#maximum schmoop

[ladymacbethsspot]

How excited are you for animated smol Levi?

((I am so excited Anon. So, so, very excited. Have a drabble. It’s only vaguely related, but your ask made me think of it.))

“Oh, I’m just so happy you both were able to come visit!”Mrs. Ackerman’s voice trilled from the kitchen behind them, the soft shushingand gentle clink of teacups and shelves accompanying the joyful notes.

“Yeah, well,” Levi answered, still looking flustered fromthe bone-crushing hug his mother had greeted him with, “you know. Petra andOluo still live here for some reason. Can’t pass up their invitation.” Erwinscooted closer to his husband on the couch, wrapping an arm around his waist. Despitethe obvious ill-ease Levi always slipped into in Kuchel’s tiny home, Erwinfound it welcoming, warm, and spotless, if somewhat out of the way.

“Of course not!” Kuchel admonished, the perfectly-timedwhistle of the kettle signaling tea and shortbread cookies. The best shortbreadcookies, as Erwin remembered- firm, but melt-in-your mouth, andbuttery-beyond-belief. “But if it takes a wedding to get you two back out here,then I’ll have to start setting your old friends up! How about Eld? Is hesingle? Gunther?” With tray in hand, Kuchel entered the room, placing tea andcookies on the coffee table as she sat down next to Levi.

Before anyone could reach for refreshments Kuchel wasleaning over Levi eagerly, smiling at Erwin. “Do you know any nice girls? Orboys? I don’t want to assume, but if that’s what it takes, I’d set that EldGinn boy up with a tree!”

Erwin chuckled, shaking his head. “No, Mrs. Ackerman, unfortunatelyI don’t know anyone that’s eligible right now- man, woman, or tree.”

“Oh, poop.” Kuchel frowned prettily, her graceful eyebrowsdrawing together in a way that made Erwin’s heart clench- just like Levi. “WellI’ll just have to make the most of it while you’re here!” She leaned over,rummaging under the coffee table as Levi sat back into the couch and groaned. Alarge album emerged, stuffed with more pages than it could hold, the strainclear in the tendons of Kuchel’s thin arms as she pulled it from beneath thetable and offered it to Erwin. “Let’s start with this. What good is having yourson and his handsome husband over for the weekend if you can’t embarrass him alittle?” The cheeky wink that followed the statement made Erwin grin evenharder- he’d been looking forward to this almost as much as the shortbread:Ackerman family photos.

They came out every time he’d visited, and though Levi hadgotten less red and huffy with each occurrence, it hadn’t lost its charm yet.The arms still crossed instantly, lines between thin brows growing deeper asLevi tried to fold himself into the couch. Erwin took the album, opening itover both his and Levi’s lap, letting it fall to whatever page it would, secretsand hints at distant pasts spilling out.

Levi in a soccer uniform, his knees and high socks coveredin grass and mud stains, scowling at the camera. “Oh, he was so good atsoccer,” his mother breathed, tracing the curve of young Levi’s face with athin, small finger. “Though I couldn’t go to many games, I was too sick then.”Her nail lingered, the fine lines at the edges of her eyes showing for a momentas she blinked quickly.

“Who took the photo?” Erwin asked.

“Probably Kenny.” Kuchel leaned in, studying the frownchild-Levi was making in the photo. “Definitely Kenny. That face.” She smiled,barely a quirk of thin lips. Erwin’s breath caught- like mother, like son.

Turning the page, Erwin found more photos. There was noorder to the album, something he’d always loved. Each page unpredictable in itstimeline, a mystery unfolding through mere glimpses and literal snapshots. Allstrung together in a haphazard smattering, the good right next to the bad. Itwas a precious thing; the most honest book Erwin had ever seen.

Levi didn’t talk about his childhood, and Erwin had gatheredthrough overheard shouting matches with his uncle and hushed conversations withdoctors over his mother’s health that it hadn’t been the easiest. Still,looking at a surprisingly chubby-cheeked baby-Levi swaddled in a blue blanketin Kuchel’s arms as she gave the camera a weak but genuine smile, Erwin knew ithad been full of love.

