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creatur3creati0ns · 1 year

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My History with Self Harm and Self Tattooing

I think it goes without saying that this will be discussing both tattooing and self harm, so if that’s something you don’t want to read about, here’s your trigger warning. I won’t be getting into explicit descriptions about self harm but for the sake of the story I will be mentioning the main form of self harm I used to engage in, which is cutting. I myself can not read, hear, or watch any media that shows or describes cutting, and even writing or saying the world evokes a very bad physical reaction in me so trust me when I say I will try to tell this as best I can while attempting not to trigger anyone, especially myself. But I will be talking about it, maybe more than you’re comfortable with, so do be careful if needed. There will also be mentions of suicidal ideation, mental illness, and the struggles that come along with those, as well as brief mentions of childhood abuse and trauma. No specifics, but the acknowledgment of them. I also show a picture where I have mild hives on my skin, in the “My History with Tattooing” section, and I do warn before I show you. I briefly mention sexual themes, as well as BDSM.

My History with Self Harm

I started self harming around 13 years old, after I was in a car accident that gave me a traumatic brain injury and triggered a myriad of mental illnesses including social anxiety, major depressive disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, and depersonalization/derealization. Along with this I was dealing with abuse from my parents and pressures around school. Everything accumulated in panic attacks and general feelings of hopelessness and helplessness. That brought on heavy thoughts of suicidal ideation. I did not have any control in my life, especially over what happened to my own body. The way that I regained a bit of control was by self harming. My usual go-to was cutting. This also helped with my dissociation disorder, because it was a very grounding experience that brought me back into reality and my body. I had a whole ritual surrounding it, and it was something that I did very often and was the main coping mechanism I used at the first sign of trouble. It got to the point where I would even do it at school, under my desk or hidden in the office.

When I started getting help for my struggles, one suggestion I found online to help with self harm urges was to draw on myself. This was something that I connected with instantly. Very quickly I found myself spending at least an hour each night drawing on the places I wanted to self harm. I would spend time each morning refreshing the drawings that might have smudged at night, and redrawing them after a shower. My marker of choice was any Sharpie, and I still have a very large collection of them. Black was my usual go to, and I had a black Sharpie on me at all times. Usually two, one with a pointed tip for details and one with a rounded tip for thicker lines or coloring things in. I tried different brands of skin safe markers and I did like them, but they didn’t last as long and they were expensive. At some point I was obsessed with “Mr. Sketch Scented Markers” and I still have two packages of those. I loved experimenting with different markers and I still do, but now it’s mainly for drawing or coloring on paper. I also experimented with different ways to make the drawings last longer, like covering them with baby powder and hairspray. I would draw on myself any chance I would get, and would always spend the car ride to school doing it.

Pictured above was the first photo I have of a drawing I did on myself. I’m using Snapchat screenshot for most of the pictures in this post because it has the date there. These were done with the good ol’ Mr. Sketch, and I specifically remember I would only listen to Emma Chamberlain’s “spring 2018” playlist while doing this in my mother’s bedroom. She has since changed the playlist name and added songs I never listened to, but the first 16 or so songs were the ones I would listen to every night for a few weeks. Why I was in my mother’s bedroom is also a long story, but when I was dealing with my suicidal ideation I was not allowed to sleep in a room by myself for around two years. During this time I had to sleep in her room, in her bed. About an hour before bed I would be able to have the room to myself to draw.

I was never much of an artist before I started doing this, so most of the things I did at the beginning of my skin drawing journey were doodles I thought of or simple designs I saw on Pinterest.

At some point I graduated from drawing only on my inner forearms and outer thighs to my hands and fingers and all over my legs and pretty much anywhere I could reach. I got pretty good at drawing with my non-dominant hand so that my right hand and arm was covered in marker as well. Here I was still doing some Pinterest drawings.

Those triangles on my left knee in the picture above was something I would do a lot. It was the first “design” I ever created myself, and was definitely the easiest to do. You can see X’s on my hand here, which is something I started to do a bit before this picture, like this. Easier to do with my non-dominant hand.

One of my favorite things to doodle were triangles, like the ones seen here.

I started getting a little funky with my triangles.

One of my favorite things to do after a few years was to black out my knuckles with boxes.

In my spare time I would look at other people’s tattoos online and try to imitate them on my own skin.

I started to like blacked out shapes. Try to get as much color on my body as possible.

That turned into blacking out a portion of my arm.

Or even blacking out my whole arm.

I even drew on my neck and face.

Funnily enough, I ended up getting my first piercing there, an eyebrow piercing.

Some extras I like:

Little hint of a blacked out arm there.

My mother wasn’t a fan of any of this at first until I told her it helped with my self harm urges. Of course it didn’t completely stop my self harming, but it definitely lessened how much I did it. She would often gift me markers for holidays, or even just on random days when she was at the store and found something that I might like. That’s what happened with the “Mr. Sketch Scented Markers.” If you read my “The First 20 Years” post, you know I have a lot of complicated feelings about my mother. She was heavily abusive and our relationship suffered because of it . But as every other human being on the planet, she had her good moments and there were things she was good at as a parent. She would stand up for me when others made negative comments about my drawings. My grandmother didn’t like the fact that I had Sharpie all over my hands, but the only time I heard her bring it up to my mother, my mother said that it really helped me and that it was important. The next day my grandmother complimented some of my drawings, and a few months later when a friend of hers was visiting, she pointed it out to her friend and mentioned that she thought I was getting good at it. My grandmother was also very abusive and a decently bad person, but again. People are not only one thing blah blah.

Once I was at a doctor’s appointment and had heavy black drawings all over my hands and a nurse asked if they were tattoos. I was maybe 16 at the time, and I told her no, it was just marker. She went on to say that that was good, because tattoos are bad and unprofessional and will kill your chance at being successful and I should especially not have them so young. I nodded along silently and then left to have a panic attack in the bathroom, and texted my mother telling her what happened because I didn’t know what else to do. It might seem like an extreme reaction, but in general I hated confrontation and any time any adult showed even an ounce of disappointment or anger over something I did or even just who I was, it destroyed me. My mother ended up calling the office to explain the importance of my drawings (this office already knew in depth about my self harm and mental health issues, as it was a small medical practice and my mother loved to talk) and say that what the nurse said was upsetting and inappropriate. A few minutes later the nurse came back into the exam room to apologize very sincerely and give me a hug, which was appreciated but also very awkward considering I thought it looked like I called my mommy to complain about the mean nurse to get her in trouble.

In October of 2020 I started taking drawing a little more seriously, and finally found my style. I was always doodling, literally any chance I could get. Every page in my school notebooks were filled with triangles and lines and dots. There was a drawing on some part of my body at all times. I found this artist, ihategreeneggs on Instagram and wanted to try my own version of something he did. This was his drawing that inspired me.

And this is what I ended up doing. My very first drawings of what would eventually become my style.

Here I drew my mushroom guy (who is my favorite, now) on my arm. A little hard to see but you get the picture. I plan on getting him tattooed on me for real. Probably by someone else, just so it’s as good as it can be.

I realized after a few years that I enjoy having marks on my skin. Whether it was self harm, Sharpies, scars, random scratches, or even hickeys and impact play marks later on in my life, any time I could see something on my skin out of the corner of my eye or in the mirror it would make me happy and present in myself. I’m still not totally sure why, but I think it has something to do with “my skin has changed or looks different than when I was born and that is proof that I am real.” This is still something I feel now, but I have developed healthier ways of getting those marks on my skin.

My History with Tattoos

I was around tattoos at a very young age. My dad has several pretty old tattoos, and two of them were decent sized pieces on both forearms. I can’t remember exactly what they were, but I’m near positive that one was a traditional full body tiger, and the other was a traditional scorpion. He had some other ones on his shoulder and his chest. He has my mother’s name in a red heart. My mother’s only tattoo is a giant rose on her ass that spells my father’s name in the leaves. Yes, they are divorced.

My mother said early on in my life that she did not want me or my sister to get any tattoos or facial piercings. If we did get tattoos, they needed to be very easily hidden. When I was younger, I didn’t really have a desire for tattoos or piercings. I thought they were cool, but not for me. I did want to dye my hair, though, and my mother refused to let us do that either. As I entered middle school, I was exposed to emo culture, as are most young queer kids, and then I did want tattoos and piercings. I knew that as soon as I turned 18, I was gonna spend that day getting piercings and tattoos and dyeing my hair. That’s not what I did during my birthday, but a couple months after turning 18 I got my first facial piercing, and a couple months after that I ordered my first hand poke kit. At least I dyed my hair immediately.

If you’re familiar with tattoos, you know that hand poked tattoos are usually called stick and pokes. I personally say hand poke because of the stigma around “stick n pokes” and the fact that I did mine with an actual tattoo needle and tattoo ink, as opposed to the sewing needle and pen ink that most people think of when you say stick and poke. Nothing wrong with that, I personally am of the opinion that you can do whatever the hell you want with your body as long as you’re still advocating for others to do it as safely as they can. A lot of the tattoo artists I was learning from called it hand poked, or even hand pushed, and it stuck for me. I don’t care what others call it, but I think hand poked sounds cute and is more fitting for my personal process.

I had been learning about the tattooing process for years, but in the months following my 18th birthday I started learning more about the hand poke process as opposed to machine done tattoos. I saw hand poke as more approachable and accessible. I had known for years that some day I wanted to be a tattoo artist. After drawing on myself for years, developing my style, and drawing on anyone who would let me, I wanted to be able to do it permanently. I love the idea of providing people with little friends on their body that go with them everywhere. That’s exactly what I want in life! And I like creating, it’s the best thing for me to do.

