#ofc she wasnt a good mother but she was sick and she never got the help she needed bcs frank was always there

[literaturebf]

this has already been said about a thousand times before but i think the showrunners and writers are evil for making monica out to be this huge big bad villain for abandoning her kids as if frank didn't do the exact same fucking thing. as if frank didn't do worse every single time he showed up in that place if he bothered showing up at all. LIKE HELLO

[sorin-in-the-sixth-sense]

A list of my favourite fictional grey characters (not in order) SPOILER ALERT!

Regina Mills (Once Upon A Time)

There is a reason why Regina is called «The Evil Queen» She was pure evil. A murderer, a kidnapper, a rapist, how could I like her? Well it wasnt before season 3 I started to like her. It took a lot of time. And I suppose I will never fully love her after she raped Graham for...years... and murdered people - children when she was a tiny bit frustrated. I would even say that she is irredeemable. And I thought her redemtion arc was unrealistic in the beginning, and for God’s sake, she should not have been crowned The Good Queen in season 7. But she tried to change so hard for Henry, she tried to redeem herself. Tried to be a good mother for a change. She saved multiple lives and souls. She didnt completely redeem herself, I must admit it. But she tried so hard and I feel like she deserves something from that. She eventually became a very good mother, even though it was a little late since Henry was already 12 when she became one. She was still a bitter bitch and blamed innocent people for unfortunate things that happened to her (Zelena, Mary Margaret, Emma) but by season 7, she became something more than that. She became half good. Grey. And even though she didnt completely redeem herself, she came close. Also, I love her sassy personality, she should be crowned The Sassy Queen, not The Good Queen.

Rumplestiltskin (Once Upon A Time)

The Dark One who after 7 seasons became one of the greatest heroes in OUAT. The man who was known as the village coward because he ran away from the Ogre War and was too afraid to fight for his wife became one of the bravest men. Like Regina, he was a murderer. He was super manipulative with all his deals and the «all magic comes with a price, dearie» thing. He manipulated people into getting themselves killed. Before he became The Dark One, he was a good man with a pure heart. But the power of the dagger took over him and his heart was all black. He was power sick. He always wanted power, but not for selfish reasons. He felt like he needed power to protect his son Bealfire/Neal and his wife Milah, but when he took that power, the darkness came over him and he, after time, became evil. It wasn’t before he met Belle French his heart showed a little bit of light. As he said, she was his light in an ocean of darkness. Their relationship was problematic and selfish in the beginning. He manipulated her into thinking he changed (which you know i detest *cough* James Potter) Rumple loved power more than he loved her, at least in season 4. He too often chose it over her, until season 6 when he started to properly redeem himself. His redemtion arc took over 300 years but it came in the end. His love for her changed A LOT. In the other seasons, his love was unhealthy and selfish. But in season 6 and 7, he changed a lot. This time it wasnt only for Belle, but Gideon too. They helped him let go of power and in season 7, he tried so hard to get rid of the dagger and the power so that he could live a normal life with his family. And after Belle died, he didn’t return to the dagger or the dark side. He helped the good side to defeat Drizella and the other villians in that season. He even became a father figure to Alice. And in the end he sacrificed himself to save Killian’s (Nook) life. And he got reunited with Belle. He is the most interesting character in OUAT, no doubt there.

Sawyer/James Ford (LOST)

Sawyer is without a doubt one of my fave characters from LOST (after Charlie and John) in his background, he was a thief and manipulated woman to believe he loved them, just to take all their money. (Maybe except Cassidy, since he fell in love with her later, but he still manipulated her AND got her pregnant) He’s a real asshole. Buuut - then he became an entirely different (and better) man. He meets Kate Austen and I feel like his love for her changes his character. In the beginning he was a bit of a perve with her (i mean, walking straight towards her completely naked...) he doesnt develope much in the 1 season, but later (beginning in the 3 season) he becomes quite selfless and protective. In season (was it 4? I dont quite remember) he falls in love again with Juliet Burke, and heeeeell, she was good for him. He also developes a nice relationship with Claire Littleton (platonic) he becomes protective of her. He attemts to comfort Hurley after Charlie’s death. In the rest of the seasons he is the born leader. He puts the team before himself (like when he sacrificed his chance to escape the Island) and in the paralell universe he is absolutely the best.

