#oops hi Tord

[baconcolacan]

Hello! Welcome to the dad offs!! How dad are you???

[drunkonduty]

the gang but as zombehs :]

I like to think that matt is the smartest when they get infected

TW SLIGHT GORE (??)

[eddsworldrus]

Have a cyborg , still something human in there

[troublehotel-sys]

okay soo yeah im looking to connect with A tord :P and i'm not a part of a system, i'm a psychotic singlet. i have memories with you (tord) and i have no idea where they came from, since i'm not even from eddsworld. aughh this is super confusing but it'd be cool to talk to you lol

🕷️I mean shit yeah sure, I wouldn't mind talking. Though obviously I'm definitely not going to have any of those memories. Talking about source memories is always fun anyway, even if they don't match up at all. And feel free to send us a dm, we CAN stick to asks if you want they're just awkward cuz. we only half get notified so

[thepolysworldau]

( Some doodles I did today )

( translation: )

Jon: Oops, think I mixed up who would be Jessica!

Laurel: No problem, I think it is funnier this way-

Jon: Heh, yeah!

( translation: )

Told Tord they could ask about his demon

Not the questions he was expecting

[lilanuudeli]

Meeting in a party pt. 2 (Tomtord fanfic)

"What? What do you mean you don't?" Tord asks, still confused. "I don't kno-" Tom starts, but gets cut off by Edd and Matt. "Tord! there you are! I see Tom already found you." Edd says. "Hey Edd, could I possibly crash at your place?" Tord asks. "You... blew up our house, remember?" Edd says. The caramel haired man realizes. "Oh yea, that... uhh... Then where do you live now...? Or are you staying in a hotel?" Tord asks. "We bought new apartments, but Tom has the biggest." Matt says. Tom looks at Matt and quietly says 'shut up'. "Are you suggesting I should stay with the person I hate the most?" Tord asks, throwing a quick side eye at Tom. "Yup. I mean, he has the most space." Matt says. Tord stays quiet.

There's a bit of silence before Tord talks again. "I mean, it wouldn't hurt me, would it, Thomas?" Tord says, looking at Tom with a slight side eye. "Unless I harpoon you again." Tom says with a slight smirk. "And please, it's Tom." he adds. "Jehova's witness." Tord says. "Commie." Tom answers.

A bit later, as they all got home. Tord followed Tom to his apartment. "Hey, Commie?" Tom says, looking behind and Tord. "Yea?" -"You're sleeping on the sofa." Tom says. "I wasn't planning on sleeping with you anyways, idiot." Tord replies, seeming a bit annoyed.

~Next morning~

Tord wakes up to the smell of breakfast. He sits up on the sofa, looking towards the kitchen, seeing Tom making breafast pancakes. He stands up and walks to Tom. "Pancakes?" Tord asks, looking over Tom's shoulder. Tom nods. "Not related to the conversation, but I heard there's a visiting market downtown tonight." Tom says. The red wearing friend looks at him, suprised. "Really? Do you know what's in there?" Tord asks him. "Mmh, there was jewelery, drinks, mirrors and band products. There might've been old soldier clothes too. And could you back off a bit? You're basically breathing on my neck right now." Tom points out. Tord realizes how close he is and quickly steps back. "Oops."

Later, all four went to the market. Edd went to the drinks, searching for cola, and Matt went immediatly for a new mirror, leaving Tom and Tord alone. Tom is just wandering around, not knowing where to go. Neither does Tord. He's just following Tom like a lost puppy. "Why are you just following me?" he asks Tord. "I don't wanna be alone." Tom raises a brow at Tords excuse. "Whatever." he says, rolling his black eyes at Tord. "Well I can go somewhere el-" Tord gets cut off by a little girl suddenly clinging onto his sleeve. "H-hey... I-I l-lost my m-mum... c-could you help me find h-her...?" the little girl asks Tord, looking up at his silver eyes. Tord nods. "Of course, dear." -"C-Can blue come t-too?" the little girl asks him. Tom looks at the girl. "Me? You want me to come too?" he asks, confused. the little girl nods.

[yoinkschief]

Merman Tord can survive out of water for about half an hour but when he's been crawling around for longer than that he begins to get dehydrated. An hour or longer and it becomes harder for him to breathe and he starts to feel weak and thirsty.

OKAY DAMN I SEE YOU I SEE YOU SHEEZ

Tord can survive for like, exactly 30 minutes outside of any body of water, preferably salt water though, before he starts choking on,,, well,, nothing. So suffocating, that's the word. But this is only because his body goes into survival mode and uses up what water it has left in, on and around it to filter into oxygen before he doesn't have any left (And yes I do mean on his skin, like a frog) This can change though, depending on the weather or where exactly he's outside of the water Like, say he's in the middle of summer, he's basically gonna dry up like a fish stick, but if it's winter he gets like,,, an extra 15 or so minutes of breathing just because his body exhausts his resources slower while he goes into hibernation mode, yk? Weird anatomy shit

Additionally, I'd like to think that Tord does that thing where you just forget to breath, but instead of it being a thing where like "oops I'm too focused on this task, forgot I had bodily functions to attend to" and more of "OH MY GOD I HAVE TO DO THIS SHIT MANUALLY???" Cause he's just so used to his body having to manually intake air, like "lungs" are this new thing to him, he's used to body just casually filter the oxygen out of water for him that he just forgets to do it. But he does like RELIGIOUSLY drink water, like a SHIT TON of it. There's no real need other than a placebo effect where he convinces himself that it does something for him- it doesn't. He has a normal human body now so he has no need for water more than the average person does. HOWEVER, he can't drink sea water. He found this out the hard way and REGRETTED it, which was a NEW FEELING for him- the salt in it was unexpected. He didn't realize human tastebuds were little bitches but here we are. Edd and Tom witnessed him trying to drink it and Tom couldn't stop fucking laughing, but to be fair neither could Edd.

