#or nct ships at all anymore

[misswoozi]

Taeyong would never top, however he will power bottom when hes really stressed and he absolutely goes to Doyoung for this 🎮

THIS IS A VERY INTERESTING RESPONSE, OP

[anashins]

i love your idol!au so much 🥰🥰 that’s why i’ve come up with an idea where in idol!reader suddenly gets shipped with another idol/actor she worked with and jaehyun get jealous and tries so hard to drop hints here and there that they’re together so people can ship them instead lol

Pairing: idol!Jaehyun x idol!reader

Genre: fluff

Word Count: 1k

Summary: When an incident during your first collaboration stage leads you to get shipped with his group's leader, Jaehyun decides that he has to nip this rumor in the bud.

A/N: Thank you so much, I hope you like this one 💗

“Did you see me, Jaehyun? It was amazing!”

You had just gotten off the stage, still in your outfit in which you had performed alongside Taeyong and several other SM artists for a collaboration song, and still in high spirits with the adrenaline pumping through your veins.

You had been preparing for your first stage outside of your girl group for weeks, and the first live performance was a full success despite minor technical issues that luckily got quickly resolved thanks to the other artists in the unit.

Jaehyun was lurking backstage, having to wait another few stages until NCT would get their chance to perform, and even though he must be pumped as well by now, he didn’t give off the impression to be actually excited for the concert today anymore despite him having expressed his anticipation before.

In fact, he looked enormously pissed. 

“What was going on with your microphone?” he barked, walking toward you. “Why was yours the only one not working?”

“It’s okay!” you tried to calm him down. “It worked shortly after, right? I didn’t even have to sing first until they noticed, so it’s okay, it can happen!”

“But not during your first collaboration stage! I’m gonna find the one responsible for this.”

You didn’t know what was up with him, Jaehyun looked utterly angry, almost beyond the point of no return. You had never witnessed him turning into such a borderline menace for everyone around him. Usually, your boyfriend was kind, warm and reserved. Only seldomly, he expressed upset over something, most likely only brooding, and even more seldomly, he raised his voice. So what was going on with him now?

“Hey.” Before Jaehyun got the chance to turn around and stomp away, you grabbed him by his arm and held him back. “I promise you, it’s alright! There is no point in going off on that person, we cannot turn back time. Taeyong noticed it right away and fixed it, didn’t you see? Next stage, I’m gonna have a double check beforehand.”

“Of course he noticed it and fixed it right away,” he repeated, and you didn’t miss the slight mockery in his voice as it dawned on you what was really going on behind his boiling surface. “He always does.”

“Jaehyun…” Your hand slid down his arm until you reached his clenched palm and gently wrapped your fingers around his in a comforting and reassuring gesture. “Are you jealous? Of Taeyong? One of your best friends?”

It took him a while to reply and eventually admit to his feelings that he had never shown you before as he slowly shifted around to face you with defeated features. “It’s not that. He’s a great leader and a professional, which was why he noticed the malfunction right away and was able to fix it.”

“See, he’s the one who saved me from an embarrassing moment. So, what’s your problem?”

“My problem is…” You could almost hear Jaehyun grinding his teeth together. “...the internet. You have probably not seen it yet, but it’s full of people shipping you with Taeyong, and it’s making me mad!”

You frowned in confusion. “Why would they do that?”

“Apparently, it was heroic and utterly cute how he immediately went over to you and helped you, touched your face while fixing the microphone, and how you looked at him gratefully, earning a bright smile back.”

“I was only grateful for his help, and you know Taeyong, he-”

“I know,” Jaehyun sighed deeply. “I know.” He cupped your face, all anger suddenly gone, wiped away and replaced by something you had never encountered in his expression before as well: insecurity. “If it were me, I would have done the same, you know that, right? I’m capable of that too.”

“I’m sure about that. Please don’t listen to the internet and who they want to see me with, because they have only witnessed one interaction. I barely interact with other male artists. If they saw us close together as well, their opinions would surely change.”

“Okay.” Jaehyun's shoulders relaxed and he now appeared less tense, wiping a strand of your hair that had gotten loose out of your face. “I’m sorry about that.”

You giggled quietly. “Jeong Jaehyun, I didn’t know you could be this jealous.” 

____

Having changed into the concert’s official shirt, you went to the goodbye stage with all the artists that had performed today. You were supposed to get on the same cart as your group’s leader, waving goodbye to the audience, but when you arrived at the spot, someone else already waited there.

“Where is my leader?” you asked, tilting your head.

“I switched carts with her,” Jaehyun explained with a cheeky smile.

“Oh, you did?” You approached him slowly. “And she allowed you to do so just like that?”

“Well, I owe her one bucket of chicken every week for one month straight, but it will be worth it.”

“You know you never had something to be jealous of in the first place, right?” you wanted to assure him.

“I’m very well aware of that. But I cannot let everyone believe you and Taeyong would make a greater couple than us. My ego just won’t let me.”

“What are you planning on doing then, Jaehyun? We cannot be too obvious.”

“Get on this cart.”

In your heels, it was a bit tricky to get up the steep stairs, and that was when you felt Jaehyun’s hand on your forearm. A tender touch that only lasted one second or two, but was obvious enough to get noticed by the endless cameras in the audience.

He hadn’t chosen to support you by your waist, because that would have been too intimate to be shared between artists from the same label, and he hadn’t chosen your hand either, because it would have been too obvious how close you actually were.

Jaehyun had done the right gentlemanly thing to spur some fan content that was just in character for him.

“Sneaky,” you whispered to him when he followed you to the top of the cart.

“I know,” he answered, smiling the brightest for the entire ride, waving to the crowd.

[fullsunised]

NCT DREAM REACTION: CHAPTER FOUR

╰─▸ ❝ @ nct dream x idol! reader

→ when you get shipped with each other- massive crushes on each other

→ requests: open

→ trigger warnings: none?

