#mmmm chemical reactions

[ambitions-of-an-eccedentesiast]

yeah that must hurt- too late now ::)

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[daisukitoo]

Many species have more or less a spite reaction to being eaten. Very few species gain an advantage from being eaten. It is not a recommended career path. A common evolutionary path is developing some form of penalty for eating them, from the famous but biologically expensive "be poisonous" to lower levels of "taste bad."

The giraffe and the acacia tree are famously engaged in biological warfare, and one of the tree's tools against this tall predator is to signal downwind branches to pull out the tannin reserves. This makes the leaves taste bad. Tragically for the tree, giraffes have learned to dodge this tactic by eating into the direction of the wind, but you do what you can when you are a tree. The smell of freshly cut grass is also feebly trying to kill you, as anyone with bad allergies will explain.

Animals have a similar tactic. Those chemicals that flood us during panic also taste bad. "Fight, flight, and/or not be worth eating," as it were. This is a known factor in meat production. Painless, efficient kills lead to better meat; letting a fish suffocate in the air is bad for the fish, both in the usual sense of "bad for the fish" and also for the quality of the meat one presumably plans to eat.

Some of these tactics have drawbacks. Caffeine, nicotine, and capsaicin are natural insecticides. If a coffee bean can get your heart pumping, imagine what it does to a bug. But it turns out that humans like mild neurotoxins, so those make the plants more attractive to us. That ends up being an evolutionary advantage when we farm them massively. The better their evolutionary programming tells them to deploy weapons and kill the predators, the more we say, "Mmmm, spicy," and keep breeding hotter peppers. Some other species have been noted to enjoy mild neurotoxins, but they rarely engage in industrial-scale agriculture.

So when you read a story with a vampire or demon who feeds on human suffering, this should make perfect sense. They just happen to be a species that likes the flavor of our panic chemicals, and their torture dens are like coffee shops. Hunting humans for sport is just a natural, organic method of farming their equivalent of nicotine.

[circular-jerkular]

Not necessarily expecting you to know the answer to this but maybe someone who follows you does if you don't, this is the only place I know of to ask about this or even talk about it.

Do you or anyone else know anything about physical signs of sexual arousal while triggered?

I'm having one hell of a rough day, very dissociated so can't really tell what's up with me, just feeling physically awful and full of dread and anxiety but the confounding thing is that it seems like I'm sexually aroused as well and it's quite distressing not knowing why that is. I know "hyperarousal" is a thing with PTSD but this seems a little too literal? 😅

Unless that actually is all there is to it in which case...I guess 🤷

Thank you for everything you do Circjerk ^^

Hey! Sorry for the wait, literally forgot this ask came in-

First off, I need you to know how much joy it gave us to be called CircJerk. We are the circle jerk. It is us. (It made us laugh a lot, thank you)

Second off: Gonna put the sexual stuff under a cut on this one for my sake lol. The rest are cringing at what I'm writing.

It's okay to be horny while triggered. Like, right outta the gates, that's fine. For us, when we're triggered, it actually happens a lot. We've made sense of it in that... well, we're going through a lot of emotions, lots of brain chemicals and things, and BOOM, the chemicals cause a physical reaction.

Furthermore, we've been conditioned to see dangerous shit as sexy. That person who sexually assaulted me didn't just up and DO it one day -- she built up to it with more and more dangerous non-consensual acts, until the final moment, which made it more normalized for me so I didn't realize what it was until it was too late. Now, when I see shit that's clearly assault, it triggers me, because it reminds me of her -- but I get horny too, because I was conditioned to see that are good and sexy times.

I don't personally know a name for this kind of thing. I'll be honest, I grew up incredibly sheltered, and it's led to a lot of lack of education on sex stuff. It's something I want to read more on, especially in regards to trauma. At the end of the day, though, it is absolutely not a moral thing, and it's just a fact of life. Many traumatized people get horny when they're triggered, for various reasons. It doesn't mean you like the trigger or are horny for the abuse you faced; it means your body did the mmmm sexy things because your body does weird shit sometimes.

If other people know stuff about this topic, please, chime in -- I think that would be super helpful, especially as my experiences are only mine.

[ohheyidothat]

I will now liveblog me reading this because writing it down and then writing down my thoughts helps me process it, and I could use paper but I would wake up my wife with a light.

The nervous system regulates immunity and inflammation.

I suppose that makes sense. Most things are regulated by the nervous system--if not the brain, then the other areas of it (which relates to my theory of Somatic Cognition).

But I always thought the immune system was more mechanical than neural. Pathogens alert the immune system in the same way a key alerts a lock--by mechanically fitting into a slot. How is the immune system regulated by neurons? How do they communicate with the nervous system? Are they able to communicate via the blood, sending chemical messages long-distance? Are some immune cells solely created to ferry messages to neurons? Is there a part of the nervous system that is specifically designed to serve as a translator between the dutiful immune cells and the overseeing, entire nervous system?

The molecular detection of pathogen fragments, cytokines, and other immune molecules by sensory neurons generates immunoregulatory responses through efferent autonomic neuron signaling.

The molecular detection of...stuff...by sensory neurons generates a response. Mmmm :/ A response is generated when sensory neurons detect molecules such as pathogen fragments, cytokinesis, and other immune molecules (slightly rephrasing it to trick my brain into trying to comprehend it twice lol).

Detection of immune molecules by neurons generates responses through efferent autonomic neuron signaling >:/ Detection generates responses through efferent autonomic neuron signaling! >:3

What is "efferent autonomic neuron signalling?" Well, it at least includes the immune system's reaction to detecting molecules that warrant a response! I see!!

And these molecules can include pathogen fragments, from pathogens already partially destroyed or otherwise dead. It can include cytokines too. And others :3

The functional organization of this neural control is based on principles of reflex regulation.

Reflex regulation :0 I do not have this vocabulary term in my database. Also, why did they specify that it's the functional organization? As opposed to what? Theoretical? Oh, opposed to form! To structure! As in, the structural organization isn't necessarily based on the reflex regulation. The hardware and software aren't necessarily intertwined or similarly organized. Fascinating--i love to study boundary between form and function.

Reflexes involving the vagus nerve and other nerves have been therapeutically explored in models of inflammatory and autoimmune conditions, and recently in clinical settings.

Reflexes have been therapeutically explored for inflammatory and autoimmune conditions? :0 I'm not certain I've heard of that!

(Hmmm... Inflammation is definitely related to immune system stuff, but it feels closer to the nervous system for some reason... Is that based on knowledge I have, or just a random hunch? Oh! It's because *pain* is associated with inflammation, and pain is definitely neurological. Oh gosh, is it? I might be obfuscating some valuable nuances by assuming pain is not immunological.)

The brain integrates neuro-immune communication, and brain function is altered in diseases characterized by peripheral immune dysregulation and inflammation.

:O brain function is altered?? Did I know that?? That feels like novel information!

...Well, of course the brain can react to immune issues, right? There is a conscious reaction to being sick. A person can try to hide it to avoid negative consequences, or be open about it to receive care. That seems more like a conscious or subconscious choice than "brain function alteration," but I shouldn't trust any preconceived ideas without at least a cursory glance at the data source and associated logic.

I wonder if the SNS or PNS gets involved? It would make sense if the "something is dangerous, shut off all excess functionality and focus on survival" system activated; but equally I would think it logical if the "it's time to rest and recover and maintain homeostasis, time to employ the full body towards the task of life; digest things, heal wounds, use minimal energy to conserve it for tasks that increase longevity" system was in charge. I think I'll keep reading the article rather than looking it up.

Oh, I understand this next part and don't have any extra thoughts on it. I'll skip ahead to the next part I wish to spend extra time on.

Studying neuro-immune interactions and communication generates conceptually novel insights of interest for therapeutic development.

I sure hope it does!

:3 My brain has worked up an appetite. Snack time hehe.

[luhatev]

Risa: "Can i lick it..?" Calliope: "No?? Damn?? dont do that?" Risa: "But its yellow, what does yellow taste like?" Calliope: "Phosphorous? maybe??" Luna: "Mmmm, egg colour, yolk, egg flavor, omlette.. zzzz" Calliope: "Do you not see the red skull on the bottle?" Risa: "Im gonna do it-" Meanwhile Byakuya to Makoto:

Byakuya: "Theyre reagents, to put it simple, theyre used in experiments to bring out a chemical reaction."

He hears Risa behind him wanting to touch and lick the powder on the floor.

Byakuya: "Risa- stop, don't- tch whatever. How have you lived in such ignorance for so long?"

The sentence was aimed at Makoto but he was clearly still looking at Risa when he said it.

Byakuya: "I mean- makoto, it must truly be bliss." Byakuya: "What, you think studying science and mathematics has no practical application in the real world?" Risa behind him: "no." Byakuya: "Tch.. The words of a lifelong loser. Which, i suppose, suits you well." Aimed at both Makoto and Risa.

[cilldaracailin]

You’re My Best Friend

Hello my Tumblr Lovely’s

Happy Thursday :)

Here is the next part in this Robyn and Taron story :)

Love Suze xx

3

“The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.”

Robyn left him alone, going back to the kitchen and gave the floor where the tea had spilt a quick mop with her spray mop, making sure the floor wouldn’t be left sticky and then filled another cup for him and added milk and sugar, giving it a long stir. She thought about making him some toast but still wasn’t quite sure to how he was feeling, where his head was at, so just carried the cup back into the bedroom, leaving it on the bedside locker on his side of the bed. She wandered into the closet looking for him but he was back in the bathroom, rubbing his hair hard with the towel, standing in front of the mirror. Robyn leaned against the doorframe watching him. It didn’t feel strange to have him back in her home. In fact, it felt so normal to have him there, to see his things in her bathroom. She knew he wasn’t himself, that he was doing a very good job of keeping his true emotions in but even with that, it was so lovely to be back in his company again. She loved him and would do whatever it took to help him smile again, to hear him laugh, to just lift his mood.

