#oh and I’m from Brazil

[shiraru]

I’ve been hitting my ocs with the Disney channelfication ray on Twitter lately

[spacebell]

I have a call about a job opening (not really an interview from what I understand) in 30 minutes and I’m feeling my anxiety acting up in the form of tummy issues

[nonasuch]

IT IS TIME: Miss Universe National Costume 2023

it's here! the Met Gala for people who actually understand what camp is!

yes I'm like 3 months late, but I sat down and watched the damn thing. I put up with the horrible little rhyming couplets for each contestant so you don't have to. and without further ado:

Albania: Starting off very Victoria’s Secret this year! Apparently it’s gold for important symbolism reasons, not just because everything in this competition is blinged out to within an inch of its life. The wings do look nice in motion!

Angola has a good balance of bling, actual cultural dress, and oh hey it has surprise bonus art on the back! That will be a theme this year.

Argentina: Why is there a guy in a hat right down at the bottom edge of her cape. He looks like he’s staring at her butt. How does this represent their flag.

Aruba: This is fine. I like the coral. She thinks climate change is bad. Her parrot is clearly way too heavy to hold up and it wobbles like crazy in motion.

Australia: This is now multiple years in a row that Australia has just worn a fucking prom dress. It’s got native wildflowers on. You could have made this exact same dress with a Great Barrier Reef theme and I would have liked it 80% more.

Bahamas: This costume is allegedly based on a 19th-century doll from the Bahamas “world famous straw market,” which is already bullshit; I googled “bahamas straw market antique doll” and like. they both have big skirts? I guess? Anyway now I’m too distracted by the way she has a hoop skirt awkwardly jammed under there and hiked up on one side. Minus ten for poor construction.

Bahrain's theme is “Bahrain’s pearl heritage,” which like. I guess? The headdress and yoke are pretty. Put more pearls on the actual outfit. Kudos for getting to wear pants.

Belgium: Girl. No. Why is your theme “Latin dance” and why are you wearing a spangly cocktail dress with a totally unrelated piece of fabric fluttering behind it? (Apparently the fabric was designed by a member of Belgium’s royal family? Who is a fashion designer? This is what nepotism gets you.)

Bolivia saw Aruba’s parrot and was like, I can do that better. And she was right! It’s way less wobbly and the costume as a whole does work better. Also made from recycled materials, so we’ll see if that’s a theme again this year. The back of the cape is nice too.

Sadly, Bolivia's parrot supremacy was short-lived, because Brazil was like, bitch please. I see your sad little parrots and raise you FOUR giant parrots, and also the shoulder parrots are articulated and can turn their heads back and forth. I think Brazil wins the parrot competition that only she knew she was in.

[sunrizef1]

big reputation

Pairing: Logan Sargeant x reader, Max Verstappen x ex!reader

Warnings: cheating, lying, manipulation

Authors note: kinda hate this but whatever

Pt2 Pt3

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1 kellypiquet and 6,889,007 others

yourusername happy 5 years with this wonderful, talented, beautiful, amazing man. I’m so proud of everything you do and you manage to amaze me every single day. Thank you so much for showing me what true love can be and for sticking beside me every day. From the boats of Monaco to the villas of Spain to the beaches of Brazil, I love you forever my darling xx

Tagged: maxverstappen1

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user1 my parents <3

user2 I want what they have

user3 if she’s not like this I don’t want her

user4 the roses 🥹

user5 the love and support they have for each other is so amazing

user6 the way she’s almost never missed a race 😭🫶

maxverstappen1 ❤️❤️❤️

yourusername ❤️❤️❤️

user7 they’re so in love I can’t

user8 sleeping on the highway tonight

charles_leclerc Happy Anniversary!! 🥳

yourusername thank you Charles! xx

user9 the real royal couple

user10 when is max going to propose lmao

user11 they seem so happy together aw

carlossainz félicitations! 🎊🍾🎉

yourusername thank you chili!

user12 🥰🥰🥰

user13 that caption is so adorable

user14 we need new music about this man pls queen

user15 I feel a love album coming on

logansargeant 🎉

liked by yourusername

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yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1 kellypiquet and 3,898,001 others

yourusername Friendship that will last forever <33 xx It was great to see you love @/kellypiquet

Tagged: kellypiquet

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user14 love this friendship

user15 got here before max did… proud of myself

user16 two pretty best friends

user17 their friendship is so pure I love them 😭

user18 the way y/n is so intertwined into f1 despite being from a completely different profession is so special to me 🫶

kellypiquet 🫶

yourusername 🫶

user19 oh to be y/n l/n

user20 new music when????

user21 why is Logan lurking lmao

user22 that is an international pop-star from his state… she has 122 million followers… she’s often on the grid… I don’t think this rly needs an explanation.

user21 I just think it’s weird cuz he’s not rly friends with max but he still knows him. Kinda weird to be lurking on the page of an acquaintances girlfriend.

user22 Dude she has 15 Grammys… she’s not a secret

user23 lowk the piquets are problematic but yall don’t wanna hear about that

user24 I’m just glad y/n is happy tbh

TWITTER

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yourusername has added to their story

user41

🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

user42

what a lie lmao 😵‍💫

user43

Justice for max

user44

I love you y/n!!! 🫶

user45

🖕🖕🖕🖕

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yourusername

liked by logansargeant taylorswift and 12,009,887 others

yourusername every days a new day ☀️

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user25 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

user26 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

user27 🐍🐍🐍🐍

user28 we still love you y/n 🫶

user29 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

user30 we believe you ❤️

user31 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

user32 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

user33 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

user34 we know you're not lying ❤️ it's gonna be okay 🫶

user35 she's a lying snake 🐍🐍🐍

user34 she said the call was doctored and I believe her

user36 it sounds pretty real to me 🐍🐍🐍

user34 I know she wouldn't do that. She loved max too much. She's proven time and time again to be a genuine, kind person and until the full call has been released, I'm going to believe her.

user37 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

user38 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

user39 max not defending her proves it's true 🐍🐍🐍 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

user40 Logan liking… guess he's siding with the liar then 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

COMMENTS HAVE BEEN LIMITED FOR THIS ACCOUNT

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maxverstappen1

liked by charles_leclerc kellypiquet and 6,009,887 others

maxverstappen1 healing.

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user46 😍😍😍

user47 I'm so glad max is able to heal after what y/n did

user48 thank god that snake is gone 🐍

user49 kelly being there for max is so sweet

user50 I'm so happy they stayed friends 😭

charles_leclerc good times bro 🫶

maxverstappen1 😅

user51 😵😵😵

user52 y/n didn't do anything

user53 better off without y*n 😵‍💫

used54 I never liked y/n l/n lmao she's always been annoying

logansargeant 👍

liked by maxverstappen

user55 I'm just so happy kelly and max have each other and they weren't torn apart by y/n cheating

user56 you guys are so annoying that call is obviously fake

user57 she literally admits to in the recording what are you talking about

user56 the things she says in it are so vague she could literally be talking about anything. And we don't even hear the other persons responses. They could've 100% been prompting her to say this. Why would they cut them out if they wanted to prove they were telling the truth.

user57 🐍🐍🐍

TWITTER

7 MONTHS LATER… NO SIGHT OF Y/N

INSTAGRAM

logansargeant has added to their story

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maxverstappen1

liked by kellypiquet redbullracing and 2,008,990 others

maxverstappen1 Ready for Imola! 👊

tagged: kellypiquet

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user58 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

user59 we all heard the call

user60 lied for what

user61 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

user62 y/n deserves an apology

user63 we 🫶 max and kelly

user64 nah, speak for yourself 🐍

user65 ruined your girlfriends life for a full year just so you could date her best friend... And for what??? Why did you decide you needed to ruin her career and her life just for the sake of a relationship

user66 don't listen to these idiots, y/n deserves what you did

user67 I understand why they did it tbh, y/n is so annoying

user68 🐍🐍🐍

COMMENTS HAVE BEEN LIMITED FOR THIS ACCOUNT

yourusername

liked by logansargeant lilyhme and 21,998,879 others

yourusername all I think about is karma

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user69 COMMENTS ARE BACK ON

user70 MY QUEEN Y/N

user71 🐍🐍🐍

user72 now why did Charles like this post… my man literally defended max last year when this happened 😭

user73 the only drivers I’d accept to be a part of this is Carlos, Lewis and Logan. The only ones who defended her the whole time.

user74 and Fernando!!!

carlossainz mi hermana! El mundo te extrano 😁

yourusername gracias carlito, Aunque no creo que me hayan extrañado 😅

carlossainz Te extrañé, entonces 🤣

Translation: (my sister! The world missed you) (Thank you carlito, though I don’t think the world missed me) (I missed you, then)

user75 Carlos being on the right side of history… he ends your favs

user76 notice that all of the flops have shut right up now that it’s been proven that their favorite cheater was lying the whole time

user77 all the hottest drivers have been on y/n’s side…

fernandoalo_official ¿Cómo estuvo el descanso? 😁

yourusername relajante 😅

fernandoalo_official ¿porqué es eso? 🤔

yourusername 🤫

translation: (how was the break?) (relaxing 😅) (why is that? 🤔) (🤫)

user78 the comments from the drivers are so cute

user79 I didn’t know she spoke Spanish

lewishamilton welcome back, y/n 🥳

yourusername thanks lew 🫶

user80 bestie for the resties with lew 🥰

user81 my top 3 drivers all commenting on my number 1 artists’ post… you love to see it

user82 I sense aoty

logansargeant isn’t it delicate?

yourusername isn’t it?

user83 wtf are these hoes talking about

user84 my glorious queen y/n l/n

user85 🐍🐍🐍

TWITTER

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yourusername

liked by logansargeant danielricciardo and 49,008,776 others

yourusername reputation 5/18/24

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user86 WHAT THE HELL

user87 NAHHHHHHHH

user88 is max ready to die?

user89 🐍

user90 breakup album?!?!?!

user91 max never to be seen again

charles_leclerc 🐍

yourusername 🐍

user92 and Charles is here, why? That man was first in line for the y/n hate train I don’t want to hear it.

fernandoalo_official slay

yourusername ?

user93 y/n and Alonso’s comments are killing me

user94 my favorite cheater and snake 💋

user95 who cares, no one likes youuuu

user96 she hasn’t been good since fearless

logansargeant so it goes

yourusername …

user97 these bitches love to chat about nothing for the sake of the plot istg

lilymhe 🫶

yourusername 🫶

user98 AWWWW LILY

yourinstagram

liked by charles_leclerc landonorris and 34,998,770 others

yourusername got some big enemies… reputation out now 🐍

Tagged: lewishamilton charles_leclerc edsheeran

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user99 XNDA!?????? Y/N BROUGHT BACK XNDA!?

user100 THESE ARENT BREAK UP SONGS Y/N

user101 SHE ATE SHE SERVED SHE DIDNT COME HERE TO PLAY

user102 nah because Lewis makes sense, that man has like a real-life mainstream artist song… WTF IS CHARLES DOING HERE????

user103 I haven’t even listened to the album yet because I’m too shocked by the track list 😭

user104 wtf do you mean Lewis and ed Sheeran made a song together??? 7-time wdc Lewis Hamilton and ginger boy ed Sheeran??? Nah

user105 releasing the album right before arguably the biggest and most historic race of the season… y/n I know who you are

user106 oh the amount of questions max is going to get about this album

logansargeant walking with his head down

yourusername I’m the one he’s walking to

user107 SONG LYRICS SONG LYRICS

carlossainz muy bueno hermosa!!! 🖤

yourusername gracias Carlos 🥹 🫶

user108 big brother Carlos, don’t talk to me I’m delicate 😭🫶

charles_leclerc thank you for inviting me! 🖤

yourusername none of this would’ve happened without you, cha! Merci beaucoup mon ami! 🖤

user109 huh???

user110 what did Charles add to this situation??

user111 we’ve all moved on way too quickly from whatever tf Logan is doing here

user112 lowk he was the mastermind behind it all but yall don’t wanna talk about that

lewishamilton the album is absolutely amazing, honored to be a part of it. Very proud of you, y/n 🖤🖤🖤

yourusername 🥹 love you lew

user113 NOW WHO TF IS THIS ALBUM ABOUT

TWITTER

@casperlikej @evie-119

[thevirtualvalentine]

PRETTY FACE, BAD HABITS.

ft: Atsumu Miya, Tōru Oikawa, Tobio Kageyama, Shōyō Hinata, & Kei Tsukishima.

warnings: smut, afab!reader, daddy kink (atsumu), spanking, fingering, praise kink (oikawa), degradation, alcohol consumption (shōyō), cunnilings, enemies to lovers, small mentions of squirting, they’re lowk a lil filthy and obsessed MUNCH!shōyō bc definitely learned things in Brazil, coffee shop trope.

note: rereading hq, I am incredibly unwell and the volleyball pixels won’t leave me alone. Divider by @grlselle !!!

Thinking about gorgeous boys with pretty faces to the media who are so sadistic behind closed doors.

It goes without saying that setters are the notorious kings of this trope. Given that their charming faces tend to hide a fundamental need to be in control, constantly calling the shots n’ all. The facade cracks behind closed doors.

ATSUMU MIYA ... 4/10, not that shocking. He’s the face of MSBY, the golden boy. He’s got far more acceptable social skills than his other teammates: Shōyō, Kiyoomi, and Kōtarō, he knows how to handle himself in an interview. Flashing a toothy smile here, winking in a fan photo there. He has the hottest face in volleyball.

However, you had to have known about his silver tongue. It’s how he coaxes round after sadistic round out of you.

His stamina is much better than yours and to that he takes full advantage, being a pro-athlete has its perks. The downside is, his pretty face betrays the filth that spews from his maw when you fuck. “Yeah baby, think this messy pussy can give daddy another?”

He’s deplorable — that’s exactly why you keep crawling under him — the vileness you can only find there. “Y-yes, please ‘tsumu!” but woefully, it just isn’t enough for him, ever. He takes care of your trivial needs while chasing his own blissful completion.

“Ah ah baby, it’s daddy when I’m fuckin’ this cunt. Just hear how wet it is for me, fuck angel.” It’s humiliating, hot tears spilling past your lashes as his muscular thighs ram him impossibly further in you. You’re certain he’s in your cervix now.

