#my emotional support projection character

[shrimpari]

GOOD DAY EVERYONE! A few days ago, the silly little indie game I've been working on the last couple years launched! If you're into mother-like JRPGs with an emotional story and silly antics, please check it out! The game is on Steam, the Switch, PS5 and the Epic game store <3 My primary role on the game was character animations and character designs! Thank you to everyone for your support! I'm really excited to work on the next project.

[kkoct-ik]

yttd spoilies

im still not over how sou could have been The Best My Favourite did representation ever except its not canon and it never will be because nobodys understanding of did extends further than split personality trope. heem heem

[desperatepleasures]

tbh am very fond of the acespec zoro I've created in my mind who is willing to have sex if and only if it is nasty and kinky

[perilegs]

ok i might need to force myself to not romance astarion bc i don't want to know what it says about me to turn down karlach, the woman of my dreams, the character made to cater me personally, like, if she was real i'd bring the moon and stars down for the chance to see her smile, she's everything i've hoped for in a rpg companion, what does it say about me if i turn that down for someone like astarion

[an-inspired-eternity]

and as we move through life to find our place in the crowd.. (some don’t make the cut that’s crystal clear!) oh, isn’t someone keeping score? i’ve gotta say this out loud! i mean, do we really need ANOTHER zero?

@xulips this is your fault /lh

[castielmacleod]

Let him heal from his own issues or else <3

[kuntblogging]

The thing is people who write asexual cas dont do it in the way thats true to his spirit. Asexual headcanons in general are usually a “hes sooooo innocent awuiaoddhsj” or something along that line and well you just dont get it.

[sailxrmxrs]

hello it is i, your resident fantasy au enjoyer anna reporting in with yet another fantasy fic. giving rory the fantasy au treatment bc the beloved boy deserves the beloved au hehe. filled with some of my favourite tropes too bc i've been reading a lot of books to fuel the brainrot. i am suffering (in a good way). for today's instalment of the fantasy aus, mc and rory are informants working undercover for the queen in search of a rebel faction. very important very exciting. oh and part of the whole undercover thing is they're pretending to be married. everything they do is fake and pretend. no real feelings whatsoever. simply a falsified display as part of their cover story. nothing else at all. lmao kidding they're madly in love but won't admit it. secretly pining but also definitely not pining. only the most delicious brainrot being served here. enjoy. also a note that there's some mild violence/injury towards the end but nothing too wild.

A hum of jovial energy filled the crowded tavern, its dark oak tables crowded with patrons and piled high with empty tankards. There was no shortage of celebration that night, the townsfolk spending their hard-earned coin on whatever ales and meads the tavern staff had to offer. The booming shouts and cheers of the rowdier patrons, along with the thrum of general chatter from the more reserved of tables provided the perfect cover to divulge one's secrets; cautious whispers were nothing in their wake. And who would ever suspect the quiet couple sitting in the corner, nursing their drinks as they intertwined hands across the tabletops. Who could ever assume that those glazed eyes and withdrawn smiles were anything other than the expected behaviour of newlyweds drowning in the other's presence, entirely numb to the world around them. Surely such an unsuspecting pair could never be working undercover for the queen with directives to root out a faction of rebels seeking to overthrow her reign. Yes, as much as you hated to admit it, pretending to be freshly married to your colleague had proved to be the perfect cover story. Where before someone might suspect the lone ranger shrouded in the shadows of their cloak, no one paid a second look to the couple with stars in their eyes nor did they doubt their intentions. If only you had been assigned the task with a more agreeable person.

Rory was not the worst of your potential partners for such a mission. Of the other informants of the castle, Rory was one of the best at his job but his hamartia was his disagreeable personality. He was all stern looks and entirely too serious. For most, there was a time and place to let your guard down or shed the hyper-awareness that being an informant entailed. Not for Rory. Even in the privacy of your company he remained as high strung as ever. Still, despite his hardened exterior you would happily accept Rory over some of the less pleasant options. Especially given the fact he'd proved himself to be exceptional in the role of doting husband. Even tucked away in the corner of the busy tavern, his hand was wrapped in his. He hadn't paused the gentle back-and-forth of his thumb against the back of your hand since arriving. It had taken some getting used to the way his movements synced with yours, mirroring every step with expert ease. Now the tender touches felt almost like second nature. Almost. You were treading a fine line here, precariously walking atop a wire looming over a deep abyssal pit. Getting too comfortable here would only end in the coldest of pains when the job was done and you returned to the castle and continued as normal. There was no doubt that once you'd finished receiving ample information and had reported to your superiors that Rory would go back to acting as he'd always done—as though you didn't exist. It wasn't anything personal. That was just how Rory was. He'd explained one night that he simply didn't care for upholding relationships when his job meant that he was putting his life on the line with every excursion beyond the castle grounds.

While his reasons were understandable, it didn't make Rory's apparent disdain for casual conversation any less vexing. When you'd tried to spend a few minutes savouring the plate of hot food before you, Rory had instead leapt straight into strategy discussions, admonishing you for your lack of concentration. He'd grumbled to himself when you quipped back that you were focusing perfectly fine on monitoring the comes and goings of tavern patrons. Rory quietened on the matter, opting to trust that you weren't letting yourself grow complacent even in the seemingly uneventful night that descended upon the tavern. Nothing seemed out of place nor concerning, though that was no excuse to let your guard down.

"Everything seems clear tonight. Tomorrow we should make our move for the next town over," Rory instructed as his eyes focused on you, a perfectly composed smile on his face—it looked as though it came as naturally to him as breathing.

"Works for me. Although I believe the morning market could be a veritable source of information. We might be able to find a lead or two if we're lucky."

"I suppose replenishing a few supplies couldn't hurt either," Rory replied. He let his gaze flicker to the tavern door every so often, each look only lasting a split second before he returned his attention to you.

Looking over the drained remnants of your tankard, you let out a yawn. "Should we perhaps retire to our room for the night? We'll need to be up and out around sunrise if we want to do one last scope of the area." Rory nodded in agreement, stepping out from the booth and reaching for your hand to help you up. He guided you through the crowd, a protective touch on your waist that tightened whenever someone edged closer. He truly pulled off his role excellently. Almost a little too well. If you didn't know better, you'd be beginning to suspect that this was all practiced behaviour with a loved one back at the castle. Still, wherever he learnt it didn't matter, just the fact that he was convincing enough to everyone around the both of you. By the time you returned to your shared room, sleep was lurking ever closer. So close, in fact, that you barely even registered each beat of movement that led you into the bed, Rory following close behind. Part of the pretence of being married meant being confined to the same room and same bed, though traveling together had left you both desensitised to it all. Still, it didn't make you any less flustered waking up to Rory's nose a hair's breadth away from yours. Luckily he always rose after you, giving you a precious few moments alone to compose yourself. Appearing anything less than composed would no doubt earn a scathing remark from Rory.

