#my spanish teacher has made me cry multiple times in class

[fragglez]

how will i ever get better grades if homework makes me cry

[icarusredwings]

Finding home Au things that are canon (because I said so, and it's MY au so I can do whatever I want. Send me headcanons, and I'll approve them)

Gambit just got back from the void so he's just now meeting everyone. He looks a little different from how they remember since their gambit really was never a full team mate and rather then just some guy that helped Logan a couple of times. This being said hes meeting Rouge as a 35 year old linguistics teacher for a bunch of brats, flirting with her in the halls, trying to impress her all the time, etc. He wanted to have a cool class like how to use a Bo staff or tutor energy weilding kids but instead got stuck with sex ed. Because of this, he now makes a ton of jokes to Rouge about it (she's across the hall) but actually is really excited to start his cooking elective class this coming fall when he's considered a real team member.

Ororos heals click in the hall like they did when you were a kid and you could tell the principal is coming. She's almost always with a tea or a coffee, walkie talkie and keys jingling. She's very sweet but kids shit their pants if sent to Mrs. Munroes office, meanwhile Mr. Summers office is a nothing, just a lecture and a slap on the wrist. Aint no one actually scared of lasik because they know thw worst theyll get is community work for a couple of weeks but they ligit cry the second theyre sent to munroe's (especially if they know theyre guilty of a big prank or something)

The school gives out free hygiene products and depending on what you need you can special request it.

If students get too angry they are sent to Piotr's art room for art therapy. He surprisingly is very artistic and chill.

Forges shop class is working on a car with no weight limit and that can handle their heavy hitters (Colossus and Wolverine) both in the same car (most bust) as well as a car made from plastic recycling. They're working on it. Its only blown up once!!

Gambit makes breakfast for the staff and some students of they beg enough. He keeps bringing Rouge the first cup of coffee from the pot and has made her pancakes shaped like hearts multiple times. Watching her stab them and smother them make him... giggle helplessly.

Gambit🤝Watching their love intrests viscously stab and rip apart their meals with a boner wishing it was them🤝Wade

He's very respectful towards her, though and sometimes is a bit (COUGH a lot COUGH) of a kiss ass.

Hank's students have blown up the lab at least 4 times by now. One of those times was Wades fault for touching stuff he wasn't supposed to.

Kurt is very glad that Wade has taken over his Duel weaponry/swordsman class, so now he has time to start working out a pitch for a world's religion class+ sunday school. He still runs a fencing club, though.

Peter (quicksilver) has tried so many different positions, including music teacher of all different instruments. Now he just kinda lounges around in the game room and speed cleans the mansion after each day in like 2 minutes flat. Imagine being paid a full salary just for 2 minutes of work? And you get to live somewhere for free and play games all day? Fuck yeah.

Positions I've been thinking about:

Beast (Dr. Henry "Hank" McCoy) is the Vice-Principal, so he does orientation. He has multiple science classes, including biophysics, and has electives in philosophy and poetry.

Colossus (Piotr Rasputin) is an art teacher and handles art therapy

Gambit (Remy LeBeau) runs a sex-ed class and is hoping to soon get approved to run a cooking class next semester.

Nightcrawler (Kurt Wagner) has a fencing elective as well as a religion class, sunday school, and sometimes helps Morph with drama/theater. (Ex duel weaponry instructor)

Rogue (Anna Marie) is a Linguistics teacher who drabbles in social science. “Diction and Linguistics, with Professor Rogue” She can teach just about any language, but russian/german/ french/ spanish and Japanese are her main ones. She's who you go to if you dont understand English and need help. Almost all foreign students have her.

Cyclops (Scott Summers) is the headmaster. He has classes in Geometry, has an elective for leadership and communications (PFFT) as well as being the schools mobility/disability specialist. He, of course, specializes more with children who have trouble with their eyesight.

Storm (Ororo Munroe) is the Headmistress. She has an Environmental Science and Political Science class as well as a multi cultural elective.

Shadowcat (Katherine "Kitty" Pryde) has a comp-sci class and runs an ethics class.

“Ethics 101: Forgetting Everything You Ever Learned From Emma Frost, with Professor Pryde.”

Wolverine (Logan Howlett) is a(n occasional hand to hand combat/ martial arts) PE instructor. (Ex History teacher)

Jubilee is the schools event organizer, event coordinator, event manager, and more broadly, event professional, the ‘hip’ school counselor. "Activities Director & Counselor"

Morph is the director of drama acting and disguises (duh)

Laura is a graduating student In training under the Wolverine (Gabby is a student and is too young to be an understudy)

Yukio graduating student In training Under Storm or Rouge (I can't decide)

Negasonic teenage warhead (Ellie) graduating student In training under Jean Grey.

