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#okay its not wasted but MAN
threestripeslider · 1 year
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Idk if you'd be interested (or if someone's already asked you lol), but we've been using aggie.io to put our peepaws into that new spiderverse meme if you feel like joining in the fun
OUGH THAT SOUNDS SO FUN but unfortunately i have to concentrate on my schoolwork rn bc i know if i get distracted there's no going back HJDBJFJBK you guys have fun tho!! and thank you for inviting me😌✨
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knicks-knacks · 1 month
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billf0rd shippers still insufferable I see
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bmpmp3 · 2 months
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yesterday in vocal synth news
#art#traditional art#fountain pen ink#virvox project#mizusawa takuto#voicevox#ia#cevio#voisona#also miku is there technically kind of. shes down there#sorry im not a piapro or vocaloid user i was more focused on the other things LOL#looks neat tho! im very curious about the kaito and meiko remasters#i was always tempted and curious but im not a huge fan of the weakness of their v3s compared to their v1s#so i hope we get some demo videos or something soon. or if not i hope in a month people post lots of videos LOL#also intrigued by miku nt update and v6 ai. i have no interest personally in using miku but im sure it'll be interesting#gumi and galaco v6 sound pretty good in my humble onion so im very curious#but anyway. back to ME hjkfsjhjrfds im so excited for takutos voice#itll be cute seeing all the little skits the japanese fans make and for me specifically you KNOW im gonna get on that song shit#im gonna make.... the most bizarre boyband on earth. there is some manner of catboy. and a 50 year old man. it'll be great#maybe i'll remake the yume no tobira cover hee hee#and ia.... oh baby ia.... im so happy you have no idea man i have been WAITING FOR THIS. okay please dont kill me for this but like#highkey i dont really care for her original v3 LOL its not bad or anything i just find a lot of v3 fem vocals sound like the same person#and this was painful for me because like im a gigantic lia fan. i dont need it to be a 1 to 1 recreation or anything but like#i was always so bummed out how thin ia's voice sounded. it felt like a bit of a waste how much the v3 noise removed all lia's warmth#and like the depth of her tone. and like it sounds fine. she sounds like a slightly more operatic miku when people tune her high and breath#which is very common and that sounds fine. but like i still felt like auauuuuuuuuhhhhhhh nothing i loved about lia's voice is there#cevio 1.0 was a step up it brought back a LOT of warmth (although you had to really push up the alpha to get the depth)#and while i personally dont hate the cevio 1 noise its nice to have a version that no longer sounds underwater <3#she sounds so rich now.... i still bump up the alpha a bit because i like lia's deeper work a lot LOL but its wonderfullllllllll#so good so so so so good im obsessed. yesterday was truly an Event for vocal synth news
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mithomite · 6 months
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had the most braindead repetitive conversation/argument with my parents. buzz cuts are too masculine but if you dye a design on it it become effeminate which is bad because then you look weak and if youre weak then society falls apart (all societies ever that have fallen apart for any reason are actually because of feminine men) and we start sacrificing babies. and also all mental illness is invented because only 4 people had anxiety in the 90s and covid was made up so that we would all become gay and trans and then the government can control us better and be joe biden's little sex slaves. and also i need to keep my hair long because my father finds it attractive. what
#lolaa.txt#what do i even tag this with . my mother wouldn't let me leave and i kept asking for sources and she kept saying 'i'm your mother!!!'#'i wouldnt lie to you!'#okay. say that to someone maybe who doesnt know you lie to them all the time.#its tiring going around in circles with her.my father is better because at least he admits when he doesnt have a reason for feeling some wa#also what got me. she said 'do you own research if you want!! but im right!!!'#yeahh not seeing anything about anything you just said. i think you made that up.#i have a theory that my mother secretly hates herself because she believes all women are weak and must serve strong men#and my father has so so much trauma and anxiety that he cant be that strong man#so now she feels like shes betraying her very biology when she has to step up.