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hei-ch0u · 3 years

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It’s long...(fair warning) ✰

Shingeki no Kyojin 139 (Theories)

Since everyone is throwing around their theories from the wild to the more likely, I thought I should contribute. After all, it will be the last time we can theorise this amazing manga full of all its twists and turns. Like most, I do agree with the popular fan theories simply because this manga is consistently unpredictable with each chapter. Let’s face it, some stories are easily picked apart these days and finding one that continuously has you thinking about what could occur is a winning tale. So first, I will start off by saying that I am so sad that Shingeki no Kyojin is coming to an end. But! I will never forget this amazing manga as I have grown so attached to the characters and the story as you can tell from the past nearly 9 years of running this blog. So, thank you yams for being such a genius! Regardless of the ending, it will go down in history as one of the best stories I personally have ever read and witnessed.

With typical fan theories, I won’t go into them too much as I feel the concept of the “time loop” has been written about to filth and I think it is very blatantly clear at this point that the concept of a time loop is very likely in one way or another given the overall concept within aot/snk in general - there is a obvious manipulation of past, present and future. I will hold my hands up and say that I definitely do agree with ‘some’ popular fan theories and will list a fair few below in brief detail - as I do think they are highly likely to be true in some way or at least implied within the last chapter. Now, with the usual leak dates coming up on the horizon, I wanted to put my input in before hand. Although, because of recent prosecution warnings for leaking the final chapter - I would advise others just to wait for the 9th of April on official release for concrete facts rather than speculations and leaks simply because we have seen with past few chapters that a lot of false spoilers get released and I think with the final chapter it would be wise to wait as I have previously stated on here that it will be the ‘revelation’ chapter that ties this manga together.

So! With the typical fan theories, we see the likes of:

Eren being the baby daddy to Historia’s baby

Eren sacrificing his reason for living - freedom. By being the greater evil to bring about the greater good

The baby itself could become the new beast titan or baby Eren/Ymir reborn

Eren isn’t dead, but on Paradis by way of transferring his subconscious into a crystallised version of himself

Eren and Ymir have struck a deal

And of course - the time loop concept

…The list is endless of popular fan theories. It would be silly not to agree with any of them given the story and where we are currently at, its very clear that Historia, Eren and Ymir will play a big part somehow in the final chapter (if not id be genuinely shocked) since majority of the past few chapters they have been absent in full form and I feel this needs to be explained. After all we still haven’t seen the full extent of the memories of past/future that Eren was aware of from his contact with Historia and his connection with Ymir in Paths. We saw 137 being predominantly Armin based, 138 being Mikasa based and I think it is only reasonable given his absence as the initial protagonist that Eren will be the revelation within 139. Ultimately culminating EMA / the trio as a whole. We began with them, so it only makes sense to end with them (albeit separately as individuals).

Moving on, as you can see I agree with said fan theories as I think any route could be possible! The thing with Shingeki no Kyojin is that it has many hidden ‘Easter eggs’ (how fitting given its easter), whether it be in the background of scenes, characters wording, placement of scenes/characters, flashbacks, paths and even in the opening and ending credits of the anime we see hidden meanings through imagery. It has all been laid out very well for our finding, its just if we have an intuitive enough imagination to pick it apart and figure things out. This leads on to my own theory/theories (it can go any way and I wont sugarcoat it - I could be reaching)

I generally have 2 theories that run about in my head with how the story itself could turn out or how it works. Both theories kind of tie together in one way or another featuring predominantly Eren and then Mikasa or overall ‘Ackerman’ blood/gene concept and its potential involvement in control of said time loop. I will do my best to include manga panels to give visual insight to the points.

To begin, I want to touch on Mikasa's “dream” in 138 - although devastating, I think it is being taken as the opposite of what it was and personally I see many looking at it through rose tinted glasses. This wasn’t an alternative universe (in my opinion), this was Mikasa’s Ideal life - her dream. When it comes to Eren as a connection to Mikasa, he is her reason for being, even in death she chooses not to part with him for her own good and creates a dreamlike reality for herself to make herself go through with the deed. She as a character has dominantly surrounded her existence on Eren, he is categorised many times within the manga as ‘home’ - like other fan theories have stated, it has been mentioned many times Mikasa referencing the word ‘home’ and also how she wants to ‘be close to him’ because it gives her comfort and strength. The Ackermans as a whole have attachments to people and this is where they ultimately gain strength from. Without any of the Ackermans ‘attachments’ being in danger or being killed, their powers wouldn’t be awakened and without them I feel their strength almost weakens until they find a new reason for living to keep moving forward. I’ll touch more on the ‘Ackerman’ theory later as its one of the open loopholes still currently alive within the manga.

Mikasa has always been a character that confuses me, particularly with the way she acts and things she says or thinks. She has said many things that don’t make sense unless she has a certain belief system or knows of things from past lives.

Examples:

As you can see and I will produce more evidence of such comments further in. She implies that she either believes in reincarnation or she is aware of different periods within the said time loop. She speaks of starting over, being dead and returning and implies in different ways that she is scared of the same thing happening again. The last panel - what plan is she on about here? Her own plan. In my opinion it is - "Don't let Eren die". As we have seen, that may be what has to happen. It's fate. She interferes with this and never lets him go.

Mikasa does have an unhealthy bond with Eren, I do think he loves her ( I’m not dismissing that ) but do I think its the type of intense love she feels? no. Some things she has came out with has even shocked other characters and countless times her comrades have tried to ‘break the barrier’ to get her to realise her way of thinking when it comes to Eren is unhealthy. Hence why I think we seen Jean in this particular scene below so frustrated

not because he himself has feelings for her, but because she’s not letting them get through to her that she is refusing to believe Eren could ultimately be a changed person (which he definitely is, I’ll not go into my rant of why he isn’t ‘evil or a ‘monster’ because i’ve done so already) but overall, Mikasa constantly makes excuses for Eren and doesn’t recognise it, her life revolves around being close to Eren and she gets very emotionally troubled at the idea of not being with him or him ultimately taking a path that doesn’t involve her. We even seen Annie question her and this wasn't many chapters ago and she replies with the same mindset of bringing back "the old Eren". He is not the person he once was particularly as a child. Something that is implied at beginning of manga, it opens with them as children and somehow links with 138.

As stated by Armin below we see him even explaining to Mikasa that Eren’s never close, he always takes his own route and that ultimately both Armin and Mikasa aren’t his reason for living. Let’s face it - Freedom is Eren’s reason for being, his only desire. Armin has also expressed disbelief and almost frustration at her way of thinking when it comes to him (below examples) I think in a way the famed ‘table scene’ was Eren trying to break the bond, but he’s not doing that for no reason, its implied he does it to protect them, but it could also be because of what he has seen in memories past and future - he has perhaps became aware of Mikasa’s involvement within paths and the loop. He has to try to alter her way of thinking to protect her, but maybe also himself.

Armin + Other comrades reactions to Mikasa’s mindset

Another visual point to make regarding Mikasa’s ties with previous loops and Armin, was her comment made about him at a very early stage in the manga just after Eren had been eaten by a titan after saving Armin - leaving his fate at this point unknown.

this is implying that Mikasa has some knowledge of previous times Armin has helped them with his ‘ability’ which if we are referencing him as a character is his methodical intelligence. But, even here he is confused by the comment, simply because at this point there has been no signs of Armin’s usage of this ability - mainly fear and lack of confidence with that in comparison of his peers. We don’t necessarily see this until perhaps even a chapter later and as far as we are aware, Mikasa doesn't follow through with “i’ll tell you about it later”.

I don’t know about anyone else, but it seems odd she has such an attachment to Eren like this that is so intense. It’s not normal to be as intense as she is about someone unless she is used to losing that person over and over. Even as children Mikasa acted possessive over the ‘concept’ of Eren dying - it wasn’t allowed to happen. She doesn’t have this intense reaction with Armin or other comrades. She fixates on the idea of Eren being her saviour, the one to give her a ‘home’ and a ‘purpose’. Mikasa consistently opposes his death and his death alone, I can only see this from a standpoint that deep within her own memory she has experienced his death countless times before. She even uses force a couple of times to increase this intensity. Here are some examples of this even in childhood -

There are many more examples of this throughout the manga and her refusal to accept that what she doesn’t want, may just happen. Now this might just be my over active imagination or my own ability of media studies kicking in. But, previously I had been under the impression in the presence of a time loop that Eren was in charge of it and controlling it, that somehow it would constantly reoccur when he himself died and he would have to come up with a way to either prevent his death or ultimately stop the timeline of the titans. Whether that be under making a deal with Ymir herself or by essentially “breaking the wheel” and turning others against him to show Eldians as triumphant heroes.

However, the more i’ve thought about it and given the revelations of 138 - i would be more inclined to say it is Mikasa Ackerman herself due to either her specifically or her Ackerman gene. There is something about the bloodline that is missing and we have not had the fabled Ackertalk or much explanation of how they work (something I’d like to see covered in 139 - although i feel it will be an Eren chapter, I also think it will include the visions Eren has seen to give an explanation of why the previous 138 chapters played out the way they did)

I think there is a possibility Eren had to break the wheel on the loop, Mikasa would go back each time and always Eren would die, something we’ve established she tries to prevent and never accepts. The only escape was her accepting his death therefore he did everything he could to push her away, break the bond and push her to kill him to end the cycle (since he’s seen the future). As I have a hunch previously in other loops he was not killed by her hand - it had to be her to break the cycle or vice versa (but we will get to this).

there is hints of this in the “Lost Girls” OVA. Yes, I am aware it’s said that OVAS are not necessarily canon per say, but I don’t think it would have so many open links if Isayama himself didn't want it to. This particular one gives many hints to Mikasa’s involvement in the loop and alternative universe theories. The anime adaptations are on point with showing us details we only recognise after more plot points are revealed. It may explain the headaches, every time Eren dies, she reverses the loop or changes realities. This ailment could be a product of her memory issues. In the OVA we see Mikasa in real time thinking about Eren and his constant state of taking his own path.

After this moment, the said “Scene” she speaks of is revealed to us. Another example of Mikasa’s dreamlike state or perhaps another timeline? We are taken back to the time where she had given up, had ran out of gas, a titan was approaching and she was ‘lost’ - her reason for being was gone and she knew her death was coming, but also in the manga during this scene she is “worried” she’ll have to start again (above in examples). This again implies she knows something we don’t. We then hear Mikasa’s voice speaking to Mikasa herself, telling her that if she simply didn’t like this reality she could choose the place she wanted, but as we have seen before - she can’t stop his death.

The peculiar scene in this OVA that got me intrigued by this theory is the masked figure and young mikasa scene. Mikasa is rushing to meet with Eren and Armin to escape the walls in a hot air balloon, but she has to be there by a certain time or the plan fails. As she is running she is stopped by a mysterious masked figure who asks her to join in on his hypnotism trick to spectators. Comments he makes involve him telling her that her ‘friend’ will ultimately leave her and that she couldn’t accept his death and created this universe. Also, that he is no one, but someone at the same time. I think this holds great significance since the strange thing about this is that his voice mirages into a distant adult Mikasa.

implying that she has to ‘kill’ a part of herself or she has to die to prevent and hault the loop. She has to return from her idealistic dreams of keeping him alive as it will only fail otherwise. Upon hearing of Eren’s yet again untimely death within this universe, she begins to have memory flashes of multiple scenes appearing within her eyes with a typical media ‘rewind’ sound as she wakes up back in the street with no gas and a titan approaching but... she says something I find interesting and links to what Eren says at the beginning of the manga

“the feeling I’ve had a really long dream”

We witness Mikasa have these “headaches” multiple times within the manga and in the anime they are heavily focused on whenever it happens, which we can only recognise that this is an important part of the story itself. Eren too has random headaches, just not as much as Mikasa, he mainly experiences them when he accesses new memories. However, what if Mikasa too is affected by memories she cannot tap into or it is paths/ackerman gene warning her she is repeating past mistakes?

Notice how there is a lot of emphasis on the word ‘again’ when it comes to her headaches or the thought of losing Eren. It is constantly repeated. I think it is highly likely she only remembers some parts from previous loops, but the one that sticks is simply - she has to save Eren each time, but fails. Everything begins again after his or her’s demise. Perhaps each time Eren is the one who dies first, creating a somewhat butterfly effect. That maybe Mikasa has died once like she implies in previous example. However, the one to die first (in this case primarily Eren) loses all memories of the past loops - again this is implied as Eren does tell Mikasa he cannot remember his dream. I think deep within his mind Mikasa does remember, but given the fact she has potentially reversed the outcome many times...her memory is simply warped - that or she died in the previous loop and lost those components.

Will she not remember due to her memories being altered in her death?

Either way something needs to change. Eren Kruger says this in Eren’s attack titan memories. They are doing something wrong.

