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mrsamaroevans · 3 years

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TIGHTROPE PT. 2 | MIGUEL GALINDO

Fandom: Mayans M.C.

Pairing: Miguel Galindo x Female Reader. This follows from: Tightrope.

Request: Yes!

Words: 4,052.

Warnings: English is not my first language, so, sorry if there are grammar mistakes or if the redaction is poor.

A/N: Guys, without joking, I’ve been writing this since the first part was posted and that was nearly a year ago lol. But it’s finally here and I hope you like it! *Gif is not mine*

|| MY MASTERLIST ||

“Never sure, never know how far we could fall”

The past eight months, Miguel never felt so out of place like he was feeling by day four you were out of the house. He’s been feeling so bad not only emotionally because you were not with him, but physically ‘cause he started to catch a cold. His meetings with Potter were frustrating him even more and he was more tired than ever to have meetings with Los Olvidados or the MC.

He took a look at the last months of his life and he knew he had screwed everything up. Miguel hated himself for that; not Potter, not Los Olvidados or the MC. Him. He was the only one to blame for the situation his marriage was in.

That night when Cristobal was sick, he told you how sorry he was and promised you he would make an effort to be more at home. Two months ago, he had the chance to change the way your marriage was going and he didn’t do anything.

You’ve been together since you were sixteen. He knew about the loveless marriage your parents were living in because that was the reason why he had to work so hard for you to accept the first date. Miguel remembers how much you tried to avoid your feelings for him, how careful you were with every step of your relationship. He promised you he wasn’t going to hurt you and he didn’t. When he had to go to Cornell? You tried to break up with him, arguing about all the time he would be away with those pretty New Yorkers but he assured you, you were the only one who he could want to be with. Miguel did everything he had in his hand to make your long-distance relationship work, and instead of feeling away from him, you felt like nothing was different.

He did everything right back then, so right that when he proposed in the winter holidays of his fourth year in Cornell, you accepted without hesitation.

Why couldn’t he be like the twenty-two-year-old Miguel Galindo?

Miguel saw your face appearing on the computer’s screen and suddenly, he started to feel better. He texted you asking you to do a video call and felt relief when you accepted.

At least you didn’t want to avoid him the two weeks you were going to be away.

“Hey! How are you?” He asked and you smiled. Miguel loved seeing how passionate you were about your job, so he smiled for the simple fact of seeing you smiling.

“Fine,” you said “And you? You sound different,” you asked, a bit concerned.

“I’m catching a cold, but I’m fine,” Miguel said nonchalantly.

“There’s medicine in the cabinet of our bathroom,” you told him “You should take some before you feel worse”

“I’m better now that I’m talking to you,” Miguel said and you chuckled immediately “What?”

“You did it too soon,” you said and added when he frowned: “Trying to make me fall in your arms again”

Miguel laughed. He wasn’t trying that, he was just being honest, but now that you touched the subject…

“I know you said we’d talk about it once you come back, but…”

“And we’ll do it” you interrupted him and Miguel understood you didn’t want to talk about it at that moment “I had an interview earlier, that’s why I’m all dressed up,” you said, changing the subject.

“I think you look gorgeous,” he said, and when he saw the look you gave him, he laughed “And how did that interview go?”

Miguel and you talked about a bunch of stuff. You told him about the process of publication of your book and he listened to every single word that came out of your mouth. He didn’t realize how much he missed hearing you talk until now, and when you least expected it, you and your husband talked for three hours straight, something that hadn’t happened in so long.

“You know? This takes me back to those four years you were at Cornell” You said and Miguel nodded.

“Yeah… our old computers didn’t have this quality but, yeah, they helped us,” Miguel said and when he was about to say something else, he saw you turn your attention somewhere else.

“Oh, hi baby” he heard you say and Miguel knew immediately who was the person that walked in the room where you were “Just be careful, Lucy, please”

“I’ll come back as soon as it ends, Mrs. Galindo,” a feminine voice said and then he saw Cristobal in your arms.

“It’s okay, have fun” You smiled, and then the door got closed “You wanna see daddy? Look who’s there!” You pointed to the screen and Cristobal looked at it. A smile appeared when he saw his father and Miguel smiled as well.

“I miss you two so much,” Miguel said, feeling tears in his eyes at seeing you both smiling so wide, but, a thought he didn’t like at all came to his head.

You seemed happier now than in the past eight months and it broke his heart because he felt so alone. Every night he expects to walk in your bedroom and see you sleeping, kiss your head, —kisses you never felt— and lay at your side. But all that he finds is an empty and cold bed.

Miguel didn’t want a future without you and he knew he had to work really hard to keep you in his life.

“What are you thinking, Mickey?”

Miguel looked at his friend, he didn’t even realize he was that quiet and thoughtful. Nestor sat down on the stool next to his and looked at him.

“You miss her so much” Nestor teased once Miguel didn’t say anything.

“I do” Miguel nodded, he had a glass of scotch in his hand and when he took a sip, he realized it was already warm, so he left it aside “I fucked it up, hermano. We never had this distance before, not even when I was at Cornell… and it’s all my fault”

“Well, it’s a progress that you already accepted it,” he said and Miguel scoffed.

“At what damn moment” Miguel sighed and leaned his forearms in the bar “I feel like I’m losing her”

“She thinks the same about you” Nestor confessed, making Miguel look at him.

He should have expected it. You and Nestor started to spend a lot of time together since he was your driver. You met Nestor at the same moment you met Miguel, you were friends, it was obvious you would talk to him.

“You can’t lose her, Miguel,” Nestor told him “(Y/n) and Cristobal are the best things that have happened to you, not the cartel, not the protection you’re having from Los Olvidados… your family”

Nestor was right and Miguel knew it. Not anyone would stand his life and everything that comes with it, but you? You were there since the beginning, you never judged any of his decisions. He was so lucky to have you in his life, ‘cause people could talk shit about him, the cartel could be crumbling down, but at the end of the day, when he walked through the door of your home, you were there, welcoming him with a smile and a kiss. You were all that he needed.

“I know,” Miguel said, immediately “I have always known that, I just… I don’t know what happened, I’m trying to remember but… I can’t. I thought we were fine, I thought I was just working like before and then my son got sick and if I hadn't woken up in the middle of the night, I wouldn't have even noticed” he sighed again, summed in frustration “I didn’t want to be the absent father and husband my father was and here I am. My wife is miles away from me and she looks happier”

“Don’t you think is because you’ve been talking every day?” Nestor asked, raising an eyebrow at him “She loves you, Miguel. Never doubt about it… I’m going to the airport tomorrow for her, you wanna come?”

Miguel nodded. He would do all that it takes to bring his family back.

You had your son in your arms as the babysitter helped you with your suitcase. You missed so much your home that you were so happy that your days in New York came to an end, and for the giant smile Cristobal had, you knew he was also happy, even if he didn’t understand what was going on.

“Let’s find uncle Nestor, you’re gonna help me?” You asked, looking at your son’s face. He smiled at you and wrapped his arms around your neck.

“Over there, Mrs. Galindo” Lucy said, pointing away and when you turned around, you froze for a moment.

Miguel was there with Nestor, and when he spotted you, he started to make his way through the crowd to reach you. You didn’t know what to do for a moment, he surely surprised you ‘cause Nestor told you he had a meeting with Los Olvidados that day. You definitely didn’t expect him to be there.

“Look, baby… it’s daddy” you told Cristobal and he looked at where you were pointing “It’s daddy, baby…”

As soon as Miguel reached you, Cristobal stretched out his arms to his father, and being as happy as never in the last eight months, Miguel took him out of your arms.

You took the chance to turn to the babysitter “Lucy, thank you so much for helping me… we drive you home?” You asked, but she shook her head no.

“My brother is picking me up,” She said.

“Are you sure?” You asked again but she only nodded, “Thank you so much again… Cristobal, say bye to Lucy,” you said, grabbing your suitcase and caressing Cristobal’s back.

The babysitter smiled when Cristobal waved his tiny hand at her, and then she started to walk to look for her brother.

As soon as she walked away, Miguel used his free hand to cup your cheek and kissed you before you could object. You pulled back, frowning, and with a small smile on your face “Someone is too affectionate today”

“I missed you,” Miguel said “And I’m not talking only about these past two weeks…”

“It’s not the place, Miguel,” You told him, but stood on your toes to kiss his lips again “Let’s go home…”

Miguel held your hand the whole way home, he asked you about the flight and about your last two days in New York that you couldn’t talk.

“You’re too affective today” You whispered, looking at him and grinning when he caressed the back of your hand with his thumb. He smiled and turned to you “How’s your mom?” You asked to change the subject.

“Happy ‘cause you’re coming back,” he said “She also missed you two… I think Cristobal helps her with her treatment”

You looked back at Cristobal, who was busy playing with a stuffed bear in his car seat “I also noticed that… what did she say about the psychologist?”

Miguel sighed and you half-smiled, you didn’t need more to know what your mother-in-law thought about that idea “You know her, she doesn’t want to go to a loquero”

“Well, we knew she’d say that” Miguel nodded at your words “Maybe Dr. Kamen can convince her… I’ll talk to her, don’t worry”

Again, Miguel realized he didn’t deserve you. He didn’t know what he had done to have you in his life, you were too good to be true ‘cause even after all that distance, you were there for him, having his back like you had done since you were sixteen.

So he kissed your hand and you smiled.

When Nestor parked outside your house, Miguel leaned to the backseat to take Cristobal as you jumped off from the SUV and smiled when you saw Dita in the front door.

“You’re finally here, querida,” She said, walking to you and hugging you “How was your trip?”

“It was great,” You said, and as soon as Miguel appeared with your son in his arms, Dita’s eyes sparkled.

“Oh, mijo, I missed you so much” Dita smiled and Miguel let her take Cristobal in her arms “You must be hungry,” Dita told you and you couldn’t hide the fact she was right “Let’s go inside, lunch is ready”

That night, even though Miguel wanted to be with you when you bathed Cristobal, he received a call and couldn’t make it. You weren’t mad. You understood that besides his family, he also had other important things to take care of, also, you saw in his eyes that he wanted to fix things up. He didn’t want to lose you and you also didn’t want to lose him.

“Sorry for that,” he said as soon as he crossed the door of your bedroom. Cristobal was in his bed already and you knew he wouldn’t wake up until the morning arrives “I went to see Cristobal… he looks tired”

You smiled.

“Yeah… he was,” you said, taking your earrings off and leaving them on your bedside table. You were tired as well, you would put them to your jeweler tomorrow.

“You also are... We can talk tomorrow”

“No. I promised we would when we had time alone” You said, turning to him and patting the bed for him to sit at your side “What did you want to tell me?”

“I’m sorry” It was the first thing he said “I know I haven’t kept all the promises I made the day we got married. You’re the most amazing wife and mother out there and I haven’t appreciated you the way I should” he shook his head and leaned his head back looking at the ceiling “I used to say that I work a lot, but now I know that’s not an excuse. ‘Cause, you work a lot too and you haven’t neglected our son, our house, or our marriage… I can see it now”

Our marriage.

Those two words made you shiver. You have confronted him about Adelita’s baby and you were afraid that the words he used just confirmed your biggest fear. But he could see that in your eyes, ‘cause he started to shake his head.

“I swear to God, amor, that between Adelita and I never happened anything,” he said, grabbing your hands. There were tears in his eyes, afraid of you not believing him “I can see why would you think that and, unfortunately, I have nothing else than my word for you to believe me” you looked him in the eyes, you wanted to have proofs but how could you have them? You had to trust him “You’re the only woman I have ever love and that’s how it’s gonna be forever. You can trust me”

“I do,” You said after a few seconds “If you say nothing happened, then nothing happened”

“Nothing” Miguel insisted, sitting closer as one of his arms landed on your shoulders and kissed your head.

“Thank you for not ignoring my feelings,” you said with your eyes closed. You missed having him so close, the smell of his cologne taking you to all the happy memories at his side.

“I’m sorry it took me too long to finally see it” he got a few inches apart from you, so you opened your eyes and looked up at him. You couldn’t deny it, you were a bit disappointed for that action “And… I know this is not romantic but…” you leaned back to see him better. Miguel was nervous and the only times he was like that were, when he asked you for the first date, when he proposed to you and when your son was born “We’ve been married for ten years now, and if you want… I want to renew our vows”

You were surprised.

You didn’t know anyone who wanted to renew their votes. The only thing that you heard of marriages when you were young, was that they were so tired of being in them.

“Miguel…” you barely whispered when he got on one knee in front of you. His hand grabbed a small black velvet box from his suit coat and opened it.

“Would you like to marry me again?” Miguel grabbed one of your hands as you were still trying to find your voice “I can’t promise you I won’t make mistakes again because I’m not perfect, but I promise to always put you and my family first”

You smiled. Your eyes getting watery as you nodded.

Miguel sighed in relief and took your engagement ring off your finger to place the new one “I love you” he told you as he stood and the next thing he did was cupping your cheeks to kiss you.

You accepted his lips, leaned back, and held from his dress shirt where you looked for its buttons as the kiss went from sweet to passionate. It had been so long since the last time he touched you like he was doing it at that moment, and your heart melted when you realized that his touch felt the same as always.

But, of course, the moment was interrupted by Miguel’s phone.

“Are you kidding me?” He said, irritated at whoever he was talking to “Potter wants to talk now? Does he know what time is it?”

You sat in the bed and looked at him as he walked around the room. You bite your lower lip as you recognized Alvarez’s voice coming out of the device and from what you could hear, you knew Miguel had to leave.

“No… tell him I won’t go anywhere”

You walked towards him and stood in front of him so he could see you. Just by looking at your face, he shook his head, but stopped when you placed one of your hands on his chest “Go. They need you” you whispered.

Miguel covered the microphone and shook his head again “I got it, amor, they won’t interrupt us”

“I’ll be here when you come back,” you told him with a smile as you wrapped your arms around his middle and left a soft kiss on his chest. He didn’t understand how he could deserve someone like you “Go. It’s okay”

He sighed and gave in “I’ll come back as soon as I can,” Miguel said kissing you, before walking out of the room as he buttoned his shirt.

Your eyes stayed at the door for a couple of seconds and when you looked down at your left hand, you smiled at seeing the new ring on your finger. If you wanted a proof, that could be. The butterflies in your stomach made you giggle while you made your way to the bathroom to take a shower.

Half an hour later, you were doing your skincare routine. You had a small smile while remembering the past weeks and how you were feeling things were changing just stepping into Californian ground. It all started to feel like before and you were not even afraid that things could change for worse. What happened today was proof enough for you to be sure that you could overcome anything.

You turned to your left when you heard the bedroom door being closed. After placing all the products where they belonged, you walked back to the bedroom just in time when Miguel was about to call your name.

“What happened? Potter just wanted to say hi?” You asked and Miguel chuckled at your joke as he was taking his coat off.

“I was in the car and I realized that I didn’t care what he wanted, so I asked Alvarez to come back,” Miguel said, unbuttoning his shirt and looking directly at you “I want to spend this night with you and nor Potter nor anyone is gonna interrupt”

“Amor… I was being honest when I told you it was okay” You told him smiling once he reached you.

“I’ll deal with him tomorrow” Miguel smirked and pulled off the strip from your robe “I love you”

Your hands cupped his cheeks “I love you too”

| ONE YEAR LATER |

The sky was bright blue. There were no clouds and the weather was perfect. Miguel and Cristobal were in the pool while you watched them from the bed in the tent Miguel asked to be built. They were having fun until the little one wanted some cookies from the kitchen and as demanding as his father, he wanted to go for them.

“We have fruit here,” You told your son, pointing at the bowls on the table as Miguel helped him to take his blue lifejacket off. Cristobal pouted and shook his head no.

“I want cookies” he insisted.

“Fine, just two,” you said and your son nodded. he grabbed his father’s hand and dragged him all the way to the kitchen.

You smiled watching them going inside the house. Their curls and swimsuits dripping water as they walked. There was no doubt that Cristobal was looking more and more like his father as the days go on.

The giggles of your son became louder as they approached the tent. You looked up from your phone and saw your son with two cookies in both of his hands. You turned to Miguel, questioning him with your gaze.

The expression on his face was saying “I couldn’t do anything”

“I said just two cookies, hun,” you told your husband once Cristobal sat near you.

“I told him so,” Miguel said quickly “Tell your mother what you told me”

Cristobal smiled when you ran your fingers through his hair “Two for me and two for little brother” he looked at you and then turned to the bassinet at your side. You couldn’t stop your laugh and neither did Miguel.

“But little brother can’t eat cookies yet,” you told him.

“Can I eat them for him?” Cristobal asked looking up at you with a big smile, trying to look as innocent as he could.

You looked at Miguel who didn’t even try to hide his smirk. Like father, like son.

“Fine,” you told him “but you’ll have to wait an hour before you go to the pool again”

Cristobal nodded too eagerly probably not knowing what an hour meant, and when Miguel was about to say something, your youngest son started to whine “Hey, little man. What’s wrong?” he asked taking the baby in his arms and trying to coo him, “I know, I know. You don’t want to see me now; you want your mami”

You smiled when Miguel kissed his forehead to place it in your arms so he could eat.

Miguel laid on the bed with Cristobal, they were close to you but not enough so they wouldn’t get you or the baby wet. He was having a conversation with his son, at least, the kind of conversation a three-year-old kid could maintain, which soon started to fade away and when you looked at them, you saw your oldest son sleeping on Miguel’s chest.

“He gave up,” Miguel said with a smile when he noticed you were watching them. One of his hands was on Cristobal’s back and the other in his hair “You want to try for a girl?”

You chuckled while patting your newborn child on the back “It’s been only six days since this little one came out of me… give me two years to forget the pain and we can talk about it”

“We have a deal here” He smiled at you and then kissed his son’s head “I think he likes being the big brother”

“Yeah, he gets extra cookies” you both chuckled at that “Today was wonderful”

“Every day at your side is wonderful”

“Ugh, cheesy” you laughed and Miguel looked at you pretending to be offended.

“I’m not taking it back, because it’s true” Miguel shrugged as best as the kid in his chest let him “I love you, you know it”

“Hun… I love you too”

Miguel stood there, lying in bed and looking at you and your sons. He was thankful that you had given him another chance, ‘cause he realized by looking at you three, that he couldn’t see his life without you.

“Hand in my hand and you promised to never let go”

Tags: @luckyharley1903

|| MY MASTERLIST ||

#miguel galindo #miguel galindo x oc #miguel galindo fanfiction #miguel galindo x reader #miguel galindo imagine #miguel galindo x you #miguel galindo x female reader #Mayans MC #mayans mc x reader #mayans mc fanfiction #mayans mc imagine #mayans mc fic #sons of anarchy #sons of anarchy fanfic #sons of anarchy fandom

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juminsmysticmc · 3 years

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Pregnancy Series - ,,Spinn Off’’

RFA + Minor Trio with a MC who doesn’t want to give birth in C Section

⚠️ Sensitive content -> mention of: labor pain, blood, fluids ⚠️

Pregnancy Series: Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4.1 // Part 4.2 // Part 5 // Part 6

HEY! So, since you all liked the Pregnancy Series a lot and I still had a writing which is dedicated to birth and Family I decided to post this as a ,,Spinn off’’ however this writing was written before I decided to write the Pregnancy Series so the story will be probably different from the original series!

Jumin

The both of you were at a diner when you suddenly got contractions, feeling pain in your whole body.

You couldn’t tell him for sure what was hurting you, but you knew that you would give birth to your baby soon.

When you suddenly felt water run down your legs, you immediately knew that this baby was impatient to meet the world.

You were gasping for air and holding Jumin’s hand when another wave of pain overcame you, making you go down to your knees and hold onto your abdomen stronger.

,,Mr Han, we will bring you to the hospital,’’ Driver Kim said, trying to get you up.

However, you stopped Jumin when he was too tired to move you. ,,The midwife said to wait for the ambulance in case the baby comes in the car…’’ you gasped and looked between him and the driver.

Jumin nodded, reminding that you were right and so all guests were brought outside while pillows were put on the floor so that you could lay down and feel a bit more comfortable.

,,Heeee heee hu….’’ he helped you to breathe, showing you the right rhythm.

Finally, the ambulance came, however, things took a bad turn and he quickly noticed that something wasn’t going the way it should…

,,She is having complications. We need to give birth in C-Section! Quickly!’’ one paramedic said as your eyes flickered. You were so weak by now.

He couldn’t do anything but just watch, but suddenly you found a bit of strength to go against the paramedic.

,,No! No wait,’’ you called, sobbing and trying to hold in Jumin’s jacket.

,,C-Section is so bad for the baby!’’ you said to Jumin.

He looked at you as you sobbed ,,She will die if they don’t do it…’’ Jumin told you and brushed your hair with his hand.

And so, to save your daughter, you clunched your eyes and let them rush you to the hospital, even though natural birth would have been better in your opinion...

Zen

,,The baby is in the wrong position. The legs are down,’’ the doctor told you.

There were just a few weeks to go until you would be due and there wasn’t the possibility that the baby would turn around this late in the pregnancy.

,,What? I don’t want it… I heard so many bad things,’’ you said as your hand laid on your belly, your child was kicking.

You were sad and kind of angry, you wished for a natural birth so much. Maybe one in the water.

But now this all disappeared.

,,The baby could hurt himself. I can’t help you, I’m sorry. And nowadays, the medical care is so good that your baby will be more than fine,’’ the doctor tried to make you feel better.

Zen patted your hand and smiled at you.

His red eyes looked at you as he tried to make you feel better.

,,It’s not that we have another option, MC,’’ he mumbled and kissed your hand.

Suddenly you began to cry. Those days, it happened a lot.

,,I know,’’ you sobbed.

,,That’s why… ah… I wanted to see my baby, to give birth at it, and what if they cut or hurt him?’’ you asked him.

,,I will be by your side and make sure nothing goes wrong, I promise…’’ he lastly told you, making you feel just a bit better.

Yoosung

,,We already did it once. The doctor back then told me that the next time there was a chance that I could give birth to my baby naturally and right now you are-ugh! Telling me no?!’’ you asked the nurse as she told you that you had to get ready for surgery.

,,Yoosung! Are you or aren't you a doc! Say something!’’ you said angrily to your husband.

He looked at you helplessly as he mumbled that he was a vet and that there was nothing he could do.

,,Mrs Kim, the baby's head is too big. It could get very dangerous for your newborn,’’ she told you and looked at you apologetically.

Suddenly you began to hiss. ,,Last time it hurt like hell! Yoosung! You did this again!’’ you hissed angrily while you held his hand.

He nodded and kept kissing your forehead as he apologized.

He knew how much you wished for this birth to be normal and that you wanted to see your child and not have countless people around you cut you and close you up again.

,,I will get you ready now, Mrs. Kim,’’ the nurse smiled and took out a razor to make your abdomen free from the hair for the surgery.

And just like back then, they gave you sedatives as you cried to yourself.

,,I… wanted to stay awake this time,’’ you groaned when you suddenly felt yourself feeling sleepy.

Yoosung could just cry as he saw you in pain.

Once again you both decided to go to a very big hospital and just like the last time, nothing was done the way you wished for it.

Not even Yoosung was allowed to stay as he was sent outside where Jumin and Jaehee, as well as Zen waited for him.

His daughter was sleeping in Jaehee’s arms as Zen approached him, patting him to ask why he was crying.

,,They didn’t do it how we wanted again,’’ he mumbled and looked over to the surgery room.

Jaehee

,,Why C-Section?’’ Jaehee asked the doctor.

You looked from her to the man in the white clothing as he explained why he had to perform the surgery.

,,But what if you accidentally cut my baby? Or what if something goes wrong? I’ve heard so many bad things,’’ you mumbled, looking at Jaehee.

The both of you fought so hard for this baby and to become both mothers.

You did everything right and now the last step would go like this?

Jaehee stroked your hair as she nibbled at her lips.

,,How much time do we still have?’’ Jaehee asked the doctor as she wanted to talk to you.

,,About half an hour,’’ he said, but before going out he looked back at the both of you. ,,Although, there’s not much to decide if you want to give birth to this baby well,’’ he said and with that he left you with your thoughts and fears.

,,Let’s do it, Mc,’’ Jaehee said as soon as he was out.

,,I know that we have to go with it, but I heard so many things and I thought this would be my body…’’ you whined.

Jaehee nodded as she kissed your nose. ,,Soon we will have this wonderful baby in our hands and then we will be able to enjoy our time, but one last time let’s do this, for the baby.’’

Saeyoung

You were pregnant with twins. When Saeyoung found out, he was scared at first.

Scared that he wouldn’t be a good father, that he would turn out like his mother, that his children wouldn’t like him…

The young man struggled with a lot of things, but when one day, you fainted early on in your pregnancy, he knew that he would love these children with his everything and that with you he had nothing to fear.

You would be by his side and support him and since he already loved and worried about his unborn children so much, there was no way that he would turn into a monster.

And maybe that’s why he was so protective of you when you felt the sharp pain and the ambulance had to pick you up, just to tell you that the babies would come way too early.

,,We need to perform a C-Section,’’ the doctor nodded and asked Saeyoung to sign the document.

He was about to sign when you stopped him. Gasping for air, you tried to check if there was another way.

,,Delaying the birth won’t be an option. It could put you or one of the babies at risk. Twins usually come earlier so there is nothing to fear. We will do our best.’’

Even if you still didn’t trust the doctor, you decided to go with it and so you were transported away to a place Saeyoung couldn’t keep you safe on his own anymore…

Saeran

The both of you looked at each other as the doctor told you the news.

You were currently pregnant and in your final trimester.

Everything went well these past 38 weeks.

Your baby was healthy, you were healthy, and you enjoyed every single moment of it.

But right now, the only thing you felt was disappointment as the doctor told you that you probably couldn’t give birth naturally, but needed a C-Section as the baby turned around at the last minute so the feet of your newborn were down and the head upside down.

You pressed your lips together and Saeran could see that your hands were trembling.

You were scared of giving birth, but now that this problem came up, you were also unsure.

But you knew that you didn’t have another possibility other than to agree with him.

,,I don’t like that they will have to use so many medications, I heard that a lot of things can go wrong,’’ you mumbled on your way home.

You were still holding his hand. The both of you walked slower as it was hard for you to keep up with him.

,,I know, I understand,’’ he gasped. He too, to be honest, would have liked to see you giving birth naturally, but on the other hand it would be less painful for you, he thought.

,,Baby, why can’t you turn around?’’ you asked your baby and received a kick.

,,Yeah, thanks!’’ you laughed and held the spot you were just kicked in with your hand.

Saeran supported your back with his hand as he led you home. ,,I know how you feel, but I will do my best to stay by your side even in surgery and the next time, for the next baby, we can have a natural birth, I am sure of it!’’ he smiled, making you feel a bit better.

Jihyun

He rubbed his hands together as he sat on the uncomfortable chairs in the waiting room.

Jumin was next to him as he was leaning back.

He seemed relaxed on the outside, but to be honest, he was also worried.

For Lucy, the little girl he was the godfather of and you, a person who changed his best friend's life for the better. He was grateful to you.

But to know that you actually had an accident didn’t make him feel that good, knowing that you were 39 weeks pregnant, however, made his stomach twist.

,,Mr. Kim,’’ the doctor asked and looked around, mustering the attention of the two handsome men in the waiting room.

,,Yes?’’ Jihyun got up and tried to gulp. His throat was just so dry…

He was scared of the words of the doctor, but he felt at ease as soon as he was told that Lucy was okay.

,,She just has a little stitch in her arm and will probably have a little headache, but please don’t worry. However, your wife,’’ he stopped.

Jihyun felt his legs tremble as the doctor said ,,however’’, what did that mean?

,,We need to give birth to the baby now in a C-Section to prevent it’s death, but she is against it. We need to hurry, so if you would please try to calm her down so that we can begin,’’ he mumbled.

Jumin chuckled a bit. It was a serious matter, but he didn’t expect anything else from you, the woman who would fight everyone with everything she had.

Jihyun nodded and followed the doctor, seeing you with all those scratches and the blood made his heart sink, but he didn’t hesitate to approach you.

,,Hey,’’ he said, a bit sad as he noticed that your hands were trembling.

,,Jihyun,’’ you said. From the sound of your voice, he knew that you were on the verge of crying.

,,It’s too early,’’ you sobbed.

,,They will hurt him. I’ve heard so many bad stories… I don’t want to,’’ you mumbled, finally sobbing now.

,,I understand, Mc. I love you so much and I wish I could make you happy, but they have to or the baby will die if we don’t hurry,’’ he softly explained, trying to make you lay back as his fingers touched your trembling lips, following the shape of your red lips he loved so much.

,,You will be able to see your baby soon and Jumin is outside. Nothing will go wrong and we will keep an eye on it okay?’’ he asked you.

Slowly, you didn’t fight back as the nurse began to do her work, someone else shaving your abdomen.

One last time, you looked over to Jihyun who also seemed very emotional, but still managed to smile at you as you softly closed your eyes.

Now it was his turn to be strong for you...

Vanderwood

This morning was supposed to go differently when you woke up.

You guys actually wanted to have fun together on your couch and watch a movie, eat some food, and talk about the future.

But nothing came like that.

You suddenly felt dizzy in the bathroom and immediately called Vanderwood as you were beginning to panic.

,,I’m here,’’ he gasped and held you. ,,I’m here, Mc, what’s wrong?’’ he asked you again.

Softly, but weakly, you managed to tell him that you felt a slight pain between your legs.

At first he was scared, scared to death when he heard about your pain.

But as he arrived at the hospital with you, he calmed down.

The news that you would give birth soon made him nervous, yes, but he wasn’t scared that something was wrong with the baby or you.

Well, for now at least.

The situation quickly changed after three hours.

,,She’s too weak!’’ the midwife whined to the doctor.

Vanderwood was actually ready. Everyone was but you.

He saw you there, gasping for air, sweating and crying.

His heart was breaking as he saw how much pain you were in.

,,C-Section, we can’t go on like this,’’ the doctor calmly said and nodded to the nurses. Apparently, they all knew what to do.

Suddenly he heard your whimper as you looked to him

,,Please don’t. I will do better, but don’t,’’ you whined, searching for his hand.

Vanderwood didn’t think twice and held your hand as he tried to smile.

,,It will be alright, Mc, I promise. Nothing will happen to you or the baby, okay? Don’t worry, I will stay here,’’ he promised and tried to stroke your head. He tried to swipe the sweat away and noticed how hot you were.

Was this a fever or just from the hard work?

He knew that you wanted to fight back, say something, do something against the decision, but as you were so nervous, they decided to put you to sleep while the surgery was ongoing, making you close your eyes slowly.

,,I’m here,’’ he said and looked down to the medical staff performing the surgery.

MASTERLIST 1

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🤰🏻ᴘʀᴇɢɴᴀɴᴄʏ sᴇʀɪᴇs🤰🏻Masterlist here

27.05.2021// 23:15 MEST

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thomaslightwoodenthusiast · 3 years

Text

hey you guys, here is a little something i’ve been working on! it’s going to be quite long so apologies, but i am going to eventually post it on wattpad too! enjoy!

(this piece revolves around thomastair, but is NOT thomastair only. they are going to be the main theme, but i don’t like writing pieces only on a ship. also it’s gonna be good anyways bc it has drunk and pining charles at one point)

A NOTE: i realised there is a problem. if i wrote the entire thing in a tumblr post, it will be far too long. but it also isn’t long enough for a work. i have decided i will upload in different parts. please let me know if after reading this you are still interested! if not, that’s fine and i’ll probably post it to wattpad lol. but i haven’t written in a while now and i am scared it’s not as good lol. anyways here u go

enjoy!

desc: in which christopher decides that everyone needs a pick me up after recent events, and concludes that the best way to do so is to hold a talent show at the institute. what could possibly happen?

———————————

Alastair scrunched up yet another ball of paper and threw it atop the ever increasing pile beside his desk. He had been trying for days- no, weeks now, to write a letter to Thomas. Despite feeling that he did the right thing in walking away, he could not scratch the feeling that he had hurt him. He wanted at least to apologise, and to let him know he believed it was the best decision for them both.

