Is there a place you could slip off to and wash your clothes or get a change of clothes? Even if they don't stay clean, just that little piece of freshness might perk your system up for a bit. (Not trying to pick on you, I know you're in a tough spot. Stay safe-- Love you, buddy.)
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headcanon/what if?? time
what if smithy used to be like a toy maker but something happened idk what, people fucking hated them or something and smithy was like, fuck this and started making weapons and became hungry for power because, honestly idk
then after years and years of making weaponry his mind stumbled upon the past, the undeniable fact that he does miss those days of just simply making toys. then he decided to make a toy that plays tribute to both of his creations that he used to and now makes. the geno doll, a hybrid between a toy and a weapon. smithy calls it the bridge between toys and weapons and finds it a very special creation of himself, a creation he wou always hold dear.
until one day where he shows his weapons his beautiful creations, then accidentally dropping it off the edge of the weapon world like a fucking idiot and somehow it flying out of exors mouth, falling onto a planet and landed right into the home of a lonesome toad boy who wished he had a toy to play with.
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I’m naively wishing we’ll find some kind of miraculous energy source that Big Oil won’t suppress the knowledge of. It won’t undo the harm we’ve already caused to the region or bring back the dead, but it’d remove the excuses our stupid government is making for supporting genocide and get us to leave the Middle East the hell alone.
Like, I already thought this when I found out we helped Iran get taken over by a repressive theocratic regime, but even moreso now I really don’t give a shit if switching to new types of transportation is inconvenient for me and everyone else so long as we stop forcing the places with oil to pay for our comfort and convenience with human lives.
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Okay so i've been rewatching MCD and Sasha says the Divine warriors fought the shadow lord, and the way its phrased i think they mean they all appeared to fight the shadow lord. Its probably a plot hole because Shad became the lord of shadows, but imagine if the divine warriors reincarnated and fought him again? Must've sucked for shad
(again, jan 22 ask)
I've actually found that there are quite a few inconsistencies regarding shad = the shadow lord, if you take everything people says as the truth.
Which i know for a fact is how we are meant to take it.
but i'm a pretentious bastard and i fully believe in 'sasha babyshits the shadowkids' hc that i spoke about ages ago.
So i like to think that Shad confided in Sasha about the war, but tried to distance himself from what he once was because the DW weren't fighting their friend, they were fighting who they feared their friend would be - the Shadow Lord, who he has become. And as much as he could say 'oh yeah they mostly all fought me but shad didn't agree lmao' he knows as much as anyone else that he was fighting who he was becoming most of all.
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i feel a feeling that is genuinely intolerable and go "okay what do i do with this"
therapist brain says "feel ur feelings, its unhealthy to suppress all the time." rational brain says, "hi if we sit with this emotion then we are going to either be bleeding or dead in approximately ten minutes. so whats another option." therapist brain goes "wellll i guess in that case maybe u can distract urself idk, that can be a coping strategy sometimes." rational brain glances at emotion, shakes its head and shoots back "yeahhhh no can do there bud. this one's a real whopper and distractions ain't gonna cut it this time."
both sections of the brain shrug at each other and then The Disorder brain raises its hand smugly and simpers out "hiiii remember me? yeah this is the reason i exist teehee :) give me five minutes and I'll have an amnesia wall erected and another part of the brain shoved into the forefront and then we'll be right as rain! and this emotion can go rot in the locked cabinet of horrors until another part accidentally stumbles upon it again in the future or until the lock breaks. :)"
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i have no idea what to do about this that wouldn't require doing something that could break whatever beautifully flawed ecosystem my laptop has created.
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pmsing is HELL ive had multiple full on shaking sobbing breakdowns over the tinest things like it just hits me at all at once im angry for no reason and im going to be in a horrific depressive episode until my period, i hate late periods because it just means it lasts longer, i feel like im going insane going feral hate it here
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