#maybe they aren't fucking but Morph wishes they were

[sammysdewysensitiveeyes]

No seriously, I think the show is really going there, or at least implying it.

(spoilers)

I mean, there will never be Morph and Wolverine in an actual relationship beyond friendship, because Wolverine is the fanboy favorite, massively popular character, and they would never risk putting him in a m/m relationship. (Or interpreted as m/m, Morph being nonbinary but generally presenting in a male way.) We had a gay Wolverine in the comics, but he was an au version of the character in a book that wasn't widely read, and it was still controversial. And despite all the fan jokes and headcanons, there is no actual proof that Scott and Wolverine are fucking in the main 616 comics in whatever Krakoa "poly" relationship involving Jean may or may not be happening. Marvel is not going to risk upsetting fans with a bi Wolverine in a show that will be watched by far more people than read the comics.

But Morph having secret, unrequited feelings for Wolverine that go beyond friendship? Yeah, they could go there. Like I said in another post, Morph is a safe character to do this with, they were barely in the original cartoon, they have very little presence in the comics (outside of AU books like Exiles), they are far less popular than the big names. And the OG cartoon established that Wolverine is their special buddy. (Not to mention, TAS Morph has NO established sexuality, they don't express attraction to anyone in the whole series.)

So far, we've seen Morph shift into Jean and mock both her and Cyclops in an attempt to cheer up a despondent Wolverine (and doesn't that feel a little bit like a "Hey, look at MEEE!" moment?).

We've seen Morph go out of their way again to engage Logan in a mock fight. This happens during a montage when Jean is reading a letter from Storm, and scenes seem to correspond with Storm's comments about the importance of forming bonds with others. The Wolverine and Morph scene happens when Storm's letter is talking about how people will "make any sacrifice" to maintain those bonds, but what is being sacrificed here? I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that it's Morph ignoring and staying quiet about their feelings for Wolverine in order to maintain the friendship.

But then, there was the latest episode, holy shit. Everyone is hallucinating nightmares due to the influence of fake Jean/Madelyn Pryor. What does Morph hallucinate? They hallucinate a naked Wolverine in the shower - and the camera even does a slow pan up when Morph sees him, like the "sexy lady" gaze in movies. Morph jokes about helping Wolverine wash those "hard to reach areas," and actually starts to walk into the shower with him, holy shit. Then the hallucination shifts into nightmare mode, and the Wolverine hallucination responds with:

"Always with the jokes, Morph."

Then:

"As if I don't know. As if we all don't know."

Don't know WHAT, exactly? What exactly is the heterosexual explanation for this scene? Morph could have been hallucinating anything, the writers chose to put them in this very homoerotic situation with Wolverine. Oh, and at the same time, Gambit is seeing a hallucination of Rogue and Magneto together, in what seems like an obvious parallel.

"Wolverine" then changes into Sinister to show Morph's obvious greatest fear, but WHY start the scene like that? Why start with naked Wolverine and "As if I don't know. As if we all don't know."

They may not be fucking, but I will not be surprised if the show gives us "secretly pining for Logan" Morph.

[toruro]

hhu + you being jealous

tags/warnings: jealousy, sexual content (mostly non-explicit), oral (both m and f receiving), light angst (it's resolved)

w/c: 3.8k

seungcheol

he's just so hot and so charming that you can't even get mad at him when you see one of the girls at this party you're at come just a little too close, bat her eyelashes just a little too much, laugh just a little too hard. cheol may not notice anything wrong with it but you're a girl and you definitely do, sending death glares from across the room. cheol isn't looking your way right now—you know it's because he's talking to a group of people but one of the people happens to be her—and you're suddenly overwhelmed with a nasty feeling in your stomach.you aren't sure if you want to go up to him and kiss him smack on the lips in front of everyone or resort to ignoring him for the rest of the night (you know it's not technically his fault but you're in a bratty mood and the scene in front of you makes you want to burst into tears). jealousy coursing through your veins, you choose the latter. you don't look his way (although it is very hard with the way he looks so good tonight), you don't go up to him—frankly, you don't do anything. you're left alone for your jealousy to bubble up in it's own isolation, morphing into some kind of ugly sadness that's lingering in you when you come to notice that yes you haven't gone up to cheol in the past half hour but he also hasn't come up to you either.

eventually you'll end up on the sofa leaning into one of your girl friend's arm, finding solace in a person who you wished was cheol. that's when he'll come up to you (fucking finally!) with concerned eyes, "you wanna go?" he'll ask softly and for a moment you almost cave—almost. that's when you hear that girl's name (what's her fucking name...jiwoon?) calling for him, asking him when he'll be back. when cheol just calls back, "one minute," all traces of your forgiveness wither away. one second you were about to take his hand and ditch this party, but the next second you're sinking back into the arms of your friend, shaking your head. "go" you try to come off as cool but the venom is seeping through and cheol gives That Look. "baby—" you'd cross your arms over your shoulder, closing him off. "no," you say with a shrug, "go." he'd sigh, shoving his hands in his pocket, "i don't wanna stay if something's bothering you." you'd think this is your chance (about time!), "then we should've left an hour ago." he's giving you That Look again but you think you've suffered enough tonight—you won't relent. "what's that supposed to mean?" you feel slightly guilty when he says that because you know he's being genuine but you've been too upset for too long. "dunno..." your voice would trail off while you pretend to examine your nails, "maybe you should as jiwoon." he'd give you That Look times ten. "baby—" you shake your head, putting your hand up nonchalantly. "no, i don't care," you tell him, looking over at her. "you should go, she's calling you."

cheol would have his hands fisted at his sides, contemplating if he should be angry about you being so petty or upset with himself for neglecting your feelings. he'd try to get you to leave the party but it seems like you have your mind set. he'd try one more time: "no, we're going." you'd scoff at him—holy shit you scoffed at him! "no we are not," you'd shoot back, but this is when you start to feel your resolve crumble. the emotions you've been feeling for the past hour are catching up to you at record speed and having cheol stand in front of you and not sitting by your side is enough to have the familiar, stinging knot tie up in your throat. "okay fine," he'd reply, turning on his heel so fast that it'd have you spinning and reaching out to grab the hem of his jacket before he gets too far away. you won't meet his eye when he turns around, looking at the ground when you speak, "fine, let's go." you're barely audible but cheol would get the message, locking his fingers with yours to pull you up and out of this house. you won't say anything as he leads you outside and into the car, and cheol doesn't speak either as he climbs into the drivers seat. his expression would be unreadable, making the sinking feeling in your stomach plummet even further.

"i wasn't flirting with jiwoon," cheol says after a few minutes of silence, eyes still on the road. you don't say anything for a few seconds, arms crossed over your chest as you look out the window, tears threatening to spill. "well she was," you finally would shoot back, slumping further into your seat. your voice would come out wobbly and you can only pray that cheol doesn't noti—"don't cry, please," he murmurs, reaching a hand out to rest on your thigh. "we were supposed to have fun tonight." you'd think that if he's already caught you there's no point in hiding it, letting your tears fall onto your thighs with some landing on cheol. "seems like you were having the time of your fucking life," you murmur, not daring to look at him. "you know i wasn't," he says, and you reply almost immediately. "then why didn't you come to me?" you cry out, the silent tears gushing out now, not realizing that you've reached the parking lot of your guys' apartment complex. once he's parked, cheol would look over you with a frown, cupping your face with the hand that wasn't on your thigh. "baby, you were with your friends and i was with my friends and jiwoon just happened to be there, i swear i didn't even talk to her that much. if i had known you didn't like it then i wouldn't have done it." he'd wipe away your tears and honestly, him saying that would be enough to wash way your sadness too. "i know," you'd mumble, looking off into the distance. "then why're you so upset baby?" your cheeks would be on fire at the question, suddenly embarrassed by your brash actions. "she made me really mad, cheol," you would confess finally meeting his gaze, not missing the playful glint in his eyes as he plants a kiss on your forehead. "you have nothing to worry about baby, i love you so much, you know that." you unbuckle your seatbelt after that, moving to exit the car along with cheol, a small grin creeping its way onto your face. "maybe you'll have to just how much."

it's no question he basically fucked you into the mattress that night. considering your "party night" got cut early, you both had to make up for it somehow. usually cheol would be a bit of a mean dom, definitely into the idea of 'punishing' you for being bratty but after seeing and feeling your tears, he doesn't have the heart to do anything when this was pretty much his fault. definitely has you cumming at least three to four times, making sure that you understand just how much he loves you.

