#im not his son. the thought makes me feel hollow

[mechawolfie]

dad is here and the ache of Wishing I Had A Relationship With My Dad returns

[chrissdollie]

I have a request if you are interested? :)

A teen!dad jess. He has a best friend from New York (she can have a name or it can be Y/N, you can choose) (they are endgame, jess never had feelings for Rory but she has feelings for Jess, it won't go anywhere) Jess and his best friend have a kid, they co-parent (whether they are dating already or in the future is up to you) Jess gets sent to Stars Hallow, she ends up moving to stars Hallow to, to be close to Jess and so their kid can be with him too (she is emancipated, plus Jess knows she's coming because they keep in contact) if anyone reading this would like to turn this into an actual story, I'm totally down for reading it :) if you choose this request, I look forward to reading it. Thank you!!

hi noonie!! this is my first requests omg wowowow i think this is a great idea! im sorry if its kinda sloppy and not how u wanted! but i hope u enjoyy ! wc: 1.7k also i saw how you said that jess knew she was coming, but whats more fun than a suprise? ;) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As your best friend grabbed his bag and walked towards you and your one-year-old son, you forced yourself to keep your composure. You didn't know how you were going to okay without him. You'll still see him when he comes back to visit for holidays and such, but it won't be the same. You didn't want Jess to leave and neither did he, but he had no choice. He walked over to you and S/N. Reaching out for his father, S/N cooed and Jess took him from you. Jess held him preciously like it would be the last time. "Be good for your mom kid." He kissed his head.

He put down S/N into his crib before walking over to you and grabbed both of your hands. "I'm going to call you twice a day. Morning and night, okay? If there's anything you need, I'm there for you." He explained clearly. You nodded your head as you chewed on your lip, unable to form words. You wrapped your arms around his neck in a tight hug. Jess Mariano was your best friend. Having S/N was an accident, but you and Jess both believed that everything happens for a reason, so you kept him. And neither of you regret it. Your relationship is a little odd, but you love him nonetheless. You pulled away and kissed his cheek. "You'll be okay." You whispered, wiping a tear from your cheek. "And so will you, Y/N. You're the strongest person I know." You smiled softly at his words and gave him a picture of the three of you. He grinned and held it tightly. "Don't miss your bus, buddy." You joked. He ruffled your hair and waved goodbye.

A year later, you still feel the same as you did before. You know, the same day the two of you created a child, the same day you gave birth, and the same day he left. And you were panicking. "Oh, S/N, I'm so excited!" You jumped around making S/N giggle. He bounced along with you. "But I'm nervous too. What if he found someone else?" Then you gasped. "What if he cut all of his hair off?" You exaggerated just to see S/N's goofy smile. "This isn't about me though. This is all for you!" You tickled him (ugh, he's so darn cute). You grabbed your luggage, held S/N on your hip, and left the apartment. Stars Hollow was a cute name, you had to admit. You were thrilled to live in a small town! When you arrived, you stepped off the bus and looked around. Just as you imagined, it looked great! But maybe you should’ve told Jess you decided to be spontaneous and move to Connecticut. On the other hand, Jess could be on the verge of dying from boredom, so a surprise is the perfect thing to cheer him up.

“Thoughts, S/N?” You asked, clenching your hand into a fist as a pretend mic to his mouth. Your adorable son stared at you with his gorgeous eyes. Damn he looks just like his mother. Kidding, he’s an exact replica of Jess. Anywho, you accepted his answer and began to explore.

45 minutes later, you realized that you didn’t plan this out well enough like you thought. Even after talking to Jess everyday on the phone for an entire year, you didn’t know where exactly he was located. Fortunately, you took notice that people often went into a cute little diner called “William’s Hardware Store”, so you followed the crowd into the diner a little bit confused because this didn’t look like a hardware store. You walked in and almost immediately, people started turning to look at you. But atleast S/N enjoyed the attention.

You cleared your throat awkwardly and walked over to the stools at the counter and sat next to a girl around your age. You placed S/N in your lap and took in your surroundings. The girl you were sat next to turned around and gave you a bright grin. “Hi! You’re the new girl, aren’t you?” Her voice was sweet like candy (in the best way possible). “That I am! I’m Y/N. And this dude here is S/N.” You grabbed his hand making him give a little wave. She giggled. “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Y/N. And you too, S/N.” She tickled his belly quickly and perked up to you. “I’m Rory!”

You looked to where a boy was coming out of a hidden room and THERE HE WAS IRJAHDJWHS

Thank goodness he didn’t cut all of his hair off. You suddenly felt butterflies in your stomach, which you hated. Rory turned to face where you were looking and scoffed. But he was right out the door as quickly as he came. “Not the best of friends?” You asked, jokingly. “Jess? It's.. kind of weird right now. But yeah, no.” She informed you. You nodded. Weird? Like romantic weird?

“Hey, what can I get you?”

You turned away from Rory and looked in front of you. This looks EXACTLY like who Jess explained to be his uncle, Luke. You remember seeing a sign saying “Luke’s” bellow the hardware store sign. Backwards baseball cap, plaid shirt, scruffy facial hair, this must be him. “This is Luke, Y/N. Luke, Y/N just moved here from.. where?” Rory introduced and then turned to you. “New York.” You replied. “Oh, welcome. What part? My nephew Jess is from New York also.” Luke smiled. “Same as him.” You responded. Rory and Luke looked confused and you felt awkward again. Not the right choice of words.

That was until Luke’s face changed from “what is she talking about?” to “ohhh THAT Y/N!” You're glad you didn't have to explain.

“Y/N! It’s great to meet you! How are you? Is this S/N?” Luke looked below to see S/N’s cute lil chubby face. “Yup, this is him!” You held S/N up higher so Luke could see him better. “Wait you know Jess?” Rory asked. “Father of my kid. It wasn’t planned, but things happen, you know? Anyway, he’s my best friend. We’ve know each other since childhood, actually.” You explained. “Wow, this is amazing! So- so you live here now?” Before you could answer Luke, he rushed up and walked to a phone, dialing a number. “I'm gonna get him to come back right now, don't worry."

“Oh, uh. Well sure, I suppose.” You muttered. “Um, well I have to go home to my mom, but it was great meeting you! See you around!” Rory waved goodbye and left. You mentally smacked yourself on the forehead. You were never good at first impressions, EVER. Just a few seconds after Rory left, the door opened again to reveal a sweaty Jess with a panicked expression. “Where’s the fire? Why’s everyone so calm?” He ran over to Luke. “Here, lemme show you.” Luke placed his hand on Jess’ shoulder and guided him to your seat. You fixed your hair as quickly as possible.

Jess stood and stared. “Wh-What are you doing here?” He brightly smiled. He looked down at S/N, who stared into his eyes. He took him from you and rocked him slowly. “Hey, kid.” Jess kissed S/N’s head. “Hi, Jess.” You spoke shyly.

He then turned his attention back to you. “Hey,” He gazed. You stood up quickly and wrapped your arms around him. Luke took S/N from Jess so he could hug you back fully. “I can’t believe you’re here.” He whispered in your neck. “I missed you.” You told him, pulling away. Although Jess always had trouble expressing his feelings into words, it was a little tense when he didn’t respond back to you.

Luke awkwardly turned to you. “Sorry, Y/N, I gotta get back to work.” He apologized, giving S/N back to you. “It was nice meeting you.” You smiled. He winked and walked back to the kitchen.

"Sooo, how have you been?" You asked, trying to start a conversation while bouncing S/N in your lap. "I've been alright." He put his hands in his pockets and began to speak when a blond chick wrapped her arms around him. "Hey. Where were you? I thought we were gonna go to my place." She prodded. She then turned to face you. "Aw, cute baby."

Of course he had a girlfriend. He was always cool and popular in school, so why wouldn't he be here? You were terribly mistaken to think otherwise. But now you felt a weird pit in your stomach. This was a bad move. You shouldn't have come here. But no, your son needs his father. So, you decide to be brave for S/N.

"Can we do this later?" He mumbled to her. "So you expect me to be okay with this? Ugh, what's the matter with you?" She stormed out of the diner before Jess could respond (not that he wanted to). "Trouble in paradise?" You questioned wholeheartedly. Although you were disappointed, you weren't going let this get in the way of your friendship. He scoffed. "Shane is definitely not my paradise. Look," He got serious for a moment and sat down on a stool next to you. "I'm happy you're here. Really, I am! But you came at a bad time." He told you. "Love triangle?" You joked, thinking back to how Rory said things were weird between them two. "How'd you know?" Jess' eyebrows furrowed. Oh. "Lucky guess." You shrugged. Well, this can't get any better can it? "It was nice seeing you. I should go start unpacking though." You stood up and switched S/N to your other hip. "Listen, let me get things sorted out and I promise I will be with you." He grabbed your hand. "Sorted out? Jess, you shouldn't feel forced to be with me. It's okay, I promise." You tried to reason with him. Why did he make it seem like he had no other option but you? Clearly he has choices.

"No, no. I need to be with you. Remember a few weeks ago when I told you I was gonna go back home?" He asked. You nodded. "That's because I wanted to be with you and my son. But you stopped me and I listened. So, now you're here and I'm gonna be the best damn father I can, alright?" He let go of your hand and ran behind the curtain. All of a sudden, S/N began to cry.

a/n: i'm gonna do a part two dont worryy! im just tired rn but i will try and draft something later tonight and maybe post it tmr xx this was a little hard for me to write since jess would be more mature as a father (atleast i think so) and he wasnt alone like in the show yk? but i had fun nonetheless :)

[puppysdog]

im gonna be honest ive been listening to this all day

lyrics under the cut

Intro: Khantrast & DizzyEight, Both]

Yeah, yeah, damn

We did it again

We did it again

We did it again (We did it-, nah)

We did it again

We did it again

Me and my twin, we did it again

[Verse 1: Geto (Khantrast)]

Look, a bro want beef with a pro by all means, we can spark heat with a dome

Been told y'all stench like apes, turn this zoo to a homicide scene with the folks

No peace, we do the most, y'all fiends get beat by the priest get disposed

Watch your mouth, curse at me, Imma leave you knocked out while you sleep with the ghosts

Geto, devil

They dead, when it's curse, I let room

Blood red, got an army on get go

Neck fold back, now they looking like a pretzel

One hit make 'em think God switch up the show

Like I'm writing down names in the Death Note

Top two, but I feel number one

If they ask by the rest, I point down death row, uh

Who could compete with me? All opposition, I finish 'em easily, gang full of deities

Soon as they summoned, y'all best get to running, or you might end up on an EMT

You could catch me with the demons, be watch how this sorcerer outplay the game like it's DND

Y'all think I'm playing? I'm box with the best, only one living soul on this planet that equal me, woo

Who wanna clash? Ready to box, now get sneak attacked, stupid

You could get smacked, pop out the shadows, I'm smoking your pack, stupid

He want the hands, now he getting jumped, my gang on his ass, stupid

You pull up on me, I bust out the Dragon and leave him outclassed, stupid

He want the back and forth

My armada leave his ass in fourths

Kamikaze what you have in store

If you want it with me, we could scrap some more

Pack up and dash fast forward

Know he gon' get harassed and deformed

If we combat it, we bring havoc storms

Had rapping with the bro pass the torch

[Verse 2: Gojo (DizzyEight)]

Hold up, he really thought I was dead? (Stupid)

You should've went for the head

Finger snap, and it rip him to shreds

Night night, then we put him to bed, baow

Wait, I'm not the one, dummy

He really thought that he won

The battle was over before it begun

Put him down, then I father his son

Yeah, tryna beat Gojo, you gon' need more than a gun

You'll get clapped like Todo, fold bro, when I pull up, you should know that he done

Leaving 'em stunned, this what you want, shoulda told him that I do this for fun

Your block gets spun, why would I run? You see Toji, I see a hole in one

We both killers, only difference between us is that I can finish the job

And when a lame tried to have me slain by letting it bang, I walked out alive

Thought I was limited, limitless, they could be ten of him, that's just more bodies to drop

Thought he was menacing? Ignorant - I am the synonym, play with the gang, and you gaining a plot

Took an L once, now it's never again

Now I'm up, and I'll never descend

Slide up on him when he least expect it

Then it's hollow purple and his spirit ascend

I'm him, you can't win

Took a chance, now he out on a limb

What I mean is he out of a limb

Blinded by hate, now his light getting dimmed

This was a pointless fight

Orphaned your kid just to die over spite

I'm guessing he hated his life

So I packed him and sent straight to his wife

I was wronged, so I'm making it right

Came for my head, and they came with the price

You put my twin in your sights

Now when I see you, it's fatal on sight

[quietbluejay]

A Thousand Sons 2

Is this disjointed? Yes. Am I going to organize it into something more coherent? No.

I'm remembering all the Ultramarines in Know No Fear being completely shooketh at the thought of Astartes killing Astartes meanwhile Magnus is like "I'm going to kill you" to the Space Wolf captain dude

the framing around Othere's introduction is kind of romance novel and given what I've been spoiled on that makes me uncomfortable.