#and also because i am stronger than her now and my hair is long and far far denser than hers and i have a younger face#that she feels that im wasting my precious femininity that she could be using. does that make sense.#shes so miserable trapped in her idea of what makes a man and a woman what they are. once you stop caring about what makes someone somethin#you dont have to worry about anyone else.#im queer because i dont really feel that connection to biological and social ideas of gender that my parents seem to#never really have#im not gonna theorize 'ohh shed be happier nonbinary' or stuff like that because it is up to you and you alone to define who you are#if you spend your whole life trying to fit a box for the sake of fitting the box#then when would you have any space for self discovery#youve invented personality traits to go along with your box. now you can never ever change or grow as a person. congrats#and you know what? one day she will die. and that will be the end of that.#and i will live and i will probably shave my head a thousand times. and come up with new names#and new ways to be a better person that makes me feel happy#and i will dress like a boy because its all made up anyways. who cares.#and if you care? that much about what im wearing or how i look?#then thats your problem and i wont be responsible to maintain your happiness.#SORRY RANT OVER.#im just so flabbergasted. what a sad life someone can lead poisoned by jealously and reactive rhetoric.#tw homophobia#tw transphobes
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tangledinink · 11 months
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I relate to the
“I have things to do, better take my medication”
“but I need to eat”
“Okay no medicine”
“but things to do-“
loop SO MUCH
I typically just eat right before I take medicine- that doesn’t solve having to cook but you can always just make ramen or get microwaveable meals
I dunno why I sent this- it probably won’t help much- uhh-
yeah no i feel that. = 3 = I try to do that but;;; idk! i feel! bad about only eating dumb microwave meals and stuff. like. i worry about it not being very healthy or financially wise and shit like that, y'know? and then i'll like. be awake in the dead of night trying to fall asleep and be like.
omg.... you know what would be so good...? soup.... i would love to make soup i haven't made soup in forever it's FALL WEATHER i should make SOUP ugh it would be so fantastic i should do that i'll make soup...
but then the morning comes and it's like... ah... well... the desire for soup still somewhat persists, but....
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feralsneeze · 3 months
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Not sneeze just mental health rambling in the tags
#I’ve spent a very long time trying to change my brain so I can just operate at a neurotypical level#it’s always been impossible and I feel like shit for it#so recently I finally just said#I am not neurotypical and never will be no matter what I do!#so I need to be kind to myself and make the accommodations I need for myself!#which is a work in progress but idk. it’s kind of painful that the neurotypical people in my life act like I’m asking for an arm and a leg#when I’m very genuinely asking if slight changes could be made between us#I absolutely don’t expect anyone to change their lifestyle for me or anything#it’s stuff like not holding long conversations when I’m in the middle of writing because it messes up my flow#and I tell my family beforehand! hey I’m gonna write for a couple of hours does anyone need anything from me before#and they say no! but then ten minutes later will start telling me a story about their day#which I’m okay to hear BEFORE I start a writing session or AFTER#and I goddamn communicate that!!! but they act like I’m asking for nobody to ever speak to me again#another thing is that I CANNOT eat anything past an expiration date#I know it’s still probably good but my brain will just keep saying YOURE GONNA DIE OF FOOD POISONING#so say the half gallon of milk is past its date#I will buy a fresh one to start using myself but I don’t toss the old one because I know others don’t care as much#and they they complain that I’m wasting milk#like I’m sorry it’s 1) my money and 2) how is it being wasted when y’all are happy to drink it til it’s done?#idk man!! neurotypical people sure do say that shit should be easy for neurodivergent people#but they sure do struggle to be slightly accommodating without bitching#idk rant over peace out
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toastsnaffler · 3 months
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waking up and remembering I have to live the rest of my life today and tomorrow and so on ☹️
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triglycercule · 18 days
