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#one day I hope you can share that pl with anyone too anon once you made it ^^
atsu-i · 1 year
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Uh... Well, I have been thinking about creating a so called "Playlist of my life", not because the songs hold any specific meaning that is attached to any of my experiences but rather more oriented towards the songs I fell in love during my life time. Two of the top 10 of those songs are: Modjo - Lady (Hear me tonight) and YUI - Life. I think the latter isn't that chill but I just can't stop listening to it after all these years. I'm fact, both songs are like 20 years old or something. Do you know them or have listened to them by any chance? :) And, uh... Sorry for over sharing again?
:0
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educatedsimps · 4 months
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Can I pls request a boyfriend hc for Mattsun? 🥺🤲 one where it’s longterm like, highschool to waaaay into adulthood type of longterm.
≪ back to fics masterlist
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mastukawa issei x f!reader
a/n: when i tell you i squealed reading this request ✋😭 THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING ANON! AND YES BAE I’M WRITING THIS just a word of warning tho, i’ve never written for mattsun before so i had to do a little research, hope i didn’t mess up his character 🤧 anyway i hope u like this! and thanku for reading :)
cw: i may or may not have gotten carried away, f!reader, timeskip spoilers, established rls, tooth-rotting fluff
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how you got together:
probably met him in your first year of high school, and got together after becoming really close friends
you made friends with hanamaki first because you were classmates, then one day he invited you to study together with his friends and that's when he introduced you to mattsun
you realised you shared a lot of classes with mattsun and you just clicked once you started talking
of course, you got acquainted with oikawa and iwaizumi as well
you had a group chat with makki and mattsun, and the latter often texted you after school and after practice
you had similar interests and music tastes and stuff (and of course enjoyed teasing oikawa together)
you and mattsun also started studying together (probably tutored each other in some subjects too)
the both of you started catching feelings as you grew closer and by the time you were halfway through your second year, the two of you had FATTEST crushes on each other bUT NEITHER OF YOU DID ANYTHING ABOUT IT AHJKDHSK i swear it pissed your friends off so much
anyway, makki and oikawa made a bet with mattsun in year 2, in which mattsun would have to confess to you if they didn't make it to nationals that year
iwaizumi told them to cut it out (they didn't listen)
oikawa knew mattsun wouldn't want to jeopardise his friendship with you by confessing, so he used that as an incentive for mattsun to train more LOL oikawa's actually evil
but they lost to shiratorizawa anyway so mattsun had to confess to you
he went to your class during lunch the very next day with a small bouquet of flowers and a note
he wanted to just leave it on your table and leave before anyone saw him, but you just HAD to walk in right at that moment
"what's that?" "...it's for makki" "then why is it on my table, issei?" "...because makki likes to sit at your table" "but makki's not even in this class"
anyway he ended up with the girl of his dreams that day and now he's secretly glad seijoh lost that game lol
you graduated together after dating for 1.5 years, and took a really beautiful grad photo together (he had the absolute biggest smile on his face, even makki had never seen him smile that wide before)
there was one photo with his friends in the background cheering as he bashfully gave you a kiss on your cheek (YOU GUYS ARE SO CUTE MY HEART IS ABOUT TO EXPLODE)
you also had a ton of photos photobombed by oikawa and makki in the background - and a few more taken when iwaizumi was dragging them out of the frame by their ears
dates with him:
he brought you out to dinner for your first date
he listened to oikawa's advice to take you to dinner because "girl's like the classics" and since oikawa was the only one in the team who had had a girlfriend before, mattsun decided that maybe he had a point
iwaizumi reminded him that oikawa got dumped his girlfriend but anyway-
it was a decent, slightly fancy restaurant in the city area and yes, he insisted on paying (he's been spoiling you from the very start)
he also got all dressed up for it - and i mean, suit, pants, flowers and everything
he was blushing the whole time
after that, you guys started going on different types of dates, depending on whether you're more of an extrovert or an introvert
dates include going on picnics, going to the arcade, movies, night markets and festivals, aquarium, museum, etc.
def a ton of home dates too - ordering food and doing skincare together or just cuddling
as broke highschool kids, you probably went to less expensive places, except for the occasional event, eg. after major exams, on you birthdays, your anniversary, after winning a game, etc.
lots of cheap after-school lunch dates though
milestones together:
you were each other's firsts, so you both lowkey didn't know what you were doing but you learned together
probably had your first major argument/conflict/disagreement after about half a year of dating? but you learned to resolve it in a healthy way pretty quickly
if you're not a confrontational person, then mattsun was probably the one who initiated the conversation after the argument
he probably cycled to your house in the evening just to apologise to you and talked things out
he can be a little blunt sometimes so resolving conflicts with him are usually very direct
after that, you slowly learned from each other's habits and signs and rarely get into heated arguments anymore because you know how to resolve conflicts peacefully through ✨communication✨
it was a pretty important milestone when you first met each other's families/parents, which was about a few months after dating
your parents knew you guys were friends first but had never met him until you started dating
he's a pretty nonchalant guy but meeting your parents for the first time was probably one of the most nerve-wracking moments in his life (i think it's a universal experience)
they love him tho
if you have any really young siblings or cousins, they'd probably use him as a free climbing activity
he has an older sister and a younger brother and they absolutely ADORE you
like from the moment issei introduced you to them, they were like "ISSEI WE WANT THIS ONE"
moving in together during or after college
you guys were one of the cutest campus couples like your relationship was the PEAK of all college relationships
like EVERYBODY wanted a relationship like yours and mattsun's
the little things:
he looks like his love language is gift-giving, followed by quality time but that's just my opinion
so you can expect lots of little gifts from him
he also always initiates a lot of dates because he wants to spend time with you
walks you home every chance he gets
ALSO FLOWERS
in high school he'd pick flowers from the school garden and give them to you, he'd either visit your classroom during break or give it to you when he sees you in the hallway or even between classes
probably pissed off the school gardener once for picking too many flowers but they became good friends and now mattsun always gets fresh flowers for you
idk why but this man gives "he'd get you flowers every time he passes by a flower shop bc 'why not'" vibes
mattsun would 100% match outfits with you on a date "just for the aesthetic"
mattsun in a black turtle neck, jacket, a thin silver chain, more flowers, and a fancy restaurant for a date
he'd probably make a spotify playlist for you, either of songs that remind him of you or of songs that are special to both of you
he would carry your bag for you when you go out, even if you insist that it's not heavy, doesn't matter how feminine it is, he'd gladly carry it on one side while holding your hand on the other side
you send tiktoks to each other every day (and by that i mean A LOT of tiktoks) and he watches every single one that you send him and he always replies to them. either with an emoji or a short reply, he just wants you to know he enjoys your tiktoks
will send you every "send this to the prettiest girl you know" tiktok he comes across (which is also very often)
takes candid photos of you when you're not paying attention, probably has one as his lockscreen too
post-timeskip hcs:
you're close to the seijoh 4 and hang out with them almost every time they meet up
and since you're mattsun's +1 who's been around them since high school, you're invested in the other guys' love lives too
sometimes you and mattsun try to set them up with people for your own entertainment to help them out a lil
you and mattsun are like a package deal, if you're invited to something, he's coming with and vice versa
you and mattsun would probably ditch an event together once you're tired or sick of it
you probably saved all the dried petals from all the flowers he's given to you over the years and got your wedding guests to throw them as you walked down the aisle together (you saw someone do this on tiktok and when you told him after the ceremony he actually cried)
if you guys own a car, you would probably take turns driving the car every day and drop off / pick up the other from work
if you don't then you'd meet at a bus or train station nearby and head home together every day
the two of you would 100% take naps on the bus or train together with earphones in
since he works in a funeral home, i feel like he'd have tons of flowers at his workplace, so sometimes he'll take a few home for you
either that or he knows the best flower shops in town and he'll often pick up a bouquet on the way home
also tells you stories from his work
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a/n: ok i'm out of brain juice for this one but i hope you liked it! i hope i didn't write him too ooc too 😭
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© educatedsimps 2024. do not repost, copy, translate or plagiarize any work from this blog on tumblr or any other platforms. if you do, the simps will hunt you down. likes and reblogs are appreciated!
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jils-things · 6 months
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ooo tell us abt the proposal jil its 2 am pls read us a little bedtime story u.u 💤
AAAUOOOO 😭😭 how dare you hide under the anon mask sniffles... ill get u... WEEEHGJH PIPIPI you got me so passionate here in writing it ALMOST could be considered a little fic rnnnn 🤧🤧🤧🤧 I'M ANGRY AND EMBARRYYYY AAAUUUWA MWA
so there would be a day - of course where steven just knew - he wanted to be with her, for as long as he can. he wanted to propose to her, but how should he go about that?
he doesnt want to be obvious - because she's pretty good at noticing him when he's trying to do something special for her. hes such a loverboy what can we do smhsmh if he suddenly took her to a restaurant with no context other than just "treating you with nice food because yes" but it was actually her birthday then she KNOWS there's something up and it can ruin the surprise (at least for him. he would be ruined if she knew instantly AHHSJFAJFASJF). so whats the best way to go about this proposal idea? he has to surprise her, somehow...
so at nighttime, at sla.teport, where all the crowds at the marketplace dispersed, nothing but the windy night and the ocean waves crashing on the shoreline. steven waited for jaide by the lighthouse, the farthest from the city, and closest to the ocean. he was minutes early than the agreed time. no gentleman leaves his wife sweetheart hanging, now does he? he had the ring box in his suit pocket. he was nervous, constantly rubbing his finger against the cold metal ring he wore.
well fortunately, he would learn about a nice meteor shower coming up, and it just so happens to be in s.lateport city, the very place where they met. he's seen meteor showers before, but she never did. he always wanted her to see one, and this is the perfect opportunity - the perfect distraction, even. so one day, he'd excitedly tell her that a meteor shower is upon them in a few days, and was hoping if she was available to come along to share the view with him. now, jaide obviously could not turn this offer down because she always wanted to see one based on how much he praised the beauty of it, and she cant turn down a once in a lifetime opportunity, no? it would also break his rock loving heart if she declined...
"if she says yes, one of these rings will be retired soon," he would tell himself... he sure was confident. there was definitely no plan b here.
so of course she would come, maybe a minute or two later, but he was happy to see her regardless. the skies were still pitch black, no sign of glitter yet. best to talk to kill some time.
he would begin to express how time seem to fly so fast since he met her, because everyday was a new opportunity to do something with her. then again, he always thought about her even since they were kids, wondered how she was doing since that faithful encounter. he never knew he'd even begin to fall for her when they just wanted to rekindle that friendship. jaide herself never saw herself to be in a relationship with anyone, she was happy all by herself, but steven struck a cord in her that made her think twice about just being by herself - he was more than just a friend. he was someone she knew understood her well - someone she could probably see spending the rest of her life together with ... but thats enough of sentimentality.
suddenly, a little sparkle in the sky and more followed after. the skies twinkled beautifully, and jaide was amazed. her eyes could not be separated from the view - perfect.
steven not only got her distracted, but boy was she the prettiest thing. he could stare at the skies too, but nothing can compare to the look on her face, so innocent, so charming. he allowed her to watch in silence, until it was over.
"i beg to differ" a challenging statement coming from the man. this made her turn her head to him in confusion - there, her eyes widened.
"i'm glad to have shared this time with you" she says, still looking up. "this is possibly the prettiest thing i'll ever see in awhile, steven." she has no idea, she was too immersed in the sightseeing.
and there he was, one knee down - arm slightly outstretched. a box on his hand - a diamond ring inside. it sparkled wonderfully, full of purity and shine
"steven? you--"
he chuckles again,
he's actually quite prepared for this for awhile now. he bought that ring AGES ago. his father threw every ring design at his direction when possible, he literally asked for jaide's mom's blessings without jaide knowing he was in new ba.rk town and heck, though a little rebellious at the idea, he even got gold's approval - that protective little brother of hers. he had everything, but not the time. but it all ends today,
the times he's been itching about wanting to ask her to be his, and his only. everytime he'd look at her, there's that nice feeling of warmth and happiness deep inside him - because he knows, she's changed him before they even realized it. the moment he recognized her from the crowd, he knew he had to talk to her again and boy is he glad he's done that. and as if she wasnt remarkable back then, she's just as charming as the present - independent, smart, and even considerate for his well being - she never knew he was someone of rich status and always saw him as an equal. it was nothing but a breath of fresh air whenever he talked to her and he only fell harder for her. a lot of people he comes across wanted him for some other reason aside from his actual self and he's been through enough to be distant from those kind of people. but jaide, jaide was different - and that's what made her so charming to him that he wanted to win her attention. but now, he asks with full certainty and will in his voice
"for so long have i chosen to walk as a lone man - concerned for his passion and interests - i've had people to be there for me, but none stuck as long as you, even if time separated us, we still found each other - and our friendship only bloomed harder than ever. it was at that point where i realize that - i want you to partake in the next chapter of my life."
and of course, she said yes ♡
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mamaestapa · 6 months
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this isn’t hate so don’t take it as such but it’s really confusing seeing you have one foot in, one foot out of the fandom and then getting mad when people don’t follow or understand where you’re at
I don’t read everything you post, I’m not on tumblr often but i saw you said you’re not writing for joe rn (completely fine and valid) but you answered an ask the other day about how much of a dream it would be to have him fall in love with you (when anon said you looked like liv) AND hes still your profile pic and username. I understand the username is effort to change but he is still all over your blog and some days it seems like you’re in a good mood to talk about him and the next you’re so done and it’s just really confusing at this point. if you’re done with him, that’s fine, just pls say so bc it’s confusing when you’re like “u never know!” but also “im not in a joe mood rn” but also “I’d love him to fall in love with me and that would be a dream” and then get mad when we send asks like I genuinely just don’t understand if you love or hate him? you’ve kinda given the impression of both and it’s fine either way but pls just be clear bc it seems like we’re pissing you off but you’re not clear on where you stand and idgi cjdjdmd i thought you were done with him but then I saw the liv ask where u said it would be a dream for him to fall in love with u, so I thought ‘ok ur not writing for him, but you still like him and wanna talk ab him’, and he’s ur prof pic and stuff so I was like ok safe assumption, but then it seemed like u got mad when I sent u a tweet so im just confused fjfjffjd
i hope you understand this isn’t hate and i genuinely love your blog. i just think being clear would be helpful and if ur rlly done with him, even just for now, being straight up would be better than saying youd love him to fall in love w u and then basically telling us to shut up ab him the next day bc ur in ur hockey era rn 😭
sending this with love! once again not hate just don’t like being chastised
“this is the only ask i’ll answer regarding this. “
felt like I was being told off by a teacher in school when I just didn’t know bc u said he’s your favourite last week and some other positive things the other day😭
🤍
i don’t really know how to answer this lol. first of all, i’m not mad at anyone. i just get a little annoyed.
