#my avoidant attachment style king :33

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

@preeningpisces ODI ……. i had to answer this in a new post because i have way too many thoughts for the reply limit to handle LMAO

BUT . yes. suguru’s family life <3333 thank you so much for asking!!!!!! imo it’s one of the most interesting things about him because it’s so important to his character, but we know so little about it. we know that he killed his parents, and that it shocked satoru, but that’s all.

this is just my own interpretation!!!! but i’ll die on the hill that his relation to his birth parents was….. strained at best. and i think a lot of subtextual content implies that!!! there’s the fact that suguru calls kuroi riko’s family despite them not being blood-related (which shows that he doesn’t care abt the biological aspect of being a family), but there’s also the old man that he fights . who also grew up in a non-sorcerer family and mentions being shunned because he could see the unseen. there’s obv nanamimi too….. i just feel like it all hints towards suguru having a similar background :’3 i don’t think many sorcerers born into non-sorcerer families have a good relationship with them.

AND . personally i like this take most, because it just makes so much sense when you look at the kind of person suguru is…. his desire for a family, how put-together he is for his age. his lying!!!! i think he learned how to lie at a very young age. i think he lied to his parents after realizing they didn’t believe what he told them about seeing curses. even though he was just a scared, confused child, i think he internalized that realization. and i think that’s why he’s so keen on bottling everything up, putting on a polite smile to appease the adults around him…. etcetc. i just can’t see his relationship to his parents being anything but fractured. maybe they appear loving at a glance, or whatever, but it all hinges on suguru lying to them. not being his true self. and i think that’s why he yearns for a family. a place where he really, truly belongs, where he doesn’t have to hide who he is. and jujutsu high gave him that!!!! those years weren’t just the best of gojo’s life, but of sugu’s, too. it was a safe place for both of them :((((((

….. anyway . i got carried away but 😭 yeah!!!!! this is my own interpretation but i’m veryyyy secure in it lmao. i can’t picture him actually loving his birth parents, so i don’t think it was really that . tough? for him to kill them. it might even have been a relief. like he said to satoru — those people were never his family to begin with.

[the-kings-of-games]

i’m not popular enough to get tons of asks, but I pushing off zine work and secret santa so fanfic writer asks! (YGO only)

1. What’s your favorite character(s) to write for? 

Answered here

2. What character(s) do you find the most difficult to write for? Why? 

Characters that don’t get much of a reaction from me from the beginning or at any point, and characters I have never considered writing before (like Bruno). Never feel like I’d write them so I never put thought in their character and stories. 

3. Do you have a favorite scene you’ve written from [Fanfic Name] story/chapter? 

Yeah, from Two Fingers Crossed Over Your Lips, Chapter 8: Domestics (Orinthoptershipping). It’s when Crow is laying on top of Bruno on the couch, and they share a kiss. Crow is flirty, and Bruno is cute. I think this is the best example of my portrayal of Crow, lol. 

4. Did you have any ideas that didn’t make the final cut of [Fanfic Name]? 

No, for the most part, I end up using pretty much everything I write out. I’m the kind of person to go back and cut out entire scenes because I tend to write out scenes I like/want to do and find ways to connect them together. It can be kind of counterproductive because some scenes might actually pull you away from the plot you wanted, but I never never plot before I write, lol. 

It doesn’t mean, however, that that I have never ended up writing something bigger than I expected. Currently, it’s The Supreme King’s Husband (Prologue) because I just wanted to add in Yūsei and Kizuna, omgs. QWQ

5. Do you listen to music when writing? 

Yes, I do. It both keeps me focused and distracted at the same time. 

6. If you listen to music when writing, what [do] you listening to when writing [Fanfic Name]? 

A lot of Joji, Jack Strauder, Oliver Tree, CUCO, and the like. Pretty much this mix. 

7. What story/headcanons do you feel the proudest of? 

I really love my headcanon of Crow being masculine leaning genderfluid afab (assigned female at birth). It’s really fun exploring this headcanon, and I always write Crow with this in mind. However, it’s only 5D’s Crow, not Arc-V Crow. They are both Crow but, in a lot of ways, are essentially two different characters, and I’m very attached to the former. Crow didn’t start doing he/him stuff until he was, like, nine, and Yūsei and Jack have been super supportive about it since the beginning. Crow was she one day, and he the next day. Still Crow. ^^ This is from one of my many Crow WIPs:

"It doesn’t matter how I look or what I call myself, I’d always be their friend, and they’d always be my brothers. The bond we share is irreplaceable, and I’m thankful to have met them in the first place. They’ve always supported me, and they know it’s my right to tell people about me, when and how. If I wanted it to be different, they’d be the first one to know. As it is right now, though, I’m happy with the way I am."

Crow has two feminine outfits he wears occasionally: a yellow dress with red flats (a gift from his girls), and a yellow blouse with a green plaid skirt and black knee highs. To go with these looks, he wears his hair down with his headband around his neck and shiny lip loss Trudge bought for him. 

8. Do you prefer writing one-shots or multi chaptered stories? 

One-shots by a long shot, lmao. That being said, I sometimes don’t finish one-shots either. 

9. If you had to assign a theme song to [Fanfic Name], which would you assign?

I don’t think in music. I do that thing where you pick a song and write a fic with it but not the other way around.   

10. What is the line you’re proudest of from [Fanfic Name]? 

One of my favorites, from the aforementioned Chapter 8: Domestics (Ornitoptershipping):

Closing his eyes, Bruno was taken back to the beach, the one he woke up at with no memories, but this time, he didn't feel the confusion, nor the faint touch of grief at the bottom of his heart. Instead, he only felt the quiet crash of the waves on his skin, the sun shining brightly over his head. This was now a memory he remembered twice.

(I really like this one-shot a lot, lol.)

11. How would you describe your style? (Character/emotion/action-driven, etc) 

A lot of dialogue, stream of conscious narrative. I think. I never really thought about it. 

12. Who is your favorite author? 

I don’t really have one at the moment. I don’t read a lot, lol. 

13. When did you start writing fanfic? 

I got more serious about it in high school, but I think I started during middle school? KHR was a thing then, lol.

14. How do you feel about your older work? 

Answered here

15. What is the fanfic you’ve written that you’re most proud of? 

From YGO, probably The Distance of Time which features Orinthoptershipping. It’s very dialogue heavy, but it was a lot of fun. I’m very thankful of the people who took the time to read it, and even more those who commented and gave feedback. 

16. What fanfic tropes do you avoid writing for? 

I don’t do gore, violence, or torture. I don’t dislike them, I just don’t write them (so I don’t have any practice either). 

17. What fanfic tropes do you gravitate to writing for? 

I love ones that explore the idea of soulmates. I’m a big fan of the soulmates AU, but I love the different ways that people just complete each other that borders on more realism than trope. I mostly write fluff though, and attempts at humor because I think I’m funny. 

18. Do you prefer editing as you write, or waiting until it’s finished? 

I edit as a I write, which is bad because I don’t edit afterwards and miss typos (lol) and sometimes makes writing take longer to finish. 

19. What words do you think you tend to use the most? 

Epithets probably; otherwise, I don’t know. 

20. What feedback makes you the happiest to hear? 

I love comments that think my pacing is good and my character interpretations are great. If someone tells me that they can imagine this happening in canon, I’m over the moon. 

21. Is there an idea you’ve always wanted to write, but haven’t yet? 

Yes, and they’re all WIPs. 

22. Do you enjoy making OCs for your fanfics, or prefer sticking to canon characters? 

I mostly stick to canon characters and don’t like doing OCs (unless they’re extras or side characters). Writing OCs makes me a little uncomfortable actually because I fear veering into self-inserts which I cannot write because that’s even worse than doing OCs. The only OCs I like do are OC babies of my favorite ships. 

For YGO, I currently have two: Sky Hogan, the daughter of Crow (Papa), Jack (Father), and Yūsei (Dad); and Mira Princeton, the daughter of Chazz (Mama) and Jaden (Dad).

23. How much do you stick to canon? 

I try to write characters based off of canon as much as possible. If I don’t see a character doing something, then I don’t write them doing that thing. I’m more about filling in blank spaces than trying to rewrite inked ones. 

24. Do you prefer AUs with the characters, or sticking to the original universe? 

I do original universe most of the time. 

25. What scene in [Fanfic Name] took the longest to write? What was difficult about it? 

Smut scenes because they are pretty much one continuous scene, lololol. There’s no scene changes for the most part, so keeping up momentum is a must and a difficulty. 

26. Are titles for your stories easy to come up with? 

I suck at making titles. I can have whole fics done but back petal so hard because I forgot to give it title. 

27. What time of day do you prefer to write? 

Past bedtime. 

28. Is there a part of [Fanfic Name] you’re surprised no one has picked up on yet? 

I’m not sure what this is asking, lol. 