→ a/n: BRO IM SO FUCKING STUPID- I WAS MEANT TO SAVE THIS AS A DRAFT BUT INSTEAD I POSTED IT WITH THE REQUEST THING, HALF DONE- BRO IM GONNA GO UNALIVE MYSELF HOW AM I GONNA LIVE LIKE THIS STOP ANW- HOPE THE PERSON THAT REQUESTED THIS FINDS IT. THANK YOU FOR THE LOVE</3 I LOVE YOU MORE ☺️

ready to love

MARK LEE

boy's shy asf. he had a crush on you- that was painfully obvious and when your fans point it out, he's shy asf. after he finds you two trending on twitter, bros red asf first.

after that he's gonna send you a message asking if you were uncomfortable with all this- because he cares, he doesn't and would never want to put you in an awkward position. when you tell him how you find this cute, he'd be elated bro.

you know he's making and discussing with his members on how to ask you out fr. 

RENJUN HUANG

he's gonna pretend like it doesn't affect him. like 'yeah, we get shipped together so what' types. he likes you of course, but his whole personality is about being cool- so he is cool. 

that is until you send a post you came across about how he looks at you while your talking, and boy is he embarrassed. he's gonna play it off cause it's text but when you see him again the next day for a shoot, he'd be too shy to meet eyes.

he wouldn't ask you out instantly because he wants to make sure, you knew each other better before moving to the next step.

JENO LEE

confused. what did he do that his fans are shipping you two? but he enjoys it for sure. like come on, the way he looks at you, bro like you're the only person that matters to him. you're fans definetly caught on that.

he'd be funny about it. well, not like make jokes about it but take it with a pinch of salt. you two would be sharing moments captured by your fans, and tease each other about it for long until-

he actually becomes serious and asks you out.

HAECHAN LEE

it isn't haechan if he doesn't tease you. boy is gonna scroll through to all the 3 million tweets to find the one tweet where you are the one simping for him and not the other way around. calls you adorable, ruffles your hair and all that just to make fun of you, and to give your fans more to write about.

but when you send back all the other tweets where he is literally staring at you with heart eyes, boy's is gonna be shy. he's gonna start acting defensive and shit. you'd find it so adorable that you'd tease him too.

after a few months of frequent teasing, you'll finally ask him out cause he was taking ages. even though he finds it hot, he whines because he wanted to be the one to ask you out.

JAEMIN NA

man he's smiling. like always, while looking at you, while hearing you speak, while scrolling through all the tweets, while watching your moments on youtube. he's just so lovestruck it's concerning. 

after he sees how much your fans support you two, he won't hide his crush anymore. bro will randomly hug you, set your hair for you, click pictures- all the boyfriend material stuff without even being your boyfriend. 

it would take him not long to ask you out, and from them you two would be gracing the world with your presence as a couple.

CHENLE ZHONG

shy- nah maybe cocky. as soon as he notices how your fans have been screaming for the both of you, he's smiling. he'll make more moments for you two cause he can.

because your fans enjoy you two together- he'd frequently take you out to eat, your crush him would grow stronger during these times- not because he's treating you but because you enjoy his presence.

you two appearing on each other's lives would be so frequent that your fans are sure you're dating. he asks you out and yeah the rest is calm.

JISUNG PARK

boy's blushing so much. you are done shooting and go home when he notices the hashtag on twitter. smiling, and blushing cause he loves it but is shy too.

the next time he sees you again, he won't be able to maintain eye contact because he's too flustered to look at you. when you're not looking though, he'd steal glances.

when it comes to asking you out, his members have to reassure him that you feel the same- and after hours and hours of convincing boy will confess.

fullsunised.

[omikki]

Back when I was really into nct like 2018/2019 (I still am but only the music) I wanted to write a fic so badly about Kun, Renjun and Chele being brother moving to a new school/city and having to work shit out.

Kun would obviously be the older one since their parents weren't here, getting any job he can for money and being really anti social when his co workers wanted to hang out because his brothers were his priority.

Renjun being the middle/oldest at school, he has anger issues with how kun just moved them after their parents, but after being forced to do extra curriculars he has some friends and isn't so angry anymore

Chele the baby doesn't remember much of their parents at all and actually welcomes the new school environment, so much so that he comes off a bit strong to the other kids in his class.

And ofc ships would happen to, old me focused on the ship of norenmin but idk

What do you guys think, would you still want to read this?

[misunhye]

what are misun’s fans like?

oh my goodness i love this question um

so misun’s subfandom name is dalbits ! which means moonlight. nctzens’ way of thinking goes like this : misun = sunlight. she is their sun, they are her moon. them = moonlight. so yes!

misun feeds into their delusionals like crazy. they’re as delusional as each other. it’s because of this that she has some of the worst fans of all time, it’s because of this that she has so many incidents with sasaengs. and she is constantly blamed for that unfortunately:(

they are first and foremost, misun stans, humans second. they have been through some shit when defending misun from antis, and are insane— don’t talk shit about her, or they will somehow find out your address and d*xx you. yeah. they’re crazy and even crazier about her. 99% of the time, a dalbit is at the center of the crime when there are arguments on stan twt 💀

if, for some reason, she ever gets kicked out nct, they’d riot. they constantly send trucks to SM for better treatment for her, especially whenever knetz are harder on her than usual. so just imagine.

they’re all mostly boyfriend/girlfriend stans but they also hate whenever someone ships her with someone romantically. they’re jealous 24/7 and the male fans in korea, especially, are possessive and obsessive over her. they kind of scare her, sometimes, actually. they also don’t really like when people sexualize her, because well, she always been sexualized ever since debut. but there are definitely people who don’t really care anymore when she does it out of her free will because she seems to really like doing sexy/sensual dances.

a large portion of male dalbits are older than her, but there are definitely more younger fans nowadays. for female fans, they’re around the same age. she has more male fans than female fans, but that’s really what SM was counting on when she debuted.

you can see her fansites here, and here are some well known intl stan twt accounts for her:

no im not doing full profiles who cares

[mymoodwriting]

Beyond The Stars

F!Reader x EXO

Genre: Amnesia AU, EXO Universe/Planet

Warning: Amnesia, Manipulation, Lies, Interdimensional Travel, Betrayal

Words: 4.8K

Chapter Seventeen

(Prev//Next)

Prompt: You’re the most important thing to EXO, you’ve been with them for years, and when you wind up missing, it greatly upsets them. Their journey to find you and bring you home starts a chain of events that leads to facing their own greatest fears, making unlikely allies, traveling to other worlds again and finally gathering the strength to take down their greatest enemy. Along the way you get to see their true colors and fall in love all over again, although you might come to realize you don’t like what you see in the mirror.

