#my sleep schedule is a nightmare

[xbomboi]

cooking…

planting the seeds…

[tazmiilly]

i think he looks nice in pink.....

[synthwayve]

Days since thinking about Byrgenwerth era: 0

[queen0fm0nsterz]

TAKE THIS WOMAN AWAY FROM ME

[chiff0n-echz]

Jester passive Nightmare ✷

[watermelinoe]

i think the circadian rhythm disorder has ruined my life more than the pain disorder tbh

[lokislittlesigyn]

I’ve started reading fanfic before bed to try to quiet my brain, which runs 100mph and likes to scare me and overwhelm me at night. Only problem is, I get locked into the story and end up reading way too much. 🥲

[nightfayre]

things have been rough lately… tale as old as time

[toribookworm22]

You may have noticed that I accidentally skipped out on WBW today. I kinda had a wild ride of a day. Not bad, just... a time.

Sooooo, here's my updated post schedule:

Thursday - WBW delayed

Friday - clean out day

Saturday - STS

Sunday - Art Blogs

[whumpacabra]

8. Gas Station Snack Stop

Anticipated violence, captivity, threats, nightmare, firearm mention, shock collar mention, past captivity and torture, past rescue

AU Masterpost / Previous / Next

Harrison watched the Wolf, one hand steadying himself where he sat curled in the front seat and the other holding a pistol heavy with bullets. Elias and Merrick would be right back. 15 minutes tops. He could keep an eye on the unconscious man (prisoner? former-torturer?) sleeping on the backseat of the humvee.

They had been driving for hours, collecting their thoughts and what information they could while the Wolf was barely lucid and useless. They were in the United States. Probably Nevada.

(“Had they even left?” Harrison had asked bitterly, horror and anger bubbling beneath his skin with that revelation. Merrick quelled any contentions - speculation wouldn’t help them. Not yet.)

Elias spent most of the drive worrying over the Wolf. He would deny this if Harrison accused him of it, of course, but the kid couldn’t help it. His training as a medic, as brief as it was, still bled from his eyes and hands as he watched the Wolf’s unsteady breathing, as he braced the Wolf’s limp form falling off the seat as they rumbled down the exit ramp to this middle of nowhere gas station.

Harrison wouldn’t admit he wanted Elias here, worrying over the Wolf so he didn’t have to. The way he flinched in his sleep, eyes rolling wildly behind his eyelids in the throes of a dream - a nightmare -

How many times had Harrison kept watch while Elias and Merrick slept the same way?

When the Wolf made a panicked sound in the back of his throat and jolted upright, only Harrison’s well trained tigger discipline kept the panicked soldier from putting a bullet in his chest. The Wolf seemed to realize this fact, freezing in his scramble to sit up, bloodshot eyes wide and fixed on the vehicle floor.

“Good morning, Wolf.” Harrison said, the second language sliding easily off his tongue. In his rabid desperation last night, he had completely forgotten the Wolf only ever spoke Arabic to them. In his frustrated fear in the heat of the moment, he had been trying to interrogate the half conscious man in English.

But speaking in what Harrison assumed to be his native tongue had no effect. Speaking didn’t seem to have any effect at all - the Wolf didn’t move a muscle, didn’t blink -

Harrison could almost swear he could see the man’s frantic pulse thrumming through his bloodied throat.

“Relax. If we wanted you dead you’d still be on your back in the desert.” Harrison didn’t feel bad refusing the Wolf a single scrap of softness after everything he had done to them, but the way he wilted under the words soured something in Harrison’s throat. “We’re going back to base. The Commander will figure out what to do with you.”

What was this prickle of pity in his chest? Sure, the guy had been collared - had broken them out of that hell but - but he had still tortured them for weeks. He couldn’t just swoop in and play the hero now - he shouldn’t have been shaking, cowering like he was on the verge of tears -

(Didn’t he realize he could just leave?)

Sure, Harrison had a gun on him, but his trigger discipline was sound and grip gentle. It would be a scramble to shoot him if he was ducking away, out the back door. Not to mention Harrison had just admitted they didn’t want to kill him. The Wolf was smart enough to notice the doors were unlocked. Smart enough to realize Harrison was weak and alone and he could just run.

(Harrison wanted him to run. To disappear from their lives before he had to confront the messy reality of…whatever the Wolf was to them.)