“Shit — tight n’ creamy too,” he moans, “Feels so good on my cock.” He’s focused, a thin layer of sweat making his platinum blond hair stick to his forehead, eyebrows drawn together in concentration trying to feel everything you can offer him.

It drives you insane how he spoils you with unforgiving pleasure, never shy of showing just how bad he wants you. “Be daddy’s good girl and jus’ take it for me, yeah?”

And with a slap of your ass, he’s back to full speed, fucking you right up the mattress.

TŌRU OIKAWA … 8/10, a sleeping giant, don’t poke the bear. He was your summer fling, making you bubble with excitement and frenzy. His gorgeous face and native tongue were foreign to you but you recognized him from high-level volleyball matches on the news now and then.

Tōru was distinctly filled with passion, in everything he did you could feel it. He was a proud man through and through with a lust for victory.

That’s why he’s such a sadistic fuck, he’s too proud to stop even after he’s came inside you thrice. “Go on princess tell me, whose fingers can make you cum like this?” It’s those hands, those damn fingers you melt on every time he’s knuckled deep inside your sopping heat.

“Yours Tōru, only yours!” He’s peeled back every last restraint on your sanity with his body, reducing you to a tearful sticky mess pooling in his lap.

“I know mami, I know. You have to prove it to me though, show me how much you love it,” he muses rhetorically. His chin rests on your shoulder to get the best view of his practiced digits disappearing in and out of your tight sex; just how you like, just how you need. Those seasoned setter hands are a blessing.

“Ah! oh god — I’m, m’cumming— Tōru,” your chest heaves in his strong arms as he holds you there, letting you freely use and cream on his hands. He’s just so proud that he can make you feel good, so he’ll keep doing it. Over and over again.

“Look at you, my little slut. Just can’t help yourself from cumming all over me, hm?” The squelch of his three thick fingers and your slick coats his hand and your thighs alike.

TOBIO KAGEYAMA … 7/10, delving deeper, it makes sense. On the surface and to your friends and family, Tobio was your good boy. A perfect husband who was very successful in his career, and able to provide for you. People would remark on how starkly different your personalities were, the tabloids even going as far as questioning his feelings towards you.

But you know he loves you when he’s jackhammering your cunny like a rabbit. His brain only knows two things, volleyball and then all his other primal instincts. “Gonna fuck you till you’re sore, you hear me?”

He’s pushed your drooling face into the mattress to deepen your arch, greedy to feel more of your pussy suck him like candy. “You think I don’t see the way you watch me whore,” it’s like he’s punishing you with each grueling stroke of his thick cock inside you. “That’s exactly why you’re getting fucked like one. A dirty, cock-hungry, whore.”

That polite well-mannered man, a simple facade for something more sinister. They mistake his introversion for shyness when in reality he’s most likely self-censoring. He’s not much of a people person and lives a secluded life.

But all throughout his private practice today you plagued him with this singular thought: Kageyama craves it to no end, your utter and total obedience to him. He’s used to controlling his spikers, but you? You bring out an entirely new sadistic side of him. His one track mind learning every inch of your body fast.

“Stop! it’s t’much,” you cry into the sheets, overwhelmed by his sheer power. It feels like he’s deep in your guts with every strong piston of his hips against your ass. The sound of skin slapping against skin fills your ears making your brain fuzzy.

“Maybe you should think about that next time you try and tease me,” he knows you want it exactly like this. You rile him up to get a rise out of him, pushing him to his limits and beyond. Exactly how he likes it.

He snakes a hand in between your warm connected bodies, pressing his palm over the outline of himself nestled in your tummy. “Remember how my dick feels inside you right now,” and he smirks feeling you tighten up around him.

You’re so incredibly plaint to a guy like him. His perfectly tuned toy.

With middle blockers, it’s different. They just want to watch you submit. Whether they’re reading the court, blocking, or killing the ball; it gives them an indistinguishable thrill to bring something to its knees deliberately.

SHŌYŌ HINATA … 11/10, virtually undetectable thus making him the most dangerous. When you met him, you found him to be a bit too big for his britches. He was such a sweet guy nonetheless, buying your drinks and slotting a friendly arm around your waist that night.

It felt good to have his attention, those dark brown eyes analyzing your every jiggle and jive. For some reason that night no one else seemed to approach you, perhaps it was due to the fact that #21 of Asas São Paulo had his eye on you.

“Do you wanna come home with me,” you ask him smooth as silk, carding your nails in his short ginger locks. He purs in response, groaning at the sensation and grinding himself against the thin cloth of your club dress.

He’s deceptive, but it’s not on purpose. “Please mami.” He just needs you to know how badly he wants you. Do you not realize he’s everything you need? No matter, he’ll show you.

“Mhhhm, more Shō,” you breathe life into his name like it’s a prayer, supple thighs caging his face to keep him planted there between them. It’s not like he’s going anywhere though, lips suckling on your sweetness as he lifts your ass off the bed to get a better taste.

His mouth does things you didn’t know it could do, massaging your pillowy folds before diving tongue first into your wet slit. It was making you feel hot watching him as he watched you, intent on making you buck against him for more.

He welcomes it, grinding his raging boner into the mattress and groaning into your pussy. “So fucking sexy when you do that baby, drives me crazy,” he says through kisses with your swollen clit.

That same sweet guy is nowhere to be found as there's an insatiable monster between your legs that you willingly invited into your home. “Keep goin’ love, wanna make this sweet pussy squirt.” You’re his, hook line, and sinker.

ps: don’t worry, after this, he’ll go three more rounds with just his cock alone and you better be able to handle it.

KEI TSUKISHIMA … 9/10, only triggered if you can get him to open his big mouth. He was a quiet man. Stoic as he sat in the same chair, in the same corner, at the same café, every day at exactly 6 am.

He may have been the most beautiful person you’d ever seen. Well dressed with fair skin, golden eyes, and blond hair that made him stand out amongst the other patrons. Not to mention the fact he was ginormous, making the cafe chairs almost look like stools as he quietly checked his email. From over your shoulder, you watch him adjust his glasses, opting to look from afar but not touch.

It seems he doesn’t give you the chance though, approaching you as your heart beats loudly in your chest. He’s even more gorgeous as he grows close. His skin smooth like marble matches the stiffness of his face. “You seem to have a staring problem.”

At first, Kei thought you might have been a Frogs fan. That's the only possible excuse he could muster. Then he began to notice the lingering stares as well.

Excuse me— Did you just hear him correctly? You certainly didn’t mean him any harm, if anything it was a compliment. “And you seem to have an attitude problem, doesn’t seem like much can help that though. Goodbye,” you practically scoff before returning to your book and good coffee. What an arrogant fucking jerk.

Before he leaves, he drops a small piece of paper next to your cup. “Have a nice day, miss stalker,” you huff under your breath unfolding the small slip. ‘Maybe you can fix me. xxx-xxx-xxxx'

Since then, the only thing you two seem to do is argue. Especially when he’s stuffed eight inches deep in you from behind, “giving me so much attitude when you just needed a good fuck.” Him and that big fucking mouth, he must love hearing himself talk.

“if you wanted to get fucked like a slut then you could have just said so, brat.” He sneers, spanking you with considerable force behind his meaty palm. You’re Keis’ good girl, of course you can take it. He's trained you to do so.

“Sh-shut up and just fuck me Kei,” he loves when you talk to him like that, using his name like you own it. You’re wrapped around his finger as he bullies his girth into you.

“How can I when this greedy cunt’s not letting me go?” He’s right, within these four walls you’re his as you clench around him even tighter. “You can’t even fit all this,” he’s just inexplicably sexy, condescending yet so giving as he angles himself forward into the plush of your ass.

Pleasing you is an art to him, a deliberate one that he studies to get the best results. It’s brutal how fat his dick is, it matches his brash personality. “Go on, cum.” He says with sheer confidence.

Seconds later you’re unraveling before him as if it was pre-meditated. Like he instinctively knew when it was going to occur, permitting you before the act.

[sixosix]

no one's ever had me, not like you

timeskip!hinata shoyo x reader

“Are you really sure that you’re swearing off of dating?”

You wonder how many times you’ll be asked that before you finally get pressured into mingling just to get them off your back. But Akane, bless her heart, looks genuinely concerned, like choosing to stay single was a cruel fate she wouldn’t wish for anyone to bear.

“It’s not a big deal,” you tell her. “Dating’s just not for me.”

You think back to all your previous relationships, and find that you have never been more sure of your decision.

“It just means you haven’t found the right one!” To your left, Yuki, who is alarmingly a lot of shots in, exclaims. She becomes violent when drunk. You would know, your arm is starting to turn red from her smacking when laughing.

You shrug uncomfortably. “I’m not looking for any right one.”

Akane and Yuki share a glance.

“Well, if you say so,” Akane cedes.

Then Yuki slams her hands on the table as she bolts upright, expression grave and voice low as she says, “We’re doing it, though, right?”

You laugh under your breath. Yuki looks a little ridiculous, drunk, and swaying on her feet even when standing still. Her grip on her glass wavers, and you quickly pluck it from her grasp, ignoring her protesting wail.

Akane brightens. “Yes! Of course we’re doing it!”

You instead hand Yuki a glass of water. “Doing what? Are you two up to no good again?”

“Yes!” Yuki exclaims at the same time Akane calmly clarifies, “Noya’s inviting close friends out for dinner tomorrow.” Which makes sense, because they were pretty much the same thing.

“Oh! Nishinoya’s back?”

“Just arrived today! He said he’s visiting for a while.” Akane fishes out her phone from her hand, then pulls out the class’s group chat that you could never bring yourself to check ever since it hit 999+ notifications. It displays a picture of Nishinoya holding up a peace sign, face serious, and next to a large airport sign.

You hum thoughtfully. “I guess if you guys are coming…”

“Let’s go!” Yuki pumps her fists in the air. Akane smiles and tells her to settle down. Akane drank twice as many shots than her.

“Who else is coming?” You ask. “I might pass if it’s the entire school.”

“Noya’s not that wild. I heard it’s just his volleyball team, Ryuunosuke, and us,” Akane says. “I heard they’re also celebrating because Noya’s treating his kouhai’s return from Brazil.”

“Brazil?” The other side of the world! “Yuu and his friends sure are adventurous,” you remark in amusement, sipping idly on your own drink. It’s milder than either of theirs since you were assigned as the designated driver.

“You’ve heard of the guy. Hinata Shoyo, I think it was.”

You inhale your drink and start heaving. Akane’s hands flutter all over you in panic while Yuki descends in deep thought.

Yuki snapped her fingers. “Oh, right! Wasn’t that the first year who had a big crush on you when we were in second year? Noya’s favorite kouhai, Shoyo.”

Hinata Shoyo.

The first time you met Hinata Shoyo was when Nishinoya decided to invite close friends to watch them play. It was an ordinary day, and they had just come back from the Interhigh preliminaries. Their coach agreed to let them take it slow and relax, so Noya used it as an opportunity to invite his friends (it was just you who was free) to watch (read: to show off).

Having nothing better to do during club hours, you agreed.

You were late, stuck with cleaning duty, and forced to catch up to Noya, who had first wheeled into the volleyball gymnasium. The door was shut. You took deep, deep breaths before sliding it open and nearly having your face flattened by a volleyball speeding towards you.

Well, of course, it was a volleyball gymnasium.

Luckily, you managed to swerve out of the way and prevent long-lasting damage to your face. But the shock was more brutal than the would-be impact. You gaped at the ball that rolled onto the grass miles away. Just how fast was that thing?

“Y/N!” Nishinoya’s voice rang throughout the stunned silence of the gym.

Your head whipped around just in time to see a little guy with a mop of orange hair bound over to you.

“Sorry! I’m sorry! I’m so sorry—-” He then looked up at you, now only inches away, and seemed to have run out of apologies. His face exploded in a bright shade of red, but his eyes looked like they were bluescreening.

“Oh, don’t worry. It’s fine!” You wave your hand to dismiss his guilt. “I didn’t actually get hit. Well—almost. But I didn’t! That was amazingly fast!” You hoped the praise would snap him out of it, but he was still gaping at you like you’d grown two heads. Or maybe you had something on your face?

Nishinoya comes barreling over soon enough, brows furrowed. “Y/N! Are you okay? You could’ve died!”

You frowned. “Idiot. I’m not going to die from that.”

Your statement seemed to shatter the tension that froze everyone in place. The captain murmured for them to continue practicing as Noya fluttered all over you like a mother hen, insisting on an ice pack.

Tanaka materialized out of nowhere. “Y/N! It’s you!”

“Ryuu!” You exclaim in delight, returning his hug. “Ryuu, it’s nice to see you again!”

Nishinoya turned to the tiny redhead with a raised eyebrow. “You good, Shoyo?”

Shoyo finally flinched out of his daze, narrowly avoiding your curious eyes. “Y-Yes! I’m just—I’ll go get the ball!” he squeaked out, nearly tripping over his own feet on a flat surface.

Nishinoya snorted, sharp eyes following Shoyo. “I think he has a crush on you.”

Tanaka cackled. “No way! Is that why Hinata looks so constipated?”

Hinata Shoyo. You glanced back just in time to catch him fumbling with the volleyball, trembling like a frightened mouse. It’s cute.

Now, you can confidently state that Hinata Shoyo is no longer just cute. Five years later, July, in an unsuspecting get-together party hosted by Nishinoya, and Hinata Shoyo definitely isn’t the same as before.

“Everyone!” Nishinoya’s voice bellows out throughout the venue. For such a small guy, he has the voice of a booming speaker. “Everyone, quiet! Shoyo’s here!”

Choruses of Hinata! echo through everyone as the crowd dispersed and bounded over to where Nishinoya was. You hear a faint laugh and a “Thank you!” From here, you could tell that his voice had gotten deeper. Still light and high, but it was different from the squeakiness you remembered.

Ever since finding out that Hinata had been back from Brazil, it turns out that his grand debut in the Nationals was aired all over. He’s famous now, not just some kid in Karasuno’s Volleyball Club.

“Ooh,” Yuki giggles maniacally. She hasn’t drunk anything yet. “He’s here. Do you think he still has a crush on you?”