I really wanted tattoos and the easiest way was for me to do it myself. I was a few hours away from my parents, in my own room I was paying rent for, with my partner and close friend in the rooms across the hall. I finally felt safe and grounded. I had my own space and I had the freedom to do what I wanted. Now was as good a time as any to try hand poke out.

I had decided that I wanted my first tattoo to be meaningful to me, and I didn’t care if the rest I got were. “Firsts” have always been important for me in my life. In September of 2021, I decided to tattoo “LET GO” on the top right of my right thigh, the words facing me. This, of course, has absolutely no meaning to me now, but at the time I thought this was a good reminder. I think it came out pretty damn good considering it was my first ever tattoo on skin.

My second tattoo was a creature I drew a long while ago, and I did it on the top right of my left shin, right below the knee. This was a horrible and painful decision, especially for my second tattoo ever. I did this tattoo the same day I did my first one, because the first one was so quick to do.

A little over a week later, I did my next tattoos. My third and fourth tattoos were also done the same day. An “X” on my left middle finger knuckle, something I’ve wanted for a while, and a little smiley face on the second knuckle of my left pointer finger.

I don’t know for sure why I did that fourth one, as I was never a huge fan of smiley faces. I just think I wanted another finger tattoo while I had the supplies out. I regretted it pretty quickly, but the very next day my sister came to visit me in the new city I moved to and she was wearing a smiley face ring on the same finger I had my tattoo on. So it was very much worth it for the sweet memory.

A little less than a week after those, I did a pretty ambitious tattoo, my fifth. About a four inch by four inch snail I drew with some of my signature, uh, squiggles? I don’t know what these are but I’ve been doing them forever. The ones I currently do in my drawings are a bit different, but this was an old drawing when I first started out with this style. Either way, it was a lot more than I could handle. I wanted the squiggles colored in and I had only done one pass through the whole thing, but I had already spent hours on it and I didn’t want to overwork my skin, so I decided to stop for the day and do it again after it healed. Long story story I developed chronic hives after this tattoo (not related) so it was left unfinished for a while. “A while” being two years. More about those hives in my “The First 20 Years” post if you’re interested. This is the only pic I have of that tattoo, so if looking at hives freaks you out, keep in mind I have mild hives in this picture.

I did a lot of research before tattooing myself. I bought a kit from a website that wasn’t Amazon, and I practiced on a lot of fake skin. I watched a lot of YouTube and Instagram videos by hand poke tattoo artists and read many articles. Yet when I did the tattoos, I still fucked up. It’s in the nature of the practice, when you’re first starting out. I was happy with what I did, though, and I was safe doing it, so that’s all that mattered. About a year passed by, and they faded pretty badly. The ink the kit came with wasn’t the greatest, and I definitely poked too shallow out of fear. I had a friend who expressed interest in stick and poke, and since I had a lot of supplies, I invited them over to use some and pretty much showed them how to hand poke. I wasn’t the best teacher considering the last time I had done it I barely knew what I was doing, but they knew it wasn’t going to turn out perfect and didn’t mind. I touched up my X on my middle finger while they did a smiley face on their middle finger. I just checked in with them a couple days ago, and about a year later, it still looks pretty good. Still quite dark, so clearly they poked deep enough. This time after my tattoo I actually did aftercare and treated it well. It was a good experience. We watched Adventure Time while doing it, and it’s a great memory for me. I think that’s what tattooing should be all about.

Why I’m Even Writing This

Last week, I was having a hard day. I was deep in relationship problems that I thought was going to end it, and leave me having to move two hours away from the city I call home, to move into my sister’s apartment with her and her boyfriend. That is, of course, better than being unhoused, but there were a number of reasons why this would be my last option. There were also a number of reasons why me being unhoused was a very real worry at the time if my relationship ended. This isn’t about that, though, so I digress.

The night prior, right as the relationship problem started, I had reached out to a friend to come pick me up and take me to their place. I can’t drive and I needed to get out of the apartment for a bit. We weren’t that close, never hung out outside of a group, but they were my only friend who lived near me and had their own place. We ended up talking about what was happening in my relationship, and as five hours passed, we talked about other things as well. Tattoos got brought up, as they inevitably do when I’m talking to, well, pretty much anyone.

This friend had a few tattoos on their arms. They had a stick and poke done with a sewing needle and pen ink that a friend did years and years ago, and a professionally done stick and poke with incredible detail. I say stick and poke because that’s the word they used. This is the first friend I have that has both hand poked tattoos and machine done tattoos, so I was pretty excited to ask about the difference, specifically with the pain. I don’t remember much of what they said because it was a week ago at this point and I had a lot on my mind, but some key things they said was that the hand poked ones hurt a lot less, and the machine done ones ended up feeling numb after a while because of all the buzzing.

I mentioned that eventually I want to be a tattoo artist, and it felt like they lit up. They said that they thought I would be a good one. I honestly think I give off tattoo artist wannabe vibes so it was very nice to hear someone else say it would fit me well. I said that I haven’t tattooed myself in a long time, at least a year at that point. I told them that what they said made me want to start up again, and now was as good a time as any considering I’m unemployed and quite literally have nothing better to do. Not to mention I really needed the distraction at the time. I said that I would spend the next day practicing or maybe even touching up one of my old tattoos that you can barely see now that it’s been two years since I’ve done them.

Without going into too much detail, the next day after talking with my friend, things got unimaginably worse. This was last Friday. I was experiencing thoughts of wanting to self harm, which was something that I hadn’t experienced in at least a month. The emotions I was feeling at the time were overwhelming. They were the kind of feelings that I knew self harm would immediately fix. Put me in control when I thought my whole existence was coming to an end. I thought that I had made my mind up while I was sitting in the bathroom having my second panic attack of the day. I don’t know what stopped me from doing it. Maybe it was because I was thinking about the therapy session I had that morning before everything went to shit. I had told my therapist that I was going to spend the day practicing tattooing while waiting for the inevitable conversation my partner and I would have to have. I didn’t expect the conversation to come so quickly after my session ended, which is one of the reasons I had such an extreme reaction. I guess I decided to go through with what I told her I was going to do, but now the urge had moved to tattooing myself instead of fake skin. Practice is practice, I suppose.

I got out my supplies and set everything up and decided to basically re-poke my second tattoo that was on my shin. I spent a few hours doing it while watching House M.D. and it made everything a lot better. Afterwards, I was writing everything that had happened the previous few days down for my next therapy appointment. I realized I had “urge to self harm” and “tattooed myself” in the same sentence. I was worried that it would come across like I had exchanged the razor for a tattoo needle in a way to cause myself harm. I decided to spend some time thinking about the difference in self tattooing and self harming for me and if they were related.

I looked online to see if people had written about a connection between self harm and tattoos. I wanted to hear others' thoughts, especially people in the mental health field. I, of course, found some people saying that body modifications were an extreme form of self harm or that body modifications were only done by people who were mentally ill. That’s definitely not what I was looking for. I found this article, though, which interested me. I decided to sit down and write through the process and intent of my self harm vs. my tattooing, and what the similarities were, if any.

The Difference Between My Self Harm and My Self Tattooing

I went through the feelings I have before, during, right after, and the following days after I self harm or tattoo.

Before I self harm, I look forward to it. I’m clear headed, sure, and confident. During it, my thoughts start to devolve. I get a little panicky and shaky, and no longer feel clear headed or confident. I try to make it quick. I do it without looking, and as fast and as much as possible. If it’s an especially painful one I pause for a second or so, usually let out a curse and try to calm myself with some quick rocking back and forth, then go back in before I lose my nerve and can’t continue any longer. Right after, I feel a lot of relief, and am nervous but smiley. Not happy, but I smile pretty much immediately. It’s not because I find it funny, either, but it has to do with the immense relief. I feel grounded again. I get rid of everything quickly, never clean myself up, and immediately go do something else. Then comes the shame. I used to be the kind of person to track my “clean” days, so every time I relapsed, there was deep sadness and frustration when it finally sinks in what I had done. The following days after I self harm, I will hit or slap the harmed area quickly when I experience something triggering or upsetting in any way. A hit of pain helps ground me and make me feel more in control, and reminds me of what I did to gain control. After a few days I can finally look at the area I harmed, and I look at it closely, running my fingers over it, and bringing it up to my face so it’s the only thing I can see and focus on. Self harm helps me in the moment, but immediately afterwards I feel so much worse. The days following, it helps me through other triggers, but instead of using my healthly coping mechanisms, I automatically re-injure myself.

Before I tattoo, I’m anxious but excited and prepared. During it, I am slow and careful and will look at the area I’m tattooing closely, taking my time with the piece until I feel like I’m done. I pause for a bit if there’s a lot of pain, and let myself take a rest and come back to it in a while if I need to. Right after, I’m happy and proud. I’m still learning tattooing, so it can be quite a hard and long process, but that just makes me more proud of myself for being able to do it. My focus is then on carefully wrapping up the tattoo and taking care of it, and then slowly putting everything away, being mindful of not hitting my tattoo accidentally. I spend time afterwards looking at it and appreciating my work. The following days after I tattoo myself, I am careful to not touch it, hit it, or scrape it. I leave the second skin on for a while, looking at it every so often, which makes me happy. After the second skin is off, I spend time taking care of it using tattoo ointment, then moisturizing when it’s ready, and am careful to not have any rough contact with it.

I realized that I don’t tattoo for the pain, but for the closeness it brings to my body. Tattooing myself is very grounding. I have to listen to my body and be aware of where my hand is and where I’m tattooing, how I’m stretching the skin, where the needle is going. It’s a ritual of caring for my body, in addition to putting something that makes me happy on my body using my own hand. The pain is just a byproduct of the tattoo, while the pain of self harm is one of the only things that matters.