@suhappysuho @starillusion13

“Destiny? What do you mean?”

“This is a safe haven.” Suho explained. “I’ll show you, but you all have to be calm.”

“You’re not exactly making me feel any better here.” Taeyong commented.

“Just follow me.”

Others were hesitant to follow, but they did so. Lay took your hand and led you along with the group. You looked around, realizing this was some kind of ship, and that brought up so many more questions. At least now it made sense what Suho had said earlier, the ship’s name was Destiny. You came to some steps, although Suho told everyone to give him a moment and went up.

“Captain!”

From below you heard some happy cheers, followed by running. Soon enough you saw someone with Suho and then they noticed you.

“Wow… that’s a lot of stowaways.”

“It’s a long story, but the new faces won’t be staying. They just needed a safe place to stop, hope you don’t mind.”

“Not at all. You wouldn’t bring enemies on my ship. Welcome aboard everyone.”

You went up onto the main deck, taking in your surroundings again and being amazed. You weren’t out on the ocean where you would find such a ship, but sailing through the sky. You ran over to the edge to look overboard.

“This is amazing.”

“Careful now, don’t want to lose anyone.”

Xiumin came over and pulled you back, reminding you to behave yourself. You apologized and promised to stay close. You were brought over back to the crowd and over to the gentleman you had seen talking with Suho before.

“We should probably introduce you. Y/n, this is the captain of the ship.”

“It’s nice to meet you.”

“The pleasure is all mine.” The gentleman bowed. “I’m Hongjoong, captain of the Ateez crew, and this is our lovely ship Destiny.”

“It’s wonderful.”

You got to meet the rest of the crew as well and struck up a conversation as the leaders stepped away to talk among themselves.

“I’m Taeyong, leader of NCT. Thanks for allowing us to remain on your ship.”

“A friend of Suho’s is a friend of mine.”

“I want to ask though… how did you meet Suho?”

“He helped us long ago to save our world, and thanks to them we now roam free, always ready to help others. Destiny is our safe place, and for you as well. You’re always welcomed on my ship.”

“Thank you for your hospitality. I hope we cross paths again under better circumstances.”

“I’m sure we will.”

“Do you think you and your people are good to travel?” Suho asked. “Or do you need to rest. I’m sure-”

“No, no, we’re alright.” Taeyong assured. “We should return home and fully rest.”

“Okay then.”

You all gathered to see the Neos off, and you hoped to see them again some time in the future. With the third party gone there was a shift in the atmosphere. 

“So what really brought you by?” Hongjoong asked. “You are not one to show up unannounced.” 

“I’m here to collect on the favor we’ve asked of you.”

“Ah, I see.”

“Wait.” You asked. “What favor?”

You didn’t answer, but a look was exchanged between Hongjoong and Wooyoung. The other boy went off to the captain’s quarters and returned with an hourglass moments later.

“What is that? It looks so cool.”

“It’s called the Cromer.” Wooyoung explained, handing it over to you. “We don’t use it as much anymore, but it serves another purpose now.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ll see.”

You only pondered on that for a moment before the Cromer floated up into the air and away from you. DO had stepped away from the group, and the Cromer flew over to him. In the blink of an eye the hourglass had shattered, but all the pieces remained in the air. All the glass was separated and you could tell DO was focused on it. One moment there was glass and then it turned to sand. You had no idea what was going on, let alone as Kai stepped forward and allowed the sand to pour down onto his hand.

“What are you doing…” You mumbled. 

“Remembering something long forgotten.”

“Why are you going there?” Hongjoong asked.

“We can’t keep running.” Suho stated. “We have to face our enemies head on.”

“What does that mean?” You questioned.

“You’ll find out soon enough.” Chen assured. “Promise.”

“Kai?” Suho said.

“I got it.”

You didn’t know what that meant, but you watched as DO put the Cromer back together as if nothing had ever happened. It returned to your hands and you looked it over in awe.

“You could stay a while.” Hongjoong suggested. “Get some rest and prepare.”

“Can’t keep pushing things off.” Lay said. “But thank you.”

“If you guys need any help, you know where to find us.”

It was sad to be saying goodbye to new friends so soon, but you went wherever EXO went without hesitation. You hoped to see them again and get to know them more when the time comes. You gave the Cromer back to Yeosang, and they all wished you well. Sehun and Chanyeol took your hands, and you all said one last goodbye before you closed your eyes, ready for the next adventure. The quiet and calm of the open sky faded into the sounds of nature, and you opened your eyes to find yourself surrounded by trees.

“Woah… where are we…”

“Some place we never thought we’d return to.” Baekhyun mumbled. “Come on, we have some place to go.”

“You guys really need to stop being so cryptic.”

“I know, sorry. We’re still processing everything too.”

You followed the boys through the words, quite intrigued by the fact they knew exactly where they were going. After a while you came to this cabin. It seemed abandoned with nature having taken it back, but it all retreated as Lay waved his hand. You went with the boys inside, seeing all the dust that’s been collecting. Sehun was quick to blow that all away, but a silent stillness remained.

“So… what is this place?”

“An old home.” Xiumin said.

“Are we staying?”

“For the foreseeable future, yes.”

“Then we should start cleaning up.”

Your bright spirit was a bit of a contrast with the rest of the atmosphere, but the others agreed with you. The others helped you clean up, making this place feel more like a home. While cleaning you found an interesting picture. It was a group photo of the boys with a handful of unfamiliar faces. There was something strange about this whole place you couldn’t quite put your finger on, and this picture added to that uneasiness. Before you could dwell on it more you heard Lay calling out to you, and you made your way to the back of the cabin, finding a greenhouse. You stepped into a garden you had never seen before, amazed by its beauty.

“Wow…”

“This is an old garden of mine, and you can see the plants have taken very good care of each other.”