“You like the view?”

His voice interrupted her thoughts. “Sorry?”

“You are staring at me.”

She half smiled and stood up, walking over to him. “Not a bad view at all.” She replied, trying to get a smile from him but his face was still lost. “You feel warmer now you are dressed?”

“Hmm yeah a bit.” He said as he reached up to rub his hair again with the towel. When he took it away, his hair was sticking up in every direction, the longer length so obvious now. He left the towel on the counter and used his hands to try to tame his hair, flattening it down. “It needs to stay this length till the end of the movie and then it needs a cut.”

“Just a trim.” Robyn said coming to stand beside him, looking at his reflection in the mirror. “A little trim.”

“You like my hair longer.”

“Hmm yeah.” She reached up to give his hair a little rub, smiling at how it fluffed up again. “It has its benefits.”

“True.” Taron agreed ready to close his eyes as he enjoyed the feeling of her hand in his hair but she took her hand down, his hair again messy and at all angles.

“I have something that will help.” Robyn said to him. “Come here to me.”

She walked away from him and into her closet, Taron following her. She pulled out a stool from under her mirror and patted it. “Sit.”

Doing as he was asked, Taron sat on the stool and waited to see what Robyn was up too and he found his lips lifting in a half smile as she held up her hairdryer. “Seriously?”

“Seriously.” Robyn nodded.

“Chicken…”

“You cannot to go bed with wet hair.”

“I go to bed with wet hair all the time. I come in from set, shower and crash.”

“Ok well let me rephrase that. You will not be getting into my bed with wet hair. You have never gotten into my bed with wet hair and we won’t be starting now.”

“That is such an old wives tale, about getting sick with wet hair.”

Robyn held up the hair dryer. “You want a cuddle?” She asked raising an eyebrow. “Because I am ninety-nine-point nine percent sure you desperately need a cuddle and you aren’t getting anywhere near me with wet hair.” Robyn gave the hair dryer a quick swing around with the cable. “It will take less than five minutes to dry your hair.”

Taron looked at her with wide eyes. “Really?”

“Yes really. You will not be comfortable trying to lay down with wet hair either and I just have this feeling it has been a shit few hours for you and you need to just get your head down and close your and eyes and rest and cwtch can’t get wet and you know he is waiting for cuddles.”

“Cwtch can’t get wet?” He questioned.

“Hmmm-mmmm because then he will have to be washed and dried and he won’t smell the same.” Robyn said, Taron seeing the slightest hint of red tint her cheeks. “And he smells really good.” She added. She held the hair dryer in her hands again. “So can I?”

“You want to do it?” Taron asked, again finding his lips trying to smile again as she stood in front of him in her short sleep shorts and tank top, looking adorable with slightly messy hair. It was just the simplest of actions from her that helped him forget about his last few hours, how the suggestion of her drying his hair could mean so much to him right now, how she was just being her usual loving self. She just knew to look after him in her caring but not appearing to care a lot way. He couldn’t have loved her any more in that moment then he already did. “Dry my hair?” He said again, this time his lips lifting in a smile, the first genuine one in hours.

“Well yeah, if that’s ok.” Robyn said, so glad to finally see his face in a smile. “I mean I know you can do it yourself and I am not Stephanie or Stella and probably won’t style it how you do it or like but I know you are tired and if you don’t mind, I would like to do it for you.”

As Taron sat on the stool, Robyn in front of him, nearly between his legs, in her cute little pyjama set and slippers, still not drilling him for any information about why he was there in her home, just looking after him and trying to make him smile and laugh, showing him nothing but love and care and concern, he was nodding his permission for her to dry his hair before he realised what he was doing.

“Great. Here hold this for me for a second.” She handed him the dryer and turning away from him, grabbed a brush from her vanity. “You mind?” She said to him holding up her brush. “Just to get any knots out.”

Taron shook his head and she stepped forward between his legs and very lightly and carefully, brushed through his hair, Taron dipping his head as the brush felt so nice against his scalp. While it wasn’t her hands, it still felt good and after his day of hell, it was a nice little bit of relaxation, his headache still lingering. When the brush left his hair, he was disappointed but knew Robyn couldn’t stand there all day brushing his hair and he found himself glued to her back as she rummaged through the drawers of the vanity, a tiny silver of skin appearing as she looked for something. It was the smallest peak of skin but it made his heart beat a little fast for a brief moment. She turned to him and held up a little white bottle. “Can I? It’s just some hair cream to help tame hair. No girly smell or anything and it just takes a tiny bit.” She saw his face fidget and stepped a little closer to him. “It will be like a tiny mini head massage for a moment.”

“Do it.” Taron immediately said to her. “Whatever it is, I don’t mind.”

Robyn laughed lightly as his quick response and squeezed a drop of the white hair cream onto her left palm, turning to put the bottle back on her vanity. She rubbed the cream between her palms and stepped back to Taron. Standing between his legs, she dragged her two hands through his hair, rubbing the damp strands through her fingers over and over a few times before letting her fingers start to scratch his scalp just concentrating on the top of his head, before moving nearer to the back, feeling him dip his head to let her reach, her thumbs getting behind his ears. Robyn knew the cream was well and truly rubbed into his hair after the first few seconds but she continued to scratch his head with her fingers, slowly making her way back towards his forehead. “And done.”

Taron sighed loudly, breathing in deeply as Robyn took her hands from his hair. “I think I have a head massage voucher in my wallet.”

“Those are free remember?” Robyn grinned as she took the hair dryer from him.

“Well, if I give you a voucher, I will get one right?”

Robyn gave him a slow nod. “Right…”

“Because that is how the voucher book works right? I give one and I can use it whenever I want, when we are together.” Robyn nodded again. “Ok then I will route out a head massage one later.”

Robyn kept his eyes as she looked at him, Taron actually keeping eye contact with her too and she didn’t know why she didn’t see it earlier. “Headache?” She said gently, reaching to brush his hair away from his forehead, resting her hand lightly on his head, so she could then rub her index finger up and down his forehead, stroking the skin between his eyebrows and down his nose a little, moving up and down a few times, being really gentle in her movements. “I can get you some tablets.”

“It’s just a light one but it’s been there a while and fuck that feels nice.” Taron closed his eyes as Robyn kept rubbing his forehead and his nose. “Forget the tablets, this will work.” His face frowned when Robyn’s fingers left his head but he saw her drop the hairdryer and step right into him, placing her two hands on head so she could now use her thumbs to rub his face in the same place but this time could put a little more pressure behind her movements.

His next curse was quieter but Robyn heard it and it made her grin and she concentrated on giving him a little relief from the pain in his head, treating him to a mini face massage, similar to what she had given him before. Flicking her eyes to the clock on the wall, it was just after half four in the morning and with the quiet in the room, she could hear the birds starting to wake up as dawn arrived early with the bright summer morning. Giving his nose one last stroke, she took her hands away from his face and bent down to pick up the hairdryer from the ground. “Let me get your hair dry and I am pretty sure this can be featured in the cuddle.”

“Please because I don’t know why but that always feels amazing.” Taron had no fear about admitting that to Robyn. He knew he could be upfront and honest with her in every way and the gorgeously soft strokes on his nose and head felt wonderful.

“I will still get you some tablets though. A massage can only do so much. Now…” She turned on the hair dryer. “Give me a dig if the air is too hot on your head, ok?”

“Sure.”

The noise was loud and a little irritating to his slight headache but Robyn slipped her left hand into hair, rubbing it back and forth as she held the hair dryer with her right and Taron closed his eyes, his hands resting on his thighs as she carefully dried his hair. Her movements were gentle and somewhat soothing and if the hum of the dryer wasn’t around his head, he would have enjoyed the treat of Robyn drying his hair that much more. He didn’t really think she was serious when she asked but he should have known she meant it when she said it. Robyn never ever failed to follow through with anything she promised him. It was another first for them and he hoped it would never be the last time she did this because Taron was feeling a little bit spoilt and in heaven as Robyn make sure he didn’t go to bed with wet hair.

Maybe someday she would admit it to him but right now Robyn would never tell Taron, that standing in front of him drying his hair was fulfilling every motherly vibe she ever had. It was just her natural nature to want to look after others, others she cared about, which was why she was so suited to her job of looking after children and looking after Taron had always been so important to her. She also loved playing with his hair, knowing he loved it too and how much it relaxed him, she was very happy to find something to calm him before he got into bed very much intending on continuing with his face massage too. She could still see he was still carrying so much tension in his shoulders and he was still filled with a lot of unease, so anything to give him a more restful sleep, she was willing to do. She hadn’t missed how his eyes were closed, his head a little titled back and hoped it was one more little thing to make him feel a bit better.

She started with her hands, just running through the wet strands, letting the hot air blow through, drying his hair as she went, trying to keep the dryer blowing his hair in its natural parting but after a while, she gave up with his parting and just ran her fingers from front to back, feeling the strands dry out pretty quickly. Taking a step back to her vanity, she picked up her brush and started to brush and dry his hair, seeing the colour change as it dried out fast. She ran the dryer around the back of his hair, giving it one more blast all over to make sure it was thoroughly dry, turning the heat to cool air, holding the brush under her arm, letting her hand run through his hair again.

Turning off the hair dryer, she placed the brush and hair dryer on her vanity and turned back to Taron who now had his eyes open. “So, it needs like some sort of setting cream right?” He asked.