But he didn’t, he just sat there, head hung in the space between the driver’s seat and the backseat, shaking like a leaf, eyes trained on the ground, terrified -

The Wolf wasn’t supposed to be scared of anything, least of all someone as helpless as Harrison.

(What the fuck was he so scared of?)

(…)

(Who?)

“Who collared you?” Harrison had a few guesses, or at least, a few possible suspects. The power dynamics he glimpsed among the other guards, the torturers - everything pointed to the Wolf running the show. But the way the American guards treated him at that checkpoint…

He wasn’t in control of the bunker’s operations. But he had to know who was.

“Where are we?”

Harrison recoiled at the voice, hoarse and alien to his ears. The Wolf could speak English. He had a German accent. (That explained why his Arabic was so stilted, Harrison supposed.) It took the solider a moment to process the non-answer - the question to his question.

“South. About 8 hours.” Harrison wasn’t wholly sure why he answered, because there was still venom on his tongue. “Now what the fuck happened back there?”

“Got out.” The Wolf’s voice, the English on his tongue - Harrison hated it. He hated how easy it was to dissociate this timid, soft spoken man from the torturer who had snapped and laughed at their pain for weeks.

“Why?” Harrison asked again, letting his expression open - just a bit. He couldn’t make sense of it; well, he could, just not in a way that let his empty stomach settle.

Someone had collared the Wolf.

(How long had he been at the end of someone else’s leash?)

Dark eyes flickered between the floor and Harrison’s own, fingers working the fabric of his jacket sleeves. The Wolf was about to say something - maybe about to even answer Harrison’s question with more than a word or two - when there was movement at gas station door. Harrison was relieved to see Merrick carrying plastic bags of food and drinks, and a first aid kit tucked under Elias’ arm.

“Maybe Elias can help you with your neck.” Harrison mumbled, looking back to see if the Wolf finally took the hint and ran before he was outnumbered again. He didn’t, because why would he do anything that made sense. The Wolf leaned back in his seat, a sigh heaving from his broad chest and his expression unreadable.

Why wouldn’t the bastard just run?

AU Masterpost / Previous / Next

Taglist: @stargeode @sacredwrath @genuineformality

[underwhelmingalchemist]

Starting pride month with the pharmacy denying me my testosterone prescription until mid-June and my doctor saying she can't do anything about it because it's a controlled substance 🙃✌️

[khaleesiofalicante]

same annie as before, i hope you don't mind me asking, but do you have tips on stress dandruff? something that isn't "reduce stress" because i signed up for the stress and will continue in it for another 2 years 😭

bro my dermatologist said "reduce stress" and i was like "bro be for real 😭😭😭"

Some of the things that actually work and help for me:

prescription shampoo (not head and shoulders or whatever. this is like proper medical shampoo). I got mine prescribed from the dermatologist - but now i buy it over the counter. You can google some stuff and see if it works for you. But i'd recommend going to a derm since the shampoo depends on your scalp type etc. You only have to use it once a week and it doesn't get rid of the dandruff - but rather removes the flakes easily. I usually comb them out thoroughly after I have a shower using the shampoo. I use regular shampoo for rest of the week.

Oil your hair once a week - i do this anyway but this helps - especially if you have dry or itchy scalp and live in a country with warm weather. You can usually oil your hair and massage it nicely into your scalp (very important!) and shower in 2-3 hours. I usually leave it on for the whole day. PS - You can simply use coconut oil. But I use herbal oils that have properties that are good for scalps with dandruff. (like neem or tea tree oil)

home remedies - there are a lot of home remedies that work (including the above). I use neem leaves and the fenugreek method. I only have time to do it once a month or so, but if you can do it at least once a week. They are both actually in controlling dandruff. You can find out how to use them here + some other home remedies as well.

Hope this helps, bebe.

[koschei-the-ginger]

ahhh

[exopelagic]

okay I’m going insane I need to fix my sleep schedule now

[arctic-hands]

My last bout of sleep paralysis (which was when I was recently hospitalized for nine days and getting no sleep because literally almost every half hour someone was waking me up for vitals or a blood drawl or to give me medicine or to prod my stomach or the attending bringing in the interns because I'm a great case study or because my infusion pump wanted to make obnoxious noises for no reason) was so horrific that when I told my therapist about it yesterday she visibly paled and freaked out on my behalf. Is that a good sign?

[robotic-maid]

How things are going again… update I guess? Still can’t figure out how to read more on mobile. I’m just typing this out so it can leave my head.