Morning arrived in what felt like no time at all, the sun peeking over the rolling hills of the horizon. Sunlight poured over your skin, gently warming it in the morning chill that struck in those early hours. The town streets were mostly quiet save for the early risers setting up their stalls before the bustling marketgoers arrived. Rory was surveying one half of the town while you searched the other for anything out of place or anyone that arose suspicion. So far all seemed to be in order, although there was no telling who might show their faces when the streets were bustling with people, believing that the crowds could hide their nefarious intentions. Upon reuniting with Rory, he shared his own lack of activity outside of the expected. It was then, as Rory detailed the plan for the day, that you recognised a face across the market square. It was undeniably the exact man who'd disappeared from the castle grounds just two weeks ago without a trace save for the correspondences to an unnamed individual sitting in the ashy remnants of his fireplace. Most of it was indecipherable, fire having burned away the words but there had been one singular letter that remained unscathed enough to arouse suspicion. And seeing him in this part of the kingdom only incriminated him further.

"No sudden movements. But I just found us our biggest lead yet," you informed Rory, as he slowly turned his head to follow your line of sight. Recognition settled over his features, alarming concern creasing his forehead.

"If we're recognised we're as good as dead. We find higher ground and keep eyes on him at all times. Wait until there's more people around before tailing him. Crowds make the perfect cover."

"Then we better move and move fast. He's turning this way." Urgency rang in your voice, eyes searching for the most conspicuous way out.

"You trust me?" Rory whispered, offering no other context.

Slightly bewildered by the sudden question, you faltered for a moment before answering. "Well, yes. But I don't see what—" And then Rory's hand was on your waist, the other cradling your chin as he leaned so incredibly close. His breath was warm on your cheek, though that could have easily been your face burning under the close proximity. Then his lips were ghosting over your jaw, the frame of his body concealing your from any onlookers. If anyone spared a glance all they would see was an amorous display between unidentifiable lovers. The seconds dragged like hours, your heart pounding so hard in your chest that you feared Rory might be able to feel it. Of all the pretences you'd put on together, this was by far the most daring. He hadn't gone further than a tight grip on your waist or the press of a kiss to your temple. His lips were barely touching your skin and yet you could feel electricity striking your skin for every moment he lingered. Not to mention the way his hands held you firmly in place. It was all so dizzying you were dangerously close to forgetting exactly what your mission here was.

"Coast clear?" He asked, every whispered word brushing your ear with a delicate softness that almost made you forget who you were.

With a nervous clear of your throat, you managed to look past Rory's shoulder to find your target with his back to you once more. "We're safe."

There was roughly another hour before the marketplace would open to its customers, meaning there was an hour of waiting before you and Rory could set your plan into motion. After the close encounter, the two of you had separated from the other's embrace just enough to move out of the square and into a quiet alley. From there, you'd made your way to the rooftops, using a thick stone chimney to keep hidden from sight. It wasn't difficult to keep an eye on your target, his own movements clearly purposeful so as to blend in with the other market stall owners. Anything that made your job easier was a welcomed turn of events. That was, until Rory decided to strike up conversation, clearly deciding the threat level was low enough to break the deafening silence.

"You've been oddly quiet all morning. What's going on in that head of yours?" The question felt more like an accusation—a weighted statement so as to draw out every thought that swam in your mind.

"Normally you're complaining I talk too much and now I'm too quiet. What do you want from me, Rory?" Your reply sounded less relaxed than you'd intended, residual nerves shaking your voice a fraction.

"You're avoiding the question." He folded his arms, stubborn to a fault as he stared you down. "Ever since we saw... Wait, this isn't because of what I did earlier is it?"

You felt your cheeks begin to heat and could only pray they didn't betray you. "What? No! I'm just focusing. Much like you should be too."

"Don't think I don't know you well enough now to not know when you're lying. I would've told you what I was doing if time was on our side but it was either I act fast or we get ourselves caught. Still, sorry about that."

You blinked, noting the rise of colour that seemed to appear on Rory's cheeks. It was faint, but you could've sworn it was there. "It's fine. You did what anyone should have done in the moment so don't apologise. Just took me a little off guard is all."

Rory relaxed a little, grateful he hadn't crossed a line or backed you into a corner you weren't willing to tread. Then, a rare smile grew as he tested just how far he could push you. "Don't tell me you got nervous. One of our finest informants and fighters in the branch and you got a little nervous over your partner getting too close? Thought you were stronger than that."

"Brave words from a man who was just blushing as he apologised. Really changed your tune there, didn't you? Still, it's of no matter to me. Think whatever you'd like to get yourself through the day."

"What I'm hearing here is that you wouldn't have reacted at all if I'd kissed you?"

You glared back at Rory's testing smile, hating the way your stomach twisted. You knew you had to choose your next words carefully, the thought of being caught lying already bruising your ego. "Who knows. Not like you had the gall to do it anyway."

"Oh? Is that a challenge? Or perhaps an invitation?" Rory edged closer, running a finger along your jawline before taking your chin in his hold and angling your face so that you couldn't avoid meeting his gaze. No words were spoken, just heated stares as though you were waiting for the other to crack first.

"Neither. It's a 'we better move or else we lose our lead'," you uttered, hand moving Rory's face so that he could see your target weaving through the crowd. Rory cursed, leaping up and into action. This was the first time you'd seen him taken by surprise and if you weren't in pursuit of a traitor to the crown, you'd be taking great joy in that fact. Weaving through the side streets, uneven bricks beneath your feet slowing your pursuit, Rory called an instruction from just ahead.

"We split up here. You continue on and I'll take a left down here. We surround him and wait for his contact to show up. Out of sight unless absolutely necessary."

"Sounds like a plan. Don't get yourself caught, beloved husband." Rory did little more than roll his eyes before running off down a side street, leaving you to continue down the cobblestones in the direction of your target. The road led to a series of seemingly abandoned buildings. Infrastructure was beginning to crumble in places, its inhabitants long gone for an undeterminable amount of time. There were no visitors to this side of town—the ideal place to rendezvous with one's conspirators. From the shadows, you had a clear sight of the man you'd been pursuing. He was speaking with someone you did not recognise, their face shrouded in shadow from the hood atop their head. Whoever this person was, they were doing little to conceal their desire to remain anonymous to any onlookers. Curious suspicion grew in the pit of your stomach, aching to edge closer so as to be in earshot but even one step forward could lead to being discovered. Across the way, you caught sight of Rory hiding from his own shadowed vantage point. He was closer to the suspicious characters and, hopefully, able to garner some useful information in the process.

As you crouched in the shadows, attention honed in on your target, you missed the person quietly approaching you from behind until it was far too late. When you heard their footsteps and twisted, dagger in hand, they were already upon you. The hilt of their own dagger collided with your chin, throwing you off your balance and striking the alarm of your targets. Shouts sounded along with heavy footsteps, no doubt your biggest lead making his escape. But that was not your greatest concern right now. What mattered more was finding your footing and fighting off your assailant.

