#ok whatever its fine. not my fault some people just dont get it. i am eating a pastry and thinking abt dev patel covered in blood

[sodrippy]

people on letterboxd giving monkey man 3 stars. you people are dogs.

[transfemlogan]

is it too late to ask about your problems with canon moceit. im really curious cuz i like their canon dynamic

ITS NEVER TOO LATE !!!

okay so okay. okay. okay.

i will say i do not like patton ships in general, minus royality, so some of my moceit dislike stems from that. like again im very neutral on ships, but i tend to stray away from patton ships. hes 1 of my least fave characters so i just dont like imagining him in dynamics.

BUT! a lot of my moceit hate stems fron how they're written. i don't like how janus'& patton's relationship in canon is written. i know we havent gotten a lot of in canon interactions bcuz its been almost 4 years but it feels very, very fast past & like... not how a relationship should span.

i know people get so pissy when you say this but it is inherently pattons fault that the dark sides exist— it's all of the light sides fault, dont get me wrong, but it is especially patton's fault metaphorically. i am not trying to demonise him or hate on him or like say he's the villain or whatever dumb shit, but patton represents thomas' morality. the dark sides exist because thomas views them as inherently evil & thomas' views and opinions are morality. that is the definition of morality.

metaphorically speaking, thomas' morality is the reasons the dark sides exist and patton represents his morality.

janus is a dark side. he was casted aside because thomas views lying as an inherently a bad thing because he is catholic. patton casted janus side because patton thought lying was an inherently bad thing.

so when i see like... janus & patton interact in the into the unknown video or in the 5 years video it's so strange to me to see there be 0 awkwardness. no grudges held against each other. no mishaps or underlying opinions. theyre just ... friends?

like, if you are pushed and demonised by this person, you are not going to just casually talk to them after getting accepted. i cant even remember if patton apologised to janus at all in POF. & like janus knows how pattom treats roman & c!tjomas & i know janus isnt going to demonise patton back (well. glances at how he treated roman. maybe he would.) BUT THERE SHOULD BE SOME SORT OF LIKE. "HEY U STILL DID THIS SHITTY THING TO ME."

like it's not a one time thing, for like 30+ years thomas did not know he had a deceitful side or a dark creativity or whatever the hell orange is. this is 30 years that the dark sides were demonised and treated like this. this is years of their life. that shit fucks with you. it's like getting bullies for years and now all of a sudden your bullies are like "ok ur fine now" except way fucking worse.

& especially for patton to not be hesitant to trust janus still or slip up and say something that implies that he still doesnt agree w/ lying or something or like. saying something that he knows is bad now but has thought for years so it's just a habit.

the fact that there's no hesitation on either of their ends to me is sooo EUGHH. like it'd be way more interesting to see them stumble over their friendship & struggle but they just DONT. DO THAT. & ITS TERRIBLE I HATE IT.

& i hate the idea of them ever being in a romantic relationship with each other. like... patton, you demonised this guy for fucking years. you treated him like shit but now you're nice and attracted to him. like it feels like one of those awfully written enemies 2 lovers. like thats.. very weird to me.

outside of canon, i think their dynamic is kind of fun. like . not exactky polar oppisites like how remus & patton are or virgil & patton are but not exactly different sides of the same coin like how janus & logan are. but like. i dont even know how 2 describe their dynamic. reaching for the same goal with the same methods but very very very different opinions.

IDK LIKE. YEAH i understand the reason 4 why people ship them, but they have the same issues as prinxiety 4 me i think. like acting as if their past can just disappear like that. 30 years is a lot of time of your life to be treated like that, and a simple "i trust you" or whatever will never erase that. & im not saying they cant try or that they shouldnt (they definitely should!). just that there needs to be more push back. more struggles within their relationship for it to feel realistic. (& a romantic relationship just icks me out. janus you should not get into a relationship with that man.)

ERRMM AND ALSO JANUS IS ALREADY DATING LOGAN NOT PATTON SOOO PATTON CAN GO AWAY 🙄🙄🙄 /J /SILLY

(if any moceit shippers want 2 talk abt moceit on this post, feel free !!!) (also the opposite is true, if u hate moceit like me feel free 2 express that also.)

[eddywoww]

I live in a more conservative area in the US. My family isn't, but whatever. Being LGBT was looked down upon in this area, my parents made sure to tell me it was ok and people were close minded (hell they even left the church they went to and started their own). They were great parents.

That being said the surrounding area was not. Got bullied in school for being gay, even though I simply was just focused on academics. I wanted an A more than I wanted the D am I right? Hm. It frustrated me because no one even asked and I was straight. This went on from when I was 10 to 17, when I finally graduated and got out of that area. The bullying was intense, from something as simple as name calling to having group projects turned in without my name but slurs on it to getting physically pushed around and shoved.

I went to college and met some cool people. Went to a pride parade as an ally. Started learning about different labels. Proclaimed to be demisexual with a desire for men because I still didn't really have any sexual desire and again, focused on school.

When I was 21 I moved to an entire new area for my job. Met a girl in her 30s who has a kid (12 or 13 at the time I dont remember) who came out as nonbinary and pan. Good for them! The woman was an "ally" except-

Tried forcing me to come out. Many times. Put me in secret uncomfortable situations. Some highlights of things she did were: take me to a gay bar without telling me thats where we were and then paying someone to kiss me and then kept asking if I realized I was gay because I didn't push the person away (I was shocked), after I claimed I was demisexual claimed that I had repressed my sexuality because society inherently tells you to be straight and that I was truly a lesbian, would claim I was a virgin if I never slept with a man because a woman couldn't take that so if i had "religious trauma" and wouldn't sleep with anyone based on keeping virginity i could with a woman and be fine (which I dont have any, my parents formed that church and were all inclusive and its a safe space hell they even organized pride events before the town did), and the worst of all got me drunker then I've ever been to the point I could barely stand and left me with a guy who had a crush on me who kept coming onto me. She talked to him and I saw her wink at him and she left me with this dude who got too handsy if you know what I mean. Nothing under the clothes happened thank God, and really it was my own fault for drinking so much at her place *she had many people over, I actually drank less then other people but still*. I asked why she left me with him and she said she was tired, then later said she wasn't surprised he tried anything and then said "well you're definitely gonna be gay now and not want to be with a man".

I left that area behind as my career progressed and it hit me, damn she was kinda fucked up. Kissed a few people and realized hold on I do have a sexual drive hello, and I dont have to get to know people first to have it?? Not demi then. Cool! Realised that the woman kinda fucked me up. I'm doing therapy which...is ok. But I got on Tumblr and have been on

And I've met some cool people. I've realized huh I guess a straight person doesn't think about boobs and vaginas while they get off. The dicks made sense, but the rest? And it hit me Holy shit im bi?? I think??

In my mind, being LGBT was okay but ME oh no suddenly it was the worst thing in the world. And im realizing its okay for me. Idk why I thought it wasn't except for the intense bullying. One thing that made me realize was everyone on tumblr. Like I said I met some cool people. I havent sent everyone a message because I want to be anonymous still. But you're one of the people who have helped me realize its ok. It is okay for me! So thank you for that. One of your fics really helped when I was first struggling with the realization and...thank you. It may not seem like a big thing to you, but its changed my life.

Thank you so much for sending me this. Like actually truly.

First of all, I’m so sorry for the situation with your ex friend. I can’t stand when people need to push and push to get the reaction THEY want, it sickens me deeply. Im sorry you went through that and I’m so happy you’re in therapy and that you’ve discovered yourself now.

It actually IS big to me when I hear about bisexual people accepting themselves. I don’t talk about it here much but I too grew up in a conservative area. I dropped out of school for bullying, etc but had the opposite story of knowing I was bisexual very young and not knowing how to word it? I just knew it was “bad” and I went to church a lot and I needed to repent for it. So I get that part in a warped way.

I think it gets to me for a very personal reason. There’s this inherent shake when you’ve been made to feel bad about your sexuality that resurfaces at random. I had an ex boyfriend who was obsessed with my sexuality in the opposite way. He was abusive and thought I was cheating constantly with my best friend, would call me a d*ke and a f*g constantly (almost always before some sort of physical abuse) and I was just deeply ashamed of my self, to the point of being biphobic at points.

What I’m getting at here is I came out after we broke up and I expected it to be this dawn of time shit because my family is accepting too! And I remember my mom getting upset and going, “Are you sure this isn’t about your breakup? Are you okay?” And I kind of just wanted to fucking scream. Or the way family members treat it like I’m divulging some sort of sexual secret. My sister coming out as bi years later really helped me. Dating someone who both did not care and didn’t want to sexualize me made it better.

In between all that, I ended up dating a girl who I could tell from the get go doesn’t see me (still now as friends) as “gay enough”. None of my struggle or my problems are the same, none of my fears are warranted, etc. that’s fine. I don’t need suffering to know who I am. What I’m trying to get at is even after years there are still tiny things that eat away at me but I’ve learned coping skills and developed friendships that make me feel so much better. And hearing stories from other people helps so much too. So thank you for telling me yours, it means a lot to me. I know you weren’t asking for a wordy response but I just woke up and I’m a sensitive bitch 😂

I’m sorry for the things you’ve gone through and I wish the world had been kinder to a young you. I’m glad you’re better now and if you ever need to message someone (if you ever choose to not be anon) I’m around ☺️💕

[starsambrosia]

Tw mentions of sa/abuse/trauma

I was talking with Uncle Zeus tonight...5am

I asked if he wanted me to write something or go to bed, he wants me to write before bed.

Ooh boy, yknow im partially scared about being open here since ive gone so long being sorta super abused for opening my mouth about this, but i lost a lot to get here yknow.

Im not some dumbass pretending or role-playing, i lost family, friends, a girl i thought i loved more than anything, my religon crumbled before my eyes, ive been abused, assulted, forced into some nasty shit. All because i opened my mouth about this.

You dont belive me? Check divination, ask Zeus yourself, i dont care anymore because what else can be done to me. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. And i know why he wants me to speak, i was so afraid so anxious to join pagan group or talk on here so scared to be flamed or outcast.

What can you do to me that the ones i loved most havent already done. Nothing. Whats some online dramma if it means i can finally open my mouth and express the things ive seen and felt.

It's been 6 years now since Apollo appeared to me, when i was a devout christian in training to be a prophet of "god"

Do you know how long i ran frome this??? Do you have any idea how long i fought them how many other pantheons i ran to and was booted out of, how many times Loki downright pushed me back to the greek pantheon, essentially saying "yeah this isnt my kid"

So much doubt and fear so much pain.

For the people who fake it, why? Why. This is hell this hurts this aches this has brought me unimaginable pain. I wanted so bad to just be normal to just be literally a normal ass dude.

I have lived in constant torture for so long. Day and night nothing but violation and suffering. I am a shell of what i was. And i have to heal so, so much, and i will never be the same. And even with all of that, im happier now...than i ever was christian.

I actually feel loved by them, supported, cared for. I feel bad i fought them for so long about this, i feel guilty that for so many years i shut them off saying it was hubris while they constantly patiently guided me over and over and over proving again and again that it was true and i couldnt run forever.

