#ngl what they have is pretty fucked up but its amazing for fiction and the fact that the dynamics constantly shift ;_;

[potahun]

My boy fang duobing when he said something to the effect of ‘yeah well im angry at him but doesnt mean i hate him’ is very much part of why all his and li lianhua’s pseudo breakups and reconciliations dont feel like too much drama

They’re like that. It’s his personality vs li lianhua’s way of being and the love languages that clash but the love is there and they are aware. Especially fang duobing. he knows he's in there for the long haul

[journalsouppe]

UNWOUND FUTURE RAAHHHHHHHH!!! What an AMAZING trilogy conclusion with such a perfect setup for future sequels. I cannot recommend playing Professor Layton enough.

All of the Professor Layton stickers are from @jordydrawsmerch which can be found here and here. Every other sticker is from Daiso!

All the writing is typed below!

Rating: 9.3 Played: Fa 2023 Port: HD mobile (iPad) Favorite? Y Replayable? Y Recommend? Y

Comments:

the way the PM walked T^T

LMFAO STACHENSCARFEN

Layton’s about to be beat up bc of his top hat (skull emoji)

Getting major DGS 2-3 vibes

FAMILY GOON

An arc arcade? You’re speaking my language

I LOVE THE BLOCK HAT PUZZLE PIECES SPELLING LAYTON IN JAPANESE!!!

FLORA STICKER

BABY LAYTON BLUSHING IM SCREAMING

I really love the picture book and its music

THE DEVIL IN THE TOP HAT NOO

Luke always takes the opportunity to roast the Laytonmobile (skull emoji)

THEYRE JUST SHOOTING AT EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING

THE ORIGINS OF LAYTONS HAT IM GONNA CRY T^T

I love that bi Luke has his own puzzle solving sequence

Where the fuck did you take us future Luke

The battle of wits was so fun omg

I cant get over evil Layton

BIG LUKE AND LITTLE LUKE

Omg Hershel in the background

Based p. Layton newspaper conversation

LMFAO Hershel trespassing and Luke stressed

The bee???? T^T

FLORA PUZZLE SOLVED SEQUENCE T^T!!!!

GO OFF FLORA!!!!

Ooo pretty Chinese arc

Hershel i swear

Hmmm young sir… who is big Luke?

NOT AVOGADRO

Did all the scientists piss their pants?

I have a lot of questions

Love the design and music of the pagoda

Where tf did Hershel go (skull emoji)

Omg Luke’s a Sherlock fan

I feel like Layton was replaced with evil Layton

I swear Dimitri had a mustache??

THE BARS

WHERE IS FLORA

DON PAOLO LMAO

THE LUKE MOBING SCENE MAKES ME WANT TO CRY

How many secret hideouts are there T_T

NOOO FLORA

The barkeep is v sketch

Chad laytonmobile

I can see how this game inspired dgs

THE KAZUMA AND CLIVE PARALLELS ARE DRIVING ME CRAZY

BEASLY AND PUZZLETTE HOLY SHIT

“That’s funny” :[

Ive been side eyeing some of these designs the past 2 games but yeah bostro’s design is def racist

DON PAOLO TURNIGN EVIL BC OF CLAIRE LOVING HERSHEL LMAO T-T and the running into the river omfg

Working with don paolo has been fun

I DIDNT THINK LAYTON WOULD ACTUALLY CUT THE ROPE

Where did Layton learn all this about Clive??

Summary:

WHAT A PHENOMENAL GAME!!! Truly what a great “conclusion” to the main trilogy. You learn so much about Layton, Luke, flora, and many other characters like don paolo. The ending reveal of Clive was CRAZY. It really reminded me of movies like howls moving castle/the iron giant. I also just love how complex Clive is. He was driven to violence because of how the government treated him and his family, but he never truly wanted to hurt people. He was without any hope and thought mass destruction would finally bring some change to the government, but he also made sure to include Layton in his plans because he so desperately wanted someone to stop him. It’s tragic and terrorism definitely wasn’t the way to go but at least this is a fictional story and that death machine looked kinda sick Ngl. The story of Layton and Claire was also so tragic yet so healing. Layton could finally take off his hat without feeling grief, you never would’ve known he was hurting that much. I loved Claire, she seemed like such an amazing person and I’m glad Layton wasn’t swayed to try to bring her back, although he did falter when he had to say goodbye again. Although I highly enjoyed the game, I am slightly disappointed there was no actual evil Layton. How fun would a game with evil Layton be omg. The whole game constantly caught me by surprise, even by small scenes like Beasly and PUZZLETTE. I’m still a littel confused about the lab experiments with Gumbo and subject 3, I’m not quire sure why they added that plot (and have no resolution) but I liked Gumbo fine. My favorite coin animal will always be hot dog though. I cannot recommend this series enough, I am having the time of my life. I can also see how DGS was heavily inspired by these games and im so glad about it bc dgs was game changing. I can’t believe there was a 26 year wait in between UF and NWOS but im glad to be a Layton fan :’) so fucking glad!!!!

[selfox]

The return of fic reactions.

Still going with @gothicthundra 's Random Tales of Drakgo and I want to finish this amazing behemoth of a fic 😤 I wanna get to recently released last chapter still >:(

Spoilers for chapters from Failure till No Mistletoe Needed ahead and as well as unhinged yelling

Ngl I'm very embarrassed that I read it so slow, its sporadic and limited these days (plus other internal issues, like being a big big pussy) which as lover of fiction in general feels unacceptable >:( so you might see me complaining about myself here ^^”

Failure

Holy shoot, I didn't expect the action with big-ish injuries rjsjsjs

Drakken rushing to save Shego is doing something for me. Including him sharing his coat to warm her up

Omfg, Shego🤣 I need to draw this

OTL you two with your head injuries

Welp

Why does their bickering brings me so much comfort?

How?

Shego, you're a sly fox

I am laughing so hard rn

“Shego... Can... Can I borrow your hand for a moment” pffff thats what HE said 🤣🤣🤣 sorry, dr D, but 🤣🤣🤣

«"You know most fatal falls of the elderly happen in the bathroom,” Shego's voice came from the crack in the door » Shego, you'll not help him like that xD

Told ya so. Now I understand the name of this chapter more. Poor Dr D.

Oh FUCK

OH FUCK??

Oh geez dude OTL

Yeah I would check on him too........ Do they end up in the same bed, cus that would be easier for keeping an eye on him?

Called it.

Drakken and his adhd episode xxx

.... Hello depression, my old friend

You both need a therapy

SHEGO OH MY FUCKING GOD DAMN DAYM

🥺😭🥹🥺

Drew, you are so very easy to startle

Set-backs

DAAAWWW that pillow fort art!

Sidenote, as I've noticed how much chapter names been bamboozling me into thinking worse. Now to those double meaning names

Drakken are you building pillow fort? I would

Heheheeee

The picture of baby Drew and baby Eddie in a cardboard rocket tent brings me so much joy I didn't know I needed

Now I want to build my own fort after work

You're never old for pillow forts, Shego

Hehe

I went from feeling utter adoration of this, to having bittersweet feelings, to laughing my ass off

OTL "it's just you" ma'am, this phase can be interpreted either trusting him, or, knowing him, he'd thi nk that he isn't enough to be considered as potential romantic partner and I am glad that you realize that, but I WISH YOU'D LOOK AT HIM CUS I'M CERTAIN THAT HE DOESN'T LOOK RELIEVED

see

🤦🏽

OTL oh Shego, dear

Drakken the specter cedcdc

Fvgvgvggvgnaj

Nah Shego, it was a perfect way to get ya outta brain gloop

I really wish to see Grandma Pru ; ^; she sounds delightful

I want to hug them both

DREW DID YOU ALWAYS THOUGHT

YES HE ALWAYS. WITH SHAWNA AND SHEGO.

I'm seeing patterns.

Im definitely seeing patterns, Drew. Idk if I find it endearing or I want to shake some sense into him.

DREW TURN ON YOUR BRAIN. SHE PRACTICALLY GAVE YOU THE ANSWER.

SHEGO YOU KNOW HE IS A DUMBASS WITH GETTING IF PRETTY LADIES LIKE HIM. HE NEEDS POINT BLANK “I LIKE YOU” JUST KISSING HIM SILLY WONT WORK. HE JUST PROVED THAT TO YOU. TALK.

SHEGO NO YOU OTL YOU DO UNDERSTAND THAT IT DOES FEEL LIKE A TEASING? NO?! OF COURSE NOT. I WANT TO SHAKE BOTH OF THEM AND FUCKING ADLIP WHAT THRY MEAN TO ONE ANOTHER! THEY NEED A FUCKING TRANSLATOR-MEDIATOR

Boneheaded little big shits

I am physically clenching my fists

Pls, does that mean she is stealing blankets in her sleep or is it a plot to make him cuddle her?

Correction, its a plot for her to cuddle him

Now the question of the day. Is she asleep or nah?

YES YES YES!

Oh gods. I need a breather. Oh gods. Do I laugh or cry???

Welp, she is awake.

I want so hard to shake them.

Those two are so similar in their thought process. Just SPEAK.

GUYS.

CAN SOMEONE WRITE AN ALT TO THIS WHERE THEY ACTUALLY TALK THINGS OUT. AND FINALLY HAVE THAT MAKE OUT SESSION? I AM NOT EVEN ASKING FOR A ROMP, CUS THOSE TWO DON'T NEED IT. JUST TALK YOU TWO IMBECILES. CUS MY GODS THEY DON'T NEED THEIR RELATIONSHIP START OUT AS JUST LUST.

:WHEEEEEZE: THEY ARE STUPID, YOUR HONOR

«We both could have handled that better," muttered Shego» - ya think?

“more head-shaking idiocy this way” oh I sure hope so

The Elephant in the Room

Shego, maybe thats why, he has such a hard time to understand if you see him as something more?

OTL Drakken...

Well I guess his impromptu dives into the moat can do that to a man

Shego, why are you a cat?

They are precious, your honor

SHEGO MY GODS

SHEGO

Guys, please, get a therapy

«We need to talk about the elephant in the room," her voice was right at the door.

Drakken strung a series of words in his head that would make his mother faint.»

Why do I feel like there will be LITERAL elephant?

Knew it

They are husband and wife.

… why do I feel the impending doom. Something definitely gonna happen in that pool.

DEAN! ohoh thats probably will not be good.

Helpful Hypotheticals

I am fear

*looks at the illustration* Shego~

I am so afraid of reading this chapter

Yep I was afraid to turn the page >:( for a long time. It's embarrassing to me as a reader.

Hyperfocuse, Drakken, can happen frequently.

OTL

He is so afraid of her leaving

“this is ridiculous” - you both are ridiculous in your inability to have heart to heart conversations. Is there a thing? Couples therapy for villains-partners-that-obviously-in-love-with-one-another?

You don't know how much I irrationally feared reading this chapter. I enjoy this dynamic between Shego and Dean. But even now reading it, I feel how I am clenched. And I *know* that as soon as I finish this chapter it'll pass.... Until Drakken and Shego start being stupid again

Dean, why was I so afraid of you? You are cool. Call her out. Please.

Is he gonna be all fan boy at Drakken? Please! Please!

*WHEEEZE*

OK, NOW I FEEL SO EMBARRASSED FOR BEING SUCH A PUSSYCAT

«“Are you going to continue to push buttons?” asked Drakken as he leaves back but kept his eyes locked on hers.

“Always”»

👌👌👌

Hello jealous Drakken

Heheheh

Fanboy fanboy fanboy!

Federal accountant.... Is he working for GJ??

*forensic?* ok im definitely loving this guy.

Hehe Shego, c'mon let the guy sing xD you like it! You even had this song on your ringtone! FUCKING LMAO I DIDN'T EVEN READ THIS LINE! CALLED IT CALLED IT!

OOOOOOO Dean, Dean! Please help them!

That feeling that I'm also internally moving closer to him lol

LOL Shego is about to get sandwiched. LOL Dr. D, I'll disappoint you, she definitely wasn't angry 😏 and she definitely wouldn't mind you guys being this close to her more~

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 oh guys. I need to draw it 🤣🤣🤣

Ok, I definitely need to draw Drakken in that dress

Oh oh. Oh oh. Ohohh. Drakken.. Morr like she agreed for a date with Dean because he reminded her of you

OTL oough baby boy OTL

“you meant you. She'd prefer anyone but you...” OTL ough baby boy, how wrong you are OYL

Deck the lair with too much tinsel

Hehe, sweet tooth shego

Shego, thats why he can't get if you like him or not

Ooohhhh thats when those 2 got together.

Oh no Shego, he is. Why would he admit that openly to you? Plus... To be honest it's kinda reasonable fear.

MA'AM

Jdjdjd you both are children

Reverse psychology?

Poor guy, never stood a chance

Boys and their toys

*sigh in idiots being married*

I love how this world is so tied together. This whole story. Not just the jacket.

I bet a dollar that Cleo helped a lot with this party

Hi Lucre!

..... Mentoring Ed..... As far as I understand .... Mmmaybeee?

That feeling that I'm also waiting for Cleo and Ed to pull their own shit together.

Ok I started to focus more on reading xD it's getting so very interesting.

A few notes on Shego, IMHO its sweet that she looks into more stuff for him and that she does see that he is in well evil-scheme-block

“why am I always surrounded by nerds?” - the cost of the evil profession, Shego. And considering that you are in love with another nerd and are interested in another....

Drakken speaking with Adrena about Lucre… first time for anything

TRIO OF MISCHIEF!

And F Drakken, I believe you got in the middle of a lovers spat xD

YAY THEY FOUND ONE ANOTHER!

Heheheh bi very dorks.... I need to draw those three xD man... So many plans, so little time... And always on a work trip xD

Adrena is adorable

Yes, thats definitely both Cleo's and Ed's party

Х)very classy, Eddie

This… isn't gonna bode well

No mistletoe needed

Aw, girlie 🥺 even though I personally don't see the appeal of this game, I get it

OTL "it's just kissing ... Stop being so uptight. It's meaningless.” fuuuuu I just know how Drakken gonna think

*props cheek on my fist* you guys, no wonder either villains ship you or think that you are already married

SHEGO WHY DID YOU LIE OTL

I want to hit both of them with a pillow

They are such dorks, I love them. Even Eddie. Cus of this fic, Eddie just grew on me, even if I want to throttle him on occasion

They are such a dorky family OMG. Their banter is so beautiful. And I understand Camille saying its weird. Well those 3 celebrated major family holidays

ADRENA

NO MORE ALCOHOL INDEED

Oh gods, so many pairings 🤣🤣

I'm so glad I've never had to experience this game

YAY THOSE TWO

I will laugh if Duff's spin would land back on Monty

Nope

Eddie, EVEN I JUMPED, GT HOW DID YOU DO THAT???

F Duff

F Fist

LOL I CALLED IT KINDA, sorry Fist, but I'm too much of an ass. Were you cleansing your palate?

Id say polycule

Oh those two hate one another

Oh those two HATE one another

Those 2 shouldn't mix alcohol

Why I got the feeling of impending doom?

Oh gods those 2 are playing with fire one greed fire and other from monster truck.

*gif not looking at it*

*series of several unintelligent noises*

Well, yes, of course, she is trying to make him mad.

«“why is your face red?”

“....I was laughing”»

Press X to doubt

To She-She's POV

Drakken and Adrena is such a weird mix

“It's just a game” not if you have so many unresolved issues, guys. That phase hurts them both so much.

*snort* does that count as indirect kissing?

Children and their booze

I audibly cursed. Oh god Dementor

Heya Drak POV

Gods idk why I love that twinning in their brains even if I get frustrated with how dumb those can be.

“At least he knew why it made him uncomfortable; he didn't need alcohol to understand that. That being said, he wasn't angry about it...

Just...plotting whoever she kissed, death.” BRUH🤣

🤣🤣🤣 yeah nah, those two would rather kiss a frog than one another

Yeah those two definitely forgot about that.

How many times they kissed already? I'm counting at least 4.

Oh gods, this internal turmoil.

*the high-pitched squeaks of a shipper*

😭😭😭

SHE WANTS TO KISS YOU, YOU DUMMY

*sad howls*

Welp.

Dude, your luck is rotten.