wonwoo

you wouldn’t know what exactly you’d had in mind for this dinner out with your and wonwoo’s friends, but it definitely wouldn’t be this. if anything, you’re friend(?) coming up to you with a smirk saying, “when did wonwoo get so hot?” would be the last thing you expect. you’d just furrow your eyebrows, shrugging off the comment as the familiar, nasty knot pools at the bottom of your stomach. trying your best to brush off both your feelings and jiwoon’s statement, which you try to justify as an ill-placed but not ill-intentioned comment, you scoot a little closer to wonwoo’s side in the restaurant booth while the ten of you get settled in. he’d wrap an arm around your shoulder instinctively, but if you’re being honest, it does little to quell the cold feeling that comes over you when you watch jiwoon glance over at your boyfriend definitely more than once or twice. you wouldn’t want to bring it up with wonwoo, at least not right now—it’s a nice night and he’s enjoying himself, and you’d be a fool to let a little jealousy try and take that away from him.

of course, a little jealousy turns into a lot and you grow increasingly quiet as the night progresses, eventually causing your boyfriend’s worried eyes to fall on your figure next to him. eyes boring into yours when you catch him staring, you quickly try to turn away before he speaks. “everything okay?” he asks quietly as the rest are eating and continuing the conversation. the grimace on your face is more than apparent—you’d be stupid to try and convince him that there’s nothing bothering you. still, you’re a bit…frustrated. jiwoon has been making off hand remarks the entire night—things like, “wow wonwoo, i didn’t know you were such a gentleman,” or “wow, you must be so lucky to have wonwoo”—and you’re slightly (very) annoyed that wonwoo hasn’t picked up on her not-so-subtle hints yet. maybe it’s the pettiness coming out—no, it definitely is. “nothing,” you’d say in response, giving him a nonchalant shrug which, despite your words, is intended to give him the message that ‘there’s something wrong but i’m going to be a brat and not tell you.’ message received, you’d think when you see the look on wonwoo’s harden slightly. “so are you going to tell me or not,” he retorts. you turn away from him, leaning forward to take a bite out of your meal. “dunno,” you’d murmur with a shrug. you can tell he’s tense next to you but you wouldn’t do anything, hoping it would give him the encouragement to figure it out on his own.

wonwoo would be pissed. he wouldn’t really know what’s got you in this sour but he knows that you only ever be bratty like this when it has something to do with him—any other case and you’d be clinging by his side and pretty much begging for his comfort and attention. he would try to retrace the events of the night, thinking of all the things he said and did to you trying to place where he went wrong. the whole situation only really clicks for him when he catches you glaring hard at jiwoon—well not really. it doesn't make perfect sense to him yet, but when he says something and catches jiwoon looking at him in some sort of way, that's when it fully clicks. wonwoo would be a bit...endeared actually. i feel like he'd love the idea that you love him enough to be so jealous and petty over a girl he couldn't give two flying fucks about, but he also knows that this isn't the time to joke around. you're obviously upset and trying to be stubborn and that is arguably one of the hardest things to deal with. you're pretty much silent for the rest of the night, hardly contributing the the conversation and wonwoo really wants to leave now knowing that you aren't having a good time, but he also knows that you wouldn't want to make a scene or anything by leaving early, so he just settles for keeping a hand on your thigh for the rest of the meal before he excuses the both of you and basically drags you by the wrist to take you home.

you'd still be silent on the way to the car, letting out a small huff as you'd cross your arms over your chest after putting on your seatbelt. after wonwoo starts the engine, he'd look over you with That Look. "baby," he'd say somewhat sternly. you'd look out the window, thinking of things to say. "i hate you," you'd say finally and you don't miss the way wonwoo grips the steering wheel so tight that his knuckles are bright white. "for looking so good," you'd add to clarify, sinking into your seat with embarrassment. whatever traces of anger that stemmed from your jealousy withered away, leaving you in a rather pouty and sulky state instead. wonwoo chuckles softly, "jealous much?" you'd frown, finally meeting his gaze so you could confide. "you know what jiwoon said to me?!" you whine. he raises a brow at you at the red light, encouraging you to go on. "she said 'when did wonwoo get so hot?' what the fuck! who says that? especially to his girlfriend?!" you start complaining, throwing your hands in the air out of frustration. "and she kept on looking at you, like who does she think she is? i swear to god if i ever fucking see her again i'll—" wonwoo laughs and puts his hand on your thigh, squeezing tightly to shut you up. "baby," he'll say sternly again. "you know you're the only one i love, right? i don't care about jiwoon." you pout. "okay? that won't stop her from caring about you!" wonwoo laughs again at your outrage, and although you're still a little bit upset, you can feel the irritation you once felt fading away, morphing into a more playful sort of feeling.

when you guys get home, wonwoo would waste no time throwing you onto the bed and eating you out until you're in tears and SUPER sensitive. his excuse would be something along the lines of how your brattiness distracted him from dinner, so you should give him a second meal agagaga something cheesy like that.

mingyu

i feel like mingyu would be the type to get jealous easily which means that he definitely knows the signs from the very start, from the way you're huffing with every word you say, your arms crossed over your shoulders, and shooting not-so-subtle glares. he'd honestly find it really...cute. you, on the other hand, would be fuming. you hate the way jiwoon is looking at your boyfriend even though you know she knows he's taken. you catch the way mingyu's looking at you and you would know that he sees your jealousy, but something inside of bubbles up in anger at the way he's...not really doing anything about it. okay, it isn't as if he's flirting back with jiwoon, and he's hardly looking at her, but you would just wish that he'd do something. you're too stubborn, and mingyu may know that you're jealous but he doesn't know that you are definitely going to drag this out. instead of clinging to his side like you usually do at parties, you huff at the sight of mingyu talking with some people (one who just so happens to be jiwoon) and turn on your heel to retreat to a different room when he's not looking.

you aren't really sure what to expect after that—you would be half hoping to just be left alone but deep down you know that you want mingyu to chase after you. to leave all those people and leave jiwoon behind. he doesn't, and you aren't sure if it's because he doesn't care (you know this isn't true, but you can't help but see this as your first option when you're so emotional) or because he's just trying to press your buttons but whatever it is it has you a mess. you lock yourself in some random bathroom after a few moments of waiting for mingyu to follow, leaning against the closed door as you try to focus on anything but the current situation. mingyu would be in the other room slightly confused. he'd see you for one moment, focus on his conversation, and then look back to find you not there. he'd know you're jealous right now but he would just think you went to go grab a snack or something for a moment, so when you don't return within a few minutes he'd have to excuse himself, worrying that maybe you were more upset than he anticipated. he'd ask around for where you were when he couldn't find you in the main rooms, one of your friends begrudgingly letting him know that you told her you were going to one of the bathrooms and hadn't been back since. after that, it takes him hardly ten seconds to find the nearest bathroom, knocking on the door asking you to let him in. mingyu won't know what he expected but it certainly wasn't you opening the door almost immediately, looking awfully tired as there was some stupid game opened up on your phone.

"what are you doing?" he'd ask, closing the door behind him as you wouldn't meet his gaze. you shrugged, bringing your phone back up to your face to finish the game, sinking to the ground. "baby, talk to me," he'd say as he crouched down to be on your level, snatching the phone out of your hands. "hey!" you'd complain, trying to reach for it fruitlessly while mingyu—fucking giant—dangled it above your head. there's a smirk toying on his lips, and you're reminded of the whole situation—the one you'd been desperately trying to avoid—all over again, this time with tears welling up in your eyes. "if you're only going to actually talk to me just to annoy me then you might as well go back to jiwoon," you'd spit out, standing up so you could leave the bathroom that had provided you more solace than your boyfriend in the past half hour. mingyu frowns deeply after that, the smirk vanishing off his face immediately as he grabbed your wrist, pulling away from the door. "i'm sorry, i didn't realize you were actually upset about," he'd murmur, pulling you into his arms, feeling more guilty than anything. "why wouldn't i be upset?" you'd shoot back, your voice wobbly, "she was basically shooting heart eyes at you and you just let her!" now mingyu would start to feel like an even bigger idiot. "i'm sorry, you're right i should have stopped her. i just thought it was cute that you were getting jealous, i didn't mean to actually make you sad," he'd ramble. "you know i love you so much—only you."

you'd be pouting right now, tears not really pouring anymore but still staining your cheek as mingyu would bring up a hand to brush them off. "i'm really sorry baby—so sorry. i didn't mean to make you cry; never wanted that." you'd let out a small huff but lean into mingyu's touch, much to his relief. after you'd murmur your quiet, "i love you," he'd be kissing you so passionately you would think you couldn't breathe. "let me," he'd gasp between kisses as he was feeling up your body and wrapping his strong arms around your thighs to lift you onto the bathroom counter, "show you how much i love you." how could you say no? he eats you out and fingers you hard in the bathroom, and you would be lying if you said you didn't moan his name extra loud when you both heard jiwoon knocking on the door, asking if mingyu was in there. safe to say she didn't bother you or mingyu once for the rest of the night—not that she'd have the chance anyways, since mingyu basically pulled you to the car after making you cum on his fingers so he could fuck you another few times at home.