Mr. Wade Wilson (Deadpool) Is in training under Colossus. Duel weaponry/ swordsman tactics class instructor (plus whatever Logan's doing, he's very nosey and WILL cause issues if bored)

Jean Grey is an english teacher, has a class on psychology, and drabbles in physics.

Ice man (Bobby) is the school financal advisor/accountant and runs a business elective class.

Forge is a Shop teacher.

Quicksilver (Peter maximoff) Janitor, housekeeping, music teacher, replaced original Logan as PE teacher for a while, target practice, teaches fast kids how to avoid running into walls, always in the game room, stock/ errand boy, gets bored super quickly, sports instructor, Read almost all the books in the library, likes swimming, mainly just lays around waiting for something fun to do, his father causes trouble sometimes which he thinks is entertaining but also hella embaressing.

I'm unfortunately left without a history teacher, so shoot me any ideas :)

[daddyzanchez]

Daddyzanchez’ Masterpost

Multi-chapter Fics

Up In The Air (Sugardaddy Rick x Reader) erotica: a multiple chapter fic about your job as a flight attendant that takes a turn, when you meet a tall passenger in an expensive Loro Piana suit. 

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 /

(On AO3 here)

Oh, Mr. Sanchez (Teacher Rick x Reader) erotica: You finally pull yourself together to do something about the flirting that had been going on between you and Mr. Sanchez - and an affair starts. 

Part 1 / Part 2

(On AO3 here)

Kindness and Wrath Series

Handsome; M/M, tying a tie, kissing, sweet touching, suits, fluffy ending - 850 words - Wrath accidentally, nearly, strangling himself when getting angry over trying to tie a tie. Kindness helps (On AO3 here)

Eyes; M/M, JUST FLUFF AND HUGS - 850 words - Kindness sees for the first time (On AO3 here).  

Visual; M/M, feels, masturbation, voyeur, anal fingering, ❤️ love making ❤️, blood play (kinda), biting, hickies, loads of kissing - 3900 words - Kindness doesn't want to go to sleep. (On AO3 here)

Erotica

C-137 Rick - Honey, I’m Home; M/F rough oral sex, rough sex, slight name calling and slight bondage - 1600 words - You knew the sound of a portal opening in your sleep, could recognise it in a crowd and it made you giddy. Rick being home after a long adventure with Morty meant that he was short on a dose of you, making him a little rougher than usual, and you loved it. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - The Tables Have Turned; M/F, pegging, rough sex, dirty talk, name calling, tickling, restraints, slight nipple play - 2400 words - It was still slightly surrealistic to know that Rick had willingly done this, let you be in control of him and be the teased one for a change; it was always you, you underneath his touch that sent you to the point of pathetic begging. (On AO3 here)

Flesh Curtains Rick - The Girl Is Mine; M/F, mildly dubious consent (because you have a boyfriend), pussy eating, possessiveness, cheating, roughness - 2400 words - When Flesh Curtains were touring, the opening act was a big part of the whole show altogether. They had to be somewhat talented, likable and most importantly - there should be at least one of the members who Rick could shag senseless backstage when fans weren’t interesting. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - Slow Sex Or Mushy Pancakes; M/F, Morning sex, aching sex, mushy pancakes, rough sex, quickie, slight grinding - 1400 words - In which Reader makes pancakes for breakfast and Rick gets pissy about having to choose between sex or mushy pancakes. He chooses the next best: A quickie and non-mushy pancakes. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - A Slip Of The Tongue; M/F, face-sitting, eating out, daddy kink - 1000 words - It took a moment before you realised what you had just said but when you did, your heart dropped and it felt like a train was hitting you at maximum speed. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - Did You Read It In Cosmopolitan?; M/F, erotic massage, slow sex, love making, feelings, love confessions, blow jobs, just fluffy smut and just so many feelings and being gentle - 3500 words - Rick is away on adventures a lot, making your sex-life consist of a little too many quickies. You want slow for once - you'll never believe what happens next! (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - More Than Just A Dance; M/F, dry humping, lap dance, established relationship, house cleaning, coming in pants - 2300 words - Your apartment is in for a Spring cleaning, so when you are mopping the floor whilst shaking your ass to a groovy beat, Rick sees you and orders a dance for himself. (On AO3 here)

Flesh Curtains Rick - Cherry Cheeks; F/M, spanking, bondage, gag-ball, dirty talk, dominant Rick being called master - 2100 words - Don’t be a smart mouth around Rick Sanchez (On AO3 here)

Cop Rick - Below His Mouth; F/M, cunnilingus/eating out, sexting, dirty talk, daddy kink, true love - 1500 words - You and Cop have been two weeks apart and the last texts you have received have been about how much he wanted to eat you out. (On AO3 here)

