#oh and Ted DiBiase too

[anonybaby]

I hope y’all are still invested in this story.. and if you are, I thank you so very much for your patience. I hope you enjoy and there will be more to come sooner than later. I promise! 🥹

❤️💙❤️

[luxurysystems]

A Million Dollar Man Ted Dibiase inspired Playlist with a dash of 80s/vaporwave/city-pop vibes.

[The Best Things in Life are Free.] A combination of "It's So Over", "We Are So Back", Deposits, and Overdraft fees. In the end, what's [left] in your wallet?

Link is public, but if you don't have Spotify here's the whole track list:

1. Pour Homme - Devin Morrison

2. Mercedes Boy - Pebbles

3. The Glamorous Life- Prince

4. Risky Biz - Palmy Chiller, Mayu Wakisaka

5. Limousine - Luxury Elite

6. Money Honey (Count Me In) - Dipha Barus, Monica Karina

7. PLASTIC - sakehands, Good Intent, Lo

8. Playas Never Die - Kenny Pahina, Hunter Magno

9. Vengeance - Luxury Elite

10. sex, money, feelings die - Lykke Li

[blowflyfag]

WRESTLING’S MAIN EVENT: March 1990

“THE MACHO KING” SPEAKS OUT

By TOM HOFFMAN PHOTOS BY JOHN BARRETT

[Randy “Macho King” Savage acknowledges his “loyal subjects” at Madison Square Garden.]

“Oh yea! Oh yea! No more king, moronic, simpleton, halfwit Duggan! Oh no! Finally, true royalty on the throne!”

That was the only voice that could be heard throughout the whole dressing room area at the Portland WWF TV tapings. Everybody was silent, fan favorites were stunned at Jim Duggan’s loss of his crown. So proudly “Hacksaw” paraded around the ring with his prized possessions. Some admired him, although others just thought him a buffoon, but nobody would deny he was tough. 

Ted DiBiase was standing nearby smiling up a storm. Brother Love moved next to him and said, “That “ Macho Man” has so much love in him. So much love in him for his fellow man and now for his subjects.” DiBiase replied, “This is a proud day for wrestling. A true King has been crowned, whenever he needs me I’ll be there for him, in fact I'll make sure his royal brow doesn’t have to break a sweat.”

Suddenly Sensational Sherri came running down the corridor and jumped into Savage’s arms. “We did it! We did it, my macho God!” Savage abruptly cut her off and nearly threw her to the ground. “We did it?! I did it! Oh yea! Me and me alone, nobody had to help the “Macho King” in all his macho glory! Don’t start turning into a sniveling woman, and get out of my face, I have plans to make!” Savage stepped into a nearby room and slammed the door behind him. Looking over in my immediate direction Sherri said, “He has plenty of work to do! My number one man has plenty of work to do. The true king and queen will have no more disturbance, oh yea!” Virgil then proceeded to escort everybody out of the immediate area. 

Randy Savage’s “friends” were sure that he was not disturbed until his coronation. The man who would be king was following in such a distinguished footsteps as seven-time NWA World Champion. Harley Race and martial arts expert Haku. Already being a former Inter-Continental Champion, as well as a former WWF World Champion, Savage has the credentials to escalate the “crown” to a high position in the rankings. Already “the Macho King” Randy Savage has defended his crown as the main event all over the country on top of the Ultimate Warrior’s title matches. True, the holder of the crown is a well-respected man, but will fans and wrestlers alike accept this as a new form of championship? When Harley Race was king, Bobby Heenan bestowed the honor on him because of his background and respect, but this had no real bearing on Race’s position in the WWF, he had to prove himself, just like everybody else. Haku received the honor, finally, when he defeated and knocked Race out of WWF competition but Hulk Hogan defeated Race at an earlier time. Does this make Hogan “King” Hogan? No, it doesn’t, it shouldn't. Duggan certainly did not deserve the honor of being king, he was more like the court jester. During the Duggan reign, the crown and kingship became a foolhardy campaign. With 2x4 in hand and yelling to the fans, with a cape and crown and that all too familiar stupid look on his face, how can anybody look anything but idiotic? Ironically, Randy Savage as the “Macho King” breathes life into this all but useless honor. Here is a man who truly deserves it and who can reign supreme over his subjects. But it is still not right that the honor of the crown be defended over a prestigious championships such as the Inter-Continental belt, let Savage again prove himself worthy of the main event stays he lost when he came out in the short end of the stick with his feud with Hulk Hogan. Right now, the new “Macho King” of the World Wrestling Federation does not deserve all the attention that he is receiving, a fact that the “Macho King” quickly denies, “Ooo yea! In Everybody’s eyes I am still the World Champion, yea! I was robbed by that oversized buffoon (Hogan) and that no good jezebel, Elizabeth! No one can defeat Macho Madness, oh no Mr. Duggan, that’s a fact that you and all those poor peasants out in the audience must face, yea! The macho King will reign supreme in the WWF forever!”

[Savage used Queen Sherri’s pocketbook to knock out the former “king”, Hacksaw” Jim Duggan.

Savage takes the easy way out, pinning Duggan, who is still out cold.]

Soon, it was time to move on to more important issues. If the WWF insists on making the crown a “championship”, who will be suitable challengers? “Randy, what about future challengers, say men like “Rowdy” Roddy Piper? Do you still have some unfinished business with him?”

“Mr. Reporter, Mr. Reporter, you hit the nail right on the head! Soon “rowdy” Roddy will pay the pier, yea, and that piper will come in the form of the man with the most machismo in the world of wrestling, yours truly. Oh yea, he’s tough, he’s a tough man to stand up to the Ravishing one (Rick Rude) like he did. But soon, he’ll have to move on and I’ll be waiting. Once upon a time, Piper had his “Ace” in the hole (“Ace” Bob Orton), but now I have my Queen in the hole, if you know what I mean.”

Queen Sherri finally made her illustrious presence known, slipping out from behind the “Macho King”, she cut into the conversation almost immediately. 

“Mr. Reporter, Mr. Reporter, you have to show proper respect for his Royal Highness, the “Macho King”! Bow before your king!” commanded Queen Sherri. 

I really did not want to demean myself and lower my head to the “Macho King'', but with men such as Virgil, Ted DiBiase, The Widow Maker, Dino Bravo and The Big Boss Man looking on, I felt i had no choice but to comply. Just as I started to insult my whole family heritage, Savage blurted in, “That's enough! This loyal subject has proven his friendship and respect towards the “Macho King”, you may rise.”

Now that we had all the preliminaries out of the way, I decided to delve deeper into his relationship with Queen Sherri. “Randy, what kind of arrangement do you and Queen Sherri have? Is it strictly professional. Or what?”

As soon as these words came out, I knew it was a big mistake as Randy started to shake. 

[Queen Sherri helps her man back to his feet, after the match.]

“What are you doing Mr. Reporter?! Are you spying for that jezebel, Elizabeth?! Or are you just too nosy for your own good?! Oh yea, you would like to get all the answers, all the answers to all the important questions, delve deep into the “Macho King’s” subconscious.”

“But that’s my job, to find out as much as I can and present the facts to our readers.” By now I decided to take a safer road and concentrate on his career. “Randy, how long do you suppose it will take you to drive Duggan out of wrestling?”

A grin from ear to ear came over Randy Savage’s face, “Now that’s more like it, oh yea! Not long at all, he will fall to the”Macho King”, there is no room for the two of us in wrestling.”

“What about men like the Ultimate Warrior or Dusty Rhodes?”

“What do I need with the Inter-Continental belt anymore?! I am royalty, I rule over all you insects, the “Macho King” and Queen are the number one combination in wrestling! Oh yea, bring them all on, bring on all corners that will challenge the “Macho King” even if they are champions.”

“The Ultimate Idiot? I can wrestle rings around him, oh yea! The machismo of the “Macho King” will send him back to outer space, or wherever he came from. Dusty Rhodes? He epitomizes the degrading derelicts that the “Macho King” has to put up with every day. Oh yea, Dusty, the American Dream, soon you will bow to the one and only rule, the “Macho King”!”

“There’s talk about Al Perez, new here to the WWF, but not new to the readers of Wrestling’s Main Event. He’s really turning quite a few heads, and he says one of his targets is you!”

The theme music started up for the new king of the WWF and he was all ready to proceed down the long stretch of aisle leading to the battle zone. “Al Perez? Oh yea, the “Macho King” has heard things about him. But oh no, I am not yet ready to soil my hands with the likes of him, but soon he will bow down to the true royalty!”

Both Queen Sherri and the “Macho King” pampered into Savage’s crystal scepter as it glowed from the lights shining above it. Savage started shaking even more than before, looking somewhat like a volcano ready to blow it’s top. “Forward! To the danger zone! Battle awaits the “Macho King”!”

Four minutes later, Randy “Macho King” Savage returned to the dressing room area, with his crowd firmly planted on his head. Sherri followed closely behind, “I told you he’s the greatest, oh yea, he’s the “Macho King”!”

A shout bellowed out from Savage’s sweaty locks, “Woman!”. And, immediately, Queen Sherri scampered down the hall after her number one man. 

Who will finally defeat Randy Savage? Being a former Inter-Continental Champion and a former World Champion, he does not want to become a former king. Being at the top, one gets used to the best in life. For over four years in one form or another, Savage has been one of the top seeded wrestlers in the WWF. It’s come to the point where the “Macho King” will do anything not to fall from grace… anything.

[brothersgrim]

SEND 💭 TO GET A GLIMPSE OF MY MUSE'S MEMORIES! || ACCEPTING

anonymous asked: 💭 one for taker

“Teddy, is it… Safe?” It’s a woman’s voice. Her voice. It assumes that’s Ted’s wife. But it has no way of being sure. Ted always has multiple women with him. They all ask similar questions. They all get the same answer.

It wonders if the answer is rehearsed. It must be; it’s the same every time.

“Completely safe.” From the corner of its eye, the corpse can see Ted’s smile. It’s greasier than his hair. Sharper than any blade. Colder even than the corpse. “It won’t even move unless I say so! Watch.” Oh, how it hated that word. Nothing good ever followed. Not for the corpse, at least. 

Ted’s shoes clack against the tile. Polished marble, he’d said once. Imported. Cost a fortune and a half for some people, but me? Change between my couch cushions. And the fancy, imported tile is always so well-polished the corpse can see its reflection in it. It always tried not to make eye contact. 

Ted stopped in front of it. It hadn’t been told to look up, so it didn’t. Just stared at the buttons of his suit. They were polished and gleaming, too, but engraved enough that there was no reflection. A small mercy. It's the only mercy it gets as Ted jerks his hand, sending a splash of champagne into the corpse’s face. It doesn't flinch because it wasn't told to. It blinks without permission, but this is ignored. 

“See?” Ted addresses his companion. “Totally harmless.” The corpse keeps staring at the floor. The alcohol burns its eyes, its nose, its skin, but it does not move. Not even when Ted upends the rest of his glass over its head. It is still so, so far away in its mind, but it is difficult now. This does not smell like the whiskey its father preferred. The woman’s voice does not lilt like its mother’s did. 

“If you’re sure.” She sighs, tutting. Her heels clack quietly against the floor as she adjusts her feet. “I just worry about Junior.”

Junior.

Ted’s son. 

The corpse had seen him before. He seemed… Quiet. A special sort of quiet the corpse knew all too well, but that was occasionally hidden under a veneer of arrogance that was definitely from his father. 

“Oh, Junior will be fine.” Ted tutted. “He can be as rough as he wants. Nothing will happen.” The corpse didn’t brace itself, because it wasn’t told to, but it wished to itself that it had been. The backhand connects against its jaw with a sharp crack. The corpse’s head snaps back without permission. An all-too-familiar copper joins the alcohol that inadvertently flooded its mouth. It straightens its posture to once again stand as it’s meant to, its expression unchanging even as the champagne seeps into the fresh cut. It burns in an irritating way, cutting into the self-imposed fog and eating away at the edges of fabricated memory. Drowns out the recalled scent of grass and leaf mulch and petrichor, the same way Ted’s voice drowns out what the corpse thinks its brother sounded like, asking if it wanted to see if they could get cherries down without falling. It’s so hard to hear the phantoms over Ted’s laughter. (It so desperately just wanted to hear them again–) 

“Playing rough doesn’t bother it at all. Doesn't bother me, either.” 

“Oh, stop!” The woman laughed (it didn't sound like its mother’s laugh) and swatted at Ted’s arm. “The investors are going to be here any minute!” 

“Oh, you're right!” Ted smacked his palm against his forehead. “I almost forgot. We’ll have to take a rain check on that, sweetheart. And you.” The corpse looked up when it was addressed. Ted was facing away from it, his arm around the woman’s waist. He glanced over his shoulder to make eye contact with his acquisition. “Why don’t you go take a load off? Someone’ll clean you up shortly. Can’t have a shabby centrepiece.” Ted laughed as he left, pulling the woman closer. The corpse didn’t bother to look at her face and see if it really was Mrs. Dibiase or not. It was too busy trying to cling to another face, one warped by time and distance and grief and fire. In body, it is moving step by laborious step towards the bedroom Ted had set aside for it, champagne dripping through its hair and down its face, tinged red when it drips off the corpse’s chin. In spirit, it is thousands of miles and ten years away. The plush carpet is replaced with a dark hardwood floor, a well-loved rug stretched meticulously over it. There's a different voice, soft even as it - she - tuts at it - at him. 

“Addie, you’re such a mess.” And she’d push his hair out of his face, getting a better look at the scrapes he’d collected. “It’s alright, sweet boy. We’ll get you cleaned up in time for dinner.” 

The corpse is lost in its escape. It does not need to think to follow its orders. It never needs to. It hurts less if it doesn’t. Its body will move on its own, and it can–

Huh? 