‘I know well your name, Ahzek Ahriman,’ said Wyrdmake, with a feral grin, ‘for I have long desired to meet you.’

This is a good way to end a chapter, though.

the bulked musculature of his smooth torso

now my mental image of Ahriman's torso is of a cylinder

also lol, Magnus calls the SW captain a whelp this is after: -telling him to take off his mask because he wants to see a mans face before he kills him -threatening to destroy all their ships in orbit

Magnus is not a diplomat, to put it mildly

Magnus is a great example of how intelligence is not wisdom

Honestly the Space Wolves are currently coming off the better in this conflict.

-i feel like removing the ability for your soldiers to panic would be far more useful than removing the ability to fear -how on earth did the TS manage to conquer any planets on their own i must ask -current theory Magnus went and did Aang's marble trick in front of the planetary leaders -McNeill is once again Gross when women show up on page, i will spare the exact quote -also this whole book is like...kind of horny is a plausible deniability way?? i don't know how to describe it. It's really not enhancing the reading experience -Magnus received one (1) sympathetic moment, his main redeeming quality is that he does in fact care about the TS and they were the reason he decided to go deeper into the Warp, to save them -greasy tentacles. okay. moving along. the snake: bro im a daemon

‘Daemon is a meaningless word, a name to give power to fear.’ ‘I know, isn’t it wonderful?’ smiled the serpent, coiling around Magnus’s legs and slithering up his body. Magnus did not fear the serpent. He could destroy it without effort.

you know im kind of getting tired of slithering things no more slithering things grabbing people and wrapping around them to drag them off into the depths society has moved beyond the need for slithering things

This book has just been a slog tbh.

Timeskipt and...ITS A BIRD WORLD I LOVE IT except for the fact that they're, you know, conquering it ;-;

As well as this lost strand of humanity, Heliosa was a world that belonged to the creatures of the air. The skies were alive with flocks of every description, from tiny, insect-sized creatures that fed on guano to rabid pterosaurs that hunted from lairs in hollowed-out peaks. More than one Imperial craft had been lost to bird strikes before weapon systems were modified to provide continuous clearance fire.

me @ the birds: you're doing amazing sweetie

‘What happens here after we leave is not our concern.’ Ahriman shook his head. ‘But it should be,’ he said. ‘Guilliman has the way of it. The worlds his Legion wins venerate his name and are said to be utopias. Their inhabitants work tirelessly for the good of the Imperium as its most loyal subjects. The people of these worlds will be reluctant citizens of the Imperium at best, rebels-in-waiting at worst.’ ‘Then we will return and show them what happens to oathbreakers,’ snarled Wyrdmake.

hey. Ohthere. Oaths given under duress aren't valid.

current evaluation of Leman Russ: I don't like him either, but he's not quite as obnoxious as Magnus yet

[foileadeux]

Hope you okay with more questions. What are your thoughts on how Hollow knight feels about their family members? Like Little Ghost or Hornet or Pale King or White Lady or the rest of the vessels (who are ded)

yep yep all good! ill admit the questions have been a little overwhelming because ive just never really done this before, but its super fun having a dialogue with you guys!! and its just nice to ramble about hk haha

MAN hollow has a lotta feelings about their family... ive always really liked the idea of little hornet and hollow forming a bond together at her time at the white palace. she'd play games and hide under their cloak, hollow would act disinterested once the retainers passed by but absolutely play along with her when alone. theyre friends! but pk would most likely separate them most of the time as to not distract them from their Pure Vessel Duties, which would upset little hornet and pk would have to deal with her punching her little fists on his leg hollow's thoughts on little ghost hmm.... im sure theres a LOT of regret there for leaving their sibling on that ledge, that regret extending to the rest of the fallen vessels- maybe a sort of survivor's guilt? i wish we'd known as to what exactly made pk choose hollow over their siblings, but im sure the titles placed upon them weigh heavy and feel misplaced considering they do, in fact, have thoughts and feelings LMAO. but other than their shared pain i think they'd be besties, even though they're likely born from the same clutch they definitely have a younger-older sibling dynamic. hollow showing up in ghosts vicinity to just stand there menacingly and then walk away without a word. Typical big sibling behaviour hollow's thoughts on pale king.... ough. im sure theres a lotta conflicting feelings, they definitely loved, idolised and respected him, but there's also the amount of control that pk had exerted over their life that made them feel very distant and isolated, i think this would bring maybe a tinge of resentment towards him, but mostly towards themself for failing their duties. lots and lots of yearning for pk to care for them as their father (coughs at the "please make me your son" in toba the tura). pain.....pain!!! and so, so much repression

[bridgertonbabe]

Hogwarts AU is one of my favourites!! If you get multiple asks from me on this… well Im not sorry 😂😂

I’d love love love to see how they are on Sophie’s first day at work, with Edmund showing her around the Minstry like “this is my daughter in law” and Benedict being the proud boyfriend whilst trying not to worry and the three boys being the same (though Colin being an ass still with Benedict 😂)

Edmund would insist that Sophie stay the night at Aubrey Hollow before her very first day at the Ministry and she takes him up on the offer so she can have someone to walk into work with and thus ease her brewing nerves. Of course with their relationship now out in the open she and Benedict come as a package deal so naturally he joins her back at the family home and they share his old bedroom together.

She is woken up the next morning, not by the alarm she had set, but by a gentle forehead kiss from her boyfriend and when she opens her eyes she's met with a cup of tea he's just made. Sophie's touched not just by Benedict's thoughtfulness but by the fact that he had gotten up far earlier than he prefers to all in the name of making a fuss of her ahead of her first day.

When they get downstairs Violet's gone all out with breakfast to ensure Sophie is well fed and has even gone to the trouble of making her a packed lunch. Even though there's a staff canteen and plenty of local eateries, Violet wanted to prepare a lunch for her just in case she was overwhelmed while finding her bearings within the Ministry; an act which Sophie shows her gratitude by hugging her maternal figure tightly.

While Sophie hadn't wanted to cause such a fuss ahead of her first day, naturally that went against the Bridgertons plans, as she spent most of her breakfast opening a stack of good luck cards and unwrapping a bunch of presents, most of which were stationery that would probably see her through all the way to retirement.

Phillip and Michael arrived shortly before she was set to leave so they could wish her luck in person and see her off along with the rest of the Bridgertons currently residing in Aubrey Hollow. Sophie couldn't help but feel it was all slightly over the top as one by one she hugged everyone gathered but nevertheless it meant the world to her to know just how loved she was by them all. After a departing kiss from Benedict (and ignoring the disgruntled look on Colin's face as he watched) she stepped foot into the fireplace and seconds later found herself in the Atrium of the Ministry of Magic. Edmund then showed her to her office but since they had arrived well over thirty minutes before her department would begin their daily operations, she was marched about the Ministry by the Bridgerton patriarch and proudly introduced to practically every last person who worked there as his daughter-in-law. (She would attempt to correct Edmund after the first couple of introductions and say she was his son's girlfriend, only for Edmund to refer to her as his daughter-in-law-to-be and before Sophie could object he'd snort that it was a given and Sophie simply accepted defeat.)

After a successful first morning Edmund swings by to show her the canteen and also introduce her to the few Ministry employees they hadn't met earlier on in the day. She spends her lunch break with Edmund and his colleague Miles Sharma and she is kept entertained as the two men eagerly discuss their favourite topic; Muggle inventions. She answers all of their questions and is then amazed when Miles points out that the light-up skechers she bought for Edmund several years ago for Christmas are what all the pureblood wizards wear at the Ministry after Edmund wore them to work and set the trend.

At the end of the day Sophie is once again picked up from her office by Edmund and the pair return to Aubrey Hollow together where Violet, Benedict, and the rest of the Bridgertons are keenly awaiting to hear all about Sophie's first day. She's barely opened her mouth to respond when Edmund begins proudly boasting about her and how well liked she already is and how her head of department praised her work ethic. Edmund's lauding continues into the roast dinner Violet's prepared specially and despite the slight embarrassment she feels by the extents Edmund is going to in hyping her up, she cherishes his unconditional pride of her dearly because while she might not be one of his daughters, he's never treated her anything less than being one of his own and for that she's eternally grateful for having Edmund Bridgerton in her life.

[richardsphere]

Leverage Redemption Log: The Bucket Job

Title makes me think "bucket list"? either that or Keeping Up Appearances? (had to google "that show with the bucket woman" to remember the name) --- bells are playing and there is a giant semi-hollow pipe-structure of a snowman outside the building we're in. Its Christmas Special Time.

Librarian is giving the children some classic reading recomendations based on his knowledge of their likes (the girl likes pirates, which is a nice little gender-stereotype breaking to sneak in there without drawing attention to the subversion. Love it when shows feel confident doing that without the need to detract by boasting about it.) Young Man used to get Sherlock Holmes.

And the librarian is having a heart-attack... --- Harry is calling his daughter. His daughter doesnt want to spend the holiday with him because Mom is going on vacation to some resort (I think Aspen is a resort town in the states?) Ok either he has a son as well as a daughter, i am misremembering him as having a daughter, The daughter might be trans, or Nick is short for Nikita/vero-Nic-a, or Nick is more gender-neutral as a name then i thought (wouldnt be the first time, i went years thinking Sam was exclusively a female name because the only "sam" i ever heard of was from Totaly Spies). I am not sure which is the case. (im gonna place money on its a shortened-nickname though) Ok Sophie confirms its a daughter.

Elliot has been cooking, Parker is taking the long-distance part of Long Distance Relationship a bit hard around the holidays.

Knock on the door: its Doyledude. He's asking for Elliot by full name (sus). --- Doyledude's gay and his dads a preacher who didn't aprove of "woke" books like Charlie and the chocolate factory. (Yes Christians are that bad. Source: My dad got a chainletter that refered to the antichrist as an "avatar" of satan once and "The last airbender" and the blue smurfs were both insta-banned from the household forever).

--- "I am totally fine with revenge it allows us a range of outcomes the mark deserves". good line.

"Guess theres a lot of maurice's out there" KNEW IT, the moment they named him "blanche" i suspected we were gonna be getting a Maurice Leblanc reference. (of course they'd go for Arsene Lupin in an episode about the importance of libraries)

Harry's "so do I" is a simple joke but it lands well. 8/10.

I think we found todays villain: Its the guy harassing a homeless man for using the library. (fuck that guy) Ok ominous cut of someone taking pictures of Elliot. --- Sophie is walking around the theatre loading 100 checkov's guns at once (confetti cannon, Parker is booking a helicopter, red sportscar, Harry has a cane)

Sophie does a speech about the team needing to remember that this is a good person.

Elliot has gotten some of his old budies to work stuntmen. Parker is asking the very crucial heart-attack related question. Our safeword is Winnebago (google says its a campervan? Honestly, if it werent for the whole "automobiles are deathmachines I dont trust myself with" angle, i'd like one.) --- Librarian dude takes one look at the red sportscar and just thinks "dafuq kinda spy are you?" before stealing a regular car like a sensible person on the run from crooks would.

So, clearly the guy is either a someone bad upbringing who brought himself around, or an actual retired spy himself, who reads those books primarily out of nostalgia.

Ok its misspent youth, also the way he casually tosses the phone out the window. Love this guy. --- Im gonna be honest, while i apreciate the consistency of parker still being the Christmas Monster, the way her characterisation has mellowed out to using store-brand santamugs after she was first introduce as off-the-wall enough to use priceless jewelry as garlands is weird to me.

Breanna carelessly dismisses an attack on their own firewalls and servers. Harry's moustache is bad but the eyepatch is worse. --- Four stars? Comeon man. (good improv)

Actual Goons are here! "take spencer" knew it! no way that Doyledude would know Spencers full name. Mr Blanche has stolen a sportsbike. --- Turns out yeah, he was a former spy. Its RIZ bitch (did we get a name? I dont remember) she's looking for "the ledger" (presumeably a list of secret identities. We're looking for a book kept by a librarian. Its in the library. Probably that book samurai book he's been reading regularly) Ok so this is definitly becoming a recurring thing with the way she first used Elliot to find which guys to hire and is now talking about making him an instructor. Is she the secret person he's been phone-ing that breanna was asking about this whole episode? (i thought it was the Supercop from Arlo) --- Blanche has a gun pointed at our heroes. PTSD in a bottle, cause thats a thing that exists now. Wilson is still holding old job secrets from them? Thats... weird. --- Wait, Elliots dad is alive? But I thought that the episode ending implied otherwise? (Might be me being bad at understanding the subtext of that scene, might be a retcon) --- Mr Blanche has already beaten all the guards in the time it took a drugged out Elliot to break a chair. (Pretend to be the new guy, classic "heavy object in a sock" prison-improv weapon. 8/10, guy knows what he's doing, but is also a bit rusty and forced into improv mode) --- Turns out, he didnt retire because he wanted to retire but because no one would believe the ledger was destroyed. Luckily floppy disks suck at long-term storage.