Also I'd like to add that the amulet around his neck is from Edd, the resident magic man of the crew. He gave it to Tord to as a sort of "prison" for him cause Captain Tom was scared that Tord would find a way to escape like the little escape artist he was so they wanted to make him,,, weak, persay. At least somewhat incapacitated and harming the merchandise was off the table. As a compromise, Edd gave him the necklace cause it said something along the lines of "grants those who are immortal who wear it mortality" and they assumed it would do something to hinder Tord, maybe make his freakish fish person strength null at least and he ended up Ariel-ing his way into being the Swab of the crew so he'd be in the Captain's line of sight at all times and too busy to think of an escape. (Just to be safe, of course, Edd more or less added some curse to it that allowed only himself to take the amulet off of his neck and no one else, so if Tord ever did try to take it off he'd zappered)

[hxneychai]

I like to be like oh I'm so normal about tord eddsworld but I'm not. I could go on for hours about tord eddsworld, please ask me to go on for hours about tord eddsworld.

[redleadurr]

in your guide you said to watch hammer and fail first but the wouldn’t like they not know who tord is

my guide isnt very perfect, i just personally thought that hammer & fail showed most of how the characters are + the neighbors

as much as i love tord, hes gone for a good chunk of the series... i did include spares (& mentioned zombeh attack) on my guide with the intention of showing a bit of him, but for introductory purposes i wanted people to learn more of the feel of the show and the current reoccurring characters (as a hook mostly). afterwards i feel like people will end up eventually learning about tord themselves as they go through the rest of the show if they end up liking it. purposely said to not watch the end until they have made sure to watch everything so that they arent lost on who he is haha

but yeah... my guide isnt perfect like i said, i just structured it on how i think would help people understand how the show is... i based that guide off a less neater guide i made for a friend who ended up going thru the show fine & liking it, but theres probably WAY better guides out there 😅

[larkermarker]

Finally got around to making a super simple ref sheet for my ew redesigns. These have been floating around in my head for around a year.

These are also the designs for my eddswhirl au. To keep it short, eddswhirl is just my spin on the main series. An au where I can shove my headcanons and interpretations that might not be canon compliant. Also timeline and story changes that I want to make.

Some additional design notes below

Tom possession timeline thing I made this quickly agahag

Details for each stage

4 to 7

Not possessed yet

Just a normal kid with big pupils

8 to 12

Got possessed by a wrath demon a few years ago (thanks to dad)

The demon is affecting Toms body physically

Eyes fully black now

Doesn’t like that kids point that out all the time

A little self conscious about his eyes

13 to 17

Teeth are growing in unnaturally sharp

Braces are barely helping

Anger management issues

Shifts a little under extreme stress or anger but can’t change into a full monster yet

Thinks his black eyes make him look cool and edgy (just like all those ocs he saw online that use black eyes when they turn evil)

18 to 36

Not experiencing any new major changes to his regular form

Alcohol helps keep him emotionally numb (the demon can affect his emotions even when not under stress)

Can shift into full monster form now (he can't really control it)

37 to 38

Demon is taking over more of Toms body

More features from his monster form or bleeding into his normal form

It is exhausting Tom physically and mentally trying to keep it down

Lashes out more

38 to 39

Finally gets a successful exorcism preformed (parents tried in the past but it didn't work)

He is a lot happier and expressive with that thing gone

Eyes turn back to normal (cursed) but still has sharp teeth

Over all he is feeling good

40 to (when he dies?)

Oops! Tom developed eye cancer after some time

The demon was the only thing preventing that from happening (it wanted to keep its host alive so it protected, or lessened, most inner and outer damage that came to Tom)

His eyes are completely white

Got a visor (thanks Tord) to help him see again

And some Tord rambles (he is all i have the most thought out rn)

Tord is not totally evil in this au

He does initially plan on taking over the world, but chickens out of going through it

His dad sucks (also one of the motivations for Tord wanting to take over) and he doesn't like to think of him

His mother and him have a strained and distant relationship

They do bond more as Tord gets older

Tords family moved to the UK when he was a teen

No one knows he is trans until after a few year living with the other 3 boys (he told them)

Likes to joke that he is the straightest in the house

Still likes his anime, guns, and robots

Dated Matt for a few months before he left

He left for around 6-8 years to join the army and to go to uni

He knew Paul for a few years before join the army

Tord was planning on going to uni to improve his engineering

Was also going to go back to the house to improve his giant robot prototype, he knew it was far from being battle ready

Skip to a few years in uni and now Tord was having second thoughts on the whole red army thing

He tried to get in contact with Paul but he couldn't reach him

The contact info must have been changed on Pauls end

There has been someone continuing Tords plan behind his back, a left over Tord clone from "Spares" (im going to call clone Tord, Red)