Robyn smiled and then chuckled at his words. “Setting cream?”

“Yeah. To keep it in place.”

Robyn shook her head. “You are going to bed. It is going to be all messy anyway when you wake so what is the point?” She watched his face turn in a cute innocent look, finally seeing a glimpse of a giddy Taron, his eyes a little brighter. “Oh wait.” Robyn sat back on her wooden make up table and wiggled her fingers at him, hearing a very light laugh from him. “Well I guess, we can’t leave you unfinished.” Turning her back to him, she found the matching serum to hair cream she had used and squirted a little pump out onto her fingers. She walked back to him and after rubbing her fingers together, starting at his hair line, threaded her fingers through his dry hair a few times, not even pretending she was going to scratch his head again, this time going straight into a mini head massage for him, immediately going a little deeper with her fingers, hearing Taron’s appreciated moan.

He was so used to having his hair done by someone else. It was something that he could easily sleep through. In fact, he had slept through make up many times but with Robyn doing his hair, there was something so much more intimate and special about her standing in front of him, their legs touching as she make sure he was fully dry from head to toe before he went to get some sleep. He couldn’t quite explain why it made his stomach flutter, his cheeks flush, his heart race and his mind fill with thoughts he really shouldn’t thinking about but he went there very quickly and didn’t have one regret about doing so. They were wonderful thoughts if he was honest with himself, even more so after his shit morning and when Robyn finally took her hands from his head, he leaned forward, wrapped his arms around her back and rested his face against her stomach, so glad when he felt Robyn return the close hug with one hand on the back of his head, one between his shoulder blades.

It was a bit of surprise when Taron pulled himself into her, against her stomach for a hug but Robyn would never ever refuse him a hug and didn’t hesitate to hold him close against, finally feel a little heat to his skin through the back of his t-shirt. She was also really glad he had let her dry his hair. Despite what he said, he wouldn’t have been fully comfortable with a wet head of hair and they were only one step away from getting him snuggled up. She leaned down to give his head a kiss, keeping her lips on his hair, closing her eyes, enjoying the closeness with him. Since he had arrived in her home, it was the most peaceful she had seen him. Kissing his head again, she gave his back a rub and then felt him move from her.

“Sorry.” He said quietly looking up to her.

Robyn shook her head at him, now seeing a new tiredness in his eyes, a glimpse of his headache which was bothering him. “Why don’t you climb into bed and have your tea, which is probably cold.” Robyn’s face frowned. “I didn’t even remember your tea.”

Taron stood up and gave her a little smile. “It seems like I am not mean to have it.” He pushed her stool back into its place. “How about I go and add some more hot water to the cup and turn off the lights in the kitchen and you can turn off the lights here and the bathroom and we can meet at the bed.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

Taron walked out of the closet, picking up the cup from the bedside locker going into the kitchen to add some hot water into his cup of tea, testing the taste after he added some, satisfied it was hot and warm for him. Cup in hand, he switched off the lights in the kitchen and then the hallway, going back to the bedroom. Robyn walked out of the closet, closing the door behind her just as Taron closed the bedroom door.

“Fancy meeting you here.” She said to him as she walked around the bed.

“Fancy that.” He replied.

“I left two pain killers on the locker there for you. Please take them.”

“Thank you.”

Taron picked up the two white tablets and swallowed them down with a gulp of tea while Robyn walked around to her side and switched on the bed side lamp, kicked off her slippers and crawled onto the bed, Taron joining her on his side after he had turned off the main light. Robyn pulled the duvet up so he could tuck his legs in and once he was comfortable sitting up, leaning against the headboard, reached for cwtch and his cup, the dinosaur on his lap as he took another sip of tea. The security and familiarity of Robyn’s bedroom was mindboggling to him. The sense of relief quickly filled him, wonderful memories of all the times he spent in her room, helping him to further relax into the comfort around him. It also helped so much that Robyn had cuddled up into his side, fully covering his legs with the duvet. He slipped his free hand around her shoulders and she moved slightly into him but while he had been relaxed, suddenly she felt his body still and he turned a little to her.

“I didn’t even think Robyn.”

“Think about what?” She asked him.

“You.”

“Me?”

“Have you already forgotten about your hospital trip? Fuck Robyn. I probably woke you from a sleep you desperately need when I came here without asking. These are your days to be recovering.”

“Definitely haven’t forgotten about my hospital trip.” Robyn looked to the corner of her room that still had a bunch of flowers and balloons from the man currently sitting in her bed. “I have a few reminders around me.” She reached up to hold his hand which was draped over her shoulder. “And you didn’t wake me. I was kinda already awake as the rain pounded against my windows.” She said to him softly. “And I have been doing nothing but sleeping and resting for the last week Taron. Believe me, I have caught up on a lot of sleep. I also haven’t really left my bed.” She linked her fingers with his as best she could. “Someone filled my Netflix with a lot of choices and has been quizzing me at any chance he can.” She moved a little closer to him so her body was leaning more against his. “I have told you a million times, you can come to my home whenever you want without an invitation and you will not feel one bit guilty for doing so. I don’t desperately need any sleep. In fact, of the two of us here, you are the one who needs the sleep, not me and as you already know, Doctor Kay was very pleased with my check-up on Monday. So how about you don’t worry your pretty little self about disturbing my sleep. While I hope you will get some sleep here with me, I always sleep well when I am with you.”

He didn’t have any words for her, but leaned his head in against hers for a moment, then took another drink from his cup. The silence he found himself in now was a different kind of silence to sitting in the car on the way here. It had been apprehensive and nerve wrecking, his thoughts running riot through his mind but now, while he knew he still needed to talk through everything with Robyn, for the moment, he was able to just sit in her company and forget. Her presence calmed him. Her body kept his warm and he felt so safe with her.

Robyn took his quiet as an agreement in not mentioning her sleep again and giving his fingers a little squeeze, she let go of his hand and leaned into his side again. Their comfort was interrupted by a ringing phone, the tone echoing through the closed doors of her closet and bathroom.

“My phone.” Taron’s head hit the head board with a little frustration. “It is in the bathroom.”

“I will get it.” Robyn said starting to move but Taron kept his arm around her shoulders. She turned to him as best she could. “I am guessing it is someone from set as you said you would call your mam tomorrow.” She heard the woeful groan he made. “Let me get it.” She said to him again. “If it is someone from set, they won’t stop ringing until you answer.”

“Yeah alright.” He sighed, taking his arm away from her shoulders.

Robyn stood up, carefully stepped between his legs and then jumped off the bed and onto the floor, going straight for the bathroom and his phone which was sitting beside the sink. The phone stopped just as she went to pick it up but as predicted the phone rang right away, ‘Matthew’ on the bright screen. She answered but didn’t get a chance to say hello as the man on the other end of the phone went right into a rant.

“You got out of the car? In the middle of the night? In the pouring rain? What the hell were you thinking? Jesus Christ Taron, I thought you had more sense than that. Granted I know you probably weren’t thinking straight after being so distressed by the pool work but fucks sake Taron, anything could have happened to you on the way to her. Taron? Taron, don’t go all silent on me now.”

“It’s Robyn.”

It took Matthew a few seconds to speak again. “Aww shit Robyn, sorry.”

“I wish everyone would stop apologising to me.” She said as she leaned against the sink.

“I thought it was Taron. I am guessing he is with you seeing as how you answered his phone.”

“Yeah, he is here.”

“Is he ok?”

“Well, I am still trying to figure that out but as far I can tell he is in one piece.”

“He hasn’t told you what happened?”

“Not yet. He left the car?” Robyn asked. “Though when he got to my door, he was soaking wet so that actually makes sense.”

“Fucking idiot.” Matthew swore. “He got out at the bus stop and told the driver he would walk to yours.”

“What happened Matthew?” Robyn asked. “He hasn’t told me anything yet.”

“He will tell you.”

Robyn sighed. “Yeah, I know but I would like a little insight so I can be prepared as to whether I need to hug him, cuddle him or drown his sorrows with a beer.”

“Probably all three.” Matthew replied with a light laugh. “I am guessing you have figured it out for yourself though.”

“Re-shoots at the pool.”

“Got it in one. Let’s just say, he wasn’t ready to go back to re-shoot any water scene yet. He was completely flustered and panicked.”

“Fuck…” Robyn muttered.

“I asked him many times if he was ready Robyn. Every day. Told him they could wait until the end of the shoot but he told me he was ready and you know how stubborn that man can be. I should have told him no. I should have known it wasn’t as easy as that. I have worked with him for so long, I should have been able to tell he wasn’t ready. I just…”

“Matthew…” Robyn interrupted him. “He rang me earlier and he sounded absolutely fine. Taron is an actor and can be pretty convincing when he needs to be and he probably thought he was ok until he got to the water but didn’t want to let anyone down by saying so. He always carries the pressure of the movie on his shoulders and wanted to get it done and done right especially because the first time around, well it didn’t end so great.”

“True but I still should have known.”

“Yeah but these were very unusual circumstances and no one knew how he was going to react.” Robyn looked to the opened bedroom door. “Do you want to talk to him?”

“Not now. Leave him be. He’s ok though right?”

“Yeah, he seems to be. He is here, dry and is settled in for the night for some sleep, hopefully and tomorrow I will have a chat with him.”

“Will you please make sure he knows that I got all the scenes Robyn. That calling a halt to the filming hasn’t implicated the movie at all. I know that he will be fretting over that.”

“I will tell him.”

“And you know the hug, cuddle and beer wouldn’t go a miss at all as well as the chat.”

Robyn nodded into the phone. “I will look after him.”