Harry is talking with his old boss, trying to be the angel on his shoulder while the boss is trying to be the devil on his. (still really odd that we went through the trouble of establishing our heroes broke in to find Harry's ledger of old sins and that we're now going the "Harry wont tell them his old sins" route.) --- Copperhead and Elliot are talking. Copperhead does not want to go out by cancer. (we're faking his death and assigning him to International arent we?) --- Confetticannons are a go-go! (they're meant to simulate pages being shot by guns)

Blanche got disarmed and shot with his own gun. (definitly a death-fake) --- Huh, RIZ-woman doesnt actually kill the guards who fail her objectives. She just blackmails them into following their NDA's. (profesional)

Yup it was in the big samurai book. (obviously) and he's getting the rental.

OK so Hardison sent the library boy. (explains why he knew Spencers name)

Ok So Elliots dad is alive just not around for the holidays ever.

[pussypopstiel]

It’s been a month since he died and it still dosent feel real. One thing im always worried about is that saying “my uncle passed” dosent communicate the severity of the loss. I feel like when you say uncle people assume it’s far enough removed for you to not be affected by it, they don’t see him taking a hand in raising you, him taking you to minigolf courses, him picking you up after school. They don’t see his smile, his warm hugs, his stupid jokes, they don’t smell his cologne. I’m afraid I’m taking up too much space- like I shouldn’t be grieving his loss so hard. His own son seems so put together- not even eighteen and he’s lost his father. What reason do I have to fall apart? On what grounds do I deserve to grieve till my voice breaks? I feel like there’s no time, I don’t have any space to let go, because if I sink into that hole I’m not sure I’ll come out so easily. It’s been a month, it could’ve been yesterday, it dosent feel real, I try to make it less real.

I’ve become more bitter in this month, or maybe a better word is somber. My heart dosent fill as fully as I think it use to, I think I’m trying to imitate what I once felt, trying to hard to be normal. All the while obsessing over the thought of death- cause, when one person in your family dies- you become gravely aware of the fact that someone else in your family will die someday. It dosent matter if it’s two years in the future, ten, fifty, who knows, all I know is that I’m looking into the eyes of the people I love most in this world and my only thought when looking at them is “one of you is next.” A selfish part wishes it was me, the rest of me knows I couldn’t destroy my family like that- just to escape the emotional burden of throaty wails soaking your shoulder.

I’ve told maybe like, two people in my life- and it’s been teachers who prompted the question of “so how was your vacation?” And ofcourse I have to punish their kindness in remembering what I was doing with a somewhat tragic tale. I haven’t told anyone else, no friends. I’m making plans to hang out with people just so I don’t loose them- but it just aches more than usual. I can’t take this seriously, I can’t take anything seriously. I can’t bitch and moan and whine for too long without the fire being stolen from my breath, without the spark of passion fizzling out moments later. I try- but it’s hollow. I feel like you might be able to see a deadness in my eyes if you were to pay attention- but I don’t think most people do. Another part of me just thinks I’m a good actor. I don’t know.

When someone in your family dies, it isn’t just their death. It’s their funeral, it’s the mourning process, it’s mixing with each persons mental health. My dad is spiraling and I live with it, my mom is trying and I live with it, my grandparents hold in their cries and I live with it, my aunts bite their tongue and I live with it. I live with it all, I feel like Im living in his grave, I wish that sickness took all of us- or maybe just me. Maybe I’m being over dramatic.

It’s been a month since you’ve been gone, and nothing is the same, but I’m trying to be normal. This isn’t even a fraction of the thoughts swarming through my head, but it’s honest all the same. I love you

[rt-lots]

Joining in on the Ian and Rammy ask train… 🌂✏️ (and 🍎 specifically for Ian!)

TW for a fair bit of suicide talk!!!

umbrella - i assume this doesnt need an answer for both of them, bcuz they belong 2 the same story. i imagine ian and rammys story being a vidya game, and i guess itd b a psychological horror? which feels like, pretentious to say but the main scaries of the story are how much ians life sucks and he wants 2 die. so... i think itd count. thats all overarching stuff tho... most of ian n rammys time spent together is lightheared, i think. theyre two dudes hanging out and one of them is slowly coming to terms with the fact his suicidal thoughts won. whatever genre that is

pencil - WAHHH it depends a lot of the time... ian and rammy have definitely made a big resurgence in my brain recently (past month) bc im 18 and can post bout em, but also just cuz i love them sooo much and want to chew on them constantly. id say i write abt/draw them pretty frequently tho!! i doodle them on my school work and in notebooks a lot and they have some of the bigger galleries on my toyhouse lawl. i dont write much directly for their universe, but ive typed... many paragraphs to my friends just braindumping the shit i think about them. so, yeah, less often than id like, but theyre up there in my priorities of ocs :3

apple (for ian) - GRAHHHHHHHHHHH u dont know what demons uve unleashed w this. i already twed this post for suicide but im gonna move this part under the cut bc mentioning ians dad specifically ties a lot into the suicide aspect of the story

OKAY SO. ians family consists of his mom, sister, and him. his dad was in the picture when he was a little kid, like early elementary age, but ditched after some time. his relationship with both parents was relatively normal, they definitely couldve done a better job raising him, but they were never intentionally hurtful nor did they scar him at all. (well, correction, his MOM didnt scar him at all)

after ians dad left, though, his side of the family still kept in touch... they gave very flimsy reasonings for his fathers absence, why he couldnt make it to holidays, why he wasnt saying all these things directly, etc. it kept things strained and tense as the family knew things were being kept from them but never got to know why. the last interaction ian ever had w his dads side of the family was on his 18th birthday, where his uncle gifted him a silver handgun with his name carved into the handle. it was a hollow attempt to connect with ian, a display of violent masculinity that ian would later use to try and take his own life.

i dont have it fully figured out what this *means* for ians character, but its something i go insane about. ians only memories of his dad are him doing stereotypical masculine dad things w him, like fishing. maybe he didnt interact w ian ass if he was his child, but if he was his son, and that improper socialization is part of the reason he hates himself- why the gun is what kills him. but... i dunno really. ians social anxiety, addiction, and general collapsing in on himself are cuz of a life time of mental illness that went unchecked until he successfully isolated himself to the point no one *could* care, not just cuz daddy give him gun.

okay! that is NOT what u asked at all but now u know it. hehehe. of course ian and rammys story is a big wip forever so excuse me for any side tangents and/or general plot points w loose ends

but! as for his actual relationships w family (ill include sister since his relationship w mom isnt rlly fleshed out yet):

he and his mom havent spoken in 6 years, nor have he and his sister. he slowly faded out of their lives when he moved away, partly out of a subconscious desire to isolate and partly due to just not having the social confidence or energy to maintain regular communication w his family. his mom is the first person he talks to when he escapes his Puter, and she's his rock in his remaining months of recovery. shes very underdeveloped as a character atm, but what is certain is she tries her hardest to understand her sons struggles and support him, offering to pay for therapy for him. ian loves his mommy lalala

ian and his sister are... dddifferent. ian also had an average relationship w his sister, but shes a lot more upfront with him when it comes to talking about how his 6 year absence effected her than their mom. their mom, while wanting her children to seek help for their respective struggles, doesnt really want to actively talk about those things with them. shes terrified of saying the wrong thing, and it doesnt help that she doesnt even have a clue what *to* say. ians sister, though, isnt afraid to tell him "hey man we fucking missed you. your absence hurt a lot because i didnt have any friends either, and i wish we couldve had eachother. jackass" post main-story they are friendly and hang out. during his time w rammy, ian does talk about his thoughts on his sister before he left, that being that shes a "crazy bitch"... family <3

[justkeepdancing-nemo]

Finding Nemo: How To Land

“I’ve said several times that I’m afraid of falling but not landing. And the difference between falling and landing is that landing means that you can take off again...So, no matter how desperate the situation is, if we choose landing instead of falling, choose not to give up, and just land, we’re ready to fly again.” -Min Yoongi 

**

Summary: Robbie rats out Nemo to Marlin. They go on a road trip to bring Nemo home. Takes place December 14. tw: anxiety, depression

Part One: Failing Nemo Part Two: Something Else 

@robbie-ryeo 

@moon-yeongtae 

@baenxietydad 

Marlin x Robbie Texts

Marlin: [deleted] idk why I’m bother—

Marlin: have you heard from Nam-min

Marlin: Olaf called and said he skipped his exams and isn’t in the dorms. He hasn’t answered me

Marlin: what do you know?

Robbie: Im going to assume this is Marlin.

Robbie: Hello to you too

Robbie: Ugh, he left, though and he told me about it. I know where he is but I was hoping he would be back by now :(

Marlin: And nobody thought to tell me my son disappeared aiya this is great, I bet Tae knows too, eo?

Marlin: Tell me where he is. 

Robbie: he's actually with Tae I could take you there. 

Robbie: to be honest I want to go get him too

Marlin: of course he’s wife Tae, who else would encourage him to run away at least you’re more responsible 🙄

Marlin: So it’s far away, mm 

Robbie: yeah they went camping. Where are you I can come pick you up.

Marlin: In town, near the market

Robbie: I'll be right there

ROBBIE:

Spending the last what felt like 17 hours in the car with Marlin Bae had not been ideal. It wasn’t terrible, but the offhand comments about his driving were…annoying to say the least. Was it really so bad to obey traffic laws? Yes, he understood that perhaps they were in a rush because seeing Nemo and making sure he was okay, those things were important, but if they died on the way to the campsite who did that benefit? 

Anyway, they were here now and Robbie pulled into the nearest parking space and shut off the engine. The guilt bubbled inside of him as he wondered how furious Nemo would be with him when he saw him approaching with his father of all people. Maybe Robbie should’ve kept his mouth shut, but he was worried same as Marlin and well, anxiety did things to a person. Nemo would eventually understand. 

Maybe. 

“I think that’s Tae’s truck over there,” Robbie said, pointing to the familiar farm truck. “They can’t be that far–” 

Robbie abruptly stopped talking as he spotted Nemo. Nemo hadn’t seen him yet, but suddenly this felt like a much worse idea than it had two minutes ago. Nemo was clearly fine and smiling and—fuck he was going to hate Robbie.

MARLIN:

Mu-yeol was angry but it was less about Nemo skipping exams and running away than it was about…Nemo not talking to him. What was all that bullshit about how they were a team and in it together, huh? He let Nemo work instead of him handling it all with a second human job because Nemo insisted. But school, work, his Hollow duties, his social life…maybe something or multiple something’s had to give. He worried about as much. But always thought Nam-min would come to him and talk about it. 

He buried that anger because it was right to feel but wrong to express, and simply said. “Nam-min ah. Did you not think I should know my son is skipping town?”

Because look. The real root of his anger wasn’t that Nam-min must not be taking to school well, because he didn’t expect his son to be his mother. It was a little that Nemo didn’t tell him and a little that Nemo ran off and let Olaf tell him his son was missing. He was an adult and could make these choices. But an “Appa I’m dropping out and need a few days camping with Tae to clear my head” would have sufficed. Maybe he’d try to talk him out of it but he wouldn’t force Nemo to take his exams if he didn’t want to. 

Was he worried he would?

“You really should make your escape plans a little more logically.” He gently, sarcastically chastised him, moving to sit down next to him. 

He looked around at Tae and Robbie and sighed. “Both of you, forget how to speak Korean.”

NEMO: The first few hours into escape, Nemo felt amazing. Weightless. Free. For the first time in moons, there wasn’t something that he was going to have to rush to, or come from, or do. He was just going to curl up with Tae in the back of the truck and become a stranger in the middle of nowhere. He even turned off his phone, after fixing things with Robbie (kind of.)

And things really were good. That first night, they nicked into a gas station for snacks and cheap coffee. They listened to albums and talked and then went for a walk ‘round the campsite, just a short one, before falling asleep in the truck just like they talked about.

When the next morning came though, the pit in Nemo’s stomach had returned. His brain kept buzzing, telling him he was making a huge mistake. He was trying to ignore it though, because what was the alternative?

He and Tae were gonna go make smores– yeah, this early in the morning, why not?-- when Nemo’s choices caught up to him.

He spun around, eyes going wide. At first, his brain shortcircuited. How was Appa–? That didn’t make sense! There was no way he would even know that Nemo was gone!

Then, he saw Robbie lingering over his shoulder and everything clicked into place.

Nemo, at first, ignored Appa entirely as anger twisted his features. “You told him?!” Nemo shouted past Appa, staring at Robbie. “What the fuck, Robbie?!” 

ROBBIE: 

Robbie’s first instinct was to duck behind a tree as Marlin started casually strolling up to Nemo without a care in the world. Nemo wasn’t scary, obviously–Robbie loved him very much and he was so sweet and cute–but also he was a little scary and Robbie was actually sort of…impressed? Terrified? Of what Marlin was doing. It was probably all of the gnawing guilt making Robbie feel this way, honestly, and it was warranted. 

Nemo proved this when he immediately turned toward Robbie with rage in his eyes and yelled. 

And yes, there were definitely situations where Robbie would never betray Nemo like this, but this situation was a little bit different. Nemo was doing a very big thing right now–a very big thing that could potentially have very real consequences or spiral out of had very quickly if Nemo was left alone to overthink things–and telling Marlin was the right thing to do. 

