#mentioned empires season 2

[daydreaminglifelesslove]

it’s incredibly sweet and mind boggling how joe hills and oli theorionsound seemingly met by fated chance and coincidental accident because of the hermitcraft x empires planned crossover, of joe hills spawning and ending close to where oli was coming from on empires season 2, of after the hermits getting back home after being trapped on empires — bringing the empires season 2 cast over via the opened rift, of oli on hermitcraft/streaming it on twitch getting himself accidentally killed in situations and needing anyone free online to help. that being joe, who kept helping and coming to oli when he got himself into situations and trying to keep him alive. and them outweirding and being funny chaotic guys and because oli was playing a bard on empires and is a guy who goes into song whenever irl when he wants, just them connecting and building a unlikely but extremely works well friendship for the while. and coming to the now, august of year 2023, of empires s2 being done, the rift in grians basement being closed to the multiverse of empires s2 before s2 was finished, joe hills a couple days ago on youtube stream minecraft chat messaging cubfan saying he misses oli - his bard, who he knows is in pirates smp now currently, and wants him back and how cub whose been stealing things for the museum should take a piece of the rift or somehow turn it on to work to bring oli back. also oli on twitter replying to joe hill’s tweet progress of his pinball machine he’s making on hermitcraft and wanting to play it. pls. get oli back on hermitcraft, somehow multidimensionally pull him back on, he wants to be on, joe hills misses him, please.

[scribbling-dragon]

scott for an au i am working on,, watcher’s nest cafe. if you’re interested (some details under the cut)

- has been working at the watcher’s nest (cafe) for the past four years

- was a fashion/textiles student. now works at the cafe full time

- co-workers with jimmy and pearl, was also co-workers with grian too, but he quit

- is part-siren, though he’s never used his voice to charm someone out of something since he was ten - there’s no need to use it when he can steal something just as easily without it ;)

- has an old pocket watch, something which many people have questioned him over, seeing as said watch is broken and stuck at a particular time. he keeps it in his pocket anyway

[fogwitchoftheevermore]

thinking about the vaguely cannon state of the empires musical again and i think we should exploit that for as much comedy as possible. oli falls out of afterlife and is like “sausage please you have to recognize me from somewhere” and sausage just goes “wait a minute… aren’t you the narrator from the ocean queen musical?” and oli just sort of stares at him for ten minutes before officially giving up.

[umbrify]

Once again I am thinking about e!Jimmy and e!fWhip, and I’m looking at how fWhip is behaving regarding being fired, and it’s making me think. Because the obvious interpretation of this would be that it’s a power play, right? fWhip has Jimmy ousted and becomes the new sheriff by virtue of being the deputy, that’s how it looks on the surface, right? But I just can’t bring myself to read it that way with all the surrounding context.

Like, in fWhip’s episode 12, he goes around and marks down all the laws that he’s saying Jimmy is breaking around Tumble Town, but just look at the list [5:54]:

1. Unsafe working area outside of home. Could result in death. Disrespectful to own safety as sheriff. 2. Disrespecting personal health with poor diet. 3. Disrespecting self with disorganized storage room; forcing Norman Deputy #1 to live in a MESS. 4. Disrespecting Sheriff badge by not wearing it proudly. 5. Not keeping peace with Sanctuary by keeping a villager of Sanctuary in a CAGE. 6. Not respecting his empire by keeping the railroad closed. Breaking law #5. 7. Not providing own people with enough water to drink.

Of the seven instances that fWhip writes down, SIX of them almost directly relate to Jimmy not taking good care of himself or his empire. To me, it almost reads more like he cares about Jimmy, and is worried about him.

And this wouldn’t be out of line at all for fWhip, as we’ve seen multiple instances of him caring about Jimmy in the past. We can see it in Jimmy’s episode 9, when he and fWhip serve the lawsuit papers to Joel, and as Joel chases them off while shouting that Jimmy is a toy and doesn’t have rights, fWhip turns around and says “every type of creature in this land has rights,” shoving Joel back. We again see this during the court case itself, best seen from Jimmy’s episode 10, not only in the sheer effort fWhip puts in (building the whole courthouse in Gobland, being very clearly much more prepared than his opponent), but also in the way he repeatedly comforts Jimmy during and after the trial when Jimmy gets upset [4:50, 9:54, 10:12, 12:03, 12:43]. We even see fWhip directly interpose when Joel tries to initiate trial by combat, stepping in front of Jimmy and drawing his sword [11:32].