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am i allowed to post headcanons for jk fashion au. will people riot and scream at me not to post because its a waste. this is my own au this would be considered canon (i still have to get used to that. i'm a CREATOR now!). triglycercule this is literally your account why do you worry about if what you post bothers people. idk man i just worry like that,,,, anyways i have so many fucking hcs for jk fashion au that i cant draw without taking an obscenely long time on it so i guess i'm just gonna make this into one big stupid little reblog thread or edit and add onto this when i can (because if i keep making seperate posts about it and then lose track of the hcs i think i'm gonna kill myself) starting with these one :3
jk!nightmare often dances to audios she finds "cool" and stuff like that. i dont know an example of this but just imagine the coolest anime ending or opening soundtrack you could think of. anyways she's not very quiet about this. she sings loudly. and not all that well (NOT THAT SHE HAS A BAD VOICE JUST THAT,,,,, its not the best!) and the dreamtale residence has thin walls. so jk!dream often has to tell her to quiet down because their parents dont wanna hear the noise or whatever. and it turns into a very awkward stareoff between dream and nightmare when dream catches her in the middle of dancing and singing. very awkward. nightmare's eye goes all staremare mode because it would be funny. she's in her "corrupted form" for this so she can get into the right vibes. ans dream just smiles and sighs and offers to dance and sing with her until she gets it right as long as sh lowers the volume. and nightmare is absolutely touched by this because goddamn i would too like,,,,, and then they have a silly dance practice session and sing together sillily and its sweet and cute and amazing and dream is a great dancer ans nightmare isn't sll that good but dream helps her and doesn't judge and thats all nightmare wants (aside from being able to actually get the damn dance move right DAMN IT MOVE FEET!!!! stop dragging around,,,,,)
jk nightmare likes to think she's nocturnal or some bullshit like that. or like she stays up at abyssmal times because the moon is out and the negative energy at night is impeccably high or some cringe shit like that (LMAO) so when she goes to the book club i mean her gang she regularly takes naps there. except she also has a high enough ego not to just sleep on some lousy desk so the jk mtt brought in a beanbag into the clubroom and killer bought their stupid fucking sleeping mask for nightmare to wear. the design on it is up to interpretation but i like to think its like two giant googly eyes looking in opposite directions but like totally bedazzled because jk nightmare wants nothing less
like this! except i totally just fucking stole this from honkai impact but it fits okay it fits
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anyways naptime for jk nightmare :3 and then when she wakes up the clubroom is in like total disarray with horror chasing killer for some bullshit she pulled and dust trying to flip over all the flipped over desks and shes just like what the fuck happened while she was asleep. cant do NOTHING with these damn goons of hers she should've hired others (theyre yiur friends silly dont be like that,,,,)
jk killer does those "today's mission" tiktoks. i've had this on my mind but it clicked for me that jk killer would do this when the mission for the day (i think this was yesterday) was to casually mention in conversation that you shit yourself. THIS ONE https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTNoDfpJt/ its such a funny fucking idea i can just imagine the absolute DISGUST EVERYONE would show on their faces. even dream frowns at killer and shes supposed to be perfect 😭😭😭
jk killer forces horror and dust to be in her selfies or videos or whatever the hell she wants to post but neither of them want to be shown online but she also wants to show off her fun moments with her totally cool best friends so she spends a lot of time manually editing emojis over their faces. even the videos. all of them
when jk dream comes to visit the gang and the clubroom usually the gang is in the middle of some sort of chaos and nightmare want to appear calm and collected and cool infront of her little sister so she immediately tries to get the trio to settle down. jk mtt still crack jokes at her expense though
jk dust and jk dream exchange letters with eachother. why? idk i just think that dream would collect those wax seal things (nightmare uses them too but dream's the main collector) and she needs to use them and dust has an interest in stationary so wax sealed letters,,,, stationary,,,, PEN PALS!!! they both have pen pal nicknames for eachother although i cant come up with them rn so whatever its up to interpretation