Unfortunately. 

So, when Nemo yelled at him, Robbie didn’t cower or make himself smaller or let himself succumb to his guilt. Instead, with a sad look in his eyes (because hurting Nemo was never good or easy or something he was proud of), he just nodded. “I’m sorry Nemo, but he was so worried about you. We are both worried about you.” 

NEMO: 

Nemo wanted to shove Robbie. 

He wanted to kick Robbie.

He wanted to use his wind to send a blast of damp leaves into his face. 

All these cruel fantasies swirled in him as his fists curled, and the wind picked up and whipped at Nemo’s own hair. But just because Nemo wanted to do these things– punish his boyfriend for ratting him out, for ambushing him, for caring– that didn’t mean that it would make him feel good, or even get him out of the trouble he’d got himself into. No matter the size of the tantrum, he’d been caught.  And so as quickly as the wind picked up, it died, the air stale and flat. 

Nemo’s face flattened out too. He sent a glance toward Tae. “I’ll be back,” he mumbled. 

Then he stalked past Appa. “We can talk over here,” he said. 

He didn’t look at Robbie again. 

MARLIN:

Mu-yeol followed after Nemo, his expression blank save for a concerned furrow of his brow. 

“Nemo,” He began coolly. “Just one question. Can you even explain yourself?”

Or was he well and truly off the deep end, eh?

NEMO: 

As Nemo walked away, he carried his anger with him. It was a hot and comforting thing– bigger and easier to deal with than Nemo’s pain, his guilt, his worry. But it was also as fragile and thin as a balloon. With just one sentence, Appa destroyed it. 

Can you even explain yourself? 

Nemo couldn’t. 

And just like that– his anger collapsed in on itself into all the rest of those things, the things that Nemo had been running from. His face screwed up, and his lip trembled, and he knew that he’d disappointed Appa. He’d wasted the opportunities that Appa worked so hard to give him. He was ungrateful. He was a loser. He was stupid. 

Nemo’s shoulders hunched over, his hands pressing over his face as he began to cry. “N-no,” he admitted. “No, I can’t. I can’t. I can’t.” 

He was talking about way more than just explaining himself. Right now, it felt like Nemo couldn’t do anything. 

MARLIN:

Rightly or perhaps wrongly, he preferred this version of emotional Nemo to the red hot angry Nemo. Angry Nemo lashed out and left little room for getting to the root of an issue. When Nemo broke down like this he was honest and Marlin could actually figure out how to help him. 

“Okay. Can you tell me anything about why you didn’t take your exams? And why didn’t you tell me uni was hard for you, eh?”

NEMO: 

“I’m sorry,” Nemo said miserably, still crying and hunched, hiding his face from view. Appa standing there, talking to him so calmly, only told Nemo that his thoughts were right. Appa was disappointed in him. He had failed, miserably. This was shameful. He was nothing like– 

 “I’m sorry. Y-you worked so hard to help me afford everything and I didn’t want to disappoint you. I wanted to be like her, but I’m not. I’m not smart. I just– it’s so much– I can’t finish anything. I’m always behind everyone. I should be good at it. Everyone else can do it and isn’t like this.” Nemo rubbed his arm over his red, puffy face. “B-but I can’t and I–I dunno why.” 

Why had Finn and Louie been fine? Why was Mim and Hunter and everyone else in his fellowship programme so smart? Why was it just Nemo who couldn’t finish the reading and who was so stressed and who couldn’t sleep and was in so much pain? 

MARLIN:

“Hey, no, none of that. I don’t care if you finish uni or not, I only care that you do what you want to do regarding the issue. I never expected you to be like your eomma.” Mu-yeol said gently. “You wanted to go to uni so I worked to make it happen for you. It’s okay that you’re struggling to adjust but it’s not okay that you’re handling it by just running away.”

He always did this. Sometimes it was maybe the right decision, but this wasn’t one of those sometimes.

Then again, what had Mu-yeol done when faced with his guilt, his shame, and his fear? He fled Korea and came here. They weren’t so different.

“There’s no such thing as a smart person, Nam-min. There’s people who are very good at certain things, but there’s no smart people. Surgeons and rocket scientists are just as capable of being complete dickheads as anybody else outside of their fields. Your area of skill is in dance and science, maybe not other areas uni is making you tap into and that’s okay. It doesn’t make you a stupid person.”

NEMO:

Appa talked very kindly– kinder than Nemo knew he deserved. 

And it was this kindness that made him cry a little harder. Appa was probably right, because Appa was right about most things. Wasn’t that how kids always felt about their parents? It’s what made standing up to them so hard sometimes. And it made leaving them hard too. For this entire semester, Nemo had tried to do his best, to be an adult without Appa’s help, but the truth was he didn’t think he’d been ready. 

“S-so what am I supposed to do?” Nemo asked– wanting desperately to be told the answer, for once. He’d really tried to figure it out himself, and he’d failed. Couldn’t Appa tell him the answer, just one more time?

MARLIN:

“Right. I think it’s very obvious you have three options. I doubt you’ll be allowed to make up your final exams, so one of these three things is going to happen and it’s up to you which feels right for you.” Mu-yeol said gently, reaching forward to pat Nemo’s hair. 

“One. You retake all your classes next term. Full time student. You stay in the dorms or you can move home and I’ll pay the housing contract severance fee. You might lose your scholarship but it’s okay. I think I can afford it next semester. Two; you drop out and come home. We can try uni again if and when you’re ready. Three; I don’t think they’ll let you stay in the dorms if you stay in school but drop down to part-time, but, maybe they will? If so you can choose to come home or dorm, drop down to part-time hours, and if you lose your scholarship I’ll cover it.”

A beat. 

“Also, you’re nineteen. I don’t expect you to have your life figured out or even know what’s going to be the right decision for you a month, six months, a year from now. But one of those options is the right one for you for the now. You have to pick which one, Nam-minnie, I won’t force you to leave or stay in school one way or the other. I presented you a middle ground of going part-time if neither staying nor leaving feels right. You don’t have to decide immediately either. Sooner is better. But you can think it over some.”

NEMO:

All three options stressed Nemo out.

He’d wanted to quit uni about 24 hours ago. He was just so exhausted, so exhausted that the only thing that appealed to him was what he’d done– gotten the fuck away from the campus, disappeared and become a nobody in some sparse campsite far far away. But of course, deep down, he knew it wasn’t what he really wanted. He wanted a break. He wanted help. He wanted a fresh chance. He wanted all of his professors to tell him he didn’t have to take the exams (this was super unrealistic). 

If he dropped out, he’d never be a dancer, though. He knew that. A fairy like him needed the connections uni could bring. So he didn’t want to drop out.

Full time filled his brain with bees all over again, bringing back the panic so big, he could choke on it. Thinking about it made him wanna hop in Tae’s truck and drive even further away.

So– part time. Part time it felt like was the only actual option, even though he didn’t know what that meant or would look like, and if he had to leave the dorms– which was the only part of uni he’d really enjoyed so far– he’d be so disappointed. 

“Okay,” Nemo uttered in a small, defeated voice. “I’ll…think about it, I guess.” For the first time, he glanced back up at Appa, his eyes still puffy, leaking tears. “I really am sorry,” he said one more time. 

MARLIN:

“You have to communicate with me when you’re having a hard time. I can’t help you if I don’t know you need help,” Mu-yeol said gently, resting a hand on Nemo’s shoulder. 

He sighed. 

“Since I know you aren’t missing and are safe. Do you…want to come home? Or no?”

NEMO:

Confusion fluttered across Nemo’s face. The way this usually worked was– Appa took him home. It was that simple. Whether he had run away, gotten lost, or had to escape from his grandparents, Appa appearing always meant that Nemo had to get in a car or on a train and that was it. It could be comforting, in a way. No matter how nutty things got, Appa would arrive, and Nemo knew he’d be safe.

He’d never been given a choice before. Then again, he was 19 now. 

It still, sort of, felt like a trap. He knew what the right answer was. If he went back now, he could maybe take one of his exams– his contemporary dance exam. Which was just a paper, but it was a paper he’d written the most of. Maybe he could finish it, or turn it in unfinished, and explain. It was weird– this had always been an option, Nemo knew that, but only with Appa here did things feel easier to think about. Was it always going to be that way? No matter how old Nemo got? 

He still hesitated. “Home,” he said, after that beat. “..Tae needs to return the truck anyway.” 

MARLIN:

He nodded slowly and held an arm open for Nemo to curl up to his side. 

“Okay. Sounds good— and you tell me when you decide what we’re doing moving forward, okay?” Mu-yeol said, voice even as the calm spot in a river. 

“You’re an adult now, this is the part of life where you make the decisions. I’m just here.”

NEMO: 

But what if I don’t want to be? 

Nemo didn’t say it outloud. He probably didn’t have to, as he accepted Appa’s hug. The entire time they’d been talking, he’d wanted one desperately. He’d wanted one, actually, since he’d gotten injured, but there was a voice in his head scolding him, telling him, You’re too old for that. Too old to ask for help, too old to rely on Appa, too old to miss him. 

“I don’t feel like an adult,” Nemo confessed this, at least. “I dunno how to be one.” 

MARLIN:

Mu-yeol smiled sadly and played with the hair at the nape of Nemo’s neck, pressing a kiss to his temple. 

“I don’t either, kid.” He admitted. “I’ve been faking this whole adult thing for twenty-three years.”

Some years better than others. 

“You’ll get there too, as you get older.”

NEMO: 

Would he? 

Nemo doubted it. He wasn’t even sure he believed Appa, who was always the biggest and most adult-like person in a room, at least to Nemo. He didn’t think that would ever change. Even when Appa was depressed, didn’t Nemo still expect him to know everything? 

The future just felt like a complex problem that Nemo was never going to be smart enough to solve. That’s why he kept running from it. He had to stop though. If he ever wanted to get smarter – braver – more capable – to be anything like Appa. 

After a few more flits in which Nemo lingered in Appa’s arms and sniffled and wiped at his cheeks, he finally pulled away. It was time to go, he knew that. He trudged back toward Tae and Robbie, and only when he glanced up from the wet grass did he see Robbie looking at him – he’d probably been watching Nemo the whole time. 

Nemo’s face went red and he looked away. He probably should apologize to Robbie too, but he was too ashamed. 

And so he walked past him again and went to Tae. “We gotta head back,” he said quietly. “I’m sorry for dragging you out here.” 

TAE: 

Tae immediately opened his arms and pulled Nemo in, turning so they were sort of hug-shuffling back to the truck. "Hey you didn't drag me anywhere I didn't want to be, okay? I love you." 

[rineedagger]

Hi, Im right in front of your window. I can see where you could be if you have chosen to stay. Very tiny compare to where I am standing at, surrounded by green grass, far singings of birds, not enough fresh breeze to feel alive and the constant chats of moms with their sons. I can hear the mumbling of a radio inside a car a couple of blocks away.

The sun is in its lasts minutes to go away. A clear sky with elongated white clouds here and there. Really frustrating because I can’t focus my eyes anywhere, not even in the trees in front of me. I can see the sand and the ants underneath me, though. Yet not a fucking peck of it.

I don’t know if my scent isn’t back or it’s simply the boredom of summer that can’t bring anything refreshing, new, strong, transcendenting nor familiar to my brain. If I pay a bit of attention and move I can perceive some fresh grass and my own clothes scent. It’s really frustrating. Can’t seem to find anything remotely interesting, stimulating, life-awakening.

I used to find it in between the leaves, under the rain and a strong cold stream. The bustle of a congested street, or the crushing vibration of a drop in the middle of the road.

It’s been a while since I felt this small yet I can’t seem to fit not even in the tiniest of places. People bother me but people give me. Once more, life terrifies me; makes me feel out of my system, like if I’ve been made in another flesh.

I’m in the middle of a changing. Summer to autumn, but the agonic warmth still follows. All I want is the night, the rains and the cold. Back in the days, I remember, didn’t let myself see the sun nor the flowers because I wasn’t made for them. I thought maybe I punished myself, maybe I was saving myself not tasting the sweets of colors. But now I get it. No matter how hard I try, there’s no better place for me than a dark cold hollowed night. There are so many things that cold can give. Everyone understands the beauty of the forrest when is sunny and vividly shiny. But, the magic in it when the fog devours it, is unbeatable.

Fear starves me to the bone, going weak and sour. All I can do is let it destroy me until the pain explotes in pure anger and so everything there is, I devore. It’s so strong, as strong as my monsters, that I’ve been trying to keep it under the rug too long, because she does not differentiate between a friend and a foe. Truth is, I’m not as selfless as I sound, but every bit of darkness I don’t allow.

Now look at me, look at this mess who can’t even find her peace in one cloud. There’s no other choice, but to let her be. Knowing what she can shatter, ravage and knock down. But this damn armor, it gets so heavy that it hurts like million needles sliding into my viscera.

This is who I am, only the night, the rain and the blood refreshes my will and gives me life.

The sun has left, and the sky has turned pinkie red by now. Who should I be and what should I drown. And yes, it’s been almost an hour.