But was it? Alastair could not lie to himself. He did not feel as good as he thought he would. I’m doing this for his sake, he thought. He is more important to me than I will ever be to myself.

“So, what do you think?”

Alastair looked up. He’d almost forgotten about the ‘Talent Show’ Christopher Lightwood was arranging at the Institute. He was actually considering turning up to prove the point that he was not going to accept Matthew’s ill treatment of him, but he had little energy and currently could not be bothered to waste time on him. He knew that Cordelia was going. She and Lucie had chosen to audition together. They were going to act out a scene from ‘The Beautiful Cordelia’, with Lucie as Cordelia and his sister as one of her many lovers Lucie provided her with.

She was wearing his clothes.

“I think you look utterly mad. In a pleasant way, of course.” It was true. Cordelia looked amazing in his clothes. Not as good as he did, but a close second.

“Thank you, oh cheerful brother of mine. Are you quite alright? There is a rather large pile of paper beside you. Not to mention you look as if your eyes have cried the tears of the earth’s oceans,” she replied. There was the usual sibling tone of mockery in her voice, but also a tone of genuine concern. Alastair looked at himself in the window and realised Cordelia was right; he must have been crying, though he had no recollection of doing so.

“I am fine. Go and have fun. You deserve to, after this gargantuan mess.”

“Alastair, I am not stupid. I know when you are hurting. And what’s that on your desk?” she asked. Before he could stop her, Cordelia had made her way across the room and grabbed the piece of paper sitting in front of him. Alastair had not realised it, but he had written a few of his earlier thoughts on the page.

Cordelia frowned as she read out loud, “‘He is more important to me than I will ever be to myself.’ Alastair, I swear on all of the angels if this is about Ch-“

“It isn’t! It isn’t. I...well I suppose it’s just thoughts. Feelings.”

Cordelia was not having it. “If it’s not about him, who is it about?”

“Well, if you want a clue, his friend is the reason I cannot be at all bothered to attend tonight.”

Cordelia thought, and there was a long pause. She furrowed her brow. She seemed to be remembering something. “It’s not...is it Thomas?”

Alastair closed his eyes, as if the name pained him. “How did you guess?”

Cordelia had to admit; she wasn’t entirely sure. But a few observations she’d made over the past months had made her think. She remembered the time on the bridge when Thomas refused to show his tattoo- until Alastair had asked to see it. The time at Anna’s, when she had asked everyone what names they would want and Thomas had quietly admitted he would want only one, never saying who.

The time she and her brother had been speaking with Charles, only for her to notice Thomas had been staring at them.

“I don’t know. Sisterly instincts, I suppose. Do you want to tell me about it? Actually, no, hold on. I will not give you the option. You bottle up far too much, Alastair. Please, pray tell me, what this is about?”

Alastair sat for a moment, unsure where to start. “You remember the day, don’t you? When I defended Thomas in the Sanctuary? It starts long before that; but I fear if I tell it all you may miss out on your night. I had said that I followed him because you were fond of him. That was...” He trailed off. The words were not leaving his mouth. Cordelia smiled sympathetically. “It was only part of the truth. I came to find that I myself was indeed...quite fond of him. And I was afraid that if he went out alone with a murderer on the loose, something would happen. I couldn’t bear the thought of it being my fault; I have done enough damage. When I saw him being arrested I panicked and did the only rational thing I could think of.”

Cordelia raised her eyebrow. “Follow him the whole way to the Sanctuary risking getting caught by the Inquisitor, then further increase your risk of getting caught by sneaking into the Institute and hiding until you were needed?”

“What can I say?” her brother replied, seeming distant. “You do...odd things, when you care about someone.”

“Alastair, you risked your own safety doing what you did as well. I do not know what on earth I would do if something had happened to you without my knowledge.”

“My dear Layla. When one’s heart is so encompassed with love for another, rationality is quite frankly defenestrated.”

“What exactly does ‘defenestrated’ mean?”

“Thrown out the window,” Alastair replied, matter-of-factly. Cordelia moved towards the door of his room, realising she had to leave soon. “I only want to ask one more question. Is Thomas aware of your feelings for him?”

Alastair laughed to himself. “Quite. In fact, in the Sanctuary, I discovered that being held in confinement with someone who is as handsome as he is kind can result in interesting outcomes.”

Cordelia mocked a gasp. “Alastair Esfandiyār Carstairs, did you spend that whole night-“

“Ah ah! An honourable man does not kiss and tell.”

Cordelia’s eyes widened. “YOU KI-“

“Fine! Quieten down, lest mother is given a heart attack! Look, what happened is staying between us only. But I can tell you this; we did have a long conversation, in which he told me that he liked men. He also told me how he had figured that out; turns out that it was essentially me. I was quite shocked, because I thought he was referring to our school days when he mentioned feelings for me. I was, however, promptly proven wrong, shall we say.”

Cordelia’s face burst into a grin, before she sensed there was something else to the story. “Wait. What happened? What did you tell him?”

“You must understand, Layla, I really do care for him. But his friends- they hate me. Matthew cannot even be in the same room as me without hurling an insult. I cannot be with him; it is too complicated. I do not want to break that poor boy’s heart again, not after the Academy. I told him what I just told you, though I fear my last statement may have been too late. The letter you have in your hand and the paper you see on the floor are all my attempts at an apology. I just...walked away. Left him there. If only I had the chance to apologise to Matthew, this could have been different. But he will not accept it. He will not stop hounding me with comments, and I feel as though I can never stop being fifteen years old. I know I deserve better, but it can be tiring to fight when all your life you’ve been at war with yourself.”

Cordelia made a decision in that moment. She looked at Alastair and observed the similarities in how he and Thomas had been acting. Thomas looked a weight had been lifted off his shoulders, only to have one twice as heavy dropped on again. Alastair seemed even more quiet than usual. “You are coming with me. I don’t care when you turn up, you are turning up. I will ensure there is a piano nearby so that you can demonstrate your own incredible talent. If Matthew makes a jab at you, I will take care of it. If these rules are not met, you will be cut to pieces with Cortana. See you there,” she said, concluding her speech and leaving. Alastair watched as she left the house. He felt inspired by what she had said. He realised something within himself, too.

I cannot run from my past, but I cannot be forced to stay in it either. I am worth more than that.

And I’ll take any opportunity possible to make sure Matthew knows I refuse to take it anymore.

#shadowhunters #the shadowhunter chronicles #chain of iron #lgbtq #queer #cordelia carstairs #alastair and cordelia #alastair carstairs #the last hours #chain of gold #thomas lightwood #christopher lightwood #james herondale #matthew fairchild #will herondale #lucie herondale #thomastair #alastair x thomas

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nctworststuff · 3 years

Text

Pairing- Boyfriend!Renjun x nospecific!reader

Warning-Death,Cancer

Genre: Angst

a/n: Here what you guys got after a months I’m not post anything. Also Thank you my friend,Lucy because helping me a lot :). Hope you guys like it

He always with you

He avoided meeting with you lately. You missed to spend time with him so much. You missed his scent, his hugs, his kisses, his presence, but most importantly, you missed him.

You recently spent a lot of time in your apartment, all by yourself. Watching movies, drinking hot chocolate and staying under your fluffy blanket. Sometimes you went to hangout with your friends, but not as often as you used to. However, today you couldn't take it anymore. I have to visit him, now!

Deep inside you knew that he would never cheat on you. What if something bad had happen to him? Maybe he got sick or maybe something in his family came up? You didn't know. Helplessly you scrolled through your media social. Usually, he would be active on Instagram. Always adding things to his story or at least posting the pictures he made. But ever since 3 weeks ago, you haven't seen him post a single thing. As if he vanished.

You took a look at your photo gallery on your phone. It's filled with pictures of you and Renjun. Everytime the two of you had met in the past months, you had taken at least one picture. Are you okay, renjun?

You didn't want to waste your time anymore, so you walked into your bedroom to change your outfit. You arrived at his house that felt like a second home to you. Big dark clouds covered the sky and sun. It may rain soon. You slowly walked to the door and opened it with the spare key Renjun gave you not so long ago.

You couldn't see him when you entered. Maybe he is in his bedroom? You steped further into his apartment. It was a big mess. You tried to comprehend what could've happened here. The TV was on, adding some noise to the otherwise quiet space. Some old snacks that have neither been fully eaten nor thrown away, covered the floor. It surely wasn't healthy for him to life in all this trash.

You finally went upstairs and pressed the door handle down slowly after knocking and getting no reply. Who knows, maybe he's sleeping? However you suddenly heard a faint crying sound instead of the silence. What's happening to him? Thousands of thoughts were running in your head, creating one scenario worse than the other. "Renjun?" You softly called out his name and fully opened the door. He turned his head and body to look at you, surprised by your arrival. His eyes were more red than white and his face looked as white as freshly fallen snow did.

"Y/n? W-what are you doing here?" He looked at you with what you could only assume was an angered expression. You slowly approached him and sat down on his mattress beside him. You hesitantly leaned your head on his shoulder and put your hand on his thigh, joining his own one. Oh, how often you had fiddled with his slender fingers before. They were just as beautiful as the art they created, but now they were just dried skin and bone. You were convinced, something bad happen to him!

"And why are you crying?", you asked him in return, probably a bit too late, but not that it matered anyways. He kept quiet for about a minute, before taking a deep breath and forcing those awful words out of his mouth. "I have a disease! I-I have cancer..." He closed his eyes tightly to hold himself back from sobbing. The fear that lived within him ever since the doctor told him he was going to die earlier than expected, suddenly skyrocket in your presence.

Shutting you out in the hope of making you forget him, had been so much easier than seeing your heart break right in front of him. You didn't deserve the pain he caused you, so why...? Why are you still here y/n? Why couldn't you stay away from me? "So that's the reason why you pushed me away? The reason you avoided me? Why didn't you tell me? Renjun? Explain it to me. Please explain everything." you looked at his eyes that beared so many emotions, while he bit his chapped lips.

"I-I don't know. I... I was just so, so scared. Actually, I-I knew I had cancer... It... They told me a year ago."

His confession was interrupted by a hiccup. He started crying again and put his hand on his face. You've been together for 3 years and he kept this a secret for all the time, telling you just now? "I-I'm only going to live for one more week. My doctor said there is no other way for me." Why? Why did he need to leave like this? Couldn't he be healthy and grow old with me? Searching in your confused and helpless mind you looked for a solution.

"Hey, i-it's okay. Its not your fault! I-I could spend all my money for your surge-", but he cut you off with a harsh movement by his hand. "You heard what I said. There's no chance, y/n!" Now your eyes were filling with tears, blurring your sight. This can't be true! "You said you would never leave me. You- You promised." The tears poured out of their home, painting a wet line down your cheeks until they dropped down your chin, falling. You too, felt like falling. You were so angry, but not at him, no, he didn't wanted this either. You were angry at the situation. At the fact that you couldn't do Anything.

Watching your little emotional breakdown, Renjun stayed quiet. After he had avoided meeting you for so long, seeing you come back to him, crying with him, still caring for him, there was only one thing he wanted. "Y/n? Can I ask for one last thing, before death is taking me?" He moved his hand to your shoulder, pressing it softly. "Anything for you, Renjun!" You desperately looked into his eyes, meeting his softened expression. "I just want to spend my last week with you. Please. One last time?"

Day 2

Standing in the kitchen for about half an hour, you had made a healthy breakfast for the two of you, since he loved your cooking. You poured some hot porridge into his favourite bowl and placed it on the tray. Walking slowly to not drop anything you brought the food to his bedroom. He was still asleep, looking utterly peaceful.

While you put the tray on a near small table, you called his name softly, to wake him up. Upon hearing his name, his eyelids fluttered open. Still a bit sleepy, he rubbed his eyes and gave you a questioning look. "I made some porridge for you. Should I... feed you?" You smiled at him shyly. He could just nod his head, feeling exhausted even after taking such a long nap.

You sat down beside him and took the spoon to feed him. He followed your every move as you put the still warm porridge in his mouth. A big smile suddenly stretched across his cheeks. "I knew your cooking would never disappoint me!", he complimented, making you giggle. Yet, you couldn't ignore the sad feeling in your chest, knowing you had to accept the fact that he was going to die soon. Only five days would be left after today.

Of course Renjun noticed the way your expression changed. “I dont like to see you sad. Please smile for me” He grabbed your other hand too, making you smile. The smile only he got to see. You don't even know if the sweet smile you were currently wearing on your face would show up for another guy, but for now it seems like it is just for Renjun, who finally noticed the bracelet on your wrist.

"You still wear that bracelet?” His eyes fixated on your wrist. You just watched him with sparkling eyes, while thinking back to how you got that gift. “Of course! It looks so pretty and it bears a lot of memories for me!” He smiled at you with just the same sparkles glowing in his eyes, making your heart beat unbelievable fast in your chest. You didn't knew why, but the comforting feeling of love, the love created between the two of you, filled your now shared room. Softly touching your own cheeks you felt how they heated up.

“It's- wait... I gave you the bracelet 5 years ago, when it was your birthday? A-and we still didn't turn into lovers that day, did we?”, his eyes widened. You simply nodded and started chuckling, him joining not much later. Of course you could still remember the day he gave you the precious bracelet. He was being so shy back then, when he planned to give it to you. Haechan, Mark and all the other dreamies kept hyping him up, after he gave it to you.

“You know what? I really can't believe our relationship will just end soon. I really thought we would last longer. I'm sorry!” He smiled at you again, but this time it was a sad smile. You sighed, closing your eyes in agony. “It's not your fault, it never was, Renjun! After all, these moments are the most precious ones that we have. Trust me, I will love and remember you until I take my last breath!” I'll really do! Besides bringing it up first, you hated talking about his disease so much.

Not because you blamed it on him. Not because you couldn't believe, he was going to die soon, no. You hated talking about it because you feared being left behind. You hated the fact that you'll eventually forget about him. That you'll forget how he smelled, how his hands felt, how his hugs felt. And the worst thing was, that you'll forget how it felt to be loved by him. When did all your laughter turn into cries?

Day 4

"Look! It's your favourite flower!” Renjun points his finger to a small bunch of flowers in the middle of the park. You loved going to this park with him before and today wasn't any different. Softly swining your linked hands back and forth and slowly walking near your favourite flower felt like one of those cliché moments from a drama. Especially when you kneeled down to smell on it.

The heavy, but lively smell of the rose lingered in your nose, bringing up even more memories. Renjun gave you one of those exact roses, when he had confessed that he liked you. A small grin made it's way to your lips. “It looks so pretty.”, Renjun said while putting his arm around your shoulders, “Pretty like you!” You couldn't help, but roll your eyes. This was typically him. Renjun loved to compliment and tease you at the same time

You loved the moments when he was simply being himself. He was acting different. Usually he would be rather harsh, or how people liked to put it, ignorant towards other people’s feelings. But he always cared for you. You were his soft spot. It was only normal that couples had little fights from time to time, but renjun never let the two of you be angry at each other for a long time.

He always was the first one to apologize, or if it wasn’t his mistake, he would still want to make up, inviting you to do something that you liked. His classic line which always worked was weather you would want to eat some food ugh him. It was one of the many personality traits that you liked about him

“Ah! I really want to draw the pond and swan over there! It’s unbelievable pretty!” He excitedly took out his paintings tools and moved the stuff around until it stood perfectly within his reach while drawing. You just followed him and tried to not get in his way.

Tipping the smallest brush into the water glass, he started to draw the perfect scenery in front of you. He truly was talented at this. You couldn’t help but admire the way he let the colors dance on the Canva “Your drawing is so unbelievable. It really does look like it’s real”

His face lit up,once the words left your mouth “This is the last painting I”ll before I’m gone. I want it to be perfect!”he still smiled at you, but his eyes showed how he truly felt. The sadness dominating any other feels. Once again, you sighed. It has been almost 3 years, since you’ve been a couple and now you two just stood there, waiting for him to leave

Quickly noticed How your mood shifted towards a bad one, you tried to change the topic

There will be enough time for me to sad once he left

“Do you remember that this place is the first place we met and-“ “The place where I confessed my feelings for you?” He finished your sentence with a smirk. Chuckling you nodded at the statement

That day he called you and asked you to meet him at the park “ can you cell me?” was that he said, when he actually was going to confess to you. You can’t forget that day. You never will. It’s a very precious moment to you, even if he stuttered a lot and the confession felt really awkward too

“Your birthday is this week, isn’t it?” Renjun suddenly asked. You stopping your thoughts. Right, you totally forgot about your birthday. Surprised you just hummed and nodded. “What do you want for your birthday?” You didn’t need to think twice “I just want you stay alive and healthy. I wish you could always be my side” you smile confidently

That will never happen

It was obvious to renjun, but to avoid you sadder he just smile sweetly at you instead of responding “Can we go somewhere after this? Maybe the shopping mall?” You asked him. He looked at you and hugged you close to his chest “Of course!”

He would spend his time with you wisely and make sure that every precious and special moment will never be forgotten

Day 7

I can't lose him! Please!

You buried your face into his shoulder and grabbed his sweater like your own life depended on holding it. You couldn't believe he was going to die in less than a day. He couldn't... Your fragile, pathetic hope only faded more when he started coughing. In the last few days his condition extremely worsened and you tried to understand why people needed to suffer before dying so much. Isn't death enough?

“It's your birthday tomorrow, isn't it?”, he quietly asked while stroking your back. “Yes” Your answer was barely loud enough to hear, being muffled by his neck. Still, you hugged him only tighter, afraid of finally losing him. “Y/n, I'm so sorry if I'm not able to be with you tomorrow to celebrate your birthday.” You knew what’s he meant. No, this couldn't be happening! Why were you suddenly to dumb to accept it?

“Please find a better guy than me. A guy who will make you happy, who will stay loyal to you and only loves you. Find a guy who will stay by your side forever. Don't find another guy who'll make you feel dissapointed.” You wanted to tell him, that he never disappointed you, but he already pulled you into a sweet kiss. His lips felt so soft. Soft but rough. It was like your first kiss with him. It was like your first night with him. But in reality, it was your last kiss with him. Yet you saw it as another moment that had been created in this special time.

“You know... I am never going to stop loving you!” You said and looked at him. His face was so pale, you could see the soft blue shining through it. “Me too, honey. There are 7 billion people on this earth but I fell in love with you. We have been a long journey together. Everyone can fall in love but not everyone has a happy ending with it. I'm sorry that I couldn't keep my promise, Y/n!” I know, Renjun.

The worst part for you was that it all happened so fast. But somehow you still hoped this was only a dream. That you would wake up to a healthy Renjun wishing you a happy birthday. Finally the clock was showing 12 AM. It was your birthday. Sounding just as sleepy as you felt he whispered a soft “Happy birthday, Y/n!” He stroked your hair while looking at you with loving eyes, a smile on his lips for the last time, before you both fall asleep under your shared blanket.

Not knowing, that they were his last words.

Day 8

You woke up from a deep slumber and moved your blanket. You saw that Renjun was still ‘sleeping’. Softly you shaked him to wake him up, with no sign of success. He didn't response in any way. After a few more times of you trying to wake him up and him still not moving an inch, you tried to recall which date it was today.

No, it can't be.

Yesterday was the last day you would spend with him. One week. Seven days. All moved by faster than you could remember. In your final hope you searched for his heartbeat, but you didn't hear anything. You couldn't. Now you would need to accept the fact that he was gone. Forever.

You start sobbing. "Renjun, please wake up. Please!" Despite your wobbly arms, you shook his body, screaming so uncontrollably loud that it even hurt your ears. It's my birthday. Today is supposed to be a happy day. This has to be a nightmare. I'll always be by your side. Resonating in your mind you hear a faint voice, but you just ignore it. Renjun was right. Not everyone has a happy ending. And you were certainly one of them.

I'm sorry for breaking our promise

©ɴᴄᴛᴡᴏʀsᴛsᴛᴜғғ@/ᴛᴜᴍʙʟʀ

#nct 127 #nct dream #nct #nct u #nct 2021 #nct imagines #nct angst #nct scenarios #renjun #nct drabbles #renjun drabbles #renjun angst #kpop #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #renjun x reader #nct x reader #nctzen #nct 2020

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eliotquillon · 3 years

Text

HIVE TIMELINE TWO, ELECTRIC BOOGALOO (Updated and reworked for Bloodline; spoilers ahead!)

It's a year since my original HIVE timeline (which you can read here and is obviously pre-Bloodline), and how things have changed. Well...kind of. I was expecting more of my timeline to crumple under the weight of eight years' worth of continuity errors but, unlike most of my pre-Bloodline fic, my 2020 timeline has stayed somewhat intact. However, in light of Nessa's excellent post that used the Bloodline prologue to figure out Raven's birthday with a scary amount of accuracy, I've decided that somewhat intact just isn't enough. Lo and behold...find the C ottomalpense new and improved H.I.V.E. timeline under the cut. This is just my interpretation of the canon timeline; because Walden contradicts himself constantly when it comes to age and continuity, most of these dates are educated guesses and any other interpretations are more than valid. Bloodline spoilers below.

PART ONE: RAVEN

In my original timeline, I used two anchor dates: Otto's 13th birthday being August 29th 1993, and Raven being 16 in the 'fifteen years earlier' Hong Kong flashback, making her 31 in Aftershock/Deadlock. Using the age difference between her and Otto, I counted backwards to give Raven a birth year of 1979. Otto's birthday still holds up, but Bloodline has since made it clear that Raven was 15 in Hong Kong. Therefore, several options presented themselves in order to salvage the rest of the timeline.

Option 1: Raven was indeed born in 1979, and Hong Kong takes place in 1994. This would make her 27 in H.I.V.E., given that she has a September birthday and H.I.V.E. takes place between September-December 2006. However, this means Raven that if Raven is 30 in Aftershock/Deadlock, there are only three years between the first seven books....something that canon vaguely supports given Shelby's "I've waited three years for you two to get together" comment to Laura and Otto in Deadlock, but feels very, very unrealistic given the number of time skips and the sheer volume of things that happen in the first seven books. My original timeline was created to get rid of the stasis in canon and give a better sense of the progression of time between books. Keeping Raven's birth year as 1979 undermines that.

Option 2: Raven was born in 1981, Hong Kong takes place in 1996, and she is 25 in H.I.V.E., meaning that there's exactly five years between H.I.V.E and Aftershock. This supports my earlier placement of Aftershock being the start of fifth year, but 25 feels kind of...young? It also hinges on Raven knowing her exact birth date before she finds out that Nero is her father, which I personally don't think Bloodline supports - Nero didn't know her birthday, and I think if Raven did know, she would've told him pre-Bloodline.

Option 3: Raven was born in 1980, Hong Kong takes place in 1995, and she is 26 in H.I.V.E., but, because she doesn't know her birth date, she celebrates her birthday on New Year's Eve. So while Raven would technically be 31 in Aftershock, she would still consider herself 30 until the end of the year, as would Nero. This gives a little bit more leeway with her age, reduces the number of changes in the overall timeline, and accounts for the overall unreliability of both Raven and Nero's narration in the flashback scenes - given that one of them had been traumatised so thoroughly that she had recurring psychotic episodes just months before that scene, and the other had his memory tampered with to the point where he misremembered the date of worst day of his life.

I personally opted for Option 3, making Raven's new birthday 3rd-6th September 1980. She is 33 in the Bloodline epilogue. Therefore Hong Kong still takes place in 1995.

PART TWO: OTTO

This is just a rehash of my last timeline, but for clarity's sake: Otto being an August 1993 birthday makes him one of the youngest in his year, meaning that everyone else (Lucy, Wing*, Nigel, Franz, Shelby, Laura, and Penny) were all 1992/3 babies. Bloodline takes place right at the end of his final year (meaning I correctly predicted that it would be set in 2012), making him 19. Something I forgot to mention in my original timeline is that Tom is described as being a few years older than Penny in H.I.V.E., but given that Tom isn't really alive for long enough to present me with an issue timeline wise, I'm just going to let that one slide. The Bloodline epilogue thus takes place in 2013.

As always, I am ignoring Rogue's claim that Otto is 13, because it doesn't make sense in any context (if Otto really is 13, it means he magically ages three years in Zero Hour and Aftershock according to Walden's own implication that Otto is 16 by Aftershock...which I'm also ignoring, but whatever). Laura still choosing between universities in September 2013 is weird, because either she is very, very late for the 2013 academic year, or very, very early for the 2014 one, but, again, I am ignoring it. Essentially, nothing meaningful has changed for any of the student ages between this timeline and the 2020 one.

PART THREE - NERO

This is where it gets interesting. This time last year, my Nero section was just speculation. I was, uh, very off, and did not account for how early Nero knocked Elena up. That was on me. My bad!

Nero is in his early 20s when Elena is murdered. If we take the year to be 1980, and early 20s to mean anything between 20-24, we can get an approximate birth year of 1956-1960. I'm going to average that to 22, making Nero's birth year 1958. He's a practically spritely 48 in H.I.V.E, and 55 in the Bloodline epilogue.

(Also, I am treating the 'thirty years' in the 'thirty years ago' flashback to be an estimate. Nero has memory issues and also thirty years has a much better ring to it than thirty-two.)

PART FOUR - DIABOLUS

We can't talk about Nero without mentioning Diabolus because I, for one, have been haunted by the knowledge that Nero taught Diabolus for years. However, assuming Nero immediately joins the H.I.V.E. teaching staff in 1980 following Elena's death, he is 22. If Diabolus is a first year student, we can give him a birth year of 1966/7. That said, I tend to think Diabolus is a little bit older than that, given how close he and Nero are in Hong Kong, so if we age him up to a third year in Nero's first year of teaching, that makes him 15/16 with a birth year of 1964/5. There's only 6/7 years between him and Nero, leaving plenty of time for them to become close friends by Hong Kong, during which Nero is 37 and Diabolus is approaching 30. That means Diabolus had Nigel at 27/28.

PART FIVE - THE OVERLORD INCIDENT AND XIU MEI

The Overlord Incident (henceforth the OI) is the bane of my existence. There's no mention of Raven in the original flashback in the Overlord Protocol, implying that she wasn't around yet, but it's referenced as still being a work in progress in Hong Kong. Again, this is a rehash of my previous timeline, but the Deadlock interpretation doesn't work; regardless of anything else, Wing was definitely born in 1992/3 in order to be in the same year as Otto, and either Wing or Raven would be too young for the OI to occur after Hong Kong (Raven was only 13 in 1993 in this interpretation of events, and this is one that puts her on the older side - there's an argument to be made for her being born in 1983, which would make her 10). Ergo, in this timeline, the OI precedes Hong Kong.

As mentioned, Wing had to have been born in 1993 at the latest, and the evidence suggests that he's most likely one of the older kids in their year, pointing to a 1992 birthday, meaning Xiu Mei got pregnant by January 1992 at the earliest. There must be time allowed for the following to occur between Wing and Otto's births and the OI: survivors of the OI to start going missing, Xiu Mei and Wu Zhang /Cypher to marry and move to Japan in order to escape persecution, and Overlord to get enough soft power over Number One to convince him to start trying to produce a clone of himself to be his successor. At earliest this can be 1991. I, however, think that it's more likely to be January 1990, given Overlord's comments about how much Number One initially resisted having his brain hijacked. This is the same as my previous timeline.

Unlike my previous timeline, however, I'm also going to attempt to estimate the year of Xiu Mei's death. While the Overlord Protocol does not explicitly state this, it can be inferred that Nero receives Xiu Mei's locket and letter after she is murdered by Overlord for investigating the Renaissance project. Nero receives the locket "many years" before Overlord Protocol (which takes place roughly in Spring/Summer of 2007), but Xiu Mei was also presumed "long dead" already when he received it as a result of the OI. This puts 17 years between Xiu Mei's faked death and Nero's reminiscence over the locket and letter in 2007 after the assassination attempt in Vienna. Xiu Mei can't have died before Wing was at least 5 years old, given the strong memories he has of her and the fact that he made a promise to her not to kill anyone, so I'm tentatively putting Xiu Mei's real death at 2001, when Wing would've been 9. This leaves just enough time for Cypher to establish himself as a thorn in Nero's side, and for his relationship with Wing the deteriorate to what we see in the Overlord Protocol.

PART SIX - OTHER

I've been meaning to do the maths on this for a while, but H.I.V.E.mind was officially brought online April 10th, 2006! (He'd been online for four months, three weeks, and two days by September 1st.) Nero really was paranoid after the OI.

Brexit doesn't occur in the H.I.V.E.verse, because Duncan Cavendish (David Cameron) resigns in 2010, AKA way, way, before the rise of UKIP and the 2016 referendum. The Iraq war, however, does - Tony Blair is heavily, heavily implied to be the prime minister in 2006.

Not really timeline related, but the fact that both Otto and Raven are Virgos is enough to make me shudder.

TL;DR - THE (FINAL???) TIMELINE

1950-59: The Furan siblings are born at some point. Two siblings are twins, presumably Elena and Anastasia or Anastasia and Pietor. At some point, they are owed a blood debt by the Sinistres.

1958: Nero is born.

Early 1960s: H.I.V.E. is founded, most likely by Nero's mother.

1964-5: Diabolus Darkdoom is born.

Late 1970s: Elena and Nero start their affair.

1980: Elena is murdered by Pietor. Raven is born. Nero has his memory of Raven's survival forcibly erased by Francesca Sinistre, clearing the blood debt between the Furan and Sinistre families.

1980s: Diabolus Darkdoom and Duncan Cavendish attend and graduate H.I.V.E. Diabolus and Nero become friends.

1989: Raven runs away from her orphanage.

1990: The Overlord Incident takes place, leaving three named survivors: Nero, Xiu Mei, and Wu Zhang. Overlord begins to assert control over Number One.

1991: Raven is found by the Furans and brought to the Glasshouse. Wu Zhang and Xiu Mei marry and immigrate to Japan after survivors of the Overlord Incident start going missing.

1992: Presumably the year Raven claws out Pietor's eye and gets shot in the woods, it is also the point at which Overlord/Number One most likely starts considering cloning himself. In the final quarter of the year, some students - most likely Wing, Shelby, and possibly Laura - are born.

1993: Otto and the rest of the students in his year are born.

1994: Likely the year Dimitri's escape attempt fails, and Raven is forced to murder Tolya. Also presumably when H.I.V.E.'s Icelandic location became dangerously compromised, and Nero starts seriously considering plans to move. At this point his mother is dead.

1995: Nero and Diabolus go to Hong Kong to meet with the Architect, and thwart Raven's assassination attempt. Raven eventually defects to G.L.O.V.E., and the first Glasshouse burns.

1996-2000: Construction on H.I.V.E. 2.0 is completed. Nero starts work on the emergency Zero Hour protocol.

2001: Xiu Mei is murdered by Overlord for asking too many questions about the Renaissance initiative. Wu Zhang becomes Cypher. Nero receives his half of the amulet, and Xiu Mei's letter.

2001-2005: Lucy's parents die of unknown causes. Diabolus Darkdoom falsifies his death to escape execution for getting too close to the Renaissance initiative, possibly after divorcing his wife first. Otto drops out of school and starts scamming local business to repair St Sebastian's. At some point Pike convinces Nero to try AI again. Number One's will is entirely consumed by Overlord.

2006: H.I.V.E.mind goes online. Pike's experiment to give Ms Leon the same reflexes as her cat goes horribly wrong, leaving them both trapped in the wrong body. Shelby becomes the Wraith and makes headlines for stealing millions of dollars' worth of jewellery. Laura is caught hacking the nearby American air base's early nuclear warning system. Otto hypnotises the current prime minister, allowing Duncan Cavendish to come into power. During a failed escape attempt from H.I.V.E., several hundred million pounds' worth of damage is caused to H.I.V.E. by Nigel's experimental crossbreed plant, Violet.

2007: Cypher fakes his death as Mao Fanchu in order to lure Wing to Tokyo, and the Contessa betrays Nero. Nero keeps Cypher alive, unbeknownst to Number One, and starts to have suspicions about Number One/Overlord for the first time. By the end of August, everyone is fourteen, and first year is over.