“They must have missed you.”

“I missed them too.”

“What happened here? I saw a picture of you and some other people. Was this home before you met me?”

“For a long time it was, but we had to flee.”

“So why are you back now?”

“Cause we need to fix things.”

“Fix things?” You thought for a moment. “Is RF the reason you left this world?”

“Yes. This place was home, and then we wound up being held captive. When we escaped, we left this world in their hands. We have to correct that mistake.”

“That’s dangerous… facing RF head on… especially if the two of you have history here.” “I know, but it has to be done. For starters we need to check in with old friends.”

“Old friends?”

“You can meet them later.” Kai said as he entered the garden. “We have to find them first.”

“And how are you gonna do that?”

“A lot of remembering.”

Kai stepped forward, going into the garden and sitting himself down. Some vines crept over, wrapping around his arms and waist. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, making you wonder what he was doing. You had never seen Kai in the garden like this before.

“Are you picking anything up?”

“I can sense them… but it’s faint…”

“It’s been years at this point. Will that be enough or should I look for them?”

“No. This should be enough.”

After a while longer Kai opened his eyes, the vines moving away and releasing him. He gave you a big smile and came over to press a kiss to your cheek.

“Suho, Sehun, and I will be going out for a bit. We’ll be back as soon as we can.”

“What? Can’t I go?”

“This place is unknown, and it’s best if you stay here where it’s safe.”

“Then why not bring our house here?”

“We don’t want to draw attention to ourselves. Besides this place was the blueprint of the home we have now. Stay and be good.”

“Alright… don’t be gone too long.”

“Hopefully we won’t.”

The trio went off, and you focused on making this old place feel new. Kai scouted ahead first to make sure no one would get hurt and that they could lay low. Alleys always worked in their favor.

“Where are we?” Sehun asked.

“No idea.” Kai admitted. “Since the frequency is so faint I can’t get an exact location, but they have to be around here somewhere.”

“So like a needle in a haystack.”

“At least I narrowed down the search, didn’t I?”

“Don’t fight.” Suho reminded. “We have no idea what they’re like anymore after all this time. We might not be welcomed. Just lay low and don’t draw attention.”

The area they were in wasn’t that popular, but there were still plenty of people around going about their day. They seamlessly blended in, walking down the street and looking around. Nothing much had seemed to change about the world, but that wasn’t entirely a good thing. While walking Sehun had gotten a strange feeling, stopping before a building.

“Sehun?”

“There’s something about this place.”

“What place? A dojo?”

“I can’t explain it.”

“Wouldn’t hurt to give it a try.”

The three went inside, seeing that the place was empty, except for one gentleman. They were cleaning the weapons rack. They began their welcome speech and turned around, only to cut themselves short.

“Suho… Kai… Sehun… is that really you?”

“Surprised to see us. Shownu?”

“I thought I’d never see you again.”

Shownu ran over to embrace the three in a hug, still processing that they were really there. So much had happened since they last spoke. There was a lot to catch up on, but something else was more important.

“What are you doing here? I didn’t think you’d return.”

“We have to right our wrongs.” Suho explained. “We’re sorry we took so long.”

“It’s just incredible to see you now.”

“What about the others?” Kai asked. “How are they?”

“I’m not so sure. We don’t keep in touch. It was better if we remained separate. Although for a while I was in contact with Wonho, but he hasn’t been around in months. I’m worried something happened to him but I have no way of finding out.”

“That’s alright. We plan to reunite everyone. If you don’t have any pressing business, we could go now.”

“Absolutely. It’d be so good to see everyone’s face again.”

Once again Kai relied on a faded feeling, going ahead to make sure everything was safe before returning for the others. Shownu did need a moment to recover from the nauseating feeling of teleportation before they could continue. It was another small town, but nothing vastly unfamiliar to Shownu. Neither of them knew where to look so it was back to walking the streets. Although this time around they had someone with a slightly better eye than them.

“Have you been avoiding me?”

“Huh… Shownu!”

Wonho ran over to hug his hyung, embracing them tightly with disbelief clear on his face. This seemed like a dream, more so when he realized his friend was not alone.

“You… is it really you?”

“Long time no see, right?”

“I can’t believe this.” Wonho stated. “What’s going on?”

“We’ll explain later, right now we’re just trying to find everyone.” Suho said. “Did you keep in touch with anyone?”

“No. Only Shownu, but that didn’t last long.”

“How did you find me anyway?”

“It’s a bit complicated… I received a watch in the mail with some instructions and a location… I was hesitant to use it but when I did, I found my way to you.”

“That must be what I sensed.” Sehun said. “The energy from you traveling back and forth. Without it we might not have found Shownu so easily.”

“I’m glad I could help.” Wonho teased. “So who are we looking for next?”

“No idea.” Suho admitted. “We’re just going to the nearest signal.”

“Got it. Ready when you are.”

“You’re very eager.”

“It’s been a long time.”

“I know.”

The five of them made the journey to their next location. Another town, and another needle in a haystack. Still, the more of them they found, the better they all felt. This time around everyone was surprised to find Minhyuk with Changkyun in a cafe. The reunion there was far bigger than the last.

“Have you two been in touch this whole time?” Wonho asked.

“Not consistently.” Minhyuk admitted. “Changkyun would stop by once in a while to check up on me, nothing more.”

“I have incredible timing don’t you think?” Changkyun teased. “I’m so happy to see you all, but also surprised.”

“When we get back to the cabin we can talk.”

“That place is still standing? I would have thought for sure RF would have destroyed it or something.”

“They’d never be able to get close.”

It was great to see each other, but they still had others to find. With the next jump some had gotten used to the nausea, and others not so much.

“Gosh, that always feels weird.” Changkyun commented. “So, who’s here?”

“We don’t know.” Kai said. “Just following a feeling.”

The group walked around for a while. They weren’t sure who to be looking for but once again Sehun had a strange feeling. He led the group inside a building, finding Jooheon behind a glass in the middle of work.

“Jooheon.”

“Hm?” The boy got up. “You… oh my gosh.”

Jooheon rushed out to embrace his brothers, tears stinging his eyes. Suho and the others let them have their reunion, aware they hadn’t seen much of each other in a long time too.