“I have no doubt about that. You have him until Monday.” Matthew informed her. “Lyndsey has already sorted out his flights. She will give him a call herself.”

“Thank you Matthew.”

“No thank you.” The older man said sincerely. “I don’t think you actually realise how much you mean to him; how important you are to him. I am so glad you have been here for him during this shoot.”

Robyn nodded again. “I think you already know the feeling is mutual. You sure you don’t want to talk to him?”

“No let him sleep. It’s the best for him to just try and sleep. Tell him to give me a call though before Monday.”

“Yeah I will do.”

Robyn ended the call and turned his phone to silent. While she would have loved to have turned his phone off completely, doing so would worry anyone who tried to contact him who didn’t know what had happened, so instead she left it on but in a way it wouldn’t disturb them but someone could just think he was busy with work, leaving him a voice mail if needed. Grabbing his wallet, she made her way back into the bedroom, closing the doors behind her. When she turned around, Taron wasn’t sitting up in the bed but laying down on his side, his back to her as he curled up, the duvet bunched up at his feet. She put his phone and wallet on the bedside locker, beside the cup of tea which was half full.

“You heard that yeah?”

“Hmmm.” He replied, his voice muffled.

“Matthew is just worried.” She said to him, no reply coming. She could see his back rising and falling as he breathed in and out, no other movement coming from him. “Ok shove over.” She stepped to the edge of the bed and placed a hand on his waist. “Come on rocketman, move over.”

“This is my side.”

“Yeah, well someone needs a voucher fulfilled so moving over will really work in your favour right now.”

Taron didn’t look at Robyn but he felt a tiny smile on his face and he shuffled forward on the bed, moving into the middle, still curled up and his smile grew as he felt the bed move, Robyn climbing in behind him.

She reached for the duvet and tugged it up and over his legs and hips, covering his waist and side, only laying down herself when she was sure he would be warm and covered. It was so easy to cosy up behind him and with how low he was laying on the pillow, she had no trouble in wrapping herself around him, curling her legs into his and tucking his head under her chin, her right arm finding his hand which was in front of his face. The last time they had lay like this, it was because she had had a terrible day and now the tables had turned and Taron was the one who needed the comfort and support and a closer cuddle. It felt so natural to be so close to him though, to finally feel a warmth to his body and Robyn closed her eyes, breathing him in as he lay still.

Taron considered his voucher filled from the moment Robyn lay in behind him and tucked him into her body. Anything that came after that was an incredible bonus to him and as Robyn really held him close, he had to remember to breathe for a moment. It was the safest he had felt in such a long time and after his day of uncertainty, nerves and anxiety, to feel so safe and secure was indescribable. It felt so right to be held in her arms and he felt so loved, so at home.

Robyn had closed her eyes but opened them again as she remembered she had left the light on before she got into bed with Taron. “Dammit.” She cursed. “The lamp is still on.”

“Leave it.” Taron said. “If that’s ok. Let’s leave it on.”

“Sure.” She replied. “Means neither of us have to move.”

“Sounds good to me.” Taron answered her. The thought of being in Robyn’s dark room was horrible so he was glad of the light source. Her black out curtains always kept the room pitch black so even if the sun was rising with the dawn, Robyn’s bedroom would still stay dark so having the light on at the moment was something Taron knew he needed. While he was engulfed in a cuddle of comfort, he wasn’t quite ready to be in the dark just yet.

“Try and sleep Taron.” Robyn said into his hair. “Even if you don’t sleep, just close your eyes and rest. I will be right here with you for as long as you need.”

Taron flipped over their hands that were cupped in front of his face and gave the back of her hand a kiss. “Thank you Robyn.” He closed his eyes, moving a little to be perfectly comfortable, feeling Robyn adjust herself to his body and he sighed a little. He didn’t know if he would sleep so he lay keeping his focus on her thumb as it gently rubbed up and down the bottom his palm of his hand.

[bloodscourge]

My girl is out here being like mmmm exothermic chemical reactions.

[ellsey]

Agents of Shield Rewath 6x06 Inescapable

I KNOW WHAT THIS EPISODE IS SUCKERS

Legit I’ve rewatched it multiple times, so I’ll either have way too much to say or nothing idk

Jemma! Fitz!!!

Together at last yaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy

I love this happy reunion legit I want to cry so much

Hahahaha Fitz’s reaction at Jemma having seen the future

Fitz, honey, it was not worth it

Atarah is hair goals

I think Jemma is concerned about having every memory shared for obvious reasons

“Thought she’d never leave” haaaaaaaaahahaha Fitz has one thing on his mind

And it’s proposing marriage

PROPOSAL #3

We’re so blessed y’all

This is the most adorable mind prison tea party ever

BOO MONOLITHS

Sorry I am prejudiced against monoliths now

FITZ’S SCREAM AT SEEING WEE JEMMA SIMMONS

Jemma’s childhood room is exactly what i would expect from her

She’s really into butterflies yo

“I’m not afraid. I’m observing. From a distance.” Hahaha

And then Fitz’s little smile UGH

I WANT THIS BOOK

Well, not the Darkhold

“She’s 7.” “And a half” That’s so real though

Fitz is so ready to be a dad hahahahaha

“You’re back good don’t be mad” Hashtag they’re somarried

NOOOOOOOO Fitz doesn’t need to see this

I do understand how difficult this would be to tell Fitz about though, but also Jemma you didn’t consider this once during the year you were looking for him?

IAIN AND LIL DESERVE EVERY AWARD AVAILABLE GIVE IT TO THEM NOW

It’s amazing that it’s Coulson’s death that really breaks Fitz. Seeing himself, learning he had been married to Jemma, had a whole life he didn’t know about was tough, but I think he was already figuring out how he could get through it. Finding out about Coulson though?? That was the last straw.

THE ACADEMY AHHHHH

“Is it? You should see my room.”OK....I mean, whatever if that happens, I don’t care”

HAHAHAHAHA HE IS SO IN LOVE WITH HER

“Like a thick wall” Fitz knows he’s immediately in trouble here

Legit there is not hiding how buff Iain has gotten

The onnnnnlllllyyyyyyyy thing that mars this episode is that friendzone line, but everything else is so amazing I’m willing to overlook it

But like, you know how I can tell a man wrote this episode?

Yep

Also I recognize the healing power of that hoodie

Any excuse to get Iain to work those suits mmmm

Poor Jemma is having a panic attack

And then Fitz quickly progresses from “Simmons” to “Jemma” indicating his rapidly escalating concern

Well that doesn’t look good

YOU BOTH NEED MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF THERAPY

Their mumbling going to meet Coulson is so amazing hahahaha

I love Fitz and Simmons but they really must have been holy terrors to have around

“She’s the part I’ll take last”

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP MY HEART

“YOU BUILT A ROBOT GIRLFRIEND” HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA 

This whole scene is so amazing but I can’t quote the whole thing

You’re yelling because you needed to work through all this Jemma

One thing I do want to talk about is this discussion they’re having about love and pain. The fact is all their pain came from the other person because they loved each other so much but couldn’t tell each other that. And that had probably been going on for years. I mean Jemma buried it deep with all her other problems and Fitz just straight up ignored it. So is it any surprise that their issues are now making out with each other?

Which brings me to my second point: knowing you need to share not only your joys but your pains. Again, Fitz ignores everything and pretends it’s not there while Jemma buries it all away. What will make them so much stronger though is talking about it. Knowing that the other person is going to save them or die trying in every instance. Get it all out there and talk about it!

This has been relationship advice with Ellsey. I am not qualified to give advice for anything, but I have been with the same person for 16 years ish, so I’ve got some long-term experience.

TLDR: Talk to each other. Share you feelings. Be in love. xoxo

“Fitz, we’re obviously made for each other.” *Fitz nods* I LOVE THEM

PROPOSAL #4

LET THEM KISS OMG UGH

“I have taken bold action” Yes you have bestie

“Embrace me” “Oh, I almost forgot, you’re a grandfather”

JEMMA ANNE SIMMONS NOOOOOOO

Awww Mack is so happy it makes me happy

Daisy stepping on Mack’s moment hahahaha

Ok this is already long, but I just love this episode so much. Absolutely genius storytelling weaving in and out of their memories like that. The only rating this episode gets is  ∞/10 on the Fitzsimmons scale. This is peak Fitzsimmons. I don’t know if it can ever be topped.

I’ve known since I started this rewatch what song I’d use for this episode. It’s basically my peak Fitzsimmons song, so I present to you “Philosophize In It! Chemicalize With It!” by Kishi Bashi.

[frecklefaceb]

Hide and Seek 4

Genre: Fan Fiction (Jack Reacher AU featuring Charlie) Pairing: Charlie x OFC-Mildred “Millie” Day Warnings: Language, Physical Violence, Verbal, and Death Rating: Mature Theme Disclaimer: This a strict work of fiction, I own nothing except the original characters and the plot line.

*So it’s been a very long time since I’ve posted anything on here. For those that need a refresher the previous chapter is here. I appreciate those that have checked in on me and the unspoken support in this awesome community.*

I hear distant conversations and the passing of vehicles as I slowly gain consciousness. Sleep had come easily, despite my embarrassing behavior and subsequent cold shower of shame. I moaned with my stretch before rolling over onto my side, near the edge of the bed, and the nagging protest from my heavy bladder finally convinced me it was time to get up. Peeling my lids open, I'm startled by the proximity of Charlie's face hovering at the edge of the bed, my legs and arms flailing as I scoot back with yelp.

"Oh, good, you're awake," he announces with a smile. I'm still gasping for breath and clutching my chest when he plops down a bag in my lap. I hesitantly open it to discover a box of hair dye and close the bag before running a hand through my hair.

