#my bf thought I was being a bit harsh but just like ??? idk maybe send Rose to a family member or something

[kennasfeverdream]

I’m rewatching sandman again and honestly FUCK the social worker lady— idk anything about how foster care works, but you’re gonna do a wellness check and not even talk to the kid ALONE?? that’s all it would’ve taken!!

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Grace

Janis: what's the name of that boy we were partnered with first day Janis: the one when we won? Grace: Craig Grace: why? Janis: that's it Janis: what's his deal, how do you know him? Grace: I literally don't Janis: you don't fuck with him? Grace: idk he's like really shy or whatever Grace: that was the first time I'd ever talked to him & vice versa so Janis: okay, well Mia banged him last night Janis: we saw her going in his room Grace: EW Grace: poor Craig Janis: yeah Janis: where is he Janis: she eat him afterwards, like 🕷 Grace: 🐍 like Grace: ugh he was cute Grace: RIP 🙏 Janis: anyway, thought I'd say 'cos obviously did it to 💔 you so naturally act the opposite to piss her off Janis: we got 📸s Grace: 🙄 duh I am the opposite, he hit me up & I said no thanks, I have the 🗨 Janis: ha Janis: send me that Grace: [does] Janis: 👍 Janis: always handy to have Grace: yeah Janis: not ready yet but can preview it when I'm done Grace: not sure I wanna 👀🍿 her snatching that sweet boy's virginity but thanks Janis: she weren't that careless Janis: thankfully Janis: you'll 👀 Grace: 👌👌 Janis: How's Els? Grace: UM why? What did you do? Janis: Nothing Janis: she fell on her arse, did she not Grace: Oh that Grace: it was no worse than when Asia dropped your bf Grace: how's your ankle? Janis: If I didn't know how thick she was, assume Mia put her up to it Janis: it's annoying Janis: need it to be better for when we get back Grace: literally so many 🐕🐩 to walk, what would you even do? Janis: exactly, can make loads in holidays, those 7 hours free really add up Grace: I'd offer to help but so can I 👶🍼 Janis: I'll survive Janis: take one of Billie's old chairs if necessary, get them to pull me along Grace: 😂😂 Grace: ask Mia what shifts barista boy is down for, maybe he can help Janis: in theory worth it Janis: but she'd probably be weirdly smug about her knowing instead of me Grace: true, just ask him Grace: 🤞💜 Janis: ain't sharing my pay Grace: he'd totally do it for free cos he's SO 😍😍😍 Janis: yeah yeah Janis: that'd fade well fast when faced with 6am and dog shit Grace: Hello?! He gets up earlier than that to serve ☕ and clean bathrooms Janis: we've all got very glamorous lives Grace: 🙄🙄 Grace: HIGHKEY should tell Craig to get tested but like I don't want him to think I'm 💔 Grace: ugh Janis: slip a 📝 under his door Janis: - a concerned citizen Grace: so retro Grace: love it Grace: idk if I even have any paper?? Janis: we have to do some exit survey bullshit don't we Grace: do we? Grace: EW Janis: mhmm, already planning my constructive criticism, obvs Grace: @ Mr Lucas what are you even doing here?! SO GROSS Janis: pretty sure he's following me Janis: fair, did cut the two spare ties he brought (??) in half Grace: OMG! you've literally saved someone's life tbh Grace: he's that creepy Janis: reckons we've got full term detention when we get back Janis: so sorry I foiled your plan, definitely wanna spend more alone time with you, sounds good Grace: 🙄🙄 Grace: so sorry you're short & gross & single & mad about it, hun Janis: if mum actually makes me go, it'll be my 🩸 on his 🧤 and her 🤲 Grace: she won't even Grace: not for that long Janis: 🤞 Janis: if all he cares about are the holes in all his 🩲 and not finding out what else I did, then she won't be as pissed off as she could be Grace: what else did you do?? Grace: also EW for that visual, babes Janis: 🤫 Janis: you didn't have to touch 'em Grace: you've literally made it even easier for him to touch himself, excuse you Janis: 😂😂 Janis: 📸 that for the online burn book Grace: can he get enough hate to retire please?! so over what a freak he is Janis: ain't we all Grace: maybe he won't be able to take us for any more activities thanks to the wardrobe malfunctions you caused 🤞🤞 Grace: 🙏 Janis: could be his day CANCELLED 👌🍆💦🥴 Grace: STOP Grace: I don't wanna see 🍆💦 applied to him EVER Janis: it'll stop him being so 🤬🤬 on the bus