“What’s the reason behind all this?” Jooheon asked. “I thought we’d never see each other again.”

“It’s a long story.” Kai said. “But we’ll get to it. We just need to find the others first.”

“About that…”

“What?”

“I… I wish I could have told you all this sooner… but Kihyun… he was in a car accident…  he’s…”

“I’m so sorry.” Suho mentioned. 

The news took everyone by surprise, although Sehun had been looking around. Once again he felt something was off, except it was different this time around. He stepped away from the group, and Kai noticed, following him.

“Sehun, what is it?”

“I’m not sure… but I feel like someone else is here…”

“Someone else?”

Kai wasn’t sure what Sehun meant, but he had his own way of figuring things out. He closed his eyes and took a moment, then disappeared. Moments later he returned and threw someone to the ground. This person had a visor covering their eyes like some VR headset, and seemed to be wearing some kind of armor.  The others had noticed this as well.

“What the heck?”

“This person’s been spying on us. Any ideas?”

“RF let us go.” Minhyuk said. 

“That doesn’t mean they wouldn’t keep an eye on you.”

“They weren’t following us.” Sehun added. “So they must have been here keeping an eye on Jooheon.”

“Me?”

That’s when the spy decided to move, making an attempt to run but Kai was quick to follow. The two engaged in some quick combat. This person was skilled, but Kai’s powers gave him an advantage. He managed to land a hard kick to the face, causing the other to slam to the ground. There was the audible crack of the visor and then all movement ceased. Shownu and Suho flipped over the spy, realizing a familiar face was under the mask.

“Kihyun…”

Everyone was confused and shocked. The news they had just been told suddenly became a lie, and this brought up so many questions. They all agreed that they couldn’t stay here for much longer so Suho made the call to go back home, taking everyone with them.

“Clear the table.”

Shownu called out orders as he carried Kihyun inside, Jooheon quickly wiped everything off the nearest table. Everyone gathered around as Kihyun was laid out on the table, helping to get the gear off of him. Others that had heard the commotion came to see what was going on, although there were no time for greetings. Things were taken off Kihyun to make him more comfortable, but the visor wouldn’t come off. 

“So…” Minhyuck spoke. “How do we get that off him? Seems attached to his face and I don’t wanna… what if I hurt him?”

“You won’t.”

Another voice caught everyone’s attention. They all looked over at the door, seeing a tall figure hidden under an umbrella walk in. Once the group had gotten to the old house Suho made it rain to cover their tracks and it was pretty bad outside. This person seemed pretty clean, barely a drop of water on their umbrella, and not a speck of mud on them despite the surrounding woods. The umbrella was lowered, Hyungwon revealing his face.

“There’s a button on the left side of the visor. Press it and it will come off without issue.”

No one moved but Minhyuck, feeling around and finding the button. When he got the visor off he tossed it to Chen. Kihyun didn’t react, the other boy starting to shake him.

“Kihyun… Kihyun, wake up.”

“He won’t.” Hyungwon said. “And I suggest you don’t fry the visor.”

“What do you mean he won’t wak-” Shownu said but was cut off.

“It was supposed to be me!” 

Jooheon yelled, storming over to Hyungwon. The older boy didn’t move, not at all afraid of the other. It was clear Jooheon wanted to fight, but Wonho was quick to run over and step in front of Hyungwon, holding his arm out. Shownu and Changkyun had moved as well, grabbing Jooheon and pulling him back despite his protests.

“It was supposed to be me!”

“Jooheon, what are you talking about?” Changkyun asked. “You’re not making any sense.”

“I was supposed to be in the accident! Not Kihyun! I saw you there, Hyungwon, I saw you there at the crash site!”

“What?” Shownu’s grip got tighter. “Jooheon, stop this and explain yourself.”

Jooheon kept glaring at Hyungwon, wanting to punch him, but he stopped fighting when Shownu asked. The two holding him waited a moment, making sure he was calm before letting him go. Wonho stayed with Hyungwon, but wasn’t sure what was going on.

“I’ve always felt that something was off about the accident.” Jooheon began. “I’ve had dreams of it, where I’m the one in the driver’s seat, it felt so real, too real, to just be a dream. I remember seeing you there when the ambulance took Kihyun, and then you disappeared. It was supposed to be me right? You changed that somehow. Why? It should be me on that table!”

“I couldn’t let RF get to you, I’m sorry.”

“Wait, you’re saying that Jooheon’s dreams are real?” Minhyuk asked.

“Those aren’t dreams, but memories of another timeline. I’m surprised you retain fragments of the accident.”

“So this…” Changkyun was mumbling. “This was what you needed to change?”

“What?” Shownu questioned. “What are you talking about?”

“Hyungwon came to me once, long before the accident, he asked me for a favor, said it was important. He needed to change something in the timeline, told me when and where Minhyuck would be, asked me to look after him, keep him safe for as long as possible.”

“Wait, you’ve been in contact with Hyungwon this whole time?”

“Yes… yes, I have.”

“So, that’s how you found me? I found that watch, a customer left it. I was just messing with it, I didn’t know it…” Minhyuk trailed off as he came to a realization, looking at Hyungwon. “You left that for me! You wanted me to use it!”

“Yes. It’s why I left one at Wonho’s place too.”

“It was you? You… you set us up?” Wonho seemed hurt. “Why? WHY!?”

“I needed a distraction. You’re all on RF’s radar, if you were found to be time traveling they’d focus on you since you were messing with the timeline.”

“You gave one to Kihyun too!” Jooheon questioned. “Didn’t you! You knew he would feel guilty over what happened and would want to change it! Why didn’t you just stop the accident!”

“You don’t think I tried to stop it, despite knowing better. There are things that are fated to happen, that accident was one of them. It was going to happen, one way or the other, if not at that moment, then later. Every attempt I made to change it ended the same, Jooheon was severely hurt and taken by RF. I couldn’t stop it, but I could change who was taken.”

“Why! WHY!”

“What did you do?” Changkyun growled. “Kihyun didn’t just get into the driver’s seat…”

“I did what I just did here. I showed him the truth, the accident can’t be stopped, and I gave him the opportunity to save Jooheon.”