Red had made it look like Tord changed his mind on going to uni, coming up with a different plan that could still achieve their goals

Red had a more talkative, confident, and charismatic personality than the other Tord clones

Great at controlling an army, and pretty decent with machines

But Red wasn't doing this for himself, he was doing this for Tord

He had an obsession with living up to Tords goal

Also a big Tord simp

Planning on the two of them leading the army together after Tord returned (he would even let Tord rule solo if he wanted)

After the events of "The End", it just left Red with a ruined plan, friendships broken, and Tords work and public image in shambles

In the future, Tord teams up with the boys to take Red down

Tord is the one to finish Red off

I have it so the au can go down two routes

Tord can either pretend to be Red so he can dismantle the army, or pick up where Red left off (pissing off his friends who he just got to trust him, especially after he told them that what Red was doing is what he was planing to do years ago)

[cloverexe777]

{When you flinch away from them}

Eddsworld: Tom,Paul,pat

———————————————————

Tom: 

You moved in with the boys after you left your abusive family you could say you have some trama under your belt 

he was in one of his fights with tord, he had stormed out of the room you were just come down stairs to get edd cause your Tv was 

messed up “oh hell-“ *pow* Tom punches a hole in the wall and turns to look at you the look in his eyes was a enough to make you flinch 

And a split second toms heart drop in when the Effects of panic hit him like a turk

“Love” you slowly backed away from him “ nonononon shit” he pulls you into a tight bear hug “ y-y/n I’m sorry I didn’t mean to” 

he whimpers you didn’t know what to say at this point all you could do was hug him back

Pat: 

You just got out of abusive relationship well over 3 months ago, but pat is everything you would in a man he’s so kind to you

And your trying your best to get back in the whole physical tunch thing, one morning you were in the kitchen making breakfast 

“ good morning love” pat said hugging you from behind you flinched away from him as a result poor pat looked like a confused 

Puppy 

“who did it” I was shocking to see pat go from his golden retriever Mood to a scarly calm but angry one

“P-pat” he kissed the top of your head “ don’t worry I’ll as tord to find out for me”

( I gave him a little yandere ending there oops😅)

Paul:

Paul was taking a break from some paperwork he was tord ordered him to do you where at your desk reading 

He had come in your office to see what you were up to “ hello my love” he said wrapping you in his arms 

He was confused when you jumped in his hold he pulled any from you to ask it you were ok but his heart broke 

Seeing you flinched away from him “Meine Liebe?” Panic was all he felt at that point all he could do was hold you

[pantakichi]

Tbatf is not so great

this post will probably recieve some backlash but I generally wanna hear some opinions on the TBATF fan comic because to be real with you all I don't like it. Don't come crying to me saying stuff like how can you be a true ew fan. I have my opinion. I checked it out not long ago because my friend told me about it. This post is kinda a rant but not really. My blog isn't for huge blocks of text and it's fir art and headcanons and generally a fight free blog.

The first problem is Tord. He us overally violent and his intentions are "taking over za wardou!" Boring. He has basically zero redeeming qualities and is just generally unlikeable and gets no sympathy or emotions from me which is not a well written antagonist. I'm not a Tord hater at all in fact I find him interesting but not this one. But the others aren't very good either. Edd is a major jerk who cares way too much about cola and doesn't give a damn about his friends and is way to nicey nicey to Tord who did unspeakable actions to his friends. Tom is meant to be a bit of a jerk but they cranked it up too much. The only character who didn't seem to have changed for the worse was matt.

There are several more problems which I think speak for themselves but I don't really want deep conversations on my blog but let's not all forget that questionable edd scene :( I know your probably gonna comment "but panta Tord is meant to be a antagonist." I know that but eddsworld portrays him in a much more healthy way and he still has more of a character in general.

Oops it did kinda become a rant sorry bout that.

Let's be honest I do not hate this comic I just wanted to give good criticism so they can make it better. You can like it I'm not gonna stop you but it you want to see fanart and headcanons for it sorry this blog will not provide that so feel free to keep scrolling.

I would generally do want to hear your thoughts whether I agree with em or not so feel free to reblog with your opinions.

[drunkonduty]

HIHI!! I saw that u liked rarepairs, so could u please draw 2trenchcoat, if ur fine with it ofc? They're like my fav rarepair ever lol

If you're going to do my request, please don't add horns to 2004 Tord (since he doesn't has any in the pic) and also please don't draw them as teenagers cuz that hc makes me uncomfortable ^_^ but it's oki if u wanna decline this bc of it!! I will totally understand :]

If ur not comfy with drawing them as ship, u can do them as friends/platonic too!! I really don't mind :]

Anyway, ur art is cool! Hope u have a nice day! (Or night idk)

yesyesyes!! I've seen ppl draw this pair and I've been dying to get this ask

Hope u like it (og sketch under the cut)

Ignore tom he's just jealous

[eddsworldrus]

I’m weak but I do have a reverse au of Wasteland au 

A very... very evil Matt who’s a hypnotizing vampire lord who’s inflicted a nuclear winter (and blotting out the nasttty sun)

And has almost everyone under his thrall 

A very meek edd at Matt’s beck and call

And a sparky tom who will go at tooth and nail to take down matt (oops love some sparky vamp hunter vibes)

I had a tord design but I’d rlly wanna redooo it based off my monster tord designs that came after this

[amberfossils]

👉👈 tord headcanons?