2008: H.O.P.E. is formed, and Nero is captured in either April or May whilst meeting with Gregori Leonov. Three months later, he is rescued by Otto, Raven, and the gang. The Contessa and Number One/Overlord die. Laura and Otto kiss, but nothing comes of it. Diabolus resurfaces from the dead to be elected head of G.L.O.V.E.'s ruling council. At some point in late August to early September, Otto, Wing, Shelby and Laura first encounter the animus fluid on a train to Paris whilst on a mission to recover a stolen thermoptic camouflage suit. As a result of the Contessa's death, Lucy Dexter is transferred to H.I.V.E. at the start of third year, at which point everyone is fifteen. Following the hijacking of Dreadnought, and an encounter with Pietor Furan, the animus fluid, and the Disciples, Otto is captured by American forces after saving Air Force One and the US president. He is then turned over to H.O.P.E.

2009: Assassinations of key members of G.L.O.V.E.'s ruling council take place at the hands of Otto, now under the influence of animus. Raven is given executive privilege to kill him if necessary. Otto confesses his love to Laura. Following a confrontation in the Amazon jungle, Cypher, Ghost, and Trent all die. H.O.P.E. is destroyed. Otto feigns memory loss of everything that occurred under animus. By the end of the year, everyone is sixteen.

2010: Laura's brother, Douglas, is born. Otto has continual and repeated nightmares and is the subject of rumours. Overlord takes control of the Advanced Weapons' Testing Facility in Colorado. The Zero Hour protocol is activated. Wing and Shelby get together. Chief Lewis and Lucy Dexter die. Pietor Furan is killed by Raven. Nero becomes head of G.L.O.V.E. Duncan Cavendish is forced to resign. The Architect is contacted by Anastasia Furan through a proxy, and construction of the new Glasshouse is completed. Following the appointment of Security Chief Dekker, Laura is blackmailed into betraying the location of the Hunt after Tom and Penny's recruitment to H.I.V.E. Joseph Wright and several former members of the ruling council are offered the help of Disciples'. All of the Alpha stream save Shelby, Otto, Franz, and Wing are taken captive. Otto is expelled, and joined Raven on the hunt for the location of the new Glasshouse. By the end of the year, everyone is seventeen.

2011: Raven and Otto take down several Disciples, most notably visiting Dubai, London, and Paris. In Venice, they are pursued by the CIA after tracking down the Architect with the help of Diabolus Darkdoom. Tom dies. The new Glasshouse is stormed and destroyed, again. Laura is given the choice as to whether she wants to stay at H.I.V.E. or not, and decides to stay. Anastasia Furan is taken hostage in Nero's basement storage facility. The Disciples' countdown for the new batch of hostages starts at 99 days. By the end of the school year, everyone is eighteen.

2012: The majority of Otto and the gang's final year goes smoothly. Franz starts working out and loses weight, becoming conventionally attractive. A few days shy of graduation, the clone known as Anna becomes loose. Otto reconvenes with the CIA and is allowed access to the last remaining batch of the animus fluid. Francesca Sinistre dies. It is revealed to Nero by Anastasia that he is Raven's father. Raven kills Anastasia. Otto stays behind to destroy H.I.V.E. and dies. His consciousness is transferred to a cloning vat by H.I.V.E.mind. Everyone is nineteen.

2013: Construction on the new H.I.V.E. facility is already underway. Raven finds out her birthday. Shelby and Wing set up an orphanage, implied to be in Africa, for war orphans in Otto's honour. Franz is an instructor at the temporary facility. Laura gets in to MIT and Oxford. In early September, Otto shows up on her doorstep.

#h.i.v.e #h.i.v.e.#h.i.v.e. timeline #bloodline spoilers

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cassandraclare · 4 years

Text

The Anniversary Party

Someone asked me about the flash fiction this month, and I realized I’d sent it out in my newsletter, but forgotten to post it! So here’s the whole Jan/Feb story, in which we get a bit of background on Cordelia and her family. Art by Cassandra Jean, of course! This is the last of the flash fiction stories, and it’s been a pleasure to share them with you!

THE ANNIVERSARY PARTY

FRANCE, 1899....

Cordelia did not like Menton very much. She should have, in theory. Menton was a pretty seaside town, a jumble of pink and yellow buildings along a small harbor, mostly slips for sailboats and some fishing boats. The air was warm and Mediterranean, the fish was exceptionally fresh, she could see Italy from her bedroom window across the far side of the harbor. What was there not to like?

They had come for her father’s health—why else did they go anywhere, after all—and Cordelia could understand why Menton had a reputation as a healing destination for the sick and the elderly. Indeed, her father’s health had rebounded since their arrival a few weeks earlier and he was in a period of good spirits, willing to dance with her in the parlor and even managing to drag a smile out of Alastair on occasion. Alastair had entered a turbulent adolescence, as Cordelia overheard her mother say to her father. Cordelia hoped that when she was Alastair’s age she would maintain her composure a little better than he was managing.

But Menton’s charms quickly faded for her. Its popularity with the sick and the elderly meant that the town’s population had a large proportion of both, and while Cordelia wished them all well, they did not offer her much in the way of companions or even adults interested in conversation with a girl for whom French was her third language, and not very strong. The beach turned out to be made not of sand but of large round pebbles—Cordelia had never heard of such a thing, a beach made of rocks, very uncomfortable on bare feet, not pleasant to lie on, and offering no opportunity for building castles or digging trenches.

Worst of all, her parents continued to be as antisocial as ever, making no efforts to reach out to the local Shadowhunter community (the closest Institute being in Marseilles). And so Cordelia was alone. Sometimes she was alone with Alastair, but he mostly ignored her, and even so they were both duly sick of each other’s sole company after a week.

The only source of relief was the knowledge that this, too, would pass—the Carstairs family moved constantly, obsessively, for the sake of her father’s health. Cordelia could never understand the logic of it, except that she agreed that it was worth doing anything if it meant her father’s wellbeing. In this case, it was a bit of a relief. She knew they would not stay in Menton more than a few months.

This was, she felt, why she was so alone. Her family never stayed anywhere long enough for her to meet anyone her age, much less make friends. Her only real friends in the world were Lucie and James Herondale, and only because, Cordelia knew, Will and Tessa Herondale had always worked very hard to make sure that their children saw the younger Carstairs. It was still a rare treat to see them, as the Herondales ran the London Institute, and thus were usually in London, and occasionally in Idris, while Cordelia and her family were all over the map.

And here again, the Herondales came to her rescue, this time in the form of a letter her father read aloud at the breakfast table.

“’Good morning, Elias and Sona,’ – I say, how would he know what time of day we’d read it, the man is mad as a hatter—”

“We are reading it in the morning, though,” Cordelia said. Her father gave her an indulgent smile and went on.

“’It is a capital day here in London, and I hope it will be a capital day in Paris six weeks hence, when Tessa and I will celebrate our nineteenth wedding anniversary. As it is not the custom of any known culture to make a to-do out of the nineteenth wedding anniversary, we have decided to throw an enormous party.’”

“A ball!” cried Cordelia, but a worry poked at her. Would her parents attend such a thing? Her father was frowning at the letter, but possibly he was simply trying to make the words out better without his glasses.

“It’s not a ball,” said Alastair, who had stopped halfway down the stairway to listen.

“’A ball, if you will,’” her father read on. “Well done, Cordelia.”

Cordelia stuck out her tongue at Alastair.

“’We would love if you and your darling children would join us…if you would do us the pleasure of responding…,’ et cetera, et cetera…” Her father scanned the letter. “And then it has the date and the address and all that.”

“It started out strong, but it ended in something of an anticlimax,” Alastair said.

“Can we go?” Cordelia said eagerly. “Can we please? I would so like to see Lucie and James. And maybe I’d meet some of the people Lucie talks about in her letters!”

“I would like to see anyone at all other than you lot,” said Alastair mildly. “No offense intended.”

“Alastair!” Sona scolded, but Cordelia was not about to let Alastair distract from the main point. She redoubled her efforts in the direction of her father.

“Papa, can we go, please? You’ve recovered so well, surely a trip of only a few days would be possible. Don’t you want Shadowhunter society to see how well you are?”

“Hm,” her father said. He looked at her mother, who looked back. They exchanged a series of incomprehensible looks with one another.

“If you think it would be a good idea,” Sona said to Elias. Cordelia’s father gave Cordelia a long look. Cordelia tried to catch Alastair’s eye, but he’d turned away and was looking with disgust into the middle distance, a typical expression for him these days.

“I think we could manage a train trip and a few days in Paris,” her father allowed. “I do adore Paris.”

Cordelia threw her arms around him. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

Cordelia spent the next weeks in a state of constant dread. She didn’t dare remind her parents of the upcoming trip, lest they remember that they had intended to cancel and not attend after all. It had happened before, but never before for an event in which Cordelia had a strong investment.

But when the event was a few days away, her father brought up the timetable of the Calais-Méditerrannée Express train at breakfast. Tickets were bought, bags packed, and still Cordelia could barely believe it when she found herself the evening before the party, pulling into the Gare du Nord in an elegant blue train car, clutching her hands in her lap in anticipation: Paris, at last she was in Paris! She would see her future parabatai, and her brother, and the cream of Shadowhunter society, and she would do so in Paris.

The next day found her gazing into the full-length mirror in their rooms at the Hôtel Continental on the Rue de Rivoli and wondering that she was even the same girl who had been miserably pining away a few days before. Her mother had helped her select her dress, a frothy lemon confection of lace and silk. She wasn’t entirely sure it suited her, but it was very elegant.

Even Alastair regarded her with something in the neighborhood of admiration when he came in to fetch his gloves. “You look surprisingly mature,” he told her. Cordelia thought that was probably equivalent to a full swoon, for Alastair. For his part, he was clearly aiming at “mature” as well, having put on a brown sack coat with only one of its buttons buttoned, and having dared to apply a dab of pomade to his black hair, which, Cordelia had to admit, did make it shine compellingly.

“You look like you’ll be trying to impress someone at the party,” Cordelia teased him. “Anyone in particular?”

“Everyone,” Alastair sniffed. “Everyone that is anyone.”

Cordelia rolled her eyes.

Her father was in high spirits as they entered the carriage a short time later, joking and laughing. Her mother was quiet, watching her husband with a smile and a considering expression, and that is how they were for the entire ride to the Paris Institute.

She had been practicing her French, and when the imposing figure of Madame Bellefleur greeted them at the Institute door with a paragraph of rapid-fire enthusiasm and questions, she understood them: welcome, how was their journey, isn’t it frightfully chilly tonight. She began to think of a reply, and found that her entire speaking ability in the French language had departed her brain in exactly that moment.

Her father’s French was fluid and expert, and Cordelia felt a little rush of pride as he said, “Madame Bellefleur, dear! You are looking as lovely as ever, Odile. But what has become of you, that you’ve fallen so far to be working the door?”

Madame Bellefleur laughed, a hearty chuckle that made Cordelia like her immediately. “I sent the maid off to enjoy herself. I like answering the door, Elias — it may be the Herondales’ party, but it’s my Institute.”

Inside, Cordelia slipped away from her parents as soon as it was feasible and went to look for her friends. It took her all of five minutes to become hopelessly lost. Unlike any Institute she had been in before, this one was laid out as a labyrinthine series of interconnected salons. Each looked much like the last, and was crowded with adults, none of whom Cordelia knew, and most of whom were speaking in rapid French. She had not spotted a single Herondale, and the clatter and chatter of the party guests was beginning to make her feel less like a young sophisticate at the ball and more like a little girl who had lost her mother at the market.

Out of nowhere came a whirlwind of petticoats, which turned out happily to be Lucie Herondale, throwing herself into Cordelia’s arms with great force and a squeal of delight. “Cordelia, Cordelia, you must come, Christopher is going to teach us how to eat fire!”

“I’m sorry?” Cordelia said politely, but Lucie was already pulling her toward the door to the next salon. “Who is Christopher?”

“Christopher Lightwood, of course. My cousin. He saw a man eating fire in Covent Garden and he said he’d worked out how to do it. He’s very scientific, Christopher.” Lucie’s progress was stopped short, and Cordelia looked up to see a tall, slender older girl, with dark hair braided atop her head and a striking look. She was wearing a lacy blue dress without much enthusiasm. She raised her eyebrows and stared Lucie down. “And this is his sister Anna,” Lucie said, as though she’d planned the encounter.

“Christopher will not be eating any fire,” said Anna, “or indeed anything other than the canapes tonight.”

Lucie said, “Anna, this is Cordelia Carstairs; she’s going to be my parabatai.” Cordelia felt a rush of affection for her friend—she felt so alone so much of the time, but she wasn’t, not really. She was going to have a parabatai; neither she nor Lucie would ever fully be alone again. Or that’s how she had come to understand it would feel.

Anna, however, merely arched an eyebrow. “Not if Christopher burns the Institute down, she won’t.” She turned her piercing gaze onto Cordelia. “Carstairs?” she said curiously. “What Carstairs?”

Cordelia knew what that was about. She gave Anna a smile. “Jem Carstairs is my second cousin. I only know him a very little bit, unfortunately.” Jem, who had been Lucie’s father’s parabatai, had a long and tragic story that ended with his having become a Silent Brother. He was Brother Zachariah now.

Would he be here? It was strange to imagine among the sparkling, laughing conversation, the clinking of glasses, a parchment-robed silent figure drifting about. But why wouldn’t he be? Lucie spoke of him all the time. Cordelia felt a little frisson of nerve at the thought of meeting him again—eagerness but also worry.

“Any Carstairs is welcome,” Anna smiled back airily. “And obviously any parabatai of Lucie’s is essentially a member of the family. Speaking of which.” She turned back to Lucie. “Don’t encourage Christopher, Lucie. You know how he is.”

“It wasn’t my idea!” Lucie protested. “It’s Matthew who set him on it. You know how he is.”

“I don’t,” said Cordelia mildly.

Lucie gave her a look of wide-eyed horror. “Oh, dear, what kind of host am I? Here is my best friend in the world, and I haven’t even introduced you to everyone! Anna, we must go.” She reached for Cordelia’s hand again.

“It was lovely to meet you,” Cordelia said to Anna.

Anna tipped her glass in Cordelia’s direction with a small smile. “Likewise.”

“All right,” Lucie narrated as she pulled Cordelia into yet another salon. “Matthew is Matthew Fairchild, he’s the consul’s son but don’t worry, he’s all right and not a bit stuck-up about it, and anyway Aunt Charlotte and Uncle Henry ran the London Institute when my Papa was young—he lived there, you know—and they’re over there, actually, hullo Aunt Charlotte!” Lucie waved a hand madly.

Cordelia looked over and quickly spotted Charlotte Fairchild—even someone as socially deprived as she was recognized the Consul—who was in the middle of saying something very serious to a group of equally serious-looking people, and didn’t notice Lucie’s wave. It was funny; Charlotte was tiny, bird-like, and towered over by the men around her, but she had a presence that dominated the room regardless. It was an admirable way to be, Cordelia thought.

Next to Charlotte was a red-headed man in a Bath chair, who did see Lucie wave, and waved back madly himself with a grin. Henry Fairchild. He was too far away for them to speak, but Lucie pointed at Cordelia and raised her eyebrows. Henry raised his hands and exclaimed in pleasure, and Cordelia waved too, a little less madly than the others.

“Is that Matthew with them?” Cordelia said. “The tallish one with his father’s hair?”

Lucie snorted. “Oh no! Matthew would be so offended. That’s his older brother Charles. He’s, well….”

“What?” said Cordelia.

“He’s a little dull.” Lucie had the good manners to look ashamed at her admission. “He’s very interested in politics and Shadowhunter business and all that, and he treats us all like children.”

“We are children.”

“Yes, so is he!” Lucie said impatiently. “But you wouldn’t know it from the way he acts.” She sighed. “He’s an all right sort, though. Next salon!”

With rapid speed Lucie took her through the remainder of the people Lucie considered it important for Cordelia to know. Her Aunt Cecily and her Uncle Gabriel—Gabriel also turned out to be among the group surrounding Charlotte—who were Anna and Christopher’s parents. Her Aunt Sophie, who had worked at the Institute as a mundane and then Ascended and married Gabriel’s brother Gideon.

Gideon, Lucie explained, was not here, because Thomas—oh, it was a shame that Cordelia was not going to meet Thomas, and also Thomas would never have allowed Christopher to get within a mile of fire to eat it, if he had anything to say about it, but anyway Thomas had broken his leg and Gideon had stayed home with him.

“Also there are the older girls,” Lucie said darkly. “Barbara and Eugenia. But they’re not much like us. They’re not even here; they had something else tonight. Can you believe it?”

Cordelia wasn’t sure whether she was supposed to believe it or not believe it, having never met either girl, so she only shook her head understandingly.

“Lucie!” A woman with heaps of curly scarlet hair was advancing on them at speed. “I need someone to help me put out the silver. Congratulations, girl, you’re hired.”

“Bridget,” Lucie protested. “Bridget was my nursemaid, when I was young enough to have a nursemaid,” she explained to Cordelia.

“And now your repayment of my kindness to you continues,” Bridget said sharply, “with the putting out of the silver. Come along.”

“I can help,” offered Cordelia.

Bridget looked offended. “I’ll not have a guest doing work at a party. This one here is hosting the thing.” She dragged off Lucie, who gave Cordelia a beseeching look of apology as she vanished into the crowd.

This left Cordelia back to meandering a bit aimlessly. Perhaps, she thought, she would go back and speak more with Anna, who had been so kind. Perhaps she would seek out her own family and see how they were making out.

Where were her family, though? After a few minutes’ wandering she spotted her mother, who seemed to be unusually in her element, animatedly telling some story to a captivated audience. But she couldn’t find her father, or Alastair, anywhere. It was a large party, surely, but she would have expected her father to be with her mother, or if not, captivating his own audience. Cordelia had been able to tell that he was the second-most excited to go to the party after herself. So where was he?

Perhaps, she thought, he had slipped away to the library. She wanted to get a look at the Institute’s library herself, anyway. She managed enough French to ask directions from one of the waitstaff. It was down an iron spiral staircase, and Cordelia allowed herself to feel like a princess descending a tower.

The library had a tremendously high ceiling, which gave it an airy feel, but on the ground it was crowded with ancient, heavy oaken bookshelves, all of which were piled so densely with books that they were bent over by the weight, and it was astonishing that they had not already collapsed. Cordelia loved the place immediately. It was crumbling, in the most beautiful way possible. The light was warm and orange, and dust motes floated in it. It smelled pleasantly of must and old paper, and here and there were chairs of cracked, heavily aged and stained red leather.

Down at the other end of the room there was indeed a figure seated on the windowsill, curled up with a book, but it was obviously not her father. As she got closer, the dark-haired figure raised its head to peer at her, and she realized: it was James Herondale.

Part 2

“Hello,” said James Herondale. He peered up at Cordelia owlishly, as though he’d just come out of a reverie and wasn’t quite returned to the fully waking world.

“By the Angel, I’m awfully sorry.” Cordelia couldn’t help feeling she had interrupted something. She had met James before, of course—Will Herondale had been nothing if not diligent about making sure that his children and the Carstairs children knew one another—but she would not have described him as a friend, necessarily. He was a bit unknowable, in his odd way.

“No need to apologize,” James said mildly, “it’s me who’s skiving off this party to read.” He sat up rather suddenly, as if he’d only just realized he had been splayed casually across the windowsill and he should seek some kind of propriety.

“Most people don’t skive off parties,” Cordelia said, amused. “It’s usually lessons and chores, that sort of thing. Do you not like parties?”

“I like parties just fine,” James said, a bit defensively.

Cordelia crossed her arms and said sternly, “Well, I am in the library because I wanted to see the Paris Institute library, but also because almost the whole party are strangers to me. But they’re your friends, aren’t they? Wouldn’t you want to be with your friends? Matthew, and Thomas and the rest?”

James gave Cordelia a long look. When he spoke, his voice was quiet. “They are my friends, I suppose, but really they’re more like relatives. I’ve always felt out of place among them.”

The thought of James being out of place anywhere struck Cordelia as funny. Compared to herself, he was self-assured, charismatic, effortlessly interesting. Compared to her awkward discomfort inside her own body, he was graceful and strikingly handsome—

Good Lord, Cordelia thought, where had that come from?

It was true, though. Among the pillars and medieval arches of the library he looked as at home as a marble statue, an oil painting of a classical youth at study. How could someone who matched his environment so perfectly be uncomfortable?

“I always feel out of place too,” she offered. “But I thought it was just because my family is always traveling so much. I’ve never stayed in one place long enough to make friends.” She looked down at the ground. “Maybe it’s more complicated than that.”

James said, “We’re friends, aren’t we?”

Cordelia gave a little laugh. “Well, yes. We are. But how often do we see each other? Once a year, maybe twice, if we’re lucky?”

He shrugged. “I don’t see most of the people at this party more than that, anyway. We’re always in London and they’re usually in Idris. Although we’re meant to go to Idris this summer, so perhaps I’ll see them a bit more. And of course, we’ll all be at the Academy this fall.” He sighed. “Maybe I’ll start to think of them as real friends at some point. I just feel so different than them. Like…like everyone else is looking out at the world, at other people, but I am always looking inward, instead.”

Since to Cordelia James appeared to glow from within slightly, this struck her as an odd facet of his personality, but she supposed that the shy and retiring came in all shapes and sizes. “‘All man’s miseries derive from not being able to sit in a quiet room alone,’” she quoted. “My father always says that.”

“Your father sounds very wise,” said James.

“Actually,” said Cordelia, “I think Blaise Pascal said that, and my father was only quoting him. You’d get along with my father,” she went on, surprised to find herself saying it out loud. But it was true; both her father and James had the same sense of the world being a bit too much for them, of preferring solitude, of seeking refuge in books. “I should go find him,” she said. “Again, I’m so sorry for interrupting your reading.”

James put the book down on the side table next to the window. “Again, please don’t apologize, I’m always happy for the opportunity to talk with you.” Cordelia found herself blushing, a bit, but James didn’t appear to notice. He stood up and said, smiling, “I shall escort you in your endeavor.”

On the way out of the library they fell silent, and Cordelia began to feel a bit awkward. It was usually so easy to speak with James, and yet she was unaccountably tongue-tied. Finally, desperate for a conversational gambit, she blurted, “Did you know that the original Paris Institute library burned down in 1574 when someone opened a Pyxis containing a Dragonidae demon?”

James raised his eyebrows. “I did not know that, Miss Carstairs,” he said, and Cordelia burst into giggles.

The smile was wiped quickly off her face, however, by the arrival of Alastair, who looked grim. “There you are,” he said, but he sounded more relieved than angry. He had a tired look in his eyes. “Father’s not well,” he said. “He’s asking for you.”

“Oh!” said Cordelia. She felt a brief, uncharitable flash of annoyance — her father’s sickness had spoiled so many parties, even Cordelia’s first rune-day. She turned to James. “I should go to him.”

“Of course,” said James. “I’m so sorry to hear he’s not well.”

“There’s an old monk’s chamber down that hall,” Alastair said, gesturing. “Father said he wanted to be someplace cool and dark.” He shook his head, agitated. “Sorry, Cordelia.”

Cordelia wasn’t sure what he meant—perhaps that it was usually her that Elias asked for when he wasn’t well, and not Alastair? She hoped it didn’t hurt Alastair’s feelings. She assumed it was because Elias believed girls made better nurses than boys, though she wasn’t sure that was true.

She left James and her brother there, looking askance at one another, and went down the hall until she found a short little heavy wooden door set in the wall. It swung open at her tentative push, and inside she found only a bit of dim light and a sparsely furnished room, with a small platform bed in the corner on which her father sat, his arm over his eyes.

“Papa,” she said, “I’m here.”

He groaned. “Cordelia, my love. It came on so suddenly.”

Cordelia felt a wash of guilt at having resented her father. “I know. I’m here, Papa.”

She went over to the bed and sat down next to him. The room was suffused with the strong smell, herbaceous and strongly bitter, that she associated with his episodes—the medicine that the Silent Brothers gave him to keep his health under control, she assumed.

“I’m sorry to ruin your party, Cordelia,” her father said after a moment. His voice was throaty, his words slow, as though it pained him to speak.

“No,” said Cordelia gently. “I’m sorry you’re not feeling well. I know you had looked forward to the party as well.”

He looked up from his arm and gazed at her fondly. “I already feel better now that you’re here.” He reached out and took her small hand in his larger one. “You’ve always been my best charm for getting well.”

Cordelia rubbed his hand anxiously. “What can I do, Papa? Is there anything you need?” She glanced around the room, looking for anything that might be helpful. Her eye fell on one of the room’s few decorations, a small shelf with a selection of cloth and leather-bound books arranged haphazardly across it. “I could read to you,” she said. That was what she would want if she were feeling ill, after all. To be read to would be the greatest act of love she could receive, so it only made sense to offer it here.

“Yes, that would be very nice.” Her father closed his eyes and smiled, as if in anticipation.

Cordelia went to examine the shelf. Doubtfully she said, “Well, in English we have either the 1817 classic How to Avoid Werewolves—”

“You mean, socially?”

“I’m not sure,” said Cordelia. “Your other option is the classic travelogue of the Shadowhunter Hezekiah Featherstone, Demons With Whom I Have Had Relationships.”

“Should you really be reading that second one?” her father rumbled.

“Papa!” said Cordelia, scandalized. “I don’t think they are romantic relationships.”

“Well then,” said Elias, settling back on the bed, and Cordelia thought he did already sound like he was feeling a bit better, “surprise me.”

James thought, it wasn’t Cordelia’s fault that he had been left alone with her older brother. It was only an unfortunate side-effect of the situation.

Though only a couple of years apart in age, James had always thought of Alastair as impossibly older than him, and Alastair, for his part, had treated James as impossibly younger. James supposed this was a natural result of being an older sibling. Certainly he could not imagine taking anyone fully seriously who was only his little sister’s age. In this circumstance, however, it left him unsure what to say to Alastair, or whether to wait for Alastair to speak, or whether to simply bolt from the room at top speed and assume Alastair was too slow to catch him.

Alastair ended the mystery by saying, in an odd tone, “My apologies for all this. My father is often unwell.”

“It’s all right,” James said, feeling strange to be reassuring an older boy. Tentatively he said, “Your father is a hero, after all.”

“What?” said Alastair, thrown off guard.

“Your father,” James said. “He killed the demon Yanluo.”

“Not by himself,” said Alastair.

“No,” said James, “but still. My father says an experience like that can leave scars. It’s a kind of sacrifice that heroes make, taking those scars so others don’t have to.”

He had meant it kindly, but was dismayed by the way Alastair’s face shut down. He became a blank, and when he looked at James, it was clear that he had ceased to regard James as being present in the room, or indeed, existing at all. “Quite,” he said. Without further comment he headed down the hallway toward the library..

“I’ll see you at the Academy,” James offered, one final try. “This fall. I’ll be starting.”

Alastair turned back, and in the same oddly neutral tone, he said, “That’s right. I suppose you will.”

After Alastair departed, James stayed where he was for a while, alone in the narrow, whitewashed corridor of the Institute. There was a party shaking the very rafters of the building, and yet here there was only silence. James thought of Cordelia, comforting her ill father, of Alastair stomping off for the sake of stomping off, obviously with no destination in mind.

His father had always made such an effort to get the two families together, the Herondales and the Carstairs. He had told so many stories about them, and was always encouraging their spending time together. And James had always been fond of the Carstairs, especially Cordelia. But now he thought, it’s odd, really, how little I know them as people.

He thought of the cousins, the parents’ friends, the Enclave members celebrating above. Other than his own family, he knew so little about any of them as people. And while he felt safe here, in the quiet, in the dark, he could tell that the world would not let him remain there for much longer. He would be out in the world, and he would need friends, and family, to help get him through.

Perhaps at the Academy, this fall.

#flash fiction #chain of gold #tsc #shadowhunters #the shadowhunter chronicles #.cog #cog2 #tlh #cassandra jean #cassandra clare

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heyheydidjaknow · 3 years

Text

I would’ve posted this earlier but, alas, I passed out early. This is a longer one, but tumblr got its act together so I can post it all in one part. You guys know where the other chapters are, and if you don’t, they’re at the end of the chapter. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go eat straight Nutella.

Chapter 10

“I’m thinking about getting some gloves.”

He looks over at you as he laces up his skates. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you nod, smiling slightly to yourself as you look your hands over, trying to imagine what they would look like. “Like, badass, fingerless gloves.”

He smiles. “Dude, those would look metal as fuck.”

“Totally, right?” Your smile widens. “With studs and shit.”

He gets to his feet, hopping onto the ice. “Hell yeah.” He drops a puck to assault as you go back to your backed-up coursework the best you can—your handwriting has gone to hell, but you are working with what you have.

You flinch at the crack of his stick, the cross of the T ending up underneath the letter somehow. A cheer from Casey tells you the rubber cylinder’s fate.

‘I swear I learned this.' You squint at the basic algebra, the pencil, crudely held in your fist, hovering over the packet. ‘Why can’t I do this?’

“How’s your pile coming along?” Another crack.

“It’s comin’.” You run your fingers through your hair. “Just… trynna remember how to do ne—… subtraction.” ‘Not debate. Negating is debate.’

He laughs. Another crack. “Man, that thing really fucked you over, huh?”

“Thoroughly.” You decide against continuing to torture yourself, having been at it for the past five hours—most of it in the library before Casey invited you to watch him practice some more— and set the large stack of homework back in your bag. “Are you actually making the shots?”

“Casey Jones doesn’t miss shots.” Another crack.

“Pardon me, oh almighty king of the ice.” You stand on your good leg, grabbing the side of the wall to watch as he went back to collect his pucks.

You two have managed to bond over a mutual respect/love of heavy metal and hockey and, seeing as you are staying out of the Hamatos’ hair for a while—not upon request, but out of courtesy—you have managed to spend a lot more time with him than you may have otherwise. Your school has not assigned Biology any big projects yet, so, until you are assigned it, you do not have anything other than your health to stress about.

“Pardon accepted.” You watch his form as he performs another slap shot.

“You…” you trail off, trying to remember what you were going to say.

“What?”

You shrug. “Dunno.” You lean your head on your arms. “I’ll remember eventually.”

He drops the second puck. “Got any plans after this?”

You sigh. “Nope. Probably gonna head home and try not to cut my fingers making dinner again.”

He takes another shot. “Then let’s go out after this. You and me.”

You smile. “What, don’t have any plans either?”

“Nah.” He drops the third. “Dad doesn’t care if I’m home late anyway.”

“True, true.” You have decided against prying into his home life; it is not your place and does not concern you in the slightest. “Where do you wanna go?”

“Wanna catch a movie? Heard there was this new pizza place just a couple blocks down if you wanna try to sneak it in.”

You snicker. “In the box and all?”

“Yes.” He grins mischievously and hits this one off the walls. Some way, somehow, it still makes it into the goal. “I bet your sweatshirt is big enough to stick the box under.”

You stick your tongue out at him. “Not in the mood for burns on top of scars, Jones,” you reprimand him teasingly. “That just ain't it.”

“Then you can wear mine under that one and—”

“Your sweat-soaked hoodie you’ve been practicing in all day?” You cringe at the thought. “Over my dead body.”

“I mean…” he licks his teeth, smile widening, “it’s not exactly like you’re in the best—”

You laugh. “So not cool!”

He puts his hands up in defense, gliding over. “I mean, am I wrong, though?”

“That is completely besides the point, you ass.” You balance on your foot, crossing your arms. “Damn. Making fun of the girl with the broken leg.”

He leans against the wall. “Man, you were dying before the crash.”

You roll your eyes. “Alright, whatever, Jones.” You lean against your hand. “How’s Johanna,” you sing.

He presses his hand against your face, pushing you away. “Annie is doing fine.”

You grin, steadying yourself on the wall. “Do you feel her, Johanna?”

“I’m gonna tell her you call her that if you don’t quit it.”

“Do you think that walls can hide her? Even when you’re at her window?”

