai

if its alr with you, can i please request an auditor x angel!reader?? im so STARVED for auditor content 😭😭

Feather light and black as night

Auditor x Angel!Reader

The contrast between you and your lover was almost comical in nature. Auditor, a being of hellfire, destruction, darkness and doom, and you, in pristine white robes, gilded jewellery, gold painted nails, and a beautiful decorated halo behind you head.

A vicious warmongerer in black and blood red, and a pure light of salvation seeking to heal wounded and lost sheep in your shared domain.

Your feathered ears twitched softly, listening intently to the wayward sinner before you, his burned out red eyes full of anger and indignant righteousness. "I understand your plight, shepard, but you and I both know calling on my kin to purge the land of this wickedness won't work. There are factors at play that put all of us in danger, and calling on Heaven's highest orders will amount to thousands of holy souls lost."

"This is unjust and you know it! A fellow angel should realise this! Wicked sin has scorned this earth and continues to mount, you think Heaven's gates will be safe should they learn a way to access theme?" Jebediah slammed his hands on your desk, his own damaged wings spreading wide. "It's only a matter of time before this wickedness spills over, and even Heaven itself will be corrupted."

"Have you no faith in the lord, Christoff?" Blinking slowly, your feathery eyelashes somehow fanning the flames of his damaged soul. "I know you're desperate for a solution, this is your home. But I cannot call upon those higher than me, even if I wanted to. Rest assured, we are watching, and when the time is right, Heaven's gates shall open, and salvation shall come to all the land. Patience, Christoff, is a virtue after all."

Jeb folded his wings behind his back, despite how often he came to argue his point, he would always back down at your words. You knew deeply he was soothed by the presence of a divine being, seeking to vent his anger and conflicted feelings at someone he shared ambitions with. "I shall continue this plight alone then, for now."

"You're never alone, Christoff. The lord is with you always. Go now in peace, shepard. May the light shine with you."

"And with you." As he left your office, the Auditor passed him, and slipped in, seeing as you were now alone.

"Is he bothering you again?" He knew of Jeb's reoccurring visits too, a desperate wannabe holy soul begging for reassurance he was on the right path.

"Not at all." Your wings fluffed up as you stood. "Greetings, Auditor. How may I aid you today?" The light of your halo illuminated your features, bathing everything in divine holy light.

Auditor shut the door with a flick of his wrist. "It's an informal visit, this time." He crossed the room and his figure melded to yours, his flames rolling into each crevice in your robe, swirling into your hair, gliding between your feathers.

To an angel, no matter their rank, touching wings was seen as the highest form of intimacy, saved for family, close friends, and lovers. "I'm still supposed to be working, my love," If Auditor had knees, they'd be weakening right now.

The sweet pet name, love, and the fact you called him yours. The words rolled off your tongue often enough, but the sparks in his stomach never dimmed, no matter how much you used them, never losing their lustre.

"Do you have any idea how maddening it is having you so close, but never close enough with those prying eyes?" Auditor longed to bask in your holiness every second of the day, but both of you had work to attend to, making his desires impossible.

You'd been sent down initially by your arch angel to help convert sinners, purgatory and hell having too high an intake for the demons to keep track of, and heaven offered to lighten the load, as long as the wayward would allow light into their hearts.

His lips brushed against yours, the heat of his body rushing over you, and instinctively you kissed back, hand cradling the back of his head, his hands coming to rest in the curve of your back and on your spine.

Reflexively, your spine plumage puffed up, an indicator of relaxation. "We still have much to do before we retire for the night," You mumbled softly, but you leaned further in his arms, letting him secure you in his grasp.

"You're not backing off though, angel." Auditor teased you. If you really wanted to, he'd let you go, but both of you knew you didn't want that right now. His touch felt good, and it had been a long day already. "Care to split early and allow me to indulge in your presence?"

A stubborn hardass, but Audi had a soft spot for you, not only because of the power you represented, but because your attitude. You were a lot more positive than the other people he was surrounded by, and that was what attracted him to you to begin with.

