#not even as a saga creature or in addition to a creature i think just a saga commander would be really neat

[ultraericthered]

So, Majin Buu....

Thinking back on the original Akira Toriyama Dragon Ball run, it's pretty clear to me more than ever that Majin Buu, the final major villain of the series, the Big Bad in the story arc the series ended on, was by far the weakest Big Bad out of all the powerful, action-based Big Bads, making him second weakest overall next to Commander Red. Yes, even Tienshinhan was an overall more satisfactory main antagonist compared to how Buu got by the end. And for the longest time I just sort of took that as a basic truth without really examining why it was. I'd thought the main reason for it was that the concept of him as this ages old evil that was only just now being pulled back into the present day limelight to be the new all-powerful threat to the universe to surpass the last all-powerful threat to the universe was really cheap, as it felt like Toriyama lazily re-doing the premise of King Piccolo only more ancient and a threat to even the gods of this world's cosmology and lore. But if I'm being totally fair and honest, that shouldn't necessarily be a definitive restraint on Buu from reaching villainous greatness. After all, Buu is also a great concept for a villain and an undeniably original, distinguished, uniquely Toriyama one at that. He so easily could've worked. Why didn't he?

This year of Toriyama's passing, it finally dawned on me - Majin Buu suffered from the same syndrome that would years later plague Xehanort from Kingdom Hearts. The syndrome of being a single character yet having so many different variations of him that feel like completely separate characters that makes it hard to reconcile them all as a single entity or to understand who that single entity is at the most fundamental level and what they're all about personally and in terms of narrative function. And indeed, it is only Buu who suffered this problem. Piccolo Jr. felt like the spawn/second lifeline of King Piccolo, Vegeta as a Great Ape still felt like Vegeta, Freeza in all of his transformations still feels like Freeza, Cell is still Cell in all three of his forms (even with his brainpower being more easily expended in the Semi-Perfect form), the Zamasus all feel like different variants of Zamasu, Moro, Mechikabura, and Demigra always feel the same, etc. Yet Majin Buu feels like he becomes four or five different people over the course of his saga, which gets either unnecessarily lengthy or incredibly rushed depending on the medium you're looking at it in!

So here's basically how I feel about the Majin Buus:

Fat Buu, AKA Mr. Buu - Toriyama first created this character to be the Majin Buu, a complete subversion of expectations for how this all-powerful evil demon was built up versus how nonthreatening he appears to be once we meet him. The simple-minded, infantile, playful, whimsical and sweets-craving nature of this Buu is both the source of much comedy and becomes a source of tension that enhances the dread you feel whenever the deep malice he harbors within him comes out on display, as the tonal whiplash of this silly, chubby pink blob getting mad and doing horrible things is unnerving. But in addition, we're made to feel some sympathy for Buu since Babidi treats him in an abusive, exploitative way and it becomes clearer that for all the malice he has and all the wrongs he commits, Buu has the mind of a small child who does whatever he wants to do for fun in total innocence and naivete, not knowing or understanding what the morally right things to do and the right way to live are, and why things like killing other living creatures is morally wrong. The stuff with him and Mr. Satan is some of the best content in the entire saga, and it feels right that he joins the family and becomes one of the good guys in the end, even if not much really comes of that in future installments. I give him an 8/10, to me he's the Best Buu.

Evil Buu, AKA Slim Buu - I mentioned the deep malice within Buu that he was born with, and this guy is the physical personification of it that Fat Buu conjures out from him during a breakdown where his desires are clashing with what he now knows about right and wrong. Visually, he's the exact 180 of Fat Buu - lean face and skeleton-thin body, open eyes that are black with white pupils, dark blue cape rather than a purple one, and he's the only Buu who's not pink but is instead gray. But he's the Mr. Hyde to Fat Buu's Dr. Jekyll, another side of the same person. Were Fat Buu to defeat him, he'd conquer his inner darkness, but instead this thing defeats and swallows Fat Buu, signifying that the inner darkness has won out and will change Buu's shape into something stronger and more evil. Ultimately this Buu has no personality to speak of besides "evil" and is only there as a plot device to up the tension and stakes again by becoming the new eviler version of Majin Buu who has no qualms disregarding the lessons he'd learned from Mr. Satan. However, he does get some extra points for killing Van Zant. 4/10, Basic Buu is Basic.

Super Buu - I really like this Buu yet am really mad at him and have a bone to pick with him. 'Cause he feels so easily like the Buu I'd love the best after Fat Buu, owing a lot to a truly stellar introductory period, solid voicework in the anime, and much like Cell, some cool and catchy theme music from Bruce Faulconer in the US dub. He starts off so cool: popping his neck, yawning, sagging, screaming, and cackling maniacally in the course of seconds after he's formed, showing devastating power and killing Smitty in the most graphic and disturbing way, flying all the way to Kami's Lookout just to fight and kill his enemy, distinguishing himself from the well-spoken likes of Freeza and Perfect Cell by speaking very simply, responding to Piccolo's demand of him by simply and efficiently killing off the Earth's human population, nonchalantly turning a furious Chi Chi into an egg and not even bothering to eat her (he kills her by stepping on the egg), and retaining all of his hilariously childish dumbass qualities and sweet tooth yet possesing a raw, dangerously savvy cunning beneath his brutish exterior. And yet through all this, he it doesn't really feel like he's properly motivated in evildoing other than "he's evil", and more problems start to pile up once he and Gotenks are going at it in the Time Chamber dimention. For every golden moment he gets, he gets some ill-concieved moments (though in fairness, he shares them with Gotenks and Piccolo): it's he who instigates the "wall-breaking/plot-breaking scream". But not even that could ruin him. No, when he really does the unforgivable is when he turns into the next Buu. So he's a 7/10, should've been Buuetter but wasn't.

Mystic Fusion Super Buu - Is just Fusion Super Buu when he absorbs SS3 Gotenks and Piccolo, the "Mystic" is added when he absorbs Gohan. Yeah, the problem is immediately apparent in that premise. Since when could Majin Buu absorb anyone and add their Ki power to himself? That was Cell's shtick, Majin Buu was all about transforming his prey into sweet treats and eating them up. He got the ability to take other fighters and their powers into himself from right out of Toriyama's ass! On top of that, he now looks hideous, with a long head antenna like SS3 Gotenks' long hair, a nose and facial features like Piccolo, and he trades out between Piccolo's, Gotenks', and Gohans' clothes, and neither look good on him! On top of that, his characterization changes as with Piccolo's intellect, he starts speaking in complete sentences and elloquently articulating everything which is just....no. Don't. This is killing Buu's unique vibe! On top of that, him defeating and absorbing Gohan is an utterly cruel slap in the face of any fan who might've actually wanted to see Gohan's ordeals and new power paid off by him being the hero to defeat Buu in the end like such a set-up would normally entail. And on top of all that, he's just a bore now. The whole section of the story where he's around has always failed to interest or excite me, he's just not fun to look at, watch, or listen to, and his existence is what derails Gohan's arc, brings Goku and Vegeta as co-heroes in the spotlight, and stretches things on the barren Earth out longer than necessary, including a gross, unwelcome trip inside of Buu's body! Near the end he loses his shirt and shows his character again, and we get the welcome return of classic Super Buu for one last stand-off, but that only bumps his score to 2/10. Buuuuuuuu, you suck!

Kid Buu - Buu's final and also primal form. He's not only the most powerful, destructive, and maniacal Buu, but this is Majin Buu as originally concieved in-universe. When Bibidi first conjured him into this realm, he was like this - a living, breathing force of pure chaos who lives only for the slaughter and devastation that he finds fun. And he does work as being just that, retaining Buu's mixture of being comical yet also terrifying and dangerous. Almost everything that concerns him and the section in which he's the opponent/obstacle to destroy is perfectly fine, aside from Goku being the hero rather than Gohan and how drained you feel from all the earlier Super Buu antics, it all works and makes for a properly tense, thrilling and epic final battle against a worthy final boss for this saga. The issue with Kid Buu can found within his character set-up and in the way he gets implemented into the saga. We'd been given nothing foreshadowing his existence as the OG Majin Buu until after Super Buu has reverted to him. We had no reason to think that Fat Buu wasn't the default for Buu, nor any reason to think that this new Buu would be that much more powerful than the Buus that preceded him, making Kid Buu feel really, really cheap. For that matter, how does removing Fat Buu from inside of Buu revert him to Kid Buu yet Fat Buu expunging the Evil Buu from out of him didn't have that effect on either Buu? And as is said in this post, "Kid Buu’s defeat doesn’t feel as satisfying as it should because we barely spent time with him compared to Super Buu", and that when Kid Buu comes along to take Super Buu's place, in the manga it's in the last graphic novel volume of the series, the very same that began with Vegito VS Mystic Fusion Super Buu, while in the anime it's the point when "you’re about ready to scream “Oh my Kami, END already!” given how fatigued you are of watching Super Saiyans fighting this pink monstrosity by then. Ultimately, Kid Buu's a 7/10 - Buu Bye and guud riddance, Janemba did it better.

Uub - The reincarnation of Kid Buu, who before getting killed had been Mystic Fusion Super Buu, and Super Buu was previously Evil Buu before eating Fat Buu, who Evil Buu came from making Evil Buu and Fat Buu two different variants of the same being, so that guy gets reincarnated due to a wish to Shenron by Goku even though Mr. Buu is still alive as a separate being....yeah, the dissociative identity of Majin Buu and the flimsy idea of all forms of Buu being the same character really collapses here, and fittingly on a character whose very existence and the reasons for it, in-universe and out of it, are completely nonsensical. If Goku really wanted to keep Majin Buu as a sparring partner but only if he was a better person, why not start training Mr. Buu so that his power could grow to match Kid Buu's? And are we really expected to believe and be okay with the idea that the successor to Son Goku ends up being not Gohan, not Goten, not even Pan, but the hastily introduced in the final two chapters reincarnation of the last villain who we were also only just introduced to in that very volume of manga? I can't pretend to know exactly what Toriyama was going for when he wrote the epilogue in those last two chapters and came up with Uub, but if that was his way of leaving the door open for Toei Animation to continue the franchise on their own terms, it's pretty telling that GT had no interest in picking up on this thread and rendered Uub completely worthless, and we've seen no more from Uub in the DB continuations we've had since. Uub and the ending associated with him were just a total Uuber failure. 1/10.

[niuttuc]

New “budget” Commander cards: Lord of the Rings: Multicolor, part 1

Alright, multicolor will be in two parts. This one first, with everything that ISN'T a legendary creature. Because multicolor cards are more specific in general, I'll also be avoiding cards that are obviously good but go in one very narrow deck, there's plenty of those (particularly legends).

You know these by now, we'll go color by color, mixing main set and commander set. Reprints can be included if they brought the price down under our bar. All the cards presented here are under $2 at time of writing. Cards will be evaluated as part of the 99, even legendary creatures.

I'll start with this card, I've seen very little talk of it, yet it might be one of the generically best new cards in the set. Yes, it's good in prosper, but it's also a four-mana draw four that can flashback for the same price. You can play lands exiled with it and get two turns to do so, so you should be able to use everything. Would it be better if it only played from your deck? Yes, but I don't think it's relevant here, it'll most often be a 6 for 1 draw spell or better once all is said and done.

Aid from the Cowl is often cut from my decks, but this new version comes with quite a few upsides. The creature found gets to act immediately and from the first turn the Doors enters, and the self-contained Scrying makes sure you're much less likely to miss. You can safely ignore the Dwarven and Elven text that's just here for Flavor. If you're playing a heavy creature-based deck in gruul, this is quite a neat addition.

Fact or Fiction is a fun and powerful card. Getting to see one less card is actually quite a downside, it lowers the floor from three cards to two, and this one makes it harder to pick. With that said, it is instant speed and one mana less, and it's always fun, so it's definitely a playable card. Also the Ring exists.

That's a lot of mana to immediately get only a Raise the Alarm. With that said, if you can run through the entire thing, you get a whole lot of power across many bodies, introduce the monarchy and start drawing cards, and if you have valuable humans around (for example, your commander) an indestructible counter is quite valuable.

This Saga is slow, and doesn't do much for a five mana, three colored card, and the mini-insurrection is so telegraphed it's nowhere near as good. With that said, I wanted to include this one for a simple reason: by itself, it tempts you 4 times, allowing you to max your ring with a single card. I don't know why you'd want that but if you do, here's your card.

This is a card more aimed at spikey formats, but if you got a wizard commander (one you want to cast, anyway, looking at you Inalla) or a lot of wizards in your deck, it's an instant speed removal that puts you UP cards, and the floor isn't even that low.

Staying in the realm of Izzet three mana spells that burn, though don't be fooled, this one isn't a removal, it's a wincon. This is the first of these spells that scale to instants and sorceries and the graveyard that can hit face, even if it needs a detour through a creature first. In decks that churn and loot through chunks of their decks often, thinking of something like Rielle, this could realistically deal 10 to 20 damage to the face for 3 mana, and that's quite a bit of value.

Two fliers for 2. In case you needed more Lingering Souls in commander?

Doesn't look like much, but this is a 3-drop that'll redirect attacks away from you without appearing too threatening or giving your opponents HUGE advantages. It won't save you from a late game board that's too tall OR too wide though.

A 1/4 deathtouch is basically impossible to attack into on the ground. Beyond that, it'll immediately start digging through your deck and generating chump blockers and sacrifice fodder. Not much more here, it's just a good card.

This is no Demonic Tutor. This is also 30 cents at the moment, and if you're in Dimir, likely one of the best if not the best tutor, giving you a bit of evasion and a pretty wide tutor as long as you got literally any colored creature out, since the Ring can make it legendary from its base level. I'd probably play this over diabolic tutor in budget decks that are in Dimir and have at least ten creatures or a cheap commander.

Four-mana reanimation isn't GREAT in a world of Reanimates or animate dead, but these days it's quite a decent rate, particularly cleaning out much of the table at the same time. This being able to reanimate ANY PERMANENT for four mana makes it much, much more valuable for decks that can use it though, Golgari is stellar at reanimating creatures and lands, but usually take a detour through the hand and having to pay the mana cost for other permanent types. Have fun reanimating that Party Tree you opened as a box topper or something!

Disrupt Decorum is a popular card, but you usually have to wait an entire turn for everyone to be tapped out and a board wipe can ruin the party. For one more mana, you also get to swing immediately with impunity! And if the board doesn't get wiped, everyone will be mostly tapped out for a second round of beatings. Don't underestimate mass goading.

Volcanic Vision is a powerful but very expensive board wipe. What if you got that, but for creatures, and that brings what you get back directly to the battlefield? I'd be interested in many decks, and since the creature deals the damage, you also get to have fun with lifelink and deathtouch.

Finally, a mention that Talisman of Progress got another reprint, that's two in a row after a long stretch without, and it is helping bring its price down. A few more precon reprints and it'll be a downright budget card!

[straykidsnerd255]

Hello, if it's not too much trouble, can I request a Headcanon that the Y/N of Camus, Saga, Kanon, Mu, Aphrodite and Albafica from SS who is a pokemon trainer and be transported to the universe of SS with his team ? please?🥺🙏

Just a reminder, I only do gender-neutral or female reader. 🙂

Camus:

He’s confused when you appear in his hometown with creatures he has never seen before.

You were surrounded by what looked to be snow-type creatures that seem to do well in the cold weather. 

You seemed to favor a nine-tailed pure white fox as it was a very beautiful creature even in Camus’s eyes. 

“What are these creatures?” Camus asked. 

“They are Pokemon. They are my team. Where am I?” You replied

Camus explained everything to you and you were completely floored. 

However, you and your team made the best of it.

Saga:

You appeared one afternoon with at least 3 creatures waddling behind you.

Saga was curious and went to see if you needed any help or if there was an explanation as to why you suddenly dropped from the sky.

You thanked him for the help before turning to make sure the creatures were alright. 

Saga tilted his head to the side confused. “What are those creatures?” He asked. 

You grinned. “They are my Pokemon. They are kinda like pets but we use them in battles to see who’s Pokemon are the strongest.” You answered. 

You spent the rest of the day teaching your new friend all about your Pokemon and what powers they had.

Kanon:

He was confused when you landed right on top of him. 

Not to mention, he didn’t understand why there were a bunch of creatures that followed you around.

“What are these things? Who are you? How did you get here? Where did you come from?”

You are just too stunned to answer him right away. “First of all, calm down or I can’t answer your questions.” You said. 

Kanon proceeded to close his mouth and wait for you to listen to what you had to tell him. 

You told him about your pokemon and how they are fire type pokemon. You told him about their powers.

Mu:

You had been living with Mu for quite some time now and you finally were comfortable to show your fairy type pokemon to Mu.

He found them interesting and wanted to learn more about them. 

You told him everything that you knew about the pokemon that you had and why you have them.

“They are pretty loyal to the person that catch them but its very clear that you are to treat them like your family.” you said

Mu continued to ask you questions while listening to your answer for each question

He would smile and nod his head to the answers that you give to him

“I think your pokemon will be a useful addition to our team.” Mu said. 

You smiled. “You think so?” You answered.

Mu smiled nodding his head.

Aphrodite:

He was honestly confused. 

You noticed that you were being watched and called out all your pokemon which slightly freaked Aphrodite out a bit

“What are those creatures?” He asked. 

You raised an eyebrow but shrugged it off. “They are pokemon. Fairy Type pokemon to be exact.” You answered.

Every since that day, you and Aphrodite started talking to each other more and more.

Your pokemon even grew attacted to him as well. 

“Your pokemon are so fun to be around. How did you get them?” He asked. 

You told him everything that happened before you got each pokemon.

Albafica:

You appeared in front of Albafica a long time ago and now, you have found comfort in here. Same with your Pokemon. 

“What are those?” He asked, pointing towards your Pokemon

“They are my Pokemon. You can say that they are like an extension of power for me since I don’t have power myself.” You explained. 

“They are also a poison/plant type Pokemon. Plus I am resistant to poison too,” you said, placing your hands on your hips and grinning widely. 

You and Albafica sat and talked for hours and hours.

“Do you plan on staying?” He asked. 

You thought for a moment. “I don’t see the harm in staying for a while. I’m not even sure how I got here.” You said. 

You and Albafica were glued at the hip and did everything together.

[s-creations]

The Forgotten - Chapter 10 'In Which, In Someway, An Ending Is Met'

The BeanBean Kingdom has lived peacefully for centuries, due to the wild ocean and towering mountains that surround them. No one being able to get in or out. Which makes it strange when a stranger enters the kingdom, but not in an expected way.

Close to death and with little memories about his previous life, Peasley has to uncover where this 'L' came from. As well as who would want to hurt this confused human.

Fandom: Super Mario & Related Fandoms Rating: Teen and Up Audiences Relationships: Luigi & Mario (Nintendo), Luigi/Prince Peasley Warnings/Additional Tags: Luigi don't remember who he is, AU to Super Star Saga, There will be mentions of torture, PTSD, Bowser's gonna be intense in this, At least far more than in comparison to the games, Mario's a worried older brother, It's a dangerous game of cat and mouse

“Where is he.” Mario’s voice held an underlying tone of absolute fury. Blue eyes glaring at the towering creature as Bowser descended the throne. 

“He who?” Bowser replied. His smirk grew upon seeing Mario’s clenched fists.

“Where is Luigi, where is my brother!”

“Oh him! Finally worried yourself enough to come running? Honestly, it really took you long enough to get here.”

Peasley tensed as Bowser stood before them fully. Reaching for his sword. Only to pause when Kamek raised his wand in a silent warning. 

“I thought you would rush in so much faster. Seems you do so when Peach is in danger. Perhaps your own flesh and blood just doesn’t hold that much weight. I guess being a ‘great hero’ is a better title  than a ‘good brother’.”

“Where. Is. He.” Mario growled out. 

“He was so sure you were going to break down the doors when he arrived here. At any moment you’d come charging in. I’m impressed with how much spirit Greenie has. It took awhile to break that first wall,” Bowser leaned closer to the glaring face of Mario. 

“But it was worth the wait. Because it was such a joy to watch that light fade from his eyes upon realizing you weren’t right behind him. How long it had been since I had taken him. I truly do think he believes you just left him at one point.”

“And why would he not think that?” Bowser stood straight, starting to pace around the duo now. Peasley doing his best to follow the other’s movement without having to turn. “Always left behind, always forgotten, no one remembering his name-”

“It’s Luigi.” Even Peasley was surprised when his own voice was heard. Training his face straight as Bowser turned to him with a warning growl. 

“I don’t believe I was addressing you, your pea-sized highness.”

“You have a lot of nerve claiming that Luigi’s ‘forgotten’ against Mario when you won’t even say his name. Why should we even listen to a being who finds such pleasure in hurting someone, as if it’s a game. Someone as cold-hearted as you has no right to speak to Mario in such a way.”

It took everything for Peasley to not flinch away as a large fist collided into the ground right next to him. Keeping his glare strong as Bowser leaned dangerously close. The smell of smoke and brimstone suffocating as intense heat hit his face. 

“You are playing a dangerous game, pea prince. I know of your kingdom. Cowards, the lot of you. The moment the outside world becomes too hard, you hide away.”

“I won’t be doing such a thing.”

Bowser laughed, “Then you’ll be the last to hold a backbone. I’ll remove that free of charge.”

“Bowser,” Yellow eyes snapped back to Mario, “Where is Luigi.”

The Koopa King pulled away from Peasley. Without a word, he waves a hand to Kamek, who gives a silent swish with his wand. The air near the magic user seemed to waver until a cage came into view. Peasley felt his heart seeing Luigi resting inside, freely bleeding, broken, and eyes closed. There was a moment of panic thinking that the human was gone. Just barely noticing the small movements of Luigi’s chest rising and falling in staggered breathing. 

“I will admit… It was more enjoyable breaking him the second time.”

Peasley flinched back as Mario’s movement caused a large blast of air to push him to the side. Absolutely shocked by the speed the human displayed. Bowser was apparently ready for this. Able to block the incoming attack with his arm with ease. Pushing back hard enough that Mario was sent flying past Peasley once more, the wind pushing him to the other directly. 

The hero had just barely touched the ground before Bowser was on him. Mario pushed off to the side, avoiding the fist that was now slamming into the ground. Yellow eyes follow close as the human puts more distance between them. Mario’s hand was suddenly holding a large fireball, launching it at the large Koopa. It unfortunately didn’t seem to affect Bowser. But it did provide a distraction to allow Mario to land a solid hit. Able to get enough height to smash both feet onto the top of Bowser’s head. It was shocking that the Koopa appeared more aggravated than hurt after that. 

Peasley’s attention was quickly pulled to his own situation when he was suddenly lifted off the ground. A small yelp of surprise escaped as he was flung to the side. Grunting in pain when his back hit a rock pillar. 

“Keep your awareness around you, your highness,” Kamek cackled, floating above Peasley, “You’re not training anymore.”

The prince didn’t offer a verbal response. Pealey pulled out his sword as his reply, taking a stance. Kamek was less than impressed. 

“Oh, how cute. What do you plan to do with that?” He was not prepared for Peasley to gain elevation by quickly kicking off the same rock pillar. Letting out a yelp of his own, as he swerved to avoid the incoming attack.

The prince rolled to a stop as Kamek scrambled to right himself back onto his broom. Peasley took the opportunity to rush towards the cage. 

“Luigi-” Peasley received a sharp shock when he tried to open the cage. Barely touching the cage before a burn appeared on his gloves. 