“No you manipulated him!” Jooheon spat. “I see no reason why it shouldn’t be me on the table.”

“It’s because of me.” Lay spoke up. “Isn’t?”

“Yes.” Hyungwon nodded. “I’m sorry.”

“Wait, what? What does Lay have to do with this.”

“Everything.” Xiumin added. “Jooheon, you know more about Lay’s plants than any of your friends. If RF got to you, they would learn that and… well I suppose Hyungwon knows what the outcome of that is.”

“You’re seriously defending him? He’s the one who betrayed us, who turned Baekhyun in, when you asked us to look after him.”

“We did.” Sehun got up. “But not Tao, right Hyungwon?”

“Yes. Tao asked me to bring Baekhyun in, he knew it wouldn’t end well if he was kept from the group any longer. I’m sorry.”

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Shownu asked.

“Cause he told me not to.”

“So you just betrayed us?” Wonho said. “You picked him over us?”

“That’s not it.”

“That’s exactly what you did!” Minhyuk yelled. “You betrayed us! And stayed with RF when they gave us an out!”

“He made a promise.” Kai added. “Isn’t that right? Tao could see the future if he focused with Luhan at his side. He knew what would happen if Baekhyun stayed away from us. He knew what would happen to him, to the others, and that we’d escape, but he knew we’d be back too. So, he needed someone to look after this world in our absence.”

“Yes.” Hyungwon admitted. “I made a promise, and that meant gaining RF’s trust, even if it meant losing you guys. I’m-”

“Don’t.” Wonho interrupted. “I don’t want to hear it, just wake Kihyun up and go.”

“I… I can’t… he’s comatose.”

“What!”

“The visor… it controls him, he’s lifeless without it.”

“So that’s what my fate was.” Jooheon said. “Comatose.”

“No… no it wasn’t. Messing with the timeline has a price, even when you find a loophole.”

“You… you killed him!” Changkyun shouted. “You killed Kihyun!”

“I’m sorry.”

Changkyun charged at Hyungwon, but he disappeared before he was grabbed. The boy fell to his knees distraught. He felt partially guilty for having helped Hyungwon in his plan, not knowing what the outcome would be. Shownu went over to comfort him, Wonho screaming as well and punching the wall. Minhyuk had fallen to his knees as well, holding Kihyun’s hand, his own silent tears falling.

“Fix this.” Jooheon looked at Lay. “You can heal him.”

“The mind is a far more complex thing to heal.”

“But you can do it.”

“I… I don’t know.”

“No, the answer is yes, you can fix him!”

“Jooheon, I don’t-”

“Don’t give me that crap, you can!”

“I don-”

“Maybe we can.” Baekhyun interrupted. “When Haechan and the others were stuck in the inbetween they were pretty much comatose. You woke them up, so you could-”

“We knew where their minds were, knew where to go and get them out. We have no idea where Kihyun is, he could be brain dead for all we know.”

“Then take him there.” Shownu spoke.

“What?”

“Take Kihyun’s mind to the inbetween, if he’s truly alive then you’ll find him there, right? And you can bring him back.”

“Do it.” Jooheon said. “Whatever that is, do it.”

“We can’t just do that.” Suho said. “The inbetween isn’t our place. We didn’t wake the others up, we helped one of their own go in and get them out. We can’t-”

“Then call your friends! Get them to do this!”

“Jooheon-”

“What do we have to lose?” Minhyuk added. “We didn’t know what had become of  Kihyun until now, but this isn’t living.”

“The inbetween becomes a personal hell if you stay there.” DO said. “It’s not-”

“Kihyun put himself in a car accident.” Wonho cut in. “He knew the consequences then, he’d understand them now. So whoever you need to call, call them and try to save him, that’s all we’re asking.”

It got quiet. Suho looked around at everyone, the decision had fallen to him. He took a breath then looked at Lay, nodding his head.

“Lay, DO, with me. Xiumin, you and Chen know what to make, the garden here is like the one back home, so you should have what you need. The rest of you look after y/n.”

You had heard the commotions from before, but Baekhyun had you stay hidden just to be safe. Nothing that was spoken made sense to you, not until the end and talking about the inbetween. You peeked your head around the corner, seeing this person unconscious on the table. Everyone seemed busy with things so you carefully approached them. You looked at them for a while before someone else approached. They looked you over and then pulled you into a hug.

“Y/n!”

You didn't react, confused as to who was hugging you and why. He had such a huge smile on his face, but it faltered when he saw your confusion.

“Y/n, it’s me, Wonho, we grew up together, remember?”

“What?”

“We went to elementary and high school together. You disappeared a few years ago, we thought you were dead.”

“Wait, what? You’re saying we know each other?”

“Yes.” Wonho pulled up a picture of you and him together. “What happened to you?”

You were quiet, staring at the picture, then you looked over at Chanyeol who was in the room. The sad look on their face told you everything you needed to know.

“I’m... I’m from here, this world is my home… why don’t I remember that! Why don’t I remember my past!”

You started to panic, drawing a blank on your childhood, on everything before knowing them. Cahnyeol took a step towards you but you backed away.

“No… what’s going on… why don’t I-”

“A lot happened when we met.” Suho added, having overheard things and coming over. “We met by chance and you helped us but RF caught up to us, we couldn’t just leave you for them to do who knows what so we took you with us. We never planned to come back here and we couldn’t return you either. We didn’t want you to feel home sick… so we made you forget your past…” 

“I…” 

You had tears in your eyes, the lack of memories making you feel so lost. Your past had always been a fuzzy thing, and when you thought back on it something else always came up to distract you. This wasn’t how you thought you’d get answers. Even if you did know Wonho you felt nothing familiar about him.

“It’s our fault. We got you involved, we never meant to, I swear, but we had to keep you safe.”

“Did you?” You spat, eyes flashing black for a moment. “What you did… was it really for my own good… or for yours.”

You stormed out, not wanting to hear anything anymore, having some new information to deal with. Once you were gone the others looked at each other, then Wonho.

“You knew y/n?” Suho questioned.