Its ok

Im scared, but thats ok

I'll be ok. People are entitled to their belifes and i know mine is controversial i know i might not be taken as seriously even though i dedicated so much time so so much time meditating, learning divination, channleing, banishments, hellenism as a whole as well as greek mythos and even teaching, reiki healing, greek cultural studies and history i put forth so much time and effort and study because i doubt I'm who they say i am and i fear so much that i am lying that one day Zeus will smite me for my audacity.

But, they havent.

Instead I'm embraced, met with love, care, encouragement, they get exasperated when i try to fall back to being a follower, they chastize me for it, i cant worship i cant do shit that followers can i am outcast from pagan groups because im looked at as a fraud or a scammer or an idiot when ive dedicated so much time to studying and learning just desprately trying to understand why im like this.

And yknow what

Thats fine

Everyone has their path, everyone has a right to belive, and I've met other demigods, ive seen them and ive done divination and theyr legit.

And anyways this is my blog i should be able to say whatever i want

If i can say stupid bullshit 24/7 why cant i actually express what i genuinely belive and hold very close to myself.

I pledged myself, mind, body, and soul to Lord Zeus, King of the gods.

If he sees fault in my actions he has and will punish me. I am more and more confident every day in who exactly i am.

And ive been through too much bullshit to stay silent any longer.

Thats my ted talk

[furiosity-wills-the-cat]

Chara, the fourth Blook cousin:

A crack theory that accidentally become way more serious than it should have because it somehow, despite my best efforts, ended up making sense

Brought to you by my idiot conspiracy brain (affectionate) and by encouragement from my Tumblr followers

Under the cut for the sake of your dashes and sanity

Ok here we go my very elaborate accidental theory, because in order to answer the complex questions simply you must first make simple things more complex or something

First, you need to know that Chara became a Blook cousin by adoption.

All of the Blooks are adopted.

Ghosts are not born into families, they make their own.

Got it? Great, because we’re about to start running

so first, im gonna make surprisingly uncommon claim in this fandom, and I am going to say that undertale ghosts are all dead

I’m taking the tiny details we know about ghosts and sprinting with them to new places

Ghosts also do not have souls I decided

Undertale souls do not work the same as souls in traditional mythology

So every ghost is soulless Unless and Until they become corporeal

Evidence: Monster souls cant exist without bodies, and ghosts are monsters, therefore ghosts cannot have souls without bodies

Further evidence: Asriel doesnt steal blooky’s soul, blooky is unkillable, we have no concrete evidence that blooky has a soul

What about mettaton? He only has a soul after he has completely committed to being corporeal and to a specific body.

Also maddy and mettaton are both only killable while corporeal

Im also connecting the dots we have about souls in a new creative way so let me live for a second

Additionally, i am going to claim that there are a lot more ghosts than just the blooks, some evidence given below

Theres like actual scientific knowlege of ghosts in the undertale verse which seems unlikely if theres literally only three or four

The underground is so much bigger than you think, theres that giant forest in snowdin, a large town in the ruins, the huge city of new home, who knows how much space in the large open areas of waterfall etc. Its really really big okay

Also based off evidence of blooky, we can conclude that ghosts can turn invisible whenever they want to and/or haunt objects to hide

So I personally think that ghosts are, generally speaking, extremely reclusive

And the blooks are just a special exception, a beautiful family, amazing for them

So anyway im going with typical ghost lore for now, for the sake of ease, so im gonna say ghosts generally come from monsters who are particularly restless or unsatisfied when they die

HOWEVER i dont think they remember being monsters or anything before being a ghost. They just kinda fizzle into existance with a fully formed personality and immortality while being unkillable and feeling vaguely uneasy

ALSO i personally think that chara was a ghost for a long time before they became a blook by adoption

Based on game lore, i think ghosts can possess any inanimate object and just kinda wear it? But it takes a lot of strong emotion to become corporeal

And chara is the super weird exception because they were a human not a monster.

They dont have a soul (i headcanon that their soul got destroyed when asriel died)

And they KNOW this, which is a huge part of why they kinda just... give up

Because they lost their ability to fulfill prophecy

Also, without a soul, they lost their ability to reset, so for the first time since falling underground, theyre subject to the relentless march of time

But theyre still weirdly strong and powerful and more emotional

ALSO they DO still remember being a human but they catch on pretty quickly that other ghosts dont have memories and because chara is stupid they just lie to fit in

Theyre too tired to explain themself, they just want to be alone and feel awful

Now back to ghost lore

Emotions are a lot harder for ghosts??? I decided

And they dont know why,, they tend to blame it on the soul thing

But realistically its actually more of the immortality thing making actions not have consequences and/or or not having a body so they cant have a sense of touch or have physical effects of emotion

They all know that ghosts just tend to be way more floaty and bored and numb

And thats part of why the blooks are so special

Maddy’s rage and Mettaton’s yearning and Napstablook’s misery are like... not great all of the time...

but theyre also way way more emotion than most ghosts have,,, they are just a family supporting each other, being as functional as they can,, just an emo(tional) ghost family

most ghosts barely do anything except like stare at walls but the blooks have their snail farm and that helps them have purpose and it is good

And they hold each other accountable and it is nice

So anyway chara just chills and is in a depression coma for a few decades before the blooks find them and are like “our child/baby cousin”

and they raise them for a cool minute

They are all very protective of the new baby emo blook

And chara doesnt get therapy but at the very least they once again have a family, and they decide they want to try to become corporeal eventually just like mtt and maddy

So anyway chara starts hanging out in the ruins a lot more and they finally tell the blooks theyre leaving to go become corporeal in the ruins

This is actually because they are trying to hang out with toriel

because they miss their mom ;;

but chara’s not gonna admit that to anyone, especially not to themself

And because theyre still repressing their emotions constantly and pretending to be fine, they cant become corporeal

And they hang out in the ruins for a long time because they feel guilty lying to everyone about everything

They still feel like its their fault that all the monsters are stuck underground, because they were SUPPOSED to save everyone and they COULDNT and it HURTS

But again, they are doing too much repression to use this guilt to become corporeal,

so instead they just kinda hide and watch toriel from a distance and cry

Blooky visits them the most, thats why blooky is chilling in the ruins so much at the start of the game

Theyre just there to visit their shy baby cousin ;;

Ofc they wont tell frisk about this because chara wants space and privacy and blooky respects that

but maddy and mtt also visit them a lot

Oh also when mtt and maddy start dissapearing, blookys mental health plummets as their family and support system starts to dissolve

Blooky was actually doing extremely well (for a ghost) for a long time, i headcanon,

but theyre doing the worst theyve been in a long long time during the game, because of family issues

So anyway, chara dissapears when frisk shows up, and maddy assumes this is becaude frisk hurt their fragile feelings

Maddy spends hours desperately searching the ruins for chara and cant find them and assumes that they had their heart crushed and went to hide and disappear in a depression coma for another few decades, and thats part of why maddy is so furious with frisk

Like,, to be clear, maddy is still jumping to conclusions and throwing blame around with no proof, but also, its a logical conclusion to come to

And mettaton has already disappeared too and been gone for a while, too, by this point, so it hurts even worse

But anyway, what actually happened to chara is that;

Because chara is a human ghost, not a monster ghost, normal ghost rules dont apply to them

And they can possess living things too they find out

Maybe they knew it a long time ago, maybe its a new discovery, but for whatever reason they end up possessing frisk and theyre like “what the heck”

And frisk still has most of the control

But now chara is like,,, “this is my chance, im a human again, gotta save the world for real,,,”

and they cant explain this to anyone without revealing their past

so they just chill in frisk’s mind while being super crypic and trying to figure out how it works

Pacifist route, this is pretty much exactly what happens

They manage to help frisk save the day

And in my headcanon, the no mercy route is started by frisk who is scared when faced by monsters attacking them

And then chara, who was aready hiding in a semidepression coma for a while, immediately transitions to a panicked “gotta protect this body, gotta protect my chance to be human, i died and threw away my chance to save everyone the first time, i CANNOT lose this chance again”

And so the combination of both frisk and chara is the genocide run

Because frisk kills in self defense, and whenever frisk hesitates, chara jumps in

Also theres leftover feelings from the whole asriel incident

Because again, ghosts come from monsters who died unsatisfied

And chara’s main source of unsatisfaction is how they were trying to get asriel to kill people before he died and then he didnt

So thats a strong strong feeling ruling them

So anyway by the time they both realize how bad its become they figure its too late and also the amount of LOVE has made them numb

And thats when chara who, despite everything, still has idiot hero complex and thinks they need to save the world

So, while panicking, they step in at the very end, and erase the timeline and delete everything

And also to clarify

They DONT HAVE this power at any other point in the game

Because, guess why

They become corporeal

Just like maddy, the no mercy route is the only thing that gives them strong enough emotion to spontaneously become corporeal

So they become corporeal and as soon as they have a soul again and can reset again, they just erase everything

Ok back to fluff

Post pacifist route, they are still a non corporeal ghost

They can still float around and look just like the other blooks

And it takes them a while to open up about things, but they do end up moving back in with blooky so that blooky isnt completely alone

And also they do way better with a family

Also they can float through the mountain and talk to flowey down below and bring him news

And now that they know about him, they can bond with him and explain that they dont have a soul either but that doesnt mean theyre worthless

Oh ALSO

The other dead humans dont have ghosts

BECAUSE

ghosts only come from restless dead MONSTERS

and chara is the weird special exception

Because they were a monster when they died

They became a ghost and asriel didnt because they were way more restless and stressed than asriel was when both of them died

Like sure, asriel felt awful, but chara was the one who was way more like “this is my fault, i CANT die now, the world NEEDS me”

So anyway

charablook the emo tween ghost and asriel flowey the eldrich goat daisy are siblings once more and they hang out and eventually they are okay and have a family again

Thank you for reading, this has been my thoughts on a crack theory that accidentally went too far

This isnt even everything, maybe i’ll make a part two eventually, but i promised to have this post out like two days ago, so i wanted to post SOMTHING

Anyway leave your thoughts if youd like

Im not looking for people to disprove it, i already know its crazy, i dont think it was intentional by the game writers, but i do think its a fun concept

thats the fun of it, so if anyone wants to run with it im all for it lol

Thanks again! Have a nice day!

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom episode 4-7 Thoughts: (under a readmore because, these got kinda long!)

-the outfit danny had to buy for dash's party. CLASSIC 2000S i cannot stop laughing. And also showing up to the party and everyone is dressed like the trio is hilarious. and further proof that everyone looks good dressed goth.

-dash has a closet full of cute lil bear plushies?? LOVE that. adorable. also his response to danny trashing his room fighting a ghost was SO valid if somone BROKE MY BED IN HALF ID BE PISSED TOO.

-technus being like 'oh smart, u should be a tutor!' then later being like 'forget tutor, be a teacher!' :) supportive king <3 I also really like his upgraded suit/design. AND SPOCK CAMEO??? HELLO??

-the music in this show is super. its so funky. I looked it up and the guy who does it, guy moon (awesome name) also did music for other cartoons like fairly odd parents, barnyard, chalkzone, billy & mandy, AND some actual movies like FIGHT CLUB??? the whiplash I got from reading that)

-sam being rich explains a lot about her, actually.

-I know the moral of the episode was supposed to be 'dont ditch your friends for popular people/spend a lot of money on clothes that arent You to Fit In'. but tbh. it wouldve been easy for danny to have been like 'well, okay, ill come but only if my friends can!' but I get. that hes 14. so. not a lot to say there.