jk horror often just like. spots jk dream. like out in the wild for no reason its kind just like encountering a pokemon except ive never interacted with any pokemon content so i dont know much about how wild interactions like that go. anyways usually dreams doing some sort of vollunteer work and horror just comes up to her to causally chat. usually when horror's around others that aren't dust or killer she has to force herself to act nice but with dream she's just so naturally nice that it kinda rubs off on horror and she doesn't really act fake nice,,,, its cute. after dreams doing what they go out for ice cream together because theyre friends ans its cute and horror usually pays because dream does a shitton of work for no pay and she doesn't need more money stolen from her. this one is so cute :3
ok thats all i can think of for now. will be updating soon when i come up with more
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average jk nm's gang conversation (nightmare doesn't know how to continue the sentence she just spoke in her fake fancy talk and the jk mtt are dogging her for it)
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toytulini · 7 months
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god my executive dysfunction is so fucking Bad lately
#toy txt post#so many tasks and dont want to Do anything and like on the one hand Theyre Not That Hard it wont take THAT long i have plenty of time#on the other hand#it will take like 5fucking hrs and if it doesnt i will find a way to make take 5fucking hours and all this and i still havent eaten#enough for breakfast but like??? what am i supposed to waste energy on actually cooking something?#man i love eggs but i think maybe id actually struggle if i had chickens not cos id get tired of eating eggs but cos#all the low effort ways to consume eggs gross me out and the ways i like are not THAT high effort but its too high effort to be#an everyday thing for me :(#okay i have gotta stop thinking about the State Of Things. and figure out a nutrient dense thing to eat for breakfast thats quick and easy#and that i actually like to eat. but also i maybe want coffee so i should not have a clif bar. augh#IT IS 3PM. FUCK. I FUCKING WOKE UP AT LIKE 9!!!!! AND TOOK MY MEDS EARLY AND I STILL END UP NOT DOING FUCKING ANYTHING AT ALL TIL 3PM#i hate this i need to like#fully reset. i need to go to bed at idk. 9pm and wake up at like 5am and get dressed and go out fucking early i hate this!!!!!#i hate !!!! not fucking functioning!!!!!! aaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!#i need a therapist or smth but like one that will find a way to word shit so that it doesnt piss me off and make me want to pettily not do#things that would maybe help#agh#i have been trying to get better about#doing my physical therapy at least
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isdalinarhot · 1 year
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WHY DID SANDERSON WRITE SADEAS IN SUCH A WAY THAT HE SERVES COLOSSAL AMOUNTS OF CUNT!!!!!!!!! WHAT WAS HIS GAME PLAN!!!!!!!!!!! like amaram serves zero cunt roshone doesnt really serve cunt either hes just a sexy bear BUT SADEASW IS S OUT HERE BEING A FUCKING QUEEN AND HE GETS NO RECOGNITION FOR IT HE IS JUST TOSSED TO THE SIDE LIKE HOT POTATOES?????????????????? well here is a hot take i came up with just now. i think he should have been odium instead of taravangians dumb musty crusty dusty ass. because like okay imagine if dalinar ascends and becomes honor. and imagine if sadeas is odium. THATS FU KINCKING JUICY RIGHT??????? THATS TAKING THEIR DIVORCE TO A DEIFIED LEVEL and it will have GRAVE CONSEQUENCES FOR THE COSMERE but noooooo sanderson had to KILL HIM OFF IN AN ALLEYWAY IN BOOK 2. WELL THATS JUST A WASTE OF SADEAS1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! let him be evil and diabolical please please god. but he wont be evil and diabolical because he is dead. fuck this gay earth.
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onawhimsicot · 11 months
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this could have been SUCH a bi-coded anime, but it seems like the gender roles are coming back 😔
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bmpmp3 · 2 years
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plus i always find it pretty disappointing in my beloved media marketed towards women and girls when a leading man has like. no relationships outside the main character. like cmon, not even a complex but intense homoerotic house-wilson style frenemyship with some buddy of his? thats like the bare minimum
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fic #2
A/N: >2.5k words of....somethin. not actually sure what to call this..."Visiting Saturn Overtakes Terra With A Terrible Feeling Of Discomfort Brought About By His Own Mistakes And Control Freak Tendencies" doesn't really have a ring to it. more notes after the end :UUU
--
SRN-006's wing of Starship Sol was very minimalist.
