How easy it is to do terrible things once you have died. When everything has changed and decayed, and its your own doing. Guilt would eat you alive, so it's very convenient you have died.
You had a choice, and you were so selfish. you thought it was selfless at the time, to stand up against what you were raised in to save the life of your love, to save the fate of the galaxy! This is your purpose, and finally, someone shows you what you must do. And you know what you must do, but it hurts so terribly. Does it hurt more than the loss you have experienced? The isolation and loneliness? Or is it familiar and seductive? You are so tired and fall in quickly and don't try to fight your way out as the dark envelops you.
You hadn't slept much for weeks, losing sleep and gaining stress every night. How easily you were manipulated then! The years of war and turmoil and secrets weighing on your soul, making you question everything. Nobody to turn to, nobody hears you and you dont know how to say what you want to say.
How often you were questioned, harassed, scrutinized, by your own "people". Whether you belonged, whether you did too much, whether you were too dangerous. How the secrets weigh heavy on your soul.
To walk into the temple with your light sword drawn was a terrible thing, but with each step you crush a thing called conscience a bit underfoot until it dies. The last things you feel are horror and disgust as you do the horrible deed you now know is your fate.
You die when you join the Jedi, you die with Shmi. You die over and over again with Padme. You die during the clone wars.
You died with Windu. You died with the first youngling. You died when your Master struck you down. You died when you kneeled to your new Master, in that penthouse where you discovered his terrible secret and his seductive truth. You died and all that was left was hollow.
When padme died, when your children died, the hollow was filled with void. You become the void filling the suit. The suit is empty. You inhabit it, but it envelops you. This is who you are. This was your fate. You are now dead. You are now alive.
Anakin Skywalker, human being, has died. Long live Darth Vader, Lord and faithful servant of the Galactic Empire. This is what remains.
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Okay, the really funny thing about the Annabeth Wayne verse is that at least as of the volume of NTT I'm currently reading (not sure if it got retconned or relocated) ... Dick's Titans team operated in New York City when they were on Earth.
Like.
Olympus was right there.
Camp Half-Blood was right there.
But because Dick doesn't have the necessary context, he would have been searching for Anna in and around Gotham. There wouldn't have been much reason to think that a seven year old would plan to run away to NYC, much less that she would make it there under her own power.
At best, they would have maybe looked into trafficking rings, etc. that might have also operated in NYC, but it wouldn't be the first or most likely place to look.
Long Island? Why on earth would they look there without some kind of sighting or tip? And we know Athena wasn't letting any of those through.
And again, if Bruce or Dick had known to ask, Diana or Donna likely could have told them at least where Olympus was and given them a means of focusing their efforts.
But if they had known to ask, they likely wouldn't have needed to ask at all.
So at some point, Anna (and Luke and Thalia and Grover) would have been in the Titan's city. In Dick's city. Maybe she even knew that and was looking for them as she ran from monsters.
But he wasn't there. Because he was looking for her.
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I requested the Nolan Nico fic but I didn’t expect it to hurt that bad. You’re too good! Thank you!
I have another request please! Something in the vain of people around Jack aren’t always truthful with him, he’s absolved of any criticism and Nico considers himself an enabler too, and so Nico takes a tough love approach this time with their loss that’s so fresh, one person isn’t to blame but one person did make two careless mistakes. I love reading fics where Nico is Jack’s comfort zone but he’s also the captain and I think it would be interesting to read from that pov as well where he doesn’t skirt around being honest for once in their relationship and that inevitably makes them closer.
I'm glad you enjoyed my take of your NolanNico request, I hope this one is up to snuff as well! Took a little different approach, tried to experiment a bit here, so hopefully it works!
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Luke really shouldn't be eavesdropping, but this is Nico and Jack's fault for not doing this at Nico's. If they didn't want him to overhear, they shouldn't have made it so easy for him to overhear.
Plus, this is far too juicy for Luke to be a good person and put his headphones in or blast some music or do the courteous thing and leave the apartment altogether.
When Luke made his swift exit to his room, Jack was looking blankly at one of their walls unthinkingly biting his fingernails while Nico was pacing, his face looking even more troubled than his regular resting face.
"We're a team, Jack."
Luke hears Jack hum.
"No, Jack. We are a team," oh, Luke can hear Nico ramping up to something, Luke gets comfortable, maybe he should have made some popcorn.
"There's nineteen of us out on the ice every game. You don't need to," Nico lets out a big breath, and Luke thinks he hears Nico take a seat, "You can't do this thing where you play like you're the only one that can win it for us."
"Nico, we don't---"
"No, we have to talk about this. I need to talk to you about this." Nico's getting a little louder now. Nico doesn't get loud. Nico speaks and everyone else gets quiet. And Luke can almost picture Jack snapping his mouth shut. Can almost picture Jack's eyes going a little wide, but then getting smaller, a little defiance in them, a little fight maybe.
Its getting testy.
"I know I fucked up, Nico," Jack is grinding this out, even the way he says Nico's name is almost spat out, "We don't have to do a debrief of how I singlehandedly cost us the game."
Luke can tell Jack's gotten up now. He's the one staring down at Nico now. He's the one trying to take control of this conversation, trying to end it.
Nico stays seated though, he doesn't rise to Jack's level, "Can you please listen to me? I need you to listen to me right now." And Luke knows the exact face Nico's making. Its determined, but kind. Its soft, but focused.
Luke hears some shuffling and thinks Jack's probably sat back down. He thinks they're probably facing each other on the couch now.
"You've put the league on notice, Jack. We've all put the league on notice. They weren't expecting us last season and they definitely weren't expecting you."
Luke lets out a soft "ooph" because that takes a lot for Nico to say. Nico's always made it a point to say how Jack's been great from the beginning, how they aren't underdogs.
"They know your game, they spend entire video sessions studying you, probably," Luke hears Nico let out a huff, maybe that was meant to be a laugh.
"You have to be smarter."
"I know." Luke could barely hear that, but Jack sounds resigned, deflated.
"Jack, I'm not asking you to be perfect, but you can't be careless. You see the game like none of us can---"
"Don't sell yourself short, Schao," Luke definitely hears a smile there. And Nico lets out another huff and probably rolls his eyes at Jack.
"The way you see the ice, these mistakes...you shouldn't be making these types of mistakes, okay? The only reason you're making them is because you've gotten it into your head that its all on you. It's not. You gotta stop."
Luke's leg is cramping in the position he's sitting in on the floor next to his door, and he takes that as the sign it is and gets up, grabs his laptop and his headphones.
Nico and Jack are going to be out there for awhile still. There's a lot to get out, a lot to go over.
This is their team, after all. Nico and Jack's team.
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