It’s stopped. It's only cognizant of the fact for two reasons: One, it wasn't TOLD to stop. Two, there's another voice telling it something. A young voice, an innocent voice, but it lacks the twang that the voice in his head, asking if they could go for a swim later, has. This voice was chasing the distant one, the remembered one, away, that sparked a dull irritation in the corpse’s mind. 

“Your face is bleeding.” The new voice said. The corpse stared down at blue eyes, a narrow face, immaculately-combed blond hair.  Not grey eyes, squishy cheeks, and messy curls. It hurts to look at the boy, but it's alright, because it wasn't told to look. It was only told to move. It turns its eyes up, away from that different innocent, damned face, steps around the boy, and keeps walking. 

“You’re going to make a mess,” the boy calls after it. It does not stop. “Dad will be upset.” 

You’re such a mess, Addie. It blinks against the alcohol that still burns its eyes, but it does not stop until it reaches its quarters. 

To most people, this room would be considered ‘nice’. A cream-and-gold colour scheme, a plush carpet, crown moulding, long, draping curtains, a big, comfortable bed. The corpse cannot sleep on this bed. It is too big, too soft, too strange, too clean. The corpse prefers the floor, though it has been told not to do that anymore. (‘What kind of man do you take me for?’ Ted had scoffed. ‘I want my property taken care of.’) This bed does not creak when the corpse sits on it. The duvet is brand-new, not worn with age and care. And the corpse knows, as it grips its own palm until its fingers ache, that the hands that clean it tonight will not be gentle.

And they will not care if it is ready for dinner.

[lorecatchup]

On his knees, looking up at someone like that???? DEVASTATING, LETHAL

Slutty new jacket for Money in the Bank

New matching trunks and boots too

First appearance of the classic CR with the chevrons

He didn't win, Daniel Bryan who got to use irl Cody's "this has been my dream since I was a kid" story did while Cody loses out on the opportunity again

He didn't appear in this Smackdown episode but they played this little video out of nowhere?

I love this look, I'm glad he sticks with it for awhile

LETHAL i tell you!!!!

Cody's out here talking about how he's going to resurrect the image of the IC title just like he's "resurrected the career of [his] friend, Ted Dibiase"

Here's the first bit of the segment but the rest of it is in the full video

They're sewing seeds of separation between Ted and Cody, either Ted's going to turn on Cody or Cody's going to tell Ted to fuck off lol

Oh mannn he's getting a shot at the IC title

How could you fight this man lmao he's like a baby doll

omg

[sportzprime]

Funny Facts about WWE the Undertaker

It’s finally official. The Undertaker announced that he will indeed participate in WrestleMania 29 against former WWE champion CM Punk.

WWE the Undertaker has become a living legend in the WWE, wrestling well into his 40s and only appearing once or twice a year. Over the last few years Taker has made himself available just for WrestleMania, giving fans little time to really think much about the character and, more importantly, the man behind the character.

Here are seven fun facts about WWE the Undertaker.

1. He Hasn’t Always Been the Phenom

Most professional wrestlers go through a few different ring names throughout their career. Undertaker has gone through eight. EIGHT.

When he first entered the business he was known simply as “The Master of Pain.” He then became Texas Red, The Punisher, Punisher Dice Morgan, Commando, Mean Mark Callous and, my personal favorite, Kane The Undertaker. Yes, you read that correctly, Kane The Undertaker.

As seen on this WWF Update, before WWE the Undertaker became…well, The Undertaker, he was Kane The Undertaker. He was given the first name to make it easier on announcers who just didn’t really use it for his first few matches.

The WWF then dropped Kane from his name and would eventually give it to Undertaker’s “brother.”

2. Once Beat Himself at SummerSlam

Undertaker has had some epic matches against incredible opponents. At WrestleMania alone he’s beaten the likes of Jimmy Snuka, Jake Roberts, Ric Flair, Triple H, HBK and Edge, among others. Taker has also beaten some impressive opponents at SummerSlam, included on that list: himself?

In the early 1990s Undertaker was dealing with some back injuries which led to a new Undertaker being introduced to the WWE audience by Ted DiBiase after WrestleMania X. The fake Undertaker, Brian Lee, was referred to by the WWE Universe as the “Underfaker” during Taker’s absence.

Eventually the real Undertaker would come back to feud with himself which led to the SummerSlam match seen above.

Not many men have beaten themselves in a match…pretty solid.

3. He’s Wasn’t Always a Wrestler

WWE the Undertaker isn’t just a talented professional wrestler, oh no, he’s a solid all-around athlete. After high school Taker took his talents to Texas Wesleyan University.

Taker was a talented basketball player and spent a couple of years playing at a two-year college in Texas before heading to Texas Wesleyan for the 1985-86 basketball season with the Rams of TWU.

Unfortunately for TWU Rams fans he found professional wrestling shortly after coming to school and from there, it was all history.

Imagine if he made it to the NBA. Mark Calaway going up against David Robinson or Hakeem Olajuwan.

4. He’s Likes a Good Fight

Taker’s basketball skills aren’t his only extracurricular sports interests. It’s also well-known that Taker likes to get away from the world of fake fighting with a night of real brawls.

Taker is a huge fan of boxing and even carried the US flag for Manny Pacquiao’s team before Pac’s 2005 fight against Velazquez. Taker also attended the 2002 battle between Lennox Lewis and Mike Tyson.

The Phenom’s love for fighting doesn’t end there. He was also part of an infamous encounter with recently-renewed WWE Superstar Brock Lesnar at UFC 121 after one of Lesnar’s fights. Taker says in the interview that he’s a huge fan of UFC and MMA overall.

5. He Beat a Legend for His First Championship

Most WWE Superstars have won a title at some point in their career. Maybe in the lower organizations, maybe they’ve even found WWE gold, but few WWE Superstars win their first professional title against a living legend.

WWE the Undertaker did just that. During his time as the “Master of Pain” in the USWA Taker won the USWA Unified World Heavyweight Championship against none other than Jerry “The King” Lawler.

King may just be a WWE announcer now, but he was one of the most important people in the history of professional wrestling in the south. He has done just about everything in the business and on that fateful day in 1989 he put over a young man who would go on to have one of the most impressive streaks in WWE history.

6. He Can Thank Hogan for His WWF Career

This one brings a little speculation with it, but the story is too awesome to pass up.

Everyone remember Hulk Hogan’s cinematic masterpiece “Suburban Commando?”

You don’t? It’s cool, it probably just took you too long to think through Hogan’s endless list of amazing films.

Well, Suburban Commando was a winner. Hogan is a space commando. After an epic space battle, Hogan’s ship has to stop on Earth. As he waits for his ship to recharge he finds himself getting into all sorts of wacky hijinx and hilarious situations.

Hogan wasn’t the only professional wrestler in the film, however.

WWE the Undertaker was signed on for the illustrious role of Hutch, a super-strong bad guy bent on destroying Hogan.

The story goes that Hogan started to become close to Taker and found out he was a professional wrestler. After seeing his impressive acting skills (because the Hulkster knows so much about acting) Hogan called up Vince McMahon who gave Taker a shot.

Can you imagine what the WWE would be like if Vince didn’t take a shot on the youngster in the video above? Could you really blame him if he didn’t?

7. One of His WrestleMania Victories Was Due to DQ

This was the most surprising piece of info I found while digging through the deep and dark catacombs of Undertaker’s long career. One of Taker’s Mania victories was won on a technicality.

During WrestleMania IX Taker took on the man with the most unsettling attire in the WWE, Giant Gonzalez. During the match Gonzalez acquired a cloth with chloroform and knocked Taker out, giving The Phenom his third consecutive WrestleMania victory.

It’s the only one of Taker’s Mania matches that was decided by disqualification and is an outcome that isn’t talked about often when WWE historians discuss Taker’s impressive 20-0 streak.

To be fair, he did return and clear Gonzalez from the ring.

[beingallelite]

There's a swarm of people in the building with him, and everyone seems to be working on four things at once. The most pressing project is a scramble to get the latest edition of Road to AEW on TNT up on the fledgling promotion's YouTube channel. Editors jump from computer to computer. All Elite Wrestling's Oct. 2 debut on TNT is weeks away, but the rush is on.

And Cody is in his element.

He, too, is doing four things at once. Gossiping about Chris Jericho's recent lost-and-found escapades with the AEW championship belt. Keeping track of announcer Tony Schiavone as he fights his way here through traffic. Strategizing with members of his team as they plot out story arcs for a wrestling character called "The Substitute" that they invented on the spot when Cody found out that Charlie "Clothesline" Ramone, one of the jack-of-all-trades trainees in his entourage, used to be a substitute teacher.

Oh, and being interviewed. Constantly in motion.

The desk is not his, nor is the building on the outskirts of Atlanta, nor even most of the video team. It's all largesse provided by wrestling legend "Diamond" Dallas Page, who has let the AEW team all but take over his DDP Yoga studio as it launches what could end up being the first true competitor to WWE that wrestling has seen in decades.

When Page walks in, Cody quickly replaces his nameplate with Page's, a bit they would later modify and steal for YouTube.

The mood is light, and Cody's eyes are bright, despite a schedule that would break most mortal men.

It's an energy level that is both exhausting and exhilarating to be around—and those in his wake say this is how Cody operates nearly 24 hours a day. He isn't merely a vice president for the purpose of YouTube sketches. He's working hard, seemingly nonstop, on getting the promotion off the ground. If he's not in a conference call to discuss business operations and budget, he's in one for marketing or for creative concerns.

Or, as he will later this day, he's sneaking in a workout, a reminder that in addition to his many duties in the office, Cody still has to step into the ring and deliver a world-class match, whether against Sammy Guevara in the opening night on TNT or in a title match against Jericho at AEW Full Gear, the company's next pay-per-view, scheduled for Nov. 9.

It's a delicate balance—the same one his late father, "The American Dream" Dusty Rhodes, pulled off for years as both one of wrestling's most potent in-ring attractions and one of its most powerful behind-the-scenes forces.

"I've never seen him not in this mode," Page said of Cody. "His old man was always positive, too. It didn't matter how gloomy s--t was, he never sold it. I would be like, 'Dream, how do you stay so positive?' He's like, 'That's the only way to be. You can't sell it, D. You can't let them feel it.' He was saying, 'Don't let them ever see sweat' before it was a commercial.

"Cody has that same confidence."

Schiavone sees the same quality. "He draws people to him. I think he's a natural leader like his dad was. His dad used to say, 'You've got to be able to walk a room like Richard Nixon.' Dusty always said that Richard Nixon could walk a room better than anybody. Dusty was like that, and I think Cody's like that too. I think you're immediately drawn to his confidence and the way he presents himself."

This, Page adds, is exactly what gave Cody the guts to walk away from WWE in the first place, despite being pretty much guaranteed a seven-figure paycheck and an all-but-guaranteed lifetime position with the leading company in his field.

He couldn't imagine life as just another corporate cog, a life where he never gave it his best shot.

"He wasn't afraid to walk away from the table because he knew he had something. Really had it," Page said. "And it don't matter who else sees it. He did."

And AEW will need every bit of that bravado.

Yes, it has the backing of the billionaire Khan family, which also owns the NFL's Jacksonville Jaguars among its many assets. Yes, it has a time slot on TNT, one of cable television's premium outlets (and, full disclosure, a corporate partner of Bleacher Report). Those are solid underpinnings to build on.

But entering what wrestling fans are calling the "Wednesday Night Wars," a head-to-head showdown with WWE—which is airing its own popular NXT show in the same time slot as AEW on TNT—this is still very much a startup trying to disrupt a corporate beast.

To succeed, it will need to summon every bit of bravado and energy and leadership Cody has in him.

If it does, it will be remembered as the culmination of a rivalry between two families as alike as they are opposites—families with the drive, creativity, energy and force of will to take a wild and woolly business in their hands and mold it into something remarkable.

While the leading roles in front of the camera have been played by Hulk Hogan and The Rock and Ric Flair, the Rhodeses and the McMahons have spent decade after decade battling for wrestling's very soul. Theirs is the story of two proud families, two distinct visions and just one business—one that the younger Rhodes is betting is big enough for both of them.

A Dream and a Rivalry

Dusty first became a force on the regional wrestling scene in the late 1970s and continued right through the fearsome battles of the '80s. Even in a world filled with big men and even bigger personalities, he was larger than life—275 pounds of blue-eyed soul who became one of the sport's true national acts thanks to the power of Ted Turner's SuperStation WTBS, one of the first cable stations widely available around the country.

His connection with the audience was legendary. In his most famous interview, he literally reached out to the camera, inviting viewers to do the same at home, to touch his hand so they might fight the good fight together. It's enough to give you shivers: emotional, powerful and poignant.

"When he talked, people f--king bought it," said Page, a family confidante. "Because he believed it. Invested 100 percent."

Dusty was savvy enough to make his greatest weakness a strength. Even in his younger days, tight perm shimmering with either sweat or blood, depending on how the match was going, he had a jiggle. By his 30s, there is no polite euphemism for what he was—a fat guy in a muscle man's sport.

Rather than work against him, his appearance was a differentiator. Dusty sashayed around the ring as the avatar of every guy in the audience who had gone slightly to pot but still fancied himself a tough guy despite outward appearances. He was the common man who hid heart, guts and sinew beneath a healthy protective layer of flesh.

But as big as he was in the ring, it was outside the squared circle where he truly made his mark on the industry. He had a vision for wrestling that was bigger than studio television, too big to be limited to National Guard Armories and the like in Florida.

His dream for America was an American Dream: big, grandiose, sometimes crazy and foolish—blood-and-guts action paired with powerful interviews—fueled by borrowed money and hope.