He pushed his arm all the way out. You hop back.

“Her name isn’t even Johanna.”

“But she is Johanna,” you whine in protest, not bothering to hide your mirth. “She has the hair, the voice, the disposition. She’s an ingénue and you know it.” You have been teasing him about this for a while now: the girl in question—Annabelle Halshaw, a year below you two—had caught his eye when he had heard through the grapevine that she was the lead singer in some indie band. When he had shown you a picture and told you the story, you insisted on calling her Johanna for her golden hair and soft, sweet singing voice he had proudly had you listen to.

“She’s not.”

You roll your eyes, sitting back down as you grab your bag. “Lie to yourself all you want,” you goad, “but deep down, you know in your heart that the truth,” you put a finger up, “is apparent.”

He hops off the ice, sitting next to you as he unlaces his skates. “Whatever.” He smirks. “How’s The Don?”

You avert your gaze. “I haven’t seen ‘im.”

“Boo.” He tied the laces together. “Some girlfriend you are,” he ribs.

You go red. “Not my boyfriend. Not even friends with benefits.”

“Yeah, sure.” He sets the skates into his bag. “That’s why you already know his family.”

“That—”

“And why you’ve had him over to your place.”

“If you don’t cool your tits, I’m telling Lucy you’re crushing on her friend.”

“Don’t you dare!”

“What,” you simper, “think I won’t?”

He grabs his bag. “If you do, I’ll show her that video.”

You laugh, following him out of the rink. “You’re the worst.” You note how strange it is that he spent so little time on the ice as you two walk out, but you do not say anything about it.

“Hey, you’re the one throwing threats around.”

“Yeah,” you argue, “but my threat is clearly better.”

He rolls his eyes, pushing you again.

You two keep chatting on the way to the theatre about anything and everything, from new bands to upcoming games to the newest blockbuster horror movies. You are not personally on the hockey team, but, as his friend, it is your duty to care. Besides, you figure, it gives you something to look forward to.

The movie is fine. You convince him against sneaking an entire pizza in, you split a bucket of popcorn, and you give him shit for getting freaked out by the disembowelment scene. It is payback for him teasing you about crying during the last movie you two went to a couple of days ago.

You two stand at the streetlight.

“Dude, it’s like eight,” he groans. “It’s not even late.”

“True,” you agree. “Counterpoint: I still have another week’s worth of work to do by Friday on top of the homework I’ll have to do anyway, so unless you wanna help—”

“Forget I asked.” He pulls his hood up against the autumn wind. “Need me to walk you back?”

“Nah.” You shrug. “If someone mugs me, they’ll give me an excuse to not do my homework.”

“Murdered?

“I’m already halfway there.”

He grins. “See ya tomorrow, Y/N.”

“See ya, Jones.” You wave as he runs off.

The walk home is quiet and considerably easier than it was a couple of weeks ago. Seeing as you now get queasy whenever you get into a car, you have been limited to taking the subway and walking, which, among other things, has contributed positively to your physical strength. You know that you should probably at least try to take the bus or a cab around town to build your tolerance up, but the last time you tried, you had almost tripped and fallen from how shaky your legs were getting out. Oddly enough, you note as you go through the door, you do not have a considerably larger fear of heights than you did before, or of fire, but cars were tripping you up, even though you were the one that crashed it. You feel thankful that, at least, you do not think your fear is crippling. At least, you reason, you can still get into the car.

You lock the door behind you, debating whether you feel like adding to the collection of cuts you now possess— they are self-inflicted, but not intentionally so; you stubbornly refuse to acknowledge the fact that you physically cannot use your hands to cut things. You decide against it tonight, tossing your bag on the bed as you sprawl across it, admittedly exhausted. You allow yourself a couple of seconds with your eyes closed before you pull yourself up with a groan and get back to work.

A part of you wishes that you had the physical energy to stay out longer. You are always trying to find excuses not to sleep, and although the mountain of homework and readjusting your timelines for things you missed is certainly one way to keep yourself preoccupied, it is not exactly what you would consider fun. Then again, reliving your greatest traumas while you sleep is not exactly fun either.

You catch yourself peeling at the newly applied bandages on your fingers, fingernails catching under the crudely applied adhesives. Applying bandages properly requires more dexterity and patience than you currently possess, and you are hardly going to ask someone else for help with something as stupid as that. You have lasted this long without needing too much help. People can live by themselves. You will live, probably. Well? Not your concern.

‘I should eat something.’ Your eyes strain to focus on the piece of paper in front of you, your mind wandering aimlessly as you try to impress the actual importance of finishing this upon yourself, but you find that is an insurmountable feat.

You drop your bag off the side of the bed, reaching down and pulling your shoe off, leaning back into your pillows, the weight of the day practically immobilizing you. Fumbling hands switch the lamp off, bathing your room in momentary, blissful darkness before the gravity of your decision sets in.

“Alright, me,” you breathe to yourself. “What’s it gonna be today? My folks? Bradford? What’s his face? Hell,” you chuckle, “why not all three? I’m sadistic enough, I’m sure.”

You close your eyes. “Give me your worse,” you challenge as you slip into unconsciousness.

Two weeks.

He had kept his distance for about two weeks. It was not as if he did not care or was not morbidly curious what the crash had done to you—his glances through the curtains did not tell him much-- but, after some debate, he had figured you needed time to recuperate before you would want his company. Two weeks, he figured, would be enough time for you to get back on your feet or, at least, for you to start wanting company.

His excuse to see you had come in the form of his brother’s newfound prideful boasting. Feigning insult was as good an excuse as any to go see you; after all, he just so happened to be in the neighborhood anyway, and it was normal to pop in to see someone if you were already just a couple blocks down, right? Sneaking away was easy enough—they would not mind his absence—and he, after much prep work, knew exactly how and why he was going to say the things he would to get in your good favor. The plan, he knows, would have gone swimmingly.

His plans seem asinine when he hears you crying.

His brothers do not cry much. He does not, either; it was a habit that they had all thoroughly bullied themselves out of when they were much younger and, if they still did, he knew nothing of it. His master did not encourage this, per se, but talked, then, frequently about the importance of maintaining a more stoic disposition and not allowing emotions to cripple you in battle. Practically, Donatello was satisfied with that explanation, having not properly cried for more than a year now. To hear the sound again, especially coming from you, was novel.

Novel, too, is how you are crying. The sound is less of actual sobbing and more of you being strangled, quiet gasps for air escaping your lips as you shake on the bed, curled in on yourself and clutching at your chest as if whatever pain you are experiencing is centered and can be relieved by something between your collarbones. His eyes, for the first time, trace the lines on your skin, your sleeves riding up your arms to reveal them to him, tears racing down and along the gash in your face. Everything about the scene, from the soft gasping of panic to your position to the heavy scarring, is completely foreign to him, rivaled only by one or two particularly hard nights when he and his brother were much younger.

He slides in through the window, leaning onto the bed. His fingers flick your lamp back on as he grabs your shivering shoulder tightly, shaking you awake as he mumbles words of encouragement. He is not sure if his help will be appreciated, if snapping you out of it was even what he is supposed to do in this situation, but now is not the time to think of that. You are in pain. He can offer you this kindness. “Wake up,” he pleads, not thinking of how this would look until your eyes snap open to look at him.

Immediately, the reality of the situation sets in, and he scrambles off the bed. ‘Why did I think that would be a good idea?’ Panic. ‘You just walked into her room like a fucking creep. See, now she’s going to—’

“Sorry.”

He blinks, looking up at you from his place on the floor. “Huh?”

You clear your throat, wiping the tears from your eye with your sleeve quickly as you bring your knees to your chest, voice hoarse. “Sorry,” you repeat. “That you… I’m not sure what I’m apologizing for, but I know I should be apologizing.”

He is completely dumbfounded.

Your eyes glance to the open window. “I should probably start closing and locking my window, right?” You rub the back of your neck, voice clearing the longer you talk. “It didn’t occur to me since I’m so high up, but if you guys can get in, The Foot can too, right?”

‘Why is she apologizing?’

You push the hair out of your face. ‘You need something, right? I—uh—need to stop saying ‘right’ so much.” You shake your head to clear it. “’ Sup?”

He hears himself mumble some bullshit out about being in the neighborhood.

You sigh. “Sorry.” You close your eyes. “I’m usually up later; I’ve been so tired lately.”

‘Is she serious right now?’ He is completely lost. ‘She was just crying her eyes out in her sleep and now she’s apologizing? Did I miss something?’ You are smiling now, eyes still bloodshot, as if the whole thing is a figment of his imagination, still shivering where you sit.

He rises to his feet, kneeling in front of you on the bed. “What was it about?”

You blink, seemingly confused. “Huh?”

“Your nightmare,” he clarifies. “You were crying. What was it about?”

You avert eye contact. “Nothing too crazy,” you shrug. “Just about the crash. Nothing too exciting.” If possible, he thinks the bags under your eyes are worse than the last time you saw him.

He takes your hands loosely, turning them palms up to look, for the first time, at the patchwork quilt that is now your skin. “What happened in it?” He runs his thumb along the lines, keeping his voice low; he remembers how that used to help when Mikey used to have fits when they were younger. Leonardo and Raphael were never good at that; they took better to being more violently snapped out of their moods, but, then again, they never had this kind of breakdown; theirs were always more driven by loathing, self or otherwise.

You pause, still not looking him in the face as your muscles relax. He remembers, vividly, how he had done something similar when you two had first met, how much better, health-wise, you looked. ‘How long has it been since then? Three months? A little less?’

You take a deep breath. “Just… family shit,” you mumble, eyelids drooping as you trace his frame loosely. “Fire.”

Your gaze is piercing as you finally look at him properly. He feels something catch in his throat as you bow your head.

“It’s my fault, you know.” Your voice is so soft, barely a whisper. “That they’re dead, I mean.”

The air is a suffocating blanket that smothers you both.

“I never told you, did I?” Your focus does not shift as it might have a bit ago. It is locked solely and intensely on him, taking in every detail of his expression. “How I died? How they died? Why I died?”

Hesitantly, he shakes his head. He thinks it best to just be quiet and let you talk. He does not think he has ever heard anyone speak in quite the same tones, ever looked at him quite the same way you are.

You take another breath. “I wanted to try my hand at baking.” You force your eyes to stay focused on his. “I was—still am—not good about sleep. I always slept bad, and never at the right times. I used to take pills for it, to try to get myself back on track.”

He sees where this is going.

“I thought I could still stay up as late as I was used to.” You glance to the side, stealing yourself a second before focusing back on the boy in front of you. “I sat down in my room, turned on a movie. I set a timer. I fell asleep.” You swallow, hands shaking in his. “I can’t smell well, either. I must not have smelled the burning.” Your lips curl in a bitter smile. “Sure as fuck felt it, though, when I woke up.”

He lets you finish.

You try to blink the tears out of your eyes. “They were asleep,” Your voice rises ever so slightly. “I fell asleep at two something. I woke up when they started yelling.” You purse your lips, face reddening in shame as your nostrils flair. “They were trying to get someone out of bed when the roof caved in above them. My door got blocked.”

You feel yourself smile.

“So,” you strain not to cry, “that, Donatello, is why I’m here and why I’m dead, and why I really do deserve to burn again.” You laugh. “Hell, my body count is rivaling some serial killers, so that’s… that’s certainly something.”

He lets go of your hands, face blank.

You lean forward, placing your hands on your knees. “I don’t blame you,” You wipe a wayward tear out of your eyes, trying to swallow the frog in your throat. “Fuck, man, I’d think less of me, too, if it were me.” You nod towards the window. “I get it if you want to leave, but I thought you might want to know why—”

He stops you mid-sentence, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you to him.

Your arms lay slack at your sides as you try to process what is happening.

He does not say a word.

You break.

You burry your face into him, tears welling in your eyes as you let out a strangled sob. You hold onto him tightly as you struggle to breathe, body shaking as you wrap your own arms around him the best you can. The sound roars in your ears like thunder, the deafening quiet of the apartment punctuated only by your own cries. He gently holds you there, resting his head on top of yours. Each sound you make sounds as though you are physically being choked by your guilt, and his chest feels as though it is being crushed by an invisible hand as he listens to your pain.

Neither of you knows how long you stay like that.

He considers telling you a story from a long time ago, about some training he and his brothers had back then, but thought better of it; he does not want to upset you any more than you already are, and being in good company with someone like him may not be exactly what you need right now. Granted, he does not know what you do need, but he knows listening to him talk about bashing brains would not help your sensibilities any.

Instead, he stays quiet.

You pull away after a while, wiping your face off again as you mumble out an apology.

“Don’t apologize.” He clears his throat. “It’s good to cry; it releases endorphins.”

You smile at that. “Well,” you giggle tearfully, “if it releases endorphins.”

He smiles back, face flushing. You look good, he thinks, even with your face all red. He knows that, scientifically, there is probably a reason, but he cannot think of it right now.

He stands up. “I’ll get—”

You grab his hand tightly.

He looks back at you.

“Can I ask a favor?”

He blinks. “Of course,” he agrees easily. “Anything.”

You glance off. “Promise not to take it weird?”

He feels his heart rate increase. “Y-yeah,” he nods.

He feels you pull him gently back on the bed. “Can you stay here tonight?”

His eyes widen as they flicker between the mattress and you. “What,” he clarifies breathlessly, “like sleep with you?”

You nod.

“In the same bed?”

You hesitate, nod again.

He clears his throat, face heating again. “Like, actually?”

“If it wasn’t actually, I wouldn’t ask, would I?” You grip his hand tightly. “I just really don’t want to be alone tonight.”

‘Oh.’ He mentally kicks himself. ‘She’s scared. Don’t make her uncomfortable.’

“It’s alright if you don’t—”

He is extremely quick to reassure you that he is more than happy—‘Bad choice of wording.’—to stay tonight until you fall asleep, but that he would not stay the whole night as to not worry his brothers.

You nod in agreement. “That’s fine.” You rub the back of your neck. “Not sure I would be good company when I wake up, anyway; I still have class.”

“Oh, right.” He nods in understanding, pushing himself further onto the bed. “Which side…?”

You shrug. “Which way do you face?”

“I usually lie on my stomach.”

“Then it doesn’t matter.” You slide your sweatshirt over your head after a bit of squirming around, tossing it onto the couch.

His face is now scarlet. “Okay then,” he mumbles, laying down on the side away from the window. ‘Is she going to—no, stop that.’

You look over at him, face down on the mattress. You can almost feel the heat coming off him. “Are you alright there, buddy?”

He nods.

You shrug, laying down under the blanket and curling into him, facing the window. “Mind getting the light?”

He reaches over, clicking it off.

You sigh in content, turning to face him, teetering on the edge of the mattress. “I’m not venomous,” you inform him teasingly. “I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: of the two of us, you should not be the one who’s a nervous wreck.”

“You dunno that.” His voice is muffled by the bed.

“You’re the strong one,” you argue.

“So?” He turns his head to look at you. “I’m the guy laying in the—I’m just gonna stop that sentence.”

“It’s only bad if it isn’t consensual.” You smile reassuringly. “I invited you to lay with me, right? So, unless I make you uneasy, then we’re all good.”

He breaks eye contact. “So,” he clarifies, “you don’t mind if I move closer to you?”

You shake your head.

He hesitantly slides himself further onto the bed. “Can I move closer than this?”

“You’ve already seen me bawl my eyes out. You’re doing me a service. Move as close or as far as you want.”

He moves to press his side against you. “Is this fine?”

You nod. “Look, how about this?” You rest your arm under your head. “If you do something I’m uncomfortable with, the safe word is pina colada.”

‘We already have a safe word?’ He was not sure if he is on cloud nine or just terrified of you.

You are very confused why he looks so warm. “Do you need me to turn the AC on?”

He shakes his head. “I’m good,” he assures you tightly. Slowly, he reached an arm out and over your waist, pulling you closer. You do not seem to resist in any way, wrapping your good leg around one of his to pull him closer.

‘Conscious touching.’ He glances down at you, trying to act cool. ‘Conscious, intentional touching. She smells so nice and she feels—okay, this is not going to work if you keep being a perv.’

“Thanks,” you mumble, humming softly. “I appreciate this more than you know.”

Cloud nine. Definitely on cloud nine.

“Every time.”

You giggle.

He blinks. “What?”

“Every time,” you note, already nodding off. “Like in that book.”

‘Which one?’ “They wrote it down for a reason, right?” The longer he spends like this, the smoother he feels.

“Totally.” You smile, closing your eyes. “Just know that this goes both ways, alright? If you ever need help like this, you know who to call.”

This is new. ‘Help like this? What, like crying?’ His eyebrows furrow as he tries to understand what you mean. ‘Or he means if I ever need company in my—what did I just say?’

You pick up on his confusion. “Emotional help, I mean.” Your fingers trace the indentations in his shell absentmindedly. “I mean, I know sometimes I didn’t want to go to my family about stuff. I dunno if you have that…” you trail off, realizing that you might be unintentionally bashing his brothers. You sincerely do not want to blow this.

“I mean,” he says after a bit, “I think I get what you’re talking about.” He sighs. “You mean stuff that they’d make fun of me for, right?”

You nod.

He feels his heart melt a little. “I’ll have to take you up on that.”

You forgot how safe he makes you feel. “Goodnight, Donnie,” you mumble sleepily.

“Goodnight, Y/N.”

You pass out not long after that. If he has to estimate a general amount of time, he will clock it in at about five minutes. He does not move, however, until about thirty minutes before sunrise, too busy listening to the sound of your breathing and memorizing how exactly your body feels next to his. As he slips out of the window, early morning air waking him back up completely, he wonders if, someday, he could stay to see you wake up next to him. Not out of necessity, but just because you both wanted to stay like that for a while more.

‘I hope so. It’s a nice dream to have, anyhow.’

Table of Contents

Chapter 9

Chapter 11

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mashtonasfuck · 4 years

Text

there’s a ghost in the back of this room

Pairing: Ashton Irwin x Calum Hood (and also a bonus side of muke that happened accidentally)

Prompt:

Person B is a ghost in Person A’s house and they would be really freaked out but Person B always leaves really good advice using the kitchen magnets, so Person A is not really bothered

Warnings: mention of a missing person who reader knows is dead/a ghost

Word Count: 3K

A note from Lucy: This is part of the halloween writers collab organised by @maluminspace and @h0tsos. The masterlist can be found here. See the end of the post for more notes. Hey look, I managed to write cashton fic without it turning into smut! Thanks to @loveroflrh and @kindahoping4forever for reading this over for me 💙

If you’d like to be added to my tag list then please fill in this form

You can find my masterlist here

This work must not be reposted anywhere - I do not give my permission for it to appear anywhere other than on my blog, or on my ao3 page.

——————————————————————————

“Ashton, why does your fridge say ‘stop being an idiot’?” Ashton glanced over to where Luke was staring at the fridge door in mild amusement.

“Oh, that’s just Calum - ignore him. I usually do” Ashton rolled his eyes as a picture fell off the wall as he finished speaking, the thud causing Luke to spin around, eyes wide.

“What was that?”

“I just brushed past the picture and knocked it off, that’s all.”

Luke narrowed his eyes at Ashton, the older man chuckling as he hung the picture back up.

“Come on, let’s watch this damn movie you don’t shut up about.”

–

Why did you tell Luke to ignore me

The question was on Ashton’s fridge the next morning, the letters a mishmash of colours and cases. Ashton pinched the bridge of his nose as he read it - only he would get a self conscious ghost living in his house.

“Calum, are you here?”

A cupboard door opened and a mug floated down onto the counter a few feet away from him - Ashton took that as a yes and shoved a pod into his coffee machine before grabbing the mug and pushing the button.

“I was only messing with you, Cal. Besides, you’re my ghost, it has nothing to do with Luke.”

Ashton watched as the letters on the fridge rearranged themselves, sipping on his coffee and humming at the bitterness dancing on his tongue.

Do you not want your friends to know about me

Ashton groaned internally, how could he explain this to his house ghost without offending him?

“I think they’d be pretty freaked out if they knew I lived with a ghost. You saw Luke’s reaction to you knocking that picture off the wall. Besides, I like keeping you a secret, you’re mine.”

It’s pretty hard for me to be yours when you’ve never even seen me

Ashton had in fact seen Calum. Or at least a photo of Calum.

–

He hadn’t been in the house more than a month when he started to realise that things kept happening. A photo moved slightly, the couch not being quite as tidy as he’d left it. The day Ashton had realised he actually had a ghost, he’d come home to find a new photo of him and Luke floating in midair.

“Um, hello?”

The photograph was dropped hastily, as though Ashton had scared the ghost he evidently had living in his house. After that, Ashton started talking to the ghost, even though he never got a reply aside from the odd knock on a table or a wall. It was while he was at a store grabbing something for dinner that he saw the fridge magnets. He grabbed all of the packets they had and drove home with a grin on his face.

“So, I bought you these today,” Ashton held out the magnets towards where he hoped his ghost was, “I thought maybe you could try talking back to me?”

Ashton felt a small whoosh of air as the ghost moved around the kitchen and he tore open the first packet, dumping the contents into a drawer he never used. Almost immediately the letters started floating from the drawer towards his fridge and Ashton watched as the ghost arranged the letters into a sentence.

Hello Ashton

“Hello, ghost. Oh - what’s your name? It feels weird calling you ‘ghost’.”

The letters arranged themselves once again.

My name is Calum

“Nice to finally know your name, Calum. How was your day?”

I’m a ghost Ashton

The brunette snorted as he watched the letters form another sentence.

Boring thank u for asking

Ashton laughed before spending the next few hours conversing with his ghost - with Calum - via fridge magnets. Calum had told him his full name after Ashton insisted upon knowing it.

“If you ever piss me off, I need to know what to call you.”

Calum Hood

It lingered there for a few seconds before ‘Hood’ was moved over.

Calum Thomas Hood

Ashton turned it over in his mind. Why did that name sound so familiar to him? He thought nothing more of it until he was at work a few days later.

STILL NO SIGN OF MISSING MAN

Police are still searching for Calum Thomas Hood, 24, who disappeared from his home 6 months ago. They’re urging anyone who may know anything about his disappearance to come forward.

Attached to the article had been a photo of the missing man, and Ashton knew it was his Calum. (He’d later cut the photograph out of the newspaper and taped it to the bottom of his desk drawer where no one would find it.) When he’d got home from work that day, Ashton had asked Calum how he’d died.

Not sure don’t remember

Ashton had debated telling the police that he knew exactly where Calum Thomas Hood - or at least his soul - was. He’d told Calum this one evening and a single word had appeared on his fridge.

Crazy

–

Calum was bored.

Sure, being a ghost meant that he could walk through walls and move things with his mind, but being bound to one place had its drawbacks. There were only so many times you could move things around waiting to see how long it took Ashton to find them before you’d moved everything.

(He’d even tried to swap all the furniture in Ashton’s bedroom with all the furniture in his living room, but Ashton had come home earlier than Calum had anticipated and made him put it all back to normal without any help. Moving things with your mind was tiring.

“You’re a ghost, Cal, how can you get tired?”

Calum had used all of the ‘i’s and the ‘l’s to make a middle finger on Ashton’s fridge door.)

Calum thought that Ashton could sense how restless he was. Ashton seemed to find new reasons to work from home during the day so Calum wasn’t by himself. Not that they could really interact unless Ashton was in the kitchen. They’d tried using a pen and some paper once, but Calum’s ghostly abilities didn’t seem to extend to pens. He couldn’t seem to get the pressure right to actually leave ink on the paper. Ashton had laughed at him before being met with a cushion to the face.

Calum missed being alive. He missed being able to go outside. He missed coffee. He missed being able to pet dogs.

Most of all, he was frustrated that he couldn’t remember how he’d even become a ghost. At night while Ashton was asleep, Calum tried to remember what had happened. (There wasn’t much else to do while your best friend was sleeping.) He’d get so far into the memory and then something would tug him back into the present moment. It was disconcerting. Calum could sense that he was close to finding out the truth, but something was stopping him. He’d tried to explain it to Ashton but ran out of letters and gave up. He’d debated asking the other man to buy more, but had resigned himself to the fact that it just wasn’t worth it. Ashton wasn’t going to be able to help him figure out what had happened - it was something he needed to figure out for himself.

–

“Hey Cal, how do you feel about me throwing a Halloween party this year?”

Although Ashton couldn’t see him, he knew that Calum had raised an eyebrow at his question.

It’s your house Ashton

“Well excuse me for wanting to make sure my resident ghost wasn’t inconvenienced.” Ashton smirked at his fridge as Calum spelt out a new message.

Appreciate it

Sure, have a party

Ashton cheered aloud and began reeling off his ideas to Calum, barely giving the ghost time to form a sentence. Calum shook his head fondly at the man standing opposite him - if Calum had been alive and met Ashton, he was sure that they’d have been best friends. When Ashton had finished speaking, Calum had one thing to say.

You already have a haunted house Ash

–

The party had taken Ashton weeks of planning and he’d dragged Luke into the prep early on in the process.

Calum liked having Luke around - he was fun to mess with. He’d taken to moving Luke’s glass from wherever he’d put it down and putting it on the other side of the room. Watching Luke’s bewilderment was a new favourite activity of Calum’s - Ashton had to keep taking the fall for his antics.

As Halloween rolled around, Ashton’s house really did look haunted. Every room was shrouded in black and there were cobwebs all over the place. (Calum’s favourite thing was the skeleton hiding behind the downstairs closet door that jumped out whenever you walked past it.) According to Ashton, the outside looked just as scary as the inside, but Calum had to take his word for it.

As people started arriving, Calum retreated into Ashton’s room. He didn’t usually go anywhere near the other man’s room, but Ashton had told him that it was okay if he needed to get away from all the people. Calum was worried about being walked through. Ashton had done it a few times by accident, and Calum had felt sick every time it had happened. That was something they were both eager to avoid, especially once Calum had explained to Ashton how it felt.

A knock on Ashton’s bedroom door piqued Calum’s interest and Luke’s head appeared around the door frame.

“Ash, are you - oh. You’re not here.” Luke started to close the door but stopped suddenly, pushing it back open and slipping inside before closing it behind him. He glanced around a few times, gaze running over where Calum was sitting on the end of the bed.

“This is going to sound crazy, but is there someone else in here?”

Calum cocked his head at Luke’s words; he knew that Ashton wasn’t particularly forthcoming with Luke about his existence. He shifted off the end of the bed, moving across the room to stand about a foot away from Luke. The blonde let out a breath as he felt the temperature in the room drop slightly.

“Calum, right?” Luke’s voice was quiet as he spoke, Calum smiling at the fact that Luke remembered his name. He picked up a pillow from Ashton’s bed in response, tossing it gently towards Luke. The other man caught it easily, eyes growing wide at the pillow that was suddenly in his arms.

“Holy shit, you are actually real.”

Calum let out a laugh at Luke’s words, amazement etched into the blonde’s face.

“I’ll be right back, don’t go anywhere.”

The blonde left the room, returning a few minutes later with an armful of stuff. He dropped it all on Ashton’s bed before turning around and facing the room.

“So, um, I bought a small magnetic whiteboard and some of the letters from Ashton’s kitchen drawer and I was wondering if we could talk about something?”

Luke watched in shock as the letters began arranging themselves on the whiteboard.

Hi Luke

What’s up

Luke sucked in a breath before he started talking.

–

Calum knew this was crazy.

Luke was crazy.

Just because it was Halloween, it didn’t mean that Ashton would suddenly be able to see him. Calum had always thought the whole ‘veil being thinner on Halloween’ thing was bullshit. Luke was insistent that it wasn’t, telling him that if anyone would be able to see him it would be Ashton.

“He’s in love with you, I think.”

The way Luke had said it had been so casual, but it sent Calum’s mind reeling. Ashton couldn’t possibly love him. He barely even knew him. Luke had dismissed Calum’s concerns before he’d even completed a sentence on the board. The more Calum thought about it, the more he was sure that he was the one in love with Ashton. He paused rearranging the letters for a moment as he stared at Luke.

Think I love him too

Luke had lit up with a smile at Calum’s words before slipping out of the room to find Ashton.

Calum was sure if he had any contents in his stomach, that they would be on their way out by now. He was so nervous. Luke was so sure that this would work, that Calum found himself believing the blonde man wholeheartedly. It felt like an eternity before Luke finally returned dragging Ashton behind him, along with another man that Calum had never seen before.

“Calum, this is Michael. He’s my boyfriend and he’s also slightly psychic.”

Michael blushed a deep red at Luke’s words, scanning the room before he locked eyes with Calum.

“Hello, Calum.”

Calum waved gingerly at the green eyed man staring at him, Michael breaking out into a smile. He glanced at Luke and nodded slightly, the blonde smirking at Ashton. Ashton was standing behind Luke looking bewildered as he watched the exchange between his friends.

“Can someone please explain to me what’s going on? Luke, how did you find out about Calum?”

Luke glanced over his shoulder at the brunette man and rolled his eyes.

“Please, I don’t know why you thought no one would find the picture you’d taped to your desk drawer. Coupled with the fact that you kept blaming ‘Calum’ for things. You weren’t exactly subtle, Ash. I put two and two together and did a google search.”

Ashton’s jaw dropped open as Luke spoke, Calum snickering at his reaction. Michael smiled widely at Calum and turned to face Ashton.

“You already know what Calum looks like, right?”

Ashton nodded slowly, fearful of where this was going.

“As we all know, the veil is thinner on Halloween, therefore allowing spirits to pass between the realms. I’ve never tried to bring an actual ghost through the veil, but there’s a first time for everything, right?” Michael rolled his shoulders as he spoke, turning back to face Calum. “Provided this goes right, we should all be able to see you. I mean, I already can. But Luke and Ashton too. Worst case scenario is that only I can see you, and this doesn’t work. You only live once though, right?”

Calum rolled his eyes at Michael’s words, bracing himself for whatever the man was about to do.

“Oh, wait.” Michael glanced at Ashton before looking back towards Calum, “Say something to me, Calum. I need to know if I can hear you already or not.”

Calum raised an eyebrow at Michael.

“You’re such a know-it-all, Michael.”

Michael broke out into laughter, Luke and Ashton looking at him in confusion.

“This is gonna be fun, nice to meet you Calum.” Michael smirked at him before cracking his knuckles, “You’re gonna fit right in with us all, I’m sure of that.”

“Michael, what exactly are you going to do?” Ashton’s voice was nervous, he didn’t like the fact that Michael could see Calum when he couldn’t.

“We, my dear friends, are going to summon Calum firmly into the realm of the living.”

–

Calum felt the air around him grow fuzzy as he watched the three figures sat on the floor in front of him.

“Now Ashton, I need you to imagine Calum standing right in front of you. Really imagine it. See him in your mind’s eye. You got it? Good.” Michael looked away from Ashton and back towards Calum. “Cal, whenever you’re ready, I need you to come and stand in front of Ashton. I’m 80% sure that this is going to work. It depends how well Ashton is visualising.”

The brunette huffed in Michael’s direction and Calum smirked.

“Is he always like this when I’m not around?”

Michael grinned at Calum before nodding and gesturing to the spot on the floor in front of Ashton.

“Whenever you’re ready, Calum.”

–

Holy shit

“Cal?” Ashton’s voice was barely a whisper as he stared at the man suddenly standing before him.

“Hi, Ash.” Calum blushed under the other man’s gaze, casting a look towards Luke and Michael who were both sat on the floor smirking.

Ashton blinked a few times before slowly standing up and reaching towards Calum. The other man grabbed his arm as he stood, helping to pull him off the floor.

“How - how are you corporeal right now?” Ashton looked over at Michael who simply shrugged in return.

“You must be really good at visualising. It was only supposed to make Calum visible and hearable. Whether or not he was corporeal was out of my control.” Michael pulled Luke to his feet as he stood up, taking the blonde’s hand, “Now, if you don’t mind, I need to go and make out with my boyfriend in Ashton’s spare room. Nice to meet you, Cal. I daresay we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other in the near future.”

Michael dragged Luke from the room, the blonde waving absentmindedly at Ashton and Calum as they retreated, closing the door behind them.