“I look awful there,” Kuchel murmured.

“You look fine, Mom.”

The quiet words surprised Erwin, and he turned to see thatLevi was looking at the photos too. Grey eyes trained on his mother, she lookedso young in the baby photo. Erwin wondered if Levi saw himself in her- healways had. Their similar complexions and small statures were obvious, but themannerisms they shared gave the likeness dimension. To Erwin it was charmingand incredibly endearing, but it was difficult to read Levi in situations likethis- impossible to know what memories the photos dredged up from hidden depths.

Erwin noticed the tightness in Levi’s leg next to his, howLevi’s lower lip pinched in- he was biting it. Reaching beneath the album,Erwin’s hand sought between them until it came to rest on Levi’s thigh, givinga small squeeze as he turned the page again.

A family photo this time- everyone dressed in what lookedlike a slightly-ragged Sunday best. Levi was probably in middle school, grown enoughthat his rumpled grey slacks didn’t quite cover bare ankles. Hair parted andslicked to within an inch of its life, he stared straight at the camera,expressionless. Kuchel stood behind him, wearing a simple dress, barely tallerthan her son even at his young age. Uncle Kenny towered over them both,frowning and dark, his face not quite as lined or leathery as Erwin remembered,but still craggy. There was another person in the photo, a very old man Erwindid not recognize.

“That’s Grandpa Ackerman. Levi’s great-grandfather,” shesaid, pointing out the elderly man. “And Kenny. You know him.” She sighed, theonly hint at displeasure Erwin had ever seen her give in to. “Levi was soskinny as a child, you’d hardly know he nearly ate me out of house and home.”She picked up the plate of cookies from the tray, offering them in an amusingcontrast. Erwin took two before she placed them back on the table. “He didn’tgrow any of these muscles until high school- thank god he at least got theAckerman strength, even if he got stuck with my height.” She emphasized herpoint with a sharp poke to Levi’s abdomen.

“Thanks, Mom,” Levi deadpanned, clearly unamused.

“Well, Mrs. Ackerman, I’m glad he did.”

“Did what?” she asked.

“Get your height. It suits him,” Erwin added.

Kuchel beamed. “Doesn’t it?”

Erwin could almost feel the sheer force of will Levi exertedto not roll his eyes as the man stared blankly down at the book before them. Suppressinga chuckle, Erwin waited for his husband’s mood to thaw while Kuchel ignored it-paging absently through the book. School photos, candid shots with friends, aglimpse of what might have been a high school dance with friends, and grouppictures taken at holidays. They contained no vacations, nothing staged by aprofessional, and few family members appearing besides Kuchel and Kenny.

It didn’t matter, these were special moments, nonetheless-the shining gems of Levi’s rare smile, a tiny family looking happy and whole,friends who brought them joy. As the pages slipped by the years did too, andErwin saw it mirrored in the subtlest changes on Kuchel and Levi’s faces.

They fell quiet. Looking. And seeing.

After a few moments Mrs. Ackerman took a deep breath andstood. “It’s getting late. You always get here so late,” she added. “Now, offthe couch, you two, I can’t very well sleep on it before wiping up those cookiecrumbs.”

They stood, Erwin becoming more sheepish as he realized howmany more cookies he’d snuck while looking at the photos. There was only oneleft on the plate. “Mom, you don’t have to be on the couch,” Levi stated, “Wecan sleep in the living room.”

“Nonsense!” She waved them away, almost pushing them in thedirection of the tiny hall. “You’re guests and I won’t have anyone saying I don’tknow how to treat guests!”

With minimal grumbling they gave in, Erwin secretly relievedthat he wouldn’t have to try to fit himself onto the small couch for the night.

After showers, on clean sheets under warm blankets, Erwinpulled Levi close. It was a necessity on the bed barely large enough for two,but it felt like a luxury when Levi didn’t protest.