“I doubt it. It was probably because I was his senpai back then. Remember how you reacted to Daichi-san visiting our hall? Everyone in our class was swooning, especially the boys!”

“Something about volleyball players, I tell you,” Yuki says, her gaze drifting over to where Akane was giggling as she talked with them. “Hmm. Speaking of them, I think one of them is on his way here.”

“What?”

Yuki takes one last sip of her tequila shot and leaves without another word. You didn’t have to turn—didn’t even have to move. You can feel his presence the moment he is right behind you, like a burst of warmth hovering, but it’s gold and bright, so you’re not terrified

Hinata Shoyo sits beside you, asking for a drink. You can’t help but stare.

He turned to you, then seemed to do a double take. Hinata Shoyo—now built twice as big as he once was; no longer the cute, lanky, and short kouhai from your past; with neatly trimmed hair and a much deeper voice—stares at you in astonishment. Hinata Shoyo emits a wordless exclamation.

“Senpai!” he exclaims in disbelief.

“Hinata,” you laugh softly, fondly. “We’re not in high school anymore. I’m pretty sure we’re the same age. You can just call me Y/N.”

“Y-You—” He splutters, face tinged pink despite the untouched shot in front of him. “Thanks!”

“You’re welcome.” You smile, tilting your head and grinning wider at the way his eye catches on the curve of your neck. “So, how have you been?”

He forgets about the drink he just ordered, seemingly getting redder in the face as you inch closer. If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve assumed he was drunk. Hinata Shoyo grins sheepishly, blushing and looking beautiful under the dim lighting of the venue.

Swearing off of dating, hmm… 

You consider him—his bright eyes, his wide and ever-genuine smile, and his undivided attention on you. Does he still have a crush on you? Or was it just the surprise that had him so flustered? You throw your head back and gulp down a shot, ignoring the burn that slid down your throat. You suppose there was no harm in finding out.

[wintfleur]

Hiii can I pls request 🌱 childhood home/room with Charles Leclerc or lewis and female reader? Loads of fluff and maybe nsfw?

For Charles like praising but if you write Lewis maybe an age gap, praising, pocessive? Soft but dominant for both and talking the reader through it with an extensive aftercare? Like all giggling and cuddling etc would loveee that

౨ৎ it’s called charm baby !

°. — pairings ( Lewis Hamilton x female! Reader )

°. — summary ( your boyfriend knows how to make you feel better, after dinner with him meeting your family doesn’t go well )

°. — details ( g; fluff & smut. w; smut, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!!!!), cursing, hair pulling, I think that’s all?. wc; 2.7k )

﹕─┈ prompt ~ childhood room

˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( I COULD NOT STOP GIGGLING AS I READ THIS NONNIE YOU ARE A GENIUS !!!! This was my first Lewis fic, and I just loved writing for him so thank you for sending in the request, I really hope you enjoy this !!! I’m still kinda new to writing smut so I hope you guys like it <333 )

1k celly masterlist main masterlist f1 masterlist

“Well that went better than i expected” Lewis mused after he heard the sound of you closing the door behind you. His eyes were immediately drawn to your walls, taking in every detail with a fond smile. He always wondered what your childhood room looked like; he'd seen a few pictures of you in the room, but it was different from actually being there. He didn't get a chance of getting a good look earlier when the two of you had brought your shared luggage up, your youngest brother who was only a few years younger than you, whisking him away before he could really take everything in. 

You could hear the slight of sarcasm in his tone making you feel even worse on how your parents ⸺ no how your father treated him at dinner. The two of you decided to finally come visit your parents now that Lewis is on break. You were a little hesitant on coming, knowing how your father could be, but Lewis was convincing. Your mother was as sweet as always, asking questions about his career and giving his family good wishes, your two brothers were eager to talk about his career as well, your niece was absolutely smitten with him, and your father . . . completely uninterested. You knew he wasn't happy with you and Lewis's age-gap with how much he voiced his opinion about it, but still you thought he'd at least try . . . for you. 

“I’m really sorry lew, we shouldn't have come” you frowned as your eyes followed your boyfriend of a year around your room. He was taking in every detail, everything in your room made sense to him, everything was so you. Lewis looked away from your collection of posters over your desk and moved to sit on the edge of your bed facing you, a smile on his lips. “Don't say that baby, i know you really wanted to see your family, and I've had a great time.” 

“Give me a few more days and I'll get your dad to like me” Lewis promised as he leaned back on his hands, a small giggle leaving his lips as he saw the clearly old stuffed bear perfectly sitting on your bed. You feel your heart warm at his words, he was always so selfless, willing to go through anything just so he could see a smile on your pretty face. You swiftly lock your door and walk over to your boyfriend, the corner of your lips twitching up into a smirk when you watch how his eyes immediately drop to your swaying hips. 

“You are quite charming” You whispered as you placed your hands on your boyfriend's shoulders, feeling the smooth silk of his shirt as you climbed up onto his lap, the two of you keeping eye contact as he looked up at you. Lewis smirked as he heard your coquettish tone that he loved so much. The dress he bought you in Brazil riding up your thighs at the new position and he was eager to move his hands to caress your bare thighs, chills decorating your skin at his touch. 

“Oh, am i?” he teasingly asks you even though he was well aware how charming he is with how much you reminded him, a cocky smile on his lips. Lewis watched as you playfully rolled your eyes as you moved your hands to his nape, your breath hitching when you felt him slide his hands under your dress and up your thighs. You playfully chided him with a click of your tongue and a small shake of your head “Cockiness doesn't look good on you Lewis.” 

That's a lie. It looked really good on him . . . 

“Fuck but you do” lewis quickly breathed out as he looked up at you, swiftly moving one of his hands out from under your dress and tangling it in your hair at your nape and pulling you down into a wet kiss he’s wanted to do all day. A small sound of surprise leaves your lip that he's quick to swallow, his lips eagerly moving against yours. You move one of your hands to cup his cheek, the soft caress of your thumb on his jaw was completely different from the passionate kiss the two you were sharing. 

You absentmindedly grinded against your boyfriend's lap, a mix of a moan and a whine leaving your lips at the feeling of the friction against his bulging length and the feeling of his grip tightening on your hair. The two of you were both so desperate for each other's touch, having to be good and keep your hands to yourself all day in front of your family. God it was torture, especially seeing how good he looked. The lingering touches he left on your waist as he walked past you, or the soft touches on your thighs under the table. He knew what he was doing . . . 

You reluctantly pull away from your boyfriend's addictive lips, panting against his lips as you're slow to open your eyes. You lock eyes with lewis darkened ones, your thighs clenching around him when he untangles his fingers out of your hair and uses his thumb to wipe the spit off your tingling lips. “Please” your tone is desperate and whiny. You didn't have to say anything else; he knew what you wanted, and your eyes were begging him to fuck you.

You knew you were playing with fire, but your room was far enough from your parents, and you were too needy to really care. Lewis groaned as he felt you grind your hips impatiently against him, a smirk forming on his lips. He could feel you throbbing even with three layers of clothing between the two of you. Lewis chuckled and rested his hand on your collarbone, his thumb teasingly tracing the column of your throat, knowing that you were just itching to have him wrap his hand around it. His hand under your dress gripped your thigh “You think you can be quite hmm? Be my good girl?” 

“I promise lewis, i'll be your good girl” you promised as you nodded quickly, starting to get impatient as you felt his hand slowly move up and down your thigh, the cold chill of his rings against your warm skin sending a shiver down your spine. You couldn't wait anymore, and he could see that. The look in your eyes, the impatient rolling of your hips, 

“I know baby, you're always my good girl aren't you” Lewis whispered as slowly trailed his hand up the inside of your thigh. You let out a small huff of frustration, just wanting to feel his fingers calm that ache between your thighs. But you were quick to close your mouth and bite your lip at the stern look lewis gave you, he had no problem with you being needy, but he crossed the line at you being bratty. But he’ll take pity on his pretty girl, he moves his hand right to where you were needing him the most. A gasp leaving your lips at his touch while a small chuckle leaves him at how damp your panties were, his pointer finger teasingly rubbing your clit through your panties. 

“Mhm yes lew” you whimpered and leaned down to lay your head on his shoulder, softly biting his silk shirt to keep your moans at bay as he dips his fingers into your panties, covering his fingers in your slick and smoothly slipping two fingers inside your throbbing hole. You wrap your arms around Lewis muscular shoulders, a whine leaving your lips at the sudden stretch. 

Lewis smiles cheekily and looks down at you, your lips parted as sweet and quiet moans left your lips as he continued his slow movement, massaging your tight walls. Leaning down to whisper in your ear, his beard tickling your face, but you were too lost in pleasure to say anything about it “Awe darling, you're just sucking my fingers up, so tight.” 

“Feels so good” You moaned out, tilting your head to start kissing and sucking your boyfriend's godly neck, desperately needing to occupy your mouth so you wouldn't be moaning out praises and curses at the pleasure your boyfriend was giving you. Lewis let out a quiet grunt at the feeling of your lips on his burning skin, sucking and nibbling. And the way you gently rutted against his fingers and the choked-out moan you let out when he curled his fingers up, made him want to lay you across the bed and fuck you until you couldn't take it anymore. 

“Lew i need more ⸺ please fuckkk i need more” you begged, letting out a sharp gasp when he starts rubbing your clit with his thumb, his hand covered in your slick. Lewis smirks and locks eyes with you, your eyes glazed over. His poor baby was already fucked out and he hasn't even taken his cock out. Lewis kisses your forehead and slowly pulls his fingers out of your sopping hole and softly patting your clit as he whispers.

 “Only because you asked so prettily.” 

“Fuck darling, you take me so fucking well” Lewis got out between his grunts, his thumbs dipped into the dimples of your back as he holds tightly onto your waist as he thrusts into you from behind. His eyebrows furrowed and his lips parted as his gaze was fixed on where your bodies connected ⸺ loving how good your pussy swallows him in. He slides his hands down to hold your ass, his fingers sinking into your skin and spreading it open slightly to watch as his dick covered in your slick disappears in your needy cunt. 

A soft chuckle leaves his lips when he notices your trembling thighs “Feels good, huh?” 

“Feels so good” you mewled in pleasure, your arms were stretched under the coolness of your pillows, and the soft fabric of your duvet against your cheek and naked body felt so good against your burning skin. Your face was smushed against your soft pillow, hoping that it would help muffle your uncontrollable moans that only got more frequent the harder his thrusts got. 

Lewis pulls up your hips and adjusts the pillow under your hips, the new angle causing him to pound into you deeper. A loud moan leaving your lips at how deep he was stretching you ⸺ you felt so full. The sound of your skin meeting creates a lewd noise that makes you feel like you were in a trance, being lulled by the rhythmic sound. You pull your pillow closer to you, whines and moans leaving your parted lips as your body jerks forward from the hard thrusts “It's too much!” 

Lewis leans down as he continues fucking into your aching cunt, one of his hands softly rubbing up your back before tangling his hands into your hair and making a makeshift ponytail and pulling you up against his chest. Your back arched and one of your trembling hands moved behind you and dug your fingers into the skin of Lewis thigh so you wouldn't fall, a delicious hiss leaving his lips at the sting he welcomed. “You can take it baby ⸺ we both know you can” he whispered huskily in your ear, trailing off into a taunting coo, both of you thinking back on the countless times of you fucking yourself on his cock. 

“You gonna cum for me love?” Lewis moaned, feeling the way you clenched around him, the feeling bringing him closer to his own peak. “Yes lew!” you whined as you tilted your head back against him. Lewis kept his eyes on you taking in the beauty of your side profile as he continued to fuck you. Your eyebrows were furrowed, and your eyes were glazed over with pleasure, your mouth parted as quiet moans slipped past your lips. 

“I’m gonna cum  ⸺ fuckk” you cried out, but it came out muffled from lewis hand quickly covering your mouth, your head tipping forward as you felt that rope inside you snap, letting you fall into your own desire. Everything went silent for a second and you swore you lost vision as you came undone. And like a chain reaction, Lewis spilled himself deep inside of you, not being able to hold back once he felt you cum around him. Quiet grunts leaving his lips as he tilted his head back in pleasure. 

Your trembling body fell forward on your bed, a whimper leaving your lips at the feeling of him slipping out of you while a hiss left his. You snuggled your face into your unruly sheets as you tried to catch your breath and calm down from the intense orgasm your boyfriend led you to. Lewis’s sweaty chest heaved as he panted and also tried to catch his breath, his eyes closing for a few seconds. 

He looks down at your tired body and places his hands on the bed at the sides of your body, softly kissing your back a few times a smile on his lips at the sight of your sweaty body. You let out a quiet groan as you rolled over in bed, your glazed over eyes looking up at your smiling boyfriend. Lewis leaned down, placing his hands by your head so he wouldn't crush you with his body weight. 

“You did so good f’me” lewis praised you as he placed gentle and soft kisses all over your face. You smiled and shut your eyes at the soft feeling of his lips, one of his hands moving to gently caress your side. His head falling into the crook of your neck to softly kiss. You hum in satisfaction at his soft and sweet touches and whisper “up for a bath?” 

Lewis placed a few more kisses on your shoulder and collarbone before sitting up on his knees between your spread legs. You smile and sit up as well, placing your hand on his abdomen before placing a soft and meaningful kiss over his heart. Lewis looked down at you with such love, taking your hand on his chest into his and placing a kiss on it before whispering “Always with you darling.”

Lewis helps you out of your bed and into your bathroom that was connected to your room, his hands flipping the switch while you were already moving to the shelf in your bathroom, grabbing a few candles and setting them on the edge around your big white bathtub. You would be lying if you said you didn't miss your bathtub the most about your childhood room. 

Lewis rests his hands on your waist as you lean down to turn on the water, hot water soon pouring out and filling the bath. You giggle when you come up, your back coming flush against his chest. Lewis was quick to place a few kisses on your shoulder and whisper in your ear how beautiful you looked. You turn around and playfully scold him with a grin on your face “You're such a flirt.” 

