#missing a relationship that never existed

[enanansbbg]

Anhane’s relationship, and it’s complexity:

this was originally uploaded onto twt, but I wanted to reupload it here because I was very proud of this analysis, so please enjoy and feel free to add anything I may have missed or skipped over!

With that being said, here we go! ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

Let’s start with the basics. The pure power of their aibouness, and its connections to vivid street.

To begin, you must understand what a partner is in VBS terms. In this case, it’s ‘a person who brings out parts of you never knew existed’.

In relations to Anhane, this is based off pure raw emotions. This is shown through An’s abandonment issues and Kohane’s want to make her heart pound.

Kohane wants to recreate that feeling she felt when she first heard An singing inside of An, to ‘make her heart pound’, while An’s abandonment issues cause her to fear Kohane’s rapid growth may lead to Kohane abandoning her.

This also plays into a certain factor about Kohane and the idea of her and angst, I believe.

Many people want Kohane to have some kind of angst event, especially related to her backstory, but that would go against all her motives.

See, Kohane’s pure movies for pursuing music—for working to surpass Rad Weekend all tie back to An. It was hearing An singing at WG that made her heart pound and An asking her to be her singing partner that caused her to even consider music as an option.

From here, their relationship develops into a lot more, and it’s when the idea of partners ‘bringing out an ugly side of you’ comes to play.

You can see even in the maim story An not seeing Kohane as an equal. It only gets called out and resolved in Singing in Sync.

Singing In Sync, ep. 1 and 3

🎧: “In the unlikely event that something does go wrong, I’ll cover for you and get you back on track, okay?”

…

🎧: “I failed as her partner…I couldn’t protect her…

…

🎧: “I mean, she’s my partner…And I wanted to guide her so that she could sing without worrying…”

…

🥞: “You don’t think of Kohane as one of the team.”

An telling Kohane “I’ll protect you if you mess up” subconsciously puts the idea into Kohane’s head “I’m not good enough, so I’ll probably mess up” This is what caused the entire issue in SIS to begin with.

But it’s once An tells her “you can protect me too” that Kohane is able to subconsciously think “I have the power to make her heart pound too”

Singing in Sync, ep. 8

🎧: “If I miss a cue at the next event…”

🎧: “Could you cover for me?”

🐹: “An… Sure, I can do that!”

After this we get Awakening Beat. Kohane is able to come out of her shell and fully adapts the idea “I can make her heart pound too” and has a large boost in confidence because of it. An both brought her confidence down and back up in the spam of one rotation.

Awakening Beat, ep. 8

🎧: (“It’s like she’s not even the Kohane I know. Could this be because she’s completely resolved herself?”

🎧: (“But even with just that, she can really change this much…?”)

However….In the same event, An’s insecurities begin to bloom and in Bout for Beside You, An has to face them for the first time.

Awakening Beat, ep. 8, BFBY, ep. 4

🎧: (“I was just gonna tell her she did amazing… That I never knew she could sing that amazingly, but…”

🎧: (“What’s going on? I just can’t get the words out—”)

…

🎧: “Kohane is…going to leave me behind?”

Here, An realizes her and Kohane ‘perfect’ relationship is more complicated now. While Kohane’s adapted the idea of “I want to make her heart pound”, An opens to idea of “I wont he able to make her heart pound anymore” (they doki doki more than ddlc i swear)

At the end of the event, An ask Kohane the golden question. “If I were to leave somewhere far away, would we still sing together?”

BFBY, ep. 8

🎧: “But what would you do if I said that I’d be going somewhere far far away someday?”

🎧: “And I wanted to reach greater heights just like what Uncle Taiga did exploring the world. If I were to go to someplace even greater and far far away from here—”

Of course, Kohane affirms this. Naturally, Kohane takes a lot of pride in being An’s partner, being the only partner for her. (as said in ORS) She wants to keep singing with An forever.

BFBY, ep. 8

🐹: “Even so, I would want to keep singing with An-chan!”

🐹: “No matter where you go or what you become, I’d still want to be with you!”

🐹: “I want to properly stand beside you and sing with you!”

We’re gonna skip ahead a bit and jump up to KIUAN, where we get our lovely “She looks like Nagi-san” line, the line that killed every Anhane shipper in the tristate area.

But what makes this line so special? Well, for that let’s discuss what made Nagi’s death (and the lie surrounding it) so impactful.