“Yes, and I thought I knew you too.”

[liumoonlight]

It’s Me You Love

Pairing: Niki x fem!reader

Genre: College AU, Fluff, Angst, Friends to Lovers, Light Comedy

WC: 10k

Warnings: Mentions of drinking, Mentions of Arguing, Swearing, Mentions of kissing, Playful Fighting between Karina and Sunoo

Featuring: Karina, Winter, and Ning Ning from Aespa, Taeil from NCT-127, Sunoo and Lee Heesung from Enhypen. Mentions Jisoo from BLACKPINK. Mentions Yeonjun from TxT. Mentions Ryujin from Itzy

Synopsis: You were in the best relationship you could ever ask for. Lee Heesung was everything to you, but so was yours and his childhood friend Riki Nishimura. You hid you were in love from him for a long time, but you didn’t want to keep it a secret anymore. You decided that now is the time, but it comes at a cost: lose the best thing to ever happen to you or choose the one you’ve been in love with since you were a kid.

A/N: My first 10k fic 😩. Through the amounts of writers block, brain farts, and stress I finally finished this. Without a doubt I was really happy with this fic from top to bottom. I hope you enjoy!

We’re Just Friends

“Babe where are you?” you said to yourself while waiting in the school halls for class. You sat by your locker patiently waiting for your lover to show up. It had been almost an hour since he last texted you, and being late was never really his style. As you continued to wait, you swiped open your phone and scrolled through pictures of you and your boyfriend. “Heesung you make me so happy.” “Well I’m glad that I can make you happy.” You were so deep into your own space, you were unaware you were thinking out loud. You were also unaware that Heesung had slowly popped up behind you.

“Baby! Hi! Where were you?” you said as you hugged him. “Sorry ran a little behind schedule thanks to this guy.” You looked to see that Niki was also standing beside him. “Niki… did that really happen?” you said with a smile. “Of course not y/n. He’s the one that almost overslept again! Honestly what would you do if you didn’t have me Heesung? You’d probably drop out of college.” “Ahh whatever.” Heesung said playfully while messing up Niki hair. “Ahhh cut it out.” Niki said while straightening his hair. You laughed at the two of them as they played around until you looked down at your phone to check the time. “Shit I’m gonna be late. Bye baby I’ll see you later at lunch.” With a quick kiss, you turned and headed for your first class of the day.

“Hey y/n! Almost late again huh?” You turned to see your two friends and classmates Sunoo and Karina heading towards you. “And I see you two are walking together again.” you said as you let out a sly grin. “As if I would ever give Sunny here a chance. He has a better chance with Winter.” Karina said in snarky voice while trying to avoid looking in Sunoo’s direction. “And you have no chance of passing chemistry without me so I’d choose my words wisely missy.” “Ouch!” You laughed as you watched the two of them go back and forth. “Karina just give in. The way you two go back and forth all day with each other makes it seem like your already a couple. Besides Sunoo is head over heels for you” As you said that you could see Sunoo face turn from pale pale white to red instantly. “Hold on for one second y/n. Don’t try shipping us.” All you could do is laugh in response to Sunoo’s reply. “Did you finally confess Sunoo? About time.” “Karina you be nice to him.” You continued to laugh as your other friends and classmates, Winter and Ning-Ning walked up. “Oh my god you guys! Stop it!” Karina said while trying to hide her blushing face. “No way! He likes you and you like him! Besides he’s a sweetheart.” “I’m going inside the class.” Sunoo said as he paced away to his table. “I hope class goes fast today. I’m starving.” you said as you and the rest of your classmates walked into class. “It’s 9:00 in the morning. Do you ever stop eating y/n?” Winter said while taking her seat right behind you. “Of course not. All Heesung ever does is feed her and spoil her.” Karina said as she and Ning-Ning took there seats in front of you. All you could is smile in response.

Time slowly paced by as you sat in class. You tried to focus, and write notes as the teacher went on explaining the lesson, but even that wasn’t enough to stop you from thinking about Heesung. You sat reminiscing on all of your memories together. You had known him since the two of you were kids. He grew up two house down from you, and would often spend a lot of time at the park playing along side you and Niki. Some days, it would be just you two spending time with one another. You would ride bikes, eat ice cream, and watch movies together. You were only nine at the time these things happened, but you were sure you were in love with Heesung, even if you didn’t fully understand what it meant to be in love. Over time your bond with both Heesung and Niki grew making you inseparable, but as you got older, it was Heesung that you spent most of your time with making the feelings that you had for him even stronger. While he occasionally dated other girls that you knew, it would make you jealous in a way, but it never stopped the feelings you had for him. It wasn’t until senior year of high school that you both confessed how you felt for one another. From that moment in life, you had finally gotten the one person you wanted to be with. You felt you had the perfect life and the perfect boyfriend. Even now in your senior year of college you felt the same way you felt for all those years.

“Y/N!” You snapped out of your thoughts as Winter, Karina, and Ning-Ning stood in front of your table. You were unaware that the bell had rang for class to end.“You were daydreaming about Heesung again I bet.” Ning-Ning said smiling while looking you dead in the eyes. You were face was such a bright red that you couldn’t deny what she had just said. “So are you pleading the fifth on that?” Karina said while playfully waving your phone around. “Give me my phone. Why don’t you go and talk to your boyfriend he’s right over there.” You said smiling while pointing in Sunoo’s direction. “Really y/n?” Sunoo said while looking in disgust at Karina. “Well she’s not denying it right now. She hasn’t said anything.” Winter said while smiling at Karina. “Anyone hungry?” Karina said while trying to dodge the question you had asked. “Me! Let’s go!” You said with an excitement in your voice. “Your paying this time right Karina.” You said while walking towards the door. “Let me check my account. Baby are you paying this time?” Karina said with a pouty face looking at Sunoo. “Oh my god. Fine…” Sunoo said while shaking his head and heading for the door.