“I prefer to say I'm just charming” Lewis smirked, using your words against you. You bit your lip and nod your head, touché. You let Lewis get into the bath first, and then you. Your body nestling between his legs and his arms wrapped around your waist as you leaned back against his chest. The two of you enjoyed a few minutes of peaceful silence as you relaxed in the warm bath, your muscles relaxing from the cardio. 

“I love you” you broke the silence as you tilted your head to look back at him. He could see the reflection of the candle burning in your eyes, and your lips were so red from all the bruising kisses the two of you shared. He brought his water-soaked hand and cups your cheek, bringing you closer and resting his forehead on the side of your head. Yes, the dinner didn't go the way the both of you wanted, but he wouldn't have changed anything because it brought the two of you here . . . in that soft moment filled with nothing but love and vanilla candles. 

“And i love you “

˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( ahhh im nervous about this 🤭 please tell me what you guys think 💋 )

°. — taglist ( @iloveyou3000morgan @copper-boom @cixrosie @partyinpitlane @toasttt11 )

[honeipie]

can i request kuroo x reader? they get ready for bed together in the bathroom and then have a little make out session in bed. nothing smutty just some kisses maybe a few hickies if you want 🥰🥰🥰

routine

kuroo x reader

synopsis: you and kuroo take in the domestic feel of getting ready for bed together

w/c: 651

authors note: thank you for the request!

“ugh, i hate that you take longer in the bathroom than i do. you’re such a girl” you groaned leaning on the door.

“well you could always come inside. couples usually do that”

“yeah but you’re peeing. i don’t wanna watch you pee”

“you know, some girls would pay to watch me pee” he flushed the toilet moving over to wash his hands “you’re telling me you get this whole show for free and you don’t even want a peek?”

you opened the door face scrunched up in disgust “i will look down there any other time. but if we’re in a bathroom i’m not” making your way over you grabbed your toothbrush hands brushing as he grabbed his.

“you’ve already broken that. remember that one time on our honeymoon. they had this rain shower that hit just-“

“okay! yes! thank you i remember that. i remember it very well..” he grabbed the toothpaste putting it not only on his toothbrush, but yours as well. this was when he finally noticed your choice of pajamas.

“the hell are you wearing?”

you were dressed in a dark blue hoodie, an all too familiar one to him. on the back it had hinata’s name and jersey number on it.

“.. a hoodie?”

“yeah but it’s not the right teams hoodie”

you rolled your eyes with a smile “tetsu you work for the volleyball association. aren’t you supposed to be rooting for all teams?”

“nope! i work for the japan volleyball association. that’s brazil. plus i don’t like having another guys name on you”

“it’s your hoodie!”

he mocked your words before placing the toothbrush in his mouth. you scoffed giving him a light shove.

“don’t be like that!”

“jush brush your teef” he jumbled out his words through the foam. you started to brush your teeth contently beside him. it didn’t take long before his hand was lazily resting on your waist.

it felt nice. the two of you doing these types of things together. being honest, kuroo never knew if he wanted a life like this. stuck in some routine with a person when he could be out partying in some VIP lounge with his friends. though now that he was actually here with you, the person he loved more than anything, he wouldn't trade it for the world.

the two of you finished up in the bathroom moving into the bedroom. you immediately got under the covers while kuroo shed his shirt throwing it to the floor.

"damn you couldn't even wait for me?" he mumbled climbing right on top of you.

"nope, bed was too comfy to ignore"

"i'm comfy too y'know"

"says the guy laying on me instead of the other way around"

you raised an eyebrow at him making him roll his eyes "shut up" you giggled at his sass. he moved his head up so he was face to face with you "i love you"

"i love you more"

he leaned into your smiling face, catching it in a kiss. it started off slow but he quickly got impatient. you could feel the coolness of his hands running up your sweatshirt. he moved his mouth from yours to your neck.

everything was going smoothly, just tiny kisses being peppered across your neck until-

"tetsu!" you yelped pulling him away "did you just bite me?"

kuroo scoffed trying to fight your grasp "no!.. i nipped you" he took his thumb rubbing the slightly red spot "sorry about that, but at least that one kid from your job will stop hitting on you now"

your body relaxed again feeling him rubbing the spot "he's not a kid, he's just an intern with a lot of questions"

"yeah, a lot of personal questions"

"oh my gosh i forgot to tell you. he asked what i was doing tomorrow and-"

"that's it i'm biting you again"

"but you didn't let me finish!?"

[algae-tm]

PEOPLE, PLACES, THINGS

Max Verstappen x anthropologist! Reader

Author’s note : this smau has a special place in my heart, if you haven’t noticed I’m not Caucasian, but was born and raised in Nigeria and a lot of my university life has been centred around studies of the black diaspora. My masters research is on homosexuality and Afro-syncretic religions, so have been trying to figure out how to incorporate it so thought I’d go full send and thus this was borne.

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peopleplacesthings: I spent three years (give or take) with the people of the Bahia state in Brasil, researching the afro-syncretic religion of Candomblé. My research paper on the gender roles within Candomblé (how men express masculinity, and the role of women as spiritual leaders) will be published online where everyone will be able to access it. Can’t wait to see where the world takes me next!! 🌎🇧🇷

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yourbsfuser: y/n baby I love you and your big brain, but please take a sabbatical 😭. stay in the UK for a while.

— peopleplacesthings: what’s in it for me? 🤨

— yourbsfuser: seeing your family and friends???

— peopleplacesthings: sorry gotta blast, the world is waiting 🏃🏿‍♀️

user10: your masters research on the linguistic appropriation of AAVE was vital for me completing my dissertation! Thank you so much

— peopleplacesthings: passing down knowledge is the key to preserving culture! I love when I get comments like this, well done my love.

lewishamilton: so you’re free now?

— peopleplacesthings: until my next adventure

— lewishamilton: good to know

— user10: not SIR LEWIS HAMILTON in my old TA’s comment section

— user7: IK 😭 she was a guest lecturer at my uni like one month ago! Really my two worlds colliding 😭😭

— user8: how do they know eachother???

— user9: I’m guessing they must have met one of the times Lewis was in Brazil??

— peopleplacesthings: he is my cousin! he’s much older and way less attractive than me so that’s probs why you couldn’t see the family resemblance🙂🙂

yoursisteruser: 2 back to back research papers… you could use a break from work

— peopleplacesthings: it’s not work if you love what you do 🤗🤗

— user17: 2 research papers??? How old is she?

— user19: she’s actually done 3! One for her masters which was only 15,000 words and then 2 more, her 2nd was for her PhD and she’s published her last two as books. She’s 28 if I’m not mistaken. I’m not a stalker just obsessed with her work!

— user17: oh so she’s SMART smart

— user19: bro she’s DOCTORATE OF ANTHROPOLOGY smart

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peopleplacesthings: I can check getting papped reading in the park off my bucket list… maybe I should start a book club! Anyways everything is a learning opportunity so I am currently reading Nervous Conditions by Tsitsi Dangarembga. Don’t be so surprised that I read fiction! Nervous Conditions is a valuable case study in cultural anthropology due to its rich exploration of themes related to post-colonial identity, gender, and cultural conflict. If you take my post-colonial anthropology module in September, this will definitely be on the further reading list. Come read with me! 📚 📚

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user1: are we sure this is the woman max is dating…

— user3: I was just wondering that, so out of left field 😭 😭

— user4: I mean what do they even have to talk about? She just lectures him all day?

lewishamilton: how can I take your class if I’m not enrolled in the university?? 🤨🤨

— peopleplacesthings: you can’t! Hope this helps

— user5: jeez she’s so rude…

— user9: who does she think she is????

— peopleplacesthings: Dr. Y/n Y/ln that’s who I know I am

user11: so is anthropology all she talks about, or does she have hobbies…

— peopleplacesthings: I happen to think my field of anthropology; the study of societies, people and culture, is quite interesting. But no I am a person I contain multitudes anthropology is not all I talk about.

user6: not y’all invalidating a woman with a literal doctorate just because she MIGHT be dating your fav… pls touch grass

— user13: that’s what I’m saying! If anything she’s WAY out of Max’s league, hasn’t he only ever read like 2 books?? (liked by danielricciardo)

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peopleplacesthings just posted

liked by maxverstappen1, danielricciardo, lewishamilton and 100,00 others

peopleplacesthings: We DTR’ed!!

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lewishamilton: DTR?

— peopleplacesthings: Define the Relationship apparently

— lewishamilton: my how the tables have turned, miss I don’t date drivers.

— peopleplacesthings: DR* I don’t date drivers. And what can I say my commitment issues are no match for Max Verstappen

danielricciardo: you’re welcome!

— user4: what could you possible have done

— danielricciardo: I told max to grow some balls that’s what! I’m the architect of this relationship

— peopleplacesthings: you and Lewis can fight over that title

maxverstappen1: WE DTR’ED!!!!

— peopleplacesthings: hell yeah we did!

maxverstappen1: I love you schat ❤️💙

— peopleplacesthings: 🥹 I love you too

you doofus

maxverstappen1 just posted

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maxverstappen1: Did it hurt when you fell from your culture’s dogmatic view of an afterlife?

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peopleplacesthings: I think that’s the sexiest thing anyone has ever said to me

— maxverstappen1: there’s more where that came from

— peopleplacesthings: oh shucks not in public maxie

— danielricciardo: this is the weirdest foreplay I’ve ever witnessed

user14: how did a man that drives in circles manage to bag my anthro professor??

— user16: shouldn’t that be the other way round???

— user14: if you ever attended one of her lectures and saw her in action you would know the answer to that question is absolutely not (liked by maxverstappen1)

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• TAGLIST

@forevercaffeinated-lee

@callsignwidow

@a-beaverhausen

@emryb

@c0deincrazy

@dontworryaboutitokie 

@c-losur3

@chuxk-lerclerk

@silkenthusiasts

@ietss

@sp1rl

[repulsiveliquidation]

Reservation || Laia Codina

warnings : smut (18+), fingering, cunnilingus, face-riding, lots of biting, thigh-riding.

summary : Laia goes on a little date with herself to celebrate the win over Brazil in the group stages where she meets a server who catches her eye.

Laia cheers with the rest of the team when they qualify for the quarterfinals. Pumping fists and lots of hugs later, she’s on a bus back to the olympic village with the rest of the girls. 

“So what are we doing to celebrate, eh?” Jenni asks, wrapping her arm around Laia as she leans her head on Laia’s. 

“I dunno but I need a hot shower before I even think about what to do,” Laia explains and Jenni rolls her eyes playfully, moving to make fun of Cata and her batman mask. 

Laia goes on her phone, googling all the best spots for a little quiet wind down spot near the Olympic Village. She finds a quaint little family restaurant that’s away from town, which is sure to be absolutely void of patrons. 

The pictures look promising and the local guide reviews are exceptional. As she scrolls through the photos and gets a little excited to try everything, there’s someone in those pictures that catches her eye and she’s hoping they’re there for service tonight. She calls, eager to make a reservation. A girl picks up. 

“Bonjour, comment puis-je vous aider?”

“Uh,” Laia starts, remembering she doesn’t actually know anything in French. 

“Um, connaissez-vous l'anglais??”

There was a bit of a word she understood; she smiled and nodded to no one in particular though Aitana did look at her friend funny. 

“Yes, English!” 

“Ah okay! What can I do for you miss…?”

“Laia!” She yells a little too excitedly,  “can I make a reservation for one tonight please?” 

“Yes, Laia was it?” 

“Yes, thank you so much!” 

“Of course, see you tonight, merci!”

Laia hangs up and looks quite proud of herself, sinking back into her chair on the bus. She looks out the window, mindlessly daydreaming about the girl she saw in the pictures while the rest of the girls begin to sing songs a little too loudly; before you know it Alexia yells at them to pull themselves together and shut the fuck up so she can sleep. 

Of course no one listens to her and they continue to sing, Laia joins in just as they reach the chorus of their fifth Karol G number. 

Jenni takes too long in the bathroom before she can fully rest a bit before her little date with herself in the evening. Laia feels a little nervous, unable to rest just a little before she leaves the room. Luckily the weather was nice and she could walk to the restaurant and enjoy the warm sun. 

There was a little breeze, leaving her feeling quite refreshed and eager for her little date. Following Apple Maps on her phone, she finds the place rather easily. There were lots of locals out and about in the bars, watching the Olympics with their families. 

Laia stood in front of the restaurant, waiting to be seated. There were a few people inside and it smelled delicious, she was quite proud of herself for finding this little gem. 

“Avez-vous une réservation?” 

”Um,” Laia looked up and saw her. The girl from the pictures. She stares at Laia with a little amused face, smiling bigger when she sees the little blush creep up on the Spainiards face. 

“English?” Laia manages, smiling when the server nods and starts to take a menu. 

“Does a pretty lady like you have a reservation?”

“Oh!” Laia gasps, “Sí, I mean yes, Laia.”

“Hmm, a pretty face to go with a pretty name. Come with me, you’ve got the best table in the house.”

“Really?”

“Oui, and it’s in my section,” you quip, winking at the deeply blushing Laia. 

You pull the chair out for Laia, making sure to push it in carefully. With the menu in front of her, you begin to recommend the best dishes on it. 

“What’s the best dish here?”

“Me, but I’m unfortunately not on the menu tonight.”

“Shame.”

“Yes, but our Salade de Chèvre Chaud to start would be lovely.” 

“Sí, I’ll do that. And the Ha-chis, um, Parm-men-tier,” Laia tries, chuckling softly when you giggle at her. 

“I’ll applaud you for trying but it says Meat Pie right under the French bit.”

“Oh,” Laia looks at the menu then up at you, watching as your eyes get a certain look in them. 

“How about dessert?” You ask, leaning in a little closer than etiquettely acceptable. 

“I want to keep my options open,” Laia says, her turn to be a little flirty. 

“I like that, I’ll go put your order in. Would you like a bottle of wine to go with your meal?”

“Whatever you pick will be perfect.”

You wink at her and walk towards the kitchen, taking a deep breath behind the door. Your friend, Jessie, sees you looking flush and flustered. 

“Qu'est-ce qui ne va pas?”

“The cutest girl ever just walked in and I’m pretty sure we’re fucking after she has dinner.” 

“What gave you that idea?”

“I saw it in her eyes, you know?”

“Maybe it was the delusion.”