Even though it was over, I guess not

......... Why do I still think that Eddie also wants to talk with Drakken?

COUSIN FAMILY TIME!

I want to hug and squeeze those 2, seriously.

The Cuz code? Omg they are adorable.

*Finally*

Awww 🥺 Eddie! Worried about Lucre and awww 🥺

Pffff like brother like cousin 🤣 family genes for loving dangerously evil

🤣🤣🤣🤣 OH I SEE ED YOU ARE PULLING BIG GUNS FOR BLACKMAIL

WHICH ISN'T EVEN A LIE

Oh gods, can't wait to read AND HOPE IT'S NOT GONNA TAKE ME FOREVER

Afterthoughts

I want to see Eddie being Dungeon Master in some campaign. Think it'd be interesting spin.

Duff and Monty

Seriously, those 2 have one of the most interesting relationship in this fic. Cus sometimes like our idiots it's so in the open, but sometimes its one of those blink moments. But it veiled so intricately into this fic. It doesn't have to be explicitly said. Which hooks me greatly.

I don't remember if I said it, but I'll say it again.

I guess this is what I appreciate about this fic is how alive the world is around. Even if we get a glimpse through Drakken and Shego eyes, the world is moving. Something always happens without our guys being in the middle of it. It's not just one set of things. Its many. I rarely see that even with big books that surroundings aren't a plot device, but it is its own thing. And I love it so much.

[vacantgodling]

thank you @sergeantnarwhalwrites for tagging me to do this i looooove talking about myself PFF. i’ll leave this as an open tag for anyone else who wants to do it! tag me if u do i wanna hear ur responses 👀

about me

When did you first start writing?

i’ve been writing pretty much my entire life—making stories since i was like 3 with my grandmother and then transitioned to writing them down pretty soon after. i can’t think of a time in my life where i wasn’t story crafting tbh. but i think if you want a “traditional” start time, wherein i started writing anything that could resemble a Proper wip, then that was when i was 12 in 8th grade lol.

Are the genres/themes you enjoy reading different from the ones you write?

nah, they pretty much go hand in hand. i love reading gothic lit nowadays and a lot of my recent wips have sort of dove in that direction. in general, you can tell what was really intriguing me or what i was reading based on the wips i made at the time. vdtrt was super inspired when i was in my percy jackson era, purple haze (started) when i was into more comic/slapstick kid humor (like captain underpants or diary of a wimpy kid or that one journal book with the girl with the purple pen… i can’t remember what it’s called tho), but then transitioned into what it is now when i started getting more into romantic dramas. etc etc.

Is there an author (or just a fellow writer!) you want to emulate, or one to whom you're often compared?

not one that i’m often compared to, but the great gatsby did a number on me beginning to take prose and description seriously. that book is gorgeous to me (prose wise) and i really think between that and the goth/1700-1900s books that i’ve read really influenced me to put more emphasis on prose than on dialogue, tbh. i used to be a more snazzy, ya style writer—and while there’s nothing wrong with that per se it never sparked as much joy as me nailing an overly complex description does nowadays.

in terms of comparing myself or wanting to emulate someone specifically i don’t really. i think my friends are all amazing writers but i’m pretty self centered when it comes to my writing (both positive and negative connotations besides) so i tend to try and focus being the best version of myself and what i’m trying to write. this isn’t to say i don’t get jealous of how some of my friends write occasionally lol. i just don’t particularly want to be like them when the inner demons aren’t being shit, if that makes sense.

Can you tell me a little about your writing space(s)? (Room, coffee shop, desk, etc.)

tbh, a lot of times i write at work. i tend to finish my tasks early and no one tends to bother me so i kind of write to keep myself from falling asleep. i need silence and no distractions to write lol so its easier for me when im there. so its at my work desk and on my work laptop a lot of the time LMAO. when it’s not there i tend to write on my phone when im out and about or on the bus or whatever—same principles of wanting to be by myself and have no one bug me so i can think lol.

What's your most effective way to muster up some muse?

ngl, and this is gonna sound kinda bad, i kinda force myself to. lmao. like when i write at work esp i kinda just decide “what am i gonna work on today” and i sort of do it. it doesn’t always work mind you, like if i’m not in the mood or im tired or distracted or whatever then i’ll just end up doing something else.

when it comes to making new ideas i don’t force those, they just kinda come. i’m always thinking about stories and ideas tbh so it’s a matter of if i get obsessed with an idea enough to make it into an actual thing.

Did the place(s) you grew up in influence the people and places you write about?

nah with 2 caveats. purple haze specifically is a more fictional retelling (split between 2 mcs) of when i was 18-20 years old. lots of details changed but some of the main bits are shit that happened to me then that really fucked me up at the time that i wanted someplace to work through. as i’ve gotten older and healed from things, or taken to poetry to talk about stuff, emphasis on that wip has taken less precedent bc it doesn’t hurt me as much as it used to. secondly, the town braebrooke, where jenna lives in jenna the reaper is actually named after a street name that drivers always get lost going down near where i grew up. but i don’t tend to like to live in reality and real life. it sucks and it’s boring. stories have always been an escape for me so i don’t like to base things on real life if i can avoid it.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing, and if so, do they surprise you at all?

honestly i would say yes, i have recurring themes in my writing but no they don't really surprise me. i tend to write about things that are important to me and because i'm quite introspective i'm acutely aware of the things that i tend to gravitate towards. fucked up/complicated family dynamics where people care about each other (toxically in many ways) but express it horribly, queerness (as a whole, especially when it comes to the masculine), focus on the individual instead of the whole (in most cases) etc... it's all things i think about quite often. stories are just the vehicles to explore it.

my characters

Would you please tell me about your current favorite character?

because i have so many wips it should be "hard" to sit down and say that this (or these) are my favorite characters. but from every single wip i definitely have a brain rot character, and so from my "main wips" the brain rot characters are:

PARAMOUR (tfog) -> hyacinthus shrapnel, obviously. if i had to pick a favorite character of all my ocs its definitely him. he just DOES SOMETHING for me he is literally every obsession i have rolled up into one beautiful, piece of shit.

TCOL -> this one is more difficult because i have a few contendors bc the cast is ENORMOUS and still growing, but clear brightendale will always be my number one frfr. love of my life. my SON. i birthed him, and i'm obsessed with him. he would be followed closely and tied with lath, guardian of valor as well as MIZDARR in terms of other faves tbh.

VDTRT -> darren de leon, also somewhat obviously. he's my favorite guy. what a lad.

BTAF -> sjaak de witte. the first time i truly understood the appeal of a pathetic wet meow meow character archetype because he is all of that and i'm obsessed with him.

Which of your characters do you think you'd be friends with in real life?

conceptualizing being friends with my ocs is weird to me because i hate percieving myself, and i'm kinda weird about friendships. i think i would be actually genuine friends with either the friend group in vdtrt (consisting of: darren, olice, vlad, moonglend, gabe, demi, marco, and awilda) or the friend group in sixteen candles (consisting of: ranger, nanette, vani, roger, and tucker). but overall, i actually don't tend to make ocs with super similar interests to me a lot of the time and bc of the 'ism i have a hard time making friends?? so like take this with a grain of salt. i'd rather observe my ocs and play with them like dolls frfr.

Which of your characters would you dislike the most if you met them?

there are SEVERAL but if i go against the grain and i don't pick overt villainous characters (like tagetes, madja, silvano, etc)... probably the entire cast of btaf in some way or another tbh, like they just make decisions that while i (the creator) understand and think are fun in a "look at this shit" kind of way they would piss me off in a common sense kind of way. they are all dumb.

Tell me about the process of coming up with of one, all, or any of your characters.

characters kind of take a few basic routes for me. either: i like a preexisting character (or am fascinated by them cuz lbr i don't like twilight lmao) and i want to make 'my own version' in which i have control of them or i can amp up/explore other aspects of their personality with free reign bc they're mine now (ie: darren/percy jackson, sjaak/jacob from twilight, kirsi/magda from helix waltz, etc) OR i come up with a plot and i need a character to fill that plot so they start as a utility, then become their own character as i develop them more. (ie: jenna has a crush on someone in school, so i made chloe mathilders and now she has her own personality. the entirety of donut wip existed bc i wanted to make a horror wip and so they kind of came with the stereotypical horror archetypes; juls as the final girl etc).

it's actually not quite often that i have characters appear directly out of the aether for me to just have to deal with. jenna is honestly a rare exception to this because she is the ONE character i can think of who straight up manifested herself. i think that's why her power is manifestation bc she broke the grain of how i usually come up with ocs so. good on you girly lmao.

Do you notice any recurring themes/traits among your characters?

yeah, i definitely have character types i gravitate towards, especially when it comes to characters who are my faves-though i do try my best to make it so all of my characters feel like distinct people, even though i do have 'archetypes' that i fall into with them. off the top of my head i can think of:

beautiful asshole (always masculine) -> hya, toph, dove, ranger, aenlin

masc femmes/adjacent that should break my neck -> nyseah, beki, piper, erecia, azelie, almine

"healing" characters, aka has never done anything wrong in their life ever -> aloe, karenza, vani, iole

resourceful underdog -> kirsi, julissa, darren, dagmar, nevaeh, chidori, noh, n

god just help them -> sjaak, di, clear, quill, prosper, hue, graves

i could go on but yeah like most of my characters can fall into some kind of archetype of some kind

How do you picture them? (As real people you imagined, as models/actors who exist in real life, as imaginary artwork, as artwork you made or commissioned, anime style, etc)

honestly i don't have much of a visual imagination. the ocs that i can picture, i tend to draw out on my own characters so i picture them mostly in a more... stylized and what i wish i could draw version of my own art. otherwise i don't really picture them visually altogether. but this is mostly bc i can't visualize lmao.

my writing

What's your reason for writing?

i love stories, and i love story telling. there isn't really much beyond it. i've been doing it for so long, its literally just the fabric of who i am as a person. my literal first word was book lmao. like i just can't imagine existing without writing or storytelling in some form.

Is there a specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating coming from your readers?

honestly i'm greedy. i want to hear specific reactions and i love when people go into deep depth to react to what i've written and really take in every single detail and then kind of give me a play by play of how they felt and things they liked. it makes me want to write more to get that reaction <3

How do you want to be thought of by those who read your work? (For example: as a literary genius, or as a writer who "gets" the human condition; as a talented worldbuilder, as a role model, etc.)

um. idk if i want to be thought of in a particular way, but i guess i just want my stories to resonate with people. as long as they resonate and i can see how they do/the reaction people have to what i'm written then i'm happy. i think my stories should preceed me, if that makes sense. i don't necessarily need to be remembered for who i am but only for the stories i create. i guess?

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

prose and description

What have you been frequently told your greatest writing strength is by others?

pretty much the same thing. a lot of people tend to like my more poetic and winding prose which makes me happy lol. i've also been told i'm really good at depicting complex emotions.

How do you feel about your own writing? (Answer in whatever way you interpret this question.)

i love it, i think i'm talented asf. shame that the timeline and the state of the publishing industry won't let it be shown to more people but y'know. i would be lying if i said i didn't think that the only real talent i think i have is writing lol

If you were the last person on earth and knew your writing would never be read by another human, would you still write?

YUUUUUP. writing is for me first and everyone else second. i like sharing bc i like validation, but i would be so hype to just be able to create stories on my own with zero interruption. tbh in that scenario i would probably make up so many stories that i would just die eventually bc i forgot to care for myself.

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely what you enjoy? If it's a mix of the two, which holds the most influence?

if i wrote what others enjoyed, i would be publishable. i only write for my own interest.

[your-iron-lung]

HIIIII!!!! I AM VERY EXCITED TO WRITE TO YOU, I HAVE BEEN WANTING TO DO THIS FOR A WHILE BUT I WASN’T SURE, but here I am. Hope you don’t mind. I know you from “Mixed up”, my absolutely favourite zosan fan fiction of all time. After reading everything on ao3 I just wanted to sincerely thank you with my whole heart. I’ve been going through bad shit and you have no idea how much your writing has helped me (even though I have definitely slept less because it was just SO GOOD I always had to “finish at least the chapter” lol). When I found out that you wouldn’t finish it I was a bit sad at first ngl, but when I noticed that you bothered to write some mini-chapters to end it I was the happiest person on this earth. Truthfully, thank you for helping me and keeping me company with your writing (also loves the little art you made about Zoro and Nami, they now proudly hang on my phone as wallpapers) I hope I will get the chance to read other books of yours! Have a nice day!

hello, friend!

sorry it took me a while to get to your message (i dont frequent tumblr very often; youd have better luck checkin in on me on twitter haha)

im so flattered that its your favourite zosan fic? out of all the amazing ones out there?? i put so much into that, and im glad that people, even now, find some kind of meaning in it. im glad it helped you, cause it certainly gave me a good place to be while writing it

i was also pretty sad to make the decision not to finish it- id worked on it for so long, put so much of myself into it, that it felt kind of unfulfilling but sometimes thats how life be

YOU HAVE THE ART ON YOUR PHONE? LOL awwww what the fuck thats so cute, youre too kind

i hope you keep reading my words (whenever i write them........as infrequently as i do)

thank you again for the touching message <3

[ghostbusterscantcatchme]

OKAY IVE WATCHED SOOOO MUCH IT WAS THE FIRST THING I DID WHEN I WOKE UP THIS MORNING (2PM RN) LETS TALK ABOUT IT !!!!

Black Woke Up and fucking punched sean and left him on the ground and sean did not fight back and was so fucking confused and so fucking hurt because i love him so much why is he doing this to me. the way i fucking screamed. cried even . that shit HURT

god i cannot for the life of me remember it all in order but WHATEVER

black and white care about each other soooo much its Beautiful. the one scene where they were hugging and crying and black was like "im not crying tears are just coming out of my eyes . i guess we really are connected" or something along those lines and i was just like suuuuuuure youre not crying lol i Adore them

also i fucking Knew it was todd lmao . bro was wayy too suspicious

poor black though ?? hes been Going Through It. put in the hospital by someone who was meant to be his friend waking up & finding out the girl he loves is sorta with his other friend and his gang doesnt want him around anymore especially after theyve had white (even being directly told by gumpa that whites better than him) plus not having anyone but white in the way of family ?? someone give this guy a mfing hug i swear

plus it turns out grams in love with eugene not black lmao that one threw me for a loop but theyre admittedly cute together :3

THE SCENE WHERE SEAN TOLD DAN TO KILL HIMSELF BC HE KILLED HIS DAD WAS INSANE LMAO . made me laugh im ngl bc i just Knew sean was gonna pull some shit like that i love him so much :/

yok and dan are so fucking adorable im gonna throw up . i seriously love them together and i love their stories and the shit they say and the way their minds work. same for sean & white. like theyre just so crazy insightful sometimes ??? and even when theyre not theyre just . Dude. i Seriously love these characters

i was fucking RELIEVED when sean finally had confirmation that black and white are different people like Yeah the dude you fell in love with would never do All That to you 😭😭

theyre so ajfjksjfjks i love their banter and their interactions and the way they look at each other is so sweet it makes me wanna throw up

plus gumpa bragging about knowing black had a twin the entire time was hilarious lmao id do the same tbh he Deserved to ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ + the scene where sean wraps an arm around white and leans in to kiss his cheek in front of the others and white flinches away and seans like "you dont act like this when its just the two of us" and everyones all like oOoOoOoOoOoH and laughing and teasing them that shit healed my fucking soul man

another thing was the marriage equality fashion show i think it was called ?? + Everything prior to it. queer joy in fiction never fails to get me So Fucking Emotional. everyone with the pride flags and joy of just like Being There and fighting for something they all believe in . imso fucking obsessed

turns out namo was a girl sean hung out with sometimes i guess ? who he seems to sleep with sometimes lmao . and she Liked him and was sad as fuck when she found out about sean and white but she was pretending to be cool about it because "its not like you ever asked me to be your girlfriend" . hmm i wonder if sean woulda said yes if she asked him out pre white

this shit has me in a fucking chokehold if you didnt notice (im pretty sure you did though 😭😭😭) and im in the penultimate episode and im fucking SAD its gonna end soon but im SO looking forward to watching it all again :]

ooooh yes the black and sean confrontation is so painful, poor sean has no freaking clue whats going on.

