#neon tedtalks

[neonmetro]

THE NEW W CORP OUTIS STORY. what if i killed myself

10 YEARS AT WAR. 10 YEARS AT SEA. NEVER RETURNING HOME UNTIL YOU'VE LOST EVERYTHING

[proudace]

I have no idea who Miku is

But I see her fishing in Florida on the dash, and I see her in France, and I just saw 40 something year old Texan real estate Hatsune Miku, and all I can think is “you go blue haired girl, be from everywhere”

[impale-me-radio-daddy]

Look me in the eyes. Look at them. Now come closer. Closer. Right there.

Never. And I repeat, N E V E R. Tone down the amount of antlers in your fanfics. It's my favorite thing. I found myself looking at the tag antlerplay desperately searching for more. I love them.

Okay thank you for coming to my tedtalk

Thanks anon, have some antlers as a treat.

Sleep is the brother of death, and in death there is still sleep. In your sleep there are dreams, the muddled melange of images and memories, disturbed like the surface of the bayou waters under heavy rain. In your dreams you see the streets of your city at night, lit by dirty neon and sallow sodium, revelers spilling from clubs and bars onto sidewalks and into the thick summer air. Smoke spills heavy over asphalt stained yellow in the night and the whole scene thrums to a swing beat, the people and the smoke, even the light. Even you.

The beat is in you, through you. You can feel it through the heels of your shoes, through your shins and your femurs to your hips, a beat at your core that leaves you dizzy and swaying. You are aroused, an ache that clutches at your guts and leaves your throat parched. There’s nothing to drink, no touch on your body save for the beat that seems to enslave you, even your pulse matching the slow, captivating swing of it. Fuck. It feels good, and you can’t help but move, save your body feels heavy, heavy with the smoke. You’re lying on your back, a body on top of you, its weight the weight of the air around you. You reach up, eyes closed, feeling legs straddling your waist, the narrow hips of the man on top of you.

His lips are on your antlers, suckling, teasing. His hands are on your antlers, his touch coaxing and sensual.

“Alastor.” Fuzzily, you recall the name of the man who shares your bed, opening your eyes and squinting up at him. It’s not uncommon for you to wake up to his embrace, or even the slow, sensual grind of his morning tumescence against your ass, but not this. This feels like your body is on fire, your antlers branching to a creaking, aching width under Alastor’s touch. You swallow down your arousal for half a second. “What’s going on?”

Alastor licks a burning line up a tine of your left antler before his mouth is free, but his hands remain in your branches. He smiles down at you. “You don’t know~” he hums, fingers reaching the base of your right antler, and stroking the point at which the bone emerges from your hair. You can feel his touch all through your skull and through your spine, the same swing beat you felt in your dream. “Oh, darling,” he purrs, his eyes half closing, his face drawing close to yours. His antlers have branched, too, but nowhere near as wide as yours.

“Please tell me,” you say, biting back a moan as Alastor’s fingers stroke a perfect resonance over your tines. It makes you shiver, an aching heat between your legs, and you know you’ll have to launder your pajama pants after this, your sex producing embarrassing amounts of slick. Alastor’s smile is cruel as his fingers squeeze, a pressure that seems to run through your body like electricity, and you whimper, out loud this time, your hips bucking against his weight.

“Dear me,” Alastor murmurs, smile widening, and he dips his face to your neck, breathing in deeply. “You’re in quite a state, aren’t you? The smell of you,” he says, and you feel him shiver as he breathes in again.

Alastor runs his fingers up the length of your antlers, and you make an embarrassing, mewling sound in response. He’s right; you are in a state, so aroused it almost hurts, and even Alastor’s gentle ministrations on your antlers are coming close to edging you, his slow strokes thrumming through your bones. “What state?” you push, as Alastor kisses his way from your neck to your jaw.

Alastor draws back with a smile, enjoying the power he has over you for a moment longer before he takes pity. “Why, you’re in heat, darling,” he tells you, and your heart drops to your stomach.

[terribly-late-for-tea]

If you'll permit me to ramble a mo, I live in Southern Ontario, and when people visit here from other provinces/territories/countries, the #1 thing they come in wanting to see, in my experience, is Niagara Falls.