i want to start by saying, i don’t hate joe. i hate what the joe community on tumblr has turned into. you can’t post anything anymore without receiving hate or some sort of comment that isnt so nice. it’s frustrating to see so many good blogs and genuinely nice people receive hate because of the things they post.
we’re all on here just trying to have fun and post positive things about our favorites!
i do not expect you to read every single thing i post on here. i don’t expect that out of anyone that reads my stuff or follows me.
yes, joe absolutely is all over my blog. i’m a fan of his, i write for him, he has been my blog for a whole year now. i don’t mind receiving asks about joe, literally at all. when it comes to his personal life and what he’s doing though…it’s different.
i didn’t create my blog to talk about or speculate anything about joes personal life/life outside of football. i made this blog to write about, see pics of, and meet other people who shared a love for him and the sport too. all this community has turned into the last few months has been drama and speculation which is NOT what im here for.
i’ve moved onto hockey because football wasn’t my interest anymore and that’s okay. i didn’t say to shut up about joe, you absolutely can talk about him. i simply just said i’ve moved on.
i get a little frustrated when i get asks about when in writing fics or updating for him because i’ve said multiple times that im taking a step back and taking a break from writing about joe. am i not allowed to be a fan and say i love him without him being the focus of my blog anymore? lol.
i didn’t mean to “chastise” anyone, i just was simply saying i’m not going to answer anymore asks about what the tweet was about because it’s ALL over tumblr right now. many blogs are receiving hate, talking about the subject, etc. and i just don’t want to be apart of that. i did not create my blog to talk about his personal life or have any drama.
i’ve stopped writing about joe because of what the community has become. he has nothing to do with it.
i appreciate you being honest with me on how you feel about my blog and my approach with this! i didn’t mean to come off the way i did when i answered your ask about the tweet, i just didn’t want to contribute to the conversation anymore and make it a bigger deal than it already is.
with that being said, it’s been great on here with yall but i’m stepping away from the “joemunity”. thanks for being so amazing🤍
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coastxlwaters · 2 months
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Hi, I'm anxious at the moment so sorry about being anon.
I wanna ask your opinion on something.
I want to share some DCA aus I have but I realized some of them were Sun x Moon and I'm worried now. I had an aninatic I was super excited to share once I ever got it done but once I realized it was a ship thing I'm questioning to just keep it to myself/post seperate from Tumblr.
I know Sams and Fnaf are seperate but idk. I guess I'm worried kf confusion or assumptions kf "Oh you ship this in fnaf, you probably ship in Sams too"
Sorry, this is probably weird. You can ignore it. Sorry for bothering you. I hope you have a nice day and this doesn't make it weird or anything. I'm sorry.
Anon, (or moot? Idk ur on anon so i cant tell but u said it like u might be-) if its DCA no one should care! I bet ur au ideas and animatic are lovely! If ppl annoy u abt shipping them, block them. most of those are TSAMS fans we do not want to be associated with. Same with DCA.
And dw, this doesnt annoy me in the slightest!
Also i woukd like to say this: It was MENTIONED in TSAMS that it is actually RARE for them to be brothers or family! I swear i really dont want to see people hating on this, ITS LITERALLY JUST A SILLY YOUTUBE SHOW. And same for DCA, ITS A FREAKING GAME. If i see anyone hating on stuff like this, ur getting blocked immediately. Ofcourse, u can have ur opinions but pls state them kindly. I do not mind if u dislike ships, but i do mind if u will actively hate on them. There is a difference from hating and disliking.
(pls tag me in ur animatic once ur done i would love to see it!!!!)
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aritamargarita · 2 years
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*climbs through your window again now that requests are open* Chyna x reader pls 🙏🙏🙏 don't care what happens i just think she's neat ❤
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ANON?? WHAT ARE YOU DOING??? GET OUT???!!!
just kidding. make yourself at home!!! in fact i will make you dinner right now like you’re a saint for requesting this omg. always had the biggest crush on her,,the mention of vanilla is because of me reading chris jericho’s book and him saying she smelled like vanilla!!!!!!!
also cameo from the kat because i love her too. idk if i made this too long or too short😭i hope headcanons are ok if not i will literally write an entire fanfiction i swear i will
THIS ONE IS FOR THE GWORLSSSS. listened to “mary on a cross” while writing.......your beauty never ever scared me!
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CHYNA IS THE most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen. You tell her as much everyday. You’ve said it so much that the words don’t even sound the same anymore.
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—She brushes you off, almost as if she doesn’t believe you. Paid you no mind. There were far more important things to worry about.
For example, the Intercontinental Championship. She won it at No Mercy, but now she’s focused on defending it as if it’s the last thing on Earth. Not to mention she has to share it with likes of Chris Jericho.
But when you had brought roses to congratulate her, she was surprised. No one else had even gone that far, let alone say congratulations, all too bitter that she had even won the championship.
After that, whenever you smelled the familiar scent of vanilla, you knew she was in the room. Somehow, she always smelt like a bakery. She would pass by you or even stand next to you and it was as clear as day.
It was always the little things. You’d offhandedly mention how you liked that shade of blue on SmackDown’s logo and she’d show up the next day with the same shade painted on her nails.
If you just so happened to mention how nice she looked in the color white, she’d show up to Raw in white gear.
During this time, Miss Kitty had been at her worst. You never hated her, you just wish she would shut up sometimes. She was like a gnat that just wouldn’t get out of your face.
“[Name]!” She’d chime, skipping around you. “I know you two have somethin’ going on!” It brought her great joy to hear that someone was involved with Chyna.
Of course, she’d always say “What’s hers, is mine!” So she’d try and snuggle up to you too. Chyna didn’t let her. She didn’t let anyone really get close to you, even the ‘miniature’ version of herself.
Especially Chris Jericho. You’ve had to spend more time with him around the ring thanks to them being co-holders and she didn’t like it just one bit. Who knows if that sleazeball would try and make moves on you?
Sometimes when you accompanied her to the ring, Jericho would come over and talk to you. This of course would irritate Chyna. And just after attacking him, her only excuse is because he was being stupid and she wanted the title for herself.
More like she wanted you all to herself.
Chyna has always been girly. Always. And it doesn’t stop at her own wardrobe. She always is buying you cute clothes, especially ones that can match hers. She’s always appreciated the finer things.
You also learn she really likes the color pink, which definitely clashed with most of her black clothing. It fit her, though. Rarely you’d see her in brighter clothing, but when you did, it was a treat!
She’s more affectionate once you two start to get more comfortable. She enjoys holding your hand instead of kissing you. Her love language is being touched, but she struggles with coming to terms that someone truly wants to even be within her vicinity.
Funnily enough, she had no problems putting her hands on you in the ring. She would toss you around, strike you as hard as she could, and even put you in the most toughest locks.
She’s a good opponent, but it’s easy to distract her. One time, you literally bit her in the ring and she didn’t know what to do for the rest of the match. It gave you an opening for a roll up and you won the match. Honestly, she’d be pissed, but she couldn’t help but to laugh.
After that, you’ve started to do little things like poke her in the side whenever she showed more skin than normal. Sometimes you’d tap her, or sometimes you’d even twirl one of her curls on your finger. You just liked to keep your hands on her and she never complained.
All in all, Chyna’s probably the most ideal person you could be with. While she has her struggles, she still finds a way to show you she cares.
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darling-i-read-it · 1 year
Text
Staring
Eli Ever(Cardale) x fem!reader
Word Count: 2.7k
Warnings: vicious/vengeful spoilers, eli literally killing people (nothing graphic), mentions of elis horrific backstory, angst, pining 
Author’s Note: SHUT UP THIS WAS SO FUN. by the end of the duology I was so in love with eli, i cannot lie. I love victor as much as the next girl but damn i love an awful morally gray (morally black?) man. If anyone has any more request for either of these kings i would gladllyyyy write them <3 in the meantime i hope you enjoy this love!
Request: by anon, YOOOOO i read one of ur victor vale fics, and i am on my hands and knees bEGGING u to write for the villains duology more!! can i rq eli ever x reader where the reader isn't an EO but knew eli and victor in college? and the reader is working with victor against eli bc they don't agree w what eli's doing, and idk eli finds them or smth--sorry if that's too vague!! i am literally BEGGING for eli crumbs and pls include a lot of tension between reader and eli!! ur writing is stellar!!
Song: All I Need by Radiohead 
I don’t own these characters. They belong to author/director/creator
(not my gif)
Eli Cardale sat across from you at the table. You had your legs folded underneath you, tingling as they fell asleep. You had been here a long time. You could tell outside the window that the sun was starting to go down. The stained glass windows of the library were tricky like that, never quite revealing if it was as late as it seemed. Eli had his nose stuck in a book still. You wondered where Victor was, if he was studying somewhere. 
“Are you done?” Eli questioned. Your head snapped back towards him. He was staring at you through the thick rims of his glasses. You smiled, shrugging.
“I’m getting sleepy,” you admitted. Eli nodded once, tucking his papers into his textbook. 
“Is that code for you’re going to go find Victor?” There was a gentle edge to his voice, a slight jealous tinge. You shook your head, rubbing your eyes. 
“Truly sleepy,” you promised. “I’ve been reading about boring things forever Eli. I can only do that for so long. You should share some of your brain power.” He shook his head. 
Eli valued these afternoons with you. They were nice and peaceful. Life outside of these walls tended to be chaotic and with complications he could never quite grasp. In here, nothing had happened to him. It was just you and his books. He could spend forever with you and his books. 
Despite the calmness of the moment, he felt the most emotion here. 
“Plus, Victor is probably off studying.” 
“Alright,” Eli huffed, though there was disbelief in it. You smiled as he put your things back in your book bag. You could probably make some shitty coffee back at the dorms and stay up a little bit longer. Make the day last past schoolwork. Maybe even catch up on some of your own reading endeavors. “Are we still meeting up tomorrow afternoon?”
“Yes sir,” you promised. “Same time, same place?”
“Yes ma’am.” You gave him a nod as you pushed your chair under the table. Eli started to leave. You followed close behind him. “Have you studied for the test in Givens' class tomorrow?”
“Enough.” 
“That doesn’t sound like enough,” he admitted. You shrugged.
“What am I gonna learn in the next 12 hours that is actually gonna help me Eli?” He shook his head. He couldn’t believe you sometimes, though he enjoyed having you around. “You disagree.”
“We have different minds,” he said. The air was refreshing. You walked down the steps of the library, the sun hitting your face. It felt nice after being cooped up for so long. You passed other students, people cramming and holding large cups of caffeine. You weaved through them on the cobblestones back to the dorms. 
“What does that mean?”
“It means we have different ways of learning,” he suggested. You grinned up at him. He looked particularly handsome this evening. You knew he always teased you about liking Victor more than him but it was Eli you had always been in love with. It would always be Eli. His stoicism, his mind, his understanding without you having to say anything. 
“That’s not a bad thing,” you countered. 
“Did I say it was?” 
“You did not.” You lifted your leg dramatically as you started to go separate ways. “I’ll see you tomorrow Eli. Don’t work too hard.”
“You know me,” he called. There was a life in his voice he didn’t recognize when he was with you. You gave him a half wave, an adorable gesture, before walking the other way. 
He watched the back of your head for a moment. Your hair bounced in the sunlight. You looked gorgeous this afternoon, particularly distracting. He watched you go like you were taking a piece of him with you. Eli and Victor had decided not to tell you about their experiments, for your safety. That didn’t mean he didn’t want to. He wanted to hear your thoughts and your comments and your reserves. 
He had put his foot down. Victor was more likely to slip up than he was. 
He still wanted to tell you. 
You turned a corner and he lost you. He dropped his head down, imagining someone else seeing him standing alone, staring at a girl who didn’t once turn back to look at him. 
-
“Tracking him has never been easy,” Mitch grumbled. He was sitting on the hotel bed. The adjoining door was open, allowing Dol to come and go as he pleased. Sydney and you had your own separate room from the boys, at Victor’s insistence. 
“Well it’s never been so fucking hard,” you muttered. You looked out the window. Eli Cardale was out there somewhere, among the people and the cars. You had recently narrowed in on him to this city but been unable to get any closer. He was supposed to be obvious when you were close. “He’s killing people. What do you mean we can’t find him now that he’s so close?” 
You looked over at Victor. He was standing at the computer. He had a look of contempt on his face. You had never seen so little life in Victor. He had always been the stoic type but never as much as Eli. Now, years after college, he was almost dead in the eyes. 
“We need to split up.”
“And what? Scrape the streets to see if we find any rats?” you spat. 
You were different too. 
“He had typical haunts. We need to find an EO and narrow them down, knowing he’ll be around them.” Victor looked at Mitch. He nodded once, getting up to go to the computer. You were never quite sure how they were able to find people so quickly but you also could never understand how they couldn't find Eli. Victor walked over to you. 
“We’ll find him,” he promised. His voice was hard. You looked over at him. 
He looked so old. He looked weathered. He looked like a corpse. He had died. 
Eli and Victor had never let you die. They never would, not even after everything happened. You were a human, just like Mitch, and you were stuck here in this purgatory between people who had been your closest friends. 
After he got out of prison Victor sought you out. He knew that to find Eli he would have to find you first. He half hoped the two of you would be together, frolicking off into the sunset, like the ordeal had never happened. That isn’t what happened. 
“How can you be so sure?”
“Because he’s looking for us too.”
“Do you think he knows that I’m here?”
“I don’t think he ever lost you,” he said lowly. 
“What’s that supposed to mean?” 