This wouldn’t be the only time fWhip comforts Jimmy as well. In Sausage’s episode 14, we see an interaction between fWhip and Jimmy at Scott’s tavern. Scott shows them around, telling them about the toy sheriffs he keeps in all the rooms [6:35]. fWhip stops Jimmy from stealing the toys, standing in front of him and reminding him to keep peace, and Jimmy leads him into the next room, where this conversation can be overheard [7:44]:

Jimmy: “fWhip, we can’t have this. fWhip we can’t have this! This is insane!”

fWhip: “I think he’s just uh, he’s just trying to agitate you, he’s really trying to get you to uh, turn on him.”

Jimmy: “What do you think I should do?”

fWhip: “I think if we just ignore it, he’ll get bored, and we just move on”

The two then exit the room and Jimmy leaves shortly after. fWhip talked Jimmy down from acting rashly here and potentially making even more enemies.

It’s also seems to me that it’s pretty clear that fWhip wants to be deputy specifically, not the sheriff. In fWhip’s episode 8, we see him build Jimmy a home in Gobland, saying “I wanna show the sheriff that we respect him, so I’ve been working on a little bit of a pathway back here, because I wanna be a very valuable deputy number two” [19:33]. In Jimmy’s episode 9, we see fWhip very proudly displaying his deputy badge on his outfit, alongside his eagerness to help Jimmy with whatever he needs [4:30].

All of this to say that I don’t really understand fWhip’s actions that we see take place in Sausage’s episode 20 [scene starts at 7:03 and ends at 16:04]

The scene opens with Sausage arriving to add the Sanctuary banner to the Tumble Town alliance building. Shortly after he arrives, we hear fWhip asking where he should place the Gobland banner, saying “Where do I put my banner? Cause we’re still allies” [7:48]. Jimmy tries to lead fWhip away, and fWhip deliberately pretends not to hear him, forging on and placing his banner- the banner that, as far as I can tell, did not exist before this moment, meaning that fWhip made a banner specifically to place in Jimmy’s alliance building. fWhip then starts what feels like a very deliberate conversation with Sausage in order to try and ignore Jimmy telling him off [8:16]. This whole scene, to me, reads as if fWhip isn’t sure how to handle the conflict and is instead trying to avoid having it all together, still wanting to remain friendly with the sheriff. Once Jimmy finally manages to get an edge in, telling Sausage he doesn’t care about his story in the process, Jimmy leads them to the church where he tries to confront fWhip directly.

And this is where it gets a little strange. fWhip again tangents off with Sausage for a while, avoiding the conflict, before Jimmy finally snaps at Sausage to shut up. Sausage starts crying, and fWhip tries to comfort him, saying “I’m sorry the mean sheriff yelled at you, he doesn’t have emotions okay? He doesn’t have emotions. When you’re made of plastic, you don’t have emotions” [9:29]. fWhip then goes on to say that Jimmy can’t fire him because he was never hired properly [10:09] and that he never even arrested anyone officially [10:57].

It feels like some kind of rationalization to me. Like fWhip is trying to rationalize the fact that he’s done so much for Jimmy and never gotten anything back in return. He must just be like that because he’s a toy, surely. That must be why, it’s not his fault, it’s not his fault. He’s grasping at straws, looking for any way to try and help Jimmy with what authority he has, and he needs to keep that authority to be able to do that.

When Jimmy later asks what laws he’s broken, fWhip, instead of showing Jimmy the book he wrote before, or even reading it out for him, takes the law book and points out a misspelling in it, as well as saying Jimmy killed the Tumble Town Bandits [11:36].

I found this quite strange at first, why would he not tell Jimmy all the other laws he’s broke- laws that largely pertain to Jimmy’s own well-being, until I thought about a specific moment from Jimmy’s episode 9, where he asks fWhip to be his lawyer [4:43]:

Jimmy: “I need you to pretend to be my lawyer, okay? […] I’ve actually got you a little costume? A costume change? Cause I don’t want them to be like ‘oh that’s just- that’s just fWhip-‘ y’know? ‘That’s just fWhip the goblin’ […] I want you to kind of be in disguise”

When fWhip was acting as Jimmy’s lawyer- as someone other than himself, that’s when his care for Jimmy was most evident. It seems like fWhip has an easier time expressing his care in indirect ways, through actions and guises of being someone else, like he’s not very good at expressing his emotions. This would also line up with the way he pointedly tried to avoid the confrontation with Jimmy in Sausage’s episode 20 from before- he didn’t know how to handle those emotions, so he tried to forge on like everything was fine.