Now, I like Niagara Falls (the city) just fine, I'm a sucker for tourist trap neon glow-in-the-dark kitchey nonsense so it's right up my alley, but I never understood why anyone gave a darn about the Falls. It's water going over an edge, nothing new or unique about that. But people get so excited... and trying to see it through the eyes of someone who's never seen it before is a lovely idea.

I will say that my sister moved to Manitoba some years ago, and any time she's in town, she gets so excited to see rolling hills. Rural Southern Ontario is about 95% bumps, but she gets so happy to see it... makes me appreciate them much more.

Also, as a matter of perspective, I learned a few months ago that Brits who visit are often thrown off by the Great Lakes. Now, to me, someone who lives between three of them, they're lovely (especially Huron), but they're... ya know, they're just lakes.

Turns out my standard for a lake-- large enough that you can't see anything but water and sky in all directions if you're out on a boat (or for a swim, but that's not recommended generally for safety reasons)-- is not common elsewhere? When I see something called a lake and I can see the other side, I generally refer to it as a "small lake" or "large pond"... perspective is a strange thing.

Ramble over, thank you for coming to my TEDTalk.

[atealiers]

WELCOME AGENT NEON

[sprayededges]

i think rory gilmore would read trashy romance books with full confidence

[ahurumustdie]

tell me about your crush!!!!!!!

(patroklos-mlm)

they’re a really cool person and i admire them a lot; i admire their strength and their creativity and how they can be so shameless about things they do. 

they’re one of my best friends, and i love them a lot even outside of a romantic sense. honestly, having a crush on them is something that’s just kinda... there, in the background. it doesn’t really affect how i interact with them (though i am more self-conscious than i’d be with my other friends) it’s just a soft warm feeling that i have when we talk. it makes me wanna make them happy. it makes me subject myself to motion sickness just because they send me a link to a twitch stream. they’re the first person i think of when something funny happens in my life, and the first person i think to go to when i’m upset about something. 

on good days they’re unfortunately subjected to every single one of my weird and random thoughts bc i just wanna involve them; and on bad days i just keep my phone close to me. 

they’re nice and funny and have this skewed belief that i’m cool even though they are clearly cooler than i’ll ever be- like, they always seem really surprised when people find them interesting or cool and it just fascinates me because "birds of a feather flock together” yknow?? 

and they’re so talented and ridiculous and they make fun of me for not being able to cook which makes me want to cook more just to prove them wrong and they’re half the reason i manage to make it through some days. 

they’re just seriously one of the best people i have the pleasure of knowing and saying i have a crush on them sounds childish but i also feel like i can’t be faulted for it. i don’t get crushes easily so i feel like that’s a testament to how fantastic they are. 

-

i’m pretty sure they’ll read this and know it’s about them so, hi lmao.

[brsrkdrive]

Asushin shippers after seeing the new promo art: oM G!!?! THEY A RE SO GONNA BE FUC K I N GSFJB CA N O N!!1

Me:

[neon-city-dreams]

I think all of this advice is solid, as well as Kingmaker's own views on the matter, and I'll keep my opinion on the matter brief, considering Panda and King both have already covered the areas I wanted to touch upon.

But from my personal experience, writer's block can come from internal or external pressures. Internal being anything from your own motivation or your own opinion of your work. This could be a result of your ideas not coming across the way you want them to. This is something I've had a personal struggle with. Especially while trying to write The Red Queen chapter of Neon City Knights. It's just something that happens.

However, this isn't to say that your execution or the idea itself is wrong. Sometimes it's just an issue with rhythm and pacing. Allow me to use a personal example. In the aftermath of both Calliope's Box and The First Knight, the plot begins to move forward again. Now the general idea of The Red Queen was basically

You can't sleep

Check up on Dami

Calliope informs you of the status of the other knights

You get a text from Gahyeon, who can't sleep, so you decide to meet to talk. 

None of these are wrong, especially when you think in the self-enclosed confines of each chapter. But when you begin to think of what has happened to these characters in the last 24 hours, it starts becoming a bit much.