vernon

vernon is interesting. it would be hard for you to get mad at him out of jealousy simply because he's very perceptive and if there's anything he hates it would be seeing you upset over something that's within his control. if he's ever in the scenario where he even thinks someone is flirting with him, or trying to make moves, he'd tell you RIGHT AWAY! like either text you or let you know personally if you are in the room with him. some things are out of his control, of course, like tonight. you were hesitant to go out with this group of friends since there would be a lot of new people that both you and vernon didn't really know. he seemed eager though, excited to try something new, so you didn't protest, going happily along with him to this day at the carnival. but currently, you were anything but happy. there's definitely a girl who's got her eyes set on vernon and no matter how much you hold his hand, how much you cling to his side, how much you try to show her that he is yours, jiwoon just doesn't fucking seem to get the message.

vernon would pick up on your sour mood right away—like i said, he's super perceptive and WILL make sure that he's doing everything he can to diffuse the situation. he'd direct the both of you away from her, although you can't help but notice how that doesn't really stop her sparring glances. "baby," he'd finally murmur to you, "let's just ignore her," he'd suggest, pulling you closer to his side (honestly, there's no way you can be mad at him in this situation). "you're right," you'd mumble in response, looking over his shoulder to catch jiwoon staring at vernon AGAIN! "fucking hell does she think i'm blind or something? i swear to god if she tries to look at you one more time i might just sock her in the face right here and now!" you whisper-yell. vernon chuckles at your heated response, pressing a kiss to your lips. "maybe you should. that would be funny," he admits. "you're cute when you're mad," he'd add too, and you wouldn't be sure if your face's burning from being jealous or from vernon's compliment. whatever it is, it has you looking away bashfully, causing vernon to laugh some more.

honestly, you won't really be mad at him BUT you would be pouty and sulky the entire day, much to vernon's amusement. when you guys finally get home, you don't even let him get to the living room before you're smashing your lips on his with a year's worth of pent up frustration. honestly, you feel bad for being a bit grumpy all day despite vernon trying to make you feel not jealous so you figure you can repay him with some really good head and let me tell you vernon LOVES head. i said it once and i'll say it again but oral is like his ambrosia and the entire time he'll be praising you so good it nearly brings you to your own release. that and you know that jiwoon would never even be able to imagine making vernon feel as good as you are right now hehe.

[missvelvetsstuff]

Just a Number

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Reader meets Bucky at a party and the attraction is more than either one of them wants to resist.

Reader is 47 and has adult kids who aren't sure about her new beau.

Chapter 8

Notes: it feels like it's been forever but I'm still alive. The holidays were rough, we were all sick and broke but my family is together and that's what's important. The husband and oldest are both working full time now and it's gonna take some time but life is heading back towards our normal level of broke.

My muse is very slowly waking up and I'm hoping to find the inspiration to get back to work on my other wip's and even have an idea or two for new stories.

I just realized that I've gone over 1000 followers and can only offer my shock and gratitude to y'all.

Hope this is worth the wait.

Warnings: swearing, angst

Y/N was too busy for the next few days to do more than work and sleep. Contract disputes arose in Malaysia which meant 3 nights away from home. It wasn't so bad, Pepper always had the best of everything and wasn't stingy.

She struggled to sleep with the time changes and late night meetings, only wishing she could go home to her own bed and sleep for at least a day straight.

That might not help her dreams. They started sweet before turning sexy and she never had the chance to get any release when they went bad. In one dream she let Bucky tie her up and he quickly went from teasing to torturing. If she was lucky she woke up screaming but sometimes she couldn't wake herself up and was trapped by the Winter Soldier, who then morphed into John, until something woke her up.

The first night home from Malaysia she woke up crying and went down to the kitchen for some tea, only to find Dawn waiting with her mug and the tea kettle whistling.

Dawn spoke softly.

"Come have a cuppa and talk to me Sissy. I feel like I haven't seen you in ages"

Y/N scoffed softly "Don't be so melodramatic I've only been gone for a few days."

Dawn shrugged "It's not the same here when you're gone. Maybe I'll get a dog."

Y/N smirked "Fine, as long as it's not some yappy purse dog. Pits and Shepherds are good."

Dawn's smile grew "You said fine, I'm getting a puppy next Saturday. You want to come to the shelter with me?"

Y/N smiled and nodded "I'm in."

Dawn poured hot water in their mugs "Now that's been settled. What's going on? I heard crying."

Y/N shook her head "Nothing. I'm just severely jet-lagged and can't sleep. My schedule is all fucked up. I'll be alright, just need some sleep. Luckily, Pepper gave me tomorrow off."

Dawn looked at her pointedly "None of that equals crying so tell me."

Y/N shrugged "Weird dreams involving James and John, I don't know how to sort them out. I miss James, was looking forward to seeing him and now I don't know when that will be. I don't miss Johnny but do hope he's alright."

Dawn nodded "Some sleep will help. And a puppy. Definitely need a puppy."

Y/N chuckled "So we can fight over who he sleeps with?"

Dawn smirked "So we'll get two puppies."

Y/N rolled her eyes at her sister and drank her tea before Dawn gave her a hug and she went back to her room to try and get some sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On the other side of the world things weren't going much better. John hadn't stopped complaining since he saw Bucky that first day. Bucky had been getting some amusement over Johns whining but was ready to put him down after the three of them got into it with some small time organized criminals who accused them of dealing on their turf.

Or that's what they thought until Sam realized one of them was enhanced.

Instead of focusing on taking the men down, John spent most of that fight trying to get the shield from Sam who ended up hurt pretty badly over it.

Bucky had enough and was giving John a piece of his mind when John tried to sucker punch him.

Unfortunately for John, he was still adjusting to his enhancement from the serum, while Bucky had been fighting with the serum for decades and caught John's fist with his vibranium hand.

He glared at John but couldn't help smirking when John realized he was caught.

Bucky squeezed John's hand "You gonna stop acting like a bitch or do I have to break your fucking hand?"

John whined "No, you can't you'll lose your pardon. I'll say you started it."

Buckys grin grew as John fell to his knees "You're on thin ice with the govt already, sure you want to take that chance?"

John cried out "Fine! Fine. Shit!!" and clutched his right hand to his chest when Bucky released it.

Bucky offered a hand up which John slapped away, making Bucky laugh out loud before he went to check on Sam. They took a day to let Sam rest and recover.

By the end of the week looking for the power broker, nerves were frayed. Sam was ready to let Bucky have at John and just turn his head.

Friday night found the three men and Sharon drinking mini bar shots in a hotel suite in Croatia.

Sharon was all over Bucky even after he repeatedly and politely asked her to stop.

Sam was practically passed out on one of the chairs, mumbling out comments at the game of Cards Against Humanity they had been playing for 4 hours.

John was a little better off than Sam but likely only because of the serum.

Sharon had been going in and out for at least an hour but her occasional snores made John and Bucky giggle.

Bucky downed 3 tequila shots in quick succession, wishing for even a slight buzz for his efforts, before elbowing John in the ribs.

It didn't occur to him that he was inebriated and spoke in a slurring stage whisper "Hey" he tapped John's shoulder "Hey!" John mumbled then snored so Bucky slapped him across the face, 'gently' with his flesh hand "JOHNNY!!"

John sat up abruptly "What? Goddammit Olivia why are you waking me up. Stupid bitch."

He looked around for a moment before realizing where he was when he saw Bucky staring at him. John scoffed "What the buck do you want Fucky? Keep bugging me and I'll make sure you never get near my sister again."

John looked around some more until he saw Sharon "Sharon!!" When she groaned and rolled over he mumbled again. "Fucking cunt better wake up so we can....."

Bucky listened to his mumbling, trying to figure out what John was doing with Sharon. He couldn't understand why he felt drunk all of a sudden but blacked out before he could figure it out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The rest of the week flew by and on Sunday Y/N was preparing tacos for dinner with her kids.

Jessie arrived early and helped while discussing work and a guy she met on her lunch break.

Michael showed up late and Y/N could smell the alcohol on his breath. She wasn't pleased with that but knew it would make it easier to get his secrets out of him.

Y/N heard her phone dinging in her bedroom and left Jessie to watch the meat.

When she looked at the text there was no number listed and a bunch of dark pics with a nude couple, obviously mid coitus. She gasped when she saw the glint of gold on Bucky's left arm and her stomach fell when she saw the woman on top of him had long blonde hair that was definitely not hers. Her eyes filled with tears and she quickly shuffled to the bathroom to splash some water on her face and put her phone away to be dealt with later.

Jessie scoffed at her brother "What is wrong with you Mikey?"

Michael smirked at her "Just celebrating, my dear sister. Getting rid of some dead weight." He laughed at his comments and Jessie growled at her brother.

She grabbed his collar "You better not be screwing with mom or Sargent Barnes." She stood on her tiptoes and looked him in the eyes "I will fuck you up if you hurt her, Mikey. I'm not playing."