"Very well, I suppose we've earned some time to ourselves." You wriggled from his grasp, much to his mumbling protests, but you needed to turn your sign around. 'The Angel is OUT, please return at 6am.'

Auditor's body once again embraced yours, he was feeling rather clingy today. His hands rolled over your arms, fingers interlacing with yours, his chest pressed into your back, head resting on your shoulder, carefully avoiding being stabbed by the spikes of your halo. "Are you finished here dear?"

A gasp left your lips as he lightly nibbled your neck. "Behave!" Your wings puffed up, eyes opening on them to stare at him. "Such behaviour in public is inappropriate!" Even with nobody around, angelic prudishness still shone through.

"Then allow us to go somewhere more private?" Darkness filled the room, and suddenly you were both in the Auditor's private chambers. It was dimly lit by candles, and soft ambient lighting from fairy lights on the ceiling. Lavender incense burned on his side table, bed carefully laid with your favourite comforter and pillows.

"You've been slacking off work to do this, haven't you?" You giggled, turning to see him changing into lounge wear, hanging his suit up to keep it crisp and straight.

"Perhaps a little. But you're worth the effort, and so much more, carissima." You opened your drawers, taking out your own lounge robes, slits in the back to fit your wings into. Fresh white linens with golden embroidery, folded with care and neatly in line. "Lay down, I would like to prune your wings, if you'll allow me."

Audi melted into the floor, flames rolling over the ground and onto the bed, before he manifested again, patting his lap. He really, really loved your wings. "Very well, seeing as how much effort you've put into this." Slumping down onto your shared bed, you spread your left wing over his lap, and he carefully began to run his fingers into the white plumage.

Black and red mixing with white and gold, a harsh contrast that seemed to fit so well together. "Ah amica mea, you're too kind." Again your spines puffed up, relaxing as Audi's warm hands massaged your wings and pulled out loose feathers.

Latin, oh, you nearly made him swoon. "Anything for you carissima."

"I do have a query, dear."

"Yes my lover?"

"What do you do with my loose feathers?"

Ah.

"I.. Keep them. In my suits. Replace them once they get frayed and worn. It's nice to have little pieces of you with me when you can't be there physically." He leaned down, kissing your wing softly.

"Unfair, why don't I have something like that?" You giggled playfully, not being serious.

Auditor's face turned red, that was unexpected. "I could offer you that if you wanted." You looked up at him, his face flush and burning. "There is nothing you could ask for that I couldn't deliver." He summoned a golden necklace, a tiny vial acting as the pendant. Slowly unscrewing the top, he placed a piece of his fire into the jar, sealing it shut again. "Sit up, let me put it on you."

You obeyed, rising to your knees and turning your back to him, sweeping your hair out of the way, allowing him to attach the chain. "It's perfect," Touching the bottle, you felt heat radiating from it, the same warmth when he touched you.

"And how perfectly it adds to you." He smiled, cuddling into you. "What a wonderful idea, now people will be aware of the fact you're mine."

[headlessjest]

auditor hugging y/n and little tendril things wrap around em

Funny fire/shadow person.

[avatar-of-the-scribe]

how about another Audi? maybe some headcanons of him with an employer!reader? that or any other type of reader you feel like writing for, I don't mind any! whatever makes you comfortable. thank you and have a nice day!

Well. Time to get back to it Hm? Writers block will not keep me down forever! Auditor with an Employer Reader? I'll see what I can do!

Auditor x Employer! Reader Headcanons

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

One thing I can tell for certain is he worries far less for you, knowing that you too are an Employer- You are far less mortal than the grunts of Nevada. He sees you as far more capable of handling the threats and dangers, just don't go trying to one on one Hank. Could you beat Wimbleton? Likely. Would that fight give Auditor a Heart attack? Absolutely.