Then there’s the threat of election, and accounting for everything else fWhip has done regarding Jimmy, it really feels like it’s less of a “you’re corrupt and evil and we need to get rid of you” and more of a “you’ve got a lot on your shoulders and I’m worried it’s changing you for the worse, and I’m worried that you haven’t been taking care of yourself, so if you can’t balance both of those things then maybe it’s best if you step down.”

Basically what I’m saying is, I feel like fWhip really cares for Jimmy and is worried about him, but just isn’t sure how to communicate that in any way that Jimmy will understand, because Jimmy jumps to conclusions too quickly and fWhip has the emotional intelligence of a rock and isn’t sure how to express himself.

[zenixromeave]

mcyt is so crazy because you'll be watching a guy who goes "teehee!" and has a cute, giggly high-pitched silly voice and 100% of the time it is a grown-ass man with a beard built like a brick shithouse

[remyisme]

Empires fic but they find out about their past lives somehow

there are multiple identity crisis's

Fwip is trying to figure out why he had such a drastic species change compared to everyone else

him and Gem are also freaking outa both the whole siblings thing

so are Jimmy and Lizzie

Oli is desperately trying to explain his backstory to False because she's somehow convinced herself that she's Xornoth

speaking of Xornoth, Scotts pretty freaked out about the whole "yeah, so, you have a brother thing"

False has yet to read that far

[jimmytimmyjames]

empires truly is thee smp. there is nothing else like it. what even is an smp if jimmy isn't being bullied and desired by everyone; if lizzie and joel aren't being insanely funny, and making oblique references to the fact that they are literally married irl; if oli theorionsound and falsesymmetry aren't being isekai'd into the second season; if the creators don't have their characters take each other on dates and have kids and homoerotic rivalries. every single creator in this series is gold, and when you stick them all in the same lore-driven world, the genuinely quality story-telling and the insane shenanigans surpass anything else ever. each of their dynamics is perfect tbh. i love you empires smp members i love each and every one of you

[cjorgens2022]

Bad Batch Season 3

I was asleep for a good moment. Then I saw visions of Hunter and Wrecker being the ones to die at the end of the season while Omega, Crosshair and Echo are too survive.

another thing is that in another part of my bad batch dreams is that Tech, as CX-2 had Hunter in binds whole guiding him to the shuttle silently before holding a deep conversation with Hunter.

then, Wrecker would seize Tech aka CX-2 much to the latter’s displeasure while, an unusually alive Plo Koon watched!

[stultusism]

[circesays]

The Beginning and the Discovery (Part 1)

The Betrayal (Part 2)

The Change (Part 3)

The Shelter (Part 4)

It was a beautiful day in Stratos. The birds were singing, the people were content, and The God of Lore was as handsome, strong, sexy, and wonderful as ever.

(Every day was beautiful, in Stratos, rain or shine. How could it not be, when run by the perfect God?)

On days like this, Joel knew exactly what he should be doing.

Messing with Jimmy, of course!

He even brewed a little something special for the occasion, because he’s so kind and generous and giving like that. He’d already sent out a message to some of the other rulers online about his incredibly devious plans for the day, and they were eagerly awaiting the results. All that was left to do was find his favorite toy.

(A thousand miles away, a Sheriff rested on the steps under the cover of his office, and waited.)

As Joel began his effortless descent into the dustbowl, he snickered as he saw the new building style that Jimmy had adopted. The dollhouses looked rather adequate, if he did say so himself! A very Jimmy style of building, plain and uninteresting.

(Jimmy walked out to meet the god. He was sick and tired of this. He wanted his home back.)

“Oh Jimmy! I brought a little gift for you,” Joel called out as he landed, a small cloud of dust rising outward.

The Sheriff didn’t have time to get another word in before he was completely soaked in the strange potion.

(And oh, how it burned. It ached and tore through him without a shred of mercy or a pause to breathe. If the wire in his throat weren’t strangling him, Jimmy would’ve screamed.)

(But the string pulled taut.)

He vaguely noted the other rulers swooping in, hooting and pointing in glee. The Sheriff only had the strength to raise his head to stare at them.

(Giants. His friends fellow rulers were giants, cooing and mocking him, staring down at his tiny form. )

“Joel, how have you done this?!” He managed to strangle out, his voice cracking and hoarse.

(It’s been so long since he’d talked to anybody.)

