#my pooor poor boy

[matan4il]

911 ep 705 first watch reactions

Of course 911 would "punish" the "You are the boss of you!" guy with an alien hand that attacks him, and does what it wants. Pooor Buck and Eddie paying the price for that...

Okay, love the storyline with Hen and Karen possibly eventually adopting an older girl. Too many shows just find easy, unrealistic ways to give their same sex couples kids, and I am really glad that 911 shows the reality of it, and that it is a more complex struggle for many, that it's an act of continuously choosing to be parents. That's actually an amazing, difficult thing, and it should be faithfully depicted and respected, for all of its heartache, and the little moments of triumph.

Buck and Tommy on a date, and Eddie comes along with Marisol? Love how Buck's bisexual awakening and coming out continues to involve Eddie so much. Tell me they're end game, even if they're not gonna get together right now, without telling me they're...

I did not need to learn Marisol is moving in with Eddie like this, with any build up, or even any sort of insight into the relationship, and nope, that does not bode well for them. IDK how 911 managed to do it, but they have somehow managed to give Eddie a love interest the show is even less invested in than Ana.

And the funniest bit, is that Marisol and Eddie's big development is only there to further Buck's journey anyway.

"You can never have too much closet space" LMAO the way 911 both made me laugh, and feel sorry for poor, baby bi Buck. XD

Hmmm. Were parts of this scene cut out? We don't get to see Eddie on his own date with Marisol, but constantly looking over at Tommy and Buck? Boo. I'm glad we at least got the BTS photos, then. But seriously, why!? That was gonna be so delicious.

Oh, Tommy's breaking up with Buck. I mean, good for him, and he ain't wrong after Buck's "after this, we're gonna go out looking for chicks" reaction, but man do I feel sorry for Buck. Him and Tommy might not be my end game (Buddie forever will be), but I do think this relationship could be good for our baby bi. Tommy being in the same profession, knowing what it's like to have this gap between who you are and the image of guys in your line of work, plus he's got more experience than Buck, is sure of himself, can help our boy figure himself out, and also Buck obviously does like his vibe. He deserves to be with someone he actually likes, not just the first woman willing to be with him that the plot pushed in his way.

Oh, baby Buck. :( You didn't even tell Maddie about Tommy. You really aren't ready it. But also (and as a Buddie shipper, more importantly), Tommy broke things off with Buck, but what is eating him up, is that he lied to Eddie. XD Yeah, this gonna end with wedding bells, sooner or later. On screen, off screen after the show ends with canon Buddie, or only in my head if 911 never dares make Buddie canon, I don't care. That kind of emotional devotion is not something that my hopelessly romantic heart can ignore.

OMG, this is how Buck comes out to Maddie? XD Via random pronoun mention, and as a by product of trying to figure out how to tell Eddie the truth? This is hilarious. lol It really makes it clear that, after all, the issue for Buck really isn't people knowing he is also dating guys (or checking their asses), even when it's the other closest person in the world for him, it's Eddie. Specifically. Buck's ready, even if he doesn't have the exact clear words yet, he's just not ready to tell Eddie. Can't imagine why. XDDD

What was that awkward post-sex scene with Eddie and Marisol? And the issues with her moving in are popping up a second after she has. But yeah, we have no idea who this woman is as a person, she's been a cardboard cut out so far, and then one of the first things we do learn about her, is that she would call her stuff better than Eddie's? Once again, this is not the stuff great romance is made of. Or... even just the stuff any kind of romance is made of.

Wait, Marisol was a nun, and Eddie didn't even know!? This whole ep is telegraphing in the news of how weird and awkward and underdeveloped this r/s is, not just for us as viewers who know nothing about Marisol, but apparently for Eddie as well.

And of course his Catholic guilt is gonna kick in now. I'd care, except 911 has given me absolutely no reason to. Seriously, I care more about Buck and Tommy after just 2 eps, than Eddie and Marisol, even though this is technically her 2nd season on the show.

Of course Buck went to find Eddie, and spotted him at the gym. Forever 201 vibes, with Eddie being the focus of Buck's attention. ^u^

I couldn't care less about Eddie's Catholic guilt crisis, and how it's actually a projection of what his real issues are with Marisol, but it's nice to see that as always, Buck's the one who can tell when something's off, and offer Eddie exactly what he needs (even when that's to talk to someone else, but Buck figures out immediately who the right person to address is), and then they just very naturally switch, because Eddie can also tell when something's off with Buck, and he wants to tell him something. Soulmates. THAT is the stuff that great romance IS made of.

:/ The imagery of Catholic nuns has not been around for over 2,000 years, please stop being ignorant about your own religion, and the very different way it looked in its early days.

Bobby is forgiven, he does give good advice, and his "her ex, the Lord" bit, which prompted that reaction from Eddie, is hilarious. XD

So... when Eddie is having issues with Marisol, he already knows he has to figure out how he feels about her, but instead of doing so, he goes to his safe place... Buck's loft.

Man, Eddie being into Tommy's choice of avoidning relationships with women, and hanging out with boys, after in the past, Eddie had dealt with his Shannon issues by running away from her, and re-enlisting in the army, where he gets to hang out with boys, when we all (Buck included) know why Tommy's "hanging out with boys"... I do like that if they want to (and hopefully they do), this further lays the groundwork for Eddie's own queer realization.

Buck and Eddie helping each other with their respective romantic problems, without realizing they are each other's respective romantic solution is gonna make me chew on my own fists. Again. But I'm not even a little bit surprised that Eddie was totally fine and accepting of Buck being bi, or that the first thing he thought of is how this reflects on them. Because their friendship IS way deeper and closer than normal for platonic friends, and Eddie's little reassurance is also an admission of that.

Man, for a second I was worried they also cut out Eddie in the loft, once more putting his thumb on Buck's pulse point possessively, in a perfect parallel to 303. I would have sued for emotional damages. But yeah, it says so much that the peak of emotional meaningfulness for Buck when coming out is in relation to Eddie, and that the scene itself peaks with Eddie, instead of finishing rushing out to take care of his own romantic business, hurries back to Buck first, to hug him, place his hand on Buck and give him orders. "Sure, you're gonna be dating this guy, but I'm still your real husband."

Well, at least Eddie amitted to himself and Marisol that he doesn't actually know her. But... I have never seen two people being both being so happy about not moving in together, and I'm supposed to think this r/s has a chance? Okay. Suuuure.

The scene with Buck going to Tommy to set things straight ready for something was lovely, it was nice seeing him excited, and get to choose, and hear he's wanted. But since the note Tommy and Buck's storyline in this ep should have ended on, is Buck showing Tommy he's ready enough to let others know he's dating a guy by inviting Tommy to come with Buck to Madney's wedding, then why is the very next scene playing the romantic switch again, making us think Buck's car just arrived at the wedding with him and Tommy, only for Buck and Eddie to walk in together? I see what you did there, 911.