Whatever your task or job is as an Employer, he's fascinated by it. It could be a task as huge as recording the fates of those who lived, or as little as just overseeing this world. No matter what he enjoys hearing about your accomplishments in whatever you do. Please, feel free to tell him about it.

Employers biologically are a bit different, so if you do get injured he's very likely just to handle it himself instead of letting a medic go tend to you. Does he sometimes mess with improbability using the internalized drive he has to give you a higher chance of healing quicker? Well... No one can prove that ;)

One of his favorite things to do with you is dance on the roof of his main agency at night. Two shadow figures swirling around, waltzing through the darkness in a long since forsaken world. The moment a bit of peace in the chaos, the eye of the storm.

Speaking of forsaken world... You're just about the only thing in this world and beyond he sees as truthfully worth his time that's not something that he's tasked to terminate. Hank and that infuriating organization he works with are only a focal point because of being an ever present thorn in his flaming side. You, though, are the highlight of eternity to his existence- his light in such a dark world. And he hopes you see him the same way.

You are still getting spoiled. He's a man of power after all, which means you can be given the best of gifts he can give to you. Give him gifts in return and watch him melt into a flustered puddle, unsure if the heat in his face is natural or induced by the invisible blush across his face.

[rotshop]

sillay insert doodles bc i havent done THAT in a while ,,,,,,,,,, tee hee

[saltymongoose]

SO. We had the player kiss the main 4... but perhaps the player sharing some kissies with the employers? If you are up for that? Like, how would they react to the player kissing them? Or how would they attempt to kiss the player? 🤔 Given how the Auditor is, I would guess and say he is the more... forceful one.

This is a good idea Anon, it's been a while since we've had any content centered around the Employers. I've had some requests for sequels to that surprise cuddles and kisses set I've done, so I've added some of that here as well to make it the first of those. I hope you like these though. :) <3

(Note: Just consider this an alternate timeline where the Employers actually listened to you like they should've lol.)

[Part 2] The Player Surprises Them with Cuddles/Kisses ft. The Employers

(TW: Yandere, Obsessive Behavior, Mentions of Shocking (with electricity) but no harm comes to the Player. A bit suggestive in the Auditor's part but not that badly.)

- [STYGIAN] -

From the moment you’d decided to get close to Stygian, you knew you’d have to approach it differently than with the other Employers. The mere idea of giving affection to them was an oddity, as they typically acted as though they didn’t want or need you to touch them, yet they showed obvious hostility whenever anyone else did.

Should the Deliberator try to place a hand on you, or the Auditor wrap you up in another embrace, Stygian’s always the first to protest. “You shouldn’t be laying a finger on them,” they’d say, “It’s blasphemous that you’d think to do so first. Remember your place, worm."

Perhaps it’s because they’re naturally very private, or maybe they just want to appear “above” such baser behaviors (even if they're filled with spite and jealousy when the others engage in them). They were an Employer; temptations of such kind should be foreign to them. However, for the first time in Stygian’s existence, they felt that want. No, the need. For someone else’s attention and touch, and someone who’s above them at that.

It was shameful, and an unnecessary overstepping of the boundaries that come with such hierarchies. Stygian has been around a long time and was far wiser than their younger, more impulsive colleague. They deeply respect you, even if their understanding of humans (or simply “normal” people, including grunts) is stunted by their absolute unwillingness to interact with most people or indulge in their foolishness. But that’s the problem; you make them foolish.

Holding hands is the most they’re willing to do with you behind closed doors, but you weren’t ignorant to the way they seemed to want more than that. And you’d give it to them. After all, despite how weird Stygian acted, they were one of the Employers you felt most comfortable around. (Even if you had to sternly lecture them about the indirect way they spoke to you sometimes. Questions were always an issue with the Employers, which got extremely tiring very fast.)

Truthfully, you found surprising Stygian with affection to be fun. The way they freeze when you wrap your arms around their torso as best you can is very amusing, but even better is how you can feel the smoke on their body heat up drastically, as though it’s steam rising from them instead of that fog that makes up their form.