Party

Mansion events

Muse and Trials

Recovery

Conversation with Dami

Conversation with Calliope

And that's not including what I had planned initially for Red Queen, and while I enjoy what I have planned for the Gahyeon section of Red Queen, it just feels like I'm cramming too much into one day as well as one section. After all, despite enjoying the character interactions I have written, it just feels a bit monotonous, especially when you break it down to three character interactions one after another. So, of course, the solution would be to make something unexpected and/or exciting happen. However, The Reader has already gone through enough, and making too many dramatic events happen concurrently can be a bit exhausting to read, and you'll feel a need to one-up each event. 

Instead, I think it's best to either move time forward, reference an earlier memory or jump to another perspective for a time. I've seen Panda and Kingmaker do this beautifully and wonderfully. But I suppose I've become distracted by the technical aspect, so apologies. But what I'm trying to say is too much rising action and/or falling action can be a cause of writer's block, at least in my experience. Of course, what I've suggested won't always work, and at that point, I'd follow Kingmaker or Panda's advice of just consuming content to become inspired.

As for external factors that could be causing writer's block, that usually falls to stress, depression, or general neglect of one's self. Take some time to get something to eat and just relax. Go for a walk, watch a movie, hang out with your friends or just socialize in general. Your mind and body are the world's most delicate instruments capable of limitless possibilities like storytelling, music, and feats of great skill, strength, and determination. But even the sharpest sword dulls and falls to ruin if not adequately maintained. So don't treat yourself like a machine that's meant to endless pump out content. But if you're going to anyway, remember that machines require regular maintenance to perform perfectly anyway okay and I'm rooting for anybody that wants to start writing, so don't hesitate to tag or message me 💗

Also, apologies for hijacking the post and how long this ended up being, especially when I said I'd keep it brief.

Any advice to anybody that's yet to start writing or anyone suffering from writer's block?

Hi anon! I think that I’ve seen one or two of my mutual answer this question, so I’ll do my best to help as well. (If any of my writing mutual haven’t recieved this question, then I encourage them to reblog with their own advice as well!

The biggest tip I would give to someone who wants to start writing is to start writing. It may sound redundant, but it works. Keep a journal. Actively take notes in class. Write paragraphs about a song you like. Just write, write, write as much as you can whenever you feel like it. The more you write, the easier it gets. Sentences will flow smoother, you’re able to write about more topics, and your grammar improves immensely; trust me. My earliest works that I wrote when I was 13-14 were not good, but they helped me become the writer that I am today.

For writer’s block, I would offer this single quote: “Find inspiration in the strange and unusual.” Close your writing document and search for inspiration in something other than a blank page. You’re not going to find anything there.

Go out in nature and observe how the trees and flowers move in the wind. Re-watch your favorite TV show/movie and watch how the characters interact with each other. Scroll through Instagram and Pinterest and save/bookmark the images that you like. Google search images of your bias(es) and save your favorites. Click on the first Spotify playlist that pops up and let yourself drown in the atmosphere of the music. Read that book that you’ve been meaning to read. Take a nap and let your mind relax.

No matter what you do, make sure that whatever piece of writing that you’re working on is the furthest thing in your mind. There’s no deadline for a piece of fan fiction, and everyone enjoys quality over quantity.

When you feel refreshed and ready to write, come back to that same document. I guarantee that you won’t view it in the same way.

I hope this helped! Let me know if you need any more advice on writing or anything else! Take it easy, anon. I love you so much. 💕

[bisexualhobi]

Girl, listen. You're well versed in music, industry know how, and other stuff. Let's say you're about to debut in a girl group. Who's your agency, how many members, what's your concept and sound? :D

omg this is such a fun question!!

i would either debut under high up entertainment - stayc's company!! they were founded by producer duo black eyed pilseung and they have a great ear for what's in style and what can be innovative music wise. or i would go the obvious way and debut with SM just because i truly love the artistic vision in that company and bc of all the idols that would be my coworkers lmaooo

tbh i think i would have to debut in a 5-7 member group. less than 5 can be boring and any slip ups are more obvious and more than 7 makes it hard to stand out. i think 6 would be the sweet spot

my concept would have to be grown women. not exactly a sexy women concept but all my band mates would have to be over the age of 23. think EXID, brown eyed girls, sistar etc. like we're talking about WOMEN and I don't wanna see none of that schoolgirl shit or cutesy bubblegum concepts. BUT I would not have a girl crush concept either cause that's too boring.