Heathcliff (Wuthering Heights)

Okay, no he’s not exactly a grey character since he’s a lot more dark than light, but I love him too much to not put him here. Differently from the other character I’ve mentioned above, Heathcliff doesnt have a redemtion. He died an awful person. He abused and manipulated a lot of people. Before he became this asshole, he was a much better person. He was an ass to those who deserved it (Hindley, That bitch deserved to die so young. Edward was a kind man, but I don’t like him, sooo... nevermind) The way he treated Isabella was sickening and awful, she had every right to leave him and take Linton away and hate him. I Don’t like Isabella, but she never deserved to be treated that way. His love for Cathy was unhealthy, but it was true and he would do so much for her. (They kinda remind me of Snily, so ofc I ship it) Heathcliff went through so much trauma in his life and never recovered. After Cathy died, he was practically dead too, then he killed himself years later. His life made me cry for days, especially the ending. He is such an interesting character with so many layers.

Ulrich Nielsen (Dark)

(Before I say anything, I haven’t finished the entire show yet, so this is gonna be short and probably not 100% correct)

To be honest, I don’t like Ulrich at all as a person. I look at him and I see a fully grown up man with no remorse for what he did to Regina as a teen. He cheated on his wife with a woman he didnt even love. He tried to murder a CHILD who hadnt done anything wrong (yet) because he thought he was going to kill his brother and son in the future (okay, i get why he did it. He was desperate to get Mikkel back and the whole time-tarvelig thing was extremely stressfull) BUT HE COULD HAVE DONE SOMETHING A LOT LESS HARMFULL TO PREVENT EVERYTHING TO HAPPEN. Despite this, i love him as a character. He is so interesting and there are times were I have to remind myself why i dont like him. He is brave and intelligent and... so fucking hot as a teen.

Hannah Kahnwald (Dark)

(Again, havent watched the whole show yet)

This girl is MESSED UP. When she was fourteen, she accused Ulrich of being a rapist, which is a very serious accusation and then blamed it on Regina who she knew was a victim of Ulrich and Katharina’s bullying. She is a home-wrecker, and when Katharina found out about Ulrich cheating on her with Hannah and confronted her, Hannah blamed it on Ulrich and said he pressed her and that she wanted it to end, but he refused or whatever, i dont 100% remember the conversation. But she was also a very good mother to Jonas and she was so sweet to Mikkel/Michael. She is a bitch, so much that its impossible to not like her.

Severus Snape (Harry Potter)

Saved the best one to last. The guy my whole account is about, ofc he’s on this list, and ofc this is gonna be the longest text.

This guy is a complete asshole. Always has been, always will be. He bullied Harry and Co (mostly Harry and Neville) he was a bitter and sarcastic bitch. He used to be a follower of Voldemort. Even in his youth he had a lot of flaws. We all know he became the bastard he was due to childhood trauma, mental illnesses and manipulation. I believe he had depression, grief and PTSD. At least in his 20’s he was suicidal, and I believe it remained like that til the day he died, because he had no one to help him or give him support. He turned to the dark side in an attemt to make his life better (as many members of gangs do) but he only stayed like that for two years, which is extremely impressive if you know what kind of person Voldemort is. As a 21 year old, Snape was a very different person from what he was as a 38 year old. If he was the way he was as a 38 yr old when Lily, James and Harry was in danger. First of all, he wouldnt start to try to save Lily by asking Voldemort, he would have went straight to Dumbledore, probably with his own brilliant plan on how to save them. Second, he wouldnt hesitate for a second to save James and Harry to. In canon, he needed to have a personal reason to save them, which was Lily’s feelings I believe. As a 38 yr old, he risked his life to save people he hated (Lupin) This is a great character developement. He went from being a selfish bitch, to become a selfless asshole. He was that kind of person who did anything in his power to protect someone, even if that person had nothing to do with winning the war and had nothing to gain himself.