“I don’t think so, little prince.” Kamek hissed.

It was the only warning Peasley received before a large, blue-colored orb of energy knocked him to the side. It was his turn to stumble as he seemed to trip over his own feet, causing him to fall back and thankfully avoid another attack. Crawling back a little further as another orb was launched at him, the ground cracking with small chunks of debris flying. Peasley barely felt the cuts appearing on his cheeks and arms.  

“You’re playing a dangerous game.” Kamek growled as a wave of smaller orbs were launched out. Pealsey getting on his feet and quickly darting behind the closest pillar. The ground shook once more from the dodged attack. “Do you really think an unaware primed flower has the ability to stand up against me?”

Taking a deep breath, Peasley darted out from behind his protection. Which unfortunately resulted in running right into another attack. The prince slammed into the ground, holding back a scream of pain as it felt like his skin was melting. When the energy finally dissipated, Peasley tried to sit himself up. 

Only for a leg to be trapped in magic. Peasley clawed at the ground as he was forcefully dragged out of the crater. There was, admittedly, a stupid attempt to hit Kamek with the sword. Which was nothing more than a frantic swiping at the air with the weapon. Kamek practically cackled at this. 

“How pathetic you look. Out of tricks already?”

“Shut up and face me!” Peasley winced as he was swung into the same pillar he’d just used as a barrier. 

“I’m honestly getting secondhand embarrassment from this,” Kamek casually commented. Leaning on the handle of his broom as he watched Peasley struggled to be back up. 

“Get…Get down here…or are you too afraid…” Peasley panted as he took a shaky stance. 

The magic-user cackled again. “Oh, I’m sorry, but I’m not going to accommodate your limited fighting style. Chalk this up to a harsh learning experience. Nothing is better than hands-on training!”

Peasley’s attention was pulled to the ground beneath his feet when it began to glow. His mind quickly shouting at him to move, jumping back. Barely avoiding the sudden wave of jagged spikes. 

“First hard lesson to learn. Magic trumps physical attacks every time!”

The next dodge was slow, Peasley unable to hold back a cry of pain as his left arm was cut. His sword clattering to the ground, the prince holding a hand over the weeping sap that flowed through his fingers. 

Peasley wasn’t fully sure what happened next. There was a sudden burning sensation coming from his hands. One not related to the pain he was just inflicted. As Kamek wound up for another attack, Peasley raised his arms in a rather feeble attempt to provide some form of protection. Unprepared for a wall of thick, heavily throned videos emerging from the rocky ground. Offering the only lively source of green among the black and red. Kamek let out what could only be described as a squeak of surprise. Barley avoiding the newly created vines. 

“What are these! What did you do!” Kamek raged. 

Peasley didn’t respond, eyes still on the swaying vines that seemed to be alive. With all the pressure, fear, and darkness surrounding him, Peasley found warmth. Not of the heat from the lava, but from a source of strength he wasn’t aware he held. A sensation that started from his chest and spread out. 

“...I did what my father taught me!” Peasley shouted back with a wide smile.

The pain forgotten, the prince caught the sword knocked his way by a vine. Swishing it with gusto before jumping onto one of the thicker vines and riding it up. Even with how unprepared Peasley was, the fight was now on an even playing field. Kamek had speed and battle knowledge. Peasley had physical strength, a wild new ability, and a determination not to lose. 

The vines provided the needed coverage when Kamek tried to launch more attacks. Becoming more frantic with each one. Only getting a few more hits in before Peasley was finally getting a leg up. He honestly couldn’t tell if he was getting better or if Kamek was just slipping. But the magic-user eventually tried to teleport away, only to land himself right into one of the newly created vines. Pealsey, more reactive than thinking about what he was doing, moved his hand to have vine wrap around the other. 

Kamek instantly began to struggle as he was drawn closer to Peasley. Only to still when the sword was pointed directly at his throat.

Kamek’s shock soon melted into a smirk. “Well little prince… What do you plan to do now?  Torture me? Kill me?”

Peasley paused, faltered as his eyes traveled over to the small cage. While he couldn’t see Luigi, he knew the human was in there, waiting for him. “No…I’m not going to be like you. I’m going to be better than you. Starting with this piece of friendly advice.”

The prince pulled Kamek closer. Getting a small bump of pride as his glare seemed to cause the magic-user fear. “Never come near Luigi, ever again.”

With a casual flick of the wrist, Kamek was sent flying. Hitting the wall hard, eventually sliding down, crumpling on the floor. Peasley waited for a few seconds to make sure Kamek wouldn’t get back up before going back to Luigi. Stumbling slightly as he jumped down from the vine and onto solid ground, rushing over to the cage. His vines make quick work of the metal bar. Uncaring of the spell that had been placed over it. 

The prince fell to his knees, pulling Luigi closer. Panic rising as the human’s head landed onto his shoulder weakly. 

“Luigi? …If you can hear me, I want you to know you’re going to be okay. I’m here, your brother’s here! …Let’s get you back to the castle-”

Peasley instinctually shielded his body around Luigi when the ground shook. Drawing his sword once more, Pealsey turned, expecting to find Kamek had gotten back up. Only for his bravado to drop as he found that Bowser was now towering over him. The spiked Koopa chuckled at Peasley’s look of fear.

“I believe you have something that belongs to me, little prince.” Bowser growled out. 

Focused on the prince, Bowser wasn’t prepared for the on coming attack. Mario delivers a double kick directly to the side of the Koopa’s face. Sending him spiraling a good distance away. Pealsey was frozen with absolute shock as Mario landed easily beside him. 

Carrying heavy signs of battle damage, Mario turned to Peasley and panted out, “Run.”

“But-”

Both flinched as an enormous roar sounded from Bowser as the Koopa started to stand. 

“I said run!” Mario shouted as he raced head long into confronting Bowser once more. 

Finding what must be his forth wind, Peasley cradled Luigi close and made for the door. Ignoring the sounds of battle and destruction. Avoiding pieces of debris, no matter how small or large. Pushing past his burning lungs and exhausted body. Claiming a small victory when he passed the double door and into the view of a red sky.

Even then, Peasley didn’t stop running.

He more or less collapsed onto his flying steed, who had already been waiting for him. Which was good, because Peasley doubted he could call out for any reason at this point. Arms shaking, still holding Luigi close, they slowly descended. Past the black clouds, over the large battle field. 

Against Peasley’s better judgment, he drew his eyes down to the fight below them. Even with the lower numbers, it appeared the BeanBean Kingdom was holding their own well. Able to push back, but not without a few casualties of their own. At the front, still leading strong, was Queen Bean. Her strength and power seemed to have no end as she knocked enemies away with such ease.

Peasley jerked back to awareness upon realizing he’d been close to falling off. His vision became blurry as the castle finally came into view. A stinging sensation alerted Peasley to his still bleeding arm. There should have been a spike of worry upon seeing the cuts outlined in deep purple. The sap’s color had become a sickly looking green instead of its golden amber. Peasley unhelpfully remembers that’s where Kamek’s spikes had hit him. 

“Huh…that’s not good…” Peasley commented weakly.

The ground was suddenly a lot closer than he remembered. Unable to keep his strength and released Luigi. Both sprawling out onto the ground at the castle entrance. With the last moments of clarity, Peasley turned back to his flying stead. Who had started fluttering around nervously.

“Go back… Go get…Mario…” The stead gave a short bounce, a nod in understanding, before darting back into the sky. Back to where the fortress was. 

Peasley was out before Dr. Pinto and the rest of the medical team came running out. Both he and Luigi were unresponsive as they were carried in. Both were unaware when Bowser’s fortress started to crack and crumble, a terrible sound echoing through the sky as parts started falling away. Both were unaware when the BeanBean Kingdom cheers were deafening as the invading army started to flee.

_____________________________

Mario couldn’t help but feel absolutely relieved when Peaslsey was able to make it out. Luigi in his arms. The drop in attention allowed Bowser to land a sucker punch. Mario scrambled to stop himself quickly.

“Do you really think this is it?” Bowser growled out, “That it’ll just end here? You’re playing all your cards right now and it’s working out perfectly for me…”

Dodging out of the way of another punch, Mario only had a few seconds to take cover behind a large chunk of debris. The hero wincing Bowser’s claws scraped against it. Taking a chance, Mario vaulted over his coverage. Landing a hard kick to the Koopa’s already bruised jaw. That didn’t stop Bowser from spewing a heavy steam of fire. 

Mario held back a yell of pain as his left arm took the full hit of the attack. Ducking behind another pillar and quickly pulled out a Super Mushroom. Taking a small bite to recover from the heavy damage. Stepping out once he felt slightly better, Mario stepped back out, holding a defense position as Bowser stared him down

“Do you know how pathetic that coward sounded?” Both parties took a pause to glare at the other. Bowser smirked seeing the rage and frustration fully open on Mario’s face. “He cried, begged, for you every night. But did you come? No, the poor fellow had to get himself out. Because you just weren’t good enough.” 

Bowser quickly raised his arms to block the fireballs. Doubling over when a kick landed on his stomach. Swiping out, stratified when his claws landed on Mario’s back. Mentally touting that the brothers would have scars to share now. 

“He remembers me,” Bowser choked out a weak laugh, “He remembers everything I did to him. I’m sure you were told… I did so much damage, he’d actually forgotten. A few blissful months of confusion as he recovered. I am the nightmares that I’m sure he never wants to remember, but he does!”

Mario held a hand over his side that the claws had reached. Glaring as Bowser’s laugh grew to a triumphant sound.

“He remembers me, but he doesn’t remember you.”

That felt like a knife of ice had been plunged into his heart. Mario’s eyes widened in disbelief, in pain, as Bowser continued to laugh.

“How does it feel? Greenie’s going to give his last breath knowing the pain and suffering he had to live through. Know my name, face, and voice. Know that he was abandoned. But he won’t remember you.”

It wasn’t rage that took over. As Mario stood to fully face the still laughing Bowser, the sour feeling in his gut was fear. Heart thudding painfully, the sound soon drowning out the taunting laughter. Fist clenched tightly, Mario’s eyes narrowed on the Koopa, who was now knelt over. Still laughing. Seeming to be uncaring as the hero stalked closer. 

Bowser uncaring as he was forcefully pulled further down. Finally acknowledging the pale faced Mario. 

“Don’t you dare come near Luigi, ever again. Or I will-”

“What, kill me?” Bowser smirk grew, “I thought Princess Peach would have trained her lap dog better. Besides…you don’t have to worry about your brother anymore.”

The punch that was delivered was the final. The Koopa flew across the room, landing hard and he didn’t get back up. Coming down from the swirling emotions, Mario was first aware that his fist was throbbing in pain. Possibly broken with how hard it was to move. But he couldn’t worry about that right now. The next thing he noticed was that he was crying. Cheeks were cooled slightly as they ran down. The final part was deciding to bring the place down.

Reaching into the bag that was still surprisingly intact, Mario pulled out a blue and white flower. Crushing it and shivering weakly at the chilling sensation that traveled through his body. Walking to the nearest crack in the foundation, Mario aimed and casted a blast of ice downwards. The fortress immediately began to sound its protest. A few pieces start to shatter and fall away from the sudden chill. Cracks spread as the pouring lava hardened. 

Mario only stopped when the power ran out. The crack he was standing over now outlined with a thick layer of ice. He didn’t allow the ice to settle for long before activating his firehand. Landing a few fireballs before the fortress started to break apart, he headed for the exit. He paid no mind to the part that seemed to explode around him. Uncaring as the ground became uneven, stumbling slightly as he was greeted with a fading red sky. The blue starting to return. 

The heavy smoke started to dissipate. Allowing Mario to see how high he truly was. The BeanBean citizens were cheering as Bowser’s army fled. No doubt seeing their king’s castle crumbling as a call of loss. Deciding to retreat as an easy end. 

The hero let out a sigh as his focus tilted back up to the sky, which had fully cleared. He really didn’t have a plan for getting down. He should. But he didn’t. Mario didn’t panic as the wind started to howl in his ears. Or when his feet lost the feeling of solid ground. He knew he should be panicking. But at that moment, Mario just felt…numb.

So he was more than a little surprised when something soft collided into his back. Causing Mario to wave his arms to panic balance at the sudden change in directions. Being pushed up into the sky once more. Gathering his bearings in understanding that he needed to sit up, the hero realized he was sitting on a familiar flying bean. Said creature now makes a direct line to the castle.

It still felt like Mario was falling.

Mario stumbled when he eventually climbed off the creature. Not really taking anything in as the BeanBean citizens rushed past him.  Mario having no drive or focus on the moment. So there he stood as the world moved around him.

He became grounded when someone placed a hand on his shoulder. A little surprised to find Queen Bean standing next to him. She was carrying her own battle scars, looked exhausted, and had her shoulders drooped down with unseen burden.

“They’re in the infirmary.” Was all she said.

But Mario knew who she was talking about. Peasley and Luigi. He merely nodded in acknowledgement, allowing Queen Bean to steer him into the castle proper. He paid no mind to the destroyed splendor or the many beings inside that lined the halls. He heard none of the conversations, the cries of loss, the panic of what was to happen next.

It was only as they entered the medical wing did Mario feel something. His dry eyes immediately landed on Luigi. Asleep, unmoving, both legs already placed in casts, covered with a few blankets.

The fear returned. 

He’s aware that he’s pushing past a number of people. A few even called out ‘Sir, we need to check you over!’, but he didn’t stop. Mario’s hand claimed Luigi’s uninjured one the moment the sleeping form was in reach. The other hand came up to gently cup the younger brother’s cheek. There was a bit of relief felt when there wasn’t the chill as Mario had been fearing.

It didn’t erase the weight of failure that rested on his back. He’d almost lost his brother, twice, because he was too slow. Luigi was suffering. Luigi didn’t remember him. Had Mario failed that severely?

“He’ll be fine.” Eyes quickly darted up to Dr. Pinto standing on the other side of the bed.

“...H-He’ll live?” Mario choked out.

Dr. Pinto smiled and nodded. “He’ll live. You got him back just in time.”

And the last barrier crumbled away.

Mario was staring the doctor down when the tears started to fall. The next second he was sobbing, wailing, releasing the pent up fear, anger, and exhaustion that had built up this entire time. Pressing Luigi’s hand to his cheek as he choked out words from a language none in the room understood.

Queen Bean allowed her own tears to fall silently as she stood over her son. Her eyes on his peaceful face that contrasted so severely to his blackened arm. 

The hall was filled with Mario’s begs for forgiveness he knew he didn’t deserve.

[overseer2020]

Just Disastrous

19 -- January 2024

I just looked over what I've written so far and realized I haven't yet mentioned Disasters. You see, superheroes don't just fight crime, they often find themselves saving innocent victims from natual disasters (and deal with governmental authorities, but we've already talked about the Lawbringers).

For my project (I keep wanting to say "set"), Disasters are mythic rare Sagas that don't go away as long as someone is in peril. Originally, they were simple enchantments with their functionality spelled out in so many words that I chose to use the Big Text frame in Magic Set Editor to fit it all in. After all I was already going to use that frame for the big, complicated Schemes I originally envisioned, but more about those later.

Much like Skills, Disasters were an early idea that went through many iterations before landing where they are today. Part 2 Disasters will be a little different, and if they appear in part 3, I think I have yet another treatment for them there, too. It's one of the reasons I knew I would have to split the project up into separate sets -- some of my ideas clashed with others if they had to exist together in the same set.

A Disaster in Part 1 will put "peril counters" on each eligible permanent and grant the power to remove them to heroes and creatures with one of two specific keyword abilities. For example, Aerial Disaster (think plane crash), heroes and creatures with flying or vigilance can be tapped to remove a peril counter from something. This is important to do because permanents with peril counters on them will have something bad happen every (other) turn until there aren't any peril counters left.

I came up with the idea of disasters BEFORE SAGAS EVEN EXISTED. That's how long I've been at this, I'm embarrassed to report. When I saw their potential for storytelling in this project revolving around a story-telling medium (comics), I resisted a bit because I thought I would have to give up too much control with the way Sagas generally work. But then, tweaks like read-ahead and transformational Sagas opened my eyes to the possibilities. (My Saga-Disasters remove their own lore counters if peril counters still exist.)

Oh, and everyone will be affected by Disasters, not just the opponent's stuff; I intend for weilding Disasters to be dangerous. Some Disasters get more dangerous with each loop through the use of doom counters that aren't removed on each loop. Disasters are also legendary in addition to being mythic and expensive. This keeps them rare in Limited and less-than-obnoxious in Constructed. I've since reduced the expense, but in the grand scheme, they're still an investment.

[translationandbetrayals]

My experience playing Ni no kuni II: Revenant Kingdom

Ni no Kuni is a saga of 7 role-playing video games, published by level-5, since 2010 until the most recent one released this year. Each game follows the story of a specific character and combat strategies differ depending on the game, however in all games the characters' abilities are magical, and along the way of each adventure we can have as companions some creatures called imajinn that we must fight and then tame to be useful in times of battle.

While until now each game allows us to embody certain characters with different purposes, there are many ideas and factors that are maintained although the story is different, for example, the quests are present in all games and allow the player to advance in the story, that personally I found  kind of pointless, at least in some of the games. Also, in the 7 games you can distinguish this idea that we can travel between worlds, there is the magical world and the "real" world which would be the place of origin of the character depending on the game, and regarding the scenery, players have total freedom of movement and therefore you can go anywhere you find attractive and "talk" with the inhabitants you find.

  Ni no kuni II: Revenant Kingdom

The story is based on the life of a boy named Evan who is heir to the kingdom Rattlesnake, a place where all the citizens have cat ears. The break in the story occurs on the day of Evan's coronation in which a sort of "coup d'état" takes place, leaving Evan with the only option to escape. We later meet a character named Roland that we can control in the game, who appears in Evan's world, and helps him escape from the kingdom.

The aim of the game is to achieve the construction of a new kingdom where everyone can be at peace, and to do so we must complete quests, negotiate between kingdoms and with the citizens. (it is not necessary to have played Ni no kuni I to be able to understand the game, because the story is different.)

Personally I think that the animation in general, especially that of the different spaces that we go through during the game, has the beauty that characterizes the game series even if it has not been animated by studio Ghibli as in the other games, but it still has the beauty that characterizes the game series, however in Ni no kuni II we have a new form of battle, The "skirmish battle", which honestly I do not like at all, the animation lowers its quality a lot, both in the characters that are Chibi style, as in the environment surrounding the fight, although the commands in this style of fight are really simple to carry out. On the other hand, the first-person combat is much better compared to the other games, even compared to the latest version, Ni no Kuni: Crossworlds, this is because in Ni no Kuni II the combat system in which we have to wait to be able to perform some movements was modified to a "real-time system" that I consider much more comfortable and allows us to perform the movements that we consider convenient at any second of the combat, without having to select any specific action, we also have the possibility of equipping the character with 3 different short-range weapons and 1 long-range with which we can launch simple attacks or wait until they are fully charged to perform a special move. With the new system we can make the use of weapons in combat enter automatic or semi-automatic mode by creating a sequence of attacks with the weapon that is more "loaded", but at any time we can return to manual mode. Among other settings such as changing character or using imajinn is very easy to carry out, making the confrontations are not as long but just as fun. I think what I like most about the game is the animation in combat, because despite not being animated by studio ghibli retains the same aesthetics of the characters and the magical effects of the abilities that go with their respective weapon. In addition, due to the context of the game we can create kingdoms from 0 and manage the resources it has. Finally, what caught my attention of this game is the complex development of each place we visit in the game, both at the level of animation as well as the different political, architectural, moral systems of each kingdom and with this I think it is possible to raise an indirect criticism of certain concepts that we observe in each kingdom.

Consuelo Aliaga

[lovely-v]

LOTR (films) Review

So I finally watched the LOTR films (20 years later). I’m super excited to review these because I read the books very recently so I feel at least a little prepared to voice some opinions. Overall I loved the films, here’s a very long (but by no means exhaustive) compilation of my thoughts, which are of course, totally subjective:

(Warning: a lot of me saying “well, actually, in the book...”)

THINGS I LIKED

- Casting! not much to say here, I thought the casting was great. One of my favorite actors that I didn’t think i’d have a huge opinion on was David Wenham as Faramir. I was kinda ambivalent on him when I saw pictures but i thought he did a great job. he showed his quality.

- Music. so much has been said about the films on the music front. I can’t offer too much original insight but when a bit of the Shire theme started to play as Frodo tries to make his way up Mount Doom I cried a little.

- Boromir and Aragorn. I liked the scene where they interact a little in Rivendell. I also like how Aragorn saves Boromir in the Moria battle and gives him this little nod of friendship. I think the films did a great job portraying the dynamic they have where Aragorn is clearly suspicious of Boromir’s motivations but grows to respect him to the point where he doesn’t even blame Boromir for being corrupted by the ring because he understands that, at heart, Boromir is a good person. 

- Sam and Frodo in Osgiliath. I expected to be kind of annoyed with the way this plot point played out (I knew ahead of time that it strayed from the book), but I actually liked it a lot. As I’ll say later, there’s some gripes I have with the way the films extremely play up the disagreements between Frodo and Sam, but I loved the scene where Frodo pulls the sword on Sam and then seems so defeated when he realizes what he’s done. I was pleasantly surprised by how emotional this scene made me. It’s admittedly A Lot, but it was done nicely, especially in conjunction with Sam’s “there’s good in this world” speech.

- Treatment of the ending. I almost think I should dislike the ending as it is in the movies, but my heart is soft and I like that they sugarcoated it a bit. I know the whole point of the Scouring of the Shire and Frodo’s depression conveys a lot about war and trauma and I think that is important, but after watching these things for twelve hours I just wanted Frodo & co. to be happy and I was kinda relieved that they cut the Scouring. Does that make me weak and perhaps bad at film analysis? yes. do I care? no. I was also very glad that the movies didn’t portray how depressed Sam was about losing Frodo in the end. Yes, he cries, but when he walks home to his family he seems happy and in the books that scene came off so much bleaker. I definitely liked the lighter tone.

THINGS I WAS NEUTRAL ON/DIDN’T LIKE

- Arwen. (Neutral) I don’t hate her, I don’t love her. I think the story she and Aragorn have is compelling and I 100% get why the filmmakers decided to add it to give her character more depth, but it felt misplaced at times. maybe it’s just because it was the only storyline I didn’t know in depth, but the scenes with the Arwen/Aragorn flashbacks felt a bit confusing and disorienting. Don’t have anything against Arwen as a character though, I think she’s pretty alright.

- Gimli. (Complicated thoughts) I want to start off by saying I don’t dislike Gimli. I like him a lot! I just think the movies did him a bit dirty. He had some good movie-exclusive moments, but I think his character really fell into this place of being the butt of too many jokes. Would have liked to see some more serious Gimli development, especially with his relationship to Legolas. Their friendship felt too much like subtext here, whereas it’s explored far more in the books.

- Two Towers Pacing. (Didn’t really like). The pacing of TTT was...weird. maybe I’m going into this with a closed mind because of the books, but it was odd to have the movie begin with Frodo and Sam and then have them only appear for a few rapid scenes after that. I think the fact that a WHOLE LOT of what happens to Frodo and Sam in TTT is moved to RotK is what makes it feel that way? In the books, Two Towers ends with Sam discovering that Frodo isn’t dead from Shelob’s sting, and I was surprised by how long it took the movies to get to that part. However, I will give the films a little leeway because I think they needed Frodo & Sam content for RotK, since most of what happens in that book is them walking through Mordor basically starving and dying. Doesn’t make for great cinema I guess, so they had to put the whole Shelob/Cirith Ungol saga into the final film. Still, I think there’s a weird lack of Frodo and Sam’s presence in TTT.