Flesh Curtains Rick - You Really Got Me Going; F/M, dirty talk, wall sex, clit stimulation, star-fucking - 2200 words - Rick, member of The Flesh Curtains, spots you singing his song at a small karaoke bar. He makes his bodyguard take you to the back. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - I’ll Smack The Brat Out Of You; Genderneutral, spanking, light bondage, dirty talk, daddy kink - 2300 words - It’s been forever since Daddy was out to play. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - Pizza and Persuasion; F/M, cuddles, sleepy cuddles, sex, pizza, lazy days - 1300 words - Should you call in sick for work? Rick persuades you. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - Desperate But So Far Away; F/M, mutual masturbation, dirty talk, phone sex - 2000 words - Rick is not home but today, without him, you simply cannot get off so you decide to get him to call you. (On AO3 here) 

C-137 Rick - Achingly Good; F/M, Daddy (Papi) kink, rough sex, a bit of choking, fingering, dom/sub vibes - 1600 words - You call Rick Papi when you want anything but vanilla sex. It drives him wild. (On AO3 here)

Two young Ricks - Double The Fun; F/M/M, threesome, double penetration, anal sex, vaginal sex, blowjob, spanking, daddy kink, possessive behaviour, sex club, creampie, fingering, anal fingering, verbal humiliation, praising - 5400 words - You meet Rick and Rickard at a sex club and things take off from there. (On AO3 here)

Riq IV - Showing You Off; written in genderneutral language and no gender-specific pet names, rough vaginal sex, rough oral sex, forced deep-throating, choking, spanking, slightly bad BDSM etiquette, exhibitionism, voyeur, office/desk sex, sir/pet, collars and leashes, finger sucking - 3900 words - Riq IV invites you for some fun in his office but what you don’t know is that he is in the middle of a video business call when you show up in a leash and skimpy underwear (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - New Beginnings And Old Bad Habits; F/M, break-up + post break-up, hurt, IKEA, emotional sex, wall sex, semi-public sex, angst, arguing, tearstearstears - 3550 words - You meet your ex, Rick Sanchez, in IKEA, furniture-shopping, after the two of you split the furniture 50/50 (On AO3 here)

Miami Rick - Gates Of Heaven; F/M, pussy eating, fingering, finger fucking, wet and messy, praise kink, Miami speaks a little Spanish! - 800 words - Miami loves going down on you (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - All These Deadlines; F/M, procrastinating, banter, college student, vaginal sex, stress relief sex - 2000 words - You are procrastinating due to a Biology assignment, Rick helps. (On AO3 here)

D-99 Rick - A Long And Hard... Day; F/M, vaginal sex, blow jobs, come swallowing - 2050 words - In which you take care of D-99 after he has had a long day at work. (On AO3 here) 

C-137 Rick - In Your Dreams; F/M, dream sex, brief non-consensual kissing, kissing, make-out session, fingering, multiple orgasms - 2500 words - Rick visits you in dreamland for some fun time. (On AO3 here) 

C-137 Rick - Interrupted Plans; F/M, fingering, hand jobs, riding, quickie, passionate - 1950 words - Rick portals home briefly (Despite having plans) to take care of you. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - Poking The Bear; M/M, spanking, orgasm denial, sobbing, dirty talk - 2450 words - How To Get A Spanking: You do everything you can to piss off Rick. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - Originality - A New Year’s Eve Story; F/M, clit stimulation, orgasm denial, new year’s countdown - 1450 words - Rick says he wants to make you come as you enter 2019. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - No Chocolates, No Flowers; F/M, Valentine’s Day, cunnilingus, daddy kink, vaginal sex, riding, squirting, passion, sorta rough and sorta sweet, morning sex, vaginal fingering, brief finger sucking - 3000 words - Rick, surprisingly, gives you a Valentine’s present. (On AO3 here)

Zero Rick - Worst Week Ever!!!; F/M, hurt/comfort, comfort sex, vaginal sex, kissing, undressing, fluff - 2580 words - You go to bed in frustration after having had the worst week ever at your job, and Zero is ready to comfort you the best he can. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - A Very Rickdiculous Christmas Present; F/M, Christmas, lingerie, dirty talk, vaginal sex, fingering, creampie - 2000 words - You decide to put Rick in Christmas mood by buying a set of lingerie. (On AO3 here)  

SFW work

C-137 Rick - Don’t Ruin My Sheets; genderneutral, bathing/washing, caring for/care-taking, fluff, romantic fluff - 2000 words - Rick comes homes from an adventure, smelling like God knows what - he wants to sleep, in your bed, in your nice sheets with that stench coming from him - hell no, you decide to give him a bath. (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - A Cure For Moodiness; genderneutral, non-consensual tickling, tickling, fluff, love confessions - 1600 words - Rick is having a bad day - and given how childish he is when angry, you figure you would have to use childish methods to make it all better. (On AO3 here)

Doofus Rick - Until I Found You; F/M (but can be gender neutral if you simply switch the word girlfriend with boyfriend), cuddling, dating, romance, love, star gazing, fluff - 1500 words - Rick has a romantic surprise for you but what is the occasion? (On AO3 here).