29. What part of the writing process do you enjoy the most? (Brainstorming, outlining, writing, editing, etc) 

Writing it. I don’t brainstorm or outline, I just write what comes to mind. I brainstorm only if I need to connect things together. Finishing it is a close second. 

30. Do you write down all your ideas? What makes you decide to write one versus the other? 

I never write down my ideas; it’s either I start on a WIP or I don’t. What I decide to write depends on my mood. 

31. What was the development process of [Fanfic Name] like? 

I write for three hours and produce only a thousand words, smh. Agony. 

32. What story do you think showcases your signature style the most? 

Fluff with subtle angst, I guess. 

33. Have you ever stopped yourself from writing something? Why? 

Yes, because I already have so many WIPs, I shouldn’t start on another one. (Does this stop me? No.)

34. Have you felt emotional while writing a scene before? What scene was it? 

I might have, but I have terrible memory. U_U

35. Where’s your favorite place to write? 

In my bed in the dark, on my phone. (Computers tire me out after a while.)

36. What fanfic of yours has the symbolism you’re proudest of?

I’m not sure what symbolism is. 

37. Would you ever collaborate with another writer for a story? 

Yes, but it will be a really big learning experience because I’m using to have most, if not all, control over my writing. I try to be open, but getting used to new things is hard, you know?

38. What story of yours are you surprised that people liked as much as they did? 

Honestly, for YGO, any of them. The feedback for YGO isn’t a lot, lol, or it’s because I write characters/ships/tropes a lot of people don’t go for? I’m just glad I now know the people who like my stuff. I know my writing is good, but I won’t force people to read it. 

39. What area of writing do you feel strongest in? 

Characterization, if I’m not being too big-headed, lol. 

40. What area of writing do you want to improve in?

I need to stop feeling the urge to rush ending and give the settings more details. 

[minnimari]

Enderal Character Ask – Fill it out yourself or reblog as is to use as an ask meme. Have fun! <3 So i start to work, but only in short answers :D ————————————— 1. The basics – name, age, etc… Her name is Mya Megles, 28 years young, female and quite normal.

2. Describe their appearance. I would say her hair is dark brown with little bit red. The red you can see in the sun.

3. How do they like to dress? She likes to wear trousers best and a linen shirt. Leather shoes not more. Yaaa.. its not special, but the most comfortable without armor. And dressesonly for nice occasions.

4. Do they have any markings (scars, tattoos, birthmarks)? Hehe.. a heroic scar on the face from a fight with a domestic cat ;D Big scar on the hip and a few small strokes through the birth of son.

5. What are they like? Describe their personality (use whatever tools you like- MBTI, D&D alignment, astrological signs, Hogwarts house, words/phrases): Ouw yes this ancient civilication. They call them starlings, i thing. So the stars are really beautiful, and plants, right. Astrology, Symbols and all this magic things.

6. How would they describe themselves? Mya is a little bit shy, but a happy person. She loves beautiful things such as sunsets, candles and flowery meadows. Just an almost typical woman. As far as trust in others is conserned, she is rather careful, because shes been hurt badly in the past.

7. Education level? On a scale from 1 to 10 she is a 7/8. Mya is a "Bookworm" and reads everything she can get her hands on.

8. What are they proud of in themselves? What are they embarrassed about? Proud? Rather happy to finally be able to decide for yourself about your own life. And possibly ashamed of being laughed at because of their height. Not to be taken seriously. As they are now by most in the Sun Temple ;D

9. Do they know any languages other than Inal? Only Inâl and native language.

10. What, if any, aspects of their mother’s culture influenced them growing up? Mother always sang songs about the old gods, no matter at what time. It always cheered her up. Mya´s forgotten many things in recent events :(

11. Name a song (or a few) that remind you of them. Almost all songs remind me of previous life with my family.

12. Speaking of songs, can they sing? What is their voice like? How about instruments? Mya can sing, but she doesn´t like singing in front of people. She´s got a deep voice for a woman. Hm.. She doesn´t know much about music, and she doesn´t play any instruments.

13. What was their life like before coming to Enderal? Before we noticed the real war, it was a nice quit life with son Kaleb and partner. Since he disappeared and mother died of a serious illnes and old age. She was lonely with son for short time until she met Sirius.

14. How did they decide to leave Nehrim? When Sirius opened Myas eyes to begin a new life. Kaleb (4) was too young to make this journey. With a heavy heart she placed him in a kind of monastery. The abbot knew her and her mother from befor. Now she doesn´t even know if Kaleb is still alive. Not a day goes by without thinking of him. The plan to go to another country came from Sirius. Different perspectives, different opportunities. He never told her how old he was. She suspected he was younger than she was. He had a lot of plans for the new life.

15. Describe their relationship with Sirius. Sirius will always remain Mya´s best friend, or like a brother. He was the only one she could trust after the thing with Kalebs father. Mother said she couldn´t sit in the house forever, she´s still young. So she made contacts with the outside world. They understood each other from the beginning.

16. Who do they blame for what happened to their family? Hmm... fate? The Nehrimese? Why must we always look for fault in others? Perhaps there were reasons for what happened.

17. Apart from stowing away, have they ever broken the law? On the run, Sirius and Mya stole to keep from starving. They couldn´t take much food with them on their journey.

18. How honest are they? Under what circumstances would they lie? She would only lie if the lives of the innocent were at stake. Better to be honest and hurt, than to be dishonest and have a bad conscience.

19. Worst memory(s)? Best memory(s)? Worst: mother on her deathbed with that whitegrey face. When she brought Kaleb to the monastery. Best: Mother always cooked and sang, and everyone laughed. Even Sirus was there. The birth of Kaleb. 20. Fight, or flight? Fight!

21. Describe their combat style. In short words: defensive and with full energy!

22. Have they ever killed before? What is their reaction to combat? She killed, yes. The blood is shocking at first. But it was easier to get through, when you were distracted.

23. How do they react to having magical abilities? Do they use them? Mya uses Restoration- spells after combat. Thats all she can take. She can´t handle potions. Fear of arcanistfever is very real. 24. What do they think of Enderal? Enderal is a beautiful country. Big Forests, great coastlines... The people are a little too much led by their trails. A little limited in their ability to think ahead. :D If she wanted to live in a place like this, it would be the Sunshine coast.

25. Did they do the Biggest Egg Hunt Ever quest? Of course! She got all the eggs Kurmai wanted.

26. How do they feel about joining the Order? What do they think of Arantheal? About the joining the Order, uh... it all happened very quickly. There was no time for Mya to get at least a little bit of information about it. She could have simply accepted smaller tasks, like Jespar. The life of a mercenary. A beautiful title. Myas opinion about Arantheal is very divided: He´s a nice guy, could be Myas grandfather. Strange was only that he put so much responsibility and trust in her. Apart from that she is a foreigner and has no idea. But she soon realized that he was selfish.. The opinions of his advisors were not important to him at all.

27. What is their opinion of the gods (or lack thereof)? The people of Enderal would be better off without the gods. They´d just ahve to learn to turn their own heads. That´s what it´s for. Each man should choose his own path, decide which vocation is best. A mayor or king would be quite sufficent for rules.

28. Wine, or pipe? Both! More wine, less pipe. Mya´s only weakness.

29. Do they spare or arrest Hallys, the farmer-turned-bandit in the quest, Deus Ex Machina? Why? Arrest him! He puts his own life before that of 100 poor people. The family should go to the food bank itself. If they´re not too proud.

30. What are their feelings and opinions about the Undercity? Mya´s disappointed about the undercity. The roads are destroyed. The "houses" aren´t even made of stone. It stinks everywhere. In the uppercity not a word is spoken about it. This is no life for a human being. If Mya could, and had the means, she would change so much. Not to see herself in a better light, but to prevent suffering. At least for the children or the sick.

31. How do they react to the beggars of Ark? When Mya sees a beggar, she supports him/her. Either with food or coins.

32. Where and how do they spend their time when in Ark? She´s home a lot. Sometimes in the dancing nomad with Jespar, when he has time. When Mya needs her rest, she also goes to Undercity in the Tavern.

33. What would they do with three wishes? Good Question. She would save them for important moments.

34. How do they feel about death? Do they fear it? Fear death? No, he´ll come one day anyway. Or if you´re not careful.

35. What (else) do they fear? Mya´s afraid of spiders. Big, hairy spiders... Fear of heights.

36. Do they have any secrets? Secrets, yes... Everyone has their secrets... :P

37. How is their behavior around people they like? People they dislike? If one of her loved ones needs help, she is there. But when she really likes someone, she shows it with little gestures and specific word. If she does not like someone at all, she tries to avoid them as much as possible. For example Natara.