[cybernightwanderer]

Asking help from my mother in anything goes like this : ( Also social security in Portugal are the new “ Loan Sharks ?“ )

So our goverment is doing a witch hunt on people who took medical leaves this year. I took 1 month and a half of medical leave because i suddently stopped walking, and the recovery was , and still is a mess, and i still havent had treatment because it got canceled due to Codv, i literally just have pain killers, that im allergic to half. But nonetheless i got back to work ( as you know from previous posts i am a cook) , after 2 months on in and out. I went to the medical avaluation first month and they said it was not justified for me to be on medical leave, so they cut it. Blah blah i went to work early, started having even more problems, started not being able to walk again and so on. Basicly very complicated fight with the social security deparment. Because they kept saying i was lying and that i was good to work. Even tho i went to the hospital a few times, sick of the medication or because i couldnt walk again. And mostly because i could even barely stand while working even with 8 pain killers that they gave me. Few months in April they told me to send ALL the medical documents. And the funny thing is, the medical documents are a fucking joke, for example i was taken to the hospital because i couldnt walk, and was in excrucial pain, yet somehow the ER doctors noted that “ i was ok , not in  great pain “ , yet i was literally paralized in my leggs from the pain, and crying in pain non stop everytime someone moved me the slightest. Moving forward. they thanked me for sending all the documents and said they would let me know. Ok so they sent me a new letter this week threatning me , to send new documents because they werent enough. That the documents i sent didnt justify ENOUGH. I mean....it had back exams, legg exams, medical treatments that went consistently wrong, the hospital documents regarding my ambulance , and my ER trips ( NOT ONE TRIP , BUT MULTIPLE ), my doctors document saying i had starters of another back hernia, and my legg liggaments were inflated and damaged. I mean, THATS NOT ENOUGH? ok So i kindly sent an email asking, what was missing. So now i have to ask my doctor to make a timeline detailed document regarding the situation. But for no reason because the Social Security will and just wants to force me to pay it all back, probably because they r short on money in this lay off season , i dont know. And me being the socialy anxious and panicking over this situation i asked my mom to call our family doctor to write a new report because his was a little BLANT apparently. Even tho at the time i asked him to make it very detailed, yet my mom kept yelling at me to shut up and not to waste the doctors time and because it made no sense to make a detailed report. However maybe now she clearly sees that was not the case and that i was right that time. So yesteday she said she would call this morning, ok all good. I woke up , she called me over to the living room, and the conversation went like: Mom calls me over tells me its abou the doctor call. Me - So you called the doctor? Mom - No, you have to ask the doctor for medicine or complain about your back or something, you cant show up just asking for a document. Me - No, why would i ask medicine if i dont need, and he is our family doctor i can just---- interrupted me with an loud and agressive tone. Mom - you cant do that the doctor wont see you , thats wasting his time, thats not how you do things blah blah blah. ( i mean he is a family doctor, and this is just as important as medicine?? im being scammed and harrassed by Social Security?!! ) Me - No you say that you need medicine to the entry registration not the doctor, you have to be honest to the doctor, and its a social security matter, he will know its important, legal shit is important. - she interrupts me again but yelling this time.

And i straight up say : Stop being stupid. And she starts threatning me and blah blah blah. And tells me she wont call the doctor, and refused to help me. So i sayd “ ok “ and went to my room. First of all, its only the third time in my life that i ever call a name to my mom or “offend” her in any sort of way. The names i called my mom were : a monster ( one or two times loudly, but i do call her always in my mind, she beat me up or called me a piece of shit ) And the other it wasnt a name , i just told her i hated her. My mom, my whole living life as called me the fallowing multiple times across the years, some daily , some monthly : A Bitch. An ungratefull piece of shit. A piece of shit ( Also most used one ) Yelling in my face agressivly saying “ YOU ARE SHIT” ( never forgot this one , she did it for a whole month ) Dumb ( this is her most used one, specially when i was just a little child lol ) A lazy fuck ( when  i started having depression and during my depression episodes , such as not being able to get out of bed and stuff ) Irresponsable ( because i dont have a second job, even tho i work 12 hours daily and leave home at 7 am and get back at 2/3 am ) Uselesss ( many many times ) And ofc many sub versions of these ones for specific ocasions. And i have been hearing these since i was in my 3/4 grade LOL, basicly a baby child. And now for the past hour has entered my room acting like a VICTIM, like shes an actual victim of abuse LOL  And now is asking if i called the doctor. BITCH I CANT CALL THE DOCTOR, my fucking crippling anxiety doesnt let me, thats why i asked you. FFS

So now im stuck, i need to call the doctor, but i cant... so im just panicking.... 