The Employer doesn’t exactly need to breathe, but you swear you can hear a slight choking noise when you press into them. They only move to look down once their larger, wispy hands reach down to cover your own as if they’re checking to make sure they aren’t imagining that you’re actually embracing them.

After doing their own form of confirmation, they’ll slowly turn towards you, carefully leaning down to get closer to your height as their arms come up, but pausing just before they wrap around you in turn. They weren’t sure what they were waiting for; you were already embracing them, but their own hesitancy prevented them from returning it, their usual principles forcing them into an unsure position as they battled over which side of themselves they should listen to. The one that yearned for your touch and affection, the very same that made their form heat and their gaze soften as they looked at you, or the stricter side that tried to show how worthy they were of your favor through restraint and keeping that thin boundary between you, one of Player and subject. (They refused to be like the Auditor, who just seemed to take what he wanted.)

Yet when you look up at them and give them a bright grin, your colorful eyes filled with an almost shocking level of affection, they feel their body relax despite themselves, and they hold you closer. Their grip is soft at first, yet it tightens over time as they pull you into their smoky form, their paws encompassing your waist and shoulders as they give in to their inhibitions for once and revel in this gift you’ve given them.

Stygian’s never felt warmth like yours before; the cozy heat that blooms from where your torso presses against them makes them feel hot, but it isn’t uncomfortable. No, instead it feels almost addictive, like they’ve been hit with the sudden realization of just how cold they’ve been without you there. The smoke that makes up their form seems to rise around you, clouding the points where you touch as they lean further into you with a low hum. They’re nearly kneeling on the floor just to be close to you, daring to nuzzle into your temple as they make a noise of contentment. They're truly happy, for once.

Kissing Stygian is another matter. Despite being very standoffish and cold, they’d do whatever you asked, and you used this to get them to lean down towards you. They typically expected that you’d tell them something, or perhaps bless them with another one of those hugs you liked to give out. However, when you place your hands on their face instead and gently pull them down further so you can kiss them, their reaction depends on where it is.

If you do it on their cheek, they’ll pause before nuzzling slightly into yours. They don’t kiss you back, but the way the smoke on their form flares up for a second reveals just how flustered you’ve made them. As does the small, polite “thank you” they murmur, almost as if they’re dazed at what just happened.

A kiss on the lips, however, will cause them to freeze yet again, the magenta slits that form their eyes widening before they take in exactly what you're doing. They move tentatively against you, but when you respond with a content sigh they're only emboldened, movements becoming more frantic as their impulses threaten to consume them. They shift to press into you and your senses are overcome with their smoke and the lingering scent of night air.

You pull away and they push closer, almost chasing your lips before they stop abruptly, as if trying to reign themselves in again. Their form seems more unstable than before, but they don't care. As long as they can keep touching you, it doesn't matter how put together they look.

This is also similar to the manner in which Stygian usually kisses you. They'll lean down to face you when you're with them, stopping when they're close enough for you to see how the dark fog cascades from their form in small plumes. A single clawed hand carefully raises your chin, and they murmur a small apology against your lips as they lean in. (“Forgive me if this is improper," they said. As if you were going to be mad at them for this.) Softness quickly gives way to desperation, and they nearly shudder when they feel the tip of your tongue trace the seam of their "lips."

As you pull back from each other, you notice how lax they seem to be afterwards, the bright color of their eyes smoothing from their narrowed shape. They're relaxed, even if their grip on you is anything but.

Stygian feels fulfilled, for once. Like this is something that they’ve always wanted and longed for, even before they knew of your existence. But even so, it isn’t enough, not nearly. They wonder if this is what love is, to only feel complete when they’re with you. It must be; Stygian has never felt genuine adoration for anyone like this before, but they knew that it was the only explanation. Giving in could truly be rewarding, it seems.

- [THE DELIBERATOR] -

The Deliberator is probably the friendliest of the Employers, or at least the most polite. While he isn’t one to push his affections on you suddenly, some touchiness is always expected from him which makes returning it a simple matter (unlike with the others).