Grace: the breakfasts here are literally gross enough the 1st time around, can you not make it come back up!! Janis: yeah, pretty rough Janis: that'll be why the gals have been skipping, yeah 😏 Grace: 🙄 Grace: Don't even, she wants me to Grace: I don't have the energy to fight with her about it even after eating, sorry not sorry, babes Janis: no wonder she's taken to spreading STIs Janis: wanna take out as many people as she can, that one Grace: idk what goes through her head, 1st barista boy, now Craig Grace: thank god if I was actually 😍 she'd clearly have no idea Janis: he's not the worst looking Grace: barista boy? DUH Grace: we all see your 😍😍😍 hun Janis: I meant Craig and you know it Grace: like I said, he was cute Janis: shame he's now 50% likely to have the clap Grace: I'll write him that note, it's been forever since I did a good deed Grace: 🙏😇 Janis: nan be 💃 Grace: maybe now she'll love me 🤞🖤 Janis: she loves no one but dad and the LORD Janis: allegedly on that last one Grace: as far as she's concerned they were basically the same person so Janis: where was his dad, tbh Janis: maybe he was 1/3 Janis: 2/3 now Janis: 👶🏾👻 Grace: 🤷 Janis: she'll ask the lady at church who can talk to spirits, that's what she was on about to mum last I heard Janis: gonna stay in touch now he's dead, clearly Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: I won't be taking Craig to 🙏 his STI away then Janis: cute date idea Grace: IKR?! Grace: so tragic that we'll both have to miss out Janis: 💔 be a trip to the clinic with Mia instead Grace: more like a solo trip Grace: she's already forgotten that boy Janis: poor, poor David Janis: what fond memories is he gonna have looking back Grace: 🐍🐁 Grace: but that's a v relatable mood, this trip has been the WORST Janis: has it? Grace: not for you, obvs Janis: just remembering that one where you pissed yourself and then cried the whole time Janis: it's at least one up on that Grace: EXCUSE YOU Grace: literally don't bring up that you've ever known me, thanks so much Janis: there's no selling that storyline, sadly Grace: there so is Janis: the name's a dead giveaway Grace: & it still wouldn't be the wildest rumour ever spread Janis: reality is boring in comparison to what they can cook up Grace: duh Janis: go ahead and have a go then Grace: 🤷🤷 there's enough rumours about you & your bf rn Grace: it'd get swallowed faster than poor Craig 💔 Janis: what's the best one you heard then Grace: they're literally all so cringe Janis: go on Grace: 🙄🙄 Grace: no thanks Janis: 🎈🎉💩 Grace: it's bad enough I have to 👀 you IRL I'm not trying to gossip in 🗨 too Grace: try Mia or El Grace: they can't get over your 💖 life Janis: 'course they can't Janis: 💔💔 real devastated Grace: mhmm Janis: Ella should be buzzing Janis: but seeing Mia 😢 makes her 😭 Grace: she's too 💔 her fake injury didn't work & yours is real Janis: she can have it Janis: fucking stupid Janis: if this trip weren't a waste of time before Grace: you should totally forget about doing whatever if you wanna get better for hols Janis: doing what? Janis: it's not like we've done anything that taxing Grace: sure but anyway Janis: I can't spend any more time doing nothing Grace: like you said, we already are Janis: you know what I mean Grace: yeah Janis: maybe we'll go do something else Janis: idk Grace: you've got like the perfect excuse not to be under Mr Lucas' 👀 so Janis: I do, might make him join in though Janis: 'cos he hates us Janis: and then I just get bored Grace: OMG stop giving me gross visuals Janis: ?? Grace: anything involving him is like traumatising Grace: he needs to stay on the side lines, thank you Janis: bit harsh Janis: he's northern, not a monster Grace: 😂 but not even Janis: 😏 Grace: whatever Grace: it'll be over soon Janis: the trip? Janis: well observed Grace: duh not gonna kms over breakfast Janis: thought you meant my 💘 Grace: Mia wishes Grace: everyone else will obvs be 💔 Janis: give 'em a good thing Grace: they have so many #s and there'll be more when you dump him Grace: it'll keep everyone busy no matter how many boys she 🐍 and obvs me the freedom to 😢 and wet myself on this trip too so Grace: love that Grace: thanks, babes Grace: 🙌💜🙌 Janis: sounds like a wild time Janis: you are welcome Grace: sure Janis: enjoy your watersports, like Grace: 👌👌