I believe Eren in 138 within Mikasa’s dream, was trying to tell her to move on, not necessarily forget him, but at least accept his passing - to stop the loop reoccurring, he influenced part of her reality...maybe with the help of Ymir. In a way it could be implied Eren almost regrets wrapping the scarf around her (this is heavily emphasised as a symbol of their relationship), for me the scarf seems like a softer symbolism for a chain - a binding if you will. By wrapping it round Mikasa he binds her to him. He has always insisted she should throw it away, even in 138 within her own conjured reality he says the same. She needs to kill this part of herself or “the same history” will be repeated. I do have a HUGE feeling in my heart, head and gut that Mikasa may need to end up dead first as I do have another HUGE feeling that Eren is not dead (maybe its wishful thinking, but his death doesn’t make sense right now, so Yams I trust in you for explanation). His death seemed too convenient.

Now, before I go onto “Ackerman” gene factors, I’ll briefly bring in another peculiarity I have always had about a particular scene in the beginning of the manga. After it is decided Eren will carry the boulder to plug the wall, Eren (the attack titan) seemingly loses control and succumbs to pure rage, in turn he attacks Mikasa. Something he hasn’t done against humans unless its free will.

However, a part of me has always felt that this could be the attack titan itself (in past inhabitants and memories) recognising her as a threat and trying to rid her of the world first to avoid the loop of Eren dying first to Mikasa controlling the loop to return to try to save Eren - nothing changes. This is what I meant by “breaking the wheel”, we have saw it in other tales, things can’t change unless you choose a different path than the same one with the same brutal cycle. As Kruger says, to save Mikasa and Armin, Eren has to change things - this could be to separate not only Armin, but Mikasa from him, that maybe in previous loops...they follow him. In this instance, he has definitely separated Armin and by way of second hand - Mikasa too. Hence why Ymir says goodbye to Eren in 138, he is free. Another notable concept is that aot/snk is made up of trios, we see it in:

Eren / Mikasa / Armin

Reiner / Bertholdt / Annie

Connie / Jean / Sasha

Hanji / Erwin / Levi

Levi / Farlan / Isabel

Kenny / Levi / Mikasa

It would partially make sense for the trio to be the reasoning for the ending. Almost illuminati based - very yams style.

Why not Mikasa?

Lets talk Ackerman and a slightly different theory, but with relation!

(Obviously, I cannot provide much evidence to support any Ackerman based theories other than what has already been provided, which isn’t a lot to be fair. Dammit Yams)

I want to briefly start off on the Ackerman front with a brief comparison of our two currently known Ackermans: Levi and Mikasa. The main categorising difference between these two is that Levi moves on regardless of what happens to him or his comrades or his ‘attachments’. He also does not appear to experience these headaches, some say he does, but I can’t find evidence. Isayama shows these headaches with a throbbing sign around Mikasa’s head - so unless the Ackertalk happens and Levi confirms it, its still absent in theory. Levi treats Ackerman-ism as moving on, making choices with no regrets (as his backstory indicates) and even in current states he has said he doesn’t regret his decisions. It is why he is able to move forward and keep surviving. Its simple...his mindset is stronger than Mikasa's, she is the weaker link. This could be due to age difference and overall past experience, Levi has more life experience as an Ackerman to have mastered his emotion and reactions to outcomes - he accepts the bad.

Mikasa is weaker in this regard, perhaps if you link it back to the theory of her control of the loop...due to this weakness she creates the loop since she can’t accept his death and tries to return to make amends. I think in reality, Eren knows due to the attack titan ability - he will die. Hence why he appeared so shocked upon making contact with Historia to then very depressed and detached before vanishing in Marley. He became aware of the outcome and I don’t know about anyone else, but I’d be depressed too after finding out my life was made to end especially since all he wanted as a character was Freedom. Eren x Freedom will be the only canon ship at this rate.

However, I do think the only way she can create said loop is through her Ackerman gene. Ackermans are products of ‘titan science’, they were genetically engineered (if you want to put it that way) to have titan like abilities while still maintaining their human form and sense of self being. Created to protect the Fritz family (royal blood), to eventually being ostracised for their dismissal of the plan to wipe Eldian’s memories. Therefore banished, but allowed to live, I can only see there being one reason why - they would be still useful at some point and their deaths/extinction would be wasteful.

From what we know and can tell from mere viewing, the Ackermans are very skilled and powerful beings that have ‘hosts’ or attachments (I like this name better) to channel their goals, strength and energy into. They were made to protect, fight and survive. The only surviving Ackermans are Levi and Mikasa.

They cannot be affected by the founding titan and their memories cannot be altered. But, this brings about another question. Why were they created to protect the founding titan, yet could not be controlled by it? The theory with this bloodline is that they can do more than what we see, that they themselves don’t know it yet. One in particular can alter realities - that being Mikasa (as we don’t have mass amounts of information on Levi’s experiences other than his surge of power awakenings demonstrated throughout the manga to confirm his part) due to fact Levi really only knew he was an Ackerman within his 30′s after the previous Ackerman - Kenny, dies and informs him of this. Mikasa has always been aware.

Mikasa’s ‘Power’ ultimately has something to do with the Attack Titan and the Founding titan - that being Eren and Ymir combined. In past loops, I believe each time she has seen Eren die she has said “see you later, Eren”... hence the ending of 138 and the beginning of the manga. Isayama did say the beginning would relate to the ending. Each time this happens they are transcended to the point Eren wakes up at the tree within the walls to begin once more, its the only clear explanation for why Eren comments of her hair length. The attack titan itself is the component of Ymir that captivates her freedom, it continues to move forward for 2000 years each successor until one has the power (the desire for freedom like her) to release her from enslavement to the power of the titans. In this instance Eren too has been a slave to the power, lets for arguments sake blame Grisha for passing it on to him.

Again, with the Ackermans there is something I’ve always noticed between Levi and Mikasa - they have never touched skin to skin. It has always been over their clothing. I wonder if their Ackerman powers may stem similar to how Eren draws memories from contact with the royal family, i.e. Historia. They need to touch in order to access Paths and manifest it into their control. Eren is aware of this due to his connection to Ymir - there is heavy implied material to denote the idea of Ragnarok and reincarnation. Eren is the reincarnate of Ymir and previously I don’t think they were aware of this.

For anyone not familiar with the term “Ragnorok” - its definition has multiple meanings in Norse mythology. Particularly - development, origin, cause, relation and fate. It is a series of events that often lead to a great battle, the deaths of multiple people of importance to the ultimate end revelation of the world being remade and fertile (the opposite of Zeke’s plan) with the remaining ‘gods’ returning and ‘two’ human survivors repopulating the world. I personally believe this to be either two of these: Levi and Mikasa or Eren and Historia by the way of Ymir as the ultimate god, but just in different ways. The Ragnorok element is particularly of importance within Germanic studies, this would connect with Shingeki no Kyojin since it is implied its set in early germany/europe and given characters name origins - it makes sense.

The two human survivors are that of Lif and Lifbrasir (shown below) who survive by ‘hiding’ in the woods while the great battle commences.

They repopulate the world starting with a daughter. In germanic regions, the concept of mankind originated from trees is an ancient notion “the tree of life” essentially. Trees have a massive importance and connection in Shingeki no Kyojin, we see Eren wake up at one in the beginning, the main Path coordinate resembles a tree, Ymir originated from trees and being within the woods would indicate “trees”. This would make me more inclined to believe the Eren and Historia theory to be likely, simply because Historia is all the way back in Paradis and potentially Eren himself by transferring subconscious. To me it seems very likely the leaked final panel released by Yams himself is Eren holding a child rather than anyone else as whoever this figure is tells the child they are free and this could only relate to both Ymir and Eren, the ones who sought freedom. This could mean in this instance Levi and Mikasa are the ‘gods’, the ones with the power to restore and mend, again through the concept of the Ackerman Gene being more than what meets the eye. Ymir will be reborn ultimately and no longer enslaved as will Eren.

Ragnarok and Shingeki no Kyojin combined have connotations of ‘fate’ being a big part of their depths. It is fated. Everything is. Just like Eren’s death and potentially ability to be reborn into another timeline. Just like Eren’s fate to obtain the founding titan and attack titan, both very powerful titans in the manipulation of time and events. Eren makes a statement around chapter 123 in Paths when talking with Zeke that if someone tried to take his freedom, no matter who, he would remove theirs. That he has been like that since birth because he was “born into this world”.

Zeke: “Since birth?”

this further implies fate. He was born free, he expresses detest for people who aren’t free and bound by something, 2000 years, Ymir etc. This only ties together if Eren himself in past lives was someone with the same views and personality traits, like Mikasa, except hers are the opposite. Paths has always been there and everything that has happened in the past is imbedded within its clutches through Ymir. These two titans needed to be combined, Grisha was informed by Eren himself through Kruger and future versions of himself that he had to obtain the founder or nothing could be changed. Grisha is even seen asking Eren to show him everything that happens, whether carla dies etc. He did not have full control, this was made for Eren’s inhabitant period and he did not have access to all memories due to only being able to access the ones the future successor sends back in time. Like the mirror scene for example, Eren is speaking to someone else, not himself. Grisha was only instructed to go within the walls and have a family. Eren was instructed to save everyone. Remember that the common rule with time is that you cannot change the past or it significantly alters the future.

I believe all the memories (the ones we are seeing even now) are actually in paths, the story has always had an indication it is being ‘narrated’ by someone - in most instances this is Armin. This has implied he will survive into the future, but that others may not. How this will happen...I can only theorise that Ymir will factor into who lives or dies. She will need to leave paths however, the only way the titan curse will end is if she leaves and no one is there to build titans. She will be either reborn to capture her freedom or reborn through Eren for them both to obtain the same dream. There has been multiple theories that some other titan other than the attack titan could be the key or another character, like that of the Ackermans or armin for example as I do think the trio concept is likely. But, remember the manga is called “Shingeki no Kyojin” meaning “the attack titan” - its always been the key and Eren is that key...again, key? Eren. scarf? Mikasa. Equals symbolism.

At the end of the day, the characters who I feel personally will tie together the ending are Eren, Ymir, Historia and Levi, Mikasa, Armin - both trios on different sides of the coin. Just remember, this isn’t the type of story where the characters get what they desire and that they could die without obtaining these desires. Erwin died before learning the truth of the outside world. Hanji died. Sasha died, Niccolo lost her. Floch did not live to see Eldian rule. Levi may have killed Zeke, but what for? He killed a different version of him, not the one who murdered innocents in Shinganshina. Levi lost every attachment of his. Mikasa lost Eren. I’d be angry and sad for him, but Eren also could lose his freedom by striking a deal with Ymir for her own freedom. But! he could free the world and his friends through both Mikasa and Armin, the chain will break, the titan curse will end and he will cease to exist or be lost in Paths dormant, unlike Ymir for 2000 years. This would be a good culmination of Eren’s character, extremely heart breaking, but fitting. A character who only sought freedom for humanity. He is humanity’s hope after all. Remember, Kaji Yuki (Eren’s Japanese voice actor) expressed extreme sadness at learning Eren’s fate from Isayama. It has always been a manga that indicates a bittersweet ending, so this could also be highly likely. (Eren is my favourite character...so this guts my heart from my chest)

To conclude, these are merely my own speculation of the final events within 139 and although sad of its ending, my excitement for this final instalment knows no bounds. I can only wish for the best and I know Isayama will deliver.

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adamfoolcry · 4 years

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How the Tables Turned (One-Shot)

pairings: Reader x Hendery, Lucas(mentioned)

rating: PG-13

warnings: none just cringe inducing fluff

genre: comedy, fluff

synopsis: You are a student assistant at the library and Hendery seems to love staying in the library past open hours.

word count: 1,734

a/n: Mentioning @nctcreations in case the tags don’t work. I love Hendery he exudes so much positivity and is very thoughtful.

Everyone who is acquainted with you knows that you are good-natured and possess a calm temperament. Right now though, the way you are glaring at the back of Wong Kunhang's head makes you resemble a bull seeing red complete with steam blowing out of your nostrils. The ticking of the old clock as it counts every second passing by infuriates you as if it's its sole purpose. It is already past five in the afternoon to other high school students it isn't much of a nuisance but to you, it is life or death. You need to be out of the school premises past five and should be on the way to the cafe you work in the evenings. Being a minute late at your part-time job means that you will receive a lengthy sermon from the cafe's owner as if they will not deduct it from your salary. But here you are still at the library waiting for Wong Kunhang to go on his merry way so that you can return the book he is pretending to be reading back to its respective shelf. Honestly, you would have let this pass but it's as if he is doing this on purpose for the past seven days. Adding salt to the wound, for every single day he takes a different book bringing it to his desk leafing through the pages eyes unfocused. Making you conclude that he is not doing any reading at all but just drops by the library to spite you. Each time before he leaves he will try to approach the desk where you are situated at and as if changing his mind in a millisecond he always makes a hasty retreat, exiting rather abruptly. You have reached your threshold and decided that you are going to confront him, for whatever his game is this got to stop. You walked towards the desk where he is, standing from behind his seat. You cleared your throat to get his attention. He craned his head back to look at you.