Nagi was someone An looked up to highly. So, when she was suddenly told that Nagi moved, not even saying goodbye, to pursue her music career, it left a mark on An. Added to the fact that Nagi wasn’t returning An’s messages or calls, just completely disappeared.

Now, looking to Bout for Beside you and KIUAN, you can see the importance of these lines. An fears that Kohane will improve so much that she leaves without a word, never talks go her again and just moves on. It’s why she looks so distressed.

VOT ep. 8, BFBY, ep. 8, KIUAN ep. 7

🎧: “…Aww. I wonder what Nagi-san is doing over in America? I wish she’d give us a call at least.”

🎧: “Ah! Maybe I’ll send her a text then! I wonder if she’ll be surprised~?”

…

🎧: “But what would you do if I said that I’d be going somewhere far far away someday?”

…

🎧: “…She looks just like Nagi-san…”

And, it’s why she can’t even believe Kohane when she says just how important An is to her, how much she loves her and wants to sing with her because Nagi said the same thing and now Nagi is gone.

This manages to reach a resolve in WTWG, where An ‘fights’ Kohane, takes all those raw emotions out in a healthy way, through her song.

An’s card in WTWG is more than just ‘An takes her anger out on Kohane’, because in truth that’s not entirely what she’s doing. Instead, it’s An’s raw emotions taking form.

An wants Kohane to grow, she wants Kohane to thrive fully, but that fear of abandonment—Fear that Kohane will leave and never speak to her again makes her want to hold her close and never let her go anywhere.

So what about Kohane?

Well, starting with thr WTWG card/story, Kohane wants to be An’s best partner. As she states, ‘to make An’s heart pound’.

So, to be vulnerable here is to accept all of An’s raw emotions. Let her lean on her and feel everything because to Kohane, that makes her a worthy partner.

She says over and over throughout the fight that An is amazing, that she wants to be like her, how much it makes her heart pound. Really, it reminds me of Kohane’s colorfes story.

WTWG, ep. 7

🐹: (“An-chan…really is amazing.”)

🐹: (“…Whenever I hear An-chan sing, it really makes my heart pound like nothing else. It makes me wish I could sing like her.”)

In it, Kohane goes to Vivid Street, but everyone thinks she’s An. This happens after she thinks about what it would be like to be An, but only going through this dream does she realize that she doesn’t want to be An, she wants to be her. She wants to be An’s partner.

Colorfes Kohane ep. 1 and 2

Record Store Onee-san: “You caught me off guard, using polite like that, An-chan!”

🐹: (“Did she just say An-chan…?”)

…

🐹: (“—An-chan’s so cool and strong…and there’s times I wish I could be like her…”)

🐹: (“I have to be me! Because—”)

🎧: “—Y’know, I was thinking, your singing is always so amazing, Kohane.”

🎧: “Whenever I hear your singing, it makes my heart race. The tension rises, and it makes me feel like I have to start singing right now!”

🐹: (“Because I’m An-chan’s partner—!”)

And to be An’s partner, is to drag all those raw, vertical emotions out of An, just like she does in WTWG.

In conclusion, Anhane explosion their relationship is so complex and strong and I love it

[celestialtarot11]

Moon in the 12h

Hey friends! Welcome back to another post focusing on the moon in the 12h! 🤍 just to spread some awareness on this placement. There’s a lot of great posts shedding light on this placement already ✉️ hoping to expand more on this post in the future in combination with esoteric astrology 👀 feel free to like comment & reblog! divider creds: @fairytopea

Natives with moon in the 12h often are left feeling excluded. Its not that they hate what is around them necessarily, but rather its what they wish they had that isn't in front of them. It often stems from family issues.

They want that safe happy family everyone else seems to have. Some natives may even look at other family through rosed colored glasses, projecting their fantasies, missing the idea that other families can struggle too.

But to 12h natives, its not just a fantasy. Its their inner child longing to be safe, to be held.

Moon in the 12h natives often grow up to understand what happens around them externally is essentially a product of their behavioral patterns.

Moon 12h aspects (square, opposition, conjunction)

Moon-saturn aspects often experience neglect, isolation during their hardest times by biological family and what they consider friends. The native clings to what sabotages them over and over, until they withdraw completely. Either that—or life has torn apart their relationships to show them they cant hold onto what is falling apart. It gives them no control to show them what they can control. And that is their ego, how they treat themselves. Their perspective, habits, etc.