"Didn't anyone teach you it's rude to eavesdrop? Suppose I'll have to be the one to do it then," he threatened, a sinister smile growing as he crept closer. He had the advantage of preparation on his side, but you weren't going to go down that easily. Your opponent was strong but you were quick, able to dodge his heavy handed attacks and strike any opening in his stance. Whoever he was, his grasp of strategy was weak, leaving far too many openings for you to kick and slash. That was, until you went for another opening only for his thick boots to strike your stomach and sending you crashing to the ground, winded from the attack. He loomed over your body, preparing to go for the kill with an arm raised until a throwing knife struck his wrist perfectly. Before you could dwell longer on the matter, you rolled to your feet. Rory was at your side in seconds and matching your stance.

"Took you long enough. Did our culprit run off?"

Rory chuckled, the sound devoid of any genuine humour. "He tried. Didn't get very far. Looks like you didn't do much beside almost get yourself killed."

"I had the situation under control, thank you very much."

"Sure you did. Were you just taking a nap on the ground then?"

You glared at him before lunging to deal with your attacker. You made quick work of him, his movements having slowed greatly thanks to Rory's expert aim. "You know I could just as easily throw this at your face to shut you up."

"Don't threaten me with a good time, beloved."

Once you'd taken care of your attacker and quiet settled over the scene once more, your pulse finally returned to normal. A series of aches ailed you, though none were cause for concern. It was nothing some rest wouldn't fix up. Whenever you had the freedom to rest, that was.

"You okay?" Rory's voice dropped lower as he came to stand in front of you, carefully inspecting you for any serious injuries.

"All good."

He raised an eyebrow, not fully trusting you were being completely honest with him. "This isn't one of those 'I'm going to be stoic and pretend I'm fine and then later I try and tend to my very much not fine injury' moments is it?"

"First of all, mildly offended. You're not entirely wrong, but I'm still mad about it. And second, no this is not one of those moments. Just a little tender in places. I can walk it off." Rory contemplated his next move as his eyes dragged up and down your frame.

"I swear if you even think about carrying me anyway I won't hesitate to cut the first appendage I can reach."

He raised his hands in innocent defeat. "Consider my thoughts blank, no carrying considered. Anymore."

With a roll of your eyes, you made to walk away until Rory's hand grasped your wrist. There was an earnest look in his eyes that you'd never seen from him before. He didn't speak for a moment, glancing at his feet before meeting your gaze once more.

"I'm glad you're okay. You worried me there for a moment." Sincerity laced every word he uttered, so quiet and heartfelt and only for your ears.

"Don't worry, you won't be left partnerless just yet." You tried to lighten the heavy atmosphere that had descended but Rory's expression didn't change. You'd seen him look serious, of course, but this was something else entirely. It was like a layer had been stripped back, shedding the wall he presented to the world and revealing another version of himself. One that allowed his weaknesses to be presented on full display. One that deeply trusted his company so much as to bear his every worry and burden without fear. It struck you to your very core, keeping you rooted in place and barely able to breathe let alone move.

"Good. How could I play the role of doting husband if you got yourself killed?" A gentle smile breached the final crack in his walls and let what remained of that outer shell come crashing down. A hand reached to cup your cheek, every callous and scar that marred his palm decorating the sensation of his gentle touch.

"I'm sure you'd figure out a way. Not that you'll need to just yet."

"Yet? I hope you're not planning for some martyr-like sacrifice. It would be unbecoming of you." Rory brushed a stray strand of hair from your face, smiling to himself as he no doubt felt the way your skin heated with the featherlike touch of his fingertips.

"We'll see." The words were so quiet, barely audible to either of you if not for the pindrop silence that had settled. There was no tearing your eyes away from Rory's, feeling yourself stumbling into the vast green that gazed back. This certainly wasn't the behaviour of two individuals pretending to be married. Not when the nearest person was far beyond the winding streets of the bustling market town. There wasn't a single soul to witness the display, and yet that didn't stop either of you from remaining there, both unable to tear yourselves away. Perhaps that would be the smartest thing to do. Feelings were messy; they got in the way and complicated matters to an incomprehensible degree. But maybe, just once, you could give in to the magnetic pull that reached into your heart and tugged. Just once wouldn't hurt, would it?

Clearing your throat, you tried to pour even an ounce of conviction into your voice. "What's the plan now? Find our man and get some information?"

"You're the boss. But first, there's another, more pressing matter to attend to." Rory didn't bother to offer any verbal clarification when your eyebrows knitted in confusion. Instead, he twined his fingers with yours, pulling you closer until his face was mere centimetres from yours. Every breath and blink felt like an eternity until that painfully small gap finally closed. Rory's lips was soft, tentative as they explored new territory. There was no going back from this but you didn't care. Maybe you should walk away and preserve what little remained of your self-restraint. Maybe you should continue letting yourself believe this was all for the sake of your cover. Or maybe you could enjoy it just a little while longer, believing the lie that every action leading up to this moment had been faked when every part of your soul said otherwise. Though nothing felt more real than this very point in time, Rory's gentle touch the only thing keeping you on the ground.

"Tell me what you're thinking," he whispered as his thumbs brushed the backs of your hands.

You shook your head, knowing there was no way you could even begin to string the tangled mess of emotions into coherent sentences for him. Another fleeting touch of a kiss was all you could offer before breathing in a deep sigh. "Words aren't quite enough to explain it. That, or I'm just a little too distracted to think of them right now."

Rory laughed, a beautiful sound that caressed your ears with each lilting cadence. "I think that's a first for you. Being rendered speechless, I mean. Cute."

You pulled your hands from Rory's and glared, only making him laugh harder. "Make fun all you want. I'm not the one making moves while on the job."

"Isn't that what this whole job has been? Me making moves and pretending I don't enjoy it as much as I do?" To say that was a loaded comment was an understatement. And it was one you could dwell on later under the cover of night where Rory would be none the wiser to your seemingly permanent flustered state of being.

"Ignoring that for now. We have actual work to do. Lead the way before I make you."

"Is that supposed to be a threat? Or a promise?"

[disembodieds]

sayaka………

[dragonslayer26806]

I know elquackity is just an act and actual qquackity has been kidnapped I know they are just playing. But why is it when they are mean to each other it hurts me more than it hurts the years I have been bullied. Why does it hurt, it’s fake. It really hurt when they just yelled and insulted him, they canonically don’t know that he blew the party up, they only supspect him. Can someone give this man a support system please. Like Borge elquackity and qquackity.

I understand elquackity is bad but am I also projecting my fear of being left alone if I do something wrong? Yes yes I am. I just feel horrible when they are mean to each other.

[ectoplasmer]

finished (or at least got through part of the epilogue party in) bg3 today and ough. i’m going to be tormented by thoughts of post canon inula and astarion aren’t i

[magicofrobin]

lyric analysis of wide eyes by badflower and how it fits jason todd's vibes. long post incoming. (tw: implied/referenced sa, character death)

starting with the pre-chorus and chorus rather than the lyrics from the verses because these are the most easy to understand.