[cybernightwanderer]

“ My Reiki and Yoga New Free Soul Brother - Once an abuser manipulative thieve , money driven leach “

Well thats a big tittle to describe one person entirely. So my ( midle ) brother across my kid years and then teenager developing to adult, my brother was an interesting person. For example, in school my brother would pretend he didnt know me , and if i even dared to aproach him he would shame me in front of everyone, even thought they already knew i was his sister, i was bullied a lot in school so at the start i tried a few times reaching out to him , specially because i didnt have any friends and id always be alone. This motherfucker who was already a teenager completly dismissed me , BUT would actually seek me out or talk to me when he needed lunch money because he already “ spent his”, funny enough hed get mine to eat coz he didnt wanna use his, and if i didnt gave him even though i hadnt eaten , he would guilty me badly , and being the kid that i was , my brother was everything to me , even tho he didnt gave a shit about me.

So in consequence i started drawing a distance line between me and him, at home id start to distance myself and ignore him. And he started getting like a really attention whore, hed always annoye me , and force me to hangout, and i didnt he would threaten me or do some shit at the house and blame me for it , because my mother at the tinniest shit at home would beat the crap out of me , so me being the little kid that i was tired of getting beatings for no random reason , id play along. My brother would literally antagonzie me and scare the shit out of me while so. Everytime my family went anywhere , for example the beach, id try to go to the water alone for some peace this motherfucker would sneak behind me and try to drown me as a joke , like every 5 minutes, id yell in panic and my mom wouldnt do shit, eventually id end up actually chocking on water and  hit my head on the sand and cry the rest of the time. So yeah FUN ! Did my mom do anything ? ofc no , “ hes just playing around “. I had BD collections that id buy with my lunch money that sometimes id save up, disney movie cassettes and so on. Sometimes id have snacks in my room to eat when studying or something. My brother, being a full grown ass teenager that he was , would steal everything without me even catching a glimpse of it. My brother would “ borrow “ things without asking then hide them because he wanted. I had two final fantasy collectible caracters that i spent my leftover bday money on, and my brother would take it as his own. Yes because whatever birthday money i got wether it be 50 euros or even 20 from my grandma or aunt, my mom would take it “ borrowed” for herself with no justification, shed always say “ Ah lend me i need it  / or / I always buy you clothes and everythings, i buy you food , you owe me this , thats the minimum you could do / “ or / she would just take it without me knowing , she would inspect my bday gifts and take it before hand , the problem is that my grandma or aunt would always after if i was gonna save it up and id ask what and they would question what i did with the money and i would ask what money and blah blah , you get where this is going.