“Eli liked having his eye on you. I don’t think he would’ve let you leave his peripheral vision if it wasn’t for me.”
“What a rebel.” 
“Yes ma’am.” Dol walked into the room. He jumped up on Victor’s bed and did a couple circles before lying down with a huff. Sydney was awake. Victor looked back towards the dog, remembering he had a child to care for. “Do you want to go get food while Mitch looks?” He had a gentle tinge in his voice that he saved for you and Sydney. Those in this room were the closest thing he had to family, though he would never admit that. 
“Sure. I need some fresh air anyway.” You cleared your throat and walked back, grabbing some money. “Want anything Mitch? Going to the deli next door.”
“I’m alright. Filled up on protein bars.” You rolled your eyes. 
“Once a jock, always a jock,” you joked. 
“I don’t think-”
“Just go with it Mitch. Vic?” He shook his head. He would rather wallow and die than ask for anything he could get himself. “Syd, I'm getting food!” 
“Can you get me a sandwich?” she called from the other room. 
“What kind?”
“Tuna fish!” 
“Kay!” You opened the door and shut it behind you. The hotel was large but it was cheap. You were okay with the sketchy neighbors as long as no one asked questions. No one got into the elevator with you on your floor and you pushed the down button. You should’ve invited Sydney to come with you. She could use the fresh air too. Dol probably needed to go to the bathroom. 
You thought about how you weren’t that far. You could go back up and grab them, that way you had some company and extra hands for the two sandwiches. Maybe they had dog treats for Dol. You always loved places that thought of that because of how often Dol was around. 
The elevator opened on the second floor. You stepped aside, keeping your head down so you didn’t have to make eye contact. The man walked in and pushed the first floor. The elevator started to move again. 
He pushed the emergency stop button, causing the elevator to come to a harsh stop. You stumbled forward, grabbing the railing beside you. 
“Hey,” you said, annoyed. You glanced up at the floors that were highlighted at 2 still. You finally looked up at him. He was wearing a large black coat with a collar that covered the side of his face. “What the fuck?” you asked, louder this time. He tilted his head towards you so you could see his eye through the thick rimmed glasses.
Your mouth clamped shut. 
“Eli?” When he turned around it was like no time had passed. His face looked exactly the same, exactly the man you sat across from at the library. His eyes were the only thing different, a little less life in them. He and Victor were more alike than either cared to admit. 
The elevator felt too small. You were confined in a small space with someone you had carded as the villain of this story. 
But it was Eli. 
“I heard you were looking for me,” he said, quietly. His voice didn’t seem threatening. There was nothing there that felt wrong. 
“Yeah,” you breathed. “You’re killing people.” 
“They’re not people.” You narrowed your eyes at him. There was a difference. This was the Eli you had never seen, only heard about from Victor. “You…you’re people.” You looked up at him through your hair at him. Your eyes were big, doe eyed, he would say. 
“You’re people too.” He shook his head. There was a sly smile on his face. He had orchestrated his moment, he had thought about the second you would leave and that it would be just you. He needed to see you before he saw anyone else. He stayed in this town to see you. 
He was obsessed with Victor. 
But if he knew love, it was you. 
“I’m a God.” 
“Then what is Victor? What’s Serena?” You could tell you hit a hard note with Serena.
“Serena’s no longer an issue.” 
“She was an issue?” You watched each other for a moment. It was nice to be there with him, even if it hurt to know how different you were. 
“She was an issue.”
“Then what is Victor?”
“Victor’s a defect.” 
“What happened to you?” you asked him, borderline pleaded. You took a step forward and grabbed his hand. He looked down at it like it was a foreign object. He didn’t retreat. 
You didn’t do it to manipulate him. You did it because you had to, because he was right there, before you had to touch him. “What did they do to you Eli?” 
There was no way you could’ve known what they did to him but the question hit him where it would've hurt. It was a touchy subject. He had the sudden urge to hug you, to wrap his arms around you and engulf you in his embrace. To kiss you, to do what he never had the time to do when you were in college. He thought of Victor. He wondered if Victor was with you now, if his worst fear had finally come to fruition. 
“Eli,” you whispered. His eyes had glossed over, lost in thought. He came back, staring at you, studying your face.
“They cut me open. They took parts of me out. They couldn’t kill me.” His voice had no emotion, like he was talking about the weather. 
“I’m sorry.” You knew you should be using this time to convince him to change his ways. You didn’t have him for long. You should’ve been telling him that killing was never the answer and that no matter what happened to him, he should never be taking it out on others. 
But you couldn’t bring yourself to do that. 
Without warning, you wrapped your arms around him. 
His natural reaction was to tense up. He assumed you were hugging him to manipulate him, to get to the buttons, to try and hurt him. Moments passed and you stayed there, head pressed against his chest. You made no ill efforts. 
He wrapped his arms around you. He put his chin on your head. He closed his eyes. 
Why couldn’t it have been like this forever? 
Melancholy filled up the small space. It could never last like this. You had to go back to Victor and you both knew you would tell him that Eli had been here. There is nothing more special than a short lasting mutual agreement to set things aside to have some closure. 
You let him go. Your hands lingered on him as long as you could. 
“You have to go?” he questioned. The tinge of emotion was back in his voice. 
“They’ll come looking for me,” you said quietly. The act of going back assured him some time to leave. You were trying to help him, even now, even after everything. 
He nodded once. He pushed the elevator button to start moving again. It moved down slowly but not slow enough. You both faced the door. You linked your pinky with his, refusing to look at him. 
When the door opened you let out a deep breath. He let you go. You missed his touch already. He walked out the elevator doors. 
Without thinking you reached forward, stopping the doors from shutting. 
“Eli!” He turned back around. His cold face was back, haunting you with the differences in time. You swallowed. “It was always you.” 
His face softened.
The door shut. You watched him until they shut as he turned away from you. The elevator brought you back up to your floor. Like a zombie you walked down the hallway. You had forgotten your keycard and knocked on the door. 
Mitch opened the door. 
“Where’s the sandwiches?” 
Behind him Victor stood, watching your face. He read your numb expression and raised his chin, hardening his face. 
“Eli.”
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mushroomwriter · 7 months
Note
Hermanos anon here - WHY WOULD YOU PUT THAT GIFSET ON MY DASH AAAAAAAH!!!!! i came out here to have a good time and honestly i feel so attacked rn
Anyway, so happy for you that the exam is over and you passed <3 I actually have exams coming up myself lol so I completely understand... also have you heard? Berlin was renewed for s2! Really really hoping Alvaro returns and we get Sergio and hermanos rights in the next season 🤞 (and to fill the need for hermanos content!!) Also pls don't feel like you have to make a set again soon, happy to wait until you get the inspiration, and ofc it's always a good idea to rewatch their scenes, instant serotonin boost - just skip that minor scene that shall not be named at the end of the Mint Heist 😭
Haha I'm sorryyyy! It's something I realised long back but I never had the chance to inflict the angst on anyone else lmao. you added the cherry on top with how you worded it "literally a little brother begging his big brother not to leave him, and knowing on some level that he'll never be able to make him change his mind" 🥺 in some way he would've known right at the moment nairobi and helsinki emerged alone so seeing him going from denial to desperation. hurts
(pt 2) YES, brotherssss!!! Oh, the fact that Andrés is so selfish and narcissistic otherwise just makes the hermanos bond even more special to me?? it hits different than if they'd just been relatively normal/good characters, idk. And yes that's such older brother behaviour of him!! I will tell you some happier observations of mine this time. One of my favourite "older bro" things Andrés does in the series, when he and Sergio sit down to drink together, he ALWAYS pours wine for Sergio first. In the bella ciao scene, his wedding scene in s4, even s3 he literally wakes up Sergio to come have breakfast with them, which means he didn't even allow either Martin or Tatiana to start without his hermanito lol. It's a very sweet minor detail that melts my heart. I can totally imagine them in the Toledo house, pretending they don't know each other but then andrés does little things like these, serving Sergio first or preparing coffee for his brother just the way he likes it before making his own cup :') OH, the feels. Yes, I agree, I definitely think the Bella Ciao lyrics are foreshadowing, and that is exactly what happened in the end. (I have been struck by that thought too, more than once 🥲 it's heartbreaking isn't it? especially when you consider that oslo/moscow had their loved ones with them when they died + a funeral. nairobi had a funeral too. tokio had rio with her before she died. but andrés had none of that, sergio was miles away and then ofc they had to escape leaving him behind... don't think about the guantanamera scene lyrics in this context too. Poor Sergio :( (pt 3) Btw sorry for how long this got!! Please feel free to put everything under a cut if you want 😅 I'm just out here rambling like there's no tmrw. Back to the happier note (omg we really just keep switching between angst and joy) I love that idea!! Yeah, I can definitely see them having that as an inside joke, something that only they share from their childhood memories, it's very sweet! Sergio "I don't dance" Marquina WILL dance if his big bro requires, and it makes me a puddle everytime. Somehow he has the most stiff yet adorable dance moves ever, I loved those moments we got. Andrés mirroring Sergio's moves in the guantanamera scene never fails to bring a smile to my face. Unironically, I used to watch that scene so many times during the pandemic days. I was not doing too well but those few seconds seeing them smile and laugh and dance despite everything used to give me such comfort :D I was glad to see your reply (and once again, completely understand, hope you're taking care of yourself <3) Thank you for putting up (and being so kind) about my rambles, glad you like them! And ofc, please feel free to tell me to shut up if I get too annoying 😭 As always, such a JOY sharing the enthusiasm for these heist bros with you and i hope you have a great week!
AT LEAST WE CAN SUFFER TOGETHER!!! And talk about Sergio, who usually considers every single possible outcome, Never considering his brother could die... whew!
Thank you so much! The best of luck on your exams!! (If you've already taken them, I hope they went well!) I saw that, yeah... and speaking of the spin-off I watched some more of it, I need to watch the fifth episode next... anyway, they better use that new season to give us some new hermanos content or ELSE 🔪🔪 like, just Andrés mentioning Sergio was enough to reawaken my heist brothers obsession, an actual new scene with the two of them would be so Powerful (also I miss Sergio sooo) Thank you, I'd like to gif them again soon but right now the inspiration isn't really on my side, UGH. But I really hope watching and rewatching their scenes (and looking for possible quotes) can help! Honestly since I love pain I will probably watch the Scene That Shall Not Be Named as well but I promise I'll proceed with caution...
Well, I can't blame you, angst is made to be shared! Poor Sergio, he really is in denial at the beginning, huh, insisting Andrés should get into the tunnel... and that's another thing that gets me, because truly there was no time, waiting for Andrés and not blowing up the tunnel basically meant getting captured, and yet Sergio who's usually so cautious and always aware of every risk just refuses to see it. Andrés must get into the tunnel and to safety! And then he gets more and more desperate when it really becomes apparent that it isn't going to happen :(
Oh, I definitely agree! Part of the appeal of big brother Andrés and of their bond imo is the contrast between their usual demeanor and how they behave around each other. When they're together they're a big brother and a little brother, you know 🥺🥺 OOOH thanks for sharing! I don't know if I ever noticed that (if I did I forgot) it really is sweet! I'm smiling a bit at the thought of Andrés not allowing Martín and Tatiana to have breakfast because the most precious hermanito in the world is not there yet! I love that thought! I enjoy picturing how it was for them in Toledo, having to pretend they didn't know each other, and the image of Andrés finding all the sneaky ways to take care of his hermanito makes me melt <3
What can I say, Bella Ciao, Guantanamera, they truly looked at the lyrics and went "ooooh 😈" That completely breaks my heart, like it makes Sergio's grief even WORSE.
Please never apologize about how long your message gets, as far as I'm concerned it only means I have more stuff to enjoy (also thank you for reminding me I can put this under a cut, I probably should lol) It's kind of amusing how we can switch between oh no Andrés was killed and Sergio was completely helpless and awww nice little childhood memories but hey it's great how they give us tragic and happy thoughts both! I absolutely agree about Sergio having the most stiff yet adorable dance moves ever, at some point he's basically like "ok, since I'm doing this with my big brother I'm... actually enjoying it, but this doesn't take all my awkwardness away" and it's so CUTE, Alvaro plays it so well! And Andrés mirroring his moves makes me smile so much!! It truly is a comfort scene and I'm glad it helped you through those times (man, it was surreal).
Thanks so much for your patience! And nooo don't worry, I LOVE your rambles!! It really is a real joy to talk with you about these brothers!
Thank you so much, I hope you have a great week too! (And if you're still studying for your exams, well, I wish you a productive study and hope it doesn't stress you out too much!)
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kpophubb · 2 years
Note
I'm sorry, but I disagree with you about one part: even if there were a girl living with enha boys in their dorm (well, in another world), it shouldn't have any jealousy, in MY opinion. We are their fans, they don't belong to us, and they own us nothing, and even less their private life.
And what jealousy? Once again, we are their fans, I think we supposed to love them as the fans we are, not as if they were our lovers, we don't even know them personally!
I follow your blog, and I know you full of respect and benevolence, so I don't mean that to personally attack you, I just think there are too much people who normalize fans jealousy towards the idols, and I don't think it's healthy, because we finally not that intimate with them to have this kind of feelings...
Yes anonie I know what you’re saying that’s why I said “( a little justified ¿ )” and ended with a question mark for you all to judge how you take it.
when I said a little jealous I didn’t mean it in the sense that they have the right to hate on any girl living with enhypen or any girl enhypen has a romantic interest in. I meant in a sense that when you love someone, you feel jealous in a sad way when you see them be with someone else, as in the heart breaking sense. But I never mentioned that due to that jealousy, you CAN belittle the girl or be rude or start a Twitter war cause that isn’t and WILL NEVER be a right or good thing to do. What I meant is feeling normal human pain and jealousy, being attached and feeling sad for never being able to get them anon. At the end of that para you will see I added “but this is very childish..” meaning the WHOLE jealousy thing about enhypen is very childish and delusional at the end, including even the part when I said about an irl girl.
exactly like you said, enhypen are NORMAL humans at the end of the day who do not belong to their fans and their private lives are NONE OF OUR BUSINESS. They can talk like they want to, fall in love, hang out with girls and even date and get married and as fans we’re supposed to love them and support them for their actions and wish them well. 🤍 we DONOT know them personally and we SHOULDN’T force our way to know them bc how much they decide to share with us is THEIR opinion and we should be respectful about it no matter what.