Michael scoffed "A little heartbreak today will spare her from much worse later on. Now can we eat yet?"

Y/N overheard Michael but couldn't understand half of his words. She shook her head, knowing he was up to something because he almost never drank, and walked up to her kids.

"Michael, can you set the table please. Auntie is out so it's just the three of us."

Michael scoffed "She's gonna end up with AIDS or something, as much as she whores around."

Y/N bristled and tapped him upside his head "MICHAEL DAVID! What the Hell is wrong with you? You will not speak of your aunt like that."

He rolled his eyes "You talk about uncle Johnny like that all the time. What's the difference?"

She sighed "Jessie, can you make some coffee for your brother?" Then turned on her son "The difference is that Dawn helped raise you and has always been there for all of us while Johnny disrespected me and your father every chance he got. Or did you drink so much you forgot about that? I don't know what's going on but you better think real hard about the next thing you say to me."

Michael looked in her eyes and spat "If you cared so much about dad then why are you disrespecting him by fucking a war criminal?"

His head was turned before he realized she had slapped him. His hand flew up to his cheek and he looked at her in shock.

"You know I loved your father and more importantly he knew but he has been gone for over 5 years. Do you expect me to live alone for the rest of my life? I'm almost 50, not almost dead and I deserve to be loved, dammit."

She paused to take a sip of her wine "And James is a good man who was forced into fucked up circumstances. The government has pardoned him and you don't need to make his life any more difficult than it already is." She shook her head "I don't know how you ended up such a selfish and judgemental prick but your father would be ashamed. Now help your sister bring the food in."

Michael just stared at his mother before walking away muttering "That assholes life will be real simple when he's locked up on the Raft."

He pulled his phone out and didn't realize Jessie was listening until he ran into her "What have you done, Michael? I can't believe you would sabotage Moms happiness."

He scoffed "She'll get over it. Be easy for a slut like her to find another guy."

Jessie punched him in the stomach and took his phone away when he doubled over. Her eyes grew wide when she saw the messages from their uncle and she shoved Michael to the floor before hurrying to the dining room

"MOM!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Early morning that same day, Bucky woke up feeling hungover, in a strange bed. It took a few minutes for him to sit up and remember where he was. He held his head and groaned, jumping when he heard a moan right next to him. He looked over and practically fell out of bed trying to get away from his bed mate. When he hit the floor he realized that he was naked. Grabbing the blanket he stood up awkwardly trying to cover his nudity. As he pulled on it he saw it sliding off of the person in his bed, who he definitely didn't want to uncover.

She groaned "Jimmy, baby what's wrong?"

Bucky shook his head "Sharon? What the fuck are you doing in here? I told you to leave me alone."

Sharon giggled "Yeah you started that way but as the night went on you got much friendlier. Come back and I'll show you." She invited as she uncovered herself.

Bucky closed his eyes and shook his head "Nononono, Sharon you need to go. I don't want this, I don't want you. This didn't happen."

Sharon pouted "It definitely happened. Wanna see the pictures?"

"What? Pictures? What did you do to me Sharon? I remember drinking, playing some crazy card game and waking up just now." Bucky felt his heart speeding up and felt light headed "No, this didn't happen. You and John did something to me. You drugged me."

Sharon smiled wickedly "Aawww, how could little ol me do anything to a big bad super soldier? I think you wanted me and took what you wanted. Nothing wrong with that." She shrugged. "I definitely enjoyed it and the evidence says you did too."

Bucky could feel a panic attack coming on and felt his knees buckle before he dropped to the floor, his head fell into his hands "No. This can't be real. Please God don't let this be real."

Chapter 9

@supraveng @cjand10 @440mxs-wife @kandis-mom @dtba-grey81 @calwitch @ozwriterchick

[the-chattering-tower]

Hi I'm Karak and I care way too much about overthinking Sornieth beasts sometimes

Also Deeprealm Hunters/Spiney Whales are important in the lore of one of my subclans (Whalesrest Town, which is a stop along yearly ocean migration routes, and these cetaceans are commonly shepherds and guards of many other, less physically imposing species during this demanding journey) and I fuckim love orcas. I'm vibing

So! Thoughts

Deeprealm Hunters and Spiney Whales are the same species. The two different names exist much like "orca" and "killer whale" do in English (if you wanna pile on another one that isn't the latin name, my mother tongue for example calls them both "killer whales" and "sword winged dolphins" which is metal as fuck). The different names stem from the two wildly different morphs initially being interpeted as separate species. The distribution of the two morphs isn't a the same, but there is significant overlap

(Whalesrest Town sees both during the migrations, though Deeprealm Hunters slightly more commonly)

You don't need to avoid them, just don't be rude. Yes, they could kick your ass. No, you aren't obligated to give them a reason to

In terms of intelligence and longevity, they're very much on par with dragons. Magic isn't as much of an essential part of their lives though, with calves slowly mastering it on their way to adulthood and not all of them electing to use it in their day to day lives

Still, a lot of older individuals, especially matriarchs, are known to be quite knowledgeble magic users. Some are even capable of shifting into forms that allow them to live on land both short- and long-term

I Wish We Had Any Timeline/Timescale Reference for lore at all for me to figure out reasonably why they've only been popping up more numerously in the past century or so

Current theory: they were always around, just uncommonly sighted at best and not caring to interact with dragons much (the true aquatic dragons, the undertides, had been gone from the collective dragon conscious for generations by then. The Deeprealm however did not forget. Nor did they stop visiting). With BotE shaking shit up (including Tidelord firing himself), they decided to give this whole Talking To Dragons thing another go, bc hey, everything is going to shit a bit, would you like to maybe work together to prevent collapse of oceanic ecosystems due to Whatever The Fuck Just Happened And Filled Everything With An Extra Dose Of Magic Nonsense bc It's Turning The Frogs Gay Doing Weird Shit To The Fish

[strscrossed]

https://www.tumblr.com/strscrossed/735080711208452096/alright-any-ficlet-requests-today-in-the-mood

Today is my birthday so maybe a drabble of a bday surprise for any AU :D

But since It's my birthday I would have to request non angsty 😇

omg!!! happy birthday!!! and yes of course! not sure if this is related to the ask i got, but one for mean dom hobo eren coming right up! hope pregnancy is okay with you!

The second line was a little faded but there was no doubt. Two lines meant that she was pregnant. The other five tests all said the same.

Her hand covered her mouth as she stared in disbelief. She'd have to go to the doctors to confirm but there was no doubt. She was pregnant. She was having a baby with Eren. They were going to be parents.

He had to go into the office today to get a few things done but promised he would be home in time for lunch.

In the meantime, she wandered around the giant penthouse, dazed. The past few months have felt like a dream. A long, beautiful, somewhat funny dream. A few short months ago, she was sure that this whole thing was just physical but when Eren dropped to one knee with a ring, she'd never been happier to be wrong about something.

Mikasa liked to keep things simple and meals and while Eren never complained, she thought that this news was too special.

Her nerves were all over the place as she lovingly prepared lunch for the two of them and true to his word, Eren waltzes into the penthouse at half-past noon.

All the anxiety leaves her body as his strong arms envelop her and he kisses her cheek.

"Smells amazing," he mumbled into her skin and she smiled.

"Go sit down. I'm almost done..."

Eren was a picky eater, except for when it came to her cooking, then he'd eat pretty much anything. But roasted duck on a bed of mashed potatoes? She saw the stars in his eyes as she served him.

"It's not our anniversary."

Good, he was catching on.

"And it's not either of our birthdays."

"Nope, but I do have something to share. But I want you to finish."

She'd never seen Eren mow down his meal so fast. But then again, she knew when he was anticipating something, it always came in the form of eating too fast, pacing, or fucking her into next week.

And thank god, she kept the old gift boxes because she found one that was just the perfect size to hide the test.

When he was done, she placed the box down in front of him. He stared down at it.

"What's going on?"

She stifled her laughter, "Just open it."

They'd never talked about children. Although, he didn't seem opposed to the idea. She brought the idea up after the engagement and he'd worked her so well she couldn't walk the next day. Was that the night when this happened?

He opened the box and pulled out the test. At first, he was confused but when he stared at it for a few seconds, the expression on his face morphed.

It was an agonizing few seconds as she watched the pure, unadulterated joy dawn on his face.

"No, you aren't?" he whispered.

She nodded, "I am. I still have to go to the doctor but-!"

She was cut off by him tugging her forcefully into his arms and smothering her with his lips. The best kisses. The warmest kisses.

The kiss went on forever, at least she wished it did, so she mourned the loss of him when he pulled away.

"Really?" he whispered.

She nodded, "Yes, really..."

He buried his face into the nape of her neck, "Mine. All mine."

She held onto him. Several minutes went by like this. He left a trail of kisses down her neck and she sighed contentedly as she played with his hair.