“It’s really you.” Ashton ran his hand up Calum’s arm. The other man was wearing the same clothes as in the photo Ashton had seen, Calum’s leather jacket feeling smooth against his fingers.

“It’s really me, Ash.” Calum brought a hand up rest against the back of Ashton’ neck. “It’s so weird to be able to talk to you and for you to actually be able to hear me.”

Ashton laughed quietly at Calum’s words, leaning forwards to rest their foreheads together.

“I can’t believe you’re really standing here and I can see you. Remind me to get Michael a case of beer or something.”

“Noted.” Calum grabbed both of Ashton’s hands, lacing their fingers together. “I’ve thought about being able to touch you for so long.”

Ashton hummed quietly at the other man’s words, the realisation finally setting in.

Calum was here. He could see Calum. He could hear him. He could feel him.

“Ash, I need to tell you something.” Calum nudged Ashton’s head up so they were eye to eye. “I’m pretty sure I’m in love with you.”

Ashton smiled softly at the admission.

“Pretty sure I’m in love with you too, Cal. I mean, it’s kinda complicated because you’re a ghost and all, but I really do love you.”

Calum searched Ashton’s face for any sign of hesitancy before closing the distance between them.

——————————————————————————

Notes: I deliberately left this open ended so I can come back to it in the future. I hope you like it, I’m really unsure about it 🥺 please let me know what you think here

Taglist: @pxrxmoore, @irwinkitten, @kindahoping4forever, @sadistmichael, @loveroflrh, @adoringlrh, @pinkbubbles-and-bigtroubles, @maluminspace, @malumsmermaid, @lashtonswildflower, @irwindoll, @castaway-cashton, @everyscarisahealingplace, @converse-luke, @zhangyixingxing1, @mrs-joel-pimentel-23-25

#cashtonasfuck #cashtonasfuck writes #superbloomirwin #superbloomirwin writes #ashton irwin fic #calum hood fic #cashton fic #5sos writing collab #5sos fic #5 seconds of summer fic #cashton fanfic #cashton fluff

62 notes · View notes

verstappenist · 4 years

Text

I Dare You | Ben Hardy

A/n: I just want to say that this is my first time writing for Ben, so I’m sorry if it’s bad... Also, English is not my first language so there could be some mistakes... Constructive criticism is appreciated!

The first part of this is College!Ben, the second part is current Ben! It is based on a prompt I found somewhere on Pinterest and sadly didn’t save...

Big thank you to @anotheronebitestheskye for convincing me to post this ily💗

Word Count: 1,601

Warnings: None!

Your and Ben’s story began nearly a decade ago, when you both went to the Royal Central School of Speech and Drama in London.

You had most classes together and would consider yourselves as good friends. Especially after starring in one of the plays together and spending hours upon hours in each others flats running lines to present the professor the perfect result.

Ben and you have been friends ever since.

Three years later, just before graduating the two of you, as well as some of your mutual friends from school went out to celebrate.

But after a few (well many) rounds of drinks and shots the club turned out to be too boring for your little group, that's why Amy decided it would be best to go back to someone's and spend the rest of the night there. "Maybe play some fun games", as she put it with a mischievous grin directed towards Ben.

The other three members of the group quickly approved, and that's how five (including yourself) completely hammered graduands ended up in the living room of your small flat.

"Now, what kind of games did you have in mind, Ames?", questioned Alfie, ever the responsible, whilst handing everyone a glass of water to at least try to cool you down a bit.

Gulping down her water way too quick, she paused for a second before listing a bunch of party games you'd normally play at a high school party, rather than a 'get together'.

"I mean, truth or dare doesn't sound half bad", added Charlie, "we could put in some twists like if you refuse to tell the truth you have to take a shot, and if you refuse a dare you have to remove an article of clothing?"

"That's brilliant! (y/n) you got any liquor?", called Amy, already halfway in the kitchen. "There should be Jägermeister in the cabinet above the sink!", you yelled back, your head falling against Ben's shoulder. The buzz from earlier slowly wearing off and exhaustion taking over.

Ben was looking down at you, adoration reflecting in his emerald eyes. If someone asked him, he would definitely deny it, but the blonde was madly in love with you since you started to hang out - well run lines together but it's essentially the same, right?

Curling his arm around your shoulders to pull you even just a little bit closer, you all waited for Amy to return with the herbal liquor your sister got you as a souvenir from her germany trip with her fiancé.

The sound of the bottle meeting the dark wood of your coffee table caused you to startle from your doze and you nearly jump into Ben's lap. "Holy - Amy be careful, otherwise you're gonna break the bottle", you groaned, burying your face in your friend's shoulder.

"Right, whatever. Who starts?", she grinned after a brief flash of annoyance crossed her face. Charlie volunteered to ask the first question, and chose Ben to be on the receiving end, who chose dare - since truth apparently is only for weaklings.

"Let's start off easy then, I dare you to let each of us draw something on you with a sharpie!", the brunette proposed, grabbing the pen off your notepad.

"I'm sure there will be worse, so let me be your canvas, dear ladies and gentleman!", Ben chuckled whilst shrugging off his jacket to free his muscular arms.

The drawings ended up only half as bad as he expected them to be, which is why he quickly moved on, asking Alfie.

The game continued for another four to five rounds each, leaving most of you at least shirtless, and the, used to be, full bottle of Jägermeister a good amount emptier.

To be honest if it weren't for the others you probably would've already sent them all home by now, the clock on your wall showing 3:16.

But not just because of that, but also because Amy's obnoxious flirting attempts on Ben were seriously getting ridiculous. That's why you suggested, it would be better to end your gathering and surprisingly most of them thought it was a good idea. Except for Amy, who over the past hour somehow took in your place at Ben's side.

You never really found out why exactly she was hanging out with you lot, since she wasn't even attending the same school. She was Charlie's flatmate that just ended up tagging along with the four of you about two years ago. That was also when she completely, hopelessly started to fall in love with Ben, and honestly who could blame her? But your probably unrequited feelings for your best friend were nobody's business but yours.

Ben quickly stood up, freeing himself from the blondes tight grip around his arm, “I’m going to help you clean this up later just gotta - real quick!” He called as he hurried down the hall towards the bathroom. Making sure to take his time, it might seem rude to wait out for the others to leave, but he really couldn’t deal with this anymore.

When he returned to the living room, Charlie, Alfie and Amy were gone, leaving you spread out on the couch, half asleep. “(y/n), love? You still with me?”

His question startled you, causing you to sit up straight, “Yes, still here.” Taking in the rest of the room Ben noticed that you already put away the bottle and cleaned up the mess you made.

It might seem stupidly cliché but right then, looking all dishevelled and tired, to him you looked ethereal. And it was all it took for him to make a move, finally.

“I have one last dare for you, (y/n)”, he told you confidently.

“And what would that be?”

Ben hesitated, the bravery he just gained, vanished as soon as you finished your question. The blonde just stood there for a second unable to pronounce a single syllable. Which is why you decided to get up, now standing just inches away from him.

His following words were rushed and quiet, just barely loud enough for you to hear, "I dare you to kiss me."

And that was all it took for you to close the gap between the two of you.

The kiss was the perfect balance between slow and tender, as well as filled to the brim with lust and need. His soft plump lips felt like heaven on earth connected to your own. It felt right in every way possible.

After your drunken kiss seven years ago, your friendship turned into a loving relationship, with a few minor hiccups along the way but you're still going strong.

Not too long the two of you got a beagle puppy to complete your little family, and Frankie quickly became the most important thing in both your lives.

Your little friend group from back then sadly didn't last but thanks to Ben landing a starring role in Bohemian Rhapsody his cast mates became your second family in no time.

Even after release of the movie and after press tour ‘the band’ never spent more than a few weeks without seeing each other.

And when coincidentally all of them, including Lucy and you, were in the same city there was no way you won't at least spend one night together.

Which is how you ended up in Joe's living room in New York, drinking wine and catching up on each other.

It took you by surprise when Gwilym, out of all people, suggested to play truth or dare, Lucy was immediately on board. Them being the only ones who knew about Ben's plan.

After very little convincing the rest of your little group agreed as well.

"Okay I'll start! Joe, truth or dare?", Lucy asked the first question the man to her left.

The game was nothing too spectacular, discovering some embarrassing teenage stories, here and there humiliating dares and constantly flowing alcohol.

When it was finally Ben's turn, he decided to ask you next. "Truth or dare, love? Choose wisely", he grinned cheekily.

Pretending to think for a moment you winked at the blonde next to you and answered his question with a confident, "dare!", causing the man to grin even wider. Ben's plan might actually work out.

"Okay, I need you to close your eyes for a second. No peeking!"

"Okay, okay! I promise", you giggled, putting both your hands in front of your closed eyes.

Only a few seconds later the whole group gasped, making you wonder what the actual fuck was happening right now. "Okay, (y/n), open up."

Slowly you put down your hands before opening your eyes, only to be met with the other ones standing in a line behind Ben, each one of them holding a single rose.

Your boyfriend of seven years sank to one knee right in front of you, a tiny velvet box held tightly in both his hands.

"(Y/n) (y/l/n), I dare you to marry me."

His deep, rich voice suddenly sounding so small, emerald eyes wide, waiting for a response.

Your hand that just moments prior covered your eyes, were now keeping you from sobbing.

Trying to collect yourself, you turned away from the others, quickly wiping away the tears rolling down your flushed cheeks.

Taking another deep breath you smiled at the still nervous young man kneeling on the carpet, "Yes, let's do this Benny!"

Your friends, who you really forgot were even there erupted in loud cheers as the blonde scrambled to his feet, eagerly pressing his lips to yours, grinning from ear to ear.

#ben hardy #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy fluff #ben hardy fanfic #ben hardy fic #ben hardy imagine #greta writes

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thewoodlandqueen · 4 years

Text

The Pevensies After Narnia

Summary: Returning home from Narnia was more difficult than any of the Pevensies could have ever imagined.

Words: 2,236

A/N: Based off this post of mine

“You wouldn’t believe us if I told you, sir.” Peter said looking up at the Professor with a small smile.

The Professor smiled in return and tossed the ball back to Peter. “Try me.”

So they did. The Pevensies told the Professor about all of their adventures in Narnia and in return the Professor told them of his. That first week back from Narnia was a joyous time. Sharing stories with the Professor, having hot running water again, eating their favorite foods, listening to the radio, and using lights. The modern pleasures they had since forgotten were discovered for what felt like the first time all over again.

It wasn’t until a week later that Peter uttered the words no one dared to speak. “What about our people?” Lucy’s face fell and Edmund went still.

“They’re well taken care of.” Susan said smoothing her skirt and looking over at her older brother. “Mr. Tumnus, Oreius, and the Beavers are more than capable.”

“We never got to say goodbye.” Lucy said, her big blue eyes glossing over with tears.

“We didn’t even want to leave.” Edmund said, his voice back to a squeaky high-pitched child’s voice.

“Come now.” Susan said looking around at her sad siblings. “We should all be happy to be back. Besides the fact that we had our adventure at all is what matters.” She nodded satisfied with her answer.

Then so began Susan’s bitter quest to forget Narnia and accept the fact that she was back home. Out of all of the Pevensie children, Susan had the least difficult time adjusting to life back in England. She often scolded Peter for wanting to go back and said that he was a bad influence for Edmund and Lucy. Logically, to Susan, burying herself in a good book could be as great an adventure as her time in Narnia.

Peter on the other hand disagreed. He wanted nothing more than to return back to Narnia as High King. It wasn’t because he missed the power and attention, but because he missed helping people. Ever since he was little Peter had plans of being a Doctor because he wanted to help others. As High King of Narnia his guidance and wisdom stretched out over oceans. Now that he was back home as Peter Pevensie from Finchley, the most good he could do was keep up his studies and watch over his younger siblings.

Edmund missed Narnia just as much as Peter did, but he kept it more to himself. Chess comforted him since he spent many hours in Narnia poured over a board with Oreius. His voice was no longer deep and steady, and his sharp jawline was lost and in its place a smooth pudgy chin. Being a child again reminded him of how awful he used to be. It was this childlike form that he fought with Peter, teased Lucy, and so selfishly sold out his family to the White Witch.

Lucy was the only Pevensie who dared to try and reenter the Wardrobe. Many times she pulled open the wooden door and stepped inside in hopes of feeling the hot summer breeze rustle through her hair. She spent a lot of time with the Professor telling stories and begging to hear more of his. Her hope of returning was what kept her in high spirits. Though there were times when she would burst out in a fit of anger. She was a warrior, a queen, and not being able to reach the top cupboard for a teacup was beyond frustrating. It was times like these when Peter would step in and without a word grabbed the teacup and handed it to her with a smile.

In fact the whole family dynamic changed. Peter and Edmund had never been closer. They spent lots of time together playing chess or in the library and never fought once. Lucy relied heavily on her older brothers for protection and support. When she wasn’t tall enough, not strong enough, or considered too little to have input they stepped in on her behalf. Susan pulled away from the other three and preferred to pick up her life where she left off and remember Narnia as beautiful memories. It wasn’t that Susan didn’t love Narnia; she just felt the best way to move forward was to focus on the present. Someone in the family had to.

What the Pevensie’s weren’t prepared for is how their life experience would affect their interactions with others. Mrs. Mcready in particular. What had been fifteen years for them had only been about fifteen minutes for her. For the life of that poor woman she couldn’t figure out the sudden change in the children and why their behavior was so strange all of a sudden.

The first noticeable incident was when she scolded them for breaking the Professors window. “You children need to learn some respect for this house. The stain glass is priceless and now, a gaping hole in it and a dismantled suit of armor. What do you have to say for yourselves?”

Edmund was the first to step forward, the diplomat in him ever prevalent. “We’re sorry, it was only an accident. I suppose I should avoid playing cricket for a while.”

Peter not wanting Edmund to share in the fault alone spoke next. “It was my fault really, I pitched that nasty curve ball.”

Mrs. Mcready didn’t know what to say. This was the last thing she expected to hear. “Well then, see that it doesn’t happen again.” She nodded before walking off awkwardly.

A few days later a dear friend of the Professor stopped by. “Children!” She called upstairs. “Come say hello to our guest.” It only took a moment for all the children to materialize and come to greet the mystery guest. “This is the Professor’s friend Ms. Plummer. Say hello now.”

The four Pevensies all bowed to the visitor before exchanging an awkward look. “Lovely to meet you.” Lucy nodded at the silver haired woman.

“My, what polite children the Professor is housing.” Mrs. Plummer smiled.

Mrs. Mcready didn’t say anything, she was too alarmed at Lucy’s adult pleasantries. Perhaps it was just a fluke, or she had misheard her. It wasn’t until dinner a few days later when Lucy asked for the salt that it was confirmed that Lucy was talking ever so strangely.

“Mrs. Mcready would you be so kind as to pass me the salt?” Lucy said taking a sip of her pomegranate juice.

“My dear child where on earth did you learn to talk like that?” Mrs. Mcready said grabbing the saltshaker and passing it to Susan who in turn set it in front of Lucy. Lucy hadn’t spoken like this when she first arrived.

Lucy looked up from her drink startled. “Uh…I don’t know…” She said looking to her siblings in a panic.

“Lucy and I have been practicing etiquette for school.” Susan spoke up. “We’ve never been to a private school before and we want to make a good impression.” Mrs. Mcready nodded but still wasn’t convinced.

Dinners actually became a great source of confusion for Mrs. Mcready. The Professor started having dinner with the Pevensie children which was odd in its own since he had earlier proclaimed that he never wanted to be disturbed by the children. Now dinner was lively and full of a bunch of rubbish.

“Tell me again where the Beavers lived.” The Professor said raising his glass to the children.

“Oh they had the cutest little dam!” Lucy exclaimed.

“You could see the White Witch’s palace from it.” Edmund added.

“I still can’t believe you had the misfortune of going head to head with her.” The Professor shook his head. “She was something else even in the short time I knew her.”

“You have no idea.” Peter shook his head.

“Children!” Mrs. Mcready scolded. “Don’t encourage him.” She said hinting that the Professor may have been going crazy, which she surly believed.

The rest of that summer was rather strange. The children all grew very fond of quite obscure activities and under the Professor’s orders, Mrs. Mcready was supposed to see to it that they had a chance to participate.

“Mrs. Mcready?” Edmund asked one day while she was organizing books in the library.

“Hmmm?” She responded glancing over her shoulder.

“Might I take a trip down to the stables?” Edmund asked fiddling with his fingers nervously.

“The stables?” Mrs. Mcready asked setting down the books she was sorting and placing her hands on her hips. “Whatever for?”

“I wanted to see the horses.” Edmund said shyly. There was no easy way to tell anyone that he desperately missed his animal companion, Phillip. “I like them.”

Mrs. Mcready didn’t know what to say. Normally uncharacteristic of Edmund but with how strange all the children had been acting, this wasn’t that strange. “Alright then off you go.”

Edmund’s face lit up and he put down the book he was reading before dashing out the door. He spent many hours in the stables in the coming weeks before school started. He’d smile, pet the horses, and speak softly to them as he dreamed of riding his own horse into a mighty battle.

Edmund wasn’t the only one missing his Narnian opportunities. Susan actually missed having her bow. So when she asked Mrs. Mcready if they had one for her to use along with a target, they materialized a day later. Susan found comfort in the feeling of her bow releasing the arrow and sinking in deeply to the target. It grounded her, and when she was missing Narnia a little extra, it was an easy activity to lose herself in.

When the school year started things became even more difficult for the Pevensies. Susan and Lucy were to be sent to a different school than Peter and Edmund. So in other words, the first time the family was to be separated since their fifteen years in Narnia. The other thing was that all of the children felt as though they didn’t need school. In Narnia the children continued their studies in Narnian history, combat, battle strategies, agriculture, and an endless list of other incredibly useful subjects. So school seemed silly. Lucy hated it the most.

When she was at school, she felt so small. There were girls taller than her and stronger than her who made it known. The gossip bored Lucy because she was years in wisdom beyond her age and whose hair looked funny didn’t matter to her. She had been in battle, dined with Lords, made laws, and ruled an entire kingdom. The schoolyard was below Lucy and despite her protests, she was forced to be a child again even though she had known adulthood.

Susan didn’t struggle with this as much. She felt almost the same as before she went to Narnia. Susan had always been more mature for her age. She had to be. The war forced both her and Peter to grow up to take care of their younger siblings. At school she buried herself int books and her studies. To Susan, this was home and if she wanted to succeed, she needed to accept that.

Edmund, like Susan, accepted the fact that he was a kid again but, like Peter he missed Narnia dearly. He missed his horse. He missed his deep commanding voice settling disputes. He missed his life. Like the rest of his siblings he excelled in his studies and impressed all of his teachers. Somehow, just like Peter had taken care of Edmund, Edmund ended up taking care of Peter. The eldest Pevensie found himself in all sorts of disputes and comprisable situations.

Peter took it the hardest. He was High King. He felt like he abandoned his people and lost himself. This only got worse the longer the schoolyear went on. The first noticeable correction that needed to be made was Peter’s signature. After being handed an academic conduct contract to be signed Peter absent-mindedly began signing High King Peter. He had to stop himself short and in frustration tore the paper to shreds before asking for a new one. There would be nights when he would stand in front of the mirror and wonder who he had become. He missed his broad shoulders and sharp jawline. He grew angry, irritable, and frustrated. He missed his life.

All of the Pevensie children had been deeply changed by their time in Narnia.

By the time the school year was over and they returned back to the Professor for summer, something dark had taken root in all of them. Lucy regressed back to the little girl she had been before she had discovered Narnia. Edmund’s sass slowly crept back into his every conversation. Susan never spoke of Narnia but to scold her siblings for wishing their life away. Then there was Peter who was no longer a lost king, but a troubled teenage boy who got into fights and was labeled disobedient. The school year had worn them down and after being treated like a child again, that is what they all became.

That is until that faithful day at the train station next school year something magical happened. Then every happy feeling the Pevensies had locked away came flooding back and the past year of torture was left behind on the beach of Cair Paravel. They were home again.

#narnia fanfiction #narnia #the chronicles of narnia #the chronicles of narnia fanfiction #peter pevensie #susan pevensie #edmund pevensie #the chronicles of narnia fan fiction #narnia fanfic #lucy pevensie #narnia fan fiction

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emilialuciasantos · 3 years

Text

Is This a Date? (Part 1) || Emilia x Lola

Where: Santa Monica, CA

When: February 25, 2021

Featuring: Lola Siciliani (dialogue provided by Frenchie @lola-siciliani), Blaine Valentine, Ace Wong

Triggers: Mention of hospitalization, mental health (anxiety, body image issues), mention of abortion, mention of bullying

Emilia pulled up to Lola's apartment and texted her that she was outside. She needed to see Lola after the day she had in the ICU. As she waited, she answered a few OnlyFans DMs. People really wanted her attention tonight. She had no idea why though. It was only Thursday. She usually only posted new content on the weekends. The last message she had to send was to Lollypop12, a kind mutual who she had been chatting with a lot. Lollypop12 reminded her of Lola so much, but of course she wouldn't ask Lola if she had an account. The last thing Emilia wanted to do was make her uncomfortable. Before she could finish writing the message, she spotted Lola walking up to the car.

Lola was immersed into her book when she received a text message. For a moment, she had quickly glanced, thinking it was AJ, but when it buzzed again, her eyes lit up seeing that it was Emilia. She went to double check to see if she received any word from lucylovexox, but she was probably busy...there was something that seemed familiar about her, but she was just glad that she had made a friend. Slamming her book shut, she ran to her mirror to make sure her hair wasn't too out of place and scurried out the door to meet up with Emilia. She might've nearly tripped down the stairs on her way out, but luckily, it didn't appear like Emilia noticed as she waved at her approaching the car. "Hey!"

Emilia unlocked the door for her, asking, "Hey! How's your day going?" She had a rough day, but seeing Lola made her day almost instantly better. "I just gotta answer this text real quick, then we can go get dinner." The text was actually the OnlyFans DM she was writing, but she wasn't going to admit that out loud. Word spread fast in their city, and her career would be ruined before it even began. She typed out "Goddamn, you are killing it! 🥵🥵🥵" and hit send before shoving her phone into her jacket pocket.

Lola hopped into the car and grinned, "Besides nearly falling asleep in chemistry class, it's going pretty damn great, what about you?" She asked curiously. Just like that, Lola's energy practically zapped her back to life and she wasn't feeling so sluggish anymore. "Oh, no worries, take your time," Lola pointed out with a smile as she nodded her head along to the radio, not saying anything to make sure Emilia was focused on the text. That was until her phone made the ding sound and she went to check to see who it was. AJ typically had the worst timing until she saw none other than lucylovexox and her heart dropped. There was no way.

“Better now. I was put in the ICU today for clinicals... it was rough.” The ICU was never a pleasant place to be. It didn’t help that she knew one of her patients. She didn’t know him well, but he was related to Blaine and had done her and her mother’s tattoos. She was ready to start the car, but then heard the ding. She froze like a deer in headlights. This had to be a coincidence.

“That, does not sound fun. I’m so sorry,” Lola frowned. “I’ll buy you an appetizer for your troubles tonight?” She offered with a smile. She couldn’t imagine how hard it was for Emilia between navigating the ICU for clinicals and still managing to make her way to see her...but Lola was grateful and she’d try to repay her as best as she could. Of course right now she wanted to quickly rebound and say, “Oh it’s probably my brother,” She chuckled to lighten the mood. As she checked her phone she could feel the heat rising to her cheeks and her ears as she responded, “That one was specifically for you 🥰🥰🥰” And all she could do now was hold her breath, and hope, the phone next to her wasn’t going to buzz.

“Aww, you’re too sweet. You don’t have to do that though.” She couldn’t get over how nice Lola was to her. Sure, her friends were nice to her, but Lola went above and beyond compared to most of them. She started up the car then felt her phone vibrate. One buzz, followed by a double buzz. One of those was definitely a text from Blaine, who had been bothering her all day about his maternal family. The other, she wasn’t sure about, but was scared to find out. She bit the bullet and looked. A text and an OnlyFans notification. She had to turn off notifications for OF one of these days. “Sorry, Blaine’s been texting me all day about family stuff.” That wasn’t a lie, but not the whole truth either. “I’ll answer him back later. You can change the station or put your own music on the aux if you want.”

“Yup, I do. It’s law. Bad days require amazing appetizers,” Lola grinned brightly at Emilia. It was at that moment she could hear her siblings in her head saying ‘welcome to the club’ and ‘it’s about goddamn time’ about her feeling her own feelings again. There was just something about Emilia that just made everything feel okay again. However, the buzz brought her mind back down to earth and that, got her heart racing, but then, it was followed by another buzz. Okay, it wasn’t, Emilia. Even though lucylovexox seemed so familiar and comfortable to talk to, there was no way it was Emilia. “Oh, is everything okay?” She asked curiously. Even though she and Blaine had a stand-off last time, she knew Emilia cared about her step-brother, and if she was worried, Lola would be worried too. “Don’t worry about it,” she chuckled. “I love this song actually. It’s been stuck in my head since I first heard it, actually.”

“Oh is it now?” she asked, a small smirk forming on her face. However, thinking about her day and the possibility of her alter ego being discovered brought her back to reality. She sighed before answering, “Don’t go spreading this around, but one of Blaine’s maternal cousins went into the hospital last night. Overdose. He’s in the ICU, and since I happened to be in the ICU today, it became my job to update them all on his condition on top of, you know, working. And now Blaine’s just complaining about how his relatives are irritating him.” With the car still in park, she opened up her phone to look at the notifications. She sent Blaine a quick “you’ll be aight” text, then went back to the DMs. Lollypop12, of course, came up first, followed by a man called GregT143. Greg was obsessed with her, or rather, with Lucy. She didn’t have the mental energy to answer either though, so she exited the app, put her phone in the cup holder, and started to drive.

"It is, I said so," She wiggled her eyebrows at the green-eyed girl. Lola had to push the thought from her head that Emilia was potentially lucylovexox--mostly because they became pretty acquainted with each other and she'd probably wouldn't know how to handle herself without being a flustered mess. At Emilia's confession, she did something she hardly ever did with people, she put a careful reassuring hand on Emilia's shoulder. "Don't worry, it'll be between us. I'm sorry you have to deal with all of that, though. I can't even imagine how much of a headache that must be. I'm here for you though. If you want to like...vent and stuff," She offered with a lop-sided smile. Once she realized what she did she carefully inched her hand away back to her lap and took a breath. "So, um, this is...completely random, but earlier today my Nonna gave me a play by play of my old neighbors back home fighting. They fight every Thursday over a different topic each and every time and this week, they were screaming in the street about laundry."

Why was Lola so nice? Why did her hand on her shoulder make her heart flutter? Why did someone as cool and confident as Lola even give her the time of day? All of these thoughts, the thumping beat of Rihanna’s “Where Have You Been,” and the fact that her phone buzzed five times in a row (all messages from Greg, of course) made it hard for Emilia to focus on the road. As Lola recalled the story her Nonna told her, Emilia abruptly pulled over and put the car in park. After turning the volume on the radio down to zero, she sat in silence for a moment, forehead pressed against the steering wheel, before apologizing. “I’m sorry... sorry... I just, I got overwhelmed. Sorry.” She felt like she was ruining the evening before it even began.

As Lola wrapped up the story with a, "Apparently you can't put orange with white because everything turns peach--" She kept hearing the buzzes coming from the cup holder and as much as she tried to not look, her eyes quickly glanced and saw the OF notifications and her heart fell straight down into her stomach as her eyes quickly went back to Emilia's as the car was suddenly pulled over. "Hey, hey," Lola unbuckled her seatbelt to scoot closer to Emilia, her hand lightly going over to her head, to turn the green eyed girl towards her. "Em, it's okay. I'm here."

“There’s too... much... happening!” she yelled, bursting into tears. Emilia was overwhelmed. She didn’t know why this was all hitting her now, but it was, and it was hitting her like a semi truck. She yanked her seatbelt off and buried her face into Lola’s shoulder. The fact that she was being so soft and comforting only made Emilia bawl harder. Then her phone buzzed again. This time it was a double buzz, a text message. The text was from Blaine and it said, “I know. I’m sorry everyone was bothering you. Thank you for your help today. Babciu and Kieran really appreciated it.” She didn’t want to read any of her messages at the moment, so she looked up to the blue-eyed girl and asked, “Could you please put my phone on airplane mode? The passcode is 0506.” 0506. May 6th, her mother’s birthday.

If there was one thing that Lola couldn't handle, it was emotion, but somehow, somewhere in the back of her head, she knew exactly what to do as she pulled Emilia into a tight hug, and rubbed her back in a soothing circle. "Just breathe, Emilia," She whispered softly. She couldn't imagine what was going through Emilia's head, being completely overwhelmed and overloaded, like the weight of the world was on her shoulders. All Lola could do was hold her tight to keep her together, to let her know she was here to hold her up. At Emilia's request, she nodded silently and typed in the passcode, ignoring all the texts and notifications as the phone was put into airplane mode. She set the phone back into the cup holder, and carefully went to cup Emilia's face, her thumbs wiping her tears. "Let's just take a moment for you to be in silence, that way you're not surrounded by a major sensory overload, okay?" She said, her voice was barely above a whisper. "I got you. I'm not going anywhere. Just take a moment."

A wave of relief washed over her once her phone was turned off. No more insane buzzing, no more horny incels or annoying brothers. It was just Emilia, Lola, and the low rumble of Emilia’s car engine. “Thanks... and sorry again. Can you repeat what you said before about your Nonna and the laundry? I didn’t fully understand you.”

Seeing Emilia pull herself back together was strength, in Lola's opinion. She was definitely having a day and she'd do her best to make it just a little better, if all else failed. "No need to apologize, I get it," She reassured the other brunette with a reassuring grin. "Oh, um," She chuckled awkwardly. "My Nonna likes to give me a play by play on my neighbors arguing every week and this week it was about laundry, and why you shouldn't put anything orange into a pile of whites."

Emilia sniffled, using her jacket sleeve to wipe her eyes. “Still. You have your own stuff to worry about. You don’t need my stuff too.” She often felt bad about bothering people with her emotional problems, even when she was confiding in someone she wholeheartedly trusted. She didn’t want to come off as whiny or annoying. “Huh, no orange and white. I’ve never had an issue with mixing whites and colors, but I’ll try to keep that in mind.”

"Sometimes we can't handle everything on our own, Em," Lola pointed out. "It's okay to lean on someone you can trust. I don't mind at all," She reassured her with a grin. All she wanted to do was pull Emilia into a hug again, but she definitely didn't want to go overboard...especially because she enjoyed hugging her. "Neither have I," She laughed lightly. "Honestly, I think they just have detergent that makes their clothes bleed, but I didn't tell Nonna that because those neighbors were like a telenovela just unraveling every week."

“Thanks again,” she said softly, leaning her head back on Lola’s shoulder. She wanted, no needed, another hug. It made her feel safe. Lola made her feel safe, amongst other things. “Yeah, it does sound like they have bad detergent. If you want to hear about a real-life telenovela, you should hear about my Uncle Luis’ love life.”

"Any time," Lola grinned. When Emilia's head went to Lola's shoulder, she couldn't resist wrapping her arms around her once more, just completely taking in the moment. She wanted to keep her safe, as much as she hated admitting to herself that she felt strongly for Emilia. "They really do. I'm gonna guess it's like AJAX or something?" She chuckled. "Oooh, you gotta tell me. How bad as it," She asked curiously. Then, she did something she didn't think she'd ever do: she carefully brushed a random piece of hair behind Emilia's ear.

Emilia closed her eyes, sighing softly. She hadn’t fully calmed down yet, but she was starting to. “Oh, it’s really bad. I should probably start by saying that he’s awful and no one in the family likes him. So he dated this woman when I was about ten or eleven, cheated on her with her twin sister, and got both of them pregnant.” She felt her cheeks blush when Lola touched her hair. She hated how much of a blusher she was, especially around her. She also hated how much she wanted to make out.