“Maybe,” you say matter-of-factly, “she wants to give me an unforgettable night.” You punch Laia’s order into the POS. Jessie rolls her eyes at you and begins to take food that needs to be served and as you walk out to help her, you whisper a little confession to her. 

“I’m gonna let her.” 

“Here’s your Duck Salad and first glass of wine, enjoy,” you say to Laia, heart melting when she smiles up at you and thanks you in perfect French. You saw her on her phone earlier, mumbling to herself and she was clearly practicing phrases in an attempt to speak to you. When you bring her main, she’s got another nugget of information for you. 

“Thank you, the salad was delicious,” Laia tried and when she finished, you were ready to take her home with you. 

She finishes the last bits of her mashed potatoes, and since the restaurant is empty, you strike up a conversation. Laia was easy to talk to and was more than interested in talking more with you. 

“Where are you from? You’re clearly not French.”

“Spain but I live in England,”

“Oh for work?”

“Sí,” Laia says with her big smile on her face. The boss was out with his lady for the night and since he was your dad, you were allowed to sit with a customer. 

Laia offers to pour you some of her wine and you let her, watching your pretty eyes glimmer in the dim restaurant. 

“What do you do Laia?”

“I play football!”

“What’s that? Is that an Olympic sport?”

Laia, flabbergasted, begins to sputter and explain the most famous sport in the world to the prettiest girl she had ever seen. 

You knew perfectly well what it was and played a little with your brothers but decided that evening that you loved hearing her talk and this seemed like a good way to get Laia to keep talking. 

“There’s eleven people on each–why are you laughing?”

“If you asked me to marry you right now, I think I would say yes. Are you always this adorable Laia?” 

Laia understandably blushes and begins to stutter again, leaving you in a fit of more giggles. Laia stares at you as you laugh, feeling her heart grow fonder as the night goes on. 

“Oh my where are my manners,” you say, standing, “would you like dessert?”

A mischievous grin adorns Laia’s face before she speaks. 

“Only if you’re on the menu.” 

You return her mischievous grin and vow to make her night worth it. 

“That certainly sounds delicious, let me go ask the chef what he can do.” 

You come back with her bill and an exciting update on Laia’s pending dessert. 

“I get off at ten, wait for me outside?” 

Laia nods excitedly, before looking down at the bill. It was zero. 

“Wait, no! You don’t need to!” 

“Consider it our first date on me,” you lean in and kiss her cheek, “I’ll be right outside,” you tell her before turning around abruptly “Oh! And watch out for Frankie, he likes head pats.” 

Laia walks outside and sits along the street, keeping her eye out for anyone that looks like Frankie. Not long after, a fluffy, pearly white cat comes up to her, nudging his head against her shins. 

“Debes ser Frankie,” Laia tells him, checking the little collar he had that rang when he sauntered. Laia gives him head pats as instructed, feeling the little guy purr and roll over onto his back for more lovings. 

“My my, he normally isn’t that quick to roll over. I knew I was right about you,” you remark, kneeling beside Laia and joining in on giving Frankie affection. He’s more than happy to have two hands on him, mewing his head off in approval. 

“My place or yours?”

“Mine isn’t exactly one-night stand friendly,” Laia says quietly, picking at her cuticles nervously. 

“That’s okay, mine’s just up the road anyway,” you take her hand and begin walking up the street, the cool late night breeze blowing lightly on your faces. 

“You really didn’t need to get my bill,” Laia tells you, smiling nervously at you. You wave in her face and smile, telling her it was your father’s restaurant so really it was on the house. 

Your house though was a lovely two bedroom apartment that was in a quiet bit of town with no one around this late at night. There were a few tv’s on and you could barely hear the Olympics replays on them. Walking into your front room, Laia grinned and looked around curiously. 

“I love that song,” Laia says quietly, reaching for the record sitting on top of your coffee table. You come around her and put ‘Turn Me On by Norah Jones’ in the player, turning around to face Laia. Her hands find your waist, pulling you closer as yours wrap around her neck. The familiar first verse plays and she makes you dance a little, which pulls a giggle out of you. 

Both of you are nervous to make the first move and it’s because you’re both scared. As you ought to be. 

“Putain,” you mutter in French before crashing your lips on the Spaniard’s. 

The butterflies are replaced with fireworks. The nerves turned into desire. Clothes ripped from bodies and littered all over the floor. There were sirens in the background as breaths quickened. You nearly trip over your carpet when Laia walks you back to your couch. 

Her lips are like sweet candy you’ve never tasted before, her skin burning hot to your touch. She kept her hands on your waist, pulling away panting. 

“Do you want this?” 

“More than anything, Laia.” 

She presses her lips to yours again, hands much braver to explore you. The center-back reaches for your bra and unclasps it expertly, taking a breast in her mouth eagerly. 

“You’ve –ah fuck–you’ve done this before…” you gasp, back arching into her mouth. She rips her head away from you and you whine, her hand kneading the other breast expertly. 

“Sí, one or twice,” Laia responds, a naughty grin on her face. She leaves hickeys all over your chest, suckling softly on your nipple that hardened in her mouth. You whimper, hands tangled in Laia’s hair. 

“Eres tan hermosa amor,” 

“Fuck, keep talking to me Laia,” you whisper, pulling the Spaniard closer to you. She buries her face in your neck, kissing and sucking while her hands pull your leg over hers. Slender fingers slip into your underwear and a deep giggle rings in your ears when the fingers feel your soaked folds. 

“¿Estás tan mojada por un maldito extraño, cariño? Wet for a stranger?” 

“Y–Yes,” you whisper, eyes closing tightly as you feel Laia’s fingers slowly rub your clit. Her fingers are gentle but apply appropriate pressure, little shocks of pleasure surge up into your body. She takes your breast back into her mouth and sucks hard, pushing you into a flurry of ecstacy. 

“Does that feel good, amor?” Laia asks cheekily, fingers teasing themselves against your pussy. Your hips grind up and down into the feeling, her fingers naughtily pull away. She pushes you up against the armrest of the couch while she kneels before you. Your legs open themselves for her and she smiles, kissing up your legs. Her slightly rough hands send goosebumps all over your skin, breath catching in your throat. 

“More…” you beg in French, noticing that Laia immediately understands. Her hands press your hips down and her kisses begin to move higher and higher, closer and closer to your core. 

Laia leaves hickeys all over your inner thighs, licking and sucking hard on your skin. You’re all red when she moves to your core, hair slightly tousled. You pull her up and kiss her passionately, tongues exploring each other’s mouths. 

“Where do you want me touching you, sweetheart?” Laia asks, hands gliding over your tummy and inner thighs. 

“Down there,” you point, feeling a pillow rest behind your head. You fidget and get comfortable, hands aching to take care of your little problem. Laia gets comfortable beside you and shushes you, slender fingers circling your clit again. She’s slow with her movements and nibbles on your ear, feeling your body lean into hers softly. 

“Here?” Laia asks smugly, free hand slipping underneath your neck to cradle your head. You nod and your head turns into her neck and you bite a dark hickey under her ear. Laia moans, fingers slipping into your pussy which pulls a groan out of you. 

The pads of her fingertips find your sweet spot a little too easily and it sends pure pleasure through your veins. Her palm rubs on your clit and you groan, breath hot on Laia’s neck. 

“You look so pretty like this, princesa,” Laia teases, “I bet you’re prettier when you come, no?” 

Her fingers inside you make space for a third, your appreciation of being touched goes unnoticed by her; the sound of how wet you are appeals to her ego. She growls in your ear and you gush, arousal sticking to her fingers. 

“You’re getting close, sí?”

“Yes, so fucking close!” 

“Mmh, been wanting to see you come the moment I laid eyes on you,” Laia whispers into your ear, her hands speeding up inside you. They press right against your sweet spot, eyes seeing blinding white when your orgasm sneaks up on you. 

“Fuck!” 

You grip her arms and your back arches fully off the bed, her fingers don’t stop till you’re seeing stars. You search for her lips and smash them on yours, taking in her breath and your whines. She pulls away and her fingers fill your mouth. 

“Clean them up, that’s a good girl,” 

You suck on her digits sloppily, saliva running down her hand and forearm. Your eyes never leave hers, boring deep into her deep brown ones. 

“Want you to ride my face,” you whisper. Laia, taken aback, goes wide-eyed and nods slowly, kissing you hard. You lay back on the couch and Laia climbs on top of you. She’s cautious but with a little encouragement from you, she kneels over you and gently sits on your tongue. 

Your hands hold her up and she begins to grind down on you slowly. Her jaw slacks and you groan against her clit, licking up all her built up arousal. Her hands grip your hair like you did earlier, hips grinding down harder and faster the more you lick. 

Your tongue finds her hole and slips in; Laia groans and bounces just a little to ride it. Your hands however, enjoy kneading her firm ass as they help her grind on top of you. 

You’re sure your chin is pruned with how wet she is, fingers coming around her body to flick at her clit. Laia’s eyes find yours and she zeroes in on your gaze as her thighs start to shake. The invisible pull behind her belly button becomes too much to hold in and the moment you feel her muscle tension go away, she comes right on your tongue. 

This was not how you saw your night going when you picked the phone at the restaurant but it was a night to remember. 

She climbs off your face and grins stupidly, grabbing your face to taste herself off you. She moans and is intentionally sloppy with her kisses, whining when the taste of her lingers on your tongue. 

Laia’s eyes go dark and she flips you over. You’re sat on her thigh and her strong hands guide your hips to start moving. Your clit, soaked in even more slick, creates the perfect environment for riding her thigh. Your hips rock slowly, pressing down hard to increase your pleasure. 

Your hands wrap around her neck and your face tucked into the side. She whispers dirty things into your ear in Spanish, her deep voice sends chills down your spine; you’re sure you’ve never been more attracted to anyone in your life. 

“Such a good girl, making yourself come on me hm?” 

“Oui,” you whine, sucking on her neck to make the bruises you left earlier even darker. She spanks your ass and sucks on your breast again, being sure to suckle hard. Your thighs burn but you keep riding, breath unsteady as your second orgasm builds inside of you. 

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum…” 

“Ven por mí, princesa.”

You do, riding her thigh hard and fast. Your thighs shake like hers did, kissing her soft lips messily. You pant into each others mouths, feeling smiles appear on your faces. 

“That was awesome,” you tell her, slipping into her arms on the couch. She’s still smiling as she nods, leaning in to kiss you again. She wraps her arms tight around your middle, when the sound of the tv turning on startles the both of you. 

“Frankie!” you scream, seeing the pearly white beast standing on the coffee table on the remote. 

The replay of the group stage Spain-Brazil game was on. Laia’s face was on the jumbotron. 

You look from the tv to the girl whose arms you’re sitting in and see the resemblance. Your jaw drops and your heart rate goes up.

You just slept with the Spanish center-back who was here for the Olympics. An Olympian.

“So when you said your house wasn’t and I quote “...exactly one-night stand friendly,” you were talking about the fucking Olympic village?!” 

“Uh, yes?” 

“I’m gonna kill you,” you say with gritted teeth, turning around in her arms. She jumps off the couch, leaving you to chase her all over your little apartment. Frankie curls up in the warm spot near the heater and watches you two act like children, tail swishing amusedly. 

“How about!” Laia says breathlessly when you corner her in the kitchen, still stark fucking naked, “I’ll get you tickets to the quarterfinals and take you out on a proper date, my treat, to make it up to you?” 

“I want a kiss for every goal your team scores at the end, tell Alexia and Jenni they better get to scoring if you want them.” 

“Deal.” 

Laia got a total of six kisses broadcasted on the very same jumbotron at the Colombia game, but the sight of you in her jersey was just as good if not better than the picture of you two kissing that was pinned on the wall at your parents restaurant.

[bajicantspell]

Kodzuken in my DMs ❕

Summary: Kenma trying (and failing) to make a move  → Warnings: cursing (Fluff) 🎧 This is part one, although both can be read as a one shot Part two right here

Despite his dislike for being recognized in public and the inevitable social interactions that fame entails, he couldn't deny that it came with its advantages. For starters, living in a big house in his early twenties wasn’t something he could complain about. Sure, it might have been just a rental and not in Roppongi Hills, but that wasn't due to any financial constraints; he simply chose not to. Kenma couldn't complain, he loved helping his loved ones. Whether it was sponsoring his friend's volleyball career or paying off his parents' debt, it felt nice to be useful.

Honestly he never expected himself to get this far this early in his life. It really felt like one day he was streaming in his old room for the ten people that happened to join and the next day he’s a ceo of a company. 

However, one thing that Kenma anticipated to be much easier, but found it wasn't, was dealing with women. Its not like the requests weren’t piling up; it seemed like every hour there was a new girl in his requests offering him everything lewd imaginable.

 Sure, meaningless sex could be nice once in a while, but lately he’s been feeling very lonely. Kuroo was always working, his parents lived far away, Hinata was in fucking Brazil. Aside from calls with them and the occasional visits, tedious work meetings, and interactions in his stream chat, he had no contact with anyone. Kenma also considered that it might be FOMO, but the fact that he had never had a girlfriend didn't help. In high school, he avoided women at all costs. In college, he went on a few dates, but nothing serious came of them—just one okay-ish hookup. Then he went viral, and dating became harder, because it seemed every conversation ended up being about him and his internet presence. 

Kenma sighed while scrolling through another dating app. Everytime he matched with someone and the first message they’d sent was “OMFG ARE YOU KODZUKEN”  he wanted to smash the phone screen just a little more. Giving up, he sank deeper into his gaming chair, taking a few deep breaths. He needed to be relaxed for the stream he was about to start.

If you could tell your awkward-ugly-duckling middle school self that you would one day have nearly ten thousand Instagram followers just for being pretty, she would have laughed in your face. Though you were extremely grateful, it wasn't as if your life was substantially different from anyone else's. You don’t get payed for posting, you’re still a regular university student, and aside from the occasional scammy sponsorship offer that you always turned down (and the creepy men asking you to start an OnlyFans), there wasn’t anything outstandingly different about your life.One thing you did brag about to your friends, however, was that the famous streamer Kodzuken had been following you for a couple of months now.  Part of you was convinced it was accidental though, since he never watches any stories or interacts with any posts. Bummer, you thought he’s really cute. 