She gasped when he picked her up.

"Eren?"

"City Hall. We're getting married. Today. Right now."

Her eyes widened, "But what about the huge ceremony you wanted...?"

"We'll still have it. But I need you as my wife. Right now. I can't wait anymore."

She couldn't argue with that. She just let him carry her off, her laughter could be heard throughout the building.

[tunashei]

First Impressions of Animorphs!

I'm listening to the Animorphs series while I work, through Animorphs Aloud - a fan made reading of the series. Here are my first impressions/random thoughts about them! Spoilers below if you haven't read them.

Book 12.5: The Andalite Chronicles (Part 2)

Oh no...the second they mentioned that Alloran and Arbron were last seen as Taxxons but it'd been over the two hour morph limit...one of them is gonna be stuck as a Taxxon, aren't they?

Sensible plan Elfangor, good choices

Arbron definitely ate that guy. Also this voice acting is very good, Arbron sounds gloomy and a little hysterical

Man I wish human larval forms could be set to work cleaning and doing menial chores, instead of just lying there and screaming. And then they'd cocoon and transform into fully functional adults instead of going through the awkward teenager stage

Ah fuck...totally called it. Arbron is a Taxxon forever now. That SUCKS man, I quite liked him. At least Tobias is stuck as something pretty cool, being a Taxxon seems like hell

As someone who is completely incapable of estimating speeds, three thousand miles per hour sounds totally believable

Arbron is so cool. Under the most intense pressure, life irrevocably changed for the worse, in a unfamiliar body and he STILL nails the shot. Three times

Oh yeah they could totally use the Time Matrix to fix Arbron

Elfangor please do not cut off your friends limbs he can no longer get those back by demorphing (what is it with Andalites and severing limbs??)

Hadn't considered before that if Andalites eat with their feet they must also taste with their feet. It's a good thing Ax has never been in andalite form walking around a typical human city...though he did eat cigarettes once so maybe he'd like it

Do andalite eyestalks have eyelids?

Elfangor you have the most powerful weapon in the universe on a hostile planet, your commander is missing, your friend is missing presumed dead, your alien crush is kidnapped and in peril, and any moment the Yeerks could find your crashed ship. Why are you reading a picture book

Oh my god is he going to drive the car

HELL FUCKIN YEAH ANDALITE DRIVING A MUSTANG

Oh ok Arbron can regrow limbs. Convenient. I'm glad he's found a purpose too, having an Andalite in control of a bunch of Taxxons could be pretty powerful

Alloran is back! I didn't think he'd vanish completely but him appearing as a Hork-Bajir genuinely surprised me

Woooow...I mean kind to give him the warrior title, Arbron totally deserves it, but *casualty of war?* That's harsh. I wonder how often this happens, Andalites getting trapped in morph while fighting in the war and then being discarded because accommodating them would be inconvenient. Or because having them be visible in society might make their military look bad.

Alloran what is the matter with you the MOST POWERFUL WEAPON IN THE UNIVERSE is just lying unattended in some desert and you're hung up on these insignificant Yeerks whose deaths would barely make a dent in the war. You have issues man

Bye bye visser three/sub visser seven I'm sure that was definitely you that fell out of the ship you're not currently in Chapmans head

War crimes! Woooooo!

Well, at least he realised before he got ambushed? And got the upper hand with some good shooting. Too bad you left Alloran to be infested. I was hoping we'd get to find out how Visser Three got his Andalite so pleased we got to see that

Ahaha this is devious I love it. Make him run. Make him DANCE. Those Hork-Bajir must have shit themselves when they realised they were shooting at their own visser

'You up for a little genocide, Elfangor?' Top 10 Animorphs Quotes

These living asteroids are weird, struggling to visualise them. Set em on the Yeerks

FUCKIN CHAPMAN. Should have put him in a cupboard or something. Deserved that nut shot

Dramatic end to this part! Intense action

[chaoticvictorianspirit]

Actually, I like codependency in fiction. Let people love each other exactly in the way they long for and need. Just because they are capable of functioning seperately doesn't mean they have to when all they want to do is spend their days together and share the tiny blip of existence they have left with one another. And I'm sorry but I'm tired of screenwriters pretending that learning to be miserable on your own is somehow a superior story arch as well as a moral virtue somehow. Maybe you want realism in your fiction but I for one want my comfort characters to morph into a singular entity. I want to treat them the way I did gummy bears as a child and just leave them out in the sun until they melt together into one solid block of sweetness. Reality is already depressing enough. Friendships end. Love fades. Life gets in the way and seperates people who aren't ready for their journey together to be over yet. Loved ones leave us all the time and sometimes there's no good explanation and it's unfair and painful and too often there's nothing you can do about it. And sometimes the one person you wish you could talk about it with the most is the one that's leaving and it fucking sucks. [And I get that this is precisely why we need these themes in fiction to confront these feeling and cope with them in a setting removed from reality but that's not what this post is about damn it.] I just wish this weren't the only angle we got. I wish we also got the "easy" happy endings, the unrealistic friendships, the kind of closeness that isn't portrayed as weighing you down but rather lifting you up. I wish fairytales weren't only for children and I wish adults didn't take such pride in forgetting they were children once, too. Can't we at least have the nice things in our little made up worlds?

TL;DR: Girls should get to have their little escapist delusions. As a treat.

[choysum]

you know you’ve been here before. you know you’d do it again.

people do this all the time. we like to hear each other’s thoughts. tell me what you believe in, is it what I believe in? are we the same? let’s sit here with a stick and draw out for each other all the lines that make up how your being is separate from mine, how your living is not my own. tell me what to love. let me disagree. I bite gently, most of the time.

I don’t know how people do this. it’s all departing trains, right? forever on and off and left at the station, balancing on in-between platforms and wondering how long you’ll have to hold this place.

come, build with me. let’s sketch out a room for you and I to sit in. (I know, I know, a room cannot hold all this, not a girl not a voice not a void not a god, not a single letter. the stroke of your pen for a comma and the pillars would come crumbling- but let’s build it anyway.) we should have a green couch. if not a carpeted floor, then at least a rug, let me have someplace soft to lay. we’ll hang that glass thing by the window, I can’t tell you what it is but the things it does to the light are the things you do to language translated into color. see yourself, catching on my sleeve? what else do you bring for our space?

they are building up in the ceiling. I can hear them muttering among themselves when it is very late at night, repeating and asking and telling. every audio note you do not send crowds over my head, and it’s like a birthday party where someone tugs a string and they all come cascading down at once. then I wake up in the lack of the cacophony and I read your letter and you are saying rather than rather than and I bite back rather than. it is a shame, that I have so often been such a gentle thing where I have wished to be a ferocious one. I love like an alley cat, demanding and skeletal, but I can wear the coat well of domesticity. I’ll be the thing that is held if I can also be the thing that is kept.

we could do it, couldn’t we, find a place for the voice notes. sit in the dusk at the sleepover that never began and listen. if I knew morse code I would tap it all out to you, you would feel my fingers at your wrist running antithetical to your pulse just to deliver a sentence.

(- in our neighbor timeline, we met over lex, of all things. it was small and ordinary, how many stories are there of people meeting over dating apps? and we just kept going out, I guess, and getting closer, and it was all so perfectly regular, we could have been anyone. what a relief that was.

people do this all the time.)

i think i've loved you before back when we were dinosaurs i want to stay in love in this life and the next one i think we've already met somewhere on another planet i loved you before !!!!

if my beliefs are not so different to yours im sure i could morph them almost efortlessly to whatever you'd prefer. would i really? maybe. perhaps that's not the best. i swear i'm staunch with my morals except for when i need someone to want me back. the life lines of how you and a pet differ; you and a childhood neighbor; you and your first best friend. i'm sorry, you're right, we don't have to think about that now.

departing trains and trains are angels aren't they? how do we live through so many varied goodbyes, i can't keep doing this, i can't continue with this (keeps going on and on and on, things fall apart and the centre cannot hold but it does, it DOES, because there is no other option). this is all so fucking pretentious but i will keep going, monkey at a typewriter 2023: an earnest odyssey. i will never be a poet but i will try say enough to make my friends feel loved (if i wake up at 6.59 and tell you i love you i will have done enough with my day and killed noone in the process)

green couches and fractals of kaleidoscopic language dancing up and along the walls and i promise there is space for an alley cat here, too. i could want you however you want to be, this unconsciously melding into the rest of our lives

i actually do have lex! just reinstalled it after a few months, completely just because of this i wonder what settings i'd need to change for you to find me. what a relief that would be

[jjtheclown555]

As my page shows, I've fallen in love with Ran Haitani so heres a little thing i felt like writing!