Using Self Tattooing as a Substitute for Self Harm

The next morning when I had my therapy session, I brought this all up to my therapist. She made some great points that made me feel more secure in how I was feeling. She said that tattooing myself was a substitute for self harm. Pain is just a sensation, and it’s something that’s okay to endure or even seek out. Tattooing myself is a creative and regulated pain that doesn’t put me in harm's way or make me unsafe. Just because there is pain in an activity, doesn’t mean it’s a form of self harm. I have five facial piercings, which all hurt to get, but the purpose of getting them was to have cool metal in my face, which then connects me more to my body. Even people who do things like body suspension do it for reasons other than the pain. And if pain is the main reason why you’re doing something, I don’t necessarily think that’s a bad thing. Speaking as a masochist and a sadist, pain can be enjoyable in many different ways. There’s a difference between self harm and being hurt. Safety has a big part to play in it, as does listening to your body when it tells you to stop.

Because I wanted marks on my skin at all times, I would self harm constantly. With a tattoo, it’s a one and done deal. I do it and then it’s there forever. There’s no need to constantly keep it up, causing more pain and injury each time. The fact that I designed my tattoos myself aids in the grounding and “I am real” feeling that skin drawings have given me in my life. When I tattoo I am clear headed and not overly emotional. When self harming, I am very vulnerable and on edge. Each time I leave a mark it's different than the last, and I couldn’t care less about how deep I’m going. It’s a very dangerous process that I would do very often. I stopped tracking my clean days, but I know it’s been a while since I self harmed. Having tattoos to look at instead makes me a lot happier.

Closing Thoughts

As of writing this, I re-poked my shin tattoo nine days ago.

I redid my thigh tattoo two days ago, using my tattoo machine for the first time. My partner bought me my machine for our one year anniversary in October of 2021, and I’ve practiced with it a few times. I definitely should have done more research considering most of my tattoo knowledge came through hand poke and my previous knowledge of machine tattooing is quite a few years old and I don’t remember some of it. I had to look up a few things. I spent around three hours on it, but mostly because I took 10 minute breaks very frequently. I’m going to be honest, machine tattooing sucked. I felt I had less control and it was so so so much more painful than handpoke. I definitely want to make a different post talking about my experience with hand poke vs machine. I think I’m going to stick with hand poke for the most part. But long story short, I stopped halfway-ish through because I couldn’t handle the pain anymore and I was having trouble with the needle I was using. Fucking magnums. I’m going to let it heal and then handpoke the snail and finish the squiggles with, unfortunately, my tattoo machine.

Art has been incredibly beneficial to me for a large portion of my life. It has helped me through very rough times. Even now, when something has happened and my nervous system is dysregulated, I end up grabbing my iPad and making some vent art. It instantly makes me feel better and provides an outlet for anger, sadness, and any other emotion I might have. It also helps me to process my feelings. Art and body modifications are one of the most important things in my life, and they both have helped me to connect with myself, in general and also in my trans identity. I’m going to be saying this phrase a lot, as you have seen so far, so get ready; this is something that I want to write about more in depth at some point.

I’d say that’s all. This only took, I don’t know, a little less than a week to write. Finding the pictures and placing them here correctly was the hardest part. So far the two things I have written have been very long, a little over 5,000 words. Hopefully soon I can write something a bit more simple. And hopefully soon I can figure out how to end something without outright saying “the end.” Anyway. Thanks for reading!

The End :D

#trans #queer #body mods #body modifications #tattoos #piercings #personal essay #tw: self harm #self harm and tattoos #self harm and body mods #personal writing #queer body mods #queer tattoos

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unknowncallers-world · 1 year

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About a year ago, I wrote things about my ex that weren’t true. I was just so fucking numb I didn’t know what tf was going on. About a year ago, she was with Alyssa. And Alyssa dmed me telling me I was treating Taylor like shit and I was saying things I shouldn’t be saying. At the time I was hanging out with Shannen and I told Alyssa I was taken, which she didn’t believe. I mean I wasn’t taken. I lied. I lied about everything because I felt like everyone was better off without me but at the same time I didn’t want to feel like I did anything wrong. I was such a shit person. I still can’t believe who I was a year ago. Last year I started my med school rotations. I was happy with Taylor. Then something changed and I just became depressed and I refused to admit I needed help. We broke up. Of course that wasn’t all my fault. But the rest of it was. I couldn’t give Taylor space. I fucking wrote her a love poem. I fucking stalked her on twitter and tumblr. I would type her name in on Snapchat and ig to see if she unblocked me. Everything was a fucking mess. I was a fucking mess. I was so depressed. Not even the gym could help. I was eating like shit and too depressed to workout because I couldn’t stand to be in my own head. But then I got help. I got meds. And I worked on myself. I got better. I tried to heal. But once that started, I realized all of the ducking mistakes I made were it’s Taylor. I saw how shit and wrong I was and all I wanted was her back. Then randomly in November, i was checking like I always did to see if I was still blocked and I wasn’t. I remember writing on here that I wouldn’t reach out to her after everything that happened in hopes she was still reading this and would reach out. That same night I was dreaming about her and tbh I love dreaming about her because it’s like the only connection I have left. But that night it was like 1am. She followed me and dmed me. I thought maybe this was our chance. The next day or maybe a couple days later she asked what I was doing. She randomly called me and we talked for a few hours. Right after that I had therapy and I knew I still loved her. I wanted to tell her so bad. So i did and she didn’t say anything. I tried so hard not to care. But eventually I just pretended like nothing happened. We started dming more everyday. We started being friends on switch and playing Minecraft together and we would talk on the phone. Then over thanksgiving she went to Arizona where I’m assuming she met her current girlfriend. I told her I loved her again. She didn’t say anything. About a week later she wrote me back. I still have that screenshot to this day, 8 months later. It was during the World Cup and all I said was that it was ok. She said she rooted for Messi for me and I said thanks. Then she started posting about Jackie more. One of the hardest things I did was to unfollow her. Eventually I went back to Illinois and I had a rough few weeks. I felt shitty. But eventually I started making new friends and going out more. I became happy. I met J who ended up being my girlfriend. I mean I asked her to be my girlfriend. I told her I loved her first. She visited me in Philly. I’m visiting her in Chicago in a few weeks. We talk about living together and all I can think is why do I feel more brave now to be with my girlfriend than I did with Taylor. Of course it was because taylor was my first girlfriend well my first relationship and I didn’t know what to do. But lemme say I haven’t gone one fucking day without thinking about her. We matched and talked on Snapchat in December 2020. I remember seeing her stories when she was in Greece randomly. I remember always liking when she would check out my story. Then when we matched again September 2021 and started talking again, i was in shock about how it was turning out. We don’t follow each other on ig but not a day goes by where I don’t randomly type in her name. Not a day goes by where I don’t miss her. Not a day goes by where I low key hope they break up because I want her back. That won’t change. It will never change.

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thesecretattic · 1 year

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DEATH NOTE

Kisiki do logo ki laash pe se apni “wannabe” Shaadi baraat nikaale simply cuz everyone else was marrying in Cov times. Shameless people Harsh and his FAKE lugaai she should read this and see how serious it is especially about Aditya Singh Rajput and his death and my death. More SHOCKING things about Harsh and what he said or did back then he turned the tables after that. Please read it entirely it’s VERY IMPORTANT.

“I was pretty too at 20-21 I was looking fair and cute without makeup in broad daylight BUT he ruined me”

I was struggling to breathe n I was breathing in bits I can’t walk even upto the bathroom my pressure was falling tremendously and my vision had turned WHITE and blurry I couldn’t see anything in the bathroom and I cud feel numb and lifeless and all the blood levels being sucked out of my brain I was cold inside it was chilly ice cold in my head I’m somehow writing this

Its VERY IMPORTANT pls read it I had to jot it down again ignore typos or lack of punctuation marks. Relying on autocorrect.

You all know that he Harsh Jayesh Rajput came first to me and the story has been going on since the past 8-10 years! All MY YOUTH I’m dyin-g a lip virgin or virgin today I was treated like an untouchable now no one will accept me in this age

NEXT you’ve seen the SHOCKING OBVIOUS signs along with all the markings in my previous posts (at least from June 2023 I’ve been sharing them since years now and there are more than 1000s of coincidences or signs since the past 10 years there’s not been a single day I haven’t received them) they all revolve around me and Harsh

Yet inspite of that since he himself came AND THEN STARTED ACTING ODD like OCD for no reason he wud like my pics on some dating app they had a Snapchat like feature he was already in my list and you could upload 24 hr selfies or posts he would religiously like them BUT not utter a single word, I have all the screenshots in my old laptop, he had also ASKED for my bb pin but he was not adding either and then he was talking to my fake ID which he knew was me he even taunted and left innuendos he was asking if I was single and sending kiss emojis even on day one he was sounding very happy but he was blocking the REAL ID and he was going on being ambivalent and bipolar he would come and then block.

I didn’t want to say all that, I can’t share much in detail my hands and feet are ice cold and I’ve cried a lot and I have fever too and my health condition was already critical since the past 3 days I’ve been struggling and hampering to breathe I can’t even walk up to the bathroom I told u what happened. That’s why I’ve been sleeping for hours throughout the day I’ve been up since 12 am today the whole night crying due to my mother’s torture and this issue.

IN 2019 I sent those gifts to make up for the book and because his fans would not send anything, Taher and Aneri wud always flaunt, I had stopped watching TV in 2015 itself and I’ve never heard his voice in real life, so I was NOT some fan he came first he was interested he was asking for the bb pin je was liking the photos he was sending kiss emojis FIRST and he was asking if I was single, he had used WORDS LIKE “DEAR AND DARLING” I still remember cuz I’m not used to this, someone using such terms of endearments for me, no one talks to me leave alone nicely. I know it’s cheesy but I have mixed feelings about it cuz it was him I thought it was safe.