Thank you for reading! If you're looking for more, you can find my s7 reactions tag here, and more of my Buddie meta and content in my pinned post. xoxox

[kittydragondraws]

well that happened, tadc reaction

stuffs under cut

yipee ads :D sick beats yoo new intro yipee silly pommi silly symbols is it just me or did things get… golder nauseating i think this is a dream, soo sobble oh my god this hurts to watch i don't like thit "i don't wanna play with you anymore" toy story vibes oof collission errors at their finest best girl raggy is it just me or did she get deeper?? man it's so much better watching yt on a laptop then phone "judging by what he's been teasing" FOURTH WALL BREAK canadaland BUBBLE!! local intorvert what's with the block? LARPing :,D he's so me frfr of he's smoking GUNNY ELEPPHANT MY FAVORITE THIIIING shiny manrqquiens kinda nice ngl awww kinger :D it's giving mario movie tbh "GOD" I'M CRYING AHAHAHAHHA ooooh amazing digital yuri she just like me frfr loloo kinda sweet i looove jax ha :D pomni is me jax is so slayful wacky sound effects i'ts only been thrity seconds but i love her already this si adorable WAIT SAD BACKSTORY GUMMIGOO jax has those n genes jesus christ bunny boy i swear i've seen that joke before babootka little arms georg gummigoo is precious jax is actually horrible kuh-nife jax is a masochist lesbian gangle real OH GOD NO RAGGY girly got inverted hot chokky, or diarreah i love colission errors NOO GUMMY COME BACK POOR GUMMY SAAAAVVVEEE HIIIIIIM that's not terrifying at all it's giving n learning he's a clone vibes exstestential horror yippee :D POMMY SAVE THE DINESAW you're in out of bounds dumass POOOR GUUUY NOOOO NAW WAAAAAAA D: data in a computer WAIT THEY CAN GET AWAY WITH THAT REFERENCE wow i hate this, i haaaaaate this jesus fuck my man she wouldn't last a day on copper 9 the keys come back i legit throught that was a nuke oreo wheels he's busy being emo i love his voice NO GUMMIGOO YOU'LL LIVE ON ON TURMBLR oh shit pomni therapy it's giving cabin fever oh i'm sad now YEES POMNI LET HIM COME WITH YOU CAINE WON'T MIND HAHAHAHAHAHHAAH (hyperfixating) his legs are so frucking weird bruh like yourself you worked at C&A i love him yipeeeeee colission glitches are best glitches fudge is nauseating nd i hate him md fans before a new ep: kinger why is your head in a bucket RAGATHA NO IT'S FINE SHE'S JUST IN THE ETHER kinger admin headcanon HE JUST DIED THEY MURDERED A GUY is there like a one vomit per episode requirement or sumting AWWW HE'S BEEEEST YEESSSSS GUMMIGOO GO SAVE YOUR MOMMA are they dancing? are those cahsews on the front? EVERYONE IS DEAD oh… my… god CAINE I HATE YOU CAINE CAINE CAINE I HATE YOU were her teeth clipping? ptsd flashbacks lol RAGATHA FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING GOOD PLEASE BE RIGHT oddly wholesome awww don't make me sad NO DIALOGUE? GOOSE YOU COWARD! awwwww wait noooooo this iiiissss sweeeeet I WANNA GUMMIGOOOO PLUSHIE jax looking pretty neat ngl

[15ktherapy]

no one gave me an answer but I’m doing my rant anyway. okay so. if he rlly said that about that video he made where he dedicates a whole segment of bashing dream.

“I had a bad day, I wanted to be mean”

1. do u know how hard dream or dteam in Gen would get massacred if the fucking spoke on someone like that and went “but I had a bad day :(“

2. I know u got big when you were like sixteen but did all that fame seriously fucking stop you from developing a realization that your problems shouldn’t be everyone elses? that Oh No Something Bad Happened To Me Something Bad Must Happen To Someone Else.

3. like. ur just a bad person. “I had a bad day so I decided to bash this guy who I’m supposed to be friends with to my millions of fans— a majority of which Hate Him. Really Really Fucking Hate Him. but it’s okay the consequences this is going to have because I, POOR LOTTLE MILLIONARE CISHET WHITE BOY, HAD A BAD DAY :(“ GO LOOK AT YOUR FUCKING BANK ACCOUNT IF UR JUST THAT SAD YOU FUCKING TWIT.

Wow I Had A Bad Day So I Have To Ruin Someone Else’s. ur sooooo mature aren’t you? bad things happen to me so bad things have to happen to someone else because IIIII Don’t Deserve To Be The Only One Syffering.

you stupid fucking immature, inconsiderate, self absorbed little freak.

I wish I had the fucking mentality to have something bad happen to me and so much as accordingly take it out on people who actually deserve it. but I don’t. because I’m not fucking stupid and I realize that my ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES. you can fucking kick a dog and expect it to continue to love you, to not fear you, to not bite you. you can’t fucking go to the dog next day like Yeah Sorry Mate I Kicked You Because I Stubbed My Toe And It Hurt And I Wanted To Enact Pain On Something Else Because I Huuuurttttt :(((((.

I WISH I had the audacity to fucking go “ohhhh pooor meeee… I’m gonna go set someone’s house on fire” but fortunately, I’m not a FUCKING MORON.

THE FUCKING AUDACITY. TO BE SO FUCKING SELF ABSORBED TO GO “yeah but I had a bad day so I wanted to be mean” congrats you spoiled child, you can’t even be considerate of other people feelings. Grow the fuck up.

[wench-and-jezebel]

Dark Angel Reaction: Art Attack

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) reacts [with occasional asides by Wench (@scripted-downfall)

We had spare time before this episode, so have fun with our bonus content! Link available here!

– – –

["Must be a guy thing" Ah, yes, women don't exercise]  Or a decent person thing, ya know

[OH YEAH THERE'S APPARENTLY A FAMILIAR FACE IN THIS!  @witchy-writer-lady told me abt it]

The circles that have been talked in this scene  [Ma'am calling him out on circular sentences like she doesn't do that constantly]

There is plenty more romantic.  Weddings are so overrated and expensive ☠️☠️🤣

“Why not?”  OC!

🤣🤣🤣 This woman deserves to have her dress stolen if she didn’t notice it gone from two feet away [asdfkjalfdkj you're not wrong]  She’s blind as hell with both eyes intact ☠️☠️☠️

Oh Sketch noooooo

Get ‘em OC  [No "Get 'em Normal"?]  HES SO MEANNNN ☠️☠️☠️☠️  [You do realize NoBody there does Any work right alkdsjf]  That’s true 🤣🤣  [Not even Alec, love him as I do alskdfj]  Oooooof  [He legit just sits there chatting with Normal about boxing the whole time.  Or delivering single packages]

Oh! Hello Logan!

NORMAL 🤣🤣🤣

His little “hm she’s aight” look

[This was me earlier today!!!  I understand his aversion to public speaking  aslkdfj]  ☠️☠️☠️ Moood

Oh Buddy

[His look at her alskdfj]  Their little exchange was cute tho  ['sigh' This is true]

Poor Normal  [I knowwww!  Will the hostage situations never stop?]  Right?!?

[An actual coherent monologue alkdsjfa]

Loooool I thought the brother was Palmer (Ducky’s Assistant you haven’t met yet)  [idk for sure but that's not the pertinent one… Watch for Daphne]

Poor Max done got put in her feelings

Le gasp  [Oh, last name drop!  I forgot Max's last name was on screen.  I don't think Alec's is]

Ooop! We get more jam pony

He said ten bucks  [tbf, they are in an economic depression]  True 🤣🤣

[Normal be lying abt the bip-bip-bip-ing]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Poor buddy can’t have a good family!  Oooof

Was that SPN Mary?  [Yup!]  Le gasp

Oooooof jealousy

[That was a painfully fake smile, Max]

[Also this be the plot to your Nomral fic.  But more guns.  And less love life.  And Normal's in a leather jacket and not a bathrobe]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Oh boy: Logan done put his foot in his mouth

[I'm cringing in preparation for this ep btw.  Heads-up]  Oh noooo

– – –

Jezebel: Midpoint!

Wench: Bravo!  Ma'am remembered better than I… do go on!