I adore all of the Black and White scenes together. How the actor makes having a conversation with himself so emotional is amazing. Also love sibling relationships so much so get so many feels from them.

yeah Todd was playing it all from the start, hate him so much. full asshole

Black deserves so many hugs and i'm so glad him and White are reunited. I do feel like him seeing how much more his gang like Whites version of him will probably be a bit of a wake up call. If we get a season 2 I would love to have it focused on Black this time. or even a prequel of sorts that shows the gang before white.

actually was so surprised by Grams thing being with Eugene and not Black, gmmtv really switched up the story there

Sean finally gets an outlet for his anger and hurt and the fact that he tells dan to kill himself instead of taking the revenge says so much about his character and development through the show.

the couples and charachters in this show sometimes feel bigger than that, they’re so real. i was watching the last couple episodes as they were coming out weekly and let me tell you i was thinking about them always (and still am). they’re just so brilliant.

i was actually screaming for them to communicate to Sean what was going on until he finally found out. poor guy was really going through it

ugh the teasing was so relieving, really the fluff we had all been waiting for. and i love Gumpa, he’s the real hero for keeping quiet about White and just accepting that some shit is going on

queer joy is everything and a lot of gmmtv dramas that i’ve watched highlight it. joy and happiness is just so important, especially when you’re showing a lot of the gritty parts of activism

Namo and Sean’s relationship was kinda just there? like it’s kept ambiguous cause both want different things. i really want her to be happy (and they should give her a girlfriend, was really hoping for her and Eugen to have some subplot together)

Endings are the worst. like why does it have to be over and you’ll never be able to watch it the same again. but also it’s really good for rewatches cause then you can find the details and foreshadowing you missed the first time

[love-killed-the-superstar]

Pinch Hitter

Written for @codesecretsanta 2020!!

Hey, @nemesisadraste!! It’s me, your secret santa!! I heard you wanted a slice of samodd so I was ofc 100000% down to clown. Hope you enjoy!!!! It’s a little group chat heavy and I apologise, but there’s some actual prose around the halfway point haha

Can also be read here on AO3!: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28323549

ngl I would actually recommend reading it on ao3 because of formatting hahaha but anyway enjoy!!

Pinch Hitter

DIRECT MESSAGE: Odd Della Robbia

(11:43PM) Odd Della Robbia: SAMMMMMM

(11:45PM) Sam Suarez: yyyyea?

(11:45PM) Odd Della Robbia: XANA ATTACK. NUCLEAR SHIT. COVER FOR US PLSSSS SHOULDNT BE TOO LONG 🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀🙀

(11:46PM) Sam Suarez: sure thing sure thing go save the world n shit 👍👍

(11:46PM) Sam Suarez: was only going to stay up late rewatching good omens anyway

(11:47PM) Odd Della Robbia: hero. incredible woman. love of my life

(11:47PM) Odd Della Robbia: and say hi to you know who for meeeee 😻

(11:48PM) Sam Suarez: crowley is a fictional character odd, he cant hear you

(11:48PM) Odd Della Robbia: but he's so sexy and strong 😻😻😻

(11:48PM) Odd Della Robbia: not as sexy and strong as you, ofc ofc

(11:49PM) Sam Suarez: jesus odd go save the world already and leave me alone

(11:49PM) Odd Della Robbia: SO COLDDDD 🙀🙀🙀

(11:49PM) Odd Della Robbia: still love you tho

(11:49PM) Sam Suarez: still love you too ok NOW GO

…

DIRECT MESSAGE: Jeremie Belpois

(1:24AM) Jeremie Belpois: Samantha?

(1:27AM) Sam Suarez: sup belpois

(1:27AM) Jeremie Belpois: Motion sensor went off. Pretty sure Jim is out and about. Try to buy us some time?

(1:28AM) Sam Suarez: shit alright. i'll see what i can do. b-team already know???

(1:29AM) Jeremie Belpois: They do. The four of you work something out, please? Thanks.

(1:30AM) Sam Suarez: ofc. hey btw hows odd doing??? ok???

(1:30AM) Jeremie Belpois: 80 life points and going strong, Sam.

(1:30AM) Sam Suarez: sweet 👍👍

…

GROUP CHAT: Lyoko B-Team REPRESENT

(1:31AM) Sam Suarez: what's our plan then home slices!!!!!!! 💪😤

(1:32AM) William Dunbar: Still don't know why I'm considered a b teamer but okay 😒

(1:32AM) Sam Suarez: don’t fucking complain william at least you get to be in the main group chat, 🙄🙄

(1:32AM) Elisabeth “Sissi” Delmas: ^^^^^^

(1:33AM) Laura Gauthier: Try getting added, then removed, and still being on the waitlist to rejoin

(1:33AM) Sam Suarez: ouch lol

(1:33AM) Laura Gauthier: ANYWAY, we need a plan of action. Jim’s doing the rounds. Any thoughts?

(1:33AM) William Dunbar: I’ll go stuff Jeremie’s duvet 🙋♂️ Laura you go to Aelita’s, Sam come up with some sort of distraction 👉

(1:33AM) Sam Suarez: hold on WHY DO I GET STUCK WITH THE HARD JOB?? 😠😠

(1:34AM) William Dunbar: to prove yourself, young one. how else do you plan on getting into the lyoko warriors group chat?? 🤷♂️

(1:34AM) Sam Suarez: SHIT U RIGHT… 👀

(1:34AM) Sam Suarez: its my chance… to shine

(1:34AM) Elisabeth “Sissi” Delmas: Why does everyone forget im fucking here?? Give me something to do????? 🙋😤🤦♀️

(1:35AM) William Dunbar: nobody forgot you sissi, shit 🙄 take odd and ulrichs room, if u think u can wrangle kiwi 🥝

(1:35AM) Sam Suarez: i would like it on the record that i did in fact forget about sissi 🙋🙋

(1:35AM) Elisabeth “Sissi” Delmas: FUCK NO. THAT DOG DOES NOT RESPECT ME 😤😤😤😤😤

(1:35AM) Elisabeth “Sissi” Delmas: Also RUDE..

(1:35AM) Sam Suarez: priorities babe or the fucking world ends. your call tho!!!!!! ✌️🤪

(1:36AM) Elisabeth “Sissi” Delmas: ………………. F I N E 🤦♀️

…

GROUP CHAT: Lyoko B-Team REPRESENT

(1:59AM) William Dunbar: @Sam Suarez What did you tell Jim?????? He’s 100% doing head counts now you dumb fuck 🤦♂️

(1:59AM) Sam Suarez: don’t take that tone with me dickbar, he’s looking for a sick GIRL. if you stuffed the fucking duvets properly we won’t have a problem, he’ll only be peeking into rooms anyway 😠😠

(2:00AM) Laura Gauthier: And what do you suppose happens when he finds NOBODY and comes to the conclusion that you lied to him? You have to think these things through, Sam, Jeremie’s not planning on doing any return trips if he can help it.

(2:00AM) Sam Suarez: yall are jerks, YOU put me up to the task of cooking up an excuse, don’t complain that it was shit!!!! geez!!!!

(2:00AM) Elisabeth “Sissi” Delmas: God you’re all useless. I can fake-cry, I took a drama workshop over summer. I’ll take the hit but you OWE ME. 😤

(2:01AM) Sam Suarez: there are no favours in this sissi, we took an oath. we are heroes of justice now and you don’t get compensation for saving the world, its superhero 101

(2:01AM) Elisabeth “Sissi” Delmas: Shut up Sam, you’re buying me dinner tomorrow. Take me somewhere nice 💅🙆😘

(2:01AM) Sam Suarez: but i don’t date girls who only save the world to reap the benefits, this simply won’t work out 😔😔

(2:01AM) William Dunbar: Take your flirting to private message, I don't want to be implicated in this sordid affair if Odd finds out

(2:01AM) Sam Suarez: ahahahahahahaahahahaha we got a funny man over here

(2:02AM) William Dunbar: Lololol

(2:02AM) Laura Gauthier: SHUT UP ALL OF YOU.

(2:02AM) Laura Gauthier: I can hear Jim coming, play it cool

(2:02AM) William Dunbar: Hahahaaha good luck 😂😂

(2:07AM) William Dunbar: You all alive……………..? 👀

(2:07AM) Sam Suarez: we sure are, listen to this

(2:07AM) Sam Suarez: sissi fake cried, told Jim she was having the worst cramps of her life and started listing off the side effects of the birth control she’s on. It was the greatest thing ive ever heard and im absolutely buying her dinner tomorrow, and yes it will be candle-lit 🍽️🍷💍

(2:07AM) William Dunbar: Holy shit. 👀 My deepest respect. 🙏 I will put in a good word with Master Belpois Himself, she deserves a seat at the grown ups table for this 🤷♂️

(2:07AM) Sam Suarez: no doubt no doubt

(2:08AM) Laura Gauthier: That was a close one. Sissi’s methods are unorthodox but hey, it worked. Next time find an excuse that doesn’t create more work for us, all right, Sam?

(2:08AM) Sam Suarez: shit you’re ungrateful as fuck. Damn . 🙄🙄

(2:08AM) Laura Gauthier: I’M JUST SAYING

(2:08AM) William Dunbar: Come on, lets not fight, I’m too tired for this shit 😴

(2:09AM) Sam Suarez: so go to bed, dumbass

…

DIRECT MESSAGE: Odd Della Robbia

(2:59AM) Odd Della Robbia: guess who just got DEVIRTUALISED!!!! 😹😹🔫🔫

(3:02AM) Sam Suarez: oh no, poor baby, you were doing so well

(3:03AM) Odd Della Robbia: right????? fucking megatanks, im telling you, they suck so much 😿

(3:03AM) Sam Suarez: well, if you’re out of points now, come by my room and we can play animal crossing together

(3:04AM) Odd Della Robbia: would that i could, sam, would that i could

(3:04AM) Odd Della Robbia: but theres a fucking building contractor lurking somewhere in the factory, xana-possessed, trying to take me the fuck OUT 🙀🙀🙀

(3:04AM) Sam Suarez: just tell him you’re not interested????? Its what i told sissi earlier

(3:05AM) Odd Della Robbia: ahahahahahahahaha

(3:05AM) Odd Della Robbia: first of all, WOW WE GOT A FUNNYMAN OVER HERE

(3:05AM) Sam Suarez: lololol

(3:05AM) Odd Della Robbia: second of all, i demand to hear that story as soon as i get back. Nobody turns sissi down and gets away with it 👀

(3:06AM) Sam Suarez: well, i cant help it

(3:06AM) Sam Suarez: my heart… belongs to another… a mr odd della robbia… im in the throes… of love… 💓💓

(3:06AM) Odd Della Robbia: OH!!! SAM!!!!!!! 😻😻😻💓💓💓

(3:06AM) Odd Della Robbia: luv u. So much

(3:06AM) Sam Suarez: same same lololol

(3:07AM) Odd Della Robbia: when i get back we ca

(3:07AM) Sam Suarez: ????

(3:07AM) Sam Suarez: odd????

(3:07AM) Sam Suarez: come in, funny man????

message failed

(3:08AM) Sam Suarez: odd if you die i will be so mad

message failed

…

DIRECT MESSAGE: Ulrich Stern

(3:10AM) Ulrich Stern: Hey Sam, it’s Ulrich

(3:10AM) Ulrich Stern: Einstein has another favour to ask

(3:11AM) Sam Suarez: first of all you dont have to tell me its you, the app TELLS me whos messaging me, this isnt a text

(3:11AM) Sam Suarez: second, tell me my boyfriend isn’t getting fucking murdered by a building contractor 😠😠

(3:11AM) Ulrich Stern: Huh???

(3:11AM) Ulrich Stern: Oh yeah. He’s holding his own but there’s not much time. You need to go keep watch outside Jeremie’s door while Laura transfers some files. If we get busted and she can’t complete the file transfer… well. The world does actually depend on it, so. Yeah

(3:11AM) Sam Suarez: isnt william the better option anyway?? Isnt he only like 3 doors down from you 🙄

(3:12AM) Ulrich Stern: He’s not answering. Probably asleep already, he’s a dumbass. Please, you’re our only option, Sissi isn’t answering either

(3:12AM) Sam Suarez: oh theres a GREAT story behind that but i’ll let her tell it tomorrow

(3:13AM) Sam Suarez: and fine, but seriously is odd okay?? If this dude is more than 5’5 he’ll have a problem taking him down, you know how scrawny he is

(3:13AM) Ulrich Stern: He’s tougher than you think, Sam. Trust me on that one.

(3:14AM) Ulrich Stern: (Also I am about to go save him from getting his ass beat)

(3:14AM) Sam Suarez: all right all right

(3:15AM) Sam Suarez: but hey stern, when this has all blown over, we’re having a serious talk about promoting me to the big leagues

(3:16AM) Ulrich Stern: ...Big leagues?

(3:16AM) Sam Suarez: im talking main group chat, my guy. MAIN. GROUP CHAT. 👏👏

…

DIRECT MESSAGE: Odd Della Robbia

(3:30AM) Odd Della Robbia: im coming mi amore… i beat up a fully grown man with my bare fists… pushed him down some stairs… it was amazing 😼💯

(3:31AM) Sam Suarez: please say you didnt break any bones, belpois isnt planning on reversing time right???

(3:31AM) Sam Suarez: like even if was going to kill u he was only possessed by xana

(3:32AM) Odd Della Robbia: heh i broke nothing!! Im a hero of justice after all 💪😼

(3:32AM) Odd Della Robbia: ulrich may have given him some bruises tho 😹

(3:32AM) Sam Suarez: ehh i’ll take that over this guy waking up with fucked up limbs and shit

(3:32AM) Odd Della Robbia: no doubt no doubt

(3:33AM) Odd Della Robbia: …

(3:33AM) Odd Della Robbia: anyway, night sam 💞

(3:33AM) Sam Suarez: oh, ok 🙄

(3:33AM) Sam Suarez: night, stupid. love you ❤️

…

Despite his parting message, Odd shows up anyway.

He slinks into her dorm room as it draws to 4:00AM, half-heartedly kicking off his shoes at the door and closing it with a softness that’s surprising given how exhausted he looks; almost as though it is second nature at this point to keep quiet, avoid drawing more attention. Her boyfriend is a professional, after all, when it comes to saving the world on the down-low.

Samantha watches Odd from her desk, where she is sat up browsing Twitter and waiting for the inevitable ‘we need you to do something else before the night is through’ messages from Jeremie. She’s been listening to the same Jay Som song on loop for over an hour now, and it leaks quietly from her laptop speakers, a strange extra layer of ambiance to the puzzle that is the hour before birdsong begins. A Baymax-patterned blanket is thrown around her shoulders for warmth, and there’s an empty can of energy drink within arms reach.

“Wrong room,” she says in a low voice, expecting him to jump anyway; he doesn’t. Instead he squints at her in the dim light, leaning back against the door with a weary sigh. “Didn’t think you were coming.”

“Wasn’t, but… here I am.”

He doesn’t really elaborate further than that.

“Ulrich know you came this way?”

“He stayed behind to talk things over with Jeremie. The overbike got fucked up in Lyoko and they’re gonna upgrade it or something. Jer-bear needed to know the specifics about his experience driving it so they can do some fine-tuning, I think. Y’know, so he doesn’t drift too far and plunge into the digital sea. Shit can get real bad, real fast.”

“I’ll bet. So, you triumphed over evil tonight?” she guesses, shutting her laptop lid and rising to her feet. Her blanket trails behind her as she does. “XANA can’t attempt to destroy the world for another 24 hours?”

“You know it,” he says, yawning. “And now, it’s bedtime.”

Thank fuck they don’t have classes tomorrow. She’ll happily lie in til noon with Odd, catching up on these lost hours.

Sam steps over her skateboard and some laundry she kicked aside earlier, a little embarrassed that her floor is so messy, but she knows Odd is too tired to even comprehend the state of her room right now. As it is, he’s swaying a little while standing, stifling a yawn against his hand - it’s only a matter of time til he crashes.

“All right, guess you’re here to stay. Hop in.”

“Did you know? You’re a goddess. An angel. A truly spectacular woman among women,” he mumbles.