-BOX GHOST IS BACK!!!!! also, danny sitting up and wearing the dress/wig/makeup. umm thats how I dress everyday LMFAO. unironically me. (hate the jokes that boil down to 'haha funney man in dress' tho. but this is a look)

-jazz being protective of her brother once again being like NOOO YOU GUYS BETTER NOT STAKE OUT HIS (actually haunted) LOCKER!! shes aware of how people perceive him and she wants to help :( which is also probably why she told dash to invite him to that party even tho she had no interest in going!! she wants to help him out :(

-gotta say im with tucker on the whole 'should danny use his powers to get back at bullies' debate. 100% yes. let him teach kids to fight back. making dash throw his food at paulina out of the blue? no. but when hes actually about to pick on someone? yeah! for self defense? YEAH! if dash and his friends just threw food at him, I think rather than. idk doing sneaky shit with frogs he couldve just threw it back and not pulled punches if they tried to fight. I kNOOWWW its a kids show so they are like 'if u fight back ur just as bad!! violence bad!!' but. theyre HIS POWERS. WHO CARES.

-like my only gripe is that dash really isnt LEARNING ANYTHING WHEN DANNY GETS BACK AT HIM IN THE MOST PETTY INDIRECT WAYS. whatever they had to add a bully psa episode I guess. I hate it and I hate the way cartoons usually handle it because these methods simply Do Not Work. 'aND YouRE USinG YOur poWErs FOR EVill???!' this is Not Evil. even when poindexter takes dannys body, theyre only being 'nice' bc hes stealing soda for them!! bitches deserve what they get (nothing too brutal bc theyre high schoolers but damn, if they pick on danny he doesnt need to be the 'bigger person' he needs to start biting people)

-SAM TRYING TO SMUGGLE FROGS OUT OF THE BIO LAB?? girl in middle school when we had to dissect frogs we could opt out, also, they came to us already dead and preserved...

-sidney's lingo and the fact hes in black and white is sending me. also, danny is a ghost celebrity apparently for being a halfa?? ok. thats interesting to know

-the DENTIST BEING EXCITED ABOUT THE COTTON CANDY FLOOD IS THE FUNNIEST THING SO FAR.

-I LOOOVE the trope of 'wishes gone wrong'. not crazy about the stereotypical genie, or the use of the dreamcatcher looking design. (also, I KNOW theyre scientists but the way theyre handling a cold...are the fentons ANTIVAX)

-the genie. she. whitewished paulina. JKASDFHKJ. (the ghost literally just being hello kitty???? im dying) 'why do i feel that im special and wonderful? because I AM! <3' paulina ilu self worth queen. felt bad for her also getting possessed by (2) boys later who were arguing INSIDE HER. WTF.

-imagine being the guy trapped in his now flying car. he thought danny and tucker were HALUCINATIONS. imagine being trapped in a flying car with two, what you think are imaginary arguing 14 year olds convinced ur gonna die. i WOULD say this dude is gonna need so much therapy, but he seemed totally fine and excited when they landed (I would be happy too if a chicken was on my head. chickens rule) stoner rights

-sam's bat slippers??? iconic. SO cute.

-I think desiree's backstory is so :( do all ghosts have messed up sad backstories?? poindexter's was sad too...cannot imagine box ghost has any kind of fucked up backstory. but what if. his mom got pushed off cliffs by boxes...........a la cruella... anyway her 'no man may lay a hand on me' iconic. ilu

-I know danny has no concept of how much bras cost but my god dont attack tucker with some girls bra. those are so expensive.

-its really. well its not a GOOD THING he went into the portal and got fucked up, but its good danny was the one to do it rather than sam or tucker. because even tho he was being influenced by desiree and kept getting more malicious and it prob wasnt 100% him...he sucked as a ghost like most the people he 'pranked' were innocent ppl just Chillin and he didnt want to help anyone at all. I think danny is the most responsible out of them but also, hes 14 and shouldnt HAVE to feel obligated to fight every ghost. hes a good kid and wants to, but I also feel like he feels like...responsible for the portal turning on?? because his parents did give it up,, but it was an accident and not his fault (if anything, why was the on switch on the inside. why was it that easy. why was there no safety measures. that seems like smth OSHA needs to hear about). like thats my son. hes a good boy. and hes never done anything wrong in his life, ever. if anyone hurts him im killing everyone in this room and then myself. etc.

-danny's curfew is 10PM????? DUDE. when I was 14...shit I couldn't be out that late, I had to be back at like, 8 at the latest, and my parents had to know exactly where and who I was going with, AND i had to call/text them regularly...is this a case of my parents being overbearing, or the fentons sucking??? the only time i could EVER be out that late was if I was at an overnight sleepover or smth...

-the vultures have lil fezes. why do they have fezes...theyre so fuckin funny 'ask him for directions' 'I KNOW WHERE IM GOING' these ghost vultures are my new grandpas. pick them up, put them in the adopt box.

-'I wonder why those guys were trying to waste dad!' THEYRE GHOSTS. YOUR DAD HUNTS GHOSTS. why is that not a conclusion you'd immediately jump to??

-*jazz voice, clearly disgusted* WISCONSIN???

-mrs fenton with the lab coat and leg warmers and PERM. YESSS STYLISH.

-was going to say 'ew billionaire' @vlad but. super valid he used his powers to assumedly steal and cheat to get that money, thats how all billionaires do it! but ew hes a SIMP. and spending your billions on FOOTBALL STUFF?? you are Not Valid overall. I DO respect the fact you have a castle instead of a mansion. in wisconsin. if youre going to be stupidly rich might as well go all out, torches on the wall and all. I DO like his ghost form's little kitty ears. catman. and his cape! every design can benefit from a cape. and how different his forms look, like danny looks the EXACT SAME IN BOTH FORMS ASIDE FROM COLOR CHANGES. vlad's is like,, I could believe they were different people!! also I love the drama. but dude you are fighting a 14 year old. lame. also he was like, telling danny he wanted his mom and him and like, wanted him to renounce his dad?? WHAT ABOUT JAZZ?? bitch. those r MY kids and they are both important and special. I do agree they need better parents but thats not u sir <3

-I thought vlad's 'little badger' nickname for danny came from the football mascot of the packers, but google says they have NO MASCOT?? so now I'm like?? is it because his hair is sometimes black and sometimes white?? I hate to give him props but thats a PERFECT NICKNAME. theyre also tiny and vicious!

-why did I get so excited that Skulker is back!! its been like. 2-3 eps LMAO. AND THE DAIRY KING. ICONIC I LOVE HIM. hes the nicest guy ever :) more nice ghosts please. danny cannot be fighting alone everytime with no ghost buds like every ghost being hostile sucks :(

-mr. fenton knew vlad was controlling him, but a few episodes ago he had no clue danny was doing the same thing...is it something about how malicious the ghost is?? he just seemed to think his memory had gaps the first time, this time he was INSTANTLY LIKE 'GHOST'. then again in this ep when danny did it again he was just slightly confused but not immediately freaking out like he did with vlad possessing him!!

-'my parents will accept ME NO MATTER WHAT' so. so why haven't you come out to them yet, danny?? if you really think that?? if theres no harm, and you're sure??? if vlad is a real problem, wouldnt that make dealing with him easier, to expose him???? SO WHY HAVENT YOU COME OUT YET?? COULD IT BE,, MAYBE YOU HAVE DOUBTS ABOUT WHETHER YOUR PARENTS ACTUALLY WILL ACCEPT YOU??? 🤔 ... 🏳‍🌈 I get why people say He Is Trans. I totally totally get u danny.

-sorta unrelated, but it just occurred to me in one of these eps they go to casper HIGH not casper middle school??? theyre 14?? dont highschools usually do ages 15-18? (I didnt go to hs so I might be wrong, if I am ignore this...) freshmen are usually 14-15, could just be a case of them not turning 15 yet but they will sometime in the school year (I say they because tucker said he was 14 too)? I know the show has 3 seasons, so by the end of it will they be older? thatd be neat but usually cartoon characters stay the same age...I love shows where you can see the characters age and grow up, though...three seasons seems like a long time to spend on like, 1 year...

[sheraayasher]

rant: pls ignore

so i am going to hostel in a few days and i have just being preparing for that. like yk if i got all the things needed, do i need to buy anything etc. recently things are just so hurried idk if it makes sense but.. never in my life till now i have actually felt things going hurriedly yk. idk i'm just not feeling me. i am on the verge of crying while typing this lmao.

but again i have existential crisis almost everyday so thats thing new. i just feel very insecure and worried. no i am not worried if i will be able to manage without my parents - i have done that many times before. i am worried about how my classmates will think of me, what will their perspective of me be, how will they behave when with me and when i'm not around. i know i do not have the "perfect" figure: i am a plus sized or a chubby person. heck i am not even fit, i am the most non-flexible person ever. everyone is gonna make fun of me. no one wants to be friend with a person who constantly experiences body insecurity, has social anxiety and is introverted. every one likes the "sunshine" person. the person who gets along with everyone, who gets awesome grades in everything, who has the fit if not the perfect figure, who can balance sports time/hobbies and studying time simultaneously.

i am scared i will be alone again - not that i am not used it. i honestly dont mind it either - in fact i prefer it. but its the fact that i will be left lonely again that just scares the shit out of me. i am not afraid of being alone, i am afraid of being lonely. i am afraid i might make "friends" but i will still have my lunch on my own.

i just dont feel good. and i know this is just for sometime, once i get into it i will be busy with assignments and shit to even care about it but that only means it wont come on the surface. it only means that it will remain on the seabed - it always remain at the back of my mind. the pandemic has changed me - and not in a good way. i hate human interaction more than ever and i have become so fucking lazy.

its my fault really - i shouldn't have let it get to me. i should have tried hard, i should been like everyone else who went out for run, walk or cycle everyday. i just want to give up. i want to give up so so so bad but i too coward to give up. i am this stupid scaredy cat who just tries to show everyone that i am not afraid of anything and my confidence is just an act. its a pathetic act to make people believe that "i am awesome and i dont care about anything". its a pathetic attempt at hiding my insecurities which 24x7 keeps poking my brain like a fucking reminder.

i crave attention - but not in a way like oh look at me i am gorgeous or some shit. i crave attention in way like i want to be held. i want someone who can understand me and not judge me. i seek validation. i just want people to tell me i am fucking great and sexy even when i know i am not going to believe a word they say bc i have fucking made this horrible image of myself in my brain. yes i know what exactly is wrong with me and want needs to be fixed but i just cant be able to fix it. i have tried, i have tried so fucking hard to fix it but i just cant. it just like waves yk every time i think ok now i am ready i can face the wave its gonna be fine - its not fine. i the wave pushes me down again and it does it with so much ease its as if the wave didnt even have to fucking try.

and that shit is messed up, i know. but i just i just feel so fucking helpless - i get frustrated and angry then. and oh boy if this wasnt enough i have anger issues. i throw things in anger, i speak things i am not supposed to say or i dont mean in anger. so yeah. i admit. the major purpose of putting this rant on my main blog was that people might read and give me comfort and tell me sweet things and praise me and whatever. i am an attention seeker - i agree to it. and i am gonna confess/agree to this too that i secretly liked when there was some small hate about me - the things people said in response to that - i really felt happy. i felt as if people do care, they do understand but it was again short lived bc then the insecurity came like a sudden wave - as if i wasnt expecting it to come so soon.

i'm just a boring, stupid and the biggest dumbfuck ever. i'm sorry if you think that, i am really trying to be interesting istg i am. just give me more time - i will be fine. i will be the interesting person. just give me some time.