Jezebel: Ok so first off it’s a Jam Pony ep which has proven to be some of my favorites!  And I swear I love a “I don’t like this person but I don’t hate this person so I’ll help” storyline

Wench: Poor Normal alskdjf

Jezebel: Yusss.  Alsoooo POOOR LOGANNNNNN!  BUT MAX TAKING UP FOR HIM WAS ADORABLE, IM SORRYYYY!!  But then here comes Mary-

Wench: Daphne

Jezebel: I know 🤣

Wench: Hmph

Jezebel: -and just threw a wrench right in it

Wench: And finally the jump I paused it on  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️  In that dress… Just…. Wot ☠️🤣🤣☠️☠️

Wench: Apparently we have lots of photos to give y’all this time alskdfj On we go!

– – –

I swear ☠️ The dress makes the jumps look so bad ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Oooof

Mood max

[Okay but he lost his job because of the messenger service so-]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Buddy she’s no angel

Bruh CAN NO ONE KEEP UP WITH SHIT  [I mean.  Technically she just.  Decided to leave with it]  FAIR

[Remember when I said I was.  preemptively cringing.]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️oh shit the second hand embarrassment

[Poor Normal expecting to get killed tho]  Ooop Normal reality check on being a good person lol  [Let it be known, btw, that Normal in s2 has very good moments and very BAD moments.  I recognize this.  But for now I'm enjoying his minorly-asshole-ish-but-no-worse bits.]

This man and his bitch slaps

I love "defenstration"... it's one of my favorite words

Poooor Normal

[Have fun.  I'm.  Not watching btw.  Tell me when the speech is over plz.  I'm.  I have it muted.]  I have it turned down☠️  I’m still cringing at the faces

This.  Is Tony coming out of Logan

Max coming through again  [Okay, now you're uber-whacked; technically she only came through because she caused the problem in the first place by not handing the paper back]  Fair  [This is the one non-anti-Max comment you've made that I don't agree with]  🤣🤣🤣

[This.  Is an NCIS episode.]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️  ["I've got a military vessel heading out to-"]

A ghostttt  [Max disappearing: Cas-coded]

Oooooop-  [Plz let DaphMary be a lesbian]  SBC… If not OC GON make her one

[This whole dress thing is so ridiculously unrealistic.  It's pulling me out of the story.  She definitely smells like trash and yet no one seems to notice; she's bound to have it all dirty, stained, and ripped, and yet she's acting like she's gonna return it... just wot]

OOOOF  THAT WOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TODAY

[Showing off her powers again 'sigh']

☠️☠️☠️☠️  [She (Max) annoys me]  Fair

Oh boy

OC 🤣🤣  [Um.  DaphMary looking like she was heading over to OC as soon as she caught the bouquet.]  RIGHT

[Um.  UM.  THEY ACTUALLY DID THAT!!!  DAPHMARY I FREAKING LOVE YOU]  Oooooop!  Dean’s getting a new momma.  [Well, he always seems to lose one, so he needs two]  Oooof  ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Ooop-  Somethings missing on miss presses neck 🙂

“You first”  Heart eyes

[I.  I think we found out why she dumped him… Lickity-chicks]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️  Logan’s not clueless I love it  [This is true!]

Dawwwww!  Genuine smile!  [I will give you that Max/Logan are good in this scene]  

Another dawwwww

Le gasp

Buddy HOW BOUT YOU NOT  [HE WAS TESTING IT]  “My feet work again… Lemme break em”

– – –

Jezebel: Ok! End point! 🙃 Jam pony still are my all time favorites! Like you said it’s the Normal fic but make the girl a painting ☠️☠️ and the depression is his, you know, will to live.

Wench: lkjlkj;lkj oof

Jezebel: Also Logan was adorable in this one.  Very Tony-esque.  And his family sucks.

Wench: All true

Jezebel: But DAPHNE(MARY) 😮‍💨💕 love herrrr!

Wench: I KNOW!  I FORGOT THEY DID THAT AND JUST.  GOLD

Jezebel: OC really just be coming in and swooping up all the ladies.  Also, Max was annoying but her taking the necklace made me happy. So *sigh* 😤  I’m conflicted

Wench: This is fair!  To be honest, she’s not as bad in s1 as she is in s2.  It’s her dynamic there that causes the issue.

Jezebel: Ending note. Catlike jumping in leather = meh, goofy but believable / catlike jumping in fancy schmancy dress = the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen

[portraitoftheoddity]

Steve: Look, I'm not depressed, I shaved the depression beard!

Natasha: ...

Steve: *cries in half the shots*

Steve: *is gonna curl up and die if this doesn't work*

[9d00m]

my pooor poor boy

[sluttyminghao]

Heyyy bestie is me 🍘 anon ( again ) ... I had a thought about sub seokmin having a praising kink .... and I can't get it out of my head ...like I have this picture in my head where the reader praises him for being such a good boy and holding is cum in and not cuming without permission but the praise gets him soo riled up he suddenly cums without permission and then gets punished

a friend of mine told me Mingyu posted on insta and me a screen shot of the 2nd pic which was ok to an extent ... but then I logged in to insta and saw the ACTUAL PIC .. OMG WHYY .. mY POoR PooOr hearT ..... uuUhHFffffF

- 🍘 ANON

the mingyu pic was...really something else huh

[stonerbughead]

Maria watches friday night lights (#10)

Ahhh this season is so good, I’m not ready for it to end! This post covers the penultimate episodes: 3x11 - 3x12

-oh boyyy Lyla’s getting drunk to deal with her daddy issues. Real! Tho it is nice seeing Billy, Lyla, Tim, and Mindy getting along I guess? Sigh.

-HAHAHA poor Tyra being forced to throw Mindy a “tea party” bridal shower.

-let’s maybe NOT call your son’s 15 year old girlfriend a “minx” or a “plague,” Joe McCoy?!?!

-oh Matt :( taking out his anger and emotions about his grandma’s deteriorating health on his mom :( this is so hard

-oooooh this redistricting plotline is such an interesting shake up!! Holy shit these fully grown men standing around a table redrawing the redistricting line to “keep the Dillon Panthers intact” is truly wild.

-I really like this scene where Lyla breaks down to Tim about letting her mom and siblings move to California without her and feeling like she has no family now that Buddy has hurt her. I feel like too many teen dramas have a teen character’s family move away and never show it affecting them which feels wholly unrealistic.

-I have to believe Texas weather around semifinals time actually lends itself to dramatic pouring rain?? Bc I mean, it WORKS but this happened in S1 too right?

“He’s got to do what the coach tells him to do!” Thank you Katie McCoy. You need to get away from your terrible, controlling husband. Like, even when they win this dude isn’t happy bc it didn’t happen the WAY he thought it should.

-omfg I just gasped when JD’s dad called Madison a “tramp.” WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU

-and of course Tami and Eric are seated in the window of Applebee’s seeing the abuse happen and run out to help. You know who Tami and Eric remind me of (except they’re better): Kirsten and Sandy Cohen of the OC. It’s that “parents of everyone, moral compass of the community” trope. Honestly like, the only good teen drama parent trope. (To a similar extent I guess Mary and Fred Andrews’ play/ed that role on Riverdale)

“I think I’m okay here, hanging with my gal” - Tim Riggins is such a romantic boy wow. His pep talk for Lyla about going to college despite her dad’s bullshit was so precious.

“He hit my baby.” Oh pooor Katie McCoy, you need to get yourself and your boy away from your husband.

-lol when’s the last time we saw Gracie? Julie’s been absent this ep, she babysitting? Hahaha

-oh yes Tyra deserves this beautiful pep talk from her mom!!

-good on this show for naming what Joe McCoy did as “child abuse” bc YEP. Tami and Eric feeling awful about calling CPS (but being mandated to do so as educators) is such a real and well done conflict.