Lola hoped that Emilia was starting to feel better and was letting the weight lift off her shoulders, even if it was for a bit. "We all have a relative like that in our family, right?" She smirked until her eyes widened at the story. Now that, was pretty damn messy. "Wow...um...huh," She chuckled, shaking her head. "Okay, I just have one question: did they wind up having twins on their own too or...I'm just mildly curious on the outcome of all that, don't mind me," She waved off casually. She noticed Emilia's blush right off the bat. Frankly, it reminded her of the first day she met, except this time...she was fighting the urge of not instantly moving in to kiss her.

“Oh, well, one didn’t end up having any babies, and the other gave hers up for adoption. Just a single birth. I hope that kid’s doing alright.” She didn’t have any more information on that situation, but she did know that Luis had at least four other kids he wasn’t paying child support for. After finishing her story, she sat up and put her seatbelt back on. Her brain was still rebooting from the panic attack, but if she didn’t start driving now, she feared she might do something she’d regret. “Okay, I think I’m okay to drive now. You mind if I keep the radio off though?”

"Woo...I don't blame either of their decisions, honestly. I can't imagine how heartbreaking and rough that must've been. Definitely telenovela status," Lola nodded with a bewildered look for a moment. When Emilia sat back up, Lola went to grab her seatbelt to put it back on again. At least now things were back to normal...well, her mind was still reeling from all that had happened and the fact she had just done the thing and had to restrain herself. "Awesome! I'm ready!" She grinned and then followed up with, "Not at all, we can talk or drive in silence, whichever's more comfortable for you."

“Yeah, that was a particularly bad Luis story. I probably shouldn’t have known about that as a child, but I did.” It was because she and her mom always lived in tiny apartments and Emilia often eavesdropped on telephone conversations between her mom and Abuela. “I’m okay with talking.” As she drove, she didn’t do much of the talking. She preferred listening to what Lola had to say.

"You know I feel like when we have women in our family that love spilling tea, we're bound to know the wrong thing at a young age, you know?" Lola chuckled. "I definitely get it. The things my mom and Nonna, and Aunt Connie would talk about would be wild," She added on with a silly grin. "Okay, we can do that," She nodded. "Well, if you want to talk about family drama, well the current family drama is that my older sister hates my brother's girlfriend because she stands in solidarity with her best friend...who slept with my brother's girlfriend's ex-boyfriend...who also just so happens to be my brother's best friend."

“No one really told me stuff, I was just a nosy kid,” she explained, chuckling. “But now that I’m an adult, I get included in the conversation. Abuela looooves talking shit over the phone.” Emilia’s eyes nearly bulged out of her head when Lola talked about her family drama, not only because of how obscure this story was, but also because she remembered this story. “Shit, I think I heard about that on Gossip God!”

”That’s the best part. The eavesdropping. Did you ever hold the cup to your ear while your mom was in the other room??” She asked curiously. “YES!!!! Isn’t it great. Especially cause they think you won’t say anything. You become the new bearer of secrets,” She giggled. At Emilia’s expression, Lola laughed and nodded. “Because it was broadcasted on Gossip God. My brother and my sister’s best friend were wrapped up in alll of that. I mean, as much as Ivy wants me to hate Lydia, I’m curious about her and personally I just want to see her point of view and then determine from there. My mom agrees.”

"I never had to. Thin walls plus loud mom equaled perfect eavesdropping opportunities. She always gets mad at me when I tell her that she's loud, but then will yell at me to come downstairs for dinner at a volume loud enough to be heard down the block." She laughed at her own joke. Paula, whether she admitted or not, was a loud-mouth. "I'm a pretty good bearer of secrets, if I do say so myself. Except I do tell my mom most things. Like, I'd say about 90% of stuff." Of course she had her own secrets that she kept from her mom, but not too many. Just those involving sex work. "Honestly, I think you should get to know her on your own. Maybe it's one big misunderstanding. You won't know unless you do your own investigation. It reminds me of a law quote Blaine told me. 'There are three sides to every story: the plaintiff's side, the defendant's side, and the truth.'"

Lola giggled at Emilia's description of her mom. In fact, she could relate. Elena Siciliani was definitely one of those moms. "Ugh, lucky you...although I can relate with the loud-mouthed mom, until it came down to sharing gossip. I think our moms might get along honestly. Loud moms always flock together and you can hear them coming miles away," She shook her head as she explained through laughter. "That makes two of us then, huh? Although, let's be real, sometimes the secrets are just burning you have no choice but to tell your mom, y'know? Then they totally understand." It was often something that Lola did, often, although sometimes if it was too wild, she'd have to tell Ivy. "I think so too," She nodded in agreement and then tilted her head at Blaine's law quote. "That's...actually really insightful. I'll definitely have to keep that quote in my pocket. Thanks for that, Em."

“You think so?” Emilia thought her mom needed more mom friends. After Emilia fell out with her childhood best friend, Paula lost a lot of her mom friends. While she got along with Ace’s mom, they came from two totally different worlds and didn’t have a lot in common. “Oh yeah, totally. We bicker sometimes, but at the end of the day, she’s my best friend.” If there was one person Emilia could rely on no matter what, it was her mother. She was starting to get to that level of trust with her step family, but wasn’t quite there yet. “Oh no problem,” she said as she pulled into the restaurant’s parking lot.

"Definitely! My mom's loud and friendly to anyone she meets. Anyone. It's a pain because she always gets stopped at supermarkets because she's so extroverted and I'll be like 'ma...we gotta go'. Every time," She reassured Emilia. Hopefully their moms could be friends somewhere down the road...especially with how much Lola's been rattling her head off to the woman back home. "I love that for you both," She said with a bright smile. Lola was blessed to have not just her mother, but her older siblings too. Throughout the bickering, the fighting, she had them. So, she could relate to just Emilia and her mom, cause sometimes, that's all you ever needed. "So," She clapped her hands quietly, but excitedly, "I am so hype to try out this spot."

“That happens to my step-dad too. He just knows everyone!” Her mom was extroverted, but not as much as George. Emilia didn’t mind as much, but Blaine absolutely hated it. It’s why Emilia helped out with groceries more than he did. “Well I’d love to meet your mom one of these days, and I’m sure my mom would too.” She wondered how much Lola’s mom knew about her. Paula had heard quite a bit about Lola, and Gossip God filled in the rest of the blanks for her. She hated how accurate that blog was. She pulled into a spot, put the car in park, and turned the car off. “My personal favorite are the chicken tacos. I hear the fish tacos are good too, but I’ve never had them. I can try them, but only once.”

"Isn't it so daunting?! Like they get stopped literally everywhere!" Lola laughed at the thought of it. Often times, she'd joke that her mom was like the mayor or the president. Just always shaking hands and having very long conversations. "Definitely! I think she's coming down for March Madness or spring break, I gotta double check with her first, but I'll definitely let you know when he's in town," She reassured her with a smile. "Oooh, chicken tacos sound amazing right now. Especially with the green salsa," She sighed at the mention of the fish taco, she thought about it for a second. I can try them, but only once. "Wait a sec," She shook her head with a chuckle. "Are you allergic to fish?"

“Right? Sometimes I feel like my mom married the freaking Governor!” She laughed about it, but George could go into politics if he wanted to, and he’d probably be very good at it. Emilia’s eyes widened as she realized that she never told Lola about her allergy. “Crustacean shellfish,” she elaborated. “I never really had shellfish growing up because we couldn’t afford it. I tried shrimp and stuff a few times, but I didn’t realize I was having an allergic reaction and just thought it tasted bad. I didn’t actually know I was allergic until I graduated high school and tried lobster for the first time at my high school graduation dinner.” Worst dinner party ever.

"Exactly! It's like at this point, just run for office! Between your step-dad and my mom, they'd win the presidency/vice presidency for sure," Lola laughed at the thought of it for a moment. "Oh...that sounds incredibly terrifying and horrible," She shook her head in shock. "Rest assured, I'm not really a big fan of shellfish, like at all, my family doesn't really eat it cause ma's allergic, so, you won't die at Sunday dinner," She teased, and realized what she just implied...and then frankly she didn't care because she liked Emilia. "And yes, you're invited to Sunday dinner."

“Now that would be a sight to see.” Emilia wasn’t sure if she would ever want George to run for office, as he was, unfortunately, a libertarian. “Yeah, not fun times, which is why I generally avoid mixed seafood platters and fried foods at restaurants. Did you know that restaurants tend to fry everything in the same oil?” She didn’t know that until she was an adult. “I mean, if you did want to, I wouldn’t stop you, so long as you don’t kiss me on the mouth after.” Emilia realized after she spoke what she was implying, and once again, her face was red. “Uh... anyways, let’s go eat!”

"It really would huh?" Lola grinned, scrunching her nose up cutely at Emilia. "I don't blame you at all, that sounds terrify--wait what?" Her eyes widened in shock. This was the first time she had ever heard about food being fried in the same oil. "I--wow--that's--huh," She was pretty much speechless for a moment about the food until her ears perked up at Emilia's next statement. "Let's be real, if I were to kiss you on the mouth, I definitely wouldn't eat fried food or seafood. Maybe something sweet like, candy or fruit," She pointed out with a smirk. She was definitely being blunt now. "I mean, um, yeah, definitely, let's go!" She nodded in agreement, biting her bottom lip nervously, hoping to the high heavens that she didn't blow it.

“Mhm.” Emilia smiled at Lola’s cute little scrunched-nose expression. She wanted to take a picture and keep it forever, but didn’t do that because she knew that would be a weird thing to do. “Yeah. When you have a lot of food to make, it’s just easier to fry everything together. Not all places do it, but a lot of big places do, like diners and chain restaurants.” Emilia’s heart skipped a beat when Lola talked about kissing her. And biting her lip after? Was Lola trying to kill her? Her heart was pushing her to make a move before it was too late, so she did. She leaned forward and pressed her lips against the other girl’s. As soon as she did, however, her brain screamed at her to stop. ‘What the hell are you doing? Why would you do that? She doesn’t actually like you. Stop now! STOP NOW!!’ She listened to her brain, retreated, and apologized. “I-I’m sorry... I-I don’t know what came over me...”

Lola couldn't help but smile at Emilia's smile. She really did have the prettiest smile, and sure, it might make her a simp but she would go through hell and high water to make sure that girl smiled. God, she was hopeless. "That sounds so gross. That cross contamination sounds so deadly I just...ew. I can't," She made a sour face and shook her head for a moment. When her gaze met Emilia's, she could feel her own blush coming on starting from her cheeks and ending at her ears. At this point she just wanted to hide her face within her shirt, maybe behind her jean jacket if she could, but, suddenly, Emilia's lips were on her lips, and they were so soft but before she could even reciprocate it back, the other girl pulled back. And Lola, was bewildered. "No don't!" She quickly blurted out. "I um," She put her hand to her own lips and smiled a little, "Can we...do that again?"

Oh God, she actually did that. The brunette’s brain was moving a hundred miles per second. ‘That was a terrible idea. She doesn’t realize how much of a broken mess you are. No one wants to be with a broken mess.’ Once more, Emilia felt the need to apologize. “Sorry. It’s just... the things you were saying and way you were looking at me made me think maybe— wait did you just ask if we could do that again?”

Lola’s mind was running a mile a minute. Mostly it was an internal scream that Emilia had just kissed her. One part of her told her no, we’re not going back down this route again! but the other part of her...the other part of her was much louder and much softer. That part of her would never get tired of kissing Emilia. Her brow furrowed at Emilia’s apology, her assumptions were right, Lola was indeed flirting with the beautiful green eyed girl. “You don’t need to apologize,” She giggled softly. “And yeah, I did. I liked it,” she bit her lip nervously and then said, “I’ve been flirting this whole time, because I like the way your cheeks get all rosy and your smile gets all bashful. I think you’re really pretty—no—drop-dead gorgeous. And I wouldn’t mind kissing you all the time.”

You don't need to apologize. She repeated that to herself in her brain. You don't need to apologize. She heard it in her therapist's voice. Her therapist was constantly telling her that she didn't need to apologize to everyone for everything, that the feelings she felt were normal and valid. Maybe her therapist had a point. Hearing Lola say that she enjoyed the kiss and that she had been flirting with her brought a smile to Emilia's face, but part of her still didn't believe Lola. Emilia's mind was constantly in flux between 'you're awful and ugly and nobody will love you' and 'you're hot shit, but people will only ever love you for your body.' Right now she was stuck on the former. "Are you sure?" she asked, softly.

Lola could tell the situation was intensifying between them two, so carefully, she reached out to put a hand on Emilia's cheek to reassure her. She had to admit, she was a sucker for her, despite her own past heartache, but she had a glimmer of hope. Maybe she wouldn't be hidden this time, maybe she wouldn't have to hold her hand under the table. Maybe, just maybe, she could be out in the open with Emilia. She hoped so, at least. Carefully she leaned in closer and nodded, "I'm more than sure," She smiled. "I like you, Emilia."

She leaned into Lola’s touch, melting like a puddle in her hand. Why someone as cool as Lola liked someone like Emilia was beyond her comprehension. But being close to her like this felt nice, and she wanted to get even closer, physically and emotionally. “I like you too... So does that make this a date?”

It was official, Lola was indeed a simp and her siblings would give her the utmost shit about it...and she didn’t care. Emilia was the sweetest person she had come across, someone who could pull a smile from her constant rbf, she was someone who reminded her what it was like to feel a heartbeat. Her smile grew at Emilia’s confession and all she wanted to do was kiss her right then and there, but she decided to just lean in, and let her nose touch the other girl’s as she whispered, “It can be, if you want it to.”

“In that case, it’s a date... We should probably get this food before all the seats fill up.” As much as she wanted to stay here and enjoy this moment, she was starving. “Or I guess we could get it to go, if worse comes to worst.” As she sat up, she caught a glimpse of herself in the rear view mirror and realized how disheveled she looked. “Oh God, I hope you weren’t going to really let me go into the restaurant looking like this,” she said, reaching back to grab her purse. She had cried about half of her makeup off while panicking and wasn’t going to go out in public without fixing it. “Could you go in and grab us a table?”

“Great! It’s a date!” Lola echoed with a grin. “And um yeah because the last thing I had today was left over lasagna...for lunch,” she emphasized with a groan. She was definitely starving. “Let’s see if there are tables first and then if push comes to shove then we can get it to go and eat it at my place?” She offered with a smile. At Emilia’s comment, Lola shook her head with a chuckle, “Of course not, I would’ve definitely stopped you, but, I still think you look pretty,” She pointed out with a more bashful smile. At the request, she nodded and gave Emilia a quick kiss on the cheek before she went to unbuckle her seatbelt and hopped out the car. She was practically skipping with excitement as she made her way inside.

Once Lola was out of the car, Emilia screamed in excitement. She took her phone off of airplane mode and called Ace to let him know about the good news. She put him on speaker and told him everything that had happened in the car as she reapplied her eye makeup. She was over the moon, and Ace was just as excited for her. Once she looked presentable, she ended the call and entered the restaurant.

Lola was on cloud 9 as she made her way inside giddily asking for a table. She had gushed to the hostess about having her first date tonight with a pretty girl in which, suddenly she was being seated at her table. She thanked the woman and took a seat, quickly texting AJ and Ivy, “Guess I’m joining the club,” and then waited for Emilia, her heart, was officially racing.

Emilia stared at her phone for a moment before entering the restaurant. She knew she had messages to answer, but she didn’t feel like doing it. It dawned on her that Lola most likely saw at least one OnlyFans notification when she turned her phone off for her earlier, and that she had quite a bit of explaining to do. She would cross that bridge later though, when they weren’t in public. She sent Blaine a quick text, stating “no prob, ttyl” before going on airplane mode once more. She wanted to give Lola all of her attention. The hostess graciously showed her to the table where Lola was seated.

Lola could feel the adrenaline rushing through her and it almost felt like electricity in her veins, in the best way possible, of course. When she got a few texts back, mostly from AJ, because she knew Ivy was working, she quickly shot back texts doing her best to explain in few words before responding “I’ll call you later”, when she noticed Emilia approaching and quickly pocketed her phone. Gosh, she’s so pretty... she thought to herself quietly and then responded, “Well, long time no see, stranger,” She teased.

Emilia was excited, but also incredibly nervous. Why did she have to say the date thing? Now the stakes felt so much higher. There was a big chance that she would severely screw things up. But maybe something really good could come out of this. “I’m sorry, who are you?” she asked, clearly joking.

As much as she felt that the whole date thing would mean a little more pressure, Lola reminded herself to make it as enjoyable as possible, even if it was awkward. "Wooow, you wound me, Emilia!" She teased, putting a hand over her own heart in a dramatic fashion. "So, I have a proposition for you, that way it takes a little bit of weight of your shoulders."

She giggled at Lola’s response to her joke. “And the Oscar goes to Lola Siciliani!” She hung her jacket up on the back of the chair and took a seat, immediately reaching for the bowl of tortilla chips on the table. She was thankful for free restaurant chips. She raised a brow when Lola spoke. “A proposition? What kind of proposition are you talking about?”

“I’d like to give a big middle finger to the academy and a shout out to this gorgeous gal back home...” Lola teased with a giggle. She went to try to steal a chip from Emilia as she nodded at the other girl’s question. “Okay, so, I know this is the first date, but, what if we just say it’s a casual first date, so that way it kinda takes the edge off y’know? Like—we don’t have to sit and try to impress each other because we’re just here to have a good time, no matter what the outcome.”

"Damn, what'd the Academy do to you?" she asked, laughing. "When you say back home, do you mean here or is there someone in Chicago I should know about?" Emilia was sure there were plenty of gorgeous girls in Chicago, maybe some that Lola had dated. Now that she was thinking about it, she realized that she really didn't know anything about Lola's dating history. That would be a question for later. "I like the idea of a casual first date... I think I'd like to do the 'getting to know you' part of a date though, because there's still a bunch of little things I don't know about you yet, and I'd like to."

"Oh you know, snub all my favorite actors," Lola laughed along with her and then snorted at Emilia's remark. "Well, I'm starting to consider Santa Monica as a second home and the only pretty girl I know is sitting right across from me," She added, batting her eyelashes cutely at the other girl. "Then back home I got my ma, Nonna, and Aunt Connie," She added with a grin. She realized there'd be more that the two of them would talk about between growing up in their hometowns to the infamous dating history. She was ready--sort of. "Awesome! And yeah, we can do that, get to know the deep dark secrets and all," She teased. "I could take the plunge and start or, would you like to have the floor first?" She asked curiously, resting her chin on the palm of her hand.

There it was again. She felt her face warming up. She hadn't even been in this restaurant for two minutes, yet Lola was already making her flustered. Getting complimented by pretty girls was truly her Kryptonite. "Oh hush. I can't be the only pretty girl you've met. There are literal models who live here!" Emilia hadn't met any personally, but she knew they were out there. Her heart dropped to her stomach at the mention of deep dark secrets. Emilia would have to talk about her 'side hustle' eventually. She told herself this only moments ago, but she still wasn't ready. What if Lola judged Emilia for what she did? Or worse, what if she told other people? "Umm... were you in any clubs or sports teams in high school?" That was an easy enough question.

"Pink's definitely your color," Lola began teasingly. "Just look at how cute you look when you get all flustered," She said, wiggling her eyebrows at Emilia with a big grin. "Okay, so? That doesn't make you any less prettier than any of the models here. You're gorgeous and if you weren't sitting across from me I'd probably squish your face--and that's rare," She admitted aloud. She was so going to kick herself for that comment. "I played soccer and was in the science club," She admitted with a grin. "What about you?"

“Stooooop,” she whined, hiding her face behind her hands. “It might be one of my favorite colors, but not on my face.” She took a few deep breaths, trying not to get overwhelmed. Then it hit her. She thought to herself, don’t think like Emilia, think like Lucy. “That’s too kind of you. But you could squish my face if you really wanted to, like...” She reached across the table and squeezed one of Lola’s cheeks. “Like that.” She smirked at the other girl. “I did choir all throughout high school and I was in stage crew for a few of the school plays. Oh, and GSA. Ace convinced me to start going to that in junior year.”

Lola giggled at Emilia whining and hiding behind her hands. She had a feeling she could get used to moments like these, except she hated there was a table between them because she’d be all over, kissing those cute flustered cheeks. “Well, I think it’s so cute,” She smiled scrunching her nose up at her. Then, the tables were turned when Emilia went to squish Lola’s cheek and she laughed feeling her own face slowly begin to turn pink. “Well...” She cleared her throat, hiding her own face for a moment and suppressing a fit of giggles. “You’re on!” She said as she reached over with both hands to squish Lola’s cheeks and then said, “Hey, why don’t we switch it up and you can sit next to me instead or I could go and slide over next to you?” She offered. “Really?” Her eyes widened in awe at the other girl’s clubs. “Do you still sing? What plays did you get to do? And hey! Wait, Ace? Museum guy Ace?—sorry that was a lot of questions, don’t mind me I got excited.”

A wide smile formed on Emilia's face once she wasn't the only one blushing. "Well well, how the tables have turned," she teased. "You see, I would move over, but then you would be squishing my cheeks all night long." She paused, trying to think of the answers to all of her questions. "It's okay. So, one, I sing for fun when I'm by myself in my room and in the car, but that's really it. Two, I helped with set design and stage makeup for Hairspray and Little Shop of Horrors. Three, probably, yeah. He basically lives at Bergamot when he's not at work." She took her phone out of her pocket and pulled up her photos, handing it over to show Lola a recent selfie of her and Ace. "That's him. We've been best friends since he moved here in freshman year of high school."

"This is a cruel fate," Lola said in between laughs as she tried using her hands to cover up her cheek. "Is that such a crime to give you some affection?" She asked, batting her eyelashes cutely at Emilia with the most innocent of smiles. "Let me guess, you're one of those shy singers that sound insanely good, right?" She asked with genuine curiosity. "Wow, I gotta say, I'm pretty impressed," Lola grinned. At the picture her eyes widened. "Holy shit, what a small world! I actually ran into him at the museum actually. We were talking about Botticelli's Venus painting and the alphabet mafia."

"Yes, yes it is," she joked back. "I, uh, no. I don't think I'm that good. I never got solos or anything like that. I'm just a plain old alto." As per usual, Emilia wasn't giving herself enough credit. The main reason why she never got solos in choir was because she didn't kiss the choir teacher's ass like some of her classmates. "Oh yeah! He told me about that. I, uh, may have mentioned you to him a few times..." By 'a few times,' she meant 'more times than she wanted to admit.' At this point, Emilia could only assume that Ace was tired of hearing about her not-so-hopeless-anymore crush. When the waiter came over to take their orders, Emilia greeted the familiar face and immediately started making small talk with him in Spanish.

"Well, consider me a criminal then," Lola reached over to go lightly squeeze Emilia's cheek with a grin. "Really? Hm...I'd ask you to try me right now, but I don't want you to feel uncomfortable but, if you ever want to, I'd want to hear the 'plain old alto' for myself, if that's okay?" She offered with a soft smile. She didn't want to directly put Emilia on the spot like that, but she had a feeling the other girl underestimated herself. "O-Oh! Well, I hope I made a good first impression on your best friend then," She smiled bashfully. When the waiter came over, she watched with a soft smile as Emilia was in her element. While she could understand what they said and could speak it, she knew just out of sheer nervousness she'd fumble over words and be a flustered mess. So she let them catch up.

“I’ll let you get away with it this time because your cute.” Lola’s cute little smile and eyelash batting were driving her crazy. And the fact that she wanted to hear Emilia sing but was understanding enough not to put her on the spot? Forget it. Why is she so perfect? she wondered to herself. “Oh yeah. He laughed about the alphabet mafia thing for at least a whole day.” Emilia and the waiter asked each other about their families and life in general. Emilia, of course, left out the parts about clinicals stressing her out beyond belief. She ordered her usual chicken taco platter and Sprite, then the waiter turned his attention to Lola, asking for her order in English.

"Oooh, you let me get away with that then I think you'll be in trouble soon." Lola was very close to making a very cheesy 'stealing your heart' type of comment, but held herself back from doing so. At least the principle of it was there, or so she thought. "Yeah it was something that I used to throw around in high school until I was able to come out," She chuckled. Lola watched Emilia and her friend exchange their stories with curiosity for a moment until it was finally her turn. She ordered in Spanish and then followed up with, "I grew up in a predominantly Latinx community so and since Italian and Spanish are very similar, I learned pretty quickly."

Both Emilia and the waiter looked over at Lola, surprised. The waiter went off to get their drinks and Emilia asked Lola, “Well damn, why didn’t you tell me sooner? So you know English, Italian, and Spanish? Do you know any other languages?” Blaine was fluent in Italian because of his grandfather, and Emilia was tempted to ask him for lessons. “So backtracking a bit, when did you come out?”

Lola smiled sheepishly and then said, "I didn't want to interrupt the conversation, but it was just cool to just hear it. Almost reminded me of home. And yeah, I speak a little bit of Mandarin and Korean, because of this science trip that I took, but I'm mostly fluent in Italian and Spanish, what about you?" She asked curiously. She definitely hoped she didn't come off as too much of a nerd. "My junior year of high school, so like...two years ago. My mom hugged me and cried and said, 'Thank God, Lola actually enjoys other people's company!'...I didn't vocalize crushes like my siblings did, mostly cause I've always been the quieter one," She admitted with a chuckle.

"I grew up speaking both English and Spanish at home. Spanish was my mom's first language and she wanted me to be fluent too, so she started teaching me both at the same time. I learned ASL in high school, and I still use it with Ace regularly. Aaaand I took a French class last year to fulfill a language credit, but I can't say that I really speak it. I remember, like, a few phrases." Emilia couldn't help but giggle at Lola's story about her coming out experience. "Damn, your mom really turned your coming out into a roasting session."

"That, is so cool! You've honestly got me beat, let's be real. That's so sweet that you picked up on ASL to communicate with Ace, that's true friendship right there," Lola nodded with a proud grin. "Ugh, French. That is such a hard language to learn. All I can say is Je m'appelle Lola and oui oui baguette," She bit her lip, trying to suppress a giggle, but couldn't help but do so. "It wouldn't be a Siciliani family dinner if there wasn't roasting involved. My mom, nonna, and pops, are legends of that."

"Do I have you beat? You know more languages than I do. But yeah, I wanted to be able to talk to him in a way that made him comfortable. Plus I thought signing would be a good skill to have." Ace was the only person she regularly signed with, though she was able to sign with a patient during one of her clinical rotations last week and she felt accomplished because of it. "Right? French is weird. There's so many letters in the words and they only pronounce half of them! What gives?" She giggled at the 'oui oui baguette' comment. "I remember 'omelette du fromage,' from Dexter's Laboratory." Emilia smiled at her fondly. "Is this what I have to look forward to one day? Roasting?"

“Yes you do. I think learning sign language holds the upper hand to the amount that I know, you know? I think sign language should be something everyone should know,” She grinned. “I love that for you both though. And um, I’d be willing to learn if you’re town to teach me?” she asked with a cute grin, but she meant it. She’d love to learn sign language especially to make Ace feel more comfortable. “Exactly! Like what is even that language? It’s like alphabet soup or something!” Lola laughed alongside with Emilia and gasped excitedly at the Dexter’s Laboratory reference. “Oh my god, yes!!! That one is a classic, it’s honestly the first French phrase I learned,” she admitted with a laugh. “Yes, and once you’re comfortable enough with us, get ready to get roasted.”

“Oh yeah, I can definitely teach you some stuff! Ace would probably do it too. Just tell me when.” She knew Ace would be willing to do it, but didn’t know if he had the time to do it. “Just a heads up, the ASL grammar rules can get a little funky. Frustrating is what it is! When a word ends in -er, -ez, or e with an accent, they all sound like the letter a! How does that make sense?” She huffed dramatically. “I think it might be the first phrase a lot of people in our generation learned.” She laughed nervously at the mention of getting roasted. “Oh, fun.”

"That would be really great! I mean, whenever you both are free, of course. I know schedules can be all over the place and everything," Lola mused with a grin. She was excited at the offer, but she also didn't want to push it either. "Wait what?! Really?! So how do you differentiate whether -er, -ez, or -e to not sound like a?" She asked curiously. "Definitely! I mean Dexter's Lab was one of the most iconic shows of our time between that and the Powerpuff Girls," She chuckled and then shook her head. "Don't worry, we don't start it right off the bat. We take it easy until you're ready."

“We’ll figure something out.” She smiled at Lola, reaching out for her hand. “Fuck if I know!” she answered with a laugh. She liked to think about her French class— and the B- she got in it— as little as possible. “Oh my God, the Powerpuff Girls is my absolute favorite!” She still watched reruns of it to this day. It was one of her comfort shows. “Not the 2016 reboot though. We don’t talk about the 2016 reboot.”

Lola nodded and reached for Emilia's hand with a big smile. "French is truly the weirdest language, I'm convinced," She laughed. "Wait really?! Me too! The Powerpuff Girls practically got me through my first exams last semester, I don't know what I would've done," She explained with a chuckle. "No, absolutely not the 2016 reboot doesn't exist. Although, I have to ask, which one's your favorite?"

"No way! That's crazy," she exclaimed. "That's really your favorite cartoon too? God, it's like you get more perfect the more I get to know you." She had to have some flaw. Everything about her felt too good to be true. "Nope, it never happened. Neither did Teen Titans GO... Which one is my favorite? I think I'd have to say Buttercup. I've always wished I could be a badass like Buttercup, but really I'm just a big ol' softy like Bubbles. Not that that's necessarily a bad thing, just a true thing. If you were a Powerpuff Girl, I think you'd be Blossom. You have that natural-born leader vibe about you."

"Yeah! I mean, I'm definitely far from perfect, though, that's for sure," Lola admitted with a sheepish grin. While it made her heart swell that Emilia thought so highly of her...she often thought of herself as someone who was often closed off from the world. "Teen Titans GO is honestly homophobic, I'm convinced. The light-heartedness, the lack of dark aesthetic...what's the point?" She shook her head with a sigh. "Well for what it's worth, you look like older Buttercup, you've just got Bubbles' spirit, and that's okay. Besides, Bubbles proved herself to be pretty hardcore which scared Blossom and Buttercup," She smirked. "Well...since you said I'm Blossom..." She trailed off as she pulled her phone out, scrolled for a few moments and slid over a picture. "Blossom is my favorite Powerpuff Girl so my mom dressed me up as her for Halloween, especially since my hair's more on the reddish side, like my nonna."

Emilia didn't want to push it, but she honestly though Lola was perfect. "Right?! Like, what was even the point of rebooting that show? They made everyone less hot and more annoying!" She had a huge crush on Raven as a child, but didn't realize at the time that dating girls was even an option for her. "I do? Let me guess, because of the green eye/dark hair combo? I get my hair from my mom, and I guess I get my eyes from my dad. I never met the guy, but my mom's family is full of brown-eyed people, so by default, it has to be from him." Emilia's jaw dropped when Lola showed her the Halloween costume pictures. "Lola, that is the cutest shit I've ever seen! Oh my God! Look at your little bow, and your little dress! Ahhhh!"

Lola nodded with enthusiasm, "Yes! Thank you! I honestly don't understand why they took away the appeal of it all...and I swear if you tell me that Raven and Beast Boy were your faves, I might have to run and buy a ring." Lola was pretty sure between Raven, Beast Boy, Megan Fox, and Sebastian Stan, that they were her bi-awakening, but, it also wasn't something that she had expressed out loud either. Her crushes, were often very, very quiet. "Guilty as charge, but also, and don't hate me, but you have the most attractive rbf. That's what really sold it to me." At the mention of Emilia's father, Lola's head tilted curiously. This was the first time she had ever heard him mention, and frankly...she wasn't really sure if she should ask. She didn't want to make things awkward or make Emilia feel uncomfortable. "Well, green eyes or brown eyes, I still find you pretty," She smiled softly. "Oh god," She giggled, feeling her face heat up again. "I didn't think you'd gush that hard over little me!"