PICKING YOU UP AND THROWING YOU AROUND (as a greeting)

Here's my Tord headcanons/how he is in my idiot pea brain au (or just eddsworld but how I pretend it is tm), also it's a very long post oops. I might actually make a proper like timeline later but shrugs. Rather just put it somewhere first to get it outta my lil brain cavern

also when i say long i fucking MEAN long, okay? I fucking warned you

Generally he's pretty close with Matt, they're very open with one another and he goes to Matt for honest advice. Matt's not the greatest for book smarts but he's good for a lot of the things Tord struggles with (understanding complex emotions, coping mechanisms, how to go about certain things, how to process his trauma, if he should go to a therapist ((he should)), etc), so it works out pretty well. He's also just a rat bastard so they're best buds

He's more neutral towards Tom, he's not a big fan of him just due to them both tending to do things their own separate way and not being really interested in putting the effort into improving their relationship. They coexist, and sometimes they'll hang out, but it's usually something like watching a movie or a board game, nothing too grand.

He's also very close with Edd, but he's less open to really telling him secrets or looking to him for comfort- they're good friends, sure, but they're not exactly opening their hearts to eachother over coffee every morning. Edd takes them all on cool adventures and technically owns the house, and Tord follows along because they're interesting and he thinks Edd's pretty funny and being around those three doesn't get boring.

Tord is completely asexual but v sex-positive! He doesn't find anyone attractive per say but he still finds it enjoyable so he's fine w/ it as long as his partner understands that.

He's also aro and romantically indifferent. Like he finds some people romantically attractive, but he doesn't really care for labeling his relationships with people and he doesn't find that different labels make him happier, and personally prefers to call himself aromantic (not arospec or aspec or any other label under the umbrella, but specifically aromantic). He's specifically romantically attracted to masculine presenting people.

He goes by he/him if you ask him but he doesn't actually mind being called any other pronouns other than she/her. He literally doesn't have preferred pronouns, it's more just the ones people already use so he says em that way nobody gets confused. He doesn't say he has no pronouns though because he looks very, cishetallo and the last time he said he had no pronouns there was kind of a misunderstanding about whether he was making fun of them or not so he just SAYS he/him.

He's agender but he believes he's cis, and thinks that if he wasn't born a man he'd just sorta be whatever. If you asked him that "what gender would you be if your consciousness was put into a robot?" question he'd just be like "i would be a sick ass fucking robot who cares??" and he'd think that's what every cis person feels like

He's also blonde, his hair color changes in different eras because he dyes it.

He's also a big fan of techwear and cyberpunk clothing, but he tends to dress more average because it's too much effort for him to make a proper outfit just to go back inside in like 10 minutes. He over-thinks his outfits a lot so it's not really worth it to dress up all cool every single time he goes to the grocery store, and he's not a big fan of being confronted (although he's not afraid of confrontation, he thinks the comments are annoying and he's not usually in a good enough mood to deal with it).

He prefers black and red, and he can't wear white because he constantly stains his clothes.

Sometimes he does dress up, usually because Matt wants to make different outfits and wants opinions on them or because Matt said something would look good on him. He won't go out in any of the outfits on his own, but sometimes Matt convinces him to go out together n do stuff.

He genuinely enjoys tackling problems and finding solutions to things, as well as learning how things work (both as parts and as a whole), and he took up PC building as a hobby before working up to tinkering and inventing things himself. He also works as a vehicle mechanic :]

He's very anti-capitalism in general, but extremely strongly against capitalizing on disabilities. This, combined with his newfound skills in tinkering and engineering, leads him to start creating his own prosthetics. He starts off simpler before making them more and more complex and more and more functional, constantly working to challenge his skillset more and more and find new problems to solve.

After a while, he feels like his current job isn't challenging him enough and it's getting boring, so he decides to search for something that would properly use his newfound skills and beliefs. He wants to sell his prosthetics and inventions, but to do so and make enough profit would mean making them extremely expensive, which is what he's very much against.

At this point, he's already very against the current government that enables and encourages corruptness and greed, and like the undiagnosed mentally ill bitch who's never experienced true failure and constantly survived many, MANY near-death experiences, he's like fuck it! I can do better! I definitely won't fuck this up or get killed by the government lols

So anyway he goes to Edd and he's like Hey! I have this great idea! We should overthrow the government with sick fucking robots and take over the world!!

And Edd's like! That's the dumbest idea ever, Tord! Like actual batshit! Like I'm not even that stupid!

So Tord's like fuck! Okay! Mr. 'i can survive anything and nobody can tell me no or question my judgement when I throw out batshit ideas' says he doesn't wanna help! I'll just ask my old work pals Paul and Pat, who ALSO hate the government and capitalism, to start a revolution with me!

And uh they do. And it's going well with Paul and Pat's help, and I could talk about the actual relationships between them but not the point, basically Tord just makes big decisions and finds a cool bunker to make their main base and makes cool robots. But, his main mecha is in his workspace at Edd's house. He leaves and takes Paul and Pat with him to this new bunker he found, deciding he could come back for the mecha.

So their little army grows, and it's generally just referred to as "the red army" as a stupid joke before they get a real name. It sticks anyway though, because now their soldiers are referring to it as that and it'd be confusing to rebrand.