What it wasn't was boring, even for a second.

He created the modern wrestling supershow with Starrcade in 1983 and then powered Jim Crockett Promotions through the early stages of the wrestling wars with idea after idea—a series of stadium shows called the Great American Bash, an ultraviolent spectacle called WarGames and the cable television special Clash of the Champions, to name just a few.

"I don't think people realize the importance of what Dad did in the early 1980s," Cody said. "Boxing comes along later, but before all that, Vince and Dusty put pay-per-view on a map. And it's cool: Every year at the Hall of Fame, when my dad was still alive, he would kind of count the number of people who thanked him. Jokingly, he'd nudge you. Like eight people every year would say, 'Man, thanks Dusty for giving me my start. Without you, none of this would have happened.'"

The other version of wrestling was glitzier, a human cartoon. But while most critics preferred the Rhodes brand, Vince McMahon and his WWE won the wrestling war. Dusty had to swallow his pride, and in 1989 he went to work for his rival.

Put in polka dots as the "Common Man," he made the best of it, turning those yellow circles to gold in memorable, money-making programs with the "Million Dollar Man" Ted DiBiase and "Macho Man" Randy Savage. It was the Dream without the raw edges, and like most of what McMahon did in that era, it seemed to work.

"Him and Vince butted heads over many things," Dusty's wife, Michelle Runnels, said. "They had different ideas, and they both had really strong personalities. But he had nothing but respect for Vince and what he accomplished. Vince did a lot for this business. He took it from a world of regional promotions to a huge conglomerate. Dusty had nothing but respect for that.

"It was making money for the boys, and for Dusty that meant everything was great."

After a few years working with McMahon, Dusty went back to the WWF's competition until it finally closed up shop. He tried and failed with his own wrestling promotion in the southeast, spent time on the independent circuit, working well into his 50s doing the only thing he'd ever known, putting food on the table the only way he knew how.

Dusty spent his final decade working for the man who had bested him. When the McMahons offered him a lifeline and an opportunity to work with developing talent with their NXT brand, Dusty didn't hesitate. At NXT, he continued to fight for his vision of wrestling. Working this time mostly with Vince's daughter, Stephanie, and her husband, Triple H, he turned his attention to the future of the business.

McMahon may call the shots backstage at WWE Raw, but the passion and spirit that fuels the dreams of many WWE performers was nurtured by NXT's old oak, who often invited them to sit under his learning tree. There is a generation of budding stars who came through the WWE Performance Center in Orlando who call themselves "Dusty's Kids."

His legacy lives through them—and through Cody and Dustin, the original Dusty kids.

"Dad would be really proud of everything his boys are doing, especially Cody," Dustin Rhodes said. "He not only left the other company to go out and do his own thing, but he's actually attacked it and is in a position right now to do some amazing things. And I know Dad would be really proud. I wish he was here to enjoy it with us, because it's a fun time.

"We miss him terribly. We don't like to harp on it a lot, but we do. But we work and we keep going and we keep doing what he taught us to do. That's 'Do the work' as Cody says and 'Keep stepping' like I say. That comes from Pops. That's what we do. That's what our family was raised to do and what we've been doing for so, so long. I think our name, our legacy, is in a good place right now and we are continuing his legacy. And we will keep the name relevant and alive for years to come."

The Scion

Cody has been many things in his 34 years—athlete, actor, husband and executive, to name a few. But before he was any of those, he was a son.

"We were like the Addams Family," Cody said with a laugh. "We lived in a neighborhood full of lawyers and business people, and we were this weird family. [Dad would] come to the pool in his trunks, like his actual 'DR' wrestling trunks and his 300 something pounds...on the diving board. A lot of my friends from the neighborhood, that was their first exposure to me. Like, That's your dad? That guy?"

There is power in names. In some ways they define us, defying us to live up to the expectations that come with them or giving us something to run away from. For Cody and Dustin, their last name opened doors but also came with a price. Dusty spent a lifetime at the top of a very competitive industry, cultivating a few close allies and a much longer list of enemies and fair-weather friends.

So when Cody told Dad one day on the way home from Waffle House that he wanted to give up on an acting career and join him in the wrestling business, his father sat in his enormous F-250 pickup truck and cried.

"He did not want either of the boys to go into the business because there's a hardship," Michelle said. "There are expectations of them. People think they have it easy because of their father when in reality their paths were not easy at all. Dusty had been on both sides of the business, and he'd had a lot to do with people's careers. He made a lot of decisions, and most made one person happy and another upset. There was resentment against him from some people for a long time. And he was afraid those resentments would get transferred to his sons."

Dusty's fears, perhaps, were prescient.

It's easy to dismiss the big gold belts, to scoff at an athletic accomplishment that's gifted before either wrestler hits the ring for a match, but the truth is championships matter in wrestling. There is power in being positioned as the top performer in your industry.

And Cody, despite checking all the boxes one would normally expect a contender to check in his decade in WWE, never won a world championship.

Not that he'll give away responsibility for that.

"There's this long-standing kind of rumor that Vince has it out for the Rhodes family," Cody said. "If he does, it's deep in there. It's not...it was never on the surface. It's deep in there.

"What happened to me at the end of my career in WWE is not WWE's fault at all. Totally mine. It really is. I wasn't ready for the role I thought I was ready for. If you want to be John Cena, you got to do the exact same amount of work he does. And that's a lot of work. I wasn't doing the work that I should have been doing."

The promotion, right or wrong, never saw Cody as a wrestler at that level. And as uncouth as it is to admit, he craved it. He wanted to trade in the goofy gimmick he was wrestling under, Stardust, and ascend the few remaining rungs to the top of the card. The recognition could validate everything—from his decision to walk away from Hollywood to donning the face paint as Stardust to being a team player and making the best of every embarrassing thing he was asked to do.

Maybe it was parental and not professional judgment. Either way, Dusty saw things differently. He saw Cody as a champion, a talent with endless potential to achieve greatness. But by June 11, 2015, it still hadn't happened. Dusty Rhodes died that day of septic shock after a long battle with his own body.

The dream he inspired, however, was too big to ever fully pass into the great beyond.

"I got a boost of bravery when my dad passed away because all I ever wanted to do was be world champion while he was still alive," Cody said. "That was my biggest fear in life: I wouldn't win it. And I didn't win it. It was such a silly fear, but it came true. He didn't get to see it. He never asked for it. He never was pressuring me on it. It was my own pressure.

"But after that, I thought, 'I have zero to be afraid of.'"

Death crystallizes things. Powerful doubts and desires that might otherwise linger in the subconscious rise to the surface and demand action. Cody knew he was unhappy. He knew why. He even knew exactly what his dad would say about it.

"The one thing Dusty really wanted for all four children is for them to be happy and to live up to what he thought their potential was in whatever their chosen path ended up being," Michelle said. "Cody wasn't happy in WWE. Dusty would have said, 'Son, you need to do what you need to do. You do what is right for you.'

"Dusty made a terribly hard choice when he left Florida. Eddie Graham had been his mentor and had been like a father and was very upset, but he had to leave because he wanted the opportunity to be involved in wrestling on a larger scale. He would have understood and seen what was going on with Cody. I don't think he would have been surprised at all."

First Cody went to agents like Arn Anderson, telling them that he needed a change, that he wanted to put the Stardust gimmick away forever. Eventually, he found his way to Vince's office. At every step, he received pushback. And so, he and his wife Brandi decided to walk away. She gave her notice first, and that's when the company realized he might actually be serious about leaving.

"Hunter [Triple H, Vince McMahon's son-in-law and heir apparent at WWE] took it very personally because he had done so much for my dad at NXT," Cody said. "There was one conversation where he said, 'I'm shocked that you feel this way after everything I've done for your family.' But I told him, 'I'm not my dad. I can't stay here out of loyalty to you for giving my dad a job in 2005.' I get it, and the little boy in me really appreciates what you did for my dad. But I'm not him. He's not here anymore. I've got to be me. ...

"I think Hunter, he's been in wrestling long enough that he knew, 'Oh, this is a real one. He's not asking for more money. He's not asking for a title shot. Nothing would matter at this point.' I let the burn get too bad before I said anything, if that makes any sense."

WWE made an effort to keep both Cody and Brandi. They floated the pair contracts large enough to give pause. But understanding what the future held in WWE, Cody and Brandi ventured into the unknown, preferring the uncertainty of precarious potential over a comfortable stagnation.

"They made an offer," Brandi said. "I said, 'Thank you so much. I really appreciate you wanting to keep me here. But it's just not in my heart. I'm not going to be able to do what I want to do here.' And he said, 'Well, this is what we're going to do. We're going to go ahead and pay you through the end of your contract. You'll see real quick that money is going to go fast.' They were trying to scare us. Thank God we didn't listen."

Less than a year after Dusty's death, his younger son had cut all ties with the only real wrestling promotion he'd ever know—the place where he'd grown into an adult, met his wife and made lifelong friendships. When Cody posted the news, along with a list of all the dream opponents he could now face on the independent scene, the wrestling internet exploded. He was ready.

"I'm a big organizer and planner," he said. "So I had been in [WWE wrestler] Kevin Owens' ear, like, 'Hey, what does the world look like? I've saved a chunk of my money and I bought a home and stuff, but I want to make sure I can keep it. What does it look like out there?'

"And Kevin was the one who said, 'I'll introduce you to The Young Bucks. They're the masters of having marketed themselves outside of the company.' Me and Brandi were totally fearless in that moment. It was crazy."

Becoming the Elite

Cody took Owens' advice and connected with The Young Bucks, Matt and Nick Jackson, and through them Kenny Omega, who was building a reputation as the best wrestler in the world.

The Jackson brothers come from opposite circumstances as Cody—self-trained in their backyard on a trampoline and built, not with a famous name, but with a decade of grinding away at it until the audience couldn't help but embrace their passion and enthusiasm for wrestling.

"Cody likes to call us the extra-credit guys," Nick said. "It's really true that we had to do all the extra work to get popular and to get known."

The Jacksons convinced Cody to come to the promotion Ring of Honor for an extended run, scuttling his plans to be a nomad wandering the wrestling landscape like a character in the westerns his dad loved.

"It wasn't until after a few ROH shows that Matt asked me, 'Hey, do you want to ride with all the West Coast guys?' Which was him, Christopher Daniels, Frankie [Kazarian] and [Scorpio] Sky (the tag team trio SCU)," Cody said. "And in that minivan that they still ride in to this day was where all the fun wrestling stuff was happening."

The conversations were the cutting edge of wrestling, from "serious ROH stuff" to Being the Elite, the Young Bucks' viral YouTube show, which through hijinks like extended in-jokes and stunts like invading a WWE event has galvanized a fanbase looking for an alternative.

In the "Elite" stable of wrestlers, fans saw a reflection of themselves—like minds looking for an alternative to what WWE offered. And Cody saw a future.

"That's where I think they found my purpose in the group," he said. "My purpose in that group is as a promoter.

"We combine forces well. Kenny's a great bell-to-bell wrestler, Matt and Nick are tag team specialists, and they have this eye for the absurd and ludicrous. I bring my family's name value—not even my own: my family's name value—and my eye for the bigger picture."

Soon, events were getting so big and raucous that they had to hire security for simple meet-and-greets with the stable.

By September 2018, when Cody and the rest of what would become the AEW leadership team promoted the event All In, they didn't just sell out the Sears Centre Arena in suburban Chicago; they sold out the arena that holds more than 10,000 immediately. It was the proof of concept that solidified things, proved to Tony Khan that his instincts were correct, that wrestling fans were ready for something new.

"We had for two years straight a field test to see what worked with the audience and what didn't," Cody said. "And when we saw Buffalo, New York, was just as popular as San Jose, we were like, 'It's real. You know? It's not just Chicago. It's everywhere.' And we started to think about what might be possible."

At AEW's last big event, All Out in late August, Cody stood in the middle of the crowd and basked in their love, a sea of people who believed in him, who were on this journey with him and his partners, going wherever it led.

"We are in it together with our audience," Cody said. "And anyone who's like, 'Oh, let's see how they maintain their enthusiasm when you get to weekly TV.'  Well, guys, how many times are we going to move the goalposts?

"The argument that, 'Oh, that's not a real audience; it's just a small group of hardcore fans.' That's a dead argument at this point. It's a very real audience. And there's a lack of crossover between our fans and WWE's, which is my favorite part. We had a lady say to us at the Houston Airport, 'I'm one of the returners. I was watching in the late '90s, and now I'm watching again.' And I thought, what a great way to describe some of these folks coming into this. Returners."

It was, as Cody dubbed it, a revolution. Others called it a cult. Either way, the idea Cody is anything but a superstar is downright foolish with the power of hindsight.

At WWE, at some point talent is slotted into a position. Changing that perspective, altering your destiny, becomes almost impossible. And Cody had been trapped in a maze with no exit. Perhaps that's why at AEW's first live event, Double or Nothing, Cody smashed a throne, symbolizing his freedom from tyranny.

"It's very romantic, very like Game of Thrones-style with these warring houses," Cody said. "When I left WWE in 2015, I didn't think, like, 'I'm picking up that sword, we're going to war.' It's a wild, wild series of events. There were so many combustible pieces that led to all of this. You throw them together, and suddenly we are in a situation where I'm standing in front of the Turner Mansion with Brandi, in exactly the same spot Dusty took the team picture with WCW. And we're taking another team picture with a billionaire NFL owner who's a mega wrestling fan, ready to launch another national wrestling promotion. ...

"Had Vince listened to me when I really wanted to make the transition back to being Cody Rhodes, we wouldn't be sitting here. It's that fragile."

Page sees it as the inevitability of a force that can't be restrained.