Ecstasy

tw. drug addiction, mdma, ran isn't happy with reader (argument ahead), reader is way too high for this shit

content. reader has been taking molly in secret while claiming to their friends and boyfriend that they're clean

pairings. ran haitani x gn!reader word count. 1.5k words

You stare at the ceiling of Ran's home, the lights morphing as you feel the drugs kicking in.

Around 45 minutes ago you put the clear crystals into your rolling paper and parachuted it.

You slip out of your shared bed, looking at the time. 9:47 pm. Ran shouldn't be home for a few hours, your high shouldn't be too extreme by then.

You feel a pang of guilt.

But you couldn't handle sobriety.

The feeling of pure joy you felt on Ecstasy, you missed it too much.

How long has it been? About a month since you started lying. Buying and taking your favourite 'cure' whenever he left the house for his meetings and missions with Bonten.

You always told yourself as the hallucinations and utter bliss sunk in, that it's not his choice.

He's in a gang, he puts himself at risk every day. His associates do and sell drugs, why can't you? Ran had made you promise to quit. He went through withdrawal with you. Stayed by your side the whole time.

You sigh, drifting the thought of your lies away.

You don't feel like spending your high thinking of how upset he'd be.

You head over to the bathroom, looking at yourself in the mirror. You feel beautiful, all insecurities having washed away.

You pose for yourself, questioning how this is the person you wake up every morning wishing you weren't.

You look a little closer at your face. Looking into your eyes, mouth gaping at the dilation of your pupils.

"My pupils are massive..." you mutter to yourself, voice barely a whisper.

You check the time again, 10:02. Sometimes you forget how much molly fucks with your perception of time.

It feels like only 5 minutes have passed.

You sway back to your bed, falling onto it and turning onto your back.

You grip the necklace around your neck. Ran had given it to you on White Day. It was a large pink heart with 'baby' on it in cursive.

He probably wouldn't like what you use it for but you have nothing else.

You put the metal in between your chattering teeth, sitting up and deciding what to do.

Before you were forced to get clean, you'd be sending slurred audio messages to Ran, your friends, and the Bonten members.

No matter how annoyed some of them act, you were always sure they appreciated your intoxicated kindness.

Maybe you could watch TV. You don't have anything else to do.

You drop the necklace from your mouth, forgetting what you'd been thinking about and focusing on the distorted flooring.

That is until the door snaps open.

Ran is home.

You shift into bed, hiding under the covers as you hear him call out for you.

You close your eyes, attempting to focus on the bliss and ignore your boyfriend entering the bedroom.

"Asleep already? I was happy to be home early to spend more time with you." He brushes your hair behind your ear. Sitting in bed next to you.

He looks at you, you can feel his stare through your skin.

A heavy sigh comes from him as strokes your hair, running his fingers through it. "I know you aren't asleep." He says and your eyes flutter open, shying away so he doesn't see how large your pupils have gotten. "And you can look, I know you're using again."

You stare at him. It doesn't sink in. You just latch onto him, having missed him.

He's angry with you but you love him too much to care at the moment.

"Well, now I don't have to hide it! I can tell you all my feelings like I used to!"

He nudges you off, "That's not the point, Y/N!"

You tilt your head in confusion. You don't know why he's angry. You love him, why does that upset him?

"The point is that you promised to quit! You promised that you'd stay sober!"

Not wanting an argument to ruin your roll, you shift, stepping out of bed and leaving your shared room. However, he follows, much to your irritation.

He calls out to you but you ignore his frustrations. Once again stepping into the bathroom, this time you'll be staying for at least 4 hours. That or until he goes to sleep.

You listen to his lectures and questions. Varying from how if you keep this up you'll overdose or asking you where you've hidden your stash.

It takes about 15 minutes of listening, wanting to go out, apologize, and remind him of how much you love him. But it wouldn't be that easy, and he'd make you get clean again. So you settle for turning on the shower and stepping in.

The water feels so nice on your skin, it’s even nicer that it drowns out Ran's voice.

Everything is better on molly. Everything. Whether it be showers, sex, public events; everything feels better on your favourite amphetamine.

You fill your hair with shampoo and condition. Massaging it into your scalp.

You let the water flow over your hair as you wash the hair products out.

Next up is body wash, you cover your body in it, thinking of how Ran would do the same when you shower together.

You don't take long, turning off the water and squeezing your hair to get the water out.

You step on the cold bathroom floor, grabbing a towel to dry yourself off.

Ran's gone.

He probably got sick of you ignoring him and felt it'd be easier once you're more willing to talk. Once you dry off, you walk out of the bathroom, towel covering your body.

You walk through the living room and back into the bedroom, Ran nowhere to be seen.

"Maybe he left," you think as you put on your pyjamas. He probably wants to cool off and wait for your high to end before he starts talking to you.

You enjoy the high, sending him an audio message. He knows now, so you might as well send one like old times.

"Ran...I love you so much. I'm so glad I met you and I'm so sorry that I broke your trust. I just couldn't handle being sober and I love you so much, I don't wanna disappoint you...I'm sorry Ran...I love you so much..."

Your voice is slurred as always when you’re at the peak of your high.

After the message is sent, you put your phone away.

You ride out your high, enjoying the bliss of your ecstasy.

You watch T.V, go for a late-night walk (without being bothered by creeps, for once), and spend a lot of time lying in bed and just being happy.

By around 4 am you check your phone again. A message from Ran from 3 hours ago.

The message is sweet, he must’ve calmed down when he sent it. It’s obvious though that he’s still upset. “I love you too, Y/N. We’ll talk about it in the morning, have a good night.���

You smile at the message, telling him to have a good night too.

Only an hour later does your high end and you pass out in bed. Sleeping peacefully after the 7 hours you spent high.

You wake up 9 hours later to Ran holding you in your shared bed, calling someone.

“Probably a Bonten member,” you think. You look up at him.

When he notices you, he informs the person on the other line that he’ll call back later.

He looks down at your tired face, “How are you feeling?”

You mumble about how you feel awful, the post-MDMA depression kicking in.

You sit up in his lap, staring down at your fidgeting fingers. “So, how did you find out?”

He starts french braiding your hair as he speaks.

“I wasn’t certain until last night when I saw your teeth chattering the same way it always would when you took molly.” You can feel the tightness in your hair as he continues with the intricate design. “But I had an idea from how much more depressed you seemed lately, the dents in your necklaces, the change in your sleeping habits, and how much more impulsive you’ve been lately. I’ve been pretty sure for a solid week now.”

You tell him that it’s been going on for a month. Apologizing and telling him that things have been so hard that staying clean seems impossible. You give him your stash, the one behind the picture in the living room. He seems proud, even more when you show him that you’re blocking your plug.

You apologize, promising once again to stay sober, but this time it seems much more genuine.

At least that's what he thinks.

You’ll have to be sneakier after this withdrawal, good thing he didn’t know that you had a backup stash, and it’ll be easy to explain to your plug why blocked him.

He’ll have to try harder than that to make you sober.

[space-blue]

Star Trek SNW review through SW lens

So I finished season 1 of Strange New Worlds (Star Trek), and it's such a bitter sweet thing.

I mean, the show is sweet. It has incredible trope use, adorable characters who have rich dynamics, cool set designs even if they don't aim for hard core realism (maybe precisely because of that).

More importantly, I feel like it perfectly managed to mix "adventure of the week" with overarching plot and character arcs.

The bitterness is because I'm a Star Wars fan.

I wish SW creators would look at SNW and learn a few things. They had it going in Mando season 1, until the easter eggs morphed into the plot itself.

This show didn't feel trapped by its legacy. It wasn't afraid to recast, and to tell its own story. I'm not a big trekkie (I watched the OG series on TV reruns as a child, missed a lot of episodes. I owned the Wrath of Khan tape though, and then saw the recent trilogy. Abandoned Discovery in season 1) so there's plenty of details that flow right over my head. I'm also conscious of the people being on tumblr saying "This isn't the Spock I know".

So I'm both unlucky (for the lack of depth) and lucky (because I loved that Spock, unbothered by other interpretations of the character).

I know how being too sauced in a fandom can really impact enjoyment. Re: being a SW fan. But I feel like the approaches have been incredibly different.

Can you imagine a SW show having fun with itself? Using tropes like Body Swap or Time Travel visions in a fun and thoughtful way? Even season 1 of Mando was an endless video game fetch quest, with the odd homage to movies like Seven Samourai. It worked fine then, but season 2 really devolved into a forever-fetch-quest, only for it to be completely invalidated/made pointless by BoBF.

I was positively giddy when the body swap happened, and the following shenanigans were GOOD. Well written, not too tropey, and genuinely useful for the characters.

Also, FUCK ME but it had FOOD. It had warmth and characters bonding. But the food really got to me. It's just *never* a thing in SW. They eat bland stuff or aren't shown to eat at all. You can go an entire film without a single meal. Meals are important!! People bond over food! Food is culture! A single shot of sawdust turning into beef stew isn't interesting. Characters having a moment over a shared meal is! There's a reason you see Spock and Pike giffed in the scenes where they talk about drinking tea or finishing the dishes. Those were fun dynamic moments that highlighted the character's relationship on a simple level we all understand deep down.