-omg Matt’s art portfolio!! He wants to go to Chicago for art! I just love the image of Tami, Julie, and Matt flipping through his portfolio ugh yes. Soft.

“It reads like a five page needlepoint pillow.” Lmao Landry and yeah, writing the college essay sucks.

“They have the biggest Van Gogh collection.” Saracen’s a man after my own heart.

FYI I left and Jeff gave me a dab that hit hard (I dramatically said it “killed me”) so the rest of 3x12 and the post was composed whilst I’m even more stoned than usual.

-wow Landry missing the bus the ONE time he drinks damn

-hey I’ve never seen this coach leading the chants on the bus before. Is this like his whole job

-awww Lorraine asking Julie if Matt likes art and she’s like, yeah he loves it! And he’s amazing at it. So cute. Oh wow both of them agreeing they don’t want to “hold him back from anything.”

-My heart! This show does such a good job of showing so many heartwarming dynamics of all kinds.

-ooookay Katie I get why you don’t want to be friends with Tami anymore....but like y’all need parenting classes, your husband is straight up abusive to your child. Also I’m scared for you, please leave that man

-OMFG Tyra lost her virginity at THIRTEEN? That’s so heartbreaking. Also everything she’s screaming about in the car needs to start going into this college essay. Omg is she gonna write about Jason Street getting paralyzed? Real. How many people in this town do you think used that in their college essay?

-Tim and Matt scene THANK YOU I am blessed

-omfg Tyra reading her essay out loud to Landry overlaying Tami and Eric on the field; Julie with baby grace; Saracen and Tim throwing the frisbee; the raucous Colette-riggins family in the car. Beautiful!!! Perfection.

-lol I saw the year 2008 on the game board and realized if this was fall 2008...I was a freshman in high school. JD is my peer.

-omg Joe McCoy has THE douchebag glasses. Classic child abuser am I right

-JD throwing a fit on the field is good fucking characterization bc you mimic what your parents do, especially when you’re a 15 year old kid

-OH SHIT SARACEN’S GOING IN AS QUARTERBACK FOR HIS LAST HALF EVER AS A HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL PLAYER??? The drama! The writing!

-YALL I am out here white knuckling it through this state game and I barely understand football and yet...I’m like wow really all you need to do to get me interested in a sport is make me care about the characters playing. Saracen and riggins are working so well together I cry

-damn what a way to go down. They actually turned the game around and a field goal is what made them lose :(

“I wanted everyone’s friends and families to be here tonight when I say this: I have never been more proud of a team than I am right now” oh Eric Taylor what a man

“There’s not a single person in this room who’s ever gonna be the same”’ wow I felt that

-Riggins always seems more contemplative in a Sherpa

[killadelphias]

real sad stuff about pets under cut

so my very old very sick cat who is my best friend is doing very very bad and is probably on the way out and i’m really trying not to have a mental breakdown about it

last time i lost a pet it was a dog i had for 14 years and that was 8 years ago and i was fucked up over that for a really long time. this guy is my cat, my little buddy. seeing him so frail and sad just has me tearing up constantly and i keep panicking in the middle of the night thinking he’s died and running down to the basement to see him. every time my phone rings when I'm out i start to panic thinking it’s a parent calling with bad news. i really can’t handle this but he probably doesn’t have much longer and i can’t make the call myself. 17 years. 

he doesn’t really come up to my room much anymore, and after 2 straight years of him sleeping nightly on my bed i’ve become really codependent on him and it’s gonna be devastating. tonight i sat with him for a very long time, petting his head like he likes, felt him purr for the first time in a while. and he rubbed his face on my leg and i haven’t stopped crying since then. this is really depressing and sappy but honestly my relationship with my cat right now is like ET and the boy in the movie with the dependent emotions and whatnot yikes i’m so dramatic and ridiculous even in the midst of a tragedy… 

[xserpentlife]

3.16  Reaction - SPOILERS

Raw reaction no editing to this so it is not grammatically correct and spelling is not checked.

Hermione madddd

Kevin’s sellin it 

Ooooo we gettin in already 

Awwww noooo Reggie quit

Ooooooooooo Josie did that 

I’m living for this honestly like 

ok little dance sequence

SWEETS SAMG OKE SMALL LIKE AND IM ALREADY LIKE MY BOYYYYY

the sass in sweets saying bad boy love interest has me rolling

Betty is sooooo done 

CANDY STORE 

OKAYYYYYY

OKAY TONI DANCE BATTLE HELLO 

ORGANIZING SWEET PEAS SOLO EVELYN YOU SAY THAY YOU BETTER FOLLOW THROIGH I MAY HATE YOU BUT ILL HATE YOU MORE 

ransacked tent city ok

Why TF are they seperating wth 

O SHIT DIS HE FIND OUT 

ima take a bath ok you do that

PARTYYTY

Okay yeah let’s hello shot woth blue jello, does anyone else thinksnit looks like what’s been killing everyone like wtf

Okay dancing 

Veronica and Reggie oo

PEA AND FANGS MY BBYS the bromance

SWEETS MADDDDDD

Cheryl salty

I’m living hoenstly likeeeee

OH VERONICA AND REGGIE

endgame 😂😂😂

Organic brownie w/ mushrooms HE BOUTTA BE TRIPPPPIN

POOR KEV OMG 

Evelyn you ain’t s therapist sit the fuck down 

dude you ain’t haunted

Pooor fangssssssss awwwwww

Side note fsngs arms helloooo

SWEETS DID THATTTTTTTT OOOOO SHITTTTTTT NAMES AND EVERYTHING OKAYYYYYYY

DUDE REGGiE JUST USED “all in” I’m sorry conspiracy that him and sweets are related like not That I believe that but wth

Look at Reggie being the smart one 👏🏼

The fuck Evelyn tf you tellin Cheryl poppopin oit like thsy 

Oh Christ 💋 I’m red 

Wtf Cheryl chill girl 

DEAD GIRL WLAKIKG MY FAVVV

SWEETS BETTER SING A PARTTT I SWEARRRR

OKAY FLSNNEL OFF OH MY GOD IS THIS ABOUT A THREESOME JESUS CHRIST AND WITH TONI WHAT IN THE ACTUSL FUCK

BELT OFFFFF HOLY FUK 

IMA NEEES SOMEOKE TO MAKE GIFS OF THAG LIKEEEEE NOWWWWWWW THIS SECOND LIKE HOLY SHITTTTT

o my

Is that literally them counting him as being in dead girl walking cause he literally said waht two words wtf 

SELECT REHEARSAL EVELYN I SWEAR 

fangs ughhhhhhhhhh

Yo they boutta kisss

YEA DREW SIG YOUR SO GOOOOD HOLY CRAPPPPPPPP

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THEY KISSED WVEN THOUFH I HATW THAT THE FARM THE KISSSSS THO

yo wait though are they married now or like etc was that some induction thing like whatbis happeneing 

You real sweaty there arch 

Oh so now the pricinple w/ the farm tooo 🙄

They goin to junkyard Againn

A real conversation thank godddddd

Awww the trailer 

Is sweets boutta sing????? Nope didn’t think so false hope it’s cool

SEVENTEEEEEEN

Kinda llivimf for Betty and jug in this moment thooo OH GOT THE CSNT WE BE SEVENTEEN HARMONYYYYYY

I’m just gonna say this cute and shit but your dancing in a literally drug lab so maybe get out 

Poor Jug tho 

Betty like Jughead let it go and he’s like never heard that 

Veronica cryin hiram Max affffff

He brought his painting 😂😂😂

Is it bad I kinda don’t care bout her solo like I’m glad but also other people should’ve had solos *cough* sweet pea *cough*