- The go home/missing bread arc. (Full of rage abt this one) yeah. so. my criticism of this is gonna sound pretty tired because people complain and complain about this part of RotK. but I’m gonna complain some more!! I don’t think the split between Frodo and Sam does anything for the plot. I really don’t. I guess it emphasizes the fact that Sam doesn’t understand how much Frodo is projecting onto Gollum, but it’s just. unnecessary angst? They had enough angst in the Osgiliath scene! Which I actually liked! And it simply doesn’t make a lot of sense for Frodo to suspect Sam of eating the bread when Sam had already offered Frodo his own food and made it clear that he would very much starve if it meant making sure Frodo could eat. But what I hate most about this scene is not that Frodo gets mad and tells Sam to go home. No. It’s that Sam actually... thinks about doing that? he actually? goes down the staircase? emotionally this is bad because Sam clearly cared enough about Frodo to follow him this far, to nearly drown for him, so why would he leave now. Practically this is bad because 1. how would Sam get out of Mordor alone and 2. where would he go. He turns around almost immediately, yes, but what was his plan. where was he going. why.

THINGS I LOVED

- For Frodo! This line, and every other shoutout to Frodo. In the books, they didn’t really actively talk about/worry about Frodo (and Sam) as much as they do in the movies. I like that they talk about Frodo more in the movies! I like that they’re thinking about him! I know it was implied that they were in the books, but I really like how it’s shown here. I think it gave a more complete picture of how much they all care about him on a personal level in addition to just needing him to succeed from a pragmatic standpoint. 

- Merry and Pippin! I feel like Merry and Pippin were so well rounded in the films. I’ve heard criticism about them being turned into comic relief characters (which they always were a little bit) but it honestly didn’t feel that way to me. They had a bit of a rough start because the films didn’t make their motives for going with Frodo as deep as the books did, but I think that by TTT they were absolutely amazing characters in every scene. In RotK their respective arcs hit really well and the scene where Pippin is singing to Denethor? *chef’s kiss* poetic. beautiful. sad. idk man I just feel like I have such a newfound appreciation for Merry and Pippin.

- Parallels! people have pointed out the parallel of Frodo and Sam’s hands before (drowning scene/mount doom scene) and I love how the movie did that. Just stunning. Also! The moving of the Smeagol & Deagol scene to RotK surprised me because in the books it was like,,,at the beginning of Fellowship, but I think the placement of it in the movies really helped emphasize the similarities between Smeagol & Deagol and Frodo & Sam (and how much Frodo fears this similarity.) There were a lot of other well done parallels between storylines and a few bits of dialogue that were repeated with great timing, but I can’t remember all of them at the moment.  

Edit: here’s one I remembered! when Frodo wakes up after being rescued and sees Gandalf, he says Gandalf’s name in a very similar tone to the one he used at the very beginning of Fellowship. It was a nice little subtle connection.

- I can’t carry it for you...alright this is self-indulgent. everyone knows I love this line. I’m just so glad it made it into the movie intact. Sean Astin’s delivery was amazing. I cheered. My mom cheered. It’s a raw line and it makes me feel secret emotions...like if shrimp colors were feelings. that line makes me feel shrimp feelings. idk i’m so tired i just watched twelve hours of movies this review is decreasing in quality by the minute but i’m about done for now anyway

Various silly afterthoughts

- I would have liked to see Sam kiss Frodo’s hands at least once. This happens 50 thousand times in the books, they could have given me one scene. one little extended edition scene. Please Peter Jackson I’m dyin’ out here

- They literally made Gollum so hateable. kinda the point yes, but I was so on board with Sam’s murderous rage. I know why Gollum’s a profoundly complex character, I know why Frodo pities him, I know why murder is bad, but I too would throw hands with that creature. also he literally body shamed Sam so much what was that skdjksdjksd. Sam is lovely. let him commit a small homicide. 

- the scene where merry and pippin drink the tall boy juice (as someone once referred to it in the tags of one of my posts)... not accurate to the books (since they don’t ever drink it with the end goal of getting tall) but so accurate to life. if I found some water that made me taller than my friends? let me at it

- Frodo panicking when he falls into the spider webs. so real bestie. i felt just as panicked watching that. i am terrified of spiders and Elijah Wood did an amazing job doing exactly what i’d do in the situation. yelping a lot and falling down.

- I feel like it’s never stated that Sam’s a gardener (or at least that he’s specifically Frodo’s gardener) until he tells Faramir he is. Did I miss this. Or do they really never say.  are you just meant to know. are you just meant to pick up gardener vibes from him.

*

This has been a very chaotic lotr movie review. Thanks for reading.

[danwhobrowses]

Castlevania Season 4 - My Thoughts

So we return, for the end Well, the 'end', there's possibility for expanded universe stories they say but for our current trio this is how we finish it

I've just binged it all so it's fresh in the mind, so I'm gonna look at the ups and downs of it all

You can also look at my review of season 3 if you'd like

Spoilers for Season 4, Watch it and get back here

So yeah, another great season, it had its downs but a lot of it had its ups too, which we will get to soon - but first let's get the negatives out of the way

What wasn't so good Nothing is perfect, and while a lot of these will be negatives they are mostly small negatives, stuff I felt could've been done a little bit better.

Saint Germain's heel turn could've been hidden So Saint Germain turning bad under the deception of death was a good way to establish conflict and pull back the rebus thing he mentioned in Season 3. But I kinda wish we didn't immediately know that he had broke bad, like we could've been super sly and coy about the fact that he's back and this time encountering Alucard only to be the orchestrator, like imagine the shock we could've had with learning what he was doing in the Castle then getting the flashback which drove him to it.

The rules of the ring change Last season Hector made the foolish decision of trusting Lenore, and while he got to bed a sexy vampire it had cost him all his freedom and the ring would prevent Hector acting against the coven of four sisters. But come this season it turns out that Hector was easily able to scheme against the sisters and invite the downfall of Camilla. Was a bit weird to establish that last season only to ignore it in the next.

The Patented Slow Start Castlevania has had a bit of a knack for starting slowly and Season 4 kinda did the same, things only really kicked off halfway through. Now of course we had to establish things; Trevor and Sypha being exhausted, the plans to resurrect Dracula, Alucard taking in the village and whatnot but we did linger on it a bit too much.

Striga's 'Day Armor' doesn't get enough time Striga took an ambush like a champ with a specialized armor that allowed her to fight in daylight. It was awesome and striking and looked absolutely badass...but that's the only time we saw it. It was just a shame really, granted it ended up that this was Striga's only time to fight, but we could've then used it for other characters, like the ambush dude who had his armor picked apart by the trio, or the Slavic vampire, just felt we could've done more with it.

CGI is sometimes a little shoddy The animation quality was mostly excellent, but that made it very glaring when some of the 3D rendering kinda hit an uncanny valley. I think the one that was most iffy was when Varney jumped into the mirror and then the mirror fragments just kinda wiped into the ground - even though Isaac's mirror tore a hole in the air - it was just a bit off-putting at times.

Couple of things left behind So when we ended it felt like we wrapped a lot of things up...except 2 things. One, where is Saint Germain's unnamed kickass lover? We caught her silhouette just walk away so we know she wasn't killed by Death, she's just 'out there' now. We also never got back to Targoviste, whose survivors must be wondering how to function since Sypha their only hope kinda disappeared on them, they'll also learn that their royals are dead, so it would've been nice to wrap that up.

Our heroes decide to use weapons sparingly In terms of arsenal we knew that our trio had a lot. The weird thing is that in some fights they just wouldn't use what would've been handy to them. There's of course Chekov's god dagger - which we didn't get too much explaining on - but Trevor would often just not use his Morningstar or Vampire Killer at times, even against two vampires, Sypha also seems to have forgotten how to use her wind magic or used her ice buzzsaw extremely sparingly and now Alucard can suddenly have bird wings...which could've been useful in prior fights.

We still lacked intelligent Night Creatures, and the badass vampires were underused So I still feel like it was very missed that the sentient night creatures of Season 1 didn't return still, especially since they were death's creatures. The one's dialogue with the priest is still among Castlevania's best and it's a shame we missed out on seeing more of it. In addition, the Ambusher's squad of vampires looked pretty cool, but like Dracula's council ended up just being swatted away after one fight, the same can be said with the Slavic vampire that was rolling with Varney. They didn't even get the pre-battle slaughter that Dracula's council did, Godbrand got more than these guys and that's a shame.

We don't get Bloody Tears or the Full Opening So the music was good, but we didn't get Bloody Tears again. For the final chapter of this saga it would've been better than using the opening song when the trio were together. Speaking of the opening song, we could've had the full length opening that we loved to see, small stuff but it would've elevated it.

Sypha is pregnant, because...because! So Sypha being pregnant is sweet, but it wasn't really needed aside from the throwaway 'trefor' joke which Alucard did better. Also that baby has gone through a lot, it's not like Sypha's been skipping in a meadow these past few weeks. Also they really gloss over how Trevor knows this and she doesn't

Some of this could've been done in a Season 5 This is more the fault of Netflix I'm guessing, since it does feel like after Season 3 we had much more to tell, but it did feel like some of the characters skipped a load of development. At the end of Season 3, Hector was beside himself in the fact that Lenore enslaved him, Isaac was still very bent on killing everything, Camilla is soaking in her genius and Alucard is more closed off than ever, but in Season 4 Hector is much more content and now has some legitimate connection to Lenore, Lenore is treated as sympathetic, Isaac is eating berries with a new outlook and Alucard decides to rescue a village because they asked, also he has a shield now. It does feel like half of what Season 4 had could've been in a Season 5, and then Season 4 could've built between having the growth be showed; Lenore feeling left out and confiding in Hector, Isaac deciding to bury the dead and rebuild the city, Trevor and Sypha having some friction in their relationship and Alucard not helping someone in need and then regretting it. As I said, this is probably not the show's fault, they were likely told that Season 4 would be it and they had to make do with it but in a vacuum it would've been nice to have had a little more build.

What was Awesome about it So I could easily just say 'the rest of it' but I guess I can afford to be a little more detailed.

Great Animation Aside from the CGI at times the animation was a top grade of excellence. I mean I watched the current My Hero Academia episode which really was pushing its budget and still I'm impressed by this animation, the artwork and settings were excellent too.

Downside: You're turning into Trevor, Upside: You get a strong warrior woman as a love interest While Alucard could've used some more time to go from emotionally scarred by 'the twins' to sympathizing with the town's plight, his character dynamic with Greta was great. Greta herself proved an excellent late addition being both a capable fighter, a strong independent leader and someone who was more than just an Alucard love interest. If you don't like strong women you're doing it wrong basically, and Alucard realising how he's turning into Trevor was some lightheartedness to Alucard combatting his loneliness and depression.

The Dialogue remains just as enthralling as the combat One of Castlevania's great strengths especially in seasons 1 and 3 were their use of gripping dialogue, the philosophical confrontations of different parties envelop the characters in greater depth thanks to the excellent script, primarily for Isaac and his chat with the bug man. The Slav Vampire also had a fantastic monologue.

Characters remain complex After four seasons it would've been easy to make some characters one dimensional, including the side villains, but Castlevania kept with the morally grey. The psycho noble clung hard to her delusions but her motives remained pure, as much as she was someone on the heroes' side she also infuriated Sypha, Saint Germain was driven to evil out of desperation but he still believably made amends in the very very end, Striga, Lenore and Morana were all on the side of the villains but had doubt about the scope of Camilla's ambition and made them consider their very nature. Simply put, it bodes well when characters have struggles that affect their motivation.

Layered Scheming 'Bring Back Dracula' was a simple premise, but the show did really well in connecting the channels between 3 plot areas, Trevor and Sypha learned of the plot by continually walking into scholar vampires attempt it, in Season 3 it was via a Night Creature in Isaac's name to start it all too, this connects to the Hector & Isaac story through Varney who schemes with the former to enact the plan, but this also connects to Alucard's story thanks to Saint Germain also plotting too. It was a clever way to entwine all three separate stories which would eventually bring things together.

Action still kicks a lot of ass Castlevania has good action? In other news water makes things wet. But still we got some great brutal action we've come familiar with in Castlevania. It could've been easy to go overboard like other shows had, which'd zone in on one thing like gore or nudity but Castlevania remained consistent in their action, looking for new lengths of creativity that never pushed its bounds. Of course building up to the final battle where we took it up a notch for the crescendo. Also I continue to call her Sypha 'Fatality' Belnades because god she kicks ass.

Isaac and Hector grow up It could've been easy and satisfying for Isaac to just roll up to Styria, take his revenge on Hector and leave, acting in both anger and mercy. But instead the characters grew beyond it, Isaac finally decides to heed what the shopkeeper and ship captain were saying rather than the crazy witch, Hector accepts his fate but works to try and make amends his own way. When the two finally cross again we see that both have accepted their humanity and instead of working for someone else they look to seek their own happiness, they forgive humanity in a way and it saves themselves. Their understanding to 'let Dracula rest' also grants them payoff from being Dracula's loyal commanders.

Camilla goes out swinging Where was this Camilla hiding huh? Brutal, Lightning powers and a crimson sword, I mean the wardrobe seems to be a bit less than last season and not battle-suited but dammit did Camilla grip you in her scenes. Her desperation and madness in taking over the world set her up to her downfall where she was betrayed and overwhelmed by Isaac's forces, but rather than let him have the satisfaction she kills herself. It could've easily fell flat because Camilla had just been sitting around like a vampire Cersei Lannister last season and end up proving her frustrations right by having a man take her life but instead she took control of her life and went out strong.

The bittersweet ending of Lenore At the end of season 3 the scheming Lenore claimed herself 'the diplomat', but having been shelved and fonder of Hector than usual it opened the door to explore her own grasp of control. The theme of enduring being prominent in this season for all the arcs we had. We learned the tragedy of Lenore's situation though, as a child of war diplomacy was her escape, she isn't comfortable with peace or total control, she can only live for conflict. While she does like Hector, she ends up valuing her own freedom in the end; and though we could've given more time to earn that sympathy we still accept it as she decides against a quiet life of surveillance freedom with Hector - ironically as Hector has lived under Camilla's captivity - and instead chose death. It was a much more poetic death than gruesome as well, after mulling how she mourned her sister because she understood the nature of greed she elected to make a choice rather than live without making any, looking at the sun for once and getting one last banter with Hector before immediately fading to dust. In a show that almost prides itself on hypergore and graphic deaths, this one was perhaps the most tranquil deaths of the show.

Striga and Morana overcome the greed Which leads to the final two of the four sisters. Camilla consumed herself with greed and died fighting for it, Lenore had no greed but also had no freedom so chose to die in order to be free, but lovers Striga and Morana were not in Styria for Isaac's attack, they were on the outskirts fighting and seeing the struggle firsthand. Their conflict over how they agreed and disagreed on certain aspects of the fight was intriguing, with the intermission of Striga on a tear in her swanky armour to tilt the tone to Striga's side of the argument. A Soldier and a Politician, both agreed though that Camilla's ambitions only worked on paper, so when confronted with their castle overrun and their sister dead it became a matter of duty or survival. Instead of dying in a good fight, Striga looked past her desire of battle and agreed to follow Morana in living, and Morana gave up any political power she could have under an empire to be a mercenary. They didn't overreach, and it spares them their lives in a surprising conclusion where the 'bad guys' still kinda get to live happily ever after.

The ReHumanization of Alucard Alucard has always been a fan favourite, but in the world of Castlevania he still acts as an outcast. While helping the village and getting close to Greta helps bring out some positive emotions in him, it's his dedication to saving the people that gives the show some of its lightest moments, especially when he toys with the kids. In a way it's what he wanted from the twins, but they had lived to not trust and wanted to kill rather than survive, and he grew a community out of it. Allowing the town to settle is the ultimate payoff for Alucard too, because it fulfills his mother's dream, now there are people who know the knowledge that his father did.

Bringing the old band together We all knew that Trevor and Sypha were gonna reunite with Alucard sometime near the end, I mean it's a shame they ditched a city that cannot organize themselves but they were kinda needed in the castle. What's best is that the moment came in it was like they never left, perfectly in sync and bantering off each other, when they fought the top level vampires it was their teamwork and synergy which made them overcome - which is great battle narrative too because alone they were getting beaten. It's just the stuff you love to see.

Trevor is tougher than Death The final battle being Trevor vs Death was a proper Attack on Titan-esque boss fight, just peeling away at the enemy and trying not to get hit. As well as a feast for the eyes it proved to be an entertaining climax - in spite of the limited info we got on the magic 3-piece dagger - and in a way it paid off Trevor's character journey. When we first met him he was an outcasted drunk that wanted nothing to do with the world let alone his family, but now he's here fighting death to save innocent people, his half-vampire buddy and his pregnant speaker magician girlfriend, being willing to give his own life for something bigger than himself, and succeeding...thanks to Saint Germain who owed him a favour and one very clever unsung hero of a horse. To tell you the truth when I saw the trailer I was expecting Sypha to have died and Trevor to be pulling her out of hell by fighting death, but this still worked really well and was perhaps a bit more logical to the canon they set.

Death is temporary, Dracula is forever With all the attempts to revive Dracula one had to work eventually. But back at Season 3 I'm sure we all thought about what would Dracula's reaction be anyway. I mean, yeah he's dead but his wife is there, you really wanna be the guy who ripped him from his wife a second time? It worked though because the people loyal to Dracula never truly understood his grief, they only wanted to further their own agendas through him. So when Dracula does come back in the final scenes with his wife, we see that Vlad Tepes is no longer the vicious killer he once was, not for now anyway. Reviving Dracula may make people think that Trevor and Sypha's actions in Season 3 and 4 were worthless because he still revives but you do have to remember that they do still save a few lives and make a few less night creatures. In addition if they want to expand the universe long into the future they can bring Dracula back in older and disillusioned again if they see fit.

He has many faces, but you still know him At about episode 8 I was really ramping up to tear into the Alchemist and Varney for being practically useless characters, but then the show went and hit me with a great twist by having both characters being guises of Death itself, the proper big bad of the season. It was a fantastic twist which validates the characters, because it was super suspect that the alchemist know where the girl was and said you can't look at her rebus, and that Varney felt like a beta Godbrand but still managed to slither away from the fights. His design was excellent too, the crown was really menacing.

A Surprise Happy Ending! Like, could any of us imagined that? The fight ends, Trevor and Sypha live happily to make a family, Alucard has his friends, a girlfriend and a community that appreciates him, Isaac has his own kingdom, Hector doesn't get the girl or a finger but he still has his freedom, Striga and Morana have each other, it mostly wrapped up very neatly and was earned, a satisfying end which closes the chapter on our trio.

Conclusion

It is sad to see great shows end, Castlevania's use of anime-style animation with gore and a strong voice cast has done extremely well, especially for a show who only got 4 episodes for a first season. It did feel like Netflix didn't give it a chance, but it pulled it off big time and escaped Netflix's cancel hammer long enough to bring a satisfying story, and one can hope we see more of this style and universe either in more Castlevania stories or even the rumored Devil May Cry adaptation.

[hunterguyveriv]

Injustice 3 Characters?........I’m hoping so!

So as of late, I've been hearing rumors that an Injustice 3 game is in the works. As much as I want all characters from both games to come back I think there are some characters whether they are DC characters that have yet to make an appearance, Crossover characters, or simply characters Warner Brothers has the movie rights to that I would love to see. This is my short list on who I would love to see in Injustice 3 if the rumors are indeed true as DLC characters.

DC Comics Characters: Abby Arcane - Current Avatar of the Rot: She could be an interesting addition to the Injustice cast if Swamp Thing and Poison Ivy return. I could see her dialogue with Swamp Thing being similar to Ollie & Dinah's and her dialogue with Ivy being more vicious towards because Swamp Thing's heart and soul has always been Abby's. Now I know, that they are no longer an item (regrettibly) but it has been proven in one of the recent Justice League Dark comics that they still have feelings for each other even though one is the Avatar of the Rot and the other is the Avatar of the Green

Anton Arcane - Rival Rot Avatar: If Abby is added for Swamp Thing then you have to have the one person who is their worst enemy. Dialogue between both him and Abby and him and Swamp Thing would be vicious and awesome. Even his dialogue with Ivy a hinted future Avatar of the Green from the New 52 Swamp Thing series. he could also be an invaluable ally to Superman to a point because in one of the tie-in crossover series to Injustice Superman obtained Rot-Creatures to protect his territory from magic.

Zuggernaut:  I admit I know little to nothing about this character, except that he appears to be a copy of the manga version of the last character in this short list (who was created in 1985) and think it would be nice to see both on screen together challenging each other on who the true Alien Bio-Weapon really is. Would also be kind of sweet to see him and Jaime’s Blue Beetle fight.

Animal Man: An ally to Alec Holland during the RotWorld saga, I think interactions with not Just Swamp Thing but Vixen, Cheetah, Ivy, Aquaman (who is literally the Avatar of the Blue - Water) would be interesting. More so if Abby Arcane and Anton Arcane are added to the game.

Crossover Characters:

Oroku Saki aka The Shredder: Come on now, like Swamp Thing and Anton Arcane, you can't add the Ninja Turtles without adding their greatest enemy the Shredder. If memory also serves me right from the Batman vs TMNT movie, Shredder was also someone who could go toe to toe with Batman in combat and beat him and had him on the ropes their second encounter. Depending on what continuity you follow Shredder has been known to take down aliens 3 times bigger and stronger than him. So him taking on someone like Superman and soundly beating in a game like Injustice wouldn’t be that much of a stretch.

He-Man and Teela: Let me be as blunt as blunt can be. This is NOT because of the new Kevin Smith series. This is because of the Injustice vs Masters of the Universe tie-in comics. Both He-Man and Teela in those comics proved they could fight not just Superman but with Bane and Wonder Woman also. Teela mortally wounded Wonder Woman (who was saved on Batman’s quick thinking) and was even called a Good Soldier by a bleeding out Wonder Woman and up until the power of Greyskull ran out, He-Man was going blow for blow with Superman. Teela also got the attention of Granny Goodness with her prowess of a fighter and considered.....”TRAINING”..... her to be an addition to her Furies.

But even the He-Man vs Teela dialogue could be prove to be rather interesting, especially if she is te Injustice vs MotU Teela who knows Prince Adam is He-Man, and could prove to be comical with others because she kind of gets jealous when Zatanna touches Adam’s chest-plate. 

Skeletor: But including He-Man and Teela, you have to include Skeletor who was plotting not just against Superman but also Darkseid all to gain access to Castle Greyskull even though it cost him his life in the end..... or did it?

But with the inclusion of He-Man, Teela, and Skeletor it also can open up the door for Hordak who in the Injustice vs Masters of the Universe forms his own version of a Red-Ring corps and took over Apokolips. The Hordak who like Darkseid is more than happy to commit genocide on hundreds of planets just for a whim. Which I know some will argue with his involvement you gotta have She-Ra - which I would agree, BUT Classic She-Ra. The same She-Ra who also had the title Desparda who had no qualms killing thousands in the name of Hordak and nearly killed her brother in the MotU: Eternity War saga which was also done by DC Comics. I know the She-Ra fans of the recent series will be upset with that, but lets be honest - for something that is dark and serious like Injustice, the new versions of Hordak and She-Ra just simply wouldn’t cut it. She-Ra and Teela matches and She-Ra and He-Man matches alone would be a nice add. Sibling Rivalry and two future Sister-in-Laws... “SPARRING.”