38. What is their relationship with the companions? Who, if anyone, did your prophet romance? It´s difficult. Mya was initially very fascinated by Jespar. He is a good friend. Both have the same view of freedom and relationships. It is always an adventure to travel with him. He always has something to say. But Mya is not sure if she wants to start a romance with him.   As for Calia, besides Arantheal, she was the only person of the holy order who talked to her normally. She´s like a sister. Unfortunately, she is too devoted to her sacred duties. So spending time with her is very difficult. In herself a beautiful woman and very trustworthy, but not suitable for a romance. Now Esme: She doesn´t really know anything about Esme. She is a nice girl yes, but she is too attached to her partner. Esme and Mya finished a mission together, but when they finally met at the Tower, there was not much to talk about. The ways parted. Let us come to Tharael.. If Mya had never entered the arena, she never would have met him. In short words: He´s an asshole, but one with good intentions. Mya always wonderes if he had ever seen the uppercity. In all his conversations, everything he said referred to the Undercity, the father and the bad sides of the people. He definitely needs to relax. ;) Finally Dijam. A very strong personality, very dominant. The meeting with her were pleasant. But Mya can´t imagine spending a few days with her. Dijam is always convinced of her opinion, so Mya would never dare to speak her own mind. It would definitely lead to a fight. Currently, there is no Romance with Mya.

39. Was there any non-companion character that they were close to? That they particularly disliked? + Konstantin was an old unfriendly guy, but still quite cool. If Mya was interested in magic, he could be her mentor. She´s still wondering, was he like that in Nehrim? -Natara didn´t even knoe Mya and thougt she was going to be judged. Does she really think that Mya chose this path?

40. How do they feel about myrads? They are respectful animals. Loveable if domesticated, as the keeper said. Mya prefers the horse because of her fear of heights.

41. What dreams or ambitions did they have before coming to Enderal? What about afterwards? She never had big dreams. Just a simple life with her son.  Now her only dream is not to be alone and see Kaleb again. Maybe there are bigger dreams and Mya just doesn´t know it yet.

42. Do they like cities? Or do they prefer the country? Is there a region of Enderal that they like or dislike more than the others? It´s too loud in the city. Life in the country is much more relaxed. The suncoast was impressive from the beginning...

43. What do they do to lower their considerable stress? When Mya comes home after a mission, cooking something or meditating by the fireplace.

44. Describe their perfect day off. There are so many things you can do. Like take a bath in a water hole. Or lying on a flower meadow by the lake with a good book.

45. List three of their favorite things. Three things they hate? Her favourite things are her books. She likes listening to other people´s stories. Wine!.. hehe What she does not like are loud noises, ignorance and bad food :D

46. What’s in their pockets? Oh it varies from trip to trip. Myas diary is always with her. A few coins. Food. Everything you find interesting on a mission.

47. Pets? Mounts? Treasured possessions? A cat that always hides in the house. Then there is Hurricane the horse. Myas prized possessions are her books. Nothing about material things is more important to her.

48. How are their cooking skills? For regular food, Mya cooks very well. She learned that from her mother. She likes to bake things.

49. Do you consider any particular quest or side quest to be definitive for your prophet? Which one(s) and why? Every secondary task that involves making decisions is difficult for her.

50. How forgiving are they? For example, if they were yelled at in a brothel after searching high and low for this little sh*t, how would they react? Hm. It depends on what situation Mya´s in. If she sees a boy steal an apple, it´s her. But if she sees someone taking money from the poor. Then Mya´s not forgiven. (Hallys)

51. What do they think of the Veiled Woman? The first time, Mya thought she was in another dream. Whether she´s s ghost or a god, it doesn´t matter. When the veiled woman really plays a major role in this matter, why can´t she help? It will always be a mystery. She has no opinion for her. She doesn´t show herself enough.

52. If they had been a victim of one of the black stones, how would it have affected them? What would they have used its power to accomplish? Similar to little Rhyneus, she would have created a world as it was before. When everyone was alive and with her. Sirius, Mother, Kaleb,... In the end she would go crazy, because it´s all up to her wishes.

53. What was their reaction to the Black Guardian’s revelations? Do they accept or reject his offer? Even though it all sounds very lgical what the black guard says, she refused. The reason is: If he really comes out of that device/Goliath( How ever;)), the whole thing would start all over again. He would be a "god", yes. People would be subservient. And as it was depicted in the Star City, it would all happen again. Over and over.

54. How does their story end? With Mya, the story will never end. All solutions have good and bad sides. If she doesn´t start the purification and the construction of the beacon, everything is fine. All her loved ones stay alive.

55. Do they change over the course of the story? In what ways? No.

56. Anything else you’d like to share about them? At this moment, not no.

I am not a big writer but... enjoy it, please :D Big Thanks for @enderalappreciationblog

[doodlebugsandbumblebees]

You are straight-up a very sweet Hufflepuff whom I would be delighted to know any and everything about, so is it alright if I go ahead and ask EVERY question for the question meme?

Awww, wow!!  That really means a lot, thank you so much!

Alright here we go then!  We’re going to get to know me a whole lot better lol because these questions are pretty fun.  Obviously this will be a pretty long post so I’m putting it all under the read more

weird asks that say a lot

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Coffee mugs I think.  I have a pretty big collection of those.

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

This one is hard!  Probably chocolate bars though.

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Cotton candy 100%.

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

Hmmmm, I think hardworking and sweet came up a lot?  I was very much a teacher’s pet and the perfectionist anxiety set in early lol so I was a busy, over-achieving bee.

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

I prefer soda bottles.  Glass bottles especially.

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

It really depends?  But I guess I’m more tomboy style than anything else.

7. earbuds or headphones?

Earbuds because I like to have one in and one out so I can still hear what’s going around me.

8. movies or tv shows?

TV shows because I like having more time to get to know the characters (and domestic/casual situations for overpowered or zany characters are way more likely to happen in a show than a movie and I live for those lol).

9. favorite smell in the summer?

Rain on pavement because it just storms and storms in the summer and it’s so nice.

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

Hmmm I was good at anything that involved running?  And games that involved those wheely board things you sat on and scooted around on were always fun.

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

It varies?  Bagels or toast most often I guess.

12. name of your favorite playlist?

Sick beats.

13. lanyard or key ring?

Key ring with a little stuffed animal on it.  Right now mine has a bee on it and I love it.

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

Jolly ranchers.

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

Tuesdays with Morrie was pretty good.

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Criss-cross.

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

My plain white sneakers.  They’re not real pretty or anything but they’re very comfy and I don’t have to think about whether they match things.

18. ideal weather?

Partially cloudy all day, storm in the afternoon, cool in the evening.

19. sleeping position?

Always on one of my sides.

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

Notes on my phone or on my laptop with my typewriter keyboard.

21. obsession from childhood?

The Lion King and anything related to it.

22. role model?

Jane Goodall has been at least one of my role models since I was ten, but my mom is a big one too.

23. strange habits?

I’m still getting over periodically chewing my fingers?  Does that count?  I also have a quirk when it comes to touching certain metal things but especially coins so when someone hands me change I do everything I can to avoid touching it and hold it in the bills if I can.

24. favorite crystal?

Kinds of crystals I presume?  I’ve always liked rose quartzes and amethysts (especially amethyst geodes since I have a couple of those).

25. first song you remember hearing?

Probably something from Tarzan or Mary Poppins since those were my childhood movies.  So Stepping Time from Mary Poppins would be a good guess.

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Swimming.

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

Walking around in it because it’s hardly ever truly cold here and I like to savor it.

28. five songs to describe you?

I change music taste every five minutes so I’m going to say songs that describe me right now are brand new by ben rector, just a quail by louie zong, turning out by ajr, everything stays by olivia olson, and hooked on a feeling by blue swede.

29. best way to bond with you?

It’s all in the time.  I get attached to people pretty easy as long as they’re nice and we can goof around, have fun, and talk about whatever.  So putting time in to hang out means a lot to me.

30. places that you find sacred?

Hmmm, being deep in forests feels sacred to me so there are certain waterfall hikes in the smokey mountains and along the blue ridge parkway and in Hawaii that seem very special to me.  And then disney world and disneyland will always have a sacredness to them for me because they’ve meant so much to me and the happiness it brings people is pretty magical.

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

My comfy jean shorts and either my yellowish flannel or my guardians of the galaxy shirt with my rebel jacket. 

32. top five favorite vines?

Caterpillar Rave

I Smell Like Beef

I Could’ve Dropped My Croissant

Michael with a B

This Is The Comedy Police

Honorable Mention: FR E S H A VOCA DO

33. most used phrase in your phone?

Probably “okay cool” because I say that a lot.

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

We are farmers, bum bud um bum bum bum bum.

35. average time you fall asleep?

1 AM.

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

Oh gosh the first one… probably one of those vines up there.  It might have been fre shavocado.  This was a long time ago though.

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

Suitcase.

38. lemonade or tea?

Tea because I can’t drink citrus without it setting my mouth on fire lol.

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

Lemon cake but I don’t have it often for the reason listed above.