I'll go into more detail later, but basically Pat does a lot of the recruiting, whilst Paul uses some land he owns (inheritance) to have stores and restaurants and bars open to make money for the army.

As it continues, the army grows stronger, and eventually Tord feels like he's ready to actually start the takeover. He has spies implanted, plans made. So he decides it's time to get the mecha back.

He gets the mecha! Cool. But, Tom finds out about it, which we can't have- he can't have someone spoil his plans, so he attempts to kill him, or at least make him... Forget.

The issue with this is, well, he doesn't have the memory eraser gun. After it's initial failure, he decided to scrap it and use it for spare parts. So, fuck it, all aboard the let's kill Tom train!

Basically that gets fucked up because some monster Tom strength bullshittery I don't care enough to work out. Figure it out, Tom has the strength of god and he's just as tired. That's for later though

So, Tord thinks he's dead, realizes Edd and Matt also are here now, and he's like shit! Fuck! ass! curse words in various languages! and gets his shit blown up. And, btw, he is CONSTANTLY from then on confused as to why Tom survived the whole house falling on him and shit with barely a scar.

Too bad, he gets picked up by Pat and Paul and (shocker) they can't do the initial plan for the takeover if the mecha is broke as shit. Luckily enough for Tord, he knows about prosthetics! And he makes a fuckin WICKED arm. And, you know what? Why not throw in a sick helmet too? Listen, he's stuck out-of-service with nothing to do for a while, he made a super cool cyberpunk helmet.

He also learns about something going on in one of the towns that Paul has a bar in! There's stories of some sort of large monster roaming around at night, killing those who are out too late. Apparently housing is pretty cheap there though because of it. And in THIS housing market? Yeah, the monster practically has an infinite supply of food.

So, like anyone who thinks that they have bested god and that nothing on earth could ever kill them (listen surviving an actual explosion, zombie apocalypse, and multiple intruder/serial killers, and also not assassination attempts? kinda going to his already VERY inflated ego), he's like yeah!! I don't gotta remake the mecha from scratch- I can get my hands on this monster! this will not backfire!

He goes to the town and he's searching around breaking into places the monster has been and he's like shit, this just looks like an animal attack. He doesn't know shit about the local wildlife or anything like that, but he's also kind of sure that no animal around here or on earth would have claws big enough to leave those kinds of scratches around the place, so he's got his hopes up.

He also decides to stay the night at a hotel, and ends up trying to find the monster by going out late at night. He goes to Paul's bar, disappointed that he hadn't managed to tempt it out, and comes face to face with Tom, a bartender who's been working there for about... well, since the incident. Listen, housing prices were decent when they first moved in, and now with this whole monster thing (conveniently happening after the incident, when Tom and the other two first moved in)? Yeah settling down here was kind of an obvious choice for him.

Tom doesn't recognize him at first because personally me fucking neither, you come in where I work I am not looking at you I serve you you're gone to me. Do not care. Eventually though, he looks up and realizes who it is and basically completely freezes in shock. Thankfully/due to plot purposes it's like a fucking tuesday at 9 pm and nobody's there, so.

I'll go into more detail talking about Tom about his shifts and shit but whoopsies he's like half shifted and Tord's running out of room to run real fucking quick! So like any normal person, and I mean no normal person because Tord is anything but rational, he's like oh sick! you won't hurt me I'm your friend. anyways he's half right because sure, Tom doesn't KILL him, but only because he's only half shifted and surprised and listen he has work tonight and he wants tips and if he shreds his uniform he'll have to buy a new one. So, Tord just gets kicked out, and he calms down and shit.

Tord remakes his prosthetic and he's planning on using Tom (who is unaware of his plans and has not agreed to partake in this "new world order" thing) as the secret bioweapon to slaughter platoons of men. yippee!

Blah blah hurt comfort, Tom's angry and Tord's trying desperately to comfort him to attempt to apologize for his previous actions whilst also evaluating his own problems and dealing with them headfirst instead of just pretending like he's all mentally there and completely diving into his work though. Tom's taken back to the base in exchange for getting more understanding and control over his monster form and also cash, because he hates customer service and he especially hates customer service with drunk customers. He's not happy about it though.

Obviously, Matt's worried about Tom because he just kind of up and leaves and shocker, the monster goes with. And he's like "what the fuck why do all my best friends keep leaving now I'm stuck here with just Edd :/ plus I kinda liked tom he was chill" so he starts investigating into it, yadda yadda more I'll talk about when I infodump about me in this au/hc thingy

Basically Tom's coming along in the whole monster thing, he's basically god and Tord's very into the idea of having some eldritch monster on his team and Tom's very into the idea of sitting around and getting paid to fuck around so it's all good. Eventually though he has to tell Tom hey! btdubs the whole plan is to like use you as a superweapon and take over the world, sooooo. And Tom's not a big fan! And he's not too happy about working with Tord (again)!

Tord eventually wins him over with "but it'll be fucking sick thomas. cmonnnnn thomas, it'll be cooooooool!!! ur like some rad monster dude it'll be fine, you won't get hurt anyway so who gives a shit" and Tom's kind of desperate to do something memorable with his life and Tord telling him he'll be his right hand man and that he'll basically gain a place in history for being some fucked up monster gets him. So woooooo plan for world domination is a-go

Lots of shit happens but most importantly, now with the war and shit going on Matt's more worried and Edd's mad about cola and Matt, desperate to find a way to find Tom and make sure he's okay, is like shit! I'll join whichever side if they'll take me. And I mean come on. One of the sides has a sick fucking monster, okay?