"I remember Cody telling me when he was in high school, 'Next year I'm going to win. I'm going to win the state championship,'" Page said. "And I said, 'Really? That's a bold statement, boy.' I said, 'You know what that's going to take?' He said, 'Absolutely. You got to put the work in.' He went undefeated.

"Look at his weight belt today. It says, 'Do the work.' You never know what's going to happen because this is a startup company. But this is f--king unprecedented. But I know that if it fails, it won't be because there's not a work ethic put behind it. Why do these people care so much? Because he does. When they say 'All In,' they're not talking about money, bro. That's them telling the fans, 'F--king A, we're going for it."

The Future

Back in Atlanta, when Schiavone finally makes it through traffic and arrives, he's wearing a brand-new blazer Cody just overnighted so he won't look the same in every video and is ready to film a segment for Road to AEW on TNT in front of a giant green screen.

The same harried team, led by Steve Yu, that makes these gorgeous promotional pieces has been tasked with creating a video opener for TNT. Deadlines for everything loom, and amid the excitement, there is also a very real sense that one major misstep could be the domino that topples a carefully balanced workload.

It's unique chaos in a way, but it's familiar in a startup.

Cody's consiglieri, Michael "QT" Cuellari Marshall, is there to offer support in all areas, with students from his wrestling school filling in wherever needed. One day, they might be building the throne that Cody smashed at Double or Nothing. The next, they're feeding his dogs during a busy day. There are opportunities here, to find hidden talents you didn't know you had and to step into the breach and be a hero. Marshall himself is a prime example of how quickly you can become indispensable in a company with more tasks than hands.

"We get to All In, and the guy we had hired to be one of our main producers in the 'go' position got drunk the night before, or he used something, and he got arrested in front of the hotel," Cody said. "He literally started up his car and passed out with it in reverse. He hit another car in the parking lot and got arrested."

Marshall, sitting nearby with a laptop, creating a mock advertisement someone will later clean up and present to a potential partner, continues the story.

"My student sang the national anthem at All In, and I drove her there. I was there to hang out and watch an amazing show. But when they needed someone, I stepped up."

Marshall had previously done commentary for Ring of Honor, which prepared him for the opportunity. "I used it as an internship to see how you did wrestling on TV," he said.

The team is filled with people with similar stories, people who breathe wrestling like it's oxygen.

"Now QT is an associate producer, and he's Tony [Khan]'s favorite," Cody said. "He sits in the go position for every match and tells the director and producer what shots to look for.

"We have a lot of will it into existence at AEW. Some of these guys don't have any specific reason for being here, but the only way you really learn about wrestling is to be around it a bunch."

The result is beauty in diversity.

You can see it in the promotion's YouTube channel, the Bucks' wild 'do-it-yourself' brand existing side-by-side with Cody's polished "Road to..." series that often features serious interviews like you might see ahead of a big boxing match.

And you can see it in the ring. While a WWE show can sometimes feel like a group of performers walking in lockstep for three long hours, AEW provides fans with multiple visions of what wrestling might be on a single show. Joey Janela is there for those who love hardcore stunts, the Bucks and Omega for high-flying precision. Cody represents a modern version of wrestling's yesterdays, the blood-and-guts style of his father presented in a package built for a 2019 audience.

"I think people want us to choose," Cody said. "They encourage us to choose. It's like, 'Well, what's it going to be?' It's all of it. Luchasaurus is on the same show with Arn Anderson. I mean, that's wrestling. I'd rather people have a lot of options."

And he has them.

"It's not just Cody. He's got Nick, he's got friggin' Matt, he's got Kenny, who is a force in that world," Page said. "And now having Jericho and [Jon] Moxley, that's a f--king strong six. And you don't need a strong 28. You just need a handful of people the crowd really cares about."

Cody will be the one headlining the next pay-per-view, against Jericho.

It's a decision that has opened him up to online criticism that he's already using his authority to treat AEW as a vanity promotion, the same kind of vitriol his dad faced in some circles when he made himself the top star in WCW.

"I tell Tony, I tell Matt, Nick and Kenny every day almost, I'm like, 'Man, we need a home run every segment.' Because there's a microscope on top of a microscope on what we're doing," Cody said. "When people are like, 'He's doing the same thing Dusty did.' I always want to say, 'Yeah, well Dusty was one of the most over guys on the show.'

"I could only hope to do what Dusty did."

AEW has four wrestlers in executive roles, both for their expertise and to keep each other honest. Khan, ultimately, will have the final say and settle any disputes. The key, Rhodes says, will be self-awareness and a keen understanding of the audience.

"All of us want to be in the main event. But if you're not, you're not. It's a nice checks and balances we have with Matt, Nick, Kenny and myself. There's three guys who are going to tell you, 'Hey, I don't think it's as big as you think.' Or, 'Let's move on this. MJF is becoming a megastar, let's go this direction.'

"An old-timer wrestler will tell you, 'Hey, we lead them,' and that is not entirely incorrect. We do lead them because we present the product to them. But if they drastically want something different, it is OK to let them lead us as well. And I don't think we're afraid to let them lead a little bit. If the other company had been more aware, even 25 percent more aware, we would not be in the position or even have this opportunity."

It all comes back, as it eventually always does in wrestling, to WWE. The question, a simple one, has remained the same since McMahon expanded nationally decades ago. Can big-time wrestling exist beyond WWE's ever-expanding universe?

For the first time since WCW folded, an organization will truly try to answer it—all because one man refused to be just a gear in the machine.

"They're going to make mistakes, and they'll learn from them. They already have, you know. It's a process," Page said. "They got the hardcore fans. Now it's how does that work to pull over to the casual viewer or the WWE fan who doesn't really know they exist. But there's a lot of wrestling fans who never flipped over after WCW died. They just stopped watching. That's the fan they need.

"This is a David vs. Goliath story. And if that can get brought across to the people well—David versus Goliath always works."

Jonathan Snowden covers combat sports for Bleacher Report.

[closetofanxiety]

Mania Madness: Who’s Here for Enzo

I had gone back and forth on whether to go to WrestleCon. On one hand, there will never be a Wrestlemania closer to where I live, and as a wrestling fan, it feels like I should probably take in at least a sample of the carnival atmosphere. On the other, I didn’t really want to go. I’m never sure what to say at things like this. “Great wrestling you did many years ago, Arn, really superb”? I’m self-conscious at the best of times, and standing in front of, I don’t know, Sgt. Slaughter while he signs a picture is not necessarily the best of times.

Mark finally prevailed on me to go, partly because he said he’d drive to Stamford, where we could take the train into Manhattan. Mark is a good dude. He had a list of people he wanted to meet, and I had a list. We were going to do this. We were going to meet some old wrestlers and spend too much money and probably have to wear multiple wristbands.

We walked from Grand Central up to the Hilton on a beautiful spring day in Manhattan. I recommend this. You feel like you’re part of the great flux of modern humanity, strolling the New York streets, noticing things you’ve seen in movies or prestige television shows, wondering why the cops are blocking off the cross streets with bike racks. Was … was there a wrestling parade?

(No, thank God; a Scottish parade, it would later emerge.)

The Midtown Hilton is probably the nicest hotel WrestleCon will ever be held in. This is not to disparage hotels in New Orleans or Tampa or wherever, it’s just to say there’s a certain standard for Hilton hotels in Midtown Manhattan, and that standard is: high. I’m not sure what the non-wrestling guests thought about the thousands of people in black t-shirts wandering the halls, clutching shopping bags full of boxed action figures. Maybe they didn’t think anything of it; maybe they just assumed it was a New York thing. That’s what we thought when we saw a bunch of guys in kilts at Grand Central Station. Turns out they were in town for a parade.

Our first Wrestling Celebrity sighting of the day: Corey Graves and Renee Young, passing us on the escalator as they left WrestleCon. I wish I had made some kind of quip, or earnestly asked Corey to tell me the Rules of Punk, but I just kind of gawked. Story of my life, really. And now I’ll never know how to be a real punk rocker.

We were too late for Corey and Renee, but just in time for Pancakes & Piledrivers, entry to which came with our $35 tickets. The show was running late, and we both realized we didn’t want to stand around for another tardy indie show, so we saw, over the course of the morning, maybe three minutes of Pancakes and Piledrivers. On the bright side, it was packed. Lots of other people were ready for pancakes and, yes, piledrivers.

If you’ve been to any kind of fan convention, you know what this was like: big rooms (three in total) full of tables set up where you’d approach the celeb (or, you know, “celeb”), fork over some cash, and pose for a photo. There were also some vendor tables, but surprisingly, not too many of those. I was hoping for someone selling vintage memorabilia, but there were only a couple of action figure guys and one table selling inflatable hardcore match weapons (like, inflatable garbage cans and ladders … no, I don’t know, either).

This was a lot of fun, though, because there were so many famous wrestlers and wrestling-adjacent people that it felt like a cough-syrup dream you’d have after falling asleep in the midst of a chronological viewing of every Royal Rumble. Bill Apter! The Rock ‘n’ Roll Express! Sabu! Magnum TA just kind of hanging out! The woman who had the “Face Fuck Me Finn” sign at a Takeover a few years ago, who I would later discover now works as a wrestling manager!

This was not a typical fan convention where you’ll find, like, three or four wrestlers, one of whom is always Tony Atlas (although, to be sure, Tony Atlas was at WrestleCon). This was scores of wrestlers, including some really famous ones, all standing around, waiting to endure a meeting with you, the public.

Mark and I reasoned that we should probably track down the wrestlers who we imagined would have long lines first. This was a reasonable strategy, but as it turned out, none of the people we wanted to see had long lines. In some cases, no lines at all. Masato Tanaka? No line. Atsushi Onita? No line. Gail Kim? No line. Scott Steiner? No line. Arn Goddamn Anderson? NO. LINE.

Now, in some cases our timing was just good, showing up after a line had thinned out. But I was astonished, over the course of the day, at who had long lines and who did not. For the record, the longest lines:

Bret Hart (of course)

Shawn Michaels (sure)

Ric Flair (obviously)

Scott Hall (I guess)

Kevin Nash (fine)

Rob Van Dam (huh, OK)

Christian (eh)

Eva Marie (wait)

Enzo Amore (OH COME ON)

Rob Van Dam’s line never seemed to get shorter. It was insane. We were there for hours, and every time we’d pass the part of the hall where RVD was, there would be a huge line of people snaking around corners. Meanwhile, Sabu, the Sandman, and Francine were all standing around looking at their phones half the time. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I like Rob Van Dam. But if you’re going to wait in a long line, are you going to wait for the Whole F’n Show or are you going to wait for Ric Flair, who recently had a brush with death? Or Bret Hart, and you could ask him about his favorite subject, the Montreal Screwjob?

Sgt. Slaughter didn’t have a long line. Ricky Steamboat didn’t have a long line. Road Warrior Animal didn’t have a long line. I’m probably showing my age, but these dudes were big stars to me.

Jesse Ventura had a moderate line. Not as long as Eva Marie, who was right next to him. Mark got his picture with Ventura, and asked a question about “Predator” that delighted the former Minnesota governor, who talked about it so long that his minion taking the money hissed at me to move things along. Buddy: you go right ahead and tell Jesse Ventura to shut up.

That was the most memorable interaction we had over the course of the day. I made Scott Steiner chuckle with a joke about his match with Swoggle, but he could have just been polite. Mark had wanted to solve a Nitro Girl-related mystery (listen, inquiring minds wanted to know), and was able to talk to some of the Nitro Girls to get the straight scoop.

I did like watching the wrestlers interact. Sgt. Slaughter, wandering around because no one was in line for him, pretended to put Steamboat in the Cobra Clutch. “I never could get out of that hold,” Steamboat said. Arn Anderson came over to shoot the breeze with Ventura. Moose, who I don’t even think had a table there, excitedly came over to the Rock ‘n’ Roll Express to get his picture with Morton and Gibson. Mantaur is apparently really good friends with Billy Jack Haynes. The whole thing had the feel at times of a really weird class reunion, and I kind of wished there had been panels or something, where we could hear, say, Ventura and Arn and Ted DiBiase tell old road stories or something.

The crowd was pretty much what you’d expect: wrestling super fans from all over the world. Lots of different accents and languages being spoken. I didn’t really draw any incisive observations about our human family from any of this, other than to note that Vampiro didn’t seem to have a single non-Mexican fan come up to his table, but it was nice to be in a series of big rooms with people whose love of this goofy industry briefly transcended barriers that normally separate us. Also, lots of replica belts. So many replica belts.

In the end, I’m glad I went. I got to meet Gail Kim and Arn Anderson and Ultimo Dragon, among others, and it was a nice day in the big city. I’m also glad that from now on I will feel absolutely no pressure ever to attend another Wrestlemania weekend again.

[placetobenation]

30 Years in the making!

This year’s Survivor Series will not only be the Best of the Best, it will also be a time in which we put The Undertaker to rest. 30 years after making his debut as part of Ted DiBiase’s Survivor Series team, the Dead Man will give his final farewell to the WWE Universe.

Remember, it was The Undertaker replacing Bad News Brown as a member of The Million Dollar Team (The Honky Tonk Man, Greg Valentine, Ted DiBiase and The Undertaker with Brother Love, Jimmy Hart and Virgil) as they defeated The Dream Team (Bret Hart, Dusty Rhodes, Koko B. Ware and Jim Neidhart). It was The Undertaker eliminating Dusty Rhodes before getting counted out to end his debut.

Here’s hoping the WWE puts together an evening that’s deserving of the most decorated WWE Superstar of all-time. It has to be better than the 25 years of Triple H that they aired on SmackDown right? That one was funny but way too many inside jokes for a night honoring The Undertaker. 