“Flattery won’t give me back the hours of sleep I lost sending Jim on that wild goose chase earlier,” Sam muses, wiggling under her covers, still bundled up in the blanket like a crepe. She doesn’t know the full story, nor does she imagine she’ll get it until tomorrow when the group meet up for lunch - something about XANA threatening to blow up a reactor on some nearby building site, creating some devastating damage to the local area - but at this point she’s too tired to listen and Odd is too tired to explain.

Odd flops down on the bed beside her.

“Thank you for helping us out,” he sighs, too tired to even look at her. His limbs are all floppy. If she nudged him off the edge of the bed now, he’d probably just fold up like a pair of pants and stay there til morning. “What did you do, exactly?”

“Told him I heard someone crying in the bathroom and thought maybe someone was unwell,” she says with a shrug. “Jim checked the girls bathroom and did room checks, which gave me, William and Laura some time to sneak into your respective rooms and act as extra head counts. Just being under the covers was enough, I don’t think he was doing anything more than cursory peeking into rooms with a tiny flashlight. Wasn’t the most innovative red herring to give him, but it did the trick.”

“If it keeps them off our backs, the creativity isn’t worth factoring in,” Odd murmurs, tugging off his jeans and chucking them at the wall opposite. The impact scuffs the wall slightly, but Sam doesn’t care. Delmas doesn’t give them shit about damages to the room unless it makes the room completely uninhabitable anyway, which is why there’s a literal hole in her wall through to the room next door that she’s had to artfully cover with a Front Bottoms poster.

“Anyway, Sissi distracted him. I’ll let her tell the story herself, it was fucking hilarious. Then Ulrich messaged to say he needed me to keep watch while Laura sent over some files from the computer in Jeremie’s room to the supercomputer, which - I mean, in this day and age, why the fuck doesn’t he keep everything on the cloud anyway? So I was stuck doing that, because apparently, William had already fallen asleep again, the fucking lug. Can you believe that? You’d think, being your Lyoko pinch hitter and all, he’d be better at staying awake.”

“Oh, I can believe it,” Odd drawls, tugging off his shirt and balling it up, sending it to land atop his crumpled jeans with a flourish. He rubs his eyes and peers around. “Got that old shirt for me to sleep in?”

Rolling her eyes fondly, Sam reluctantly peels back the bedsheets once more and pads over to her wardrobe, pulling it open and sifting through until she finds what she’s looking for; an old Hootie & The Blowfish T-shirt, handed down to her by one of her older brothers. It always hangs right off of her, so on Odd’s scrawny frame, it’s basically an Ebenezer Scrooge nightgown.

“Here.” She tosses it over to him and he wriggles into it happily. “You might as well keep it, these days you wear it more than me.”

“If I walked around in a band shirt that hangs off me like a smock I’d never hear the end of it from Ulrich,” he says with a laugh, flopping back against the covers and sighing deeply. “He makes fun of my little chicken legs enough as it is.”

“Well, I love your little chicken legs, so he can keep his opinions to himself.”

She slides into bed beside him and he’s cold to touch; the freezing factory, coupled with walking back in the chilly night air, must have really done a number on him. He snuggles against her happily, mumbling, “Can I warm my feet on you?”

“Will you respect my wishes if I say no?” she retorts. He grins as she sends him a knowing look, before placing his feet, two tiny, stinky blocks of ice, against her shins. They both pull the covers up over their noses, staring at the ceiling in dazed silence for a few moments, before she adds, “He won’t miss you when you get back?”

“Not likely, I don’t fucking spoon him to sleep, Sam,” he snorts. “He’ll be too tired to care where the fuck I’ve snuck off to, and he can handle anything Kiwi throws his way, so it’s fine. I’m sure he’s capable of connecting the dots.”

“Fine, shithead, I’ll drop it.”

She continues to stare up at the ceiling, but she can feel his keen gaze on her, and rolls over to face him. He watches her carefully.

“Are you mad at me?”

“What? No.”

“Even though it’s nearly four in the morning and you spent the whole night covering for us?”

“It’s what happens when you agree to saving the world, isn’t it?” she points out. Sam’s eyes adjust to the darkness, and she notices for the first time that there’s the beginnings of bruises around his neck. She reaches up to trace them with her fingers, and he instinctively wriggles away. Her breath catches in her throat. “…XANA did this to you?”

“Actually, it was a building contractor,” he corrects. “He started to choke me, but then Ulrich got him in a headlock and next thing you know… we pushed him down some stairs.”

“It must have been scary,” she mutters. At that, his face melts into a smile, and he prods at her face.

“You’re so serious! Sam, trust me, this happens all the time. I’m indestructible, so it’s fine.”

“How else am I supposed to react, huh? My boyfriend comes home with strangulation marks on his neck and you want me to be all cavalier about it…”

“Because I’m used to it.” Odd pauses. “Well, not strangulation in particular, but getting hurt on the job is kinda everyday stuff.”

Sam scowls. “You're not supposed to pretend like this is normal, Odd.”

“What, you want me to cry and be vulnerable on you?”

“No.”

“You do.”

“Okay, fine, I do! What about it?!” She fixes him with a stern look. “You have to be careful! What’s the point in me staying awake and making distractions and shit if you’re just going to fucking die at the end of it, huh?”

“I’m not going to die.” He cups her face in his hands and fixes her with his own stern look. “Look. I know you haven’t been doing this long, but this happens, okay? Not always, but it does. I mean, you remember the kind of fights you used to pick with me when I would come over with these bruises without telling you why.”

She thinks back to the months leading up to him finally telling her the truth. How scared and hurt she felt, seeing him with these cuts and scrapes, bruises, occasionally even a sprain. She’d gone through all the possibilities in her head - bullying, hate crimes, mugging even. Still, he refused to budge, until one day he just… stopped pretending it was all some big coincidence.

“It was scarier not knowing,” she decides. “At least this way I know what you’re up against, but… I don’t know.”

He leans forward and kisses her on the nose. “I promise you I’m fine. But look, part of being a Lyoko pinch hitter is knowing things get hairy sometimes. I’m gonna get hurt from time to time but if I don’t, the whole world explodes. Or, okay, maybe not literally , most of the time, but I’m like, a drop in the bucket.”

“Well, you’re a drop in the bucket who matters to me,” she reinforces. Staring into his eyes, she can feel her body relax slightly. “Look, I’ll drop it. I’m just glad you’re okay.”

“Good. Now, can we please sleep? I am so tired, I’m starting to forget who I am. You’re about to encounter Grinch Odd, and he’s no fun whatsoever.”

“Oh, is he the one who said my face looked like a beet that one time?” she wonders, raising her eyebrows at him. He groans and pushes her away, covering his face with his hands.

“How many times do I have to tell you XANA fucked with my speech?” he grumbles. “Completely scrambled my words. I was going for beautiful.”

“Sure, sure. When in doubt, blame it on XANA?”

“I mean it! I would never call you a beet! A potato, maybe…”

She shoves him and he both winces and laughs. “Oof, that guy did a number on me.”

“Yeah, well, I’ll beat him up for you then.”

“You’re going to beat up XANA?”

“Sure, how hard could it be? I’ll just like, reach into the supercomputer with my full fist-”

They both burst out laughing and fall back against the pillows.

Once it trickles out, she blinks sleepily at the ceiling.

“I never really thought about how long you guys have been going without us, though.”

Odd quirks an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“Us. The B-Team, the Pinch Hitters. The Lyoko Warriors’ freaking PR Team! Without someone pulling the strings you must have run into all sorts of trouble, right?”

“Oh, yeah,” Odd laughs. “We used to have the authorities trying to invade the factory. Almost got expelled by Delmas. I almost got sent to a psych ward before, that was fun.”

“Jesus, Odd. Why did it take you so long to introduce other people to the fray?”

He shrugs. “No clue, really. One day we just kinda realised… sometimes it’s better to have people around. No man is an island. That can apply to groups too, I guess.”

“And why would you trust me?” Sam presses on, arms folded over her chest. “Sure, I’m your girlfriend, but I’ve hurt you before. I mean really fucked you over. That whole thing with William…”

“You had no way of knowing,” he says firmly. “It was stupid and immature, sure, but how could you have known?”

She shrugs. “I’ve just been thinking about it, I guess.”

They both lapse into silence, but beneath the covers, Odd reaches for her hand.

“I trust you because I trust you,” he says eventually. “And because if we need some big Lyoko Warriors PR Team, I’d want you at the helm. Who else is going to keep William from swaggering off the side of the planet? He can be kinda self-absorbed.”

“Sissi,” Sam deadpans.

“And who else is going to keep Sissi from turning every XANA distraction into a fucking performative art piece?”

“...Okay, fair.”

“By the way, you still taking her out to dinner tomorrow?”

“Apparently. You should tag along as my date.”

He laughs. “No way, I’m no third wheel.”

Sam leans forward and kisses him gently, before muttering, “By the way, I told Ulrich to get me in the main group chat. Think he’ll do it?”

“Absolutely not,” Odd says cheerfully, kissing her back. “But nice try. Here’s to next time.”

…

GROUP CHAT: Into The Lyokoverse

(9:48AM) Jeremie Belpois added Sam Suarez to Into The Lyokoverse.

(9:48AM) Jeremie Belpois: @Everyone Look who decided to show up!

(9:52AM) Yumi Ishiyama: Oh Hi Sam

(9:59AM) Aelita Schaeffer: hey, look who made it to the big leagues!!

(10:10AM) Odd Della Robbia: SAMMMMMMMMM !!!!!!!!!!

(10:12AM) Sam Suarez: !!!!!!!!

[twinkletoes-rp]

6, 7, 19, 20, 30, 31, 32, 39, 40, 41, 43, 44, 45, 51 (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧

Fanfiction Questions meme

6. List your OTP from each fandom you’ve been involved in.

Oh, geez... I’ve been involved in so many fandoms, LOL. I don’t really know if I can/should name them all. I’ll give you the ones (ONLY OTPs - doesn’t mean I don’t ship other things, too) I can think of off the top of my head.

Kiba/Hinata (Naruto), Fakir/Ahiru (Princess Tutu), Stiles/Derek (Teen Wolf), Kirito/Lisbeth (Sword Art Online), Harry/Hermione (Harry Potter), Goku/Bulma (Dragon Ball), Yusuke/Botan (Yu Yu Hakusho), Todoroki/Izuku (BNHA), (better!)Bakugo/Uraraka (BNHA), Toph/Aang (ATLA), and Adrien/Marinette (Miraculous Ladybug)!

7. List your NoTPs from each fandom you’ve been in.

(This isn’t meant to be hate on the ships I name! I just don’t ship them, that’s all! Ship and let ship! ;))

Naruto/Sasuke (Naruto), Kirito/Asuna (Sword Art Online), Ron/Hermione (Harry Potter), Harry/Ginny (Harry Potter), Goku/Chichi (Dragon Ball), Yusuke/Keiko (Yu Yu Hakusho), Bakugo/Izuku (BNHA), and Aang/Katara (ATLA).

19. Is there a ship (in your current fandom) which you wished you could get behind, but you just don’t feel them?

I’m not sure I have a ‘current fandom’ since I live for, like, everything at once, but maybe technically Naruto would be it?

In that case (again, no offense to anyone - and removing the ‘I wish I could get behind’ part ‘cause I do not), NaruSasu. I just...don’t get it? At all? Maybe it’s the ‘what could have been’s or whatever, but when you just take the series at face value, that relationship is...really icky, at least to me, and that’s putting it lightly. It’s so damn unhealthy, especially for poor Naruto. They were never even friends, Sasuke always treated him like shit, and yet...?! *throws hands at half+ of OG series and virtually all of Shippuden* IDK, man. Something’s weird there, and I don’t like it. Can’t support that. Naruto deserves better, damn it. (*casually links her Naruto AU fic where he DOES get better (in more ways than one), TYVM*)

20. Any ships (in your current fandom) which you surprised yourself by liking?

Going with Naruto again, so. Hmm... I guess maybe Kankuro/Tenten? I didn’t even know that was a ship until a friend showed me a really good fic, and I was hooked! lol.

Another might be KakaObi, but only in AUs where Obito survives the cave in and gets out with Kakashi and Rin and recovers, continuing to be the sweetheart he is instead of the ass he turned out to be in canon. Because he, too, deserved better, damn it!

Another is one I might have made up, not sure (mostly in the context of my Naruto AU, NGL), lol: Karin/Shikamaru! It makes sense and there are lots of compelling reasons when you break it down! You know, 'cause Shikamaru would need (or probs at least prefer) someone on his smarts level, and she's a genius, too, just in a different way. And once she mellows out, Karin's really cool, and (in my AU) she grows to eventually adore Naruto (actually fights to defend/protect him in the Pein arc!), and anyone who loves Naruto is good in Shikamaru's book! lol. Plus, she can tell him when he has his genius brain twisted in too many directions, tell him he's being an idiot and help him figure things out in her different way. lol. IDK, I like it!

30. What inspires you to write?

I just...love writing?? I’ve wanted to be an author since I was 8-9 years old, started writing when I was 11, and I’ve been writing ever since! I’m 27 now! I’ve had a few dry spells, ofc, but I always end up coming back! I just feel like writing is in my blood (partly because, I like to joke, my last name is the title of one of Shakespeare’s plays, haha)!

Pretty much anything can inspire me to write, though. I’ll see a pretty flower and be like “OOH, that flower could feature perfectly in this chapter in this way!” and then write 1k about that! lol. Or I could read a review of one of my new chapters and end up thinking of something I’d never considered before and then write almost 3k on that alone (looking at you, middle section of Ch 6 of my Naruto AU, lol)!

Basically, if it sparks joy, I’m gonna write something! X’D

31. What’s the nicest thing someone has ever said about your writing?

Nicest?? Hmm... I mean, I’ve had a lot of things said about my writing... Not sure I can really narrow it down? lol.

I guess the nicest things I’ve ever been told are when I make people cry (espec multiple times!) and actually feel the emotions the characters are feeling, that the characters and their development feel so real that it’s like they’re real people instead of fictional/they’re written so much better than the creator himself wrote them. (Been getting those a lot on my Naruto AU, actually. lol.)

32. Do you listen to music when you write or does music inspire you? If so, which band or genre of music does it for you?

I tend to prefer silence while I write, but sometimes, my house is loud and people keep breaking my concentration (house of 5, lots of animals, not the quietest, lol), I sometimes listen to music. I usually prefer instrumental, and then usually Naruto or Wolf’s Rain (sometimes Princess Tutu, too) instrumental tracks. The Naruto one I like best also has rain sounds mixed in, which is great because I love the sound of rain! Woo! (Here’s a link to that one if anyone else wants in on this! ;))

39. What is your greatest strength as a writer?

Emotions and getting into the nitty-gritty stuff therein. As an extremely visual, emotional writer, I’ve always been able to feel the emotions of the characters pretty much exactly how they’re feeling it in the moment and then put it on paper. I also make people cry a lot with my writing and get them to feel what the characters do, so that’s awesome! It’s always my goal to get my readers to feel things because then I feel like they’ve really connected with the story and characters I’ve written!

40. What do you struggle the most with in your writing?

Transitions are dicks. Sometimes I struggle ‘cause it’s been, like, two seconds or five hours, and I don’t know how to show that, lol. If I can, espec with the last one, I just fade to black. lol.

Also, sometimes I feel like I use the same sentence structure a lot, mostly the ‘..., but...’ format (at least lately). It’s really annoying, and I worry my readers notice and get annoyed/think I suck because of it. lol.