PRE-CHORUS ANALYSIS.

my innocence was taken / i'll never be that boy again

the first line is the loss of his childhood. unlike other children he witness violence and addiction at home, as well as around his neighborhood. he took care of his mother and slowly watched her die because of her "illness". he lived on the streets after losing both of his parents (the grief for his mother was like a knife, the space where his father used to be was filled with relief). jason wasn't allowed to be a child, he grew up too fast because he had to. it was the only way for him to stay safe. for so long he lost that childlike innocence that tells you that the world is good and your parents will always love and protect you. he saw the world through the eyes of an adult when he shouldn't have had to; in an ideal world someone would've shielded him from this. from all of it.

it can also be used in the same context as the song, which has been interpreted as being about sa. in that sense his innocence was taken when talia manipulated him and brought him into her bed when he was under her care. in that sense it was about the blurred out faces and half remembered hands from his childhood.

the second line, to me, is about his death. he's not going to be who he was before, no matter how much he wants to. he can't go back. he's changed too much to be that boy anymore. he doesn't even view that boy as him anymore, it's easier to think of robin as someone else, as a ghost, than it is to admit it's him. jason todd and robin might be one and the same in reality but not through the lens of his trauma. this can even be seen in canon, when he's reliving his death and disassociating. he sees himself at fifteen, dying on the warehouse floor, being between to death, and he calls him robin, not jason. because it isn't him, not really.

i guess i'm only speculating / but there's no use in hearing the truth from a liar

this one is less specific but to me, it's about how he feels like the other bats don't trust him. mainly how bruce doesn't trust him. it feels like no matter what he says or how much he works with them, there will always be the sense that none of them trust him. if he says he won't kill then he's lying. if he says he's fine he's lying.

he has lied before. many times in fact. that was what red hood was in the beginning, a lie spun to hide his identity until he was ready.

CHORUS ANALYSIS.

true was the bride at the turn of our time

in the song the bride is referring to the catholic church, with that context, i think this line for jason's character is a bit hard to interpret.

but to me, it feels like it's about bruce's crusade and his time as robin. things were good and he believed in everything bruce stood for when he was robin. after his death nothing is the same, least of all him. he no longer believes in batman or his methods, the life he lived under bruce's roof is no longer true, it hasn't been since he ended up in that warehouse. it's almost like a loss of faith.

holding my, holding my / holding my life in your body

this one is obvious & not so obvious. there's different things it could mean but the most in your face one is: bruce finding his son's body in the wreckage and holding him, wishing that jason would open his eyes. it's so reminiscent of the every image of bruce finding his son in death in the family; jason’s limp body in his arms, him the picture of the devastated father.

its batman protecting his robin when they're out on patrol. jason's full trust in his dad to keep him safe. every night out as robin was a risk and bruce was always there beside him, pulling him back when it was too dangerous or picking him up when he was too hurt or too tired to carry on.

its jason holding a gun to the joker's head and demanding his dad make a choice: him or his murderer? one of them was going to die there and it was all in bruce's hands, whether he wanted it or not.

it was the way the batarang sliced his throat and sent him stumbling, releasing his murderer so he can grasp at his throat. a timer is about to go off and he's trying to stop the bleeding. this was his dad holding his life in his hands and choosing wrong. this was jason keeping himself alive, the only person he could depend on anymore.

in a meta sense it's the poll that killed him. his life hinged on the votes of fans. he would live or die based on whatever they called in and said. they held his life in their hands and voted against him. voted to see him dead. voted to see batman's world shatter with the loss of a child. they could've saved him.

i bottled up the pieces of the lie, of the lie

it's about putting his past behind him, or trying to. it's the distance between him and the rest of the bats. he's not part of them and his time with bruce was a lie, it wasn't real, that wasn't his family. he thinks he knows that now. he was replaced, they're happier without him. so he keeps his distance and he keeps all those feelings inside until they spill out and he's confronting a bat and it gets explosive. because he does want to be part of the family, he wants his old life back even if he can't have it.

its about all the things talia told him while he was healing and training. the whispered half truths that she used to manipulate him, so he would become a more willing pawn. she told him about tim and twisted it, told him that bruce never loved him, didn't even miss him. jason's body had barely been in ground before a new kid was going out in the colors that killed him. she doesnt tell him how his dad was self destructing, how tim thought he had to step in to keep bruce alive, how tim was just a kid taking responsibility for a man so lost in his grief he took it out on the world. she tells him how his death has gone unavenged because no one cared enough about him to avenge him.

she doesn't tell him how his dad almost killed the joker, he would've too. he was going to put his rules behind him and rid the world of his son's murderer. but superman stopped him (there might have been valid reasons but does it really matter?). she doesn't tell him how dick wanted the joker dead as soon as he heard about jason's death, how fucking outraged he was that bruce was letting him sit in arkham instead of six feet under. she doesn't tell him how dick beat the joker to death for him and tim and barbara and the only reason he's still alive is because bruce brought him back. she doesn't tell him that he was loved.

everything she's says is lies wrapped up in a thin layer of truth and he takes it as gospel because why would she lie to him? she's in charge of him, she saved him.. right? she should have no reason to lie to him.

who am i, who am i / to ever love you with wide eyes?

so much of this song is about his relationship with his dad and how it's changed since he came back to life. he's not the same kid he was, he's angry and wrong and he hates bruce for replacing him and for letting his murderer go on living. there should be no love left for him to give. but there is. there's enough left that it has him coming when his family calls and agreeing to nonlethal methods, anything to make his dad happy, to make his dad love him.

jason doesn't feel like he deserves to love anyone, least of all the family he doesn't fit into. he's the extra puzzle piece, one that came from another box and was so obviously out of place there was no mistaking it as part of the bigger picture. just like jason is with the family.

this line is him quite literally asking himself if he's allowed to love bruce now that he's broken all the rules. is he allowed to still think of him as his dad and want his love if he's not part of the family anymore, if he's not robin anymore.

going into the verses now, this part might be more select lines rather than the entire verse. we shall see.

VERSE ONE.

my love was only temporary / i aged, but kept the memory / and still it makes me shiver cold

this is all about losing the two most important parental relationships he's ever had and how it'll never stop being an open wound.

he had three years as robin, as bruce wayne's son, he knew it wouldn't last forever. he was so loved during those years, he wanted it to be forever, he wanted to know what it was like to grow up happy. but he died and he lost it. to him, the love he experienced then died with him. and now, as red hood, he knows it has. all he has left is memories of a time when he was happier and it's mostly his fault. it keeps him up some nights, nights where he's alone and nightmares won't let him sleep and he wakes up in a cold sweat wishing he could slip out of bed and walk the hall to his dad's room, seeking out comfort like he used to.

it's losing catherine when he was so young. it's the constant desire for more time with his mom that he'll never get to have. no matter how old he gets he'll always be that little boy shivering and laying beside his mom, hoping she'll wake up.

if i really wanted to, i could also tie it back to talia honestly. she made him feel loved so she could mold him into a pawn and then she betrayed him in the worst possible way. jason will never forget what she did and she will star in those nightmares that wake him up at night.

theres no place to hide the past we bury / so like the virgin mary / she lied to save the family

for the most part the latter part of this line is about catherine to me. it references how she tried to shield jason from the worst of things. she told him she was sick, not an addict. her drugs of choice were medicine to make her better, not the things actively killing her. she lied to him to spare him, to save him.

the first line is pretty on the nose to me. try as he might jason will never be able to run from his past – whether that's being robin or living on the street or being raised in an abusive household or his time spent with the league. nothing is gonna be able to hide it. even six feet of dirt wasn't enough for him to be rid of it.