[sowhatgguk]

protect my heart - myg

REQUESTED: #25 w/ yoongi - “why don’t you understand?”

it’s been sitting in the drafts for a while, but since school has started and work isn’t as hectic, i decided to post this before i forgot. i have one more request, it’s coming soon! send in more through my ask :)

WARNING: um idk i don’t think it’s that angsty but if you’re very emotional this can be kinda sad? yoongi!bf, heartbreak, mentions of cheating and sad stuff i guess 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

You stare at the message, wondering if there was something wrong. But you figured it was due to stress, so you ignored that feeling. Making Yoongi angry wasn’t something you planned to do.

You’d head to the restaurant and pick a few of his favourite things. Just to make sure he eats and sleep well at the studio. And then you’d head home. As much as yoongi hated being bothered, you knew you had to take care of his health. Sometimes, he doesn’t know his limits.

You spend time around the house watching television, checking social media and then taking a shower to get ready. you make sure to put a mask on your face before heading outside. No one would suspect you, everyone wore them in this cold weather.

But as you approach bighit’s company building, your cellphone seems to weigh heavy in your pocket. You push aside your thoughts, you were here to take care of your boyfriend and not annoy him.

You knock lightly on his studio door, the bag of food feeling heavy. You place your ear to the door, not hearing a thing. Maybe he’s sleeping? You think to yourself not before slowly opening the door.

What you see hurts your heart. Yoongi is sleeping on the couch cuddling a girl. You don’t even know her, or understand why she would be in his studio that close anyways. Maybe she replaced you.

You quietly place the food on a small table, being careful not to make a mess with his equipment everywhere. You spot a small piece of paper and pen. You write a small note to yoongi.

Hey, I noticed you fell asleep and I didn’t want to bother you and your friend. I got your favourites, make sure to warm them up. I wanted to make sure you’re eating well and sleeping well. I’m glad. Please don’t stress yourself, and take care of yourself yoongs. Because I won’t be able to do that anymore. I love you.

Y/N

in the midst of your shuffling, the noise caused yoongi to stir. You met his horrified gaze once he realized his position. He carefully tried to get up, but you gave him a sad smile.

Goodbye Min Yoongi.

You place the pen down onto the table and quietly closed the door. You walk to the elevator when you hear his footsteps. So you decide to take the emergency exit stairs 5 flights down.

You’re biting your lip, fighting your tears as you bolt down the stairs. Not bothering to be quiet, you pushed the exit door with all the energy you have and book it to your car. You lock the door, trying to breathe.

You rub your face with your hands, not caring if your makeup was ruined. The space between you and him get evidently smaller, and your lungs constrict. A panic attack.

You laugh bitterly. Getting all riled up because of a man. You promised yourself that you would never let a man affect you like this. But you never thought that man would be min yoongi.

Your hands shakily reach to press the START button to rev the engine. You see yoongi burst out the back door, frantically looking for you. He spots you crying in your car but before he can run to you, your car is leaving the parking lot. Leaving him behind.

You force yourself to turn up the radio to drown out his yelling. You refuse to be foolish. Perhaps you did have some dignity; call it pride. You had enough of people manipulating you, using you as if you were there for pure convenience.

But deep inside you knew, you would let min yoongi hurt you again anyways.

“Fuck.” Yoongi curses as he makes his way back into the building and walking into his studio. By the time he opens the door, he sees that the girl is gone, just like you. He decides to open the bag of food you got him, refusing to let your hard work go to waste. Even if he did lose you.

Your note is like a warning sign for him. But he reads it. And his heart crumbles in pain. Suddenly, the thought of eating food didn’t seem appealing anymore. He falls back onto the couch crumpling the piece of paper in his hands. And for the first time in a long time, he cries.