However, while the Deliberator loves giving you a quick hug, or ruffling your hair affectionately as he walks by, he never thought you’d take the initiative to give him it first. Why would he? He wasn’t stupid enough to assume a higher being like yourself would care that much for people like the Employers (lowly compared to you, of course). However, he’d come to know just how mistaken he was.

He’s genuinely overjoyed the moment he feels your smaller form’s weight on him, the arrows and other geometrical shapes that rise from him whirl around you harmlessly as he laughs, turning to scoop you up and bring you closer. He’s excitable, barely able to stand still as he rocks on his heels, swaying with you held tenderly to his torso. “Thank you,” he seems to breathe against you, “You always seem to know just what I need.”

You chuckle, and you think you can feel him smile against your hand when you reach up to pat him on the cheek affectionately. He nuzzles into your palm with a love-struck sigh, his shadowy body relaxing against your smaller one.

(He never knew that someone could make him feel so at ease, and so infatuated with their very being. The Deliberator is aware of his emotions, and knows that the love he felt for you was stronger than any feeling he'd had before.

He wonders if you knew of the effect you had on him - if you were aware of how he pined for every touch, word, and glance you had the possibility to give him. He wonders if you knew just how much he wanted to be completely enveloped in anything and everything you, until he knew more about you than anyone else, and you were so intertwined that you couldn't be kept from each other. He wanted everything you could give, and in return, he'd give you all that he was.)

Surprising the Deliberator with a kiss is also met with an ecstatic reaction on his part, and with how touchy he is it’s very easy to do. All that’s needed is for you to brace a hand against his jaw when he’s close enough, and gently pull him down to meet your gaze. His glowing eyes disappear for a second when he “blinks” and leans into your hands happily, only to go wide with a flash when you lean in.

The Deliberator knew your skin was soft, and he had imagined what it would feel like to have your lips against him many, many times. (Daydreaming about you was the thing he did the most outside of his actual job; he didn’t care to limit his thoughts about you for the sake of productivity).

But he didn’t know just how good kissing you would be; with you slowly moving your lips against his in a way that sent shivers through him and prompted a near whine to leave him as he softly pressed back. (He didn’t even know anything could elicit such a noise, mind you.)

You pull away to find him bleary and dazed, with a tight grip on you that barely allows you to move from him. He leans in closer to you quickly, whispering a plea against your lips. “Please, do that again,” he begs, and because you’re so kind (something he was always quick to praise you for) you do. As many times as he needs.

This moment was the catalyst of all the times the Deliberator found it necessary to kiss you first as well, which he does quite often. Kisses from the Deliberator are always soft and quick; stolen in the midst of one of those hugs he sweeps you up in, or simply a quick peck to the lips as he greets you. It’s done impulsively and as he’s filled with excitement just from being so close with you (and from the knowledge that you like it when he does this), and it shows from how he'll pepper the corners of your lips with them, eventually moving to kiss your cheeks as you laugh. He always returns to your lips though, in the end.

It’s usually up to you to go deeper with it, surprising him with a bite to his lip or a flick of your tongue against his mouth, something that never fails to pull a flustered gasp from him. (It’s a way for you to take back what little control you lose when he surprises you like this.)

The Deliberator is almost delirious when you slide your tongue into his mouth, head hazy from your warmth and the feeling of your lips and body against his. As you pulled away to breathe, they made a mental note to try to initiate this more with you. After all, if you seemed to enjoy it so much, then why wouldn’t they indulge in it more often? He'd give you anything, and he'd allow you to take even more. It's what you deserve, as his beloved.

- [THE CONDUCTOR] -

It’s hard to show the Conductor physical affection, at least it was at first. The whole reason why he had settled on simply recording your movements (amongst many other things) was that he couldn't exactly participate in them. The electricity that coursed through the Conductor was enough to cause you discomfort, even the beginnings of pain if it went on longer than a few minutes.