Survivor Series – Updated Card:

WWE Champion Randy Orton vs. Universal Champion Roman Reigns

Raw Women’s Champion Asuka vs. SmackDown Women’s Champion Sasha Banks

Raw Tag Team Champions The New Day vs. SmackDown Tag Team Champions The Street Profits

United States Champion Bobby Lashley vs. Intercontinental Champion Sami Zayn

5-on-5 Women’s Survivor Series Elimination Match (RAW – Nia Jax, Shayna Baszler, Dana Brooke, Mandy Rose, Lana vs. Ruby Riott, Bianca Belair, TBD, TBD, TBD)

5-on-5 Men’s Survivor Series Elimination Match (Keith Lee, Sheamus, Braun Strowman, AJ Styles, TBD vs. Kevin Owens, Jey Uso, King Corbin, Seth Rollins, TBD)

Star of the Week:

They're back. @PeteDunneYxB @ONEYLORCAN & @strongstylebrit ATTACK @KillianDain & @WWEMaverick on #WWENXT!!! Also @PatMcAfeeShow is a camera operator now. pic.twitter.com/xQpU88LeWc

— WWE NXT (@WWENXT) November 5, 2020

Pat McAfee – The former Colts punter continues to make his mark on NXT. This week, McAfee and his newest faction of Pete Dunne, Danny Burch and Oney Lorcan took out Killian Dane & Drake Maverick while sending a burning message to The Undisputed Era. I’m looking forward to more from Mr. McAfee and friends!

RAW

RESULTS

Guitar on a Pole Match: Jeff Hardy defeated Elias

WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship Match: Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler defeated Mandy Rose & Dana Brooke to retain titles

Non-Title Match: Bobby Lashley defeated R-Truth

24/7 Match: Drew Gulak defeated R-Truth

Triple Threat Match for Survivor Series spot: Braun Strowman defeated Keith Lee & Sheamus to earn spot on Team RAW for Survivor Series

Nia Jax defeated Lana

Non-Title RAW Tag Team Championship Match: Cedric Alexander & Shelton Benjamin defeated The New Day

Ricochet defeated Tucker

2-on-1 Handicap Match: Drew McIntyre defeated The Miz & John Morrison

RKO OUTTA NOWHERE!!!#TheFiend is watching………..#WWERaw pic.twitter.com/xSZg8FWLXy

— WWE (@WWE) November 3, 2020

RAW is all about one storyline at this moment. It’s a trilogy as Randy Orton tries to take on a three-headed monster called Drew McIntyre, The Fiend and The Miz. Whether it’s the former WWE Champion, the diabolical Bray Wyatt with his whimsical sidekick Alexa Bliss or the Money In the Bank holder, The Miz, The Viper has to keep his head on a swivel these days. And we LOVE it. Give me chaos. Give me upheaval. Give me an uncertain rode each week with the strongest personalities on Monday night interwoven each Monday night. Plus, we get to throw Roman Reigns into the mix for Orton to for one night at Survivor Series. It’ll be interesting which way the WWE decides to go with this one.

What is disappointing though is the consistent use of The Miz as someone who is not strong at all. We just had the last month of The Miz talking how much better a contender to the WWE Championships than Otis was, yet here we go again with The Miz and John Morrison again proving folly for McIntyre, losing a 2-on-1 handicap match. The MITB contender should look strong is he’s going to be taken seriously to knock off Orton or Reigns.

7-TIMES, 7-TIMES, 7-TIMES, 7-TIMES, 7-TIMES, 7-TIMES, 7-TIMES!@NiaJaxWWE sends @LanaWWE crashing through the announce table on #WWERaw! pic.twitter.com/zuQrtxiEAJ

— WWE (@WWE) November 3, 2020

Lana. Tables. #7 and counting. Oh yeah, how clunky was the end of that Women’s Tag Team Title match? 

The pipes on @TrueKofi though…#TheNewDay squares off against The #HurtBusiness' @Sheltyb803 & @CedricAlexander NEXT on #WWERaw! pic.twitter.com/0Cu9KFamxp

— WWE (@WWE) November 3, 2020

Sure, I’ll take The New Day vs. The Hurt Business for a bit. These guys could bring it in and out of the ring. Strong promos are coming our way on Monday night! Speaking of The Hurt Business, I thought they missed an opportunity to groom R-Truth for a potential addition to the team. Lashley beat up R-Truth, quickly, and then threw Drew Gulak on top of him to take away his 24/7 Title. I thought Lashley was coming back in the ring to turn it around and have R-Truth regain the title, but it wasn’t meant to be. It would’ve been a good thing too, IMHO. R-Truth joining MVP and crew could be some comic relief and another edition to fight RETRIBUTION.

HERE COMES THE MACE. HERE COMES THE T-BAR. THE RETRIBUTION. TAKING OVER #WWERaw. pic.twitter.com/E1FRGl0RIi

— WWE Universe (@WWEUniverse) November 3, 2020

As for RETRIBUTION, what did Ricochet and Tucker ever do to them? Sure, bad ass RETRIBUTION, pick on RICOCHET, one of the smallest guys on the roster.

SWEARING in the #FireflyFunHouse?! Yowie wowie.#WWERaw @WWEBrayWyatt @AlexaBliss_WWE pic.twitter.com/SQmAqPmiDi

— WWE (@WWE) November 3, 2020

Finally, Alexa Bliss and the swear jar joining the Firefly Funhouse. YES! Bliss is on fire these days as a shining spotlight of Monday nights.

NXT

RESULTS

Dakota Kai defeated Ember Moon

KUSHIDA defeated Cameron Grimes

Drake Maverick & Killian Dain vs. Ever-Rise ended in no-contest

Toni Storm defeated Shotzi Blackheart

Tommaso Ciampa defeated The Velveteen Dream

First things first, NXT was another good show this week. As usual, it’s the best in-ring stuff on Wednesday nights and this week did not disappoint.

Every match, minus the tag team match delivered and you could argue that the Dain/Maverick vs. Ever-Rise match served its purpose as a no-contest giving Pat McAfee’s new faction the chance to beat up Dain & Maverick and give them a new foe in addition to The Undisputed Era. McAfee’s a beast on the mic already in his early NXT career. No matter the platform, he kills it!

The #WWENXT #WomensChampion 𝙞𝙨𝙣'𝙩 afraid of nightmares.@shirai_io wants @RheaRipley_WWE one-on-one! pic.twitter.com/xrZzCg1HTT

— WWE (@WWE) November 5, 2020

What I didn’t like though was the constant use of distraction to end matches. In the opening match of the night, Raquel Gonzalez distracts the ref to let Dakota Kai get the pin on Ember Moon. Then, to interrupt a very good Shotzi Blackheart vs. Toni Storm match, Candice LeRae runs over Blackheart’s beloved tank. Sure, I get the storyline of revenge for LeRae to get back at Shotzi for interfering in his championship match vs. Io Shirai last week on Halloween Havoc, but it took away from a really good match. I’m thinking Storm joins forces with Shotzi to take on LeRae and Miss Scream Indie Hartwell down the road too. That should be fun!

.@CandiceLeRae has DESTROYED @ShotziWWE's TANK!!

#WWENXT pic.twitter.com/gaHGNV1rj6

— WWE (@WWE) November 5, 2020

Poor tank!

.@JohnnyGargano, #WWENXT #NorthAmericanChampion & lover of wheels, will defend his championship NEXT WEEK!

Ghostface pic.twitter.com/XKjd9agF8c

— WWE (@WWE) November 5, 2020

KUSHIDA continues to impress, but I’ve got one gripe. Wasn’t he getting the edge as a heel? Suddenly, he’s clapping and getting cheered against Cameron Grimes? I’d rather see him keep the nastiness.

𝒜 𝐹𝒶𝒾𝓇𝓎𝓉𝒶𝓁𝑒 𝐸𝓃𝒹𝒾𝓃𝑔 for @NXTCiampa, and a 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐞 for @DreamWWE. Tommaso Ciampa picks up the victory in a BRUTAL one-on-one encounter on #WWENXT! pic.twitter.com/SmLvIOdZlP

— WWE (@WWE) November 5, 2020

Tommaso Ciampa is non-stop action. So, he feels like NXT isn’t quite the same these days? Well, what better way to start to get things back in sync than to take out The Velveteen Dream and his me-first persona.  It’s a fairy tale ending for TVD to end the night! Who’s next on Ciampa’s radar?

SMACKDOWN

RESULTS

SmackDown Women’s Championship Match: Sasha Banks defeated Bayley

Survivor Series Qualifying Match: King Corbin defeated Rey Mysterio

Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Ruby Riott defeated Natalya & Zelina Vega

Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Seth Rollins defeated Otis

Jey Uso defeated Kevin Owens

S T I L L #SmackDown Women's Champ: @SashaBanksWWE! pic.twitter.com/MheWeJK3uE

— WWE on FOX (@WWEonFOX) November 7, 2020

Welcome back, @CarmellaWWE! #SmackDown pic.twitter.com/dnOq8heHS6

— WWE on FOX (@WWEonFOX) November 7, 2020

If this was the end to the Banks vs. Bayley feud, and no I don’t think it is, it was one hell of a finale! Given nearly a half hour to start Friday night SmackDown, they tore the house down again! Banks retains her title but gets a face full of Carmella as The Untouchable One returns to the blue brand to stake her claim to the Women’s Title. I wonder what Bayley thinks of all this. Things could get even more interesting.

King @BaronCorbinWWE is headed to #SurvivorSeries *remembers what King Corbin did last year*

pic.twitter.com/IW3eE8yxf5

— WWE on FOX (@WWEonFOX) November 7, 2020

On the Survivor Series front, King Corbin and Seth Rollins have joined Team SmackDown. Rollins got a little surprising help from Murphy in distracting Otis to give the Messiah the win. But alas things are exactly how they appear says Murphy to his new love, Aalyah.

"I need you to trust me." #SmackDown @WWE_Murphy pic.twitter.com/nOseYmqVfw

— WWE (@WWE) November 7, 2020

For the women, Ruby Riott claims an unlikely spot on Team SmackDown, joining Bianca Belair on the blue team. Where’s Naomi? Where was Belair this week? And yes, I need more of Big E and The Street Profits than just a cameo with Billie Kay.

So, how many parts is this Lars Sullivan interview? Does he need a different interviewer each week too? Freakish indeed.

Jey @WWEUsos did what he had to do to pick up the win tonight on #SmackDown…@FightOwensFight @HeymanHustle pic.twitter.com/BHkXj7EZJZ

— WWE (@WWE) November 7, 2020

It wasn’t as dramatic as the past few weeks, but we get another chapter of the family drama as Roman Reigns joins Jey Uso in putting Kevin Owens in his place after Owens mocked Uso earlier in the night. A very heelish victory for Uso – distraction, low blow, big splash! It’s a step forward in uniting the Tribal Chief’s reign over all his relatives. It also further plants the seeds of dissention on Team SmackDown between Owens and Uso as well.

After a couple of months of being the standard show of the WWE week, SmackDown was still very good, not great. After all, we’ve come to expect greatness these days on Friday night.

Parting Shots:

Paul Heyman as the new co-host of Talking Smack? Interesting. If he keeps bringing the shoot style realism that he brought the past few weeks as a guest to his new co-hosting duties, well just sign me up!

Coming up this week:

RAW: A Moment of Bliss: Drew McIntyre guest Second Chance Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Riddle vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Elias

NXT: NXT North American Championship Match: Johnny Gargano vs. TBD NXT Tag Team Championship Match: Oney Lorcan & Danny Burch vs. Breezango

SMACKDOWN: Survivor Series Qualifying continues / Go Home Show

Thanks for letting us share our thoughts! Shoot me an email at jcrowe567@gmail.com. We’d love to hear your comments and suggestions! You can also check out my blog, The Crowe’s Nest as we delve into more pro wrestling, sports entertainment and the World of Sports. My apologies ahead of time – I AM a Patriots, Red Sox, Celtics and Bruins fan! If you’re not down with that, I’ve got TWO WORDS for you… NEW ENGLAND

[the-psydelicrainbow-kinhelpcafe]

Hi! Irwin R Schyster (WWE) here. I’m looking for a few people, but mainly the “Million Dollar Man”, Ted DiBiase. He was my best friend. Also, I’m looking for any other wrestlers from the 80’s and 90’s. I was autistic in my canon, and I’m autistic too. And I’m 17, so no one 19 or older, please. Interact with this and I’ll send you an ask on anon. I’m too nervous not to, sorry! And thanks! -I.R.S. out. 💼

Oh if you can give me a blog link so people could come to you for this please send it to me

Thank you and have a great day!!

-Mod Hobbes🌈 (Shift: Minky Momo💝🌈)

[findthebae]

Hi! Irwin R Schyster (WWE) here. I’m looking for a few people, but mainly the “Million Dollar Man”, Ted DiBiase. He was my best friend. Also, I’m looking for any other wrestlers from the 80’s and 90’s. I was autistic in my canon, and I’m autistic too. And I’m 17, so no one 19 or older, please. Thanks! -I.R.S. out. 💼

Oh! I forgot to say, but to whoever interacts with my call: I’m too nervous not to talk through anon asks. Sorry about that!   - I.R.S. out. 💼

[daleisgreat]

Randy Savage Unreleased: The Unseen Matches of the Macho Man

Freak out, freak out, oh yeahhhhh…..sorry I could not resist, but kicking off an entry with that iconic catchphrase means it is time to cover a Macho Man home video collection. In 2018 WWE gave Macho Man the ‘Unreleased’ DVD treatment, a line of several DVD match collections containing entirely never before released on home video matches. I already covered one on here several months ago dedicated to Hulk Hogan, so it would only seem appropriate to cover another one dedicated to his Mega Powers partner, Randy Savage. Like the Hogan DVD, it has a gratuitously long title in the form of Randy Savage Unreleased: The Unseen Matches of the Macho Man (trailer). If you are into these ‘Unreleased’ sets, then check back here later this year as there are two other semi-recent installments I plan on knocking out by the end of this year. Randy Savage Unreleased is jacked with content at three discs tallying up nine hours of material. There is a total of 41 (!!) matches and 9 promos spanning Macho’s career in WWF and WCW from 1985 through 1999. Also interspersed every several matches is one of 10 newly recorded panel discussion segments with Corey Graves, Bayley, Sean Mooney and Diamond Dallas Page. The panel discussions are not throwaway one-to-minute quick takes, but instead each are nearly several minutes each where all four panelists reminisce about each stage of Macho’s career with Mooney and Page both having pivotal on-hand accounts for how Savage was at that point backstage too. Page has detailed memories of his classic WCW rivalry with Randy and recounts a story I was all ears for about a voice mail he left for Macho on Thanksgiving. Hearing Bayley’s love for Randy was an interesting perspective to take in since she states she was not aware of him until his WCW years. Corey Graves’ passion for the 1993-as-hell Macho Man rap music video rubbed off on me as I never saw it before this collection and I will link to it here so you can have it forever imprinted into your mind as well.