Moon-pluto can result in the native feeling confused as to what their desires are. What their true nature is. They’re wrapped up in selling a persona someone else liked, in order to be validated. They get lost in fueling others so much they forget themselves. They can act as a, “pick me up,” easily. But when it comes to helping themselves the native may cope with unhealthy mechanisms. The native can experience views of self victimization, learned helplessness and obsessive tendencies towards others.

Moon-pluto aspects often experience turbulence regarding the mother. The mother could have been absent for some part of their life—or a female figure that was considered a guardian to the native, abandoned them. That female figure then became manipulative, trying to take advantage of the native’s emotions. This mother or guardian figure abandoned the native in times of need, and also forced the native to take responsibility that was never theirs to begin with.

Both saturn & pluto here force the native to grow up faster than necessary.

Regarding the father figure for moon-saturn aspects, or a male guardian to the native, the figure was cold. Demanding, harsh, and inflexible. The figure could have enforced strict rules to not allow the native to socialize—often pinning their fears onto the native. It’s very possible the father figure engaged in self sabotage in front of the native openly.

Moon-neptune aspects get consumed by energy completely. They become one with the energy in the room. Therefore if surrounded by toxicity, and negative energies the native can fall sick because of it (mentally, and physically speaking.)

These natives are the type to daydream about having the perfect family to feel safe in their heads. They block everything out that hurts them, and then eventually takes their feelings out on themselves. These natives possibly struggled with being seen as “less than,” in the family. Misogynistic parents or friends, parents or friends who belittle them, victimize themselves and yet expect the native to grow up—all whilst keeping the native “stuck” in a naive mindset.

Harsh expectations in their environment to be perfect all the time. Mental health? Basically does not exist in this environment. Same can be said for moon-saturn and pluto aspects.

Moon-mars aspect dealt with verbally aggressive environments, perhaps physical too. There is always someone trying to be “better,” than the native, or showcase their skills to seem higher than the native. Comparison, competition and jealousy often were in the household. Its very likely this came from a mother or female figure, and father figure/male figure as well.

The native dealt with roughhousing and learned to develop a sharp tongue to keep themselves safe. As a result they can be anxious, defensive as a way to protect their emotions. They’d rather keep their walls up as a defense than to let others in, because when the people closest to them saw them hurt, they were met with aggression.

Moon-mars native can have a hard time regulating their emotions, and have had the people around them be so focused on the “material realm,” like money, cars, etc, to the point of neglecting their emotional health.

When moon in 12h heals…

They learn to accept their emotions for what is. Are they actually being needy, clingy, “emotional,” or human? Slowly, they unravel the narratives that were forced onto them since a young age and discover their emotions aren’t the enemy.

It’s the harmful narratives and perspective around emotions that is the enemy.

Moon in the 12h can also begin to gain perspective as to why everyone is the way they are—generally, no human is completely sane. We are all traumatized in one way or another. But they know now this isn’t an excuse for mistreatment.

Extra

Paid readings 🤍

[catofadifferentcolor]

Terrible Fic Idea #92: Percy/Apollo, but make it The Trojan War

Into every fandom, a time travel fic must fall - or in this case a second one, because I somehow got to thinking about the delightful PJO trope of Percy being thrown back in time to The Trojan War and realized that doing so misses out on a fantastic opportunity.

Or: What if post-TOA Percy Jackson and Apollo time travel to shortly before The Trojan War?

Just imagine it:

Everything follows canon through TOA, with one exception: rather than struggle to catch up in the mortal world following the Second Gigantomachy, Percy elects to stay at Camp Half-Blood. There he can homeschool at his own place with programs tailored towards ADHD children and still visit his family on the weekends - and not get into any more ridiculous situations in the mortal world when one of the gods kidnaps him or sends him on a quest to find their sneakers.

This, naturally, stresses his relationship with Annabeth - who, now that she's no longer living at camp full time, calls it the easy way out. But Percy is tired and struggling in mortal high school where everyone thinks he's a delinquent idiot when another option exists seems foolish. Percy and Annabeth break up and drift apart.

Enter Apollo, fresh from his latest stint as a mortal. He's trying to do his best by his children, which includes popping by camp as often as he can get away with - which in turn means spending a lot of time with Percy, who at this point is unofficially running CHB because it's not like Dionysus or even Chiron have done a brilliant job of it in recent times.

(First aid, strategy, and mythology classes are made mandatory. Percy personally ensures every demigod knows enough about self-defense to be able to survive long enough to run away or for help to arrive. Bullying is cracked down on so hard that it's this, not Percy's generally parental nature, that has people calling him Camp Mom.)