VERSE TWO.

i am the dust behind the window / the darkness in the shadow / the stain under the pillow

the most standout line here is the darkness in the shadow because that's what he is, isn't it? he's the dark spot on the otherwise clean history of robin. (it means nothing that every robin has had their problems, none of them are innocent, but jason will bear the curse of that alone.) and when he was first starting as red hood, he was hiding in the dark and going through with his plan for revenge. no one knew, or could've known, that jason was back in gotham. he should've been dead, he should've been a ghost.

the first line is referring to his memorial in the cave. the suit he died in – that should've been destroyed, it never should've been kept, it just like robin should've ended with jason – is displayed behind glass. the suit is all that's left of a ghost.

and i'll be the perfect silent witness

this is a bit more of a loose interpretation than some of the other parts but this to me would be referencing the deal he makes with bruce about not killing in gotham. his attempts to repent and be the son bruce wants again.

i stink from all the bullshit / so feed me and i'll hold my tongue

the first part of this is similar to some of the things i've written about jason's internal monologue. where he's thinking about how he's not able to rid himself of where he grew up, like his neighborhood left a permanent stain on him. it's something he felt most intensely when he was attending gotham academy. he felt like the students and the teachers could smell the stink of crime alley on him, that they knew he was not from the same kind of people, that he was only there by chance – not by birth.

finally to finish up, here's the bridge which is so so fucking fitting.

BRIDGE.

rage! / i'm the bad guy, i'm the bad guy / i'm the cynical kid, i'm the rage

this is red hood. this is all red hood is. all of jason's anger wrapped up in a neat little bow and hidden under that helmet of his. he makes himself the villain in the family. he kills people even though he knows it breaks his dad's number one rule and it'll make it so he can never be part of that family again.

he comes back so disillusioned to bruce's methods because he knows! they don't work! gotham is still just as bad as ever! there's no way the city will ever get better if someone doesn't start cleaning up the streets and laying down rules and getting rid of the worst of the worst. which is what jason does.

as a kid he wasn't full of so much doubt. he genuinely believed he was making a difference but now he knows better.

i'm the big lie / i'm the goddamn shame of the goddamn pride!

jason todd was the good soldier! the plaque on his memorial says so! but that isn't true now is it? no, jason was the soldier who wouldn't listen in the end, who turned his back on the cause when he was shown the truth.

he was the angry one, wasn't he? that's what everyone wants to believe.

jason todd the good soldier. jason todd the angry robin. the robin who was always destined to go down the wrong path. it's true because bruce said it, isn't it?

his past is all hidden behind the lies of a man he still calls dad. he warps the memory of a dead boy to suit his needs, ignoring the truth of jason's life because it makes his death easier to deal with. it makes his return and his crimes easier to deal with.

because he's batman's greatest failure. his soldier, his fault.

he's the bat that makes them all look bad. he wears their symbol and he kills people. he thinks he's something that they're all ashamed of (and maybe they are. maybe he deserves that for what he's done.)

rage! / i'm the bad guy, i'm the nice try / i'm the typical bitch with the rage on my face!

pretty much the same as the first part of the bridge but i want to focus on the i'm the nice try part. because i feel like it reflects thoughts on his life and death. his time as robin was cut short but he did good during it, didn't he? he helped the people of gotham and he did so much good but it wasn't enough.

and then his death! it didn't stick! his resurrection is basically the universe's way of saying nice try! not even death could stop jason todd.

i'm the goddamn beast of the goddamn pride!

this!

jason is the member of the batfamily that's willing to go further, he's capable and ready to kill if it means protecting his city and his family. he's the violent one now and he accepts it. that's his role in the family now.

[bahablastplz]

SKZ Recs (NSFW)

As a chronic fanfic reader, I have a lot of recommendations. So, these are the ones I think about the most. All of them include smut, so they're 18+. Red text indicates fics on AO3. Go support these amazing authors!! Enjoy!! <3

Bang Chan 

The SKZ house @writeonwhiskey (Chan x reader x Hyunjin…SKZ but make it a frat… and also sexy) 

Silent cry @j-0ne25 (Fake dating/friends to lovers, live laugh hurt comfort… emphasis on the hurt) 

Love is intuitive @skzonthebrain (forbidden love and angst… so emotional and loving <3) 

Kinktober Day 8 @dreaming-medium (breeding, best friend, fake dating, so sweet and spicy) 

Summer in Seoul @writeonwhiskey (strangers to lovers, summer love, spicy and romantic) 

Saturday mornings @skzdarlings (Chan/reader/Seungmin where Seungmin is an absolute menace that gets reader in trouble… dom Chan is so good in this one omg) 

It’s cold out @therhythmafterthesummer (roommate Chan is going through his rut… oops there’s more ABO on this list than I realized sorry not sorry) 

Bodyguard: The first guard @skzdarlings (A sequel to the bodyguard, an ongoing work that has elements of enemies to lovers and great, in-depth world building and character development)

However you want it, lover-lover @cbini (you ask your bf Chan to step on you after watching spicy edits of him on tiktok omg)

More than just friends @kwanisms (roommate Chan is entering his rut... he's usually able to control himself but this time you're ovulating. sprinkle some brat taming in here as well and it's so delicious)

Lee Know 

The Experience Project @leeknowsallyoursecrets (Enemies to lovers Lee Know, really good plot and relationship building!) 

Sanguis Limerence @jl-micasea-fics (Vampire OT8, Lee Know x Reader x Chan, SUPER good world building, especially in their sequel with the backstories… I was so invested. And it’s super hot)

Barb Wired Brat @roseykat (BDSM Lee Know with reader going into subspace… awakened things in me) 

Audience @gimmeurtmi (2 min, wet dreams, exhibitionism, degradation… yeah) 

Well Shit @2chopsticks2eyes (Brother’s best friend, inexperienced reader, enemies to lovers and fwb… literally so good) 

Sea May Rise, Sky May Fall @skzms (Lee Know x Reader x Han, complete series, Pirate AU with beautiful world building, in-depth characters and GREAT smut. One of my all time favs)

rsvp @cbini (teasing dom vampire boyfriend Minho and you get the punishment you deserve... brat taming and so so so sexy like it's insane)

Changbin 

 The accidental acquisition of sugar @skzdarlings (accidental sugar daddy Changbin x reader that’s absolutely hilarious with great smut) 

Valentine’s series ‘do you really think you’re in a position to give orders’) @skzdarlings (forbidden love/romeo & juliet style but with gun play… um this was so hot tho) 

Close your eyes (...And count to seven) @MysteryBird (Possessive gang leader bf! Changbin that you’re trying to piss off by sleeping with the other members… 100k+ words and so delicious) 