[energyanon]

ITS TIME FOR:

THE SEBASTIAN STAN MEGAMIX:

Don’t you dare go through the rest of the reading without getting yourself hyped with the link first cause I spent OVER TWO HOURS ON THIS READING AND YOU WILL DO WHAT I ASK DAMMIT.

* https://youtu.be/nendMLrpI-s*

ALSO: no one kill me, there is a very unpopular opinion that unfolded. I just feel the energy, don’t avada kadavra the messenger. It’s not my fault if it doesn’t match your ideal, man.

I’ve put Seb down first - just on his own.

I know I’ve said he seems like a sad bitch, and this might be because it was his birthday like.. what yesterday? And maybe I’m in his current energy (I’ll check on a different timeline) but…

Fans are gonna say it’s fake - he’s happy.

He’s really content. He’s swaying a bit which is why I feel like there’s like a tiny bit of drunk-ness hence why I feel like I’m in his CURRENT energy, but there’s 0 fault. He is so peaceful and happy and content. There’s nothing else to it.

So I closed that off, switched him over to “2021 energy” just to see how he’s been going for the most part rather than right now. And there was an immediate change, specifically to the middle of my head, a sort of pressure there. Heavy eyes, not as happy and starting to get hot. Specifically in shoulders and arms and hands. Hands is usually anxiety, shoulders and arms… I don’t usually get. The happiness is there but the smiles are fleeting. Otherwise it’s not sad it’s just… floating through, getting by. Pressure in my head is getting worse though and now my back is itchy. With energy letting me know that, I can only assume there needs to be a placement of something behind him.

Ok, placement behind him whatever it is, is DRAGGING him down. Mood changed entirely. And he’s being pulled BACK to this thing almost like he wants to fall into it. He’s really focused on in front of him, not quite scared, but eyes wide. Panicked. He does NOT want to look behind him.

The feeling now is.. almost a depression; tired. And he’s looking on the ground now. That almost always means that he’s looking at someone who has died.

Guys? Any death around him recently??

YOOO OK THATS FUCKED AS SOON AS I WROTE THAT THERE WAS SOMETHING IN MY ROOM THAT MOVED ITSELF WITH A GIANT CLANK 👀 I AM NOT DOING A SEANCE TONIGHT FOLKS I AM OUTTIE.

CLOSING THAT ONE OFF REAL FUCKING FAST JOLY SHIT. Gimme a sec to get whatever the fuck that is outta here.

Ok no that’s a lie. Why does it feel like Grandparent Stan.

Guys, has one of the grandparent Stan’s died? It’s not a bad energy, but to him it feels like depression. I’m taking a moment just to speak to them cause they clearly wanted my attention. I tried to end it there cause I don’t fuck with spirits, but as soon as I tried to close my apps it said “no” really sweetly, so…

Ok so I just spent about half an hour doing a mini constellation for them. When it comes to grief and also the ~spirit~ letting itself be known I knew they were gonna stay around until I helped. It was pretty personal, but I got them through it. Felt a lot like a grandma from one of the sides I’m not sure who. Gave me some very cute images of her and little Seb playing in a park and cooking 🥺 Seb cried alot, but was also VERY happy to see her. They said their bits, he knows she’s a support. She’s agreed to be there for the rest of the reading however he needs her. They’re currently holding hands in letting him keep her there.

Let’s move on.

Didnt think I would cry in this one but here I am.

Ok I’ve got him in his previous position, Grandma?Stan is behind him, we’re moving on.

He feels A lot better now that the grief has been sorted through. Feels fresh.

Career/fans came up in that mini constellation so I will put that down next.

The only thing he brought up about the fans was he feels like they’re ripping him apart. He feels like everyone wants a piece of him and he can’t give them that.

I put career down. Career is in front of him facing him to his left. The fans, surprise surprise, wanted to be right on top of him. And he is CHOKING with that being the case. Throat clamping up, airways are BLOCKED. I’m moving them off.

Even then, the fans are too close, Seb has taken two steps back.

Even then they’re still too close. He’s moved to behind career, so career is blocking the view of him and the fans.

Here in this position he’s standing like a statue, he feels like he’s successfully hidden and it’s here he’s gonna stay.

Moving to career:

Career is super confused at where he went and also feels like fans are a bit close. also feels like it is better than the fans. Kind of giving them a look of disgust. Career seems to understand that the fans are gonna be stuck close to them but they think of them a bit like they’re looking at something a bit dirty.. like career doesn’t want to get their hands on them. Career wants to turn to Seb.

Career is bigger than Seb by quite a bit. Not as overbearing as Chris’s career was though, and seems to be on good terms with him. It doesn’t have any feelings of animosity towards Seb, it’s just looking at him like “you good?” And then looking back at the fans and being like “cause of THEM? Really? Lol ok”

But career feels fine to block him off from fans, that’s ok it doesn’t mind. Career doesn’t want Seb to take his eyes off it though. Eyes on career. Keep your eyes on career.

Don’t look anywhere else. Eyes on career.

Back to Seb:

Seb agrees, eyes on career. He’s very obedient to that.

There’s nothing else for me to do with these two so I went to see if he wanted to look past career at fans. He didn’t. Eyes on career.

(What have you guys done to him, i followed him back in CA:WS and he wasn’t like this at ALL. Damn guys.)

I went back to fans and they just kept making the same movement, they wanted to be on top of him. Close wasn’t close enough. I’m not moving them back there though cause then it will just go in circles and we want MOVEMENT.

I’m leaving fans there.

I am adding GF

Ale? Is that what people call her?

Ale has placed herself behind career. She is currently fully in the fans view, but she’s facing career and seb, career has back to her, seb is facing her way.

She seems to know that career is most important and she’s ok with that. She’s kind of expectantly trying to get his attention though. Like the feeling of waiting for someone to get off work and waiting for them at the door. She’s just waiting. She looks at fans like they’re beneath her though. Doesn’t like them. Not dislike, but they’re beneath her, she doesn’t need to interact.

No other movement from her besides the fact that she wants seb to move over to her so he can be by her side.

I went to the fans and they’re just all BORING their eyes into her. No need to even look at seb it’s ALE. No movement from them otherwise.

Moving back to seb:

Eyes on career. Eyes on career, except ale is more interesting now and he wants to shuffle over her way, but also career? But also ale.

He doesn’t want to go the obvious way, he kind of wants to sneak past career.

I’m gonna sneak him past career.

He’s doing it sheepishly and very slowly. Like a little boy shuffle.

Ok seb is now in front of ale, career is behind him, backs faced to each other.

Ale is taller to him. (Usually means he thinks highly of her OR that she’s in a more powerful position in the relationship but it doesn’t feel like that he’s acting like a simp)

So weird this is such simp behaviour, I moved ale back a little cause they were practically on top of each other but he was like “noooooo” and moved himself closer again.

Like dude you’re practically breathing in her organs. Chill.

It’s weird though Hes not feeling like He wants to cuddle her or be anything other than just close to her. He seems to be completely mesmerised by her. Short breaths though, he’s not relaxed. But he cannot take his eyes off her.

Moving to Ale:

She doesn’t really take her eyes off him either but she’s much more easily distracted.

She’s very fond of him though. She feels very content. She likes him, she’s happy there.

No more movement from either of them so let’s ask questions.

I asked both parties if they loved each other. Ale said yes, seb said I don’t know.

It’s also not “I don’t know” in a 😬 way it’s.. a curious and nice “I don’t know” kind of like.. “I’ve never felt like THIS before.. is THIS love?”

He does feel a bit blocked though, like he’s not admitting to himself 100% but it’s so bizzare his feelings and his words aren’t matching up cause I feel so fond of this woman so why is he saying I DONT KNOW?!

Ok I see the problem now. I just said one word:

Q:

Marriage? Ale said “yes please :)”

And sebs immediate reaction was 😳 😬

Ya boy. Has commitment issues. He’s making sense now. I swear to god if he has Gemini in his chart.. I swear.

Q: ale, why did you get with seb?

He seemed nice 😊 (also an image of a yacht on the water popped up?)

Q: do you have pure intentions towards him

She… didn’t know how to answer that, it was a very hesitant yes.

Q: are you with him for the money?

The answer was a pretty clear yes but she tried to cover her tracks with “it’s nice 😊”

Q: If Sebastian lost everything would you still love him?

No hesitation it was still yes.

So what I’m getting here is she does like the money, she does like him, money is a main factor but… she genuinely likes him I don’t know what to tell you guys.

Q: seb do you like ale?

Yes

Q: why did you start dating her?

She’s hot! (He laughed at that) and then said she’s funny, she’s cute, she’s sweet… great body

Q: do you think you’ll spend your life with her?

Same reaction as the marriage question it was a very hesitant “I’m not sureeeeee….”

The energy is drifting a bit now so I’m ending it here:

Q: is there anything else you want to say.

I wish they would leave her alone

Q: do you want them to leave you alone?

No, I can handle it. They can do what they want, I just want them to leave her alone.

That’s it!

That’s all I got.

I didn’t get any bad vibes from Ale at all.

She seems to like him. I don’t know why everyone is so mad?

Seb also seems to like her. I’d be surprised if he doesn’t have Gemini in the big three or Venus, cause that’s exactly like me, ive got Leo Venus, cancer sun that makes me all lovey physically but in my gemini moon and merc make my head like MMmmmMmmMmM BUT DO I ACTUALLY LIKE THEM THOUGH? Haha.

Someone look up his chart for me pls.

Edit: I did just realise I didn’t even ask if it was PR. Sorry, my bad. Assess the above how you will.