Percy and Apollo become friendly. Enough so that some of Apollo's kids assume they're dating and keeping it on the down-low so as not to draw Zeus' ire. Or Poseidon's. Or anyone else's. It's on one of their not-dates that they're yeeted into the past, without warning or explanation.

And so 19-year-old Percy Jackson and post-TOA Apollo find themselves in Ancient Greece c. 1220 BCE, roughly thirty-five years before the destruction of Troy.

The time travel is immediately obvious, as Apollo becomes the closest thing a god might experience to being high the moment they land in the past - being a powerful god in modern times is nothing like being a powerful god at the height of his power in ancient times. It's overwhelming (and somewhat alarming from Percy's POV, but kind of funny in retrospect.)

The specific date is harder to determine, but made clear when Hermes shows up and starts going on about you'll never believe what father's done now: he seduced the Spartan queen as a swan and she's laid an egg. Hera is furious - especially as they're saying the girl that hatched from it is the most beautiful in the world, even though she's only a few days old. It's nuts. By the way, where have you been? You missed the last two council meetings. Do you want Dad to punish you?

Apollo at this stage is very high. He's also been USTing over Percy for quite some time and is worried what the gods of this era might do to Percy without divine protection (smiting or seduction, it's all on the table). But mostly he's very high, and so to keep Percy close and safe he declares he's been off having the dirtiest of dirty weekends with his latest lover and that Hermes' presence is ruining the mood. So if he would kindly leave, please and thank you, he'd really rather get back to it without an audience.

This, naturally, is a surprise to Percy, but he rolls with it because 1) he doesn't have any better ideas on how to get rid of Ancient Greek Hermes so they can figure out what the hades is going on and 2) he's been USTing over Apollo ever since he recovered enough from Tartarus to start feeling attraction again.

Fueled by mutual UST, they put together a cover story that should hold the next time a god with too much prurient interest shows: Percy is now Prince Persē of Gadir - a Phoenician colony that will grow into the future Cadiz - well past the edge of the Greek world at this stage but not beyond belief for Poseidon to have visited, as it's obvious who his father is. They claim his mother is the King of Gadir's youngest sister and as such Persē had a royal upbringing, but was far enough down the line of succession that he was free to chose to sail east and explore his father's homeland. Apollo caught sight of him on his journey, one thing led to another, and here they are.

(Are there easier, more sensible cover stories? Possibly. But the UST refuses to let them consider any of them now that a fake relationship is on the table.)

Deciding what to do about The Trojan War is much harder. On the one hand, it's a lot of senseless death and destruction. On the other, without it we don't get The Iliad and The Odyssey - two of the most influential works of literature in western civilization - and Aeneas doesn't go off to Italy (leading to the founding of Rome, which would change the history of western civilization a lot). In the end, they decide to let the war happen but do their best to mitigate the worst parts of it.

And so Percy goes off and becomes a hero of Ancient Greece while pretending to be in a relationship with Apollo.

This stage of things is filed with angst from both parties, as both Percy and Apollo want a real relationship with each other but think they're abusing the other's trust by eagerly faking their relationship. There's a lot of PDA, a lot of feelings, and limited communication. It goes on for quite a while and would probably exasperate quite a few people if everyone in the know didn't think they were already in a relationship.

It's also filled with modern day Percy being confronted by realties of life in Ancient Greece. It's not just mortals knowing about - and interacting with - the gods: it's everything. It's food and clothes and language and culture and housing and travel. He can play a lot off it as being a traveler from the edge of the known world, but some of it has him asking Apollo if he's being rick rolled.

Apollo, meanwhile, is having troubles of his own. He is not the god he used to be and it's hard pretending otherwise. He tries to walk the line of doing enough to be believable and holding back enough not to despise himself, but it's a fine line, he fails often, and he spends a not insignificant amount of time worried he's backsliding.

And so it goes until 7-year-old Helen of Troy is kidnapped by Theseus to be his wife.

This, naturally, does not fly with Percy, who by this time has built up something of a reputation as a hero. He teams up with the Dioscuri to rescue Helen.

One would think this would earn him Zeus' favor. It doesn't. Instead, Zeus sends monsters to harry him for refusing to let Castor and Pollux take Helen's captors' loved ones captive and raze Aphidna for Theseus' crime. Percy manages to hold his own for quite a while but eventually, exhausted from the near-constant fighting, is gored and left for dead by the reformed Minotaur.