I SENT those gifts to makeup for the book even thought I had not divulged anything about him in the book I have high fever n low pressure + shallow breathing I might just die after writing this post pls read I sent them across hoping I’ll find someone ELSE cuz he just went away without giving me a chance I have mentioned how he was luring me with the kisses and those other things go READ them had to say that, but then he SHOWED everyone that it was one sided and he humiliated me publicly in front of the world,

Since he was doing that I thought I’ll find someone else eventually and the gifts were just to makeup for the book which had nothing about him I wanted to make him happy cuz i loved him but I could only do it materialistically because he hated me now (due to unknown reasons) I was like he can take those things and be happy and I can love him from far or send him that love and I’ll find someone else but he took that opportunity again to humiliate me, he didn’t thank I had made those cards and everything on my own and wrapped those 14 gifts on an EMPTY stomach but he didn’t thank nor did he return them cuz of that OCD of direct contact which grew after 2015 even more, back then he allowed himself to talk to the fake ID or just like the pics and he was then using his engaged friend’s ID that too on the dating app HE CONNECTED with me there and added me on Instagram I had shared about it on my blog the article was - Biggest Revelation or something it has a HUGE shocking sign too. He had even read that (Harsh Jayesh Rajput) anyway his OCD grew so much that he became insensitive (go through all my posts from 2020 pandemic year IT WAS ON A VERY HEINOUS LEVEL) I’m dy-ing today after 8 years of total (bed) confinement because of him, and he neither thanked nor returned the gifts to avoid any contact (OCD) and he was sitting there making fun or god knows what. Like I said I was giving them to makeup for the book and I had already thought I’ll find someone else but He even took that opportunity to reject and humiliate me in front of my cruel mother and his friends and family and eventually on internet, he himself had sent kisses and called me all sorts of things (terms of endearment) he was religiously liking the pics he was vying for that bb pin and from behind he was showing everyone that I was chasing him.

The coincidences and signs continued and next he got worse during the pandemic year AFTER which I started writing about him to seek help or to wake him up.

HE received my messages on iMessage sat there SEEING OUR SIGNS AND MARKINGS until He changed them and now I see Aneri’s numbers which torture me there’s always 53 & 23 together (5 is him and 2 is me) it started as our marriage signs you’ll understand when you’ll read my previous posts but now I see 63 somewhere lurking around along with her birthdate. I’m done. He can have a threes-ome like he said (it was his fantasy) to that fake acc he can have that with that now porno Nida and Aneri she was wearing straps and what not on her thighs that Nida no pants just like Harsh if he’s so obsessed he can do that. I want a REAL love story and actual passion if at all not such FAKE ORGAS-MS it’s all forced when you force yourself too… otherwise you don’t need handcuffs or garters. It’s in fact tacky, real lovers just need each other after all that’s what it’s all about you don’t need ENTICEMENTS.

If they had what was the most important to me he meant the entire world I loved style even when he was poor and he would repeat clothes I loved him for the same attire even the 50th time, my name happened to be Zara for a reason like the brand I was born like that my grandmother named me she wasn’t even aware of the brand. I wud dress up like that since I was a toddler. But those cheap girls had his LEATHER JACKET and Ear Stud so now I don’t want him. I’m not a beggar enough of this! Or else I’ll change my gender. I’ve cried enough.

They had him at his best even when I loved him at his worst.

This is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING:

I LOVED HIM A LOT I NEVER STALKED HIM AFTER 2016 Feb n I had stopped watching tv in 2015 itself whatever I came across was accidentally through other people, anyway I HATED myself and I was feeling very hopeless but then I remembered that I loved him even when he was looking dark in his Photos back then in 2014-15 in fact that’s why I had chosen him because I wud stay away from people who were fair and white or rich. So I chose him cuz I thought he was like me (fair-golden-dark mixed) or darker I don’t exactly fall into that dusky category but I’m not white. I’m losing breath I can’t write I’m numb I’m dy-ing I’ll copy paste rest everything from an old post cuz I’ll be reiterating it anyway. BUT FIRST I have to write this down somehow - I told myself I hate how I am and I know no will ever accept me I’m an “untouchable virgin” I got a reality check on 5th mar regarding the extent to which anyone can hate and all the INSENSITIVITY he left me to die and so did others I was open to someone “new” I had decided to find another person I thought someone else will come along even while sending those gifts I WAS ENTIRELY RELIANT on somebody else (who just wasn’t there) because Harsh was not there for me either, I kept getting abused ruthlessly I was beaten up a day PRIOR to the gifts I couldn’t sleep on one side my neck and head were swollen and even my fingers and hands with purple marks in this fibromyalgia I was beaten to death and even told I should die, I already had fever and infection also back then but I got only beatings no rest was up all night no medicine and no food had to ear my antibiotics on empty stomach then 5th Mar happened and I realised how much I was HATED.

My CONVICTIONS grew after that and I realised why THERE WAS NO ONE he had not given me any chance either although he had come first sent kiss emojis religiously liked several pics throughout the month, asked if I was single asked for the bb pin somehow used his friend to fetch my Instagram acc and also called me Dear and Darling etc. etc. But inspite of that and tons of signs he hated me and I realised he probably had superficial shallow reasons to do that and so did everyone else SO I DECIDED FIGHT BACK cuz I knew I would die alone in this abusive house if I won’t.

I was pretty too at 20-21 I was looking fair and cute without makeup in broad daylight BUT he ruined me

I remembered that all these factors which make me feel hopeless now after he has spoilt my looks were the same things I OVERLOOKED he was 7 years older than me and I was 20 back so it’s not like he didn’t have bad days, I said I hate myself but I loved him even when I saw his feet in the pic they were looking Dark Brown Sindbad promotional event when i last stalked in 2016 Feb I still loved him and told myself you can’t even imagine hating someone’s tired feet white or black, especially him I loved him blindly and dearly. And in other pics he was looking dark extremely dark so I thought he looked like that naturally otherwise I wud distance myself from fair or rich ppl NEVER even now, is a NO so I didn’t hate him in fact I loved him but I’m hopeless, then I was thinking about weight gain due to my sedentary life HE GOT ME BED RIDDEN otherwise I was 30 kgs due to stress in 2019, but I had a muscular physique (naturally) so I was broader and taller than Aneri not that petite otherwise she will read this and tell everyone I was rejectable she got a love bite I’m an untouchable virgin till now and she will tell everyone I deserved it, no I was broader and slightly taller too due to my bone structure (long hands and legs) they would tell me I should become a model when I was in my teens

He ruined that also, but I saw a sign which reminded me of something related to him so it wasn’t just his dark feet or complexion I had also seen his double chin in 2014-15 and puffy face and pimples too and I still loved him dearly. And when I was talking about “tond” Hindi word which another girl had mentioned cuz she was conscious about it I remembered THAT IN HIS BIRTHDAY pic he had that also! When I last saw in 2016 and I still loved and respected him inspite of that TOND I would’ve never left him and been around forever and ever I loved him that much

and I was punished for it.

He was poor too I still loved him. I was okay with 1% of looks and 99% ugliness or whatever poor financial status poor grammar etc. the complexion the tond the double chin the repeat clothes everything I had to share that cuz I want other girls to understand that you are NOT a loser if you feel conscious about the same things. I liked him irrespective of that and I didn’t want anyone else but him. Unfortunately he wasn’t like that and he turned out completely different and wrong I told God if he would’ve sent someone who was actually like that (full of flaws) he wouldn’t have done this. He is very proud of himself. I cried a lot even while arguing with God.

I was okay with 1% looks like I said but I didn’t want someone who was scary, boring, dull, random or creepy. I am from Gen Z he’s a millennial his parents are boomers mine are Gen X so obvs I wanted someone who would speak my language and keep up with my pace, someone of my caliber who would fathom what I’m saying but I was FORCED to talk to illiterate ppl who were adding me as “secret admirers” random creepy salacious pervs from Bhopal and all they would not understand a single word in English totally incoherent and uneducated ppl all uncouth from some village area, they weee creepy ugly not even those 1% looks scary NO STYLE even if he repeating his clothes it was different this man was nowhere like him I’m from a metropolitan city from the newer generation NO ONE WILL ACCEPT OR TOLERATE THIS NONSENSE! That perv ewww his eyes were demonic as if he wud wear Kajal (kohl) and he was very lecherous and all yucks full por-nhead I didn’t deserve that! He couldn’t even say “What’s up?” No youthfulness I wanted someone of my level like Harsh but he was chasing ppl out of his league.

And here’s the BIGGEST thing which haunts me and makes me cry day and night, whenever he wud block I wud black out and get a hammering headache and my heart wud stop too after that I got that destabilising “cluster headache” issue and fibromyalgia due to constant torture he kept blocking and liking sporadically FOR NO REASON but he was trying to lure and humiliate me and show me - this is the main part due to which I can’t live and I cry, he was trying to prove that I’m my worst nightmare I’m a “creep” like that Bhopali perv and I deserve to get married or rapd by one. It’s the same thing if girls aren’t attracted (moreover he’s illiterate n pervy and he doesn’t even understand any English or anything to talk in common he won’t understand my ideas he’s to salacious anyway) ITS NOT “double standards you misogynists” there’s a scientific réason which I HAD ALREADY DEFIED for his wrinkles, his advanced age, his double chin, his complexion which was there in the photos his Tond (that Hindi word) his horrible haircut, and all those erroneous pics which made me believe he was ugly in real life and natural lighting only 1% looks where 0.5% was style and personality, AND I STILL LOVED HIM

I defied that scientific logic for him cuz I loved him.