So blah blah Matt's here! Tord's unaware of it, Matt's unaware of Tord, it's whatever. Tord just kinda exists doing paperwork and meetings and laws and making plans, rarely showing up to the front lines only to keep Tom in line.

Yada yada war, eventually he finds out about Matt and Matt's a bit upset but he knows where Tom is and oh, if he stays he can make sure he's safe and that everything's going well, and he's pretty sure Edd hasn't really given a shit that he left at all so yahoo into the army! He does less fighting and more supplies and planning out less important things Tord doesn't care about. Yada yada, Edd starts a revolution as Tord is winning and it's kind of a hell zone. And as far as Tom and Matt are concerned, he's kind of a piece of shit so him being on the opposite side is whatever. Eventually though he's starting shit and stealing from their army, including a time machine, and god fucking dammit, Edd.

They fucking drag his ass back to modern times and tell him to calm the fuck down and join them, because literally who cares, Edd. And Edd's a prick about it but he shuts up because he doesn't REALLY have much else of a choice

Tord tries to rekindle his friendship with the three whilst also tackling his issues regarding how he views relationships as expendable, how he's afraid of being powerless and feeling like he could do anything slowly turning into him spiraling in fear of not being a good enough leader and being unable to properly account for all of the issues going on under his reign and things aren't going very well! He also has a difficult time letting things be handled without him involved because he's terrified that his own army will be corrupted with greed and he has to stop it at it's roots and- basically he grows more and more paranoid every day that horrible things will happen and everyone around him is actually all in on a secret plan to kill him and shit due to past trauma which I'm just gonna:

-constantly put down and feels like his only option in life is to do what his parents want for him regardless of how he feels about his own life, from big things like his future career to who he spends time with to how he cuts his hair. They're extremely overbearing at the best of times, if not downright obsessive over his every movement and thought process, making him believe he is powerless in his own life and that if he doesn't do everything perfectly the first time it will all fall apart around him

-speaking of which, because of his previous lack of power he sees other people less as human beings and more like pawns for him to control, making him also overbearing towards other people and constantly needing control over them so they do not gain any control over him, meaning he also tends to put less effort or meaning into his relationships with other people

-as his army gets bigger there are a few key betrayals, including big things like assassination attempts (all of which have been thwarted by Tom before Tord was ever actually harmed) to little things like Tom being out of his quarters past curfew to have movie night with Matt without his permission. These all seem to dog-pile on him as he's terrified of every tiny speck of disloyalty or hint that maybe they're not completely under his control

Whilst this is all going down they repeatedly prove themselves to be loyal to him; Tom's come to like him more as a friend and is basically his bodyguard, Matt continues to be as affectionate and constantly checks up on his physical well-being and tries his best to suggest different things to help with whatever issues, and Edd continues on being a spy and consistently relaying accurate information and killing those that get in the way of the army.

That's about as far as I'm at storywise :) I uh. I don't think anybody read this far but shrugs

[mikeyddie]

Oops I think I might have accidentally sent something in unfinished! Idk if you got this but how about a love potion gone wrong. Edd is the poor victim thanks to Matt buying an unknown bottle from the magic store. Eduardo is the unfortunate recipient of Edd’s new found affections (fall in love at first sight.) This makes Eduardo freak out causing home to run and hide in his house while reader who dabbles in magic, tries to find a cure as the potion’s effects become more intense the longer it’s in effect . Meanwhile the rest of the boys are laughing at Eduardo trying to fight off Rival’s steadily increasing advances. Hope I didn’t give too much.

* Hii! So sorry this wasn’t out sooner, I kept forgetting about it lolz I love this ask so much, I super appreciate that you aren’t only asking for x reader stuff :skull (not that i mind it, i just yk like writing other stuff) Anyway I’d love to see art of it too! You don’t have to ofc but I love your art :D I’m gonna keep this in the AU, so it’ll take place b4 Tord moves, but after the confrontation in his room yk. So around where he just lets you sell the robot parts at this point, I mean come on look at how much money you’re making LMAO

Well anyway, here you go!

* Edd had been doing everything in the house recently and was pretty obviously overworked, so you and Matt had offered to run some errands for him, to which he was incredibly grateful. He wanted to oblige and keep taking care of things for you and the guys, but he couldn’t help but let you do so. You’d gotten Tom and Tord in on it, which took some effort, but they were cleaning the house. Well as far as you were aware, it wouldn’t surprise you if they stopped once you’d left the house. Regardless, it was time for grocery shopping. So, you and Matt headed to the shops. 

You’d nearly filled the cart, seeing as no one had gone shopping in a while. Two twelve packs of Cola for Edd, Smirnoff for Tom, and loads of food to fill the fridge. And, of course, you stopped in the mirror isle for Matt. He was ecstatic. 

“Oooh!! I look so good!” he pointed a finger gun at his reflection, causing you to chuckle. 

“Can I get them all?” Matt turned to you.

“Wh- no! That’ll cost all our savings combined, dude!” you exclaimed, placing your hand on your hip. The main reason was actually you just didn’t want to spend money on that many mirrors, lol.

You couldn’t help but smirk at the doofus in front of you. 