Hyunjin 

Praise kink Hyunjin @dreaming-medium (A kinktober fic, enemies to lovers detective Hyunjin… absolutely delicious) 

Snowed In @moonjxsung (really artistic, heartfelt, and beautifully written)  

Jury’s still out @straywrds (rivals to hooking up/hate sex… super spicy and hot) 

Dressing down @jl-micasea-fics (shopping trip with best friend Hyunjin turns out spicy ahh the chemistry) 

Four of wands @straywrds (beautifully crafted story I was so immersed in!! witch Hyunjin and sex magick, the characters have so much depth! crazy tension)

Han 

Watch your six  @dreaming-medium (sensory deprivation kinktober ah this is engraved in my brain) 

The same but different @skzdarlings (ahh hanlix fairy au where they’re linked with great world building and is so funny… I maybeee think about this every day) 

Sea May Rise, Sky May Fall @skzms (Lee Know x Reader x Han, complete series, Pirate AU with beautiful world building, in-depth characters and GREAT smut. One of my all time favs)

Screen Identity: Mismatched Passion (SIMP) @leeknowsallyoursecrets (Spin-off series to the experience project! Jisung x reader enemies/academic rivals to lovers in which they’re both anonomously sexting each other on discord without knowing who’s on the other end of the screen!!! top tier level tension)

Felix 

The bodyguard @skzdarlings (Forced proximity, enemies to lovers, had me SUPER invested and made me cry) 

The same but different @skzdarlings (ahh hanlix fairy au where they’re linked with great world building and is so funny… I maybee think about this every day) 

Snap out of it @2baabbies (Felix gives you the option to either go home with your shitty boyfriend or go home with him at the end of the night ahhh!!) 

Seungmin 

Bet on it @skzonthebrain (Academic rivals, enemies to lovers and such good tension/chemistry) 

Audience @gimmeurtmi (2 min, wet dreams, exhibitionism, degradation… yeah) 

Saturday mornings @skzdarlings (Chan/reader/Seungmin where Seungmin is an absolute menace that gets reader in trouble… dom Chan is so good in this one omg) 

Seungmin + hairpulling @straykeedz (kinktober fic, best friend Seungmin finds out you have a thing for hairpulling and can't get you out of his head... this is taken straight from the deepest depths of my fantasies i s2g)

no nut november @gimmeurtmi (this whole nnn series is fantastic but seeing Seungmin lose his composure because of his breeding kink does something for me)

august is a fever @seungminheart (mean dom Seungmin... you don't think he is really into you so you see how far you can push him/I love mean dom Seungmin and I think this fic does it just right)

I.N. 

Lavender boy @hyunsvngs (A/B/O Alpha jeongin… super sexy and great dynamics) 

Clueless @jeongin-lvr (inexperienced big dick I.N. that just wants to make reader feel good… also omg he’s so hot in this pls) 

Better and better @seungminheart (sharing a bed, best friend Jeongin, amazing banter, soft dom Jeongin, brat taming, every trope from my hopes and dreams)

Third leg? @beesspacedotorg (huge dick alpha Innie... some brat taming, great banter and dynamics and sexy)

OT8 

Sharing a bed series @skzdarlings (Best trope ever and they really do it justice) (Chan's is linked but you should read all 8)

Sharing is caring @skzms (Minsung x reader x OT8… really well written spice) 

Fake texts @thefantasyden (I swear these are like crack I read them every single time) 

Kinktober23 @roseykat (one of the first SKZ blogs that I started reading that really brought me deep into the fandom… My fav from this is Table Manners and Bible Studies, and it has a part 2)

All Bark no Bite @doitforbangchan (Main pairing is Chan x Reader with some OT8, it's an ABO au with some really good spice)

Masterlist

[kiki-strike]

(Valley of the dolls on repeat) good how are you

[fondcrimes]

the "labru chapter" is the kabru chapter

this is a dungeon meshi love manifesto, but not in the way you think. sorry not sorry for the labrubait

what makes chapter 76 so amazing is kabru’s desperation has little to do with laios specifically. it’s not just about kabru being obsessed with laios and making sure he doesn't cause tragedy, either. I think this chapter emphasizes kabru's struggle with the concept of love and companionship. the point of this chapter is that every critical part of kabru collides at once and renders him useless.

(disclaimer: this post includes a lot of projection/speculation but it's to understand kabru's character arc i promise. for clearer analysis and examination of how kabru's ideologies are constructed, check out this really great post)

kabru is a lone visionary

in ch 76, kabru’s threatened by lycion exposing his true intentions to laios not only bc he wants to prevent laios from joining marcille in her destruction, but also bc laios is also from a short-lived race and kabru needs an ally in his power struggle against elves (esp when the chips are down)

but has kabru really accepted his need for allies in his plight? kabru has spent his adult life suppressing a human urge to connect meaningfully with others. he even keeps rinsha et al. at arm's length in the name of achieving his masculine hero complex/survivor's guilt goals. he's already quite disillusioned bc most adventurers don't have the same goal as he does. so he uses people and gets on their good side for systematic support. he’s well-intentioned and takes care of his party. but the idea that an ally could also protect HIM and make HIM feel safe as well doesn’t really register with him until later on in the narrative bc camaraderie and allyship, at its core, is about acknowledging intimacy. kabru struggles with intimacy sub-textually (his self-neglect and social insincerity) even though he knows how to simulate it to gain others' trust.

but he can’t crack laios, he can’t get him to listen. for lack of a better word, kabru is spoiled by the fruits of his superb perception and emotional intelligence. he also doesn’t cope well with failure (bc his goal is too valuable to ~not~ devote himself to) he puts too much value in conquering laios and when he thinks he's failed, he basically crashes out. the real problem is he still doesn’t understand his true feelings--not feelings for laios, but the root of his desire. the root of his goals and the endless search for companionship.

kabru is a strategic historian

at his core, kabru is a storyteller. he tells himself a variety of stories about his trauma and his goals, which serve as motivation and to some extent, self-protection (as shown in his conversation w mithrun). he deeply understands the role of storytelling in regards to the construction of history and drastic shifts in power.

as an utayan, he understands that the tragedy that overcame his people was not random, but resulted from elven negligence of a disenfranchised people. it is imperative for kabru to cement himself as a voice for otherwise voiceless people. in his story, he has no choice but to handle the hero, if not become the hero himself.

kabru even has a story about his pursuit of laios, mainly that laios is currently the most capable person of defeating the mage and that he must do whatever it takes to ensure laios doesn’t fuck it up. his instincts are right, sure, but at first, he places special value in laios’ capabilities that almost seems unearned… like yes he’s studied the island adventurers with frightening expertise, so it makes sense he would have a good idea about who is the most equipped to succeed. but his early suspicions of the toudens seems to complicate my perception of his knowledge by adding emotional depth and a layer of tinhattery so to speak.