It was too much for him to risk; injuring you just to feel the sensation of your skin against the shadowy mass that made up his own was a trade-off he wasn't willing to make. Not that he doesn't want to, of course.

He wouldn’t ever tell you, but he had always been incredibly jealous of the other Employers just for how they can come into close contact with you. Their relationships with you appear to be far more intimate as a result, and while he's sure he can eventually reach that level of closeness (metaphorically speaking), it's simply unfair that he'd have to do so in a longer amount of time. It's the only time he'd question himself on why he was given this form by the Machine - a rarity, as there are few beings more sure of themselves than the Employers.

Despite his attempts to hide his envy, you eventually noticed. It was almost pitiable, and a part of you felt bad for having to leave the Conductor out of the affection you showed the others. It had taken quite a learning curve to strengthen your bond with the Employers (with you teaching them more than not; they really were clueless when it came to how normal people acted, even if they could pretend they weren’t for a short time). So you found a prospective solution to this issue; helping the Conductor control his conductivity. Or at least, making it so the volts that make up his being don’t cause you harm.

With this work in mind, and how quickly the Conductor was to agree (eager, you’d say, from how quickly he nodded and spoke word after word of gratefulness to you for thinking about trying), you began to show him more physical affection. It was a slow process, as you knew that genuinely startling him with a hug or even hand-holding likely wouldn’t end well. However, merely surprising him, on the other hand, was very easy.

The Conductor had never expected you to show him any care through touch, so when you lean over to him and gently take one of his hands in yours, running your thumbs along the unstable, ever-changing surface of his skin (or his equivalent to it), he flinches. You feel the quick zap of static against your fingers, and he immediately turns to ask if you’re okay, voice shaky and tinged with worry. He moved to pull his hand from your grasp before you could answer, but his eyes widened when you tighten your grip.

“I’m fine, Conductor, don’t worry. You’ve gotten better at controlling it, good job,” you say with a proud grin and lean further into his side, genuinely happy with his progress (he has worked diligently at it, after all). He burns at the praise, head tilting to the side as he shyly averts his gaze from you.

The Conductor never knew how nice it felt to have someone so happy for such a relatively small accomplishment (even if controlling his electrical currents did take considerable work, and the threat of hurting you again caused him immense anxiety). He looks back at you, unsure of what to do before you gesture for him to wrap an arm around your shoulders, and he does so, stiffening slightly when you nonchalantly lean into him in response. If he had a heart, it’d be beating dangerously fast. (So you'd wanted him to touch you more?)

He’s scared of hurting you, but at the same time, he can’t help feeling almost gleeful at how you’ve decided to give him this experience. At how you've decided to trust him with your safety and give him this second chance at physical affection.

Kissing the Conductor is very much the same, with how his actions are permeated by inexperience and the need for direction. He goes tense when you loop your arms around his neck and pull him in, at first believing that you just wanted a more intimate embrace, until you leaned up and pressed your lips into the wavering form of what made up his.

He gasps quietly and his hands release their hold on you, and you can hear the harsh crack of electricity from his fingers as he moves them away from you. (The last thing he wanted to do was make you pull away and stop kissing him because he was too surprised to get control of himself.)

The tingly feeling of the electrical currents running through his body isn’t unpleasant by any stretch, and you hear the hum of building static get louder when you sigh against him, tilting your head in an attempt to get him moving again. He reflects your movements curiously, lips molding against yours in slow, careful movements that make a grin pull at the corners of yours.

He doesn’t exactly relax until he feels you smile against him before pulling away, and if you could see them you’d realize that his hands hadn’t stopped shaking for the entirety of your kiss. He’s nervous for once in his life; terrified of screwing up things between you because he doesn’t know what to do. 

(You can’t blame him for it, or at least he hopes you’d see it that way. He’s never felt this way about anyone else, never been plagued with thoughts of how death would be a preferable alternative to losing your favor and attention. It’s dramatic, but he’s heard love was supposed to be that way.)