If you follow my blog and know me enough, thank you for that and I’m guessing you know me enough to know that I DO NOT ENCOURAGE fan obsession OR VIOLATING THE PRIVACY OF ANY ENHYPEN MEMBERS. I’ve talked to many fans and I saw how this whole sooha out thing is a joke for them, they were just making memes but they weren’t taking it personally or feeling jealous or obsessed to the limit of hating on her FOR REAL. But like I said, there are and will always be minority who take matters too far and you can clearly see how I feel about them bc I mentioned them as “toxic” and “very immature.” in my previous ask! you also know from my rules section I even preach that fanfictions I write are TOTALLY delusional too and no one should take em seriously JUST TO KEEP OUT possessive and delusional fan behaviours who claim to own enhypen or any idols I Stan or write about.
and noo anon pls don’t think that I’ll ever consider this being “attacked” 😭 cause obviously I can’t be right at all times and sometimes If I make mistakes, I appreciate being called out so I can correct myself and apologise if I’m wrong or hurt anyone’s feelings so I really appreciate you for caring enough and dropping by with your generous opinion. :)
in this ocassion, I hope I’m clear what I meant ! Bc what you said is my opinion as well but maybe the choice of words couldn’t convey that to you in my previous ask!
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junosmindpalace · 2 years
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Can you do dr stone angst?? preferrably senku x reader and the reader experiencing one-sided/unrequited love 🏃🏃 pls no happy ending i need to suffer 🏃🏃🏃 [though if you do know how to write a hanahaki au, pls do that instead] 🏃🏃🏃
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"What a silly way to die. Death by flowers,” is what you thought to yourself when you first heard of the illness. “there’s no way such a thing could exist."
~ Hi anon! Thank you so much for your request! Im not very familiar with the hanahaki trope but i wanted to give it a shot - i hope it’s okay! Hopefully none of the characters are too ooc </3
P.s., yellow tulips represent one-sided love in japanese :) 
warnings: death, vomiting (flowers), talk of sickness, blood, some swearing. there are no manga spoilers :)
words: over 4k holy this is long
Constructive feedback is always welcome! I’m always looking to improve!
Requests are open! (check my pinned post!)
The Hanahaki disease was vaguely mentioned in one of Ishigami Village’s 100 tales. A woman, in love with a man who didn’t love her back, had suffocated on yellow tulips that she could not stop throwing up. Nobody knew much else about the mysterious illness- no origins were stated, no cure, and there was no record of anyone in the village ever experiencing such an ailment. Maybe it was a metaphor of some kind? 
‘What a silly way to die. Death by flowers,” is what you thought to yourself when you first heard of the illness. “there’s no way such a thing could exist.
But if Chrome has his sorcery, then maybe it wasn’t so improbable. Who knows how much Ishigami Village has yet to discover? Besides, the 100 tales are the reason we know so much already."
When Ruri first fell ill, some speculated she had the mysterious disease. Since they were young, people had always known that Chrome and Ruri shared a strong bond- perhaps Ruri’s feelings were strong enough to make her sick. As time went on however, Ruri never once coughed up flowers or flower petals, so the idea was eliminated. 
But Ruri was still ill, and nobody knew how to cure her for good. No one was certain that the hot spring water Kohaku brought for baths had healing properties, and nobody even knew what it was that was ailing her. 
That was until one day, Kohaku told you about a stranger she had brought to the village with the hot spring water for her older sister. Her ponytail was tied differently, and she was late to retrieve the hot spring water, which was very unlike her. Just who exactly was this stranger, and what were their intentions? If Kohaku trusts them enough to bring them back to the village, however, you had reasoned with yourself, maybe they weren’t all that dangerous. 
The stranger was a boy your age who introduced himself as Senku, and you had eyed him with a raised brow. Chrome stood not too far behind him, running his mouth about some minerals he had in his shed, but not in the arrogant way he usually did. It was a surprise to see how outgoing your friend was with a foreigner. Chrome and Kohaku explained to you that Senku was a sorcerer- sorry, scientist- able to cure Ruri of her sickness, and upon hearing this, you were excited but reluctant to trust him. 
You wanted to be cold at first. Unattached, uneasy to sway, but god did Senku make it difficult. Even when he was an asshole, you couldn’t help but hook on to his every word, enthralled with everything he had to say and offer. You’d observe him in the midst of an experiment with curiosity and stare in amazement over the incredible results he was able to produce. It seemed supernatural to you.
It didn’t take long for you to become a citizen of the Kingdom of Science, aiding your friends in creating the panacea that would help Ruri beat her sickness. After obtaining magnets with iron and gaining some help from the villagers and outsider, Gen Asagiri, it was time for the final test, with Kinro and Ginro helping to generate the electricity you worked so hard to create. You were on the roof of the shed with Senku and Chrome, waiting in anticipation.
“Y/N, does the night scare you?” Senku asked you suddenly as he concentrated his eyes on the bamboo fiber in front of him with a small frown.
“Huh? Well…sure. Everything gets all dark.” You replied, studying his face. “Why do you ask?”
“Back in my day, there was no darkness. With old man Edison’s incandescent light bulb, humanity beat back the night, conquering all twenty four hours of the day. Through the power of science, mankind defeated the darkness, and now we’re gonna do it again.” Your eyes trailed down to watch Senku bring the wires closer to the ends of the fiber. “For the first time in 3700 years, the flame of science will burn.”
The ends met, and a brilliant white light brightly illuminated your faces. You stared in awe of the artificial light, amazed by how Senku was able to make such a thing happen. You realized how loud your heart was pounding, partly because of the incredible power of science and the excitement you felt over this invention and the progress you were making with the Kingdom of Science, but mostly because of the slow smile that spread across Senku’s face, a determined glint in his eye dancing in the warm light. His smile widened when the light fizzed out and he met your eyes, and the world around you seemed to grow quiet.
Multiple windows of opportunity opened as you continued to gather materials and gain allies. It was only after Senku won the grand bout that your feelings began nagging at you.
Sitting around a fire with your friends at Senku’s celebration party, you tuned out the conversation and let your mind drift to the scientist. 
You felt a strong sense of pride knowing Senku and how far he’s come in such a short amount of time, starting off as merely a stranger you and many others were weary of to becoming a leader. Your heart raced every time you watched him fall again in love with his passion, and you found yourself wanting to be near him always; to indulge in what he does, to know of every crazy concept he lived out 3700 years ago. And then you realized what was happening and started thinking very fast. 
Without realizing it, you had slowly been falling in love with Senku. With his mind, his passion and persistence, his wit and cunningness. With him. And with every new hurdle you cleared with the Kingdom of Science, with every thrilling experiment and development, you fell further. 
But you knew how Senku was. Romance didn’t interest him in the slightest- in fact, he was actually disgusted by the idea of being romantically involved with someone. So how the hell were you to go about this? 
He was never going to return your feelings, and you had no idea if your own feelings would fade. You would never be involved with Senku in the way that you wanted to be and were horrified at the idea of him finding out about your feelings and being repulsed by you, terrified of losing the friendship you had with him. Right in the midst of your panic, you felt your chest tighten and you started coughing uncontrollably, covering your mouth with your hand. You and the others were taken aback, and you did everything you could to seize your fit.
“Y/N! Are you okay?!” Kohaku cried out and put a hand on your shoulder, while the others around you stared in concern. 
“I’m…fine…” you coughed out, taking sharp inhales and moving your hands away from your face, balling them into fists. “Something just got caught…in my throat…”
“You sure you're okay?”
“Yup…! No worries!” You straightened up and gave your friend a tight-lipped smile as she reluctantly brought her hand away from you. I need to pull myself together. Senku is outrageously observant. You were grateful that he hadn’t yet joined the party and noticed the yellow flower petal you tucked away into your pocket. 
After Ruri was healed and Senku became chief, the Kingdom of Science’s top priority was defeating the Tsukasa Empire, and there was no time to waste. 
Only ten minutes after your incident, Senku had returned to the village, and Gen revealed that Tsukasa was planning to strike. Everything moved quickly from there.
 After Hyoga and Homura’s attack on the village, the citizens were working to rebuild what was lost as well as create an invention that would give the Kingdom of Science the upper hand against the Tsukasa Empire. Senku revealed that the next painstaking project the Kingdom of Science would undergo would be to create something called a cellphone, a device that allowed one to communicate with others over long distances. You and everyone else could hardly wrap your minds around such a thing (including the modern-timer, Gen, but for different reasons). This is the kind of technology Senku’s people possessed? Was such a thing really possible?
And Senku smiled his signature smile with that determined glint in his eye, and you were reminded that this was Senku we were talking about. With his brilliance and resilience and the help of the villagers, he could absolutely pull something like that off. Your heart skipped a beat as his eyes met yours, and he nodded in sincerity upon seeing the skeptic look on your face. A cell phone, huh?
During the project, your condition didn’t get any better. You had started developing frequent pains in your chest and you couldn’t stop coughing up flower petals. It started with one or two once or twice a day, and over time increased to four or five petals up to three times a day. Luckily, you were able to sense the petals rise painfully up your throat, and it gave you enough time to make a hurried excuse to get away from the others before being thrown into a coughing fit. 
Even with the pain, there was no chance in hell you were going to tell anyone about the disease. It was your fault for being so emotional, especially during such a busy period. Nobody had the time to look out for you and worry, you could make it through this on your own.
But you found that the heartache you felt over Senku only grew with time. Unfortunately, your feelings didn’t fade in the slightest, but only grew stronger and stronger. I mean how could they not? Watching him sprawled over blueprints with a slight pout, listening to him ramble about the science behind this and that- it was all so endearing. You wanted desperately to tell him how you felt and to have your feelings reciprocated, but that wasn’t an option. You could never be intimate in the way you wanted to be with Senku. 
You were painfully reminded of this on days where Senku was a bit more reserved than usual. When he would retreat into the observatory or the lab for hours, or when he seemed particularly serious about the mission, avoiding  jokes and keeping conversation outside of the cell phone to a minimum. You felt like you were straying away from him, and on these days, your condition worsened and was became increasingly more difficult to hide.
Soft touches you initiated had him feigning ignorance, moving away from you and continuing his work. Questions you asked about himself were quickly shut down and maneuvered to more science talk, and you'd retreat from him after failing to be further let into his heart throwing up more and more pretty yellow petals. 
-
After months of hard work, the cell phones (yes, phone(s). Can you believe Senku didn’t tell anyone that TWO were needed?) were complete. A plan was formed to send Gen, Chrome and Magma to hand off one of the phones to Taiju and Yuzuriha, Senku’s modern day friends who were spies within the Tsukasa Empire, and get them to convince other members to join the Kingdom of Science by telling an elaborate lie.
It was the evening prior to Gen, Chrome and Magma’s departure. Everyone was asleep except for you, who sat under a tree staring at the stars, coughing up more petals here and there. The hanahaki disease didn’t make it easy to sleep and on a good night, you’d only wake up once. You collected every flower petal you threw up and kept them all in small, secret pouches you had sewn into your clothing. You were miserable. Nothing you tried was helping cure this illness that, only a year ago, you were certain was fictional. You knew nothing about the sickness either, working with barely any information on how to rid yourself of this wretched sickness. 
The only cure you could think of was the most straightforward one- your romantic feelings needed to be returned. The illness seemed to be connected to one-sided love, so surely if Senku returned your feelings, you would be cured, right? 
But that was never going to happen. Senku hadn’t once expressed any romantic interest in you or anyone else. And if you were to tell him that the only way you could avoid death was by having your feelings returned, that’d put a massive weight on him. You couldn’t do that. You couldn’t let Senku feel like he had killed you. 
You coughed again, this time a little more violently, and covered your mouth. God, you hated this.
“You sure do have quite the asty-nay cough there.” A voice sang and cut through the still air.
You quickly put your hands down and turned your head toward the owner. Only a distance away was the mentalist, a small smile dancing on his face as he approached you and took a seat at the foot of the tree beside you.
“It’s quite chilly. Wish spring would come already.”
“What are you doing out here?”
Gen chuckled and craned his neck to look at you. “Couldn’t sleep and decided to come out to get some fresh air. I have quite the role in this scheme, it’s stressful, you know?” 
You rolled your eyes at his whining, continuing to gaze up at the stars.
“It must also be stressful covering up that dreadful hanahaki disease.” 
Your eyes widened and you quickly whipped your head to look at him, but his gaze had left your face, now staring off into the same sky. Shit, I’m figured out. Do I play dumb?
“No point in trying to hide it from me, dear Y/N. I’ve been observing you. Your symptoms are all too familiar.” Gen sang again. Damn. It’s like he read my mind. And in a way he did. He is a mentalist after all. But how would he know of the hanahaki disease? It must’ve existed in his time. 
“Yes, us modern-timers also dealt with hanahaki. Lots of lives were lost over it. It’s quite poetic, honestly. Death by flowers.” Gen commented in an airy tone. “The more pressing question is, how do you know of it? You didn’t recognize pneumonia but know of this?”
“It was briefly mentioned in one of the 100 tales. Nobody in the village had ever borne the sickness, so I assumed it wasn’t real. Well, that was until…”
The light-heartedness of the conversation quickly faded away. Gen’s face was now hard, mouth formed into a frown, and you sighed. 
“Of course you would’ve been the first to get suspicious.” 
“You mean dear Senku hasn’t figured you out yet? That’s surprising, but you know better than anyone that our Senku is no idiot. He’ll find out soon enough. And what do you plan to do when he confronts you?”
“He won’t. I’ll cover it up so he has no need to get suspicious and investigate me.” 
Gen shrugged his shoulders and an airy smile formed on his face yet again. “I’m sure you already figured out that to cure the hanahaki disease, your beloved needs to return your feelings. But this is Senku we’re talking about, so that seems highly unlikely.”
He even knew that Senku was the person you fell for. How obvious were you? Then again, Gen is a mentalist.