canonically, kabru has been rebuffed by laios multiple times (which is so... lolll) when he's talking with his party, kabru hides behind the excuse of dungeon but he’s been trying to get his attention this whole time. to me it reads like he's got a bruised ego from being ignored and is being a hater about it (so real lol). it's funny bc kabru is usually great at taking shit from others (esp elves) if it means nobody suspects/interrogates his true intentions and he can keep the peace. so why does laios tick him off so bad? now we have to get into the psychoanalysis of it all!

kabru is a cynic

first and foremost, kabru’s cynical philosophy about humans is challenged by the touden mission. but plenty of people don’t care about the impact of their actions, so why does kabru obsess over the toudens at the start? I figured kui changed gears with kabru's characterization following his introduction, but I want to try to connect it to kabru's unresolved survivor's guilt. kabru is the sole survivor of a catastrophe caused by negligence and oversight. he criticizes the negative impact of the toudens' generosity and naïveté and confirms his cynical worldview (the road to hell is paved with best intentions), but still maintains a level-headed perspective. on the other hand, kabru's interactions with laios are tinged with irrational jealousy/resentment/desperation, even prior to kabru learning laios' character/intentions as an adventurer. I cannot emphasize enough that I am employing a neutral definition of jealousy here--it seems kabru is jealous of the freedom to not care the way laios does not care about the fate of the island. this isn't to say laios doesn't care about humans, he does, but he seems so singleminded compared to kabru esp in ch 76. kabru sees laios going to the literal end of the world to save his sister. laios gets to be human selfishly, kind-natured but ultimately self-prioritizing.

kabru correctly assesses motives (besides his own maybe). falin said she’d do anything to protect laios and marcille. laios has been socially rejected by people his whole life, and at first, he only cares about his sister and monsters. kabru has survived horror but only by accident… he doesn't agree with their pov and more importantly, it doesn’t exactly compute with him. the toudens are wholly unaware of their impact, which does not sit well with kabru at all, who understands the impact of negligence better than anyone else, esp how it ends up harming the less fortunate and extremely marginalized in society. it's reminiscent of the age-old trolley problem. while kabru has been the victim of senseless pain, I suspect kabru can’t yet make sense of senseless love. he gets to look down at their cause and call it selfish because it directly contradicts his lived experience.

kabru is an ethicist with a heroic streak

it's easy to glean that kabru wants to be the hero utaya should’ve had. while he's hardcore and intense, but not paranoid enough to do something rash. he uses violence as a means of achieving peace. he's self-aware enough to know his skill limits, which seems rational at a glance but the pressure he puts on himself suggests he views himself as inadequate until he achieves his goal. the races of humans are so split up and he sees that this is a matter of power first and foremost.

with the canaries, kabru submits to political pageantry to make a separate case for innocent people. senseless tragedy is unforgivable, but so is the "too little too late" reality of the canary system. he takes on the impossible task of rallying people together to save the dungeon. one read is that he's saving his childhood self from trauma perhaps by saving those like him… he's wishing someone did something before it got bad, wondering why nobody intervened when they had every opportunity to step in. it’s deeper than a sense of duty or fairness, this is about betrayal and retribution.

throughout his life, kabru struggles with the material inequity and limits of love. the human population is fundamentally segmented into a hierarchy due to lifespans and access to power/resources. his mother was the only one who loved him in utaya and she was ostracized because of his appearance and then she was killed due to senseless tragedy. his frustration with the elves encapsulates this idea perfectly, because he is aware of of the limits of their empathy as a long-lived race and adjusts his strategy and rhetoric accordingly. I think milsiril’s love for kabru is genuine, but still infantilizing and smothering due to the racial imbalance. this continues to inform his politics, as he views their perception of short-lived races with contempt. the worst offense is that their bigotry is nonsensical, meaning their hearts cannot be reasoned with.

dungeon meshi is a story about power and politics, yes, but genuine love and acceptance are the catalysts of change and equality. the "invisible gulf" that marcille is referring to is the inability to view other races with love and care. such is the essence of camaraderie. kabru's backstory, family history, and beliefs/motivations raise two important questions for me: who gets to be loved enough to survive, and then to thrive?

kabru is a monster

the emphasis on distinguishing between humans and monsters is quite interesting too. of all sentient beings, who qualifies as worthy of "human" treatment? who deserves empathy and acceptance? kabru seeks these answers to fix the world, but also to justify his place in it.

kabru's lack of self-worth is evident here, but what’s more interesting is he knows many humans suffer worse fates than some monsters. the dehumanization/neglect of fellow humans does not compute, if the premise is humans are superior to demi-humans/non-humans because mutual empathy and understanding. he clings to the superiority of humanity as an appeal to ethos to those in power despite what he might actually believe about himself. to kabru, the true injustice is that humans won’t even save “inferior” humans despite being the same. his unclear heritage manifests as guilt, as he feels directly responsible for his mother's suffering because he is monstrous. then here comes laios, a human who somehow can find it in himself to love monsters.

kabru doesn’t want laios to love him, per se, but laios’ love for monsters and for falin reveals life-altering possibilities for kabru: there is a world where someone could love him even if he were a monster. there is a world where somebody would go to extreme measures just to save him. kabru does not know the extent of laios' trauma but recognizes a sort of kindred spirit but inverse. taking off the ship goggles here--it has less to do with laios specifically, and more to do with what his beliefs/abilities represent for the trajectory of the world (because kabru studies how beliefs/abilities manifest into material reality, after all)

kabru is seeking the power of love

in a different story, kabru would be laios’ archnemesis. they would have a disastrous battle of opposing worldviews in their struggle for dominion. kabru has every right to want to take laios out bc while his affinity for monsters is sympathetic and even charming, it is still a natural threat… kabru has the true hero pathology. he believes he only deserves to live if he can save people for a variety of reasons/traumas. he should do whatever it takes to exterminate laios. but the expectation is subverted in chapter 76 bc we see kabru’s curiosity and ongoing quest for understanding win over his worst fears.

I feel like I’ve been projecting a lot but bear with me... a huge part of kabru’s character is him trying to figure out how to matter to people, or figuring out why people matter to others in general. it’s not to say he doesn’t matter to his friends or milsiril, but why else would he bother with all the manipulative people-pleasing? it would be less meaningful if he had ulterior motives like greed or power, but he plays into people's expectations/desires for a disastrously noble cause. he’s still actively living in his trauma as a deeply traumatized adult. it’s pure serendipity that laios can send him right back to his past and then pull him right out again. I don't think it's crazy to say kabru (correctly) projects a lot of shit on laios bc he doesn’t know how to deal with those injustices and barriers between people himself.

this is also why I believe kabru's beef with laios is as personal as it is strategic. we have to consider the trajectories of their character arcs (their big missions, respectively) in relation to one another as foils. if laios' love for falin can move mountains and do impossible things, kabru is subconsciously drawn to the magnitude of that love like a magnet. his response to cognitive dissonance is quite remarkable as well. at the root of his unbelievable capacity for understanding and curiosity is the deep wound of being unloved and unprotected. kabru does not avoid or run away from his fears, he quite literally keeps running toward them and follows it down to hell. he wants to identify the true source of his deepest wound.