Guyver: I know, I know this is a wishful-thinking-pipe dream of a fan to a dying franchise. I know New Line Cinemas did the movies and Warner Brothers now own the rights to the Guyver movies, since I last checked or at least Guyver: Dark Hero (1994) which is the main reason I want to see Guyver crossover into Injustice. But I would love to see Guyver and Blue-Beetle (2 Alien War Machines) go at it and even even Guyver vs Zuggernaut. The dialogue alone along with their super attacks would be absolute gold!

Edit-Addons for DC Characters (6-25): Magog (Kingdom Come): If anyone by now isn’t familiar with Kingdom Come, it is an alternative to the Injustice Series. Instead of Superman killing Joker for Lois’ death it was Magog. When the aquittal of Magog forced Superman to go into a self imposed exile, Magog formed his own group of Super-humans and distributed his own ruthless form of justice upon those that his group fought culminating in the destruction of Kansas. The inclusion of his character could prove interesting because like Injustice the death of Lois at the hands of Joker and his deaths set into motion in both “universes” where the Justice League (who’s dangerously close to turning into the regime) and Batman’s allies fight.

Gog (The Kingdom): With the Multi-Verse in play from both games, the inclusion of this guy is a must! He started off as a normal man by the name of William who was one of the survivors of the Kansas Disaster caused by Magog, saw Superman as the as quite literally a Jesus Christ type figure. When Superman set him straight on things including the Kansas Disaster, William’s beliefs were shaken to the core and questioning his worth, in which the Phantom Stranger bestowed upon him all sorts of powers (powers of Zeus, Shazam, Oan, and a few others I believe). But with his beliefs shaken along with his worth and mental stability fractured, he used said abilities to go on a Superman killing spree throughout the multi-verse. He was so mad that he even went back in time and caused his own Kansas Disaster catching the attention of the present Superman/Wonder Woman/Batman. It took the combined might of the time Traveling Superman/Wonder Woman/Batman and some allies with the “present day” versions of themselves and “PD”-Superman piercing the veil of the multi-verse to completely defeat Gog. Seeing him fight Injustice-Superman alone would be worth his inclusion.

[niuttuc]

New “budget” Commander cards: Lord of the Rings: Colorless and lands

We've reached the end of the colors! Now off to generic cards, and then we can take a look at the multicolor options. They are numerous so I might group them in batches or make multiple posts just for multicolor options. Tell me what you think I should do for those in the notes!

You know these by now, we'll go color by color, mixing main set and commander set. Reprints can be included if they brought the price down under our bar. All the cards presented here are under $2 at time of writing. Cards will be evaluated as part of the 99, even legendary creatures.

This card isn't very good, but it ensures everyone at the table gets to at least play the game. With most games proceeding clockwise, it'll be painfully slow to get around the table if the player needing help is on your left though. Still, an easy include if you want to make some friends or are running the likes of Zedruu or Blim. Oh, also much better after an Aeon Engine, not that it makes either of them good cards, it's just a fun thought.

Ignore the first strike ability, this equipment gives you FIVE untaps of whatever you put it on per turn cycle and haste. If your commander (or enough of your deck) has an instant speed tap ability, this is a new staple, one of the best sources of untaps out there.

This one is quite the mana investment to get going, though doubling a board of tokens every turn is fun at the very least. Given the token created on ETB, this is a decent option for human and tokeny decks, just be aware that it takes a while, a lot of mana and a lot of board wipes dodged to start doing stupid things.

This is NOT a new design idea by any stretch, but cheap graveyard-hate artifacts you can crack have been a healthy part of decks since Tormod's Crypt in The Dark. This new one is quite good, not quite as broad or efficient as some other options, Soul-Guide Lantern is still the gold standard. With that said, it has its upsides too, not only dealing with graveyards but also passively stopping all opposing death triggers, including from tokens, which against some aristocraty decks is a back-breaking ability for a 1 drop with extra upside. It's a one drop so you can also get it with Urza's saga, and it never affects you like a Relic of Progenitus would.

Most decks probably would benefit from having at least one or two of these cycling graveyard hate artifacts, but it's never the most fun include. Be a responsible player, eat your veggies, and pack some graveyard hate, and no, Bojuka Bog and Scavenger Grounds aren't enough by themselves.

We've seen a lot of "attack with two creatures, draw a card" lately, particularly in mono-white with Chivalric Alliance and Glimmer Lens in back to back sets, both at two mana. This is another option that can go in any color, does that, can draw more than one card a turn if you attack different players with 2+ creatures each (though I don't think that'll happen often). It offers additional card selection but only ever draws creatures, but if you're running this you should have enough that that's an upside. It's a powerful and cheap tools for aggressive (particularly go wide) decks to avoid running out of gas.

These two lands tell you what they want, they're solid and cheap fixing additions for legendary-focused decks. Neither of them is quite a new Plaza of Heroes, but also they're a dirt cheap common and uncommon. Not much more to say here.

A new three mana mana rock with upside! It's alright, most decks probably don't want it. It's one of the best cards in a handful of decks that can abuse it, Evra and Eruth come to mind, but most of the time, it's just a Manalith that'll very rarely draw you a card. If you can make that happen more often though, either because you're chugging through your entire hand often or because you're wheeling* and dealing, it might be worth a slot. I know I might try it in Jaxis because I often rummage through my last card and draw two or three more cards at end of turn, and getting extras would be pretty neat. Not sure if it won't end up cut in a month, but I'll try. The lifegain mode is basically irrelevant unless you have some serious shenanigans, like Evra who was mentioned earlier.

*Important rules note: Cards are always drawn one at a time. This WILL work with wheels, but it will only double a single card draw and not all of them. A Wheel of Fortune with this out will discard your hand and draw you eight cards, not fourteen. It might still be worth including in wheel deck, but it's something to be aware of.

Finally, Basalt Monolith is back in a commander precon for the first time in nearly a decade, and is now back to being pretty cheap. If you want to combo with it, now's the time to grab copies at a fraction of the usual $5 price.

[laboratorioautoral]

The original outline and why it is still relevant to ASOIF

Since the original outline for A Song of Ice and Fire was leaked there’s been a massive effort, both in fandom and mainstream media, to discredit everything that was revealed there as a potential clue for the future of the story.

Although I agree that some changes happened, I don’t subscribe to the idea that the outline is irrelevant at this point. This little essay is my attempt to analyze the outline and compare it with what has already happened and still could happen in the future books, how much was changed and more importantly, how it was changed. I won’t say this is an impartial analysis (because I don’t believe that such a thing exists) but an honest effort of textual interpretation.

Here we go:

“Dear Ralph,

Here are the first thirteen chapters (170 pages) of the high fantasy novel I promised you, which I'm calling 'A Game of Thrones.' When completed, this will be the first volume in what I see as an epic trilogy with the overall title, 'A Song of Ice and Fire.'”

First things first. A Song of Ice and Fire was first imagined as a trilogy and the fact that GRRM extended it to 7 books obviously has an impact in terms of structure. It seems quite reasonable to assume that a lot more would have to happen to fill the gap occupied by 4 additional books. That alone is a huge influencing factor, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that the essence of the story was changed as we can see in the following paragraphs.

“As you know, I don't outline my novels. I find that if I know exactly where a book is going, I lose all interest in writing it. I do, however, have some strong notions as to the overall structure of the story I'm telling, and the eventual fate of many of the principle characters in the drama. Roughly speaking, there are three major conflicts set in motion in the chapters enclosed. These will form the major plot threads of the trilogy, [unclear] each other in what should be a complex but exciting (I hope [unclear] tapestry. Each of the [unclear] presents a major threat [unclear] of my imaginary realm, the Seven Kingdoms, and to the live [unclear] principal characters.”

Here we have Martin admitting that he usually doesn’t outline his novels over fear that he will lose interest while writing it. However, he also clarifies that he has “some strong notions” for the story he is telling, especially in which concerns those he considers to be the main characters.

In some of interviews Martin already said that the ending he had planned many years ago is still in place and he has known the characters’ endings ever since. It’s safe to assume, I think, that the core of his plans hasn’t changed much. What might have changed is the path that leads the characters from one point to another.

“The first threat grows from the enmity between the great houses of Lannister and Stark as it plays out in a cycle of plot, counter-plot, ambition, murder, and revenge, with the iron throne of the Seven Kingdoms as the ultimate prize. This will form the backbone of the first volume of the trilogy, A Game of Thrones.”

Can anyone say that this didn’t happen? Of course not. This is the spark that lights the fire that will consume the Seven Kingdoms throughout the story, with major and minor consequences that will shape both the narrative and the characters’ development. The conflict between Starks and Lannisters is the first of three conflicts that represent the core of the story.

“While the lion of Lannister and the direwolf of Stark snarl and scrap, however, a second and greater threat takes shape across the narrow sea, where the Dothraki horselords mass their barbarian hordes for a great invasion of the Seven Kingdoms, led by the fierce and beautiful Daenerys Stormborn, the last of the Targaryen dragonlords. The Dothraki invasion will be the central story of my second volume, A Dance with Dragons.”

Here we have the second major conflict and with this one in particular I’ll have to take my time to elaborate some points. First of all, A Dance With Dragons became the 5th book of the series instead of the second. So far everything we saw about Daenerys was her preparing to take her place at the center of the stage.

Dany has her own arc which hasn’t integrated to the events in Westeros so far given to her geographic location. That doesn’t mean that Daenerys has no relevance to what’s happening in Westeros, but her existence wasn’t directly noticed by the seven kingdoms yet. Daenerys is preparing for her role in the main story: She is gathering a military force based on the Dothraki to invade Westeros.

We already know that Daenerys will have more than just the Dothraki on her side. The Unsullied were added to the plot and my guess is that they exist to humanize Daenerys and make us sympathize with her cause as she creates the great narrative of “Breaker of Chains”. This makes Daenerys sound heroic and noble, but I would like to point that Martin is very specific about one thing: The fierce and beautiful Daenerys Stormborn is first and foremost a threat. She is ready to invade Westeros and invasions are not peaceful.

At this point we already know two things worth being mentioned that are related both with Daenerys and the title of this book: The Dance of Dragons was a civil war involving two Targaryen claimants to the Iron Throne. On one side we had Rhaenyra, firstborn of the king and rightful heir if gender wasn’t an issue in Westerosi succession laws. On the other side we had Aegon, a son born from the king’s second marriage. His claim was mostly based on gender norms that favor male heirs in detriment of primogeniture.

It isn’t much of a dance if we only have one dragon, is it? Yes, Daenerys is the first half of this equation, but there is another half that Martin hadn’t created yet (or didn’t mention) when he wrote the outline. There is a second Targaryen, or at least someone who claims to be one.

Aegon VI, or Young Griff, is actually the first one to arrive in Westeros with invasion in mind. Does it mean that Dany is less of a threat or that she was suddenly placed in a heroic position? Absolutely not. No one with three dragons is a harmless creature and Dany is even more dangerous now that she has a direct enemy in position to take away everything she fought for.

I know that there’s a lot of speculation on whether Aegon is a Blackfire or not, but honestly I think his true lineage will be irrelevant as long as he has at least a drop of Targaryen blood and the right looks. Legitimate or not, Aegon looks like a Targaryen, has the house’s ancestral sword and a story that is convincing enough. More than that, by posing as Prince Rhaegar’s legitimate son, Aegon makes his claim stronger than Daenerys’. On top of that, he would be the Targaryen male heir in opposition to a Targaryen woman, repeating at least a part of the scenery that led Westeros to the Dance of Dragons.

Aegon and Daenerys are bound to become enemies because of their own ambitions. I don’t see Dany accepting him as a suitor or even the rightful heir. She doesn’t need Aegon to take Westeros and a queen without a king is, historically speaking, more powerful.

Everything said about Aegon can also be applied to Jon once his true parentage is revealed. Jon and Daenerys are a threat to each other and only one will survive this.

“The greatest danger of all, however, comes from the north, from the icy wastes beyond the Wall, where half-forgotten demons out of legend, the inhuman others, raise cold legions of the undead and the neverborn and prepare to ride down on the winds of winter to extinguish everything that we would call "life." The only thing that stands between the Seven Kingdoms and an endless night is the Wall, and a handful of men in black called the Night's Watch. Their story will be [sic] heart of my third volume, The Winds of Winter. The final battle will also draw together characters and plot threads left from the first two books and resolve all in one huge climax.”

The third and greatest danger also remains just the same. The Others are still the core of the last book and the major battle. There isn’t much to elaborate on in this part except for the title of what was supposed to be the last book, The Winds of Winter.

I don’t think A Dream of Spring will be some sort of extended epilogue, but most of the action and conflict should take part during The Winds of Winter. At the very least the center of the whole debate will be both the North, with all the plots there, and what lies beyond the Wall.

“The thirteen chapters on hand should give you a notion as to my narrative strategy. All three books will feature a complex mosaic of inter-cutting points-of-view among various of my large and diverse cast of players. The cast will not always remain the same. Old characters will die, and new ones will be introduced. Some of the fatalities will include sympathetic viewpoint characters. I want the reader to feel that no one is ever completely safe, not even the characters who seem to be the heroes. The suspense always ratchets up a notch when you know that any character can die at any time.”

Needless to say anything about this. The books are well-known for these hallmarks. Now we are getting to the juicy part.

--

“Five central characters will make it through all three volumes, however, growing from children to adults and changing the world and themselves in the process. In a sense, my trilogy is almost a generational saga, telling the life stories of these five characters, three men and two women. The five key players are Tyrion Lannister, Daenerys Targaryen, and three of the children of Winterfell, Arya, Bran, and the bastard Jon Snow. All of them are introduced at some length in the chapters you have to hand.”

I would like to make a point here. The five characters will grow from children to adults, changing the world and themselves in the process.

Although I believe that Martin made a bit of a mess in which concerns the characters’ ages, I think we can understand that the characters will not only be forced to act like adults, but also will be perceived as such by those around them and given positions of power or leadership.

Specifically in which concerns the female characters, both Daenerys and Arya will be perceived as adult women by Westerosi society and this is important for several reasons, mainly in that being an adult noblewoman is a relevant component to form political alliances via marriage. In Arya’s case in particular, it reinforces the idea that she won’t be a nine year old girl forever. This impacts her relevance in the political game (something people usually overlook or ignore) and also makes it possible for Arya to have romantic interests.

“This is going to be (I hope) quite an epic. Epic in its scale, epic in its action, and epic in its length. I see all three volumes as big books, running about 700 to 800 manuscript pages, so things are just barely getting underway in the thirteen chapters I've sent you.”

Can anyone say it isn’t an epic? Sometimes I wish it wasn’t so intense so the books would come earlier, but here we are.

“I have quite a clear notion of how the story is going to unfold in the first volume, A Game of Thrones. Things will get a lot worse for the poor Starks before they get better, I'm afraid. Lord Eddard Stark and his wife Catelyn Tully are both doomed, and will perish at the hands of their enemies. Ned will discover what happened to his friend Jon Arryn, [unclear] can act on his knowledge [unclear] will have an unfortunate accident, and the throne will [unclear] to [unclear] and brutal [unclear] Joffrey [unclear] still a minor. Joffrey will not be sympathetic and Ned [what appears to say] will be accused of treason, but before he is taken he will help his wife and his daughter Arya escape back to Winterfell.”

Here we have proof that Ned and Catelyn were doomed from the start. Basically everything in this paragraph happened, even the part in which Ned helps Arya to escape by giving her position to Yoren. The only problem is that Arya never reached Winterfell and her mother had left the capital before Ned was arrested. Also the part that says that “things will get much worse for the poor Starks before they get better” makes me think that it’s quite clear that the Starks (or some of them) are the main protagonists of this story.

Why am I saying the Starks (or some of them) are the main heroes? Because being a charismatic character, created with the intention of getting the readers’ sympathy, isn’t necessarily what makes this character a protagonist. You can like whoever you want in the story, this doesn’t make a secondary character a main character, nor does it make a likable character the ‘hero’. The structure of the story and who are the main players is already given.

“Each of the contending families will learn it has a member of dubious loyalty in its midst. Sansa Stark, wed to Joffrey Baratheon, will bear him a son, the heir to the throne, and when the crunch comes she will choose her husband and child over her parents and siblings, a choice she will later bitterly rue. Tyrion Lannister, meanwhile, will befriend both Sansa and her sister Arya, while growing more and more disenchanted with his own family.”

Tyrion and Sansa were set to be the ones with dubious loyalties to their families. This also happened with slight differences. Tyrion befriends Jon and is somewhat sympathetic to Sansa and Bran. Sansa didn’t marry Joffrey, but she did choose him over her own family  the moment she went to Cersei to tell her Ned’s plans to get Sansa and Arya out of the capital. This might or might not indicate that she will have the chance to repent and atone for this, but her dubious loyalty is consolidated. Also Sansa has no children so far.

“Young Bran will come out of his coma, after a strange prophetic dream, only to discover that he will never walk again. He will turn to magic, at first in the hope of restoring his legs, but later for its own sake. When his father Eddard Stark is executed, Bran will see the shape of doom descending on all of them, but nothing he can say will stop his brother Robb from calling the banners in rebellion. All the north will be inflamed by war. Robb will win several splendid victories, and maim Joffrey Baratheon on the battlefield, but in the end he will not be able to stand against Jaime and Tyrion Lannister and their allies. Robb Stark will die in battle, and Tyrion Lannister will besiege and burn Winterfell.”

Bran’s arc is pretty much the same. We saw all of these things happen to him. The biggest change is in Robb’s part and even so most of it remains untouched. Robb did win splendid victories and in the books he even strategically beats both Jaime and Tyrion. What changed is that Robb and Joffrey never fought each other personally. Also Robb’s death was not on the battlefield but during the Red Wedding and Tyrion wasn't the one to sack Winterfell and burn it.

Tyrion’s first act of explicit villainy in the outline was transferred to Houses Bolton and Frey with participation of Theon Greyjoy. Still it was all part of the Lannisters’ plot and it was executed by their allies.

“Jon Snow, the bastard, will remain in the far north. He will mature into a ranger of great daring, and ultimately will succeed his uncle as the commander of the Night's Watch. When Winterfell burns, Catelyn Stark will be forced to flee north with her son Bran and her daughter Arya. Wounded by Lannister riders, they will seek refuge at the Wall, but the men of the Night's Watch give up their families when they take the black, and Jon and Benjen will not be able to help, to Jon's anguish. It will lead to a bitter estrangement between Jon and Bran. Arya will be more forgiving ... until she realizes, with terror, that she has fallen in love with Jon, who is not only her half-brother but a man of the Night's Watch, sworn to celibacy. Their passion will continue to torment Jon and Arya throughout the trilogy, until the secret of Jon's true parentage is finally revealed in the last book.”

Here we have some changes. What doesn’t change is that Jon becomes a member of the Night’s Watch and ultimately ascends to the position of Lord Commander. Benjen is a famous member of the Night’s Watch and I believe he was the first choice to take the position of Lord Commander after Mormont, but Ben’s disappearance accelerated Jon’s ascension.

Catelyn and Arya never fled Winterfell, since their paths had already taken them somewhere else, but Bran did and his first impulse is to go to the Wall. Given the fact that the three eyed raven calls him, Bran’s magical journey leads him to go beyond the Wall before he can be reunited with Jon.

Arya and Cat had completely different journeys, or at least partially. Cat seeks her eldest son and stays by Robb’s side during his campaign. Arya, on the other hand, is stranded all over the Riverlands trying to find her way to either Winterfell or the Wall, although she explicitly says that she prefers to go to Wall, where she can find Jon. There was a clear intention to send both Bran and Arya to the Wall, but as the story progressed this decision might have been abandoned temporarily.

Thanks to his vows, Jon can’t take part in the realm’s politics. When news of Ned’s fate arrive at the Wall, Jon is devastated by the impossibility to help his family and fight side by side with Robb. Jon’s moral boundaries and his code of honor become a huge issue for him in the books, and they are tested the most whenever his family is involved. This seems to be his main dilemma in the outline as well.

Jon’s relationship with his family is also ambiguous in some aspects, especially when it’s revealed that his greatest dream since he was young was to be the Lord of Winterfell. This implies a level of rivalry and envy of his true born siblings. Jon repressed these feelings as much as he could out of love for the Starks.

Now I’ll make some guesses here, I don’t think it’s impossible for Bran and Jon to have some bitter estrangement between them, but it won’t be because of the Night’s Watch: If Jon is released from his vows once he is resurrected and takes back Winterfell along with the titles, it will undoubtedly lead to a succession crisis involving not only rights of conquest but also Robb’s will. Bran’s rights are directly affected in this scenario and, unlike the show, Bran never once questioned his position as Robb’s heir. It’s not impossible to imagine that factions will gather behind both claimants and this can cause another crisis in the North and bitterness between brothers in a moment when union is crucial.

Arya has a close relationship with both Bran and Jon and she is someone both of them feel inclined to listen to. I think Arya will be the bridge between them and the one to diplomatically avoid a rupture in the North, but it doesn’t mean the bitterness between Bran and Jon will disappear.

Now we reach the hugest taboo of the outline and the main reason why people claim “it’s no longer relevant” or that “Martin changed his mind”. Jon and Arya falling in love.

Let’s get one thing very clear, Jon and Arya already love each other in the books. This is not my opinion, this is the literal text.

Jon’s best friend was Robb and still Jon affirms that he missed Arya the most. Just go back to the books and count how many times and how affectionately they think of each other. They repeatedly say how they miss finishing each other’s sentences and how Jon loves to mess Arya’s hair. “The memory of her laughter kept him warm during the long journey north.” and “Needle was Jon Snow’s smile” are two small quotes that speak volumes of how deep this love is.

Am I saying this is a romantic sort of love? No. I’m not saying this. What I’m doing is  highlighting the fact that this particular relationship stands out as one of the strongest (if not the strongest) bond in the books to the point where it’s not even questionable that Jon and Arya love each other the most. It’s strong enough to make Jon forsake his vows and decide to march to Winterfell to rescue a girl he thinks to be Arya. It’s strong enough to make Arya lie to Ned because she would never betray Jon.

Jon didn’t break his vows for any other sibling, no matter how much he wanted to, but he did it to save whom he thought was Arya. His love for her is the cause of Jon’s death in the books. He committed treason the moment he received the pink letter and decided to march against Ramsay Bolton. Jon’s last thought is “stick’em with the pointy end”.

I think it’s safe to assume that Jon will be resurrected and Melissandre is probably the one to perform the ritual. We already know that resurrections have some side effects in the asoiaf universe, the most evident one being some sort of obsessive thought that keeps guiding the resurrected’s actions (like Beric Dondarrion’s obsession with keeping the king’s peace, and Lady Stoneheart killing Freys to avenge Robb’s death). Jon’s last thought was directly related to Arya and there’s no other possible interpretation. His last thought is likely to become his obsession.

I also think it’s safe to say that Jon’s memory will stay inside Ghost at least for a while and we will have to wait and see the effects that will have on Jon’s personality once he comes back to life.