The crown moulding and intricately carved patterns in each nook and cranny of SRN-007's broad and colourful corridors stood in stark contrast to these…neatly grid tile walls and artificial marble floors polished to reflection. A monochromatic, mostly black scheme, with splashes of white for accent.
It was one circular, narrow hall surrounding the repair lab in which he worked, with only purely necessary latitude. Just wide enough to accommodate their largest enlistee and no further.
SRN-006's wing of Starship Sol was too minimalist.
The dim pin lights resting parallel on the bottom of the perimeter were bulbless, caged, and cold. Cameras and sensors abounds sat in little pockets mechanically blocked out of the tile, and they too were black, with tiny red ringed eyes staring, unmoved, at whoever passed.
And then that would draw the attention to the preference of verticality in construction, as those burning lens would still be present the further back you tipped your head. In fact, should you regard them, they would return the favour, ensuring you felt small and out of place.
The ceiling stretched temple-high, and if you chose to follow it to its end, nothing special awaited you at the top. It was the same throughout, if not darker for the lack of mounted lighting.
SRN-006's wing of Starship Sol was beyond minimalist.
In every aspect, he'd wasted his opportunity for expression on barren, and featureless design. Nothing existed for comfort. There were no intentional benches, no decoration, nothing to suggest that anyone with a personality occupied the room in between.
How he managed to use so little of the space allotted to him when drafting, and turn what could have been a gravity-controlled exhibition lobby (per his home planet's aesthetics), into claustrophobic lifelessness was…disappointing.
Moreover, it was uncomfortable.
The experience of passing through this glorified pod bus tunnel was among the many things that made Terra's skin crawl.
He would never admit it to anyone, but it struck a particular chord of dread in him whenever the louvred metal doors slid away before him and he was forced to traverse the droning, beeping, clicking, groaning machinery trapped behind the architectural emptiness.
Pluto had once explained to him the concept of a "liminal space" while organising his daily field research.
-
"Liminality is, how do you say, a state commonly observed by man."
His glittering ruby irises flit back and forth across the tops of several holographed tabs.
"It is, so to speak, existing in a state of limbo."
He dismisses each window to the right or left with confident, swift swipes of his fingertips.
"When one is outside of points A and B. When one's regularity is upset and change is coming, but hasn't yet."
In the corner of Terra's visual feed blinks a purple light, alerting him to the three files just received under the subject "inv_rp21".
"A liminal space is similarly transitional. It is being beneath the bridge that connects your docked train to the station. It is being in the foyer of an familiar's unfamiliar home. The point of unease typically achieved by this will vary for the individual, but its basis is the same."
The sway of his tail and a dark chuckle follow him sauntering out of the office.
"Simply a little walk through to the gallows will unsettle these poor, ugly animals, even if they aren't in the noose. The paranoia is quite pathetic, don't you think?"
"…Quite. Thank you, 08."
-
The idea that he should be so human as to feel the effects of a "liminal space"…quite frankly, it irritated him.
What was the point of becoming an android if not to escape the trappings of the illogical?
If he had a choice, he'd simply warp straight to the laboratory and skip the gallows' walk altogether. The atmosphere of the planet Earth, the planet they'd been stuck on for centuries, he had to keep reminding himself it was far too dense to do any such thing and then attempt recompiling his molecular structure. If he were to try, travelling light speeds here would rip him asunder on an atomic level and he'd die a dangerous, obliterating death.
