#marry me a rich man asap

[asphodeldreams]

why do i have to be at work i want to go home and draw agent washington

[hamilando]

ੈ✩ a monaco cruise (smau) ੈ✩

pairing : lando norris x fem reader

summary : the chaotic process of Lando getting a wife

fc: Olivia Culpo

a/n : This is a series, let me know if you want to be tagged in future parts ! it was requested anonymously, thank you for requesting it 🫶🏻

·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ

liked ynculpo, mclaren, oscarpiastri, carlossainz55 and 682,278 others

landonorris Monaco with my monegasque 🧡🌟🌅

view comments

user1 isn’t he British ?

user2 his girlfriend is from Monaco

mclaren a win coming up 💪🏻

liked by landonorris

ynculpo my little british man 😮‍💨💫❤️

landonorris from which angle am I little!?

george.russell your height 🫷🏻

landonorris can you like not …interfere ?

user3 Lando with his wife and side chick 🐤

user4 BAHAHA- WE ALL KNOW WHO IS THE SIDE CHICK

user5 who ?

user6 Y/N 🌝

ynculpo excuse me

user4 BAHAHAHAH SHE REPLIED

user5 can you stop with your bahahaha’s?

user6 BAHAHAHAHAH no.

charlesleclerc a very special weekend indeed ✊🏻

landonorris I beating you ?

carlossainz55 I think we all know who is winning

maxverstappen1 me in the race, Lando in the heart

landonorris CAN YOU STOP ✋🏻

user7 I smell something ☕️

user8 max’s comment will not age well

user9 LORD PERCEVAL FOR THE WIN

user10 HAIL LORD HOLY CHARLES LECLERC

liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1, lilihye and 452,284 others

ynculpo 4 more shots in Monaco 🧡🌅🍑

view comments

maxverstappen1 bunda 🍑

ynculpo 🗿

georgerussell damn, the middle pic be too fine 😮‍💨

ynculpo 🗿

alex.albon marry me middle pic 💪🏻

ynculpo 🗿

lilihye marry me y/n

landonorris HEY, SHOO 🤺

ynculpo it’s a yes lily 🫶🏻

charlesleclerc NO, HIS PLAN

ynculpo what plan 🗿

landonorris his plan of marrying you

ynculpo lando, I know it that there are years before you put a ring on my finger 🌝

landonorris offence taken

ynculpo no offence given 🫷🏻

comments on this post have been restricted

liked by user1, user2, user3 and 87,272 others

f1news Grid drivers and their wags were seen boarding their yatches after the Grand Prix

view comments

user1 might be just going to celebrate the win ?

user2 nah, max would never rather go to sleep

user3 with max loosing and smiling like that- hell no it is not a Grand Prix celebration

user4 calm down, it must be like some lunch get together or something

user5 it might lando’s and max’s wedding 🥹

user6 ofc, with Kelly officiating 🗿

user7 george and carmen have my heart 🥹

user8 charles looks like the rich business dad

user9 he is rich tho-

user10 and alex can bear him a kid so

user11 he already has a kid named bear 🐻

user12 and leo

user13 and oscar

user14 kelly, sweetheart match your foundation like you match your grooming skills

user15 wait till the Dutch man sees this

user16 you have a lawsuit coming up 🔝

user14 it was a joke for legal purposes ofc ☺️

liked by

wagnews Lando Norris and his girlfriend, Y/N Culpo were apparently the last ones to board the cruise 🚢

view comments

user0 they were definitely fuc-

user1 ahhhh body bang 💥

user2 AESPA MENTIONED 🦅🦅

user3 WTF IS A SUPERNOVA !?

user4 lando keeping up his fuckboy title ✊🏻

user5 there is something known as traffic 😭

user6 traffic doesn’t exists in lando’s dictionary 😮‍💨

user7 the amount of sussiness I am getting from this cruise

user8 I second that

user9 I third that

user10 IF ANY F1 DRIVER IS SEEING THIS, TELL US WHAT IS HAPPENING

user11 what if they all are boarding the cruise because of a zombie apocalypse-

user12 WTF, THAT MAKES SENSE

user13 stocking up my buldak ASAP

tg: @lydia-demarek @mel164 @h34rts4maisey @poppyflower-22 @dolphlinda

@ilivbullyingjeongin @fangirlforever2000 @magnusi-97 @clo5406 @yesmanbabe

[i-cant-sing]

What are your thoughts on the yandere haikyuu teams x their manager?

Boring. I need some spice in it. How about-

Yandere Daichi as a cop and his darling is a civilian and now he's so obsessed with her that he murders her husband, frames him as a criminal and will literally stop at nothing to get darling in his arms because again... who will suspect good old, everybody's best bud COP Daichi to be able to do heinous crimes???

Yandere Sugawara as a psychiatrist because come on- he gives major "master manipulator" vibes and now he's obsessed with his darling patient and will continue to do malpractice and gaslight her and prescribe her all the wrong meds until she loses it and he gets to admit it her under his "special care" and now he can play with her mind all day long🤍

Yandere Oikawa is now a pro volleyball athlete and he just saw Ushijima's little sis, the same one he used to bully and even rejected (and ofc, HUMILIATED) when she confessed to him back in highschool. But now Oikawa's obsessed with her and also still hates his nemesis Ushijima, so what's better than killing two birds with one stone??? And Oikawa still has a very devoted fanclub, only now it's larger and more powerful than ever so now he uses them and his socials to peer pressure you into dating him and eventually, marrying him because he ain't getting any younger honey and he needs some cute babies out of you ASAP.

Yandere Kuroo who is the smart IT tech guy at your office but in reality, he has his own cyber security company that he uses to spy on you, controls your entire life through your socials and don't even get me started on your online banking shit. If its any consolation, he's very rich so... yeah. He may not look like a million bucks, but he does have them. In several offshore accounts.