...and when Apollo arrives, frantic, to heal him, Percy ascends instead, becoming the greek version of Saint Sebastian - a minor god of heroes, strength in the face of adversity, and athleticism; sort of halfway between Hercules and Chiron.

Then and only then do Percy and Apollo finally get their act together, confessing to each other how much they care for the other and how much they don't want this to be fake any longer.

History proceeds apace - albeit with Persē being a second immortal trainer of heroes.

24 years after their arrival in the past, 16 years after Percy's ascension, The Trojan War begins. Despite their best efforts, there's only so much they can do - war is war and gods are gods. They are able to stop some of the worst excesses on both sides, but in the end Apollo still sends the plague that causes Agamemnon to take Briseis for his own, which caused Achilles' departure from the field, Patroclus' death, &c - not because Apollo was trying to maintain the timeline, but because in the instant he sent it he was angry and reverted to his old ways.

Troy falls...

...but when Zeus tries to use this as an excuse to ban gods from interacting with their demigod children, Apollo is able to say that's a bit extreme isn't it? with enough backing from the rest of the council that Zeus is forced to amend his ruling so that the gods are only allowed to freely visit their children on the "cross quarter days" that fall between each solstice and equinox (1 February, 1 May, 1 August, and 1 November).

This changes everything and nothing.

Time continues its inevitable march. Greece has its golden age before being conquered by Rome, which splits apart under its own weight and forms several smaller countries, which eventually spread their cultures around the world...

Apollo and Percy are there for it all. Persē is a minor figure in mythology, but never forgotten. He is ever-present in Apollo's temples - though the Church will later try to rewrite their myth so that they were merely sworn fighting partners, rather than lovers who eventually had a quite lovely wedding on Olympus (and then, at Poseidon's insistence, an even bigger ceremony on Atlantis). Percy takes over day-to-day operations of CHB from practically the moment the Trojan War ends.

...and so Persē is there the day Sally Jackson tries to get her son to camp, and is able to intervene when the Minotaur attacks on their border. He's able to meet her and her young son, Perseus ("Mom named me after you and the guy that killed Medusa since you're the only two heroes to have happy endings!"), and guide him through the trials that come with being a child of prophecy.

One day that Percy will hand Luke - who was never happy with the limited attention the gods were allowed to give their children - a cursed dagger so that Kronos can be defeated. That child will be offered godhood, turn it down, and go on to have a happy life with his eventual wife, Annabeth. He will never have his memories erased and be sent to Camp Jupiter. Gaia will not rise until long after that Percy's grandchildren are dead, and Zeus will not be quite so bullheaded when the proof of it is brought before him. That Second Gigantomachy is swift, well-coordinated, and fought without another Greek/Roman war brewing in the background.

And when they finally arrive at the day Apollo and Percy were originally sent back in time, Percy admits that while he is happy some version of him was better prepared for the war he was asked to fight in and allowed his peace afterward, he would change nothing about his own life, for it brought him to Apollo. The sunrise the next morning - on the first morning of the rest of their lives - is particularly spectacular.

Bonuses include:

Gaslighting Poseidon into believing that he's met Percy before the first time they're introduced. ("What do you mean you don't remember me, Father? You were present when I came of age! You gifted me this trident! Have I displeased you in some way?") It's an absolute masterclass that eventually manages to convince Poseidon that, yes, of course he knows Percy - and, maybe, he should check in on all his other demigod children to make sure he's not missed someone. (Two. He lost track of two of the others. Maybe he should be more careful about siring children in the future.) Apollo practically has to stuff his fist in his mouth to keep from laughing.

As much historical accuracy as can be crammed into the Percy trying to make sense of Ancient Greece chapters as possible. Think Of a Linear Circle - Part III by flamethrower levels of historical research. As much as can be shoehorned in without bogging down the plot.

Percy and Dionysus bonding over their mutual dislike of Theseus, though Percy generally gets along with his other half-siblings, especially the ones who come to camp young enough to keep from getting big heads over being the children of Poseidon.

Though Percy adores all the children in Cabin 7 (most of whom are born via blessing this time around), he and Apollo have at least one child of their own - maybe a demigod born before Percy's ascension to sell their fake relationship? Maybe a minor god who's later attributed a different parentage by mortals? Dealer's choice on details.

It never being made clear who, or what, or how, Percy and Apollo were sent into the past. All of Percy's oddities are attributed to him being foreign or formerly mortal, all of Apollo's to the fact that he's in love with someone who didn't die before their first anniversary, and no one ever guesses time travel is responsible for their eccentricities. Or that time travel was ever an option.