“I’m gonna buy a fucking gun and shoot myself” Kenma complained to Kuroo during their weekly call. 

“You say while wiping your tears with money” 

“Oh fuck off, I’m serious! I tried everything. I swear I’ll resort to just fucking my hand for the rest of my life” 

Kuroo snickered, then he started thinking of solutions for his lonely friend. “Okay, instead of being a drama queen in her fucking castle lets try to be reasonable. What have you tried so far?”

Kenma sighed, “Mostly dating apps to be honest. Ain’t working. Also checked my requests and they all sound like the plots to a bad porno.” 

“Seriously? Like what?” Kenma could hear Kuroo’s smug smile through the phone.

“Dude there was one where she offered to lick my toes. Not gonna lie it was tempting.” Kenma joked, earning a loud laugh from Kuroo. 

“Damn, living the dream. Anyway, have you tried making a move though? Cause what I’m getting from this is you expecting the woman of your dreams to fall from the sky.” 

“How could i even do that? Can’t go outside without a crowd following me around. Can’t imagine a girl who feels comfortable getting hit on by a dude with an army behind him.” Kenma sighed. 

“I didnt mean that dumbass, I know that. I mean like shooting your shot through social media or something. There must be at least one babe that cought your eye.” Kuroo reasoned. 

Kenma paused and thought for a moment, his cheeks flushing the slightest shade of pink.

“Well there is one…” 

“Oh yea? Who?” Kuroo smirked. 

“She’s not like, famous or anything, which I like. It’s @(youruser). Found her a couple of months ago. Physically she’s exactly my type, like everything is exactly what i like in a girl; face, body, hair, style, the whole shtick. Followed her a couple of months ago, didnt have the courage to say anything though.” Kenma nervously explained. 

“I say send her something, what’s the worst that can happen? Getting rejected? So what? Then you move on.” 

“I don’t know…I think she’s really pretty, shooting my shot and then messing up means it’d be weird to still follow her. Don’t wanna make her uncomfy. She doesn’t post anything crazy, just selfies and outfit inspo, but she’s so fucking cute in every pic and video, drives me crazy.” Kenma sheepishly smiled. 

“Even if she does turn you down if you’re nice about it I doubt she’ll be uncomfortable. I say do it.” 

Kenma sighed, knowing Kuroo was right. He opened Instagram and searched for your profile, keeping the call with Kuroo active in case you replied quickly. 

*ding* 

 You were in the middle of doing some coursework when your phone buzzed. Glancing at the screen, you expected it to be a new follower. Your eyes went wide when you realized the notification said ‘@kodzuken wants to send you a message’.

No fucking way, you thought. 

You anxiously unlocked your phone, your focus completely shifting from your studies. 

What you didnt know is that  an equally anxious Kenma was patiently waiting for at least a ‘seen’ with his best bud on the line. 

You opened the message. 

Kodzuken: Hey :) 

Your finger hovered over the keyboard of your phone for just a second before replying.

You: Hiiiii

You cringed at your reply, it seemed to childish and dry at the same time. 

Kenma didnt think so, he was too busy panicking over the fact that you replied. Maybe he never got over his social anxiety after all. 

“Dude she replied.” He said, not fully believing himself. 

“Damn, that was fast,’ Kuroo smirked, ‘I’ll leave you lovebirds alone, gotta catch up on some work stuff. Talk to you later!” 

“Wait Kuro don’t-” before Kenma could finish his sentence the call was over. 

He clicked his tongue in annoyance- “Asshole”, he mumbled.  

He stared at the screen, unable to muster the courage to type anything. It was then that he realized this might be the first time he truly liked a girl, due to the anxious feeling that had left him since high school. With trembling fingers unable to type anything, he sighed and set his phone down, promising himself he would reply in an hour. However, that hour stretched into several, and then two days passed. He felt insanely pathetic. 

Kenma was on call with Kuroo again, Kuroo couldn’t stop complaining about the shitty meeting he had the day before.

“He was such an asshole, fucking bastard rolled his eyes everytime my colleagues and I talked. Like shut the fuck up. If you hate your job this fucking much at least don’t bring misery into ours.” 

Kenma could only hum in response, preoccupied with setting up for his stream while his mind was flooded with self-critical thoughts.

Kuroo noticed the uncharacteristic response from his best friend- If there was one thing Kenma loved, it was shit talk, and Kuroo knew that all too well from years and years of friendship with him, and the countless brutalities that Kenma would throw at him and others he was comfortable with. He would point out things in such a monotone way, you couldn’t even be mad. Kenma was a hater to his core, so not hearing even a snicker from the other side of the line was concerning. 

“Hey man, are you okay?” He asked.

“Yea its whatever.” 

Kuroo suspected what this might be about. 

“So uh.. how did things with the girl go?” 

“They didn’t fucking go.” Kenma let out a huff of laughter through his nose, tinged with self-pity.

“Hm? How come?” 

“I panicked and left her on seen. And I highly doubt I can recover that now. Like what am I gonna say? Hi sorry I left you on seen even though I texted you first, I’m just too fucking high and mighty to reply.” 

“Well definitely don’t say that.” Kuroo joked. 

“I seriously fumbled. Fuck,” Kenma muttered just loud enough for Kuroo to hear, running a hand through his hair.

“It’s okay, man. These things happen,” Kuroo said empathetically, his voice gentle and reassuring. “Everyone fucks up sometimes. You just need to give yourself a break.”, though he didnt get a response from the overthinker. 

“You’re gonna start a stream soon yea?” Kuroo changed the subject, he knew that the best way to make Kenma feel better was to distract him or piss him off a little. The second part was coming later. 

“Yea, almost done setting up. Gonna start in five.” 

“I might stay and watch a little today, I’m off work for the weekend.”

“Kay, I’m gonna hang up now. ‘Bout to start.” 

You checked the chat a couple of times during those two days, though the bitter ‘seen’ never changed. You couldn’t lie, you were a little disappointed. You didnt know much about video games, but you enjoyed his streams once in a while. He was a bit of a celebrity crush for you. 

It was the weekend, and with not much to do, you mindlessly scrolled through Instagram stories to kill time. You stumbled upon Kodzuken’s story, it was a picture of his monitor, with the text “streaming” and a link to his twitch. Although you were disappointed with the outcome of your “conversation”, you thought it couldn’t hurt watching for a bit. 

You clicked the link, and as you entered the stream, the first thing you noticed was his not-so-happy expression. His chat was filled with messages asking if he was okay.

You watched for a little bit, nothing particularly special happening. 

As you were about to click off, Kenma snapped at his chat. "Guys, I'm fine! Please stop asking." The irritation in his voice was evident. Despite his words, the tone of his voice betrayed him, revealing a hint of underlying frustration or perhaps even distress.

Another autogenerated voiced question popped on the screen, something that happens with every donation. “Okay man! Whatever it is, don’t worry, we won’t nag you.” The robotic tone of the voice did little to mask the genuine concern behind the words.

 Kenma’s shoulders tensed for a moment before he forced a small, appreciative smile. “Thanks,” he muttered, the frustration in his voice easing slightly. He ran a hand through his hair and took a deep breath. “I appreciate it, really. Let’s just focus on the game, okay?”

You decided to stay for just a little longer, puzzled at the unfamiliar demeanor of the famous streamer. 

A few minutes go by, and another donation followed by the familiar robotic voice  “@KUROROROTETSU : don’t mind him he fumbled the insta baddie” 

Your cheeks flushed for just a second though you were quickly brought back to reality by the man on the screen in front of you.

“Fucking kill yourself. Like I’m not even kidding I need you dead on my doorstep.” Kenma cursed to distract you the audience from his embarrassment, his eyebrows furrowed and a huge shit eating grin plastered on his face.

The chat started blowing up with laughs and ‘Kodzu’s back guys’

Kenma added, “before anyone cancels me that was my best friend of twenty years, don’t take the clip out of context.” He laughed.

Your favorite comment was someone saying “guys kodzu gets not bitches he’s just like me fr”, it made you let out a small giggle.

You debated with yourself, engaging in a mental monologue. ‘If I send him a message and it turns out to be about me, that’s the best case scenario. The worst case is completely humiliating myself in front of someone really famous,’ you reasoned.

You decided that a little embarrassment was a risk worth taking this time.

Kenma continued playing as usual, engaging and laughing with his audience. He felt his phone buzz and saw the screen light up beside him.

@(youruser) : for the record, I don’t think you fumbled me <3

He glanced at the screen, reading the notification, and immediately turned beet red. His heart raced as he processed the message. Slowly, he lifted his eyes to the camera, his expression a mix of surprise and embarrassment, as if he were looking directly at you through the screen.

“I uh.. hold on guys i need to reply to this for a second.” He said as he proceeded to pause metal gear solid. 

Your screen was still open to your chat, and a surge of excitement ran through you when you saw the telltale indicator that he was typing.

Kodzuken : holy shit I’m so sry, didn’t know you were watching 

(Youruser) : ahahah dw its fine

Kodzuken : can I text you after I’m done? Totally fine if u don’t wanna tho

Well it wasn’t totally fine, he really hoped you’d say yes.

(Youruser) : I’ll be waitiiiing :) 

Needless to say, that was the longest a stream had ever felt. He could hardly wait to finish so he could talk to you; properly this time.

𝕟𝕠𝕥𝕖𝕤 ↓。

part two right here , also i found these banners on Pinterest, if anyone knows who made these pls lmk so i can give credit

[millenialfanfictionaddiction]

Being their pregnant partner

Featuring Hinata, Kageyama and

Hoshiumi

Hinata Shoyo x Pregnant Reader; Kageyama Tobio x Pregnant Reader; Hoshiumi Korai x Pregnant Reader

Warnings: Fluff

AN: I guess I’m continuing this series 😌

Hinata

“Babe I’m home!” Hinata called throughout your beach house. Moving to the beach was something he’d always wanted to do and moving back to Brazil provided him with the opportunity.

“Oh great, can you help me get my back?” You asked, appearing from behind the door, swimsuit on and sunscreen in hand.

“Uhh babe what are you planning to do? Go swimming?” Hinata questioned, taking the sunscreen from your hands and rubbing it in your back as you continued to rub it into your growing belly.

“Nope, I was thinking we could play some volleyball! It’s been so long and I know you are just aching to get back on the sand babe,” you confessed as your husband stared blankly at you.

“Umm sweetie, I’d love to play volleyball with you but umm, can you even play in your condition?” He questioned, ripping off his shirt and preparing to head to the beach.

You giggled, “well actually I was thinking more like you play volleyball and I lay on the beach. How does that sound?”

Hinata smiled before kissing your forehead and grabbing your hand, practically dragging you the beach.

Kageyama

“YN what the hell are you doing??” Kageyama shouted, quickly running to grab the ladder that held a very pregnant you on it.

“Tobio what is wrong with you? I’m just changing a lightbulb. It’s not like there’s a fire, calm down!” You scolded, climbing carefully down the ladder as Kageyama tried desperately not to get angry.

“I told you I would change it tonight Yn, why couldn’t you just wait?” He asked calmly as you glared at him.

“Well for your information, I was trying to be a good spouse and help you out. I figured you’d be tired and I didn’t think you’d freak out because I used a ladder one stinking time Tobio!”

Kageyama sighed. He knew you were only trying to help but how could he get it through your mind that he only wanted you to be safe and not get hurt.

“I appreciate it Yn but please wait for me next time ok? You’re really pregnant right now and the last thing I want is for your or our baby to get hurt ok?”

You nodded, admitting the stubborn man in front of you was correct.

“Ok fine but I still get to climb the ladder and you hold it!”

Kageyama laughed, “deal!”

Hoshiumi

“Mmm something smells amazing babe!” Hoshiumi declared as he walked into the kitchen, noticing pots and pans askew aa you hurried around cooking.

“Hey love! Just thought I’d make something special for the most amazing husband and father to be ever,” you grinned as Hoshiumi smiled, kissing your cheek and rubbing your pregnant belly.

As he sat down to eat he realized that this wasn’t an ordinary meal, nope. This meal contained his favorite plum flavored snack crackers. He stared at the crackers and back to you, his eyes now narrowing.

“Ok what did ya do?” Hoshiumi asked as you stood there, a fake look of stunned offense in your face as you ignored your husbands questions.

“What do you mean? Can’t I make a meal for my favorite husband ever?” You questioned as Hoshiumi remained skeptical.

“Well I guess, it’s just that the last time you did this, you told me you were pregnant so obviously I’m a bit nervous Yn.”

You waved your husband off, “well I can’t possibly be pregnant again if I’m already pregnant can I?”

“I guess not,” Hoshiumi responded, resigning himself to finally enjoying the food you’d prepared.

“I mean it’s not like I bought a super expensive baby stroller that you told me I shouldn’t buy but I ignored you anyways,” you smiled as Hoshiumi glared at you, food halfway to his mouth.

“See I knew you couldn’t be trusted!”

[ashdreams2023]

hello dear! I don't know if you are accepting requests, but I would like to request a five hargreeves x fem!reader

where the reader is a psychic, and she works in the more "chic" part of the commission and she is interested in Five because of some visions she has of him and nananananana

Anyway, I hope you understood :))

a big kiss from Brazil MWAH!

I reached Brazil?! Y’all I’m worldwide now 😩💕

Five hargreeves x fem reader

Watching

There’s many characters in the commission to say the least, everyone got their story and how they got there, much how you ended up there.

But you weren’t that special, you don’t think so at least, not with your coworker having the head of a cow and speaking fluent Spanish and French.

You didn’t usually interact with other employees there that weren’t in your department, it wasn’t because you thought yourself better than them but everyone other than you moved too fast, worried at lot, but you suppose the calmness comes from knowing what your future is and how very little it takes to change your fate.

It was also noted that your department tended to stay to focus on appearances and self expression, you’ll be mostly found in different outfits and fun makeup, it clashed with the usual uniform but it was fine because in your case, it mattered what you said rather than what you looked.

In your years there you’ve predicted deaths, wars, fallouts and whatever you can think about.

It was your job anyways and no one knew your face to point fingers at who is telling on their little failed schemes.