C-137 Rick - Not Interested; F/M, bar fight, men not understanding a ‘not interested’, surprise kissing, protectiveness, Rick being nice and not actually looking for pussy???, sexist/derogatory language about women - 2500 words - Rick comes to your aid when a creepy guy cannot understand that not interested means not interested. (On AO3 here) 

C-137 Rick - Enough!; F/M (but can be M/M, if you want), scoldings, flirting, oh no we have a date all of a sudden - 1700 words - Rick Sanchez keeps trying to drag Morty out of your class but one day, you put your foot down. (On AO3 here) 

C-137 Rick - Perfect Imperfections; genderneutral, depression, emotional hurt/comfort, self-hatred, alcohol, comforting embraces, crying/sobbing - 1400 words - Rick tries to comfort you in his own way when your depression is at its high (On AO3 here) 

C-137 Rick - You’re A Softie, Rick Sanchez; F/M, Rick’s POV, couch cuddles, kissing, true love, fluff - approximately 800 words - Rick is lost in thought when looking at you (On AO3 here)

C-137 Rick - I Can’t Protect You; F/M, danger, spaceship crash, description of blood, true love, Rick is hurt and vulnerable - 1150 words - Rick and you crash on unknown territory, which causes Rick to have second thoughts about the two of you. (On AO3 here) 

Flesh Curtains Rick - Silent Dressing Rooms; F/M, The Flesh Curtains, Diane Sanchez, teen romance, heartbreak, angst and feels - 1800 words -  In this story, Diane and Rick did not end up together. They were simply teen lovers, now meeting backstage after 30ish years after a concert by The Flesh Curtains. (On AO3 here)

[haleyvonfeldt-blog]

Wait.. she did do a Christian Program?

Sunday,  November 26th

Hey y’all, if you have been with me since the beginning of this journey you may remember me saying I was in a Christian Study Abroad Program. l haven’t talked about it a lot, but I think the following reflection will explain why. I had to write an��“impact assessment” bout my missionary time here, so I thought I would post it as well. Enjoy! 

Impact Assessment

During my time in Veritas I got to take part in 3 different missionary experiences. Those experiences were, visiting the ‘hogar’ or half-way home, working with Años Dorados the elderly ministry, and translating for missionaries from Texas. Now, when signing up to take part in Veritas I had very different expectations, and I think that is fair considering 2 main components of Veritas were disbanded after I had already signed up. Originally Veritas was composed of 3 parts 1) a class for those students in the class about missionaries and mission work 2) a mission trip for a week at the end of the program and 3) assorted volunteer experiences in the Valparaíso community. Unfortunately, components 1 and 2 were no longer offered after only 2 of us had signed up for the Veritas program this semester. Because of this reason alone, I think I started off with a fairly negative mindset of Veritas because I was disappointed that I paid more money to be part of a special program, and then the two things that the money was supposed to go to, didn’t end up happening. So overall, before I go into saying how the third part of Veritas impacted me, I was overall ‘a little salty’ with my Veritas experience, and wouldn’t recommend it to those studying abroad.

Now, all that set aside, and the practicableness of the Veritas program forgotten, I did enjoy my time that I got to work as a missionary in the community. All three of my volunteer experiences were so different, helped me grow in different ways, and affected my relationship with God and outlook on mission. I want to spend time on how each different things impacted my life.

First, the ‘orphanage.’ This home was not an orphanage, it was more like a foster home. The kids in this home (10-15 children usually lived there, ages 4-16) were taken from their homes because of abusive or horrible home conditions. Their parents or care takers are in some sort of rehab program, and there is hope that they will get to return to their families. Over the course of our semester we witnessed 4 or so kids getting to go back to their families. We, Jess and I, went to the home every Friday (as long as we weren’t traveling) for a few hours in the afternoon. When we arrive, no matter if it the first week or the last, the kids would be slow to warm up to us, which is not what I imagined. I assumed I would be some kind “savior” for them. I imagined walking in each week and all their problems would go away, and they would run up to me and climb all over me and cry when it was time to go. That was not AT ALL the case. Sometimes it would take about 10 minutes just to get a kid to play rock, paper, scissors, with me. Once they did warm up we would play tag or hide and seek in the back yard, I would give horseback rides or kick around a soccer ball, a couple times we brought things to make bracelets or paint nails. And that was it. Then I would leave. Sometimes I would get kisses goodbye, others I would be ignored as I walked away. I would walk back to the bus stop frustrated because I felt like I hadn’t solved all their problems. Upon lots of reflection, I realized that was the point. I wasn’t there to solve their problems, only Christ does that, I was just there to love them, be there for them, and that just frustrated me more. That’s a humbling lesson to learn, that you can’t solve all the problems, or fix the lives of these kids that have nothing, you can simply just help them have a little joy. It made me think about teaching. In 6 or 7 months, I will hopefully have my own classroom, my first class, and once again I will want to be Wonder Woman for my kiddos. But that isn’t the reality. Yes, I can help, yes, I can teach, but I can’t solve all the problems. I might teach multiplication a thousand different ways, and little Johnny still might never understand it, and that is frustrating. But my job is not to just reap the crops, it is to sow them. Because who knows, maybe down the road it will click for little Johnny and some other teacher will get to see him learn.