The thought alone was harrowing and persistent enough to keep him on the ground. He wished he'd never gotten a taste of it during the war against Mega Man, because it was tempting. But he couldn't. If he forgot, and did, wouldn't that be horrific? Every one of his men screaming for cover they'd never get, his carelessness costing them their lives, leaving their legacy a crater on a nowhere planet?
'Stop it.'
The necks of the cameras craned to fix their gazes on him.
A picture, of 40 different eyes turned to him in unison with his face reflected in each glassy surface, burned into the front of his mind.
And wouldn't leave.
Terra's legs stiffened. He shut his eyes.
Hampered by his body and the Earth's device, he had one defense against the odd, humiliating stress of being scrutinised from all angles: talking. It was a habit he'd developed long before his reconstruction at Albert Wily's hands.
In order to distract himself from the baleful thoughts that would constantly, ceaselessly encroach upon his mind, he would quietly, but vocally, talk to himself. He would talk until either the offending issue was gone, or until he'd calmed his anxiety enough to face it without shutting down, or doing something impulsive.
Instrumental to the success of this repression was that he not stop. That he tune out anything else telling him to divert his attention, do what he set out to do, and not stop.
"…♁, you're already pushing the envelope on time," he scolded, in a sing-song tone.
"If you arrive for your hygiene check late, he's going to complain, and then waste even more of your valuable time arguing why he should be 'cut a break, if you're not going to abide by your own set rules and arrive precisely when you mentioned you would, you neat freak."
The predicted conversation annoyed him perfectly. It drove his low heels clacking across the floor, to confront his slacking, good-for-nothing inferior before he had a chance to say exactly that.
"You can see his face now, right, sad and long like it deserves sympathy, probably because he'd been 'waiting oh so patiently, your highness'__I'll bet you feel your temper flare when he says that,"
which it did, taking his annoyance to anger and hurrying him into a power-stride, past a door with a slate sign labelled "MAINTENANCE".
"And of course, opportunist he is, he'd probably have thought he could take a quick nap-- actually, scratch that, there is no such thing as a 'quick nap' for him, once he's down, he's out, and he knows that, yet he never considered that when filing for employ in this embassy, he's got no professional pride, one of these days, he's going to get you all killed."
"Your invisible friend does a terrible job of backbiting, you know."
Terra's greenest shoots curled very suddenly, tightening his posture and releasing a gas into the hall that was the closest thing to a scent he'd detected since departing the byway.
He swivelled on his heel and stomped once to steady his posture, something he'd had to make a habit of doing since losing his hind legs, and usual gait. His company shook a finger at him.
"I do wish he'd be a little quieter."
Saturn was behind him by at least three metres.
Behind him by…what?
Behind him?
Sun strike him dead, the door was enormous. He was right there. How couldn't he have heard it shifting, at least? Was he really so caught up in distracting himself that he'd prioritised his pacing over the destination? Who knows how many times he might have gone in circles around it in that case?
Worse yet, why did that smug, sleepy face have to be the foremost indicator of his mistake? Taunting him with the notion of having seen all that faffing about?
Terra inhaled, and closed the distance between them, to two metres minimum. He even checked his feet to ensure that was correct.
"Move."
The seemingly indestructible smile on Saturn's mannequin-esque visage only grew with the demand.
"Now Terra," he started, pulling his ring off his shoulder. "There's an etiquette to asking things of people. A magic word: you may have heard of it?"
Electrostatic discharged between Terra's roots as he clenched the fist of his left hand, building up energy for the Spark Chaser. He didn't have to turn around to understand the hall cameras had settled on him, in sync with Saturn's hollow, impossibly red optic display.
"Move."
Motionlessly, Saturn's line of sight trailed from his hand to his eyes. Locked on to them. In mustering up the courage to hold him there, and not back down, Terra was able to look through him to the…limitless nothing. Into the abyssal, and unfeeling vacuum behind that warmly coloured shell.
…For just a few seconds, before the marionette made a show of throwing up his hands in mock defeat.