"Your wakeup call could use some finesse," I grumble, sinking back into the mattress. 

"Mmmm," he hums. "Seemed sufficient enough to me," he reaches out, taking the blankets from the bed and I immediately curl upon myself with the chill of air. 

"Why are you like this?" 

"I just love makeovers," Charlie rebuts with a small smirk as he moves to lean against the dresser. I send him a glare as I stretch. Seeing him smile and make a joke was almost the equivalent of spotting Big Foot or seeing a unicorn, you're not sure if it's real or your imagination, and there's never a camera around to capture it for proof. 

"Try fixing your attitude," I sass, pulling the bag with me as I stand from the bed.

"I assume you can handle that?" He pointedly asks, while moving from the dresser to the small table with his laptop. 

Feeling slightly insulted, my only reply shutting myself into the bathroom. Outside, the chair scrapes along the floor and I hear Charlie murmur in another language. Shaking my head, I pull down my underwear and sit on the cold toilet seat, leaning forward until my fingers pull out the box of hair dye to read the instructions while taking care of business. My day had just started, but already felt as though it was dragging along, and unfortunately for me, there was no end in sight. 

__________

The reality of dying my hair never fully settled in until after I washed the remaining chemical out. The wet limp locks garnering my attention in the mirror, my usual reflection occupied with my replacement. Millie 2.0 was now sporting dark brown hair which was a stark contrast to my opposed to her natural sandy brown. The change was subtle, just enough to fly under the radar. I squeeze my hair over the sink one last time and quickly rub the towel along the ends before discarding it to the floor. I momentarily hesitate over its state of rest, Charlie exhibited a preference for order on numerous occasions and yet I continually leave it on the floor. 

I fling open the creaky door with a zealous, “Tah dah!”

Charlie’s eyes lift from the computer screen but he remains silent while studying me. My shoulders slump from the unsatisfactory reaction of my theatrical entrance and his uncomfortable scrutiny. 

His arms cross as he leans back, “We need to cut it.” 

“Fuck off.” My assertion has him bounding from the chair and bee lining towards me. I hustle to the bed and scamper across, hoping it’s a safe enough distance as his voice growls from behind. 

“I wasn’t asking.” 

My first reaction is to pitch a pillow, and he casually knocks it aside before it can hit him in the face. Determination sets in and Charlie rolls his eyes as I reach for the second. The warning call of my name reverberating as the pillow leaves my grip to take flight in his direction. This time he bats it away while stepping onto the bed and stalking towards me. I bump into the side table as I take a step back, and smile as I quickly open the drawer with the intention to heave it, but it sticks. The dresser rattles with each of my frantic jerks, and I realize the drawer was probably jammed in its track. The sound of Charlie’s feet meeting the floor feeds my desperation as I desert that drawer and retrieve the Bible that was comfortably tucked away in the next drawer. His hand tightens around my wrist before I can even attempt to toss it at him.  

“That’s not the way to spread the good word,” he dryly jests, the hinge of amusement only further rattling my nerves. 

“I beg to differ, because it’s pretty apparent you need Jesus,” my voice wavering as he smugly removes the book with his free hand. My mouth opens and closes as I fight back tears of frustration. Why is he so fast? It’s all too much. I feebly try to step away but he easily pulls me over to the desk and nudges me down into the chair, which was still faintly warm from his previous occupancy. 

“Braid it,” he orders, ignoring the silent plea of my tear filled eyes. My hands tremble as I comb the damp strands with my fingers before pulling the locks over my shoulder to weave into a braid. I secure the ends with a hair tie before looking up to discover Charlie idly waiting with a knife. 

Sensing my panic, Charlie’s fingers play with the banded end before pulling it taut and wielding the blade approximately midway through the braid. My eyes follow the braid as he tosses it in the garbage. It feels like an eternity passes before I can lift up out of the chair and make my way to the bed. To my surprise Charlie never speaks a word of protest nor does he bother to wake me for the rest of the day. 

_______

My head hurts, and I’m unsure if the annoying jackhammer sensation was caused by the unpleasantly warm room I’ve woken up to, or from crying but it was hostile. My legs feel like molasses as I slowly peel off of the bed and lumber towards a bottle of water sitting on the desk. I’m fairly certain it belongs to Charlie, but at this point I’m hot and  my insides feel like they’re shriveling, not to mention the unpleasant drumming in my head indicating dehydration. 

“The air conditioning is busted,” Charlie announces from the doorway. I slowly swallow, contemplating whether the door was open or if he is just that quiet? I shrug in response before downing the remainder of the water and crush the bottle in my hand. Charlie’s jaw tenses, annoyed with my action, and I only further the cause by tossing the plastic towards the trashcan but missing it. I shuffle to the garbage, sweeping it off the floor before he blows a gasket.  

“Do we have any ibuprofen,my head is killing me?” 

It’s no surprise that my plight has no effect on Charlie, who remains firmly planted in the doorway. 

 “You need to eat,” he barks and unfortunately for him, my eyes aren’t too distressed to roll in response. 

Charlie’s jaw ticks, annoyed with my childish behavior, yet he still manages to deliver a blasé, “Okay, then.” 

The robot of a man’s attention is drawn to his phone, and as if on cue my stomach rumbles. These next words were bitter as I spat them out, “You’re probably right. What is there?” 

His fingers typing furiously, and being ignored was fueling my irritation as I traveled to hangry town. “Hello! Earth to Charlie!” 

“Figure it out yourself. I’ve got to do something.” And just like that I watch Charlie dart to his car then leave. 

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” I scream. 

___

"Where's mine?" I question, eyeing the ice cream cone in Charlie's hand. It looked like a rocky road, I didn’t peg him as a chocolate and marshmallow type, but then again, we didn't meet under normal circumstances. 

After the earlier frenzied departure, Charlie was gone for nearly 3 hours. I attempted to watch tv but it was too hot to focus, and then there was the fact the door was open. Freedom was openingly mocking me. A few strides and I could vanish, at least I’d like to think so but the reality is Charlie could easily find me. I proceeded to imagine all the various scenarios until he reappeared with an ice cream cone. 

"What? This?" He teases as I observe the slow and intentions swipe of his tongue, catching the droplets of melting chocolate. "I wasn't sure if you even liked ice cream," he adds with a shrug, breaking my trance.  

"It's ridiculously hot and you didn't bother to ask," I pout, trying to pretend it was just about ice cream. This was premeditated, I was sure of it. Our air conditioner was broken, the pool had already been drained for the season or I'd be in it, and now I had to watch him sensually lick an ice cream cone after making a mockery of me the night before. Both the universe and Charlie were ridiculing me. 

As if reading my mind, Charlie replies, "You were pretty hot last night and if I'd taken you up on the offer we'd be having a much different conversation this morning. Which embarrassment do you prefer? Knowing I stopped it from happening, or letting it occur and you being stuck with me after being used?" 

I wanted nothing more than to slap the cone away from that smug bastard as he takes another bite, the crunch grating on my already agitated nerves. Unable to bear the sound and his scrutiny any longer, I stand, waiting until I was nearly back into the room before yelling, "Fuck off." 

I immediately regret the decision upon entering our room, the open door offering no relief. It feels like an oven but I refuse to go outside and endure more belittling from Charlie. As I settle on the bed, he props himself in the door frame with his arms crossed. 

"You're going to make yourself sick." 

"I'll take my chances," I grumble, slinking down into the bed and pulling a pillow over my face. 

"If you're going to insist on lying about(,) you should at least shed a few layers so you won't overheat." 

I uncover my face as I move back to a seated position, "You first." Charlie's brow arches with my sneer before reaching behind his head then yanking his shirt up and over. I catch my mouth as it falls, his abs were something out of a magazine. While his face remained stoic, his eyes were dancing with amusement over my reaction.

"Do you need help?" he teases. I defiantly step off the bed to pull my shirt off, letting it fall to the floor next to my feet as I confidently look down my nose at him with my hands on my hips. Charlie’s gaze falters, trailing down my exposed flesh. There was something equally exciting and unnerving about the way he was looking at me. Enjoying the rush, I drag my thumbs along the top of my shorts, stopping at the button. Charlie licks his lips, as his eyes meet mine with silent encouragement. 

Just as I pop the button, I notice the repairman over Charlie's shoulder. "Oh, Jesus, Charlie!" I hiss before scooping up my shirt. Charlie turns, practically running into the man.

"Hey! My names Guy and I'm here to fix your unit?" Charlie steps aside to make room for Guy's passage as I dress. 

"Perfect timing," his retort dry, and I can't help but wonder if he meant it or was genuinely upset. 

[tagsecretsanta]

From Melmac78

To @cookidoughlilac

Secret Santa doesn’t own this piece, full credit to author above!

It was a rather balmy December 24 that year on the Pacific Coast.

The five brave men of International Rescue however weren’t enjoying that nice weather.

They were shivering as they wrapped up an oil rig rescue in the middle of the Arctic Ocean.

There had been a few close calls as they rescued the men on the leaking rig, but all of the victims escaped with minor injuries. The oil that had spilled was being vacuumed up quickly thanks to Thunderbird Four’s vacuums and a chemical compound Brains created to break down the oils to basic components.

They were tired, sore, irritated that there still were folks who didn’t know how to properly store the crude fuel, and worst of all - chilled to the bone from the temperatures.

Fortunately, at Tracy Island a duo was working to fix that problem…

********

“Now, the trick to making the perfect cup of hot chocolate Sally it to add puffy peppermints in with the marshmallows,” said Kip Harris as he added three of the sweets into the drink. He then handed the handmade clay mug to Grandma Tracy.

The pair had been working on making the perfect warming beverage for the brothers as they neared the island.