“Aww,” he frowned. 

He looked around for longer than you would have appreciated. 

“How about I check out all the food and load up the car?” You began. “I’ll wait outside for you,” 

Matt nodded happily and rested his hands in his pockets.

You strolled the cart to the self-check-out register and scanned all the items. The price didn’t rack up as high as expected, but it was still quite a lot. Thankfully, with the robot parts you had sold, you could afford it. You loaded up the bags and put them back in the cart, walking it out of the shop and to the car, dropped them in the trunk, and brought the cart back. You climbed into the driver’s seat and waiting for Matt. 

After a few minutes, he joined you with two mirrors in hand and you two were on your way back to the house.

“I found this weird liquid thing behind this mirror,” he began.

You glanced over at him for a moment, quickly looking back at the road.

“What is it?” you questioned. 

He shrugged, but realized you weren’t looking at him and hummed the “i don’t know” tune. 

You held your hand out as you rolled up to a red light. You turned your head to him and he gave you the small glass bottle. It was pink and had flower pettals in it. The bottle was in a teardrop shape, similar to a food coloring bottle, which you assumed it was.

“Looks like a love potion,” you joked.

“Oh yeah. I think I’ve seen something similar in a movie,” he sounded, taking it back and gesturing back to the light which had just changed to yellow.

You looked back to the road and pressed your foot down as it switched to green.

“Probably food coloring. Want pink toast tomorrow?” you asked, giggling. 

You were only half joking, wondering what it would taste like. It wasn’t the usual food coloring bottle, or you wouldn’t have had a second though. It had a corkscrew top and, you know, was glass over a squeezable plastic container. It was also much bigger, about the size of your hands palm. 

“Oooh! Yes indeed!” Matt spoke, loudly.

You laughed, turning onto their street and parking outside of Edds house. You opened the door, holding it in place with your foot as you pulled your phone out of your pocket, texting Tom to help take in the numerous bags from the shop. He said he’d be out in just a second and was finishing up the dishes. You smiled at the fact that you’d managed to convince Tom of all people to do the dishes. (You had to promise you’d buy him Smirnoff)

“Hey, Matt, you should probably run those inside before you grab any bags. Wouldn’t want to drop those mirrors,” you suggested.

He nodded and sped into the house, gently hanging the mirrors on his wall and shoving the so-called “food coloring” into his pocket.

Tom walked out, Matt now following. You three brought in all the groceries and put them away. You walked into the living room and leaned over the couch where Tord and Edd were sitting.

You glanced over at Tord. “I don’t want you guys bothering me at 2am because you don’t know how to cook,” you looked at Edd. “Or you’re too lazy. Because there are plenty of snacks now.” 

They shared a chuckle. 

“Hey (Reader)?” Edd looked up at you with joking puppy eyes.

You rolled yours.

“Yes?”

“Can you make me some toast?” he questioned. 

Your face dropped, causing him to laugh.

“Fine, fine. But you owe me,” you replied sarcastically, reentering the kitchen.

“Out, out,” you swatted your hand at Tom and Matt, causing the whole house to giggle.

You glanced around happily at the positive environment. Tom was smiling, even with Tord being in the house after all that had happened.

“Oh, (Reader),” Matt said, pulling his hand out of his pocket. “Here,” he placed the “food coloring” on the counter. 

You chuckled, moving it aside. You’d put it away later so Matt could have pink toast the next morning. You pulled the toaster out of a cabinet and plugged it in, grabbing bread from the fridge. You put it into the toaster and grabbed your phone, leaning against the counter. You scrolled through socials for a bit as you waited. Reading about some potion that had been discovered recently by some scientists. You scrolled past it, assuming it was some scheme for views, but who knows. It didn’t even say it was dangerous, so you didn’t pay it any mind. The toast popped up, catching your attention. You turned off your phone and put it in your pocket, grabbing the toast and ripped a paper towel from the roll. You placed the two on the counter and pulling forward the butter and taking a butter knife out of the silverware drawer. You began to spread it when Edd entered the kitchen.

“God, you take forever,” he joked, startling you.

You turned to him, letting out a breath. You elbow hit the glass container and the corkscrew fell out, the pink liquid spilled over the toast, soaking it. 

Edd reached over your shoulder to grab it. You turned to drop the knife in the sink and put away the butter. But before you could do that you noticed the tipped over bottle that previously was filled entirely of a light pink liquid and small flower petals.

You turned back to Edd to see the floppy bread in his hand.

“Oh-” he pulled it back from his mouth, his face contorting into an expression of utter disgust.

“How much butter did you put on this, jeez,” he dropped it on the paper towel and walked over to the sink and wash his hand. 

You exhaled. You had assumed it was food coloring, but the aroma slipping out of the small bottle in your hand quickly told you otherwise. It smelled like chemicals and Edd wouldn’t have been so appalled by the taste of food coloring. You didn’t panic, though light anxiety rose in your stomach, wondering if what Edd had just swallowed was even edible. You stared at it for a moment before tossing it.

“Sorry, dude.” You did the same with the toast and paper towel.

“It’s alright,” he glanced at the untouched stick of butter, immediately confused.

“Wait did you even put butter on that? The hell was on that??” his gaze shifted back to you.

“I- uh,” you gulped. You noticed the nearly empty glass of water on the counter and quickly gave it blame.

“I might have spilled water on it, I don’t know,” you lied. 