Fuck, I WISH SW would just try and bother to have people keep track of some internal culture, and make us relate a little more. The fashion is so bland, the food not present. Religions never mentioned. Politics dumbed down and pushed aside. It's no wonder they have nothing left but self cannibalising and Easter Eggs all the way down.

I'm this fucking close to dropping everything I'm doing to watch all of next generation and discovery. Like, maybe trekkies are better treated as fans than us. I certainly didn't spot any rabid toy marketing in SNW!

Okay okay I'll calm down. Basically, even if you don't know anything about any of the characters, go watch SNW. It's fantastic, the characters clearly had fun with their roles. The odd stiff acting or shoddy CGI is much more excusable, the world feels deep and well realised. You don't need background knowledge to enjoy yourself. Even if Pike has stuff going on that refer to another series, they never made me feel out of the loop.

Go watch it. It's the best scifi fun I've had since the Expanse.

[r4senshurik3n]

In my Shadow || Royal Au

Author's note: I heard audio from TikTok and got inspired by it. I haven't really posted for a while, some unexpected things happened. I visited grandpa in our hometown for a few days, and I went home thinking that there would be more moments with him but a few days later we received news that he was dead, we aren't sure how and so we had to go back for the funeral and with online class things have been pretty busy so sorry for not being active.

Warnings: Use of Cuss words.

You couldn't take your scowl off your face; you couldn't believe she had the audacity to return after abandoning you, forcing you to bear the burden of a fate that was never meant to be yours. You despised this woman with every fiber of your being, but you couldn't do anything because she was your older sister—and a very useless one at that.

"Why are you back, Tsunade?" You slumped back in your chair, your fingers turning white from the grip you had on the armrests. "Why bother coming back, after you abandon me for years? I'm perfectly fine I don't need you."

"I know I hurt you okay." The blonde woman kept her head down, she didn't want anybody to see her tearing up like this, especially not her younger sister, "But please I was hurting too... My husband ripped from my grasp and Nawaki dying was the last straw, I snapped I didn't know what to do and so I ran away."

"You're a selfish bitch! You left me behind, I had to take over your responsibilities. I was the one who had to grow up because you couldn't handle the pressure your title brought upon you!" Anger poured out of you in waves, your voice rising with each word, "I was a child Tsunade! A child with a crown that was heavier than her head, what makes you think I'll forgive you just like that?"

"I lost myself, okay! You'd lose yourself if your husband died!" Tsunade looked up, tears streaming down her face, "(Y/n) you'd forget yourself if you went through what I went through!"

"Everything was fine when you weren't here, I have a husband, a child of my own, and a nation that has my back. A nation that you left behind, everything is fine because I made it fine, it was my efforts that made things fine, not yours, mine," you said as you leaned across the desk, her face mere inches from your cold glare, "I'm not weak like you Tsunade, so don't compare me to yourself."

The blonde-haired woman's look of sadness morphed into rage, "I'm done with the disrespect (Y/n)," Her jaw clenched, words spoken with gritted teeth, "You could never do what I did! I cleaned up the war's mess, you, (Y/n) could barely handle yourself when the council was nagging you to get married. I may have left you (Y/n) but you forget where you stand, I'm your elder sister god damn it, show some respect!"

"Oh, (Y/n) you forget where you stand., oh bullshit!" You replied, mocking the fuming Tsunade, "I'm not the one forgetting where I stand, it's you, Tsunade you forget where you fucking stand next to me."

You stood up, slamming your hands onto the table, "You are in my shadow." Grabbing the collar of her shirt you pulled her towards you, rage burning in your [e/c] orbs, "Act like it."

Tsunade pulled away from you, the force causing her to take a few steps back, "I was the queen you wished you were," You walked around the desk, now facing her with nothing in between, "Heck, I never should have defended you."

She felt shocked, guilt, and satisfaction. Tsunade didn't mean to slap you but clearly, she couldn't hold herself back anymore as you brought a hand to your stinging cheek, "I-I'm sorry (Y/n) I didn't mean to..."

"You know what, to be honest, your all to blame for their deaths. Nawaki died cause you thought he would be fine on the frontlines after I told you no multiple times, Dan died because you were too scared to use that stupid seal on your forehead," You scoffed, walking over to her only stopping when her back was against the wall, "Maybe it's not a coincidence that every single idea has failed under your guidance."

"You are a walking second-place medal," You turned back around to sit once again on your chair, your hands folded under your chin, "Never first, always last. Now I suggest you get out of my office before I ask the guards to drag you out myself, elder sister."

[wildeyedinwonder]

[scheduled maybe sometime]

It was the first time I met them without you. Well, barring Dua Chek's funeral at least. I hesitated plenty. I didn't know if I could do it. Didn't know if I could acknowledge that you're no longer here, if I could sit without you here.

Ko bongsu, I miss you. Where are you? Why aren't you here?

Ko bongsu, I hesitated when papa asked me if I wanted to meet the aunties because it would be the first time I met them proper without you. I hadn't dreamt of you since I realised you were dead. I can't meet you in your absence before I see you in my dreams. I just can't ever meet your absence. I can't ever meet your death.

But ko Flo, I went in the end. I decided to see them. Decided to be there for my papa, be there for everyone else, try to hold onto them before they vanished like smoke too. But ko bongsu, I felt your absence more than I felt anyone's presence. You would have liked the dishes too. You would have played with the baby. Ko bongsu, everything else hurt. Fuck, it is killing me still. I wish I never sat with your absence. I smiled and I laughed and I talked. But ko bongsu, I wished you were here and I mourned.

Nothing will be the same. How do we recover, can we? This space can't be filled and I feel like I should guard it for the rest of my life, I should protect your absence as fiercely as I prayed for your life.

Why aren't you here?

-

We try to move on. But a part of me lashes out and tortures me for trying to live. How could I love you and live on in a world without you? Is this my own destructiveness or is this my love?

You were almost immortal in my mind. I thought grace would never run out and the miracle would be everlasting. Somewhere along the line, you became family I was no longer fearful of, family I loved without guilt or fear. Where are you? Why aren't you here with us?

-

They tell me to let the dead go. They say that I am haunting the dead. Let the dead rest. Let the dead go let the dead die. But how do I stop love from morphing into grief and how do I stop grief from leaking from my eyes and breathing in loss? How can I see the world beyond moments you should be here for?

I drown.

-

Ko bongsu, ko Flo, Aunty Florence, I would give up my life if you would just come back. But even if I gave my life up, you'd still be gone.

So,

how does this world

go on?

[mrskurono]

Something my mutual pointed out while we were speaking and I wanna know your thoughts on it, no pressure. (My mutual's words, not mine and I got permission from them to share it):

‟I have a eerie feeling that Maki's family enforces extremely strict gender norms. I don't know why though. Her mom honestly seems like another victim in the situations. Since there was proof along in the manga saying that "You've sidelined mom!" implying that her mother was allegedly doing well before meeting/marrying/beginning a romantic relationship with her father.

Now, due to Maki having trouble with her body and having a...complicated relationship with femininity, her father and brother's body-shaming and rude comments affect her even more. Stuff like "Your arms are getting fatter" and "Aren't you over-doing your work out?" pretty much speaks volumes and kind of makes me think that they think that (mostly the ones they find women "small and delicate." It's pretty much like the One Piece women situation where there's only two body types: Supermodel figure and Old Hag figure

Oh and her brother's misogyny and double standards? Even worse. It pretty much shows that he doesn't really see women on the same level as men, as shown as he was baby-talking his girlfriend—which I found extremely uncomfortable and weird, but maybe that's just me. His true colours really showed when Maki (rightfully) called him out on his possible hypocrisy (saying that the nether is a dangerous place, yet he has went in it twice) and he said "You're a woman!"

To me I wish Maki would've called him out on his behaviour and sexist ways more but, they were in a life or death situation..

Pretty much, her father and brother contributes onto why she has problems with her body. All bodies of different shapes and sizes are beautiful, don't let anyone think otherwise”

That's it

- 🎲 anon

Oh the wife and I were just talking about this actually! She got to the Company Two arc and the Oze arc this morning.

Gonna put it under the cut for season 2 spoilers and bc it's probably gonna be longer than it should lol

Ok first off 100% agree with whatever the FUCK is her brother's issue. That weird fixation he has on gatekeeping Maki I honestly feel like it surpasses her parents. By a long shot. Idk if its a combination of the ideas he morphed from his parents, being in the military and all that "guy" time/"locker room" talk, or if he has a sibling rivalry with Maki. If it was a golden child vs other child I could understand it more. As Maki is certainly doted on a little more than the first born is but it's not that cut and dry and when the weird amount of anger he has at Hinawa "corrupting" and "manipulating" Maki just honestly goes past even their parents. The brother is a piece of shit. I didn't even like him at the end. I wanted Maki to punch him in the nuts and tell him to fuck off.