Yandere Kita who somehow ended up as a mafia leader, probably inherited it as family business and he has like severe OCD so he wants everything done to perfection or so help you, you will 1000% end up 6 feet under. Mafia Kita who has this vision of you being the perfect wife, solely based om the one time you offered him your handkerchiefs because he had a nosebleed from stressing too much and now Kita thinks you're an absolute angel and he wont let you destroy that fantasy of his. Seriously. He will pick out your outfits, tell you how to act and all, punish you if he must, but he does love you.

Yandere Ushijima who is a farmer and has decided that the reader whose car broke down and came to his door asking for help, will now be his wife and be a countryside mom to many kids (u can't say no, okay? He wants a big family) and animals! But hey, he's a very caring husband and will massage your feet, give you baths and feed you his homegrown veggies and meals daily once you are round with his babies🥺

Yandere Bokuto who is now a popular politician and he needs an obedient wife to keep up appearances and play the "family man" image up. So he decides to threaten reader who had a one night stand with him, and Bokuto somehow has very intimate images and videos of you and he uses them to get you to marry him. And now he controls every aspect of your life and tells you to do exactly as he says, and he abuses this privilege more as he gets more powerful and you could only imagine the horrors he would inflict on you if he does actually win elections, but you can't run away because again- he has eyes and contacts everywhere.

[papercorgiworld]

Hiii!! Don’t know if you take requests. What about Sirius x reader doing it on a piano . Can’t get the image out of my head. Only if you are okay with writing it.

In theory I still don't take new request because I still have to finish some other ones, but since I'm short on time and inspiration I decided to go with whatever works and it was this very random but lovely request. Big thanks for sending in, sending you lots of love and I hope that you like this!

“No, I did not ruin the piano.”

A Sirius Black imagine

Sirius and you have been frustrated with each other for a while, leading to a surprising situation where you both deal with those frustrations.

Warning: smutty

“You’re such an ass.” You snare at Sirius as he drags you away from the horrible dinner party with all the filthy rich families. He again had managed to ruin everything. You understood why he was acting the way he was. His family and their pureblood mania upset you as well, but you still managed to be diplomatic about it, contrary to Sirius. “Can’t you just behave for once.” You continue and Sirius rolls his eyes annoyed that you’re lecturing him again. You’re both startled when you hear someone snicker in the back of the apparently not so empty room after all. 

“You two argue like a married couple that’s not having enough sex.” Your eyes meet Regulus’ smug ones as he passes you both, gently patting his brother on the shoulder before leaving the room. “Maybe deal with those frustrations rather than bothering everyone else with it.” Regulus smirks as he closes the door behind him. 

Your eyes stay focused on the door through which Regulus had just left. “He's such a stuck up little shit.” Sirius growls and your eyes snap to Sirius. “No. He’s right and you just hate it when other people are right and you’re wrong.” Your tone has Sirius’ blood boiling but he only quirks a brow at you. You purse your lips and lift your chin, before explaining. “It isn’t just your family. Something else is causing you to be this frustrated and you should work it out and not bother others with it.” You cross your arm and stare Sirius down.

Sirius remains calm on the outside while actually raging on the inside. You were not blaming him for everything again, when you were the one driving him insane. “I’m sorry.” His voice is sassy and twisted as he takes a step closer to you. “I’m the frustrated one.” And another step closer, so now he’s towering over you. You take a step back to give yourself some space to come up with a witty comeback but you startle yourself when your behind touches a piano key, sending a single tone through the room.

You look back at the black elegant piano behind you, almost angry that it stood there. When you bring your eyes back to Sirius his smirk makes you roll your eyes. “You’re vibrating with annoyance and frustration. So don’t tell me I’m the problem.” The man in front of you argues and your tongue moves over your lips as you try not to lose your cool. “You. Are. Unbelie-”

Sirius wasn’t thinking. He was sure of it, because no logical thought would have let him do this. In less than a second his hands were on your hips and his lips were hungrily moving over yours. He didn’t want you to start another empty argument, because lately that was all the two of you did and there was never a good ending, never a release. He craved that. All of those frustrations out. Almost feverish both of you move closer to one another, clawing at each other's flesh and clothes, wanting more out of every touch. “What are you doing?” You manage to say in between heavy breaths and animalistic kisses as you move a hand through his hair. “Do you want me to stop?” Sirius’ low voice against your neck in between kisses has you question your sanity. You didn’t want him to stop. Quite the opposite, you wanted more, much more and asap. Your lack of response makes Sirius chuckle in between sloppy kisses. “Then shut up.” He says with a hushed voice, pushing into you and making your ass hit another piano key. 

Sirius pulls you against him and away from the piano. He doesn’t need his family barging in here to demand he play the piano, while all he wanted to do was play with you. Holding you pressed against his chest Sirius leans to close the fallboard, only to place you on it. Seated with Sirius between your legs there is nothing for you to do except for letting the man ravish you. He pushes up your long dress so his hardening bulge is pressed against your soaking panties. His hand grip and almost tear the fabric of your dress covering your chest, exposing your breasts to his sucking and nipping. Soft sounds coming from your lips only encourage him to continue, not holding back any of the lust he’s feeling.

You let yourself rest on the piano, while lazily pulling his shirt in an attempt to get him to take it off. All Sirius had done for the past few weeks was get on your nerves, it was only just that he would be the one to calm your nerves by presenting you with a good view and some release. Finally getting your hints Sirius pulls his shirt over his head with an urgency to have his mouth back on your flesh. Your hand moves over his muscular chest and abdomen. Merlin, his looks make up for a lot of the dumb stuff he says and does. 

His fingers push your panties to the side and enter, working your clit like he’s on a clock, but to him it was the view he was working so hard for. Your face filling with pleasure, your back arching against the piano and your lips slightly parted, just enough to have your moans vibrate perfectly. Gods, I need more of this woman. 