It was same way for Moses after he delivered his people from Egypt. After wandering around for many years with the whole crowd he asked “God, WHEN AM I GOING TO GET TO THE PROMSED LAND?!!?!?” (I am paraphrasing here) And God said, “You’re not, you are going to die and Joshua is actually going to lead them to the promised land.” So, Moses spent all this time, and didn’t ever make it to the promise land. And that’s okay. It took great humility to accept that, and that is what I have taken away the most from the ‘hogar.’ I can’t solve the world’s problems, I can shed a little light, bring joy, and trust in the Lord to guide me and those whom I have been called to serve.

The next part of Veritas to reflect on is working with Años Dorados, and elderly ministry at a church. We would help prepare Once (tea, sandwiches, and cookies) and then participate in the event, and then serve Once. I loved this ministry, it was probably my favorite. This simply taught me that God works in crazy ways, and joy is lifelong. These lovely people who attended this every other week were so full of joy. I want to be able to sing and praise and clap along to worship songs when I am that old. I never thought I would be as grateful as I am for the time that I had with this ministry, you are never too old for joy.

The third ministry I took part in was translating for a pair of Baptist missionaries from Texas. Although I disagreed with a lot of their theology and way of going about mission, this was still a great learning experience, and I grew so much in confidence of my Spanish abilities. I also witnessed so much radical hospitality, which has been a them in my life the past year. We are all sons and daughters of God, and although I believe they have strayed a little bit in their ideals, it was still beautiful to see people bringing the Gospel to life. I also got to see the poorest parts of Valparaíso, the city I live in. I wouldn’t have ever seen these areas without these mission opportunities.

I have loved my opportunities for mission here in Chile. Although my mindset about them wasn’t the greatest, I still grew from my time in the Veritas program. I learned that I can’t solve the world’s problems, I can just bring joy. I learned that you can have joy your whole life and you are never too old to praise the Lord. I learned that I am better at Spanish than I thought and radical hospitality is world-wide.

As for personal, outside of mission work growth, my prayer has centered around two main things. 1) The Mass is one of the few constants in the world, and is the greatest sense of comfort and home. 2) This has been a great time of rest and renewal. I have been nonstop on mission, like all missionaries should be after they understand the great commission, but this has been a time of rest and growth, and it has been amazing. I am excited and feel so ready to go back and lead Bible Studies and small groups and talk mission strategy again. It has been nice to focus on my own growth in my relationship with Christ. I am so thankful for this opportunity to be here in Chile and work on my relationship with Christ.  

[soshortstoryteller]

Auto-tag supposed to be an ask away but nah

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

Yes! I’m aware of how lucky I am even if my dad is sometimes insufferable. Nothing compared to some of my friends’

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?

My mom ^^

03: Do you regret anything?

I used to regret not taking up music when I was 7 and offered to, but now that I’ve finally started guitar this “to-do-thing” is checked and the regret faded away!

04: Are you insecure?

It depends, but normally i’m not except for when my latent anxiety wakes up :’D

05: What is your relationship status?

Lots of husbandos and waifus and in love with myself

06: How do you want to die?

Peacefully and old

07: What did you last eat?

A SOUP THAT HAD EGG, HAM AND CHEESE IS MY MOM A MASTERCHEF OKEY? OKEY.

  08: Played any sports?

Currently starting w/ skate and formerly karate and dancing

09: Do you bite your nails?

Sore finger instead :DD

10: When was your last physical fight?

When I was 12 in the middle of the high school’s corridor (the guy was bullying me okey? okey.) 

11: Do you like someone?

I like lots of people, starting with myself and finishing with you ewe

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

Nah I always want to sleep

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?

All of the rapists in the world 

14: Do you miss someone?

MY FRIENDS BECAUSE I CAN’T SEE THEM SO OFTEN NOW 

15: Have any pets?

Oh Alá 

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?

Lazy. Does that count?

17: Ever made out in the bathroom?

Of course, with myself if you know what i mean okno

18: Are you scared of spiders?

Only if they’re poisonous and their venom can kill me. Otherwise, THEY ARE CUTE, RON WEASLY!