I think my group would have a very neon glitter party concept but a little editorial. like I don't wanna say euphoria aesthetic but kinda euphoria aesthetic. this is a little moodboard I just put together to show you lol

like this would be our debut and everyone would be GAGGED idc idc like the teasers could be handheld camcorder videos with that fuzzy texture from vhs and it's just ourselves recording each other on a night out... and ofc we would be slutty but not from a male gaze perspective. like I imagine all the korean incel men just crying about it on knet forums cause we're not showing skin the way they want to LMAO

and lastly.... for the music. WHEWWW boy. I have so many different ideas but I'm gonna go with my first choice and just say it would be very much a hyperpop infused bass heavy hiphop sound with dreamy synths and a thumping beat. something that would PLAY AT THE CLUB!!!! this is my mood sampler:

sooo yeah thanks for coming to my tedtalk lmao <333

[neonmetro]

outis is scared of the head...... if the olympians are the head then that puts a Lot of things into perspective

THIS OLD WOMAN HAS PISSED THE GOVERNMENT PERSONALLY FIVE TIMES OVER AND IS STILL SOMEHOW ALIVE

[cosmicaces]

Perhaps one of my favorite things about this current iteration of The Moomins is the characterization we see Snufkin having. He’s still this calm, collected figure that others occasionally rely on for advice in the most stressful of situations. However, this version has shown that he isn’t always like that. As a matter of fact, it seems like it's apart of a persona he’s created to hide how he really can be.

Personal Space and Physical Contact

It’s made clear in the series that Snufkin needs to be alone at times, and that it’s something that’s very important to him. Now, what’s interesting about Moominvalley’s take on this is that they also portray him as needing personal space. This is really evident in Episode 2, where Ti-ti-uu joins him at his campfire.

What’s important to note is his posture. Notice how he’s leaning away from Ti-ti-uu, even after scooching away? He isn’t comfortable with him being there. He wants to be alone, but he also doesn’t want to be rude towards his guest. However, when Ti-ti-uu starts to move closer, he jumps up to his feet and starts backing away.

Once more, his posture and the way he’s responding is important to acknowledge. He’s holding his hands out, he looks unsure, uncomfortable, this isn’t necessarily a situation he wants to be in. It ends up to the point where he’s backed himself into a corner and responds aggressively, saying that perhaps he won’t go to Moominvalley at all this year before shouting that he just wants to be alone.

On the subject of physical contact/affection, it seems that he’s not always comfortable with it, either. In Episode 3, upon reuniting with Moomintroll, he doesn’t return his hug. Then, it seems as though Moomintroll remembers something, commenting “Oh, yeah,” before acknowledging Snufkin by name.

That said, there have been multiple instances where he would hold onto Moomintroll. Speaking from personal experience, this is very familiar to me, being someone who hates it when other people put a hand on my shoulder or hug me, but loving the action when I’m the one who initiates it. Based on this, it seems that Snufkin deals with that too.

Social Anxiety

As pointed out by others, this series has established that Snufkin deals with social anxiety. What really demonstrates it is the party scene we witness in Episode 7, “Snufkin vs. The Park Ranger.”

The first important thing to note is his expression upon being asked. I’ll talk about it’s significance afterwards.

Now, as with Ti-Ti-uu, body language is incredibly important here. His shoulders are tense, he’s leaning away from Moomintroll, and his expression reads as discomfort. His struggle here is that, to put it simply, he’s not enjoying himself at the party. However, he’s there for Moomin, and he knows that if he noticiably shows that he’s not comfortable, there’s a risk of upsetting Moomintroll. However, it gets to that point that, when Moomintroll leaves to refill their drinks...

...he leaves. By coming to the party, he’s put himself in a stressful situation. On one hand, he could stay and risk hurting his mental health (I don’t know about you, but if I stay too long at parties that I’m anxious at, I shut down and it’s difficult getting me to respond to things) or leaving while keeping his sanity intact. No matter what, both situations would upset Moomintroll.

Now, I brought up his earlier expression upon Little My’s question because it’s evident that he feels guilty about this. It seems he was trying to push it into the back of his mind, but he was simply unable too. On top of that, when Snufkin locked himself in jail and Moomintroll decided the punishment, it shows that Snufkin thought back to the party and comments “I suppose it’s all I deserve”. He believed that the reason why Moomintroll came up with the punishment was due to him deserting him at the party.