***

You made your way back to the party first, immediately mingling in some pointless chitchat, like you never left the room. Sirius arrived a little later, hoping to not raise any suspicion about your absence. His fingers combing through his hair, hoping it looked as it did before you had moved your fingers through it and tugged at it while he had rushed you to an orgasm, crying his name as he eagerly slammed his hips into yours, eyes never leaving your beautiful and blushed face. 

“Can I still play that piano or did the two of you ruin it?” Regulus whispers only loud enough for Sirius to hear his concern about the piano. Sirius stares his brother down as he offers him a glass of champagne with an amused grin gracing his lips. “No, I did not ruin the piano.” Sirius answers dryly, looking around the room and resting on your figure. “So, you just ruined her.” Regulus states, before taking a sip from his glass, while meeting his brother's annoyed, but confused eyes. “I don’t know why I did that? Why she let me do that?” Sirius obliviousness makes his younger brother chuckle. “Yes, why? So bizarre...” Regulus mocks before leaving his brother to stand alone and wonder about what was really going on between you two. It was only when you looked at him from across the room that he knew.

Word count: 1181

[biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer]

hiii :3!! Could you do a gn!reader x geo one bed left trope pls :3? (IM A SUCKER FOR TJAT DYNAMIC PLS ☹️)

A Lone Respite (Geo x MC/Reader - One Bed)

Hope you enjoy Annonie.

You're in an established relationship with Geode muahahaha

Anyway uhhhhh. Yuh.

- Signed by biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer

Lone: having no companions; solitary or single.

Respite: a short period of rest or relief from something difficult or unpleasant.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

You and Geo had decided...well, you decided — you just had to stubbornly convince him — to go travel places after school. Specifically Japan and possibly parts of Europe.

So when you both finally flew there (on Geo’s private jet of course), it mostly entailed him just taking you to all the fanciest places (because he’s 110% new-money-rich...or old money idk) and just showing you around. 

Most people actually don’t side eye you (because you know how some tourists like to assault the Geishas and all that? I don’t blame the Japanese personally), and some are just happy that A. (at least) one of you two speaks the language and knows the culture well; and B. that you (if not of Japanese descent, which I know is most of you readers), are trying to speak their language. 

I’m 99% sure Geo has Japanese citizenship, so if –when– you get married, you bet your ass you’re getting one as well (muahahaha)

You both are just going to places he knows are good, mostly in the more urban cities, like Tokyo,  until you both decide to visit the more coastal regions.

Geo does not live near the beach, so you’ll have to book out a hotel (this mf will book everything reluctantly lol; he’s not a fan of hotels at all, he probably thinks they’re filthy).

Anyway, after you both just wander around a beach (probs the Ishigaki one idfk), you return to the hotel you guys booked and…well…you get your keys, go to your room and...

One bed.

One single bed (heheheh imagine making your requester suffer couldn’t be me).

And Geo is malding. Very very stoically.

He’s death-staring the bed, a very cold, menacing glint in his ocean eyes.

You’re a bit concerned, because you know Geo isn’t gonna share a bed with you; and annoyed, because now Geo was probably gonna lose his McMarbles™.

So, you both take your stuff and leave to the reception (mostly him stalking out, vehement ornery in the rigidity of his posture).

You stayed behind to watch over your things, in case Geo deemed this place unworthy and dragged you both out.

And, well, that’s exactly what happened.

He came back and proceeded to bluntly state you’re leaving.

“We’re going, they refunded us.”

“Geo what-”

So you both go somewhere else, because, apparently, they didn’t have other rooms to spare with a double bed, then the staff started claiming he hadn’t even paid for it, so he got his money-decked ass (and yours) outta there ASAP.

Anyway, by the time you get to another hotel, Geo states, in Japanese, something that seemed formal, at least it sounded formal, you didn’t know lmfao.

Due to the fact it was getting later in the night, and Geo is a very big fan of beauty sleep, the first thing he does is check the bed.

A n o t h e r   v e r y   l o n e l y   b e d. (can we have 100 likes for the lonely bed thank you😔)

At least it was a queen sized bed this time.

It takes 27 minutes of pure debate, but you convince Geo to just sleep, because you’re both tired —and you told him people who get stressed get wrinkles and he doesn’t want those lol–.

So he pulls out one of those weird lights that reveal stains on bedsheets and whatnot (you know those janky ones that people use to check if their bed is actually clean or not?). And he’s *very* paranoid about cleanliness. He hates dirt.

Thank God the bed is actually clean, so Geo immediately unpacks the bare necessities and steals the bathroom (dw he already checked it as well it’s clean).

Yeah bro I’m sorry this man won’t let you wash up before him.

He might even be a germaphobe tbh.

Anyway, after his very long, very amazing skincare routine and shower, Geo emerges, his hair loosely falling down his lanky frame (omg omg omg bark bark woof?!?!?!?!!?!?!).

He tells you to hurry up and usurps a side of the bed (probably the one nearest to the restroom so he can freshen up bright and early).

So when you shower and get out of the restroom, he’s telling you to sleep. (also btw, he’s gonna crack all his joints before sleeping, he probably even meditates, so be quiet when you’re in the restroom).

You better make sure to not snore or kick in your sleep though, this man will throw you off the bed if he has to, sleep is superior to relationships for him (such a mood tbh).

But usually when it comes to one bed, he’s gonna take it from you. (He’d have to really like you to share a bed with you in the first place).

If you are the type to get nervous when sleeping in an unfamiliar place though? He’ll “reluctantly” offer his arms and you squish into him. (don’t push it guys I know it’s tempting ngh)

He’ll also be the type to go to a buffet (there is definitely gonna be one, he refuses to go to anyplace that doesn’t have one, especially in the more remote areas of any country).