This was especially true after Grandma Tracy’s first try had her confuse baking chocolate with drinking chocolate.

Worse, she thought the chocolate needed a kick - and added a while habanero pepper to the mix.

Kip had fond feelings for the matriarch of the Tracy family… but admittedly the cowboy still wondered how he had taste buds after drinking that concoction.

Sally smiled. “I had wondered what you did to make it taste so good,” she said, accepting the gift, taking a deep sniff then a long sip. “Mmm… delicious.”

Kip chuckled. “It will be if you remember peppermints… not peppers,” said the Texan, laughing at her mock glare.

Shortly thereafter, they heard the ping of an elevator near the fireplace. “John’s here,” said Grandma Tracy, smiling.

“So is the love of his life going to be there,” said Kip with a mischievous smile. He has heard about Ridley O’Bannon and John’s handball games off and on during his visits.

She swatted the man on the shoulder. “Ridley is just going on a nice Christmas date with John. She doesn’t get many days off even at Global One,” she said as she walked over to the elevator. “You might want to make sure that you have two good strong cups of your special hot chocolate. They’ll probably be suffering space sickness.”

The cowboy, having witnessed some of the effects of gravity on John, including one embarrassing case of catching the younger man after he fainted, nodded and started work.

Shortly afterward, the elevator doors opened and the space weary couple stepped out. “John, Ridley it’s so nice to see you,” she said giving both a big hug before leading them to the lounge.

John and Ridley wearily sat down on one of the couches. “Thanks. It’s great to see you too Grandma,” said John.

Ridley also introduced herself to Kip, as both gratefully accepted the cup of hot chocolate from the elder man.

“Thanks Kip,” said John. Seeing Grandma’s nervously  glance at the mug, he took a cautious sniff then a sip.

Then he smiled. “Ah… and not chili…” he said wittily.

Grandma Tracy tutted. “Now, now, John… one time I put peppers in there...”

“Two,” amended Kip, much to the humor of the younger couple.

Ridley smiled. “Well, even if it was a hot chocolate with chili peppers, it would be delicious. Thank you,” she said, taking another sip of the beverage.

The group then chit-chatted about space, the recent rescue and, in John’s case, a story about how EOS had tried to learn “‘Twas the Night Before Christmas” in 10 languages.

John had to stop her when she had gotten halfway through the fifth take, confusing Japanese with Mandarin, causing her to repeatedly insist Santa’s belly “shook like a bowl of squawking kittens.”

During their chat, Lady Penelope contacted the island, saying that she and Parker would be there within a couple of hours to visit and celebrate the rest of Christmas Eve with the family.

Sally and Kip however exchanged a knowing glance - there was one person they knew she really wanted to see.

About a half an hour later, the other brothers arrived and took their places on the couch, each grabbing their own mug from a tray that MAX was carrying.

Sally passed out blankets, knowing they all were cold from the arctic rescue.

She then heard the aquanaut yawn and smiled. “Tough day I see,” she said, wrapping a blanket around his shoulders.

“Yeah… I see why the whales are full of blubber,” he said, chuckling in memory. “I still think that humpback I saw was intentionally spinning around happily in that cold water to taunt me while I shivered in Four.”

Virgil rolled his eyes. “At least you didn’t have to swim in the water this time,” he said dryly.

“Yeah… don’t remind me,” said Gordon as he took a long sip of the chocolate. “Mmmm…. Thanks Kip.”

The cowboy shook his head. “No… that’s the batch your grandmother made,” he said. “Only John and Ridley got my batch.”

Gordon frowned. “Oh… I was looking forward to baking chocolate,” he said. Seeing Grandma Tracy’s disdain, he smiled. “No, this is a really good Grandma, but I’m serious. Anything warm was going to be good. Besides, it’s still better tasting than Scott’s coffee.”

The eldest snorted. “At least it isn’t as bad as the time you thought it’d be neat to try hot Dr Pepper with lemon,” he sniffed.

“Now wait a minute Scott. It DID open up your sinuses…”

Alan however laughed. “Along with half the island’s,” he said smiling in memory.

Gordon admittedly chuckled in concession and they drank in companionable silence for a time.

Kayo and Brains stopped in and took part in the miniature campout, enjoying the company as well as the light from the Christmas trees that adorned the center of the lounge.

They visited and shared stories about past Christmases, some funny, others touching.

Most of all, they counted their blessings that year. Each brother had a close brush with death that year, almost making this Christmas a sad time.

Scott and one of Fischler’s “genius” inventions.

Virgil and a case where Two suffered an engine failure after being clipped by one of the Hood’s missiles.

John a tear in his space suit, where his NASA training for spontaneous decompression gave him the crucial seconds to patch it and get to Five. That was when they all thanked EOS for being there, especially using her claw to drag him in with mere moments to spare.

Alan had a close call when micro-meteors punched a small hole in the cabin of Three in Space, causing decompression of the area.

Gordon… well, the less said about what the Chaos Crew and the Hood did to him the better. In fact, they hadn’t let him see all the footage of the old TB4 wreckage under the destroyed chimney.

That said, Gordon, seeing their reaction, decided it was better he remained oblivious of how close it really was.

Reliving some of his memories of the long recovery, Gordon shook his head to clear it.

The aquanaut then chose to tell a story about the time Alan tried to steal his sneakers, but wound up fainting from the fishy smell.

The youngest, seeing the realreason for the  embarrassing story, proceeded to pull his brother’s blanket over his head.

It worked: the mood lightened up again.

Gordon had recovered enough and had put Alan in a headlock, when a polite cough interrupted any further revenge.

Both looked up and blushed pinker than they rose colored jacket the young woman wore.

“I see that I missed the joke,” said Penelope as she and Parker made their way into the living area.

Gordon blushed even more pink as he removed his arm from around Alan’s neck. “Hi… I didn’t know you were coming Lady P,” he said sheepishly.

“I can see that,” she said, chuckling as she accepted a cup of hot chocolate from Kip. “Thank you Kip - I just adore your hot chocolate with puffy peppermints.”

Kip tipped his hat in thanks as he went to refill Sally’s mug.

Parker however cleared his throat. “Um… M’Lady, where do you w’hant me to put this,” he said, grunting slightly as he sought a better grip on the object.

Gordon saw what was in Parker’s hands and jumped up. “A Karaoke Machine? Here, let me help,” he said, readily relieving Parker of the items. The chauffeur grunted in thanks and accepted his mug from Kip.

As Gordon set it up, Scott, John and Virgil did a trio of facepalms. “Seriously, you’re going to let him sing Lady P,” groaned Virgil. “My eats just recovered from the last time.”

“Hey! I can sing you know,” said the aquanaut miffed.

“And Two can swim,” muttered Virgil.

John quirked an eyebrow. “Um… you have made her swim… and be a spaceship,” the astronaut pointed out with a chuckle.

Ridley looked at her date, confused. “Thunderbird Two has flown in space,” she inquired.

John nodded and started to explain when they all heard the Karaoke Machine squelch.

They turned to find a sheepish Gordon. “Sorry… had the microphone too close,” he said, and selected a song. “Lady Penelope, would you care to join me?”

Penny walked over with her beverage and looked at the song. “‘Blue Suede Shoes’? Gordon, that’s not a duet,” she said as she flipped to another song. “How about this one?”

“‘Anything you can do I can do better…’ OK? I guess?” said Gordon, confused.

The others were just as perplexed until the duo started singing.

Before long, there was laughter all around as the two sang the competitive song from “Annie Get Your Gun…” especially the point where they had to hold a note for a long time.

Penny could do many things - but none knew she could hold a note for a full minute without a breath. Gordon timed it.

Once that song was over, each of them took their own turns on the machine, singing all sorts of songs.

Kayo sang a beautiful rendition of “Winter Wonderland.”

Brains opted to not sing, if only because his favorite song needed Moffie in order to be appreciated.

Scott, Virgil and Alan all sang their own versions of “Blue Suede Shoes,” just to see who sang it best.

Virgil won.

Then John and Ridley sang a playful duet, culminating in John receiving a kiss on the cheek from Ridley.

It was the first time the brothers saw their brother’s face turn red.

Eventually it was time for bed, and after John had EOS continue monitoring for disasters, they all turned in for the night.

Afterall Santa - with MAX and Kip’s help, needed to come and fill their stockings.

They all had one wish however…

It was that everyone had a Christmas where they got to see their families and loved ones, not International Rescue.

[ask-jokeboi]

Dr. Crane, which rogues have you used as test subjects so far?

Crane: “mmmm not many, unless you mean on accident. Joker’s (enthusiastically) volunteered before though, curious about my toxin’s hallucinogenic effects. Unfortunately he’s not a very reliable test subject so I can’t use him as a control. his reactions are often minor and difficult to observe. I believe his physiology’s been altered somehow, odd chemicals in his blood floating around… interesting of course but… not very useful…

anyway tho, I may not get along with all my colleagues but I suppose I respect them too much to use them as lab rats unless they eagerly insist.”

[jumarit38]

THE THEORY OF LOVE - MAYUKI OS

[paper-lioness]

“Hey buddy, whatcha workin’ on?”

“It’s a project for school,” Xavier said, not taking his eyes away from the test tube.  “We’re learning about chemical reactions.”

“A project in your first week?  That’s what you get for being a smarty pants and moving to the advanced class.”  James knelt in front of the project, ignoring the popping sound in his knee.  “Can I help?”

“Mmmm.... I guess so,” Xavier said, finally looking at him only to wag a finger at him.  “But you have to be precise.  This is serious stuff.”

James fought to hide his amusement.  “Yes sir.  No funny business.  You just tell me what to do, and I’ll follow along.”