"Ummm, hi"

He immediately stood up from his seat in a frantic manner and rise to his height to stand opposite you. The seat's leg scratched the concrete producing a screeching sound.

"Hi, my name's Kunhang you can also call me Hendery if you like." He scratched the nape of his neck sheepishly smiling.

"I know who you are it is past five and the library closes at 5:00 PM sharp and I need to be at work -"

"I can totally take you there!" Kunhang exclaimed cutting you off. His words echoing in the empty library. You were not expecting that, the heat started blossoming on the tops of your cheeks.

"Uhhhmm, I was going to say that if you can, you know tidy up before five that would be great." You replied awkwardly.

"Ohh uhmm sure sure." You can see that he was embarrassed. He picked up the book from the desk. "I am sorry, I am gonna put this book back." You watched him as he put the book on its respective shelf and exited the library leaving you bewildered. Well, at least you got that over with.

After that incident, you no longer have to deal with him as he does not visit the library anymore. But he now occupies the other half of your brain you see him from your peripheral vision wherever you go. It seems that you are hyperaware of his presence and you can't take your eyes off him. How could you not notice before that he sits a few seats away from you at classes? By the things are going you can probably write a one-page essay about him.

He likes cats, not fond obsessed is the right word. His pencil case is imprinted with cat designs. He keeps a picture of his cats in his wallet, you know because you peeked over his shoulder at the cafeteria while he is paying for his food. He always remembers to feed the school's resident stray cat every morning. You saw him one morning bending down at the bushes near the outskirts of your school petting and feeding the stray cat.

He always hides a manga behind his textbook during classes snickering quietly so that he wouldn't be caught. Strangely enough, for someone who is not trying to do his best academically, he excels in maths and sciences and actively participates in those classes.

He likes to exchange crumpled notes with Yukhei. Maybe containing a joke or two because one time the teacher caught them they were kicked out of the class and got detention for the rest of the afternoon.

You can't deny that you are fascinated with him the same Wong Kunhang that you used to curse in your mind. You might even develop a tiny crush on him. This is why you found yourself boring holes at the back of his skull with the intensity of your gaze. Looking for minuscule details to add to your Hendery's cute and quirky habits list. Yukhei caught you in action sending you a wink and a teasing smile like he knows what's going on in your mind. He leaned down and whispered it to Kunhang.

Oh god no ...

Which made Kunhang spare you his attention looking at you with his biggest signature goofy smile. You abruptly hide your face behind your textbook and pretended that you are not gaping pathetically at his back so intently. You avoided looking at his direction for the rest of the day but you can feel Kunhang's eyes following your every move making you flustered and rendering you to something akin to tomato for the rest of the day.

You do not feel good scratch that this is the worst menstrual cramp that you have experienced in your life. Top that with the fact that your PE teacher has instructed your class to do ten laps in the field under the sweltering heat. Your peers are already ahead of you and you have long given up trying to match their pace. You stopped jogging and clutched your stomach the spasms intensifying making you double over in pain.

"Hey _______, you okay?" Kunhang kneeled at your crouched figure.

"Yeah, I am fine." As soon as you said that your abdominal muscles contracted so hard and a whimper escaped your lips.

"Let's go to the clinic you don't look so good." Kunhang reached for your forearm and slung it on his shoulders providing support to your frail figure helping you stand up. Although feeling like you might pass out any minute you can't help but observe Kunhang now that your bodies are now in close contact. His perfect side profile, tall straight nose, big doe eyes, plump pink lips, his floppy hair that frames his face, and his light perfume which smells like the sea breeze. As Kunhang led you to the clinic he started telling you about the time he collapsed due to over-exertion at one of the PE classes blaming the teacher's strenuous routine and launching on his tirade about what a pain in the ass the teacher is. You giggled finding his attempt to comfort you adorable.

"I am on my period Kunhang. The cramps are a bit on the painful side today."

"Oh ..." Hendery said embarrassed.

After dropping you off at the clinic Hendery got back to the PE class to inform the teacher about your mishap and that the nurse advised you to take the rest of the day off. You decided to rest up at the clinic and head home after the classes are over. Exiting the clinic you advanced your way to the classroom to collect your belongings when you froze on the spot upon seeing Kunhang leaning at the opposite wall to the clinic. He was carrying your bag on his shoulder. Noticing your presence he greeted you with his smile.

"I thought it'll be a hassle for you."

You can't help but smile back at him, taking your bag from him as the two of you walk towards the school gate Kunhang started bribing you to buy him ramen as payment for his good deeds.

He has this habit of looking at you but he isn't trying to hide it, in fact you think he is waiting for you to catch him because every single time you caught him redhanded he'll flash his goofy smile at you. The first few times you caught him your initial reaction was to start blushing but after the novelty of being embarrassed wears off you just shook your head smiling your eyes crinkling in mirth.

He'll always approach you and start acting cute doing silly little poses sometimes Yukhei drags him off before he starts embarrassing himself other times Yukhei will join in and start imitating Kunhang's comical poses resulting in overjoyous laughter erupting from your classmates.

He leaves you food and other trinkets on your desk. Lately after coming back from the cafeteria the ever-presence of food at your desk baffles you sometimes it contains other miscellaneous items like hair clips and ties. It was not after that your cramps manifested again that you finally knew who the culprit was for in your desk is a hot water bag. You quickly looked in the direction where you knew Kunhang was sitting, his head thrown back laughing at Yukhei's joke. As if sensing your stare he turned his face in your direction and grinned charmingly doing another of his silly poses.

It's fifteen minutes to five o clock and you need to make sure that every book is on their designated shelf and there is nothing out of its place scrutinizing the library with a sweep of your eyes you deemed that everything is in order. You grabbed your bag under the desk when the sound of the door hinges creaking got your attention. You quickly look to whoever dares to come in at the library fifteen minutes to its closing time. Surprise it was none other than Wong Kunhang. You walk up to him to stand at his opposite side, clearing your throat to get him to address you.

"Is the offer of a ride to my workplace still up?"

"Only if we go to the movies afterward."

"It's a date then."

There it is Kunhang's goofy smile. Perhaps you are too, smitten with him.

a/n: Read more of my works for NCT here:masterlist.

#nctcreations #hendery nct #hendery x reader #hendery fluff #hendery scenarios #hendery imagines #hendery wayv #nct fluff #wayv fluff #nct imagines

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xserpx · 4 years

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Battle Ground Thoughts

Major spoilers below.

The Good

I really enjoyed the last part of the fight with Ethniu. Hendrick's sacrifice was well done, and the Marcone reveal was fantastic. The action was really great, although it did get too much at times, especially the beginning of the fight with Ethniu where it’s more like reading a shonen manga, lots of huge ‘final’ attacks and mist clearing as they wait for the blood spray before someone pulls a trap card. Still pretty likeable.

Marcone as a Knight of the Blackened Denarius is intriguing. My one caveat is that I think it diminishes his post-Small Favor achievements quite a bit, knowing he had access to all that power. It makes sense, especially considering just how much Marcone was able to get done, but yeah, I liked this little twist. Marcone is probably the main reason I would keep reading the books, as things stand.

I like the fact Harry's finally been kicked off the White Council, as he should be. I'm not sure why this is controversial, though. He’s clearly broken several laws, and tbh I was kind of surprised they kept him on after becoming the Winter Knight, like... conflicted interests, much?

Drakul and the Blampires were cool. Wouldn't mind seeing them again.

The Bad

Justine's reveal, while interesting bc omg Outsiders infesting the characters we love, it also absolutely terrifies me in terms of what it actually means for Thomas/Justine both in the future and in the past. A future that might not even happen, now. And considering how long it's been since she was infected, it's entirely possible a lot of Justine's feelings have been manufactured as well. One of the things at the top of my Do Not Want list was Justine or the baby getting hurt, and now we’re here.

I'm severely disinterested in Harry/Lara. I have no idea where it's going, but it's boring at best. Maybe Jim Butcher has an idea for it that doesn’t result in me rolling my eyes, but I’m not feeling charitable today.

Ivy and Harry never got a proper conversation. Also why tf was Ivy dressed in a school uniform for that fight? Unless she's a sailor senshi or something, it just doesn't make sense. Plus she should be in her mid-late teens by now, ffs, not her early teens.

We're still drawing out the Starborn mystery? Ugh, ok.

Michael's cursing out the White Council for kicking Harry off the team... Completely OOC, sorry, I hated it. Michael is a great character because he doesn't swear as a matter of principle. If he had to start swearing, that was a bad hill to choose.

The way the morality of the White Council flip flops depending on Dresden's mood is getting annoying. At the meeting at the end, he says the Council is the biggest defender of humanity, and that he's clearly sitting at the monsters' table, but they're also supposed to be the enemy for treating him as such? Ebenezar and some of the Seniors are douchebags, for sure - especially Eb as it's personal - but Carlos and the rest are solid good guys trying to do their best. After everything that's happened, Harry shouldn't be so freaking bitter. He’s a monster now. Either own it, or make different choices. Also Carlos should’ve told him what Molly did to him. I hate that this hasn’t been addressed and that Carlos just looks like a suspicious bastard when he’s actually sustained life-changing injuries and trauma. Communication generally between Harry and the White Council needs to start happening like yesterday.

Butters needs to just go away, please. Give me a break from this shithead. He's had a few months of training and can keep up with literally everyone. He gets all these Crowning Moments of Awesome, but he never suffers for it, and at this point I'm genuinely wondering whether he'll ever suffer any consequences whatsoever. Also he constantly outshines Sanya, who is ostensibly better qualified, and the Sword of Hope should have been the stronger of the two in that last fight. I’m sick of hearing how great Butters is, and being expected to laugh at all his dumb, nerdy references.

Harry barely thinks about Thomas when he considers his recent losses. Sure Thomas is still alive, but barely, with no guarantees he'll survive or that he'll come back the same person. Harry should be grieving for him as much as he's grieving for Karrin at this point. I also wanted there to be more reason behind Thomas's actions, some sort of conspiracy within the White Court, but there wasn't. It's bad enough being anxious for Thomas, but being anxious for his whole goddamn family is just way too much, ffs.

The Ugly

I mean, I've told people: if I'd tried to imagine a worst case scenario for Karrin Murphy's death, it would have been better than the ending we got. It's worse than James Norrington dying at the hands of Bootstrap Bill. It's worse than Superman's dad dying while trying to save the dog. She shouldn't have died at all, period, but if she absolutely had to go, there is no fucking way in HELL that that was the best way for it to happen. Whether she comes back or not, there is no way to justify that scene. Gard saying she saved everyone by defending Dresden might be a satisfying Watsonian explanation for some, but of all the times, of all the places, of all the ways, and of all the people... JB picked the absolute worst possible combination. Absolute. Garbage. It's not that he can't write decent sacrifices. Hendrick's death was superb! So why the FUCK couldn't Murph get the same treatment? Why the FUCK was she killed off so FUCKING pointlessly? This isn't a real life story. This isn't some hyperrealistic, anyone can die, Game of Thrones type bullshit, where you can just kill off the second main character as shock value and have it be valuable to a bigger theme. This is the Dresden Files, a fucking series where all the women are Playboy models, and there's a middle-aged dweeby guy in sports goggles riding a skateboard and wielding a lightsaber and facing off with a Titan after just a few months of training, and having threesomes with bisexual women half his age, one of whom wears a fucking Avengers t-shirt to bed. It's a fanservice show. So it is not too much to ask for the main female character to be given the kind of death she actually deserves, let alone that she be allowed to live long enough to enjoy a relationship that's been so fantastically built up over 15+ books. (Query: was any of her family at her funeral? Audiobooks make searching hard, and I can’t find out if that was mentioned.) It's not unfair to hate the FUCK out of JB for pulling such a horrible, awful, LAZY move. I didn’t cry when it happened. I actually laughed quite a bit, maniacally, because it was that much of a train wreck. I'm not crying now, either. I'm just so, so tired. RIP Murph.

Granted, I haven't had to wait for a Dresden Files book like this before. Skin Game had a very neat ending, whereas this asks way, way, way more questions than it answers, which is probably more par for the course in this series? But now my two favourite characters are out of the field and may never come back, and I'm just so fucking tired and disappointed, and tired of being disappointed. I don't know whether it's worth staying invested in the vague hope Jim Butcher will start giving a shit about anyone other than Butters, but I can't see the next book being much good when Thomas and Karrin won't be there. When Karrin may never be there again. When I don't even know if the next book will show up, or if there'll be another hiatus resulting in a mediocre story.

I'm predicting that there'll be a Murph-centric short story in the near future that'll probably be a "gotcha!" to all the fans like me who fucking hate how BG turned out. Either it'll finish her off entirely or hint at a resurrection, which may or may not come. Either way, it won't justify her death. It won't make this better.

If I wasn’t as invested in Karrin, I’d like this book more. I can understand if people like it, and there are definitely some good things about it, but it’s hard to appreciate those bits when there’s such a massive pile of stinking shit sitting smack bang in the middle.