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

YES I WOULD GO TO PREHISTORY AND TO VISIT SO MANY MYSOGINISTS, RACISTS ETC TO SLAP THEM AND WHILE I’M AT IT I OBSERVE THE TIME I AM IN ^U^

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?

You’re getting annoying man. Somewhere in the SIMS.

21: What are your plans for this weekend?

Papers yay :DDD

22: Do you want to have kids? How many?

Yep! 1. At most 2 (and if so they must be identical twins or else an adopted teenager)

23: Do you have piercings? How many?

Nope. 0.

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

Anything related to Humanities really (though Philosophy is the most difficult to me but i love it anyway)

25: Do you miss anyone from your past?

Nah, it’s more like nostalgia but not missing

26: What are you craving right now?

Worldwide peace, eradication of famine, capitalism and heteropatriarchy and, of course, Miraculous Ladybug E7 S2

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

I’m not sure

28: Have you ever been cheated on?

Yes. Magnus promised me I was the only one and then he goes and marries Cleo. what a dickhead.

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

I. Have. Been. Single. My. Whole. Fucking. Life. You. Tirseome. Topic.

30: What’s irritating you right now?

Your stupid questions about love

31: Does somebody love you?

I think I can affirm so

32: What is your favourite color?

Specially turquoise but there’s no color I dislike

  33: Do you have trust issues?

Maybe I trust to quickly

34: Who/what was your last dream about?

Something related to a performance and Merlí (TV show)

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?

It’s been a while since I last cried... Maybe my mom?

36: Do you give out second chances too easily?

No, I give them if I think the person deserves it

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget?

To me, forgive. I can forgive, but it takes time to forget

38: Is this year the best year of your life?

ACTUALLY YES.

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?

*facepalm*

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

Nope but sometimes I think it’d be cool to give it a try

51: Favourite food?

Boof, I’d say meat + bechamel + coliflower but there are so many foods I like (Mexican, Japanese, Spanish, Italian, Arabic...)

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

Yep

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

Putting my bite plate on

54: Is cheating ever okay?

wtf give me a situation

55: Are you mean?

If I have to

56: How many people have you fist fought?

1

57: Do you believe in true love?

Yeah

58: Favourite weather?

CLOUDS. THUNDERS. COLD. IF THERE’S SUN IT HAS TO BE A WARM DAY OR IN THE AFTERNOON, IF NOT I KILL THE SUN

59: Do you like the snow?

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES

60: Do you wanna get married?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

62: What makes you happy?

LOTS OF THINGS. HINT: NOT YOUR QUESTIONS ABOUT LOVE

63: Would you change your name?

No but yes. I like my name but I’d like to be called Dánae

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

Taking into account it was my mom and I hung on her just to kiss her for like 5′ let’s say no

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

Sex doesn’t exist, but if a friends falls for me I’d try to continue being her friend and not to mkae them feel bad

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

Duh

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

*screams like Thomas Sanders* My dad. Happy now??

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

Does my anthropology teacher in class count? His classes are so fucking deep and I love them

69: Do you believe in soulmates?

Yeah but I also believe in multiple soulmates 

70: Is there anyone you would die for?

I’m not sure

[themagicaltunaa]

Answer them all Tuna! #100: How's my fave tuna doing?

1. do you have a favourite sweater? 

nope, but i do have a favorite jacket, which is my only jacket tbh

2. what’s your middle name?

its bad

3. do you still talk to the first person you kissed?

never kissed anyone so uh no

4. do you get on with your grandpa`?

no because i dont get to see him at all. he lives on the other side of the country

5. what was your favourite cartoon as a kid?

i have way to many to list.

6. what’s your favourite cartoon now?

none atm

7. do you read the news paper?

do people still read the newspaper?????

8. who was the last text you sent to?

the last text i sent was to my friend Dani

9. what does the last text you sent say?

Did your trip to the store go well?

10. if you could have any hair colour what would it be?

ill just keep my natural hair color

11. do you like nature documentaries?

depends on whats it about tbh

12. what is your aesthetic?

i dont think i have one

13. when did you last pet a dog?

like a month ago. its been too long

14. whose friend’s parents do you like the most?

uh none i guess??

15. have you ever been on a road trip?

no but i would love to go on one some day

16. tell me about someone you know called emma

i dont know anyone named emma

17. are you reading a book in english class, what is it?

i finished my english classes, and im not reading anything atm

18. do you have a favourite aunt?

i love both tia anita and tia ivette

19. baths or showers?

showers

20. skiing or sun bathing?

neither i guess? ive never been skiing and living here in florida has made me hate the sun so no sunbathing

21. do you kill spiders?

yes whenever i have the chance

22. have you ever made an ice pop?

no??? thats a popsicle right?

23. are you wearing shoes right now?

nope

24.tell me about you favourite primary school/elementary school teacher

oh man, my 1st grade teacher Mrs. Brock was the best teacher ever. she was super nice and made learning really fun.she also used to call me rapunzel because of how long my hair was back then. she still called me that even after i went to middle school.