That also didn’t go how I thought it would at all. I know you guys thought he was super sad and making all the wrong decisions, but he really only seemed dragged down from something else entirely. That being said I didn’t add the agency you guys warned me about but it also didn’t pop up at all. Maybe in the next one. I did make a couple of mistakes here in terms of probably not asking the right things that will make the entire situation clearer. Sorry guys when I’m in it I’m only thinking of what pops up and going where the energy leads me. 😶

Peace ✌🏼

[kakyoinryoko]

I uh. Actually have some thoughts abt jotaro on the infinity train so i'm gonna put them here:

I feel like he'd board the train twice. Once with kakyoin when they're teens in the middle of sdc, kakyoin would get his number down to 0 and jotaro wouldn't (he'd get his number a bit down but not to 0) but the train would let him go anyway in a sort of "we'll meet again one day" manner. And then 33 years later when he gets jolyne out of prison him and jolyne will end up boarding the train together (possibly with the rest of the SO cast but i feel like they'd get separated from them on the train) and he'd be very close to actually getting his number down to 0 but then made in heaven happens and the train is forced to let him and jolyne go

TLDR: boards train twice, once in sdc with kak and once in so with jolyne, doesn't get his number down to 0 (but comes very close the 2nd time) but the train is forced to let him go anyway both times

hmm honestly i feel like if kakyoin boarded the train it would have to be something he did alone, without any stand users. at the end of sdc he does make big strides towards selflessness but i also don’t think that necessarily indicates he’s made any strides towards seeing non stand users as people, and i think having another stand user there would hold him back from receiving that message. part of kakyoin’s problem is that he sees his own fatal flaw as cowardice without really acknowledging any of his other flaws, and i think having jotaro of all people with him would be more a hindrance than a help in confronting his real deep-seated shortcomings. if i were to put him on the train i would say it should probably be a post-sdc thing that he does by himself, in a period where he’s feeling very stuck. i will not get into my Future Kakyoin Lore right now though that would take way too long

i also think jotaro boarding the train would have to be post-sdc just because during sdc itself, he actually IS bettering himself and unlearning some of the unhealthy shit he has internalized. the problem is all of that comes crashing down at the end because of the horrible shit that happens to him and his friends in the final few arcs. similar to how i think kakyoin would end up post-sdc, except in a way we actually see play out in canon, jotaro becomes a very stagnant person. he doesn’t change much from part to part. he doesn’t improve. he mellows out over time, but that’s about it. i think a big part of the train’s purpose is helping people when they are feeling frustrated with the states of their lives but have nowhere else to go; it’s a literal escape, and one way to drag jotaro out of his self destructive spiral would be to force him to leave behind everything else in the world for a while. i just don’t think that could happen in a period where he is actively improving. i do think the idea of him leaving the train before he’s ready and being forced to go back later is really really awesome in concept, though i’m not sure how i would work that in.

jolyne being there with him would be one way to force them to confront their relationship, although honestly their relationship being strained is pretty much entirely jotaro’s fault, and within the canon of infinity train the relationships we see being mended over time (well i primarily mean min gi and ryan, both because they’re also a dual passenger situation and because its the season i’ve watched most recently and remember the most of, lol) are ones in which the fault is a two way street; neither party is entirely innocent in the pain. jotaro’s pain wrt jolyne is pretty much entirely self-inflicted, and on the other side of that, no matter what jolyne does jotaro is going to keep hurting her. if jolyne had a journey on the train, assuming we are going from before the beginning of stone ocean, i think it would perhaps have to rely on looking within herself to find peace rather than attempting to seek validation through empty relationships with whomever she can get to stick around. we dont see a ton of that because it seems like she gets over it pretty quickly (her sudden shift in character is a problem i have with stone ocean, but i digress) but canonically a lot of her teenage years were shaped by rebellion and dating shitty guys to fill the void of affection in her life, so maybe that could be something. otherwise though i think she’s well rounded enough as stocean progresses that the train might not even need to come for her. i think in the context of infinity train jotaro’s relationship with jolyne would have to be mended in a similar way to jesse’s with his little brother; it has to be more about realizing that he’s fucked up, how, why, and what he needs to do to fix it than about talking it out and realizing their own respective shortcomings, since there’s little in that situation that jolyne has done to wrong jotaro.

well. ok. well. so. this is just what i think i am so sorry if it sounded like i was just tearing down all your ideas or something sorry sorry its fine i am just saying whatever. you can anything.

[gothamdad]

THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS PART ONE: CINEMATIC WRONGS AND ANALYSIS COMMENTARY

DO NOT REBLOG.

This is going to be a bullet point list of incidents that occur in the movie, and will either have my general commentary or an analysis of what makes the scene terrible (or in some rare cases, good). TRIGGERS FOR SUICIDE, MENTAL HEALTH, AND DYSMORPHIA 

-bruce trying to kill himself in the beginning of the movie. 

Hes reckless, and willing to risk his life, but not suicidal. But he just purposefully gets into a wreck at 2 minutes into the movie?? for no reason??? theres literally no reason for it other than it being angsty bc they COULDVE started the movie with the mutants doing crime, as the next scene cuts right into it and the following news reports 

-"This reporter hopes that wherever he is, hes enjoying a toast with good friends" said when its the anniversary of batman’s disappearance 

this is stupid I hate this movie. You're telling me Gotham forgives Batman for just disappearing on them? DID THAT NOT HAPPEN IN NML AND EVERYONE GOT PISSED??? Like everyone in this movie seems to have forgot he abandoned the city. Not to mention, and I'm gonna go off on a tangent here, bruce will be batman for as long as he lives. He calls himself batman in his mind even when hes retired. He believes that Bruce wayne is the mask. His whole identity is batman. Saying that hed quit because of jason is not only stupid because it implies Jason's death isnt just as important as his parents, but shows that any tragedy is enough to permanently knock him down. And as if the league, or the family, would have let him give up. Anyway the whole reason the retirement in batman beyond works is because it shows bruce was going to fight until he literally died on the spot, but instead he pointed a gun, didn't even use it, just pointed it, and he realized he wasnt fit to HONOR batman anymore. He broke the rule. And he doesnt deserve to wear the mantle. This is so good because 1) bruce still wants to be batman and 2) it doesnt imply that he gave up at all, and at this point with his decreasing wellness his family WOULD be telling him to stop

-Gordon toasts with Bruce on the anniversary

FBKSBSOANSISSB OH MY GOD IT JUST SHOWED HIM SHARING A TOAST WITH GORDON. this is the anniversary of the last time batman is sighted and gordon. JIM FUCKING GORDON. Is celebrating. When they were literally partners and hed shine the batsignal each night TELL ME WHERE THE LOGIC IS!!! I CANT FIND THE LOGIC!!!!! I'm literally 3 minutes into this movie..... and already this is how its going...

-Gordon and Bruce talk

"You're not worried about me, are you?" Asked when hes in clear danger of being attacked by mutants "noT MorE tHAn i aM tHe ReST oF tHis CItY" ah yes. I forgot that Bruce hated gotham and jim Gordon. My mistake. Common misconception.

-the mutants are introduced

Ugh and it's the worst kind of villains too, jim just described the mutants as "the worst kind of criminals. They are only after violence, with no humanity at all" GIVE! VILLAINS! REASONING! I hate these joker wannabes Joker was already enough we dont need a million more "lol I'm just evil deal with it" villains

"Talk to Dick lately?"asks Gordon "You know I havent" Bruce responds

THIS CONVERSATION IS GETTING W O R S E BC I KNOW HOW THIS MOVIE GOES AND HE JUST INSTANTLY HAS CARRIE BE THE NEW ROBIN- WHICH, IS N O T BRUCE'S TO GIVE. ITS ALWAYS BEEN DICK'S MANTLE TO PASS DOWN- WHEN HE HASNT BEEN SPEAKING TO DICK????

-tangent on how it’s overlooked that Dick Grayson was the one to make Robin, not Batman

This is a sin that not just the movie, but the batman franchise in general seems to always make. Robin was made as a tribute to the flying graysons, and is meant to be colorful and aerodynamic for acrobatic tricks. it should always be dick’s to pass down, or the next robin after. 

-Bruce begins having trouble with holding back his urge to be Batman

His whole wanting to be batman again thing started because of a newspaper with a family's death and pearls being sold. On the same front cover. I'm. THATS WHEN HE REMEMBERS HIS PARENTS? NOT EVERY FUCKING TIME HE HEARS A GUNSHOT? OR CLOSES HIS EYES? OR SEES BLOOD? HE READS A NEWSPAPER THATS FLOATING IN THE WIND??????NOT EVERY TIME HE LOOKS AT JASONS COSTUME? OR THE OTHER CRIMES COMMITTED??????LOGIC!!!!!!!!!! I NEED !!!! TO KNOW!!!!! WHERE IT IS!!!!!!!! ARE U KIDDING ME NOW THE MARK OF ZORRO, WHICH IS WHO THE FUCK KNOWS HOW OLD NOW, IS ON TV??????????? AND HE JUST HAPPENS TO FLIP TO THE CHANNEL.. Batman telling bruce "you've tried to hold me back. But you're weak. Ypu know it in your soul. You're nothing but a hollow shell." Is so STUPID!! WHY HAS HE BEEN FIGHTING BEING BATMAN!!!!!!!!!! BRUCE SHOULD WANT TO BE BATMAN!!!! AND HATE HAVING TO NOT BE!!!! AND A BAT FLYING INTO HIS WINDOW AGAIN???? STOP THE FUCKING CLICHES IM SICK OF THIS . UR NOT BEING NEXT LEVEL, MOVIE. ITS JUST DUMB. ITS DUMB!!!

-Carrie Kelly

her first ??? Appearance??? Is her going into KNOWN MUTANT GANG TERRITORY instead of going through the rain. And scolding her friend for not having backbone WHEN THEY COULD LITERALLY DIE and saying, and I quote, "its better than out there." then when interviewed about the incident her friend says  "It was a flying monster! With wings and fangs!" and she replies with "Reality check, Michelle, it was definitely a man, but he had to be like 12 feet tall" OH YEAH THATS VERY REALISTIC CARRIE. Shes an asshole to her friend and we're supposed to like her.  Oh and Carrie's reason for wanting to be robin? She saw the bat signal while her parents were talking about public marches. That's it. That's her reason. Not because she was attacked by mutants and almost died.

-Giving the movie credit

Okay but if theres another thing I'll give credit for, and I'm sure its unintentional, is that Harvey is the first criminal he wants to take down. Because Harvey is always going to be Bruce's priority. He didnt go after the mutants, but Two-Face. And the way that confrontation goes when it’s revealed harvey thinks both sides of his face are scarred. the Arkham staff fixed his scars before he was ready for treatment, and his mental health wasn’t priority. he was going to have dysmorphia either way, but not treating mental illness worsened it.  kinda? good writing? But I think it was unintentional to have the idea that Arkham didnt know what they were doing and the belief that scars are important before trauma, and how trauma has to be helped first. I dont believe for an instant that's what's meant. 

-Carrie Kelly part two

She gets a Robin costume and goes out onto the roof and is like.... almost dies. THEN THE NEXT SCENE WE SEE HER SHES LIKE COMPLETELY ACROBATIC? WHY IS SHE SO ACROBATIC NOW!!! THIS TAKES PRACTICE!!!

-Batman confronting the man who supplied the mutant gang with guns

Oh, this scene...He hands a guy a gun, knowing full well that he was depressed because his wife was dying and he had to make more money to save her by supplying the mutants with weapons, and just walks away as he kills himself. (input from a friend which i like:  think about everything bruce did to help mr freeze and his wife now think about this scene )

Batman vs Mutants 

oh, and the "batmobile". Aka his tank. Rubber bullets. Ok fine, whatever, but RUNNING THEM OVER AND SHOOTING MISSCLES ISNT LETHAL? AND HOW IS CARRIE KELLY GOOD AT FIGHTING ALL OF THEM WHEN SHE COULDNT HANDLE HERSELF WITH ONE LIKE A WEEK AGO.  hate that the mutant leader is just a ripoff of bane with long pointed nipples I hate this. I hate that batman cant take him down, but carrie kelly can. AND THE MUTANT LEADRER TOTALLY DIED WHEN BRUCE THREW ADHESIVE ON HIS FACE AND HE WAS SUFFOCATED BUT LATER ON IT SHOWS HE LIVES ??