Obviously I am not going to dissect each and every one of the 41 matches included here, but I will point out some highlights. In general, the quality of matches is fairly solid, and even though a fair amount of the first nine matches are in Macho’s early years with mostly quick, dominant encounters they were still a delight to watch his character evolve from coming out with a cape to adding in his vintage 80s bandana and ring robe and seeing his then-wife Miss Elizabeth join his side. Some early things that caught my eye were Macho’s first TV match in June of 1985 against Aldo Marino where the hype of Randy being the ‘hottest free agent’ attracted all of WWF’s managers to ringside to scout him in action. One of Jesse Ventura’s few WWF matches is here where he tags with Macho Man shortly before he succumbed to a career-ending injury not too long after signing with the WWF. I dug Savage’s first matches on here against formidable competition like former tag champ and Mark Henry manager, Tony Atlas and unearthing a high quality 1986 WWF match against the hidden gem of 80s WWF enhancement talent in one Scott McGhee. When it shifts into his Intercontinental title run, there is a good rematch included with Ricky Steamboat that had a red hot crowd and countless near falls and another good match against Steamboat where he teamed up with Honky Tonk Man against Steamboat and Hogan. His WWF Title run era features must-see WrestleMania-rematches against Ted Dibiase and Hulk Hogan.

Of all of Randy Savage’s flamboyant ring attires, the one I fondly remember the most was his over-the-top cowboy hat and full body attire complete with tassels. I had no idea until going through this collection that he started rocking that classic look midway through his two year run as the ‘Macho King’ with Queen Sherri by his side. The only notable match in this collection from that run is another WrestleMania-rematch with the mixed tag bout with Macho King and Sherri against Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire. There are nearly a dozen matches from Savage’s final few years in WWF after his reinstatement, but only three truly standout. One is a unique trios pairing that has Randy teaming with Piper and Jim Duggan against Ric Flair, Undertaker and Jake the Snake, while the other is another tag bout with Randy teaming with the Dead Man to take on Ric Flair and Berzerker. Seeing the chemistry between Savage and Undertaker was something special to say the least. Lastly, Savage has a heck of a bout with a post-Red Rooster, Terry Taylor in one of the better technical matches on the set. There are a few key WCW matches to point out in here from the eight included. One is where he is part of the teaming with the Hulkster against the Dungeon of Doom and hitting all the classic Mega Powers spots, including hitting an elbow on Hogan to wake him up after he succumbed to a sleeperhold. There is an awesome Nitro match on here against Ric Flair…which has a cruddy finish unfortunately, but everything else leading up to it is the best wrestling in this entire set. The most peculiar match on here is Savage wrestling on a C-tier weekend morning WCW show, {Pro} where he takes on Kurasawa and has Hulk Hogan by his side too in a strange twist. I am guessing Savage and Hogan must be tight with Kurasawa because these two were making huge money for limited dates in WCW and to have both of them appear in this weekend morning show match is a head scratcher…..it would be kind of like tuning in to Main Event now and seeing Brock Lesnar wrestling. The final match in the set was a surprisingly delightful schmoz of a mixed tag match with Savage and Madusa teaming up with Ric Flair and “Lil Naitch” himself, Charles Robinson! I expected the worst going in considering this was in 19990 when WCW was beginning its downward ratings spiral in its last couple years, but the four pull off a lot of entertaining spots and salvaged a heck of a performance.

Randy Savage Unreleased is a fairly strong compilation of matches and promos from Macho Man. I would say about a third of it is skippable, and there are a few teases of intriguing match-ups that wrapped up far too quick thanks to poor booking, like a WCW contest against Curt Hennig for example. I have no idea why there were two ho-hum matches against Mr. Hughes included either. That is almost to be expected of these ‘Unreleased’ collections, and seeing Savage’s character, moveset, attire and personality evolve from beginning to end is also fascinating in and of itself. I am glad we got a fair smattering of vintage Macho Man promos throughout his career, with his campaigning reinstatement speech and the aforementioned music video standing out the most of the bunch. Having a break from the 41 matches with the occasional promo and panel discussion segments are appreciated breathers from the action, and the panelists all bring a lot of classic Macho Man stories and memories to the table. This all adds up to Randy Savage Unreleased: The Unseen Matches of the Macho Man being a must-see for any Randy Savage aficionado.

Past Wrestling Blogs Best of WCW Clash of Champions Best of WCW Monday Nitro Volume 2 Best of WCW Monday Nitro Volume 3 Biggest Knuckleheads Bobby The Brain Heenan Daniel Bryan: Just Say Yes Yes Yes DDP: Positively Living Dusty Rhodes WWE Network Specials ECW Unreleased: Vol 1 ECW Unreleased: Vol 2 ECW Unreleased: Vol 3 Eric Bishoff: Wrestlings Most Controversial Figure Fight Owens Fight: The Kevin Owens Story For All Mankind Goldberg: The Ultimate Collection Hulk Hogans Unreleased Collectors Series Impact Wresting Presents: Best of Hulk Hogan Its Good to Be the King: The Jerry Lawler Story The Kliq Rules Ladies and Gentlemen My Name is Paul Heyman Legends of Mid South Wrestling Macho Man: The Randy Savage Story Memphis Heat NXT: From Secret to Sensation NXT Greatest Matches Vol 1 OMG Vol 2: Top 50 Incidents in WCW History OMG Vol 3: Top 50 Incidents in ECW History Owen: Hart of Gold RoH Supercard of Honor 2010-Present ScoobyDoo Wrestlemania Mystery Scott Hall: Living on a Razors Edge Shawn Michaels: My Journey Sting: Into the Light Straight Outta Dudley-ville: Legacy of the Dudley Boyz Straight to the Top: Money in the Bank Anthology Superstar Collection: Zach Ryder Then Now Forever – The Evolution of WWEs Womens Division TLC 2017 TNA Lockdown 2005-2016 Top 50 Superstars of All Time Tough Enough: Million Dollar Season True Giants Ultimate Fan Pack: Roman Reigns Ultimate Warrior: Always Believe War Games: WCWs Most Notorious Matches Warrior Week on WWE Network Wrestlemania III: Championship Edition Wrestlemania 28-Present The Wrestler (2008) Wrestling Road Diaries Too Wrestling Road Diaries Three: Funny Equals Money Wrestlings Greatest Factions WWE Network Original Specials First Half 2015 WWE Network Original Specials Second Half 2015 WWE Network Original Specials First Half 2016 WWE Network Original Specials Second Half 2016 WWE Network Original Specials First Half 2017

[amplesalty]

Day 5 - Saving Christmas (2017)

On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me.

FIVE SIDED RING!!!! No, wait...four. GOD DAMNIT!

No, sadly not a remake of the modern day Kirk Cameron classic. Why does Christmas need saving all the damn time? It needs to become empowered so it can save itself once in a while.

Anyway, with this and the Halloween movies, I tend to keep a wordpad document where I will note down any interesting sounding movies I come across so I might watch them in future years. Apparently I must have added this last year but I have no earthly idea where I picked it up from, probably that message board. It's always a bit weird going back through that list a year or two down the line with no context so I have no idea what these things are or how I found them in the first place. Like, spoiler for some future year, I have 3615 code Père Noël on the list but just looking on that makes me think I've copied some weird HTML code somehow.

The only note I've made on that entire list, outside of just film names, is on this noting 'Mike and Maria Bennett'. So clearly again I'm having to make my own way in the world of Christmas/wrestling mashups since WWE still isn't bothering. Still, Becky Lynch was just in that new Marine sequel so that might be neat. And Luke Harper was in one of their movies at the start of the year. I still can't believe Ted DiBiase Jr of all people was in The Marine 2. That guy always seemed so utterly devoid of charisma.

The Bennetts are just the tip of the iceberg though, as this credits roll shows. Tommy Dreamer, Matt Striker AND Gangrel?! Hell yes. Though, who casts Gangrel in a kids movie, honestly? I'm sure he has a...questionable filmography, shall we say. He directed porn, right? I'm assuming directed, I can't imagine someone casting him as a performer...

As an aside, can we all take a moment to appreciate the wonderful wonderful power ballad that is Mike and Maria Kanellis' WWE theme?

Also, as part of the credits, we learn that we're in Norepole, Maine. This both makes me confused for half the movie when I'm unsure if people are saying North Pole or Norepole,  and also worried about what supernatural events are going to go down. It's a possessed wrestling title and it's murdering everyone!

Let's try and get through the dull part of the movie which is pretty much the entire first hour. We have a bunch of kids that seem to be directly ripping off Ghosbusters, trying to track down a trap a ghost, whilst also dabbling in a little testing of psychic abilities. Though, I think this kid has a genuine interest in the subject. Venkman was probably just doing it for grant money, chicks or both.

Only, Douchebag McGee turns up with his hanger on to hassle our gang here. For as bad as this movie is, they at least foreshadow this one kids later betrayal by having him shut his camera off and not even take the footage to any of the teachers to rat on the bully. That or he's just following the code of the schoolyard.

Ooooh, he threw the kids science report in the bin. Real badass over here. Well, he does take it a bit too far by insulting the kids dead father. Again, just the tip of the iceberg though, we'll come back to this.

Meanwhile, we have a budget Rob Lowe over here who rocks up to a lady's salon for a hair cut. He has a cute little dog with him though so one suspects he's here for the women. It's certainly not for a haircut, $25 he pays and his hair looks literally the same for the rest of the movie.

He works for the big toy factory in town under 'Rick', played by Edward Asner. Man, that guy is old and he's still racking up credits left, right and centre. Surprise, he's actually Santa. But he feels too old and crotchety to be Santa. Where's the heart? Where's the love?!

As part of their supernatural fixation, the kids focus on a new task: to prove Santa is real. Well, it's partially for SCIENCE and partially because his little sister has become so jaded towards Christmas. After her Dad died, how could a terrible world such as this deserve something as lovely as Christmas? This must be the world's most miserable 8 year old.

Unfortunately, little Danny's belief that Santa is caught on film by soon to be former friend Jake, who gives it to the bully who plasters it all over...'Friendsbook'. I love when movies and TV shows have to come up with fake versions of social media. Friendsbook seems too sappy to ever get over. Defintely a step down from the less subtle 'Mybook' or 'Facespace'. Danny's friend pretty clearly says Facebook as well so I dunno if they had some rights issue or something that they had to sub in the visual stuff last minute? Billion dollar company and that's what your app looks like? State of it...

Back at the salon, Sammy's attempts to bang Danny's mom have now racked him up $50 in hair cut fees and he's still not had anything in the way of restyling. 24 hour bed head, that guy.

As part of the kids efforts to track down Santa, I can't believe this is a spoken like in this movie, Danny says he 'hacked the Norepole Mall database and got a list of mall Santa's from the past decade.' He also later claims that he has free reign over the toy company's security cameras but can only shutdown their security network for 9 minutes. Clearly having access to a laptop is all that it takes to be a 1337 haxor in Hollywood. One of those is now the promoter of the wrestling show in town, the XWA. If you guessed that the X stands for XTREME, ding ding ding! A winner is you!

The kids however are a little distracted by marking out over Matt Taven. Come on, he's not even good enough to get in the opening credits! Or a close up. The promoter basically tells them that he enjoyed putting smiles on everyone's faces as Santa so that's what lead him to the wrestling biz. I feel there's definitely a parallel to be drawn between Christmas and wrestling. They're both still real to me, damnit!

Sammy explains everything to Danny's mom, that being that he is actually working the real actual Santa Claus who needs a makeover. If only for the sake of plot convenience, she readily accepts this rather than running in the opposite direction. Apparently back in the day, his company and 'a very popular soda company' (he did the air quotes and everything) put Santa on the map but it's the 21st century now. As Sammy puts it, enough is enough and it's time for a change! Firstly, I knew it! You lied to me, Snopes dot com. Coca Cola did invent Santa! Secondly, it's alright Sammy, we know Santa is not a nugget. This is all well and good but I sense a problem with dressing Santa in jorts considering the time of year he has to work. Guy looks like a more urban Hugh Hefner.

If we give Santa a hip new makeover and have him turn up at the XWA Gingerbread Brawl, it could result in the most lkes, shares and retweets of all time! That's a pretty good name, it's no Seasons Beatings or Fabulous February Fight Fest but still, pretty good. And, as for the most retweets? I'm pretty sure you have to be begging for a lifetime supply of nugs to get that title.

We've now come to the best part of the movie, hands down. Danny and his sister are walking home from school. As an end of term assignment, she had to create something based around the one thing she could have for Christmas. So, she makes a memory box full of photos and mementos of her departed Father. That's odd, why did they take the time to have an establishing shot of a wood chipper? I sure this isn't ominous in the slightest.