I mean it’s good tho like not gonna lie 

HOW IS THIS ALREADY 50 MINS IN LIKE WHAT

Tweaked out fizzle head 😂😂😂😂

Oh stfu Gladys you liar 

She has to know what he’s planning like Gladys ain’t dumb 

The backstage thooo 

Ew sweets don’t sign her shit 

Fangs jumpin is cute af tho 

Jug is like My line he’s like WTF 😂😂😂

Burn it downnnnnnnn

Sweets and fangs BETTER SING IN THIS I SWEAR 

CAN WE STOP PANNING OVER THE COFE FOUR LIKE IDGAF I WANNA SEE OTHER PEOPLE

FUCKING EDGAR EVERNEVERRRRRRRR Jesus Christ thaycidna lot of fuckin farm people this is weird as shit 

Everyone’s like wtffffffffff

That’s it

I feel cheated first the fuck of all Jordan plays Fucking JD and barely sings two likes like wtf also why the fuck have we not figured out NM

Thank god he isn’t dead tho but let’s be honest it may be false hope so who tf knows 

[chasingxkars]

seeing new merch from dan and phil shop and looking at my wallet like "ohmagahd shame on u" :( 🎶 im just a pooor boy nobody loves me (even my money haha)🎶

BUT I WAAAAANT TO HAVE ONE OF THOSE KNITTTTED JUMPERRRRS HUHUHU ☹☹☹☹☹ help me, im poor ☹ friends wer r u ☹

[icedtxe]

AAAAWWWWH POOOR YOONGI BABY

my poor bby boy, no wonder hes so damn salty

[the-firebird69]

and this was our house...and he had a few for a moment each.. it is disgustinghe isworth so much and we all treat himbadly and think he  awishing tree this is so stupid dave and we agree your mean andonry so what your idiots andanimals we do our best to help and ours to. this sucks he sys it you show up slaughter your ownyourso dubm tday and in unis lol. michelle weused toown ferrero and it wentto this idiottommy f..your broke andstuf fsoon you willbe. poor performance sad too. you hadit and lostit fast. tis is itiwantyou out tommy f i startlooking andwill placeapplciations tommorrow these wont getout so iwillmove andnottpuntagorda okdimwit Zues Hera finedoso tommy f yeh. and meanwhilewetake your areas..your a dunce right you canlose and yell shout screm orders we pracice need to Zues Hera and we do that put bases in his areas needed it adn themotivationandhe messes with the monetary system every few seconds so we do this to him he is a rampid asshole...and huge loser Thor Freya i mean tommy really, you  are  a dimwit now forreal away form me sucker wetake the titale hold it Bitol? Zues Hera wedo so and your licenses and moer are ours we alreadh showedyou and ownershop now tonight we take it you out not him...so f you tommy f. Bitol & Bitol so i findyou lawyer and hit tommy f try to Violator and we seeyour himnow why tommy f i am a DemiGod and you  are  a nitwit,aways ask like bja Violator timeto dance big fella  tommy f  and fuck off tommy f your dead andyour famiy and we hve themand your cansmen you want totalk to themou faggot shit you andyour airheadpushpush it is ike fuck you this has always been a sensativf biz andyour ddumb fag ass in china japan and korea havingme walk pooor on the street for weekas ou fucking dead asshole...i put the hiton you you complete failure you suck at your job homo hyou want retards you live with them now and stay fthe f away you come here we take all yourstuff no way we do it nw we take it and he arrives we triple itto forcehim out Zues Hera we getit your in chargeof what and so on so blab tommy f you aer not and you say you are...we puoll you out ofyour post in the treasury show trump what you do to himand idiot veep..now Gu will arrive shortly...and deliver a packet pics  and witnesses and  more you fn faggot you are a complete whore do you know it loser. puoshonly and blindly and wreck yourown stuff traitor really and your ties to onorth korea would be nice to expose  huh and fullbird coloonel yes im  a witness...you were in there paying hermoney and stuff while on th comm job and yeh there weretop secetthings at rfmd...so blow itourt your ass trump saw it too... Zues Hera we want tohurt you tommy f your a loser a louse and suck at your job push itand push it and all is breaking and giong what are you doing to my areas your inane you fagout too get out... trump we want you out as well this is insnace your insance yourbrothers say you are and ou are walberg and our nuts...heavily shitheaded ok and you dont tke it fromnoboyd andhe is always bothered always inpain and youdidittohismm say he ismom your dead tommy  f you are the judge we hityou now biden and you talk talk like  a bitchtoo...you have NO saavy means we explain it toyou now and i got it approved my men bring th erain to youidiot faggot house hyou willbe seerely dsiciplined hog faggot Zues Hera we fire in ten nine 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 bombs away, talk now chatterer. talk.  he squalks it is good weuse it and tickler file created and Thor says hit him with all the jice we do take what he took now and hold itfrommac daddys usinghis complete arrogance Duke Nukem Blockbuster letme say macs this is for thebirds you arenot invntors nor do you hv a computer that wever will or program  i amnot your boy or doggie and you owememeny and imy money is mine youtiedup and you are done..i request Wie my grandady investigate your little selves furtherfor source as i know it is and bja and then you will die and rest and stop your space cadet crap..off our channel or  i useyou and your bodies to cordon off yourkids and kill themall as we are...suckers shutu p fags Zues Hera this is anevre in my house tommy f not your house boy Zues Hera wehave the title  Bitol and Goddess Wife wekic you out of casl tomorrow youwill see why you are a criminal we forwearded it to your local police they watch for you we target you all night and day as do pence and trump. loser

[worldsandcenturiesfunposting]

Trump’s Bad Day : ( A Political Fanfiction for Intellectuals

It was another day in the White House and President Trump was not happy. As per usual, he woke up before the sun even rose to take his routine shit and Twitter time. Unlike those loser Presidents from the past, Trump knew the best method of proclaiming his word to the masses was at 140 characters at a time. If that’s how much he’s able to read, certainly it must be how much the rest of the country is capable of as well.

He looked around the historic building, clenching his butt cheeks in hopes of making it to the restroom on time. Unfortunately, he couldn’t find his phone! He looked under his high chair but couldn’t find it nor did he find it on his desk underneath the multitude of crayon’d in pages of the 2016 election results. It wasn’t even in that special spot in Ivanka’s room that coincidentally gave whatever’s placed there a perfect view of where she changes. 

The excruciating exercise he went through searching for it was draining his limited life force. His hands sweated greatly, unable to even grasp the big boy little spoons he uses to eat his delicious two scoops. The dye in his hair was starting to run down his face, making him look like an orange/lemon blend. 

At last, he couldn’t take it anymore. He slumped over on the floor and had to finally release himself. It was the same feeling he got when he passed legislations.

When the sun rose and the rest of the staff attended to their duties, Mike Pence found both Trump and Bannon sleeping on top of one another. At some point while it was still dark, the head of Brietbart drunkenly stumbled in, tripped on his boss, and fell asleep as well. When trying to remove the ungodly mix of alcohol and adipose tissue of of the President, Pence once again smelled a horrid odor that was all too familiar with him after these 100-something days of Trump’s presidency. 

“Donald, again?” He sighed. 

Even in sleep, Trump giggled.

It wasn’t until an hour later that Trump was dragged back to his room, cleaned, changed, and given a set of new clothes. Pence insisted he wear a normal tie that day but Trump refused to abide.

“I want the long one!”

“You can’t wear the long one, Donald. It’s too long. You’ll trip over it!”

“I WANT THE BIG BOY TIE!”

A familiar site to the electroshock therapy enthusiast, Trump started jumping up and down in a fit of rage. At times, he’d run over to the wall and start pounding on it, making such little noise, it was as if a fly had slammed into it. 