OH and if i didnt give my money the money she would beat me up ! wich is funny asf. My brother literally sold all my things behind my back, my original BDS, MY FUCKING POISON IVY STORYLINE BD, my disney cassetes , my collectibles, and my snacks he would steal and eat. If i had saved up money hidden, first he would try to borrow it and guilty me with the “ im such a good brother to you , you cant even lend me money ? i will pay you back, trust me “ ... ofc he never payed me back , but every two weeks he woul do this shit. And if i by any chance didnt gave him , hed just steal, or sell my things, wich regardless of me lending him , he would do it anyway. Fast forward to my early teenage years, i had to start working , i quit school because we entered that internet deth with my moms company, wich my brother also contributed to but let the blame to me ofc, i was already the punch bag of the family what is one more thing. My brothers were always my moms “ babies “ even tho one was already a full grown ass man and the other was already on his way. My brother did nothing at home , didnt take the dog outside, didnt take out the trash, didnt make food, didnt wash the dishes, didnt clean the house, basicly sit on his ass all day playing video games and eating, and selling my shit for money. My brother was unemployed for 3/4 years in between those i studied and worked at the same time , and did all the house chores, even if i had to walk the dog as 2/3 am after work i would have to, even tho my brother was in bed all day. My mom would literally yell at me and make my life a living hell and threaten to hit me if i didnt do it or even dared to complain. I would get home trying to study , trying to recorver at school ,and she would yell non stop until i didn every house chore, wich i would only manage to finish at midnight or later, and then id be too tired and unmotivated to do anything so id just sleep, and id always get late to class thanks to that. When my brothers started working, it was at my dads wearehouse, where i was forced to work too. Id work 8 to 10 hours , sometimes more, because we got payed by publicity stock packs, each pack was worth 1 euro, wich also 1 pack took 1 hour and 15/20 minutes to make. So if i wanted to make the day worth anything i had to rush , no eating breaks or pee breakes. My hands at the end of the day would literally be filled with newspaper and printed paper ink and dirk, and tons of cuts and sores , that would be leeched in paper ink, wich make it hurt even more at the end of the day, and was really hard to take it out. My brother would take breaks every 30 minutes to smoke , be on his phone or even go to bathroom or eat randomly, i wouldnt stop the 8 hours straight, and when i actually had to go to the bathroom or eat something because id get sick, my brother literally stole packs from me, or try to “ negociate my help for X “, the thing about my brother is that hed always try to negociate something , ofc it was always entangled for his own benefit and not both.