Varamir said that Ghost would be a second life fit for a king and I think this is a clear foreshadowing of Jon’s true identity. There are also some other aspects of wolf pack dynamics that deserve some consideration: Wolves are social animals that have hierarchy and well divided roles inside the pack and although Ghost is a lonely wolf that was separated from his original group, it would only take one female for him to start his own pack. Curiously Nymeria is an alpha female already, leading a pack of regular wolves, but she rejects her smaller cousins as potential mates. Ghost and Nymeria are the alpha male and female of a new pack. The wolves of Winterfell will come back; stronger and more dangerous.

I think all of these elements will play a significant role in how Jon and Arya’s love will change once they are reunited. It won’t be immediate, but as the story goes the sexual tension will become evident. Jon’s perception of Arya as a sister will be blurred as a teenage Arya starts to see him as a love interest. At this point Arya will already be perceived as an adult woman according to Westerosi society, as I pointed out before. My guess is that she will be close to Daenerys’ age when she married Drogo. I’m not judging if this is right or wrong by our own moral standards. What I’m saying is that it’s acceptable in the world created by GRRM.

As the outline says, their passion will continue to torment Jon and Arya throughout the trilogy, until Jon’s true parentage is revealed. This necessarily implies that: 1) they are not siblings; 2) their passion brings a lot of moral issues and they are not comfortable with it; 3) their agony has an end when Jon’s parentage is revealed. Jon’s true parentage is a moral free pass for them and, at least from what we can read in the outline, this is more relevant than any potential succession rights.

This moral free pass wouldn’t be applied in a romantic relationship between Jon and Daenerys for example. It would actually have the opposite effect, giving Jon reason to question his moral choices and torment himself with doubts. This plot point is not applicable to Sansa either, mostly because Sansa and Jon don’t have a close relationship that’s already been established. They have a distant one and don’t even think much about each other. The whole point of Jon and Arya’s strong bond is to lay the foundations for a romance, establishing a relationship based on love, mutual loyalty and respect.

Do we have any indication that Jon and Arya’s romance was scrapped based on the books? No. Do we have any conclusive evidence in the text that Arya was replaced by any other female character? No. Why do I think Jon and Arya are endgame? Because we have only two books left and a lot of events that must be covered by them. It’s way easier to use an already established loving relationship with 5 books of consistent development and make it a romantic one (and make it believable as an epic romance because all the dramatic elements are already there), than to write a brand new one from scratch and make the reader believe that this is the ultimate love story.

“Abandoned by the Night's Watch, Catelyn and her children will find their only hope of safety lies even further north, beyond the Wall, where they fall into the hands of Mance Rayder, the King-beyond-the-Wall, and get a dreadful glimpse of the inhuman others as they attack the wilding encampment. Bran's magic, Arya's sword Needle, and the savagery of their direwolves will help them survive, but their mother Catelyn will die at the hands of the others.”

Catelyn was meant to be killed by the Others. It’s not hard to conclude that she would have become one of them. The major difference from the outline to the books is that Catelyn died elsewhere, however she was brought back to life by fire magic as Lady Stoneheart. I can also see Bran and Arya fighting against the Others with the help of their direwolves in the event of a great battle by the end of the books. There’s nothing indicating that this part was cut, it just hasn’t happened yet.

“Over across the narrow sea, Daenerys Targaryen will discover that her new husband, the Dothraki Khal Drogo, has little interest in invading the Seven Kingdoms, much to her brother's frustration. When Viserys presses his claims past the point of tact or wisdom, Khal Drogo will finally grow annoyed and kill him out of hand, eliminating the Targaryen pretender and leaving Daenerys as the last of her line. Danerys [sic] will bide her time, but she will not forget. When the moment is right, she will kill her husband to avenge her brother, and then flee with a trusted friend into the wilderness beyond Vaes Dothrak. There, hunted by [unclear] of her life, she stumbles on a [something about dragon eggs] a young dragon will give Daenerys [unclear] bend [unclear] to her will. Then she begins to plan for her invasion of the Seven Kingdoms.”

Daenerys’ arc here didn’t change much. What changed was her motivation to kill Drogo and how she gets the dragons. Everything else that happens to her since the second book is her preparing to invade Westeros.

“Tyrion Lannister will continue to travel, to plot, and to play the game of thrones, finally removing his nephew Joffrey in disgust at the boy king's brutality. Jaime Lannister will follow Joffrey on the throne of the Seven Kingdoms, by the simple expedient of killing everyone ahead of him in the line of succession and blaming his brother Tyrion for the murders. Exiled, Tyrion will change sides, making common cause with the surviving Starks to bring his brother down, and falling helplessly in love with Arya Stark while he's at it. His passion is, alas, unreciprocated, but no less intense for that, and it will lead to a deadly rivalry between Tyrion and Jon Snow.”

There’s only one character that was replaced, I think. The Jaime Lannister of the outline seems to have been replaced by Cersei in the books, and it makes much more sense.  The Baratheons are briefly mentioned and we know Joffrey to be officially one. We know that Tyrion and Jaime are Lannisters and that Tyrion and Jaime are brothers. Unless Joffrey’s official father was a Lannister, Jaime would have no place in the line of succession to the throne whatsoever and this is important even when you want to use the rights of conquest. Cersei could have one, by becoming her son’s heiress in case there’s no one else left.

Also, although Sansa didn’t marry Joffrey, her wedding to Tyrion still makes her a Lannister and ties her to the enemy. Her loyalty was put to the test because of Joffrey, but her ties to the Lannisters were consolidated with Tyrion. Her arc is still in place. Her marriage wasn’t declared null so far and I don’t think it will happen anytime soon. As far as public knowledge goes, Sansa is Lady Lannister.

As for the love triangle Jon Snow x Tyrion x Arya, I don’t think it’s impossible at all. While it’s true that so far Tyrion hasn't interacted with Arya and I doubt he even remembers her face from the short time he stayed at Winterfell, the Arya he will eventually meet will be an educated young woman that had many intriguing experiences in Braavos, is very charismatic and makes friends with everyone and anyone. Tyrion, being a man profoundly affected by his physical condition would gravitate towards her. I don’t think it’s hard to imagine him falling for someone capable of seeing him as an individual as Arya is.

There’s also an argument to be made that this love triangle might have been replaced by Ramsay x Arya x Jon in some ways. After all Tyrion didn’t burn Winterfell, Ramsay did. He also married a fake Arya (Jeyne Poole) to claim Winterfell in her name, leading to a violent rivalry between Ramsay and Jon.

This plot point might have just been either altered to replace Tyrion with Ramsay, or it hasn’t happened yet.

“[The next graph is blocked out.]

But that's the second book ... 

I hope you will find some editors who are as excited about all of this as I am. Feel free to share this letter with anyone who wants to know how the story will go. 

All best,

George R.R. Martin”

With everything said so far we can conclude a few things:

1) The three major conflicts remain the same.

2) Ned, Cat, Robb, Viserys and Drogo’s fate didn’t change.

3) Bran still went through a coma and can’t walk anymore. He also developed magical abilities. An eventual strained relationship with Jon is still possible.

4) Tyrion and Sansa’s dubious loyalties to their families weren't removed from the books and Sansa still got tied to the enemy via marriage, although to a different character.

5) Tyrion continues to travel, to plot, and to play the game of thrones. He didn’t kill Joffrey, but was blamed for it anyway. Eventually he will make alliances with enemies of his house.

6) Jon joined the Night’s Watch and became Lord Commander. His vows are constantly challenged, especially when his family is endangered. His incapacity to help them keeps torturing him and in the books it leads to his death.

7) Jon and Arya share a strong bond, based on love, mutual trust and loyalty, and respect. This relationship remains one of the most important ones in the books. This relationship was consistently developed throughout the 5 books already published and turning it into a romantic one is still possible.

8) Jon’s true parentage is super relevant.

9) Daenerys’ arc didn’t change.

10) The love triangle Jon x Arya x Tyrion was either replaced by Jon x FArya x Ramsay, or could still happen in its original form once Tyrion and Arya have the chance to interact with each other.

This was my lengthy analysis of the original outline and why I think it’s still valid. I hope you enjoyed it.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

"Ah, Mademoiselle Raven, we meet again! It has been far too long, and I have missed your presence! Have you given any thought to reconsider my offer at the alter from our Ghost Marriage rendezvous? I am just a *quiver* at the prospect of your magnifique hand in marriage! Non, but I get ahead of myself. I have forgotten, Monsieur Mastermind has already claimed you as theirs, has he not? Ah, but I do relish a challenge! Oui!" - Yours, Rook Hunt

This ask was in my inbox prior to the release of part 5 of the cursed raven’s tale. Since the Jade Simping Saga is inherently tied to the story of the cursed raven, this message was what prompted the addition of Rook as a main character. (...Given the recent context of Raven’s backstory, this series does not seem nearly as light-hearted as it once was.)

With a name and face to now put to Miss Raven, I shall be changing minor things (such a pronouns and capitalization of raven) to reflect her character.

I would recommend reading this installment and this installment prior to this post.

Let the hunt begin.

The Writing Raven dies a little on the inside.

“...Oh. You mean the ring.” 

“Oui.”

“I took that off and shoved it into a drawer a while ago.” Raven holds up her right hand--and it is without adornment. “Even if it was a gift, wearing it for any longer would make my stomach churn. Looking at that thing brings back...unpleasant memories.”

His verdant eyes crease with delight. “Hohoh. So I see!”

She regards him with a long, hard stare--then folds her arms. “...I don’t know what the gossips of Pomefiore have been whispering in your ears, but I can assure you that no one but that slimy eel acknowledges the meaning behind the ring.”

“Is that so? Then perhaps there was no need for me to be quite so concerned,” Rook says with an airy laugh. “Do forgive me for the intrusive comments, mon petit oiseau. This hunter cannot help but be a bit nosy when his aimée is in danger of being snatched up in the clutches of a heinous fiend--”

“Now hold on,” Raven interrupts, “I never said anything about accepting your offer, either.”

“Ah, ma cherie, there is no need to be coy!” Rook declares with a wink and it’s a damn cute one. He pantomimes the motion of nocking an arrow and letting it fly--right into Raven’s chest. “The fact that you have chosen to cast aside Monsieur Mastermind’s affections...it means that you are fair prey~”

“Please do not shoot me down.”

“But of course.” Rook’s smile is as brilliant as the rising sun. “However--know that if you should ever fall, I will always be there to catch you safely in my arms! That is my promise to you, Mademoiselle Raven.”

“Promise...” Raven instinctively glances away--and she finds herself lingering on her right hand, where the ring once laid. The hunter follows her gaze.

“An observation--if you will allow, mon petit oiseau.” Rook leans down, peering into Raven’s wide, amber eyes. Golden locks tumble over his face, and his lips unfurl into a toothy grin.

“...What is it?”

“Your words and your actions betray each other. A beautiful contradiction, but a contradiction nonetheless,” Rook notes. “Perhaps there are words still left unspoken, buried in the recesses of your heart--words which you struggle to set free into the sky.”

“He has hurt you dearly--I can understand why you would be cautious to spread your wings and fly again into a storm that has struck you down once before. But I am not Monsieur Mastermind.”

“I would never dare dream of harming such a  magnifique creature such as yourself. I will protect you. I will tell you only the truth. I will heal the scars that he has left upon your fragile little heart.”

He gingerly takes Raven’s hands in his and squeezes. His eyes are half-lidded, but not once has his gaze strayed.

“Throw caution to the wind, ma cherie. Be honest with yourself. Forget him, and accept me.”

“I...”

“Three words, eight letters. Say it, and I am yours.”

Rook has never looked so fierce, so determined.

As handsome and pure as a prince from a fairy tale.

And yet, and yet...! Those same three words that would set his heart aflutter are the same three words that will kill her.

She hesitates.

Quivers.

Fear coating her tongue.

“I...I can’t.”

Raven pries her hands back and gently pushes him away--and he lets her go. Easily--yet Rook continues to watch her, his lips curved into a small smile. Gently coaxing her.

“It’s not you, or Jade,” Raven mumbles, wringing her hands together. She takes a deep breath and forces her racing heart down. “It’s...it’s me. I do not think I am...ready. I have scarcely experienced school life to begin with--and when it comes to matters of romance, I am nothing more than a newly hatched chick.”

“I see.” Rook nods, satisfied with the answer.

He has a talent for that, Raven realizes. Jade takes her words--and her breath--away, but Rook has a talent for drawing out what she tries to keep buried.

“If that is the case, then I will drop the issue for today~” he chirps, tipping his hat. His expression suddenly becomes serious again. “Mon petit oiseau.”

“...Yes?”

“Do not think this means I will relent. What sort of hunter would I be if I were to give up the chase so easily?”

“Right. Of course. I expected nothing less from you.”

“Hohoh. One day, you will be comfortable and worldly enough to leave your cage and brave the storm once more--and when you do, I will welcome you with open arms.” Rook waves his arm in a wide arc and cheekily adds, “We shall feast upon the flesh of eel upon a bed of rice to celebrate our union!”

Raven offers him a wary smile. “Er...sure.”

"Ah-CHOO!”

“Ne, ne, Jaaade, do you have a cold or somethin’?”

“...No, not at all. I just felt something rather unpleasant just now--like something akin to a pest crawling on my skin.”

“Ehhhh? Where’s that pest, huh? Do you want me to beat it bloody for ya?”

“It is simply a feeling--a metaphor, Floyd. I am certain it is nothing, fufu.”

“Awww, I wanted to punch something.”

“Focus on serving fruit punch, if you must fixate on any kind of punch at all.”

“Boooo~ Fruit punch is lame!”

“You two, less chatting and more working!”

“As you wish.”

“Fiiine.”

[breezclaire]

I’ve been wanting to post this little Merthur teaser for a while now...

Summary:

Mordred, a young fire fairy, has dreamed of meeting his idol, Merlin Emrys, his whole life. Now having finally transferred to Camelot, Albion’s most prestigious institute for fairy and specialist training, his dreams are finally coming to fruition.  Now if only he could summon the courage to utter more than a few words to the man, he’d be set.

Where first year students focused on discovering their primary element, second year is where the real fun begins. Fairies and Specialists are partnered up and must learn to become one fighting unit. To inspire the incoming class, instructors Arthur Pendragon and Merlin Emrys put on a demonstration the students will never forget.

But things don’t always go according to plan, and after a malfunction in the battlefield,  Merlin sets down on a dark path and Arthur struggles to ensure he doesn’t lose his husband forever.

A little story blending characters of (BBC) Merlin with the Fate: The Winx Saga universe. Featuring Fire Fairy!Arthur and Specialist!Merlin (complete with Dragonlord awesomeness).

**Work in Progress**

Estimated word count: 30,000-50,000

Will be looking for a beta once complete

---

Chapter 1 snippet: [Combat Demonstration]

In the centre of the maze was a small clearing where two men stood back-to-back. One was blond with broad shoulders, dressed in a blood red shirt, dark pants, and black combat boots. He seemed to be standing quite stiffly with his large arms folded across his chest. The other man looked more heavily armed - an obvious indicator of a specialist. Though he was slender, he was far from scrawny. He was dressed in a black bodysuit of armour that hugged every curve and exposed every muscle on his body, the only pop of colour was a dark red snood that hung loosely around his neck. He had twin swords strapped across his back, and looked to have a steady supply of smaller knives stashed in holders on his thighs. Where the blond stood perfectly still, the dark-haired man stood casually with his arms at either side, and seemed to sway in the breezy. He reached up with a gloved hand up to comb through his hair, leaving it spiked in all directions.

“Handsome, aren’t they?” Asked a voice. Mordred shook his head and turned away when Freya leaned in beside him. He closed his mouth, suddenly aware he’d been gaping much too long at the specialist. 

On his other side, Elena crossed her arms over the railings. “Arthur and Merlin are the instructors for fairy-specialist matches. They both graduated at the top of their classes and received high praise in combat operations. They’re said to have the strongest bond of their generation. More importantly.” Elena winked. “They’re the best-looking couple on campus.”

“Couple?” Mordred asked in surprise, suddenly feeling his stomach in knots. 

“It’s an unfortunate fact, although not unjustified. They are...perfect for each other.” Vivian spoke with a begrudging attitude and Mordred could tell she had a mixture of love and hate aimed at the men. He wondered if it had anything to do with her love of this so-called Prince Arthur and jealousy of his bond to Merlin. 

If Mordred were to be perfectly honest with himself --although he’d never say it aloud-- he could understand her feelings. After years of reading of his hero and finally getting to see him in person, even from afar, was a dream come true. Hearing he belonged to someone else left a bitter taste in his mouth. Mordred bit back a flare of jealousy, breathing through the rising heat in his core.

Gilli peered down at the valley with look of indifference. “It’s only logical that a strong fairy would be matched with an equally strong specialist,” He said. “I hear they were chosen to represent all of Camelot when the Kingdoms of Albion gathered. Apparently they were responsible for showing the Council the true power of a fairy-specialist bond. They had only been bonded for half a year when that happened.”

They all stared down in silence as the rest of the students filled in the perimeter of the valley, everyone finding a place against the railings. Their group leader -- “Guinevere, or Gwen for short,” Elena has said-- began to speak. When she spoke, her voice filled the entire valley, and it was crystal clear as if she were standing beside each and every student at once. 

“When you first came to Camelot, many of you had only just begun testing your abilities and begun understanding the power you possess. You practiced control and honed your primary element through practice and force of will. Some of you held great power but lacked control. Some of you struggled to release control and open yourselves to the understanding of the full spectrum of your powers.

“As you enter your second year, we will continue to build on these skills, and some of you may even awaken additional elemental abilities. Some of you may instead delve deeper and discover sub-elemental strengths.” Gwen turned her attention to the men in the valley. Arthur, arms still crossed tightly against his chest, returned a nod and stepped forward. As he spoke, he let his arms drop, gesturing along to add emphasis to his words. It was now Merlin’s turn to cross his arms, bowing his head as if entering a trance, and Mordred could understand why. When Arthur spoke, he spoke with command, strong and sure and without hesitation. Each word had purpose.

“As fairies, you hold an incredible connection to nature. Magic is all around us; it drifts in the air, through the rivers and streams, and runs deep through the earth. Even the most juvenile fairy can summon his or her element with strong enough emotion. As Albion’s future, you must continue your training so that you may one day join others before you as leaders of our land. As fairies, it is your duty to maintain peace and balance throughout the land.

“However, even the most powerful fairy has their limitations. You will have learned by now that magic is not infinite, and can be depleted. Some of you may still struggle with focus when pulling a single raindrop from a storm or lighting a single blade of grass from a dry field. The more complex an action, the more mental focus is required. And while your mind is moving a mile a minute, or you’ve just performed a magically taxing feat, your physical body becomes compromised. It doesn’t matter how strong you think you are if your enemies can catch and incapacitate you when you’re vulnerable.”

Arthur extended an arm in the direction of his partner.

“Specialists, while lacking in elemental magical ability, embody primal instincts and reflexes far beyond that of any man or fairy. In the heat of battle, their speed and strength can make all the difference in who emerges victorious. Outside the battlefield, they are responsible for furthering Albion’s technology and bringing each generation forward so that we remain ahead of those who threaten the peace.

“In today’s demonstration, you may see something you’ve never seen before - the Burned Ones. Rest assured these are only shells of the real thing. They are conjured from Specialist Technology as training dummies; however, it doesn’t mean they don’t fight back. This year’s final exam will test your abilities in combat and test how well you and your partner work together to defeat a common enemy. Watch carefully and you might just learn something.”

Arthur turned his back on the crowd and walked back to his place behind Merlin. The men prepared themselves for the battle. Merlin opened his eyes and dropped his arms to his sides tilting his head from side to side. Mordred absently wondered if it was out of nerves, or impatience. Unfortunately he was too far away to make out much of a facial expression, although he did remember reading that specialists were naturally more fidgety of the two and did not enjoy staying still for too long.

A hush fell across the crowd and the growing silence made the air feel tense. He could feel the others tense beside him. Gilli and George let out audible gulps. Even Vivian seemed to shy away from the railing, choosing instead to step slightly behind Elena. Sick with unease, Mordred scanned the valley, desperate to find the source of tension. He could see others matching his actions.

A scream echoed through the valley.

One by one, Burned Ones emerged from the hedges. They moved erratically, staggering forward as if moving in incredible pain. Mordred took in the sight of the creatures. They had humanoid features, walking on two legs, although some chose to crawl on all fours. They were creatures of darkened flesh, misshapen with protruding bones and oozing fluids. Some even had dents and holes through their bodies. Their arms were long and hung as low as their knees, finished with hands with long, dagger-sharp nails. They stalked alone, turning away from one another when they met up. 

The smell of burnt flesh rose from the valley, and many  students covered their faces from the stench. Mordred pulled his scarf above his nose, but was otherwise unable to look away from the sight. There were about half a dozen creatures in the valley now, each slowly making their way to the centre. There was one that finally reached the clearing, pausing briefly as it stood in direct sight of the fairy. The duo remained standing back to back, and from where he stood, Mordred had a clear view of Merlin, who cocked his head ever so slightly to glimpse at the creature behind him. The creature reared his head in a horrid screech and launched itself forward.

Arthur widened his stance, stepping forward towards the advance. Mordred sensed the fire rise around his hands even before he saw it. Merlin scooped low, launching forth a bola to entangle the creature’s legs. Arthur sent a quick burst of fire at the creature, burning it from the inside out.

The creatures continued to advance in succession, and all eyes were trained on the team below. The two men moved seamlessly around one another. When one advanced for an attack, the other circled around to defend the other’s back. The specialist always remained in front of the fairy, creating almost an invisible barrier in which he occupied the outer circle. He would defend with an easy swing of his swords and push back any oncoming attackers until the fire fairy could recharge for the final blow. 

Mordred couldn’t help but think of the beauty of it all. The fire reached out like ribbons, curving around Merlin like a second skin, wrapping around and passing him like a promise to do no harm. Where Arthur’s movements were strong and centred, Merlin moved like a whip. One moment he’d be almost three body lengths away from his fairy, only to slingshot back, seamlessly ducking around Arthur to kick and launch another attack to a Burned One who’d appeared behind just a moment ago. There was a moment of fear when Mordred saw a Burned One leap down towards Arthur, only to be pierced through the chest by Merlin’s sword and catapulted back beyond the hedgeline. The most amazing part was that the two moved in complete silence. No “hey, look out behind you” or “cover me!” It was as if they were in complete control of their surroundings, even at the centre of chaos.

The advances seemed to come faster now, and the men were often fending off two or more creatures at a time. Gradually the attacks stopped, but only because the Burned Ones changed tactics.

“They’re not supposed to do this,” Vivian whispered behind him. Mordred spared a moment’s glance back in question. “Burned Ones are loners. They never attack in unison. They never hunt in packs.”

“T-there must be some mistake,” George shook his head in disbelief as the Burned Ones continued to collect themselves. Soon the men were completely surrounded. Even so, the monsters continued the swarm, crawling over one another to create some awful wall of bodies. “Shouldn’t we be calling for help? How can they stay so calm?”

The final swarm continued to build in the centre of the valley, and Mordred found he wasn’t alone in pressing up against the railing in anticipation of how the final surge would be dealt with. A few students shouted in protest at the sight, unbelieving of the situation. Cries of horror echoed in the valley, but the fairy and specialist team remained silent. Even Gilli, who seemed almost robotic through the whole demonstration, tightened his grip on the railing. Freya and Elena were gripping onto each other so tightly Mordred was worried they’d draw blood.