So expect, when he wakes you up at like 7am, to be served food at a table. He won’t allow eating in bed, both from the fact it’s weird to him and also just…what if you drop some food or something??? He’d get embarrassed on your behalf…

But after that funny time is over, you both continue to traverse Japan, deciding to put that time behind you. Well, Geo does. You 110% are gonna try and sleep in his arms more often now. >:)

[eff-plays]

I think a few months back you said a lot of AA stans are Russian women because of the fantasy of a powerful man taking care of and providing for you. What did you mean by this? I'm not being accusatory at all and I'm sorry if I sound like it. I just don't know anything about Russian society and stuff and now I'm curious.

Umm it was mostly a joke tbh, so don't take it too seriously!

But a lot of Russian women I know (and I've known a few, given that I uh, was born there, and identified as a woman until I was like 19) are heavily materialistic and look for wealthy men to provide for them. And I'm not saying this as like ... an insult or an accusation? It's just that Russia is a shithole, it's deeply misogynistic, patriarchal, and a lot of the culture tells young women that their main priority in life should be to work hard, get sexy, catch a rich man, and squeeze out babies ASAP. And because Russia is a shithole as previously mentioned, it makes plenty of sense for many women to prioritize finding someone who can provide for them. The culture also very much tells them that a man can be as shitty as he wants, but as long as he's got cash, he's still attractive, and she's still doing better than all those single/poor women. A powerful man can basically make living in Russia less shitty.

And many of them internalize this, and bring the mindset into more Western settings, be it physical or digital, as it were.

As I said, it was mostly a joke, but given how Russian AA stans often focus on his material wealth, perceived "masculinity," and how they want to be his sexy plastic housewife who can get away with anything she wants because of her husband's connections and authority ... Well. If the shoe fits, ya know? It matches the mentality of many Russian women (not all!! but a lot of those I've known) where if they have enough power, they're essentially allowed to do whatever they want, lord over whomever they please, and since you come from a heavily patriarchal society, the likelihood of you getting that power is slim to none, unless you marry an important, wealthy man. AA stans just have that whiff of a hunger for power that I find is very familiar, disguised as/or genuinely expressed through an obsession with AA. It's a different flavor of a power fantasy that is just kinda sad, to me.

It doesn't help that so many AA wifeys look just ... very quintessentially Eastern European. They've got that Slav Chic.

Now this isn't like ... me diagnosing every Russian woman with dictator kinks or every AA stan with Russian, but again, it was a joke about a trend I observed. Plenty of spawn stans are also Russian.

[mzannthropy]

I've been dreading Chapter 42, not bc it's bad--on the contrary!--but bc I knew I would have an unpopular opinion. So *deep breaths* here it is:

I don't like how LMM dealt with the Ethel Traverse situation. I don't like that the reason for the break up was that Ethel was only after his money. It's cheap and lazy!

What I would have preferred instead is Ethel dumping him for a different guy, or Barney dumping her after she laughed at that sketch in the paper, dismissing his feelings, telling him to "get over it, it's just a sketch". Basically, I hate when any fiction does that "woman evil bc she wants to marry rich" thing. It's tired and overdone. And also misogynistic. I mARry hIM bc I LUUURVE Him nOt FoR hIs mOnEy, shut up, no woman is obliged to marry a broke loser. Men marry women for money and don't apologise for that.

College-era Barney was not the Barney we know and love. What made him be what he is now is leaving home and living in the wilderness. He didn't like who he was, so he went away and worked on himself, instead of turning into a bitter incel. We always need stories like that. Ethel could have just married someone else and lived happily ever after.

It seems to me that LMM simply chose the laziest way out here. Maybe she just needed to finish the novel asap, she was writing this and Emily's Quest at the same time. I don't know. It's also not like her. In the Anne series, Jane Andrews expresses her wish to be rich--and she marries a rich man and is happy. The "I don't want sunbursts and marblehalls" from Anne x Gilbert proposal doesn't mean that Gilbert will be forever poor--he's studying to be a doctor. LMM knew the importance of money; her publisher was ripping her off and she was the main breadwinner in her marriage, yet it was her husband's profession that determined where they'd live.

So that's just my thoughts.

[multishipper-baby]

religious trauma eakwynn au? tell me more

So the AU goes like this: Eak is having trouble living on his own because of the cost of living and shit (they're older in this AU- around 25 years old) so he moves back in with his parents. Thing is, his parents are very religious and deeply care about their reputation at their local church, so they only let him in with the condition that he'll go to church with them every Sunday. Eak doesn't believe in God anymore but doesn't have many options for living arrangements , so he accepts.

Meanwhile Owynn also has a very religious family that he's stuck with. His parents are filthy rich, but they'll disown him if he comes out and he hasn't managed to fulfill his dreams of being a musician, so he doesn't want to risk ending up with no money if they find out the truth. So, instead, he becomes a priest- it's a good way to stay on their good graces without having to get married to a woman, and it gives him power over other people since now the congregation sees him as an authority figure. It's a win/win.

However, being repressed 100% of the time is exhausting, so he occasionally sneaks out into a gay bar to dress up all GNC and hit on random man to satisfy his impulses. And what do you know! On one of those nights, he and Eak randomly meet. They dance, have a couple of drinks, hook up and then move on thinking that they might never see each other again.

...Until the exact next day, when Eak shows up at Owynn's church and the two immediately recognize each other. Owynn is basically dying inside as Eak's mom introduces them and asks him to please guide her poor son who's walked away from God and blah blah blah. They very awkwardly shake hands and try to avoid looking suspicious in front of everyone.

Once they aren't surrounded by people that could get them in trouble, they have a talk. It's clear that they have similar problems surrounding their families, even if Owynn is in much more trouble than Eak is. So, they form an ally ship, which turns into a friendship, which turns into a forbidden romance.