“BIG TIE BIG TIE BIG TIE BIG TIE BIG TIE-”

He droned on and on, and tears started to stream down his face. finally Pence threw his hands in the air and said “Alright! Fuck it! You can have the big boy tie!”

Like a flick of a switch, Trump stopped his tantrum and beamed a huge grin in Pence’s direction. “I’m a bigly good deal maker, Pence. You should know this.” He pointed at his VP and snatched the tie from his hands. 

“If only you could negotiate a law to kill the faggots, Trump.”

“I’ll make that deal when the dems stop obst-obstric-ob-ob...blocking me!”

“The dems are the minority in everything, Trump. They have no real control over congress or the senate or anything!”

“Killery’s emails say that the deep state is actually controlling them. Don’t you read Bread-bart?”

--

When they walked out, they found Bannon in the same spot on the floor. Somehow in his sleep, the man managed to gather dozens of bottles of gin seemingly out of thin air. Groggily, he started to get up.

“Uh bu ughuhu...are the fuckin’ kikes dead yet?”

“No, Bannon.” Pence replied dryly. 

“Thosuh fugg fuking guh hook noses th-I ughu I wish the Holocaust was real fo then uthu would be gon!”

“That’s nice, Bannon. We need you to help Trump sign a bill for our corporate masters.”

“It’s going to be a biiiiiiigly bill, Uncle Bannon!”

Bannon complied. He pissed himself first, but ultimately he stumbled behind the two which made Donald giggle over how silly his uncle was being. All the while Bannon was trying to tell Donald about how the white race was being bred out of existence and how to use secret code words like ‘N1gger’ or ‘k1ke’ to trick normies into spreading nazi propaganda. his words weren’t at all clear and Donald simply giggled most of the time, but somewhere in Trump’s mind, he was absorbing that information.

Before Bannon could call for a race war, he slumped over again and threw up on the back of Pence’s shoes before falling sleep entirely.

“Uh oh, Uncle Bannon had an accident!”

Pence remained silent, seething to himself that one day congress will stop worrying about what a bunch of frog posters thought of them and impeach Trump. How much longer must I endure this? Dead God! Dear mother! Someone help!

They continued on. Trump skipped the whole say singing ‘Bigly bill’ over and over and occasionally telling Pence he had to sing along. 

When they arrived in the oval office, Trump ran over to his seat, lost breath half way, sharted, and then walked the rest of the way. With a wet plop, he sat down and banged his fist on the desk.

“No more fun and games. It’s time to put my big boy pants on and do some work!”

Pence walked up behind Trump and reached into a drawer, brushing aside many drawings of Trump punching Hillary and pulled out the bill his boss was supposed to sign. 

“What’s the bill, Mike?”

“Fuck the poor, take away their health care and let them fucking die by Paul Ryan.”

“Paul Ronald? I love that guy!”

Pence’s eye twitched. In his mind, he was at a cross roads between screaming about homosexuality and letting Trump’s little outburst slip. He knew his pussy grabbing boss was a good Christian who didn’t approve of gays, but what he said disturbed him on a spiritual level.

“I mean, he’s not me or anything, but Paul Renalds, I know him. He’s a great guy, believe me. I remember when I met him, I met him way back ago, he said I was supposed to be President because he knows a good deal maker when he sees one. I make the best deals, believe me, they’re the best. My deals with Paul Rogers, he looks at my deals and he agrees to them because they’re the best. Believe me, Paul Roomba, he knows my deals. This deal here, it’s the best. The best deal. And his eyes are cute!”

Pence finally had to excuse himself, leaving the President alone to sign the bill. It occurred to Trump how strange the situation was. Normally when he signs bills into law, he has everyone stand in the room with him so they can congratulate him on what a big boy thing he was doing. Where was everyone?

“This was supposed to be a bigly moment. I want my praise!” He whined and screamed and pounded, but no one came in. Not even his famous tantrumps would sway the universe this time.

Slowly the gears in his head started turning His buddies in the GOP really tried to push this bill through fast. Kushner said they were doing it before Hillary emails about it on her private server. What was so special about the bill?

He reached over on his desk and grasped it in his hands. Squinting his eyes, for the first time in years he tried to read. “F-f-fuuuuuck t-tha pooor, tac...tic? Take! Take away thi-thir? Heat-ha...”

Sweat dripped from his brow as he slowly stumbled through the title. “bie..Pool Reean...Oh Pool Ransom! I love that guy! I made a deal with him earlier, and he agreed to it saying I make the best deals. The best. I remember making a deal in Saudeyrabba with those darkies, I gave them bigly amounts of weapons for money. Such a good deal. The best deal, believe me. The un were mad for some crap about human rights or whatever, but they’re just liblosers who don’t know good deals. Not like me, I make the best deals. Like I made a deal with Bannon the other day, it was such a good deal! The best and...oh shoot! I lost my place!” He sighed heavily and moved his eyes to the top of the page. 

Hours later, Pence came in, having obtained written permission by his wife to be able to hear any vaguely homosexual things from Trump even if she isn’t there. “Have you signed the bill yet, sir?”

“By pool Reea-Mikey! You made me lose my place! I don’t wanna lose like Shillery!”

--

Ultimately the bill wasn’t signed that day. Trump got bored of reading and instead drew a picture of his magnificent wall on the back. Completely irate but trying to keep his cool, Pence congratulated Trump on the wonderful drawing and said they could try again tomorrow while he stuck the picture to the fridge with all the other bills Donald didn’t sign. 

Their moment was interrupted by Kusher whose voice I have no idea what it sounds like so I’m assuming it sounds something like Kermit the Frog. He came in and stomped his foot. “Daaaaaaaaaady! The feds are being mean to me!” 

In Trump’s mind, he was so flattered. Kusher reminded Trump of himself when he was younger and asking his own father for a tiny loan of a million dollars. Ivanka, that hot piece of ass, really knows how to pick a man. But wait! If Ivanka picked Kushner, then she didn’t pick him! He was getting cucked! Uncle Bannon was right! Kusher was a dirty penny pinching jew boy who should be shoved in the oven and turned into a cake!

“Now Kusher, you know what I told you about handling the deep state.”

“Daaaaad, sending my body guard over to fire their leader didn’t work for meeeeeeee!”

“Kushner, if it worked for me, it’s bigly good. The best idea, believe me. I remember when Comey was giving me trouble, trying to investigate me and Russia. My relations with Putin, I don’t have them. I may have talked to him and agreed to win the election for him so he can systematically destroy the US from the inside out by telling me to appoint the most egregiously incompetent and malicious cabinet in presidential history who have a vested interest in destroying the very organizations they were chosen to run thus ensuring the US has very little power or influence over the world and weakening the pressure put on Russia which in turn would allow Putin to gain more influence over others...buuuuuuut I never met him, believe me! Bigly no no on meeting him!”

“Well if you don’t help me with this then I’ll I’ll I’ll I’ll I’ll tell Ivanka!”

Trump leaped in the air. “Not Ivanka!”

“T-That’s right! I’ll tell her about this, daddy!”

“Okay okay! I’ll help!”

He ran out of the kitchen and out of the White House doors. For the first time, he had enough energy to do so. The prospect of losing his daughter’s affection would drive a man to do anything. At least that’s what Trump thought. When he was on the White House lawn, he finally stopped and wondered.

“Where does the feds work again? Gosh, who knew government could be so complicated?”

--

Dinner in the White House was supposed to be a special time. Everyone was gathered around ready to congratulate Trump on signing the bill and ensuring thousands of people would die, but were sorely disappointed when the learned that Trump tried to actually read the bill, failed to get past the title, and gave up. Still, they had to congratulate him lest the man throw another tantrump and ruin the dinner.