#dresden files #battle ground #battle ground spoilers

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recentanimenews · 5 years

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INTERVIEW: Zack Davisson on Cosmic Horror and the Reality of Translating Manga

Dark Horse recently released Gou Tanabe's excellent H.P. Lovecraft's At the Mountains of Madness manga, which features translation work by Zack Davisson. We had the fortunate opportunity to fire some questions in Zack's direction, so read on for some insight into the world of manga translation, supernatural scares, and more!

***

With Gou Tanabe adaptations like this, you're working from an English source as viewed through a Japanese author's lens. How did this affect your approach to translating At the Mountains of Madness?

Its been interesting. I work on the book with Lovecraft’s text right next to Tanabe’s. I use both an English and a Japanese version so I can see what specific phrases Tanabe intended to preserve, and what he changed. If he used Lovecraft’s language, I try to replicate that. If he wrote something entirely new, then I work to make it fit in and look seamless.

It’s a somewhat time-intensive method that I haven’t done for any other project, but I think it is worth it to get it right.

Were you already a fan of the source material?

Oh, absolutely. Looking at my shelves right now I have five complete collections of Lovecraft’s stories. I have the Arkham House editions, the S.T. Joshi annotations, and then fancy shelf decoration leather-bound volumes by Easton Press, Folio Society, and Gollancz.

I’ve been reading Lovecraft most of my life. I saw Michael Whelan’s amazing painted covers and convinced my mom to buy me the Bloodcurdling Tales of Horror and the Macabre paperback when I was probably far too young. Or maybe just the right age.

The sense of dread in Lovecraft's work can be difficult to get across in adapted form. What do you think makes Gou Tanabe's take on the material so special?

I think it is the fact that Tanabe takes the source material absolutely seriously. He approaches it with gravitas, free from modern “takes” or “spins.” In modern times Lovecraft often descends to parody or “Lovecraftian” where they do the August Derleth thing of taking his characters and writing new stories void of the original intent or nuances.

Tanabe is the visionary director who says, “Hey! I’ve got an idea! Why don’t we stage Hamlet as Hamlet? Exactly as written? Not as a clever spin on corporate culture or boy bands or something like that? Just, as intended. Even in period costume?”

Tanabe also has a grasp of mood, which is essential to Lovecraft. And pacing. And his art is simply phenomenal.

Beyond Tanabe, do you have a favorite take on Lovecraft? Are there any films or other forms of media you think have come close to capturing the essence of his horror?

Before Tanabe I would have said my favorite was Richard Corben’s comics. Although he very much made “Richard Corben comics,” his vision of Lovecraft was truly frightening on the page. No one does that grin of madness like Corben.

For films, I can’t think of a single one that does it right. I love radio plays, however, and the Dark Adventure Radio Theater does excellent adaptations. I buy everything they make.

Can you talk about your own encounters with the supernatural? How have they informed your work on titles like At the Mountains of Madness?

I hold that it is perfectly acceptable to believe in weird things so long as they are of no consequence. I have had a Loch Ness Monster sighting and gone hunting for mysterious ghost spots in Japan… Including my own house. I lived in one of Japan’s notorious jiko bukken haunted apartments.

I like the idea of there being mysteries still in the world. I think it helps to believe in the supernatural at least a little bit in order to work in the genre effectively. When I am working on things like At the Mountains of Madness, I buy into them completely and allow myself to be amazed.

What scares you more, ghosts or the notion of greater cosmic horrors?

Definitely ghosts! I love Lovecraft, but I find cosmic horror to be too grand to be truly terrifying. Horror is personal. Sitting home alone in my own house, in the dark, working away and feeling that tingling feeling on the back of my neck that someone is standing behind me will always be more frightening than mythological scale frightmares.

You've worked on plenty of titles I think it's safe to say many would consider dream projects, from the works of Go Nagai to Shigeru Mizuki, Satoshi Kon, and beyond. Do you have any favorites, and are there any specific authors or series you're still dying to tackle in the future?

It’s true. I’m fully aware I’ve been blessed in my career. I started out with a very specific agenda, of artists I wanted to work on and works I wanted to translate. When I finished Leiji Matsumoto’s Space Battleship Yamato I realized that I had accomplished them all. I had a bit of a crisis of purpose because… what then? Do I just start translating stuff I have no passion for just to cash a paycheck? That didn’t seem very fun.

Fortunately, with artists like Gou Tanabe I was able to find new passions. I’d never seen Tanabe’s work before Dark Horse hired me for The Hound and Other Stories, but now I want to work on everything he does. Discovering new favorites is the best feeling. And there are still piles of Shigeru Mizuki comics for me to tackle!

What is the most misunderstood aspect of translation?

That we are technicians instead of artists. Translating is writing. Plain and simple. I translate, and I write my own books, and they come from the same part of my brain.

Translation is like performing a cover song. My voice is never going to be the same as the original. There will be personal nuances and variations, turns of phrases that I will never be able to entirely mask. So, it’s a matter of making my cover version as good in its own right as I possibly can.

It seems it's only been in recent years that translators have been more thoroughly and visibly credited for their work. Do you think the manga industry in particular is in a good place now as far as this is concerned, or is there more to be done to convey just how much influence a translator has over the final product?

Strangely enough, the opposite is true. If you look at the early days of manga the emphasis was on the translator. People like Rachel Thorn and Toren Smith were getting cover credit. My own idea on this is that manga was still strange, so companies wanted to put “English names” on the cover to dilute some of the “foreignness.” They also were having well-known comic writers like Lein Wen and Marv Wolfman doing adaptations.

Then, when manga took off and TokyoPop boomed, things flipped. Manga artists themselves became the superstars and translators were hidden to prevent any perceived barrier between reader and artist. Readers didn’t like the idea that they were reading a translator’s dialog, not the author’s.

I think things are settling into a better equilibrium now. Manga artists SHOULD be the superstars—they absolutely are; but readers should be aware of how much the individual translator affects the experience. There still is a way to go before we get there. One of my proudest accomplishments was getting translators listed on the Eisner Awards as part of the creative team.

Now we need to get manga letterers credit.

I won't ask you to break down your personal process—you did a fantastic job of that in your TCJ article a few years back—but has it changed at all since then?

Thanks! And now, my process hasn’t changed much. Translation for me is intuitive. I absorb the original, process it emotionally, then think about how to portray those emotions in English. It's not a logical process.

Is there any advice on the industry or translation work you wish you could go back in time and tell your younger self?

Hmmm…. Start earlier. I wish I had been brave enough to have been an exchange student in high school. Knowing my interests, some of my teachers encouraged that but I was too scared to step away from friends and family and everything I knew.

It took until my 30s to say, “fuck it” and throw away everything I knew to jump on a plane to Japan. And then I didn’t get into translation until I was almost 40.

Working in comics was always a dream of mine, and it took me quite a while to find my niche. Things have worked out well, so I can’t complain too much.

Are there any manga out right now (besides your own) that you're particular excited about?

Like many who work in creative industries I find I have less and less time to just be a reader. But I always try to keep up on a few things. Recently I finally tackled the mountain that is Lone Wolf and Cub, and I am hooked. One of the best things I have ever read. Classics like that are classics for a reason.

I also wait hungrily for any new volume of Delicious in Dungeon.

Thanks for taking the time to do this, your work on At the Mountains of Madness is fantastic. Do you have any parting words for aspiring translators out there?

Thanks! My main advice is to move to Japan. I don’t think I could have the life and career now if I hadn’t taking that plunge. I spent seven years in Japan, and that gave me the skills I needed to translate professionally. Jump into the deep end! You never know what is waiting for you!

***

If you want to see a sample of Gou Tanabe's work, check out our preview pages for a peek into At the Mountains of Madness.

By: [email protected]

#Anime #News #Latest in Anime News by Crunchyroll!

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mysterylover123 · 6 years

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My Top 10 Favorite Series of All Time

Mysterylover123, to my followers.

This list, of course, could change. At some point in the future, I could always discover a new series that topples the competition - but for the moment, here they are. My top 10 favorite series of all time - mostly comics or television, but also film, and a few novel series made the honorable mentions list.

Of course, these are all just my personal favorites - that’s the key word. While I did consider objective quality when making the call, I mostly went with my gut and listed series I love for whatever reason - maybe sentimental value, pushing my personal buttons, or just characters I adored. I also made myself list the things I don’t like about the series as well, just to avoid gushing too much and remember that all but one (my #1) series out there are at least, a little, flawed, but nonetheless still lovable. With that in mind, here they are:

#10. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation (2000-2015)

Type: Live-Action TV show

Genre: Crime/Mystery; forensic drama, police procedural

Favorite character: Catherine Willows (Marg Helgenberger)

Favorite episode: “Grave Danger”, Parts 1 & 2 (Season 5 finale)

Favorite Season: 7

Favorite villain: The Miniature Killer/Natalie Davis

Bad points: Weak later seasons, forced romance subplot, copious amounts of filler

Why it’s here: CSI is nostalgic for me. I watched it during my early crime drama loving years, and found out that as much as I liked the premise, what made the show for me was the cast. That was the first time I realized how essential characters are to creating intriguing drama. CSI is still my favorite traditional crime/mystery show, since in seasons 1-8, it maintained a good balance of character drama and mystery-of-the-week. Season 7 is a high point, balancing an ongoing story with lots of fun one-offs and an emotionally explosive payoff. Later seasons, however, wear down the show’s quality for me. Too many beloved characters left and the series becomes too reliant on filler, ending with a thud that is the series finale. But the best of CSI is still enough to land it here for me.

(Just to clarify, I mean Las Vegas)

#9. Futurama (1999-2003; 2008-2013)

Type: Animated TV Show + movies

Genre: Sci Fi Dramedy

Favorite character: Philip J Fry (Billy West)

Favorite episode: “Jurassic Bark”

Favorite season: 4

Favorite villain: Bender

Bad points: Sexism, weak later seasons, bad 2nd movie

Why it’s here: Futurama came to me during a phase of depression in my life, and the show’s combination of humor and cry-your-eyes out tragedy kept me going. I’ve seen it through five times, and it’s always a blast. To me, Futurama is better than The Simpsons. Simpsons is funnier, but only for seven years or so. Following those seven years are 21 of mediocrity, whereas Futurama thankfully cuts it short. While some of the later seasons are weaker than the early Fox years, they still have quality gems and the show’s unique flavor. The series speaks to me so much; it’s a mix of hilarious comedy, serious character drama, and high sci-fi concepts that all mesh together in a unique experience. This is a series that’s not afraid to try new things, to experiment and let the characters age and grow. My personal favorite part of the series is the friendship between the core trio, Fry, Bender and Leela. Any episode starring them is a-ok by me.

Favorite memories: Binge-watching the series during a period of unemployment.

#8. Death Note (2003-2004; 2006-2007)

Type of series: Manga/Anime

Genre: Supernatural Crime Thriller

Favorite Character: L Lawliet (Alessandro Juliani)

Favorite Episode: Episode 2, “Confrontation”

Favorite Arc: The first one

Favorite villain: Light Yagami (Brad Swaile)

Bad points: Weak second half, so-so character development

Why it’s here: Death Note is a dark, twisted, engrossing thriller, which under normal circumstances shouldn’t be re-watchable. But I keep coming back to it, regardless of how many times I’ve seen it before. It’s a digestible 37 episodes and 108 chapters, for one thing. It introduced me to two characters that endlessly fascinate and frustrate my analytical brain. The antagonists, Light and L, are two of the most brilliant characters I’ve come across in fiction, and their dynamic with each other is endlessly engaging. Well, it should have been through the whole series…if not for certain incidents. But no matter; we have what we have. Flawed, yes. Terrifying, certainly. Death Note scares me like no other story. But what frightens me in DN isn’t so much there gruesome deaths, but how effortlessly it portrays the banality of evil.

Favorite memories: Watching the show during the winter holidays while on vacation, and contemplating the series during the drive home.

#7. Spider-Man (1962-)

Type: Comic book; various mediums of adaptation

Genre: Superhero

Favorite character: Mary Jane Watson

Favorite Storyline: The Night Gwen Stacy Died, #121-122

Favorite villain: The Green Goblin

Bad points: Weak later issues, lots of filler, “One More Day”

Why it’s here: Spidey is still my favorite superhero. He was me in high school (I got into Spider-Man in high school, incidentally), the everyman, the representation of my nerdy outcast struggle and need to both escapism and greater responsibility. But what really drew me to the comic, and still does, was the vast and multifaceted supporting cast. In the great eras of Spidey (Ditko, Romita, Conway, and late 1980s), the supporting cast make the series. Whether it’s Peter’s various complex lady loves, the endless cavalcade of memorable villains, supporting dude-friends like Flash and Harry or my personal favorite, mainstay Mary Jane “you just hit the jackpot” Watson, the cast of Spidey was majorly influential with good reason. The series loses it’s skill in the 1990s, thanks to the Clone Saga and general 90s comic badness, and plummets into an irretrievable black hole in 2007, never to return. But fortunately, there’s still thirty years’ worthy of fascinating comics to draw from before that insanity begins. And those stories have in turn fed fantastic adaptations, whether it be the sentimental 90s animated show, a few of the films, or the superlative Spectacular cartoon.