From then on conflict happens- I've thought of two possible ways this could go. Either 1- Eak manages to move out and slowly works towards helping untangle Owynn from his awful family so he can finally leave the church and live the life he wants to live or 2- Eak gets pregnant and now the two of them need to figure a plan ASAP before it becomes noticeable and they both get found out. Very dramatic lmao.

[haintxblue]

had a dream I was married to a rich man who looked like dev Patel. We were opening a lemonade company that profit shared 100% with the employees and was founded on leftist principles. Our office had a ceiling mural of a stylized pastel dinosaur fossil dig. He was in love with me and always reaching for my hand. I was dyeing hair as a fun hobby on the side and his white-haired mother was letting me dye her hair purple and pink and we were all laughing. I was pretty and aging gracefully. Please send me back to that world asap.

[teenmomcentral]

David Eason may have been kicked to the curb by wife Jenelle Evans, but the fired Teen Mom 2 dad is reportedly staying afloat-– which is (almost) more than we can say about the broken down boat on which he’s currently living. 

David recently told Celebuzz that he’s doing just fine without his lip sync-challenged Lady ‘o’ Land and is “so much happier and healthier” now that the two are separated. 

“The stress I was under was making me physically sick,” he said. “I’m so glad I don’t have to wake up to extreme anxiety every morning now.” 

As The Ashley previously told you, Jenelle recently filed to legally separate from David after seven years of marriage, countless 911 calls and enough online bickering to fill the tumultuous couple’s swampy swimming pool at least twice. 

In her filing, Jenelle provided a laundry list of reasons she wants out of her marriage to David, including what she claims is “concerning and disturbing behavior” spurred by David’s “excessive alcohol use”; his habit of excessively spending her money; and regularly drinking and driving– just to name a few.  

While North Carolina requires married couples to be legally separated (and living separately) for a year before they are granted a divorce, David–-who has been living on the couple’s broken boat, which is docked at a nearby marina–- insists he’s ready to sign divorce papers ASAP.

In response to Jenelle accusing him of “constantly” talking about her on social media recently, David argues that he and his talkin’ words have done nothing wrong.

“I’ve only said things that are completely facts and haven’t exposed any of my evidence other than things she was already aware of,” he said. “I’ve been very strategic with my words.”

Some of David’s “strategic words” regarding Jenelle have included allegations that the mom of three has been cheating on him for years, she’s controlling and has isolated him from friends and family. Jenelle recently accused him online of cheating with his ex-wife (and first baby mama) Whitney Rich, but David told Celebuzz that his past texts with Whitney were innocent—unlike what Jenelle’s been allegedly doing behind his back.

“That’s not cheating but I have mountains of evidence about her cheating,” he said. 

“She cheated on me with dozens of guys and I have all the evidence,” David added, although Celebuzz cleverly pointed out that David “did not provide any of said evidence at this time” to the site.

David stated that it pains him to think of Jenelle wanting to have another man use her debit card.

“It’s been the hardest thing in the world to look her in the face after years knowing she was telling other men that she wanted them to come to my house to be with her,” David said, adding, “She’s been ready for a new man to move in for a long time. Telling them how I’m such a piece of s**t in so many ways.”

As The Ashley told you earlier this week, despite being separated, Jenelle and David have been keeping their local sheriff’s office busy lately by making multiple calls, several of which resulted in trips to Jenelle’s home on The Land last week to deal with “family issues” between the former swampmates. 

In another incident report from over the weekend, Jenelle stated that David has been harassing her since she filed for separation in late February and mentioned that he had also been taking her things. 

[missdollytheog]

Maybe he told her about his intentions and she said fuck it I want a ring and if you won’t give it to me fuck off? She wants to get married to a rich man asap as she’s still not a citizen of any state and she needs to rely on someone.

That sounds quite harsh if it came from her 😂 surely they would have talked about it before they got together.. I still think it was FWB and now they just move on

[chaimaybe]

So a while ago I read this book- its by Anne bronte: The tenant of wildfell hall. I have also read this other book by another Bronte sister: Jane Eyre. And damn bro the female Protagonists, Jane and helen are so exact mirrors of each other. There's this famous quote in JE "I would always rather be happy than dignified" AND IM SO SO SURE that Helen would say she'd rather be dignified than happy.

(Spoilers ahead)

Their stories are mirrors as well. Jane meets Richardson who's hiding his wife in the attic of his house and is very ready and very eager to marry jane regardless. On the other hand- Helen meets huntingdon and this guy marries her and then flaunts his mistress (his friend's wife at that) in front if her.

Jane after finding out runs away asap. Helen stays. She is okay with whatever is going on as long as nothing happens to her son. She is very uptight in the sense. She has very questionable values that I'm sure won't sit right with many modern women. Jane on the other hand is very much like the modern woman. She acts on her on right and is not afraid to defy norms.

Helen STICKS BY THEM. she's so so into fulfilling "her duty as a wife" that she; after running away from her abusive, cheating, drunkard, gambler of a husband; GOES RIGHT BACK TO HIM BECAUSE APPRENTLY HE WAS BEING STUPID AND HURT HIMSELF REALLY BAD AND IS ABOUT TO DIE. I would very much let that bastard die and so would jane honestly.

Helen knew about his drinking problems before marrying that guy- but she pulled a "I can fix him" not even kidding- there's a direct quote even (victorianized ofcourse) Jane on the other hand just goes "I'm leaving bitvh"

The endings are so different as well: richardson does manage to fix himself. Huntingdon obviously does not and while Helen has a "happy ending" its not with her first choice. She fixed nothing by being a nice wife who nicely does housework and nicely sits around waiting for her cheating husband to come home (again, she'd rather be dignified than happy)

She (with her son) had to go out and fend for themselves with her paintings while dealing with living in a new town whose people were very superstitiously wary of a widow (a lie she said for convenience because a wife who runs away from her cheating husband is even more of a sin) Jane very conveniently had a rich uncle die when she left Richardson and she inherited his whole fortune (not saying she did not have struggles- but still)

It's also interesting to note that Richardson and huntingdon both are said to be modeled after Branwell bronte. Anne and Charlotte's brother, who had an opium addiction and also was in an affair with the mistress of the house he worked in. Anne worked with branwell over there and had firsthand experience of his madness that very very much affected her. Charlotte was more of a distant observer but she knew of what was going on.