And that's all I have. As always, feel free to adopt, just link back if you ever decide to do anything with it.

More PJO Ideas | More Terrible Fic Ideas

[strandnreyes]

(hi hello this is maddie <3) Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers! Spread the self-love 💞

hi!! thanks maddie <3

your first string

TK knows this season is going to be different from the minute he steps onto the court the first day of practice; he can feel the buzz in the air of the Moody Center as the team warms up.

Most obviously, they’re all hungry for a title after being knocked out of the Elite Eight last season, not that TK was around to witness it. But he was there for the buzzer beater that lost them the championship game the year prior, and that’s reason enough for him to crave redemption.

The other main factors responsible for filling the room with energy are the new additions to their roster. Primarily, Carlos Reyes.

TK hasn’t been able to go anywhere this semester without hearing about how Carlos transferred schools after a family emergency to be closer to home, or even more so, seeing him around campus—the library, TK’s favorite coffee shop, his 8 am class every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Carlos is inescapable.

come what may, I’ll still stay

Nearly one year into their marriage and TK finds that life looks a little different these days with Carlos working as a detective. He knows change happens, but when the missed dinners start to pile up and the change begins to feel like too much change, TK struggles with how to remind Carlos that life exists beyond his badge.

wherever you stray, I follow series (cheating a little)

the vampire universe

sacred new beginnings

After five years of marriage, TK and Carlos have been through a lot together, but change is never something that stays away for too long. As they approach a new phase of their lives—searching for a new home—they continue to navigate many other changing aspects of their relationship—family drama, work dynamics, sex, and discussions of their future.

With each twist and turn, they work through it as they always do. Together.

Or, the marriage fic.

to live for the hope of it all

“We were between Honduras and the tip of Mexico when we went down.” He draws an X in the dirt. The area of the ocean that Carlos gestures to with his stick seems so miniscule, but TK knows it’s likely thousands of square miles. “We may have gotten slightly off course when we lost control, but yeah,” he slides his foot over the picture, effectively wiping it away. “It’s a start.”

His eyes are stormy and his brow is furrowed. TK wants to smooth it out with his thumb, he wants to wash the dirt off his neck and ask him why he looks like he’s holding the weight of the world on his shoulders, but all he can do is nod and hope the rescue team can find them as easily as the map made it seem.

[infiniteko]

I have been practicing spirituality so hard, why doesn’t it work for me?

Reader: I have tried to follow your suggestion to separate myself from the storyline so that I can become a big background presence to observe whatever is going on. However, it’s getting harder and harder because I become less focusing on what I am doing, and I become less comfortable to talk to people, and I become more forgetful. What is wrong with my method?

BeingIs: You missed the subtleties that I pointed out. I never suggested that you separate yourself from the seemingly storyline. The seemingly storyline is energetic patterns of your SELF. How can you separate SELF from SELF? It’s impossible. There is no way out from SELF because all energetic patterns as interpreted by the Mind as a certain life story is none other than SELF.

Can you separate yourself from your dream? You cannot. Because the effect of dreaming is none other than SELF. Your Mind imagines that there existing a subject overlooking object. The assumed subject versus object relationship is an illusion. All experiential patterns are SELF, no matter how they appears to be. Experiential patterns may seem like “other people”, but it’s not actually other people, it’s SELF. You may imagine that the images of “other people” must look and feel like yourself to be SELF.

No, the images of “other people” can still appear as if they are other people without actually becoming other people. It does not matter how experiential patterns may seem and may feel, all experiential patterns are none other than SELF. There is no analysis needed to see this fact, all is unconditionally SELF. If you need analysis to reach a conclusion, this is not direct knowing. Direct knowing requires no analysis. You don’t need to extract yourself out or merge yourself into experience. All experience is already SELF by default regardless of how they seem and feel.

Do not be fooled by how they seem and how they feel. Since you are trying to extract an imaginary self out of experience, such illusion causes your loss of functionality in life. There is not a self that can be extracted out or merge into. All is already SELF by default. You are free to talk with other people because “talking” is SELF and “other people” is the same SELF. Please don’t fool yourself by thinking that the action of “talking” is coming from a personal “you”. You are free to focus on a task because “focusing” is not actually done by a personal “you”.