41. List and link to 5 fanfics you are currently reading:

“All the ways I say ‘I love you’” by Leonardo_Charles_BlueWood_21 (Fandom: Ninjago)

“Paradise Lost” by AnchoredTether (Fandom: Voltron Legendary Defender (Zootopia-esque dark AU))

“where my armor ends” by dalniente (Fandom: She-Ra Princesses of Power)

“of cats and curses” by faerialchemist (Fandom: She-Ra Princesses of Power x Fruits Basket crossover)

“Mischief is its Own Reward” by dalniente (Fandom: Megamind)

43. Is there anyone in your fandom who really inspires you?

I don’t really read Naruto fanfic too much anymore, so like...I guess, technically, another main fandom of mine right now is Fruits Basket, so: without a doubt, @kyosohmastan ! They’re my absolute favorite Fruits Basket fanfic author! Everyone’s so in character, the writing is so sweet and feelsy, steamy when it needs to be, and I really love the writing itself - it’s just so well done and beautiful and I die happily when they post a new fic or chapter? Ahhh! Plus, they’re just so nice and talented in so many ways, we have the same opinions on certain things (like Kakeru Manabe is Too Much(TM) for us, haha, no offense to those who like him! lol.), and I just really, really feel blessed to know and read their fics! Love them so! <3

44. What ship do you feel needs more attention?

I’m not sure which ship this is talking about? Hmm... But a ship I definitely think (have always thought) needs more attention is Kirito/Lisbeth from Sword Art Online! It’s so slept on, and that is a damn fucking shame because they’re so healthy and sweet and have so much more amazing potential than they’re given credit for (way freaking more than the actual canon couple, just sayin’, no offense to anyone who likes the pairing)! I have written a good few metas (and a fanfic) on the subject (some/most of which are on my Lisbeth RP blog, actually, lol)! If anyone wants to discuss/RP/anything involving this ship, please let me know! Would love it!

45. What is your all time favourite fanfic?

I’m not sure I have a favorite fic. But one that I always come back to (all of her (mostly G1) My Little Pony fics, actually - first found them when I was, like, 12, and have kept rereading over and over through the years, haha) is A Mother in Her Eyes by LoveLikeElena on FFN. It takes place in the author’s own MLP universe, but I love said universe so much, and her takes on the characters are amazing and so sweet! I love her look at the serious subjects that follow the characters through her ongong MLP series! <3

51. Rant or Gush about one thing you love or hate in the world of fanfiction! Go!

Fanfic readers have become really, really lazy. No one reviews anymore, maybe leave a kudos here and there if you’re lucky (I have a major love-hate (more hate) relationship with kudos...), and it’s so, so, so discouraging to us writers! I wish they knew how it felt, to be honest, espec the ones you know are reading, but just...don’t comment. It’s ridiculously disheartening to work so hard on something for days, weeks, even months or years on something, only to get basically nothing in return. It’s like posting into the void, and it sucks ass. It’s part of what made me quit writing for a good few years, actually, and I’m so sad to see that it’s still a thing. I comment on everything I read because I know how it feels and how much it hurt! It hurts like hell, especially because I remember how it used to be just 6-8 years ago when everyone commented! I desperately pray the fanfic/content consuming world fixes that really soon or we might lose some really amazing writers! Please, even an emoji or keyboard smash! I don’t care, I’ll take anything (and I know I’m not the only one)! <3

[phonaesthemes]

a list of asks

@padawanyugi tagged me in this, but Tumblr decided to eat any notification that I got tagged, so I’m glad I saw it on my dash because I like filling these things out. Thanks for tagging me! I may have typed A Lot.

Favorites: What types of books do you enjoy? Tell about what you’ve read recently (Or maybe about a book you hated recently!)I like spec-fic and sci-fi, although less “hard” science fiction, and I also enjoy fantasy. I read a lot of YA even though I’m in my 30s just because it seems easy to find a story I want to read and I’m not usually in the mood for dense prose.

I’ve been rereading the Wheel of Time series since it’s getting an Amazon TV show; it was my first non-LOTR fantasy series and I love it to death, warts and all, although I love joking about the weak points with other people who’ve read it. I think the last other thing I read was A Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue, which was a queer YA historical fiction, and it was a lot of fun. I wish I’d had access to all these queer stories when I was an actual teenager, but better late than never.

What types of music do you like to listen to? Share five songs from your music library. I really do like a bit of everything, although I gravitate towards certain genres more often depending on the season or time of day, so I’m going to cheat and pick 5 per season. Summer for me is lots of peppy pop (pride playlists!), punk and rock and punk-adjacent stuff, just upbeat stuff in general. -Weekender, by The Royal They -Break My Heart, by Dua Lipa -Toutes les femmes savent danser, by Loud -Ruby Soho, by Rancid -Womanarchist, by Bad Cop, Bad Cop

In the fall, my inner goth kid craves darkwave, goth rock, dramatic folk, roots rock, and also anything that reminds me of Halloween. -Iuka, by the Secret Sisters -Bela Lugosi’s Dead, by Bauhaus -How’s It Gonna End, by Tom Waits -Under the Milky Way, by The Church -I Put a Spell on You, by Screamin’ Jay Hawkins I could go on about the Christmas music I like at length (Boney M’s Christmas album slaps, ngl) but I’ll just skip that and say that I listen to more classical and piano pieces in the winter. I’m terrible at remembering names, so artists only: -Ludovico Einaudi -Chopin -Debussy -Saint-Saëns -Dvořák And in spring I’m usually just depressed af and listen to whatever. -FML, by K.Flay -Weird Part of the Night, by Louis Cole -Juodaan Viinaa, by Korpiklaani -P.O.H.U.I., by Carla’s Dreams -Marryuna, by Baker Boy

Do you have a show or movie that you can just put on anytime and it’s your comfort? Definitely Star Trek. I’ve rewatched the various iterations (except TOS) so many times. Also Mean Girls and Bring It On, idk why.

Do you have a favorite dessert? Tiramisu or creme brulée! Or macarons. I don’t eat dessert really unless I’m at a restaurant.

Do you have a favorite cold drink? Sparkling water, hands down.

Do you have a favorite game? The hours I have put into the SIms in my lifetime is probably shameful, although I haven’t played in a while. Don’t Starve is another contender for hours played, but I am also really fond everything by Amanita Design

Do you have a favorite part of your self care/beauty/health routine? I haven’t been doing it much lately since I’ve been dealing with some uncertain health issues with my joints (actually have a rheumatologist appointment later today), but savasana after a long yoga workout is borderline ecstasy.

Do you have a favorite type of take-out food? Indian for sure.

What’s your favorite type of exercise/physical activity? I have a love-hate relationship with running. I don’t actually love it but I love how I feel after. I really enjoy yoga. I love playing in the water at the beach, bodyboarding and swimming.

Pick between: (you choose the context)

Cook or bake? (I love cooking A Lot)

Space or ocean? (Hard to pick, but I grew up by the ocean and it’s 100% my happy place)

Chocolate or vanilla?

City or suburb or rural? (I grew up in an isolated rural village and I miss the quiet and the slower pace of life, but I do not miss the lack of amenities and opportunities, or the smalltown gossip. I also don’t drive bc of epilepsy, so I’m fucked as far as transport in rural settings.)

Past or future?

Shower in the morning or evening?

Mac/Apple or PC/Android? (Linux in general!)

Sing or dance?  (I don’t have an amazing voice but I can carry a tune without it being painful, and I love singing along with songs.)

Get up early or sleep in? (I actually love sleeping in but with two kids, early morning is my only time to myself, so I wake up before 6 most days AGGH.)

Shoes, socks, or bare feet? (Hate socks. I’m barefoot at home all year round.)

Marker, crayon, or pencil? Pen!

Tea, coffee, or hot chocolate? (Coffee in the morning, tea later on.)

Random questions:

Have you ever had any pets? (Had dogs and a cat as a kid, and as an adult I’ve had betta fish and cats, and I have a cat currently.)

What is your academic background/job field? I did my undergrad in linguistics, and I am currently a stay-at-home dad lol. I do freelance editing and transcription on the side. I don’t think I’ll ever work in my field bc I really don’t have the energy to go to grad school.

What’s something random that you’re into (even if you aren’t good at it)? I signed up for a Cape Breton step dancing class in university and I loved it.

Are you good at putting away your clean laundry right away? It depends on the day, but generally yes. Mine and everyone else’s. When I lived alone? Absolutely not.

What’s one of your pet peeves? Someone trying to have a conversation with me when they have the radio or TV on. I can’t follow what you’re saying if someone else is speaking! I hate having that stuff on as background noise in general.

What’s something you’re pretty good at? I’m a great cook.

What’s the most recent nice thing you bought for yourself? A new conditioner ig? lol

Can you sew? I can mend a small tear or sew on a button, but it’s been years since I did more than that.

What’s a chore you hate (or a chore you enjoy)? I hate vacuuming so much. So much. Maybe if I had a better vaccuum cleaner I wouldn’t mind it, but I just feel like I’m fighting with the stupid thing, getting caught up on its own cords, caught on furniture, can’t quiiiite reach a spot... HATE IT. I like shoveling snow sometimes, though.

Tell us a fun fact about yourself. I am 20 years older than my youngest sibling, and five minutes younger than my “oldest” sibling.

Never have I ever... Gone fishing, even though I’m from a fishing community.

What extracurriculars did/do you do in school? In high school, I played trumpet in band until the band got dissolved from lack of funding. I played soccer one year, was in a play another year. We had an art club for like a semester that I was in. In university the first time round, I did step dancing and intramural hide and seek  Second time around, I was in the linguistics club to help with assignments. (We were very much encouraged to work in pairs or groups for a lot of different classes. The only thing was that you did need to list your group members on the assignment so the prof knew who you worked with. My first morphology class in particular, we had a whole homework club where a huge portion of the class got together to work through assignments and help each other understand, and the prof would quite often show up. </tangent>

Deeper questions:

How’s your quarantine/last few months been? The cabin fever was really bad before the weather warmed up. I struggle with seasonal depression every spring, and it’s gotten much worse since we moved to Edmonton because of how long the winters are. (Snow from September to May/June? Fucccck.) It’s frankly horrifying to look at what’s going on in the US, but even though we have far fewer cases here, I’m really anxious that we’ll see another wave soon. Otherwise, I think I’ve adjusted. Home-schooling, hand-sanitizing, social distancing, masks...All feels kind of normal now, which should maybe concern me.

What do you think of human nature/society/etc.? I am like the least philosophical person you will meet so I don’t think I really have many thoughts.

What’s something you are insecure about? Writing my L2 if a native speaker is gonna read it.

What do you think is the meaning of life/reason that humans exist in the universe? I don’t think there is one, and that doesn’t bother me.

Do you think you’re better (whatever that means to you) than you used to be? Definitely. My adolescence and early adulthood was rough. I was dealing with a lot of trauma, untreated bipolar disorder, and I self-harmed for a very long time. I could not imagine making it to 30, let alone being stable and happy. I actively avoided thinking about the future because it made me spiral. But I was lucky enough to get help, consistent help from a doctor I clicked with, and it made a world of difference. I think younger me would be disappointed at how mundane my life is, but I’m thrilled to be boring because boring means no life-upending mood episodes. I have a happy partnership and two delightful kids and I couldn’t ask for more.

What are your thoughts on religion? I’m not religious and my own experience being raised in the Catholic church was frankly traumatic, but I know that it’s a source of comfort and community for many others and I think that’s awesome for them.

Do you think that there are aliens out there? I think so, although I think that we may not even know what other kinds of life to look for and may not recognize it even if we find it.

What’s something that’s been on your mind recently? We’re moving cross-country in less than a month (driving, no less, nearly 5000 km) and I still have so much to do to get ready aosjdoajdoasijdoaijsd

[sleepingrenjun]

all of the autumn asks? 👉👈

lantern - how did you meet your best friend? what were your first impressions of eachother?

we met at school like 6 years ago or something but we’ve only been friends since December 2017 & best friends since last summer! she apparently thought I was intimidating & I thought she was a lil pretentious buT HEY BFF IF YA SEE THIS I LOVE U SO ITS OKAY 😂

frost - if you could give some advice to your younger self, what would you say?

answered here!

maple - is there a hobby/skill that you’ve always wanted to try but never did?

ngl I’ve been pretty keen on snowboarding for a while but I’ve never tried it! maybe I will this winter 🤷🏼‍♀️

harvest - what fictional character do you most identify with? why?

probably aelin galathynius from the ‘throne of glass’ book series! she’s feminine but also feisty and fierce, she’s strong & good at masking her emotions but is actually quite soft at times & I see a lot of that in myself! (I’ve answered this in more depth before here!)

fireside - if you had your dream wardrobe, what would it look like?

aghhhh I could literally spend all day answering this - I LOVE fashion! but to put it simply, I’d have a huge range of colours & I’d have loads of streetstyle, grunge & cosy clothing! not to mention I’d probably add to my already large doc marten collection & I’d have a section just for elaborate ballgowns cause why tf not 😂

cider - a food that you disliked as a child but now enjoy?

CURRY! I used to hate it and refuse to eat it but now I eat it like every week and whenever I go out for food w my dad we go to an Indian!!

amber - share an unpopular opinion that you may have.

answered here!

fog - how well do you think you’d do in a zombie apocalypse scenario?

I actually think I’d do pretty well! I’m quite good at keeping calm when other people are freaking out about something & I can be pretty sneaky when I need to be, idk I think I’d survive for a while but who knows 🤷🏼‍♀️

jack-o-lantern - if you could look like any celebrity, who would you choose?

I’d probably choose halsey or kendall jenner tbh they’re just absolutely gorgeous

spice - have you ever encountered a house that you believe to be haunted?

no I don’t think so! I don’t really believe in ghosts... (bet I just jinxed myself by saying that!!)

orchard - share one thing that you’d like to happen this autumn.

hmmmm ig I’d quite like to meet a new guy and yano see where it goes (ideally a musician cause I’m a sucker for musicians) but knowing me that ain’t gonna happen sooo

crow - which school subject do you wish you had an aptitude for?

mmm ngl I think I was pretty good at all the subjects I’d wanna be good at cause that’s where my interests lie... sciences weren’t my strongest point but I don’t care for them so I can’t really answer this 🤷🏼‍♀️

bonfire - describe your dream house.

I have 2! firstly, a light, airy rooftop apartment in Paris with a balcony overlooking the city & enough room for me and my best friend to live! but also, I dream of having a modern house in the Norwegian fjords right by the water, it’d have huge windows & lots of timber cladding & interesting spaces to explore & it’d have the most incredible views imaginable!

cinnamon - if you had to live in a time period different than the present, which would you choose and where?

okay I know it’s not that long ago but the 70s & 80s & probably in the uk! the music scene was amazing back then & roller skating & discos n all that fun shit they did during that period!!

cobweb - (if you’ve graduated) do you miss high school?

I graduated like 18 months ago & nah not at all, I miss my friends and a couple of teachers but that’s it!!

cranberry - what’s one physical feature that you get complimented on?

my hair! idk why but people like it apparently

maize - share the weirdest encounter you’ve had with a stranger on the street.

a couple of weeks ago I was out on a shoot in town (I study fashion photography) and this random guy came up and posed behind the girl I was photographing - he put his hand on her shoulder n started saying some weird shit, was proper creepy

quilt - how do you take your tea (or coffee?)

I just have a tiny drop of milk in my tea & if I have coffee then I either have a mocha (iced or hot) or just a plain latte!

pumpkin - do you think that humans are inherantly good or bad?

I believe that some are inherently good and some are inherently bad... not one or the other!

moonlit - are you a neat or messy person? Is your room / house orderly?

my room is pretty clean and orderly tbh but my mind is insanely messy!! (Idk if that makes sense but it does to me)

flannel - have you ever gone on a bad date?

yuppp my first date with my ex was pretty awful - the restaurant we went to fucked up our food order & then he forgot to take ID to the cinema and they wouldn’t let us in so it was an absolute disaster

cocoa - if you could have any type of hair, what colour and cut would you have?