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

Some kids in elementary did something weird in the trees behind our school because the teachers weren’t watching them (I never knew exactly what it was but it was Bad tm) but the teachers didn’t know exactly who it was so they punished the whole grade and we were forced to only play kickball during recess for like 7 months and it was the worst.  It’s not exactly weird per say but I always found it wild that the only conceivable thing they could think to do to solve this problem was force a bunch of scrawny, socially awkward, miserable children to play ground baseball with a permanently half-deflated rubber ball.

41. last person you texted?

My brother.

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

Pants pockets but only because I don’t get to use jacket pockets as often as I would like to.

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

I’m completely tied between hoodies and bomber jackets.

44. favorite scent for soap?

Ocean.

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

These are my three faves, not fair!!  Sigh, probably superhero because even with sci-fi and fantasy my faves tend to be my faves because they have superhero elements.  The colors, the Drama, the angst, the powers??  What’s not to love.

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

Baggy t-shirt and athletic shorts.

47. favorite type of cheese?

Smoked gouda.

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

Watermelon.

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

“Keep moving forward.” from Meet the Robinsons most, but I also like “The bottom line is if you take a chance in life sometimes good things happen, sometimes bad things happen but, honey, if you don’t take a chance nothing happens.” from Dorothy in Golden Girls.

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

I don’t know about the hardest I ever have (because I am very lucky and have a very funny family so I laugh a lot) but watching vine compilations for the very first time with my siblings made me laugh really hard.

51. current stresses?

Fitting everything in.  Days just don’t feel long enough and social situations plus school stuff always get to me but I’m doing okay.

52. favorite font?

I do like times new roman even if it’s used a lot but I’ve been using the font yananeska for calligraphy stuff lately and it’s a cool one.

53. what is the current state of your hands?

They’re always a bit dry and on the warmish side but they’re pretty good.

54. what did you learn from your first job?

Have never had a job job but I volunteered in a library for like three years and it taught me to enjoy the details, slow down and enjoy the quiet, simple tasks, appreciate really excited kids, and try to help people whenever I can.

55. favorite fairy tale?

Aladdin or beauty and the beast I suppose?  I like that there’s multiple ways to interpret those stories and that they can be played with in some fun ways because they’re such interesting concepts by themselves.

56. favorite tradition?

How cities all over the world string up lights on things in the winter.  It means something different to everyone and some do it and some don’t which is totally fine, but this idea of lighting up the world during the bleakest month, and how some people go all out with colors and patterns and synced to music, and how everyone does it a bit different, and how entire cities are just smothered in lights means a lot to me.  I think it’s a very cool and very human thing to do.

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

The tough year before my family moved, getting through my really intense anxiety years where I couldn’t travel in cars for more than fifteen minutes without throwing up, and my month away at art school.

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

Hmmm, I guess I’m pretty proud of my writing ability, my singing voice, my art skills, and my ability to talk to anyone.

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

Probably something goofy like “YEET” or some variation of “That’s bonkers” because I do say those a lot.

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

Superhero.

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

“That’s all it is, a leap of faith.” from Spiderman: Into the Spiderverse is still pretty special to me.  As is “I never thought I could do any of this stuff, but I can.” same movie.

62. seven characters you relate to?

Aaaaaaaa another hard one.  Whoo boy, right now my gut instinct is probably: Judy Hopps (Zootopia), Miles Morales (Into the Spiderverse), Raph (Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles), Spiderham (Into the Spiderverse), Hagrid (Harry Potter), the firbolg (the adventure zone), and Sam-I-Am (Green Eggs and Ham).

63. five songs that would play in your club?

At the moment I would want you make my dreams by hall & oates, cantina band by John Williams, the bones by maren morris and hozier, hooked on a feeling by blue swede, and backflip by rivers cuomo to play.

64. favorite website from your childhood?

Coolmathgames.

65. any permanent scars?

I have a round scar on my elbow from when I skidded across the ground after crashing my bicycle.

66. favorite flower(s)?

I like lotus flowers, gardenias, and plumerias.

67. good luck charms?

My DnD dice, rocks (like my obsidian, sodalites, and amethysts), and my ten little lucky owl statues in different colors.

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

Beverly soda is the worst but a specific flavor I really don’t like is pickles.

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

Mantis shrimps punch so fast that the water around their punch boils.  Also they have seventeen color receptors compared to our 3.

70. left or right handed?

Right handed.

71. least favorite pattern?

I’m not quite sure?  I’m not crazy about optical illusions that look sort of smeared and are all black and white because they hurt my eyes so probably those.

72. worst subject?

I’m not great with math or sports, but I’ve gotten a handle on math as of late.

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

I’m not sure if they’re weird but I’m willing to try a lot so ketchup and mayonnaise is great, barbecue sauce and cheez-its is very good, and apples dipped in nacho cheese or salsa is not bad.

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

I think 4.

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

I think I was five?  Not sure.

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

Baked potatoes but fries are very close.

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

Aloe plants.

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

I don’t eat sushi so coffee from a gas station.

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

School id photo.

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

Jewel tones.

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

Lightning bugs.

82. pc or console?

Console.

83. writing or drawing?

Probably writing because it’s more straightforward to me but it depends.

84. podcasts or talk radio?

Podcasts.

84. barbie or polly pocket?

Barbie.

85. fairy tales or mythology?

Mythology because it gets wild so fast and cracks me up sometimes.

86. cookies or cupcakes?

Cupcakes.

87. your greatest fear?

Being annoying or mean without realizing it and driving people away.  I’m constantly scared I’m going to mess everything up which I need to work on because it’s hard to live that way.

88. your greatest wish?

Going to get a bit cheesy but to someday be a zoologist with some fun hobbies, travel often, feel satisfied with my life, and spend my days with someone I truly love and have a lot of fun with.

89. who would you put before everyone else?

Anyone in my family because we’re really close and they would do that for me.

90. luckiest mistake?

Probably going to an up-ity art school for a month a few years ago because while I was extremely depressed, homesick, and felt like a big failure the whole time, if I hadn’t done that and had my dreams crushed by some mean professors I might have gone there for a whole semester and spent a bajillion dollars to learn the same thing.  And it inevitably put me at the school I’m at now which I’m very very happy with and suits me so much better.

91. boxes or bags?

I like boxes.

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

Fairy lights because I’m a sucker for colors.

93. nicknames?

Doodlebug is the biggest one.

94. favorite season?

Fall.  Colors, halloween, thanksgiving, cooler weather, I love it ALL.

95. favorite app on your phone?

Spotify.

96. desktop background?

A painting of a whale shark from the Georgia aquarium because going there was a big deal for me and it’s very pretty.

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

Maybe 3?  I don’t have to memorize them much anymore lol.

98. favorite historical era?

I kind of like the 1920s aesthetic these days but I love very scattered things about history so picking one era is tough.

[codename-bewareofthefangirl]

About Me: Being A Writer

I was tagged by @oiivkawa 😍 Thank you dear, sorry if it took me so long!

tagging: All the ones tagged here :3 (If you feel comfortable) And everyone who read this and want to share: I’d love to know you.

1. How did you come up with your username and what does it mean? 

I discovered Tumblr while I was searching a place where I could talk and enjoy my fave anime and shows without being judged or anything else because I’m a nerd, socially awkward etc. etc. I wanted to create a safe space for myself and then for others. Nobody except two people knows about this, so I felt like I had a secret hideout -> I felt like an agent undercover.

2. Which fanfic of yours has the most feedback? (Bookmarks/ Subscriptions/ Hits/ Kudos)

Surely the ones I used to write in Italian, I reached the 1000 XD Now that I write in English I’m sort of an underdog. I have some popular posts or ask. As in for proper ff, it’s Confetti 

3. What is your AO3 profile icon and why did you choose it? 

Uh I still don’t have one. At first, I created the account only to follow my fave authors and to comment, I didn’t think I was enough good to post my works. I’ll probably put the same one on my blog, Iwa-chan. As I empathize greatly with Oikawa, I admired Iwaizumi a lot; plus, the image is a lot calming and beautiful.

4. Do you have any regular/favourite commenters? 

I love everyone who spare their time to comment. I don’t have “regulars” on ao3, but here on tumblr @jenasisity , @ru-cchi and @secret-fujoshi-diary have been with me from the start. @mhioislife is always there for MatsuHanaIwaOi and I love her blog. And I go crazy when people, especially artists, I admire comment positively in my posts (ex. my lovely @nyciel )

5. Is there a fanfic you keep going back to read again and again? 

I have a good memory for stories, so I don’t re-read many of them. Coffe King by Oiivkawa and few others are my exception.

6. How many stories are you subscribed to? How many do you have bookmarked? I subscribed to nearly 100-105 ff and bookmarked 99. 

7. Which AU do you find yourself writing the most? 

I LOVE AUs, I’D LIKE TO WRITE MORE. I love Uni/College Au (being a uni student too), Soulmates Au and Fantasy/Historical but I have barely written for them here. 