However, he soon finds out that that wasn’t the reason for the punishment, and that it was simply Moomintroll coming up with a clever solution to get his sentence done faster by utilizing the help of the Woodies.

Loneliness and Similarity to the Groke

Going back a few episodes, after Ti-Ti-uu left Snufkin alone at the campfire, Snufkin becomes upset at seeing he is now alone, commenting that he must be ill due to feeling lonely. Upon waking up in the nightmare, he hears a sound. Considering the fog he breathes and him feeling lonely, we can assume that what he heard was the Groke, due to her connection with loneliness.

(It’s easier to see in motion, but if you look carefully you can see the fog.)

Now, as brought up by a friend, Snufkin is similar to the Groke in a sense. Like the Groke, he’s more active in the night. Additionally, he comments how the Groke reflects one’s own fears and that she’s constantly searching for the light. Now, what was it that helped guide him back to Moominvalley...

...but the light emanating from Moomintroll’s room.

There isn’t exactly much to go off of here, but it’s good to keep in mind.

Fears, Hiding, and Ending Thoughts

As brought up by this wonderful analysis posted by @ snuufsnuuf, Snufkin has a fear of being forgotten and/or replaced. This is important to bring up before this next section.

It was brought up that Snufkin’s discomfort around Moomintroll in the party could be due to him harboring a crush on him. With this in mind, and knowing that Snufkin is alright with physical affection given that he’s the one who initiates it, it’s good to know this:

From experience and as often portrayed in media, holding hands or leaning against something can really be grounding, especially if one is nervous. It lets you know that you aren’t alone, and that someone is there for you.

Keeping this in mind, there is a possibility that Snufkin wanted to hold onto Moomintroll to help him feel less anxious. However, he’s created this persona of himself, where others view him as calm, collected, able to keep a level-head even in the most stressful of situations, and as someone who isn’t usually too fond of physical contact. Now, if he were to reach out to Moomintroll, the thing is...they’re at a party. It’s in a public area, everyone can see what happens.

One of the first things that came to mind with this scene was this conversation that occurs in Night in the Woods between Mae and Angus:

(As a quick side note: one of the common themes of being closeted in media is feeling safe in the darkness. Knowing that Snufkin is more active/seemingly has more energy at night and appears to be more comfortable in the dark, well)

Now, with all of this brought up (and hopefully still in your mind), I want you to consider this. As much as we love Moomin and Snufkin’s relationship, it’s flawed, namely due to their severe lack of communication.

Moomintroll can be selfish, and he often thinks that he knows what’s best for everyone, or that x will enjoy y (ex. Wanting Snorkmaiden to believe that he’s brave due to “chasing off” the ghost, bringing Ninny back to her Aunt’s house). Going back to the party, it doesn’t even seem that he noticed Snufkin’s body language that revealed his discomfort in the situation.

As for Snufkin, he hides a lot to try and keep Moomintroll happy. He did his best to hide his discomfort at the party, he gave away his beloved hat due to it having the dragon sleeping within and not wanting to further upset Moomintroll and then proceeds to lie to keep him happy. Now, the main reason I brought up his fear of being forgotten is...well, one of the things of coming with that fear is sacrificing and hiding a lot in order to keep someone happy as well as putting yourself in stressful situations. With that fear comes the paranoia that if they find out that you aren’t exactly who you’ve made yourself out to be, they’ll leave you, and then you’re left all alone again.

To end it off, at the end of Episode 12, Too Ticky said this:

“There’s lots of lost souls out there that need to be heard.”

Afterwards, “I’m Ready Now” begins to play, and we receive a scene of Moominvalley as it begins to snow. When we hear the lyrics “But I didn’t know how so we took it in turns, to my surprise, we found my words”, we see Snufkin as he leaves Moominvalley.

And then it cuts out, and we’re left with the credits.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.

Additional Credits:

neon @ neonjays on twitter

gabby @ 384hen on twitter

[akyaea22]

How did Eve get into Twisted Wonderland:

A post where I go way too deep about theoretical physics and stuff that I researched for a fic.