Although….there has been a change of atmosphere since you began seeing some interesting visions about a certain agent.

Five Hargreaves.

An oldie he was, yet surprisingly this was the first time you’ve seen him do something so….unexpected.

End of the world? His family? A new threat from within? Interesting.

You find yourself watching him, from your department, from the windows, he always walked with a purpose and heading somewhere.

Your coworker likes to tease you about this…sudden interest of yours calling him a call for help and that you need to get laid or something along those lines.

"There’s a thin line between sliver box and a grumpy git sweetie"

"Oh come on, aren’t you even a little curious? He’s so…mysterious"

Your staring had led to some rumors spreading around but nothing crazy, you weren’t the first to show any interest in five but it did become slightly embarrassing when you caught him staring at you during a New Year’s party.

Then you were surprised to find him up in your department looking for you.

"I thought I’ll drop by instead of our regular routine of you staring down at home like a hawk and me pretending I don’t see you"

"Oh…sorry?"

"I’ll accept good coffee and a conversation as a form of apology, meet at six outside."

Did he just ask you out? You weren’t so sure about it but it did happen and there were cameras, and to say the least, you became everyone’s business within a few hours.

"Care to tell me why a woman like you was staring at old me? I know your job here and what you’re capable of" He was so calm it made you shiver but you still kept your professional face on.

"You know as much as me that if I let something out both of us would be counting our days here"

"I see the rumors are true" He smirked

"Which ones?" Your curiosity peaked.

He took a sip from his cup "that’s a subject for another day with a much filling meal"

You bit your lip and chuckled "Are you asking me to dinner?"

The older gentleman eyed you so intensely you could almost feel the blush creeping at the back of your neck "I know a good restaurant in 1987 France"

"Hmm, it’s a date then"

"Only if you keep wearing that red lipstick of yours"

So he was watching you too "don’t tempt me I might rebel off and put something else, mess with you a little"

"I thought your department was too much of a bunch of goody two shoes"

You smiled at him then moved your under the table and kicked foot making him wince in pain.

"Pick me up at 7:30pm and a word of advice, watch out for chainsaw at your next mission" You stops leaving him stunned and clearly interested.

"Will do, will do."

[assortedseaglass]

Talk Refined - Chapter One

Michael Gavey x Reader

[Masterlist]

Summary: When Michael Gavey unwittingly insults a fellow Oxford student, they enter into a game of intellectual cat and mouse.

Content Warnings (this chapter in bold): Language, Smut, Saltburn Spoilers

Pool was never your forte. Truth be told, you were more of a darts girl. There was something though, in the soft click of the balls knocking together and the damp thunk of them landing in the pocket that scratched an itch on your over-worked mind.

Hilary term was coming to an end, and with it brought the dread that your extended essay title had been submitted. ‘“For the sake of some colour;” women as decoration, in response to Turner’s High Street, Oxford (1810)””. No going back now.

You’d escaped the January madness that had descended on your best friend, Esme. Like most other courses, she had exams at the start of the new year and spent her days in the library and nights in the pub. Much like now, come to think of it.

“You’re up,” you called to your friend as you missed potting a red. “Esme!”

“Sorry! Sorry,” she shimmied between the pool table and a few pub patrons, taking her cue in hand and leaning over the felt green. Click, thunk. A yellow sank into the corner pocket.

“Who were you talking to?” You indicated a man in his early twenties, eyeing up Esme’s backside as she leant over the table to reach another yellow.

“Bartender,” she missed the ball and passed the cue back over the table. You took it and swiftly potted a red. “Nice one. Just borrowing this,” she lit her cigarette with a metal lighter. When she was done, she tossed it back to the bartender and he winked.

The two of you’d met at a humanities and arts, inter-college social less than two weeks into your first term. Dress as your subject and be ready for a night of frivolity even Elagabalus couldn’t imagine. You’d found some of silk scarves in a charity shop, bought cheap pearls from Primark and gone as the Girl with a Pearl Earring. Outside the Blenheim was where you first spotted her. Dressed in a bedsheet draped as a peplos, she had climbed a lamppost and was swigging wine straight from the bottle. That is a girl I want to be friends with, you’d thought, and promptly beelined for her and begged for the bottle.

“You doing philosophy?” You asked after chugging the cheap merlot.

“Classics. And you, I’m guessing history-”

“History of art, yeah.”

The next morning, you’d woken in her dorm room at Brasenose, the autumn sunlight blinding and your breath smelling as if something had crawled inside you and died there. Esme didn’t mind. Her mouth was stained red from the wine and a hickey the size of Brazil adorned her neck. You’d been inseparable ever since.

“Bollocks,” you missed potting a red and, as Esme swept to grab to pool cue, the pub erupted in song.

“RUBY RUBY RUBY RUBY!”

“Ahah ahah ahaaaaaaaah!” Esme sang the refrain in your ear as she twirled you round, the cue discarded on the table.

“DO YA DO YA DO YA DO YA!?”

“Fuck’s sake,” It was hard not to smile despite your best efforts. You felt like a twat but no-one was looking at you. All were too busy singing to notice the two tipsy girls dancing by the pool table. In any case, the only person whose opinion mattered to you was the one spinning you in her arms. One wayward spin and bumped you into the pool table. Giggling, you opened your arms to be embraced once more-

“Oh shit,” Esme whispered hastily, suddenly standing straight and flattening her hair. “Got any lip gloss?”

“Erm,” you patted your pockets. “No sorry.”

“Damn,”

“Who’ve you seen?” you smirked, standing by your best friend’s shoulder and following her line of sight. Well, it could have been any number of students in the packed pub. There were some rugby lads, double polos with both collars popped. Pretty boy Felix Catton and his posse of poshos. It could have even been that girl Eleanor, now greeting a friend at the bar. Esme and Eleanor hooked up at the Brasenose Christmas party. Esme said it was “unexpected” and “not her usual flavour”, but you’d met her once after tutorial, and the way she looked at her tutor’s bottom as it wiggled down the corridor in her Peacock’s pencil skirt was not one of envy. “Well?” You asked impatiently. “Who is it?”

“There, blue check shirt, dark hair.” Esme pointed at the bar where such a man was standing. Two pints of lager in hand, he turned and seemed to look around the pub. “Cute, isn’t he? He’s at Brasenose too, doing English I think.”

“Oh right.” As a Wadham girl, you had never seen this boy before. You supposed he was quite good-looking, in a boy-next-door sort of way. You thought perhaps he would be bonny, were it not for the solemn expression on his face. He meandered through the crowd to a small table at which sat another boy.

The two were starkly different. Where Esme’s boy was dark haired, the other was fair. Esme’s boy was stocky, but even sat down the other was gangly, and while Esme’s boy clearly wasn’t an avid reader of Esquire, the blond boy looked like he’d rolled around Oxfam’s bargain bin in total darkness and worn whatever stuck; a pair of baggy cargo shorts pulled up far too high and cinched tightly with a black belt, a pair of Merrell trainers and a novelty tshirt. THIS IS HOW I ROLL. Below the wording was an anagram and equation.

If it weren’t for the middle-aged glasses and frankly atrocious haircut, he’d be quite good looking too. Two Oxford virgins; Trinny and Susannah’s wet dream.

“What’s his name then?”

“Oliver, I think.” Esme was licking her lips and fussing with her bangles.

“You look great,” you swatted at her hand. “And the other one?”

“No idea. They’re always hanging around together. Oliver,” she said his name with some uncertainty. “Oliver never says anything, the other one’s always talking a mile a minute but I haven’t really seen him about. Doesn’t go to any parties.”

“Him and the girl with-”

“Agoraphobia.” You said in unison. The characters of Esme’s college were more vivid to you now than those in a Dickens novel.

“I bet he does maths,”

“I told you, he does English.”

“No,” you tut. “The other one.”

“I reckon it’s physics.”

“Put a pint on it?”

“You’re on,” Esme smacked your hip. “Come on, there’s a table by the bar.”

Following the plume of her cigarette smoke, Esme led you to the sticky wooden table and ordered you a pint of Thatchers. She, a pint of Stella. At the table beside you both, Maybe Oliver and The Other One were talking quickly. Well, the maths-slash-physics boy was. Maybe Oliver was staring distractedly towards the other end of the pub. You looked over your shoulder. Felix Catton was settling down with another round of beers, his stupid eyebrow piercing gleaming in the low pub lights.

“Swap with me,” Esme whispered.

“What?”

“Swap with me so I can look at Oliver.”

You sighed and stood up, shuffling round the table to sit parallel to Oliver. Esme smiled at him as she sat down and he smiled back. When she giggled, you kicked her under the table. Now across from maths-slash-physics, you could see him clearly.

This close, you stood by your assessment that he could have been handsome. His light eyes were framed by not just those hideous glasses but thick, dark lashes. He had a jawline and cheekbones that would make Agyness Deyn jealous. His lips, though strangely curved were plump, and he had a distracting habit of frequently wetting them. But there was something so distinctly and undefinably creepy about him. He talked like a snake, quickly with hissed “s”s and “t”s. You noticed with unease that he barely blinked as he watched for any minutia in his friend’s reaction, and he moved with an almost jerky stiffness. All elbows and angles. This strange combination of beautiful and revolting made him impossible to ignore. Like catching yourself in the mirror after dying your hair. A strange feeling of the uncanny.  

He caught your eye, sensing you staring at him, and you quickly glanced at Esme. Shit. She’d been talking to you about something.

“-of course, it’s easy to compare the Iliad and the Aeneid, but really they’re very different.”

Aha. She was trying to impress, hoping Maybe Oliver would hear. “Oh yes?” You leant forward on your arm and wiggled your eyebrows at her. “Tell me more.”

Esme was clearly delighted that you’d cottoned on to her plan. Brushing her hair from her shoulders and leaning forward too, she continued. “Well, you have to start with the language. One is Greek and one is Latin. Now, we go through this in linguistics. Everyone has to get up to speed with their Greek and Latin so we’re all on the same level-”

You giggled and she kicked you under the table. Esme knew you already knew this and didn’t care. You knew that Esme was just showboating. When you kicked her back she got the giggles and glanced at Maybe Oliver. His eyes were still trained on the back of the pub, and she sighed, taking a gulp of beer. In perfect symmetry, you drank your cider and in the lull you admired the lengths your friend went to flirt with a seemingly average boy.

“-Jameson spends the whole time staring at her tits, completely ignoring the fact she can barely do her times tables.”

Esme choked a little on her drink and your eyebrows shot upwards with barely contained glee. This was far more interesting. You and Esme watched each other, communing telepathically about the intriguing conversation between the boys next to you.

“-times tables, Oliver!”

“Told you it was maths!” You whispered at Esme. Without a word, she got up with a smile to buy you another pint.

“-just fuck off and do history of art, love, save us all the trouble!”

You stilled in your seat, cider halfway to your lips. Did he just-? You ran the sentence over in your mind. “Fuck off and do history of art, love, save us all the trouble.” It wasn’t the first time you’d encountered snobbery about your selected study. Friends from school deemed it “hoity-toity,” and even your parents had worried about your career prospects.

“But what can you actually do with a history of art degree?”

You’d thought Oxford would be different. Surrounded by other young minds, eager for knowledge and an appreciation of the world around them, freshly opened up like your first bottle of champagne; long-awaited, exciting and with a little bit of bite. Just for the adults.

“Excuse me?” Your heart was pounding in your chest as you leant over a little and smiled at the pair of boys. You were proud of your subject but that eagerness to prove its, and your, worth was impossible to ignore. Oliver and Maths Boy looked at you.  “Do you,” you cleared your throat. “What’s wrong with history of art?”

The gangly boy scoffed and turned rigidly in his chair to face you. Like most other nerds, you’d expected him to shy away from anyone outside of his carefully selected circle. This boy, however, seemed to take up an enormous space in your mind. He was confident. Already taken aback by his vicious comment, that threw you even more.

“What’s wrong with it? It’s an easy option that’s become an elitist haven for the middle class.” He pushed his glasses up his long nose with a bony finger. “You ever met any of those ‘students’?” He put air quotes around that last word and you flinched, neck bristling with anger. You doubt he’d have noticed if you put your top over your head and did the Cupid Shuffle; he continued as if nothing happened.

“Load of public-school wankers spouting their useless opinions on aristocrats lounging about in gilded frames, just so they can justify getting a job in daddy’s gallery. It’s an irrelevant, niche subject for people who think their view of the world is superior to us mere plebs’.”

“Michael,” Oliver murmured. He turned to you, not quite looking you in the eye. “Sorry-”

“Here’s your pint,” Esme placed another Thatchers before you. Both you and “Michael” ignored your friends.

“You think it’s irrelevant?” You took a swig of cider without taking your eyes off him. Angry little prick, this fella. You knew the like; maths, physics, economics, law. The students were all the same. Thinking they were better than everyone else because they could swan off into the sunset with £40k job straight out of uni and reap the benefits that the arts provided them without any need to know better. The designer clothes and fast cars, the beautiful buildings they worked in, the nails on the woman ripping open the condom wrapper…

“What’s irrelevant?” Esme said brightly. She held out her hand for Oliver. “Esme, hi.”

“Oliver-”

“History of art, apparently.” You said haughtily.

“Ouch. Who said that?” Esme sat down beside you, still smiling at Oliver.

“Michael.”

“Who’s Michael?”

“Michael Gavey.” The man in question announced himself by extending a long arm in Esme’s direction. She shook his with slight shock and raised her eyebrows at Oliver. He lowered his head in shame.

“Our girl here’s a history of art student.” Esme patted your hand. If you, Esme and Oliver expected this to soften Michael, it didn’t work.

“Ah,” he smiled, mirth lighting his eyes. “That’s why you’re so tetchy. Which school was it then? Cheltenham? Roedean?”

“She went to state comp actually,” Ever your champion, Esme came to your defence.

“Scholarship student?” Michael sneered.

“No,” you rebuffed quickly.

“What’s wrong with that? Me and Oliver here are.”

“Nothing You were the one trying to get me to say it was.”

Michael smiled with satisfaction and an awkward silence fell between the four of you. The clink of glasses and drunken chatter continued around you. This wasn’t the first charged student encounter that had happened in this pub, nor would it be the last.