He lets out harsh sobs as he blindly reaches for his cellphone. He reads the texts you sent him and his grip tightens.

He wants to call you, and tell you it was a misunderstanding. He wants you back. That he needs you and loves you.

But one of his downfalls is confrontation. So he doesn’t. He leaves you alone. Leaving him to swallow his pain by working on his new track and drinking liquors til he passes out.

He doesn’t remember how long he’s been in the studio. But his body can feel it. So when somebody opens the door, he winces at the intrusion of light.

“oppa! You need to leave the studio, it reeks. Gah! Did something die in here?”

He merely turns to face another of the producers. She’s scrunching her nose at the sight of him.

He turns back to his computer, adding a few touches here and there. He hears her sigh and the door closes.

Within minutes, she comes back with namjoon, seokjin and a bottle of febreze. He gives her a confused look as Namjoon and Seokjin practically manhandle him out of the studio.

“Oh my Lord this is fucking nasty, get him out.” She says with a pained look as she sprays the whole studio.

“Hey! My equipment! I haven’t finished the track! Let me back-“ he yells as she slams the door in his face.

It’s quiet. He knows what he looks like. A pathetic mess.

“Yoongi-ssi.” Seokjin calls him, but he doesn’t meet the elder’s gaze.

“Hyung, what happened? You never work yourself this hard. You should go home.” Namjoon softly suggests as he shakes his head.

“Home? The studio is my home. Not like I can go back to the dorms.”

“What do you mean the studio is your home? What about y/n?” Seokjin inquires and at the sound of your name, he loses it.

“I cannot go back to her. I lost her hyung, don’t you get it? She fucking hates me because I broke her heart.”

“What exactly did you do wrong?” Seokjin softly asks as yoongi felt his heart constrict.

“She brought me food a few days ago. I was working on the new track. I fell asleep on the couch.”

“She got mad at you because you were sleeping?” Namjoon says confused meeting seokjin’s look.

“Yeah, she found me sleeping on the couch… with another girl.”

There was a dead silence in the room, but all Yoongi could hear was his own heart beat pounding.

“Who is the girl, Min Yoongi?” Seokjin has a subtle glint of anger in his voice as he muttered

“intern. She was bringing me coffee and we were talking about stuff and she told me to take a break. So I lied on the couch but in my sleepy mode I pulled her onto me.”

“Well she’s fired.” Namjoon sighs to himself, rolling his shoulders back to alleviate the back pain.

“She shouldn’t be engaging in things like that with coworkers let alone idols. But the question is; why did you let her?”

Maybe because I was missing you. So I could take love from anyone who offered. So why couldn’t I take it from you?

“I-i don’t know. But I have to fix it.”

“She just slept on top you, right? You didn’t sleep with her… right?”

Namjoon looks afraid to ask, probably because he was the closest friend you had in bight aside from the maknae line.

“I didn’t… but I almost.” Yoongi whispers as he hear seokjin mutter curses under his breath.

“Well I don’t know what to tell you Min Yoongi. You lost the best thing in your life because of your carelessness. Your inability to accept people into your life. So why are you upset when you keep pushing her away? You need to set fucking boundaries when entering and being in a relationship. So you either chuck your pride and make it up to Y/N or you fuck off and leave her alone. Either way you still need to apologize to her.”

Yoongi bites his inner cheek as he processes the information. He had to apologize to you, but how? Surely it’s too late, a week has already passed.

Namjoon softly nudges yoongi which shakes him out of his reverie.

“It’s better late than never, hyung. Go to her.”

For the first time in a long time, yoongi left the studio and left the building.

It’s been a week since you’ve seen Yoongi. You just assumed that things were over, since he hasn’t made an effort to contact you. His silence and lack of response just shows you that she means a lot to him.

You sigh looking at the empty tub of coffee flavoured ice-cream. Maybe you’ve sulked for a bit now, but it’s time to stop. There were things to be done, eventually.

There’s a knock on your door. You furrow your brows in confusion. You weren’t expecting anyone, did you order something online?

You open the door without looking at who it was. It was yoongi, drenched, looking like he came back from the dead a week later.