to me, this omake connects his childhood curiosity to his search for love, almost as to ask “is there enough room for me to be loved?" and the same can be said for marcille's character arc/ backstory. her biracial heritage has caused her great existential pain and social isolation.

in dungeon meshi, the issues of protection and justice continue to be interpreted through love. if kabru were to go back in time and save utaya, he would’ve needed incomprehensible magic, a supernatural power to save himself, his mother, his hometown. in contrast, laios' mission to save falin is just one manifestation of the surreality of love, all of the impossibilities it permits. the touden party wade through invisible gulfs to save falin, but also each other. kabru doesn’t hate their story, he just can’t fathom it yet.

kabru is a skilled strategist and communicator. and does not listen to his heart or body until he’s absolutely forced to do it. he has insane goals and expectations for himself and will go to great measures for those goals. as cerebral and cold as he might seem, it’s critical to understand that his character arc is about love too. in my opinion, it’s almost as if he’s trying to change his reality in hopes of finding love. my favorite thing about kabru is that he has all the narrative makings of the perfect misunderstood villain who self-destructs at the end of the story. but kabru is too smart for that, too focused on the big-picture impacts and the historical trajectory of the cause. instead, kabru finds the wherewithal to stand down once he understands that laios is capable of loving humanity like he does, or that he could help him see the value in humanity at all.

to love is to understand, and then to surrender.

[exuvianen]

dating hc's with dr. ratio, aventurine + blade!

headcanons about what these hsr men do in a relationship witth you <3

cw: x reader, gn! reader (no physical descriptions), mostly fluff, sfw, headcanon style

notes: hsr brainrot… ahahaha... i hope i have a fairly good grasp on these characters and wrote them well. 

wc: ~1050 words, around 350 words per character. all under the cut!

feel free to drop an ask or to add on to my thoughts! likes + rbs are appreciated  <3

✎ Dr. Ratio:

He likes parallel play, or being alone together with you. He works on his own projects, like grading papers or writing a new thesis while you’re doing your own thing, like playing video games or reading. Occasionally, he might ask you for your input, such as ideas about his next thesis or what pose he should sculpt himself into next. 

He has a spare desk and chair for you in his office. You can choose to do work or entertain yourself there when you visit him and he’s still teaching a lecture, but feel free to take a nap on the plush sofa he bought just for you. 

He will nag you about your health but in an annoyingly endearing way. He fusses over you, telling you about appropriate attire for today’s weather, offering you an umbrella, and reminding you to drink water. 

He entertains all your ideas, no matter how silly or illogical. He’ll hear you out on anything you say, though he might have some very strong disagreements or objections to your ideas, especially if they are silly or completely nonsensical. However, he never turns you away when you bound up to him with a mischievous gleam in your eyes - he just sighs and prepares himself mentally to hear whatever goofiness comes out of your mouth. 

He’s your biggest cheerleader, supporter, and advocate. Though he may come off as intimidating, he is always willing to help advance your career or work. He has many connections and vast knowledge of the universe after all - why not utilize them for his beloved? 

He’s very good at dispelling any irrational thoughts in your head. If you’re panicking and your mind is disoriented, he’ll sit next to you and hold your hand gently, but firmly to ground you. He doesn’t speak at all when you vent out all your frustration, confusion, or anger - rather, he’s silently contemplative and then asks questions when you finish talking. He’ll indirectly guide you to a solution while gently calming you down as he dispels those pesky thoughts from your head.

He makes a custom alabaster head for you. 

♤ Aventurine:

A big fan of matching accessories and clothing. You don’t need to wear the exact same outfit, but he likes wearing complementary colors and jewelry to yours.

If you’d like, he’d be more than happy to bring you to casinos and public events with him. He wants to show off to you and let you witness his wit, talent, and skill like a peacock presenting its colorful feathers. 

He likes it a lot when you trace his skin through the spade-shaped hole in his outfit.

He hates the feeling of being vulnerable, but he likes being around you. This creates conflicting emotions inside of him. Oftentimes, he doesn’t know how to deal with it and just lurks by you. Pull him into a hug to quiet the voices in his head. 

He will send you packages or luxury items from the planets he’s visiting. You’ll be greeting a disgruntled Topaz or IPC soldiers at your door as they hand you various gifts ranging from limited-edition jewelry to flowers that bloom only once every 200 amber eras. He gifts extremely grand things, but he always knows how to find things that suit your tastes.

He’s a big spender on you. If you’re unused to the amount of money he’s willing to throw at you, he’s going to give you a lot of “exposure therapy” with his generosity. He’ll invite you to private auctions, lavish galas, luxury boutiques, and high-end jewelry stores. He’ll start filling your wardrobe with tailor-made clothes with the excuse that you should match his outfits when you attend formal events together, but his clothing contributions eventually infiltrate your closet pretty deeply. 

He enjoys being pampered and pampering you. Self-care nights are a must - as a representative of the IPC and one of the ten Stonehearts, he has to keep himself presentable and looking sharp, and that goes for his partner too! He’s more than happy to spend money to fund your trips to the salon or buy you any beauty products to use at home. He’d love to put on face masks together and share a drink or two with you. 

☠︎︎ Blade:

If you want to, and Elio’s script permits, he will bring you along on missions to safer planets. He’ll drop you off at a commercial district - feel free to go shopping or try out some novelty food while he wraps up his Stellaron Hunter business.

He likes getting his hair brushed. One of his favorite activities is sitting down and letting you comb through his hair after he cleans up from a mission. It’s an activity that leaves him vulnerable, but he doesn’t mind if it’s with you.

He’s an acts of service kind of guy. He moves to take your bags before you even say anything, holds open doors, and pulls out chairs for you. Brings you a cup of water and some fruit when you’ve been working for too long, and silently drapes his jacket over you when you shiver.

Tell him you like a certain pastry and he’ll show up every day and bring some. Show him a picture of a pretty flower and he’s boarding a spaceship to bring the flower to you personally. If you want something, he’ll do his best to get it.

He’s pretty quiet, but he’ll remember everything you say, what your preferences are, and what you like. He secretly writes it down in case his memory gets murky, and he’ll often reread his notes to remind himself.

He gives simple but traditional gifts to you, such as jade bracelets and pendants, and combs and hairpins if you have longer hair to wear or use them.*

He’ll treasure anything you gift to him. If you make an accessory for him, he wears it at all times. If your gift is small enough, he’ll stow it safely in his pockets and take it everywhere with him.

If family is important to you, he’ll send funds their way and ensure that they’re taken care of. 

As someone who’s often dead and then undead, his body can get stiff. He’ll enjoy it immensely if you massage him, and accompany him for his daily stretches and calisthenics. Even if you just hold him for a while, he finds that his muscles will relax from the warmth emitting from your body. Therefore, he quite appreciates having you physically near him.

* Combs, hairpins, Jade bracelets, and pendants were given as tokens of love and affection in Ancient China. These gifts have a deeper meaning/symbolism, but for the sake of post length, I did not write them all out.