He caught a few words, something about a “Potion of Truth,” and “his true form,” but the Sheriff could barely follow in his shock.

“Oh guys, you’re not going to believe this, it gets better!” Joel laughed, picking the now-panicking Jimmy up.

He turned him over to reveal-

(The string, the string, the string. Pulling taut, choking, muting him, he couldn’t talk, he couldn’t protest-)

“There’s a snake in my boot!”

(And the others howled and laughed in delight, passing him back and forth to tug at his the string.)

“Reach for the sky!”

(And as the wire tugged tighter, Jimmy could not say a word of his own.)

“Howdy there, partner!”

(And if the Sheriff had the air, he would’ve screamed until they stopped. Until they realized that everything was wrong.)

Finally, finally, Joel set him down and let go of the pullstring, insisting that they all take a selfie together.

(Jimmy could not say a word, the wire still wound up in his throat. Magic forced his face into a picture perfect smile.)

“Well, this was fun, but I have to take care of some MCC stuff. Byeeeee!” Scott giggled, taking off in a shower of colorful sparks.

(And of course, the man’s golden eye had noticed the strings around the Sheriff, but he assumed that was the shrinking potion. After all, Jimmy was the one leaning into the bit with his story magic! He was basically already consenting to all the toy jokes. It was all in good fun.)

The God of Lore grinned and chuckled, waving his friends and fellow rulers off as they went to do whatever it was they did in their free time. Probably nothing as cool as what Joel could do.

(One by one the others left, still oblivious to his distress. Was he that inhuman, that his panic was completely unnoticeable?)

The God turned to the toy sheriff and pulled something out of his inventory. A bright red, shining apple.

“Eat this, and you’ll go back to hiding your true size, and continue lying to everyone and saying that you’re not a toy. I’m out of here. I’ve got some very important business in Stratos- spoiling my beautiful son with little Sheriff toys. You should come to the toy barn soon! I’ve got a shelf waiting just for you!”

And with that, the God took off, lightning curving off his wings as his rockets propelled him into the sky. Another successful prank on Jimmy! Amazing! It went off without a hitch!

(Left alone and abandoned, the wire in his throat still pulling tight and choking, the Sheriff clutched the perfect apple in his hand.)

Yes, it was a beautiful day in Stratos. The kind of day where nothing could go wrong.

(Left alone on the ground, Jimmy clung to an apple he could not eat, and wished once again that he could weep.)

[smallishbabes]

The Smallishbeans Fan Starter Guide

Have you seen Smallishbeans in videos and/or on your dashboard and thought “hey he seems cool I wanna check him out” but don’t know where to start? Well this post is for you!

“Who is Smallishbeans?”

His name is Joel and he’s a British survival builder who appears in SMPs such as X Life, Empires SMP, and 3rd Life and does lots of challenges like doing hardcore for 24 hours, not using a crafting table, and spending 100 days in a world to name a few. He’s the MCC competitor who keeps spilling his keyboard and had to get a sippy cup for the tournament, first person to ever 1v3 and did it against pink parrots MCC 8, won MCC 10, and attained the lordship Joel Jumperman after getting 8th place in MCC 9. He’s also LDShadowLady’s husband and frequently collabs with her. He was initially known for playing Call of Duty, in fact Smallishbeans was his Xbox gamertag, but now he’s the Joel we all know and love, who loves to cook, loves his wife, is a big nerd, got two pets, loves to mess with his friends, and play in block game :)

He also looks like this, this, and this (the last one is his og skin and the one his current skin is based off of):

And here are a few examples of his builds:

“Where can I find him?”

He posts videos and streams on Youtube. He usually streams when it’s MCC b/c he personally doesn’t like the stress of streaming but he has streamed plenty of times before in the past. As of when I’m writing this, he’s planning on streaming more during Empires season 2. He also has a Twitter and Instagram if you wanna check him out elsewhere. His channel also links to his clips channel, Smallishbeans Clips, and extra videos channel called, More Smallishbeans.

“Where do I start?”

Anywhere! He doesn’t have any heavy lore if that’s what you’re worried about. I think the only thing he references is Jeremyism, which is a religion centered around naming everything Jeremy and also praying to Donkey Jeremy which he did during X Life. Joel doesn’t reference other series too unless it’s multiple seasons and he usually mentions it offhandedly. I’d say just start with a one off video or short series and then move to a long series.

“How would you describe him?”

Extra, sarcastic, overconfident while also being insecure, crazy, mean girl, pathetic, funny, angry short king, and bi wife

“What videos do you recommend?”