“An amazing job, your highness!” Rence Preibus said, raising his glass. 

“Your leadership is the best! Way better than that fucking nigger was. One day, I’m going to go to his house and put a bullet in his nigglet kids, but your kids, you have the best genes. We’re the master race, Trump!” A keebler elf said. Most people call him Jess Sessions. 

“I...have to use the restroo-” General Mattis was about to say before getting cut off. 

“Those fucking niggers, can you believe they were in here? Once I roll back the war on drugs, all of those shit skins are going away. Every fuckin’ one of them!” 

“Anyways, I’m going to leave n-”

“And the mexicans? They’re nigger lite! They’ll get it too. I’ll fuckin’ arrest them all! I swear on me lucky charms, I’ll fuckin’ arrest them all like the rabid squirrels who attacked my magical woodland kingdom. Those squirrels were fuckin’ niggers!”

Kelly Conway was ready to speak up. She was assured that there were no microwaves in the room at the moment. However, Mike Pence stopped her. “Women are to be seen, not heard, Kelly.”

“I for one am very happy for you, Trump. Not even Hitler was able to pass legislation!” Spicer beamed.

Bannon slammed both fists on the table. “Are you sayin’ tha h- *hic* Hitler, MY FUHRER, isn’t good enough?” He was ready to crawl up and strangle Spicer. “M-I-ighguhu va da b-both of us u-ughnggh”

Not even able to present a coherent thought, he passed out on his mashed potatoes. Kusher rose from his seat and pulled out a sharpie from his pocket, drawing several Stars of David on the drunk’s face. 

A turtle spoke up. “I’m sorry you weren’t able to pass our health care bill, but you’ll get it next time! We’ll get rid of those poor people together, and it’ll be your victory!” McConnell tried his best to hide his burning anger. Those poors will get to live another day because of his. Paul Ryan looked him in the eyes and nodded knowingly. Both of their dreams were squashed. 

“I dreamed about taking away health care from poor people since my college days,” Ryan said, “with you in charge, we’ll surely do that!”

Everyone else sang their praises, and then began to feast. Only Pence and Trump didn’t eat. The former because his wife hadn’t given him permission yet and the latter because when he looked down, he noticed that his food wasn’t a well done steak with extra ketchup but instead a massive log of shit. 

“COMEY!” He shouted, flipping his plate onto Pence. “He did this! He’s always doing this! Why does he keep bullying me! I want him to stop now now now now now!”

Pence tried to comfort him. “How do you know it was Comey, sir?”

“Because he’s a fuckin’ meanie!”

“You fired him weeks ago. he doesn’t have access to our kitchen.”

“He used the deep state to do it! I know it! The whole thing’s rigged! Bigly bad!”

Trump started to straight up cry and rolled out of his high chair. Not even three scoops of ice cream would satisfy him now. 

“I want him to stop now! I want the feds to stop attacking me! I want my documents to stop being leaked! I want them to ignore Russia now! Putin said this would be easy but it’s not! It’s difficult! It’s not easy peasy lemon squeasy like he said!”

Most of them had fled the room save for Kusher and Pence who spent the next several hours trying to consolidate him.

--

It was the first time in a long while since he heard his father’s voice. Barron Trump was in the middle of building a massive wall in Minecraft in hopes that his father will notice him, and while every previous attempt failed, he was sure it would work this time. He’d bet his fidget spinner on it!

As if a miracle from God, Trump entered his room and called his name. 

“Barron, I need help with the cyber!”

“D-dad?”

“I need you to hack into the FBI and remove everything they have on me and Russia!”

“Okay, dad! I’ll do my best!”

Trump slammed the door shut and Barron got straight to work. The moment went so fast but it felt like forever. Finally, he was communicated to! He was acknowledged! Using every bit of skill he had, he remotely accessed the FBI’s database and scanned through the files, trying to find any that looked relevant to the investigation between Trump and Russia. 

“Let’s see... aliens, JFK, Atlantas, big foot, little foot, 9/11, the moon landing...”

So many files; it was enough to overwhelm a kid. But Barron was an expert with a mission in mind. He wouldn’t let anything stand in his way. 

“Wait, this stuff looks good.”

When he opened the data base labeled ‘Putin and orange retard’, he was treated to a page with thousands of different files connecting Trump, his administration, and the Russians. There were pictures, scans of documents, text files, and even videos.

“Wow, I wonder what dad was doing with them.”

He clicked on video titles ‘pee tapes’ and minutes later from the halls, the staff could hear his screams.

--

Trump was scouting through the different rooms in the White House. Inside one was his wife being triple penetrated by secret service members. “Melina or whatever, have you seen Ivanka?”

“No!”

“Ok.”

He left unaware that he was being cucked. In another room was Sessions pulling on a rope that was attached to the ceiling fan while some voice, distinctly black, was gasping for air just out of view.

“I barely recognized you in your white hood. Have you seen Ivanka?”

“No.”

“Ok.”

A third room had Spicer and Bannon wresting for alcohol. Spicer was ranting about wanting to make the pain go away while Bannon just made several drunken antisemetic slurs. 

“Hey have you seen Ivanka anywhere?”

They both shook their heads before Bannon finally snatched the bottle away, flipped it to its narrow side, and smashed it over Spicer’s head. The man was knocked out and the alcohol was spilled, forcing Bannon to crawl on top of Spicer and lick it off his unconscious body. 

“Boy, Pence would be mad at that!”

Finally, Trump entered a room and found Ivanka. She was dressed in the sluttiest attire she had and laying in her bed, leads spread apart. Trump was already trying to pull his pants down, having difficulty moving his gut so he can unbuckle his belt, but wasn’t even able to do that when he saw Kusher walk up and climb on top of his daughter. 

“Kushner, stop cucking meeeeee!” He whined.

Ivanka didn’t react. Her mind was incapable of processing anything beyond fashion design and money. She sat there with wide open glassy eyes and a mouth slightly agape while Kusher himself turned around and looked Trump in the eyes. 

“Stop it now, Kushner!” 

“No!”

“I said now! Now! Now! Now! Now! Now!”

Kusher walked over and slammed the door shut. Donald pounded on it with his tiny hands but couldn’t break through. He cried and yelled and rolled on the floor, calling for ‘Mad Dog’ Mattis to launch a nuclear strike against the room and kill Kusher but to no success. 

“I’m telling Putin on you!” He screamed again before finally leaving. Once again he crawled back into his bed all alone and could do nothing but watch the news. Fox, the only real news channel, was reporting on how Trump single handedly cured cancer while the fake news channels were talking about how Muller continues to hire the absolute best lawyers and prosecutors the country has to offer. Trump yelled at the TV to stop Muller from continuing, often mistaking Muller for Comey, but it was no use. No matter how much he cried, the TV didn’t show the investigation stopping. 

He knew that morning, he would have such a rant to post on Twitter. It was a bad day. : (

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz 26.10.17 lb

i hope you’re ready for me yelling about feminism and the patriarchy all through today’s lb coz i’m just in one of those moods. 

gauri is shooook. SHOOOK.

i would be too, after THAT confession. like.... what the fuck even was that???? i rewatched it and i had suchhhhhhhh a visceral reaction and cried more even than the first time i watched.

shivaay knows that shit went dowwwwwwwn. 

oh boy, ajay doesn’t look to be in a good mood. 

bro just coz two ppl are coming from the same direction, means absolutely nothing?????? 

i mean not in this case, coz these two were fully eye-fucking, but i’m just saying... generally, life mein. lol. 😋😋😋

when the guy you’re threatening makes THIS 👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽 face at you, maybe you should reconsider. 

especially when he has backup. 👪🏽👪🏽👪🏽

lmfaooooo majaaaal toh dekho in oberois ki; SHAADI MEIN AAKE ISKI DULHAN KO UTHAANE KA INTEZAAM KAR RAHE HAI; AUR JAB BANDA OBJECT KAREIN, TOH USKO DHAMKI DE RAHEIN HAI. srsssssssly. suchhhhh assholes. 

ajay be like THE FUCK IS HAPPENING??????? and rightly so, because OMG WHY THE FUCK IS SHIVAAY THREATENINGLY DOING DALER MEHENDI DANCE STEPS AT HIM??????????? 