So it was like this my brother came up to me all excited and say “ oh if you do this to help me , ill split the profit that way we will make more and will be less exausting “ stupid like i was id always give in, specially because if i didnt  hed steal anyway.... Hed always change his methods and works, and guilty me if i didnt do it, so id always have to do so. If i didnt hed just change the pack registration list either way, without me even seeing it, and fake my signature, i only found out we had to sign an official paper a few months later when my dad asked, before that my brother would always tell me to note them on my phone then send the numbers by the end of the week, and since he was the bosses son , every one backed up that story ofc.  Eventually when i started to get older , i cut ties with my brothers and dad. And my ( midle ) brother was constantly trying to reach out and play nice and shit , also he was still working at the wearhouse . Anyway , fast forward when i got unemployed after the 5 star hotel due to rape attent and shit like that, i was unemplyoyed for 4 moths?! My brother tried to reach out , and even came home before my mother to try and persuade me to enter one of his schemes, i explained to my brother that i didnt have any money and that i wouldnt believe anymore of his stupid schemes and blah blah. He swore he was only trying to make up to me , and the plan was , i would pretend to work at my dads  wearehouse, but i would just be there 2 times a week and he would give me a cut of the protfit, coz if he didnt want my dad to hire some random slow guy, so he set up to do a two persons work, and give me 30 % of the monthy rate and all i had to do is show up a few times for my dad to see i was there, and then go home. That motherfucker insisted for 3 days straight promissing it wasnt a scheme and that he was serious this time. OBVIOUSLY THAT DIDNT HAPPEN OBVIOUSLY- with the last 10 euros i had, i bought train tickers to the wearhouse, the first week he actually stick to his word, a few days later the shit started, he actualy forced me to deliver shit and stuff. Wich for me was really difficult because its when i started to develop hernias, and the pain was too overwhealming, and that fucker didnt care and still forced me to, eventually i told him i was out , and found out he still used my name in his shit plan  and pretended i was still working there to my dad for two whole months , and then begged me to lie to my dad on the phone, hed literally call me before my dad trying to get me to lie, and promissing the money, and hed ask my mom to pressure my to help him. What could i do??!! what happend after you may ask? did my brother gave me the money? OFC NO ! NO! He gave me 115 euros of the cut , and he made 996 euros to himself. And told me it was only for the days “ i actually worked “  NEVER IN MY LIFE  I VERBALLY EVER SAID TO ANYONE , FAMILY OR NOT  “ I hope you die, you are shit , you are nothing to me , seriously i hope you die “ and acually meant it and wished it. For the first time in my life i actually wished so hard for my brother to just die. I was done, i was officialy done , i had never been so done with someone. I was officialy done with my family. I blocked my dad on everything, i told my dad to fuck off. I told my older brother to fuck off. I told my middle brother to go die. And the last person was my dying grandma who was a snob ass piece of shit who only gave a shit about me when i was a little girl ( because its only cute when they r kids  ), to stop trying to call me and told her to just go and die. She literally sent me a voice message of 5 minutes crying beggin me to see her, and i just told her to go and die, its not because she is dying that is gonna erase the fact that she didnt gave a shit about me after i actually grown. And the fact that i did this apparently scared the shit out my dad and brothes, specially because i did it so naturally. AND TO THIS DAY I DONT REGRET WHAT I SAID AND I STILL DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT HER. OH AND PLOT TWIST SHES NOT DEAD NOR WAS SHE DYING, LAST YEAR SHE TRIED TO SCHEME MONEY OUT OF MY MOM, AND BEFORE THAT SHE WOULD ALWAYS TREAT MY MOM LIKE SHIT AN CALL HER NAMES, FUNNY ! Now they try to sneak into my life really AGAIN ... ffs Since the end of last year, apparently my brother turned into reiki and yoga and shit and is now driving a motivational fuck page for people who wanna “ grow spiritually and open the third eye “ and is trying to reconnect with me again, obviously i cut him off before he could even talk to me. So he spent 3 months or so , coming here and trying, and since he didnt get anything since january and february hes trying to manipulate me behind my mother, my mother is venting to my brother about me being closed off to them , and my brother is DIAGNOSING ME AS A PROBLEM, BECAUSE HE IS SO WISE AND ENLIGHTED... WTF??? diagnosing me??? ur not a fucking therapist you asshole ! The other day i heard him tell my mother in the living room , that “ SHE CANT LIVE LIKE THIS ITS VERY TOXIC FOR HER, SHE HAS TO TALK TO YOU AND BE A BETTER SISTER AND DAUGHTER SHE NEEDS TO BLAH BLAH YOU NEED TO KICK HER OUT IF SHE IS LIVING OFF YOU  “ WHAT THE FUCK?? im living off my mother?? the woman that forced me to give her more than half of my paycheck, thats doesnt give me privacy or respect and that literally threatned me if i ever tried to leave that she would chase me down???????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OR SEND ME TO A MENTAL HOSPITAL????!!!! ... My older brother is doing the same, keeps trying to get me to go visit his kid, and to meet his kid, keeps trying to get my mother to see pictures of the kid or to call them. They keep trying to guilty me “ oh you cant take it out on the kid, its not the kids fault , he needs to know his aunt, you are his family “ BITCH FAMILY?????? FAMILY??? family doesnt mean shit. Yesterday even sent photos of his kid trought a new number LOL. I actually did went to the kids birthday, first time a few months ago, and guess what , my brother still the NO ONE ASKED- OPINIONATED asshole he was about my whole life, he literally takes one glimpse of me and judges my whole life and starts yelling shit at me ...ofc thats not gonna happend again. People dont change. People. dont. change. PEOPLE DONT CHANGE ! BITCH ?? WHAT? WHO THE FCK?? HOW THE FUCK??? In conclusion my brother is still the same piece of shit he was , and now even more narcisistic, and manipulative, he cant get what he wants from me , so now hes resourting to my mother again. I NEED TO LEAVE THIS HOUSE, I NEED TO LEAVE THIS FAMILY OMFG. Funny enough he does this shit then tries to get me to go to his house to celebrate his birthday because he “ MISSES ME AND THE OLD DAYS” ???? OLD DAYS OF YOU MENTALY ABUSING ME ? NOT TO MENTION THAT YOU ALMOST BROKE MY ARM BECAUSE I WOULDNT LEND YOU MY COMPUTER 3 YEARS AGO????? my mom literally told him we were gonna go there without even asking me if i wanted or even if i was gonna go. LOL, shes trying to emotionally manipulate me with older pictures of me and him , and games we would play together LOL. OMFG PLEASE SOME ONE, I DONT EVEN KNOW I NEED TO DIE OMFG... I CANT TAKE THIS FAMILY ANYMORE.