[kdramacrybaby]

King the Land (2023)

Genre: Romance, Comedy

Synopsis: Cheon Sa-rang has always dreamed of working at a hotel ever since she was a kid, so she works hard and finally earns a spot at the luxury King Hotel. Very early, she rises to the top as their best employee, and she's living her dream. Through promotions of the hotel, she meets the hotel owner's son - Go Won. In the middle of an inheritance war with his sister, Go Won has little time for anything else, but they keep running into each other. Despite their initial dislike for each other, they soon come to realize that they both have a lot to learn from each other.

Episode info: 16 episodes / Runtime around 60 minutes

Lead cast: Lee Jun-ho (Go Won), Im Yoon-ha (Ceon Sa-rang), Ahn Se-ha (Noh Sang-sik), Go Won-hee (Oh Pyung-hwa), Kim Ga-eun (Kang Da-eul)

Link to watch: You can watch on Netflix or Dramacool

Drama rec masterlist | Drama rant thread (beware of spoilers)

I'm going to completely honest here - I almost stopped watching after the very first episode. Without spoiling much, I can say they ended it on a joke that had me cringing so hard it was physically uncomfortable for me, so I decided to just stop it there and then. But then I kept seeing it on my dash everywhere, and it did look kind of cute, so I skipped past the joke and pretended it never happened.

And yes, I did like this drama - but not as much now as I did after getting over that initial joke, and definitely not as much as the rest of Tumblr seems to.

Overall, it's a cute, typical rom-com with every single cliché you can name. All the longing looks, the awkward slo-mo shots from multiple camera angles, the one-liners that just make you either squeal or cringe - it has it all. If you like rom-coms, this is a must-watch for you.

Also, I first want to say that yes, Go Won does have some pretty decent character growth throughout the drama, but oh how he annoyed me at first. Especially when we're talking about the whole 'dating your boss thing' this drama decided to do. I'm personally never really about that, especially when there's such a large gap in power between them - a gap he really struggles to respect at first, and that is what annoys me the most.

I thought they were really cute at first, but then I started watching Hidden Love also, and somehow this drama just didn't do it for me anymore. (They still are cute, it's just not... really my vibe of relationship, if that makes sense?)

And compared to other very similar kdramas I've watched like Business Proposal and Sh**ting Stars, this is definitely my least favorite, and it is not a drama I will watch again.

This drama is definitely shiny and pretty and fun to watch, but, to me, it started feeling hollow about half-way through, and I stopped caring about the story as much. I began rooting more for the b-plot stories of Sa-rang's friends than I did for the actual main couple.

Okay, I didn't expect this review to come out as negative as it did, because it's not actually a bad drama, it's just not 100% what I'm looking for in a good rom-com. I'm sure anyone into romance would love this.

[free-pool-trash]

happiness - peter maximoff

yay a new peter fic <3 i was feeling a little unmotivated for a few days (since our boy wasn’t in episode 8 at all :/) but im back 😎 although im back in school so i might be on and off for a while 😩✋🏻

!!!it’s not a songfic those lyrics at the start are just my inspo!!!

word count: 5k <3 😳

warnings: maybe swearing but i dont think so i cant remember, peter being sad, angst, but mostly fluff, WandaVision spoilers maybe??? I pretty much made up this plot so idk, endgame spoilers, reader was an avenger, kissing but it’s not graphic😽 probably some mistakes yk how it is

feedback is appreciated <3

tagging: @enchantedcruelsummer (should i make a peter maximoff taglist? let me know and I’ll do it)

masterlist

haunted by the look in my eyes that would’ve loved you for a lifetime

leave it all behind

& there is happiness

Loneliness had always been something that plagued him. That and a plethora of other negative emotions.

There wasn’t a day that went by where Peter Maximoff wasn’t made to feel like a loser. Admittedly, he’d never held himself to a high standard, he grew up thinking that he’d never fit in anywhere and eventually that thought mutated into a lifestyle as he began isolating himself from the world around him, either far too good or heartbreakingly not enough to be a part of that crowd.

He liked spending time with himself. Nobody else knew him the way he knew him, and still, he found nothing but an overwhelming hollow space where his deepest most important hopes, aspirations, dreams and self discoveries should have resided.

Peter had always put this feeling of exile down to the fact that he was a mutant, it was the most likely explanation, right?

It was only when he’d decided to join the X-Men that he finally came to the conclusion that maybe the rest of the world wasn’t the problem, nor was his mutation the problem, but that he himself was the problem. For even in a school full of people exactly like him he was still the same loser that he was in his mother’s basement.

And he was under no illusions that that was exactly what his teammates saw in him; nothing. No potential. Just a space holder to bring the numbers up.

Super speed was incredible. That’s how Peter acknowledged jobs well done, he praised his speed but never himself. He just saved Charles and Erik from a room full of armed guards? No that wasn’t him, that was simply his speed. He saved an entire mansion full of people from a potentially fatal explosion? Nothing special, Kurt probably could’ve done the same.

Forget all of the good deeds and saved lives because the bottom line of it all, to him at least, was that all he was good for was cheeky one liners and hopeless kleptomania.

His life took a turn for the worse when he found himself being mind controlled in an alternate universe. And even then, he was playing the part of someone that wasn’t him, the thought humbled him, reconnected him to his roots and reintroduced him to his life long philosophy that he’d never be anything more than a social pariah. Not even an alternate reality could accept him for who he was. There wasn’t a warm welcome and despite not knowing what was going on, the definition of “imposter” or the weirder, “recast”, still shot to kill.

He settled on the notion that he was an inter dimensional waste of space. At least in WestView he could be blissfully ignorant, let the real him be drowned mercilessly in favour of being an integral part of someone’s life- to feel important, even if it wasn’t real.

When WestView fell apart he was completely lost. In every sense of the word. In a new world with no way home and as it turned out, nobody was looking for him. Although he didn’t expect anyone to care, it still stung that nobody did. He always hoped that one day Erik would step up as a father figure for him, this; getting kidnapped and smuggled into a different dimension, seemed like the perfect moment for that epic father son moment, but it wouldn’t surprise Peter if his father has yet to notice his disappearance.

But then, seemingly out of nowhere, he came into contact with a beacon of hope. A guiding star that might possibly lead him to an existence consisting of something other than misery and self loathing.

It offered him a choice; return to being the self proclaimed loser he was known as or start fresh as someone new and mysterious, with first impressions yet to be made and conclusions about him yet to be drawn. Peter had known himself to be rash in the past, when it came to making decisions he had the tendency to act impulsively, never putting too much thought into how his decisions would affect his life in the long term. The choice before him now is no different, he knew exactly what he wanted going forward, however selfish the choice may have been, the second he realised it was an option his heart was set on it.

That previously mentioned beacon of hope arrived to him in the form of a girl, in the form of you. An ex-avenger and close friend of Wanda’s, you were hired by S.W.O.R.D to help them clean up the more ‘sensitive’ fallout that the fall of WestView brought about. Obviously, they were sticking you- the only other avenger with magik- on babysitting and rehabilitation rather than letting you go after your best friend who had gone completely off the rails. Having said that though, you didn’t want anyone else handling him.

You hadn’t watched WandaVision, nor were you even aware that any of it was going on until it had reached a boiling point and you got a call from Monica Rambeau, she’d begged you to come and wait on the edge of town while she went in and act as her eyes on the outside along with Jimmy Woo.

That’s where you stayed until the hex broke down.

As soon as the barrier came down the base you manned was overrun by an armada of terribly confused and distressed citizens, Monica and Wanda were not among them but in their places stumbled in Darcy and the man playing the role of Pietro.

Jimmy appointed himself to Darcy, who in all honesty seemed relatively unscathed by the situation while you made a beeline for the dirty blonde charading as your former, dead teammate.

Peter was, to put it simply, completely enthralled by you as soon as you’d strolled over to him and in the moment he’d put his almost magnetic attraction to you down to the fact that you were the first friendly face he’d seen upon breaking free of Agatha’s possession.

But one thing in particular struck him; you’d asked him his name. You hadn’t immediately assumed him to be some knock off Pietro, as everyone else had. You acknowledged that he had his own personal identity and despite how often he caught himself hating the person he was, he found that when it was torn away from him that he wanted it back. The simple question you posed gave him the opportunity to regain his identity.

“Peter. My name is Peter.” He answered you, almost unsure of himself and you found your interest in the man piqued even further.

He remembered with perfect clarity the way you’d offered him a grin, tilted your hand, extended your hand and said, “Well it’s nice to meet you, Peter. Come on, I’ll be your babysitter for the next while.” There was something about the way you’d laughed after saying the words and the slight, yet unmistakable, glint of mischief in your eyes that had him captivated from the get go.

With you came a whirlwind of new emotions. After only a few weeks of knowing you, Peter noticed he wasn’t as lonely as he had been back home. He didn’t hate himself half as much either, he wasn’t entirely free of self deprovative tendencies and maybe he never would be, but undoubtedly, he likes himself more in this world than he ever had in his last. He thanked you and your determination to make him “a functioning member of society” for that.

It didn’t feel belittling, the way you helped him. You hadn’t dragged him to your favourite mall every weekend just to taunt him about how he couldn’t stop himself from stealing something. Even the very first time, when he’d sped away from you and returned within a second adoring a pair of freshly stolen sunglasses. Your only reaction had been to laugh and casually place your hands on both sides of his face.

“At least remember to take the tag off next time, speedy.” You’d muttered, subtly pulling the tacky stickers off the arms of his shades. No, you weren’t dragging him sight seeing or forcing him to help you go clothes shopping because you thought he was a loser who needed reforming you were doing it because you were a true friend who wanted him to succeed.

The pair of you seemed like two peas in a pod. Which to be fair, you were. Peter Maximoff intrigued you in every sense of the word. He was new, quite literally other worldly, he was kind, he was funny, he was perfectly mischievous and completely wonderful.

What caught your eye the most was the way he held himself, as if he wasn’t entirely comfortable in his own skin. It became apparent to you that he lacked confidence with the phrases he usually tacked onto the ends of his sentences. When you’d invite him to hang out in the beginning his response would always be something along the lines of, “Sure. If you want me to.” But the excitable puppy dog eyes told you that he was dying for someone to want him to tag along some place.

There was a certain understanding between you. You were both more than accustomed with the harrowing feeling of being alone and even though you’d never exactly voiced those thoughts with each other, you couldn’t deny that his was a spirit kindred to your own and he felt it too.

Since the Avengers has disbanded, one of your best friends, Natasha, was dead and your other best friend, Wanda, was gone completely off the rails and the people chasing her wouldn’t let you anywhere near her or even attempt to help pull her out of her darkness. You were being kept as a wildcard in case they needed her taken down. Peter was no stranger to the feeling of being cast aside and so he quickly responded to your frustrations, and in doing so, forced himself out of his comfort zone to be there for you. To his complete shock though, you’d been so appreciative of his efforts.

You never failed to thank him for the little things he did for you, always complimenting his mutation when he’d use it and giving him the recognition he never received at home. The friendship he formed with you was so… two sided, again, something he wasn’t accustomed to before. It didn’t involve him giving everything he had to offer and receiving nothing in return, you matched his energy meticulously and never left him hanging.

In a series of firsts, he didn’t wonder whether or not you genuinely liked him, never feeling the need or want to question it as you’d left him with no reason to doubt.

As he walked around the mall with you now, his mind brought his attention back to the question you’d asked him rather casually a few nights ago. You were both lounging on your couch, watching some ridiculous reality show (a favourite of yours and Peter’s) when you’d turned your head to look at him, a thoughtful look on your face. “Do you think when S.W.O.R.D figures the technology out to crack into other realities, you’ll go back to yours?”

The question had taken him aback for a second, in all honesty, he hadn’t thought about going home, not when he was with you at least and considering he’d become your roommate about three weeks after he got out of WestView, the thought of returning to his old life had barely crossed his mind.

Being an ex-Avenger you were fairly well off, you lived alone in a two bedroom apartment in New York that you’d bought to be closer to Stark tower. Peter had nowhere to go and aside from having a spare room to offer you’d also been sort of lost in the current of the busy city with everyone you once loved in the area either dead, on the run or busy elsewhere.

While the question hadn’t crossed Peter’s mind, it had crossed yours on several occasions. He’d been staying with you for six months and the moment you realised that he was becoming one of the most important people in your life, the thought of him leaving you too weighed on your mind but at the end of the day you wanted him to feel happy. He deserved to feel happy and if going back to his reality brought him that happiness then you’d support him.

“Dunno,” he’d replied, turning to face you, chucking a handful of popcorn at you when you looked incredulous at his response, “To be honest I haven’t really thought about it, m’way too busy babysitting you anyway.” He joked, effortlessly dodging the few pieces of popcorn you attempted to throw at him.

For the last few nights, the question haunted him, but it wasn’t just the question that was bothering him. You were at the forefront of his mind as he replayed the past six months of his life which also happened to be the best six months of his life. WestView put him through hell but coming out the other side of it and meeting you felt like heaven.