WOW. AJAY GOT THREATENED BY THIS AND LEFT ALSO. AMAZING. 😧😧😧😧😧😧

“LEKIN KYUN?????”

behenji, pehle apne devar ke pooore ke poore karnaame toh usse pooch lo; bina kuch jaane hi aa gayi ho shaadi rukwaane. 

of course, as a 4 lions leading man, the basic concept of a woman’s consent hasn’t ever occurred to shivaay. 

“usne bola chale jao, toh tu chala jayega???” UM YES THAT’S HOW NORMAL, DECENT AND CIVIL ADULT PEOPLE BEHAVE. BUT YOU WOULDN’T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THAT. STUPIDASS.

what’s reallyyyyyyy fucking annoying me is that even anika and bhavya look perplexed by this whole concept of om agreeing to gauri’s wishes. ANIKA. WHO WAS FORCED INTO MARRIAGE AGAINST HER WILL. ek kambakht ‘i love you’ kya sun liya saal-bhar ke bakchodi ke baad, uski akal ghaas charrne gayi hai. 

“gauri ki aaankhon meinnnn maine tere liye pyaar dekha. MAINE DEKHA HAI!!!!!!!!”

achcha???? no shitttttt. aur woh bade bade aansoon that she’s been shedding since the day she’s met your godforsaken brother??? WOH NAHI DIKHA TUJHE, CHUTIYE?? #disappoint #brotpKoDhoka #dafaaHoJaaPlz

yeah please, focus on the fucking dabaav she’s under, and not your shitty brother. please, someone think of my girl for once. 

if i hear the word “ishqbaaz” uttered one more time to justify such absolute fuckery, i swear.............

“hum dulhaniya ko lekar hi jayenge.”

“......... whether SHE wants it or not. making us no different from ajay, really. but since we’re better looking and the leads of the show, janta maaf kar degi.” 

ok shivaay kissing om’s hand was cute af. i always love love love when he shows affection unreservedly by kissing his brothers. fuck stupid toxic masculinity where you can’t show your brothers and friends how much you love them. 

deeeeeeeeeep cleansing breath to exhale out all the bitterness i’m feeling today towards shivika, or i’ll never be able to enjoy their couple scenes. 

snort. anika cussing out lappuji and his shoddy work. 

yup, this freakout at signs of aging is real. *bathes in anti aging serum in a desperate attempt to cheat time* 

don’t know if you tumblr bachchas can relate though, coz other than a handful of us here, literally alllll of you are tiny little babies who should still be in your mom’s wombs. 

LMAOOOO THIS IMAGINATION. ANIKA YOU IDIOT GIRL. 

god he looks so good in the black tho. 😍😍😍

billu LITERALLY be like: 

“aisa hota hai. is umar mein log satthiaa jaate hai thode.” 

first of all, shivaay would never use the word “satthiaaa”. it’s such an anika word.

also fuck off billu. you were born satthiyaaaya hua. 😒😒😒😒

wifey mad. and sad. 

“ek baar tumhari taraf dekh liya maine, uske baad main kuch aur nahi dekh paaonga. kuch bhi nahi.” 

nowwwwwww we talking. 😏😏😏😏

also lol, this is kinda making anika sound like the ark of the covenant? like if he looks at her directly, he’ll go blind? 

ok i’m not sure i feel this romance, with her still in the wig, and him looking so unlike him in this outfit, but his sexy voice is A++++++++++ 

OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HER BEFORE YOU TWO GET ACCUSED OF INCEST

lmaoooooo “kitne jaale shaale ho gaye, NOT COOL!” 

baal baal bache. 

LOL. baal baal, geddit? coz both of their baal.... hee hee hee. 😂😂😂😂😂😂

diljeeet do minute ke liye votiiii ke saath busy kya ho gaya, digvijay has swooped riiiiiiight in and taken his place with all the titliyaan. 

that girl in the dark blue outfit is a goddamn babe and all kindsa goals honestly. lord give me her face and hair and outfit! 

#same bhavya. saaaame. 

is he really going to shoot this gun inside the damn house???? fucking idiot. 

lmaoooooooo bhavya’s glee at his incompetence. 

HAAAAAAA, I AM REALLY LOVING BHAVYA MORE AND MORE THESE DAYS. WHAT A CUTIE. 

back to these two and their weirdass oedipal romancing. when i was like i wanna see shivika role playing, this is reaaaaaalllly not what i had in mind. 😕😕😕

OMFG SHIVAAY STOP IT YOU IDIOT 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈

ouff these cuteass idiotssssssss. 

YES PLEASE REMOVE THIS STUPIDASS FUCKING WIG ALREADY

SO MUCH BETTER. YES. NOW PLEASE MAKE OUT. 😚😚😚

.... nope. one more interruption. goddddd, can you fuckers just lock the goddamn dooor!!?!!!!

ohhhhh ho, kya chutiyaapa hai?!?!?!!! 😒😒😒

lmao shivaay you fucking idiot, why are YOU screaming???? 😂😂😂

oufffff, these two aunties are really annoying me. can they die plz? 

meanwhile unnecessary angst here between rudra/bhavya that literally no one cares about. 

are we to get any rikara today or saara episode aise hi bakchodi mein waste hona hai???

“mazaak aap apni khud udvaate hai.” 

preach. tell him, girl. 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

lord, who’da thunk that i’d grow to be a fan of bhavya??? not me! matlab, i’m happy that the writing of her character has improved and she’s really likable now, but hella sad that it’s come at the expense of rudra’s character. 

lmao did he just call her “MEAN”????? rudra, what are you, fucking 12?

ok fuck thissss stupid angst nonsense. you fully deserved that thappad for the BS you pulled at her goddamn fucking wedding, rudra. you have zeeeeeeero grounds here. less than zero. 

why is anika being forced to sleep with these two buddhis??? 

BULBULLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!! OMG AANKHEIN TARAS GAYI THI TUMHARE LIYE. 😭😭😭😭😭

she’s here to rescue bhaujaaaai. bless her hearttttt, honestly. no one in this fucking show deserves the perfection that is gauri kumari sharma. she’s the best human being of them all and should be worshipped. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

hein? shivaay - maaaaaaaaaa scene??? matlab... okay??? 😕😕😕😕

WHAT? EVEN MAAAAAA KNOWS THAT ALL THESE ARE OBEROIS????? 😯😯😯😯

she’s not as clueless as she looks, this maaaaaaa. 

god, even maaaaaaaaaaaaa is focused on gauri’s majboori only in the context/frame of OMG SHE’S LEAVING OMKARA. fuckkkkk omkara, and think about GAURI. 😑😑😑

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH. 

that isn’t the child actress who played anika in the flashback tho, is it??? chalo ok, whatever. key here is that shivaay’s potentially gonna bring aniRi together and oh my god i am already fucking crying at the ideaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

these fuckers are legit having a slumber partyyyyy here. 

poor ajay. he has no idea what’s coming for him and his planned wedding.