When it comes to the Conductor kissing you, it's always a decision with a lot of rumination behind it. He spends hours thinking of what he should do to initiate it, taking in your past reactions to anything affectionate (and how you kiss him) to come up with a suitable plan to get the best results. It’s not like you’re a test subject, but he doesn’t think he’d be able to handle the embarrassment of it going badly.

For you, though, it’s just as sudden as when you decide to do it. You’ll be sitting at his side before he shifts closer, far more than you’d been expecting at the time, and you’ll turn to face him with a questioning look. He seems to hesitate for a moment, but he’s upon you before you can get a word out, slamming his lips against yours in a motion you knew would end with a painful clacking of teeth if he was a human. He isn’t though, so you don’t find the need to correct him, instead leaning into him to press more firmly, delighting in how his grip tightens (likely to try and still his trembling hands). When you pull back from him, he looks at ease, even if the noise of electrical currents is far louder than before.

He wonders if doing it again as he'd like would be too greedy - a thought repeated each time he repeatedly presses his lips against yours.

- [THE AUDITOR] -

The Auditor has always been very physically affectionate with you, even when you first arrived and expected to see the opposite from him. This actually means surprising him with affection is rather rare, since he’d prefer to never spend even a single second away from your side. He considers it to be where he rightfully belongs, after all.

Though he actually is somewhat very shocked when you decide to do something before he can, if not a little taken aback at how you beat him to the punch. He considers it to be his responsibility to shower you with all the affection he can muster giving; he was the more "inferior" being in this scenario after all, and he already knew he loved you, so working for your approval was a given.

Plus, even if he’d absolutely love it if you returned his gestures (more than you could possibly know), he had little expectation that you’d do so in such a short period of knowing him. You certainly didn’t for the first few weeks you spent together. Besides, he wouldn't say he's that delusional. Not after his initial hopes of it were dashed, at least.

So you can imagine his surprise when you nudged his arms up from where they were resting on his desk, only to take a seat on his lap. He paused and you took a moment to get comfortable, leaning back into his chest and flashing him a lazy grin.

It takes him a moment to take in but he masks his surprise with a quiet chuckle, wrapping a single arm around your waist to pull your hips closer before loosening it - just slightly so he can let his hand rest on your side just under where your ribs end. His long fingers sneak under the hem of your shirt so he can smooth over your skin whilst the other writes on the paperwork he has to complete.

He thinks he's good at hiding his true reaction, but the way you feel the already-warm form of his flair with sudden heat (one you knew was hotter than usual) tells another story. As did the way his flames seemed to burn brighter and less controlled, and how he even raised a hand to tighten his tie (something he never did; it's not like it moved much with his clip holding it in place).

It was amusing, as the Auditor never broke composure like this before. However, the way you blushed at how suddenly he yanked you flush to his body made up for the "inequality" in how flustered you both were. Naturally, he notices this.

"Comfortable, darling?" He asks with a slightly teasing tone, reaching down with his other hand to cup your face and run a clawed thumb over your cheek. He doesn't know why you decided to get all close to him on your own, but that doesn't mean he won't take advantage of the situation to see how your face flushes and how your eyes flicker with changing emotions as he touches you more.

You thoroughly expect this at this point though. "Yes, of course, love," you say, "why wouldn't I be?" The response is done with practiced nonchalance, and you thought you might be able to get more of a bashful or embarrassed reaction. Though instead he only paused again before humming in contemplation. His hand tightened its grip on you and moved further underneath your shirt to trace further over your bare skin, and you inhaled shakily. So much for that attempt.

(Unbeknownst to you, he was trying to wrestle his emotions out of the way so you wouldn't see how much he was freaking out over what you said. He's immensely grateful for not having the ability to blush or purr as grunts do in moments like these, he'd prefer not to embarrass himself like this. How could he be viewed as a strong partner if you saw him get so worked up over your simple comments? But try as he might, he couldn't stop the sound of you calling him a genuine pet name from echoing in his mind.