Favorite memories: Reading Spider-Man comics after high school, while waiting to get picked up. Also, watching the 90s show as a little kid, even if those are kinda dim.

#6. Gravity Falls (2012-2016)

Type of series: Animated TV Show

Genre: Supernatural

Favorite character: Mabel Pines (Kirsten Schaal)

Favorite season: 2

Favorite episode: “Not What he Seems”

Favorite Villain: Bill Cipher

Bad points: A few filler episodes, some odd messages, so-so ending

Why it’s here: I love a good spooky story. Gravity Falls caught my attention around Halloween in 2016, 8 months after the series finale; I binged the whole series through in a weekend. The series remains one of the all-time best I’ve ever watched. With one or two exceptions, there are no outright bad episodes. Everything is either entertaining or incredibly entertaining. The characters feel real, the messages really hit home, and the creativity on display is astounding. Gravity Falls has something in every corner - great character development, compelling drama, laugh-out-loud comedy, and a truly engaging mystery that doesn’t disappoint. I wish the franchise ran a little longer, but I’ll give it props that unlike nearly every other show on this list, Gravity Falls doesn’t over-stay its welcome. Two seasons of brilliance, wrapping up with a strong, though not perfect, finale, before the series had a chance to go on too long or burn out the creators. It’s a welcome treat to watch again, and again, and again. It’s mostly low on this list, not because of the few weak points, but because I don’t have as much emotional attachment to the series as I do to my top 5 pics.

Favorite memories: Watching the show with my dad and brother on vacation. Both of them are very surly and nit-picky, so presenting them with a show this good meant no cause to complain.

#5. Frasier (1993-2004)

Type: Live Action TV series

Genre: Sitcom

Favorite character: Niles Crane (David Hyde-Pierce)

Favorite season: 4

Favorite episode: “Something Borrowed, Something Blue”

Bad points: Weaker later/early seasons, sometimes annoying

Why it’s here: Frasier has a record for the most Emmy awards won by a single show. And rightly so, in my opinion. This is one of those series with astonishingly top-notch writing all around. It’s a sitcom that banks it’s humor on taking down pretentious snobs and prejudiced jerks; the jokes stay funny because, like all good humor, they stay relevant. This series feels kind of timeless; despite coming out in the instantly dated 90s, the characters’ fashions, mindsets, and relationships feel like they could be written today or twenty-forty years earlier. My heart belongs to the series’ ongoing love story between uptight, snippy Niles and eccentric, lovable Daphne (Jane Leeves). I have yet to see a better executed TV romance, one that pulls out all the stops like this one does. If I were to compare Frasier to anything, it would be to a Jane Austen novel. It has the same social satire, the same sardonic humor, the same understanding of romance and human psychology. That, to me, is what makes a great comedy.

Favorite memories: Discovering Frasier out of Sideshow Bob on The Simpsons - and coming to realize which of the two is truly the better comedy. (Sorry to take another potshot at Simpsons; I do like the early seasons, I just think the show is overrated).

#4. The Marvel Cinematic Universe (2008-)

Series type: Live Action films and TV

Genre: Superhero

Favorite characters: Tie: Steve Rogers (Chris Evans) and Loki (Tom Hiddleston)

Favorite film: Captain America the Winter Soldier (2014)

Favorite phase: Phase 3 (so far)

Bad points: Occasional weak/so-so film, lack of representation

Why it’s here: I first watched only a handful of MCU films; after Avengers, I gave it up and focused on other things. I loved it the first time, but when I came back and screened every picture in the lineup till the present, that is when I fell in love with the franchise. I was missing out on some of the series’ best characters. And that’s what makes the MCU special to so many people: the characterization. The series is at it’s best when it’s giving it’s multi-layered cast focus and development. Marvel comics have always been a favorite of mine, so naturally their best known adaptation is one of my favorites in general. I’ve found something to enjoy in just about every film in the franchise. The biggest surprise hit for me was the Captain America films - a part of the franchise I never dreamed I’d love, but which won me over with the stellar writing in the 2011 film, the indelible Winter Soldier, and the stunning, heartbreaking Civil War. I’m almost afraid of what will come next, as the franchise is heading towards a finale.

Favorite memories: Watching the films over a long, bitter summer, as my only source of joy while working a thankless job and living in a place with bad internet reception.

#3. The Buffy-verse (1997-2004) Series Buffy the Vampire Slayer & Angel

Type of series: Live-Action TV shows

Genre: Supernatural

Favorite characters: Buffy, Cordelia, and Spike

Favorite season: Season 5 of Buffy, Season 2 of Angel

Favorite episodes: “Once More with Feeling” Buffy, “You’re Welcome” Angel

Bad points: Weak later seasons, Season 6, some bad filler

Why it’s here: If I was going on sentimental fandom value alone, the Buffy-verse would be number one. I still squee over this franchise years after I first discovered it; the characters have that special Joss Whedon flair that makes them stand out over the crowd, the series’ core relationships are so fascinating I’m tempted to write fanfic about them, and the philosophies and emotional moments in the series have shaped my life. I would never have known what existentialism was, for instance, if not for Whedon’s show. Angel’s line about “ all that matters is what we do” has helped motivate me ever since I heard it. But looking at the series’ quality (and diversity), I will admit that out of my top 3 favorites, it has the most problems. Both shows have one season I can cheerfully proclaim to be outright terrible, (Season 4 for Angel, Season 6 for Buffy), and very shaky first seasons that take a while to find their feet. There are some plot decisions I just can’t forgive, and some truly weak arc villains. But there is also so much that this franchise does so well, whether it be stellar standalones, bold plot moves, and of course, the character arcs.

Favorite memories: Rewatching the show on vacation in France.

#2. Avatar: The Last Airbender (2005-2008)

Type: Animated TV series

Genre: Fantasy Steampunk

Favorite characters: Zuko, Azula and Sokka

Favorite season: 2

Favorite episode: “The Guru”

Bad points: Forced romantic subplots, The Great Divide, odd conclusion

Why it’s here: You may have heard, if you’ve spent any time on the internet, what a fantastic series ATLA is. I try to avoid such phrases when attempting to sell the show to people, because describing a series that way is usually a bad move. But rest assured, it’s warranted. Avatar The Last Airbender is a stellar show in every possible way. Aside from the few bad points I mentioned above, ATLA does everything right. It has the best world building I’ve ever encountered. The animation, storytelling, emotions, messages (sometimes), plot points, philosophies, individual episodes, comedy, drama, action, epic sweep, surprise reveals…(several hours of listing things later) all of these things are pitch perfect. But as always, what makes this show is the cast. My lord, what a cast. These characters are so embedded in my mind, their arcs, personalities, development and entertainment value all stand out a cut above the rest. ATLA is a stunning masterpiece, one that no adaptation could capture, and that even it’s own creators have yet to follow up on, with either the sequel or the comics. But no matter. The original is there, it always will be, and more people discover it every day.

Favorite memories: Nothing quite compares to seeing ATLA for the first time. I saw it in 2014, one of the worst years of my life. Once again, my miserable experience was improved by a fantastic story.

Before #1: The Runners-up.

Game of Thrones: I used to adore GOT, but it started losing me after season 3; I lost respect for the show in season 5. still, those early seasons are still crucial parts of our culture and should be remembered.

Harry Potter: I grew up with these books and I still enjoy parts of them; overall, however, they strike me as being just a little less than they could have been.

Percy Jackson: I binged through the whole first book in a few hours, and loved these novels as a teen. As an adult, they don’t hold up as well, but I still appreciate the things they do right.

The Legend of Korra: The sequel to ATLA is spotty in many ways, but contains enough moments I absolutely love to make it at least a runner up.

South Park: Another series that got me through a bad time in my life and helped me deal with certain aspects of myself (especially episode 1507.) However, the early and late seasons are pretty bad, and the show doesn’t age very well.

Neon Genesis Evangelion: A bizarre little anime that nonetheless really stands out to me for how crazy it gets and how unique the story is.

Hannibal: A guilty pleasure - definitely a show that gets too far up it’s own butt in later episodes, but nonetehless appealing and interesting in the subjects it’s willing to tackle.

Parks and Recreation: My other favorite TV sitcom besides Fraser - it’s a strong runner up for the list but not quite sentimental enough.

Steven Universe: 3 great seasons, followed by a lot of recent mediocrity. Great when it’s great, bad when it’s not.

Code Geass: an immensely ambitious series, that doesn’t quite realize it’s goals but god damn if it isn’t a beautiful try.

Daria: Another show that really spoke to me in high school

Firefly: This was the biggest runner-up for the list. Firefly is 14 amazing episodes of television cut short too soon, giving us amazing characters and great world building in a short amount of time. The series has some bits that haven’t aged well, and those were enough to keep it off my top 10.

And now, the moment you’ve all been waiting for…

#1. Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood (manga: 2001-2010, anime 2009-2010)

Series type: Anime/Manga

Genre: Sci Fi (I think)

Favorite character: Edward Elric

Favorite episodes: “Flame of Vengeance”; “Backs in the Distance”

Bad points: None

Why it’s here: I’m gonna be brutally honest: FMAB is here because I can’t find anything wrong with it. It is, without question, the single most perfect piece of fiction I’ve ever come across. It almost frightened me when I first finished the series. Surely there must be some major, glaring flaw, some bad installment or weak character, that I could point to and say Look! Here’s the flaw! This was made by human hands after all! But nope. Many, many rereads through, and I still haven’t found one. FMAB stands supreme. This series has everything. The most fleshed out and real-feeling cast of characters I’ve ever come across (even minor background characters have spectacular arcs and feel like real people). The best pacing and plotting of an overall story arc. The best world building, aside from ATLA. The best exploration of social issues, the best feminism, the best use of mature storytelling. Everything comes back around. The themes, the mystery, the overall tone and story structure. I feel like an engineer gushing over the most perfectly calibrated car ever made each time I watch it. But Fullmetal is even more than just expertly made. It’s appealing. It’s popular. It’s the kind of story you can write essays on or write fanfic for. FMAB can be enjoyed in every capacity. I recommend taking the time to read the Manga first (that’s what I did), then watch Brotherhood. There really is nothing quite like FMAB. (oh, BTW, it has the best series finale of anything e ver. Period.)

Best memories: Watching Fullmetal while coping with death for the first time in my life. There is no better series when it comes to dealing with this subject.

#top ten list #CSI: Crime Scene Investigation #tv show #futurama #Death Note #L Lawliet #spiderman #gravity falls #frasier #marvel cinematic universe #Buffyverse #Avatar The Last Airbender #Fullmetal Alchemist

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afreakingdork · 3 years

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Review Revisited: The Gentlemen's Alliance Cross

So after I posted my 2007 Manga Reviews I got to thinking about how those series formed my early manga opinions and how much I’ve grown as a person since reading them. In the spirit of that, I thought it would be a great idea to revisit those series of yore and update my reviews of them with my older, wiser perspective.

The first up is the first that was on the list and a series that was closer to my heart than I remembered: Shinkuro (Shinshi Doumei Kurosu or The Gentlemen's Alliance Cross). Here’s the 2007 review as a refresher:

ShinKuro: Or Gentlemen’s Alliance Cross for those that aren’t familar with it…Ok so I love this series and its awesome bottom line~ 1-3 are out currently, its one of those stories you gotta read over at least 4 times before you understand the plot, or maybe i have a focus problems who knows, all i know is you need to go out and read this, its got everything yo! Straight, yuri, yaoi…idk I’m not much of a gay fangirl, but hey ya gotta cover japanese basics~

Before I get into the veritable mountain of things I want to talk about (I mean, I have 14 years of feelings to sort through), I first want to tell a story of fate. When I decided to re-do these reviews, I went to look for my old manga. It’s not far, about 50 steps away to my bookshelf, but I didn’t see Shinkuro anywhere. Confused, I waited until the next time I visited my mom to look there and could not find it. I knew when I moved out of her house in 2017 I had sold some extra books to make the move easier, but couldn’t recall a specific memory of packing them up. I checked my email and the only clue was a listing on eBay, but there was no sold email attached. I’m usually really diligent with stuff like that, so I was totally stumped. Regardless, I had no manga, so I went ahead and started reading it on some pirating website. Now, I don’t condone these sites, but I couldn’t find the series anywhere else for whatever reason. I was only able to get a few chapters in before I just couldn’t take it anymore. The site I was using (one of the only sites to even have a pirated version. Seriously, why had this series totally disappeared from the US lexicon!?) only had a fan-scan of the series. Now, Shinkuro is something I’ve read many, many, many times and, while the fan-scan wasn’t unreadable, I kept getting really hung up on how different it was from what I remembered. I would read a line and my brain would make an error noise and respond with what the line should be. As I clicked through the pages, the errors piled up more and more and my brain was relentless about how the lines should have been translated.