Bruce talks to Carrie 

"What is this thing?" -carrie "Dick called it the batmobile" -bruce "SIR!!" -alfred over the radio There are no words. Then she pops his arm into place and creates a makeshift cast And he says "where'd you learn to do that?” and because she’s a mary sue she says nothing, because miller doesnt know why she should, so he cuts to "what's your name?" and she says "Carrie. Carrie Kelly. robin" and HE FUCKING GOES "MINES BRUCE." and then immediately tells Alfred hes bringing "robin" to the cave. I hate it here I hate that he forgets what happened to Jason aFTER ITS HIS LITERAL REASON FOR QUITTING. WHAT IS THE POINT IF HE’S GOING TO ACCEPT THIS GIRL HE DOESNT EVEN KNOW AS ROBIN?

-Bruce talks about Jason

OH BRUCE'S FUCKING LINE. HIS LINE. IM FURIOUS Alfred asks "have you forgotten what happened to Jason?" And he says "I'll never forget. he was a good soldier. He honored me" I AM !!!! SHAKING!!!! WITH HOW MAD !!!! I AM!!! Bruce would NOT say that shit. Implying that jason wasnt his son, or that jason was only a casualty in a war, or that HE FUCKING HONORED HIM AND NOT THE CITY, OR THE TITLE OF ROBIN "He honored me" shut the fuck up I hate this and dont even get me started on the misconceptions of Robin in the first place. i dont want to go into the debate on whether or not they’re soldiers, which I personally don’t believe. but its just stupid because Jason considered being Robin the best thing that’s ever happened to him, and he was THE BEST. it wasnt his fault he was killed, either. 

-The ending

So the mutant escapes his cell by going through a VENT. A . V E N T. AND ENDS UP IN THE SEWER. I hate that these mutants are just an army of evil people and have no motivation and the leader is just a brute I fucking hate Bruce calling him "son" And the mutants become the sons of batman who fight crime......??? because their leader is gone?? werent they supposed to be evil criminals with no humanity in them?

-Joker

Okay but Joker being absent the entire first part , only to show up in the end hearing news reports about batman, and then smiling as he stands up and just fucking creepily says "darling" holy shit that gave me goosebumps. another credit i have to give. 

[xxxtoony-brosxxx]

Haha some backstory bits for ZT

I looked at my self in the puddle of blackness surrounding me, but i couldn't see well...who am i? Im me, I'm Ezekiel...right? No,my eyes adjusted to the darkness, who? The reflection isnt me.

"Well well well, looks whose awake! If it isn't my project, ZTS05!"

The lights in the room flashed on and I see my dead body across the room from me... blood pouring from my body's eyes with the chest open revealing no heart

"N-no, this is just a nightmare!" I hold this new body's head feeling shaken up from the sight.

"My name isn't ZTS0 whatever! I'm Ezekiel!"

"No, not anymore can't you see, it was never meant to be. You won't be missed, you're uncle kicked ya out, your boyfriend and you dont get along, your family never wanted you. You had no one! Perfect for this experiment!"

"Wha- no! What am I?!"

"Now I have mastered the power of making a body out of a nonliving substance using a soul! How rich I'll be! Life forever through transfer! Well, these new bodies can die...but the transfer can continue as long as a soul exist."

I'm no longer Ezekiel... "N̸̐̉o̵̎̾ ̵̓̕ỳ̶̇o̷̕͝u̸̒̀ ̴̒́ä̶́̓r̴̓̀ẽ̵̉ ̶̀̓ṅ̴͝o̸̐̎ť̶̀"

...

I wake up in a cold sweat, glad that the rest of what happened didn't continue. I'm not Ezekiel, I'm now ZTS05 an experiment, a freak.

…

"How could you do this? Cato she was a kid! Not even an adult yet! How does this not bother you? To experiment this with a child?"

"He is almost was adult only a few months until, he, would be 18."

"He?"

"Yes he. So...you approve of this, only if it was an adult? Killing if fine to you?"

"Th-thar's not what I meant..."

"But thats what you said."

"..."

"ZTS our 5th attempt, ZTS05."

"How will you make..."him"...well stable? Haven't you seen how "he" is? How unstable?"

"I have my ways, if this works we can be something great! Now set up the room for the experiment."

"Yes sir..."

…

"Cato! He's doing it again!"

"What?"

"He's going crazy again! He killed three of our staff!"

"How? We chained him, muzzled him, and put one of those body things on him?"

"I-I don't know! I go to check on him and there was three dead bodies he glared over at me! I panicked and ran! I don't know if he got out...we was still chained..."

"Then go close the damn door! We cant have him escaping hes not ready yet!"

"Y-yes sir..."

…

The blasted demon took over me again, now they are hurting me...

"STOP IT BURN *gurgle* ST-STOP!!!"

They put me in a tank when I was half concious it was filled with holy water

"*cough cough* AHHHHHHH!!! PLEASE!"

I cried and screamed and struggled as multiple men were forcing me in the water causing me extreme pain

"You've done this to yourself"

"*hic* YA KNOW I CAN"T CONTROL IT *gurgle* PLEASE!!!! ARRGGHHHHH!!! *hic* AHHH!!!"

The water around me started to turn black from my slowly melting form I was in so much pain but they didnt stop

"*huff huff* PL-PLEASE!!! *hic* I-ITS TOO MUCH!!!"

The tears burned my eyes with the water they continued this until I passed out

...

"The poor thing..."

who-

"Hes evil he deserved it."

"He was made this way it wasnt his choice, look at him!"

I was on the floor surrounded by a huge puddle I was so tired and weak and in so much pain, I didn't dare move

"Please...not *hic* again...*sobs* please!"

"*gasps* Oh the poor creature!"

I notice the the man with her was one of the men, I felt the change start, I mentally screamed for it to stop then blackness

...

I was in the form of the blasted demon, I towered over the woman quietly, she shook in fear...please...i didnt mean to, i thought, as if she knew what i was thinking she relaxed,

" I̶͋͊ ̵̊͂d̶̀̓ỉ̶̖d̷̋̉n̵̈́͌'̵́͌t̸̔̅ ̷̬̚m̵̆͘ȩ̸̇a̴̓̔n̸̿̈́ ̵̪͘t̸̩͒o̷͚͛ ̸̤̆i̴̛̊m̷͋̋ ̷̪̐ș̶͂ȏ̸͑ŗ̴̅r̴̡͊ŷ̷̕!̸́̆ "

I went on my knees and wrapped my arms around her the form melting away, as I sobbed sore from everything, it took awhile but she hugged back

...

why did she hug back?

…

After putting me in the tank they thought how would it be like if they put me in a pentagram as tests to see my weaknesses

"*gurgle, drip drip* Ugh...pl-please *huff huff* s-so weak..."

"Well we need to know what harms you."

"Mgghh *gurgle* its l-like im drowning...in myself..."

"Interesting..."

"Please stop-"

I flop over trembling feeling weak, dizzy, like im drowning in my own liquids, head pounding...

"No, this is what Cato called for until you pass out. To see how long it'd take you to go out"

I continue to tremble more...

" Mmmm- *cough cough* i-its terrible- *gags* why do you do this..."

"It's my job."

My head began to pound more

"*whimper* M-my head-"

I try to reach for it but I was chained and couldn't reach as I look at the man wondering how someone is ok with seeing someone else's suffering as the pulsing pain got worse

"Please! *vomit* mmmf- *vomit* h- *huff huff huff*"

"I-"

"*whimper whimper* I've been good- for a whole month please- the demon hasn't hurt no one- *whine*"

"..."

I felt my body grow unstable and it hurt like hell

"PLEASE! STOP!"

He just writes something down as I feel my body melt away, I knew if I wanted this to stop I'd have to pretend to pass out not sure if I could but I tried

"...PLE-"

I pretend to pass out trembling and trying not to make any noise though it hurt so much it was hard but it was an attempt

"Hey! He's out get someone in here! He looks unstable! He could die!"

It worked-

I hold myself in place trying not to go stiff though all I wanted to do was scream curling up in a ball I try to slowly control my breathing as someone unchains me in my unstable postition I managed to pretend to be limp the hardest thing I think I've ever done

But at least I was out of there, I fall asleep tired but at least it wouldn't be so bad I guess as staying there until I pass out...

…

"We all walk amougst the angels and demons of this world...we see them like normal...but I dont, I see different people...but as of I, im a monster...a being of three worlds, but display two, that appears to others as one. A creature of sickness that should not be, a creature whose origins should be forgotten yet remain. I'm a monster...but that doesn't mean I hate it. I was never meant to be who I was, but I am not meant to be who I am. Perhaps this is for the better...I was weak, feeble, a fragile human, but now I fight back, I won't be mistreated as I once was. Thanks to you...but this curse shall not sprawl the world and be used as a cure for your weakness. The need for power and immortality, especially not for people like you...toxic human…

"W-wait no! Don't do this! I'm sorry!"

"Its too late...what has been done is done...good bye!~"

"AHHHHHHHH-"

"Its time for sleep. Enjoy your rest eternal.~"

I shift forms letting all of our anger out when I was through the room was a blood bath and I was covered in the substance, I look down at his battered body shredded to bits one of his cold dead eyes out of its socket staring at me as if accusing me of something, perhaps it’s just the inner guilt of what I did talking but I swear those eyes were going to haunt me forever, forever reminding me of my awful deeds I sigh softly and think to myself…

He'll never be able to hurt anyone ever again...I look down at the floor and go to open the floor boards lifting out a knife, "You poisoned me...for the money old friend, now I am your fucking cursed sickness that lives on, til I die, well i chose to live, i am the violence you created me to be! Toxic toxic toxic...it was fun to watch you beg for forgiveness...perhaps I am the villian now. But the fault is none of mine."

ŝ̴̊h̴̊̎i̸̐́ ̵̆͘e̷͆͘t̶͊̇a̵͋͝h̴͒͝ē̶̕s̵̄̾ ̸͑͘z̷̍́i̵̒̂ ̵̑̒ỏ̸̔e̵͌̕'̵͋͝r̴̄͠y̴̋̕u̸͋͗ ̵́̿r̷͑̔b̵̿̈l̵̆͗e̷͂͒p̵̀̔o̴̿͝m̴̛̚ ̸̓̆e̸͂͗ť̵́y̸̒̾ ̵́̓f̵̀̿i̷̅͐ ̴̊͗l̶͛͝i̵͌̑f̷̌̋ů̷͗l̸̈͋s̶̆͗l̷̂̓ ̵̈́͒v̸̊̀ỳ̷̈́o̴̍̉ ̸̀͘

[juni-ravenhall]

im gonna start this year actually watching the horse drawing tutorial series i bought some months ago but didnt have enough spoons (meaning energy) to study from!!!

i mean ill prob only get thru a part of the first vid but i want to try to get through the whole series over the next months and improve at drawing and modelling horses!!!!!!!

i will fill out my own horse art style meme too while i study, but it might take a while ofc. basically everything for me takes like 100 times more time and energy than it does for someone whos not sick, so when i say like “ill try doing x challenge” or “heres my to-do list” its with keeping in mind that even if i aim to do something in 1 month it might take 10 months.... but this is fine all that matters is that im alive!

all that matters is our health, at the end of the day thats all we have, so make sure to get enough sleep, water and nutrients in 2021. its ok to skip school or be late on work or whatever it may be if you need that break to protect your health. its ok to not reply to people if you feel like you cant and you need a social break. its not your fault if you feel exhausted or have anxiety. love and protect yourself this year!!!