25.who was the last person you hugged?

my little brother at church today

26. do you wear glasses?

yup

27. do you have a cat?

yup i got two of them

28. do you have a favourite pair of underwear?

?

29. what was your last tweet?

i uh, i dont have a twitter

30. do you still use facebook?

never used it to begin with

31. do you like birds?

i guess??

32. who was the last person you called cute?

my cat, oreo

33. who was the last person that called you cute?

lmao no idea

34. how did you meet your best friend?

i have multiple best friends. i met them in 1st grade and in 6th grade

35. escalators or elevators?

escalators

36. are you named after anyone, who?

nope

37. what was your first url?

oh man uh, i think it was airtuna or some shit like that??? i couldnt think of anything so i put that. or maybe it was tunaoverlord? idk its one of those

38. autumn or winter?

autumn!!!!

39. do you win at scrabble?

ive only played scrabble once, and i dont remember if i won

40. put your ipod on shuffle , who is the first song that comes up by?

Holiest (feat. Tei Shi) by Glass Animals

41. have you ever drunk from a mason jar?

yup

42. can you draw?

i was able to when i was like 8. now i cant draw for shit

43. what was your first profile picture?

dont remember

44. favourite tshirt?

either my star wars or my nasa shirt. i fuckin love space

45. best tumblr friend?

@moonspiralheartrod sup you fuck

46. when did you last run?

HA

47. do you like to paint your nails?

nope

48. did you ever do something as a kid that got you into loads of trouble?

dude i got in trouble for everything. if i even breathed wrong i was in trouble. thats what happens when you got a strict mom. 

49. who is your favourite dog that isn’t yours?

my neighbor’s dog, Luca! he’s such a sweetie i love him so much i dont care if he drools everywhere he is perfect

50. have you ever been drunk?

nope.

51. have you ever done something you regret while drunk?

look at the previous answer

52. do you want to kiss anyone right now?

lol nope

53. do/did you like you math teacher?

dont have one atm

54. do you often ride the bus?

yeah :\

55. do you have a fireplace in your house?

nope. you dont need fireplaces when you live in florida

56. are you violent when you’re angry?

no

57. do you cry when you’re angry?

sometimes yeah. its the worst thing, no one can take you seriously

58. favourite Harry potter book?

i uh…….ive never read harry potter…

59. can you remember your last dream?

nope

60. do you go to bed early or late?

the earliest that i go to sleep is like 3am, so yeah i go to sleep late

61. do you speak a second language?

i can somewhat speak spanish

62. who was your first ever best friend?

uhhhh i dont remember

63. have you ever had an operation?

nope

64. tell me about your favourite cousin

i dont know my cousins well enough to have a favorite. 

65. do you have a piece of clothing that doesn’t even fit you anymore but you can’t bare to throw away?

no

66. have you ever been in a musical?

nope

67. do you have a porch?

also no

68. how many times have you watched your favourite movie?

ive seen How to Train Your Dragon so many times that ive lost count

69. what do you order at mcdonalds?

big mac and a when i have extra either an iced coffee or a mcflurry

70. do you get on with old people?

nope

71. science fiction or romance?

science fiction

72. do you take naps?

i try tbh. whenever i do though i always have someone yelling at me :(

73. how many classes do you/did you take in high-school?

7?

74. when did it last snow where you live?

never

75. does it ever snow where you live?

im pretty sure its never snowed here in south florida

76. how many months until your birthday?

about 10 months

77. how much charge does your computer have right now?

100% i always keep it plugged in

78. what is your favourite disney channel movie?

high school musical. its good ok dont judge me

79. the city or the sea side?

sea side

80. what is your least favourite colour?

yellow

81. do you have homework to do?

nope

82. are you still friends with your first best friend?

again, i dont remember who my first best friend is

83. do you have/are you the gay cousin?

again, i dont know my cousins well enough, and im pretty sure im not the gay cousin

84.do you own dungarees?

tf is a dungaree

85. do you like to play sport?

bruh i dont like leaving my room what makes you think i like sports

86. what was your favourite ever christmas present?

money

87. how old are you?

20 :(

88. what is your mum’s name?

Jeanette

89. do you ever use internet explorer?

wtf people still use internet explorer??

90. have you ever had blonde hair?

nope

91. is their a play park near your house?

yup, its like right in front of my house

92. when did you last see the person you have a crush on?

never had a crush on anyone so 

93. who did you last talk to on the phone?

my mom

94. pants or dresses?

pants

95. do you read fan fiction?

yup

96. what is you’re favourite blog?

i dont really have a favorite blog

97. do you write poetry?

nope

98. drama or comedy?

uh comedy i guess

99. have you ever had a hickey?

nope

100. Your own question that you want me to answer

Q: How’s my fave tuna doing? 

hi alyssa! i havent been doing much lately but im doing good. 