It was rumoured that Burned Ones could attack in packs when under the influence of greater powers, and whether or not the demonstration meant for this to happen, it was still a bizarre and chilling sight. It was intimidating enough of a sight from their perch on the edge of the valley, and Mordred had no envy for the two men who now stood surrounded by a wall of deadly monsters.

But no sooner had the pack come to a halt, did the men change positions. The energy seemed to shift as the fairy stepped forward and the specialist took a step back. Arthur waved his arms in a flourish, sending a circle of fire around them and raising the wall higher and higher. It continued to rise until it surpassed the wall of Burned Ones. Simultaneously, a silent buzz charged the air, causing a few students to rub their arms or pat themselves down where their hair began to stand. Mordred leaned closer over the railing, barely glimpsing the blue-white jolts of electricity woven into the wall of fire. This must be an example of secondary elemental abilities, Mordred thought. A few of the Burned Ones charged the wall, testing the barrier, and Mordred was relieved when he saw them fry instantly. The rest backed up, seeming to sense the change. 

Suddenly, the air seemed to thicken and vibrate. Soon the earth began to quake. The specialist reared his head back and roared:

"O drakon, e male so ftengometta tesd'hup'anankes!"

For the moment, Mordred was sure he’d lost his hearing. The air seemed to have disappeared. The trees no longer swayed. All hints of forest life seemed to fade far into the distance.

Suddenly, a low swoop, sounded through the valley. 

Swoop.

Swoop swoop.

Growing stronger and faster the sound of beating wings came closer and closer until --

“A dragon!” Someone cried out, and students began to shuffle towards the safety of the forest. Guinevere held out a hand, and slowly the students simpered down. Many still had their attention fixed on the sky, though they had now curbed their desire to escape. The dragon was slender and white, blending in almost completely with the clouds. In one smooth motion, it tucked its wings and plummeted into the valley, flaring them out just before it crashed into the ground. It reared its head and unleashed an incredible stream of fire through the valley.

Mordred couldn’t breathe.

The maze. The Burned Ones. Arthur. Merlin. Everyone and everything in the valley became completely engulfed in flame. The fire was so intense Mordred could feel the heat penetrate deep into his bones. The flames were more intense than any fire he’d ever been able to conjure. He could only pray that his hero would survive. Had Merlin summoned this creature? Did he intend to be at the heart of his dragon’s fire? Mordred’s mind was racing and he counted his breaths until he could see into the valley again.

As the flames died down, the students slowly regained their composure. Vivian and George had almost disappeared in the treeline behind him, huddling against a nearby tree trunk. Freya and Elena had also huddled together, although they remained standing. Gilli had stepped away from the railings when the heat became too much, but remained staring into the valley. Mordred remained closest to the railing, most likely protected because of his fire fairy blood. The valley was a complete devastation. The fire had burned away the greenery to ash. The Burned Ones now laid as a circle of dust. It was incredible that anything remained.

In the centre of the maze, an orb of fire remained burning. Remnants of dragon fire seem to trail from the earth to the centre orb and soon all traces of dragon fire extinguished. Slowly, the orb began to die, sinking into the ground and vanishing with the breeze. 

In the centre stood the two men completely unharmed, a pearl-white dragon curled protectively around them. 

The cheers that erupted from above the valley were deafening. Before he could protest, Mordred found himself pulled into a group hug with his friends around him. Students everywhere were shouting praises, whistling, hooting, and flailing their arms in excitement. Some were just happy to have survived and remained slumped on the ground. Others thanked the angels they were still alive. Everyone turned when the dragon rose from its position and lifted off the ground, soon vanishing into the clouds above.

“Incredible!” Elena gasped. She, like many others, was still panting from the heat and adrenaline. “That was...It was just so...incredible!” Mordred could only nod, not trusting himself to speak just yet. Beside him, Freya nodded enthusiastically at Elena’s words.

“I told you he was amazing.” Vivian was beaming, completely ignoring how her hair stuck up on one side. “Arthur is so cool! I can’t wait to meet him!”

“I must say,” George said, smoothing down his shirt, cheeks pink from excitement. “I never expected to see a Dragonlord in action, let alone on the first day of the school year. This is truly a gift. A memory of a lifetime!”

“He’s amazing.” Gilli wore a small smile on his face. He looked around the group, nodding enthusiastically. “Amazing.”

“And we get to learn from them,” Elena echoed what they were all thinking. “This is going to be the best year ever!”

[iffeelscouldkill]

say what we wanna do, make it all come true (chapter 2)

A/N: In my original notes for this fic I had written that Chapter 3 might be rolled into Chapter 2 depending on length because I thought that Chapter 2 was going to be super short. *laughs wildly in 7.1k-long chapter* But this is my favourite chapter of the fic, so it's nice that we get to spend extra time with it!

No particular content warnings for this; everything’s pretty chill. Enjoy! <3

Link to Chapter One | Read on AO3

“That, dear listeners, was ‘Landers Never Stand Down’, the hit single – or should that be anthem? – by beloved indie band Rumor, from their debut album, ‘Ghost Squid’. If you’re just joining us, I’m Piper Tanaka, and this is Radio Indie, Folk and Techno. With us in the studio are Rumor frontwoman Sana Tripathi-”

“Hello again.”

“-and bassist Arkady Patel. We’ve just been hearing the stunning true story of how the band added a new member to its line-up, drummer Violet Liu, after she was discovered trying to obtain confidential files in order to blow the whistle on her employer, the notorious IGR Corp, and its development of an unethical surveillance device.”

“Isn’t that, really, the only logical way to join a band?” Kestrel quipped.

“It sure worked out well for the Rumor crew!” said Piper. “On a more musical note, though – and yes, that pun was intended – that was a great track we just heard. I’m curious about the name you picked for your debut album; is there a story there?”

Sana glanced at Arkady, amused. “Call it an in joke,” she said. “We were originally going to go with ‘In the Deep’, since there’s kind of a loose space theme to the first album, and then… after rehearsal one day, we were just riffing on what kind of creatures might live out in the depths of outer space-” They had also been pretty drunk at the time, but she didn’t need to mention that live on air. “-and Arkady suggested that maybe there’d be giant squid, like in the depths of the ocean.”

“Space squid!” Piper enthused. “Now there’s a concept I can get behind.”

“Right, but Violet, who is our resident science expert – she has a Masters in Molecular Biology–”

“Fancy. Love a woman of science.”

“-pointed out that a squid could never propel itself in a vacuum. Unless it was, you know, a ghost squid.”

“How much had you guys been drinking?” Kestrel asked shrewdly. Arkady coughed.

“It was a dumb joke, but we thought it would make a pretty unique name for a first album,” she finished.

“You were right there!” said Piper brightly. “Then, of course, there’s your upcoming second album, which we’ve heard will be titled ‘More Than a Rumor’.”

“That’s right,” Sana confirmed. “We’ve been working on some really cool material for this one, and we’re excited to bring it to you all.”

“We’ve been hearing some interesting talk about what exactly that material might be,” said Piper. “The discussion boards online are buzzing about one track, ‘The Saga of the House of Zravshen’, which is said to be a thirteen-minute-long “epic space opera ballad” written by Brian Jeeter.”

Arkady made a derisive noise. “It’ll be a thirteen-minute-long something, all right.”

“Arkady, maybe you could tell us about ‘Nanoswarm’,” said Kestrel slyly. “I’ve heard that you and Violet Liu collaborated closely on that track.”

“I – we didn’t – what I mean is, uh, it really wasn’t a formal – collaboration–”

Arkady’s transformation from self-assured to completely flustered was delightful to behold, even though Sana felt like she should maybe step in and save her best friend from herself.

“It was more of a, uh, sort of a side project – we just worked on it and it sounded pretty cool, so it, uh – went onto the album.”

“What I think is really great about ‘More Than a Rumor’,” Sana intervened smoothly, and Arkady let out a breath, sitting back in her chair, “is that there are various tracks where different band members get a chance to shine. Building on ‘Ghost Squid’, which was the introduction to the band as a whole, we really delve into different members’ specialisms in our second album, which has made the material really varied as a result. But at the same time, we’ve worked hard to give it a cohesive flow…”

---

Not everything about adding a new member to the band had been as seamless as that first set. They’d improvised together well over the course of a performance, sure, but there was a different quality to rehearsals now that there were five of them instead of four; they were still figuring out how to navigate each other, adapting routines and in-jokes to accommodate a new person.

A lot of their original material sounded different now with the addition of a keytar and a new drummer; Liu was more technically capable than Jeeter had been, and she also wasn’t content with just falling into a role that had been laid down for her. She had ideas, things she wanted to change, and they weren’t bad ideas, but they still bugged Arkady anyway. She was just attached to a lot of their old songs, that was all.

And okay, maybe she’d pushed back on a few suggestions during rehearsals in a way that had Sana raising an amused eyebrow at her and Krejjh pretending to duck and cover. To her credit, Liu didn’t just roll over and give up on her ideas at the first sign of resistance, sticking to her guns in a way that Arkady respected even if it was also annoying. Things never deteriorated too far, mainly because Sana was quick to play peacemaker, but there always seemed to be some kind of friction between the two of them. It was like an itch under Arkady’s skin whenever she was around Liu, quick to flare up.

Then there was the time that Liu had made an offhanded comment that, “Everyone here went to an underground concert or two in college, right?” in the context of discussing the kinds of set-ups that they’d performed with in the past. Arkady had said nothing, but could feel her teeth grinding as she played an overly loud riff on her bass. It was an innocuous enough comment on its own, but the easy presumptions behind it – the idea that everyone had had access to the same educational opportunities that Liu had had – were what pissed Arkady off.

But contradicting her would have meant talking about something that was personal to Arkady, something that cut way too close to the bone, and she didn’t want to do that. Liu hadn’t earned that from her. Instead, Jeeter made a joke about having been way too immersed in books to find time for concerts, and Sana tactfully steered the conversation out of dangerous waters.

After the rehearsal, she’d pulled Arkady aside. “If you want me to talk to her about—”

Arkady shook her head. “It’s not a big deal. Really,” she added at Sana’s unconvinced look. “It was a stupid assumption, but I can let it go. I’d rather just… let it go.”

They were in a band together, but that didn’t mean they had to be best friends. Arkady could maintain a civil working relationship. It didn’t matter what she’d… thought when she first met Liu, or what Liu might have been about to say to her in the bar. All of that was in the past, so there was no point dwelling on it. All Arkady needed to do was work with Liu within the context of the band; she could do that.

Until one afternoon when Arkady arrived early for rehearsal without really meaning to, and found that the only other person in the warehouse was Liu, who was setting up her drumkit. Before Arkady could turn around and pretend she’d never been there, Liu looked up and spotted her.

“Oh… hey. I was just planning to run through a few drum lines before the rehearsal… try some stuff out,” she said.

“Right,” Arkady said, casting about for an excuse that would get her out of the warehouse until the others arrived. “Uh, I’m gonna go get some coffee from the-”

“Arkady, listen, can we, uh… Can we clear the air between us?” Liu asked, the last few words coming out all in a rush.

Arkady froze. “Clear… what air?” she asked, hoping to god that Liu would say something innocuous about why she thought the drum line on Fear for the Storm needed work.

No such luck. “Look, I get that you’re not… thrilled with having me in the band,” Liu said, quietly, though her voice still carried in the echoey space. “I’ve been in a lot of workplace environments where I’m not welcome, so I… know how to spot the signs. And maybe I’m being hypersensitive, or looking for things to worry about, but something still feels off between us, so whatever it is, can we just talk about it and deal with it? Please?”

Arkady’s chest clenched at Liu’s mention of not being welcome in ‘workplace environments’. Damn it, she didn’t want to make Liu feel the same way she’d felt in whatever white dudebro-filled tech companies she’d worked for. But she also didn’t want to go into the reasons why she wasn’t always a ray of sunshine when they interacted. There was no way that that conversation was going to make anything better.

“I don’t have a problem with you being in the band. Really,” she said instead. “If it comes off that way, it’s just because… Sana and I worked on a lot of those early songs together, and I’m… attached to how they sound. That’s all.”

“So… this is really just a musical disagreement?” said Liu, sounding unconvinced. “Because it feels like there’s… something else. I know you’re not the biggest fan of my former employer – and I mean, me neither – but I figure if it bothered you that much, you wouldn’t have come to help me when Seiders was threatening me-”

“I wasn’t going to just let you die,” Arkady said, nettled. “And no, I’m not in the habit of judging people for where they work. I’ve worked my fair share of jobs for shitty employers just to get by.” She shrugged. Then, almost without meaning to, she added, “Of course, I didn’t have the choice that you probably had…”

Liu frowned, but more like she was confused than like she was annoyed by Arkady’s comment. “What do you mean?”

Arkady sighed. “Not everyone went to college, Liu,” she said. “I’m a high school dropout. So no, I didn’t go to any underground concerts. Or any kind of gigs in college.”

Liu’s eyes widened as her comment from earlier came back to her. “Oh my god,” she groaned, putting her hand to her head. “I am so sorry, Arkady – I should know better than to make assumptions like that. I was just – I’d been talking to Brian about his studies and how he met Krejjh doing fieldwork, and I guess I assumed you guys had all met in college-”

Arkady barked out a laugh, too startled to even really be annoyed. “What, you thought that I could’ve been studying alongside Jeeter? You know he went to Brightwell, right? That elite college that’s supposed to be harder than Harvard to get into?”

Liu shrugged like the idea was actually plausible and not something that sounded like part of a bizarre alternate reality. “Yeah, I don’t see why not.” Then, quickly, as if she was afraid that this might have offended Arkady even more, she added, “But like I said – I really shouldn’t have assumed, and I’m sorry – I know better than that. I was only able to go to the college I did because I won a scholarship.”

Keen to move away from the topic of Arkady possibly having gone to Brightwell – because really, what – Arkady said, “You went to uh, that all-girls college, right? Harmony?” She vaguely remembered overhearing a conversation between Liu and Jeeter where Liu had talked about there being a Latin motto. “It sounded… interesting.”

Liu pulled a face. “Yeah, that’s one word for it.” She went on almost shyly, like she was confessing to a deeply-held secret, “I would have liked to study something more artistic – music, maybe – or at least do more extra-curriculars, but… I got that scholarship, and I was under a lot of pressure from my parents to do something ‘worthwhile’. Plus, I really wanted to show the kids who said I only got that scholarship because I was ‘a minority’.” There was an anger and a bitterness and a tiredness underlying those last two words that Arkady knew far too well.

“They what,” she spat out. God, was she glad she’d never been to college. Then again, she’d worked at places where she’d come up against the exact same attitude.

“Yeah,” Liu said wearily, fiddling with the drumsticks she was holding. “It wasn’t all bad, though. Being away at college was the first time I was really able to be myself – play the drums, be out. I got this haircut in my freshman year that was just – wild, it was awful.” She laughed, though Arkady barely heard her, her heartbeat suddenly pounding in her ears at the word ‘out’. God, Patel, get a grip. “My parents never liked the drums, they thought they were too – un-feminine,” she pulled a face again. “I play the flute, too, but I’m bad at it.”

“We should add that into the line-up,” said Arkady, to distract herself from thinking about Violet’s – Liu’s – flushed cheeks and her smile as she talked about her old haircut. “Sana can write a flute part.”

“Oh god, no,” Liu said, laughing again. “I don’t even have my flute any more, I sold it in grad school.”

“So… if you went to grad school… you can’t have hated it that much, right?” Arkady asked. “Uh – the biology, not the – flute playing.”

“Oh, no, I love biology,” Liu enthused. “It’s the study of living things – what’s not to love? Grad school itself, though, was…” She pulled a face. “I came close to quitting, a few times.”

“What happened?” Arkady asked. They were pretty far off their original subject by now, and Arkady was willing to admit to herself (and only herself) that maybe she was enjoying the conversation. It was all in the name of building better inter-band relationships, of course. Sana would be thrilled that they were bonding like this.

Liu sighed. “Let’s just say there were a few people on my course who were determined to let me know I didn’t belong. We had a lab work module where we were supposed to carry out an experiment as a group, and… I got put in charge of our group of six. My teammates would do things like pretend not to understand my instructions, or move things I needed to shelves I couldn’t reach… make comments they knew I could overhear… Growing up with an anxiety disorder, everyone’s always telling you not to worry – you learn to doubt your own thoughts. And my advisor just dismissed my concerns as ‘over-sensitivity’, so…” Arkady’s eyes narrowed further with every word that Liu spoke. “It was too late for me to transfer to another module. In the end I wound up carrying the whole project basically by myself.”

Liu gave Arkady a weak smile. “So, y’know, you didn’t miss out on much. I interned for a pharmaceutical company for a couple of years after college, did some work as a research assistant. When I got the job offer from IGR Corp, I felt like I’d finally made it – and look how that turned out.”

“Hey, it’s not your fault that IGR Corp turned out to be a special brand of greedy, soul-sucking and unethical,” said Arkady bluntly – even though she’d previously thought that maybe Liu could have had less awful taste in employers. “That’s on them. Look… I know a thing or two about soul-sucking workplaces myself.”

Arkady hadn’t intended this to turn into Personal Story Hour, but at the same time she felt like she should at least offer something after Liu had opened up about her time in college. She hadn’t needed to justify herself; she could just have apologised and left it at that. Instead, she’d shared something that Arkady suspected she didn’t talk about to a lot of people.

“The last job I worked before Sana and I started Rumor was for Telemachus Enterprises,” Arkady said, and Liu’s eyes widened in recognition.

“The global consulting firm? That’s very… well…”

“Capitalist? Soullessly corporate?” Arkady finished for her.

“I was going to say stable,” Liu said diplomatically.

“Sure, as long as you also like ladder-climbing, backstabbing and toxic work environments,” said Arkady. “I was an assistant, doing all the crap work like photocopying, fetching coffee, making calls, scheduling appointments and dealing with angry clients. It was the kind of job you get to get a ‘foothold’ in the world of business, and all of the other assistants were recent college grads who were way younger than me. I hated it.”

Liu nodded, listening intently, not offering any kind of commentary or judgement.

“Playing the bass was kind of the only thing that kept me sane, so… I used to go down to these shitty clubs at night and play, sometimes straight from work because the overtime was ridiculous. I’d join up with a couple of other musicians and do jam sessions, or sometimes play solo stuff. I’d sing, sometimes, too,” she added, a little self-consciously, even though she sang backing vocals on most of Rumor’s songs, and everyone in the band had heard her sing.

“I moved around a lot, never performed at the same place two nights in a row, so that no-one got to know me too well. I used to use different stage names – my favourite was Duchess Calpurnia Higginsworth-Cobb.”

Liu burst out laughing. “You didn’t really tell people that was your name?”

“Drunk people will believe anything,” Arkady told her. “I’m still known as ‘Duchess’ in a few places. It was a precaution, in case anything got back to my work, but in the end… the person who recognised me was someone I hadn’t seen in over a decade. Sana.”

Liu’s eyes widened. “You guys go back that far?”

“Kind of,” Arkady said. “It’s a long story–” delving into the tale of The Landing and her and Sana’s shared history definitely felt like it would be going a step too far – “but uh, I used to do work at a tattoo parlour that Sana came to a few times. I didn’t think she’d really noticed me at the time, but she remembered me well enough that when I played at a club near her workplace, she recognised me. She managed to catch a few more of my performances, figure out where I’d be, and one night she showed up with her guitar, and… we played together.”

Arkady smiled a little, remembering that night, the spark she’d felt as soon as they started to play. The drummer had been awful, some white asshole named Ricky who thought he was God’s gift to music – and wasn’t – but they’d sounded like magic anyway.

“Somehow she managed to figure out where I worked, showed up one day, invited me to get lunch, and after she found out how much I hated it there, she told me I should quit so that we could start a band,” Arkady said.

“And you did?” Liu asked, sounding half impressed, half scandalised.

“I really hated that job,” Arkady said. “Besides, the Capt- Sana can be really persuasive. We joke about her motivational speeches, but she’s…” Arkady hated to admit this, because it sounded so goddamn cheesy, but there wasn’t another word to describe it. “…inspirational.”

Liu smiled. “Yeah, I can tell. She seems like that kind of person.”

“We wrote a lot of our early songs together during that time,” Arkady said. “‘Landers Never Stand Down’, ‘Fear for the Storm’… they kind of – ugh, this is going to sound so corny, but they were about our hope for something better. So… that’s why I’m weird about changing them.”

Liu’s expression softened. “I completely get it. Look, I know that all of this has been pretty sudden – me joining the band, us trying to put together an album – and I’d understand if you wanted me to… back off a little. I was throwing out ideas for things that I thought would sound good with our new line-up, but I should have appreciated that these aren’t just songs to you and Sana.”

“No, it’s – you’re – okay,” Arkady said awkwardly. “You’re fine. They’re… they’re uh, really…” God, Arkady, just spit it out. People pay each other compliments all the time – it doesn’t have to mean anything. (Even if you might want it to mean something). “They’re really good. Ideas, I mean. And the others seem to like them! So… don’t stop on my account.”

Arkady’s urge to just leave the building after finally stumbling through that awkward admission was pretty strong, but she managed to resist. Which turned out to be worth it to see the small, pleased smile unfolding on Liu’s face. It was a different kind of smile to the one that she wore when the Captain paid her a compliment, though Arkady couldn’t have said exactly how. It just felt… personal to her.

“Well, in that case,” said Liu. “I had this idea I really wanted to try out on ‘Landers’, and… I’d love to get your thoughts? On how it sounds?”

Which was how, when Sana showed up for the start of the rehearsal fifteen minutes later, Arkady and Violet came to be mid-debate about the merits of speeding up the tempo of the drum line in the first half of the second verse, Arkady singing Sana’s part of the vocals to illustrate her point.

“Am I late?” Sana joked, throwing Arkady an amused glance. “Sorry, I didn’t realise practice was starting early.”

“The cool kids show up to practice a half hour early to go over new drum lines,” Arkady deadpanned, and Liu laughed. Sana smiled as she brought out her guitar.

“What you were playing just then sounded really good – can you go over it again?”

The conversation with Liu didn’t magically fix everything between them, but the tension eased up significantly after that, and it became easier for Arkady and Liu to come to a compromise whenever they disagreed. The album started to come together much more quickly, and when Red Gregor stopped by (which he did a lot more than he strictly needed to as the head of their record label, and Arkady suspected he was mostly there to see Sana), he was full of praise for the new arrangements.

It also somehow became a habit for Arkady to start showing up early to rehearsal. She told herself it was because the line in the coffee shop was easier to deal with at that time, and it was true that at some point she’d bought enough coffee for both her and Violet to have Violet’s regular order memorised; but it also had something to do with the fact that more often than not, Violet would arrive while she was setting up, or vice versa, and they’d run through the parts that had been bugging them, each lending the other an honest and unjudgemental ear. Sometimes they’d play around with something new, or improvise, trying on new techniques and styles for size.

Arkady honestly hadn’t had this much fun experimenting with music since those first early, heady days with Sana, when they started to lay down exactly what kind of performers they wanted to be. It was different with Violet – they had a different relationship, a different vibe – but there was still something about their sessions that felt similar, like they were breaking new ground.

One day, Arkady had been messing around with a bass line that she couldn’t get out of her head – she’d been thinking of adding it to ‘The Carmen Gambit’, one of the band’s originals that Jeeter had helped write, but it didn’t really fit. She liked how it sounded on its own, though. Liu had been listening, head tilted to one side, which Arkady didn’t really think anything of until quietly, underneath the bass line, Violet started to add a drum part.