Frustrated, I totally gave up and the next time I saw my mom I told her of my plight. I could see the lightbulb go off over her head and she asked me if ‘that wasn’t the manga that didn’t sell on eBay and I gave to her to give away?’ I was taken aback; I hadn’t told her about the eBay email I found and instead only told her I couldn’t find the series I didn’t think I had gotten rid of. She said it was stored in a guest bedroom with a bunch of junk we were going to sell just before the pandemic struck last year. I was still incredulous, but she went back there with me to look for it. Now, no one knows my mom like I do, but I will tell you she is absolute garbage at describing stuff. She gave me this crazy description about a box that was the size of a loaf of bread and it had a hinge on it and I had no idea how that worked with cardboard. It took a long time, moving a metric shitton of full-to-the-brim boxes around to no avail. Since we were getting to the bottom of boxes that were stacked high, we were tag teaming the project where one person would lift and the other would rummage. It was at the bottom of a box in a 3-box stack that mom deemed the box incorrect by only shoving her hand inside. She said she felt a box, but it didn’t feel right so she moved on. I felt a pull and tilted my head so that I could see into the only sliver on the box, a tiny crack. I told her ‘I saw a box that looked kinda like a shoe box and is that what she meant by a hinge?’ She said she wasn’t sure, but we made quick work taking down the stack to reveal the smaller box. Upon closer inspection she said this had to be it and as I opened it there lay the entire 11 volume series. I tell you, I almost sobbed right there on the spot. What are the chances that I would try to sell the series, it wouldn’t sell (I listed all 11 volumes for 40$!!!), I would give it to mom to give away, she wouldn’t do so (she wasn’t sure what the age range for the books were), and then years later we would happen across it and mom would dismiss it while I pressed to check, to find these books. They were meant to stay with me is the only conclusion I can make and after re-reading the series I can say this is totally true, so let’s get into my renewed feelings:

So, looking at my old review, I know exactly what my younger self meant by rereading the same bit 4 times to understand. Arina Tanemura has a penchant for putting 1000 screentones over every page and sometimes she swiftly moves through conversations and even locations between panels on the same page. It’s a breakneck speed to try to give every character of this ensemble class a time to shine. There’s also the hurdles of Tanemura’s style that can’t be ignored. When my partner saw the manga, he asked me if all the art really looked like that and I showed him that, yes indeed, and that was almost a pretty standard art style for shoujou manga from that time period. He was aghast and didn’t believe he could read something like that and I can totally see how that would be off-putting for the average reader (I’m not average in the sense that I’ve read it so many times I know all the ins and outs). For example, in middle school Haine cut her hair off and dyed it blond. She dyes it back when she goes to high school, but halfway through the series she cuts it and dyes it back to blond for Ushio’s sake. Tanemura doesn’t change ANY screentones during this time and you only find out that Haine dyes her her back ONCE AGAIN in a throw away line. I’ve held the pages up side-by-side and it’s totally indiscernible when Haine’s hair is blond vs. brown.

That being said, one of the greatest parts of this series is how it was translated. There was so much love and care put into these Notes on the Text that it was the perfect series to start shaping my understanding of Japanese culture and writing. Instead of just a glossary saying what ‘-san’ meant as a suffix, these sections go so far as to explain why certain phrases were translated as they were and explain what the original Japanese text said and how it was a joke or a play on words. That is so rare to see in manga and I feel like it should be more standard.

Now to face the elephant in the room head-on: let’s look into the LGBT+ themes in the series. 2007 Alex was quite afraid and prejudiced against queer culture. I can’t tell you where exactly it stemmed from because I don’t really remember feeling that way. I know it happened, I have evidence and my friends’ testimonies, but it doesn’t feel like I had that much hate in my heart. It’s systemic to our culture and that may be why, but regardless, I feel awful that I once felt that way. I was scared getting into this series that the LGBT+ themes would be handled so poorly as it often is in manga. Thankfully, that didn’t end up wholly being the case. In her author’s notes, Tanemura stated multiple times that she was not a fan of mlm or wlw content, but she wanted to use this series to push herself to do a lot of things she didn’t like otherwise. I want to put an excerpt on her final thoughts on those themes in the series here:

I don’t know how the readers feel, but I’ve never been very fond of reading guy x guy and girl x girl relationships. But that was another reason for me to have done this series. I thought the series would have a nice twist to it if I tried to draw something I didn’t like.

I regularly challenge myself to eat things I don’t like. I don’t like the idea of having dislikes, so it became an opportunity for me to get over that.

And the result was... I still couldn’t get myself to be interested in it. So it’ll probably be a topic I’ll never write about again. But I think it was still worth it that I found that out.

I won’t take the time to break down homophobia in Japanese society, but I find it interesting that Tanemura sees queer relationships not as a real thing in her stories, but instead as a commodity that she can compare to tastes in food. I found the story lines really compelling. Take Maora, for example. Tanemura refers to Maora as eccentric for cross dressing in her author notes, but in story Maora is actually characterized with a surprising amount of care on the subject. While some may view Maora as a ‘trap,’ I would instead posit that he’s genderfluid. Obviously he goes by he/him, but I think it’s so interesting that when told that boys couldn’t marry, Maora goes to great lengths to present as a female so Maguri and him could be together as they always wanted. When Maguri rejects this because he’s gay and prefers male presenting individuals, Maora holds on to his ‘femininity’ because it means something to him. All the work he put in is a representation of his love and later becomes something that he enjoys doing. There are, of course, a few pitfalls. I’m not a fan of the fact that when going to the Emperor’s Association meeting, Maora feels like he must dress more masculine because it’s a serious event (giving the connotation that dressing feminine is just a frivolous thing). I also really hate one of Maora’s final lines in the penultimate arc when the student council is breaking into Shuichiro’s house and he says “Don’t you blush! I’m a guy!” before kicking someone. I think Tanemura meant for that to be a cool one-liner, but instead it just undercuts who Maora is.

On the flip side, I really like how Ushio’s love of Haine is characterized. While Ushio’s means of capturing Haine aren’t the best, I think her love is a beautiful arc. Ushio fell in love with a blond yanki that happened to break into her house to hide when she was at the lowest point in her life. When Haine has her night with Shizumasa and decides to ‘move back into the light,’ time stops for Ushio as Haine leaves her. Ushio is left looking for that person who saw her when everything else in her life was filled with hate. There is a beautiful story there where she realizes her love for Haine isn’t romantic or sexual love, but instead the powerful love in friendship. This story always holds the different types of love in high regard. It is stated multiple times that Takanari and Haine both hold their best friends in their hearts higher than their romantic partners and I adore that. It’s such a healthier way to represent relationships. Your romantic partners shouldn’t just supersede your other loves just because.

The development of loves on the other hand can be a bit rocky. The bonus story between Kusame and Komaki is always one I held in such high regard because it’s characterization of changing love. Kusame, who’s been in love with Haine, starts dating her sister Komaki out of obligation and he ends up falling in love with her not because she’s similar to Haine, but instead because of how different she is and how those were things that he grew to appreciate and love about her instead. Can you say relationship goals?! Contrasting that, you have the relationships between Itsuki Otomiya, Kazuhito Kamiya, and Maika Rikyuu. Maika and Itsuki were secretly dating in high school and Kazuhito sweeps in, steals the position of emperor from Itsuki by underhanded means and ensnares Maika in a marriage due to obligation for her family’s failing company. Over time, Maika grows to love Kazuhito and the whole thing always left a bad taste in my mouth. Maybe if the pages had been given a little more time it could have worked, there’s small signifiers, like how Kazuhito and Maika met and were friends before he pulled his repulsive plot. There was a precedent that the two got along and could have fallen in love, but instead it went full Stockholm and that is painted as ok. I do want to take a moment to say that scene where Itsuki returns from visiting Maika for the first time since all that happened where his current wife Ryouka stayed up because she was afraid he was going to leave her and he reassures her that he would have never done so was downright incredible.

The timeline of Maika losing her memories confounds me as a way to keep her away from Haine. I know Kazuhito didn’t give her much choice in the matter, but she had a whole other child before she started to lose her memories and there is quite an age difference (like 7+ or so years) between Komaki and Tachibana, where Maika had her memories (for a few years?) and just made no effort to contact Haine in any way. It just seems overly cruel and unnecessary when Maika wrote a letter to Haine saying she would continue to write even though she couldn’t see her. I know a maid was watching her, but she couldn’t send a letter? She already sent one letter! Kazuhito’s goal was to give Haine back to Itsuki so she could live freely without the burden of his influence because he knows he’s an asshole that only cares about Maika and clipped her wings. He wants to atone for still keeping Maika trapped by letting Haine soar, but keeping Haine from at least talking to her mother through letters is just erroneous. That didn’t keep her free from him, it only made her miserable from not being able to talk to her mom. Ugh, just writing about it makes me so mad.

It’s interesting to me that in her distaste for LGBT+ themes, Tanemura was about to have a polyamorous ending to the series. It’s disheartening that the only reason she didn’t do so was because she could only imagine there would be a power imbalance where Shizumasa would have been a pitiful party in such an arrangement. It’s not like I was rooting for a threesome (especially since two of them are twin brothers), but it’s an outdated view on what polyamorous relationships are actually like. Also, Takanari is the clear winner and I’m not sure why it’s ever a question for Haine. When you break it down, Haine really only spent one single night with Shizumasa while she actually had months and months of time built up with Takanari to build the foundation of a real relationship, but that’s neither here nor there.

Overall, I’m so glad I re-read this series and I will never try to resell it ever again. It means so much to me and even though it’s CW levels of dramatic happenings (I can’t believe Toya pulled a gun on and shot Haine), there is a market for those things and they’re enjoyable in how bizarre they are. There’s obviously some failing to the story, but as a whole I still love it, even nostalgia aside. I think it’s a great series for those new to shoujou drama’s to read!

Verdict:

Read Right < Left

#me #manga #manga review #review #The Gentlemen's Alliance Cross #Gentlemen's Alliance Cross #Shinshi Doumei Kurosu #shinkuro

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stacks-reviews · 7 years

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New Releases 11/14/17

‘Happy New Release Day! Today brings a few new manga and a graphic novel, along with a couple of new shows/movies, and even a new video game from Nintendo.

In Books --Fairy Tail Volume 62 by Hiro Mashima “During the chaos of war,the demon Acnologia slinks his way into the ranks. As Erza, Wendy, and Gajeel prepare to face their hardest battle yet, a strange woman shows up to lift their spirits! The woman knows the secret to sealing Acnologia away, but will the gang be able to execute her orders! Meanwhile, brothers Natsu and Zeref go head-to-head, with their lives on the line! The fate of the world sinks further into peril when Zeref reveals his ultimate mission: Neo Eclipse!”

I can’t believe this series is almost over (at least in the US). Just one more volume remains. I think I’m going to wait to pick this one up until volume 63 comes out so I can get them together. The last volume I read was somewhere in the early 50′s, I think. I started rereading the series but paused midway through volume 8 and will continue from there once the last volume is released.

--Forbidden Scrollery Volume 1 by Moe Harukawa “Where else would a girl with the power to translate any tome she sets in her lap reside except a library? Sure, some books may be more dangerous than others, but that's far from discouragement for a true bibliophile like Kosuzu Motoori!”

Books that are dangerous. That may or may not magical in some form. With artwork that reminds me of Cardcator Sakura. Sign me up. I really would like to try this series cause as I’ve mentioned before I’m a sucker for books that have books being a form of power in worlds. I did flip through some of this volume when it arrived early at my work. And it looks promising.

--Frau Faust Volume 2 by Kore Yamazaki “After narrowly escaping a battle with Lorenzo, Johanna falls unconscious. In her wounded state, the century-old memories of her first encounter with Mephistopheles run through her head. In these memories are answers Marion is beginning to understand: what is the nature of his master’s immortality, and how is her curse inextricably tied to the body of her demon? Faust, Marion, and Nico’s immediate aim is to find Mephisto’s right leg, a mission that becomes more urgent when evidence of a young girl using demonic power comes to light. To find the next piece of her precious demon, Johanna may even need to form a tenuous deal with Lorenzo...”

From the creator of The Ancient Magus’ Bride comes Frau Faust. I enjoyed the first volume of this series which included a cute short about a museum that houses invisible exhibits. I would like to see Yamazaki explore that short more in the future. The first volume follows Johanna as she tries to find the missing pieces of the demon Mephisto held captive by the church. Along the way she gains an apprentice named Marion and they meet up with Nico, Johanna’s daughter.

My favorite part of volume 2 was learning about how Johanna meet Mephisto.

--Rose Volume 1 by Meredith Finch, illustrated by Ig Guara “A classic fantasy tale about a girl trying to restore balance to a broken world. Rose must connect with her Khat—Thorne—to become the Guardian the world needs. But things aren’t easy for Rose and Thorne, the powerful sorcerous Drucilla has many powerful and demonic allies—all of them focused on stopping one scared little girl who’s desperately trying to stay alive and do what’s right.”