Love, huh? Is that what you really thought of him as? It'd only be better if it was preceded by a "my", as being known simply as "your Love" was better than even his official title given to him by the Machine. If he has to define his very being by your terms, then that was more than acceptable. He was already yours, so why wouldn't it be?)

While your sudden surprises of affection only made him bolder with giving out his own (if that were even possible), it made you wonder what other reactions you could pull from him. Which is what gave you the idea to kiss him in the first place.

Oddly enough, while the Auditor could be very intrusive with how he insists on giving you attention physically, and had actually kissed you before (unlike the others), he'd never dared to do it on the mouth. He instead placed them close to the very corner of your lips, or your cheeks, or on your hands (most commonly).

(If only you knew how much restraint it took him. The Auditor knows he's hasty and rash, but with how powerful he was, taking whatever he wanted whenever he wanted was child’s play. And you had no idea just how badly he wanted to kiss you, really kiss you.

He wanted to watch your features contort in surprise, only to grow flushed and heated as he presses further into you. He wants to know what you taste like, and how those teeth of yours feel against his shadowy, unstable sinew when he runs his “tongue” along them. But patience was important. Despite how his urges call to him, everything had its time. He could sate himself through cuddling or chaste pecks on your cheek or forehead. For now.)

With how much he focused on trying not to be headstrong (which was very rare), he was blindsided when you kissed him first. He’s always close, which makes it simple for you, and as you tug on his crimson tie to get him nearer to your face, he actually thinks you’re going to kiss him on the cheek or something similar - “Returning the favor” as he heard you say before. However, you instead turn your head to plant your lips firmly on where his own are.

His reaction is instant, immediately pressing forward into you as his hands come up, one tugging you closer by your waist as the other cradles the back of your head. His body grows so hot that he almost burns you when you reach up to wind your arms around his neck and nip at the weirdly firm “surface” of his lips (or his equivalent of them, anyway).

He moans lowly when he feels your teeth tug at his bottom lip, responding by pushing you closer. You inhale sharply at the noise, only to gasp when you feel a sort of tongue-like appendage sweep across your lips, only for it to enter your mouth as a result.

The Auditor's taste is odd, like that of smoke, and the overwhelming scent of him is just the same, filled with the ash and flame that's so characteristic of him. The air feels thick with it as you inhale through your nose, a noise slipping from you as he maps out the individual shapes of your teeth and winds his "tongue" with yours. You pull away just as you feel the pointed tip of it dart up against the very back of your mouth's roof, shivering and panting as clouds of smoke leave your breath, as though you've just taken a long drag from a cigarette.

The Auditor is almost shaking, mind running a mile a minute as he quickly reflects over your actions. He's not as surprised as you'd expect, but he's not all there either; his overwhelming need for more of your touch, and the want to worship you physically as you so rightfully deserve has only gotten stronger. And now he wonders - as he leans back to insistently press his lips on yours once more, and delights in how you push back roughly - what's the harm in letting go and doing as he always does?

The floodgates were broken with that simple interaction, and you should expect him to kiss you every time you end up together; whether it be a chaste one or a long, drawn-out kiss that ends with your hands tugging at his once-perfectly-put together collar so you can take a breath, he needs it now. It's almost like he can't live without it, and it shows in how rushed his movements are. While he isn't forceful enough to do it if you push him away, he is enough to initiate it whenever he feels the time is right (which is almost always).

He just wants to feel every part of you he can all the time, so that the memory of you and how you feel is so ingrained into him that he'd never be able to forget it. The way you react to his kisses is addictive, and he wants to see it again and again. It's part of how he shows his love, you see, and there is nobody more deserving of such attention than you.

But you should also know, from the words he whispers to you on occasion, that you're the only person he'd ever do this for because you're the only one he belongs to. The Auditor is always taking what he wants, so why don't you officially take him? It is your right, and he's always been yours, after all.