Arkady was startled, mostly by how well the two fit together; after a slight fumble, she carried on playing, improvising and adding a couple of variations to the bass line when she ran out of material. Liu smoothly changed up the rhythm of the drum line to match just a second later, and Arkady realised that they had something that almost sounded like… a real piece of music. Something organic, something that flowed and moved and changed with-

Crap. Arkady came to a stop at the end of a section as she realised she didn’t have any idea what to play next. “Uh…” She threw an apologetic glance in Violet’s direction. “I haven’t really figured out what comes after that.”

Violet nodded, not seeming put out by this. “What about…” She hummed the end section of the melody that Arkady had been playing, and then another phrase that almost mirrored it. “Actually, that part could come before the-”

“Right, right-” Arkady understood Violet’s meaning, and quickly picked up the tune on her bass.

The song (well, technically it was an instrumental) they were writing didn’t have a name for the first few days. Arkady and Violet would pick up where they left off each time they came to rehearsal, and would throw around ideas for additions and changes, discussing the overall sound and vibe, but it didn’t feel like there was a need to put a name to it.

Then in the middle of one of these discussions, Violet started scribbling something in a notebook, and Arkady realised she was writing down their song. She peered curiously at the letters and notes, and Violet grimaced self-consciously.

“I’m not sure if I’ve got all of the bass chords right,” she admitted, tilting the notebook so Arkady could see it better. “Feel free to correct any bits that are wrong, I was mostly trying to get the drum part down for my own benefit. My memory’s not as good as yours is.”

Arkady hesitated. She was tempted to lie and say the notation was fine; Violet would accept it, and it probably wouldn’t come up again. There was a time when she would have done it without a second’s thought. But Violet already knew that Arkady had dropped out of high school; knew bits and pieces of her background, if not the whole story; and Arkady had to admit that she’d been enjoying being herself more around Violet. She didn’t want to backtrack on that.

“I never really learned to read sheet music,” she admitted. “I can recognise a few chords, but… I mostly learned how to play from YouTube videos, so it always seemed easier to just watch someone else play the chords, and learn which ones went with which songs, and… for performances I always had to memorise stuff anyway, so, um.” Arkady was rambling, and Violet was staring at her, which was possibly not good. “There didn’t seem much point in having it written down.”

“So… you never had a bass teacher?” Violet said slowly. “All of your playing, your singing – it’s all self-taught?”

“Uh,” Arkady cringed. “Yes?”

“Wow,” Violet said, and Arkady suddenly realised that she was dumbfounded because she was impressed, not because she’d just realised she was playing with an amateur. “That’s… really impressive.”

Arkady fidgeted, uncomfortable with the pure admiration in Violet’s gaze. “It’s not really – I mean sure, I put in a lot of hours, but so does every musician,” she hedged. “It wasn’t anything special, I just – couldn’t afford to pay for classes.”

She braced herself for an awkward silence to follow, but instead Violet nodded. “No, you’re right, everyone has to put in the work if they want to improve,” she agreed. “But I imagine that it would be harder to motivate yourself when it’s just you and the instrument.”

Arkady shrugged her shoulder slightly. “It wasn’t so bad. It helped that I enjoyed it, I guess.” After the disaster that was her high school education, it had been a relief to find something she’d felt like she was good at – and wasn’t being assessed on.

Violet smiled, and mercifully changed the topic by looking down at the notation she’d scribbled and saying lightly, “Well, now that it’s been written down, it feels like we should give it a name.”

Arkady thought about it. “Anything that’s shorter than whatever the hell it is Jeeter and Krejjh are working on,” she said, because Jeeter had been waxing lyrical about the ‘epic space opera ballad’ that he’d been composing with his fiancé. Apparently it was about a race of fictional aliens, and some of the lyrics were in a made-up alien language that Jeeter had invented. Arkady had no idea why Jeeter had such a dedicated following among their fans for the weird shit that he came up with, but there you were.

Violet grinned, tapping her pen against the space above the lines and notations. “So, one word, then. It’s got a pretty futuristic sound… What about ‘Cyberpunk’?”

Arkady couldn’t help grimacing a little bit. “Yeah, too clichéd,” Violet agreed. “Maybe something themed around space… ‘Supernova’?”

They tossed around a few other ideas, but none of them quite seemed to fit the mood of the song. Violet frowned down at the music she’d written, and Arkady was about to suggest they come back to it later when she said, “This might sound like a weird association for a piece of music, but I was reading a paper the other day on nanotechnology, you know, technology used at the atomic and molecular level?”

“Sounds kind of dry for bedtime reading, but I’m with you,” Arkady said.

Violet laughed, blushing a little. “Yeah, a friend from my Masters sent it to me; I still like to keep up with new developments in the field, and there are fascinating implications for biology. But I’m thinking, what if none of the space names fit because they’re too big, too grand? What if instead we went really small, like… ‘Nanobot’?”

“Nanobot…” Arkady turned the name over in her mind, thinking about the quick, intricate rhythms of the song they were creating together. It was a surprisingly good fit, but something about it felt off. Something about the ‘bot’ part was too… lonely. “What about ‘Nanoswarm’?”

Violet’s eyes widened slightly and a smile spread across her face. “Nanoswarm,” she said, and wrote the song title in blocky capitals above their music. “I like it.”

Both Red Gregor and Campbell came to rehearsal that night, which Arkady took as a sign that they were there to discuss something Important. Their album, ‘Ghost Squid’, was selling more copies than any of them had expected, and had actually got them some interview requests from indie music blogs and magazines. This seemed to be partly down to Red Gregor, who apparently had enough of a reputation as a business investor that his decision to start up a record label had attracted a lot of interest, and consequently a lot of interest in the first band he’d signed to it. But they’d also had some great reviews, including from Radio, Indie, Folk and Techno (also known as RIFT), the go-to station for all things indie music, who had covered it on their ‘Rave Review Hour’.

There’d also been a noticeably bigger audience at most of their gigs. They’d had a modest but dedicated following before Violet had joined the band, and were regulars at a couple of underground venues where they pulled decent crowds, plus one bar where Arkady had managed not to piss off the owner (the other four were… long stories); a bunch of people also streamed their music from various parts of the world. But since Ghost Squid came out, they’d started playing at (and filling) much bigger venues across a much wider area. It was fun, but also a little surreal.

“What’s the good word, Campbell?” Krejjh asked, leaning on their keyboard. “Are you here to tell us how much the people love us?”

Campbell’s lips twitched in amusement. “They love you a whole lot,” he said. “More every day.”

Krejjh fist-pumped, and Arkady asked, “So, what are you guys here for? Is this about ‘Ghost Squid 2: Electric Boogaloo’?”

They’d had a discussion with Red Gregor about beginning work on a second album; this one would take longer, since they’d had plenty of existing songs to draw on for ‘Ghost Squid’, and hadn’t needed to put together any new material. But, as Gregor had pointed out, it was better to start thinking about that sooner rather than later, and they’d been working on a few new songs anyway. So far, the second album was still nameless, but they’d taken to calling it by a range of joke nicknames.

Red Gregor grinned. “Sort of, in the sense that it’ll be good promo,” he said. Spreading his hands out to either side like a showman introducing his next act, he said grandly, “I’ve landed you a gig at the CUI Stadium.”

Jeeter’s mouth dropped open, Krejjh flailed and exclaimed, “Holy moley!”, and Violet repeated, “Stadium?!” in an almost horrified tone. Even Sana seemed surprised by the news.

“You actually got it?” she asked Red Gregor, who nodded.

Arkady’s eyes narrowed. “Okay, what’s the catch?” she asked. “They don’t let just anyone play the CUI Stadium.”

“No catch,” Campbell promised them. “Red has some contacts who tipped him off that the CUI is looking for some new, lesser-known talent to put on its billing. Once upon a time, the CUI had a reputation for scouting the best undiscovered bands and giving them a bigger stage – literally – and they feel they’ve been losing their touch.”

Put like that, it did make a kind of sense. “Cool, so who are we supporting?” Jeeter asked. “Oooh, maybe it’s Hremreh.”

Hremreh was a weird electronic band that Jeeter and Krejjh were completely obsessed with. Arkady rolled her eyes. “I hope the CUI has more taste than that.”

“Excuse you, Hremreh is an underrated gem of a band,” Krejjh retorted.

“The Destroyer?” Violet suggested jokingly. “They’re local.”

Arkady knew from having spent time with Violet that The Destroyer was one of her favourite bands from college, whose gigs she’d religiously attended during her freshman year. Everyone else looked interested but bemused, and Violet hurriedly added, “Uh, that was a bit of a niche joke. I used to go to their gigs a lot in college.”

“All great guesses,” Red Gregor said, “but you’re all missing one important piece of information. You’ll be the headline act.”

“What?” said Arkady.

“Heck yeah!” Krejjh exclaimed, and high-fived Jeeter.

“So, someone will be supporting us?” Violet said a little faintly.

“Red, exactly how many strings did you pull?” Sana asked, sounding halfway between amused and disapproving. Red Gregor held up his hands.

“I just talked to my contacts, I promise,” he said. “It gave me a chance to put your name forward, but that was all I needed to do. You guys have a great sound; they’re excited to have you on.”

Everything dissolved into a flurry of noise and celebration. Jeeter played a celebratory tune on his keytar that Arkady was fairly sure was from some video game, Krejjh whooped and slid their hands up the keys of their keyboard, and Campbell picked up Sana and spun her around, both of them and Red Gregor laughing. Violet caught Arkady’s eye, grinned, and did a little roll on one of her cymbals. Arkady huffed and rolled her eyes, but she couldn’t fight the smile that was trying to emerge.

“So, when is the gig?” Sana asked, flushed and catching her breath, after Campbell had put her down.

“A month from today,” Red told them. Sana straightened up.

“Wow, okay, we need to get rehearsing! Everyone—”

They quickly got into position, picking up instruments and drumsticks and plugging in amplifiers. Sana beamed around at the assembled band members.

“I just want to say how proud I am of all of you for what we’ve accomplished so far, and everything that lies ahead of us. I-”

“Not to head you off at the pass,” Arkady interrupted, sensing a long Sana Monologue was coming, “but didn’t you say we needed to get rehearsing? Maybe save the speech for after?”

Most people would have taken offence at being interrupted, but Sana, being Sana, smiled at Arkady. “Thank you for the reminder, Arkady. I am proud of you all, but I’ll tell you exactly how proud once we’re done.”

Rehearsal went well, everyone energetic and buoyed up from the good news. As they were packing down afterwards, under the noise of Sana, Krejjh, Jeeter, Campbell and Gregor eagerly discussing where they could go out for drinks to celebrate, Violet said to Arkady,

“I forgot to tell you earlier, but I heard back from the journalist. Emily Craddock.”

Arkady fumbled the wire that she was looping around itself. “Yeah? What did she say?”

“She said that she thinks we have enough for a story. Even with the missing data,” Violet said.

She looked happy, but something in Arkady’s chest still clenched. It had been nearly four weeks since the fateful gig at IGR Corp, and so far, everything had been quiet. The band had been on high alert at all of their performances at first, not spending any more time than was necessary setting up or lingering on the stage, but there’d been no attempts at sabotage, no suspicious ‘fans’ trying to approach them after a set. (There had been a few real fans whom Arkady had cross-examined a bit too aggressively when they tried to get close to the band, but people seemed to actually find it funny and no-one got offended).

They figured that IGR Corp must not know about the files that Violet had managed to copy across; Seiders had been unconscious, after all, and it was possible that they hadn’t realised that Violet had made off with anything, or had downplayed the severity of the incident to the higher-ups. Arkady had, in spite of her misgivings, broken the encryption on the files for Violet, but she’d been secretly hoping that the data wouldn’t turn out to be useful, or that there wouldn’t be enough of it to do anything with.

She’d hoped that even after Violet told her that she’d found a tech journalist who was interested in taking a look at the files and potentially investigate the story. Of course Arkady was a fan of doing whatever they could to stick it to the corporates; she just wished there was a way to do it that wouldn’t involve Violet painting a huge target on her back.

“That’s… good,” Arkady managed, and even she could hear how unconvincing it sounded. Violet looked at her questioningly. “It’s just…” She tried to find a way to word things that wasn’t, ‘I’m afraid that you won’t be safe’. “Once the information is out there, IGR Corp is going to know who leaked it. What happens if they come after you?”

“By that point, they should have bigger things to worry about, if the evidence that Emily Craddock has found is as damning as she says it is,” Violet pointed out. “She’s been looking into that engineer that Seiders mentioned, Alvy Connors. It’s not really clear whether something… happened to him, or whether he just made a run for it, but he definitely disappeared. And it wasn’t that long after he started work on Project ADVANCE.”

As they talked, the other band members had been clearing equipment away and loading it into the van, until Violet and Arkady were the only ones left in the warehouse.

“I know there’s risk involved,” Violet said. “But I can’t just forget everything I’ve learned. And this is bigger than me – I have to do it for Alvy, too, and his family and friends, and everyone else who could be affected by Project ADVANCE. What IGR Corp is doing-”

“I know, I know,” Arkady said. “Don’t get me wrong, I think they deserve to have the cover blown right off their shitty, awful surveillance plan.”

“I’m going to talk to the Captain before I do anything,” Violet assured her. “I know this could affect the band, too. I just wanted to tell you first.”

Why? Arkady wanted to ask, but that would have taken the conversation down a road that Arkady was not prepared to go down. Either Violet would say something like, ‘Because we’re friends’, or ‘Because you’re my bandmate’, and Arkady would feel like a moron for having hoped for anything different. Or she wouldn’t, and that would be worse, because Arkady had no idea how to respond to Violet saying… Well, it didn’t matter, because it would never happen, anyway.

“Sana will tell you to go for it,” she said. “If it’s what you think is right, she’ll be behind you all the way.”

“And… you?” Violet asked quietly.

“I…”

Why was it so hard for Arkady to just say that she approved? Violet was a grown woman who could make her own decisions; she didn’t need Arkady second-guessing her. Violet didn’t even need Arkady to agree with what she was doing – she could just go and do it anyway. But the fact that she’d asked Arkady meant that she cared what Arkady thought… and that made Arkady want to be honest with her.

And honesty was terrifying.

The moment stretched out; Arkady composed and drafted half a dozen different versions of what she wanted to say in her head. ‘I just need you to be careful’ – ugh, that sounded like something Sana would say. Also, of course Violet was going to be careful; that didn’t mean there was no risk involved. ‘I trust you to make the right choice’ – vague, and it also made Arkady feel weird. ‘If they hurt you, they’ll wish they’d never been born’ – alarming, and probably too honest.

Arkady took a breath in, gathering her nerve – and then both of them jumped as the van horn beeped loudly from outside.

“Paging bandmates Liu and Patel!” Krejjh shouted. “Bandmates Liu and Patel to the Rumormobile, please!”

Violet laughed a little, as Arkady huffed, inwardly cursing her own goddamn indecision. She’d spent so long trying to figure out what to say that she’d lost the chance to say anything.

“I guess we shouldn’t keep them waiting,” Violet said, slanting a small smile in Arkady’s direction.

“I trust you,” Arkady found herself saying, almost without meaning to. Violet looked puzzled, and Arkady scrambled to clarify. “Uh, that is – if you think this is the right thing to do. Then, you should… do it. Just…”

She still couldn’t say it, but Violet’s smile widened, her eyes softening like she knew what Arkady was trying (and failing) to tell her. “I’ll be careful,” she promised.

[milfspiggy]

Let’s Rank Snifits!

Hello! Snifits are my favorite Mario enemy! To share my love for them, I’m going to go through the entire extended Snifit family, and score them all on a scale from 1 - 10 for your reading pleasure!!

The OG Snifit

Perfect! 10/10!! How could you improve upon such a great design?? Well, you’ll see soon enough, but Snifits are the ultimate being in any form. They’re like Shy Guys, which are already great and wonderful - but Snifit benefits from the addition of a little snoot!!! All creatures could be improved with a snoot, I think. Snifit’s snoot especially looks both boopable and smoochable. I wish I had a Snifit plush. Anyway, let’s move on to some of their friends and get started under the cut!

Spookum

So, weirdly, to start things off, Snifits aren’t called Snifits in Super Mario RPG!! They’re called Spookums! I’m not sure why, but it’s kind of cute, I guess?? This is still pretty much just a Snifit, just with a less cute and evocative name. 9/10.

Snifit, Again

So, I lied!! Sorry!! There actually are enemies called “Snifit” in Super Mario RPG, but they aren’t your standard rank and file Snifits in this game! There are only eight of them, and they’re minibosses!! At least, that’s my understanding from the mario wiki. I haven’t actually gotten that far in Mario RPG yet! I’m bad at video games. Snifits four through seven are actually promoted in-game from Spookums to Snifits if you lose to them in battle, though! That’s a really cool mechanic, and I’d love to see things like that more often in video games. I also like the idea that the colour of the Snifit denotes rank, with black being the strongest. Overall, despite just being a black variant of a normal Snifit, I like these ones just a little bit more than your average Snifit! I just think they’re neat! 10.5/10!!!

Whistle Snifit, Slurp Snifit, and Spike Snifit

Sorry, I lumped these guys all together because they’re kind of just normal Snifits wearing accessories!! They’re all from Paper Mario: Colour Splash. 6/10 for the whole set. I love them all very much but they could stand to be a bit more adventurous!! I like the Spike Snifit the most because they’re wearing a cute little hat and also don’t have something stuffed into their snoot. Why would you put something into an already perfect snoot?? It looks uncomfortable. I like that the one with the straw is called a Slurp Snifit, though!! Slurp is a fun word. Also, these guys all come in red, blue, green, yellow, and pink! Yellow and pink are my favorite colours though, so I used those ones to make up for them being kind of boring :3

Chariot Snifit

Hey, this one is just in a car!! That’s somehow both worse and better than the last few from Colour Splash. It gets half a point though for teaming up with a Chain Chomp, which is another favorite of mine. 8.5/10!!!

Snifaro

Aaaaaaaa!!!!!! Look at these two pals!!! I love them!! The Snifaro is actually just a regular sized Snifit with a cool pharaoh mask standing on top of a regular Snifit inside of a sarcophagus!! The Super Mario Wiki says that one of their attacks features Snifit hopping on top of Snifaro’s sarcophagus and riding it like a surfboard. That’s wonderful and perfect! Take notes, Colour Splash Snifits!! This is how you accessorize!!! 10/10!!

Ice Snifit

Take a look at these two!! They are so adorable and look so warm in their little winter coats!!!! I like the walking head version used in the original Mario+Luigi Superstar Saga a lot, but the more standard looking version in the remakes are impossibly adorable. I would give the original Ice Snifit a 10/10, and the revamped one a 11/10!!! It’s quite possibly my favorite Snifit design.

Ice Snifit, Again

For some reason, this is the only image of these guys on the Mario Wiki, but they’re just as adorable as the previous Ice Snifits!!! Yoshi’s Wooly World is, aesthetically speaking, one of the best Mario games of all time. Possibly the best game ever? It’s too bad that it’s such an easy game. Regardless, this Snifit is on par with the last Ice Snifits, but for whatever reason I like the redesign in Superstar just a liiiiitle bit more. 10.5/10!

Toy Snifit

Absolutely lovely!! I’m not sure if these pals come in different colours, and I’ve never played the Mario vs. Donkey Kong series, but this Snifit makes me want to check them out!!! I’d like a real life wind-up toy of this Snifit. Let’s make it happen, Nintendo!! 9/10!!

Scorchit

Very cute! Kind of plain though. Sorry, Scorchit, but simply spitting out fire won’t put you on the same level as Ice Snifit!! It’s also apparently called “Zeus Guy” in the manual for Yoshi’s Island DS? That’s a cute name! I feel like it would fit better if this Snifit spat out lightning bolts instead of fire, though! I like that it’s pink. 7/10

Laser Snifit and Gunner Guy

Ohhhhhohohohohoho!!!!! Ohohoho!!!! This is where the real fun begins!!! Look at these friends!!!! I love them!!!! This is what Slurp Snifit up there should have been!! The snout is the defining trait of Snifits, and these two have bumped it up to eleven!!! Apparently Gunner Guy can’t move on his own, though, which is heartbreaking. Also, he might not actually be a Snifit??? He might be a Shy Guy with a gun on his face! Is that what all Snifits are? Are they the same thing? I choose to believe they aren’t, and the snout is somehow biologically part of their face along with the rest of the mask. I’m rambling, though. Laser Snifit earns an 11/10 from me, while Gunner Guy gets an 8/10 for making me feel sad while still somehow being delightful.

Propeller Mucho

What the heck?!  What a whimsical name!! Unfortunately, this is the only image of them on the Mario Wiki, but they still look pretty cute to me! I imagine they’re the same as Fly Guys, but like. Snifits. I love the idea that Shy Guys and Snifits are kind of mechanical or toy-like in nature. Maybe that’s why they live in the toy box in Paper Mario??? Anyways, 6/10. I wish I could see them better! They would have scored higher, but they’re outdone by.......

Flying Snifit

A friend with a way less whimsical name,  but a way more whimsical appearance!! Look at those wings!!!! Most Mario enemies, when given the gift of flight, have cute little angel wings slapped onto them - but not Flying Snifit!! No, instead, this little garden buddy sprouts a pair of adorable cartoon butterfly wings!!  I adore this Snifit!! They’re going to get a whopping 11/10 from me! We aren’t done with Flying Snifit just yet, however, because they also show up with a couple of friends!!

Flifit and Sneed

I told you our garden party wasn’t over yet!! These are also easily some of the most inventive varieties of Snifit!! There are only a couple of others that stray from the general Snifit body plan, and these two are both some of the weirdest and cutest!! God, I love them. Flifit spits out Sneed, which in turn spits out (presumably inanimate) seeds! I love whatever the heck Sneed is doing in that animation. I choose to interpret it as a little butt waggle. Shake it, Sneed!! For both of these friends, I’m handing out a solid 10/10!!!

Snufit

So, like I said before, there are only a couple of Snifit-adjacent friends that change up the general body plan that is Snifit! Snufits are ghost Snifits that live in Hazy Maze Cave in Super Mario 64!! They’re very cute, but when I was little I was actually kind of afraid of them? I’m not sure why! In the original game on the Nintendo 64, Snufit was round and shaped like a Boo, which is pretty cute! I love the idea that all ghosts in the Mario universe are just big round balls of ghostliness. This version of Snufit gets an 8/10! It’s pretty cute, but the redesign of Snufit in the DS version is so much more appealing to me, for some reason! I think it’s the floppy little sleeves. As someone who always wore sweaters that were much too big for me and always seemed to have “puppy paws” as my mom would call them, this new Snufit just calls to me. Also, shouldn’t these guys have been called Spookums?? I guess Mario RPG did come out before Mario 64, but it wouldn’t be the first time some weird name shenanigans had gone down in the Mario universe. Anyways, the redesign of Snufit gets an 11/10 from me!! It’s up there with Ice Snifit and Flying Snifit as one of my favorites!!

Spider

Hey, these guys aren’t even in any of the games!! I think that should change though. I like them a lot!! Pretty creepy, and bizarre, though! I used to watch The Super Mario Bros. Super Show! a fair amount when i was little, but I must have missed whichever episode these guys appeared in. I think I would have remembered them for the rest of my life if I had!! I used to be really afraid of spiders when I was little. I think they’re really neat now though!! Still, I’m only going to give these guys an 8/10 for virtue of never being used in a game, and also for being kind of creepy and also for not having eight legs. I know that stuff isn’t their fault! It’s just the way things are sometimes. Life is cruel, especially to spiders.