I can’t get rapd by someone who doesn’t even have that 1 or 0.5% you want to read that tond part again? If we aren’t attracted then we aroused and then we are not lubricated either and then it’s forced entry which is r-ape. Lubricators don’t work so many girls have complained and why shud I?

I was molested when I was in KG as a toddler that’s how our life is in India and I shud let someone like that creep touch me? Forget lubrication!

He showed me that I’m my worst nightmare and I deserve that.

That Bhopali and another Bihari guy TOOK ADVANTAGE OF HIM (didn’t want to get communal not all Biharis are such but ppl are sick of each other in their own culture even in our religion I don’t want to get married to Dadi-walas bearded men cuz they keep 2-3 wives illegally another girl was complaining about it that too in Hijab don’t underestimate Muslim girls) so they took advantage of that and created an ID called Harsh last year to write something in their horrible grammar/English and then as a backup plan block me to torture me more as Harsh this time he wasn’t him it was a fake ID but he blocked too and made Preet block me too after I sent those LINKS with signs cuz he hates them and he doesn’t want to see them I sent them again from my laptop’s iMessage. He turned a blind until he managed to get Aneri’s signs too (the DEVIL shows her numbers) I had seen Zara Rajput NOT just numbers like her’s and I had also seen several ZH here and there and even SHARED all those shocking screenshots all across social media, with all the relevant markings and stuff. Our names had again come up with 53-23 marriage signs and all this has happened many times before, even our birthdates but he will not even look at them

I wanted a platonic relationship but then some fortune telling site LITERALLY SHOWED ME this - I wasn’t expecting that it had my words which I never VOICED

I would say in my head that I don’t want to ruin anyone’s life I don’t like “INJUSTICE” even though scientifically it pains girls not men if they aren’t attracted to anyone, but I opted to be the nail instead of the hammer cuz I don’t want to be my worst nightmare like he showed, so that was however the Injustice part I like fairness and I didn’t want injustice for anymore so I came up with platonic which meant love and care but no intimacy, but I knew that the other person might not care if he’s not ready to (fully) accept me in a complete relationship like I overlooked Harsh and all those things if it’s not like that then I can’t expect much concern either.

The site said “Going through the hardest things ever, unimaginable struggles and pain but Giving Blind JUSTICE to others and ignoring the natural and immediate need for care, love and intimacy.” It’s as they read my platonic idea or mind :/

I jotted it down so that I can be more comfortable in a platonic relationship but I didn’t want to budge from that. Or else I wanted you o be just house mates. I was cute and fair once and his pics too had only that 1% looks and I loved him but things changed and he left me behind. And even ruined me.

He is making me feel like I’m my worst nightmare you know how or why you’ve read enough I can’t keep typing you know he’s still DOING THAT he knows about the ring too and those signs and the Devil’s involvement BE KEPT TURNING A BLIND EYE until his Friend DIED and how shameless he’s still doing that.

Fetch Diana’s post she was afraid of car accidents and the devil made sure her car would run into the 13th pillar and there were more numbers which I can’t even take here which I saw in Harsh’s case cuz he was HELPING THE DEVIL in surfacing me my worst fears and nightmares, inspite of OUR MARRIAGE signs he got married and it still kills le I wasn’t ready to stalk him so the Devil Killed Aditya Singh Rajput like Diana to show me Harsh’s ring. He knew my fear of rings EVEN IN INDIA where it’s highly uncommon, they exchange rings there but I was afraid of spotting a gold ring on his ring finger which I eventually saw at the funeral.

He was insensitive to me and he left me to did but that new fake wife had him wrapped around her finger in no time he was putting reels with Jiya hardly in Oct last year I saw due to an accidental click on a fanclub ID and within a few months that new woman GOT HIM LAID that too forever. He didn’t throw the ring. I’m dyi-ng after this I just wanted to share this whole culminated note to describe everything for one last time but his love for her and insensitivity towards me is killing me that too for no reason - Zara Sauleh Bye you’ll never see more signs again I’m dy-ing forever. He was the worst man I had ever met after my mother I’m dyin-g that virgin and it’s okay ur fake wife must be used to this, she’s that creep you were showing me she’s SHAMELESS and opportunistic that that Bhopali to take advantage and come and sleep with someone else’s LOVE I’m not you’ve read enough.

Zara Sauleh

Additional notes copy pasted after which I’ll die a silent death:

Aneri was white like Mohsin and Aaditya Kapadia and Srman Harsh was never that fair, Aaditya however is married a girl who’s dusky and darker than me, and Srman too was seen with the darkest girl possible way more darker than me… it was some random sketchy girl though anyway Harsh is the only one chasing someone whiter. And HE TURNED OUT TO BE MY WORST NIGHTMARE

For girls it’s not easy to look good, we lose a lot of haemoglobin count during periods, speaking of pms this is why it’s easier for men to look better - we get PMS symptoms for almost 20 days they start before our period at times even 11-12 days prior and last all the way for another 10 days and then Ovulation, during both the times we are in pain even during the latter and our skin breaks out, our hair is frizzier, we get bloating not only in the stomach but also in the face, fingers and legs… so if we’ll match our looks we are going to end up with someone who’s dumb average minded and it’s riskier because as “men” they aren’t safe they don’t have noble intentions, these same people who wouldn’t have anything to talk about will only think of fcking and it hurts girls not men if we aren’t turned on or aroused, none of us is in interested in their body girls have assets to turn men on men have nothing, except for the face and some even have a very feminine physique even though women are more likely to gain weight (again due to science and comparatively a slower metabolism) so they literally have nothing and if we aren’t aroused then we aren’t lubricated (girls have already said lubricators don’t work) when we aren’t lubricated it’s a FORCED ENTRY ITS RAPE I mean clearly we are not even interested… then they don’t match our mentality thoughts or caliber eww. In India the problem is men are chasing girls who are out of their league they all want someone one notch higher when the fact is it’s easier for them to look good unlike us who face pms and ovulation (read that again) for 30 days that’s almost a month so it should have been the other way round.

0 notes

oscar-piastri · 3 years

Note

There a few things that just don’t seem right to me about the Marcus evidence:

1. Why not share a screenshot of the whole conversation? Why only show the extract? The evidence i’ve seen doesn’t even have his name on it.

2. The profile picture from the screenshot doesn’t match so if it is his account, it means she took the screenshot earlier and only shared it now. Why wait almost 8 months to expose someone? I haven’t seen anything to prompt a reveal now.

3. If it was genuine and she felt she needed to call him out, why didn’t she say anything to him at the time? She seemed to laugh about it and now take the high ground now.

4. Some people on Twitter have said the name wasn’t showing as Marcus a few minutes afterwards, and there are screenshots from a couple of hours afterwards showing it wasn’t but there are people backing up her story saying it does show his name almost 4 hours after it was shared.

5. If she is friends on him on his private Snapchat surely the best evidence is to take a screenshot of something he has privately posted? I’m struggling to believe she would take a screenshot of a conversation in which he tells her his username but not take any screenshots of actual photos.

6. If her evidence is genuine and not faked, is it even him? Oscar Piastri posted recently about people pretending to be him and Callum has complained about it before. Again surely the main evidence that it is actually him would be something he posted.

I genuinely don’t understand why someone would make something like this up and go to the effort of faking evidence in support of this. Especially as it undermines real victims who are often unfairly scrutinised so I would like to think no one would go to all that effect to try and ruin someone’s reputation. However, there are just too many niggling doubts that this doesn’t seem quite right.

If it’s genuine, he really is an idiot as surely he should have realised how inappropriate it was - especially after the whole Black Lives Matter movement - and Ferrari urgently need to take some action and at the very least give their junior drivers some diversity training. (Although I’m sure Callum has said before that they get social media training which I would have thought would cover what is appropriate behaviour on these platforms)

Actually, I think all junior driver programmes should have diversity and sexual harassment awareness training as standard.

Sorry for the rant.

yessssssssssssss i agree with that

#and that is all i will say #cassy's answers #anons

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the8gates · 4 years

Text

Naruto Characters and What Music I Think They Would Listen To Pt.1

Naruto

-You know those popular boys from school? The emoji tracksuit kids that like dunked on you when you walked through a door?

-Those vibes

-He listens to almost exclusively mainstream rap. It has to be 🔥🔥🔥 ya know?

-Always talking about the new Drake album or the new Kanye album. LOVES Chance the Rapper and Childish Gambino i just see it in his eyes.

Sasuke

-This fuckin guy

-See, my knee jerk reaction is like your emo classics. Pierce the Veil, MCR, Linkin Park. Screamo. Metal.

-But no. We have similar temperaments and I think that kind of music would actually irritate him.

-I think he’s emo but more mainstream soundcloud rapper emo. Lil Peep, $UICIDEBOY$, Lil Uzi Vert. LOVES XXXTentacion.

-Post screenshots of what he’s listening to on his snapchat story and you just know the boy is going THROUGH it.

Sakura

-OKAY so HERE is your rock and roll/metal baddie!!!

-hear me out. when she’s young its all pop. like y2k pop with R&B leanings. Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Beyonce, etc. you get the idea

-but after training under Tsundae she picks up rock. starts with some classic rock at first, then slowly progresses.

-this girl loves Metallica and Black Sabbath. she just loves rock. Zeppelin, AC/DC, Five Finger Death Punch. All of it. I will not be taking any criticism.

-windows down in the car, headbanging always.

Kakashi

-this one is a little difficult to nail down

-a part of me just wants to throw him in the pool of doesn't really care and will listen to anything

-i think he’s got a different playlist for every mood

-R&B sexy playlist with the Weeknd and some Justin Timberlake (yes he thinks that's sexy), soft sad boy hours playlist with Post Malone and Russ, a party mix with some your standard frat boy bops.