Now why am I even mentioning this? Because they're both in a way feminist but in such different manners. Jane eyre: with its strong heroine and whatnot. And a proper happy ending. Tenant of wildfell hall: with its prim proper heroine with long religious monologues. who got roped in by another not so perfect man who very much almost killed another man (her brother) and did not feel an ounce of remorse until he learned that he was Helen's brother. That was her "happy ending" after huntingdon.

It is so so apparent why tenant is considered feminist. It's more of a cautionary tale (though i wont deny that helen is a strong person as well) Jane Eyre, while I love it so so much, is far from being very rational, especially with the whole richardson situation. Works in a novel, wont in real life. Tenant kind of shows that bitterness. Of how women are content with even a smithering of kindness after being mistreated so badly.

Reminds me of the dolls house by Henrik ibsen

[kiyoomology]

27 years ☆ richie tozier

genre: angst and fluff warnings: none summary: you and your husband recieve a call from mike hanlon, asking you to return to derry.

there was never a silent night in los angeles, but tonight, it felt like you and richie lucked out.

the only noise that was hitting your ears was richie’s soft breathing, and the beatles music he had turned on hours earlier that neither of you had bothered to turn off when you moved into bed.

your hands carded through richie’s curls, untangling the knots and smoothing the raven strands between your fingers.

“did i ever tell you how much i love you?” richie mumbled from where his head rested against you chest. you let out a small laugh, removing his glasses from where they were lying askew on his face.

“every day, rich.” you reply gently, a smile finding its way to your lips as richie cuddled himself further into your side. 

silence enveloped you two again, until the phone rang.

you sighed heavily, removing your hands from richie’s hair and making the man groan.

“i gotta get the phone, rich.” you say, patting his head as he pouts at you like a child.

he mercifully let you go, and you exited your bedroom  and went into the kitchen, where you had abandoned your phone. your brows furrowed at the contact name.

who the hell did you know in derry, maine?

“you got outta bed for a fucking telemarketer?” richie asked from behind you, making you jump at his sudden voice.

“it could be important.” you mumbled, answering the phone as richie wrapped you into a hug. you melted against his chest, then realized you needed to talk to the person on the other end of the line.

“hello, y/n tozier speaking.” you said, stealing a kiss from richie as you waited for their reply.

“you and the trashmouth got married?” came a deep voice that you feel that you should recognize, but you don’t.

“i’m sorry, who is this?” you asked, not missing the way richie looked down at you in confusion.

“oh, right. it’s mike hanlon, from derry. you might not remember me, but IT’s back.” he said quickly, his explanation not answering the many questions you had for him.

“you and richie need to be in derry asap. i’ve already called the other losers.” he continued before you could get in a reply. before you could question him further, the line went dead.

suddenly, you felt like a truck hit you, and your whole body froze.

“toots, who was that?” richie asked, and you looked up at him. you almost sob as you see the concerned look in his eyes.

“mike hanlon. IT’s back, richie.” you whispered, and richie’s face paled.

“fuck.” he said simply, pulling you closer to his chest as you let your tears spill down your cheeks.

richie held you as you cried, violently, which was a horribly depressing contrast to the joyous mood the two of you held not five minutes ago.

“we have to go back. we made a promise.” you said after a bit, and richie frowned.

“you sure, toots?” he asked, and you forced a shaky smile onto your face as richie placed a chaste kiss to your forehead.

“as long as you’re with me, i’ll be alright.”

[ruby-whistler]

i made a list of the vibes of the hermits i watch, so you might want to check some of them out! this is just mostly jokes, but i thought all of the more “serious” propaganda was missing something, so have what truly makes hermitcraft worth it; the players’ unique styles!

will be back on my dsmp stuff asap but it’s the first day of season 8 and i would really appreciate if you checked them out through the links provided :]

Grian; [ episode one link ]

vibes of a 17 year old mcyter, is actually 27 and married

noo not my red jumpah!

chaotic capitalist

someone is making the server better through order? *starts another war* whoops, hand slipped :D

he built a- he rebuilt his entire megabase in survival, above a giant lake of lava, in the nether, on hard mode, upside down??

“watching as scar dies over and over in my trap is peak comedy and i’m tired of pretending it’s not” but it happens like 5 times i every season

video editing is very main-stream and good for short attention spans!

*sad montage over losing stuff he’ll get back in 15 minutes because he’s rich*

pesky birdd! great elytra flier! amazing builder! will tnt your house! poultrymannn!!

wholesome, chaos incarnate, talented architect

why won’t mumbo respond to my messages it’s been two weeks :[ (clingy)

doors???????????? your house has doors???? no doors for you good sir!

will laugh a lot at a lot of things, esp when he’s with his friends

genuinely just so fun to watch

Mumbo Jumbo; [ episode one link ]

perfect british accent

mustache man (warning: he has no mustache irl)

*fails ten businesses in a row* iskall please help

redstone is his element

“it’s actually quite simple” i like your funny words magic man, now can you repeat how in the hell you made a that fancy vault work-

filmographer?? i think? met up with grian irl

him and grian have a robot son named grumbot. that has nothing to do with the vibes but i had to mention him because he means a lot to me.

tries to stay out of wars and server politics until someone (grian) drags him into them

minigame maker, makes the hermits competitive and that is scary (also very funny) e. g. button, hermit challengesss!