The effect of focusing is the energetic effect of SELF. And the so-called “task” is not actually a task as you think it to be, but the energetic effect of SELF. The entire logic of “I am focusing on a task” is the Mind’s imagination. There is nothing special for you to do, just know directly that all is SELF and all is already perfect.

[mechawolfie]

dad is here and the ache of Wishing I Had A Relationship With My Dad returns

[little-mouse-adventures]

Currently thinking about Artemis's will in the code at the bottom of TLG and how it really kinda shows how strained his relationship with his dad still is. Everyone else gets something they're interested in or that Arty thinks they'd like (sound system for Juliet, frozen chicken for Mulch, ethical investments for his mother, etc) and yet for his father he leaves only bearer bonds, despite Artemis I trying to move away from a money-focused enterprise and lifestyle as of TEC. Not to mention it's Butler who would know how to disengage all the booby traps protecting said bearer bonds, further highlighting the difference in trust & familiarity Artemis has with everyone but his father.

[myreia]

— vi. the last

They stay. They go. Ebbs and flows, as certain as the tide that will take his ship to sea. Their responsibilities take them in different directions. This is the way it has always been, and in truth, they prefer it. Independent to a fault, wanderers in answer to different calls. But the time apart makes the time together all the more sweeter. Goodbye for now does not mean goodbye forever.   Till next we meet.

[lionblaze03-2]

mousefur and longtail are both asexual aromantic in some sort of qpr relationship with one another. Do you get it do you see my vision

[alisaint]

she lives in my head rent free all utilities paid but that's okay because i am a generous soul and it's of no expense to me i have the money it's fine. no this isn't causing me any kind of serious psychic or spiritual damage bro why do you ask

[andsotheuniverseended]

Orimar Vale sir if you happen to be free any night this week i would love to discuss sensory overload and the pursuit of escaping the limits of humanity to become a story that will never die with you

[ox1-lovesick]

hi

[wife]

reading about peoples experiences with childhood loneliness on reddit is like wrow... i'm a special girl i see

[creative-chaos-apparently]

Hello all you NATM people it is the lovely hour of 4:30 AM for me.

Anyway if you have the guts, go read “My heart will stop in joy” by @night-at-the-musian. I am permanently changed and altered by my reading of this fanfiction and I am beginning to feel bad about how maybe my fanfics affect other people.

Im gonna curl up in a ball for a couple months and try to remember how to be a human being

I have been awake 24 hours straight on two hours of sleep

[kingofdinosaurs]

sorry thinking about minazuki again.

me and the guy who lives in my brain and was probably born from my deep seated repressed understanding that my dad was abusing me and the survival instincts i had beaten out of me in order to become a better human weapon. there to protect me because i can't understand how to protect myself. who is also technically a potential harbinger of the doom of all mankind if he ever really got going but he would never do that to me specifically (FUCK THE REST OF YOU)

vs [deeper voice that's still clearly from the same vocal cords but with a completely different cadence and intonation] me and the mentally ill traumatized human i awakened within who i do my best to protect and care for with my limited understanding of how to do so. who can and has hurt me worse than anyone, to the point that my ingame title references that injury. but to hurt me is to hurt himself, and i would still do anything for him. so no matter what, i shoulder any burden i can manage for him. even to a fault. even to a breaking point.

we rely on each other. two halves of a whole. and yet we cannot admit that we share a deeper bond than many could imagine. it didn't even come to mind. someone else had to point it out. we meant the world to each other while never knowing how to articulate it.

and our persona who is a weird owl.

[azol-otl]

Random Jason Hijinks I either wish would happen someday or find amusing to think about.

Rose and Jason break Eddie out of hell and steal his soul back from Neron. Jaime is dragged along by Rose because he and Eddie were “friends a few reboots ago”. Jason asked Roy who sent him Connor who is suffering™.

Pre-Red Hood Jason and Pre-Green Arrow Connor first meet up back when Jason was part of the All-Caste hunting a demon. It’s a one-shot adventure and the things you have to know are:  

a) this is before Jason’s growth spurt so he’s over a head shorter than Connor.

b) Connor isn’t a cape so excuse him for not understanding demons and fucking up hilariously a few times.

c) When Jason tries to kill the demon who is possessing the human, he and Connor fight about it. The fight ends when the demon explodes out of the person like the Pus of Man from Dark Souls 3.

d) Talia is the one who finds and picks up Jason from the adventure (Connor thinks she’s his mom and Jason just didn’t inherit the melanin) and is also the one who gives Connor contact information for Jason because she wants him to have some sort of friend.

e) They never actually learned the other’s name so anytime they’d hear about Red Hood or Green Arrow they literally don’t know it’s that guy they met as teenagers.