I’ll give you my favorites!

1.16-1.17 100 days series

24 hrs of hardcore again

Empires season 1 & season 2

Double life series

Last life series

100 hours of hardcore

Him making mcyters do parkour for money

X Life series

“Any Smallishbeans blogs you recommend?”

Aside from me, there’s also minecraftbee, sarioh, elbowreveal, mcytheap, pebbltree, condorclaw, unicornhazel, savviathan, navy-leader, pockopeas, harley-the-pancake, king-of-mezalea, digdeepergravedigger09, renchanters, and devilart2199-aibi. Obviously there’s tons more I haven’t listed, but these are good to start with. (Also if you’re a Joel blog and reblog this, feel free to use this post to promote yourself. The more Joel blogs the better)

That’s all you need to know! If you have any further questions or if you just wanna talk about Joel, feel free to ask me! I admit, I’m not a Joel encyclopedia, but I’d be happy to help as best as I can! Have fun watching him! :D

[goldenwitherphoenix13]

Thank you Jimmy and Joel. Thank you both for creating Tiny Tom. He is now my favourite child, I love him and I will protect him.

Also I made a design.

Tiny Tom everyone! I love this little enderian lad! He may feel a bit modern in style, but I like this design so I'm sticking with it. I'll just say Jevin modernised his outfit or something idk imma be quiet now. ENJOY!

[the-stronghold]

She grins wide when he asks her hand in an alliance.

"Of course," she responds. Knowing well that a solid hold on this land may rest on having someone who can speak well to her name. "I'll have your back so long as you have mine."

"Absolutely!" he says, shaking her hand before sailing off to his refuge.

And the princess smiles. Fangs just the smallest bit bared as she turns out towards the setting sun. She lets her hand pass through the crops.

Another day, another step forward. And Princess Gem feels secure in this land she plans on claiming. Her empire would flourish and her people would be well fed.

She just needed to make sure the others didn't immediately call her an enemy. They have a right to be afraid of a daywalker, of course, but Gem thinks she has this one in the bag.

Nobody suspects a princess.

[thesupernaturalhouse]

Here's soem facts about the mama witch au!! Specifically about the little family

●Oli is the first to call Shelby mom, False is slower but she eventually gets there

●the both take longer to call Katherine their mom, tho, first time they do is when...well, I haven't decided WHEN but i know it's when they see her get hurt

●like, Kath gets shot with an arrow going over to the evermoore at night. And she shows up, slightly woozy, Shelbys already getting a potion and the medical stuff ready to pull out the arrow, and then the twins come in

●and they are immortal panicked and are liek "MOM!? WHAT HAPPENED ARE YOU OKAY!?" And Kaths to woozy to really process it. But shekby hears it and she is just so proud they feel comfort enough aroudn them to give them those titles.

●you know how there's that meme of the dad sleeping on a recliner? That's just Katherine

●she's exhausted from running a kingdom and fixing everything and now she has ti deal with a Pirate named joey-

●False is the oldest cause she actually knows when her birthday is

●well she knows what the legal day is since she was dropped of at the orphanage-

●False and Oli will randomly set fires when their parents aren't looking

●Shelby goes into the hosue to make a potion nd she comes out 5 minutes later to see the twins holding a stuffed animal ieve the fire like soem sort of sacrificial offering

●Joel is just chilling and suddenly there's flames and a Teddy bear in the middle of his house. He is terrified.

●Oli is the more outgoing of the twins, False is the more weary type

●so it takes a while before she's comfortable being her crazy self with Oli who goes crazy immortal

●wanna hear soemthing angsty? False reminds Shelby of her, just a little but, their both Elytrans who escaped from a bad place at 11. Difference is that Shelby was at the palce for 11 years while Galse was only there for maybe a week.

●now for soem comfort, Shelby is keeping uo the tradition of finding kids in a random forest and taking them home!

●her grandma did it with her, Sandy si mroe of a mom figure however since she's like 60 when she gets Shelby they go by grandma.

●plus everyone at the town saw her as a grandma/mom sort of figure, so yeah, still shelby will switch between mom and grandma often

All have to do more later but for now that's all!!

[not-actually-lost]

EMPIRES SMP II SPOILERS (SAUSAGE’S VID)

the fox talking to sausage about their kid missing:

lizzie:

[the-splodge]

I appreciate that Empires False and Oli are both isekai protagonists, but are having VASTLY different situations and reactions