The bully soon comes into frame. His latest plan is to steal all the evidence that Danny and co have been compiling on the whereabouts of Santa so that he can claim all the credit himself. He figures that box must have everything in it so promptly takes it. But rather than just run off with it, he takes the odd decision to kick it into the air....oh no.

Oh God! The whole thing unfolds in slow motion, a sorrowful song drowns out everything but the dull roar of wood chipper on cardboard action, as Danny's sister breaks down in tears and the bully is in tears of laughter. This is played like the death of Bambi's mother and Mufasa all rolled into one and my God is it beautiful. Danny on the other hand, he doesn't take kindly to this and promptly lays the Smacketh-down on the bully like he's Ralphie Parker on ol' Yellow Eyes.

Right, now that's out of the way, it's time for your main event! Maria Kanellis makes he showstopping, 15 second appearance to recite The Night Before Christmas to a packed locker room of all of 4 people.

Why is Tommy Dreamer on play-by-play?!

And why do your tickets say WXE despite the fact you're clearly the XWA?

I like how in a podunk town of 3,000 people, Matt Striker still has to play as the backstage interviewer. And rather than the Vampire Warrior that we are accustomed to, Gangrel now appears to be a viking called Tucker Von Magnus. Fantastic. You know how Matt Striker would always come up with those stupid names for people? Like Yoshi Tatsu was the Poison Fist of the Pacific Rim? Let's brain storm one for Vampire Viking over here, let's make this a thing.

By the way, isn't it weird that WWE had to license out the name Gangrel from Vampire: The Masquerade? A very odd collision of worlds there.

You know that whole 'Card subject to change' thing? Yeaaaaaaaaah, about that. Turns out Max Miracle (Mike Bennett) had a little motorbike accident and now can't wrestle anymore. But don't worry, he'll defend his title at January Jam! Pre-order your tickets now! Didn't you learn anything from Bret Hart?!

Holy shit, nuclear heat for this. Tommy tries to to calm the crowd down but they are having none of it. As far as I'm concerned, all of this crap in the ring represents these fans out here!

"Uh-oh, and a flying soda to the eye now rendering Tommy Dreamer partially blind." "Wow, this....this truly is a black day for the XWA."

Well, either that or, knowing Tommy Dreamer, he’s probably just crying over something.

Nevermind that, Max Miracle's replacement is non other than Santa freakin' Claus! The bully isn't buying it though and promptly jumps the rail, grabs a mic and cuts a promo on the guy. I say jumps the rail, more like takes a step to the side around the rail. How do we know this is the real Santa?

Well, for one thing, the real Santa can fly. Tommy Dreamer can't believe his one good eye.

Also, the real Santa can magically teleport Max Miracle from his home to the middle of the ring, bad foot and all. Crowd goes banana for this, including one dad who even draws a skeptical look from his daughter. She's like 'Jeez, Dad. Calm down, it's only Michael Bennett.' They act like he's a mega babyface but the guy signed his own cast earlier! What a narcissist.

All it takes is for Santa to lay his healing hands on that cast though and all is well and Max can take on the challenge of the Viking and his evil manager. This is the part I'm calling bullshit on. I didn't sit through nearly an hour and a half of this garbage to sit through a Mike Bennett vs Gangrel match, I wanted Santa vs Gangrel!

Max goes over with, of all things, a suplex and then scoop slamming the manager on top of Gangrel for the pin. Not even a Brainbuster, just a bog standard suplex. What is this, the 80's? Minus 5 stars! Still, probably the only televised victory he’s had within the past year.

[scheduledfor1fall]

Raw 2/1/93 Review

Raw starts off with the opening sequence, followed by some stereotypical war cries. That can only mean Tatanka! Already in the ring is Damien Demento, whose greatest feats so far are losing to Undertaker in the main event of the first Raw, and being in the 1993 Royal Rumble. Thus begins our opening match:

 TATANKA DEF. DAMIEN DEMENTO BY PINFALL VIA SAMOAN DROP:

 Very standard TV match that’s really not worth rating. Tatanka looked perfectly fine here, and was fairly over. Demento had the Baron Corbin gimmick of talking incessantly throughout the match, and I believe one thing he kept mumbling was “the Indian will suffer.” Yikes. I should also point out that near the end of the match, there were some noticeable “we want Flair” chants. Oh, those New Yorkers and their wacky little chants.

 We cut to a clip from a Madison Square Garden house show the previous Friday, done for the “Headlock on Hunger” promotion. WWF Champion Bret Hart is seen carrying a comically large check made out to the Red Cross to the ring and presenting on behalf of everyone in the WWF.

 Cut to the ring, as Vince McMahon introduces “one of the all-time greats in the WWF, Brutus Beefcake.” The generosity of that description is staggering, but the people are very supportive of Beefcake, making his in-ring return after having his facial skeleton devastated in a parasailing accident. Beefcake announces his intent to return to in-ring action. Vince expresses his concern due to Beefcake having his face reconstructed, a very valid concern, at that. Beefcake explains that before his accident, his parents had died within a short time of each other, and his wife had divorced him. Then the accident happened. Beefcake claims he was at the end of his rope, when his best friend Hulk Hogan reached out to him. Beefcake describes how Hogan was there during his surgery, and even while he was getting his bandages removed. Beefcake credits Hogan with inspiring his comeback, and says he’ll take on all comers. A decent interview segment here. I’m not really sure how much of it was authentic and how much of it was kayfabe, but Beefcake’s delivery was pretty convincing, and people seemed to react positively to Hogan being mentioned.

 We’re back to the ring where a couple of big hosses are on the apron and a ring girl is walking about holding a sign that says “Raw and Order,” and “Steak tartare is Raw.” Growing pains, everyone. Out comes Koko B. Ware and Owen Hart, High Energy, for this tag team match.

 HIGH ENERGY DEF. SKULL VON KRUSH AND “IRON” MIKE SHARPE BY PINFALL VIA AIDED DROPKICK:

 Short match that showcased High Energy’s, well, high energy. I think this may have been one of their last matches as a team, however, as Cagematch.Net lists their last match being at a house show against the Headshrinkers in early March.

 Back to ringside, as Vince plugs our feature match-up, Typhoon vs. Doink the Clown. Thrilling. We get a clip of Doink hitting Crush with a prosthetic arm, which caused him to miss out on the Royal Rumble match, though Vince says he will return sometime in the next few weeks. Out first is Doink, and I’ve got to say, I love his scary circus heel theme song. Out next is Typhoon, as we get to our feature match.

 DOINK THE CLOWN DEF. TYPHOON BY PINFALL VIA FLYING CLOTHESLINE AND PULLING THE TIGHTS:

 Pretty one-sided match in Doink’s favor. Amusingly, people are starting to cheer Doink, and I’m sure in turning him face, the WWF wouldn’t do anything too cartoonish and ridiculo….

  Well, so much for that. No cool heel Doink for those guys.

 We get a commercial for WWF Mania, and a plug by noted dweeb Todd Pettengill, who advertise Giant Gonzalez will be on the show. Back to the ring, as Howard Finkel mentions the recent passing of Andre the Giant. A 10-bell salute starts, as various pictures of Andre throughout his career are shown. I believe this was one of the first 10-bell salutes done on TV. A classy move by the company who would later go on to honor Andre by making him the first member of the Hall of Fame, among other tributes. After a few commercials, Royal Rumble winner Yokozuna comes out for his match against Bobby DeVito.

 YOKOZUNA DEF. BOBBY DEVITO BY PINFALL VIA BONZAI DROP:

 Very short match that saw Yoko bounce around the poor guy. During the match, they did the insufferable phone call gimmick mid-match, with Jim Duggan calling in to discuss his upcoming match with Yokozuna. Duggan, who at times sounded like a drunk Barney Rubble, repeatedly referred to his opponent as “Yakazuma,” and kept cutting in and out, promising to knock Yakazuma off his feet. I really hope they drop this stupid-ass call-in idea very soon, as the quality of these call-ins is not something that reflects well on what’s supposed to be a cutting edge new wrestling show.

 Vince McMahon welcomes the WWF Tag Team Champions, Money Inc. to ringside. DiBiase runs down Brutus Beefcake for putting out an open challenge, as he and IRS flip a coin to decide who will face the Barber. DiBiase wins the coin flip, and out comes their manager Jimmy Hart, wearing a sweet airbrushed jacket. Jimmy chastises them for wasting their time on Beefcake, but DiBiase dismisses his concerns, and promises to reinjure Beefcake, saying he knows just where to target him. IRS then cuts a promo on how Beefcake is no better than the crowd for not paying his taxes due to his doctor’s bills. I really do love the one-dimensional, tax-based promos from IRS, and I’m already begging for another one next week. Jimmy leads them to the back, as it seems there’s trouble in paradise for Money Inc.

 Back to the ring, as a large ring is set up in the middle of the ring. Lex Luger comes out and poses in front of the mirror. Oh, cool. I guess the WBF is back. For some reason, a rather large ring girl enters the ring, and Lex starts pitching a fit. Back from commercial, and Luger is continuing to scream. We get a vignette with Steve Jordan, a former tight-end from my Minnesota Vikings. Jordan introduces us to the “perfect passer,” Mr. Perfect, who throws some passes, including one which he ends up catching himself. We get back to action, as Luger takes on Jason Knight, better known as simply Jason in ECW.

 LEX LUGER DEF. JASON KNIGHT BY PINFALL VIA LARIAT AND PINKY:

 Yes, Luger does in fact pin Knight with just his pinky after a very short match. During the match, they announced that Brutus Beefcake vs. Ted DiBiase has been made official for the following episode of Raw.

 Post-match, Luger does a short Giant Swing on an unconscious Knight. Back from commercial, as Vince reminds us that Raw will not air on February 8th due to the pressing matter of the Westminster Dog Show. Oh yeah, I forgot that was ever a thing. Vince plugs a 16-man battle royal and DiBiase vs. Beefcake for the February 15th episode of Raw, and teases Rob Bartlett, who’s been bitching about getting a nickname and an action figure throughout the show, as an entrant. Dear God, no.

 OVERALL THOUGHTS:

 When the feature attraction of this show is Doink the Clown vs. Typhoon, there’s really not much to expect here. Amazingly, they managed to fit 5 matches and two interview segments in here, but the show doesn’t really amount to much on it’s own. The one thing worth checking out might be the Brutus Beefcake promo, as he did have some pretty good delivery, and did lead to the Hulkster’s brief 93 run in the WWF. Otherwise, I’d recommend skipping this show.  

[junker-town]

8 sports video games that need to be on the SNES Classic

The NES Classic was the must-have holiday item of 2016. A mix of nostalgia and being just plain cool caused retailers to sell out immediately after receiving their shipment. Months later people are still looking to get their hands on one.

Now Eurogamer is reporting that a “SNES mini” is on the way from Nintendo — a small version of the Super Nintendo which will include Super Mario World, Donkey Kong Country, The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past and more. The final list of games hasn’t been released, but here are ___ sports games we hope make the final version.

NBA Jam: Tournament Edition

There are going to be some arguments on whether you go with original NBA Jam or Tournament Edition here, but I think you have to go with TE. Either way you’re dealing with old rosters, but TE added the following players:

Charles Barkley

Gary Payton

Penny Hardaway

Chris Webber

Toni Kukoc

The AI is better too and the computer is more aggressive on defense. It’s got to be this version.

Ken Griffey Jr. Presents Major League Baseball

This is THE baseball game. It’s timeless, it’s perfection. Over the years so many baseball games have been released, but none come close to Griffey. This game is so good that MLB The Show tried to replicate its style in 2017 just because people love it so much.

It’s that mixture of arcade and simulation that makes it sublime. Also the fictitious players in the game are incredible and worth reading.

True Golf Classics: Waialae Country Club

This was the quintessential “rent from the video store and get frustrated” game. It was a incredibly good recreation of golf on the SNES and this is absolutely the game dads played on the SNES.

The only weird thing about True Golf Classics: Waialae Country Club was the utter silence you played golf in, until you finished a hole. Well, that and the “select a caddy” screen.

WWF Royal Rumble

Oh man this game was so friggin’ good. Wrestling games might not have reached their zenith until the N64 with WCW vs. nWo and WWF No Mercy but for it’s day nothing was better than WWF Royal Rumble. It’s roster is pure nostalgia, it’s still a pretty decent looking game and I need to play this again.

Fun fact: The SNES and Genesis versions of this game were different. The SNES version had Ric Flair, Mr. Pefect, Ted DiBiase, Yokozuna and Tatanka in it, while Genesis got Hulk Hogan, IRS, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, “The Model” Rick Martel and Papa Shango.

We know who came out ahead.

NBA Live ‘95

I can’t begin to tell you how many hours of NBA Live ‘95 I played. The game was so dang right. I always played as the Bulls where a mysterious played called “No.23” was the best dude in the game by a mile. Michael Jordan didn’t license himself out to video games, but Live 95 was the first time I can remember being able to edit players and make him actual Michael Jordan and it felt like magic.

Jimmy Connors Pro Tennis Tour

Called simply Pro Tennis Tour in Japan, the game was branded with Jimmy Connors for the US — otherwise we wouldn’t like it or something. This was a purely perfect pick up and play tennis game that was so great to play.

Also it makes me realize it’s been entirely too long since we had a good tennis video game.

NHL Stanley Cup

The EA Sports NHL series are definitely better games, but this thing felt like wizardry the first time you saw it. 3D graphics were a pretty new thing in 1993 when it was released, and the close-up ice view was so good.