[clowncrumbs]

Wtf fun facts about my family

Here is a list of all the weird and crazy things I have learned or experienced with my family

My grandfather has felony charges against him because he was once an illegal guns dealer

My dad and his step sisters once set an entire park on fire (on accident)

My grandmother used to be the leader of a biker gang

Same said grandmother also owned two bars at the time and ran both of them well

She also would bring home any and all stray animals she saw which included dogs, cats, pot bellied pigs, a few reptiles, ferrets, and others I have not been told on yet

This grandmother is also the sweetest person you will ever meet, she’s super nice

My dad would ALSO bring home random stray animals, mostly cats

My dad used to live in a small town, and would know whenever someone moved in, so he would meet the new people and go to their kid if they had one and would tell them “hey I bet you 5$ I can touch the electric fence and be fine” and they’d say bullshit so he would go to the fence and he’d tell them “hold onto my hand so you can pull me off” and they would, so he grabbed the fence and since the body is made mostly of water, the shock traveled right through my dad and into the other poor kid, shocking the fuck out of them

My mother told me that I was not her child and I was a gremlin baby that the found under a bridge and only took me home because they were bribed with gold

Apparently my uncle butch (not actual uncle, family friend) once bought an entire cheese wheel then the moment he got out of the store he just starting biting into it. Just the plain cheese wheel. Nothing else.

Another one of my uncles, uncle bubba, once took a mixing bowl and half a gallon of milk with a box of cereal and almost ate the entire thing but spilled the milk everywhere at the end. I had to help clean it up.

My grandpa once blew his finger off with one of those firecrackers that are illegal now and drove himself to the hospital eighth afterwards

The same grandpa also set himself on fire

He would also get picked up periodically in a helicopter (like the super fancy ones that you could only have if you were the CEO of a big company) and be taken to some type of meeting

My mom has a friend who is in the Guinness world record book for her skills with whips

The same friend also was too lazy to get out of bed once when she injured her leg so she taught herself how to turn the light off with a whip

My dad was once in a bar fight (he won) and once he got up he noticed his foot was backwards so he said “huh” and tried to turn it back the right way, and after he did, it hung limply, with no feeling in it and had to get metal plates in his foot/ankle

He also has multiple metal plates and bolts in his legs and arms

My mom (she’s like 4’9) once got hit by a car (not badly) and was so pissed off that they hit her that she punched the hood of their car and dented it super badly before walking away

When I was in third grade I once tackled a fifth grader (easily twice my size) and managed to pin him to the ground because I thought he was attacking one of my friends, turns out it was her brother. He was visibly scared of me after that

In elementary school I would also regularly get into fights with my brother and they got so bad that teachers would watch us and make sure we didn’t slam each other’s heads into the brick walls (happened more than enough times for them to know they need to watch us)

My fourth grade class once made our Spanish teacher cry, like fucking sobbing in the middle of her room because our class was that bad

The amount of times teachers cannot get my name right is surprising my NAME ISNT EVEN FUCKING HARD TO SPELL

I would get my books taken away in class constantly because I wouldn’t pay attention so I started carrying like five books in my locker and every time they would take my book I would ask to go to my locker, grab one, then come back and start reading again. Some learned that they couldn’t stop me, some never learned

Once in gym (like second or third grade) our teacher for some reason was talking about hitler and how he only liked women with blonde hair and blue eyes and every single other kid in that class looked at me right when she said that

I once screamed “screw you” at a group of fifth graders because they wouldn’t fucking leave me and my friends alone and kept trying to take their stuff and I was Not Having It and I had to be dragged away by a teacher and my brother

In fifth grade (different school) I threatened a third grader because he wouldn’t leave my little sis alone

My middle school sucked so badly that the art teacher we had quit because she couldn’t take it anymore

E V E R Y O N E, and I mean EVERYONE in our middle school fucking hated the tech teacher, her name was Ms. Rooker and she had no clue what she was doing

I regularly got banned from bringing books to school (just my dad) and the moment my teacher thought “Hm, her dad won’t take this seriously, maybe I should call her mother instead.” and my god that was a bad decison. She had a little mini meeting with my ma and the moment she suggested taking away my books altogether my ma fucking LOST IT yelling, wild gestures, everything, she was Pissed.

When I was like three I fucking busted my skull open, like blood everywhere and had to get staples and everything, and all because we were in a new house and I got bored so I decided to “fight” the chimney and jumped off the back of a chair onto the brick chimney

My older sister married a guy she met online and I still have never met this dude, and apparently he’s rich

My older brother’s girlfriend is super close with every single one of the teachers in my high school so they’re regularly at her house drunk as shit so she asks them about me if I have that teacher

And that’s all I can remember for now