(Spoilers for “Down the Rabbit Hole” Chapter 5) 

(Semi-Spoilers for Prologue Chapter 4)

Alright, here’s some background knowledge about wormholes/parallel universes and whatnot. I don’t actually study these topics, I just find them incredibly interesting, so if you see anything incorrect, feel free to flame me in the replies/comments/whatever they’re called.

If you don’t want the background knowledge or you just want to skip further down, I’ll mark the end of the background exposition with a line.

Ok, so I’m pretty sure everyone is familiar with the concept of worm holes and parallel universes, right? Hollywood has drilled it into our heads with their sci-fi movies and whatnot.

Imagine the universe as a flat sheet of paper. If you fold it in half, and then violently stab a pencil through it, the pencil serves as the worm hole, connecting the two ends together. Theoretically, if you travel through the worm hole, you’d end up on the other side of the universe in a fraction of the time it would take for you to actually travel the universe if it wasn’t folded.

Parrallel universes. You all heard the whole NASA thing where they might’ve (Key word: might have. Meaning: Maybe. Possibly) found evidence of a parallel universe where time travels backwards? If not, uhh- look it up. It’s interesting. So a parallel universe is basically another universe, just different. How different? Movies and books usually make them similar to our universe, but slightly different. This is because they don’t want the reader/watcher to feel too out of place. Why explain a bunch of new and unfamiliar concepts when you can just tweak a couple things, slap a new label on it, and call it a day? On the other hand, there probably are some books and movies out there that actually do take you to a new universe, but even then, they usually keep the basic stuff the same. There’s gravity (probably), air (also probably), and the Sun (listen, I haven’t seen every piece of media that’s ever been made so please take this list with a grain of salt.)

The thing is, in another universe, everything could be different. The laws of physics as we know them in this world cannot be applied to the other universe. Gravity could just not exist, stars could suck in heat instead of radiating it, black holes could shoot out matter. It would all be possible, because it’s in a different universe. The new universe don’t gotta play by our rules.

———————————-

Have any of these things actually been proven? No. They haven’t. Right now, they only exist in the realm of theoretical physics. Basically meaning, theoretically, this could happen, but we don’t really know yet.

While “Down the Rabbit Hole” isn’t a “The Martian” level story with absolute scientific details down to the smallest detail, there is some level of science involved.

(Spoilers for Chapter 5 “Down the Rabbit Hole” Last Warning)

In Chapter 5, Eve mentions worm holes and parallel universes when Crowley brings up the fact that she might be from another world. Neither of the characters explicitly confirm that that’s how Eve got into the Twisted Wonderland universe, but it’s what I’m sticking with for now. (Watch this post get outdated as my indecisive self starts to come up with more stuff)

I decided to shove some science into my fic because I didn’t want to go down the “They were thrown into the universe because magic” path. I’m not saying that there’s anything wrong with that path either. I just prefer the science-y path because I find that it’s incredibly interesting to read and write about these things that could possibly exist. (And that you could possibly be isekai’d into another world, but that’s beside the point.)

Is this the last time that I’m gonna shove some science into my story? Uhh- no. I’m probably gonna use it here and there at times if I can. If there’s an opportunity to explain something, I’ll take it. Will it be a long-winded essay on how random stuff in the Twisted Wonderland universe works? No. I have my limits. I’m not gonna research how Grim breathing fire works and the possible effects it would have on his body. While an interesting topic, I get that readers wouldn’t want to sift through that in the middle of a story. It’ll probably get waved away under the “Hey, it’s a parallel universe with different rules, so you don’t have to question it.” rug.

List of random questions I have: (These are for my own reference to satisfy my burning curiosity, so you can stop reading here if you want.)

Is the universe actually flat though? Isn’t the Earth a sphere so wouldn’t that wipe the theory off the map?

Why is the worm hole shown to be this kind of like cinched cylinder? Why not a normal cylinder or a rectangular prism or something?

Do the ends (following the paper metaphor) actually touch? Diagrams show that they don’t touch, forming more of a U-shape.

What’s the space in between? I know it’s hyperspace, but what is it specifically?

What happens to the stuff that is on the folded part? It’s curved, so does the stuff curve with it? (Imagine a flat planet curving.)