I’ve been requested more than once (and I enjoyed them greatly) Zombie!Au, HarryPotter!Au, Bodyguards!AU and Spy!Au. I also love Crossovers.

8. How many people are subscribed and bookmarked to you in total? 

On AO3 subscriptions: 36 bookmarked: 40

9. Is there something you’d like to write about but are afraid of people judging you for it? (Feeling brave? If so, share it!) 

I’m scared every time I write in English, terrified. I’d love to be more confident and being able to finish my projects, since I get discouraged easily when I don’t have feedback. (I was spoiled when I wrote in Italian, but I’m working on it) I’d love to write more AUs, even small shots!

10. Is there anything you’d like to be better at? Writing certain scenes or genres, replying to comments, updating better, etc. 

MY ENGLISH. I WANT TO HAVE A FLUENT ENGLISH. And I’m not comfortable with explicit smut, so I avoid it. (and updating with frequency, but my studies don’t let me)

11. Do you write rarepairs or popular ships more often? 

I usually ship popular ship...i think? It depends on the anime. My OTP are IwaOi, KuroKen, BokuAka, AoKise, GaLe and KiriBaku. 

I have some rarepairs: I’d die for AoKawa (Aomine x Oikawa, Crossover), BakuShimaNari, TodoDenki, my OT4 MatsuHanaIwaOi and (idk if it’s rarepair) BoKuroo

12. How many stories have you posted on AO3 to this day? 3

13. How many stories do you have saved in/ with your writing program? Like WIPs? 

HAHAHAHAHAH. Only stories, without headcanons or scenarios? 104

14. Do you write down story ideas or just keep them in your head? 

It depends, I’m constantly creating stories, especially if I’m bored, and always before sleeping. I think at least one or two a day so…no, I write down the only ones I project to write or to which I’m particularly attached to. Otherwise I keep them in my head.

15. Have you ever co- authored a story? 

Yep, more than once. It’s fun and motivating if you manage to get along.

16. How did you discover AO3? I was searching a new base to read fanfiction from, in English this time, and I stumbled upon it.

17. Do you consider yourself to be a popular or famous author in your fandom(s) on AO3? Nope, no really. I was in my Italian fandoms XD Now I just enjoy sharing small things and reading beautiful ffs. 

18. Do you have a nickname or fandom name for your readers? 

Survivors. (jk, I don’t have one) I call everyone “dear” or “sweetheart” since I don’t want to offend anyone by assuming things.

19. Was there an author who inspired or encouraged you to write? 

In general? Probably my father when I was little, but it was spontaneous. I’ve always created stories, I just needed a way to let them out and…puff, I started writing.

20. What writing advice would you give to a beginning author? 

Everyone starts from the basics, making mistakes, receiving few appreciative comments or kudos…don’t let this discourage you. First, because practice makes you better. Second, because even if it’s one person who reads it and leaves a “like”, it means you have made them happy. You don’t know how important for them your story has been, you can’t know, so don’t sell yourself shortly. I’ve been saved over and over by the most unexpected stories.

And, always write something you love.

21. Do you plot out your stories or do you just figure it out as you go? 

Both! I have a vague idea and some scenes I’m sure of, but while I write it I understand all the rest. Arguing and discussing with the characters also helps. Half of the time, for most of the short stories, I start writing without having any idea of what I’m doing and they come up on their own.

22. Have you ever gotten a bad comment on a story? If so, what did you do? 

Not really, just corrections or correct observations, especially about my grammar or the logic flow. I thanked them, correct the ff and learnt from my mistakes. 

Ah, but I’ve received today my first hate on my character analysis of Bakugou Katsuki and…nothing, I’m bothered and a bit annoyed, but haters who have decided to not even try having a dialogue are not worth bothering. It’s just toxic. I tried to focus more on the positive or/and constructive feedback.

23. Is there a certain type of scene that you have a hard time writing? (Action, smut, etc) 

Nearly unable to write real, explicit smut (I get embarrassed and I don’t know the real dynamic sooo….) and action is also difficult if you want to describe a specific style of combat.

24. What story(s) are you working on now? 

I’m always working on my first book, I’m editing it. I also answer asks for fun (even if I’m horrible slow) and works on Confetti and Hell Mission (I, II)

25. Do you plan your new projects before you finish your current ongoing story(s)? I'm thinking of trying to write an otome.

26. Do you have a daily writing goal set for yourself? 

HAHAHAHHAHA NO I WOULD KILL MYSELF. I only set them for my book, for the rest I do it for pleasure and to relax.

27. Do you think you’ve improved as a writer since you first started? ABSOLUTELY YES.

28. What is your favourite story that you have written? 

My book, some old Italian fanfictions and…I have some favorite posts: Fantasy/Heian Iwaoi, Star Child, (okay, nearly everything IwaOi and MatsuHanaIwaoi)  my Aokise Zombie!Au (Red Sunset, Finally), my AkaMido The Ballad Of The Robin and my AoKawa Series (especially Shooting Stars)

29. What is your least favourite story that you have written? 

Usually, if I write or publish something, it means I love it. I often re-read what I’ve written, even if it’s embarrassing seeing how bad it was.

30. Where do you see yourself (as a writer) in 5 years? 

WITH A BOOK PUBLISHED I HOPE. Still writing fanfictions too, I like people smiling.

31. What’s the easiest part about writing? 

The spontaneous thinking part, during the first moments of creation, when the ideas come up to you; or when you have that five minutes flow where the words write themselves. The rest is pure hell, from the start to the end.

32. What is the hardest part about writing? 

Editing. I correct over and over the same parts, especially in lengthy stories. Deciding what to cut or not for me it’s torture, I want to keep everything.

It’s also difficult creating new, consistent, realistic, congruent characters.

33. Why do you write? 

It’s the thing I love the most in the world, I don’t know what could I do without it. I need it, it has saved me. And I love making people smile, I’m trying to do what other books and authors have done for me: Give me reasons to go on, hope, warmth, acceptance, a smile…I want to be able to do it.

It’s also my way of thinking and expressing myself since I’m socially awkward; it’s my way of communicating.

And, well, also a ways to have fun and relax when things get tough :3

[sonicawareness]

Phil Herring’s Favorite Albums of 2019

by Phil Herring, Brooklyn, NY

Happy Holidays all! Below are my favorite records of 2019. There are some big names, some little names, and some names that might be big one day. So, if you’re reading this, I hope you discover something new while also hoping my inclusion of something you like reaffirms your taste. Enjoy!

Here’s a quick precursor to my writeup, a Spotify playlist featuring a track from each of this year’s best albums:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6UK1mqu5cHpWixHKWY5z5S?si=OGx3NGw3QxumKvTWtZ92Mg

40) WEEZER – Weezer (Black Album)

Weezer’s biggest moments of 2019 will forever be that SNL skit with Matt Damon proclaiming he is “ride or die” for their discography and the irritating cover of Toto’s “Africa” but in between those they put out a neat little record that finished their California trilogy. Weezer (The Black Album) delineates from their previous lush power-pop of 2016’s Weezer (The White Album) and 2017’s Pacific Daydream to focus on 2019-style pop. Wisely realizing that trying to mimic the 90’s would give them pats on the back from their old fan-base while not yet breaking new ground, The Black Album is a fun, exuberant listen of Rivers Cuomo unafraid to do exactly what he wants with his songwriting while also continuing to embrace his underappreciated sense of humor. The power-pop crunch of distortion Weezer fans are used to is almost all but absent here as Cuomo drops goofy lingo among bleeping synths and lush strings and piano work. Fans of 90’s Weezer will continue to pout but records like this are what keeps Weezer significantly more interesting than other 90’s relics.

39) BIG DATA – 3.0

Producer Alan Wilkis was able to piece together an excellent debut in 2015 led by the hit single “Dangerous” which made some minor inroads at modern rock radio. In between other projects, he’s taken about 4 years to come back with 3.0 which continues to build on the excellent dystopian pop of the previous relief. 3.0 features less overall guest vocals and, as such, feels like a much more cohesive project as Wilkis is able to showcase his excellent production skills creating a skittish, psych-influenced take on modern pop. Given that this record has received literally zero promotion, I have a feeling this will likely be the last Big Data project which is a loss and Wilkis has a genuine gift for song arrangement and big lavish production values.

38) TOVE LO – Sunshine Kitty

Leading up to the release of her 3rd full length, Sunshine Kitty, Tove Lo promised it would be more upbeat than the previous two-part Lady Wood which, while also great, often sacrificed bright melodies in favor of dark club beats. Sunshine Kitty splits the difference between Lady Wood and her sparkling 2014 debut, Queen Of The Clouds. While pulling back on the overt focus on late nights, Sunshine Kitty is her most self-assured release to date, focusing on slick R&B beats and bringing her shiny hooks to the front, highlighting her extremely personable delivery. While she delves into some dark areas, Sunshine Kitty is always a welcoming listen highlighted by Tove Lo’s large and attention-demanding personality. Increased attention to songwriting makes this another fine collection in her catalog.