also if all u rly care about is horses thats ok!!! i just want to put this here bc honestly it took me so long to fully realise that im still as much of a horsegirl (old man) as i was when i was 8 and in the past couple years ive been actively reading horse fiction books targeted to kids (and ofc most horse games r targeted to kids too) bc it makes me happy. u dont have to feel weird about being “childish” whether its about horses or any other interest. just enjoy urself and love what u love.

and if anyone set a new years resolution about things i happen to know about like drawing, animation, 3D, and other random creative stuff lol, feel free to write to me if u feel stuck or need help! i like talking about projects and im one of those ppl who watches a million tutorials and am good at finding information (bc high Te out of being intj dfkjhg) so i can help u find tutorials or other resources u need if u struggle with a creative interest ❤️

[rensflr]

Post essay 👀

oh god since you asked for it-

before i start this, i just want to say that i’m not trying to start discourse or anything. i honestly do not care if the creators of that post see this or know about this or whatever, i just want to talk about the specific things that bothered me because when i am upset i have to get my thoughts out. so scroll past if you don't care as this post is long (this is also going to be very incoherent as it is 2am)

1. this is just nitpicky but this person says if you can't have a job you shouldn't engage in nsfw stuff but like. 16-year-olds can have jobs. my 16-year-old friends have jobs. tommy can have a job (i mean, he already does). also, surely if tommy is ‘too young’ to be interacting with people who make nsfw jokes, the op of that post is too? considering they're a minor, i feel like according to their rules they shouldn’t be watching that stuff at all. unless you want every single person to wait until their 18th birthday to Use the Internet, i feel like this point falls apart quite quickly. the second person says that people like tommy will make younger kids want to get into streaming, but ask any creator when they started making youtube videos and the answer will be quite young! also, that is not his fault.

2. i don't know if i’ll be able to explain my thoughts about this point perfectly, but the way they talk about adhd makes me feel weird lmao. he is not making hyperfixating seem like the solution to everything! a person with adhd publically displaying their symptoms of adhd and in general just....having adhd is not glorifying it whatsoever! techno would have hyperfixated on that stuff regardless of if he had an audience because that's what people with adhd do! we fixate on things for hours at a time because that's just how our brains work. i’ve farmed wheat for hours in minecraft in order to make as much bread as possible just because my brain felt like it that day. it is not his fault whatsoever if people see him hyperfixating on things and copy him because he is not advocating for people to do that. also, the second person saying for techno to not do something if it makes him stressed while also using it as an example of a hyperfixation is....weird. sometimes people with adhd hyperfixate on things we really don't want to and we have little control over it! and maybe techno hyperfixating on things isn't teaching adhd kids to glorify their hyperfixations maybe it's.....showing them that its ok to do that! it's okay that sometimes you focus on silly or inconsequential things. it can be unhealthy for us, but seeing someone else do it makes me feel not so alone. someone having adhd and living their life with adhd is not an endorsement! also he’s not teaching people that bullying=funny. not to sound harsh, but i beg you to examine your own friendships and realize that that's just how friends Are.

3. WHO fucking cares. seriously who gives a shit if wilbur soot is gay. other than the people who are weird about gay men. also how the fuck do you ‘present as bi’! what does that even mean! someone being slightly feminine and comfortable making jokes with his friends does not mean that he is bi and i feel like thinking that is just playing into stereotypes. and for the love of god stop saying that minecraft men are queerbaiting. jesus christ. if someone says they are straight...they aren’t queerbaiting! end of story! jokes are not hints of someone’s sexuality for you to decipher! just because you want someone to be gay or bi or anything else does not mean that they are that thing or have ever tried to convince you that they are. as for the second part of their stuff on wilbur, i can't really say anything because i’m not super involved with his content. so this could or could not be a real issue idk

4......why is this his fault. like genuinely. i don't have much to say on this one because it is not his fault that you are using him as a coping mechanism. it's not his fault that some of his fans have an unhealthy parasocial relationship with him. sorry to say this, but creators are not responsible for their fans’ mental health because - like you said - they don't know you! this is a valid issue and something that happens, but i have no clue why this specific thing makes philza problematic in any way.

anyway, that’s all i have. again, i don’t really give a shit if they see this or not but i wanted to share why i thought that post was so hilariously off the mark. also, i am not coming after the op of that post. they seem like a fine person but i just really disagree with what they said. please dont attack them!

[fthisshiiimout]

" Hope is a dangeous thing" Michael Guerin's words of wisdom! He said it to Max and said it to Maria! But I really hope every single MALEX fan took it to heart cause it was really meant for US!

I dont care what people say in this fandom anymore. "I dont want to hear spoilers" " no spoilers" " you should tag your shit as a spoiler" NO IM NOT GOING TO! Ya know why?? Because Carina herself wouldnt have shown her shit if she didnt want SPOILERS OUT!! DUHH! And Im ranting because Im sick of the headgames with this show..it ridiculous..no wonder why people in this fandom are dropping like flies.

And Im sick and tired of the back and forth between M/M and M/A. Im sick of the headgames with the showrunner as well! One day its " Oh its Maria..shes his light" and whatever else is spewed. And the next its " Ohh Michael and Alex there journey is from darkness to light" and whatever other bullshit is spewed. Cause in reality its all Bullshit to keep Malex fans and Miluca fans to keep watching and fighting. If you ever cared to look at the ratings for season 1 they were abysmal. Only the first 2 episodes got over a million viewers. Which is horrible..but in full disclosure Theres only 1 CW show that has really any kind of following ( and hint hint its not Supernatural..That shows ratings are going down faster then a hooker on payday). Believe me I did the research. I dont understand why they are putting it after a tanking show if they want more viewers ( No disrespect to Supernatural, my daughter and husband love this show). But I digress..

The show runners know where there bread is buttered on this show and it is with MALEX fans. It even overshadows the Liz/Max shippers and Definitely over shadows Michael and Maria. Hell Vlamis and Tyler realized it pretty quickly..Vlamis made a sold out Merch line because of it. And they are the captains of this ship because they see the potential of how big it can be. Hell even the CW pr team figured it out! Thats why in the trailer we saw Malex and no Miluca?? Its not rocket science to figure this out!

So why now are the showrunners literally shitting on the LGBTQ+ community by taking away the only couple that represent that population on that show?? Then placating the community with "ooh Alex gets a new love interest" and the obscure and downright awkward " oh someone who Identified as straight in the beginning of the season will not be at the end". What a FUCKING FARCE! Like really?? As a community are we that desperate or obtuse?? Did nobody roll there eyes at this bullshit? Or am I the only one? We have a perfectly "cosmic" gay ship in front of us! Yes with baggage..no denying that..but thats the drama of TV I get it.

The reason is because the showrunners have no plans to make Malex anymore. There I said it and I SAW IT FIRSTHAND! In 2x01 Michael told Alex straight up they "were done" it was pretty cut and dry and lasted all of 2 mins...good to know Malex fans get two mins of heartbreak..that should tell you something. While Michael and Maria had 3 scenes..maybe more together. Granted they were not together at the end of 2x01 but According to Heather they will be trying to " ignite the spark between them" for the entire season. And that they're love is " exciting and blah blah blah".. No one gives a shit. Least of all me. But you can clearly see thats where its headed.

Also in season 1 there were some big hints too that I myself overlooked but they were glaring but subtle like the Max/Cam love scene intertwined with the Michael/Alex scene and the song playing in the background..that was telling... You dont see Max and Cam together. Or 1x12 prison scene " Cant love me" playing in the background and the words Michael spit at Alex..I dont think they were complete lies. Michael felt them on some lvl. And Alex's own words " Sometimes the world ends with a wimper, Guerin".. Those were all meant for Malex shippers as well.

And what about this "see if we can " be friends" or " we didn't even know each other" bullshit! I hate those lines..Like really?? Michael moved back to Roswell when he was 11..which meant that they went to school and living in a small town grew up together. At least for 7 or so yrs. They must have knew each other just for the simple fact of the Liz/Max dynamic..I grew up in many a small town i know this dynamic well. EVERYONE LITERALLY KNOWS EVERYONE! Maybe they didn't really hook up till the end of senior year. But they knew each other and I can almost bet that Alex admired Michael's protectiveness and Michael admired Alex's strength. And they also must have known about each others abusive pasts to a point..logic dictates that. And relationships have been built and survived on less.And if the showrunners wanted to make them " friends" for a time I could even tolerate it..tolerate being the operative word.

But no Michael's gonna "light the spark" with Maria..because in reality thats what the showrunners want. They dont give a shit about Malex working through their shit like logic adults would. And that's fine It just frustrates me that I was sold a lie..and every Malex shipper was too. Wake up fellow shippers and see it too. Or dont..Lies are comfortable like a warm blanket on a cold night. Everyone has some delusion they cling to..much like hope.

My last frustration with the ending of this ship will be that it is laid solely at Alex's feet. "He kept walking away", " He abandoned Michael for 10 yrs", "He left him behind", "I love him, I probably always will..but hes tied to all these horrible memories in my life. All the things his family did to mine. Coming back to him always feels like a crash landing" or the newest and deepest when Alex was giving him the file from Caulfield " Manes men did this to her".. Its always going to be Alex's fault. I wonder if Tyler knew the full extent of the way Alex was gonna be shit on. I dont think Tyler being openly queer himself would be ok with that kind of representation of the Gay community. Its pretty jarring... Honestly I can almost guarantee they probably " promised" him a more normal gay relationship with this new " character" Forrest. Whatever the case may be its still bullshit. Michael seems to hold no responsibility to it.

And Michael will still get the girl and be in his hetero relationship with Maria..because Im asking the question..is he really bi? Evidence in the show doesn't specifically back that up. The only man we see him with is Alex..I havent heard or seen him with other men. Even Michael himself said "Its just him..screws me up".. So maybe "Pan" is a better description?

So RIP Malex! It was good while it lasted.."cosmic" even..but the showrunners killed you off before you even got the opportunity to take flight! ( This is a rant about the showrunners and writers for the fake promise of Malex. I seriously have no issue with Maria or the actress per se...and if the showrunners wanted M/M they should have just started in Season 1 with them).

[bessmarvins]

For the ask game: 1, 3, & 37 :D

HELLO thank u!!!

1. celeb crush uhhhh i have had so many obsessions over the years but no current ones!! tbh i really can’t think of one rn i know one will probably come across my dash in .2 seconds and ill reblog and tag it but im blanking here. gonna give u a throwback crush and say tim mf riggins in the friday night lights series.

3. OKAY BITCH i just got riled up about something a girl posted on instagram lmao. she was in my sorority and is two years younger than me so she graduated from this yr. she just posted on her story about how people are posting throwbacks to graduation and she said “its truly making the class of 2020 SO SAD that we don’t get to have that same experience” and “if you’re gonna post them, maybe at least wish us well? say something nice? just a thought” like...LMAO bitch?! it’s not my fault coronavirus fucked us over! i haven’t even posted a throwback pic but i think thats so fucking stupid. like sorry your feelings are hurt but people can post whatever they want to reminisce on good times in their lives. we’re ALL missing out on shit because of quarantine, people have lost their jobs, people have lost their lives, people are risking their lives everyday, and your biggest concern is someone made you sad becauese you couldnt walk across a stage? yeah. i get it. it sucks. i’d be pissed too. but i’m also pissed that i pay over a thousand dollars a month in rent for an apartment im not living in right now and i cant see any of my friends lol. you got your diploma, you still graduated. it could be worse. my mom died less than 2 years ago and i was a wreck on sunday, you didnt see me post “could you guys maybe not post pics with your moms on mothers day? it makes me sad” because i’m not a selfish little bitch lol like just stay off social media if it affects you that much. we can’t tiptoe around every single person who follows us to make sure we dont hurt ur lil feelings over something we can’t control. you’ll be fine boo. like “dont post pics of you and your significant other bc im single” lol fuck off. i really am a very sensitive considerate person and i care about other people’s feelings but like??? come the fuck on get some perspective its instagram. would it REALLY make you less upset about the circumstances if they mention you in a post???