“Deal.”

[reitziluz]

get to know me meme!

..... a mutual did this and said people feeling up for it should do it so....

i’m not tagging anyone but feel free to do these

1. What is your full name? Rene

2. What is your nickname? Rellu, Rensku

3. What is your zodiac sign? Virgo

4. What is your favorite book series? uhhh ASOIAF maybe

5. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? i like the idea of residual energy... and ofc there’s other lifeforms floating in the endless space

6. Who is your favorite author? ME MYSELF i’m honestly not sure, there’s no-one whose all works like to the same degree 

7. What is your favorite radio station? ... rock/heavy metal station

8. What is your favorite flavor of anything? mmm choco? or like this salsa/cheese combo. also cola.

9. What word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful? excellent, gorgeous, fucking perfect

10. What is your current favorite song? this one

11. What is your favorite word?  i don’t... have one. maybe しまう?

12. What was the last song you listened to? this one

13. What TV show would you recommend for everybody to watch?  in the flesh, mushishi

14. What is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down?  i don’t like movies that much? ... one piece movies

15. Do you play video games? yes occasionally

16. What is your biggest fear? death, heights

17. What is your best quality, in your opinion?  insight/confidence combo?

18. What is your worst quality, in your opinion? arrogance... small-mindedness, as in not being able to throw myself as deep into stuff as i feel like i should....

19. Do you like cats or dogs better?  cats

20. What is your favorite season? winter or late fall

21. Are you in a relationship? mmmm when aren’t you in relationships?? but yea i’m in several relationships as this question seems to be angling for...

22. What is something you miss from your childhood? structure and relatively low pressure

23. Who is your best friend? poronen and also revy my dearie. there’s a couple more conventional/old past besties too that i still hold close to my heart.

24. What is your eye color? dark-ish gray-green-blue

25. What is your hair color? dirty blonde, dyed red

26. Who is someone you love? my friends my family my datemates... myself...

27. Who is someone you trust? i trust p much everyone until proven wrong

28. Who is someone you think about often? bisexualwinry and poronen again lmao, also... uhhh whichever characters i’m obsessed most recently

29. Are you currently excited about/for something? next installations of friends’ fics, my own fic chapter lmao, a homewarming party of an ex i’m friends with...

30. What is your biggest obsession? currently a couple vocaloid producers and mp100. long term.... ffvii and vampires.

31. What was your favorite TV show as a child? pokemon and moomins

32. Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone? fuck your idea of there being an opposite!! i don’t have an opposite!! i can tell my dearest friends anything, regardless of gender or lack of it!!!!

33. Are you superstitious? not really, tho i like some of the practices

34. Do you have any unusual phobias? no

35. Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? front~

36. What is your favorite hobby? writing, drawing, weightlifting

37. What was the last book you read? i’m not sure but i’m going to say villon’s testament

38. What was the last movie you watched? uhhhh maybe ghost in the shell? the first one.

39. What musical instruments do you play, if any? tiny bit of guitar

40. What is your favorite animal? cats

41. What are your top 5 favorite Tumblr blogs that you follow? i can’t really say, i like following my friends (you know who you are i’ve msg you all basically)

42. What superpower do you wish you had? i always answer these the same way: absolute shapeshifting. 

43. When and where do you feel most at peace? in my own room around midnight OR with good friends anywhere

44. What makes you smile? anything exciting, really

45. What sports do you play, if any? uhhhh i did medieval swordfighting for a while but nowadays i dream of getting back to lifting and running

46. What is your favorite drink? water, coke, all coffee drinks, wine

47. When was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody? probs within a week, we communicate between flatmates with these lil post-it notes

48. Are you afraid of heights? yes holy shit so bad

49. What is your biggest pet peeve? when people are allergic to fun/are contrarians

50. Have you ever been to a concert? yuppp a couple times

51. Are you vegan/vegetarian? yes

52. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? an author, but before that a paleontologist, and before that a circus princess

53. What fictional world would you like to live in? eugh idk almost none of them??? somewhere where it’s p idyllic

54. What is something you worry about? planet dying, economy crashing, getting back to my own two feet after this horrible mental crash i’ve been going through all spring...

55. Are you scared of the dark? a lil bit, puts me on edge

56. Do you like to sing? hell yea!!

57. Have you ever skipped school? so many times

58. What is your favorite place on the planet? my parent’s house, this one street in kyoto...

59. Where would you like to live? honestly? in the center of the city i’m living in now, or the capital... ... or kyoto or tokyo...

60. Do you have any pets? no, flatmate has cats tho

61. Are you more of an early bird or a night owl? night owl but a fairly balanced one

62. Do you like sunrises or sunsets better? either is good

63. Do you know how to drive? yes

64. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? headphones!! but i use buds more, more practical.

65. Have you ever had braces? yes.

66. What is your favorite genre of music? metal. like the sorta frilly vampiric neoclassical metal tons of jrock bands do?? but i like a huge variety of genres.

67. Who is your hero? gotta be my own hero

68. Do you read comic books? rarely, if we don’t count manga

69. What makes you the most angry? petty pointless shit

70. Do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book? on my phone

71. What is your favorite subject in school? languages/literature

72. Do you have any siblings? four of them, two big sisters and two lil brothers

73. What was the last thing you bought? .... some food? uhhh boxers?

74. How tall are you? 168 cm ish

75. Can you cook? yes

76. What are three things that you love? storytelling, good food, good laughs

77. What are three things that you hate? generic bad injustice shit in the world, people who make fun of others for things they like, lmao my current writer’s block towards my main fic ahahaha ;;;

78. Do you have more female friends or more male friends? seriously fuck these questions? most of my friends are nb

79. What is your sexual orientation? queer and complicated

80. Where do you currently live? Turku

81. Who was the last person you texted? a friend

82. When was the last time you cried? i have no clue, i don’t cry often

83. Who is your favorite YouTuber? everyone who subs vocaloid stuff

84. Do you like to take selfies? yessss 

85. What is your favorite app? just my JED fhgadhadh

86. What is your relationship with your parent(s) like? a bit distant (due to physical distance) but warm and friendly and supportive

87. What is your favorite foreign accent? .... this seems strange but uh. no specific preference? throaty languages, french and arabic and russian come to mind...

88. What is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit? TOKYO ive been to japan twice and lived there for a while but never managed to visit tokyo

89. What is your favorite number? 11

90. Can you juggle? a lil bit?

91. Are you religious? anti-religion more like ahaha

92. Do you find outer space of the deep ocean to be more interesting? both, both is good

93. Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? not really but then again i do tend to take things as challenges...

94. Are you allergic to anything? this one is a weird one. there’s a chemical that does cause some sorta reaction? it’s in some cardboard boxes and used in treating hemp rope..... 

95. Can you curl your tongue? yes

96. Can you wiggle your ears? yes

97. How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? anytime i can’t wiggle out of it like “oh true yes that’s what i meant i was almost correct the first time” lmao

98. Do you prefer the forest or the beach? ... forest

99. What is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you? it’s okay to half-ass things, it’s better than not doing anything

100. Are you a good liar? i think so

101. What is your Hogwarts House? gryffindor not slytherin shut upppp

102. Do you talk to yourself? sometimes

103. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? ambivert? sorta more extrovert

104. Do you keep a journal/diary? nahh not really

105. Do you believe in second chances? yes

106. If you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do? if there was no-one nearby who could have obviously dropped it... or who could see... i would pocket any cash and take the wallet itself to lost and found.

107. Do you believe that people are capable of change? yea.

108. Are you ticklish? no

109. Have you ever been on a plane? yes, several times

110. Do you have any piercings? fourteen and planning to get more 

111. What fictional character do you wish was real? not really anyone...

112. Do you have any tattoos? yup a big fat nb koi on my left calf

113. What is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far? going ahead with transitioning

114. Do you believe in karma? no

115. Do you wear glasses or contacts? glasses! really strong ones too lmao

116. Do you want children? no. wouldn’t mind co-parenting someone else’s kids if that sorta person wandered in my life tho.

117. Who is the smartest person you know? well myself of course - no but really ahh vrow has me beat in my category of intelligence.

118. What is your most embarrassing memory? i sorta picked on a kid for no reason in elementary school. it was a singular incident and i apologized a year later.

119. Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? yessss currently doing one

120. What color are most of you clothes? black

121. Do you like adventures? yea to a degree? 

122. Have you ever been on TV? nope

123. How old are you? 24

124. What is your favorite quote? hhhh i don’t have all-time faves but currently just. “Just stay by my side, it doesn’t matter even if it’s a lie.”