37) BLINK-182 – Nine

I’ve always had a bit of a complicated relationship with Blink-182. They were enjoyable in my youth but over time grew slightly irritating not so much due to their music but do their excessive juvenile humor and, at least to me, a bit of over-praise in terms of influence on other bands. As years have passed and with some more mature records under their belt, I’ve begun to appreciate them a bit more. To the masses, they will always be tied to youth culture even as the members inch close to 50 (!) but underneath a lot of their pop-punk sheen have always been darker and more interesting elements. Nine is their second full length with Matt Skiba of Alkaline Trio who replaced the nasal-sounding Tom Delonge in 2015. Whereas their 2016 release California felt like maintaining the brand in order to play amphitheaters, Nine melds together Blink 182’s pop-punk history with bassist/vocalists Mark Hoppus’ love of goth-inspired 80’s pop. With the band gelling better with Skiba after 4 years on the road, Nine is their best full length since 2003’s self-titled.

36) BISHOP BRIGGS – Champion

It’s a story as old as 2012. Famous female solo artist and lead singer of band fall in love, showcase their relationship via various social media platforms and then breakup. Bishop Briggs is clearly very wounded from her split from the lead singer of Sir Sly and has channeled that heartbreak into a passionate gospel-influenced modern pop album. Champion showcases her increasing confidence and skillset as a vocalist while injecting arena-sized bombast into her music. Full of huge choruses, big hooks and heartbreak, Champion is an excellent, concise sophomore effort from the rising star.

35) THE REGRETTES – How Do You Love?

On their second record, The Regrettes maintain their pop-punk sensibility and continue to take cues from 90’s-era riot grrrl inspired rock. How Do You Love is a logical improvement overall, sharpening the hooks from their earlier release while the band displays an improved chemistry which is what two years on the road will do to a young band. Lead singer Lydia Night has shifted her focus slightly from overall emotional maintenance to deal with a new and growing love as the theme of a new relationships plays out throughout the entire record. As always, it’s exciting to see young bands continue to grow and even with guitar-driven music on the backburner these days, also nice to see new bands keeping the flame alive.

34) CITY & COLOUR – A Pill For Loneliness

Dallas Green of City and Colour has now reached the stage of his career where he’s started taking a more reflective stance in his songwriting. Rather than craft another great singer-songwriter record, he’s beefed up his sound adding additional instrumentation and even brief spurts of psychedelic-tinged guitar lines (I swear one of the guitar lines in here ripped off “Up The Beach” by Jane’s Addiction). None of this would work without his confessional lyrics and deeply rich voice creating music that is usually somber and morose without being TOO much of a downer. Nearly two decades into his career and his solo project remains strong.

33) JADE BIRD – Jade Bird

For some inexplicable reason, Brits have always had a strange obsession with Americana-styled music. There’s a reason why acts like Kings Of Leon and other “rootsy”-type acts broke first in the UK and, at this point, the U.K. is now creating their own singer-songwriters in the style of pseudo country acts. Jade Bird’s crackling debut is a collection of whip-smart country-tinged rock songs displaying a healthy level of sass and vulnerability. While many of the songs deal with the usual tropes of relationships gone wrong and untrustworthy men, Bird is able to sell the songs more than her peers with a canny sense of playfulness while never giving the impression she’s lost control. It’s a great start from a promising new talent.

32) BECK – Hyperspace

Like his fellow 90’s alt-rock survivors Weezer, Beck has been able to stay consistently relevant over his nearly 3-decade career. Perhaps due to the fact that there isn’t one signature Beck sound his fanbase is attached to, he’s able to experiment with his sound without losing his fanbase which also means he gets to avoid doing the “back to basics” records that many of his peers eventually end up succumbing to. Hyperspace is a small step back from 2017’s Colors in that it’s not quite as peppy while still maintaining a focus of shifty beats and tight instrumentation. Even with bouncy rhythms, there are more signs of darkness, potentially due to his recent divorce, which allows for a more human side of Beck to come through.

31) SAM FENDER – Hypersonic Missiles

While America has largely moved on from guitar-based music, at least in terms of cultural ubiquity, the U.K. remains a firm believer and continues to crank out a steady stream of polite chaps armed with a guitar and a dream. Sam Fender rose to prominence via BBC Sound of 2018 short list and quickly drew comparisons to both Bruce Springsteen and Jeff Buckley. Hypersonic Missiles affirms those claims yet also affirms what an accomplished songwriter Fender is in his own right, tackling big themes such as the working-class struggle, small town loneliness, suicide and white privilege. Fender’s soothing croon brings an element of Americana to an otherwise exceptional singer-songwriter record.

30) THE NEW PORNOGRAPHERS – In The Morse Code Of Break Lights

Similar to fellow indie rock veterans such as Spoon, The New Pornographers have been so consistent throughout their career it’s hard to really build a narrative around each release. Being that they’re an aging band of white people crafting polite and canny indie pop, they also don’t get the benefit of the press fawning over their every move, so they simply continue doing what they’re doing for those who still care. In The Morse Code Of Break Lights differs slightly from their previous records in that all the songs save for one were written by one of their lead singers A.C. Newman, so the collaborative spirit is slightly missed here but it’s hard to complain when they offer another record of 11 power-pop gems.

29) ALICE MERTON – Mint

Hailing from Germany, Canada and a short stint in Connecticut, Alice Merton made a splash with “No Roots”, a hook-filled synth rocker driven by a rubbery bass line. Mint builds off the pleasures of that single and delivers a whole record of modern pop run through both an 80’s retro filter as well as with tinges of Americana. Merton herself sounds like a tried true road warrior even at her young age given her penchant for relocation over the course of her life. Mint is an excellent snap in time of a young woman figuring out adulthood while tackling larger personal themes. There are a ton of pleasant-sounding young pop acts rising but Alice Merton’s portrayal of actual life experience coupled with her winning personality make her stand out from the pack.

28) WHITE REAPER – You Deserve Love

When White Reaper signed to Elektra Records for their 3rd release, the band made a big point to say that any failure would be due to them, not due to any changes the record label potentially forced on them. Even with a new logo on the side, You Deserve Love sounds just like another great White Reaper record blending 50’s rock and roll swagger with some R&B keyboards and infectious melodies topped with punk energy. It’s great to see a young band hitting their stride and even though new acts aren’t really encouraged to be guitar-based anymore, I’m always happy to find more bands like White Reaper each year.

27) JENNY LEWIS – On The Line

For some reason, Jenny Lewis has mostly evaded me up until this year. It was never that I had anything against her, in fact I enjoyed her vocals spots with The Postal Service, but I just never fully dug into her catalog. On The Line is an excellent introduction and, even after going through her entire release history, stands as a career best. Using an A-list team of collaborators, On The Line plays like a great Laurel Canyon songwriter record of the 70’s, where Lewis uses her music to make sense of her reason breakup and other difficult life situations. Her vocal delivery so on point that her songs play almost like having a chat with a longtime friend which makes this lovely record even more charming.

26) BAD RELIGION – Age Of Unreason

Approaching their 40th (!) anniversary as a band, Bad Religion simply refuse to phone in a record. Sonically, not much has changed as they still favor razor sharp lyrics, three-part harmonies and undeniably catchy hooks. Age Of Unreason lightens up a bit on the speed and presents a more somber, reflective mood which is in stark contrast to 2013’s True North. While they have often been placed into the “political punk” category, their approach is often more around questioning the science, thought-process while trying to find a way to survive in the current troubled political landscape than that of outright anger. Age Of Unreason, as most punk records nowadays are, definitely touches on life in the Trump era while not outright naming him. There are references to “fake news”, the “alt-right” and “alternative facts” but as them embers of Bad Religion get closer to 60, their attitude has turned to survival which suits them much better than constant rage.

25) HOT CHIP – A Bathful Of Ecstasy The lines between indie pop, electro pop, and straight up pop are pretty much nonexistent in 2019. London’s Hot Chip has been kicking around pumping out electro-pop jams since 2000 and when they were tapped to collaborate with Katy Perry in 2017, no one batted idea. While they came up in the indie rock circles, Hot Chip has always been about slick electronic beats, organic instrumentation and sticky melodies. A Bathful of Ecstasy comes after a fairly long break but demonstrates how the band hasn’t lost any of their craft, pumping out on electronic-tinged indie pop gem after another with enough dynamics to keep the listener interested. Overall warmer than 2015’s Why Make Sense? this record is also all around more colorful and brighter even if the general lyrical themes of sadness permeate the record. While they may no longer be the focus of any sort of scene, Hot Chip continues on with another excellent record.