Madden ‘94

Finally we’ve got to get a football game in here and we’ll go with the most nostalgic one possible. Madden ‘94 is the game where Bills fans can kick your ass, and they’ve waited to long for that in video games.

Plus you get this intro with John Madden making the weirdest dang faces in the world.

He’s like one of those singing big-mouth bass things you stick on the wall.

* * *

Yes, I know none of these will ever happen. There are too many developers and licenses involved for this to be a reality — but we can dream anyway.

In 2016 we celebrated the SNES’ 25th birthday by appreciating these sports games, some of which didn’t make the cut here today. Are there any sports games you absolutely think need to be on this list?

[placetobenation]

*** Scott & JT’s Vintage Vault Refresh reviews are a chronological look back at WWE PPV and TV history that began with a review of WrestleMania I. The PICs have revisited these events and refreshed all of their fun facts that provide insight into the match, competitors and state of the company as well as their overviews of the match action and opinions and thoughts on the outcomes. In addition, Jeff Jarvis assists in compiling historical information and the Fun Facts in each of the reviews. Also, be sure to leave feedback on the reviews at our Facebook page. Enjoy! ***

Monday Night Raw #127

September 18, 1995 (Taped August 28, 1995) Canton Civic Center Canton, OH Announcers: Vince McMahon & Jerry Lawler

Monday Night War Report: WCW Monday Nitro this week takes place one night after WCW’s Fall Brawl PPV, emanating from Freedom Hall in Johnson City, TN. The results were as followed: 1) Marcus Alexander Bagwell & Scotty Riggs defeated WCW World Tag Team Champions Harlem Heat (w/ Sister Sherri) to win the Tag Titles (4:40); 2) Paul Orndorff pinned Johnny B. Badd (6:40); 3) Ric Flair defeated Brian Pillman via submission (5:24). Raw would rebound after last week’s loss to squeak out a win this week, 2.5 to 2.4.

Head-to-Head Ratings Scorecard: Nitro 1 – Raw 1

1) The 1-2-3 Kid defeats Razor Ramon after a Dean Douglas top rope splash at 7:08

Fun Fact: Last week, 1-2-3 Kid interfered in Razor Ramon’s match and accidentally hit Razor as he came off the top rope trying to hit Davey Boy Smith. After the match, the two argued with each other. Kid said nobody took him seriously when he first beat Razor in 1993, and he challenged Razor to another match, which Razor accepted for this week.

Scott: We open with a rematch long overdue. Back in May 1993, Razor Ramon was a heel and the 1-2-3 Kid was a plucky jobber. Kid pulled off the upset and now two and a half years later they are both babyfaces and friends. I just realized as Vince McHaon said it that this Sunday is IYH #3. Then I recalled we lost two weeks of shows because of the US Open on USA Network. Jerry Lawler is fully in the Kid’s corner during this match, which tells me that a Kid heel turn may be in the offing somewhere down the line. The match is back and forth and when we went to commercial Kid had Razor in a sleeper until Razor recovered and got out of it. Both men are down and with the Canton crowd on their feet, Razor starts to really lay into Kid with some strikes as Vince says Razor actually isn’t going full steam because they are friends. At one point, Razor is in the ring on his back as the Kid is outside with the referee. Down the ramp comes Dean Douglas, who hits a splash on Razor, then escapes. The Kid crawls into the ring, drapes his arm over the fallen Razor and gets the three count. The Bad Guy is now more determined than ever to get the evil teacher. Grade: *1/2

JT: We waltz into week two of the new fall season, still in Canton, with a big night of action ahead of us. This is a very special Thursday night episode of Raw and Vince McMahon and Jerry Lawler have the call as usual and welcome us right into our very interesting opening match, which features two close friends going to battle after a skirmish a week ago. Of course, there is tons of history between 1-2-3 Kid and Razor Ramon and most of it has been woven into the very fabric of Raw. Kid chugs out first, looking to remind everyone that he isn’t just some lucky kid. Ramon saunters to the ring next and Vince hypes up his big match with Dean Douglas at IYH3. Kid jumps Ramon as he gets in the ring and quickly sends him back to the floor to gain his bearings. Razor charges back in and Kid outquicks him until the Bad Guy catches him on a cross body and then sends him flying with a big fallaway slam off the middle rope. Ramon keeps overpowering and hammering away at Kid as we get more IYH3 talk. King wonders if Kid has aligned himself with Douglas at all but Vince thinks he just wants respect from his friend and mentor. Ramon starts to work the arm and then crushes Kid with a hard uranage for two. Kid starts to mount a comeback and clocks Ramon with a spin kick for one. He follows up by jumping on Ramon’s back and hooking a sleeper, hanging on to the hold through a break. Ramon broke the hold and turned up the heat, burying Kid in the corner with a clothesline. Vince thinks Razor is holding back on his friend here and things start to get dicey when the ref gets wiped out during a collision. With everyone down, Douglas showed up and hit a big splash off the top rope on the Bad Guy before sneaking away. Kid and the ref both recovered and Kid would cover the prone Ramon for the upset win. The crowd was in shock at that one. I really enjoyed that match as it was well structured and hard hitting, especially during Ramon’s heat segment. It isn’t a shock that these guys have great chemistry but it is always fun to watch it play out. I liked the finish too as Kid gets his win but the IYH3 match gets a big heat boost. Grade: **

*** We go backstage, where a sweaty Dean Douglas is in his classroom. He gives 1-2-3 Kid a “D” for “dumb” and Razor Ramon an “E” for “elevate”, which is trying to do by taking on the Dean. He also gives him self an “A” and says Ramon will get an “N” on Sunday as it will be a no brainer who will win that match. ***

2) Tatanka & Kama defeat Savio Vega & Bob Holly when Kama pins Holly with a powerslam at 5:47

Scott: Interesting little tag team match here as two Corporate members face the Puerto Rican legend and the race car driver. This is rare for the WWF to have such a short amount of time to promote a PPV, even more so that this show was on a Thursday so that means only three days until IYH. The discussion on commentary centers around Henry Godwinn, who’s now on a mission to slop the entire Corporation, who at this point is nothing more than a bunch of glorified mid-card guys. This match is pretty good though as both teams are going back and forth until Kama recovers from a missile dropkick to reverse a cross body into a powerslam for the victory. Kama (and the Corporation) gets the much needed win. Sid faces Henry Godwinn on Sunday, a far cry from title matches with Diesel. Grade: *

JT: We head right back to the ring as Ted DiBiase leads out the very stale team of Tatanka and Kama for a battle with Savio Vega and Bob Holly. We head back to Superstars, where Henry Godwinn slopped DiBiase in advance of his match with Psycho Sid. Lawler reminds us that Vega is battling Waylon Mercy this Sunday and doesn’t think that match will go very well. Tatanka and Savio open things up and the Caribbean Legend gets off to a hot start, working over both men before sending Kama careening to the floor. Things reset as Holly and Kama tag in and we get a rather sloppy exchange between the two. Holly started to work the arm and then tagged in Savio but Kama caught him with a right hand. Tatanka tagged in and then bailed outside as Savio was picking up steam. We get some good heel work as Tatanka heads across the floor and trips up Holly, which allowed Kama to nail Savio from behind. The Million Dollar boys snuck in some double teams as Holly argued with the ref, gaining full control of the proceedings. Kama and Tatanka would dominate Vega for a minute or so until Savio and Tatanka collided heads, wiping both men out. Both would recover and make tags, with Holly coming in hot and landing the first shot, rattling the big man. Holly followed with a missile dropkick for two and then things broke down. Holly came flying off the top rope with a cross body but Kama caught him and awkwardly slammed him down for the win. This was a sloppy mess from bell to bell, especially when Kama and Holly were in there as they just didn’t mesh at all. Tatanka feels like a relic at this point and this whole match felt pretty aimless overall. Not much going on here. Grade: 1/2*

*** Razor Ramon is backstage and vows to take out Dean Douglas this Sunday night. ***

3) Jean-Pierre Lafitte defeated Brian Walsh with a somersault cannonball at 3:18

Scott: While this squash is going on, Vince is on the phone with Bret Hart, who will be facing Lafitte on Sunday in Saginaw. This all stems from Lafitte stealing glasses from kids and taking Bret’s jacket on Superstars. Wow this PPV is being totally rush booked with matches being slapped together at random. Lafitte wins, and is ready for the Hitman Sunday. Grade: DUD

JT: We go right back to the ring as Jean-Pierre Lafitte stalks to the ring, toting along Bret Hart’s jacket. Vince recaps the history between the pirate and the Hitman as Brian Walsh actually lands a couple of shots in. As Lafitte takes over, Bret Hart calls in from the set of Lonesome Dove. Hart makes some pirate jokes and then takes Lafitte to task for how he treats the young fans. Lafitte batters Walsh as Hart says the pirate will go down for all the stealing he has been doing of late. Hart hangs up and Lafitte finishes Walsh with a nice somersault cannonball. Lafitte has been sure and steady since debuting but finally gets his breakthrough chance on Sunday. Grade: DUD

*** Vince McMahon narrates through the history between King Mabel and Diesel to show the rise of Men on a Mission. ***

4) Owen Hart & Yokozuna defeat Men on a Mission in a non-title match when Hart pinned Mo after a Yokozuna legdrop at 9:30

Scott: Finally, we have two heel tag teams brawling it out here, but no titles are on the line so why would the fans care who wins the match? Just because Vince wants to see Yoko & Mabel in the ring together? Who cares? We already know that Owen can wrestle circles around Mo, so all in all this match could be an utter slog. It is cool to see the last two KOTR winners in the ring together. Owen & Yoko seems to be coming off as the babyface team in terms of structure, as they are the ones getting double teamed behind the referee’s back. Probably because even though he’s a heel, Owen Hart is a popular wrestler with the fans. Then again, Mo is getting double teamed a few minutes later. So maybe it’s just four cheating jerks trying to out “jerk” each other. The crowd is a bit timid until Yoko & Mabel start slugging it out. Yoko is heavier but Mabel is taller. Owen ends up pinning Mo after interference from Yokozuna. The match was frighteningly fun. Grade: **

JT: We head back to the ring for our final match of the evening as our Tag Team Champions make their way out, flanked by Mr. Fuji and Jim Cornette as always. Men on a Mission are already in the ring and Vince ensures us the ring has been reinforced here tonight. This is a pretty interesting match on paper, with both teams quite disliked by the fans and also due to the physical constitution of each unit. We get the showdown between Mabel and Yoko and then each time gathers and sets themselves. We open with Owen and Mo and they trade some offense, with both looking fairly crisp in their attacks. Mo snaps off a nice powerslam and then tags Mabel, who just spikes Owen to the mat by his hair and then kicks away. Owen would dodge an avalanche in the corner and then hammer away until the King shoved him back hard to the mat. The crowd certainly seems to be backing the champs here as Vince gives a final sell for IYH3 this weekend. Mo and Mabel take turns tagging in and out and putting a beating on Owen as we find out Diesel’s back is still dinged up from SummerSlam. Owen would block a sloppy Mo sunset flip attempt for two and then chuck Mo over the top to the floor, allowing him to finally tag Yoko. Yoko power walked into the ring and beckoned Mabel, but that just allowed Owen to batter Mo on the floor. That was a great heel spot right there. Owen shoved Mo back in and Yoko went right to work, viciously beating him down as the crowd buzzed a bit. After a break, Owen and Mo both went for a spin kick and whiffed, careening hard to the mat. They would both tag and Yoko and Mabel met in the center of the ring like two bulls colliding as the crowd popped. Mabel won the battle and actually worked over both champs before tagging Mo right back in. After a double clothesline by MOM, Mo peppered some shots until Owen kicked him in the back to kill his momentum. Yoko clotheslined Mo down and Owen hit a missile dropkick for a close near fall. Owen followed with a neckbreaker but Mo came back with a superplex for two. Things broke down with all four brawling but Mabel would get knocked to the floor, allowing Owen to trip up Mo and Yoko to drop the leg to give the champs the win. This was much better than it had any right to be with a much quicker pace than I expected. Mo was sloppy in spots as usual but he hung right with Owen throughout and the back-and-forth structure kept it moving. The Mabel/Yoko spots were also well done and the crowd pop for the big collision was a cool moment. I definitely enjoyed this more than I expected to heading in, so kudos there. The champs now move on to an incredibly high stakes match on Sunday. Grade **

*** Diesel and Shawn Michaels are backstage and talk all about their big Triple Header match on Sunday night at In Your House #3. Vince McMahon then gets in the ring to talk to Jim Cornette, Yokozuna and Owen Hart and they also give their thoughts on the Triple Header match. ***

Final Analysis:

Scott: With not much time to promote a PPV on Raw, this show did seem very rushed. The first match and the last match were entertaining enough but the announcing is the important thing here because the guys are trying to promote this PPV that had no real build on Monday nights because of the time off the show had to endure. Diesel’s title reign is really starting to fatigue but here he siphons off the hotter Shawn Michaels. Razor and The Kid are on a collision course down the line. A decent show and we are off to Saginaw! Final Grade: C+

JT: This was a tidy little go home edition of Raw and I have been enjoying the refreshed product since the new fall season launched. The graphics, the flow, the feel and just the overall look needed a change and we got it. They are pretty much embracing that they are taped some weeks now, including showing clips of what is to come throughout the night and it seems to be working for now. The roster is also fluctuating a bit, which is helping to keep things fresher too. We had two solid matches bookending the show and plenty of final hype for In Your House, which looks to be a decent enough show on paper. The main event here was pretty fun and was the best Mabel has looked since his big push began. And honestly I think that shows he is best used as a tag wrestler that can dominate in spurts. If he had a better partner, they could have had something more there. That said, all the gold is on the line this Sunday night, we will see if we have new champions in place next week on Raw. Until then… Final Grade: B-