“There is…another way, but it’s impossible in this stone world. You could get surgery to remove the flowers from your lungs, but that’d mean losing the feelings you have for Senku. Even if you were willing to give that up, nobody could help with the operation, certainly not me.”
“So that’s it? I’m out of options?”
Gen’s smile was sour now, and he seemed to be reflecting on something, but his train of thought was interrupted when you started coughing again, not being quick enough to cover your mouth and doubling over to throw up more yellow tulip flower petals onto the grass. Gen stared in horror. You stared in horror.
“I don’t want you to worry about me, Gen. I’ll…I’ll figure something out. I refuse to die. I can’t die. I just can’t leave my friends with that grief and guilt. Plus, they’re busy preparing for the battle against the Tsukasa Empire. I can’t distract them from our goal. I feel horrible putting this on you but please don’t tell anyone.” 
Gen stared at you, very obviously having some internal conflict in his head. Eventually he sighed again and his shoulders sagged. “Don’t die, dear Y/N, or else I’ll feel partly responsible.”
-
Nothing was working.
You were convinced you had tried every healing method you could possibly think of. In the summer, you would take hot spring baths. In the winter, you wore layers. You forced yourself to eat and drink plenty (even though the disease gave you a lack of appetite), you trained on the daily (despite being tired), and you kept yourself busy. The coughing would seize for a little while though, and you found that better than being hunched over 24/7. 
It had become increasingly more difficult to randomly leave and throw up flower petals though. Someone else will soon figure it out, but you couldn’t predict if that would be before or after the disease had claimed your life. 
Gen helped cover for you and you appreciated it beyond belief, but soon enough, it was time for him to take on his task of delivering the cellphone to Taiju and Yuzuriha. 
“Don’t start throwing up flowers while I’m gone, dear Y/N.” You also appreciated his lightheartedness throughout the whole thing. It was a bit easier to manage with the mentalist being able to cheer you up just a slight bit.
You were thankful that you and the others had Homura to focus on instead of just sitting and waiting around for the phone to be delivered the entire time, but you were also getting increasingly weaker. You definitely weren’t a prominent fighter however, so nobody was really looking to you for much assistance in the strength department. In lots of ways, things could've been worse. 
Senku could’ve found out a lot faster, for example. But he didn’t, and you’ve been able to remain by his side. 
In all honesty, you were scared when you first found out you had Hanahaki disease. When you coughed up that first flower petal, a million thoughts rushed into your head and you felt faint, both possibly from your coughing fit and your stress. 
You were the only one to have ever endured the Hanahaki disease. Nobody else had ever experienced it, and you didn’t even believe it was real! So when you continued throwing up petals, you were sent spiralling. You were overthinking everything you knew, and while it may have been dramatic, you felt lost and scared. It made you think about your relationship with Senku as well. You feel guilty for accidentally putting this weight on him without his knowledge, for putting this weight on the entirety of Ishigami Village. 
The sickness seemed to subside while working alongside Senku and Gen in convincing members of the Tsukasa Empire to join over to the Kingdom of Science, at least for a little while. You were close with Senku, and you didn’t need to grieve over anything for a little while. You could just focus on the present. You could simply be content with the little nods of affirmation he'd give you accompanied with a small smile.
If this was how you were to meet your end, you’ll be happy just to have known this incredible man.
The rest seemed like a blur after getting Ukyo to join Senku. The Kingdom of Science was starting to prepare its infiltration of the miracle cave after Chrome had returned safe from his capture, and the battle was a haze. There were many close calls, many times you thought you wouldn’t be able to uphold the agreement that no blood would be shed. You were scared you were going to lose the people you love. 
But in the end, you reigned victorious. Tsukasa had teamed with Senku to take down Hyoga, and the rest of you had worked to capture Homura. As you were all making your way back to your base, you stopped to stare at the sun approaching the horizon.
“It’s hard to believe but finally...it’s over.”
A laugh you were all too familiar with. You turned around to see Senku climbing up to join you at your side. “Are you making a joke or what? That’s backwards. Right now, we’re finally getting started. We got all these people to work together with us, to build a real kingdom of science.”
You looked over at him in all his glory as the rising sun basked you both in its glow. Another chapter was beginning, another with Senku in it, another promised to be just as exciting and eventful as the last. Your heart soared. 
-
Senku is upset. Obviously he’s upset, he has to kill his dying friend. You had seen the more colder and distant parts of Senku before, but you had never imagined him being so emotional, so delicate. Your heart had wings just a while ago, and now it was as if you had flown too close to the sun, getting your hopes up that everything would work itself out. 
It was around this time that everyone was coming together that you were entering the final stages of your sickness. Flowers were blooming in your lungs, and it was now permanently difficult to breathe. It became near impossible to disguise your wheeze and sharp inhales, not being able to explain to the people who love and care for you that you were slowly dying.
You knew you didn’t have much time left, and you were getting panicked. You didn’t have any time to think of other possible cures, and you didn’t have the strength to pursue any projects. Were you seriously doomed?
“Maybe not, dear Y/N.” Gen. What did he mean by that? “I just so happened to find some leftover panacea while clearing out the lab,” and at that, your eyes widened as Gen held up a leaf with the drug. Of course. The cure all sulfa drug. How did you not think of this sooner?
“The thing is, I have no idea if this’ll work. I’ve never heard of a drug being able to cure hanahaki. Hell, it may even kill you immediately! But, if it’s meant to be a cure-all drug, why not give it a try?” 
There was no time to waste. Gen immediately gave you the medicine to take, and you two waited anxiously to see what happened. A minute passed. Two. Five. Okay, so you weren’t dead, that was a good sign. 
Hours passed, and you didnt cough up a single flower or petal. By the end of the day, you had nothing to stuff your pockets with. You had never hugged anyone harder in your life.
By morning the next day however, Gen found you in your tent limp and unmoving. His eyes widened at the scene in front of him and tears formed, rushing off to call for help and being forced to tell everyone about your condition. Tulips. Yellow tulips drenched in blood, some sticking to your face and arm, some on the ground.
The drug had gotten rid of your symptoms for a little while, but didn’t actually cure you. Neither you nor Gen were medical professionals in the slightest and had no idea how to go about using the antibiotic on the hanahaki disease. Maybe if you took it regularly, you would've lived. Maybe if you had taken it earlier. Maybe. 
The feeling was bittersweet. In your last moments, you could see your life flash before your eyes, and you internally laughed at the cliché. You saw yourself grow up in the village, befriending Kohaku, Chrome, Ruri, Kaseki and Suika. You saw yourself hunched over Senku to watch him experiment with something, a smile on his face and your eyes wide with awe. You saw many memories with Senku, some of them being times where you felt like you had a chance. Times when you caught Senku staring at you, rare times where Senku showed a bit more vulnerability and talked more openly about his past. He grew just like you did, and you did it together.
You hoped he would forgive you. You hoped everyone would, because in the end, you didn’t regret loving Senku Ishigami. Hopefully in the next life, you were able to start that next chapter with him. 
367 notes · View notes
levisgirll · 3 years
Note
could i pls request one where the reader is having trouble eating consistently throughout the day and doesn't rlly eat much and this is where levi starts to notice and helps and comforts her? it's been hard for me to eat these last several weeks, also if you're not comfortable writing ab this you don't have to do this!
𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐨𝐤𝐚𝐲 (𝐋𝐞𝐯𝐢 𝐀𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫)
→ Text: Hello there Anon! Thank you for sending a request to me and of course I will be glad to write this for you! And, sorry this took a while but I really do hope you see this as I tried my best with it! Also, I am sorry to hear that you are having trouble eating. Since it has been awhile I hope you are doing better now?🥺 ♡♡♡  It must be difficult but don’t forget that you are strong enough to make it this far and I am proud of you! Hang in there, things will get better soon, trust in yourself <3 
Synopsis: Levi was quick to notice the person he loves most which is Y/N for a while that they were struggling with something. So, Levi observed them for a while and then noticed how Y/N was actually having trouble not eating much. And, it was just an instinct that Levi went out to comfort and help Y/N in his own way. Which made you realize his love for you, and you only, and how soft/sweet Levi Ackerman is towards Y/N. Find out what are the things he does and says!
Trigger Warning, some mentions of eating disorder (but focusing more on levi comforting them), angst, cute fluff, modern au, headcanons imagine♡ —
It was hard, extremely hard, and you tried your best to eat consistently throughout the day, whenever you went out hanging out with Levi, and whenever you were alone. You really did. But, all alone and not letting anyone know about it because you were quite worried and concerned to even mention it, especially to Levi, you found it hard to manage this by yourself.
Whenever Levi came over to your place, or has taken you out for lunch/dinner he noticed you won’t eat much and even skipping it, and he started to wonder if it was because you hated the choices he picked and took you or you had enough of outside food with him. But, he later observed you and had noticed you were actually struggling to eat nowadays and he wanted to talk to you, to be of use and support you. After all, you are someone to him he cared and loved.
So, he decided to come over to your place and have a chat with you, because Levi was slowly starting to be worried for you.
“Hey, Y/N. I want to talk to you about something. Come sit with me?” Levi said as he sat down on your couch, leaning forward while he rested his elbows on his thighs. He looked towards you, at your eyes which had a surprised look.
“S-Sure.” Y/N said nervously and sat from the opposite side, not sure if Levi was mad at something.
“I...have been noticing that you aren’t enjoying our lunch and dinner hangouts recently, and I also noticed you usually reject my hangouts whenever we go out to eat. Did I...do something?” He sounded quite sad and also concerned. He wanted to make sure the relationship you both had was still going good, because he loved hanging out with you and spending every minute with you. To Levi, you were his everything and he wanted to progress with this relationship and bond but to do that, he had to also make sure you were comfortable and he wanted to really help you out and be there for you!
You were taken aback from his comment, surely he misunderstood the situation, Levi started talking about how he was feeling worried  if he might have done something wrong and he had also personally observed the way you were behaving different nowadays towards him.
“No Levi...You never did anything. It’s just that...” You looked away from him and looked down towards your hands that you rested on your lap, you wanted to tell him, but you were not sure how.
But then, you felt his both hands on top of yours and he held it tightly when he bent forward, and looked at you filled with love and concern. “Just what?” He was paying close attention to what you were saying, and Levi sat there patiently and calmly, waiting whenever you wanted to respond or not.
You let out a sigh and with his touch, him caressing your hands, you held his hand back and relaxed. You decided to say instead what was on your mind to Levi. “Just, I am kind of struggling to eat nowadays Levi. It’s been hard for me to eat the past few weeks and...I am trying to but it’s kind of hard.” You said, with such a sad tone it broke Levi’s heart to hear that from someone he loved. 
But, he was glad. Levi was glad and relieved to hear that you were finally telling him what was on your mind, and how you were feeling because that was important to him. And, the fact that how Levi started the conversation in a gently and safe environment and both talked about how Y/N and Levi were feeling made it much easier for Y/N to see that Levi just actually cared for them and decided to let him know. 
Ever since you had let him know about this, Levi takes account to this and starts to help you in his own way which is filled with love with every act he does.
Levi kind of understood you as he himself, is insomniac, and he struggled to sleep but ever since with your presence and whenever you both had sleepovers, it has helped him had some extra hours of sleep and he was glad he told you and shared that with you ever since you both got close. Him letting you know about it made it less harder for him and easier for him to accept it as he didn't feel all alone anymore. Levi felt really lucky to have you. And now, he wants to give that back to you but x2, he wanted the same thing for you. “Let’s do this together.” Levi would say and he held on your hand, meaning every word he is saying.
Once you have told him you don’t really eat much, Levi gave you space to talk about how they’re feeling and what was going on for them. Levi would be very patient and would honestly listen to every word you say and keep a note of it. He would never and not even think of being annoyed about their eating habit’s as he knew it was something difficult for you and honestly, he was proud of you to have made it everyday all by yourself. He found you even stronger than him.
“Hey, I’m not good with words but, I want you to know I care about you brat. And...I am always there to help, so don’t you dare hesitate with me.” He said and ruffled your hair with a slight blush on his cheeks.
After you were slowly trying to recover, once Levi surprised you and decided to break the routine and made you light homemade food instead to encourage you a bit to eat something if you wanted to. He came over for a movie night and made food for the both of you. And, if you tried or tasted his food even just a little bit, he would smile at you and lean in to give you a soft kiss on your cheek. “I’m proud of you sweetheart.” 
‘s-sweetheart?!’ you thought as your cheeks felt hot and you looked away feeling really shy. Y/N was surprised to how Levi was being too soft and sweet, and you actually found it so cute that you both ended up cuddling each other on the couch. “Tch, you really are clingy huh?” Levi said with a smirk and joked. He made you give out a small laugh as it was ironic coming from him, and that, really really, warmed his heart. Tonight was just special for the both of you and he made you feel so special that evening. You really loved him.
Although, Levi would constantly tell you that if you ever needed his help in anyway, or to even hear you out, he was so ready for that. It was his most effective way of showing you his full support, just for you. And, it all came from his heart. 
Levi would also research and read more about how to help ‘a loved one who struggles to eat’ and ask for tips from Hanji and Armin, because he really wanted all the best for you. Your happiness is his happiness too.
Whenever Levi goes out to see his old friends, he would still ask if you would like to join. He knows that even if they do not join him, he would still ask you, making Y/N feel valued as a person and always Levi trying to include them in things. Once, Y/N went out to see Mikasa, Historia and Armin to a dessert place and Levi tagged along with Y/N. He would order for himself black tea and Y/N hot chocolate while the others would get themselves some ice cream, waffles and cakes. 
While everyone is eating and chatting, Levi would put his hand on top of your lap and caress it. Making sure you are feeling alright and he is there for you no matter what. While you saw the desserts being sweet, you thought Levi’s act was even sweeter to you and it warmed your heart. He then would lean in and whisper to your ear as the others were chatting, “I know this can be hard, and there seem to be lots of food around, but you don’t have to eat it all alright?” Levi said calmly and held your hand, he understood you so well and he knew you were still in recovery so it was a great reminder for Y/N to help them feel in control again. He really helped you out and you felt so happy sharing this with him now.