Terra questioned whether or not someone's photoreceptors counted as a "liminal space". His, at least. Certainly, they teetered on the cusp of real and unreal. It didn't help that his every action was such a practised, methodical thing.
It made nothing but sense that he'd devise sanitised, utilitarian floor plans like these, when he thought about it critically.
Saturn spun his ring out of the doorway, toeing it two metres until he could stop behind it and bow, gesturing his hand to the open lab. Always overdoing it with the inane, performative gestures, he should deck him just for that.
"Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't realise you were in that kind of mood!" The plastic grin did not waver. "Go on in! Gosh, what a throwback! I remember when you dropped in just like this, oh, couldn't have been any less than two Earth days ago! Time flies, hm?"
Terra shot him a look as he stepped over the threshold into the very white, and somehow even more ascetic rotunda. Then shot him another to make sure he wouldn't shove him on while his back was turned.
"You certainly are a diligent one, inspector," Saturn continued, unprompted. "I hope this visit yields tangible results. Aethers forbid you find nothing, driving you madder when the data doesn't reflect the nonsense you're convinced of in your own head! …Oh, wait."
Hilarious.
A wry laugh escaped the other as he considered stitching his inferior's mouth closed and beating him into submission.
But, not really. Although, somewhat.
He missed the years where he didn't have the wherewithal to emulate this biting sarcasm he seemed so reliant on to mask his social ineptitude nowadays.
It'd grown tiresome.
On his tiptoes now, Terra was careful not to trip any wires hooked up to heavy duty equipment or touch any of the hand tools littered on the floor with his feet. He avoided crushing a single mircochip, or shattering any stray sheet glass. He squinted at the fluorescent white fixture in the dome ceiling and swore something fell into his eyes. Let alone his grasses.
Sun above, for how tidy and untouched it appeared, it was filthy in here. How could it have gotten this bad in two days time?
"Terra? What's wrong?"
Saturn's voice came in far too loudly behind him. He rushed to occupy himself with plucking and pulling on two gloves from the dispenser near a chemical wash sink.
"Yellow patches notwithstanding," he jested, jested, absorbing every Sun-forsaken microbe from the doorframe as he reclined against it like it was a seat, it wasn't, why did he insist. "You look exhausted! This neverending cycle of fretting and compulsive cleaning to look busy and responsible must be wearing on you!"
A disingenuous look of pity crossed his expression. "Is there anything I can do for you, Your Highness?"
His composure nearly dissolved, right there on the spot. Terra grit his teeth and angled his head just enough to keep Saturn in his peripheral vision.
"You can disappear, how about that? You'd like to help me? Get out."
And, not giving him room to refute, "I'll signal you once I'm done in here, if you haven't managed to trip, get comfortable, and fall asleep on your way to the common room."
"Actually, I never said I was-" "Get out, 06! OUT!"
The 6th planet's greatest shame pretended to flinch, and hit a red button fixed into the doorframe, backing steadily out of his base of operations. "Well, all right! No need to shout, you'll wear your poor old voice hoarse!" The door slowly, very slowly, began to close, and would lock once it did. Terra crossed his fingers it wouldn't give him trouble when it came time to leave for the deep-wash chambers.
Grabbing a clump of steel wool and a bottle of bleach from an open storage closet, he glared at Saturn's waning form through the shuttering egress.
So many installations, so little time…he decided he'd start scrubbing at the surgical table, which by no means should ever see so much residue and metal shavings, but how much could he really expect out of such a lazy slob? This wasn't even his job, but he'd forced his hand into doing it anyway.
He flipped back the belt restraints, out of his way.
If he could hack the idiot open and reprogram him with a sense of accountability, he would, without hesitation.
"And while you're out there," he snidely commented, unable to hold back. "Try rethinking your interior design aesthetics."
From out in the corridor came a satisfyingly vexed huff.
"When we begin reconstructing the Sol, I don't want to see any lobbies plotted by an AI whose net is three cheap home renovation magazines max, 06."