24) MUNA – Saves The World

Building on their dark pop 2017 debut, Muna brings in more emotional depth and big-issue topics such as addiction, love, and trying to make it in the world as a woman with fluid sexuality. The LA trio knows its way around a hook but also peppers their delicious synth-pop with a bit more conviction than the rest of the acts playing in the genre to give them something a little extra. Saves The World is everything one would want from a sophomore release in that the sound is richer, larger and more textured while also displaying growth in songwriting.

23) TEGAN AND SARA – Hey, I’m Just Like You

Upon hearing that Tegan and Sara were revisiting unreleased demo recordings from their teenage years, I was a bit skeptical. Songs written by teenagers, while often heartfelt, can lead to some cringe-worthy moments most would likely not want to be re-communicating in their late 30’s. Any doubts were dropped once I listened as Tegan and Sara maintain their impeccable songcraft on Hey, I’m Just Like You. After two excellent records of 80’s-inspired, synthpop, this release dials back a bit on the shiny synths in order to make room for jagged guitar lines propped up by new wave beats. This isn’t a full-on retreat to their folk-rock past and, instead, is another slight reinvention by the duo adding to their excellent catalog.

22) BASTILLE – Doom Days

Bastille, at least to me, has always been The 1975 without the pretension and flamboyant tendencies. This often gets them placed firmly in the “basic” category but their emphasis on crafting theme-driven records focusing on coping with the end of the world has always been admirable. Doom Days is a bit of a pallet cleanser after 2016’s “Wild World” allowing the band to take a more organic approach on their end-of-the-world style pop. Bastille are clearly avid chart watchers as they’ve been steadily incorporating EDM and R&B beats into their big stadium pop for a while, but Doom Days really allows them to shine in that area, particularly on album highlight “A Million Pieces”. Dan Smith’s earnest vocal delivery is still the highlight has he’s able to sell each of these great songs with a great combination of humility and imagination.

21) THE RACONTEURS – Help Us Stranger

For as talented as Jack White is, he can sometimes succumb to his worst impulses when left unsupervised as evident by his run of solo records this decade. Hooking back up with fellow prominent singer-songwriter Brendan Benson allows for his vision to be brought back down to earth as he and Benson trade off in garage-rocks rave-ups that are able to highlight their rock and roll swagger without sacrificing on hooks. Help Me Stranger is the first release by this supergroup in 11 years and its welcome return to more visceral and focused songs coming from White. Benson more than pulls his weight as well offering a nice everyman counter-balance to Jack White’s star power making Help Us Stranger a strong rock outing in 2019.

20) CAGE THE ELEPHANT – Social Cues

While they don’t get much in the way of big media coverage, Cage The Elephant have quietly become one of the biggest rock bands in the last 10 years. They’ve notched several #1 rock/alternative radio hits since 2008 and are able to play B-level arenas and/or play before the main headliner at your local festival. With every big rock band, there usually is a time period where they make their “Exhausted” record and Social Cues shows the wear and tear on the band. Frontman Matt Schulz who is often known for his wild stage antics is at his most somber here due to his recent divorce while his bands take the emphasis off their whiskey-soaked garage rock approach and color their sound with shades of gray. Even without listening to a single note, the track list itself will give you all the evidence needed for the theme of the record (“Broken Boy”, “Ready To Let Go”, “Goodbye’, etc.) It may not be their most immediate but Social Cues demonstrates a rock band going through a time of turmoil, pondering the meaning of it all and coming out with an elegant piece of work to show for their tough times.

19) X AMBASSADORS – Orion

After touring steadily supporting 2015’s VHS, the X Ambassadors began releasing a string of new singles in 2017 that were, supposedly, coming from their new record to be released in 2018. That never ended up happening as the band apparently found new inspiration and went into an entirely new direction. Orion is the result of a young band turning into a veteran band. Loosely billed as “Alternative Rock”, X Ambassadors pick up on the Imagine Dragons/Fall Out Boy 2.0 sounds and add in bluesy and jazzy elements, highlighted by lead vocalist Sam Harris. Along with a few other records on this list, one could easily classify this as a “basic dude” record but there’s a reason basic is shorthand for common, it works.

18) HOZIER – Wasteland, Baby!

Hozier took his time crafting the follow-up to his international 2014 self-titled debut and megahit “Take Me To Church”. Whereas some acts would go to great lengths to re-create the magic to give themselves another hit, Hozier never seemed that interested in mainstream success preferring that the world come to him vs. the him chasing success. Wasteland, Baby! amps up his gospel-like approach on his debut, focusing more on lush arrangements, somber instrumentation while also showcasing his new comfort with creating music for large rooms. There isn’t a TON of difference really from his majestic 2014 debut but that doesn’t matter when he has such a knack for crafting delicate, personal songs highlighting his incredible voice. He may not have another global hit in him, but Hozier is content to continue being the artist he wants to be.

17) BILLIE EILISH – When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We Go?

Poised to breakout since her dramatic “Ocean Eyes” was first posted on Soundcloud, no one quite owned 2019 like Billie Eilish did. When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We Go is her first proper full-length, but she had been slowly building up to it for nearly 2 years with a variety of singles and one EP. On her debut, her sound is now fully formed creating her own branded version of 2019 pop, complete with trap beats, whisper-style vocals and eerie instrumentation that works as a full statement as well as part of various streaming playlists. Throughout the record, Eilish never comes across as unlikeable, pretentious or reaching beyond her grasp which is due to her writing and recording all her own material with her equally talented brother Finneas and not succumbing to the usual trope of outside songwriters. Whether or not she can keep this momentum in the next decade remains to be seen but, for now, the world is for her to take.

16) FRIENDLY FIRES – Inflorescent In a recent interview, Friendly Fires front man noted that his band needed to record in a place with miserable weather in order for the band to create music that provides an element of escape. In the eight years between the last Friendly Fires record, Inflorescent accomplishes that element of escape and incorporates everything to be loved about their first two records. Sunny snyths continue to share space with island-type beats and warm infections melodies. If this record was a struggle to make, it doesn’t sound like it as the band rolls out one infection electro-pop gem after another. Indie pop has long since morphed into actual regular pop at this point, but Friendly Fires offer a nice alternative to the mono-pop genre of today.

15) BEAR HANDS – Fake Tunes

Hailing from Brooklyn, Bear Hands never quite fit into the indie-art-rock scene nor did they fit into the garage revivalists and post-punk bands formed across the river in Manhattan. Instead, they formed their own sound of lo-fi indie rock which dabbles in elements of hip hop, r&b and glitchy electronics. The star of the show continues to be Dylan Rau whose monotone-like delivery still packs an emotional punch as the band leaves behind the youth-oriented topics of previous releases and tackles on bigger-picture adult life issues. They likely won’t ever be as big as bands such as Twenty One Pilots, who they recently opened for, but Bear Hands has continued to carve out their own small niche in the indie rock world.

14) MAGGIE ROGERS – Heard It In A Past Life

Three years after she first came to fame via a viral video of her song “Alaska” impression Pharrel in an NYU songwriting class, Maggie Rogers finally unleashed her full-length debut. It’s actually a bit unfair to call this her proper debut as she self-released a folk album in 2014 but, for all purposes, Heard It In A Past Life is meant as a proper introduction to the world for Maggie Rogers. Building off of her SoundCloud-style pop and inclusive of some of her previously released gems (including the aforementioned “Alaska”), Heard It In Past Life is an A-list sounding debut carefully balancing electronic elements with the foundation of Rogers’ folk-inspired pop from earlier. It sounds remarkably self-assured for such a young artist and, most importantly, provides one excellent liquid pop gem after another held together by Rogers’s self-assured charm and vocal delivery.

13) BON IVER – i,i

Unlike many of his peers who came about in the late 00’s writing hushed, sparse, folksy acoustic music, Bon Iver has always been more interested in expanding his palette than playing to expectations. This year’s i,i streamlines his 2016 sonic freak out of a record (22, A Million) into more listenable songs while still maintaining a spirit of adventure. Clearly influenced by the variety of R&B, hip-hop and pop artists he’s collaborated with as well as his side projects, i,i is one of those rare records that are made for intense headphone listening and also made well for arenas which is fitting since he launched his first arena tour in 2019. Bon Iver spent the entire 2010’s undoing himself from his previous identity and with i,i he has succeeded in the best way.

12) JIMMY EAT WORLD – Surviving

Many people probably remember Jimmy Eat World for their peppy 2002 hit “The Middle” which entered the cultural zeitgeist again in the past few years due to Taylor Swift’s praise. Outside of this song, most people probably forgot they existed and haven’t realized the band has been consistently cranking out dense, multi-layered rock records for over 2 decades now. Surviving won’t necessarily bring the band back into the mainstream light but it’s another excellent entry in the band’s catalog stripping their sound down to its bare essentials and focusing on their aggressive power-pop nature. While the band has always been categorized as “emo” due to their unabashed earnestness and tendency towards high school dramatics, Surviving is the first record that really feels personal for front man Jim Adkins as he tries to keep things together entering middle age. In direct contrast to their last few records, Surviving features very little in the way of ballads and instead prioritizes crunchy guitars and delicious melodies. While they may not get a ton of press coverage, Surviving is more evidence that Jimmy Eat World has quietly put together one of the best discographies in modern rock.