One night, you got so fed up and felt really overwhelmed. So, you decided to call Levi to come over to your place while sobbing. He came so fast, you have no idea. Hearing you tear up during the phone call, broke his heart and he wanted to hold you right now. As he entered your flat, you quickly got up, eyes swollen from your tears, “I-I..” but you suddenly got pulled towards him and Levi hugged you so tightly. That simple hug, you felt all his love towards you, and it really calmed you down and warmed your heart instead of your body. “Shhh, It’s okay. I got you.”
Levi would definitely build up your self-esteem, after all you were such a great and strong person, not everyone can handle this and it was hard. So, the fact you were for several weeks, along dealing with it, Levi would let Y/N know how strong they are, and he would tell them what a great person they are and how much Levi appreciated having Y/N in his life.  “Y/N. I know this is difficult, but I am proud of you.”
The fact that Levi was constantly trying to find out more about eating disorders and how to support them, with that act itself shows that Levi actually really cared and it helped him understand how they might be feeling. So, he would always during nights you both slept together during the weekends, he would whisper soft and gentle things to you, making you feel so much good. “Y/N...You are doing really well.” He would say as he softly caressed your cheeks with his thumb as you both laid on the bed, while you hugged around his waist. “Thanks, Levi. That means a lot.” You said and softly teared up, finally feeling so much better after a long time. “Don't thank me, I want to be here for you if you ever need me.”  Those simple words, made you tear up even more, it was just the way he said it, and how he focused on your eyes, his love is real for you. That evening, you shared a lot of love together <3 It made the both of you feel amazing!
And, when you started to eat something little by little and you told him about it or he has seen it, he would give you a smile which was quite rare to see sometimes but he has become softer with you, showing you a side only you see and no one else. “See? I believe in you. You look really happy.” and he meant it. Levi has always been honest to you and that is a strong factor of his as he does not say that easily. With all of his small comments and encouragements he has given you, it made you feel so amazing whenever you ate something even small and he made sure to make you feel good about it.
If you perhaps eat something and it made you feel down about it, Levi would be sure to cheer you up about it and try to joke around to make you laugh. Doing that to make you forget your negative thoughts and he would shower you with love too, by kissing your forehead and saying “It’s going to be okay Y/N, really.”
You won’t miss a day of Levi not sending you a text, you are after all always in his mind because he is in love with you. So he would text or call you and say “How are you doing?” He wants to know if you are doing well and what you were up to so he can see you later on the day <3
Levi one day surprised you and you got a delivery from him, it was a bouquet of roses with a box of chocolate and he left you a handwritten note saying “You look amazing. -Levi.” and that simple note, made you not stop smiling throughout the whole day and squealing about it to Hanji.
After a while, Levi finally took his chance and with time he finally confessed his love to you and how much he deeply cared and cherished you. “I love you, and I don’t think of you any differently.” Levi would say to you under the beautiful nightsky. Levi then reassure them that they are worthy and loved, and nothing they say or do will change that to him.
Ahh anon I really hope you liked this and if anyone read this I hope you did too! This came out so soft and fluff to be honest, and I really see Levi being really understandable and all because he also struggles with something else, such as not getting enough of sleep, and he would shower you with comfort, making you also feel so amazing and good? Like imagine Levi saying what I mentioned above, to you! Anyways, if you did like this please then leave a like, a reblog or leaving me message about it! Thank you all <3
178 notes · View notes
dorimena · 3 years
Note
may i have aizawa or todoroki where they're in a meeting and the reader is controlling the vibrator in their hole 👉👈 (also can I be 🍦 anon as well?)
Of course you may! Aizawa’s came to mind first, but I’ll be sure to also post Todoroki’s later this week, so your sin is multiplied. And yes, you can! 𝖂𝖊𝖑𝖈𝖔𝖒𝖊 𝖙𝖔 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖈𝖔𝖛𝖊𝖓𝖙, 🍦 anon (๑˘︶˘๑)
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𝔠𝔥𝔞𝔯𝔞𝔠𝔱𝔢𝔯; aizawa shouta
𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱; 2.0k,
𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰; sex toy (vibrating butt plug), public sex, slight exhibitionism, implied humiliation kink, implied degradation kink, implied bondage, implied edging, cursing, dom!reader, sub!character
𝔬𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔯 𝔱𝔞𝔤𝔰; gender-neutral reader, Aizawa wanted to impress you, sidekick is a voyeur, Aizawa suffering to not show he’s actually a bottom is beautiful.
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𝖁𝖎𝖇𝖗𝖆𝖙𝖔𝖗 𝖎𝖓 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖍𝖔𝖑𝖊.
“Don’t you dare think about it.”
He shakily grumbles to you, closing his eyes momentarily as he tries to compose himself again, crossing his arms to make himself seem unbothered. After all, it’s not every day he’s wearing a vibrating buttplug in public.
“Dare think about what, Eraserhead?” The CEO of some hero agency’s voice asked curiously.
Shit. Now everyone is looking at him. Why is he even wearing this thing?
Oh right.
Before the impromptu meeting about some tip of the whereabouts of another underground drug trafficking ring, he was in the middle of preparing a… surprise for you, when you came back home from wherever you went. But you somehow found out beforehand, because you showed him how the control was in your possession after you caught up with him in the hallway on your way to the same meeting.
So here he is, wearing a promised ‘super intense’ vibrations, black silicone with a matching ‘diamond’ butt plug under his luckily loose hero outfit. 
Grunting to subtly clear his voice and keep it steady, he looks back at the addressing man.
“You want to simply use us to continue patrolling the same areas everyone else seemed to map out already. That-”
You interrupt his answer by turning up the intensity a bit, knowing it’s most definitely poking at his sensitive spot by now. You’ve seen his sly attempts of shifting and adjustment. You’re humming, looking over at him to see how his mouth has clamped shut but his lips are trembling. His body’s rigid, tense, and his back has straightened up considerably. You’re pretty sure you heard him moan lowly.
“Eraserhead?” The man asked again, raising an eyebrow at the sudden loss of words while the room falls silent- shit, they can’t know about the vibrator! Aizawa doesn’t even know how loud it is, he only cleaned it and skipped the trial part.
Swallowing harshly, he hopes his voice isn’t going to betray him and is loud enough to cover up the mysterious buzzing. You aren’t going to be nice with this apparently.
“Th-that we should begin the next s-step…” Never mind, guess his voice fucking hates him and his train of thought.
“I’ll, uh, take that into consideration, and I suppose it could lessen…” and whatever is said after that leaves Aizawa´s focus as you increase the vibrations again, making his thighs want to match the speed and his mind suddenly scream at him to ‘keep yourself composed.’
A vibrator is nothing new.
A butt plug is nothing new.
A vibrating butt plug is new, and doing it in public during an important fucking meeting is making him feel a lot that it’s overwhelming him.
You aren’t even going to let him think or compose himself as you move a little closer to his side, acting like you’re paying attention to what the others are saying, before pinching his inner thigh. 
No one’s paying attention to you two anymore and are starting to get loud, and you wanted him to see that before you murmur.
“Thank you for the gift. I’ll make sure to use it to its full potential.” Now that has him suddenly praying for whichever higher celestial being is there to hear him to please, please, please not let anyone catch on to what’s going to happen.
So, you turn the vibration up a few more settings, holding back a laugh of amusement as he jerks violently in his chair and your hand finds itself trapped between his quivering, muscular thighs, that soon enough begin bouncing as he tries to find purchase on something, anything. His hands gripping the fabric covering his arms isn’t helping. Leaning forward to rest an elbow on the table and resting his forehead on his palm, he uses his other free hand to wrap around your wrist near him because the feeling of your skin touching him always keeps him grounded. Surely this doesn’t look suspicious.
To anyone who would be looking, it just looks like you’re trying to not let the unnecessary noise get to him, but really he’s desperately whispering “slow down, s-slow down!” as he tries swallowing any other embarrassing noise that should only be heard in the bedroom, and soon enough gripping your wrist harder, trying to make your trapped hand touch his aching bulge, twitching for attention.
A strangled whine escapes his dried throat, and that catches the attention of some random sidekick nearby. And when you turn the toy off, Aizawa huffs in disappointment before glaring over at the younger male. It’s enough to have the sidekick smile awkwardly before turning away, feigning ignorance to whatever he might’ve heard.
Now that the coast is quickly cleared, you lean in to swiftly ‘fix’ his weapon and with a hush tell him not to “let anyone know” before turning up the intensity again, this time making sure it’s at the highest the small machine can offer.
Remember when he said he was promised it to be ‘super intense’? He regrets it. He really, really regrets it.
He quickly tries grabbing whatever part of his binding cloth is closest with his mouth to help gag, at least muffle, his sharp cry of your name, gritting his teeth as he tries not to be louder than the debate happening. But with the tip of the butt plug pressing really hard onto his prostate, he can’t help jerking his hips forward and back while letting out airy whines of anything yet nothing.
You’re just watching his reactions, drinking in every slip of noise he makes. You know he’s going to slip up sooner or later, with the way his hips are slowly losing control and his legs are twitching too much to not pass off as suspicious.
Even his cute whines are becoming wanton moans of your name, the binding cloth being forgotten as he loses concentration. He can feel how wet his boxers are, how sticky they feel against his hardened member that twitches on tempo with his thighs. He needs you to touch him there. Please, please, please.
“Pl-please?” He exhales shakily, choking on a small groan as your right hand wiggles around to free itself from his weakening grip.
Before you could answer, you hear someone call his name. Quickly turning off the toy, your left hand lets go of the control in your pocket as you place it on his forehead.
“Eraserhead, are you alright?” The same man from earlier asked. You wonder why he’s so attentive.
“No, sir. He seems to be picking up a fever.” You finish with a worried expression morphing onto your face.
“Oh, then he should go home-”
“I don’t mean to interrupt, but it’s best if he stays. He wouldn’t have come if you’re just gonna send him home.”
You’re so clever, knowing how to justify his loose composure and charm the head prohero behind this mission. He would’ve continued mentally praising it, but he was rudely interrupted since you decided to turn the toy back on to the highest setting.
“O-Oh shiiiiit.” He hisses, opening his legs as he just accepts and welcomes this sensation. This is definitely out of his usual character, but having this butt plug thing tease him for hours, even when off, it was enough to keep him horny and just be ready to satisfy the ache in his dick and the burning desire running throughout his body.
Hell, he’ll even call you whatever you want if it means you’ll let him cum sometime soon so he can pay attention to what’s going on.
Who cares if he’ll walk around with sticky cum on his thighs or leaking through to his pants. That’s the good thing about wearing black.
You eventually decreased the speed so that it’s at a somewhat safe setting, not wanting to overwhelm him so soon after covering his ass, but also to see how long this could drag. He did say it was your gift, so let’s take it to its fullest potential.
Hours passed since you’ve had this toy buzzing inside of him, and even if he’s supposed to feel grateful, he feels more frustration than gratitude. Sure, you’re being considerate, that way he was able to properly take part and become a little more attentive with the meeting, but his painful erection and oversensitive prostate would love to oppose.
Luckily, the meeting looks like it's coming to an end, and even with his occasional hiccupped whines and hushed moans, you’ve grown bored of such constant reactions and you’re missing his outstanding earlier performance. Surely nothing bad is going to happen; he’s put off his ‘fever’ for so long.
It’s time to help him. Pity he’s talking right now.
“So, we’ll send these g-guys... fuck.” Aizawa whispered the last part, twitching with the sudden increase of the speed.
“What was that?”
Just as he was going to reply, you finished increasing up to the last setting once more, humming curiously while the same ‘worried’ expression from before appeared on your face.
His face is completely red, whether in shame, embarrassment, in flushed pleasure, who knows. His eyes are quivering as his brain tries to register the overwhelming intensity of the vibrations, and he thinks he can even feel it in his brain.
He quickly dismisses whatever he was going to say with a singular hand motion, sliding his notes towards you so that you can finish sharing his idea to the others before they turn their eyes on someone else.
Even if the attention isn’t on him anymore, he can’t help but like the idea that they already know what’s going on, with the way the same sidekick from before is also blushing and seems fidgety. He’s trying so hard not to rub himself against your pliant hand, which you never finished slipping away, but he’s so, so sure if he does feel you, he’ll just sob.
It’s too much.
“T-too mu-uch. T-turn i-it down- augh.” He’s trying his best to whisper, but really he’s so overwhelmed he dumbly moans it out into your ear.
You shake your head, ‘accidentally’ brushing your fingertips over his bulge. If only this toy had another setting, maybe that would help make him shameless.
His eyes and throat are burning, shame eating away at his stomach before being overcome slowly by the need to cum. Has he always been this dirty? This easy to let defile? No, god no, but with you he can’t help it. Why else would he have bought a ‘super intense’ black silicone with a matching ‘diamond’ butt plug? It’s obvious he wanted to show it off, be a good boy for you, to treat you right.
So, seeing how you don’t want to turn it down and kind of going against your words of not letting anyone know, this is what you truly want, right? Him not-so-quietly and not-so-nonchalantly lose control over everything going on, with the slight exception of his breathing, while you continue to expose him like this to an uninterested crowd. Maybe he would like a crowd to watch him and mock him? Maybe call him a slut while giggling about how disgusting he is? Being tied up and strapped with a bunch of more vibrators all over his body? Being covered in so much cum he’s too dirty to be touched by anyone?
His grip with himself is loosening and his hips are trying to chase after your fingers or try to grind down some more onto the butt plug. Combining his growing need with his shameless fantasy, he couldn’t warn you properly, or himself, before he abruptly cums hard in his pants, a sob of “please” muffled by  your quick right hand and the one with the remote lowers the speed so it helps ride out his unexpected high and not hurt him. 
The only thing is, that you forget just how long his orgasms can last with just butt play. It’s a toe curling, leg shaking, dick exploding orgasm. It’s enough to suddenly make you wonder if he’ll be able to walk on stable legs.
The meeting ends with everyone confirming all conclusions while you’re whispering sweet affirmations and praises into his ear, pressing your palm harder onto his mouth with every other sob of your name, shameless dumb moaning and the occasional hiccups of gratitude.
Now, how to bribe the poor horny sidekick who has been not-so-secretly watching this whole ordeal into staying quiet?