How much energy does it take to create this thing? How are they even created?

What’s with all the types of stuff? (Dark matter, Exotic matter, Negative energy, Repulsive gravity, etc.)

How do you find out if a parallel universe exists? It’s not gonna be in blinking neon signs, so do you just wait for some kind of sign? Do you wait for a random portal to open and someone steps out claiming to be from another universe, or is there actually something you can detect to figure out if another universe exists?

You wouldn’t be able to even enter another universe without risking death. Like, the other universe could have toxic chemicals replacing all of the oxygen atoms. We don’t know what’s there. Why would we want to find these things anyways? (I mean, aside from just the feeling of “Oh neat. There’s another universe”)

The entire parallel universe thing is just a giant question mark.

Did I spend too much time thinking about this? Yes. Yes I did. Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.

[clowngremlin]

i didnt really post about it yesterday, but i hung out with two pals from trans group!!! we hung out at my house for a bit, and then got slurpees and went to the park!! one of them was one of my best friends, and the other was one of the Youths, but like im kind of like an older brother to him so we do stuff and hang out!! anyways, we were talking about some stuff, and my younger friend was like “spencer ur literally the reason i feel comfortable wearing neon colours and funky clothing” because we had been talking about how he feels like he cant be himself at school and i was like ;_; like im out here, living my life, being who i want to be, and i can give hope to kids who are like me!!!! and if that’s not one of the best things i could be doing with my life, idk what is!! and also like, as well as me being able to let the Youths see they can like be themselves and present themselves however they want and be happy and stuff, the Youths also teach me stuff....my younger friend really likes twenty one pilots, and i had mentioned how i used to love them, but stopped listening to them a lil while ago because people made fun of me and also it brought up a lot of Bad Memories associated with late 2015-early 2016, and he was like “you can’t let people or bad times ruin something u love!!!!! u should try to listen to them again!!!” and last night, i listened to the new album and redownloaded my favorite album (blurryface lol) into my ipod and idk....it was nice!! im very careful to not put down the Youths interests, and it has actually helped me get into things i would have never thought to get into, but also helped me rediscover things i used to really love but felt like i couldnt like anymore because it’s “””””cringe””””” to like it or like adults cant like that sort of thing..... like man cringe culture is dead, if someone’s interests arent like harmful, we shouldnt make fun of them!!! i know it’s like cool to hate 21p, so i like wont post much about it but like, the music means a lot to me and really helped me through some bad times when i was an 18-19!! also like i really cant stress this enough and i could write hundreds of posts on cringe culture and how it’s shitty, but like, calling stuff kids like “cringe” is just so shitty, like im so careful to not say anything mean about the things the Youths like at group, even if i dont care much for it, but like....giving things a chance is cool!! like i really like TAZ and podcasts now because the Youths would always talk about them at group and sdfhsd im like that meme where steve bushcemi is like “what’s up fellow kids” because i try to be Hip with the Youths and try to know what they’re talking about, so i started listening to TAZ and some other podcasts they have mentioned and i love them!! also like giving 21p a chance again was really nice for me, because i had a weird sad moment in the shower last night where i got really scared for the state of the world and my mind went into a really dark place and i had a hard time getting out of it, so i listened to the new album and i felt better!!! i didnt like it as much as blurryface, but it was still fun!! im like really all over the place today with my thoughts because my meds haven’t really kicked in and im super tired and this post went in 5 different directions but like i just have a lot to say......anyways tldr i love the Youths from the trans support group i go to, and i think adults should give more of a chance to things kids are into and learn about their interests and also like by being urself, u can show kids in ur life that it’s like ok to be different and be themselves!!!!!! thanks for coming to my tedtalk if u read all this u are the most valid person alive and i love u!!!!

[heyitssmim]

It’s 3 on a dark rainy night in the middle of an Organ forest, it’s the middle of fall. I’m standing outside of my motel room, probably smoking a cigarette, the occasional car zooming down the wet nearby highway. I’m watching the neon red ‘V’ on the vacancy sign flicker. I’m ready to probably hang myself when i get back into my motel room.

welcome to my tedtalk

[lifesabitchgetoverit-blog]

Mood

I just feel like neon lights and smoke are such a mood. Thanks for listening to my TEDtalk