I have been waiting on this one since I first saw the cover to issue one earlier this year. A warrior-girl with her giant black panther companion. It was a good start to the series though the volume felt a bit rushed. A few of the pages cut off part of some sentences near the end of the volume. I am looking forward to volume 2 and hope that the pacing might find a better flow. I think it’s worth checking out.

In Movies/TV Shows --91 Days “Prohibition—a lawless era where bootleggers prosper and mobsters prowl. Avilio Bruno has grown up alone in this murky world after the Vanetti's murdered his family. One day, he receives a letter that holds the key to revenge. Befriending the don's son, Nero, Avilio works his way through the Vanetti family and sets his vengeance in motion.”

I haven’t had time to try this one out yet but I really want to. There is a standard and an LE edition. The LE has an art box and comes with a 40 page companion guide that has, “artwork, character profiles, background information on Prohibition, the Chicago mafia, period firearms, and more.” And a set of six art cards.

--Atomic Blonde “An undercover MI6 agent is sent to Berlin during the Cold War to investigate the murder of a fellow agent and recover a missing list of double agents.”

I was really excited to see this one because of how they treated the main character. They made her fight how a woman would actually need to fight. And they made it also realistic by how bruised and cut up she was after all this was over. When she got punched in the face that bruise would stay there. Some of those fights were painful to watch just of the pain you see was being done to her. The fight scenes in this movie were just fantastic. But the plot was a little convoluted. Maybe it will make more sense during a second watch. Either way it was an enjoyable movie to watch.

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/atomic-blonde-doesnt-pretend-women-fight-like-men-and-the-result-is-awesome_us_597b3c67e4b02a8434b5df58

--Blue Exorcist Kyoto Saga Set 1 “Born the spawn of Satan, Rin Okumura decides to hide his origins, and become an exorcist. He enrolls at the Exorcism Cram School, a training institute for exorcists located on the True Cross Academy grounds. But, his cover is blown during an attack by Amaimon, the King of Earth, and he is revealed to be the son of Satan. Terrified of Satan’s blue flames, his friends start to distance themselves from Rin…It is then that someone steals the Left Eye of the Impure King, sealed away in the deepest part of the academy, and Rin and the others find themselves embroiled in an unexpected crisis.”

The newest season of Blue Exorcist is starting to release. It was a pretty good season. And now I’m trying to remember if I finished it or not. I feel like I did but now I can’t remember.... Anyway. This is an Aniplex title so it is going to be a bit higher. There is a DVD edition and a Blu-Ray. They contain episodes 1-6 of this season. But if you buy the Blu-Ray it also comes with a booklet and some postcards.

--Doctor Who Complete Series 10 The final season of Peter Capaldi as 12 and with Steven Moffat as executive producer is now out as a complete set. Pearl Mackie was great as Bill Potts though sometimes I can’t help but feel like they could have done more with her character. Once I see the season again I might change my mind but for now that thought occasionally pops up.

My favorite episodes of this season are “Smile”, “Thin Ice” if only to watch the Doctor punch that guy over and over, “Empress of Mars”, and the two-part season finale.

--In This Corner Of the World “Based on the award-winning manga by Fumiyo Kouno, In This Corner Of the World tells the emotional story of Suzu, a young girl from Hiroshima, who’s just become a bride in the nearby city of Kure during World War II. Living with her husband’s family, Suzu has to adjust to her new life, which is made especially difficult by regular air raids. But life must go on, and Suzu - through the help of her new family and neighbors - begins to discover the joys of everyday life in Kure. Much is gained in Kure, but with war, many things cherished are also lost.”

This just looks fantastic. I’m really excited to see this one.

--Pokemon Indigo League S1 The original that started it all is out on blu-ray for what should be the first time. I love the Indigo League. It’s where I started with Pokemon. And it has some the saddest episodes I’ve seen from the series. At least up until the point where I stopped watching. I tried to pick it back up during the last season and the new Sun and Moon seasons but it has been sporadic.

This set has the first 52 episodes of the series. It also comes with a 64 page manga sampler, a recipe card, the complete Pokerap, and a “Who’s That Pokemon” gallery. I feel like they could have done more for this release as the extras just feel like a pull for you to start buying the manga and one of their Pokemon cookbooks.

I really hope they kept the other songs in at the end of episodes instead of just the Pokerap. I love the Pokerap but I also love the other songs. Yeah, I have them on one of the soundtracks but I’d still like to see them at the end of the episodes.

The box itself is really cool. It is designed to look like the original Pokedex.

--Preacher S2 “Jesse, Tulip and Cassidy hit the road in search of God, and quickly realize they're being stalked by a killer cowboy from Hell.”

I wasn’t as crazy about this season as I was the first. I’ve been that way with a lot of series this year. It is still a good series and had a great start to the season. And ended with a great cliffhanger.

In Video Games --RiME (Nintendo Switch version) “In RiME, you play as a young boy who has awakened on a mysterious island after a torrential storm. You see wild animals, long-forgotten ruins and a massive tower that beckons you to come closer. Armed with your wits and a will to overcome—and the guidance of a helpful fox—you must explore the enigmatic island, reach the tower's peak, and unlock its closely guarded secrets.”

I’ve been really excited for this game for a while. But I am conflicted. It is half price if I get it on my PS4 but I was really hoping to get it for my Switch. Visually it looks gorgeous and the OST is supposed to be really good. But I have heard that the puzzles aren’t very challenging. I still want to try it out. Now I just need to decide what console I want it for.

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mizukixtsukiyomi · 7 years

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11 Questions Tag

I was tagged by @doodle-roon & @bunny-wk-fanfic. I can’t just do one because I love you both.

Rules

1. Post the rules 2. Answer the questions given to you by the tagger 3. Write 11 questions of your own 4. And tag 11 people

@doodle-roon‘s questions:

1. Can you explain your favorite color without saying what it is?

This is a hard one, especially since I suck at describing things and the irony of me being a writer...well, it’s dark, yet calming. It can remind you of a dark and cool night where gold star shine their purpose. It’s a water reflecting a mix of night.

2. Describe your favorite thing about one of the people you’ve met online.

We can both fangirl over every husband anime we have claimed, and the continuous talks have always made my days. I love to hear about her day, hearing her talk about her favorite anime/game husbandos and her kind heart <3

3. How are you feeling today and can you find a quote to go with it?

“ Today I will not stress over things I can’t control.” - Author Unknown

These past two weeks have been very challenging, and mostly because I have been trying to learn to cope with my anxiety and calm it down when I am at work. I conquered many fears while I was doing it, but even so I remember crying all the anxiety out after work. If you have anxiety or have similar situations you may understand how hard it is to keep it in and then finally it comes out. So right now, I am okay (since it is Sunday), but I am at the same time worried about Monday for work.

4. Did anything memorable happen this year?

Many things that I would consider memorable. I got my license which I never thought I would, and I got a job! And I was able to visit Japan again <3 and lastly, graduated with my Bachelor’s and started on graduate school. Hoping next year continues to bless me, and others.

5. What genre/type of book do you typically avoid? What would change your mind about it?

Oh, that is a good question. I usually avoid non-fiction, mainly because some can bore me, BUT if they are interesting like real crime books, and ones I can learn about interesting people, then I read them.

6. Dark, milk, white, or no chocolate?

Most definitely dark chocolate!

7. What’s something that you’ve learned as you’ve aged?

Nothing goes as planned, but having some sort of plan does help. Adult life isn’t easy, and people paint this picture of what it is. The truth is, it isn’t pretty, but life is about learning new things every day, and making mistakes is how you will learn more. Don’t be afraid of the unknown <3.

8. What’s your favorite thing about your favorite holiday?

I love Christmas! There is something about this holiday that gives me peace, and I just love that feeling Christmas brings. It’s hard to explain, but Christmas reminds me how lucky I have been every year despite the challenges.

9. Are you more intrigued by the past or the future?

You know, it’s a mix of the two. I like to learn about the past in hopes the future becomes a better place. The past has been ugly, and although that can never change, the future can. And one of the things I love to see about the future is how things progress whether it be morals, technology, and watching and hearing kids wanting to do better for the world.

10. Where did you get your taste in music?

I have a weird taste in music, especially since I like to listen to soundtracks. I absolutely love them (Ivan Torrent Reverie album is amazing). I think they started when I listened to anime soundtracks and then youtube just recommending more different ones. As far as music with lyrics, I get it from my mother. She loves latin music, so I listen to it in my car haha.

11. Top three things on your bucket list.

1. Visit most of the Asian countries

2. Become fluent in Japanese

3. Write a book

@bunny-wk-fanfic‘s questions:

1. Is there something you can do or do better than your family?

You know, I don’t know, but maybe take in information a bit differently. My mother has always told me I am a fast learner and have a good memory of news, facts, history, etc. so she says I am good with academics - that’s it haha.

2. If you had the chance to be with whoever you wanted for a weekend, regardless of status/cultural differences/ect., what would you do with them?

Oh, I would pick Ellen! I want to have a deep conversation, and just thank her for being such a humble human being. I love her so much, and I hope to meet her someday, but Barack Obama is on this list, too.

3. What is your favorite time of year and why?

Fall season for me because I love that I can finally use my boots that have been dusting up in my closet. I live in Arizona, btw. And also I can wear more jeans, and long sleeves. I hate shorts and stuff haha.

4. Who was your first character crush?

That would have to be Ichigo from Bleach. I mean, he is still cute, but I have others who are at the top of the list hehe.

5. What was your future dream when you were a kid?

Becoming a teacher. Don’t know why, but I had always wanted to be a teacher not to teach them because I know kids can teach me so much more than I can.

6. Book-Comics-Games vs Movie/Manga vs Anime. Which version is better?

This one is tough, but I would pick Movie/Manga vs Anime, but books can be included, too!

7. What is the fondest memory you have in regards to practical scaring another person?

Since I was little (and before my mother married my stepdad), I was living with my grandmother, aunt, and my mother in an apartment and I would love to wait for them to come out of the bathroom, and I just pop out from the side. They would laugh and then get angry.

8. Is there anything from your childhood that you think that should be brought back? ie. a toy, game, candy, fashion, show, etc.

This is coming back (I think?) but oversized denim jackets. I just love them <3

9. If there was one thing you could change in the world today, and it would be universal, what would it be?

Government corruption. Period. I think it has ruined so many innocent families, and I just wish these people would be gone.

10. What was your favorite subject in grade school and is it still your favorite now? Yes, no, what?

Math. I enjoy it; it’s like a puzzle. Although I saw that the method they do things now in grade school has changed!

11. What are you looking forward to this Christmas?

Food! And the beautiful Christmas lights. Sometimes the lights really put a little joy in me.

My Questions:

If you could be in any movie/cartoon/anime/book world, what would it be, and why?

What do you do on a rainy day (if you were to have the day off)?

Which childhood movie/cartoon/anime do you wish they would remake?

How would you describe your fashion-style?

If you had all the money in the world, what country would you live in?

Is there something you are proud you have accomplished so far?

Who is your ultimate OTP? (can be crossover or OC).

What will be your goal or resolution for 2018?

What is something you will not wear (hats, sweaters, shorts, etc.)?

If you could meet any celebrity, which one would it and why?

Have you made friendships online that you would consider are special to you?

Tagging (if you have been tagged, you can ignore mine):

@masquerabe @joker2113 @kakashixangela @fenrae-l @yoursalwaysfics @saey0ungs @shinsen-haruki @wolfluvr420 @starmienight @creamdream0426 @strudelqueen

#ask mizuki #enjoy

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beatricethecat2 · 7 years

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if/then - 7

I've been fussing over the mechanics of the next few chapters for a while now, figuring out when and where to drop clues, as some pushback will happen in the upcoming arc. I apologize for the lack of Helena in this chapter, but she'll reappear, fully formed, in chapter 8. Also, I admit I know nothing about Italian, so I hope the little I've dotted into this isn't horribly wrong. This is still clunky, but I'd rather put it out and move forward than get stuck on form. (editied 8/18).

Previously: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6

Read first if you are new! gutted/sorted and wax/wane…if/then is a continuation of those two.

//////////////////////

“Nothing so far is even remotely what Mrs. Frederic’s looking for.”

Myka’s annoyed, both at the man sitting in front of her and her clusterfuck of a morning, which began the minute she stepped foot in Italy.

“Scusa?” the man says as his overly smiley face droops beyond that of a practiced salesman.

“This is what I’m here to see.” Myka sets down her expresso then taps her tablet awake and slides the device across the table.

Myka stretches her neck as the man flicks through inventory then rubs the bridge of her nose in hopes of minimizing the headache she’s had since landing. Clearly, her lack of sleep is catching up with her, yet she doesn’t regret that promises of “later” were fulfilled, rather pleasantly, once her application was complete. Hence she downs the rest of her coffee and considers ordering another; if she has to wait while this guy compares their notes, she might as well be over-caffeinated.