I’d probably keep my natural colour or have it icy blonde!! I’d keep it around collarbone length (like it is now) and I’d have it messy-wavy instead of straight! (might have a fringe too if I was feeling daring)

ghost - is there someone that you miss having in your life?

yeah there are a couple of people I miss having in my life a lot

[stan-and-the-newbie]

A kpop newbie’s reaction to LOONA

you know i had to do it to ‘em

Alexa: bold

Alex: italic

okay so today you're reacting to Loona!

o, noice

they just debuted like two days ago and everyone is crying

damn. ok but do any of them speak english <<

y es

n  u  t

i believe i already told you, they built this Loonaverse, and released a girl each month

yeh, you told me a few things

right. all of them have an animal and a color. the first five girls have an additional location, then the next three girls have a superpower, and the last four girls have a fruit

...alexa. t-twelve

yeah

<-<

>->

alright fam hit me up

okay, the first girl that was released, back in 2016, is heejin

damn she looks like a disney princess

she does;;

this is aN INSULT

isnT IT

someone arrest her, she's not allowed to be so cute. it is illegal.

how old is she and what does she do

uhh she's 21and she's a singer

she iS BORN IN 2000

... ALEXA WE'RE MOVING TO KOREA PACK YOUR SHIT

ill give you her music video now

alright

the location is hard to guess, so just try to guess her color and animal

hmm

*ViViD*

i'm not watching this u freak, you know about my arachnophobia

y tho. there are no spiders

THERE IS ONE IN THE THUMBNAIL, BIG AND RED

there are no spiders, so play the song, its good. no girl has the spider as her animal u coward

the song's aight. i'd listen to it in a cafe. her animal is obviously a bunny and her color is either red or white. asian girls with thick thighs are too powerful alexa. someone needs to do something about them. it's a health hazard.

omf. her color is actually hot pink;; but u got her animal right lol

o damn. well pink is the mix between red and white isn't it >>

ooOOO

pFFF

she's part of the first subunit, 1/3

ah, so she's a colonel

omG. i mean, y'know, subunits are some of the members that form like a band of their own and put out music

with 12 bloody members, i can imagine

loona has three. anyway, a few things about heejin

hit me

she’s a whole cutie

o gee i couldn't notice

sdfdsdf she likes dad jokes and randomly breaks into silly and awkward dances but she doesn't care. she's also afraid of pigeons 

the guards would have to restrain me from pinching her cheeks if i was ever in the same room with her. and to be fair those things are chaotic evil. one literally flew into my face once.

omf

they also carry diseases similarly to rats. except they fly. so yeah, i can see why one would be afraid.

she also named a rabbit from the set "heekki". hee from her name, and kki from the korean word for rabbit, tokki. and proceeded to ask if she could adopt it.

that's adorable go away i am stone cold

is there anything else u want to know about her. her location is paris, and the first ever video of her beside her mv was her repeating random french phrases she knew in the airport

pfffF.

the next member is hyunjin

they’re all so pretty i cry

they are :(

they are like porcelain dolls, but without the creepiness of a doll, just the beauty and cuteness

i KNOW. so, how old is she

hmm 20 and she's a rapper

she is ALSO born in 2000 ;D and she's a singer

i-

here's her music video

after mark's video on that cat game, the thumbnail horrifies me

o-oh

alight so her animal is a kitteh. so she's the neko of the group, noice... is this a thriller film, geez.

ghjkjhghjk its just a kitten smh

an e v i l kitten

cats cant be evil. her song is very kdrama-ish

her color is... i honestly have no idea

her color appears in the first third of the video

green? blue?

she wears it

lemon

yeh, yellow. and yes her animal is cat lol. what about the song? it’s a drastic change from the last one

ok that last part horrified me. idk it's a weird mix between depression and a drug trip

so, about this baby. her location is tokyo, and she is the savage one

o-oh

shes the one that kept a blank face on a rollercoaster while the others were screaming. also, she really likes bread and croissants

and she's not a rapper smh. well, she does have a pretty voice.

she does~ and shes really sporty, practiced a lot of sports before becoming an idol

alright, off to my wife. this is haseul.

and no photo makes her justice

i-

UGH queen

that jawline fam

i’m sorry i just. literally have never seen such a beautiful woman

alright by now i'm about 70% convinced that these people are created in underground governmental labs

m e. aight, how old is she

fucc it, she's uhh 18

she's actually born in 1997 dfgfdsdfgh

OF COURSE. sigh. that's just my luck

but i understand u

they all look between 15 and 20 anyway does it really matter- i- she's more pretty than she is cute. respecc.

this is her music video

her color is bleagh. i mean bleuugh. blue

omf

she's a parappa the rapper. but she's also a singer. idk her voice sounds like she can rap. was that plane just there and they used it or did they buy a gigantic plane prop for the video

(i really hoped alex would say this because this video exists)

i-

she’S TRYING. her color is green but her location is iceland so liek,,, i guess the writers clashed ideas

blasphemy. they should have went for turquoise

her animal is a dove. she’s also the leader of the group, and the mom friend #1. she can speak english but she has a cute accent which i Love

awh

aaaand she’s a seal enthusiast

o. that's something

they went to iceland so she was like "omg a seal!!! hi !! that was a seal!!"

pffa whole cutie

she is :( she’s also really funny

anyway, the next one makes me feel worthless. this is yeojin

another flawless creation of the secret korean labs

her age?

that tissue-printing chamber in that korean lab from avengers 2? not fiction - they use it to create idols. uhh 19

:D she is 15!!!1

...

and turns 16 in november !!

Goodbye. Tty later, i gotta pack my stuff

dfgfdGHJH here is her song. its very cute because, well, shes a child

L O L I C O N    A L E R T. those three dudes are terrifying. is that the joker wearing a frog head

mmmmaybeh

this is weird lmfao. aaand there's the foot fetish

you’RE HORRIBLE

why is the frog dude going all roaring reeo on her only to give her a fucking present

well, its a song about how she doesn’t want the relationship to move too fast, so she doesn’t want to kiss the dude just yet

that ending was just... idk man. this one broke me. her color is red, and her animal is a frog because that's the only animal in the foreground here idfk

her color is orange, close enough. the other members call her "bean" because shes the youngest and rlly smol and chubby.

awh ;;

and everyone treats her like a baby lmao

well, what did u expect. hmm i think i like the first one the best so far

o, alright

so, these past four girls and the fifth one form the subunit 1/3. the fifth one was introduced through the subunit's first song, but i'll give u their second song cuz its Better

*check out “Sonatine it’s superior*

basically, these girls have a very dreamy concept with a lot of piano and strings. the fifth girl is the pink haired one, and baby yeojin isn’t here cuz her grades were dropping lmao

i-

shhhh just listen to the song

this song gives me the sad

u gotta appreciate the animu songs

i do, i was literally gonna say that this one somewhat reminds me of miia's second song

same !!

her color is W H I T E like my teeth. p u r e  w h i t e

she haS HER OWN mv

o

the fifth member is vivi

shes chinese and the oldest

from communism to idolization. noice

i-

so she's wot, 21? 22?

yeh, shes turning 22 this year

noice

here’s her song

a break from the animu songs. ps: they dont come back

sad. kinda stalkerish fam

ikr. shes a hooman here. but in the subunit mvs she’s an android

what

idk fam they go all out and no one knows whats happening

i am gonna get bashed for this but when she smiles her cheeks look kinda weird she kinda looks like a chipmunk? but not in a bad way

ghjkHJ she does;; shes cute though

yeah

her color is her haircolor lawl. pastel rose

o, nice

and her animal is deer

so she's basically bambi gotcha

she speaks english, and shes the reaction memes queen. and shes also very smol

awh ;;

alright, we're done with 1/3. is heejin still your favourite?

yepp

cuz we're entering girl crush land

o h

the sixth member is kim lip

LISTEN YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO DO THIS

she’s cute tho

of course she is. they're all cute perfect goddesses. i'm noticing a pATTERN HERE

hey, shes mostly a tsundere

well, ngl, she looks like one

sdfgfds

she chose charmander tho 10/10

here’s her amazing mv. her animal appears for 1 second here so lmao good luck. her color is very obvious

white, at long last

the other one

FUCK

SDFGFDSD

red?

yes

that building is aesthetic would hang out there with my weird friends 10/10. the song is odd, but it's nice

i think the song really suits her voice

it does! that's why it works

her animal is an owl

n o i c e

also in one of her vlogs all she does is talk about food. she also keeps the members company while theyre shooting their mvs!! and shes also a reaction meme queen. she sings, but her main strength is dancing

yeah, i can tell

oh right !! she is in the odd eye circle subunit, and these girls have super powers. imma tell you now, the odd eye circle members are in different planes. like, theyre in different dimensions, not the flying planes lol

umm alright..?

anyway, her super power is speed. aaaand i think thats it with kim lip

the next one is a fan favourite. jinsoul

oof. idk man the blond is weird

oh, is it. i dunno, i feel like it suits her.

hammers in that "created in an underground lab to be flawless" vibe. idk, maybe a darker shade? like a golden blonde?

most people choose her song as their favourite

singing in the rain? is tom holland gonna come in and dance to "umbrella"?

oh my god

if not i'll be disappointed. the song reminds me of minecraft intros lmao. especially that synth part

geT OUT LMAO

the dancing is lewd af tho. so 8/10

well, so was eclipse. girl crush land

is she a necromancer? because those hips kill me and bring me back to life

i knOW. she can sing, rap and dance. triple threat. okay you cant possibly be wrong about her color and animal

uhh blue and fish. idk wot fish but a fish

y e s. its a blue betta fish. she said, and i quote "the blue betta fish is one that needs to be kept alone, because it eats the other fish in her tank. so i'm going to take over the group like that"

i- IS THE ENTIRE SECOND SUBUNIT SASSY

SDFGHGFDSSDFGH shes very oblivious and confused also idk if i should show you this but its hella funny and falls into the dumb blonde stereotype. she acts cute in a live stream and then she just

*that beautiful face plant video*

and at the enD KIM LIP IS LIKE "yes. whats next?" and looks through the comments

i-is she ok

yeah, she just stays there like ten seconds and then lifts her head while laughing. her superpower is teleportation btw. anyway, shes just very oblivious and awkward

nice man

the next member is choerry

oof, she qt. her color is purple.

yes. she doesnt like cherries btw

of course. why doesn't she like them? they're gud ;; maybe they remind her of all the bad puns she must have had to endure

i- most likely tbh. she prefers her actual name too sdfgfdsasdf. but choerry is a play on her name. cho yerim.

ah, i see

here's her song that takes a very weird turn and supports further the girl crush concept lawl

i expect lewd dancing. wot’s her animal?

a bat

e d g y. they made her eat a cherry. the monsters

i know, the madmen

o, here comes the lewd dancing. oof, that was short, but it was cool. back to... this??

it happens more than once. hmm, its a really nice song tbh

yeah, it was pretty nice

shes the bright, positive one

and managed to feed a squirrel out of her hand, so shes a princess confirmed

o damn how tall is she. she looks pretty tall in this pic

oh my god all of them are so small i literally cannot cope

;-; pure babies

hmm i think this is old information but the tallest is 165 sdfsGHJKJHJ

o damn

it says here shes 160. p u r e. her super power is plane travelling, like, shes the only one who can meet both kim lip and jinsoul. thats why i told you about the dimension thing

..alright..? this seems pretty redundant, idk. the whole superpower thing and the different planes thing is just odd. what purpose do they serve

well, its basically a whole universe, i guess it ties to the whole story

there's a story? uhh

yeah, but we won't get into that too much. here's odd eye circle's debut song

oh, this song is... something. i could live without the weird distorted voice. fucc yes more lewd dancing. well, that was trippy.

anyway, the third subunit is called yyxy, and it has "fall from eden" as their concept

o

the first member from this subunit is yves, pronounced as eve but it gotta be fancy y'know

oo, noice. please for the love of god tell me her color is white

no one's color is white

well, it’s not a color ;D

ug h. anyway, here’s her song.

hecc yes more lewd dancing

omf

the song is.. odd. GET OUTTA HERE HER COLOR IS TOTALLY WHITE. EVERYTHING HERE I WHITE. SHE WEARS ALL WHITE.

:( her apple is burgundy

what. is that- is that her color

yeah

...i quit.

fgfdghjkghjGHJ

well, that was something

her name is eve, so people speculate the song and mv are about her living a normal life after falling from eden y'know. anyway, shes the mom friend #2

o, interesting pFF

she was very awkward at the beginning, when she first was introduced

awh ;;

and her animal is a swan

AND HER COLOR ISN'T WHITE GET OUTTA HERE

fgfdsdfg shes also pretty savage now that she isnt as shy, but she takes care of the members, since shes one of the older membersGHJKJHGHJK

wholesome

shes very cute i like her uwu

the next one is an actual animu waifu. her name is chuu

i-

and she is the full of cuteness member

yeah i can teLL. the second image scraped my stone heart

yes, she softens everyone. here’s her mv, and the other girl is yves. and chuu is more or less in love with her. lesbian icon

alexa ur doing the thing, but reverse

SHES LITERALLY STALKING YVES AND GIVING HER AN APPLE AND THE SONG IS ABOUT ROMANTIC LOVE get outta here

ALL OF THESE BANDS ARE BASICALLY FAMILIES YALL SHIPPING THEM IS INCEST

ASDFGFDSDFGHJ but yves just shot a heart at her

it's a music video smh

hey, im not saying shes gay for yves in real life, just in, like, the universe theyre building

ah, i see. the choreography is gud. and the whole music video is nice. and the song is nice too. alright, what's her color

peach

do these people only know red and blue variations. THERE ARE OTHER COLORS OUT THERE

her animal is penguin, hence her posing with a penguin plushie in that photo

awh ;;

and her fruit is strawberry. she also sang a kids show ost before she became an idol :( and the other members make her act cute sometimes in front of the camera because everyone loves her. take dis

:'c

when she does the winking thing she stops and asks "why am i doing this..." and the others are just "because its cutE"

s-STONE COLD I AM S T O N E C O L D

anyway, yes, we all love chuu

we have two members left, keep your head in the game

i'm in it to win it

the second to last member is go won

speaking of winning, apparently she already did

she is a real life doll- oh my god alex

yet another qt what is new. cute dolls. cute talented dolls e v e r y w h e r e

i remember her song just because of the way she sings "baby" there

o

*check out “One&Only” yall*

ah, i see. some nice cinematography here. she has an interesting voice

shes mostly a rapper

yeah, i can picture that. that was a pretty nice song

her color is eden green :3

n o i c e

her animal is butterfly and her fruit is pineapple

but does she like it on pizza tho >> that is the question

she's kinda cold, but shes pretty oblivious, the staff messed with her saying that "adam" is her stage name (adam translates to "small" in korean) and she actually believed them and she didnt get the joke either affdsdfg

;-; god bless

shes pretty savage tho, we have three so far

oof

she is olivia hye

and she does not appreciate olive jokes

she's pretty 0^0

she is~

wot's her personality

shes very blunt and she seems like someone that might succeed at being a famous blogger

o damn

she always speaks her mind. i haven’t really seen her play around, but that doesn’t mean i don’t find her funny sdfgfsdfg

pff the mom friend

hmm, she doesnt really take care of the others, shes the second youngest

o rlly

but she does boast about how shes the only one without a fear of heights jasdfjks

pfff alright, hmu with her song

her song is my favourite

*”Egoist” ftw*

s m o o t h. yeah, this is a nice song

ikr !!

aaand more lewd dancing the world is kind to me today

they never give it up

wot's her color and animal

her color is gray, her animal is wolf and her fruit is plum

o damn

here’s their song~

this is hype af. this song is nice too but it has odd parts

i feel like the quality of their music increased with time. the first songs are also nice but you can tell these ones are better put together

well, it makes sense

it has been two years yes asdfdsdfg

o o f

here's a predebut song. the first ever with all of them, but not their debut the intro and the chorus are the best parts ngl

that's a lot of idols fam

eh, 12 isnt that rare. BRRRRRRRRRAH

where the esketit at. that was a pretty good predebut song, all things considered. they fit a bit of everything in there

yep, here’s their debut song

this one's trippy. ah, that's why it's called "hi high" they're saying hi to me, and i'm high after watching it. UOUOUOUAAAHH

I ONLY LISTEN TO MUSIC WITH MEANINGFUL LYRICS

HLBJLNKBJLNKBKLN

do you remember any of them as your favourite or did everything already vanish

i like chuu and the last one but i think the first is still my fave

oo alright, i see. any last thoughts?

well-managed for a 12 idol group, nice choreographies (& lots of lewd dancing >>), plenty of good songs, gud stuff overall, 10/10. 11/10 for the UOUOUOUOOAAAHHH

noicE

alexa here!! oof, this took so long to put together;; also if haseul sees this please marry me goddess ily

i hope you enjoy this post, even though its a little messy!! pop a little message in our ask box too, it’ll make our day~ i hope everyone has a nice day or evening!!

[foundcarcosa]

ccc.