“it’ll be fineee” *que shot of everything on fire behind him*

makes his base a living being and then all his neighbors end up feeding it instead of him

conspiracy theorist. bumbo baggins. the usual.

very entertaining videos that help you learn more about minecraft mechanics!

GoodTimesWithScar; [ episode one link ]

wheelchair creator with literally the best vibes

so wholesome i. he is so cool he makes me so happy :’D

*extremely cool announcer voice* ooooo hello there my fellow miners and crafters, good timeees with scar heree, and welcome backk to the wonderful world of hermits and crafting, and we’re flying over-

commentates everything extremely well

spends tenths of hours on builds within a single video and doesn’t bat an eye

lore for all of his builds! he builds these amazing bases to tell a story!

“i wanna see white flags! white flags, outside your base, by-“ wait no wrong anti-rebellion army leader

all videos have a clear objective

mostly building, but he loves hanging out/helping his friends!

loves disney movies! wants to go to space! :D

kind-hearted, always makes everyone else smile

can be chaotic but usually just tries to have fun and make sure everyone else has fun too

*flies into a tree on half a heart* wait what why did i die D:

scar. scar please eat. you’re going to die for the tenth time this video-

the non-chaotic capitalist, has extremely creative shop designs

a danger to himself, but also the kind of person you can’t be angry at for long

BdoubleO100; [ episode one link ]

the guitar music at the beginning of his videos brings a smile to my face, it just has such an immaculate mood

*camera pans over him as said music plays* ladies and gentlemen welcome to another episode of hoimycraffff

the way he talks is extremely endearing

one of the best builders on the server - probably best builder of interiors in existence

able to make a palette using any number of strange blocks and then make amazing builds using it

built a whole castle as a backdrop, then built an entire giant mountain for said castle

extremely sensitive to short jokes, usually gets pranked by others because his reactions are always so funny

his daughters show up from time to time in his room while he’s recording and it’s so cute

*has no way to see the sun but still knows it’s nighttime* gotta go schleep!

scar, pointing at him “this is why we can’t have nice sunsets”

(scar dies because of mobs every time bdubs isn’t on the server to sleep)

likes to be accomplice because he isn’t the one being made fun of (/lh)

*shoots himself in front of a confused grian because he thinks the guy wants his face again when he’s actually just looking for a netherportal*

is usually the underdog so it feels good when he wins

they’re all actually such great friends so it’s genuinely funny to watch

he himself is amazing at entertainment and just a very cool guy

ImpulseSV; [ episode one link ]

what’s going on everyone, my name is impulse and welcome back to hermitcraft!

always speaks with a smile in his voice

has a good dynamic with basically everyone

great co-worker and always helps out if he can

had his base turned pink during the swap, and instead of changing it back afterwards, he dyed his skin’s hair and clothing pink to match it

very cool and original building style!

makes a lot of farms and sells what he gets in his few shops

makes money to be able to do more stuff and make more farms

blows up most his base ever so often to rebuild parts. you know, like a normal person does in minecraft survival.

the grind is never over

the guy who always gets all of the work done on the school project and proceeds to be chill about it

always has very cool side-projects going on and puts his heart into all of them

pog timelapses!!

Rendog; [ episode one link ]

*short, funny scene from the video at the beginning slowly fades out into great music

dogs howling as the half-dog half-cog logo comes up*

greetiiings cyberdogs and citizens of the interbubs! this is ren diggity dawg coming atcha, in another minecraft episodes varuuummm the hermit. craft. server. (hey!)

we’re kicking things off today my friends, from the- *location name on screen*

that intro gets me hyped every time

he’s a furry who talks in bro language it’s great i swear - very atypical but fun

he transformed an entire biome into a star wars planet for his base

his building skills and dedication are incredible

horny (just a little bit)

the only person who cared about mycelium in the whole rebellion

does a lot of roleplay-themed stuff and mysteries to be solved

“b-dubba-dubs one hundred”

extremely upbeat & sweet guy

adds -age after everything “biddage” “flyage” to make it sound Cooler

amazingly positive always and funny as hell

mcc winner!! wooooooooo :D

always tries to be where stuff is happening and interact with people

very entertaining editing style

Iskall85; [ episode one link ]

drives joke into the mud and then picks them up and does it again which is funny

starts videos with one-off bits

iskallman!!! the superhero literally no one needed and yet there he is

only has one (1) braincell when with mumbo

they both do and they’re hilarious together every time

like when they laughed at squeaky noises for ten minutes straight. guys please you’re adult men

bernie the leaf master

omega (something) of doom!!

encourages gambling (in a videogame)

he has so many jokes he keeps using i can’t possibly fit them all in here

basically a wildcard

i have no idea what he’s doing this season

i have no idea what he’s doing ever actually

tame chaos, confusing to the point when it’s funny again

really great builder as well!

mostly for younger audiences but his videos are a good watch in general

feel free to send asks about hc! i’m already loosely involved in hermitblr but yeah, my dsmp followers aren’t immune :] /lh /j

[thekatebridgerton]

I think people tend to forget how much the word BASTARD affected a person in that time, there's a part where Sophie mentiones that the kids didn't want to play with her bc THEY KNEW she wasn't legitimate, Sophie herself say that the problem is not being Ben's mistress but the results of being a mistress, the child won't be rejected by his parents but he'll be rejected by everyone else and THAT can mess up the child's head just like it did to Sophie, she doesn't want that for her own children

This is also a good point. A very good point.

I'm not saying think about Jon Snow in game of thrones and what a big deal they make out of him being a bastard. But it's the closest example I can think of.

I can't imagine the children of a Viscount's brother and his mistress being as well received anywhere as the children of a Viscount's brother and HIS WIFE. Benedict and Sophie's children would have had it hard everywhere even if Benedict did legitimize them.