-overall, he listens to a lot of popular music

Yamato/Tenzou

-another tough one to nail down!!!

-i truly think Yamato is a man of all tastes as well

-however.... i get country music vibes???

-not like new, pop, country. but the classics. Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, Dolly Parton.

-he also likes jazz! and big band/swing. Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin. What i would refer to as whiskey drinkin music. kinda classy and fun

Sai

-girl

-i truly do not know

-the man is an enigma

-i think once he joins team 7 and kinda strays away from the foundation he’s gonna be all about trying new stuff

-so one day he’s listening to Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran and Ariana Grande. Radio pop, entry level shit

-and the next time you see him its songs he heard on tiktok exclusively

-eventually he’s down a rabbit hole, consuming music in mass quantities and he’s into Crystal Castles and Grimes. Then next week its Tupac and Notorious B.I.G. Then it’s Judas Priest and Guns N Rose.

-everyone just gives up trying to keep track

Shikamaru

-oh its male manipulator music ALLLL DAY

-tame impala, mac demarco, the front bottoms, arctic monkeys, modern baseball, the smiths

-you get the idea

-dont necessarily think he's the ‘male manipulator’ type but he’s def the edgy smoking cigs and listening for the lyrics type

-i don't have to go into detail here you know I'm right

Ino

-see, her and Sakura go down similar paths

-she started off with the y2k bubblegum pop phase but her progression is a little more understandable

-shes your typical indie (except they aren't really indie) pop darling. Lana Del Rey, Lorde, Marina and Diamonds, Melanie Martinez, the 1975.

-what I'm saying is she was definitely on tumblr in 2014 and just never moved past that phase (did any of us tbh)

-as time goes on though she starts to branch out a lil. loves the mainstream women of rap! Cardi B, Megan thee Stallion, Nicki Minaj, Doja Cat. constantly bopping

Choji

-i couldn't find any gifs of this cutie smiling and that's a crime i want addressed RIGHT NOW

-but music wise?? i mean he’s a sweetheart right?? genuinely likes pop music! Ed Sheeran, Maroon 5, Katy Perry. HUGE Bruno Mars fan surprisingly

-i can see him just bopping his head along to the radio, just vibing and not being picky. loves a good ballad. Sam Smith, John Legend.

-hes just having a good time

Hinata

-queen of yearning and pining

-girl in red, mitski, HOZIER

-i feel like her playlist just looks like someone let a closeted queer girl put it together

-ABBA, St. Vincent, Florence + the Machine

-also just soft pop vibes. she’s defo posting sunset videos with the Lumineer’s playing in the background. HEAVY cottage core inspo

Shino

-here is your true emo king

-the trinity of course. P!ATD, MCR, Fallout Boy

-then Twenty One Pilots, Paramore, GORRILAZ

-he gives me also like art kid vibes as he gets older? Weezer, Wallows, Cage the Elephant. you know the type

Kiba

-kinda smilar to Naruto tbh

-but it HAS to be FIRE. no sad music! bass turned up and LOUD always

-i feel like he even went through a dubstep phase.

-hes the guy in the mcdonalds drive thru ‘you know what I'm here for’ *blasts Sicko Mode*

-some stand out faves are Travis Scott, Tyler, the Creator, Kendrick Lamar, Freddie Dredd

-he’s actually pretty cool tbh

Rock Lee

-yall ever been to a football game and they play the same hype songs over and over? ever seen a workout montage in an 80s movie?

-thats this boy. he’s just constantly listening to workout playlists. Eye of the Tiger, Livin’ on a Prayer, Welcome to the Jungle

-outside of that, i would think some of his favorite artists would be things Gai would listen to. Billy Joel, Bon Jovi, the BEASTIE BOYS, Foreigner, Aerosmith

-what I'm trying to say is he listens to the same music ur dad listens to

Neji

-fucking music SNOB

-’you've probably never heard of them’ headass

-and then its like the strokes or vampire weekend or some shit jfc

-male manipulator music part two but 100% fits the stereotype. hes gonna leave you on read and then cry to the Yeah Yeah Yeahs.

-some standout favorites are the Pixies, Neutral Milk Hotel, alt-J.

-likes some other stuff too. The White Stripes, The Black Keys, some Beck.

-decent taste if he wasn't such an a-hole about it!

Tenten

-ya know what

-hyper pop. 100 gecs, Charli XCX, CMten, SOPHIE, Slayyyter, A.G. Cook.

-i would say she started off kinda like Ino, the 2014 tumblr pop stuff

-then that just got to be too boring. so now she's riding the wave of the super new age stuff.

-neji fucking HATES it and grumbles all the time about ‘its just noise, how can you stand that’ and it only makes her like it more.

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 8 months

Note

AITA for saying this about my friend on Snapchat?

We are both minors (14/15F), and I will be using fake names for everyone involved.

I got sent an ask on send it, asking me to rank who I was better friends with; Zoe or Sophie. I replied with Sophie, even though I’ve known Zoe longer, I was closer to Sophie, and we had more in common. I didn’t say anything bad about Zoe, I just stated that I was better friends with Sophie. This snap was made friends only. The next day, Zoe sends me a screenshot of the post. Zoe doesn’t use Snapchat, so I thought this was weird how she got it. I later found out that my “friend”, Julia sent it to her. (She is not important to the story.) I didn’t reply to her message. Later that night, my mother gets a call from Zoe’s mother (ZM). ZM tells my mother how I was spreading rumors about her daughter on social media, and how she thinks I should delete my account to stop causing drama. My mother later talks to me about her call from ZM, and I show her what ZM is referring to (the snap). My mother is on my side, and I don’t delete my socials.

When we go back to school, Zoe tells everyone that I spread rumors about her on Snapchat. Which isn’t true. I never said anything about her in my post. Zoe comes up to me at lunch, and “confronts” me. She says that it was so mean of me to “spread rumors” about her on a social media platform that she didn’t use. Then she states that I’m targeting her because she a person of color.

I NEVER spread rumors about her, and she turned this whole thing into lies that never happened. (And the part where I supposedly am targeting her because she’s a poc, I never even said ANYTHING about her in the first place!)

now people that are on her side (or the people that don’t have the full context) are avoiding me, and bullying me because I supposedly spread rumors about her and are targeting her because of her race.

So tumblr. Tell me: AITA?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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thweaty · 4 years

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tomdaya tea ☕️

ok i have to submit this because it’s just TEW much to explain otherwise. like i said i stan them both so i been here for it all and know ALL the tea. i’ll give you the rundown of their relationship and then the drama that went down when she was dating jacob. there’s a whole tumblr timeline spanning years you can google if you’re interested in seeing it in detail but i’ll give you the basics. this is going to be a literal dissertation sorry in advance but i feel responsible for letting the general public know about the tomdaya agenda since i know so much

so they started dating in like aug/sept 2016 right after they finished filming homecoming. he went to canada right after to film another movie and during the course of filming she went to visit him and he flew to la to visit her, this is when people started getting sus. when he finished filming this movie he made an ig story about how he was going home to london to be with his family and spend the holidays with them, except he lied because he flew to la to see z and spend thanksgiving with her and her family lmao (he actually spent thanksgiving with her family 3 years in a row 2016-2018….more on that later tho 👀) her cousin exposed them when he posted a video on thanksgiving at her house and you could see her and tom cuddling on the couch. so everyone was like they’re 100% dating. like i said he was always flying to see her, he was going to workout classes with her mom and shit, he always stayed at her house in la (there’s multiple sets of photos of him outside her house with luggage). another thing that convinced people was sometime in early 2017 she made a whole snapchat story about how she was super sick and overworked and then after that accidentally posted a snap to her story that said “your sick girlfriend really loves you”. she deleted it quickly because it was obviously an accident and wasn’t meant to be public but people got screenshots. tom was also in nyc visiting z when she was filming the greatest showman and told a fan he met that he was in town visiting his girlfriend because he dumb.

so at this point we KNOW they’re dating. zendaya is notorious for being extremely private with relationships, the guy she dated before tom she was with for 4 years and called him her best friend all along. she didn’t admit they actually had dated until after they broke up bc he cheated on her. so her being so private with tom and hiding it was expected. all this same shit goes on for the next nearly three years, they’re doing long distance but he flies to see her at least once a month sometimes more, they spend time with each others families, visit each other on set, etc.

so this is where it gets interesting. tom is photographed on the euphoria set during a night shoot in like early may 2019. this is apparently right around the time they break up. tom’s best friend tuwaine was dating this girl audrey and when they broke up she started spilling tea on tomdaya (tom unfollowed her after this so it was def true). she said they broke up in may because they were fighting more due to long distance AND tom was tired of being so private, he didn’t want to be public but was over being so secretive and wanted to be a little more lax but she wasn’t comfortable with that. they decided to stay friends. the far from home press tour was in june and they were clearly still super close friends, nobody could even tell they were broken up cause they were so chummy (looking back now it’s more obvious cause tom was saying shit about his love life being a disappointment and stuff). they go their separate ways after the premiere but stay friends and continue to interact on social media, even months after the breakup tom met a girl at a con dressed like mj and asked if he could take a photo with her to send to zendaya so they were def still talking and stuff

fast forward to feb 2020. z is dating jacob and they’re being papped like every single day in nyc. pictures come out of them kissing out in the open in nyc. as a fan of z this was VERY weird to me because she’s always so private, but i was like maybe she’s trying something new because being so private caused the downfall with tom. BUT then she started DMing her fan accounts on twitter and ig asking them to take the kissing photos down (so idk what happened, she had to knew they were being papped but maybe she had second thoughts and regretted it)…. her fan accounts do delete the photos, but it’s too late. everyone has already seen them including tom, who is in the middle of a self-proclaimed instagram break. the day after the kissing photos came out, he goes back on ig and unfollowed two of z’s best friends, one being her assistant and basically brother darnell who tom was also good friends with. he posts a photo on his story of him drinking and puts emojis over his eyes and said something like “back for a minute, now i’m gone again.” he was going through it lmao so he literally went onto ig to be petty and unfollow people close to z because he was mad she was kissing her bf of a few months in public when they were together for nearly three years. and obviously he couldn’t unfollow her so he did the next best thing, and fans obviously took notice. a week later he followed darnell back cause i guess he realized how bad it looked but the damage was already done. tom and z from then on do not interact or acknowledge each other for the next SIX MONTHS. idk if they fought or if she was mad he unfollowed darnell or what. but it was MESSY.