“Eh, I wasn’t that hungry,” he smirked.

“Wh- Dude!” he totally was just messing with you because you’d specified you didn’t want to be bothered.

You weren’t actually mad, of course, you found it kind of funny. But you lightly punched his arm. He did it back before walking back into the living room to continue watching TV with Tord.

Matt and Tom had gone back to their rooms. You decided to join the two on the couch. Dr. Why was playing and Edd and Tord were noticeably bored. Tord picked up the remote and switched through the channels. Nothing seemed interesting.

“Wanna take a walk or something?” you spoke up. 

Edd sighed.

“Yeah, sure,” the two sat up. 

You quickly joined them, headed to the door. You grabbed the key and opened it, waiting for the other two. They followed, closing the door behind them. Edd expression changed to the same one it had switched to earlier. He rubbed his eyes, clearly uncomfortable.

“Hey, are you alright?” you inquired, placing your hand on Edd’s shoulder.

Tord turned back to you two.

“Yeah- just a headache, sorry.” he massaged his temples, looking back up to see Eduardo.

He was walking up to the fence, about to begin some villain monologue- probably. Edd was greeted by the urge to growl said man’s name, but it came out a little differently.

“Hi, Eduardo!” he waved, smiling.

Tord and you were shocked by the reaction. Edd never hated Eduardo, but he didn’t like him enough to greet him kindly. All they ever did was fight.

“I-” Eduardo paused, staring at Edd for a moment.

“What?” Mark and Jon joined him.

“What’d he say?” Jon questioned, curious to know why Eduardo looked so confused. 

“How are you?” Edd rested his hands in his pockets, a light pink tint brushing his cheeks and the tips of his ears.

“What the f-” Tord began, interrupted by Eduardo.

“I- uh.. I’m fine...?” he glanced to the side. Not necessarily nervous, but definitely trying to figure out what was going on.

A reasonable assumption that crossed him was Edd was trying to win over his trust to easily strike on him. But he hadn’t really confronted Edd recently, so that would have been pretty random for someone who isn’t very violent. Another guess was something was wrong with the taller man’s head. Eduardo didn’t have time to ask before Edd continued talking.

“That’s good! Want to join us? We’re going on a walk,” he played with his hoodie string, seemingly nervous.

“The more the merrier,” he looked kind of shy.

“Edd, are you sure you’re okay?” you spoke, pretty concerned.

“Yeah, I’m good!” he giggled at your worried face.

He looked back at Eduardo, the shade of pink on his face burning slightly brighter.

“Don’t we like- hate each other?” Eduardo dropped his arms to his sides, moving past his classic villain pose.

“Do you hate me?” Edds face began to fall.

“Oh-! I’m.. not really?” Eduardo stressed to find the correct answer. 

He was pretty ready to leave the conversation but was honestly a little fascinated. He really wanted to know what was going on, assuming he’d need to listen to Edd to understand.

Edd lit back up.

“Well, come on!” he gestured at himself, you and Tord.

“Edd, I don’t think-” you started.

“I’m a little busy,” Eduardo backed up a bit.

Edd skipped closer to the fence, placing his hands on top of it. You hoped to God Edd didn’t catch feelings for Eduardo. You didn’t care if he was gay, but Eduardo??? Not just because of- well because it’s him, but also because you didn’t want to see the heartbreak. Eduardo had recently gone through a breakup according to what Matt told you Jon had said. And the previous partner was a woman. 

“Dude- did something happen?” Eduardo looked much more uncomfortable than concerned, but I mean could you blame him.

“Well, yeah.” Edd inched closer, smiling.

“I fell,” 

“Jeez, how hard did you hit your head?” Eduardo questioned, causing Mark to lightly chuckle.

You face-palmed, knowing exactly what Edd was about to say. Tord walked back inside the house, not really wanting to be apart of this.

“Hehe, not on the floor, silly,” Edd looked into Eduardos eyes.

“For you,” he let out quietly.

Eduardos eyes widened. He backed up quickly.

“Are you joking..?” Mark let out loud laughter, Jon was pretty confused.

“Edd- wtf??” you tried to pull him back to the house but he swatted your hand away.

“Why would I joke about that?” he inquired, the pink on his face deepening.

“jfc” you shook your head. Suddenly, you were hit with a realization. That liquid you spilled all over the toast earlier. The post you’d scrolled past about a potion. You did dabble in magic, and honestly love potions were hard to get right. You’d seen Edd with feelings for people before, and it wasn’t like this. He wasn’t this straight forward right away, and he wouldn’t mess with it if the other person was clearly uncomfortable. Holy shit, Edd is under a love potion.

Eduardo didn’t respond, quickly turning and running back into his house. The color had fallen from his face. Jon followed him curiously and Mark tried to catch his breath from the laughing. He walked back as well.

“Huh,” Edd backed up from the fence, assuming Eduardo was just shy or something. 

“Edd, we need to talk,” he glanced back at you.

“Okay,” 

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* I hope you liked it! I’m gonna make a part two, I just wanted to get this out because I felt bad about not doing so sooner. Lemme know if there’s anything specific you want to happen in the next part or if you have any criticism! I love your asks dude you come up with such cool ideas :DDD And don’t even worry about giving me too much to work with, go ham lmao- the more detail the easier it is to write the in-betweens- anyway see ya ^^