As for her parents, I'm going to play the devils advocate for them both here. Where I see it's easy to point out "Her dad is a bad guy, her mom is a victim and both of them control Maki" I just wholeheartedly don't believe that's the case.

From the conversation we got with the actual parents (who seem to have genuine feelings for each other and communicate well), it seems both of them were continuing their military careers until Maki's mom got pregnant. It sounded like she was working even while they dated and were married. But it seemed like the dynamic took on a new form once kids came into the picture.

And frankly, that's what happens. Things drastically change when you bring kids into it. You can't keep doing the same thing. And who's to know if her mom had an easy pregnancy? It might have not been an easy time (bc its not even easy when you do have a smooth pregnancy) Discounting if it was a hard pregnancy or not. The fact is problems pop up.

What if her mom wanted to breastfeed exclusively? What if her mom couldn't handle going back to work and post partum? What if there just wasn't enough support outside their marriage to help a new mom who wanted to do things a certain way? (as we saw she was and is a stubborn woman)

Taking into consideration all the things you feel and want for your kid(s) when you bring them into the world. The fact her mom stayed home just makes more sense. If she's breastfeeding it wouldn't make sense for her husband to stay home. If his salary is higher paying it doesn't make sense to take the pay cut (kids are expensive). These are all questions that my wife and I had to deal with when planning for our son. And I think to treat their situation different bc "ones a man and ones a woman" is just looking to be pissed about something. I stayed home. Giving birth was hard. Having a baby is hard. I miss my work of course. But I don't regret my choice to be a stay at home mom.

I don't feel like the mother was ever a victim. Bc frankly she still holds control over her husband and her kids and her home. Maki's dad was very doting on their mom and very clearly in love with her. And her mom obviously has the final say when they're acting up at the table so I don't feel like she was a forced housewife that just did what her husband wanted. She's a mom who values being a mom and that's part of her identity. Which is totally as legit as people who choose to not have that be a big part for their lives.

As for the "forcing Maki" back from the 8th. I honestly get it. I will with every fiber of my being dissuade my son from going into the military. It's bad enough he has to sign up for the draft. Bc if I could guarantee a job that's well paying, safe and close to home, no freaking duh I'd want him to do that. No parent (worth a damn) wants their kid in danger and wants to give their kid the world. Obviously as parents we learn in the end that our kids will do and make choices on their own. Whatever they might be but we always worry about them being safe and coming home to us.

I think the only way it would have really been depicted as "abusive" is if her parents didn't get past it. If they still spent all their time trying to control Maki. But they don't. After Maki states her wants and needs they accept it without a second thought. They don't try to keep making her do what they want. Or gaslighting her into thinking she can't do it. They just let her do what she feels is right with their support.

Between Maki and her parents I def feel like there was some communication issues and accepting your kid isn't you little baby is hard. But they grew from it and it changed so I don't think her parents are that terrible. They're just worried parents. Her brother on the other hand, is gross. And I don't know where the fuck he got his weird ideas from honestly. Their dad is not that bad.

[shraqsmuses]

"Maybe you dont get as much attention because you aren't big enough?" *they retrieve about 50$ of fast food and soda, laying it all in front of her like a feast* "though that can be remedied~"

(Don't worry. If you're interested in reading this, I can say that this isn't as violent as my last drabble. It makes up for it with plenty of angst.)

"Yeah... Because I'm not big enough. I can think of several other reasons why people don't give me attention but you can go off. It's not like I give a shit about anything you'll say to me when after you gave me all of this food to ea-"

"Hey."

"AGH, what the hell?! You're already back?!"

"Yes. It was rather pleasant to be revived by Palutena but it was even more pleasant to be digested by you, Bad Girl. Have you noticed any changes in your body?"

"Any changes? Lemme check."

Bad Girl groped her sizable breasts and pushed them against each other before she moved her hands toward her plump belly, delving her fingertips into it and wobbling it before she gave it two final pats, making it rustle underneath her tight, yet billowy dress.

"Hmm. My boobs haven't changed a bit but my stomach's gotten a bit pudgier. Of course, they're still bigger than yours despite that so don't bother trying to argue with me about that. Also, I figured you would be the kind of freak who would enjoy feeling like absolute shit. That's why you let me smack your tits, right?"

"Partially. I mainly let you take out your anger upon me so I could have an audience with Despair. It's been a while since I met them."

"So that's what this is about. Well, if you're gonna go on about despair or whatever, then I would suggest taking your philosophical bullcrap and jamming it into someone else's ears."

"But they spoke of you as well. Do you not wish to hear what Despair thinks of you?"

"Quit acting like despair is a person, dipshit! It's just a word! Even if they were real, what makes you think I would care about a single thing they say? They sound like someone who would spew out constant, meaningless bullshit out of their mouth, just like what you're doing right now."

"... Charlotte Birkin. You weren't always a killer, weren't you? You haven't a clue of what to do after you were kidnapped by the organisation Shigeki Birkin, your father, worked for, did you?"

"..."

"You were morphed into the mould of a killer and yet, little Charlie refuses to fully take the form of one. As such, you blindly fight and attempt to kill anyone who tries to steer you away from the life you chose for yourself or rather... The life THEY chose for you. You hear her voice, right? The one that rasps at your mind whenever you're granted a moment of respite. Heed its pleas, Charlotte. Don't let your last speck of innocence fade from your fragile mind, lest you give in to Despair's allure and tumble down a pit that'll rattle your mind until Charlie's body is forcefully contorted into the mould that was made for her."

"... Fucking know-it-all. You think that's what it takes t-"

"Cry."

"..."

"I can see the tears flowing out of your eyes. You can cry if you want to."

"But... I don't want to..."

"Because you're afraid of anyone thinking any less of you than they already do. Is that not why you seek a companion who lacks a bias against you? Someone you're somewhat familiar with so the interactions between the two of you aren't entirely alien? Someone by the name of Shinobu Jaco-"

"Shut the FUCK UP ALREADY!"

"... I will."

"Snnf... Is that what you wanted to do? Make me cry, you heartless bitch? Fine! Watch me bawl my eyes out like the stupid, pathetic, rotten skank I am! Mmmrph... Just bringing up her name like you didn't know how I felt about it... You fucking psycho. I don't care what anyone might think of me but that ninja chick... I doubt she barely knows a single thing about me even though we both worked for the same association. Well, 'association.' What kind of dumbass association is the United Assassins Association supposed to be? H-Heh, snff… Look… I don't wanna have a heart-to-heart with you, Junko. I… I don't want to talk to anyone in this blog. I just want to see Shinobu again. I want to see if I can get something going with her. That's probably not gonna happen since she's actually a decent fucking person. Well, as decent as a killer can be. I would prefer it if you could just leave me alone for a while but knowing how much you know about me, you probably aren't gonna leave until I ask you the thing you want to hear from me. Junko… Do you forgive me?"

"... Not yet."

"Yeah. I figured that you wouldn't entirely forgive me."

"Before I forgive you, I just want you to know that…

"Afastballisheadingrighttoyourtitsat105MPHandwiththatyou'reforgivenokaybye-"

Junko skipped to her side right before a baseball launched itself right into Bad Girl's round, malleable cleavage, knocking her straight to the ground with a gruelling yell, the clattering of several plates, the flattening of an array of paper bags, and the plops of a few teardrops. The fat on her breasts rose between the fingers of her gloved hands as tightly gripped the crimson mark upon her chest. The perpetrator of this sudden assault snorted and chortled as her twin tails swung in the air and her unseen chest wobbled in union with the rest of her rotund body and her swollen cheeks which peeked underneath her skirt.

A canvas of condiments, bread crumbs, frosting, and carbonated drinks spread itself across the entirety of her back and buttocks, leaving two round blots of absolute hedonism onto the flood after Bad Girl rolled to her side and cradled her breasts between her palms and knees. A pair of streams trailed down her cheeks and pooled underneath her tense chin, moisturising it before it rose above the ground and unhinged itself toward the one who lowered it there.

"AAAGH, YOU BASTARD! I'm… I'M GONNA BEAT YOU INTO A FUCKING PULP THE NEXT TIME YOU SHOW YOUR UGLY-ASS MUG TO ME! Eugh, the shitty food is all over my back and ass! I'M GONNA MAKE YOU CLEAN ALL OF THIS TOO, YOU DOUCHEBAG! Agh, fuuuuUUUUUCK!"

"Ahuhuhuhuhu~! Just as Hope can't be fully understood without a shred of sorrow despair possesses, Despair can't fully entice people to its influence without the joy Hope can bring them~"