a month later tom starts dating this girl nadia, she moves into his house a few weeks into dating for quarantine. they date throughout those lockdown months. z breaks up with jacob sometime in june. she gets nominated for the emmy at the end of july, and days after she gets nominated her and tom start liking all of each others photos again. the assumption is he reached out to congratulate her and they made up. a few days after they start interacting again, tom posts a photo of his girlfriend on ig, and z likes it. tom and nadia break up like a week later 💀 he was filming uncharted in berlin at this point, him and z continue to interact, he finishes uncharted and flies right to atlanta to start filming spider-man. they’re still in atlanta now and we know they hang out all the time, but a lot of people think they’re back together because they’ve done some very 👀 things. her mom came to atlanta for thanksgiving and you guessed it… tom spent it with them (which we only know cause the celeb chef who cooked for them posted on his story that he made thanksgiving dinner for zendaya and tom holland. he then deleted and deactivated cause he realized he fucked up lmao). they started interacting with each other’s families and friends again. hunter (jules from euphoria) who is z’s best friend drove to atlanta to see her and her and tom followed each other. tom is very selective of who he follows and doesn’t even follow a lot of his costars so people were shook by this, especially because him and hunter met multiple times before but never followed each other. i have no idea if they’re back together, at the very least they’re good friends again, but i wouldn’t be surprised at all if they were. we’ll see what happens when they finish filming 👀👀👀 lmk your thoughts, questions, concerns etc.

bitch my fave part was zendaya liking that pic and tom and his gf breaking up a week later 😭😭

#my GOD #submission #i kno this is a controversial topic but i love the drama SKNDF #thank u anon >:)

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pnk-wasteland · 3 years

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Screenshot: Adrienette that’s borderline crack in the best way (Teen&up)

It was a nightmare. He hadn’t meant to leave his phone unattended, Alya had asked him a question and when he put his phone down to give her his full attention, Nino had picked it up to check the time and instead was greeted with a private Instagram account Adrien had created with the specific purpose to lurk in peace.

“No way, dude. Do you just stalk a bunch of Ladybug look alikes in your spare time?”

Adrien gaped, too horrified to process his world falling apart around him.

“Wow, look at this one, she looks almost exactly like ladybug!”

“Let me see!” Alya sounded too eager.

He’d never admit it, but there were more than just a few girls on his private Instagram that looked “exactly like” ladybug. And no, it wasn’t just a uncanny accident.

But the account his friend happened to stumble on was his favorite, a well off Russian Instagram model who’s handle was Steelix.

She could pass for a perfect Ladybug, if not for her brown eyes. She was perfect in almost every way, and posted great *ahem* material. Ladybug was the fantasy girl of his dreams and anybody that looked liked her was at risk of being followed and stalked by his private finsta page.

His private page he was privately ashamed of.

That his best friend was now holding up to show his own girlfriend, and the girl Adrien quietly, sort-of had a crush on. This really was his worst nightmare. He tried to snatch the phone from Nino but to no avail. “It’s just some girl. I like her photography.”

“Yeah sure that’s why you liked all her recent pictures and wrote in the comments ‘omg’ with a heart face, a drooling face, and two fire emojis.”

Adrien was red in the face, his mouth gone completely dry not knowing what to say.

“Wow Adrien, these are the kind of girls you like?” Alya asked.

Adrien glanced toward Marinette, and the look on her face was perfectly surprised. Ironically, her face was one of the ones he lives to see grace the screen of his dirty private Insta. Marinette had great Ladybug features right down to the freckles on her nose. The only bad thing was Marinette rarely posted any selfies at all, and although her account was an interesting documentary of her handmade fashions, it did not serve the dirty purpose his fake account had followed her for.

“So what?” He finally grabbed the phone from Nino and was getting back some of his composure, although his face was still deeply flushed.

“Oh no reason.” Alya’s smile was wicked, and it made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up.

——__ __——__ __

Marinette ponders what she just witnessed while Alya blabs in her ear. She wasn’t holding the phone, but it sure looked like he was following a lot of slim girls with shoulder length black hair. If she didn’t know any better she would think he would have a type... And he certainly did nothing to dissuade that idea. He turned beet red and made some dumb excuse about photography. And that girl.. the one whose photo he had commented on, Marinette knew her. Well, she had previously followed her. Steelix has such a similar face structure to her own that she had been a phenomenal teacher of makeup to Marinette. She knew all the right things to use and what products would work on her just by watching what Steelix recommended. She had loved following her for her beauty content, but when her account started becoming more of a travel diary with pictures of her on island beaches in bikinis with inspirational quotes covering the captions, Marinette had to find other places to search for helpful information.

All of these thoughts were making her wonder about Adrien, and the things she had neglected to notice about him.

“If Adrien likes shorter, dark haired girls than why doesn’t he comment on my selfies like that?”

“Umm interrupt me, much?”

Oops, she didn’t mean to say that outloud.

“But maybe because you never post any, especially not to insta.”

Marinette thought about this. It was true she used her IG story to post updates on her Latest creations, and her grid was very much like a well thought out catalog. She was very proud of that page, but it was definitely not the place where she’d be posting cute sundress selfies.

“I use my Snapchat for personal stuff like that.”

“Exactly. And I bet you haven’t even given Adrian your snap.”

Marinette frowned, stealing a glance at the boys table. “No, I guess I haven’t.”

“Well what are you doing sitting here talking to me for? Go get his snap and start using it for evil!”

---_ _ _---_ _ _---

“Hey Adrian! Wait up!”

Adrian was more nervous than he should have been when his friend approached, but he kept the feeling off his face. “Hey Marinette! What’s up?”

She stopped right in front of him, “I was just thinking about earlier, how you have a private instagram account.”

Adrians stomach dropped. Had she figured him out? Did she know he was using her and girls that looked like her to quiet his drowning ache for Ladybug? He was so ashamed of himself. He was weak, so desperately weak.

“And it just got me thinking that I’ve known you so long and we don’t even have each others snaps.”

“I’m so- wait, what?”

“Snapchat. We don’t even have eachother added. So, want to be friends?” Marinette held out her phone, snap code ready for him to scan, her happy little pigtailed Bitmoji smiling up at him.

Something warm ticked his belly. “Yeah, definitely.” He pulled out his phone and added her to his seldom used snap account.

——__ __——__ __

He has to add her on his old account, the one with the list of contacts from kids that once gave him their number. There really isn’t that many.

Adrien finds out quickly that Marinette posts her selfies on snap, and keeps her instagram clean and more professional. Very smart for a girl who is looking to go to college next fall. He clicks on her daily story; a picture of her in her bedroom mirror, a picture of fresh croissants and danish, a picture of Alya, Rose and some other girls at her lunch table, and then finally a selfie. A picture taken from straight above, she was lying down in her bed, light pink and white pajamas that looked like they may have a ribbed texture to them. He could see the edge of the selfie stick she was using to get such a wide angle, the idea that she had planned this sleepy in bed photo turned him on more than he could have ever dreamed. He could see the tops of her exposed thighs where her matching pj shorts abruptly ended. Her lean, exposed belly led up to the cropped short sleeve tshirt, that was so on-trend and so Marinette that he had no doubt she’d made it for herself.

Best of all, her blue eyes stared right back at him through the camera and her lips were puckered just right.

It was as he was getting himself all worked up thinking about the blue of her gaze, easing his own back down her body when he realized something else; she wasn’t wearing a bra. And the way she had arched her back to show off the muscles of her stomach only made it more obvious; and Adrian couldn’t believe he didn’t notice them before. Tiny peaks hidden behind soft pink fabric. He was going to lose his mind.

His heart was beating faster and he swallowed back guilt as he unzipped his pants. Her body was amazing, and he was insanely greatful she left this on infinite. He worked himself till climax thinking about what her nipples must look like beneath that thin pajama top, and what it might feel like to taste them. He kept working himself, more gently, thinking about that face, those lips and those eyes and how bad he wanted her to swallow him. Who? Marinette or Ladybug? Honestly in that moment he didn’t feel like he was using her pictures as a ladybug substitute. He cleaned off his phone and thought seriously if he should use his tablet to take a picture of the screen just so Marinette wouldn’t know he screenshoted her. Another, dirtier part of him wants her to know. Wants to comment on her pictures like he’s some random thirsty nobody. Tell her how she makes him sweat, how he can’t get enough. He wants to use his private page to stalk her, too.

Damn sometimes the lines get too confusing.

He sits there, weighing his options. This picture was too good for him to let go. But he didn’t want to look like he was chasing after Marinette’s thirst traps when he knew he was still just a dirty pervert for Ladybug. Adrien felt like screen recording would be even more creepy than a screenshot, and almost made him feel like he was coping out, being a chump. But if he did screenshot her what would Marinette say? Would she ignore it? Would he be sad if she did?