Spiky Snifit

Okay, these guys are the last of the official Snifit friends! I probably should have put them up with Flifit, but I wanted them to stand on their own. I love cacti a lot, being from a desert, and saguaro cacti are just the best!! I also love how Flifit seems to have their mask organically growing from their stem, but Spiky here could easily just be a normal cactus with a Snifit mask slapped onto it!! Does it have a face underneath?? Is it literally just a cactus??? Could you make anything into a Snifit by putting a mask onto it??? Spiky Snifit here raises a lot of questions, and answers literally none of them, and for that I love them. 9.5/10!! 

Finally, I would like to give an honorable mention to one other Mario enemy that I think has been unfairly left behind and forgotten. Let’s take a moment to remember a dear friend....

Tweeter

Tweeter is an enemy that debuted in Doki Doki Panic/ Super Mario Bros 2 alongside Shy Guy, Snifit, Bob-omb, Birdo, and many other friends that we all know, love, and continually see in Mario games even today!! Unfortunately, unlike many of the other enemies from Mario 2, Tweeter hasn’t really ever shown up again! They make the occasional cameo here and there, but even those are few and far between!! Why haven’t Tweeters ever shown up again?? It’s unclear, but they’re also pretty high up on my list of favorite mario enemies! It turns out I just love masks and snoots, especially if that snoot is also a beak. If I were to give these guys a score, and I will, I would give them a 100/100!! Gone, but never forgotten (by me).

If you read all of this, thank you for your time!! I love you, and so does Snifit and all their many friends!! Feel free to shoot me a message telling me your favorite Mario enemy, and check out the blog @weirdmarioenemies​​ !! I’ve been binge reading their entire archive, and as you could probably guess, it heavily inspired me to make this post! I just love Snifit so much, and wanted to spread the love!! I hope you all come to love them as much as I do. Also, @nintendo​, please bring back Tweeter and also make Snifit a playable character in Mario Kart, Mario Party, Mario Tennis, your next main Mario platformer, et cetera, et cetera... In fact, let’s ditch Mario and make the games all about Snifit!!!

New Super Snifit Bros!! Coming soon to a store near you!!

[inventors-fair]

Two-Faced Commentary

People went really big this week! There were a lot of cool tropes, novel mechanics, and a surprising number of white cards with hexproof.

@alextfish​ - Manifold Core

The front side of this card is a very powerful cost reduction effect, especially given that it applies to a set of cards that often don’t have any colored mana in their costs. I suspect that would often function as a combo piece in decks that don’t intend to transform it, to a degree that it overshadows the rest of the card a bit, but the overall flavor is good. The card is also very aggressive when transformed on turn 4, although that you need to four-for-one yourself to get the creature serves as a powerful check. 

@bread-into-toast​ - Guilt-Wracked Artist

A genuinely horrifying card concept. I’m not 100% sure that I follow what the treasure represents in the story (the key?), but it’s still very unnerving.

Mechanically, the card holds together reasonably well, in that if you get the card in the graveyard the “right” way, then it’s easier to pay the disturb cost, and the mutual discard plays reasonably with a graveyard-focused strategy.

@decayingbooks​ - Graceful Swan

This is a great transformation trope, and a very strategy-heavy flip card. Flip cards that gain value by flipping back and forth are established design space, with Huntmaster of the Fells being the most notable, but this card adds the additional wrinkle that, once you’ve accumulated enough bird tokens, you want it to be night on your own turn to take advantage of the ability to buff your tokens. (Although both activated abilities do have value on your opponent’s turn.) 

While it’s doing reasonable flavor work, the ability that makes your bird creature tokens humans may be overkill. There’s nothing wrong with trinket text, and in a set with human tribal elements it could be genuinely relevant, but the card is already fairly complicated.

@deg99 - Seraph of Salvation

The creature revealing its true demonic nature (or falling angel, but my understanding is that this is the former) trope is a good fit for a TDFC. There’s a ton packed into this card - the front side on its own is very flashy, and threatening an instant-speed Mythos of Snapdax once the card is on the field changes the way the game is played significantly. (Wrathing at instant speed is a big deal.) The mechanics of each side don’t feel all that strongly connected, but they make enough sense on their own. I like the aesthetic decision to leave the demon W/B rather than making it mono-black, as its effect is more strongly associated with white.

@dimestoretajic​ - Zosusk, Cruel Taskmaster

The front half of this card is extremely strong. Even at four mana, a super-Ashnod’s Altar that can go in the command zone is a scary proposition, especially given that it’s also difficult to remove and can cash itself out for a treasure if it would die. The indestructibility is arguably overkill, especially as the card can generate a lot of value even if it is removed right away.

Similarly, I’m not sure if the back half particularly needs hexproof; if you’ve got any kind of board, it generates a lot of value, and I think that on balance it’s better if that’s answerable.

The idea of a card that’s sort of a side-grade when transformed is interesting, as is the tension about whether or not to cash out your creatures if it’s going to transform, and I like that the tension is abated a bit by the fact that both halves make sense in the same deck, even though they operate differently.

@fractured-infinity​ - Velis, Distorted Reflection

This is a really clever twist on the Evil Twin design space. The back side is very powerful, but the effort required to get there is real and meaningful, and the front side is enough of a slightly bad deal on its own that the transformation ability isn’t just a freebie. Needing to specifically see a creature with the same name die is also fairly clever, as it means that Velis needs help to transform. (You can’t just crash Velis into whatever it’s copying.) The back side does have a pretty high level of inevitability; once you’re at six mana, you can effectively “steal” any creature your opponent plays before they can attack with it, and in Commander can be used to keep other commanders off of the field. This latter feature might make this card safer as a non-legendary creature.

@gollumni​ - Ral, Untapped Potential

The front half of this card makes a lot of sense as a Ral card. The sparking condition doesn’t tie directly into Ral’s own sparking story in any obvious way (he sparked when he discovered his partner was cheating on him), but it mechanically ties into what the character is about and strongly enables his fairly stiff sparking condition.

If I have a quibble with this card, it’s that you often won’t be able to productively make use of Ral the turn he flips. To do so, you’d need a fourth instant or sorcery that you can cast that turn, this time at full price, and if it’s a very cheap spell then the amount of value you’re getting is pretty modest.

@greensunzenith​ - Escape from the City

What I think really elevates this card above the basic idea of a Saga that transforms into a creature is that it does something with the lore counters after transforming. Unless I’m missing something, haste on Hazoret is mostly superfluous, as it will nearly always have been on the battlefield from the beginning of your turn when it transforms. (It could still matter if you double proliferate or if it changes controllers, I guess.)

@grornt​​ - Inconspicuous Youth

This card is another fantastic choice for a transformation trope. This one does a magical girl transformation in a non-obvious but flavorful way, where the character transforms specifically in response to a major threat, and then reverts when the threat is gone. That it transforms even when the major threat is your own card feels like an acceptable flavor bend for the sake of making the card playable, and that it reverts as soon as any major threat is gone is a reasonable choice for simplicity. (It could also check for 6 MV creatures at the end of the turn.) 

I went back and forth on whether I liked the back half having defender. On one hand, it allows the back half to be far bigger and scarier than if it didn’t have defender; without that, the transformed half needs to shrink or the card needs to cost more. It’s also fine flavor. On the other hand, it really gums up the board, as it’s very difficult to profitably attack into the card. Additionally, it kind of creates an “...oh” moment when reading the back.

Lastly, I think that a white creature just straight up having hexproof is a bit of a bend (although not one wholly without precedent.) The flavor helps justify it (and it’s definitely mechanically relevant), but flavor can justify a lot of things.

Despite these questions, I do really think the design is very clever, and it was one of my favorites from this week.

@helloijustreadyourpost​ - Marchesa, Tyrant Queen

The mirrored Abyss effects are clever together, and the flavor helps to sell the shift. The nontoken clause on the first side is doing several interesting things in terms of not only making the card a bit stronger as a control tool, but in helping enable the flip. Giving opponents a natural out on the back side helps check the overall power level of the card as well, and I think it’s a positive that any wrath is an answer for the back half in Commander. While the flavor makes sense and it certainly makes the card stronger, I could take or leave the second ability on the back.

@hiygamer​​ - Penultimate Form

I like that this card cleverly ties the “quest” condition to something that the reverse side of the card will naturally need. I also think that the triggered ability on the back is extremely clever, in that helps make the card less tricky. Without the triggered ability on the back, there’s a not-immediately-obvious interaction where casting instant spells in response to each other allows the creature to transform with five loyalty counters on it, which is a major advantage in that the card can use its -4 ability right away and survive. Stealing a creature is extremely powerful protection for a planeswalker and strong in general. However, because a similar ability is present on the back, players don’t need to recognize that stacking instants correctly allows the planeswalker side to start with five+ loyalty counters, as you can get the same effect by just casting them in sequence.

@hypexion​ - Sigarda, Fallen Grace

The transform condition on this card is quite difficult, even with the amount of Eldrazi token-making available and its ability to fuel itself, but the front half is plenty strong. Large, evasive, efficient hexproof creatures are something that I think they shy away from a bit now (and white rarely gets creatures that just have unconditional hexproof), although the throwbacks to Sigarda’s first card are clear. While the back half of the card is a meaningful upgrade, the front half is strong enough that it stands on its own - many decks may not worry about flipping the card at all.

@i-am-the-one-who-wololoes​ - Ormendhal Weakened

Ormendhal is a potent abyss effect, and having it wait until your upkeep to trigger for all players is a good safety choice - it gives your opponents a healthy window of time to respond to it. The backside is something of a consolation prize, as in many circumstances it will operate like a basic Plains, but the flavor is interesting. I don’t totally understand the decision to allow the land to tap for colorless instead of just white; outside of an environment where colorless mana costs exist, it won’t make much of a difference, and while there have been Eldrazi on Innistrad (and Ormendahl was affected by Emrakul), the connection seems a little loose to justify what’s otherwise an unusual line of rules text. 

@jsands84​ - Battered Lamp

This is a really fun design. That you need another creature to “rub” the lamp is a cute piece of text, and allows for other costs on the card to be pulled down to really attractive levels

The degree of inevitability on this card (5-power, evasive, bounces any blockers your opponent has, requires either artifact destruction or instant-speed creature destruction), along with its complexity, might push it to rare, although I like that the numbers work out such that this doesn’t win the game on its own.

I’m not sure whether this is intentional, but you can effectively get “infinite wishes” by having Zephyr Djinn bounce itself when you transform it for the last time. It’s enough of a tempo hit that I don’t think it’s a power level concern, and if you’ve already made (and probably attacked with) a 5-power evasive creature twice, then there’s a good chance that you’d rather attack with the Djinn the third time than to bounce it, but I felt that it was an interaction worth pointing out.

@kellylogs​ - Klara, Embereth Aspirant

This is a sufficiently clean, elegant transform condition that, even though this is not an existing planeswalker character, tells a clear story. I do feel like the backside of this card could be a bit stronger; if you’ve successfully attacked alone with Klara, blockers may not be something that’s causing you problems, and in an aggressive deck a 3/2 with Exalted may be at least as powerful planeswalker side in many scenarios. (Although being able to get a 2/2 Vigilance creature right away means that you don’t fall back much in terms of board presence.)

The -7 ability in particular could probably also use a bit more juice. While it’s technically a three-turn ult, its impact disappears if Klara does, and the +2 ability required to get to it is pretty weak (especially on the turn when Klara transforms, where it will generally do nothing.)

@misterstingyjack​ - King Pakesh II

The two sides of this card are loosely mechanically connected (they both like it if your opponents’ creatures die, although both halves can also be fueled in other ways), but the flavor helps tie them together. I think that limiting the front half to one treasure/turn is a good decision both in that it helps keep the cost of the card down and in that the card isn’t so good that you don’t care about the back half. Both halves have unique mechanics that still feel reasonably elegant and flavorful, and I like that the card doesn’t try to do too much. This is also a cool recontextualization of Disturb in general.

@morbidlyqueerious​ - Niko, Quizzical Javelineer

You mentioned that this card is revised from an earlier contest where the goal was to make a card that included every letter of the alphabet, and while that shows in the card’s name, the overall package isn’t stretching or squishing tooooo much to meet that criterion. Niko offers a larger amount of repeatable scry that exceeds what’s generally printed, although needing to connect with what’s otherwise a gray ogre to get it makes it such that it’s not likely to fire too many times in one game. The flip condition is challenging enough that I think the strongish +2 ability on the reverse side is justified, especially as it will often leave Niko vulnerable. If anything, I think the reverse side could perhaps be a smidge stronger.

I’m not sure whether this is intentional or not, but I do think that it’s interesting that it’s easier to meet the card threshold for the when you’re on the draw, but easier to meet the unblocked attack condition when you’re on the play.

@naban-dean-of-irritation​ - Will, Stoic Cryomancer

This is a pretty clever way of handling a flip walker that represents power sets found in two different colors, and the card does a solid job of feeling like a tag team. Another cool thing about this card is that it defies the legendary rule as long as you leave both copies on different sides.

If I have a critique of the card, it’s that I do think it’s a bit difficult to reach Will’s ult, however. If you play the card on curve (turn 3), you generally can’t flip it until turn 4. From there, you need to use the +2 three times to get to 10 loyalty, which is only possible if your opponent consistently has at least two creatures. That takes you to turn 7, which means that you can use the Ult on turn 8, making it a five-turn ult (or four turns if you were able to flip Will on turn 1). The ult only does something, however, if you control another planeswalker. While the ult is not a big deal on a planeswalker that’s this flexible, I think it could be a smidge cheaper. (-9 would save you no turns on building to it, but means that you don’t need to have another walker in play to use it.)

I’m also not sure if overtly making typeless permanents is something that’s worth putting on a card, given the potential confusion. The rules can handle it, and there are ways of making it happen in-game already, but similar gameplay can be achieved in more conventional ways.

@nicolbolas96​ - Ugin, Last Among Elders

This is another card where the front half is almost worth it on its own, so the relatively steep flip requirement is fine, as it serves as more of a bonus. Life gain and card draw aren’t the things I most strongly associate with Ugin, but the card draw works as a mirror of Nicol Bolas, the Ravager, and the package is sort of like a miniature version of Ugin’s ult.

This is a small thing, but I wish Ugin was a bit bigger than 3/3. I realize that the similar Nicol Bolas, the Ravager, is only a 4/4, but 3/3 feels a bit small for an Elder Dragon.

The planeswalker side is recognizably Ugin, serving as a sort of greatest-hits of his associated cards. The novel ultimate will win the game on the spot in any deck built around it, but as you spent 5+8 mana on Ugin already and upticked it three times, that’s totally fine.

@nine-effing-hells​ - Mysterious Ruins

It’s not totally obvious which part of the ability the Revelation ability word refers to, but overall the card tells a clear story. A land that transitions into cardflow in the late midgame and a (kinda) finisher in the late game makes a lot of sense, although opponents that are too worried about the reverse side can save a kill spell for it. A land that enters the battlefield untapped doesn’t need to do much else to be good, so the high overall investment required to flip it is a good decision. Decks that want this sort of effect will tend to be controlling decks that can make better use of the mutual draw as well.

@partlycloudy-partlyfuckoff - Tender of the Wilds

The names on this card are clever, and help tell a different story than the superficially similar Mayor of Avabruck.

This is a very strong effect; the back side in particular is both large for a 2-mana werewolf and has a very strong anthem effect. While a good fit for a werewolf deck, this card is strong enough to go almost anywhere (and the front half is slightly better in a non-werewolf deck.)

This is a minor thing, but the more common templating for abilities like the backside has is to roll the stats it provides into the creature itself (printing it as a 4/3) and then to print the ability as “Other non-human creatures you control...” However, I think the templating you’ve chosen is potentially reasonable on this card for the sake of mirroring the front half.

@piccadilly-blue​ - Gavony Town Hall

This is a very difficult card to evaluate, because its impact on the game can vary a ton depending on how things are ordered.

This needs to go in a token deck to do anything at all, but the day-side drawback of turning off all of your creatures is harsher than the anthem on the back is beneficial, if you’re trying for an aggro strategy. On the flip side, there’s a lot of potential to gum up the board quite a bit with indestructible hexproof tokens if you play the card after your token producers. Token strategies already sometimes gum up the board, and this creates the potential for game stalls. Your opponent can get around this by passing their turn to shift to night, but that’s a fairly major tempo loss, and it sets you up well for the crack back.

I do like that there’s some interesting things that can be done with wraths and with creating token copies of cards with powerful static effects while on the day side. 

@pocketvikings​ - Covetous Vizier

One of two “genie of the lamp” cards this week, I believe that this card is specifically a reference to the Disney movie Aladdin. (I could be wrong about that - I’m not super familiar with genies.) This card is basically Phylactery Lich on an installment plan, although you spend more total mana and some life. Additionally, your opponent has a window of time to respond with creature removal, which is not the case for the Lich. In compensation, the front half of the card can be played profitably even if you control no artifacts. Black does, as of Midnight Hunt, apparently get 2/3 creatures with upside for 1B at higher rarities, but a 2/3 for 1B with a useful effect is already, on its own, a satisfactory creature. The first question I had with this card is why it wasn’t just a lich, but not every card needs to use the most obvious or most-established flavor for an effect - and it’s more memorable that it doesn’t.

@quillpaw​ - Shellcrown Phoenix

A few different phoenix cards - Everquill Phoenix and Rekindling Phoenix - have used complicated tokens to try to mimic this effect, and a few DFC cards represent hatching eggs, but this card is novel in combining them, and I think it works really well. 

The one slight oddness with this card is that it’s possible to miss your chance to transform it back, if you don’t have the mana (or don’t wish to spend the mana) to flip it at the time that the last counter is removed. It’s possible to play around this by attacking with fewer creatures, but I don’t think that the card as a whole is so strong that this limitation is necessary. Additionally, due to the cost of the card and the flip condition, I feel like the game will often be over before the card can flip back, but it still has utility in getting the last bit of damage in in a gummed up board state.

@real-aspen-hours​ - Gathering Storm

The front half of this card is very strong, offering heavy levels of card selection at a reasonable price on a card type that’s relatively difficult to interact with. I don’t know that it’s over the top (three mana is a lot for just selection), but the card doesn’t hinge completely on 

I respect the decision to use a simple transform condition. I feel like the “obvious” angle is to condition it on having a certain number of cards in your graveyard, and that’s potentially safer (the current version will, I think, sometimes be flipped with just one very strong card in your graveyard), but even that requires some building around, so it’s probably not that big of a deal. I do like giving players a decision 

@reaperfromtheabyss​ - Wavewhisper Egret

This is a lot of card for a two-mana uncommon. The front half would be an attractive card even without the ability to transform, and the transform effect will generally scry at least 4. Blue can get 2-power fliers with upside at higher rarities on occasion, but this is certainly a very aggressively-costed version of this creature profile.

I also think the decision to flavor this as a card from Kaladesh, rather than from New Phyrexia or Alara, was an interesting one. It injects a bit of light horror into a setting that doesn’t have much of that.

@shakeszx - A Tempest Foretold

Having the saga exile itself and return transformed is an elegant way to kill two birds with one stone, dealing both with the sacrifice clause on the card and helpfully disposing of the now-irrelevant lore counters.

I’m not 100% sure how to parse the first ability on this card - I’m assuming that it’s meant to pull from your graveyard or cards you own in exile (and maybe the stack), since those are under most circumstances the only zones that will have instant and sorcery cards in them when the ability resolves that aren’t your hand, but as written it sort of reads as though you can grab cards from places like your opponent’s graveyard. The rules do intervene to stop you from putting other players’ cards into your hand, but I feel that the wording on this could be clearer.

I’m also not sure that the back side works the way we want it to. In cases of cards that exile themselves on resolution, I’m not sure that Izzuke will recognize that it’s the same card, and any other card will go to the graveyard upon resolution, where it won’t be recognized as the same card if it’s then exiled again. (The rules could maybe be altered to support this, but it’d create additional complications.) Additionally, I’m not sure that exiling your hand in order to slowly potentially get the instants and sorceries back one at a time really feels worth it; Izzuke is a good deal for four mana, but even with Ward 4, the blowout potential is pretty huge. If your opponent saves any removal for it, you’re very likely to lose.

All that said, the general concept of a saga that builds up a resource that the creature it flips into can expend is a strong one.

@snugz​ - Queen Bee

Assuming that you hit your land drops and that nothing happens to your drones, this card will flip after two land drops, having created seven 1/1 fliers. The reverse side will then make these fliers 2/2’s, three of which can attack right away (assuming this occurred over two turns). In most formats, this means that your opponent is going to be dead before the long-term value aspects of the card come into play. They are still relevant in Commander and as a rebuilding option if your drone army gets wrathed, and the flavor is good, however.

On the whole, the card may be a little too efficient at building a game-winning board, especially as it is hard to remove if not removed immediately. I think the card could do fewer things and still work as a card, even though all of the individual components make flavor sense.

@starch255​ - Cursed Knight

There’s a lot of things I really like about this card. I like that its toughness is low compared to its power, so it will usually either kill something or die in any combat with another creature. I like that the Frog side is still a knight. This feels like a reasonably in-pie way to give white a well-above-the-curve creature, and if your opponent doesn’t have an answer or a body to throw in front of it, this puts out much larger life swings than two-mana uncommons normally ever do. Even if your opponent tosses a 1/1 in front of this, you’re still up a bit.

@whuh-oh​ - Masked Debutante

This card has a lot of moving pieces, but the overall package makes sense. The actual power level of the card hinges a lot on your opponent having at least three creatures already in play, but there are enough outs to it that it doesn’t feel hopeless in any case.  I also like that the creatures have to actually hit you to get the counters, limiting the total amount of value you can steal. I also like that the card doesn’t have any sort of anti-sacrifice mechanism built in; it’s game-winning enough of the time as it is, and doesn’t need to have what answers do exist for it to be shut off.

I’m not 100% sure that the creature-stealing is really a red thing, but tying it to the survival of the creature helps, and in general makes the card much more fair.

@wilsonosgoodmcman​ - Venser, Close to Death

In inventing a new card subtype, this is the most ambitious card for this week. I also like the flavor of a doomed planeswalker having only minus abilities, and lining up the planeswalker so that it needs to die to using one of its abilities (or take damage on your turn, I guess) is a nice little minigame that isn’t trivial, but also is easy enough that you can usually expect to flip Venser if your opponent doesn’t have a substantially greater board presence than you.

The third ability on Venser should probably target only other permanents, to avoid confusion about what happens if it targets Venser, but that’s pretty minor. (I’m assuming that the intent is that it doesn’t flicker Venser.)

Even though it costs you (usually) a creature and the effort of flipping Venser, I think that the +1 on the reverse side might be a bit much. While all of the abilities are powerful, that one stands out as especially tough to beat.

@wolkemesser​ - Keepsafe Bear

This card tells a cool story, and I appreciate the work you did in balancing the difficulty to flip the card. At first, I sort of felt like it went a little overboard in terms of preventing you from flipping it (you basically need a wrath or for your opponent to block it or attack into it with a much larger creature), but the front half and back half are both strong enough that I think it’s okay for there to be some fairly specific hoops. 

The back half does just enough, I think. There’s an alternate design for this card where the back half loses indestructible and the front half is harder to flip, and that version is probably a bit easier to print, but I think there’s a place for the higher-challenge version presented here as well.