“Yoongi? What are you doing here?” You say with arms crossed. You could let him inside, but part of you wants him to suffer. Also, if you were to let him inside, you would be vulnerable. And knowing your emotional state, you wouldn’t be rational and probably just take him back without batting an eye.

“I’m so fucking late and I’m sorry. I- I just need to talk to you, please Y/N. I-“

fine. I should probably let him in before Mrs. Kim 5 doors down starts to become nosy.

“Whatever, just don’t make the floor too wet.” You say opening the door wider, watching him carefully place his shoes and hanging his coat.

He follows you to the bedroom and you give him a towel to dry up in the bathroom. While he does that, you pull a pair of his clothes that he left behind and give it to him. He smiles back in gratitude but it turns out to be a grimace.

You go to the kitchen to make some tea. As you’re pouring the tea in the two mugs, you spot yoongi walk out with bare fare and a towel on his shoulders. Your heart beats at the sight of him, so maybe you’re not healing as fast as you wanted.

He sits at the chairs you’ve planted near the countertop. You both quietly drink, allowing the background noise of rain to fill the room.

After a while, he speaks.

“I don’t know how many times I will apologize to express myself, but I know none of them will make things better. You might not even forgive me, and that’s something I have to live with.”

You decide to look at anywhere but him. Maybe if you saw the emotion in his eyes, it would become more surreal.

“- but I can’t ask to be back in your life regardless if I don’t give you an explanation. And I know I don’t deserve to be in your life after this. Not as a boyfriend or even a friend.

But basically i was distancing myself from you, because I was stressed, I didn’t want it to affect our relationship but-“

He lets out a bitter laugh, looking into his cup.

“-Turns out I did more than that, didn’t I? And what you saw was basically this intern I’ve been teaching her the ropes at bight. She told me to take a break, since I was working for too long. So when I lied on the couch, I reached out for her hand and she fell on top of me.

I don’t know why I did that. Maybe because she reminded me of you. That I enjoyed someone taking care of me no matter who it was. But that was it, I didn’t sleep with her. But, I mean I could have. I don’t know what I was thinking.

But I understand why that would make you feel betrayed. I’m so sorry Y/N… I pushed you away when you were trying to just offer me your heart.”

“Yoongi.” You call out as he wipes his tears with the back of his hand.

“You really broke my heart. Not just seeing you with her but the fact that you went to anyone but me.”

“But I’m here! I’m saying sorry and that I still love you. Why don’t you understand?”

“What do you mean I don’t understand? I did more than understand, I never bothered or smothered you. I gave you space. I allowed you to be by yourself and a space to talk things through. If anything, you don’t understand. You don’t value our relationship or me, min yoongi. Who goes to say later you won’t do something worse?”

Yoongi looks helpless, but you avert your gaze. You walk to put your glass in the sink. And when you turn around, he’s on the floor. Kneeling at your feet. On reflex, you bend down to his level offering a hand.

“You don’t need to kneel, yoongi. Save yourself the embarrassment. Get up.”

He shook his head, frame trembling with each word he spoke. “I can’t lose you, i refuse to let you go. I know you won’t forgive me, because of all the shit i’ve done but please don’t leave me. I can’t, you can’t make me please.” 

You stare at his pathetic frame for a while, memorizing his features. sure, he didn’t sleep with her. but not to say it wasn’t his fault. who am i to be angry with her when he pulled her on top? but do all people deserve second chances? won’t i be regarded as weak and naive?

“I can’t make you leave. I can’t make you stop loving me. But I can protect my heart, which is something you failed to do. I’m sorry, Min Yoongi. I would say to give me time, but i don’t know how long that will be. And you’re a busy man, with a life filled with success you won’t have time for me.” 

Yoongi looks at you with bloodshot eyes and nods. He turns to leave as you follow him to the door shakily. Before he steps outside, he turns to face you. His lip starts to quiver, and your heart breaks. 

“can i ask a favour from you? just one more time?” he meekly asks as you nod. 

he slowly reaches for your arms, and you let him touch you. you want to feel his embrace, but it feels different this time. and when he gets closer, you close the gap. a farewell kiss.

and ever since that shared moment, you don’t see min yoongi ever again.