#nye19

[manonamora-if-reviews]

New Year's Eve, 2019 by Autumn Chen

============= Links

Play the game See other reviews of the game See other games by Autumn or follow @cyberpunklesbian

============= Synopsis

Social gatherings are not your preferred activity. But this one is obligatory, and it threatens to ruin you. You are Karen Zhao, a senior in college who is home for winter break, and seeing your old high school friends for the first time in years. You are not ready, not even close, but perhaps you could make the best of it. Two endings, many paths to arrive there.

============= Other Info

New Year's Eve, 2019 is a Dendry* game, submitted to the 2022 Edition of the SpringThing. This game is a sequel to Pageant (review). *Autumn is also an unofficial maintainer of the Dendry format.

Status: Completed Genre: Dating-sim, Slice-of-life, LGBT

CW: social anxiety, panic attacks, depression, family conflict

============= Playthrough

First Played: June-2022 Last Played: 31-May-2023 Playtime: around 1h (1 full playthrough - 1 half-assed) Rating: 4 /5 Thoughts: A science-type forgets how to human, has a panic attack at a party. May or may not be fine at the end.

============= Review

Jumping a few years into the future of Pageant, Karen Zhao comes back, more anxious than ever, for a short evening, celebrating the turn of a new year*. Stuck in a house out of social obligation, Karen has the option to interact with a cast of familiar faces, go down memory lane, or hide from everyone as best she can to avoid starting a panic attack before the clock strikes twelve. How ever will she cope????? *and what 2020 brings... rolling eyes

Spoilers ahead. It is recommended to play the game first. The review is based on my understanding/reading of the story.

The one thing that I love about Autumn's games is how real the characters and their interactions feel. NYE19 is no different, continuing on the tradition of anxiety-inducing situation and self-deprecating humour bordering on self-loathing. But unlike its predecessor, Pageant, NYE19's tone translated less as slice-of-life-of-a-stressed-teenager-trying-to-make-it-through-the-semester-oh-god-is-she-having-a-panic-attack-again-just-kiss-her-you-dummy and more of this-is-what-a-college-student-forced-to-come-home-for-the-holidays-special-sitcom-epidose-feels-like. From the really awkward meetings with your old high-school friends (or did you date them? or were they crushes?), to the adults hounding you with questions about your future, or your family wanting to uphold a certain image around people. It's a party we've all been to, it's the kind we wish we didn't have to stay...

And Karen, our favourite anxious lesbian, does too. From the start, she warns the player she does not want to be here, really does not find having to engage in small talk (especially with people she's lost touch with), and actually wishes being anywhere but at this party. It is awkward to interact with people you knew (or more than knew) some years prior but with who you have lost contact (life...), finding how they have (not) changed, and how they've been fairing compared to you.

During the span of an evening, you meet (again) Emily, a trans woman (out of the closet then?) who helped you in Pageant to win (kinda) said pageant; Miri, your best-friend, who tagged along for the party because she did not want to be at her family's party* and became the social butterfly you could not be; and Aubrey, your high-school rival, who seems to still be doing just as well with her Harvard education, her Harvard boyfriend**, her probably-perfect-looking Harvard life... You also get to roam around the party daydreaming nihilisticly about the state of the world, hide in the basement to watch a MCU movie and be cringe to your brother, stuff yourself with food*** to temper with your imminent anxiety attack, play some mahjong and lose badly, hide in the bathroom and take selfies sending your into some self-loathing, play some games on your phone****... *the reason is pretty unclear, even with the option of confronting her. **who the fuck brings up the election topic on a New Year's party?!?!?! The gall of that man... ***which of course, I did... ****that one is hella meta, since you can play IF games AND a Pageant-like dating-sim

Whatever you do (especially your interactions), you are constantly reminded of your shortcomings from the past and how you let your anxiety cause the dwindling of your relationships. Your past haunts your every move and your every thoughts, and being in the presence of people from your past makes it all the worse for your mental being.

Half-way through the game, you sit down to have some dinner, forced at the kids-but-not-really-kids table where all your (former?) friends are interacting. It is very awkward, with Aubrey forcing everyone to introduce themselves as if they were having some sort of team-building meeting, her boyfriend forgetting about the No-No-Conversations (Politics-Religions...)... You can choose to participate in the conversation, eat, or listen, but no matter what happens, you will leave the table before the meal/conversation is over, leaving the party as well to go for a walk.