Jason decides to actually dust off his mystic training when Dick walks in and Jason gets hit with so many bad vibes he’s genuinely worried something is wrong with Dick.  

Jason: “Did they not fix the Brother Blood mind control thing fully? Did Raven miss something? Isn’t Dick friends with a million people? How have they all missed this????”

It ends with bringing Danny Chase back to life and the only person remotely happy about it is Jason and even that’s a stretch.

Rose, why are you part of the Wild Hunt?!!!

What do you mean Biz got taken by the fae?!

Roy, why is this werewolf saying he’s your husband?!

Eddie, why didn’t you tell me you were a prince of hell? What do you mean that one of Trigon’s sons is buried in Gotham?!!! No wait, you still haven’t told me how you’re a prince of hell!

Jason and Talia's road trip where Jason comes to the uncomfortable realization that he views Talia as a mother/aunt figure.

Bonus Artemis suffering Jason’s Mom Has it Going On.

Jason gets a new dog named Ellie and he loves her and Dog very much. What do you mean she’s a Blue Lantern!?

Ellie is short for Elpis and she’s absolutely Hope Corgi.

Roy finds out that he has a whole-ass checking account under one of his aliases that he never knew about. Turns out Jason created it for him years ago and Roy’s actually under W.E.  employed as an independent contractor and he’s been making 6 figures for years because Jason never bothered telling anyone that he still owns Wayne R&D.

Jason slowly but surely claims Park Row and the surrounding areas as his territory. It has the unforeseen consequence of magical folk moving into the neighborhood because Gotham is a nightmare to live in normally, Magic Gotham is even worse and the only people who can survive are big hitters like Blood, Zatanna, and Ivy or small fries like the kitchen witch near Leslie’s. Welcome to the big leagues, Jason.

Jason keeps getting mistaken for Jason Blood and it is annoying. One day some demon hunters threw something at Jason and did anyone know Jason used to be in heaven because he sure didn’t and these angel wings are a fucking nightmare.

Rose busts a gut laughing because she somehow became friends with the least demon-y demon Eddie and Jason as an angel.

Jason, Ivy, Sideways, and Impulse (Impulse voice: “Why am I even here?”) vs the Madness Wavelength in Arkham.

Jason kills Joker and finds out that he cannot. Not as in “He doesn’t die” or “There will be a new one” but a secret third option, “The universe literally resets the day every time he’s killed.” Instead of being a tragedy, it becomes a comedy as killing Joker slowly becomes Jason’s go-to when shit goes wrong/killing him is good stress relief. Stephanie discovers what happens because she’s had to write the same essay nine times once. Instead of being horrified they (and then Helena, Tim, Duke, etc.) make killing Joker a gag. The only ones not allowed to kill the Joker are Dick and Bruce because then the universe decides it’s the bad timeline instead of just resetting again.

Tim: *drops his latte on a hot guy and then embarrasses himself in public trying to apologize and becomes a meme.*

Tim: I guess I have to kill Joker now.

Jason and Kory remeeting and wow it’s really awkward that we only got close because of a universe meddler and then you dipped and never contacted me again even though I was a hundred percent serious that you were one of my first friends and are very important to me.

Oh no. Not the talking. Not communication! Kory take mercy on me and just drop me like a bad memory don’t have us open a dialogue where we reconcile all of the bullshit that happened to us and the fact that we did genuinely get close at very low points in our lives and be willing to try and be friends again!

Give! Kory! All! The! Friends! She doesn’t care if you think it’s a bad idea, it's her life!

Gotham Vigilante Tabletop Club (GVTC) featuring Jason, Tim, Stephanie, Duke, Helena, and Harper. They each get a turn as dm and every one of them brings in a different game.

Why is Damian’s friend (Colin) asking me for love advice? I’m a gay disaster ask anyone else please. ??? I guess I can try to help??? Who’s your crush?

It’s Lian and Jason regrets agreeing to help because Roy is going to murder him.

Countdown 2 Electric Boogaloo. Except for this time they were all shoved into the dimension separately and by separate events and there is no danger. It is just a multiversal road trip with the people who vexed you greatly but are slightly grown up now.

Bonus scene includes Jason’s gleeful face when he realizes he understands what all of those words Donna keeps muttering under her breath mean because Artemis was a bro and taught him Themysciran Greek.