“How does it feel to be home?” Erwin whispered, nosing atthe damp hair behind Levi’s ear.

“Don’t be silly.” Came the reply.

Erwin hummed a question, pulling the blankets higher as Levi’sfeet wormed between his legs. Wrapped up in each other, the quiet dark of thecountryside outdoors fell over them like a curtain of calm. He breathed deep, savoringthe smell of shampoo and scrubbed-clean skin. The words Levi spoke echoed inhis marrow as they were muttered sleepily into the cocoon of warmth-

“This isn’t my home. You are.”

[tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors]

"Smothered" hits a lot different after "Gifts" and I'm In Pain

one day im gonna make a compilation of “2-3 fic Extra compilations and the order you should read them in for Maximum Emotional Impact, subsections Agony, Schmoop, and Rage”

[ficsforfangirls]

Which Tag is the Right One?

This is a post masquerading as a “master post” of the most popular and most common tags that you can use to maximize the exposure that your fanfiction will have to your potential audience. While most of us don’t write fanfiction for recognition, there’s a certain level of validation that comes from getting feedback and view counts. So I’ve broken the most popular tags into four major categories: Genre Tags, General Tags, Alternate Universe Tags, and Romance Tags. You can see those lists below. I also want to share a **PRO-TIP** with you. Most platforms where you would post and share your social media limit the number of searchable tags. It is usually the first 3-6 tags you list, and then everything else is kind of “extra.” In some ways, those PHRASES can be searched, but you want at least your first 3-6 phrases to be easily searchable for maximum exposure. This is a business tactic, too, of many businesspeople and social media influencers. It is called search engine optimization, or SEO. This will be good practice for you in general as you promote anything you do or care about in your life.

So, I recommended starting in the first category and move down the list. 

>If you are not writing an Alternate Universe or Romance fanfiction, my recommended count is 1 from the Genre Category and 2-4 from the General Tags. 

>For an Alternate Universe fanfiction story, adjust your numbers to be 1 from Genre, 2-3 from General Tags, and 1 from the Alternate Universe list. 

>If you’re writing a Romance piece, I recommend using 1 Genre, 1-2 General tags, and 2-3 Romance tags.

>If you are writing an Alternative Universe Romance, then I recommend 1 Genre tag, 1 General Tag, 1 Alternate Universe Tag, and 2 Romance tags.

Now, without further adieu - see the tags in each category below the line!

GENRE TAGS:

Realism

Magical Realism

Adventure

Action

Angst

Hurt & Comfort

Hijinks & Shenanigans

Humor

Romantic Comedy

Crime or Crime Scene

Friendship

Family

Sci-fi

Fantasy

Horror

Romance

Erotica

YA (Young Adult)

GENERAL TAGS:

Oneshot

Self-Insert or Mary Sue

Plot Twist

EWE (Epilogue What Epilogue)

Slow Build

Canon Divergent

Canon Compliant

Crack or Crack Fic

OOC (Out of Character)

OC (Original Character)

Crossover or X-Over

Happy Ending

Fix It or Fix It Fic

Death Fic

WIP (Work in Progress)

TW (Trigger Warning)

Sick Fic

Whump

Gender Swap or Gender Bend or Rule 63

Time Travel

Headcanon

Fanon

Flashbacks

Implied or Referenced

PWP (Plot What Plot)

Flashfic (100-500)

Drabble (100-1,000)

Ficlet (500-10,000)

Long Fic (10,000+)

Meta Fic

Pre-Canon

Post-Canon

Feels

Drama

Plotty

Explicit Language

ALTERNATE UNIVERSE (AU) TAGS:

Fantasy AU

Modern AU

Medieval AU

Mermaid AU

Arranged Marraige AU

Coffee Shop AU

Soulmate AU

Murder Mystery AU

Wrong Number AU

Secret Identity AU

Bookshop AU

Flower shop AU

Celebrity AU

YouTube AU

Hogwarts AU

Dragon AU

Horror AU

High School AU

College AU

Kids AU

Library AU

Roommate AU

Superhero AU

CSI AU

ROMANCE TAGS:

Fake Relationship or Pretend Relationship

Established Relationship

M-Preg or Male Pregnancy

PWP (Porn with/out Plot)

Break Up

Dom/Sub

Betrayal

Getting Together

Dirty Jokes

Moral Ambiguity

Age Difference

Homophobia

LGBTQ or LGBT

Domestic

Bonding

Smut

FWP (Fluff without Plot)

Porn or Pornography or Rule 36

Schmoop (PDA Fluff)

WAFF or Warm And Fuzzy Feelings (AKA Waffle)

UST (Unresolved Sexual Tension)

Pining

Mutual Pining

Meet Cute

Flangst (Fluff + Angst)

Frottage (Non-pentrative Sexual Activity)

Fluff or Fluffy

Kink

Slow Burn

Enemies to Lovers

Friends to Lovers

Enemies to Friends to Lovers

M/M (Male x Male)

F/M (Female x Male)

F/F (Female x Female)

F/M/M (Female x Male x Male)

F/F/M (Female x Female x Male

F/F/F (3 Females)

M/M/M (3 Males)

Threesome

Polyamory

Confession

Coming Out

Slash

Alpha/Beta

Alpha/Beta/Omega

Dubious Consent

First Kiss

Cuddle Fluff

Unrequited Love

Explicit Sexual Content

If there are any tags on this list that you don’t know or don’t understand, I use this amazing resource when I come across tags that I don’t know. It is really helpful information and definitely a good resource to keep bookmarked with this post. That post explains what everything means, and this post helps you narrow down was it popular and working for your absolute success! Win-win for everyone!

[yodepalma]

Commissions? Maybe?

I have no idea if anybody would even be interested in this, but I really need some money, so it’s worth a shot.

What I won't write: Smut (I write tasteful fade-to-blacks, okay), incest, bestiality, rape, pedophilia...yeah that's about it. I reserve the right to turn down anything else at my own discretion though.

What I specialize in: Fluff and schmoop, both shippy and gen! Also crossovers and alternate universes (mostly fantasy and soft scifi), crackfic taken seriously, and the occasional sickfic. Feel free to ask for anything else that doesn't break my rules.

Note: If you check out my work on ao3, you'll notice basically everything is slash. While that tends to be my preference and I generally stick to certain pairings, I will write het and femslash, and I'm perfectly willing to branch out. Ask about your crackpair! ;)

Fandoms I've well-versed in: Ronin Warriors/Yoroiden: Samurai Troopers Harry Potter (books) Good Omens Kingdom Hearts (nothing after KH2; I'm not comfortable with BBS yet) Fullmetal Alchemist (I default to '03, but can write both; there are pairings & characters I can't/won't write though) Final Fantasy VI Final Fantasy VIII Final Fantasy XV Less comfortable but still willing to write: Good Omens Chrono Trigger Lunar: Silver Star Story/Harmony Star Ocean 2 Gundam Wing You can ask about other fandoms, but I tend not to be up-to-date on current fandoms. :)

I'm also willing to write original pieces! I won't write your OCs, but if you provide me a prompt/genre, I'll dust off some of my older OCs that will otherwise never see the light of day and throw them into the fray. :)

Pricing: Fanfic: $1 per 100 words. You can request as little as a drabble if you want (100 words), with a maximum of 5,000 words. If you want higher word counts, you can ask, but I make no guarantees. Originals: $1.50 per 100 words. Minimum 500 words, maximum 5,000 words.

Payments accepted up front via Paypal. Please message me on my Tumblr with your requests.

By the way, I tend to write in Arial Narrow 12pt font, which is weird and tiny for many people. If that's going to be an issue, let me know and I'll switch it to something more appropriate for you.

Works will be exclusively for you unless you give me permission to post publicly.

I also accept donations, if you can!