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n0tamused · 3 years
Note
Hellooo hon can i request pls? Can u write for tobirama a one shot where he rejects his s/o but then he sees her with another guy in the village often and starts to realize about hia feelings but its late bc she is marrying this other guy? I need some angst hahahah. Its ok if you don't want to write it! Thank you 😘
A/N: Hello anon, thank you for the request! Here's some Tobirama angst. It made me sad to write this but here we are. The things we do for angst. Hope you enjoy.
Warnings: none. Just pure sadness.
Words: Around 1.475
' The Fire Which Didn't Burn '
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-"No. I do not love you."
Those words echoed in your mind days after his initial rejection. Over and over again until it was all you could think about. It stung your heart each time you repeated the sentence. The never ending feeling that it was something you did wrong wrecked your mind, it made work harder and rest scarce for a while. You didn't understand. You were sure he felt at least some semblance of love for you, in the end you were the one he truly did let in his company. One he could rely on for anything that he may need. Or did you read the signs that wrong? At that point it wouldn't be a surprise if it was all for business sake, seeing as you both worked together on making the village prosper and bloom.
But that was almost an whole year ago. Even more. Since then you have moved on from the heart ache. Although a few select close friends knew of your pain, you never indulged them with your gloomy moods that came and went. It was a tendency you seemed to pick up from the younger Senju and the years you spent at his side. Not letting anyone really in. Only letting them scratch the surface of it, to know enough to leave you be.
It has been a whole year since the last time Tobirama had spent proper time with you, a whole year since you both sat down to unwind and discuss things amicably. At the confession of your feelings for him he was rather cold, cooly brushing you off and trying to get back into his work. He didn't feel like it was such a big deal then, he believed that it didn't matter as long as you both still remained a good bond. But he was proven wrong. You recoiled from his reach and even disappeared from his sight. His ears seldomly heard of you anymore. It was as if you disappeared from the village all together. Even if he saw traces of your work, your signatures and reports. It was all superficial.
At first this didn't bother Tobirama much, even if he was initially worried about your lack of communication with him. The man was simply so drowned in his work to take some kind of action, to do anything to smooth things over with you again. On certain days, when work was lesser, he would indulge himself in things he did with you once. Only then feeling the effects, the weight on his shoulders due to your absence. There was no more of your reasoning voice, no more laughter, no more endless teasing when the two of you were alone, no more long nights where the two of you shared your worries and even fears. There was none of it. Only distant memories.
As stubborn as he was, he would finally come to terms that he, in the very least, missed you greatly. That he should've done something sooner. Now he felt embarrassed to even try after so long had already passed.
Tobirama had recently started to seek out information about you. Head full of things, horrible things. Were you alright now? Have you moved on?
As it turns out, yes you were alright and yes...you have moved on. You were still working as a ninja, so how you managed to keep out of his sight so much and for so long surprised the silver haired Senju. And when word reached him that you were getting married soon. He was...he didn't know how to feel, actually. You had found another man to love and share your burdens and future with. He had spotted the pair of you once in the village, walking peacefully side by side. Hand and fingers entwined together. You pressing into his side once to give him a quick hug. Him smiling down at you, a genuine, earnest smile which you reflected back just the same. It made Tobirama ill. A deep, gut wrenching feeling over took him so much that he wanted to bolt. As unlikely as that was for him.
Perhaps this was karma. You were his most trusted friend. You understood him at best and at worst times, and you dealt with him when he was being difficult. You were with him at his side even when his brother got fed up with his arrogance. The amount of times you sat at the stairs on his porch, waiting for him to cool off were countless; even your company alone was salve enough. And not to even mention your beauty, you were the rare one that really caught Tobirama's eye, like no other woman has before. And yet, he pushed you away. Perhaps this was his punishment. The maker gave him a chance, a chance to be happy and content and have someone with him and he let it fall and shatter to the floor. Tobirama could only scowl, and he found himself in a sour mood ever since.
He wouldn't admit it but his heart was aching. Was this how you too felt?
-"Tobirama!"
You exclaimed. Shock written all over your features, the basket of fruit, fish and vegetables hooked onto your elbow. Neither of you knew what to say at first. Tobirama was just as shocked as you, regretting not using his sensory abilities to sense you and turn in another direction. Now that you two ran into each other his tongue felt dry.
Your breath stopped in your throat as you searched his eyes, his face for anything that could indicate some sort of reaction. Yet the only thing you found in his scarlet gaze was yearning, and then emptiness once he collected his racing thoughts.
"Y/N. It.. it has been a while."
He spoke, clearing his throat while his heart felt as if it was going to burst out of his chest. The clothes he wore suddenly felt suffocating and scolding. A tangible tension grew between the two of you.
"Yes. It has been...How have you been doing? I surely hope you are getting some proper rest, I heard there was quite a scuffle recently."
Trying to keep the conversation average failed. A frown became prominent on his lips as he only nodded, in a almost mechanical fashion, but didn't respond to the question. You caught his gaze flickering, only for a second, down to your ring finger. Where the silver ring was. A small gem held on the top of it. And you understood, in a way.
"Oh..."
A wind breezed past the two of you, but it didn't feel comforting. It felt chilling and hot and dry all at the same time, like raking hands that clung to the both of you. If you were paying just a little more attention to the Senju, you would've seen the sadness collect in his eyes. Even if his face remained cold and unreadable. His eyes gave it all away.
The conversation ended rather awkwardly with both of you wishing each other well and saying your goodbyes. So many things were left unsaid then. It wouldn't take Tobirama long after that quick encounter to really admit it to himself that he has grown feelings for you, that he was in love. Realizing a year too late. A year he wished he could get back so he could be with you instead of that man. A year that could make it all better, for the both of you. But no matter how many sleepless nights he had, no matter how much he wished and even prayed, he couldn't take your happiness away. He couldn't even dare do such a thing, couldn't dream of it.
Sometimes you would even worm your way in his dreams, his mind visualizing a future he knew he couldn't have. A happy one with you at his side, in a house different from the one he was in now, with enough space for the both of you and even another addition. No matter how much he dreaded those dreams, he let himself drown in the comforts of them even if for a moment. Letting himself experience what could have been. The phantom touches and plush kisses that soon turned to dust in his mouth when he woke. The image of you still dancing vividly in front of his sleep hazed eyes.
Other times he even found himself crying in those dreams, angry, bitter and regretful tears. Clinging onto you in his dreams, pleading to not wake up yet to make it all better. It pained him. That he couldn't have you anymore. You were now married to someone, and that someone wasn't him.
Tobirama saw how happy you were, genuinely. And he wasn't going to take it away just because of his own mistakes.
Now it was his turn to share the pain you went through. He accepted it all. It was now his responsibility. His mistakes.
322 notes · View notes
itsallyscorner · 4 years
Note
Hello, i saw that your request are close atm.😌 but can I request in advance? 😂 (mix!reader) where tom is reacting to fan made videos of the reader and he keeps on fanboying or something and ended up having her as his lockscreen🙃 if it make sense haha. (It just went to my head and share it with you🤓🥰) LOVE YOUR STORIES and i KEEP on re-reading them over and over💕 love lots and I’ll keep supporting you and your stories✨ have a great day
I’m pretty sure this is the request that one anon was referring to! Thank you for the love and support on my blog💕 Once again, sorry for the long wait! I hope you like it💖
💌.
Fanboy
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I wanted to make this a headcanon because there’s just too many scenarios of Tom being a fanboy in my head that I can go on for days😭
If we haven’t established it enough on this blog: Tom is a hardcore and very proud Mixer.
Especially with you in the band, Tom’s support for the girl group was above and beyond.
We love a supportive boyfriend🥺
Obviously, you are his favorite member in the band.
He’s told you straight up that you were his favorite. It was also no secret because everyone knew of his crush on you even before the two of you dated.
He even exposed himself during interviews when asked who his celebrity crush was.
“My celebrity crush? (Y/n) (L/n) without a doubt.”
“You didn’t even hesitate to answer that.”
“Why would I? She’s always been my celebrity crush, she’s gorgeous and hilarious.”
His friends and family enjoyed taking the piss out of him. They constantly teased him about how whipped he was for you.
They pointed out how he would follow you around like a lost puppy and look at you as if you hung the moon and the stars in the sky.
As much as he hated the teasing, he knew they were all right.
He was absolutely in love with you. You were it for him. (Yes I’m quoting Cherry, leave me alone pls)
“Tom, you’re such a simp for (y/n).” Harrison teased him one day.
“Yes and what about it?” He would immediately answer back. Sassily, might I add.
Although Tom wasn’t that big with PDA, he never hid the way he felt for you.
He posted pictures of you on Instagram and freely talked about you during interviews or to anyone in general.
He would also promote the band’s new album or publicly congratulate you guys after winning an award. He’d be so cute, he’ll praise you guys and write about how proud he is of you and the girls🥺
Everyone knew about your relationship, but you guys weren’t the kind of couple to constantly post about your relationship on social media.
It wasn’t a secret but it was lowkey to the point where your relationship had privacy from the nosy world.
But basically, yes, everyone was aware of how much of a simp and major fanboy Tom was.
Many fans caught him liking fan edits of you on Instagram and Twitter.
There were also edits of you he found on Tiktok, but those likes were never found lmao.
Though you weren’t as aware as the fans of him looking at fan edits of you.
Tom enjoyed watching edits of you. Especially when he was away for filming or when you were on tour.
He literally has a folder on his Instagram to save all of his favorite fan edits of you to.
His favorite edits are the ones that show how cute and wholesome you are, the thirst edits, and his most favorite, the crack head edits.
Tom literally goes to YouTube and searches for these videos.
(Y/n) (L/n) being the baby of Little Mix for 10 minutes.
Funny (Y/n) (L/n) moments that butter my quakson.
(Y/n) (L/n) being clumsy on stage for 15 minutes straight.
(Y/n) (L/n) being unintentionally beautiful.
(Y/n) (L/n) moments that make me question my sexuality
You get the gist.
Sometimes you’ll catch him staring at his phone, smiling or biting his lip, while a song played over and over again.
That was just him watching an edit of you repeatedly but you didn’t know that.
Omg why do I see him saving one of those edits from TikTok as a live wallpaper and making it his lockscreen?
Which would probably be how you found out about his little fanboy secret on his phone.
“Darling, can you pass me my phone please?” He asked you from the kitchen. You took his phone from the coffee table in the living room and went to where he was.
Maybe your thumb was pressing down on the screen making the live wallpaper move. You know how it makes your phone like vibrate or something? Yeah, you felt that.
So you looked down and suddenly his wallpaper turned into clips of you. You stopped midway just to watch it.
There were clips of you from music videos, interviews, performances, and even red carpet events.
It was like one of those “play date” edits that were trending around TikTok.
Tom comes out to check on you only to find you smiling at his phone. His eyes widen when he sees what you’re looking at.
“I—uh, I can explain!”
He thought you would find it weird and creepy of him to have a live wallpaper of you as his lock screen.
But you didn’t find it weird, you thought it was cute and adorable of him. It made you realize how wholesome of a boyfriend he was.
He’s instantly relieved when you tell him that.
You’d ask him where he got it and he would open up TikTok, then open his favorites.
Which exposed him because it’s literally a bunch of edits of you.
“Why do you have so many edits of me?”
He shrugs, “I just like watching them. They also help me when we’re apart. The fans make so many good edits of you, you need to watch them.”
Tom then goes on to show you all the edits he’s saved from TikTok.
You guys cuddle on the couch while going through them.
After you’ve gone through most of the ones from TikTok he would open up Instagram.
“Wait, there’s more?”
“Yes, there’s more. I can make about 5 Marvel length films out of all of them.”
He’d be so adorable and click on specific ones to show you because they were his favorite.
“Ooo, baby let’s watch this one. It’s very cute and my favorite song is in it.”
“Can we please watch the thirst edits?”
“Look, this one’s an edit of us. Aren’t we the cutest couple ever?”
Later on you would admit that you also watch fan edits of him.
“Do you really?”
“Yeah, they always pop up on my feed and I end up going down a rabbit hole of fan edits of you.”
Then you guys would go through your phone and watch fan edits of him.
He’d find a lot of them ‘sick’ and asks you to send them to him.
Now that you both knew about your love for fan edits of each other, you guys would send edits to each other all the time🥺
Sometimes you’ll even share them to your stories.
Tom did this the most with edits of you. When he shared the edits to his story he would add comments like:
“😍😍😍😍”
“My beautiful girl”
“Thank you for making an edit of @yourinstagram just laughing. I’ve been missing her so much and this really made my day x”
*thirst edit of you* “I’m the luckiest man in the world😍”
Tom is just the most supportive boyfriend and your biggest fan.
He could watch fan edits of you all day if he could :)
Tags:
*tags with a cross through them do not work*
Little Mix!reader x Tom Holland Taglist
↪︎ @waxingmoonwrites @slutforsebstan @starslazyandcosy @xkonpinkx @dummiesshort @gypsystuf @kielemarie @wroetospidey @thatgirlangelb @have-aheart @adayasgeorgia @xeniarocks @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @agustdowney @itssmadelyn @tomsirishgirlx @imthebadguyyy @roseke @kaylans-imagines
Tom Holland Taglist
↪︎ @lovableparker @aprettyfleur @sunwardsss @dummiesshort @thotforcriminalminds @cuddlykoala101 @itstaskeen @whoslili @white-wolf1940 @tomsirishgirlx @roseke @kaylans-imagines @spideyspeaches @xxstrangegirlxxx @slutforsebstan
General Taglist
↪︎ @quxxnxfhxll @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @thegirlwiththediary @agustdowney
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elysianslove · 4 years
Text
when the stars align; oikawa tōru
requested by anon; ❝ hi bb :) can I request an Oikawa and reader story where they’re two petty/sarcastic best friends. Like they just have that understanding that their love is shown through petty comments or bickering lol but n e ways, the reader gets approached by a guy she doesn’t really like but isn’t thinking and says she’s seeing Oikawa and now they have to act like a couple but all they end up doing is bickering and Oikawa complaining. I hope that makes sense lol thxx <3 ❞
pairing; oikawa tōru x reader 
warnings; it’s the fake dating trope with oikawa tōru. that is a warning in itself
note; i screamed when i found this in my inbox this trope has a special place in my heart and the fact that oikawa was requested??? pls don’t let this flop :(
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━ you’re not sure why you said it. you rack your mind for an excuse: you’ve known him too long, you spend majority of your time with him, you had just been texting him a moment earlier — that must’ve been why you’d sprouted that ridiculous excuse to rid yourself of spewing out a futile, useless rejection. there’s an array of mixed emotions on you as you watch the boy before you shrivel in disappointment, sighing in frustration.