He weighed up the pros and cons of returning to his native timeline. The cons: he’d have to leave you behind, he’d go back to being the loser who nobody took seriously, his talents would be downplayed and disregarded and he’d inevitably end up revisiting his lifestyle of solitude. Then there was the pros: he’d get to reunite with his pac man machine. He couldn’t manage to think up anything else.

If he stayed he’d have everything he ever wanted and needed. You’d be there and he knew you always would be, besides he couldn’t leave you knowing that you needed him. If he left who would wake you up when you had night terrors about the catastrophe that your reality was still recovering from? There would be nobody there to comfort you when you woke up from the nightmares, reliving the deaths of Natasha, Tony or Vision and the experience of being snapped out of existence? If he wasn’t there to make you laugh when you were about to cry then who would be? In his heart of hearts he knew you had a huge support system at your disposal, he’d met most of them. Even though he was well aware that Sam visited you as often as he could, that Bucky wrote you letters on a monthly basis and sometimes tagged along with Sam on his visits, that Stephen Strange appeared in your apartment whenever the urge struck him, that the literal god of thunder invited you out for beer whenever he was visiting Earth, that the little spider-kid, also named Peter, swung by your apartment at least once a week to tell you all about school and his good deeds. Despite knowing all of this and knowing all of these people loved you dearly, Peter wanted to be your main source of support, he didn’t want to be someone who came and went, who’d love you then leave you. He wanted to be with you through anything and everything and the feeling that you’d love him for a lifetime had him satisfied with the decision he was about to make.

If leaving his old life meant he could stay here, with you, and experience happiness for more than a fleeting moment then he’d simply; leave it all behind.

“I’ve been thinking about what you asked me the other night.” He spoke through a mouthful of curly fries. You were sitting in the food court of the mall when he decided to let you in on his desire to stay with you indefinitely.

You raised your eyebrow, “You? Putting thought into an answer? Peter, I think I’m starting to become a bad influence on you.” You told him teasingly, taking a long sip of your drink as he rolled his eyes humorously.

“You’re a terrible influence which is exactly why I’ve decided to stay here and put you on the straight and narrow.” The glee you felt at his statement was undeniable, your eyes lit up and your lips curled upwards.

“You’re staying? Really staying?” Your smile was contagious, Peter’s face now painted with a wide grin as he nodded his head.

In a moment of weakness he frantically added, “Y’know only if you want me to though. If you don’t that’s completely cool.” He rushed through the words, feeling more embarrassed when the fond look on your face never faded.

“Of course I want you to stay. You mean a lot to me.” You reassured him, a gentle smile on your lips as you reached across the metal table, intertwining your fingers with his.

Peter squeezed your hand gratefully, holding it in his grasp securely and allowing his smile to return to his face, “I know. You mean a lot to me too.” It was somewhat of an understatement, he was starting to understand that you didn’t just mean a lot, but that you meant everything.

His resolution lifted a huge weight off your shoulders that you wouldn’t be losing yet another best friend. You were glad he’d be with you when everything blew over with Wanda, the two of them definitely had the potential to develop a beautiful sibling relationship and they both deserved that. Of course, Peter would never replace Pietro and having known them both it was obvious just how different the two men were, the only thing they had in common being their powers and last name. Still, he and Wanda would still be able to work on it. He didn’t hate her after WestView and you knew Wanda well enough to know that she was kind hearted and she’d be more than willing to give him a chance. When she eventually comes back to her senses, that it.

As the months went on, life with you and Peter seemed to only get better. You never stopped laughing, your nightmares died down and Peter had taken on a whole new lease of life. Yourself and Peter were the perfect example of meeting the right person at the right time, you balanced each other out and accentuated the other’s good qualities.

Peter could now say with complete confidence that he was happy and what’s more is that he was finally sure that he was making someone happy.

Up until nearly eleven months of living together your relationship had been purely platonic, save for the constant flirting but flirtation pretty much ran in yours and Peter’s blood. Peter wasn’t going to lie to himself, he’d fallen for you the second you’d peeled the security tags off his stolen sunglasses.

You, on the other hand, had been fighting with yourself because yes, you love Peter but you couldn’t have told him when there was the possibility he’d eventually leave and now so much time has passed and you’ve got such a good thing going you didn’t have it in you to ruin it.

However, all of that changed when your original Maximoff best friend came knocking on your door.

Wanda was on the run. She’d caused an amazing amount of chaos but Stephen Strange and S.W.O.R.D were hot on her trail and now she needed a place to lay low with the twins. She figured there was no place more reliable to go than to the always open arms of her best friend, who conveniently had a divinity for earth magik and could muster up a protective barrier without raising suspicions. And that’s exactly where she found herself; outside your door.

You’d been chasing Peter around the apartment when you heard the knock on the door. Peter was on the opposite end of the kitchen to you, using the bar as a shield from you. “You better get that.”

“Oh you’d like that wouldn’t you?” You glared as you spoke, it was his own fault really. What sort of idiot jumpscares a witch while she’s mid-meditation? He’d frightened you so badly you accidentally blasted a ball of your signature green energy and ruined your favourite couch throw pillow. When you were ready to pounce on the scared speedster the knocks sounded again, more frantic this time.

With one last glare towards Peter you stomped towards the door. Your anger melted away completely when you saw her. Her hood was up and she looked completely exhausted, two small hooded little boys by her side.

“Wanda…” You breathed out, relief flooding your system at the sight of her alive. She didn’t get a chance to speak before your arms were pulling her against you tightly, hugging her as if your life depended on it. Wanda returned in your embrace, allowing herself to relax for the first time in nearly a year, she sniffled against your shoulder, holding back tears as she realised how much she’d truly missed you.

Billy and Tommy watched in confusion as their mother cried into your shoulder. They didn’t know who you were, all their mother had told them was that they were going somewhere safe.

It was the yell of one of the boys that caused you and Wanda to separate, “Uncle P!” With that you felt a familiar rush of air across your leg but instead of Peter appearing one of the kids was gone.

You shared a perplexed look with Wanda, although your confusion was for different reasons.

“Hey hell raisers!” Peter responded, catching the mini speedster who all but threw himself at him barely regaining his balance before the other child had flung himself into the hug.

“Wanda? Those two… are they...?” You started, at a loss for words Wanda cut you off quietly, her tone as disbelieving as yours.

“My children? Yes. Is that…?” You nodded your head numbly, anticipating the end of her question.

“Your fake brother? Yeah.” Quickly, you realised you and a wanted woman catching up with the door wide open wasn’t ideal and you ushered Wanda inside, shutting the door when she walked in.

“Hey.” Peter greeted her simply, as if he hadn’t been used as a meat puppet in her altered reality. It wasn’t in his nature to hold any grudges.

“Hi?” Wanda replied, her voice still twinged with confusion.

“Peter, will you keep an eye on the kids for a bit? Wanda and I have some catching up to do.” You asked him with a nervous laugh, just thankful that Wanda was too tired to argue with your suggestion.

Peter ruffled the boys’ hair and gave you a grin, “Only if you stop trying to kill me.”

You rolled your eyes as you began to lead Wanda into your bedroom, “You’re on probation, jerk.” You called over your shoulder.

Once you were securely in your bedroom, the door locked and sitting comfortably you fixed Wanda with an amused look, “I’d ask you what’s new but I’m not sure I even wanna know.”

Wanda gave you a sad smile while she shook her head, “No, you probably don’t. I will tell you tomorrow, I don’t want to get into it tonight. I’m so tired.” She admitted, her voice overcome with sadness.

“I’ll pump up the air mattress and you and the boys can sleep in here for however long you need. I’d offer you the spare room but that’s where Peter’s been staying and I don’t think empty food containers are the kind of decor you’d be into.” Wanda nodded, squeezing your hand gratefully.

“So his name is Peter?” She asked, curious about the man Agatha had used to trick her in WestView.

You nodded in confirmation, “Yeah. Peter Maximoff, actually.”

Wanda’s brows came to a furrow at that, “Maximoff? So he’s a relation?”

“Yes and no. Peter is from a different reality but he’s still a Maximoff and he’s got super speed. So, and this is just my theory, while you’re not directly related he could still be your brother- if you wanted him to.” You explained, as gently as you could, not trying to push her too far but to nudge the idea in her direction.

Wanda, to your surprise, didn't seem to hate the suggestion, “What is he like?”

A genuine smile made it onto your face then, as you shot into your description of your roommate, “He’s caring, funny, a little bit of a kleptomaniac but he’s working on it. He’s understanding and moronically selfless, moronic in the sense that he doesn’t even realise he’s being selfless. Huge pain in the ass too.” Wanda had a soft smile on her face by the time you’d finished.

“You like him.” Was all she said and you let out a laugh in disbelief, standing up and opening the door.

“Go grab a shower. I’ll have Peter blow up the air mattress while I go introduce myself to my god sons.”

“I thought you’d at least wait until I actually asked you.” Wanda laughed as you walked out of the room.

Things moved fairly quickly after that. As promised you introduced yourself to Billy and Tommy as their god mother, which they seemed more than thrilled about and you assumed that excitement had to do with whatever description of you Peter had given them. Wanda and the twins were all cleaned and fed and had all but collapsed into bed, foregoing the air mattress and huddling together in your double bed instead.

“Where are you sleeping, mother Teresa?” Peter teased as he noticed your eyes drooping where you stood.

“On the couch probably. Or the air mattress.” You mumbled, cutting yourself off with a yawn.

Peter, unimpressed with your options, scoffed, “No way. Come on, you can bunk with me.”

Much like Wanda, you were too tired to argue and you let Peter pull you to his, surprisingly clean, room by the hand.

You both crawled into the bed, lying close together despite the amount of empty space on the mattress.

“How are you feeling about all of this?” Your soft voice broke through the silence and Peter turned his head to look at you.

“About Wanda?” You nodded your head, watching him intently as he rolled onto his side, facing you more comfortably.

Peter shrugged lightly, “I’m feeling ok. Just glad the twins still see me as their cool uncle.” You let out a small laugh at his response.

“Wanda was asking about you. Seemed interested in getting to know the real you.” You informed him, your heartwarming as you watched a hopeful look fall across his face.

A lull settled over the room once again and Peter caught himself staring at you. His eyes drifted over every visible part of you, reminding him of most of the points on his pros list for staying in your universe; your eyes, your lashes, your nose, your lips, you.

“What’re you thinking about?” The sound of your tired voice pulled him out of his thoughts and ultimately pushed him to bite the bullet and tell you how he’s feeling. With you curled up beside him, in his bed, fighting sleep just to stay in his company for as long as you could; he knew there would be no better time.

“Just about how happy I am to be here with you.” He answered you honestly, the butterflies in both of your stomachs fluttering in sync at his words.

You trailed a hand under the duvet and onto the bedsheets between your bodies, feeling around until you found his hand and gently intertwined your fingers. “I’m happy you decided to stay.”

“What you’ve all gone through in this timeline sucks- don’t get me wrong-“ Peter started sincerely, scooting closer to you and dropping his head back down on the edge of your pillow, leaving the pair of you practically nose to nose as he went on.

“And I hate that Wanda had to go through so much… but I’m really glad that it led me to you.” Peter swore in that moment, right after the confession left his mouth, that he could die right now and be completely content knowing that you now knew how he felt.

His heart stopped, and he thought that maybe he was about to die, when you gave him the softest, sweetest smile he’d ever been on the receiving end of and whispered, “I feel the same.”

Time moved in slow motion as he felt you moving your intertwined hands towards your lips, your lips pressed gently against the back of Peter’s hand before you brought them to rest against your chest.

It was a fact to say that Peter Maximoff had never felt intimacy quite like this before. But, experiencing it now, with you, led him to wonder how he’d ever survived without it. He wasn’t sure whether it was natural to crave more, especially when the affection you were showing him was so gentle, but he didn’t care as he let the impulsive side of him take over.

Not sparing another word, Peter closed the small distance between your lips and his. His free hand cupped your jaw while yours wasted no time in getting tangled in his silver hair.

His lips moved softly and surprisingly slowly over yours and he savoured the feeling of your hand holding his while your other got lost in his hair, your body pressed up against him, the way your jaw moved against his palm as you reciprocated the movement of his lips and the taste of your lips, promising himself he’d never let the memory slip from his mind for as long as he lived.

With complete clarity, Peter could say he had felt true, genuine happiness and he had no doubt in his mind that there was absolutely nothing Charles, Hank, Scott or anyone else from his original timeline could say to make him leave this happiness behind. Because in the process of forgetting his old life, he couldn’t deny that he has undoubtedly found himself in the position of a man who had so much more to live for.