1. Favorite childhood book? >> (Three hundred surveys posted to this blog, wow. --I mean, over the course of nearly a decade I’ve probably filled out at least ten thousand, but.) I think that distinction would have to go to The Phantom Tollbooth. It’s one of the only books I remember owning, probably because I’d paged through it so many times. I also modified all the illustrations with pen so that Milo looked like a woman. 2. What are you reading right now? >> Condensed Chaos by Phil Hine -- more like limping through it, because I stopped setting aside time specifically for reading so I just end up grabbing a half a chapter here and there. I’ll have to do something about that. I’d started The Poisonwood Bible a while ago, too, but I keep forgetting to continue it. 3. What books do you have on request at the library? >> I rarely borrow books from the library unless they’re e-books because of my tendency to have to repeatedly renew and eventually take it back before I’m finished because I ran out of renews. 4. Bad book habit? >> Not reading. 5. What do you currently have checked out at the library? >> I don’t, for the reasons stated above. But for all the shit I talk about Grand Rapids, it has a lovely main branch, so I’ll probably end up stopping in again soon, maybe spending a few hours there for a change of scenery.

6. Do you have an e-reader? >> I have a phone, which functions as my e-reader. I also have a Kindle, but between its wack amount of storage space and its quick-draining battery, it’s been relegated to the position of glorified mousepad at this point. (It’s too bad, because I like the screen size.) 7. Do you prefer to read one book at a time, or several at once? >> Two or three at once. I think it’s interesting to see if/how they subconsciously weave themselves together in my imagination, even if -- especially if -- they’re about completely unrelated things. 8. Have your reading habits changed since starting a blog? >> It’s the internet in general that interferes with my reading habits, not just tumblr, but tumblr obviously plays a part. 9. Least favorite book you read this year (so far?) >> I quit on Cormac McCarthy’s The Road like 10 pages in, and I don’t usually do that but for some reason I got bored really quickly and couldn’t see the point in pushing through. That’s not a total vote in its disfavour because I didn’t actually form a full opinion. Sometimes I just pick up a book at the wrong time and have to wait until I reach the point in my life when I’ll need it. I’ll probably try again in a couple of years. 10. Favorite book you’ve read this year? >> I really enjoyed Reincarnation Blues, I thought it was an amazing story. I also got a lot out of M. K. Asante Jr’s It’s Bigger Than Hip Hop. When the Stars Are Right by Scott R Jones was fascinating as hell, and then of course there was my long-overdue (or maybe right-on-time, considering...) American Gods reread... 11. How often do you read out of your comfort zone? >> Occasionally. The thing is, there are so many books in my comfort zone that I want to read... 12. What is your reading comfort zone? >> I don’t know if it’s quantifiable. I like a lot of different kinds of books. I usually know within 10-15 pages of a book if I’m going to like it or not -- I try not to judge books by their covers, but I definitely judge them by their first chapter. 13. Can you read on the bus? >> Sometimes, but I generally prefer to listen to music and look out the window.

14. Favorite place to read? >> In bed. 15. What is your policy on book lending? >> I’ll give books away. Just take it, read it. Pay it forward. I don’t like to hoard books. 16. Do you ever dog-ear books? >> Hell yes, I do. They’re not a sacred object to me; their contents may well be sacred, but their contents already exist in me because I ate them.  17. Do you ever write in the margins of your books? >> Nah. 18. Not even with text books? >> I don’t use textbooks. 19. What is your favorite language to read in? >> I can only read in English. 20. What makes you love a book? >> It’s a very visceral and subconscious thing, and it’s not dependent on genre or the politics of the author or any of that as much as it’s dependent on who I am at that moment in time, what story I need to hear, and how lovingly the author told it. That sounds like it only applies to fiction books, but it really doesn’t.  21. What will inspire you to recommend a book? >> Some level of understanding of the person I’m recommending it to. 22. Favorite genre? >> I don’t know, honestly. 23. Genre you rarely read (but wish you did?) >> I wish I read more science fiction. The thing is, most of the scifi stories I love I kind of stumbled into accidentally. Whenever I go looking for scifi specifically, I run into a lot of duds (not that they’re badly written or anything, just that they’re bad for me). I’m going to try Philip K Dick soon and I hope that works out okay. 24. Favorite biography? >> I don’t have one. 25. Have you ever read a self-help book? >> Sure, but I don’t make a habit of it.

26. Favorite cookbook? >> I don’t have one. Well, okay, Feeding Hannibal is pretty cool, ngl, but mostly for the information rather than the actual recipes. We can’t afford to (or don’t have the room/appliances to) make most of that stuff. 27. Most inspirational book you’ve read this year (fiction or non-fiction)? >> Definitely American Gods, but that’s a hard-to-explain thing, lol. The Taboo Against Knowing Who You Are is a good runner-up, because as far as inspiration is concerned, Alan Watts probably had more than his fair share of it. (Do comic books count, because if so I’d like to also add in Promethea.) 28. Favorite reading snack? >> Alcohol. (But also anything I can eat with one hand, or doesn’t require a lot of, like, attention.) 29. Name a case in which hype ruined your reading experience. >> I don’t think that’s ever happened. 30. How often do you agree with critics about a book? >> I don’t read critic reviews often enough to know what the ratio of agreement to disagreement would even be like. 31. How do you feel about giving bad/negative reviews? >> A negative review is just as valuable as a positive review. I’d prefer people not be nasty in their negative reviews, but like... I also don’t have to read their review if I don’t like it. It’s not that big of a deal to me. 32. If you could read in a foreign language, which language would you chose? >> Russian, probably. I imagine untranslated Russian lit would be amazing to read. 33. Most intimidating book you’ve ever read? >> And actually finished? Ha! Let’s see... as far as length, I’d probably pick whatever the longest Stephen King book that I’ve read is. (He meanders, man. He fucking meanders. It’s great, but dear god.) As far as content, I’m probably gonna go with Atlas Shrugged. For, I mean, obvious reasons, really. 34. Most intimidating book you’re too nervous to begin? >> That doesn’t really happen to me. If I want to read something, I’ll start reading it. If it proves prohibitive to my limited ability to understand shit, then I’ll put it down and move on. 35. Favorite poet? >> I don’t have one. 36. How many books do you usually have checked out of the library at any given time? >> Zero. When I do check out from the library, I stick to three books max. 37. How often have you returned book to the library unread? >> Quite often. Usually because I ran out of time. 38. Favorite fictional character? >> YEAH, OKAY. 39. Favorite fictional villain? >> Actually that is almost impossible for me to determine because I don’t even put the “villain” flag on characters unless it’s super fucking obvious (like in a comic book) that they’re supposed to be the Token Bad Guy. I just don’t even think in those terms. -- Now that I say that, though, I remembered that Stephen King characters are written very polarised despite my personal interpretations of them, so I suppose my favourite villain is Walter O’Dim. 40. Books I’m most likely to bring on vacation? >> I don’t know, I don’t usually have time to read on vacation. Unless it’s on the plane or something, in which case I just bring whatever I happen to be reading at the time. It’s usually on my phone, anyway. 41. The longest I’ve gone without reading. >> I mean, I don’t go a day without reading something, even if it’s just articles I saw on my facebook feed. 42. Name a book that you could/would not finish. >> Fifty Shades of Grey. (I did try. I wrote detailed posts about my thoughts during my attempt to read it. They’re still on my old blog.) 43. What distracts you easily when you’re reading? >> Everything. It’s just hard for me to turn the “noise” (literal and figurative noise) of the world off in general, which is why I like it quiet when I’m trying to focus. 44. Favorite film adaptation of a novel? >> Well, LOTR. I was going to say Predestination but All You Zombies isn’t a novel. Uhh.... :/ 45. Most disappointing film adaptation? >> Good god, so many. 46. The most money I’ve ever spent in the bookstore at one time? >> Around $100, I guess. I don’t have much money in general so I try to just... avoid bookstores. 47. How often do you skim a book before reading it? >> I don’t. The first-chapter test usually works just fine. 48. What would cause you to stop reading a book half-way through? >> Boredom. 49. Do you like to keep your books organized? >> Well, we don’t own enough for a complex system to be required. 50. Do you prefer to keep books or give them away once you’ve read them? >> I really prefer to give them away. It’s just... I’m not a hoarder (I don’t even mean that in the negative sense, I just mean I don’t like hanging onto stuff I’m not actively using). I spent just about all of my adult life up until 2 years ago homeless or some version of transient and having to be ruthlessly exacting about how many belongings I had at any given time really changed the way my brain works regarding material items. I love being able to own things now, but it’s... hard to enjoy having too many objects. I get tetchy. It feels inorganic. Maybe that’ll change in the future (these things often do), but for now owning more than 20 or so books feels like an overindulgence. 51. Are there any books you’ve been avoiding? >> I don’t think so. 52. Name a book that made you angry. >> I can’t think of one right now. 53. A book you didn’t expect to like but did? >> The Fountainhead. Any Rand book, actually, because Vlad couldn’t stand her and we had such similar tastes in media that I figured I wouldn’t either. But the immense amount of annoying peer pressure from Sigma eventually got me to pick it up just to get them off my back, and..... well, the rest is hilarious “I’m in love with a crazy Russian woman who makes me want to yell at her constantly” history. 54. A book that you expected to like but didn’t? >> I don’t know. That doesn’t happen very often. 55. Favorite guilt-free, pleasure reading? >> All of it? I don’t feel guilty about anything I read.

[avabenjamin]

‪"To the bone" trailer (also the new movie “feed”) ruined my night yesterday I was out here pacing and cryinnnn ngl. I’m not the gal to be this sensitive over a movie/show but hear me out. If this gets publicity like 13rw. I’m OUT. this ones way more backwards like if u care about people with EDS DONT PULL THIS SHIT (-: simple omg.

(Fully aware that some of the actors and the director have a past with an ed, and do amazing charity work) I’m not criticising lily or Keanu AT ALL, I appreciate her background with an ed.l and I think she’s so brave for it)

yes mental health should be talked about, but it’s like, that doesn’t take away from the character ygm? It’s a fiction film and the scenes of the trailer are taking the piss, there awful (triggering to the point of a relapse). It stigmatises mental illness, and 100% glamourises it. Her character is sassy, pretty and beautifully tragic, in a romantic way? get it taken down or im outta this joint /:‬

“I wish I had that problem” you wouldn’t wish for cancer or other life ending illnesses !!!

‪"it’s like you have calorie aspergers" *fist pumps* Get Away ya fool, they were celebrating??? when I was like 13 I would have watched it and get “tips"and shit. ‬I would have admired her character and thought of her as beautifully tragic. just based on the 2 minute trailer, it doesn’t show the ugly side of an ed.

‪nah im actually fuming with this ngl.‬ ‪it’s the production and choice of character really. her, being someone i imagine i’d watch (when I was younger) n think woah i wish i could be like her. It already looks very cookie cutter, stereotypical girl with an eating disorder, who’s too skinny, counts all her calories, looks a certain way, and denies everything. “You look like a ghost”.

To an extent, that’s very real, but that’s not how all eds are at all. Even the name suggests you have to look a certain way to have an ed. a healthy looking body doesn’t equal a healthy mind (eating disorders are a mental illness not a physical one.) ‬

‪ppl may see this as taking it too seriously, but 1 in 4 ppl die with this illness. And the trailer alone promotes the wrong ideas. The dealt by makeup and close up of her bones rllllyyyy is just a criteria to who and who doesn’t have anorexia… :/ it makes a lot of us feel so invalid bc we didn’t look that sick at our lowest. It also makes someone struggling think “I’m not sick enough yet bc I don’t look as thin as her, so I don’t need help rn” ‬ Kinda reminds me of Cassie from skins: “I didn’t eat for three days so I could be lovely” that saids the COMPLETE wrong message to susceptible young people.

WHAT is comical about eating disorders. all the people saying we can’t step on eggshells around EDs is bullshit because humans are inherently vulnerable and respond to role models thus a show portraying a beautiful witty teen with an ED will never be ok

(Also I ain’t the only one who feels this way about the trailer at all) Weight is simply a side effect of an eating disorder, but so is comparison. Maybe you were never tubed or forced into treatment or underweight. But it doesn’t make u less valid.

‪I’m still on the fence about this show, but I rlly admire lily and everyone for it. Just already have some issues with the way it’s been constructed. even tho it may help the minority of sufferers to have an idol etc, it still has its hung ups.‬ it would be amazing if it helped someone recover (as it’s a happy ending) it’s it’s cool to be proud of the context of the movie, but it promotes toxic actions and behaviours and 100% glamourises an ed, no doubt about it.

I’m sick to death of eds being portrayed in a glamorous light, or shown to be a phase/ problem that a little therapy can fix. To all vulnerable and impressionable audiences of the film, I fucking hope it doesn’t have a bad influence on ya bb

"To the bone" will be another middle class white girl who has anorexia and becomes skinny but makes some miraculous recovery. It will add nothing new to the eating disorder discussion and yet again, ignores OSFED. Anorexia is the most talked about and the most represented. There are countless movies and documentaries on it already with side characters having other types of eating disorders. For once I'd just like a movie that has an overweight/healthy weight person who has been starving and gets the help they need.

It make sufferers who are perhaps not as underweight (or who are unable to see themselves as that underweight) consequently see these underweight scenes and feel that they cannot seek help because they aren’t “thin enough” or “bad enough”. Just thinking of the millions of young people who will watch it on Netflix KILLS ME inside. The show will make people without an ed think that that’s the reality of EDs, and not take certain people seriously. I hope they at least portray the loneliness/ brutality of an ed, if not the ugliness. :/ This show will 100% trigger someone into a relapse, that may/ will kill them. when it airs in a week, and ur in recovery pls be careful.

‪I called Netflix to let em kno.‬ it’s a free call too. ‪if u don’t agree, leave it be, just don’t make it cinematic ukno. stressed tf out. sigh. ‬

[stainedglassgardens]

Watched in April

Erasing Eden

Destroyer

Unicorn Store

May the Devil Take You (Sebelum iblis menjemput)

People in Cars

Presentation

Ink

Hedgehog

Koyaanisqatsi

Wanda

The Silence

24 Davids

The Frame

The Talented Mr. Ripley

Baraka

Wayne’s World

Stories We Tell

Born in Flames

Jesse’s Girl

I Walked With a Zombie

Mary Goes Round

The Green Fog

Psycho

Someone Great

Indifferent stuff

Unicorn Store (Brie Larson, 2019)

May the Devil Take You (Sebelum iblis menjemput, Timo Tjahjanto, 2018)

People in Cars (Daniel Lundh, 2017)

Presentation (Danielle Kampf, 2017)

Hedgehog (Lindsey Copeland, 2016)

The Silence (John R. Leonetti, 2019): I’ll be honest, I only watched this because I love the lead actors... and ngl, the monster creatures were pretty nifty, but this was your standard-fare Netflix monster apocalypse film. On top of which I thought the heroes were pretty terrible people, as opposed to, for instance, the leads in Bird Box

Baraka (Ron Fricke, 1992): This just lacked the unity, purpose and general feeling of doom of Koyaanisqatsi... not to mention the music situation

Jesse’s Girl (M. Keegan Uhl, 2018)

Mary Goes Round (Molly McGlynn, 2017): Not that there’s anything wrong with this film, and Aya Cash is obviously wonderful in it, I’ve just... seen a lot of films that feel exactly like this (Hedgehog being another one of those, perhaps)

Pretty good

Ink and The Frame (Jamin Winans, 2009, 2014): I don’t love those but somehow I love the vision behind them -- and the aesthetics. I have found it hard to unearth small science fiction films that showed personality, and these are definitely two of those

Koyaanisqatsi (Godfrey Reggio, 1982): Let’s be honest, the best part about this is Philip Glass’s music -- but the whole film was pretty cool, and it’s one of those things where I can barely imagine seeing this in the cinema when it came out almost forty years ago

Wanda (Barbara Loden, 1970): It’s hard to say anything about this that isn’t super obvious but, it’s an important film, you should watch it

24 Davids (Céline Baril, 2017): This documentary is literally about twenty-four people all named David on four different continents, all doing different, unrelated things with their lives, but Céline Baril somehow makes this into be a coherent, fascinating whole -- about what exactly, I have no idea

The Talented Mr. Ripley (Anthony Minghella, 1999): I read the book a few months ago and thought I had to see this. The adaptation was pretty clever, and I loved the fact that they straight up invented a part just for Cate Blanchett

Wayne’s World (Penelope Spheeris, 1992): Believe me, I’m astounded too at how much I liked this

The Green Fog (Guy Maddin, Evan Johnson, and Galen Johnson, 2017): Vertigo meets Los Angeles Plays Itself, what more can I say?