This is where things get interesting. Emily asks whether she can come along, and agreeing or not will give you very different outcomes. The latter will find you wallowing about your loneliness and how devoid of human connections your life is (much due to your own actions), while the former has a more hopeful and levelheaded conversation (leading possibly to a relationship...). With each still, and throughout the whole game, Karen goes on an introspection about the seemingly importance of human interaction, how easy it is to fuck up things, and the transactionality of relationships, all wrapped in a nihilistic and fatalistic bow (everything goes wrong, even if you do the right things).

Even if this sounds all depressing, it strangely is not. I found myself giggle at some passages*. The dry self-deprecating humour is honestly hilarious (especially the Narrator's comments). At any moment, I was expecting a laughing track to cue. Or maybe I was just playing this with a strange mood... * You have committed CRINGE. Kevin may not remember this, but you will. don't worry, game, I will remember...

The game is also very meta about what it is trying to convey. From playing a dating-sim game within an essentially dating-sim game, to the commentary on human interactions being comparable to dating-sims in the optimisation of [emotions/variables] to get the best possible outcome through a sequence of actions we hope is the correct one while we play a dating-sim where the sequence of choices can be optimised to get that "good ending", the story and the gameplay play quite interestingly on each other to get those points across.

Still, unlike other works from Autumn, while I enjoyed myself playing it, it didn't have the same impact on me. I didn't click as much with it as her other games, and felt a bit unsatisfactory? by the end of the playthroughs. The game has some strong moments, especially the part outside of the house, and some funny moments during the roaming around before dinner/before the countdown, but at other moments, it felt hollow. Maybe it is because of your limited agency in the way you interact with others or act, since Karen is an anxious and socially awkward person who has a hard time expressing her feelings and thoughts. Maybe it is because some of the characters you interact with and the way you defined your previous relationships don't feel as fleshed out (Miri and Aubrey comes to mind*, especially compared to Pageant or even Emily). Or maybe it is Karen's blasé look on dwindling and lost relationships that ticked me** that only allows her to have superficial contact with people (aside from Emily). Or maybe it is the more fragmented type of different gameplay/mechanics that didn't work as well as the Storylet format of Pageant***, or the more linear work of GG and the war. Or maybe because the end was a bit too abrupt... *I was wondering if you could choose to have had a relationship with either of those as in Pageant, but you can only with Emily **was it because the game called me out of doing the same as Karen did to some friends from school? Who knows... ***yes, it's bad to compare games that are inherently different...

There is a wonderful sentence from the post-mortem that really encapsulate the vibe of this game, and strangely reminds us of the hope Karen feels just before returning to the party... and this is where I will be ending this review: The past is inescapable, but the future is not entirely determinate.

There is still time...

Some loose points:

Dendry has some really interesting customisations, from the addition of backgrounds to extra assets in form of character portraits, putting the game in a strange text-only choice-based/visual novel limbo.

The conversation bits, especially the dinner between the gals, have such BPH vibes, which is not surprising, since his work is mentioned in the influence for this game. (with the character portraits style and the formatting of the dialogue with the colours (though the grey for Emily was a bit hard to read).

I really liked the inclusion of the Chinese characters in the dialogues in Chinese. This was only included on the first few lines in Pageant (continuing only in italics), but this really helped distinguished better the conversations in English and the ones in Chinese.

As with Pageant, some choices are worded in a way to form a full sentence or complete a thread of thoughts. I liked that.

[hotelhalsey]

iamhalsey: New year, same me. Thank you for helping this little girl grow into more sparkly dresses. Love you. 🥂

[avengerofyourheart]

Reliving the night of a lifetime: singing, dancing, and ringing in the new year in the same room as a Chris Evans. I’m not gonna get over this. “Let us live forever tonight.” @chrisevans @themidnightofficial #ChrisEvans #nye @drinkhighwest #parkcity #nye19 #dreamscometrue https://www.instagram.com/p/BsG4TwBD-3q/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1928qf2df3jqq

[troweltime]

hey! I'm curious to know, what are the five things you were most proud of/were important to you that happened in 2018 and what are five things you're looking forward to in 2019?

thank you!!