[mrs-gucci]

Doth Not Fear, For Our Future Awaits {Prince Kylo Ren x Reader}

@babbushka:

Happy follower milestone my dear friend!! My prompt idea for your consideration: A medieval AU where reader is a lady in waiting to the Queen at the royal court, and Kylo is the crown prince who is in love with her. They can never be together...or can they? However you'd like to take this, if you decide at all, would be so much fun! xoxoxo :)

author’s notes: hello, hello! I’m baaaaack after a lengthy case of writers block 😩 my dearest friend, my beloved, thank you for this wonderful request!! I’ll be honest, I restarted this about three different times, but I’m very pleased with how this one turned out for you <3 @babbushka​

warnings (what you see is what you’ll get!): fluff. forbidden romance/love. passionate kissing. themes of infidelity. use of Shakespearean English. some insults are thrown around.

no tw’s :)

word count: 1.6k

my general taglist peeps! @safarigirlsp​ @babbushka​ ​@mrs-zimmerman​ @dirtytissuebox​ @thepalaceofmelanie​ @einmal-im-traum​ kylo’s taglist peeps! @goddessofsprings @icarusinthesea @lumdelacour @readingreaver @eagerforhoney​ @trubluepensfan​ @beachwoodmonet​ (if you’d like to be added to or removed from any of my taglists, the link to the google form is HERE or at the top of my masterlist.)

[NOT my art/image. full credit to the artist, therealmcgee, and found via Pinterest]

A gentle autumn breeze rustles the masterpiece of dark tresses that sit atop the head of crown prince Kylo Ren, who stands alone in the moonlight-illuminated garden. The birds have ceased their chirps and allowed for the nighttime singers to shine through, crickets and katydids creating a peaceful melody from amongst the grasses.

He stands by the pond, staring down at his gently rippled reflection in the water. A grimace seems to be permanently etched onto his expression whenever he’s in the presence of his overbearing mother or pesky new bride, creating creases in his skin that shall surely remain for the rest of his living days.

As he looks down upon himself under the soft moonlight, he can only see the miserable face of a young man trapped in the cage of a legacy, unable to free himself from the heavy chains of expectation and tradition. Tonight, though, those chains bear an even greater weight for the young royal.

You're all he desires in life, the only thing he wishes to seek out and fight for. Not the kingdom of Alderaan, not his new bride, not even his mother; it’s you. And now, he’s forever bound to the wrong woman, restrained yet again by the rigid ways of his family’s traditions.

What if he no longer wants to be Prince?

A hollow footstep on the stone courtyard startles him from his thoughts and he turns around to gaze upon the intruder of his serene privacy.

“I believeth thy new bride is awaiting that lady marital bedding.”

His expression softens upon the sight of you striding towards him, turning fully around to properly face you as you stand before him. He holds your smaller hands in his much larger ones.

“The lady shalt beest waiting for an eternity, then. I am doubtful of that lady did suppose pureness, if 't be true i am truthful.”

The two of you laugh softly together at his comment.

“I wanteth nay other, Y/N, only thee.”

You offer the crown prince a sad smile. “And I only desire thee, Kylo, but we simply cannot beest together. I am mistress in waiting to thy mother, the queen, and ye art did set to becometh king. 't is 'gainst the laws of the land and we shalt certes beest hanged if 't be true anyone ever did discover our love affair.”

He sighs, forehead pressing against yours as he looks longingly into your eyes. “I wish things wast not this way, yond people couldst beest free to marry for love, not for status or bloodlines.”

“Me too.” You lean into him, bringing your mouth up to hover over his, and his down to meet yours. Warm, gentle wafts of his breath smooth out across your lips and you give a soft whimper in response, pressing yourself further against him. “Telleth me all thee would do to have me as thy bride, Kylo.”

Your voice is barely above a whisper, considering you’re barely able to breathe through your nose by now, with your face practically smashed up against him, but that’s the absolute last thing you give thought to at a moment like this. He opens his mouth and lazily attempts to capture you in a kiss, fingertips pressing harder into your sides.

“Gods, I would doth aught for thee. I would giveth up mine coronet, mine legacy for thy handeth.”

Slowly, your arms slither up around the back of his neck, feeling a familiar heat rising and bubbling in your nether regions.  “Telleth me more.”

He’s practically slobbering over you now, so desperate to press his lips unto yours. The hunger surges through him as he pulls you flush against him.

“I would square for thee, square anyone for thy love to belong to only me. I would drop of sorrow mine bloody, beating heart out of mine own chest for thee.”

Your pulse throbs neath your flesh, the upbeat tempo of your heartbeat thrumming in your ears. You sigh into his open mouth, hand coming up to grab hold of his silky hair. 

“Moo.”

Suddenly, he sweeps you up off your feet and instantly presses you against the side of the nearest structure, effectively caging you in with his massive form. He snarls softly, pinning you even further into the wall, forcing a quiet gasp from your lips.

“By gods, Y/N, I would killeth for thee.”

You tighten your grip in his hair and pull him down into a sloppy, passionate kiss. He returns the embrace with eager lips, tongue prodding and exploring every cavern of your mouth. His pelvis presses right up against your lower abdomen, rubbing his stiffening length up against you.

“Kylo.” A sigh pushes its way through your pursed lips as Kylo’s head dips down, lips pecking at the taut skin on your neck.

“Did shalt we runneth hence together. I wanteth to declare our love to the kingdom tonight.” His face lights up as he holds yours in his massive hands, smiling. “I’m sick of hiding in the shadows, sick of having to keepeth myself hence from thee.”

You’re riddled with worry over this sudden decision, rubbing the strong upper arms of your lover. “Art thee sure? This idea worries me greatly, mine sweeting. What if 't be true we receiveth did doth catch? They wilt throweth us in the dungeons for sure; our destiny wilt beest but soft decaying down thither until death showeth us mercy.”

“I don’t care. Allow me to prove all I would doth for thy love and for thy handeth, Y/N. I wilt taketh care of thee, I wilt at each moment maketh sure thee hath't everything thee couldst ever needeth and moo. And we wilt beest together, beest free to love one another at last. Who is't cares whither we art or what our fates wilt beest? We can finally beest together without restrictions, punishments or secrecy.” He presses you further up against the wall, lips parallel to your ear. “Mine life isn't worth living if 't be true thou art not by mine side. Wilt thee runneth hence with me?”

Simply just the thought of that makes your stomach go a flutter, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips. Your eyes flicker up to meet his once more, hands cradling his handsomely carved face.

“I trust thee, kylo, thither's few or none will entertain it path thee decideth to taketh; I wilt remain by thy side. If 't be true thee wish to telleth the kingdom, then I wilt telleth those folk 'longside thee. If 't be true thee wish to runneth hence from this lodging, then I wilt runneth with thee.”

Kylo pulls you close for one more embrace, then guides you along back up to the party. Acidic nerves begins to crawl up your throat as the two of you draw nearer and nearer to the bustling ballroom.

Instantly, the Queen rushes over to her estranged son with a frustrated frown on her face. “Whither on earth hath't thee been?! Thy bride hath been by herself all night waiting for thee to returneth!”

He takes your hand. “The lady is not mine bride, mother, not anymore. Y/n is mine bride, and we don't care what everyone thinkest of our forbidden love. I've grown did tire of trying to prithee, of trying to followeth all of the traditions of our family. I wanteth to marry for love, not for the continuation of our lineage, and i intend to doth so with mine beloved.”

Now, people have begun to look onto the unfolding situation, finding it far more interesting than the festivities. Leia’s eyes search her son’s, then flicker over to glare into yours. A shiver swipes down your spine at her gaze of hatred.

“Thee've poisoned mine son. Callet!”

This gets the attention of even more patrons and suddenly, every single set of eyes are focused on where you stand. You wish to simply crumble in this moment, become one with the Earth in order to escape their accusatory stares. 

“How dare thee speaketh of mine beloved in such a manner?! Didn't thee heareth what I did doth sayeth? We don't care what thee bethink of us, what any of thee bethink of us. We wilt beest together, coequal if 't be true 't doth take every single moment of mine life to achieve.” 

The room is completely still and scarily quiet, not a single shift in position or breath can be heard in this moment. Leia stands up straight to look up into her son’s eyes. “I at each moment did knoweth thee wast nev'r did cullionly to beest in this family. I'm ashamed to hath't thee as a son.”

Patrons begin to stir and an angry unrest drapes itself atop the crowd.

“Throweth those folk in the dungeons!“ One says.

“Death to the coronet prince!“ Another exclaims.

From the very back of the room, another voice pops up. “Traitors!“

Suddenly, Kylo yanks you towards the stairs, breaking out in a full sprint.

“Runneth anon, mine love! We wilt hence!”

Your precious shoes fly off your feet as you run behind him. “Kylo! Mine shoes hath't cometh off! What am I to doth?”

He’s quick to scoop you up and carry you in his arms, breath steadily growing heavier with your added weight. He runs all the way down to the stables and seizes a tacked horse, mounting the perplexed creature swiftly.

“Taketh mine handeth. Doth not fear, for our future awaits, mine beloved.”

With a bright and hopeful smile, you take his hand willingly, the wind catching your hair as rhythmic hoof-falls carry you off to your new life, one you get to spend with the love of your life.

[hezuart]

That anaversary aizen looks absolutely fabulous, he looks like a figure skater xd.

I heard along time ago the last arc of the anime was being animated finally bc they pulled a 90s sailor moon were the last season was not either animated or dubbed untill decades later.

I recall near the end of the current 366 episodes there was an episode were the creapy demon ppl woke up in hell and we're all bitter, and there was the other guy who was like, iM cOmEiNg FoR u IChIgO, but then is never mentioned again after and I'm like,why? Why is lt there just plopted randomly into a different arc that seams unrelated.

And locking aizen up underground seems ok, but It deff won't hold, and he will. Escape, and he will kill, you either need that one spell from star, dubbed, the darkest spell of moon the undaunted, a powerfull dark spell that killed immortal beings, that came from best character, eclipsa, the queen of darkness.

We need that.

Or stick him I'm crystal like eclipsa was in star. Is there no one who could trap him in ice or crystal for all eternity.

How about throw him into the centre of a volcano trapped and caged , forverr being killed by heat?

I assume there's space travel, send I'm into a black whole, were a black whole don't fuckin care if your immortal or fat, you will die

:3

Yes, I love anniversary Aizen. His original octopus-butterfly hollow design was ugly so I'm glad he's back to being the fashion icon he is.

Locking Aizen up underground once is one thing, doing it twice after saying he got more powerful by just sitting there, and he escaped to battle the Quincy Soul King God... is another. I think he should have escaped at the end of the Quincy arc. That is the only feasibility.

I heard the anime is coming back for the Quincy arc as well, but because of COVID its probably going to be delayed. (I'm not gonna watch it until the Rain section of the arc then I'm dipping out. I'm only here for Zangetsu)

and funny that you mention that hell scene in the manga :)

-> spoilers for the new BLEACH 73 page anniversary chapter / thoughts/critique on it

So hey you had a premonition! Syazel .... returned? And his hole is outside of his body??? for some reason???

(I didn't understand the explanation or why / how that happens and what that means for the hollow)

And my friend and I were laughing because out of ALL the things. Kubo could do in this anniversary. He gave Syazel his dick back after going to hell. That is iconic. (that's where his hole was located, and now that its not on his body ... well...) This is the funniest thing Kubo has EVER pulled. Kudos to you, sir.

The entire internet is freaking out over Ukitake being in hell. Honestly Kubo has done far worse, and we've established that Soul Society is a corrupt system that hasn't changed, so I'm not surprised he would pull something like this.

At the same time, Kubo 1. cheated his audience. 2. continues to prove me right that he cannot bring himself to kill his characters

1. Hollows who have commit murder in their human life are sent to hell. Syazel and Aaorniero are two of these hollows, and yet, when they are killed, there is NO gates of hell scene. We see them there later in the hell chapter (which was more of a promotion for the fourth movie and I didn't believe it would hold any merit)

But the same goes for Ukitake. We never see the gates of hell take him. What, was hell late? Did hell's gates get lost like an uber before picking him up? It's bull. Withholding such vital information from your audience, not showing the gates of hell when they should pick up this soul IMMEDIATELY is ... I mean its a lie. Kubo lied to his audience.

2. Now we are told powerful shinigami are sent to hell when they die. First of all that sounds like a security threat. Wouldn't shinigami want revenge for that? Or attempt to escape? Why would they still hold loyalty after being sent to a prison of eternal suffering?

Also "Yhwach and Aizen" were the only ones keeping Hell's gates closed is way too convenient and doesn't really make any sense. I feel like Aizen should have deliberately gone to hell to retrieve powerful shinigami / hollows for his army instead of keeping it /closed/.

This is definitely a Kubo-doesn't-know-what-he's-doing-and-is -making- stuff-up-as-he-goes, but it might have a pinch of merit because of previous plot lines.... but either way, there's some big plot holes here, but again, its Kubo, so I expected nothing less.

Again, he can't kill off his characters. He introduced zombification, he introduced immortality through the hougyoku, he has Orihime and Hachigen's reversal / rejection abilities. He brought back Luppi, friggen.... a character who's entire upper half of his body was incinerated. Like.... come on. No. He's dead, you can't bring him back like that. That's a cop out and just weird. You're taking away consequences and grief.

(Also Yamamoto and Unohana deserve to be in hell far over Ukitake, they've done some fcked up stuff in their pasts unlike him)

Also Kubo's favorite character is Mayuri, which.... you're allowed to have a favorite problematic character. But Keeping said character alive and bared from the consequences of abusing his daughter, murdering innocents, and experimenting on your own squad members? Nah. Nope. Kill him, Kubo. Kill this dude.