She paused for a moment, flustered by the ring comment. “Oh, uh, Raven and Robin... but I guess one out of two isn’t bad?” She couldn’t exactly pinpoint who or what her pansexual awakening was, as there were several different factors at play. But she knew pretty cartoon characters definitely played some sort of role. “Wait, do I really have an rbf?!” Emilia thought of herself as a generally happy person, despite the fact that her smile was a source of insecurity. “I appreciate that. You already know I think you’re really pretty. I see that look on your face. You can ask questions if you want to. I don’t mind answering.” Though she didn’t talk about her biological father often, the topic was no longer a sore subject for her. She had made peace with the fact that she didn’t know the man and probably never would. “What can I say? You’re just that cute!” she exclaimed, smiling back at her.

Lola chuckled at Emilia's reaction, she truly was endearing. "Yeah, that's still grounds for being wifed up, that's for sure," She teased once more. She was lucky neither of her siblings were around hearing what she was saying because she'd definitely be given shit for it. "You do when you're really focused on something, but--and you're probably going to roast me on this, but I find it really attractive on you. Especially like...the moment when someone catches your attention, it melts away and you smile and your eyes go from laser beams to little stars...wow, that's such a simp thing to say," She said aloud, her face, officially, as pink as the bracelets on her wrist, but it was the truth. It was what she admired most about the brunette. "Thank you," She chuckled. "Okay, I'll only ask if you're comfortable with me asking, however. I don't want to bring up anything sour or make you feel like backed to a wall or anything," She offered. "Not as cute as you," She grinned, wiggling her eyebrows.

"Huh, if I had known that, I would've put it in my Tinder bio! Just kidding, I don't have Tinder," she stated, laughing nervously. She was too nervous for dating apps. If she did use a dating app, she would have to do what she does with her OnlyFans and pretend to be someone else-- a much more confident someone else-- and she didn't like the idea of lying to a potential partner. With OnlyFans, she wasn't trying to find someone, she was just trying to get paid. Emilia once again found herself flustered at Lola's compliments. Lola's words flowed like a poem. She wondered to herself, How was she this perfect? "I think... that might be the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me?" She noticed the other girl's blush, but didn't want to embarrass her by bringing attention to it. "I honestly don't mind talking about it. I mean, I might not have great answers because I really don't know the guy, but it doesn't bother me," she replied, shrugging. "Oh hush. You're cuter."

Lola couldn't help but burst out laughing at Emilia's comment about Tinder. Even if she did or didn't have one, she had to admit it was pretty clever. Although, she, herself only lasted a day on Tinder before deleting her profile. It wasn't something she bragged about after the many unwanted dick pics she got. She shook her head at the thought. "Wait really?" She tilted her head curiously at Emilia. How could no one tell her how pretty she was? How bright her smile was and the way she laughed could echo in one's head all day. "Well, I guess I should just share more of what I think when I see you over time, huh?" Lola meant every word about her, too. "And, you just answered my question," She giggled. "For what it's worth, your mom did one hell of an amazing job raising you, and kudos to your step-dad, too," She smiled. "Oh, so we're just gonna have that battle on who's cuter, is that what I'm gathering," Lola teased, moving her fingers up Emilia's arm playfully.

“Well yeah,” she admitted. “I mean, people have complimented me before. But it’s usually just surface level stuff. Nothing like that. That right there was pure poetry. You should start writing this stuff down. Maybe you’ll get a poetry award one day.” She knew on a conscious level that there were people who found her attractive. She wouldn’t have subscribers if they didn’t. But the ghosts of bullies past still haunted her to this day. She often thought about the classmates who made fun of her weight, her overbite, and the fact that she sometimes would slip into Spanish by accident. She thought about the girls in her dance class who made fun of her for being ugly and wearing hand-me-downs, and because she had to quit because her mom didn’t have the money to afford the classes. She thought about her ex-boyfriend, who never outright insulted her, but didn’t care about her feelings or interests. But Lola was different. But it had her wondering why. Why was she being so nice to her? Did she have an ulterior motive? Or was Emilia just traumatized and in need of genuine human kindness? As she got lost in her own thoughts, she heard speaking and felt her arm being touched, but wasn’t retaining what was being said or what was going on. She focused back in, asking, “Sorry, I zoned out a bit. What was that last part?”

Lola smiled a little and shrugged, "I've never really written poetry before but...I guess I could give it a whirl. Maybe I could ask AJ to help me. He's really big on poetry. Just so you know if I win that award, you'll be the first I thank." As she continued talking, she could tell that something about Emilia was off. The way she suddenly fell silent rang alarm bells in the back of Lola's mind and so she stood up and walked over to sit next to her, closing the space of the table in between them. It wasn't something she often did, but, she knew it struck something in Emilia and the last thing she wanted was for Emilia to be sad. It made Lola wonder as she quietly brought her hand to Emilia's cheek, why in the world would someone want to hurt someone as sweet as her? "I'm sorry if that struck a nerve, Em," She said quietly. "I just...wanted to say that I really admire you."

“It’s okay. You didn’t do anything wrong. I guess my brain is still resetting from earlier...” She still wasn’t 100% after her earlier panic attack. This whole day was a rollercoaster, and she felt as if she had just hit a sudden death drop. She took a deep breath before finally admitting, “Lola, I honestly don’t understand why you’re so nice to me. I appreciate it, really, but I don’t feel like I deserve it.”

"That's okay, you can take your time. Today took a toll on you so I can't expect you to magically be better, but I do want to be here for you too," Lola offered with a soft smile. Anxiety wasn't fun and she could speak it from experience, although she was one to bury her emotions deep down and not really show it to others, that was a different story for a different day, however. "I mean, you were nice to me the day we met, you know? Aside from having a crush on you, you were my first friend here, someone that I could easily relate to. Why do you feel undeserving of kindness?"

“Thanks,” she mumbled, taking Lola’s hand into hers and squeezing it. Emilia wanted to be okay. She wanted to enjoy herself. At minimum, she wanted to put on a brave face and swallow down her thoughts so Lola could enjoy herself. That wasn’t happening though. She could only hope that Lola didn’t feel burdened by her outbursts and shifting moods. When Lola asked why she felt undeserving of kindness, she froze. It was only a matter of time before this question came up. She hesitated before answering, “I-I guess it’s because I’m not used to it. My brain is constantly fluctuating between the thoughts of ‘you’re ugly and no one will ever like you because of that’ and ‘you’re attractive but people will only ever like you for your body.’ And it’s like a metronome that swings back and forth, never stopping in the middle... Wow, I feel like I’m in therapy.”

"I got you, Em," She smiled, lightly squeezing Emilia's hand to reassure her. Lola knew it was hard to keep everything contained, to keep a brave face without feeling like everything just kept getting chipped away. All she wanted to do was be there for Emilia, throughout the ups and downs, the good, the bad, and the ugly. While Lola wasn't the best at handling her own emotions, she was pretty good at being there for when others needed her, and this time, was no different. "Hey, what you're feeling is valid. I mean, whoever made you feel like that sucks and deserves to be kicked into a canyon Sparta style, but, your feelings are valid. That doesn't make you undeserving, though. You are beautiful, inside and out, and you're more than your body...and, I'll remind you every single day that you're worthy if I need to. Cause I care about you."

She squeezed Lola’s hand again, needing the grounding input. The urge to kiss her returned, stronger than before. However, this was interrupted by Juan the waiter bringing their food to the table. She looked over at him, stating, “Muchas gracias!” She then turned back to Lola and spoke. “I care about you too. Thank you, for everything. I can’t even express in words how much I appreciate everything you do for me. You know if you ever need to talk about anything that I’m here for you, right?”

Click here for Part 2

#Lola Siciliani #this isn't finished yet but it's already super long so we figured it would be a good idea to post what we have so far #like and subscribe for part 2 xoxo #self para

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spine-buster · 5 years

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Alone, Together | Chapter 26 | Morgan Rielly

A/N: Just wanted to thank you guys for being understanding about the once-a-week posting schedule. Also, as always, your canon questions are really fun to answer, as are your comments about the chapters! Feel free to keep them coming.

Hope you enjoy this chapter because the next two focus on the playoff series with the Bruins and we all know how that went L O L (I’m still not over it).

When Bee walked into the Scotiabank Arena Monday night, ready for the Leafs to face the Florida Panthers, she already had Aryne and Alannah waiting for her impatiently. Bee hadn’t gone to the game against New York on Saturday because she was…tired. From work. At least that’s what she told them.

She knew that Fred and Tyler wouldn’t say a word to anyone about the fight. She trusted them. On Saturday, when the Leafs faced New York on Hockey Night in Canada, Bee just wasn’t up for going to the arena. She was still emotionally drained from the night before, and even though she and Morgan had a long talk that morning, resolving a lot of things, she didn’t want to be around people. She didn’t want to be around hockey. He respected that. The Leafs ended up losing in overtime, but when Morgan came home, he wasn’t in a bad mood. Instead, he took off his suit, threw on his pajamas, and held Bee in his arms for the whole night. He kept telling her how much he loved her; she kept telling him the same. He kept kissing her tenderly and apologizing; she kept saying there was nothing to apologize about anymore. He kept telling her how he wished he could give her the world, the moon and the stars – anything her heart desired and that she wanted in life; she kept saying she’d throw it all away – every bag, every shoe, every book, every moon and star in the universe – because all she wanted was him.

He asked if she would move in before the playoffs; she nodded her head and said yes. Morgan could have cried.

“We missed you on Saturday night,” Alannah said as she and Aryne hugged Bee. “Was everything okay? You haven’t missed a Saturday night game in a while.”

Bee shrugged her shoulders. “It was…um…”

“We know it wasn’t work,” Aryne put air quotes around the word, giving Bee a look. “Did you and Morgan have a fight?”

Bee bit her lip. “We did, but it was resolved before the game. I was just…I don’t know…emotionally drained, I guess.”

“What was it about?” Aryne asked.

Bee shook her head. She loved Aryne, Aryne was one of her best friends, but she didn’t want to get into it. She didn’t want to air her dirty laundry with her boyfriend to the wife of a member of his hockey team, regardless of how close they were. “The fact of the matter is that we talked about it and solved it. And, um, I’m moving in.”

Both Alannah’s and Aryne’s jaws dropped. “Um, please hold,” Aryne raised her hand dramatically. “You’re moving into Morgan’s place?! When?!”

“Before the playoffs,” Bee revealed. “He’s wanted me to move in for a bit now, and, well, I finally agreed on Saturday night.”

“Bee, this is huge,” Alannah commented with a giant smile on her face. “I mean, especially if he’s wanted you to move in for a while. What was stopping you?”

My own fear? She couldn’t say that out loud, at least not to them, so she settled for another shrug of her shoulders. “I guess I just wanted to get a job first before making such a big life decision,” she said. “I mean, it’s still technically not even a year since we met. We’re just reaching our six-month anniversary. No relationship I’ve ever had has ever gone this…fast.”

“Yeah, but you and Morgan, like…love each other,” Aryne said. “Like, I don’t think I’ve ever met a couple as on the same page as you guys. Morgan looks at you like you put the stars in the night sky, and you look at Morgan with this glimmer in your eyes and the softest smile on your face…and it honestly makes me sick,” she joked, garnering a laugh from both girls. “But I’m serious. You guys just sort of have this way about you, as if you’ve been together forever. You guys get each other. That’s the most that anybody can ask for in a relationship.”

Bee couldn’t help but smile. “And that’s why it feels right,” she said. If Aryne could see it – if the outside world could see it – then it must mean something, right? “It might be…you know, quick for some people, but it feels right to us. It feels like the natural progression of our relationship.”

“Well, I’m so happy for you,” Alannah said. “You’re over his place so much as it is. Why delay the inevitable?”

“That was his reasoning.”

“Aryne!” a voice called suddenly, interrupting their conversation.

Aryne spun around to see who called, and when she recognized the two people waving, she squealed and outstretched her arms to hug them. Alannah was smiling as well but Bee had no idea who they were. Soon, Aryne turned back towards the girls with a giant smile on her face. “Alannah, you guys have met, but Bee – these are my in-laws! Barb, Joe, this is my friend Briony McTavish!”

Bee’s face immediately lit up when she learned who they were. “Mr. and Mrs. Tavares! It’s so nice to meet you!” she shook their hands.

“Aryne has told us so much about you!” Barbara smiled. “Are you excited for the game tonight?”

“Very,” Bee smiled. “Gosh, you guys must be so excited to become grandparents!”

“Our first grandbaby!” Joe smiled, looking down at Aryne’s bump lovingly. “Barbara can’t wait to be a babcha. She’s already got a makeshift nursery set up. Even took out some of John’s old clothes to see if they can be given some new wear.”

“I think I’ve been shopping enough to cover that,” Aryne winked at Joe. “There’s also still the baby shower. Maybe just take out that classic Leafs toddler jacket you bought him for one of his baby photoshoots.”

“Oh my God, I’m going to completely melt if I see that,” Alannah quipped. “It’s like when Hank has his little Leafs onesie on. I totally become a pile of goo.”

“Briony, Aryne tells me this is your first season with the Maple Leafs,” Barbara said. “How have you taken to hockey so far? Do you like it?”

“I like it when we win,” Bee joked, getting a laugh from everyone around her. “To be honest, I’m still learning and getting used to it. Especially the line changes. Now I have to learn about the playoff format. It never ends!”

“It really doesn’t,” Barb shook her head. “John’s…what? 28 now? It’s been 25 years since we started hockey and I’m still learning things.”

“Just wait till the game starts, Barb. Bee knows all about the offside rule,” Aryne wiggled her eyebrows, garnering another round of laughs from the group. Aryne turned on her heels and waved at the group to follow her. “We should get to our seats before puck drop.”

Something must have been in the air at Scotiabank Arena that night, because by the end of the 1st period, it was already 4-2 for the Leafs. John had scored two goals, with Patrick and Jake scoring the other two. Aryne, Joe, and Barbara were going crazy, cheering him on and clapping, and the Sportsnet cameras shot to them to show their celebration. With the way they were sitting – Alannah at the end, then Bee, then Aryne, then John’s parents, Bee was definitely caught on camera. And she only realized this because Angie decided to send her the video, already uploaded onto Sportsnet’s Twitter account, of them all celebrating John’s two goals. Bee’s Rielly jersey definitely gave every viewer an indication of who she was there for.

“I have to go to the washroom,” Aryne mentioned as John’s parents were being interviewed by one of the Sportsnet personalities. “Will you come with me?”

“Of course,” Bee said as they both got up, letting Alannah know where they were going.

Bee began to walk up the stairs but Aryne walked down. When Aryne noticed Bee wasn’t beside her, she looked up. “I don’t want to walk up all those steps,” Aryne grimaced, putting a hand on her bump. “Let’s just go to the regular ones. I’m so tired.”

Bee could only acquiesce as she followed Aryne to the regular bathrooms, not the ones located in the friends and family section high above them on their special level. They waited patiently in the line, and although they kept a steady conversation, Bee noticed some long stares coming their way. She wondered if Aryne noticed them too. When a free stall came up, Aryne bolted inside, leaving Bee to wait for her, scrolling through her phone and reading all the updates she wasn’t able to read earlier in the day because of work. She checked her Instagram, as always, and saw a new barrage of notifications.

You have a new BFF in the Leafs squad every week. First Lucy now Aryne. Must be because they see how desperate you are and want nothing to do with you.

how do i become a wag like u can u help

Wearing Mo’s jersery so u can let everyone know ur with him. Ur a joke.

The desperation R E E K S off of you! You are never going to be as pretty as Cassie or Steph Lachance or any of those girls so quit while you’re ahead! AND GO TO THE GYM FFS!!!!!

I know you’re not trying to be like the other wags. That’s very noble of you, I guess. But do you really think this crusade of yours is going to last? There are only so many comments Morgan will be able to take about how fat you are before he finally sees it and dumps you. You’re only getting fatter and fatter and it’s embarrassing for you and for Morgan. Why would you put him through that? You will never be part of the inner wag circle because of the way you look. That’s just how it is. That and the fact that you are bleeding Mo dry of his money.

“I’m telling you, that’s Briony McTavish,” a louder than anticipated whisper broke Bee out of her thoughts. She looked up from her phone quickly to see three girls standing near the entrance, one with a phone in her hands directed right at her. The second they noticed that Bee was looking at them, the girl holding the phone lowered it dramatically and put it in her purse.

Bee sighed. “You guys can approach me, you know,” she called out to them. “I don’t bite.” The girls’ mouths gaped open, like they didn’t know she could speak. She smiled politely to try to get the girls to calm down. “I mean it girls, I don’t bite. Did you want to speak to me?”

The girls shuffled over, looks of fear mixed with worship and complete shock adorning their faces. Two blondes, one with straight hair and one with short curly hair, clearly couldn’t believe what was happening. Their brunette friend – the one who had the phone in her hand – was able to find her words first. “Sorry, we just think you’re really pretty,” she said. “It’s nice to see a wag who isn’t a skinny blonde.”

“Well, thanks,” Bee said, unsure if she should be grateful for the compliment. “You could have asked to like…take a picture of whatever. I wouldn’t have minded if you had asked. I would just appreciate it if you didn’t take creeper shots of me.”

“Sorry,” straight-blonde-hair-girl said. “It’s just…well, we know that Morgan uploaded that picture of you on his birthday, but you’ve just been all over the blogs online--”

“The blogs? All over? What do you mean?”

“You know…like, people are talking about you on the bunny blogs!” straight-blonde-hair-girl clarified, like it was the best thing in the world to get talked about online. “We know they’re bunny blogs and we should take everything they say with a grain of salt, but like, there was that whole thing where you were in Cassie’s New Years video that basically blew up all of Leafs Tumblr and the bunny blogs, and then the Vancouver pictures and then Morgan’s birthday pictures--”

“Seems like a lot of people are stealing a lot of my pictures,” Bee said sarcastically.

“It wasn’t us, we swear,” the brunette jumped in. “Everybody is just, like, wondering who you are. That’s all. There are like, the mean girls who start rumours about you, but nobody listens to them. I guess because you aren’t as open as Cassie people just want to know more.”

“Why aren’t you as open as Cassie? ” the one with the short curly blonde hair finally spoke.

Bee couldn’t believe she would ask such a question, but she also knew that these girls were going to write into those same bunny blogs the second this conversation was done with, so she had to watch what she was going to say. “Morgan and I are just private people. Especially Morgan. He’s super private and super protective. And we want to keep it that way.”

“Did Morgan help you get the job at Scotiabank?”

Bee’s body stiffened. “How…how do you guys know I work at Scotiabank?”

“Well, like, someone Googled your name I guess, and it was on some website,” the young blonde said. “It’s been all over the bunny blogs.”

A shiver ran up Bee’s spine. She couldn’t believe how much information was out there about her, that they managed to find and steal from her, yet these girls still wanted to know more. Should she just come out with her blood type? What her favourite movie was when she was five? Her DNA configuration? What more could they want from her? “No, he didn’t help me get the job. I have a Master’s in Financial Economics. I got the job all on my own.”

All three of the girls smiled on cue. “Told you so!” the brunette said to the straight-blonde-hair girl. She turned her attention back towards Bee. “Sorry, it’s just that there was this huge thing online about whether or not you quit school when you met Morgan or if you had just finished your program, and there was this whole thing that Sydney Esiason said in a comment on Insta but everyone thinks it’s about Cassie, and some girl claiming to be from your program was all like ‘We’re just done, Briony’s one of the top students in the course’ but someone else, also apparently from your program, was like ‘She quit the second she started going out with Mo because all she’s ever done is aspire to be a wag and all she used to talk about was bagging a Leafs player’ and it was all--”

“Please don’t believe everything you read on the Internet,” she interrupted. The girl hadn’t taken a breath since mentioning everything that was happening online – it seemed like she lived her entire life there. More shivers ran up Bee’s spine. To think someone in her program was engaged in this – that they even had the time to engage in this – was beyond her. “I’m just a girl trying to work and I happen to have a professional athlete boyfriend. That’s all I am. There’s nothing special about me besides my Master’s degree.”

“Morgan definitely thinks there’s something special about her, and I do too,” Aryne’s voice interrupted their conversation as she made her way out of her stall. She looked over at the girls as she washed her hands; again, their jaws dropped at the sight of John Tavares’s wife. “You can write to all those bunny blogs and tell them Morgan’s never gonna get with them, so they need to stop,” she said, her voice strict. “You can also tell everyone that the DMs Bee gets are hilarious and pathetic all at the same time, and we laugh at them over bottles of sauvignon franc at restaurants those girls could only dream of eating in.”

The girls’ eyes went wide. “It’s not us--”

“I know it’s not you. It’s all those Toronto party girls who like to cause shit and it’s the Instagram model girls who wouldn’t be able to get a contract with any legit agency if their life depended on it, but be the messenger,” Aryne winked, though her voice still strict and curt with them. “I don’t care what you say about me. Call me a bitch on every single bunny blog on the internet – I really don’t care. But anybody who goes after Bee is gong to have a problem with me.”

“Will do,” the brunette smiled, a feisty look in her eyes. “Are any of the younger Leafs single?”

Bee’s eyes went wide at the abrasiveness and audacity of the girl. Her friends slapped at her arm as she was in a staring contest with Aryne. “They’re not into jailbait. But I’m sure you’ll just go and befriend Cassie to see.” Aryne looked at Bee and grabbed her hand. “Let’s go. The period’s about to start and I want to actually watch the game.”

Aryne linked her arm with Bee’s, and when they were far enough away from the washroom, she looked at her. “Don’t ever think that you need to speak to those types of girls ever again,” she warned. “They’re not worth your time. Everything you just said is going to go on all those bunny blogs.”

“You don’t think it will clear stuff up?” Bee asked innocently.

“It never clears stuff up,” Aryne countered. “Rumours are still going to spread about you. Remember when we watched the Isles game at your place and I told you that you have your priorities in order?” she asked. Bee nodded her head. “You still do. But keeping them in order is harder than having them in the first place. And those girls…their only priority is either hooking up with a hockey player or making it seem like they’ve hooked up with one. And if they’re not trying to hook up, they want to make it seem like they’re inside their circle and friends with the wags. They don’t even have morals.”

Bee knew that she needed to listen to Aryne. She didn’t have a clue about any of this and she was so in over her head that she didn’t even know where to begin, what was right and what was wrong, what was appropriate and what was not. It was a mystery to navigate this minefield; every step she took, she felt like she was going to explode, or that she’d set off something that would get the sirens ringing and the armies rushing the battlefield. “Let’s go watch some hockey,” Bee announced, resolved to not giving it another thought. What was more important than what those girls told her was being spread online was that John was on the verge of a hat trick and Morgan was on the verge of approaching seventy points.

“Atta girl,” Aryne wiggled her eyebrows. “Now let’s go watch my hot husband dominate Florida.”

Dominate John did. Only six minutes into the second period, he completed his hat trick thanks to a rebound from a shot by Morgan. It rained hats in the arena as Bee, Alannah, Aryne, and John’s parents danced, cheered, high fived, and hugged each other in celebration, the cameras panning to them and showing them on the jumbotron for the fans to see. The assist by Morgan meant that he was on his 69th point, and Bee wanted so desperately for him to get 70.

Then the magic happened. Only four minutes into the third period, John scored a fourth goal. Aryne went nuts, as did John’s parents, and rightfully so – it was his first four goal game for the Leafs. Barbara even began to cry as the fans kept roaring their applause for their hometown boy. Like a cherry on top of a perfect ice cream sundae of a Monday night, Zach scored the seventh goal for the Leafs, with an assist from Morgan, gaining Zach the distinction of being a 20-goal scorer and getting Morgan to a 70-point season. Bee teared up as she hugged Alannah after the goal. She knew he was having a career season, but he blew his previous points total out of the water – by almost 20 points.

After the game, Bee waited for Morgan in the usual spot, eagerly anticipating his arrival. Media was taking longer than normal – she figured because of the night John had. She checked the usual Twitter accounts for Sportsnet and TSN to see what they were saying and uploading onto their feeds. She checked her Instagram to see more DMs, but only read Angie’s who sent her a compilation video Sportsnet had uploaded of the group celebrating all four goals. Then, for the first time in her life, she Googled ‘puckbunny blogs tumblr’ to see if what those girls were saying – and what Aryne told her – was actually true. Automatically, what seemed like hundreds of links popped up for her to click on, and she clicked the very first. Right at the top of the feed, she saw her name.

I met Bee McTavish (Morgan Rielly) at the Leafs game tonight in the washroom of all places lol. She’s a sweetheart. Super super nice. Doesn’t like that all her photos got posted everywhere bc she is trying to remain super private and says Morgan is super private too. She was in the washroom with Aryne (John Tavares wife) who was much ruder. Oh and she has a Master’s. Never quit her course when she met Morgan. It was all lies ☺ bye!

Aw thanks anon! Good to know! We all knew Morgan would go for someone just like that! It’s too bad a lot of people won’t respect their wishes.

Bee McTavish is bigger in person but pretty. Maybe it was the jersey. Saw her at the Leafs game tonight sitting with Aryne Tavares and John’s parents. Went crazy after Mo got his 70th point. I know Sportsnet showed her a bunch of times but she was on the jumbotron too after John’s fourth goal and it was really cute. Small applause bc the crowd recognized John’s parents and wife.

I guess Mo doesn’t mind her size anon. Thanks for the update! She must be really close with Aryne if she sat with her and John’s parents? Did she know them from before and that’s how she and Mo met?

Bee McTavish is lovely. Everybody needs to get off her dick. If you watch the videos from Sportsnet she’s so genuinely happy for Morgan and the team when they do well. Whenever I see her at games she’s one of like, the only wags – esp the young wags – who is always paying attention to the game instead of being on insta.

Thanks anon! Seems to go with what a lot of ppl are saying.

Those people saying Bee is nice are probably her friends she’s sent to say stuff about her. She’s honestly not that nice. A TOTAL social climber. Pretends to be all cute and innocent but she’s been on the Toronto party scene for a while and was stalking Leaf players before she got with Mo. Rumour has it she slid into Auston’s DMs (what Toronto girl hasn’t lbr) and even Willy Nylander’s before she landed Mo. Shows how much of an idiot she is bc Willy wasn’t even in Toronto till December!!!!!

Wow ok anon thank u!!!

Whoever sent in that last ask is so incredibly dumb lol yeah she’s a known Toronto party girl yet her whole instagram feed when she was public was books, her coursework from her Master’s, and food she’d cook??? Try doing ur research next time sweetie you sound so jealous! Ur probably trying to hook up with Mo even though he’s taken. Just makes u a slut. Not to mention a homewrecker.

I just post all my asks. Not necessarily what I believe.

Bee couldn’t help but snort as she swiped to delete the tab. There was no way she was going down that rabbit hole. She stuffed her phone back into her pocket and waited impatiently for Morgan. When he finally came out, with John, Zach, and Tyler in tow, she couldn’t help the giant smile that appeared on her face as he walked towards her.

“You ready to go?” he said, extending his hand towards hers.

She grasped onto it tightly. “Come here.”

When he was close, she stood on her toes so she could reach him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders before giving him a long, lingering kiss. “You wanna talk about it?” she whispered.

“Talk about what?”

She smiled slightly. “Mr. Seventy-point season.” A smile crept upon his lips as he closed his eyes and shook his head – his version of ‘I don’t want to make a big deal out of it.’ But Bee was going to make a big deal out of this. “I’m very proud of you,” she whispered quietly, so only he could hear. “I’m so, so proud of you.”

Morgan bent down to kiss her again. “That’s all that matters,” he whispered.

“What?”

“That you’re proud.”

“I’m always proud of you.”

“I know you are, but it’s especially important tonight.”

“Because you hit seventy points tonight?” she giggled.

“Stoooooppppp,” Morgan buried his head into the crook of her neck. “Stop saying it.”

“Stop saying what? That you hit seventy points this season?” she smirked, moving away slightly so she could look at him again

“Noooo no no no ,” he shook his head before bending down to kiss her again. “Is that the only way you’re gonna stop saying it?”

“Mhm,” she nodded her head.

“Am I gonna have to kiss you all night?”

“You tell me Mr. Rielly,” she pecked at his lips. “What do you mean ‘it’, anyway? Do you mean the fact that you got sev--”

He kissed her again, dragging her quickly towards the door. “I gotta get you home quick.”

***

“Okay, I can help carry all the garment bags down.”

“I’ll follow behind you with the box of handbags.”

“I’ve got the shoes.”

“Make sure all the books are taken. We may need to take two trips.”

“Naz, you can just sit there and look pretty.”

“HEY!” Naz yelled in protest to Morgan’s comment. John, Jake, Mason, and Tyler laughed at the scowl on Naz’s face as Ashley stuck her tongue out at the boys. “Are we forgetting these guns can b--”

“Do not brag about how much you can bench press right now or else I’m going to punch you in the throat,” Jake grimaced. “Can we just move all this stuff to Morgan’s? Because the quicker we do so the quicker we can eat Chinese food.”

“Yes please, because baby’s hungry,” Aryne rubbed her belly.

The boys grabbed their designated boxes of Bee’s things to bring down the moving elevator, and the girls grabbed the various garment bags and made their way down the main elevator’s to Lucy and Aryne’s waiting SUVs in the parking garage. Once they loaded everything in, Bee and Angie drove with Lucy to Morgan’s apartment, while Ashley hitched a ride with Aryne. The boys ended up taking a second trip up to the apartment to get the remainder of Bee’s things before packing everything into Naz’s SUV and driving to Morgan’s apartment. They were lucky that Bee didn’t have a lot of things, comparably – no furniture to move, no giant ottomans or kitchen tools and accessories to pack away – just her half-bookshelf, taken from her old apartment, with its modest stack of books she’d added to sparingly during her time at Naz and Ashley’s apartment.

When the boys arrived at Morgan’s apartment, the girls were already rearranging the closet to incorporate Bee’s clothing. They shoved all his game-day suits to one side while they hung her work clothes on the top bar and her more casual clothes that still deserved a hanger on the bottom bar. Angie called out to Morgan that it was time to invest in another shoe rack where his Jordan’s collection wouldn’t take it over. Aryne was busy ordering the Chinese food. Ashley rearranged the bathroom drawers so all of Bee’s products could fit. The boys kept Bee’s bookshelf right next to the entertainment centre – he’d be buying bigger bookshelves soon, anyway. They decided to set the table while the girls continued to work on the closet behind the closed bedroom door.

“Did you consent to whatever’s going on in there?” Tyler asked as they all heard a loud thump coming from his bedroom. “They could be painting your room purple for all you know. They could be installing a Habs mural. A giant picture of Randy from Trailer Park Boys on your ceiling.”

Morgan shrugged his shoulders. Jake rolled his eyes. “Even if he didn’t, what’s he gonna say? She could paint the walls neon green and he’d nod and smile and say he loved it,” Jake said.

“Let’s not act like girls don’t run the world,” John commented with a chuckle. “Our wives definitely run our lives.”

“You got that right,” Naz piped up. “The other day Ashley had a craving for anchovies. Anchovies. Guess who had to go out to go buy anchovies at midnight or else her brain was going to explode.”

“That’s why I remain a bachelor,” Tyler said. He turned dramatically towards Mason. “Unless you have a sister?”

“Only a brother, dude.”

“And I reiterate, that’s why I remain a bachelor.”

Morgan’s phone buzzed, indicating that the Chinese food had been delivered. “You girls have three minutes until the food is here!” he yelled as he shoved his phone into his pocket. “Can you be a dear and come help me with the bags?” he asked Jake, who nodded his head. “And can you guys go check on them? Make sure they’re actually not installing a picture of Randy on my ceiling or throwing out any of my clothes?”

When Morgan and Jake came through the door again with the Chinese food, everybody was out in the main area. Aryne was already sitting at the table while everyone else mingled about; Bee was grabbing something out of the fridge – probably a hot sauce – and Tyler and John were leaning up against the couch. Aryne saw them first and she began clapping when she saw the food. “It’s here!”