“I suppose you think maths is superior?” You folded your arms and raised an eyebrow. A challenge. Prove it then.

“Of course it is,”

It was your turn to scoff. “Why can’t there be room for both?”

“There is room for both. Mathematics is just more important.”

“Jesus,” Oliver rubbed his hands over his face.

“Mathematics is the foundation for everything. The modern world as we know it wouldn’t exist without it. Technology, healthcare, finance, governance, everything. It prevents chaos. Without mathematics, society would collapse.” He fidgeted in his chair to turn more vividly towards you, his hands excitedly grasping for something in front of him that didn’t exist. Maths, probably. “We create predictions and complex design systems so that life as we know it can exist, and continue to exist.”

He looked at you as though you should have been impressed. You supposed his excitement was quite sweet. In truth, you knew maths was important. History of art student though you were, you weren’t an idiot. You were at one of the world’s top universities for God’s sake.

“But what’s the point of existing if there’s nothing to enjoy? To live for?”

“Pardon?” What had he expected? For you to roll over and kiss his feet? Take him round the back of the pub for a quick knee tremble? “Oh yes, Michael, tell me more about Fermat’s conjecture! More! More!”

“Art is what makes life worth living for. Its history helps us understand politics, religions, societies and peoples of the past.”

“All that from staring at a Bruegels?” Michael looked at Oliver with a laugh, hoping for back up. Oliver was tearing up a beer mat.

“Yes!”

“Well, it’s never done anything for me.”

His arrogance and ignorance was astounding. This final comment was the drop that sent you overflowing with exasperation. “Yes it has,” you snapped. Michael glared at you. “Aside from what I literally just said, art has done everything for you. Take today for example.”

At this, Michael sat forward. He couldn’t resist a reasoned argument with concrete evidence.

“You woke up this morning at Brasenose, is it?” He nodded. “At Brasenose, in a dorm with Carol Vorderman posters on the walls, posters designed by graphic designers who studied art. Those posters line the walls of a building almost five hundred years old. From barely known architects to Powell and Moya, each added to its history with their extensive understanding of art and beauty. For some reason you then got up and decided to put on that God awful tshirt which, although many would believe otherwise, was designed to be aesthetically pleasing or visually arresting. The latter it certainly is. There you go. Art.” You were on a role.

“I’m assuming you had lectures or tutorial today? The book you read? The covers were made by, you guessed it, artists. You came here with Oliver and decided to get a craft beer because you’re a pretentious prick, and got the darker of the two because, and I agree with you here, the label is prettier. You’re gonna go home in an hour or two when you’ve had one too many pints and ogled that pretty girl at the bar,” you pointed at Eleanor. “Whose thong caught your eye above her low rises. Fashion? That’s art by the way and extremely influential on society ‘as we know it’.” You quoted him back and loved the way his lips quirked into a tight line.

“And thinking of her and her pretty thong, you’ll whack out ZOO mag and whack out a swift one over some big-titted page three girl in a pair of lace knickers that were designed by someone with a fashion degree. Art.”

Esme and Oliver stared at you. A manic, self-satisfied smile was plastered on your face, and when you downed your pint to cool down from the warmth that outpouring had exerted, Oliver actually smiled. Michael said nothing. Did nothing. He was entirely, utterly unreadable. You wanted to smack him.

He glanced from you to Esme, to Oliver and at last to his pint. Like you had done, he picked it up, finish it in three gulps and placed it back on the table. “Oh, sweet baby Jesus.” What the fuck was he talking about? He spoke to his friend as if you and Esme had ceased to exist. “Going for a slash. Get me another pint please, Oliver? Thanks.” He stood from his chair, unfurling like a stick insect, and made purposefully for the gents’.

Your mouth fell open. Esme chuckled nervously. “He’s a charmer,” she said to Oliver.

“Yeah, ‘scuse,” he muttered, shuffling awkwardly to the bar.

You both sat in your chairs, baffled silence befalling of you. “Well, no double dates for us then.” Esme said.

You laughed. “No date for you fullstop.”

“Yeah,” Esme glanced at the bar where Oliver was now waving at someone. You watched as he made his way over to Felix Catton and his friends. “Bit dull, wasn’t he?”

“Yeah,” Oliver sat down as the rest of the posho’s table cheered. “Though if he’s friends with Felix Catton…?”

“Didn’t realise you were so shallow?” Esme teased.

“I’m not! But the parties, Esme, the parties!”

“I know, I know, I’ll remember that Christmas one forever. Oh God, here he comes,” Esme shrank in her seat. Michael was weaving through the crowd back towards the table.

“Why isn’t he going to sit with Felix and Oliver?” You whispered. “He better not be coming back here.”

You and Esme watched as his approached slowed, faltering when he noticed Oliver and his pint were missing. He glanced around, looking at his feet as if to find Oliver on the floor. It was painful. Watching the realisation dawn on his face. You and Esme knew it before he did.

A hand raised in the air; he had spotted Oliver at Felix’s table. You watched, with pity and embarrassment, as Michael waved and Oliver turned away.

“Shit,” Esme said.

Hand moving to push up his glasses, Michael, with head hung low, left.

“Shit,” Esme said again. “Bet you feel like a bitch for shouting at him now.”

And despite his pomp and arrogance, his cynicism and creepiness, you really did feel awful.

Notes: The amount of research I did for this was wholly unnecessary. Added some links because 2006/2007 was quite a place. The script hit me like a fucking train. It says, “Back with Michael: CRUSHED.”

Many thanks to @thecruel for their help with the transcript of the Saltburn pub scene, and to @ewanmitchellcrumbs for the Michael Gavey inspo, your headcanons are always spot on.

Tags: @lexwolfhale* @theoneeyedprince @lovebittenbyevans @fan-goddess @ellrond @very-straight-blog @arcielee @tsujifreya @liv-cole @myfandomprompts @annoyingkittydetective* @elizarbell @solisarium @thekinslayersswordhand @nightdiamond8663* @slowlysparklyninja* @kate-to-the-ki @bellaisasleep @xxxkat3xxx @lacebvnny @moonriseoverkyoto @ewanmitchellcrumbs @moonlightfoxx @pendragora @aemonds-holy-milk @st-eve-barnes @sapphire-writes @babyblue711 @targaryenrealnessdarling @slytherincursebreaker @bottlesandbarricades @valeskafics @anjelicawrites @exitpursuedbyavulcan @barbieaemond @chattylurker @itbmojojoejo @humanpurposes @cyeco13 @heimtathurs @in-a-mountain-pool

*could not tag

[sunrizef1]

Please Please Please

Pairing: Lando Norris x Reader

Warnings: None

Authors Note: this isn't what the poll was for dw lmao | also I've been caught out by lando once again 😭 he's just the best fit for this song

—————————————

yourusername

📍Buenos Aires, Argentina

liked by taylorswift landonorris and 2,349,022 others

yourusername Had a great time opening for #TSTheErasTour in Buenos Aires! Muchas gracias, Argentina! 🇦🇷

load comments…

user1 so so so pretty 😭

user2 I was there 🥰

user3 loml

user4 I LOVE HER SO MUCH

user5 just looked in the mirror and sighed

user6 my favorite outfit from this leg of the tour

taylorswift 💕

yourusername 💕

user7 I FEEL SO MUCH LIGHTER LIKE A FEATHER WITH YOU OFF MY MIND

user8 that second picture is so adorable I’m screaming 😭😭😭

user9 IM TALKING NONSENSE

user10 new album when???

user11 Lando Norris in the likes??? 😭

user12 wait who is that

user13 an f1 driver 😭

user12 what’s he doing here

user13 idk 😭

user14 Y/N RUN QUICK LANDOS HERE

user15 we can’t let him get her 😭

user16 she’s so pretty I’m in love with her 🫶

——————————————

yourusername added to their story

landonorris

🤩🤩🤩🤩

yourusername

🤭🤭🤭🤭

landonorris

I saw you open for Taylor

in Brazil

your were wonderful

yourusername

I’m flattered 🥰

landonorris

I’d be even more flattered if I could take you on a date

yourusername

You usually this confident?

landonorris

No, I’m actually not

yourusername

Well

I’d love to go on a date with you Mr Norris

landonorris

😅 thank god that worked

You ever around Monaco?

yourusername

Not usually

But I could be 😚

I’m off next week <3

landonorris

Perfect

See you then

———————————————

TWITTER

MESSAGES

TWITTER

INSTAGRAM

yourusername

liked by landonorris jackantonoff and 4,777,008 others

yourusername that’s that me espresso ☕️🩵

load comments…

user17 rip sharpay evans you would’ve loved espresso by y/n l/n

user18 it’s actually so good omg

user19 best song ever made fr

user20 love love love

user21 truly that girl

user22 ON REPEAT

user23 I love her more than life

user24 IM WORKING LATE CUS IM A SINGERRRRRR

user25 face card never declines

jackantonoff rly good!

yourusername thanks jacky 🥰

user26 jack x y/n collab when???

user27 Landos back in the likes…

user28 free my girl from the shackles of a man

user29 oh my god is the song about him

user30 they haven’t been seen together in a while so I sure hope not 😭

user31 song of the year

user32 🩵🩵🩵

———————————————

yourusername added to their story

TWITTER

INSTAGRAM

yourusername

liked by taylorswift maxfewtrell and 4,000,112 others

yourusername I'm working lateee cuz its my birthdayyy 💛

load comments…

user33 how to lose a guy in 10 days dress!!! 💛

user34 💛💛💛

user35 that polaroid looks suspiciously like lando

user36 that could legitimately be anyone

user37 of course but unfortunately she's been seen with him recently so…

user38 not lando…

user39 so pretty 🤩

user40 y'all rly hate lando? That mans been so supportive I legit can't not like him

user41 ikr! I'm a proud lando defender. No reason to hate him.

user42 I love them together idc

maxfewtrell happy birthday!

yourusername thanks max 🫶

user43 still not convinced that's lando

user44 girl.

user45 😍

user46 happy birthday girl!!!

user47 my favorite pop girlie

user48 IM WORKING LATEEEEE

user49 queen 👑

user50 I love lando 💛💛💛

———————————————

TWITTER

INSTAGRAM

yourusername

🎵 Please Please Please - Y/N L/N

liked by landonorris maxverstappen and 9,880,771 others

yourusername I know I have good taste

load comments…

user51 hardest of hard launches

user52 I LOVE THEM TOGETHER I DONT CARE

user53 favourite couple 💛

user54 gorgeous gorgeous people

user55 LANDOOOOO

user56 lando wasn't even acting in that video that's just how down bad he is

user57 that first pic… 😍

user58 bring your bf to work day

user59 ...okay maybe I like him 🙄

user60 wait hes kinda hot 😭

user61 my royal couple

maxverstappen is lando gonna be an actor now???

yourusername its a good backup plan if the driving thing doesn't work out

landonorris I think I'll leave the acting to you

maxverstappen that's for the best mate

user62 lmao max

user63 they're so pretty 🥰🥰🥰

user64 so it couple core

user65 ATEEEE

landonorris yeah you do 💛

yourusername 🙄💛

———————————————

landonorris added to their story

user1

Y'all r so cute

———————————

user2

yeah she is

———————————

user3

😍😍😍😍

———————————

user4

I still don't trust you car boy

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user5

the music video was so good!!!!

———————————

yourusername

I love you 💛

landonorris

love you too 💛

———————————

@casperlikej @evie-119

[libraryofloveletters]

Mischief Is My Middle Name

pairing: redbull!sebastian vettel x reader

summary: can’t keep his hands off you and can’t keep the flirty comments away.

author’s note: again would it be me if I didn’t do seb?? this one’s for the the local seb fucker @2-fast-2-curious - also pretend insta works the same way it does now then 👍🏽

all photos are from instagram and/or pinterest :) 

written in the photos series masterlist

redbullracing

liked by youruser, sebastianvettel, danielricciardo and 233,497 others 

redbullracing: one of the more wholesome moments 😅 - on this day in last year, sebastian vettel was crowned 4 time world champion with red bull racing! 

tagged: sebastianvettel, youruser

view 939 comments 

user5: not admin calling them out 

youruser: we had plenty of wholesome moments, don’t lie admin 🙄

↪️redbullracing: I’ve heard horror stories youruser

danielricciardo: don’t be shy, post the not wholesome ones

comment liked by youruser

—— 

youruser

liked by sebastianvettel, aussiegrit, yourbestie and 92,433 others 

youruser: a break between races 

location: brazil // tagged: sebastianvettel

view 256 comments

sebworldchamp: 😍😍😍😍

sebastianvettel: why are you posting on instagram? come back to bed 

↪️youruser: I’m on the couch 

↪️sebastianvettel: throw the phone and your clothes away, I’m coming 

aussiegrit: why are you two disgusting on here too? 

— 

sebastianvettel

liked by youruser, danielricciardo, lewishamilton and 213,222 others 

sebastianvettel: life lately

tagged: youruser

view 804 comments 

user14: I want someone to be obsessed wth me like seb is with yn

↪️danielricciardo: it’s the same in real life 

↪️user14: DANIEL ?!?!?!?!

youruser: oh good choices can’t see our faces

↪️sebastianvettel: you can see my face if you sit on it

↪️user72: HELP WHAT ISHDAJDJDN

user5: when will it be my turn!!!!! 

— 

youruser

liked by redbullracing, sebastianvettel, nicorosberg and 102,433 others 

youruser: this weekend 💙💙

tagged: redbullracing, sebastianvettel

view 930 comments

user5: YESSSS GO SEB!!! 

sebastianvettel: come give me my reward 

↪️aussiegrit: there are children on here? 

↪️youruser: hi mark, bye mark - coming seb! 

user02: omg stop they’re gonna make mark retire lmaooooo 

user15: you guys are so cute omg awhhhh 

— 

redbullracing 

liked by sebastianvettel, youruser, aussiegrit and 130,593 others 

redbullracing: today, mark webber leaves the team to join porsche at the FIA World Endurance Championship. We wish him all the end and thank him for his countless contributions to this team! 💙

tagged: aussiegrit 

view 204 comments 

aussiegrit: 💙

youruser: omg bye mark <333

user02: what did I tell you guys 😭