5 things that happened in 2018.

graduated high school on honour roll despite mental health issues.

figured out what i’m actually interested in persuing (even though it took a term of post secondary to figure it out).

started learning michif

moved back out west from northern ontario.

got my baba’s pyrohy recipe.

5 things i’m looking forward to on 2019.

turning 19 (i’ll be legal!).

starting my associates of pre social work in the fall.

getting more involved in the local métis community, and the urban indigenous community here as a whole.

confining to improve my michif.

hopefully getting a summer job in my field.

[spacetracks]

NASA’s OSIRIS-REx spacecraft will enter orbit of #Asteroid #Bennu on #NYE19 achieving 2 new records!!! “the smallest body ever orbited by a spacecraft and the closest orbit of a planetary body by any spacecraft” - asteroidmission.org

[sosick0fplaying]

This NYE #erock brings you the black tie affair at a brand new spot in jersey city called @atelierballroomnj music by @deejayurb @mezonation and @autremo we’ve been bringing you the biggest nye party for years this won’t be different link for tickets is in bio any vip reservations pls text 973.647.9257 4 hour open bar tickets #nye #newyearseve #jerseycity #blacktieaffair #nye2019 #nye19 #vip #newspot #northjersey (at Atelier Ballroom) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bqsx2uUlL8j/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=41dnsjvgojsv

[maldithalangako]

Happy New Year 2020 🍾 #cheers2020 #blessed #nye19 https://www.instagram.com/p/B6vk7__n9O9/?igshid=enxxghbqmki2

[kyandkey]

An independent bottling that sits very comfortably at number two. Distilled and matured at Clynelish and bottled by Signatory this is truly a magnificent sherry bomb. Ginger spice and raisin sweetness combine well on the nose while the palate is full caramel chocolate, ginger and passing peat notes. All this bottled at cask strength! . . . #clynelish #topwhisky #nye2019 #whiskyclub #nye19 #instabourbon #rum #lovescotch #drinks #instamalt #whisky #maltwhisky #maltwhiskey #vodka #cigar #whiskylovers #singlemaltwhiskey #drinkstagram #drinkporn #gin #drinksporn #whiskynight (at Auckland, New Zealand) https://www.instagram.com/p/B6uCy50HA-q/?igshid=6zjdw3a4bzgs

[romiasboutique]

Need the perfect Statement Earrings to match your #NYE dress? Shop link in the bio for our Shake the Party Statement Earrings available online @romiasboutique #nye19 #nyedress #nyeparty #nyevents #nyecelebration #statementaccessories #romiasboutique https://www.instagram.com/p/B6liKWFB-Te/?igshid=1h25cb8s9n8py

[happyzyx]

blue rose 🌟 do not edit.

[hotelhalsey]

Halsey - Without Me (Live From Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve 2019)

[whiskeygin23]

Burj Khalifa laser show by Cacasilo

[nbcahalloffame]

Happy New Year everyone! 🎉 • • • #nye #newyear #newyears #newyearseve #nye2019 #nye19 #thankyou #halloffame #hof #nbcahof #thanks #resolutions (at National Black College Alumni Hall of Fame Foundation, Inc.) https://www.instagram.com/p/BsI7KJulVFE/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=c6mvfvbgktoq

[rosesbynotes]

24, 69, 74, 100

24. Is there someone you wish you could fix things with? 

Yes there is. 

69. Picture of yourself?

I’m the one on the left <<<< #friends #NYE19/20

74. When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other? 

Now that I think about it, it has been me more than the other way around lol 

100. Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with? 

Yes. 

Thanks for asking Anon! 

[paperfacesllc]

Happy New Year!!! Thanks to @officialnicholegalicia for the 📸 Fantastic Party @udophotography . . . #celebritystylisttyronmayes #superstylisttyronmayes #superstylist #tyronmayes #stylist #newyorkstylist #fashion #celebritystylist #ootd #wardrobestylist #paperfaces #beautiful #bestoftheday #influencer #blackcelebritystylist #newyorkcity #nye19 #nye2019 #happynewyear2020 (at Loft 29) https://www.instagram.com/p/B6xXDKNB9Zx/?igshid=7rr4u6sc8m95

[puckypuff]

Hi there #NYE19 #Puckypuff #Hola #Color #Me https://www.instagram.com/p/BsFexNOAC5o/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=h7ckiu7fontg