She curses herself for believing him when he'd insisted everything was in order as she sees him now for what he is: a kid. His baby face hides under his short, sharp beard and his spotted bow tie and pocket square try a little too hard to be professional. He’s probably an intern recently promoted to sales, the only one free to meet her at such short notice.

She feels genuinely bad for Floriana, the woman she was meant to meet, as this morning her son was hit by a motorcycle on his way to school. He’s ok, they’ve learned recently, no broken bones or anything, but the painful reality of a child being hurt must be overwhelming. If that had been Christina—her heart races at the thought—Helena would be inconsolable; she’d hop on a plane and sneak into the country just to be by her side.

As she sips her empty expresso, she considers the fact she’s never worried over a child like that and imagines Helena’s day to day worry must be tenfold. She kind of checked out when she got to London, allowing work and Helena to envelop her; she assumed Christina’d be fine since responsible adults were there to care for her. She should really check in unprompted and send some photos, tonight from the hotel...

“Signora Bering,” the man says, “this is not what Signora Stukowski has given me.” He points to her tablet and hands over his.

As Myka flips through inventory, her nostrils flare: wrong period, wrong category, wrong everything. “When did you get this?”

“Questa mattina. You were in the air.” He points his eyes upward.

Myka breathes in a deep, cleansing breath and closes her eyes, telling herself to stay calm. Of course, Sally sent the wrong files, because if Sally could, she would. It’s happened before, and it's happening again. In fact, she’s beginning to think she does it on purpose just to trip her up. But this time around it doesn't make any sense. Sally needs this client to stay on Mrs. Frederic’s good side; Myka has the advantage of the private sale.

But it is possible Mrs. Frederic changed the roster last minute, while she was in the air. And while she’s checked her messages a million times, Sally's not the most communicative; she could have easily sent the files assuming Myka was already in the loop.

“Let me call Sally,” Myka says, whipping out her phone and scrolling through to her number. When the line goes straight to voicemail, she tries the front desk and learns the entire staff's in an impromptu meeting with Mrs. Frederic. No one's sure when it will end.

“Fortuna?” the man asks as Myka sets her phone on the table.

“No,” Myka says, shaking her head. She looks down at his tablet and flicks through a few pages. “Could we continue with these and see my list later?”

As he flips through Myka's images, the man's cheeks puff out comically as he slowly blows out a breath.

“I'll try Sally again later.”

“Si,” he says, nodding his head slowly as he stares at the device. “We can do."

“Grazie,” Myka says, with genuine apology: it’s not his fault they’ll be working overtime. “Let me buy you another coffee. And some lunch,” she adds, eyes wandering behind him, towards the counter.

The man looks over his shoulder and smiles at the menu on the wall. “Si, si, manga,” he says, “Let us ‘regroup,' Signora Bering.”

“Myka,” she says. “Call me, Myka."

------------------

As she stretches to her full-length on the bed, her muscles groan in relief, their release from gravity long overdue. She and Maritzo managed to view everything on both lists but didn’t finish until well after dinner. In the end, she's glad he was her guide and knows she's lucky he was young was eager to please.

Sally, when reached, confirmed Myka’s list was correct, but there was little apology in her apology over the confusion. If she had the energy, she’d have been angry, but she knew it wasn't worth her time. If this private sale works out, she most likely won’t be working with Sally any longer. In fact, Mrs. Frederic emailed her today, asking, tentatively, if she’d represent the gallery in the pre-sale showing, details to be discussed upon her arrival back in London.

The thought occurs to her she needs to go over her newest “anonymous source” email but admits to herself she’s wiped; it will have to wait until morning. She peels herself off the bed and showers, then texts Helena good night and is out like a light before Helena has a chance to respond.

-------------

Though they’ve met once before and emailed frequently, Myka's nerves surge as she enters Theodora’s gallery, as she’s learned Theodora’s not your average widowed retiree. Her anonymous source clued her into some history: back in the day, Theodora and her husband rubbed elbows with both Mrs. Frederic and James Macpherson, chasing down impossible finds like the one she’s been researching.

Theodora's space is intimate and classically European, boasting elaborate white moldings and intricate parquet floors. The front room is filled with contemporary sculpture she recognizes from Vanessa’s roster, while the back holds unique curated treasures. As she passes through to the office, she walks up to a lectern where an illuminated manuscript sits. It’s in pristine condition, which is unusual for its age, and she wonders where a self-proclaimed “humble gallerist” might stumble upon such a rare find.

She’s put at ease by Theodora’s warm welcome, and when their business is tied up sooner the expected, Theodora insists she stay for lunch. Myka’s flight isn’t until three, so gladly accepts and truthfully, she’d like to get to know Theodora better.

After a short walk down a picturesque cobblestone street, she's soon sipping wine in a charming outdoor cafe, listening intently as Theodora waxes poetic about the old days when she was partnered with Mrs. Frederic.

“What was she like back then?” Myka asks.

“The same as she is now,” Theodora answers and motions to the waiter for more wine. “Always pushing the envelope."

“I’ve only met her once. In her office. It was pretty formal.”

“I’ll tell you this: her intentions are always above board, but not everything goes to plan.” Theodora swirls the wine in her glass, studying it as it spins, then tilts her head back, downing the last swig.

“She likes you,” she says, pointing her newly empty glass at Myka.

“She does?”

“She wouldn’t have sent you here otherwise. And I’m sure she already has you working on something special.”

The waiter returns with a fresh bottle of wine and fills both glasses. Myka watches the liquid pour with reservations, already feeling tipsy.

“I think I even know what she’s got you on if the rumors are true. Henry and I chased it years ago, but never found hard proof it existed."

Myka opens her mouth to answer but hesitates; as a confidante of Mrs. Frederic, she should be able to tell Theodora what she’s researching, but it could be a test, to see what it would take to loosen her tongue.

“Oh, it’s hush-hush, I know, no need to fret. It’s just…”

Theodora stares at Myka as if sizing her up. Myka wonders if she wants to hear what she has to say.

“I seem to recall you have a daughter.”

“I, uh...." Not where Myka thought this conversation was going, but it's interesting she remembers her mentioning Christina. "Christina’s Helena’s daughter, not mine. Helena's my…girlfriend." Partner is the correct word here, and she knows it, but if Theodora knows what the private sale is for, she may very well know of Helena’s connection to Macpherson. It might be best to stay a step back until she learns where Theodora is going with this.

“Ah, yes. Now I remember,” Theodora says, siping her wine. “She’s in London because of a visa ’situation.' She and her daughter are why you’re doing all of this. Correct?”

Myka slides her hands off the table and clasps them together on her lap. How much does Theodora know beyond what she’s told her? Maybe she needs to be careful with what she says.

“Um...yeah.”

“Remember that, as you make decisions moving forward.”

“Remember what?”

“Your motivations.”

“I’m not sure I follow.”

That very moment, their food arrives. Theodora thanks the waiter then turns her attentions back to Myka.

“Do you love her?” she says, pointing her fork at Myka before tucking into her meal.

“More than anything.”

“And her daughter?”

“Of course.”

“Then remember, the most important thing in life to nurture is family. Family's what’s left when everything else falls flat.”

“Why would everything fall flat?” If Theodora knows something about this sale or Helena that she doesn’t, she wants to know.

Theodora sets down her fork and straightens her posture, then dabs the corner of her mouth with a napkin. “Henry and I did what you’re doing for a lot of years. When we had our kids, it complicated things. We both wanted them, but neither of us was ready to settle down. So we compromised by taking turns, one of us staying with the kids while the other was in the field.”

Does she think Helena’s still working? She must know that’s impossible after the trial. “Do you regret not settling down?”

“I regret not spending more time with the kids and Henry together. Especially when they were little.”

Myka looks on, still confused.

“How old is Helena's Christina?"

“Eight. Eight and a half if you ask her in person.” Myka smiles at the memory of the day Christina told her about her birthday. They were filling out the calendar with Helena’s schedule, but the calendar only went through December, so she wrote out the months following on the last page.

“I know you’re just starting out, and you're excited about your projects, but let me give you a piece of advice. When you’re with Helena and Christina, try to live in the moment, take stock of what you have. It seems silly at your age; you always think they’ll be time later, then suddenly, there’s no time at all.”

Theodora’s gaze drifts off into the distance, and her eyes glass over. Myka reaches across the table and places her hand on top of Theodora’s.

“A-Are you ok?"

“I'm fine," Theodora says, with a small sniff. “When the melancholy kicks in, I tend to babble; another reason why I keep to myself these days.”

“You miss him.”

“Most days.”

Henry must linger in Theodora's memories like Helena's family does in hers.

“Thank you, for the advice. I appreciate it.”

“Oh, I’m sure you’ll all be fine. I forget times have changed, with technology and all.”

Theodora slides her hand from underneath Myka’s and places it on top, then squeezes it slightly. Myka smiles at the gesture.

“I'll tell you, Irene only pushes those she deems worthy, but she’ll push until they break. Make sure you push back before that happens."

“I will,” Myka says, nodding as she slides her hand back across the table. She fingers the stem of her glass and takes a generous sip, wishing she felt more flattered than worried by Theodora’s words.

--------------

Her concentration’s a bust on the plane back to London; emails left unanswered as Theodora’s words swirl through her head.

Her warnings were overkill, weren’t they? As she said, she's just starting out, trying to fix what’s broken. If she looks at things logically, Helena rescued her in her time of need, and she’s returning the favor, though the stakes are higher now since they’re together. But four or five months of rocky coupledom does not add up to a family, per se, not in the sense Theodora was describing.

In fact, the word “family” leaves a sour taste in her mouth; she'd turned her nose up at the notion with Sam; having more important things to accomplish before settling down. She's aware the word is a trigger as babies and marriage were always Tracy’s domain; she’d roll her eyes when Tracy incessantly talked about both when they were teenagers. But as the oldest, she’d been expected to tie the knot first, expected to produce; luckily that bullet was dodged by Tracy taking the lead, lessening the pressure on her.

But “family” is the best word to describe Helena, Christina, and Claudia, and when applied to them it warms her heart. She’s proud to have joined them along their journey. She smiles at the memory of Christina’s drawing, scribbled in crayon, still hanging on the fridge, depicting her holding hands with Helena. Even at that early stage, she was welcomed with open arms into their fold.

And while she trails behind Claudia in the responsibility department, that dynamic will change when she, Helena and Christina live together. Once their situation stabilizes, everyone’s roles will shift towards the traditional. Is she really ready for that? She's not sure.

She’s been so focused on getting to London she hasn’t thought much about what happens after. Theodora must have seen glimmers of her own lack of vision in Myka, of starting a family but never fully embracing change. She should heed her advice and learn work with it, not fight against it. Easier said than done, but she vows to take Theodora’s words to heart.

--------------

After a quick stop to freshen up, Myka speeds off to her work mixer, coincidentally located at the same restaurant Helena had scrambled to get reservations earlier. This seemed odd to her, out of all the restaurants in London, but Helena assured her it was a popular choice with the “in" crowd.

The table is packed when she arrives, with a mass cheer rising as she approaches; it’s clear everyone’s been letting loose. When all eyes move behind her then forward to meet her own, she’s hit with a wave of awkwardness. Helena's expected to have tagged along tonight, but she's clearly not present.

She apologizes for Helena’s absence, explaining she didn’t know until she stepped off the plane Helena had to work last minute. Everyone’s been eager to meet her "black sheep” girlfriend since the day Helena met Mrs. Frederic and emerged unscathed. In fact, Helena’s reputation has even tinged Myka with an air of mystique around the office, which she thinks is quite amusing.

A coworker motions for her to sit next to them, saying they’ve saved her a seat and she does as instructed. Her heart sinks at the sight of Helena’s empty spot next to her; disappointed Helena chose to work over her. She knows sacrifices must be made to keep the weekend free for Christina and Claudia, but she was really looking forward to introducing Helena to the group, both to put an end to the rumors and to show Helena off.

Wine flows freely during every course of the meal, and as the table fills with stories and laughter, she leans back and takes stock, recognizing a lightness in her chest she hasn’t felt for ages. She’s having a really good time with these people, an even mix of folks older and younger than her, and is pleased the discussion stays on topics unrelated to kids and school. The evening feels like coworker gatherings in Chicago and Seattle, and it’s reaffirming to be reminded of who she was all those years ago on her own.

As the woman sitting next to her checks her phone, Myka stiffens as she asks the time. Helena begged her to meet for a nightcap at the bar to make up for missing dinner and Myka reluctantly agreed, but at this rate, it will close before she gets there.

“Sorry, I have to go,” she says, rising so abruptly her chair nearly topples backward. “I’ll see everyone tomorrow."

-TBC-

#BERING AND WELLS #w13 #fanfiction #if/then #AU Week #Sometimes when you have too much on your plate #you have to 'relax' by doing other things #things that are still work #but work you are doing for yourself #so you stay up too late #to knock out a chapter of fanfiction #(for the 2 people still reading #hopefully the next chapter will be up sooner rather than later #it actually already written in full #but needs shaping)

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