And you know just between you and me, I have this theory that Bridgerton men don't have the guts to follow trough with their bad ideas (Anthony realistically wouldn't have married Edwina even without Kate's intervention)

I think Benedict realistically would have lasted a month or two with Sophie as his mistress before saying 'F the Ton, f respectability, f everything' and marrying her anyway. Because Benedict was an idiot but he wouldn't have let Sophie be the victim of the usual trash talk that comes with mistresshood. His resolve would have broken faster than lighting the moment he heard Sophie being slandered or the first time some other rich guy tried to tempt his mistress Sophie into leaving him.

Because guess what Benedict? Mistresses can leave, they can totally take all the gifted jewels and vacate premises if they want to. You thought about that right? Sophie might get fed up, or another dudebro could show up and there wouldn't be any legally binding document in all regency england that said she belonged in My Cottage with you.

So yeah I certainly don't think Ben would have stuck with the arrangement for long, least of all enough time for a child to be born out of wedlock. As soon as the mistress he's very much inlove with told him she was pregnant, Benedict would have thrown the towel, marched her to the Archbishop and forced Sophie to make an honest man out of him. Benedict is still a Bridgerton raised by Violet, realistically he'd never allow any child of his to be shunned or humiliated.

He's a remotely self aware guy, we all know the mistress proposal thing was because he was too lazy to fetch the Archbishop himself and wanted to bang Sophie ASAP. But truth is Benedict is weak for Sophie He fell inlove with her at first sight and didn't forget her for two years. He would have married her ASAP as soon as he could. Even if she had agreed to be his mistress under duress. But just because we as readers know that Benedict is an idiot with the backbone of a chocolate eclair doesn't mean that Sophie does so we support her in sticking to her guns until Benedict wisened up.

Still, Benedict had to go about it the hard way and propose while Sophie was in jail so there's that.

I mean just look at this face: Does this look like the kind of guy who would last a week with a mistress like Sophie? Let alone more than 9 months

[latenightbreezeinheaven]

Manifestation✍🏻💭💬

I suddenly wanted to get these things out of my head, so I'm going to tell you about my personal story related to manifestation and it's specifically about "accidentally manifesting random things and realizing after all those events" so yeah let's get started.

About two months ago, I read this book called "girl online" by Joe Suggs (don't attack me for reading this please because people in goodreads app were kinda aggressive about it and idk why though). And whatever, if you've already read this book, you would know the whole plot but if you haven't yet, I'll tell you a short summary about it. There is this girl from London who had to accompany with her parents to New York as her parents were responsible to hold the wedding of this another rich couple. Then, in New York, she met this kinda ghetto-gothic styled young man (idk lol I still can't visualize his appearance till now) who could sing well and who could play the instruments. Then, as you've guessed, they fell in love and the book went on like that. After reading that book, I had this strong urge to have this kind of boyfriend who could sing well (kinda like a singer) and who could play the instruments and I had been thinking about it everyday like "omg I wish I had this type of boy in my life" "I'm not getting a boyfriend until I meet someone like him" and things like that. At that time, those were just simple intrusive thoughts but cheesy feelings also kinda followed through those thoughts unnoticeably. And about two weeks later after reading that book, I met this guy through the internet who could sing well and who could play the instruments. He is not a famous singer but he is really good at singing. We talked and talked and now we are still friends but I know he's my soulmate. I can just feel it. He's going to be "the one" for me in the very near future. Periodt. 💅 And this can be said to be some kind of miracles because we met on an app (not a dating app) and we were matched randomly out of those millions or thousands of users who were using that app at that same time. Is this a coincidence? No, I don't think so.

Another personal experience: So, I am fond of creating pinterest pins and boards almost all the time. And about two months ago, this song "beautiful in white" was stuck in my head so I decided to make a particular board fulled with wedding photos. I am a Buddhist and the photos I saved were the Christian wedding ones. I will attach one of those photos underneath to make things clearer. It was not intentional, actually, I just had this sudden desire to quickly add those Christian wedding photos in a board because those were so beautiful and made me want to get married asap lol. And guess what? That guy I met on the internet. His religion is Christianity!! Maybe this is just a coincidence for others but for me, it's not.

I experience these types of synchronicities quite often and I also have encountered other really spooky ones too. The thing that I want to remind you all is to be aware of what you do and how you act in your daily life. That doesn't mean you need to restrict your feelings, emotions and routines but be careful with who you talk to, who you share your energy with, which movies you watch, which songs you listen to, which kinds of thoughts you let into your head, which photos you save into your gallery and small things like that. You won't actually believe me when I say this but everytime after I've listened to sad and breakup songs on loop for about a week, something that breaks my heart happens. I started to notice this about four months ago. I also watched "friends wih benefits" movie about a year ago and I felt fascinatei with the idea of it unintentionally. Then, I met my ex-crush who wanted me as a fwb. I have already cut him off though. I also want to say not to underestimate some scripting methods because I made 12 scripts on the full moon day in last October, I guess and I just realized that 5 of them already became true including my exam marks. But a big BUT also remember that thoughts ALONE cannot manifest into reality. So, you don't need to worry about your negative thoughts manifesting into reality because they won't. You need thoughts, feelings, actions and faith to manifest. (credit to the book "Make it happen" by Jordanna Levin) *if you're the one who's manifesting a sp, please don't read this whole book. Skim some parts even if you want to read because some of the contents are opposed to the topic of manifesting a sp so yeahh umm*

My thoughts are kind of complicated at this point, so I might make some grammar mistakes or create some confusions in this post but please understand me because English is not my mother language. I hope that guy doesn't use Tumblr and see this post because if he did, he would freak out af LMAO 😂. Thank you for sticking to the end and yeah buh-bye pretty bees!! 🐝💛

P.S. OMG I just realized that I also listened to this song in our country which contained some lyrics about going together to the church as a couple and making agreements for a wedding, on a loop for several months. Oh-My-Gawd.

One of the pictures I saved in my Pinterest board-