UPDATE after i typed all that: she posted another story saying if you post a throwback grad pic and dont mention the class of 2020 in it “you’re very mean.” lmao ok girl didn’t realize it was kindergarten you were graduating from.

37. yes. i was such a goodie two shoes back in the day but i did in fact go to the principals office and get lunch detention for 3 days for forging a signature on my agenda (which served as a hall pass) so i could go to class late while i was just  bullshitting with two of my friends in the bathroom lmao

#another post where alexis brings up her dead mom because i am actually nancy drew reincarnate

[the-coolest-mallard]

Like a Kickass Guy | ASC

Louie gets high at Mei’s party and texts Nemo and Tae.

@justkeepdancing-nemo​ @moon-yeongtae​

Louie: holy shit u guyyyyyy Louie: shit has been going dowwwwwwwwn. Or upside down? down and up really lol Louie: i may not have muscles n shit but guess WHAT I DID Tae: hulked out and killed someone? Louie: woah man no! Duuuuuude have u seen me? impossible Louie: i'm too cute to go to jail yet Louie: i mean EVER Louie: im too cute to go to jail EVER Louie: did a keg stand lol. sorta Tae: whoa nice Tae: how you feelin? Louie: a m a z i n g Louie: you won't BELIEVE how good i am Louie: i felt like IRON - no. i felt like CAPTAIN AMERICA. LIKE A KICK ASS Louie: GUY Tae: nice dude i'm glad ur having fun Tae: is mark there Louie: he was here somewhere. he asked me to come Louie: dunno where he went. maybe he's with johnny idk Louie: but who cares lol Louie: i'm great Louie: no more sads Tae: wow you're really drunk huh? Louie: nooooooooooooo Louie: haha I was gonna drink Louie: but then this weird girl showed up Louie: and now i'm super

Tae: but you said you did a keg stand Tae: that's like drinking isnt it? Louie: is it? i thought it was just a hand stand on a keg lol Louie: who knows? not me Tae: i mean i guess Tae: what weird girl Louie: idk blond. weird. she wanted me to CHEAT ON MARK WTF Louie: i mean she seriously helped me out but also Louie: wtf Louie: weird. so weird. but we went to the bathroom and she Louie: gave me t his stuff n i'm like Louie: wow i mean i can't stop talking Louie: i think I've said some seriously stupid shit Tae: wait Tae: what? Louie: what? i didn't tell you anything stupid did I? Louie: i don't think i did. thank god. imaigngi f i told u that Louie: lololol i'd die forever Tae: louie what are you taking about what stuff Louie: stuff? which stuff Louie: im not tellig Tae: what did she give you Louie: ohhhhhhhhhhh Louie: oh i can tell u that haha Louie: she called it all kinds of weird stuff like snow white or whatever which is bizarre af but whatever Louie: i like sniffed it and it felt super whack Tae: LOUIE WHAT THE FUCK Louie: and then it was like Louie: wow Louie: idk man i wanted to not feel sad and i feel good now Tae: holy shit what the fuck i cannot believe Tae: louie that was so dumb Louie: you're so dumb! Louie: no that's not true Louie: you're my faovriedgof person ever Tae: where the fuck is nemo why isn't he here to tell you how stupid that was where are you Tae: you're at mei's right Louie: yeh i crashed lol Louie: well no mark and johnny wanted to crash Louie: and since mark's been cool and let me stay at his place i was like Louie: well i should probs go Tae: yeah well THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD'VE FUCKING DONE COKE OR WHATEVER YOU DID jesus fuck Nemo: wait wtf did i just read Tae: yeah Tae: i have to go fucking get him Louie: why are you maddddd? im not bugging anyone! i'm having fun! Nemo: wait whats going on! Nemo: louie are you okay? Louie: i'm FINE Louie: i'm super Nemo: he did cocaine? Louie: super human Tae: he's at mei's party and he fucking YES Louie: you could say Louie: ughhh stop making this so big Tae: do you know how many kids my brother had to see in the hospital bc of drugs louie? Nemo: yeah that stuffs really bad Nemo: its human chemicals Nemo: do you feel okay? are you dizzy? Louie: do you know what else is bad? life. being sad. freddie mercury leaving too soon. presidents. earthquakes Nemo: louie D: Louie: tthe hunger games Tae: hey louie seriously how are you feeling like Tae: in your body Louie: that's a weird thing 2 akks dud Louie: im fine! Tae: okay but like Tae: if u close ur eyes and like idk try to feel what's happening like is your heart beating really fast? do you feel like puking? do you feel like you're moving? Louie: oh i mean yeah lol Louie: my heart is skipping faster n when i Louie: wait i gotta shut up shut up Nemo: tae yah is that bad? Nemo: would jun hyung know? Tae: i'm asking him right nwo Louie: so fussy you guys are fussy im gooood Nemo: louie just keep texting u ok Louie: look how good i am Louie: 

Nemo: very pretty Tae: yeah gorgeous how's your breathing Louie: wouldnt u like 2 kno Louie: how's your butt Louie: bet its still kicckable Tae: you have literally never kicked my ass at anything Tae: nemo does your appa know about this stuff? you probably shouldn't ask him huh? Louie: DON'T AOISFJPDOGN Nemo: its human drugs Nemo: so not really Louie: 4 THE LOV OF GOD Louie: that guy lredy probs haaaaaates me Nemo: his magic wouldnt work either i dont think Louie: im a toxin to freidn parnets Nemo: yeah if he ever finds out we woudl be banned from being in the same school i think he'd transfer me to that catholic place and appa hates catholicism Nemo: this is why you shouldnt do drugs louie :heart: dont yu wanna keep being my friend Louie: :cry: :cry: :cry: Louie: you're my best mate wgodidpsdggdfh Louie: you too tae Tae: wow rude Tae: oh okay Louie: wow Louie: dont be such a bitch tae Tae: well you started it when you did cocaine Louie: i used to think u were the coolest but maybe  im demoting u n promoing Louie: nemo Louie: nemo ur the new hottie Tae: the what Louie: what? Tae: louie i'm coming to get you Louie: whyyyyy the partys still partying Louie: ppl be FITIN Louie: man ud fit right in with your muscle bod Louie: well cept one fitghts girls Tae: where are you in the house Louie: idk the dance place. the life space Louie: where everyone is? Nemo: is jun going too? Nemo: aghaldkfjaskldfj Tae: yeah Louie: wait wait wait wait wait Nemo: ugh im sorry i cant be there Louie: where u going Nemo: louie im so sorry just keep texting us Louie: no Louie: i should dkslefadkad Tae: hey louie what's your favorite queen song Louie: skedlolde Louie: what? ohhhhh wow tough choice man i mean Louie: there are soooo many good SONGS Louie: lately i've been listening 2 somebody to love a lot cause i been dfpsogdpsjsd Louie: buuuuuut Tae: i like don't stop me now Louie: that's my OTHER FAVORITE Louie: man u vibe so well with me i hate it Louie: ha ha ha Louie: j k this is why we're bffs Nemo: hey queen was on the CD you gave me Nemo: ive been listening to it! Louie: reallyyyyy? did you like it? Louie: hey hey tae tae. taeeeeeeee. tae you should send a slefdie Louie: slefit Louie: sel fie Nemo: course! i love it Nemo: maybe i'll pick a song and choreo a dance for it Tae: you want a selfie? Louie: oooooo yes please nemo Louie: and def yes pls tae Louie: do smehthing cute Nemo [deleted]: ugh louiealkf Nemo: where's mark again? Nemo: im gonna text mark Louie: idkkkkkkk Tae: 

Louie: he went to do some stuff with johnny Louie: woahhhhhhhhh Louie: waogdisjdpsgjosg Louie: shit Tae: that's me coming to get ur dumb ass Louie: wait ur coming to get me? Louie: shit shit shit wait i gotta skedoled Louie: skedadled Tae: what? Louie: well much as i think ur great im ok Louie: also i thinkk hoooo shit Louie: gotta ifnd a window lol Tae: louie if you don't stay there i will fucking murder you Tae: i'm serious Louie: deth by tae or tdeth by uncle d when he fins out Louie: shit mn if i stay its a double featur Nemo: :/ Nemo: please louie, we're worried about you Nemo: we love you! we just want to make sure you're okay Tae: yeah Tae: you're gonna stay the night with me okay Louie: oh god Tae: it'll be great Louie: hahaahahahahahaha Louie: N E M O Louie: tell him why i suddenly Louie: sgosigdsgsdg Nemo: louie  i think you should Nemo: um drink water Louie: im good ill just find Louie: makr Louie: mark Nemo: that's also good please find mark Louie: n go to his place? Tae: what did i say Nemo: nothing he's on drugs Tae: i said stay put Louie: im really good thouuuugh Louie: n mark will look out for me Louie: marks nce Tae: well mark left u alone and you did cocaine so i mean not that that's his fault i'm just saying Nemo: ugh what if mark did cocaine Nemo: u dont think mark did cocaine did he Louie: dont blae me him 4 ME BEING ME Tae: DID MARK DO COCAINE Louie: honestly i dont dieossgodkh Louie: NO Tae: fuck Nemo: he might not have! we dont know Louie: i dont deesrve mrk naywayl ol Tae: nemo never do cocaine please Nemo: i cant see mark lee doing cocaine unless someone told him it was fun dip Louie: he n johnny were just doing fun stuff 2gether Tae: lmfao Nemo: id probably DIE if i did cocaine so dont worry ahha Nemo: big no no for fairies Louie: speaking of immenditd death Louie: we sure windows r no go Nemo: which is why u shouldnt do it solidarity c'mon louie Tae: if you aren't there when i get there i will be very upset Nemo: he will be Nemo: wont u louie Louie: im scared i dont want the lady 2 yell at me Louie: pls i wanna leave Tae: I'm almost there Louie: DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD= Louie: what if i hid in the bathroom Nemo: its gonna be okay louie :heart: Nemo: just um, sing a little queen Louie: no its not ill be ded 4ever n dragged home n stuck with my asshole fam n never escape n ded Nemo: you won't be dead you'll be safe Louie: shit someone said its the COPS Louie: im double triple dead Louie: n thats bullshit Louie: my fam isnt safe they suuuuuuuck Tae: WHERE ARE YOU Tae: fuck there are so many people Louie: trapped in the prison of xistance Louie: a house of horrs Louie: horors Tae: i'm serious louie i can't find you Louie: just make urself taller Louie: ill see you Tae: i'm gonna yell for you Louie: ok ok ok Nemo: ugh fksjf