(his weird attachment to Mayuri is probably why he keeps bringing Syazel back, since Syazel is Mayuri 2.0, but Syazel is the bad guy who does face consequences for his actions while Mayuri is not)

~

Also, I'm certain Kazui and Orihime are going to be THRILLED that their precious husband/dad is going to hell when he dies :)

(I just... Rukia teased Ichigo about leaving Orihime at home. She teased him about having a house wife who he leaves all the chores to. Orihime had two panels. She checks on her son who promised he would be at home and sleep. Kazui fcking breaks his promise like it never mattered to him and JUMPS out the window after pretending to sleep in front of his mother. ... An 8 year old... alone... in the middle of the night.)

Orihime is abandoned. She is not invited to SS, she is not informed of what is going on, her son leaves her.... I...

Orihime is a side character. She doesn't matter anymore. She hasn't mattered for a long, long time.

A part of me is glad she had little screen time, since she tends to waste it, but another part of me is embroiled with rage.

I've even see people try to defend this. "Orihime and Ichigo can't be together ALL the time, that's an unhealthy relationship!" and I'm like guys... that's not the point. The point is Orihime is not part of Ichigo's other life. Any shinigami stuff from now on is none of her business. She's going to stay at home while Kazui and Ichigo go off and save the world. Ichigo is going to be fighting by Rukia and Renji while Orihime watches from the sidelines, or worse, doesn't even know what is going on with her husband and son. Orihime is going to be uninformed and abandoned, because she has not proven she is capable of fighting by their sides(go on, @ me. I will fight this. She's a failure.), and also because she prefers a human life over a dead one. Which is ironic, because she married a dead man. Ichigo is a shinigami, and he will be one forever. god forbid she ever meets his Zanpaktou. She would tremble in fear at the monsters her husband harbors in his soul, especially when she realizes they don't care about her and would rather see her dead. (Zangetsu would absolutely kill Orihime. Not sure about Kazui, but Orihime has not accepted Zangetsu, she does not like either of them, and the feeling is assuredly mutual.) frick now I want to make a comic about this

Also still frustrated over Zangetsu's shikai / bankai regression. Kubo once again lied to his audience. Ichigo has no bankai. How ridiculous is that? The main character of BLEACH doesn't have a bankai. Insulting.

(RIP to Chad. He doesn't exist anymore. He's just gone. No mention, no cameo. Gone.)

Kazui is a demon child. That character from the novels? Hikone? They're the same character. Literally same personality, same power level. Its worse because Kazui is a liar. He constantly goes behind his parents' backs. He can summon creepy fish and creepy eyeballs and open portals like is ANYONE aware of this? How has SS not kidnapped Ichigo's son and experimented on him / locked away his powers yet? All substitute shinigami require a reiatsu controlling / spy badge to keep them in line. Where is Kazui's? Or is he just a weird fullbringer?

I was worried Kubo was gonna try and pull a knock off Boruto but luckily he kept the focus on Ichigo and the others. But that being said, Ichika and Kazui are now just... sort of there? Kazui was kinda just.... having his own adventure that doesn't matter to the plot at hand, and Ichika had some nice characterization at first but she just hid behind her dad the whole time.

I have a feeling Kazui is gonna step in at the last minute or do some major behind the scenes thing that indirectly interferes with the main plot so no one will realize how powerful and dangerous he actually is. Its sad because Ichika is the superior character in personality and likability, but she clearly is not going to have a bigger part in this.

Ichigo having a normal life after everything still feels extremely boring and uncomfortable to me. Everyone's like 'I'm still bLEACH!" but.... BLEACH just... doesn't feel like BLEACH anymore. It hasn't for a while now.

~~~

There's two new shinigami characters. Didn't care for the girl, but the Sign Language kid who talks to animals is adorable ... however... he just reminds me of Chad, and I just... it hurts knowing Chad has essentially been deleted. Chad and Orihime are officially benched. They have chosen the human world, and Orihime has given Ichigo his spawn so she has no more use/purpose to him anymore... ////sigh

~~~

Also. This is claimed to be a new "arc". So is the BLEACH manga coming back? What is happening. I thought Kubo was tired and didn't want to do BLEACH anymore. I thought Shounen Jump cut him off. People made so many excuses for Kubo and why the past two arcs have been so badly written the past 6 years and now almost everything they've attempted to defend him with has been revoked.

BLEACH is going to continue to screw up its plot lines and characters, so Its probably best for it to stay dead but I've seen a lot of Kubo stans drooling over this content, they're desperate for BLEACH's return, but its already given out all its possible revelations. There's really nothing else to top here. It's just going to make things up as it goes along ,and I'm not really here for half-assed writing like that, especially since the damage of rushing the previous manga has already been done. Kubo and Shounen Jump are riding off a money nostalgia. None of this was planned.

Honestly though.... overall feeling of this chapter, not as bad as it could have been.

Syazel stole the spotlight, and he's my friend's favorite character, so that's all that really matters.

[cyncerity]

👁👄👁 can I ask for anything with naga Phil au?

I TOLD YOU I WAS ACTUALLY WRITING IT!! >:)

Anyways here the long awaited naga!Phil noms

Tw: vore, digestion mention, angst, swearing, puke mention

Phil turned to look at the food that Wilbur had gone out of his way making. Honestly, it all looked really good, for it just being pasta, the only food Wilbur could make. After Phil had been, well, shrunk, he couldn’t do what he needed to do for his family, like making dinner, so his sons had taken up his jobs around the house. Though it made Phil sad that he couldn’t do everything he needed to for his sons, he was grateful that they could at least take care of themselves without burning the house down or killing one another.

Phil subconsciously moved to slither up a leg of the table to get to the food and to get on level with his sons. He saw Techbo getting dishes out, Wilbur continuing to stir pasta in a pot, and Tommy being an unhelpful gremlin as per usual. The tiny naga smiled as he moved through the table to get to a ramp that led him from his current position to the top of the cabinets near Wilbur, who was talking to Techno and doing his best to avoid Tommy’s shenanigans.

He almost got up when Tommy suddenly bumped the counter, sending Phil tumbling down without the time to even scream before he fell into the pot that Wilbur was stirring. He couldn’t even yell out to Wil since he was still talking to Techno, who also apparently didn’t notice Phil almost drowning in noodles.

Finally, after what felt like hours to Phil, the stirring stopped, leaving him buried in noodles. He tried fruitlessly to slither his way to the top of the pot, and just as he got close, he felt himself being lifted very quickly with…a spoon maybe? It was hard to tell before he was dumped in a bowl and then quickly covered with even more pasta as he heard Tommy say something about going to his room. Suddenly the surface he was in was moving and swaying slighlty, and he could hear the feet of his youngest moving beneath him as Tommy ran to his room.

The bowl was soon layed on an uneven surface that Phil could only assume was Tommy’s bed. Phil managed to grab the edge of the bowl and peer over side just in time to see Tommy turn up the volume of his phone, which was propped up against his sheets and playing some sort of cereal video. But even with the volume almost all the way up, Phil couldn’t hear a sound out of the phone.

It dawned on him that Tommy had earbuds in just to late, as in the time it took for him to process that information he felt himself be pulled back under the noodles as his tail was forcefully twisted around cold metal, leaving Phil unable to escape what he now unfortunately realized was a fork.

Tommy didn’t take his eyes off his screen for long enough to realize that Phil was stuck to his utensil, and he didn’t hear Phil calling out to him. Tommy just slipped the fork into his mouth as Phil screamed in terror, and slipped the newly emptied fork out just as quickly, leaving Phil no escape. Phil made a move to try and pound on the teeth that surrounded him, but they quickly re-opened just long enough for Tommy to fit another mouthful of spaghetti. Tommy barely chewed the food, which Phil would have been more disappointed with had it not been for the fact that if Tommy were chewing, Phil would more likely be crushed to death, before swallowing to make room for more food.

Phil barely had time to get used to the unbearable humidity of the mouth before he was sucked tail-first down the throat. In little to no time the only part of him still in the mouth was his torso, and Phil could feel exactly where the sphincter tightened around part of his tail, and he could feel the part of his tail that was already in the stomach, since it was the only part of him that wasn’t being constricted at the moment besides his upper body.

Phil made every move in his power to scream and claw at Tommy to let him out. As much as it hurt him to try and use his claws on his own son’s throat, he didn’t want to die by someone he loved, and someone who didn’t even know that they were putting their father in danger. Phil continued to scratch at the mouth as he flailed the free part of his tail in the stomach against the walls back and forth as hard as he could, trying to use every part of him to alert Tommy that something was wrong.

He not only heard but felt Tommy’s stomach growl slightly at the movement from Phil’s tail and he heard Tommy start to cough, since having something stuck throughout his whole esophagus was making him feel sick. Phil’s hope sparked that maybe, just maybe, Tommy would at least accidentally cough him out.

That spark of hope was extinguished when a wave of soda came splashing at Phil, making his already slippery claws let go of the flesh surrounding him and sending him down into the hollow organ below.

A few antagonizing moments later and Phil was left curled up in Tommy’s stomach, trying to process what had just happened. He was in a stomach. And not just a stomach, his son’s stomach. Tears began to fall from his eyes as he realized that his own son would kill him, and wouldn’t even know what happened to him. His family would think that maybe he was eaten by some wild animal, or got stuck somewhere and starved. Maybe they would just assume he left them. After all, they wouldn’t have a body to confirm his death. Tommy would have digested him by the time they realized he was missing.

Phil began to coil in a circle around the stomach and against the walls in a motion that would have mimicked pacing if he still had legs. The longer he thought about it, the worse the scenarios that entered his head got. Tommy’s stomach rumbled loudly, probably from the fact that Phil had been punching against all sides of the stomach for a while at that point, and he heard a groan from above him and felt the wall against him press in, and that was all it took for Phil to pass out from stress and fear.

*******

Tommy pressed a hand against his stomach, which growled under it as he let out a pained groan. His stomach felt uneasy, like there some sort of uncomfortable weight in it, and he felt like throwing up. He wasn’t sure why, since he had just been fine, but maybe it was the pasta. He got up slowly to go to his brothers and get some sort of medication or something to settle his stomach, but was stopped by Wilbur before he could reach the medicine cabinet.

“Toms, have you seen Phil? I don’t think he got any food yet and I haven’t seen him in a while.” Tommy scoffed at Wil before turning back to his quest for some kind of anti-acid.

“Maybe Phil’s the lucky one, if he didn’t get any of your fucked up food yet. I feel like shit, big man, honestly. Like, I feel like I’m about to throw up.” Wilbur’s face shifted to concern as he looked Tommy.

“I don’t think it was the pasta. Techno had some, too, and he seems alright. Maybe you should get something to help you empty your stomach, you probably just ate to much.” Tommy nodded along. Honestly, it made sense to him. And it would explain the queasy feeling of something swaying in his gut every time he moved, it was probably just to much food. “Alright then,” Wilbur continued, “I’ll go get you a pill or something and you go get a bowl.” Tommy did as Wilbur said and they met back up in the living room, Tommy with a big metal bowl and Wilbur with a pill and a small cup of water. Tommy quickly took the pill from Wilbur and swallowed it down and Wilbur slid the bowl closer to Tommy as he noticed him start to look more sick.

*********

Phil slowly woke up looking around him to see he was…in something, and still surrounded in pasta. The walls around him were tall and shiny and cold, much cooler that the dreadful heat of the stomach. Metal. A metal bowl? How’d he get there?

As he became more and more conscious, he began to process that there was yelling somewhere above him, too.

“…well then how the hell’d he end up there?!” “I have no fucking idea, I swear!!” “How could you not know?!” “Are you trying to accuse me or something?!” “Would you both please calm down!!”

Phil knew those voices anywhere. His vision cleared enough to see Tommy and Wilbur engaged in a shouting match, and Techno trying and failing to calm them down.

Phil began to try and get out of the bowl when he was suddenly picked up out of nowhere and practically smothered with attention from his sons, all of whom were fretting over whether or not he was ok.

“I- Im fine…” Phil said, voice hoarse from the screaming earlier. He was soon lifted up higher towards Tommy, who he realized had picked him up. Phil’s face fell as he realized Tommy’s cheeks were lined with tear tracks.

“Phil, I’m so sorry, I don’t even know what happened, I didn’t mean to, I swear, I-“ “It’s alright, mate.” Phil interrupted, leaning forward and hugging Tommy’s nose. “It’s alright.”

He felt Tommy’s body begin to shake with slight sobs as he began crying again, pressing Phil into his nose gently with his hands. He turned his head to see Wilbur and surprisingly Techno join the hug, too, both relieved that Phil was ok. They were both horrified to see Phil unconscious in the bowl, and knowing he had been in Tommy’s…it was hard to think about. They were just glad he was ok. And Tommy was just glad he’d forgiven him.

And Phil was just glad that his sons still cared, even if he couldn’t be the best dad to them at the moment. They were still a family, and he’d never choose to abandon or leave them.