“i’m sorry, i’m dating oikawa right now, actually,” you had said, like the liar the same boy you refer to has coerced you into becoming to fuel your endless sneaking out.
the guy before you, honestly nameless due to both your carelessness towards him and your uncomfortableness around him, shoves his hands into his pockets cooly, attempting to shrug it off. “well, you know where to find me in case it doesn’t work out,” he jokes, and you have to fight off the urge to cringe directly in his face at his words.
instead, you lightly smile, more similar to a grimace, and nod politely, before turning and heading in the complete opposite direction, despite the other way having been your initial route. your shaky hands fumble for your phone, and you pull it out, unlocking it and tapping on the messages app.
i did something stupid, you type out, and you’re unsure whether you’re grateful or thrown off by how quick oikawa responds.
not surprising. what did u do
the familiarity of his tone only calms you slightly, and before you can talk yourself out of it, already having thrown yourself too deep when you’d thought up the lie, you explain the situation briefly. instead of a text message response, his caller id flashes across your screen, and your breath hitches. regret begins flooding you, and carefully, you slide to answer.
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“i don’t want to hold your hand!” you complain, smacking at his palm when it reaches for yours.
oikawa sighs amusingly, grabbing your wrist anyways and linking your fingers together. against all odds, and to your disappointment, you shiver at the feel of his hand in yours. it’s considerably larger, and despite the fact that this is farthest from the first time you’ve gripped his hand, your insides twist. his fingers are slender, and his palm and the pads of his fingers are soft. for all the years you’ve known oikawa, his hands constantly run cold, and you’ve hated it for multiple reasons. one being the way it gave him an ego boost of ‘cold hands only mean i have a warm heart.’ the second being his infuriating actions of constantly pressing his palms to your skin, specifically the back of your neck. but most importantly, it signifies just how little oikawa tends to care for himself at times, the way his hands shake when it gets too cold, when the world grows too small, the tips of his fingers a bruised blue and purple. and you hate it. even more so, you hate how much you hate it.
despite all this, his hand feels — nice in yours; it’s a comfortable contrast to your own warm hand. still, your frown remains on your face as you see the school gates appear before two of you, never daring to reveal any of your thoughts to him.
“if you didn’t want to hold my hand, you would’ve thought up a better lie,” oikawa argues, and you turn your head to glare at him. he diffuses it easily when his thumb brushes against the back of your hand, your words faltering momentarily. “could’ve had anyone! iwa, mattsun, makki— i know they woulda loved to do this with you.”
“you’re insufferable,” you huff, but your cheeks are painting red, visibly too. he’s right, you realize. he’s terribly right.
“but you still chose me,” he teases.
your hand in his twists until you’re bending his wrist at an awkward, painful angle, until he’s pinching at your arm to force you away. he’s right, but that doesn’t make it mean anything.
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by now, you’ve spent more time glaring at oikawa threateningly and in warning than you have your entire friendship with him, and it’s honestly starting to give you a headache. after admitting your situation to the three other third years, and giving them maximum fifteen minutes to laugh until they ran out of breath, iwaizumi included, spend the next twenty minutes huddled up next to oikawa, your chair attached to his.
the guy, who had been persistent enough in asking you out that you’d resorted to this, decided to spend his lunch break in the same area as the five of you, leaving you unable to push away and bicker with oikawa the same way you would any other day. you pick at your food as you avoid his gaze, oikawa’s arm around your shoulder heavy, leaving a trail of sparks up your spine and along your arms. it makes you want to scream, loudly too.
makki and mattsun have resorted to making fun of the guy, whispering between themselves, but it’s still awfully loud enough that there’s no possible way he can’t hear. iwaizumi and oikawa have their attention on each other, discussing some upcoming practice match in the weekend.
and all you’re left with are your thoughts, your nagging, unbearable thoughts, about how pretty oikawa’s hand looks as it hangs by your shoulder, brushing against your arm with every small shift of his body. with shameful, red cheeks, you shut your eyes in frustration, and allow the regret to boil and build in your stomach.
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the weeks pass steadily. outside of school, your relationship with oikawa remains unchanged, and although he’s just as touchy as he is with you with an audience, the source of affection continues to be — simply friendship. and whenever you catch any disappointment building because of that, you pinch yourself in reminder than none of it is real. the way he always has an arm around you, the way he fumbles with your fingers, the way he ties your hair back for you while you work on an essay during your break, the way he kisses your cheek, a show of respect for your boundaries, but as a way to reinforce that you’re his in front of anyone, or the way he lets you lift one leg over his own, just because.
and you’re left wondering that if it were real, would it be the same?
he sits before you now, cross legged on your bed, back straightened and mouth stuffed with popcorn, completely engrossed in the movie before him with his eyes wide open. the three other boys are spread across the room: makki laying on his stomach, chin perched on his hands by the edge of the bed, while mattsun and iwaizumi share the couch, drinks in their hands, all three just as enamored by the movie as oikawa. 
you had always been aware of just how pretty he is, and everyone around you has always ensured that you do. was it the way the light from the screen shone in his face, reflecting in his pretty brown eyes and shadowing some of his features? or was it the way he sat so comfortable in your bed, in nothing but sweatpants and a loose shirt because, of course, the four of them were bound to stay the night? was it the way his lips glistened with the water he gulped, or because of the way his tongue poked out to lick at the salt from the popcorn? 
or was it nothing in particular, or everything all at once?
sighing lowly, you shift and sit up, swinging your legs over the side of the bed and heading towards the bedroom door. “i’m gonna grab some water; anyone want anything?” you announce.
none of them seem to hear you, too lost in the movie, but makki turns his head to the side slightly, eyes remaining on the screen, and replies, “no thank you.” it’s all you need to leave the room.
as you walk out, oikawa eyes you, then eyes the filled up water bottles next to where you had been sitting. his heart tightens in his chest.
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two months into the fake relationship you’d established with oikawa, and it begins to feel natural. it no longer feels off putting to walk hand in hand with him to school, or to greet him with a grandiose hug and a kiss on the cheek, or to wear his jersey to games and cheer for him from the stands, or to constantly have his ankle looped with yours beneath the table where, despite this all being for show, nobody can really see.
outside of your fake relationship traditions are your friendship traditions, which include, but are not limited to, him walking you home. it’s always been mostly because your mother adores him, or because he prefers the food that’s at your home as opposed to his, or because your home is on the way to his anyways, but it’s a lot closer, so he always ends up staying longer than anticipated.
either way, it’s not unusual that he walks by your side as the moon illuminates your path. it is, however, not very like him to stay quiet the entire way. you can see the roof of your home growing in size as you near it, and he’s yet to say a word to you. it both weirds you out and worries you, and before you can convince yourself you were overreacting, you pause in your step, the gravel beneath you scratching and crunching as you turn to face him.
“alright, spit it out.”
his eyes meet yours, wide and confused. “what?”
you sigh. “something’s up, and you’re either gonna tell me now or i’ll force it out of you later,” you reply.
“i’m not—”
“oikawa.”
“stop it, i’m fine—“
“tōru.”
“i can’t do this anymore.”
your heart stills, and almost as if in understanding, in pity, so does the world around you. the wind no longer howls in agony, respecting your need for silence as the trees around you look on curiously. your brain processes a little slower than your mouth, and you’re asking him, “what are you talking about?” before you could think.
his gaze falls from yours again, and he takes a step back. “i can’t be with you anymore. or — fake being with you anymore,” he admits to you.
you’re not sure why, but you had imagined this scenario to be a lot less earth shattering than it is. maybe you’d grown to like faking it, because it slowly started to become the closest you could get to experiencing it realistically. you refuse to speak, and it isn’t because you’re angry at him. it’s because you genuinely are lost for words. it’s not even a real break up, but it still hurts just as bad, if not worse. it’s your own fault for believing that this, whatever this was, was as simple as it seemed.
“not unless— not unless i can really be with you.”
what?
“what?”
he breathes in steadily, and moves forward, closer, closer, closer to you. his hands rise to your cheeks, cupping them softly, flinching when your breath hitches. but you make no move to push him away, only stare up at him, in wonder, in confusion. he opens his mouth, preparing himself to speak. you expect a monologue, a speech, a declaration of his undying love for you, because it sounds just as dramatic as oikawa is. the moon above you holds its breath, waiting for the band to snap, for the words to spill and drown you. 
but then he kisses you. 
his hands urge you up and he meets you halfway, pressing his lips to yours. they’re soft, and he tastes like cherry, and it’s probably your chapstick if you were being honest with yourself. his mouth moves languidly against yours, as if he’s trying to drag out every moment, as if he wants to purposefully slow down time, begging and pleading for the world around him to stop. the kiss is sweet, gentle, and somehow, kissing him is exactly the way you’d imagined it would. it’s breathtaking, and dizzying, and overwhelming, and needy and it’s beautiful. 
when he pulls back, he doesn’t let go of you. his hands remain cupping your jaw, his mouth hovering over yours. his thumb brushes along your cheek momentarily as he gazes at you, admiring you, as if memorizing every inch and every detail of your features. 
“tōru, you idiot,” you sigh. the insult isn’t foreign to him, not even on your tongue, but he still looks taken aback, and even more so when you reach up and close the distance between you again. the world lives again, the moon celebrating within the clouds, the wind twisting in your hair, whispering and whistling cheerfully by your ear as the trees dance.
 it all comes together, and the stars finally align. 
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end note; i’m so happy with this!!! i hope everyone enjoyed reading this as much as i loved writing it!!! <3
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banigarubug · 4 years
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Bad Days (Corpse x FEM!Reader)
anon, this was 100% a vent fic for me. sorry! enjoy :] (also a lot of my usual writing style bled into this so ... u get a taste of what ur missing if ur not on my ao3!)
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can you write a corpse x reader fic where the reader is having a really bad day and is trying to self isolate but corpse doesn't let them and just cuddles them and is all soft and shit🥺🥺 she/her or they/them pronouns pls and thank uu <3
you like to push people away on bad days. corpse knows it, but he loves you anyway. Y/N is your name
warnings: swearing, angsty thoughts, sad but happy in the end
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You know those days, when you wake up cold and you look out the window and the sun is up but it just feels dark? How the pretty white clouds seem charcoal grey in your eyes, and the whole world is spinning too fast for you to catch your balance?
For you, today is one of those days.
First of all, waking up was hard enough. Something about pulling yourself out of bed made your feet feel like rocks against the shitty wood floor of the room you share with Corpse. And it’s a pandemic, so all you did was shower, put your sweatpants back on, creep into the kitchen for your Zoom class and close the drapes so no sunlight came running in. Hours passed of lectures upon lectures, the words barely registering in your mind, and you deliberately did not scroll by and check your grades at any point. You knew what they would say. Finally, class ends, but the day isn’t over yet. You still have work to do and bills to pay, studying, research papers, books to read and calls to make.
(At some point, the little nagging voice in your head wondered if you’d even make it out alive.)
You finish up with your priorities, stuff for your job and stupid legal paperwork. It’s been a full day by the time you’re done, the oven clock beeping out 4:00, but it feels like an hour and also a hundred years have passed simultaneously. A compulsive click to open a new tab leads you to Twitter, and the first tweet on your timeline is something shitty, and you fight the urge to throw your laptop against the wall. Instead, you slam it shut and decide you’re done for the day, done with faking it and stressing out and looking through the window, hoping something interesting will happen. You don’t stomp, but it’s close, and you throw yourself on your bed. Corpse is streaming, so when you reach out for a hand to hold, the bed is empty beside you.
You train your eyes on the ceiling, focusing on your breathing, but it doesn’t feel like anything is going to be okay. You’re angry and sad and stressed and all you want to do is kick a wall, but you can’t because then you’d have to pay to fix the dent.
Your phone, stored in your back pocket, dings once. After a long, dwindling moment - one Mississippi, two - you shuffle to the side and pull it out. It’s from Corpse.
Movie tonight? I can end stream rn if u want
You hesitate, but before you can lie to him - i’m okay, take your time - he double texts:
Or do u wanna come hang out while I stream? Up to u
It would be fun, you know that, and it would make you feel better, but you want to wallow, too. It’s how you deal: you wallow in isolation, you push everyone away, you come back still as shitty as before but with a better mask.
I’m good, love u
You can practically hear the scoff in his reply.
Ok I’m ordering u to come stream with me
“Fine,” you mutter to yourself, grumpy as ever. You put on a better hoodie - as if anyone but Corpse is going to see you - and make your way into the streaming room. The closer you get, the clearer his voice becomes. He must be the imposter - he’s talking to the chat.
“Hey, thanks for the donation, Bailey.” He clicks around, and you shuffle closer to the door. “I’m glad you’re excited for her to join us, that’s really nice.” You pause: He’s talking about me? “I think Y/N had a bad day today. Which is why I’m making her hang out with me right now.”
Your hand rests on the doorknob, waiting. He continues. “She’s in school, so - it’s hard. I mean, I dropped out so I wouldn’t know, but I assume it’s hard. Anyways, I thought it’d be fun.”
You open the door, and he notices you immediately, swiveling in his chair to look at you and smile. Immediately, weight lifts off your shoulders and the stress begins to melt away, and you’re in a haze as you walk over to him and crawl onto his lap wordlessly. He laughs, loud in the way he does when he’s really, really happy, and wraps an arm around your waist to balance you. “Hi,” he says, and you brush away a strand of hair from his face. You lean down and press a kiss to the eyepatch he’s wearing, right along the leather lining of it.
“Hey,” you reply. “Hi, guys,” you add, turning to the microphone. “Thanks for letting me join you today,” you say, both to the chat and to Corpse. Corpse grins, pulls you in closer, and plays the whole game like that, chin resting on your shoulder and face half-buried in your hair.
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