"MINIMALIST! IT'S MINIMALIST, TERRA!" Despite his best efforts to remain in earshot, his voice faded behind the nearly-closed door. "I've seen the future, and it's LESS-IS-MORE, alright?! I'm a futurist! I'm ahead of the curve! I promise you, in another 20 years you'll be…"
Click. Hiss.
The commander's eyes drifted to the console at which Saturn monitored all his various security feeds, and watched him move between them. He watched him haul himself all the way to the lift, feeling much less tense behind the spotlight than under it.
"Slovenly bastard."
He was probably tracking untold amounts of grime and dust behind him. That this blind tryhard had the audacity to call himself "ahead of the curve"…
Terra sighed hard as he scrubbed, in repetitious circles, trying to decompress, and found he couldn't. Just talking to Saturn had sucked all the will to live from his body, like matter through a black hole.
The truth was clear. At some point, he'd have to go browsing the market for a new engineer.
If things continued like this, he was seriously going to hurt him.
More than he already had.
...But, not actually. Not really, he hadn't.
At the end of the day, he was a void imitating life, feigning innocence and pain, priding the future while clinging to the past. He couldn't be asked to take the blame of despair for someone opting to live a lie.
The steel wool broke the glove on his right hand. Hastily, he tossed it and the other in a mesh wastebasket, washed his hands, and popped on a replacement pair.
--END
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didnt have a name for this goin in or anything i just sat down yesterday and typed up some crap cus Terra. idk i'm Interested in him theres so many different interpretations of him you can go with and Im leaning heavy on "a well intentioned but morally questionable Bitch". with OCD. his OCD isn't part and parcel of his Bitchness but it does contribute to a lot of his thought patterns, decision-making, and fixation on germ avoidance.
and then, arbitrarily, things can be too clean and clinical and then we arrive at an uncanny valley stage, which is his mood in this fic.
i wanna believe he an Saturn are like. at odds. working together yea but still at odds bc Long Arduous History. theyre barely tolerating each other and it Will come to a head at some pt. should write abt that too someday.
u h here i guess. //dumps this out in your hand and runs away
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😩
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nosygay · 14 days
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"social media only support short content and that's why all of our attention lifespans are dead"
my YouTube recommendations:
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toastsnaffler · 4 months
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oh wow just saw flatmate messaged saying another friend passed smth on like oh okay. I didn't realise he went too u didn't say. in fact none of u said anything to me so that's great
#he lives hours away thats a lot of travel just for drinks#when she asked me she said it was her + one other person. going out for drinks in evening.#but clearly she took the day off work bc ghosts dont do laundry. so it was a whole day trip. so why tell me it was just drinks#unless she just wanted a good excuse for me not to come. okay 👍#i cant even make myself mad abt it like fair enough man. i get it.#and if last weekend is anything to go off she probably wont ask me at all in the future#well as long as they have fun it doesnt matter i guess. im tired of feeling like im just intruding in everyones lives#and everyone fucking lying like what u say doesnt line up with how u act i can tell its not real im not that fucking stupid#ive dealt with this so many times before average autistic experience im tired of naively believing ppl and then the rug being pulled#sorry for being the way i am and for wanting things and for trying to take up space i give up its not worth it anyway#at least this is giving me smth to feel shit abt instead of just formless malaise. makes it easier to deal with that way#anyway. just need to get my shit enough together to leave the house by 3 so i can pick up this stuff for work#and i can do most of my other chores tmr so thats fine#i hate how much fucking time i waste feeling awful. no wonder other ppl have time to watch n read n create n whatever so much more than me#half of my fucking life is spent in my head trying and failing to emotionally regulate im so so sick of it#i wish i never had to think a single thought again and maybe id be happy#jesus fucking christ. well i need to leave my room soon bc i need to pee im not depressed enough to piss in a bucket just yet#hope i never get to that stage again amen uni was pretty fucking dire#.vent#hate weekends so fucking much what a waste of free time
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