11) CHARLY BLISS – Young Enough

Whenever a young rock band makes a point of “embracing pop”, that’s usually code for placing a higher emphasis on melody and hooks. Aspiring fuzzy rock grunge call-backs Charly Bliss showed a ton of promise on their 2017 debut but with this year’s Young Enough they were fully able to deliver on that promise, bashing out 11 hook-filled bubble-grunge tracks led by charming vocalist Eva Hendricks. In the press leading up to the record, the band spoke of a tighter focus on songwriting and chronicling the lives of 20-somethings which brings an additional emotional sheen outside of the glossy guitar-driven hooks, allowing them to stand out from other similar acts churning out this kind of music. Fuzzy-guitar 90’s style rock will probably never capture the cultural zeitgeist again but I’m always happy there are still bands out there like Charly Bliss.

10) FOALS – Everything Not Saved Will Be Deleted Pts 1 & 2

Technically, these are two separate records since they were released about 8 months apart but since I enjoy listening to them together and since they flow so well together, I’m counting them as one. Foals have not yet been able to achieve the same level of fame her in the U.S. as they do in their native England where they pack arenas, but they’ve been a consistent band since day 1. Everything Not Saved Will Be Deleted Pts 1 & 2 is meant to be their magnum opus, highlighting everything they do well along with stretching out their sound a bit to allow for more majestic and sweeping moments. There are still plenty of catch-and-release bangers to be had throughout but those are complimented by more melodic and reflective moments which make for a cohesive hour and 20 min listen that never overstays its welcome.

09) JAMES BLAKE – Assume Form

While he remains an “alternative” artist bubbling under the mainstream, James Blake has several high-profile collaborations under his belt, including with Beyonce in 2016. Assume Form dials back some of the sprawling templates from his previous release and presents the listener with a slightly more upbeat sound given assistance with some modern hip-hop and R&B flourishes. While Blake himself is an excellent vocalist, it’s his willingness to collaborate on Assume Form that makes it his best release yet, highlighted by appearances from Moses Sumney, Rosalia and even Andre 3000 who add some extra character to these dark electronic-laced indie pop jams.

08) COLDPLAY – Everyday Life

Somewhere around 2005 Coldplay became an easy punch line for boring people to make fun of. This was mainly due to being fun of in the 40-Year Old Virgin and a bad New York Times review which communicated the broad idea that Coldplay made wussy, non-fussy soft rock for simpletons. While an argument could have been made to support that with their first three (still great records), the band has been going the distance on every release since making the effort to expand their sound and not fall into the traps of simply being Coldplay. Everyday Life is their most sonically adventurous yet incorporating a wide selection of different sounds while not sacrificing their gift for melody. Even though it’s officially a double album, the whole thing is over than less than an hour which means it’s even shorter than some of their proper single albums and it flies by a lot quicker given all the sonic experimentation. Everyday Life may not include any surefire anthems or hit singles but it’s a daring move by one of the world’s biggest bands.

07) KING PRINCESS – Cheap Queen

The woman who goes by the name King Princess is actually named Mikaela Mullaney Strauss whose parents have strong ties to the music industry. Reading that alone will potentially cause an eyeroll for many of you and, yes, that’s likely what got her foot in the door to build a buzz as she steadily released singles and an EP over the past few years. Delivering her full length in 2019, Cheap Queen shows she has pop chops as she elegantly bounces from dreamy R&B, big pop and even electronic trip-hop type elements that harken back to the late 90’s. Cheap Queen functions as, in her own words, a “lesbian breakup album” and takes the listener through the initial phases of heartbreak, frustration and, in the end, acceptance. It’s the sound of a young confident artist not being afraid to put multiple influences in a blender and come up with a sound that’s her own.

06) THE BLACK KEYS – “Let’s Rock”

Like most people, I scoffed at the title of this record and rolled my eyes until I realized it was named after the last words of a man before he was executed. That aside, “Let’s Rock” is a fun, slick, groove-focused tight 180 from the Black Keys’ 2014 release, Turn Blue. Whereas Turn Blue was an open, spacey and meant for headphones, “Let’s Rock” gets the ‘Keys back to doing what they do best: writing slick, focused rock and roll with minimal fuss. While not entirely a “back to basics” record, “Let’s Rock” is an aggregate of 2010’s R&B-styled Brothers and 2011’s riff-roaring El Camino. Stacked with hooks and relentlessly tight, this record is another excellent addition to the Black Keys catalog.

05) LANA DEL REY – Norman Fucking Rockwell

Most acts don’t survive the amount of critical hype and then subsequent backlash that Lana Del Rey has. After early praise was poured on her for beautiful lush early singles like “Video Games”, she delivered a patchy debut, Born To Die in 2012 which made everyone believe she was yet another product of record company creation and overhyped delivery. Since then, she’s put out one stunning release after another which has even allowed for Born To Die to retrospectively become acclaimed. Norman Fucking Rockwell is a career best cementing her as a millennial American songstress creating her magnum opus full of dark moody ballads with elements of trip-hop, dream pop and gorgeous arrangements. It also continues her run as one of the most unlikely pop stars to emerge this decade.

04) SIGRID – Sucker Punch

While ever female pop star is out trying to define to their brand, shock and provoke, Alice Merton is fine simply being “basic”, which has become a negative term for anyone not aggressively attempting to differentiate themselves from the “normies” of the world. Sigrid’s full-length debut builds off of her previously successful EP’s and expands her sound slightly to show off a larger vocal range and sense of sonic exploration. All the usual big themes are here but most consistent is that of young love, namely what “love” means to someone in their early 20’s and how they navigate the field. Sigrid makes no bones about being a normal girl as she incorporates sounds from the 80’s, 90’s as well as today’s top 40 into an excellent dynamic collection of songs.

03) THE NATIONAL – I Am Easy To Find

When you’re a band for nearly 20 years and you’re going into make your 8th record, it’s good to shake things up. I Am Easy To Find is The National’s most collaborative effort yet tapping into various female singers potentially as an effort to adjust the dude-centric focus that The National’s sad sack brooding indie rock is often saddled with (enjoyable as it usually is!). I Am Easy To Find is a potential career-best for the band, boasting gorgeous, lush arrangements with the guest vocalists complimenting singer Matt Berninger’s whiskey-soaked baritone. It’s not common for a band to sound so exciting 8 records in but The National have continued their winning streak in 2019.

02) VAMPIRE WEEKEND – Father Of The Bride

After the tour supporting 2013’s Modern Vampires Of The City wrapped in late 2014 them members of Vampire Weekend took a long break, started families and lost a crucial member with multi-instrumentalist and producer Rostam Batmanglij leaving the band. Many other bands would have likely crumbled or turned in a quick sub-par record but bandleader Ezra Koenig rallied his band with a group of A-list collaborators into a lovely, concise and crisp double record that never feels overwhelming or bloated. Continuing to build off of their initial afro-pop foundation, Vampire Weekend created their magnum opus full of excellent guest stars, intricate melodies and gorgeous songs. While the first three Vampire Weekend records were a trilogy about growing up and living through your 20’s, Father Of The Bride is a full-on adult record with Ezra Koenig grappling with the realities of being a father, husband and moving into middle age. It may not all be rosy material, but Vampire Weekend make it sound so effortless and continue to make the case for why they are indie rock A-listers. Bonus points also awarded for the excellent support cast of Danille Haim, Steve Lacy and even Sting (!!) showing up on the bonus track version.

01) TOOL – Fear Inoculum

It’s been 13 years since Tool’s 10,000 Days and the title of THAT record would actually make more sense when discussing the rumination of Fear Inoculum. Various delays, side projects, legal hold-ups and general life have taken precedent over Tool since they wound down promotion for 10,000 Days though they never fully stepped out of the limelight since they toured fairly consistently in the past decade. With all that in mind, Fear Inoculum has on business being this good and, by all means, I should be more self-conscious about making such a stereotypical mid-30’s white guy choice for my #1 record but, damnit, this record rules. Sure, there isn’t anything entirely new here but even at 80 minutes this record never outstays its welcome. All the usual elements of Tool are here: machine-gun riffing, tricky time signatures, drawn out eerie passages building up into crunching guitar and bass battles, Maynard James Keenan delivering his delicate tenor throughout it all and long LONG songs that continue to grow on you with every listen. This is one of those rare records that both satisfies the loyal fanbase but also rewards newcomers. Tool have always been challenging but they’ve never actually been difficult to listen to which is really why they’ve continued to stay relevant long after most bands of their era. It’s hard to imagine them putting out another record if 10 years will be the time frame so Fear Inoculum marks a (potential) welcome final bow for them and my favorite release of 2019.