Adrien shook off his intrusive thoughts and screenshotted his new favorite photo. And for good measure; and maybe so he could feel like he was making a move instead of just drooling over his classmate; he sent “wow” with an emoji it took him way too long to choose. Stuck between the drooling or hot emoji he finally got fed up with himself tapped his screen and sent it off without letting himself immediately get anxious. He made a decision, over analyzing himself won’t help anything. Now he just had to wait for Marinette to respond.

And then he could freak out again.

——————————-

A/N: a work in progress, can someone help me come up with their snap handles? I don’t like the ones I have right now. Adriens is supposed to read as (BeAgreste= be•our•guest). I dunno! I’m not good with puns it’s the best I could do! Please help me!

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cathyparrlyn · 4 years

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The truth behind the politics-notmything drama

TLDR: Charley’s explanation has been proven to be false through clear evidence, her contracting statements with what was found from original authors, and too many coincidental or suspicious points.

There are too many screenshots to all fit in this one post, so we ended up putting only a few on here. For the full post, here is a link to the google doc, you can also read this instead:

As many of you may already know, I have recently made a callout post against Charley (@politics-notmything) for being a plagiarist. She, however, has made an explanation of her side of the story. After lots of careful investigating, I can honestly confirm that Charley is in fact a plagiarist and lied about certain points of the situation.

To start off, I waited to make this post until I was basically 100% sure on whether her explanation was the truth or not. There was much evidence against her. However, a friend of mine decided to check the IP addresses of each of the tumblr blogs she had mentioned (I did not ask them to by the way, they just sent them to me thinking it would help.) They sent me them and it showed that Charley's main account politics-notmything had the same IP address as both the fake wolf1ez account that she claimed to trick her and the fake Nikole account she blamed. I will not, however, be posting her IP address as proof as I personally consider posting that publicly without her consent as doxxing, and I do not wish to harm Charley like that. I never even considered looking at her IP address as I am not comfortable with that nor technologically competent to even remember IP addresses are a thing you can look at. However, I can’t ignore that what my friend showed me is very blatant proof that confirms that Charley has been lying, so I shall mention it, but I refuse to send it to anyone and I have told them to do the same. Please respect that decision.

Some of you may just take my word for it on that. However, for those of you who don’t, here is all the other evidence stacking up against Charley’s story.

First things first, let’s say I didn’t know Charley’s explanation was false. Her explanation was that she plagiarized a friend instead who had plagiarized fics. Charley, in the end, had deceived people and accepted praise from those who were misled to believe that writing was true. Because of that and if her story was true, then she gave a platform to terf (later knowing they were one and continuing to post their work) and her followers had unintentionally supported a terf and plagiarist because of her deception. Now, she may have received credit, but she could've easily said at any point that the fics weren’t actually written by her but by someone else who was anonymous. AO3 even has some features to properly credit others.

The definition of plagiarism is the practice of taking someone else's work or ideas and passing them off as one's own. With this in mind, Charley had plagiarized no matter what, and the fact that she never once told anyone about this co owner and has held conversations with me about how she came up with, wrote, and edited She Used to Be Mine, a plagiarized fic, all by herself is very suspicious.

The proof Charley has been sending is also on invalid sites where you can easily create your own evidence. Everyone already knows and understands the unreliability of google docs with handling fake emails and stuff I presume. As for Snapchat, you can very well change the date. It’s the exact same thing as time traveling in animal crossing, and it’s actually decently known among people. Here is a link to an example of someone altering time on snap chat, followed by the results.

(Results are on the google doc.)

Now some might wonder why would she go through all the trouble of doing that? Well, to create evidence to clear herself. The fact that it was posted quite a bit later, and that she had told people prior to this that she deleted all the messages and proof of information that could blatantly defend herself is very sketchy. Not to mention, the account she @ed as “Nikole” was fake and confirmed to be nonexistent by a friend of mine.

Moreover, the tumblr account that she claimed was Nikoles was recently changed between the two days. When Charley first mentioned the account, me and my friends all investigated it and found a post saying she had another account. However, since then it was altered to say the account Charley @ed and the account had a new bio saying her snap chat is the one Charley @ed. But the account was nonexistent the day before?

Is this simply just a coincidence? Well, let’s see what else is a coincidence.

Charley has recently been writing smut and this blamed blog is an NSFW blog. Coincidence? Maybe. But she also claimed to have cut the person out of her life last year. The blog however is more recently made in late 2020. Why would Charley still be in contact with her accounts? Is this another coincidence? Also, if they did cut things off, why continue to still post her work? And why would two of the fics be things that were made this year if she ended their friendship in 2019? How would she have gotten that from “Nikole” if they were cut off? We even asked the original author of one of the fics about the situation and they confirmed that they gave no permission for someone to copy their fic.

Are these all coincidences too? Not to mention, Charley didn’t say just one person she never mentioned before had tricked her into plagiarism, but two. Charley claimed to be good friends with the author of the original Luck be a Lady and have received permission from them, however, they never spoke to Charley before nor gave permission to anyone to use their fic.

When it was found that the original author of the fic that Luck Be a Lady plagiarized was not friends with Charley nor gave her permission like she had said they did, Charley claimed another account that was fake had tricked her.

Again? How likely is that to even happen once, let alone twice? Or for someone with no post on an account that could have easily been made had even interacted with Charley? Or that the texting style in the evidence she posted is similar to her own and could be edited? And also the conversation itself is way too sketchy and convenient?

(Check google doc or Charley’s post for the conversation.)

Charley also just happened to request help with the title in a group chat l was in with her, but she requested help 3 weeks after the conversation she claims to have happened above.

( @all-my-love-cathy by the way was the one who named it, her name was censored because its her personal account with her name real)

Maybe it's just me, but 3 weeks seems like a bit of a long time to wait to name a fic that already had a storyline and pre-written chapters.

Moreover, the fake Wolf1ez also just so coincidentally happened to recently have copied the Twitter pfp of the account that Charley had seen but not their actual tumblr account? And that this blog that doesn’t make posts decided to tell Charley to use a fic they didn’t write?

How did they even find her blog? And why wouldn’t Charley at least double check the situation here since the person is very suspicious in the conversation they had, had no posts and she doesn’t know them? This is the "close friend" they claimed to have co authored with?

Also, Charley claimed to have commented on the AO3 fic and then deleted it. However, the original author never got an email for this. Whether it’s anonymous or not, they would have seen that a comment was deleted, yet they didn’t have one and all the other comments were fine.

The author even had a note written at latest in January 2020 telling their readers to talk to them on Twitter instead of Tumblr.

Their A/N^

(more screenshots are on the google docs)

Why would she discuss it with them on tumblr then if the author didn’t like tumblr, and Charley does in fact have a Twitter, so why not talk to them there? That’s pretty sketchy.

Also speaking of coincidences, how about the fact that the most recent fic she updated that was confirmed to be plagiarized happened to be the very last fic on the supposed list she claimed to have been given by “Nikole”? Or how she later contradicts herself by saying she won’t upload anymore of her fics? What left did she have to upload if they were all used?

Furthermore, the fic just so happened to also be a Rent fic. Wow, right after Hope Mill Theater released Rent with Millie and Maiya both starring in roles, something Charley had seen and recently expressed great interest in. What a coincidence that it was the one she posted that day. Or how about the other fics that were all copied also being her interests? So many coincidences.

Now I hope it is understood that all of these together just don’t add up. Those are way too many “coincidences” for her explanation to be true. The original authors contacted had never spoken to Charley or given her permission to use their fics, and the accounts she used made no sense with how they were presented. Her explanation feels somewhat of an excuse, and the fact that there is definite proof that she has lied in her explanation and is connected to the accounts is unsettling. Blaming a makeup blog is already messed up, but calling them a terf?

I’m sorry if this post is upsetting to anyone? I know a lot of people have been openly angry or devastated at the news of what has been done. Plagiarism is not okay, neither is deception. To see such a big blog that you might have once admired lie to you and steal from others isn’t easy, especially since she has such a big following that others are dreaming to have. Not to mention, this definitely looks bad for fic writers, especially shippers as she was one of the major faces of Parrlyn. I think it’s important to recognize that we can’t encourage or simply overlook issues like these, nor is it fair to many fans. Please make sure to recognize this issue and become aware about it.

What Charley has done isn’t right, however, that doesn’t deny the fact that she is a human being just like every single one of us. She is very young and did something dumb, but she does not deserve to be sent any hate so please refrain from doing that if you so desired to. I know my blog is known for having issues with her in the past, but I genuinely mean it when I say I hope she learns from this and I don’t want her to be attacked. Nobody deserves to be sent hate, and as a fandom we should strive to be bigger and better people each day and only share positivity and kindness with each other.

Please, once again, give the original fic writers credit if you liked fics that were plagiarized. If you could spare a second to give them a kudos/like and possibly comment something simple like “I love this”, I’m sure it would mean a bunch to them. Hearing your fics were stolen is not easy, speaking from experience here as someone who was also plagiarized this year. They could use a bit of love, so please do consider it if you are comfortable with that.

Once again, I spent the past two days since I read Charley's explanation investigating the situation with a group of people. I just wanted to share the truth, maybe it’s the inner journalist in me. This is what I found with them and what I stand by. Believe what you want, I can’t force ideas onto anyone and I know some are bound to disagree with this, but it’s what I found.

For anyone upset over the incident and needs a place to rant or vent, my dms are open and so is my inbox. If you follow me on insta or are a friend on discord I would recommend those as I am a bit more active there. I’ll try to be on as much as I can the next few days in case anyone needs someone to talk to.

#six the musical #parrlyn #parrleyn #tw discourse #tw politics notmything #tw Charley #tw plagiarism #please be aware of this #callout post #what has been uncovered #a response to Charley’s explanation #thank you to everyone who assisted in the investigation #please remember to be nice everyone #and send the actual authors some love!

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