125. Do you prefer sweet or savory foods? just give me all the food

[flutejesus]

smells in band

worst: valve oil best: this saxophone like i dont know if its a normal thing or the cleaner jondon used on it or some freakish chemical reaction but it smells like the sweet tears of mother mary herself holy fuck it lingers i can still smell it mmmm yes

[operagheist-blog]

APOLLO’S LYRE. haha let’s talk about what the heck is physiologically or psychologically / neurologically wrong with erik, because i have a heckton of theories. PSYCHOLOGICAL CATEGORIES HERE.

ok first off, this shit all went down in the 1800s, so there was a lack of knowledge of modern medicine because it’s MODERN MEDICINE; i just want to clear that up, first. i’ll address shit in sections as follows: PHYSIOLOGICAL ISSUES, facial deformity & plausible causes. possible co-morbid illnesses or symptoms due to plausible causes of deformity. physiological capabilities & deficiencies / finding logical & plausible things in this category. effects of morphine on the human body, withdrawal symptoms, plausible causes of death via physiological complications compounded with addiction. part 2 will address PSYCHOLOGICAL / NEUROLOGICAL ISSUES, a brief overview of learning & memory. classical conditioning overview & its importance to erik’s aversion to touch initiated by another. operant conditioning overview & its importance to erik’s decision making process. stimulus / response / outcome generalization vs. discrimination of external / environmental cues, how his actions & thought processes have been affected in this manner. an overview of personality psychopathology & displayed symptoms / plausible diagnoses ft. the DSM V. emotional instability theories. opiates, endogenous opioids ( endorphins ), brief overview dopamine’s effect on biochemistry of the brain, brief clinical overview of dopamine in relativity to schizophrenic traits. morphine’s effect on brain chemistry overview + withdrawal effects on the mind. WITHOUT FURTHER ADO: 

PHYSIOLOGICAL CATEGORIES 

THE FACIAL DEFORMITY + CONCLUSIVE CAUSE FOR THIS SPECIFIC PORTRAYAL. 

i’m going to start this with LEAD POISONING while erik’s mom was pregnant because uh yeah.          lead is a hazardous substance that should be avoided at all times. it is particularly important         to avoid when pregnant as it is passed freely from mother to child via the placenta. the primary         sources of lead exposure are contaminated soil, lead-based paint & occupational exposure.         the risk of lead exposure also arises from the handling of crystal, ceramics, scented candle wicks,         plastic handle grips & arts & crafts materials also contain lead. even drinking water         can be contaminated from leaded pipes. some birth defects that can be caused by         lead exposure during pregnancy include* ( with bolded things applicable ) skin tags         & other skin markings / undescended testicles in males / shortened gestation /         premature delivery / low birth weight / premature rupture of fetal membranes (PROM) /         spontaneous abortion / miscarriage / neurological damage / developmental delays [ source ] it’s the 1800s, did they even kNOW about the hazards of lead? lead pipes were a thing, i’m fairly certain, if it could be in the soil, that could impact things. lead paint was an issue when my parents were buying a new house when i was little ( i’m 23 ), people still check for lead paint. with all of that, this is honestly one of the main things i’ll be including as a cause for the visible deformity. 

the second cause that i’ll incorporate is MERCURY POISONING during his mother’s pregnancy, however, this is less of the cause, but sure as heck didn’t help.          knowledge about the extreme vulnerability of the fetus to methylmercury began with         the minamata bay, japan experience [...] a chemical company released mercury into         minamata bay & polluted the bay heavily [...] the released mercury was methylated         in the aquatic food chain leading to high levels of mercury in fish [...] the local population         consumed high amounts of the fish. eating the fish, pregnant mothers did not only         burden themselves, but methylmercury was transferred in utero to the fetus.         this caused severe neurological complex symptoms & severe birth defects. while the mothers         were usually without symptoms of mercury poisoning, their babies were born severely         damaged with microcephaly, cerebral palsy, severe mental retardation, seizure disorders,         blindness, deafness, & other malformations. depending on the dose & timing of exposure         during gestation, the effects may be severe and immediately obvious, or subtle & delayed,          the newest findings from long-term cohort studies suggest that the cardiovascular system         is also at risk—with increased incidence of high blood pressure & decreased heart rate         variability as methylmercury exposure increases. the full expression of these health effects         of methylmercury can be delayed & deficits are often irreversible. [ source ] THE MOTHERS USUALLY WERE WITHOUT SYMPTOMS, so if mother dearest isn’t displaying anything of the sort, how could anyone know about what the heck could go wrong in the pregnancy? 

MIND YOU, i’ve seen a lot of the whole erik fretting about it being genetic; that’s completely understandable even if it isn’t a possibility ( or if the possibility is slim af ), because I REALLY DOUBT ERIK KNEW ABOUT THE EFFECTS OF THIS, EITHER, SINCE I’M PRETTY SURE IT WASN’T STUDIED ( see: mad hatters were called as such because they made their hats shiny with MERCURY ).

CO-MORBIDITY FACTORING IN HEADCANONED CONCLUSION + IMPACT ON PHYSIOLOGY, DEFICIENCIES IN SOME AREAS & THINGS THAT PROBABLY AREN’T AFFECTED AT ALL.

mmmm ok so uh even in leroux’s canon, erik still is quite capable of physical activity, despite other issues, kay’s erik has more notable health complications, because morphine. stage & 04 movie erik? do you know how much physical capability it takes to do whatever the fuck he must be doing when he’s doing basically probably the equivalent of stage rafter parkour, also here is a pbs thing on how hard it actually is to break someone’s neck. tldr, that shit isn’t easy, so the co-morbid effects likely aren’t fucking up with his muscular system in a way that would impair activity. something that likely has been affected is his nervous system, particularly sensory neurons. erik is in pain, that’s why he’s taking morphine. the issue might not be the muscular system, but then there’s the question of pain tolerance without morphine. now, being in pain does not mean that he’ll react in a way that would show that he’s in physical pain — likely, this is something he’s learned to suppress ( the reaction to physical pain ). tldr; he dodged muscular system issues from the lead / mercury combo what a miracle, but his nervous system might’ve taken a hit. 

MORPHINE EFFECTS + WITHDRAWAL + A REALLY HALFASSED PLAUSIBLE PHYSIOLOGICAL DEATH 

morphine is a painkiller that acts upon the central nervous system, morphine may be used in medical situations such as: painkilling  — morphine is used primarily to treat both acute & chronic severe pain. it is also used for pain due to myocardial infarction and for labor pains [...] concerns exist that morphine may increase mortality in the setting of non ST elevation myocardial infarction. morphine has also traditionally been used in the treatment of acute pulmonary edema [...] shortness of breath — immediate-release morphine is beneficial in reducing the symptom of shortness of breath due to both cancer and noncancer causes. in the setting of breathlessness at rest or on minimal exertion from conditions such as advanced cancer or end-stage cardiorespiratory diseases, regular, low-dose sustained-release morphine significantly reduces breathlessness safely, with its benefits maintained over time. opioid use disorder — morphine is also available as a slow-release formulation for opiate substitution therapy (OST) in austria, bulgaria, & slovenia, for addicts who cannot tolerate either methadone or buprenorphine ( but, this is modern, so ignore this ). [ source ] 

here are some signs & symptoms or morphine abuse, relevant things are bolded: symptoms that a person may have taken too much morphine. shallow breathing - it may feel like the person’s chest is barely moving and there may be few breaths each minute / feeling faint or dizzy / confusion / low blood pressure, especially when a person is also taking other medications that cause a drop in blood pressure / constricted pupils / loss of normal muscle tension / cardiac arrest / cold & clammy skin / circulatory collapse  / coma. LET’S GO REFER TO KAY’S CANON, which is where the morphine addiction really comes into play — erik has a slew of problems from that & i’ll bet he dies due to cardiac arrest. i think he’s also been noted to be colder to the touch but i’m not absolutely sure. basically these things are signs of overdose. here are some withdrawal symptoms, relevant things still bolded , italics are plausible: ( a person using morphine according to a doctor’s instruction can still become addicted to the drug, sometimes in as little as a few weeks. if a person tries to discontinue use, they will manifest some or all of these signs of withdrawal that are common to opiates: sweating / chills / tearing eyes / runny nose / restlessness / muscle aches / backache / dilated pupils / irritability / trouble sleeping / high blood pressure / rapid heart rate / vomiting / diarrhea / stomach cramps. SO UH, yeah. erik’s fucked [ source ].

OK HERE’S THE DEATH ANGST PART I AM SO SORRY. again, for my sanity & continuity, i write during plot erik between the ages of 35 & 39. factoring in travels & or circus show things & the incorporated architect’s apprentice part, the circus would be the early childhood years through at most his early teen years. his apprenticeship likely covers from his mid teen years to his early to mid twenties. the persia experience then would be his mid twenties to at most thirty, because shit went down & he had to flee. that leaves between 5 & 9 years of being the opera ghost. most likely, he’s closer to 39, especially since christine is supposed to be like 16 during the main plot & she arrives when she was 7 (?). note, erik likely fell in love with her more due to the fact that he somewhat got to know her; she probably confided in her angel of music about various things. the less innocent nature of the attraction probably wasn’t a thing until she was at least 13 or 14, giving him him 6 or 7 years to get to know her, assuming he’s 39 ( which gives 9 years of getting 30,000 francs a month or some shit + opera ghost-ing etc. ). i previously wrote about the life expectancy when erik was born, which was in the thirties at birth & if the child lived past ten, reached the fifties. i also noted that the life expectancy in 1910 when leroux published the novel was on average 51. now, let’s go back to when erik would’ve even had access to opiates, which i’m going to assume was persia. let’s say he arrives in persia at the age of 26 & works for the shah until shit goes down when he’s 30. & has access to opiates somewhere in that range of time ( quite possibly very soon after he arrived ).          opium is said to have been used for recreational purposes from the 14th century onwards in          muslim societies. ottoman & european testimonies confirm that from the 16th to the 19th          centuries anatolian opium was eaten in constantinople as much as it was exported to europe          [...] turkey supplied the west with opium long before china & india [...] extensive textual & pictorial          sources also show that poppy cultivation & opium consumption were widespread in safavid iran           & mughal india. even today, iran ( persia ) has very easy access to opium, where it is less          expensive than beer [ source ]. ok ok so, i’ll give him the benefit of the doubt, but even if the addiction began at the end of his time in persia, & a person can end up addicted in as little as a few weeks, that’s still 10 or so years of addiction. so, factoring in withdrawal ( say, he somehow doesn’t have access to it, imports to europe don’t line up etc ) or the possibility of overdose, it’s unlikely that erik would live past his mid forties & this is disregarding psychological factors.