Someone Great (Jennifer Kaytin Robinson, 2019): Just a good film about love and friendship and growing up

Favourites of the month

Erasing Eden (Beth Dewey, 2016): I had never heard of this film before I found it on Amazon Prime and decided to watch it because it was directed by a woman... and it’s one of those situations in which I have a pretty strong suspicion that the people who didn’t like it just completely misunderstood it -- but what can I say, I just really love a fucked-up leading lady -- and a good survival story, too

Destroyer (Karyn Kusama, 2018): This is a literal masterpiece and I am still in awe of what this film manages to achieve. It’s one of these crime films (Hell or High Water being another one) that completely transcend genre. Everything about it is perfect, it is flawlessly shot, Nicole Kidman is spectacular, and when you get to the end and everything falls into place you’re just completely blown away

Stories We Tell (Sarah Polley, 2012): I have wanted to see this film for many years, Polley’s other film Take This Waltz being my number-one favourite film. Take This Waltz, with its deceiving simplicity, makes me cry every single time, and I never usually cry watching anything -- but of course Stories We Tell, an autobiographical documentary, made me wail like a baby. It’s about her life, her mother’s life, about secrets and families, but more than that it is about stories themselves, versions of events, what we show and what we leave out. It made me fall in love with Polley and the deceiving simplicity of her work even more

Born in Flames (Lizzie Borden, 1983): Another one of those films that have been on my list forever, and every bit as good as I thought it would be -- probably more so. I love seeing films like these because they made me think that sometimes you just have to pick up your instrument of choice and start creating for sparks to fly

I Walked With a Zombie (Jacques Tourneur, 1943): What can I say -- it’s Tourneur, it’s zombies

Psycho (Alfred Hitchcock, 1960): I was surprised at how scary I found this, considering that I found both Vertigo and The Birds slightly ridiculous, but as it turns out, this holds up very well, especially if you’re a scaredy cat like me

This month I also watched most of Our Planet (just as amazing as Planet Earth), as well as two seasons of Queer Eye, and I started watching Street Food. I pretty much gave up on Community, or, I’ve been stuck on season five for weeks and I really do not want to start again.

All the same, it’s been a good month for film-watching. I love how I have turned it into a habit, to the point that I can barely remember what I used to do with my evenings before I watched five films a week. I have found that cinema is a lot easier to discuss with most people than literature is, and that, like most creations of the mind, it does not shut you off to other stuff, on the contrary -- it has allowed me to discover books and music I would never have encountered otherwise, and I am so happy that turning something so easy into a habit has been so rewarding in so many unexpected ways.

[i-amusemyself]

All Emoji Asks.

🐰 what is one secret youve never told anyone?I don't really have that many secrets. I guess theres a side of my personality that I spend a lot of energy supressing like hell that I hate with a passion.💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be?Right now? My best friend right next to me or my friend back home.🐹 what are some of your favourite pokemons and why?I mean, I only ever played pokemon go, but from that I loved the squirtles and the evees just bc theyre cute af🌠 if you were in charge of the world what would it be like?A lot more chilled out. Chill pills would be mandatory.👀 what was the most recent vivid dream you had?Okay I had two freaking weird ones the other night?In one I was a 10 y/o muslim girl going to a new primary school and while I was there I started raising money for a cancer charity.In the other I was taking a really hard A level maths exam and getting stressed and mad bc everyone kept talking and I couldnt finish it in time.☀ what do you like most about your best friend?EVERYTHING?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Idk, I guess how forgiving and layed back she is. She always tries to understand and see things from your point of view.😘 talk about your crush or partnerLmao I'm alone 😂 I do have a crush but its a million miles from mutual so like, shes amazing but boi it hurts 😂💁 if someone was rude to you would you be rude back?Depends on how well I know them and what they're like tbh. I'll banter, but I avoid confrontation.🌟 what do you like about yourself? (3 things)😂😂😂 wow erm...1. I always try and put in all the energy I have if someone/something needs it2. I make loads of terrible puns its gr93. I really dont have any other qualities idk🐾 what are you scared of most? How will you overcome it?👏 I'm terrified of abandonment 👏 aaaand as of yet I have no idea how to deal with it ngl🎁 what never fails to make you happy?Really good stand up commedy or my favourite music💙 what annoys you about some people?Their complete lack of self-awareness. Idk, maybe I'm low key jealous too but srsly some people????😤 do you get angry easily?Yeah. I keep pretty good tabs on it so you probs wouldnt know it, but if something upsets me, chances are I'm hella pissed too.🐇 what do you always daydream about?Dramatic and upsetting situations or drunk situations 😂🌻 if you could change 3 things about the world what would you change?1. Sort out equality and all that jazz2. Divide up the land more equally, bc it pisses me off that some people are living in tiny cramped shacks and others have 100 mile square farms.3. End capitalism and with that make all necessary services free.🍓 send me 4 names: kiss, befriend, kill or marry?Anon?✈ what is your dream city and why?I mean Ive always wanted to go to copenhagen but theres no guarantee its gonna be my fave. My fave so far is Amsterdam bc its so peaceful and the architecture is to die for.☕ talk about your ideal day?Spend it with my best friend/crush. Lay in bed late and be lazy and watch good TV/movies. Maybe go out in the afternoon to not go stir crazy and entertain ourselves. Stay up kinda late talking about deep shit, lying underneath the stars.🌸 are you an introvert, ambivert or extrovert?Ambivert!💧 when was the last time you cried?Yesterday lmao 😂 i havent gone more than 2 days without crying in the past week 😧 I just got myself into a nice Depression Episode.🎵 name 5 songs you like atm?Argh I havent listened to music in so long (7 days...) umm so things i wanna listen to- youth by daughter- voices by Motionless in white- living dead girl by rob zombie- corpse roads by keaton hensen- lost boy by troye sivan⚡ if you had any superpower what would it be and why?Mind reading bc my anxiety would be halved.💛 if you could talk to your younger self, what would you say?I'd tell myself to stop trying to fit in and be like everybody else because the people I know are just a tiny portion of the population and really aren't much to aspire to. I'd tell myself to drop all my shitty friends because it would stop me from dealing with a lot of crap later on. I'd point myself in the right direction of the better people 😂I'd teach myself how to stand up for myself and how to not take any crap.And I'd give myself a hug and tell myself it's okay not to be cishet, because maybe if I could turn back time and start to deal with it earlier I'd be okay with it now.💚 who are you jealous of and why?A lot of people really, with qualities I don't have.I suppose one kid in particular is like, everything i want to be. Kind, hillarious, confident, close to people I love. 💎 what would you rather have more of: intelligence, beauty, kindness, wealth or bravery? Why?Bravery or kindness?? Its hard to have one without the other. Also beauty ngl bc im fugly.🙊 what are you ashamed of?My gender and sexuality 👏🌺 which languages do you know? Which do you want to learn?I know english and spanish and I'm learning Danish. Hopefully once I'm okay at danish I can learn arabic. Ill be satisfied after that 😂☘ if you could be any fictional characters friend/lover who would it be and why?I mean, theres plenty of fictional lesbians where im like 😏👀 but honestly if I had to pick only one person I'd choose Kieren Walker from in the flesh bc he needs a friend and I relate to him so strongly.☁ talk about your dream universe.Mental and physical illness doesnt exist. People arent dicks. Everything is free. No one feels unloveable.💜 which acts of kindness are you going to do today?Idk I'm p much done for the day 😂 I've been helping out around the house all day tho🐬 if you could transform into any animal what would it be and why?I mean i might be biased but either a dog or a sloth bc they get to sleep all the time 😂🍄 talk about someone/something you really dislike.Someone I was best friends with for 4 years suddenly turned around and stabbed me in the back, made up shit about me, arranged that all my friends not talk to me for a fortnight, sent group emails stuffed with emotional manipulation and blamed me for her suicidal thoughts. I nearly ended it. Now I get to watch my friends still loving her like she isn't the world's most heartless person. It makes my blood boil.😣 talk about something that has been making you depressed/angry/anxious.I'm staying with my best friend rn and I can't stand the thought of going home.🍪 what did you want to be as a kid and what do you want to be now?I wanted to be a nurse and now I wanna be a doctor 👏 variety 👏🍰 what are some of your favourite sugary foods?I cant really eat sugar 😂 so fuck knows? Chocolate?🍑 what are you obsessed with?Brains, thought processes, psychopaths, graveyards and more 😂💘 what happens to you when youre stressed?I just get really emotional and start agressively making lists everywhere in an attempt to sort my life out.😪 what are you sick of?Humanity.🙀 are you an adrenaline seeker?Yeah its terrible 😂 i hate anxiety but I also kinda love it when my heart races.💥 what are some unpopular opinions you have?I....dont? I cba with discourse lifes too short.☔ would you consider yourself a good person?I think anyone with good intentions is usually a good person so yeah😊 what do you do as hobbies?Sleep, binge watch netflix and blog 😂🎤 whats the last song you hummed or sang by yourself?👏👏👏 Mr Brightside 👏👏👏 what a jam 👏👏👏🐝 whats your worst trait?Being waaayyy too clingy.🌷 whats your mbti personality type and why do you think it suits you?ISFJ and yeah defo, its the defender and I feel that tbh🐶 send me 3 fictional people and ill choose my favourite.Anon?👑 who are your favourite celebrities and why?Kaitlyn Alexander is my bae.Besides that I dont really....obsess over any celebrities? Eliza taylor is doing p good 😂 ummm also some youtubers? Do they count?🐴 opinion on __?Its a great bit of punctuation.🍋 do you consider yourself to be an emotional person?Lmfaoooooo YES📚 share 3 books you love and your favourite quotes from them.M8. Thats not gonna happen 😂 I love any book that makes me cry but I cannot quote a single word.😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? Does it work?Find a quiet corner, shut my eyes and listen to my Depression Playlist. It doesn't always make me feel better but it helps me ride it out.🙂 what thoughts keep you going when you're sad?The thoughts of uni and that I'll hopefully meet some great new people. Also my best friend. Just in general 😂🌎 which country do you live in?England.🐧 describe yourself in 3 words?Awkward, tall and shy.🙉 what quotes changed you?"Pick your fights" bc as much as its a meme it helps me chill outAlso "everything is temporary" and "the sun will rise and we will try again".💭 do you keep a diary?I have a personal blog which acts as a diary yeah💫 who inspires you?Kaitlyn Alexander!! (Listen theyre like the first nb representation I ever knew and I relate so much to everything they say and theyre so cute and talented)👻 do you believe in ghosts and why?I mean, my initial response is no. Because we're just bags of flesh made up of cells and when we die those cells die so theres nothing to live on.But tbh we know so little about the universe I'm open to the possibility of anything at this point.🎀 whats your fashion sense like?Dior. I know what clothes I like and think look good but I never like them on me.🎬 what are some of your favourite films?Deadpool, My sisters keeper, pitch perfect 2 ermm🍦 what is one treasured childhood memory?UmmmmmmmmmmmmWhen I first got my bunny, that was an amazing day!!🐼 if you could meet anyone, who would it be and why?Um my soulmate? Where are they at?

[stan-talent-dont-stan-me]

60 truths tag

Thank you for tagging me @kookmejeon !!

1. Nickname(s): Don’t have any :/ 2. Bias: wHaT iS a BiAs ??? 3. Blood type: i have no clue 4. Relationship status: single but not emotionally stable to mingle 5. Birthday: 26th of January 6. Zodiac sign: Aquarius  7. Pronouns: They/them, but i’m not too fussed, it doesn’t offend me because i’m not too sure about myself at the moment so she/her is fine :) 8. Hair length: V short, a lot of it’s shaved  9. Height: 5′2 and ¾ | 159 cmish, im not sure exactly 10. A crush: I have so many, i have real life crushes, tumblr crushes, celebrity crushes ect. the whole shebang 11. What do you like about yourself: My music taste  12. Right or left handed: Right 13. List of three favourite colours: Black, Sea green and gold 14. Right now eating: Subway cookies, god damn i’m living 15. Right now drinking: Peach water 16. I’m about to: Rewatch Yuri!! on ice bc I’m gay trash 17. Listening to: My Chemical Romance, throwin’ back to the good ol’ emo days 18. Kids: hell no 19. Get married: Idk maybe 20. Recent phone call: My dad  21. Have you ever dated someone twice: Nope 22. Been cheated on: Not that i’m aware of lmao 23. Kissed someone and regretted it: I don’t particularly like the people that I’ve kissed before but I don’t regret it 24. Lost someone special: Yes, but I try not to dwell on it 25. Been depressed: Yes 26. Been drunk and thrown up: No, i only drink at like new year and it’s still not enough to get drunk 27. Had glasses or contacts: When i was like 7 28. Had sex on a first date: No 29. Broken someone’s heart: I hope not 30. Turned someone down: Yes, he was a creepy fucker you can’t blame me lmao 31. Cried when someone died: Yes (applies to both fictional and real life) 32. Fallen for a friend: Current crush ngl 33. In the last year have you made a new friend: I have, i’ve made some really good friends on here recently and i love them all  :) 34. Fallen out of love: Gradually yes 35. Laughed until you cry: Literally yesterday  36. Met someone who changed you: I think everyone i’ve met has changed me, whether giving me a new opinion or perspective on something or on myself 37. Found out who your true friends were: I think so, i have a pretty solid group of friends 38. Found out someone was talking about you: like everyday, everyone hates me, it’s hysterical 39. Lips or eyes: Both wtf, but eyes can be super captivating so idk 40. Hugs or kisses: HUGS ARE AMAZING FTW 41. Shorter or taller: If its if i prefer people being taller than me then yes but it doesn’t bother me too much 42. Romantic or spontaneous: Both i guess, it really depends 43. Sensitive or loud: Depends on the sitch 44. Hookup or relationship: Relationship pls 45. First best friend: She’s moving away in the summer and i’m crying, we’ve only been friends for about a year or so but she’s definitely my best friend 46. Surgery: i had one when i was little to get a hell of a lot of teeth out but that’s it 47. Sports I joined: I used to do a lot but my anxiety stops me from doing team sports/ going to the gym or just being around people in general lmao 48. Do you believe in yourself: It depends on the situation, if i’m confident in my abilities then hell yeah, but if not then probably no 49. Miracles: I was going to quote Hot Chocolate but yeah i believe in them I guess 50. Love at first sight: Personalities matter yo 51. Heaven: idk whats that 52. Do you have any pets: One pupper called Razzie, she’s such a bean 53. Do you want to change your name: Yes and no, I love it because my parents picked it for me but 1) no one can ever pronounce it correctly 2) I hate it and 3) I am having an identity crisis, i have no idea what i want 54. What did you do for your last birthday: Went to Glasgow and just fucked around with my friends, had pizza and a sleepover and it was great 55. What time did you wake up today: 6:20 lmao  56. What were you doing last night at midnight: having an existential crisis 57. Something you can’t wait for: My @ask-kimdaily art to arrive and the preorders for her zine lmao also new Paramore and All Time Low albums  58. Last time you saw your mom: Like two minutes ago  59. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: My crippling anxiety, I wish I had the motivation to help myself but it’s so difficult, I know i have the power to change but   60. What’s getting on your nerves: My lack of motivation and my school work, like who the fuck thought it was a good idea to have exams like who is she

I hope ya’ll learnt a thing or two about me lmao, and enjoyed the shit show

I’d like to tag these lovely people, I’d really like to get to know you all better! @exosmutxoxo @ask-kimdaily @minjinbiased @ahgaseposts @idolized-scenarios @b00bitch @bands–and–fandoms @tae-namjoon @kooks-gf and anyone else who wants to do this, tag me if you do! :) edit: if you've already done this I'm sorry, I meant to post it yesterday but I forgot to, I'm so sorry