Everybody gathered around the table quickly. Bee helped herself to too much Cantonese chow mein. Everything was passed around – the chicken balls, the sweet and sour sauce, the chicken fried rice, the plain steamed rice, the spring rolls, the beef with broccoli, the kung pao shrimp and the Szechuan chicken. Everybody’s plate and glass was full of goodness. For a while everyone was even silent because they were stuffing food into their faces. It was Tyler who broke the silence. “Have you guys seen how well the Raptors are doing? Their post-season is gonna be amazing.”

Everybody nodded their heads. “Hopefully ours is gonna be equally as amazing,” Naz commented.

“You think we’ll be able to go to some games?” Aryne asked her husband.

“Aryne, are you aware of who your husband is?” Tyler asked, causing the table to laugh. “He’s John Tavares. He can walk into anywhere and get whatever he wants.”

“Raptors tickets are gonna be the hottest commodity in town if they do well,” Mason commented. “Good luck with that.”

“I’m sure Masai will hook up Kyle with something,” Naz said. “Besides, Bee’s gotta go to her first Raptor’s game.”

The mention of her name gave Bee an opportunity to look at everyone – really look at all the people surrounding her – and she felt a pang of gratitude hit her chest. There was excitement, of course, of moving in with Morgan – of knowing that, when their friends were gone, she wouldn’t have an apartment to go back to; that this was her apartment too now. There was thankfulness, of course, for everyone helping her to move her things, despite how little she had and how quickly it took them to do it – she barely needed to bribe them with a Chinese food dinner before they said yes to helping. But more than anything, gratitude. Gratitude for them surrounding her. Gratitude for their help and support.

Gratitude that they were her family.

#morgan rielly #morgan rielly imagine #morgan rielly imagines #morgan rielly fic #toronto maple leafs #toronto maple leafs imagine #toronto maple leafs imagines #toronto maple leafs fic #nhl #nhl imagine #nhl imagines #nhl fic #hockey #hockey imagine #hockey imagines #hockey fic #alone together series

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superfreakerz · 5 years

Text

Cursed

I originally wanted to write this for @nalu-week but I was late lol. Still, I really liked the idea so I'm going to post it now anyways! This is a Fruits Basket crossover, nalu style! The idea was given to me by @princess--alice-xxx :D

"Cursed"

Rated M for sexual themes.

Summary: Fruits Basket crossover AU. Lucy is in for a surprise when she stumbles into Natsu and finds out that he transforms into an animal of the Chinese zodiac.

Cursed

Lucy didn't know much before about her classmate, Natsu Dragneel. She knew that he was friends with her best friend, Levy, that he was a distraction in class, and that there wasn't a day that went by when he wasn't sporting his signature, scaly scarf. She also knew that he was drop dead gorgeous with his unruly tufts of pink hair, his mesmerizing dark orbs, and his mischievous grin that could stop the whole room. Other than that, the boy used to be a mystery to her.

Key word being used to.

Now, she was just stumbling across his greatest secret.

After class had ended, Lucy headed straight for book club, just as she did every Thursday. The girl loved book club more than anything. It allowed her to read new novels she never heard of before, led her to Levy, and even gave her inspiration for stories of her own. It was what she looked forward to every week.

Only this week, fate had more interesting things in store for her that Thursday.

After realizing that she forgot her bag, Lucy rushed back to the classroom, urging Levy to go without her and that she'd catch up. Hastily slipping past lingering students, the girl didn't waste even a second before throwing open the door and rushing inside, only to slam into something warm and firm.

Next thing Lucy knew, there was a puff of smoke and she was falling forward. She fell to the floor with a loud thud.

"Ow," the girl mumbled to herself. She sat up, rubbing her forehead. That was sure to leave a mark.

Just as she was about to get up, a muffled sound caught her attention. Glancing around the room, she searched for the source of the noise, only to find that the room was empty save for herself. Still, she could hear the faint voice coming from somewhere nearby.

Shifting to get up, she heard a sharp intake of breath.

"Will you get offa me already!?" a voice shouted, the sound coming from beneath her.

Lucy jumped with a startle, slowly lowering her gaze to her legs, which were folded underneath her. Her heart stopped, the first thing she noticed being red scales. With a scream loud enough to wake all of Fiore, she jumped off of the creature and onto the closest desk.

Not wanting to lose sight of it, she carefully leaned over to find the creature- she still wasn't sure what it was- laying on its back. Its scales were a bright red. Its belly was yellow, a sharp contrast from the rest of it. Once she found the creature's legs, she knew that it wasn't a snake. It must've been some sort of lizard.

Lucy whimpered. Now she was stuck with some strange, possibly venomous lizard. She would call Levy to help her, but unfortunately her phone was in her bag, which was at her desk.

On the opposite side of the room.

The girl watched as the lizard flipped itself over onto its hind legs, standing at about a foot. She may not have been an expert in lizards, but she'd never seen one stand before.

"Oh Mavis," she breathed out, her voice hushed in fear. "Please don't jump, please don't jump, please don't-"

"I'm not gonna jump so calm down, alright?"

Lucy's brows rocketed upwards at the voice. It was familiar, the same voice she heard earlier. She could swear she recognized it from somewhere else.

"H-Hello?" she called out, her eyes trained on the door. Someone must've been outside the classroom or something because there was no way in hell the lizard was talking to her. Nope. No way.

But sure enough…

"Down here," it said.

Lucy felt dizzy as she trailed her gaze back to the lizard, who was now staring at her with what she assumed was an annoyed look. The fall she took must've knocked her out earlier. She was dreaming. That had to be it!

"Uhh, maybe you should get down from there," the lizard said. Judging from its voice, she assumed it was a male.

"What? So you can bite me? No thanks, I'm fine up here," Lucy replied.

"You don't look so good. You're startin' to sway. I think you're about to pass out."

"Even though this is just a dream, I'd still prefer not to get attacked. I'll take my chances."

"I always had a feelin' you were weird, but now I know for sure you are."

Lucy arched a brow. "Wait, what do you mean by always?"

The lizard sighed before using his claws to close the door to the classroom.

"I'd give it about five more seconds," he said.

"Give what five more seconds?"

Suddenly, a puff of smoke surrounded the lizard. A shrill scream bubbled up to Lucy's lips, caught off guard. When the smoke died down, she found that she was in for yet another surprise.

Standing in front of her was none other than her classmate, Natsu Dragneel.

And he was naked.

That was all Lucy needed to send her off the edge. Her lids grew heavy, her eyes rolling in the back of her head as she wobbled on shaky legs. She could feel a cold gust of wind hitting her body as she fell forward.

"Oh shit!" she heard Natsu say right before she crashed into a firm surface, hot to the touch.

They fell back onto the floor, Lucy on top of him once again. That same puff of smoke appeared once more, Natsu having turned back into a lizard. He gave a pained yelp, which helped Lucy get out of her hazy daze.

"How many times are you gonna crush me!?" he said, trying to squirm out from beneath the blonde.

Lucy slowly moved off of him. Her mind was working on overdrive, trying to put the pieces together and figure out just what the hell was happening. It had to have been a prank of some sorts. She'd seen many talent shows that featured magicians able to pop up out of nowhere. Perhaps that's what he was doing, replacing himself with a lizard.

Yeah, that made sense.

"My tail!" she heard Natsu shout. He held his tail in his claws. It was bent weirdly, probably from being pressed underneath her. He turned an angry gaze on her. "This is your fault! I told you to get down from there! I knew you were gonna pass out!"

Lucy's face etched with fury at his accusation. "My fault? You're the pervert doing magic tricks and replacing yourself with a lizard!"

"Okay one, I'm not a pervert. That's Gray. Two, I'm not a lizard. I'm a dragon, got it? And three, I'm not a magician. This is just a curse."

"Curse?"

"It's a long story. For now, I need you to stop yelling. Someone's gonna hear you and come in here."

"Good! I don't want to be in the same room as a lying pervert!"

"Oi! Quit callin' me that! I'm not-!"

A puff of smoke appeared yet again, leaving Natsu naked in his human form.

"Okay, I see why you think this would make me a pervert," he said, holding his hands up in surrender to keep the girl from screaming. "But I can explain."

Lucy's eyes went wide, her face set ablaze as she stared at the bare man in front of her. Her gaze moved on its own, glazing over his abs and down to his-

"KYAAA!" she shouted, slapping her hands over her eyes.

Natsu winced at the volume of her voice, quickly slapping his hand over her mouth. Of course, this only freaked her out even more. She screamed against his palm, thrashing around before biting his hand. With a yelp, he pulled his hand back.

"You just bit me!" the boy shouted, glaring at the blonde.

"You deserved it!" Lucy retorted, making sure not to remove her hands from her eyes. "Just put your clothes back on, pervert!"

A vein ticked in Natsu's forehead after being called that again. Muttering incentives to himself, he hastily threw on his clothes. Wrapping his scarf around his neck, he gave a relieved sigh.

"You can look now," he said, watching as Lucy shook her head.

"I'm scared you're going to flash me again."

"I didn't flash you! It wasn't my fault!"

"You really expect me to believe that?"

Natsu sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Look, I'll explain everything, alright? Just come with me."

Lucy parted her fingers slightly, peeking at the boy to make sure he was really dressed. Only after did she nod.

"Fine. But if you even think of lying to me or flashing me again, I'm going straight to the police!"

"Yeah, yeah. Let's go."

Natsu led her to an empty, rundown park. He sat on one of the picnic benches, gesturing for her to take a seat as well. She refused.

"You know, now that I think about it, I probably shouldn't have followed a boy that just flashed me to an abandoned park," Lucy said.

"It's not like I'm gonna do anything to you," Natsu replied with a shrug. "I just need you to promise you won't tell anyone what you saw today."

"And why the hell should I promise that? What you did was sexual harassment, you know."

"I already told you it was the curse!"

"What curse?"

Natsu groaned. "It's called the curse of Fairy Tail. There are twelve of us. We each represent one of the signs from the Chinese zodiac. Whenever we're hugged by someone of the opposite sex, we turn into our zodiac form. I'm the dragon."

Lucy glared at the boy in front of her. "You really expect me to believe that?"

Losing his patience, Natsu stood up from the bench, moving right in front of her. "Hug me again and find out for yourself."

A blush rose to her cheeks. "N-No way! I don't need to hug you to know that you're lying!"

"Fine, then let's go find Levy."

"Levy-chan?" Lucy asked, arching a brow. "Why do you want to find her."

"She's one of us. Duh."

She would've been annoyed by his 'duh' comment if she wasn't so curious.

"Alright, fine," she said, planting her hands on her hips. "If Levy-chan says you're telling the truth, I'll forgive you for what happened. If not, then I'll beat the hell out of you."

His lips curled into a mischievous grin. "You really think you can?"

"I have a pretty mean kick."

"Now I kinda wanna tell you I'm lying so that I can see just how strong that kick of yours is."

"Keep annoying me and you'll find out."

Making their way back to the school, Lucy popped her head into the room where the book club met up. After gaining Levy's attention, she waved for her to come outside.

Closing the door behind her, Levy arched a brow finding that Natsu was with Lucy. The two never spent time together.

"Where were you, Lu-chan?" Levy asked. "Book club is almost over!"

"We needa talk," Natsu said. "C'mon."

The trio headed back to the classroom. Natsu closed the door behind him and locked it.

"So, I might've messed up," he said, turning to meet Levy's gaze.

"What did you do?" the petite girl asked.

"Lucy found out our secret."

"What?"

Lucy breathed a sigh of relief at Levy's confused expression. Just as she thought, Natsu was lying.

"I knew you were lying! I'm so going to beat the-!"

"How did she find out!?" Levy shouted, cutting the blonde off.

Lucy whipped her head towards the other girl. "Wait, what? You mean he was telling the truth?"

Levy chuckled awkwardly. "Yeah, he was. You must be shocked."

"B-But we hug all the time!"

"The curse only works if the hug is from someone of the opposite sex."

Lucy's mouth parted as she leaned against the wall for support.

"No way," she breathed out.

Natsu shrugged, his arms crossed behind his head. "I'm surprised you didn't find out sooner."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, you hang out with a bunch of us. I figured someone woulda told you by now."

"What!?"

"He's right," Levy said. "Well, about you hanging out with a bunch of us. Not about us telling you. We aren't dumb."

"Wait, who else is like you guys?" Lucy asked. Her mind was short-circuiting.

"Well, there's Erza, Juvia, Cana, and Mira. All of us are cursed."

"And Gray, Gajeel, and Jellal," Natsu added. "But you don't hang out with them."

"Aren't there supposed to be three more?"

"You wouldn't know them. They're older than us."

Lucy brought her fingers to her temples. She could feel an oncoming headache.

"So you guys really turn into animals when you're hugged by the opposite sex?" Lucy asked, still unable to completely wrap her head around it.

"Yep," Natsu answered nonchalantly. "And you're the only one outside of Fairy Tail who knows our secret!"

Lucy faced Levy. "What zodiac sign are you?"

The other girl pouted. "I'm the rat. Sadly, I'm not one of the cuter animals."

"It makes sense though. Rats are supposed to be intelligent and resourceful. What about everyone else?"

"Erza is the monkey, Juvia is the rabbit, Mira is the goat, and Cana is the horse."

"Gajeel is the ox, Gray is the tiger, and Jellal is the snake," Natsu added.

"And you're the lizard," Lucy teased, stifling her laughter.

He glared at her. "Dragon, okay? I'm a dragon!"

"Pretty small for a dragon."

"That's only because a real-sized dragon would destroy everything!"

"Oh, so you can change your size?"

"Well, no but-"

"You're a lizard."

"Yeah? Well you were pretty scared of this 'lizard' earlier! You shoulda seen yourself! You were screaming at the top of your lungs! You even jumped on a desk! That gave the perfect view to your underwear, you know?"

Lucy blushed in embarrassment, chasing after the cackling boy. She was so going to wring his neck if she ever caught up to him.

"I knew you were a pervert!" she shouted.

"Stop callin' me that!" Natsu shot back.

Levy sighed, rubbing her temple as the other two bickered. "Well, I'm going to go find Erza and tell her about this… development. I'm sure we're in for an earful." Seeing that the other two were too caught up in their argument to hear her, she shrugged before heading out.

"Stop running so I can kick you now!" Lucy demanded.

Natsu laughed, his cheeks starting to hurt with how wide his grin was. "Gotta catch me first! What's wrong, Lucy? Can't catch up to a lizard?"

Getting fed up, Lucy cut him off and tackled him to the floor, triggering his curse. By this point, she was starting to get used to the puff of smoke that accompanied Natsu's change in form. Wrapping her hand around his scaly abdomen, she gave him a smirk.

"Looks like I finally caught you," she teased.

Natsu huffed, a small wisp of fire slipping past his sharp teeth. "Yeah, yeah."

Lucy ran her finger over his scales. "You know, it's kind of cool that you guys change forms."

"Cool? It's called a curse for a reason, Lucy. It sucks. Every time a girl tries to throw themselves at me, I gotta think quick enough to dodge them or else I'm gonna end up on some researcher's desk while he cuts me up and tries to figure out why I change forms."

The girl shrugged. "That's true. But it also brings you guys closer together. Not to mention it makes you special."

Natsu stared up at the blonde, his eyes widening a fraction. "You don't think it's weird?"

"Oh, it's weird alright. But you called me weird too, remember? So I guess I have no room to talk."

The dragon grinned. "You are pretty weird. The weirdest person I know since you're so calm about all of this."

"I wouldn't say calm. I almost fainted earlier."

"Oh yeah. Then I had to catch you and you fell on me. You're pretty heavy, you know that?"

Lucy grabbed his tail with her other hand as she glared at him. "Don't make me rip you in two."

"So violent!"

"Only because you know how to annoy me."

Natsu laughed at her expression. Her cheeks were puffed out in annoyance as she narrowed her eyes at him. He was about to reply when the effect of his curse wore off. His body was engulfed in a puff of smoke as he morphed back to normal. He was left standing bare yet again.

Only this time, a hand rested on his upper thigh.

Lucy's face burned crimson as her gaze was immediately met with a part of Natsu she had never seen before. Swallowing thickly, she tried to force her gaze away. Realizing that her hand was on his upper thigh because of where she was holding him earlier, she tore it away with a squeal.

"I-I didn't mean to touch you there!" she shouted.

Natsu clamped his teeth on his lower lip, trying to stop his body from growing hard. Unfortunately, his attempts were fruitless. It wasn't his fault! There was a beautiful girl on her knees right in front of his groin and her hand was on his thigh for god's sake!

Lucy felt like she was on fire, the pit of her stomach coiling as the area between her thighs throbbed in arousal. She could see his cock growing hard in excitement, and even though she didn't have any experience in this sort of thing, she had heard enough about Cana's sexual endeavors to know what it meant.

"This is the second time I've caught you staring at me, you know," Natsu said, grabbing her attention.

Lucy flailed her arms around, her heart thrashing around her ribcage. She shot up to her feet and turned around in mortification.

"It's not my fault you change back so suddenly!" the girl shouted.

Natsu laughed. He wasn't the kind of person to get embarrassed easily, so he didn't let what just happened bother him too much. Instead, he got dressed.

"I'm dressed now," he said.

Swallowing thickly, Lucy turned to face him. Her eyes immediately dropped to the hem of his pants.

"And that makes a third time," Natsu teased with a heavy smirk.

Lucy groaned, heading to the opposite side of the room to grab her backpack- the catalyst for how this all began. Glaring at him, she headed for the door.

"I'm going home," she said.

Natsu laughed, following her out the door. "What? Sure you don't wanna go for a fourth look?"

"Shut up!"

"Oi, you don't have to yell! It's not my fault you're a pervert!"

Lucy groaned again. Something told her that she was going to be stuck with Natsu following her around from now on. In truth, she couldn't say that she minded.

The day was hectic, to say the least. Hell, she still wasn't completely sold that she wasn't just dreaming. Still, she was sure that her life was about to get a whole lot more interesting with Natsu around.

#nalu week #fairy tail #nalu #lucy heartfilia #natsu dragneel #ftfanfiction #cursed #super writes

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EastEnders Iconic Episodes:- Who Killed Lucy Beale? (30th Anniversary)

Tuesday 28th July 2020

Good evening everyone! I'm sorry for the late post, but with lock-down slowly easing. I am now back at both my every day jobs, and also looking making some huge personal changes too, it's been a busy for me that's for sure! But I am now back and I'm happy to see that the latest iconic episode to be shown was the memorable revelation as to who killed Lucy Beale? This was a brilliant, live, hour-long special episode to celebrate the soap's 30th anniversary, everyone went crazy with the #EELive! What amazes me is that it has been 5 years since Lucy died? That has flown super quick! I remember this episode was another gripping one, it was also people had been waiting for for 10 months! Who did kill Lucy? Everything was about to be revealed in this episode which originally aired 19 February 2015!

As you can see from the picture above, there were many characters in the front line who could've been possible culprits. These were the ones the soap kept teasing to us ... from left to right ... Pam, Lee, Cindy, Max, Denise, Ian, Peter, Abi, Jane, Ben, Whitney, Les and Jay! As far as I know, each one had had a run-in with Lucy up until her death. But who had committed the murder?!

I love that right at the beginning of the episode, they kinda remake the opening of EastEnders' very first episode from 19th February 1985, absolutely perfect to mark it's 30th anniversary! It starts with Stacey, Martin and Kush breaking into someone's house and Stacey stating "Cor, it really stinks in here, doesn't it?!" ... there looked to have been a fire in the house and as they make their way into the house, they find the body of Nick Cotton, (absolutely mirroring the first episode where the cast find the body of Reg Cox) ... as I'm watching it now, I can't believe the difference in Martin ... clean shaven and he looks like he has a baby face! Absolutely brilliant!

As far as I remember, it had been the second wedding of Jane and Ian ... it had come to light to Peter and Jane that it was someone in the family who had murdered Lucy. Lauren had given Jane a card to say that Lucy had been killed inside the house, but how and why? I re-watch this now and can't believe how brilliant the acting is considering it's live! Adam Woodyatt and Laurie Brett in particular are fantastic! So there look to be different things going on, Stacey realising that Dot knew Nick was staying in house and also mystery of who killed Lucy. Questions are being thrown from different directions, Ian is sat on the couch taking every bit of information in, it seems the Beale family believe Denise may have something to do with Lucy's death, as she was living at the property at the time. Ian leaves to go and find Denise but then he gets distracted by Martin asking him for help regarding Dot.

There's so much to take in, I can't quite remember what was happening with previous characters, Mick being aware of Dean's return, and then we see Lauren be sick in the sink while Abi looks over her. Also the difference in Sharon then as she is now! Much more glamours with the long blonde hair and face full of make-up! We know what is to be revealed at the end of this episode, but for quite a few weeks Phil had been playing up, keeping secrets and having his phone ring constantly by an unknown caller! What the heck had Phil been up to? Also it looks as if Kim is pregnant with Pearl in this episode and if I remember rightly, she gives birth to her in the Queen Vic toilet with Denise at her side! I am thrilled to hear that Kim will be making a comeback when the soap returns later in the year, it's been so long since we've seen Kim. But her comeback will be one of the best, she's a character who brings such light onto the soap!

I thought it was really clever when Peter entered the Vic, everyone asking him genuine concerned questions. Asking if he was alright, where Jane and Ian were? You could see that everywhere he turned, he couldn't help but think one of those people had potentially killed his twin sister, and with everyone asking how he was, he had to get out of there! Wow, so many moments where you question if it was a specific character who killed Lucy. When Ian and Sharon were around at Dot's making sure she was okay, she explains to them both how she let Nick kill himself and carried on without saying a word to anyone and how can live in peace now she was able to tell someone. Ian's face looks as if he's worked out who killed Lucy, but also looks as if he understands that someone keeping a secret to protect someone that they love is important.

Then the scene after where Jane is on the phone to Masood is another brilliant scene! We know that Jane and Masood did have a thing for one another a while ago, whether or not it was before all this Lucy story kicked off, Masood does care for Jane ... as a dear friend, and maybe just that little bit more. But he knows something isn't right, he's convinced Ian has done something, but Jane won't tell him. I remember watching this thinking, "She has told Masood to tell Bobby that everything is going to be alright, plus she is looking so guilty when she doesn't respond to Masood, but yet also, that could just be because she knew Ian was on a mission for answers from Denise!" .... so it was a difficult one to say whether Jane knew something or not, I love how much this soap made us change our minds over and over again to who the actual killer was!

Also Denise plays a huge part in this story-line, she was living with Ian during the time Lucy was killed and this particular episode, it looks as if Ian and Denise went their separate ways and at the very beginning of the episode, she made a comment about Jane and how she almost didn't say "I do!" to marrying Ian. Denise is clearly heated up about something and taking it out on Kim! I loved that moment when Kim is in labour in the toilets and Denise goes in to apologise for slagging her off earlier, only to realise her sister is in labour and the first thing she says is "You're not due for another two months!" ... like it's her fault! Haha! Typical sisterly love right there! I also think it's brilliant when she runs out to get help from Sonia, and she is covered in cake after being insulted by Kat ... Sonia tells Denise abruptly "If she's ill i'm off duty!" for then Denise to say "She's not ill!" and suddenly it clicks, both Sonia and Tina follow Denise into the girl's toilets.

I love how there are so many people in the one room at Dot's house, talking about how they're all going to keep Nick's death a secret. It's true that each and every one of them in that room care about Dot and none of them are willing to let her get in trouble with the police, I believe so far, it's the best kept secret in the square, it's true that Nick's death has never been mentioned since!! Does anyone remember what's happening with Kat during all of this? She makes a show of herself in the Vic, assaults Sonia and then she's weeping to Stacey on the bench, saying she tried so hard ... has this got something to do with Alfie? As we see, before she kicks off on Sonia, she goes to head towards Alfie in the Vic, but Sonia comes in her way. Was this the time they briefly broke up? Was this during the time Alfie was engaged to Roxy? If anyone can remember, please let me know! I do feel for Kat sometimes, I love since she's been in the square, we've learnt so much about her past and her character. To me, Kat and Alfie have always been the iconic EastEnders couple ... before Mick and Linda! I always thought Kat and Alfie would be together forever, they were literally soul mates ... and for some horrible reason, they keep falling apart and getting back together months later!

Did anyone else see the episode of Secrets From The Square last Monday (20th July 2020) of Diane Parish and Tameka Empson? I loved how they described Tameka filming that childbirth scene during the live episode, Tameka was hilarious how she explained it. They'd count down from 5 until they were due to go live and she'd leap into the sounds of labour and then stop and relax as if nothing had happened seconds later! I thought it was brilliant! You can see in these live clips how everyone's performance is shining through! Now, we see Dean has creeped into the Vic ... what is doing back in the Square? I'm assuming he has already raped Linda before this, which is why Mick is wanting to keep Linda unaware of Dean's presence being back in the square. Dean takes out what appears to be a petrol can, from a bag ... your mind suddenly races, is he going to threaten to set the Vic alight?!

Okay, so if i'm right in thinking ... the moment when you see Ian walking towards his house, alone in the street and Mick calls to him to come back into the Vic to celebrate his wedding. Is it the moment where Ian knows something? He knows that someone in his household killed his daughter! Hense why he asked the question to Mick, "Have you ever killed someone?" "How long can you hide it until you crack?" I believe that was the moment everyone kinda thought "Hold on!" Ian knows! Is he about to confront the person who killed Lucy?" It's a bit of an awkward conversation for Mick, but it's amazing to see how Ian knows who it potentially could be! Even Mick clicks "You know don't you? You know who killed Lucy?" I remember thinking "Oh shit!" Hahaha!

Awwwww early stages of Martin and Stacey!!! Martin leaning in to give her a kiss and she backs away, clearly he hasn't been back on the Square long! It's incredible to think how far they've both come within the past 5 years! Awwww and there we have it, Pearl being brought into the soap, I remember panicking thinking the poor child hadn't made it when everyone was silent, and then there comes the babies cry and everyone is celebrating! It's amazing how many different emotions have happened in this episode, a birth and the revelation of a death! Simply amazing! I also want to point out that Patrick is slurring his words, this would've been his slow recovery from the stroke he had! I remember worrying thinking Patrick wasn't going to survive, but I am thrilled he has been on the soap for so long! I don't think the Square would be anything without Patrick!

Ahhh so this is a very memorable moment, we see Phil is waiting for someone, looking at his phone in a deserted area and decides to head off, but before he leaves a taxi pulls up! I remember thinking who the hell is he meeting up with? Most guessed it might've been Grant or Lisa?! But Oh My Goodness no one expected it to be Kathy!!!!! What an iconic memorable moment, and in such EastEnders style, slowly walk up and those words "Hello Phil!" ... I realise now that the next two people you see after Kathy being revealed is Ben in the pub with Jay, and then Ian on the swings ... how amazing that editing is!!! Kathy arrives back to Walford and both her sons are shown not having the foggiest idea that she's back!!! Brilliant! I can't applaud the writers enough, I just thought it was so so clever!!

Another face no longer in the soap is Vincent, and yet when Kim is being taken to the hospital with her new born baby, he looks on from afar ... it's sad that Denise and Kim have this fall out. If only Kim had known Vincent was there! I still think he should've made himself known and then Denise would've swallowed her words and Kim would've had someone with her when she went to the hospital. But of course Denise never meant to hurt Kim's feelings, as we have seen in recent years Denise loves little Pearl and she has become a beautiful child on the Square.

Ah okay, so Kathy was begging Phil to let her come home, am I right in thinking that he had known for a while that Kathy was alive? This secretive behaviour with Phil had been happening for quite some time, and it wasn't completely known what he was getting up to. It's amazing to have such an iconic character return on such an epic episode! At first Phil refuses to let Kathy come back as it would mess up Ben and Ian's heads, but before she leaves, she begs him to let her return! Next minute Peter is approaching Denise claiming that it was her, even calling her a bitch! Denise has absolutely no idea what is going on, luckily Ian interferes before anything kicks off and basically states to Peter that he has got it wrong and leads Peter away. It's not going to be long now until the killer is revealed!

Oh gosh, Nancy walks into the cellar after also smelling something dodgy, she walks in a Dean grabs her from behind. She shouts out to her Dad and Mick walks in to find Dean holding on to his daughter. They tell him not to even think about setting the Vic alight, Dean decides to let Nancy go as his argument isn't with her, he states all he wants is the Vic. I remember watching this on the edge of my seat. Does anyone remember what Dean was like before he became a rapist? Before he returned! He was a bit of a teenager and everyone seemed to fancy him, perhaps a little bit off the rails but nowhere near as bad as he was now, he had become such a brilliant villain and to be honest, I found it incredible to watch! How had he been transformed into such a hated character?! Brilliant script writing! Mick and Dean are both talking, Dean claiming that he's not a rapist and what Linda had said was all lies, Mick doesn't believe a word and grabs a fire extinguisher from behind him. Nancy informs Dean that Shriley, Dean's Mum, is in the Vic with everyone else ... this briefly distracts Dean and Mick takes his chance and goes for Dean with the extinguisher, forcing the lighter out of his hand, only to then knock him backwards, onto the floor and step on his throat, almost choking Dean. Nancy drags her Dad away as Dean lies there lifeless, I remember thinking, "Oh crap! Has he just killed Dean?!"

Oh how sad! Dot being sat in the back of a police car and saying goodbye to her son. That was a moment I think everyone didn't expect to see. She didn't kill her son, not really. She just didn't help him. There is a difference isn't there? Dot had gone through years of abuse from her son, it was about time he got his comeuppance. Even though she was his Mum, she loved him dearly and she would've done anything to support him, even if he was in the wrong. She was only doing what was right as a mother, everyone knows that! I can't recall much of Dot's story-line, but I'm sure she wasn't in jail ... and even if she was, she wasn't for long.

Oooooh I remember this! Everyone in the Beale household approaches the phone as it rings, but before anyone can answer it, it goes to Ian in the cafe. "It's me ... I know it was you who killed Lucy. Get everyone out of the house. I'm coming home!" .... WHO WAS HE SPEAKING TO????? I remember shaking, i'm shaking now reliving it! Everyone was desperate to know who it was! Peter, Jane or Cindy? They are the only possible 3 people it could've been!!!! We see Ian walk into the house on his own, no one in sight until we hear footsteps coming down the stairs, Ian picks up a picture frame of Lucy, turns around and says "Tell me exactly what happened that night!" ... to JANE!!!! I remember gasping! I didn't think at all it would've been Jane, I didn't quite believe it to begin with, but as we know, the next episode revealed that she was covering for Bobby. Bobby was the one who actually killed Lucy. Jane would've done anything to save her son from being in trouble with the police. I just remember being gobsmacked ... for 10 months we had no idea who had killed Lucy and for it to be all unravelled the way it was, was absolutely brilliant! Am I right in thinking that it was 2 live episodes that covered the reveal? What an epic way to celebrate an anniversary!

I loved these episodes so much and I'm thrilled that the reveal of Who Killed Lucy was chosen as an iconic episode, because it really was iconic! The reveal of a death, a birth, a return from the dead ... it had everything! We have just had the 35th Anniversary, I know it's a way off yet, but I can't wait to see what big plans they come up with for the 40th Anniversary! If it was anything as big as this then i'm certain it'll be epic! I've loved seeing the cast all the way through this episode and seeing what they were like back then, it's sad seeing characters who are now no longer in the soap ... Abi, Lauren, Tanya, Dot, Nancy, Lee, Dean, Fatboy, Christian, Carol, Vincent ... it's wonderful to see all these familiar faces! It makes me sad that some of these brilliant actors and actresses aren't in it anymore! I would love to see so many of them come back, wouldn’t you? Out of the ones I have mentioned, who would you like to see return to Albert Square? Please feel free to message me, I’ll always reply to your comments! I believe the next iconic episode to be shown will be the Christmas episode of Max and Stacey's affair being revealed, another brilliantly written episode! I can't wait to write up about that one!

I hope you've all enjoyed this post, I can only apologise on how late it is. I'll be back with the follow up post of the iconic episodes very soon! Thanks again everyone, look after yourselves xXx

#eastenders #iconic episode #lucybeale #whokilledlucy #ianbeale #janebeale #denisefox #kimfox #philmitchell #kathybeale #mickcarter #deancarter #dotbranning #nickcotton #martinfowler #staceyslater

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