As you and your friends walked towards you pulled out your phone. You checked your notifications and then scrolled to your messages to see if Heesung had texted you. “Hmmm.” you said in pouty voice. “What is it y/n?” Sunoo said while trying to look into your phone before being hit on the shoulder by Karina. “Ouch! Karina what the hell?” Sunoo said with a slightly annoyed voice. Karina looked at Sunoo with an equally annoyed face. “Since when is it cool to ever look into someone else’s phone?” Karina said with a disgusted voice. “Since when is it cool for me to be paying for your lunch again?” Sunoo said with the same amount of disgust in voice before turning back to you. “Anyways what’s wrong y/n?” “Hubby can’t make it to lunch.” you said as you continued to pout. “Awww poor baby? Is it really that bad?” Ning-Ning said while scrolling through her phone. “Yes!” You said in an instance.

You were so bummed in the moment that you didn’t feel an arm wrap itself around your shoulders. “He stood you up? Don’t worry miss I’ll be your date.” Niki said while smiling and walking. Seeing Niki made you smile while also prompting you keep going along with what he had just said. “Date? Who said this was a date?” “I did. It’s on me.” Niki said whispering in your ear in a attracting voice causing you both to laugh. “Well hello there Niki.” Karina said in a similarly attractive voice. “Save that for Sunoo.” “Oh great you too Niki?” Sunoo said while putting his hand over his face. “It’s pretty clear she likes you. Take the chance.” “For the love of g-“ Karina said while pacing off towards the doors of the dining hall.

Your friends went in different directions once you entered the dining hall, while you and Niki went and grabbed food from the same area. “So did he say where he was and why he couldn’t make it?” You nodded your head no in response to Niki’s question “He’s probably studying or something.” You said prompting Niki to laugh in response. “Well I hope that’s going well.” Niki said in a sarcastic voice. “Cut it out Niki. It’s okay. He’s busy I can understand that.” “Yeah you’re right. Everything is okay. You got me. You always will.” Niki said smiling at you. “Okay?” You said smiling a bit awkwardly and not sure of how to respond to what he had just said. “Hey you two! What’s taking so long?” You both had turn to see Karina and Winter signaling for you. “Oh right forgot we have to pay!” You said as you trailed off behind Winter and Karina. You approached the register with your wallet in had ready to pay before Niki grabbed your wallet from your hand. “Niki you don’t really have to pay for me. I can pay for myself.” “I told you it’s on me.” Niki said smiling before inserting his card into the card reader. You tried to hide your smile but you could feel Winter and Karina looking and smiling right at you.

Just as you and Niki headed towards the table where the rest of your friends were sitting, Karina pulled you to the side. “I’m so jealous of you.” Karina said giving you a sly grin. “What are you talking about?” You said with a bit of confusion. “You not only have a hot boyfriend, but a hot best friend who I can obviously tell really likes you.” “Karina stop it. Me and Niki have been friends since we were kids. Its never been that way between the two of us.” “So you’re telling me that not once have you ever felt differently about him?” Karina said smiling. “No of course not!” You said while trying to keep your voice down. “Say what you want but I know he likes. True enough you have Heesung, but I feel something between the two you. He genuinely loves you.” “Okay love doctor. While your so concerned with me and my best friend, why can’t you put this much energy into telling Sunoo how you feel about him?” You reply was enough to make her walk away towards the table as you followed behind her laughing. “So what were you two talking about?” Sunoo said before taking a sip of his drink. “Karina wants to ask you out.” You said laughing before taking a seat with your plate. “Y/N really!?” Karina said before throwing a piece of fruit at you. “Real funny y/n.” Sunoo said before turning away from Karina.

After eating lunch, you and your friends walked the courtyard of the school. “I’m so bummed I got a test for my next class.” Karina said pouting. “You did study right?” Sunoo said while staring directly at Karina. “Yes?” “Great. I’ll see you at the library in an hour.” Sunoo said sarcastically while shaking his head and walking away. “I just remembered I have literature class so I’ll catch you all later.” Ning Ning said before heading towards the literature hall. “Y/N do you have any other classes today?” Niki said while continuing to walk. “No chemistry was the only class I had. So I guess I’m going to head back to my room.” “Lucky.” Winter said while scrolling through her phone. “Yeah I know right.” Karina said while continuing to pout. “Do you want me to walk you back to your room?” As Niki said that, your face turned bright red causing Winter and Karina to both look at you with smile. “No it’s okay Niki. I can make it by myself.” “What she means is yes I would love for you to walk me to my room Niki! Please!” Karina said in a playful sarcastic voice. “Karina!” You said while hiding your red face. “Seriously I’m okay Niki.” “Okay I understand. I’ll catch up with you later. Bye y/n.”

As Niki walked away you let out a sigh of relief only for Winter and Karina to walk side by side of you with smiles on their faces. “So are you sure you don’t feel the same about him?” Karina said while laughing slightly. “Yes Karina! For the last time we are friends and nothing more.” You said feeling slightly annoyed. “I wish my friend walked me to my room. Your lucky. He’s super sweet!” Winter said while wrapping her arm around your arm. “Not you too Winter. Seriously?” “I know Mr. Perfect is your boyfriend, but seriously honey Niki and you are a perfect fit for each other.” Winter said while walking ahead of you. “Heesung is all I need. Besides I doubt Niki has any feelings for me. He’s known me his entire life.” “I don’t know about that.” Karina said while still smiling. “Oh my god!” Winter said out loud. “What is it?” you said before stopping. “Taeil from my astronomy class just asked to meet up with me!” “Taeil?” Karina said looking disgusted. “You mean the cute one that’s like super nerdy?” “Yes him! And what’s wrong with nerdy?” Winter said feeling slightly offended. “Nerds are just not my type.” Karina said while continuing to look disgusted. “Will you come with me Karina?” “Why me?” Karina said while sighing. “Please. I don’t wanna go alone.” Winter said while pouting. “Fine I guess.” Karina said reluctantly. “Have fun Winter.” You said laughing softly. “Bye y/n!” Winter said while pulling Karina by the arm and walking away.

After ten minutes, you finally reached your dormitory. You approached your room door after exiting the elevator, sticking the key in and opening the door. You closed the door behind as you walked in, sliding your shoes to the side and laying down in your bed. You opened your laptop to a picture of you, Niki, and Heesung from your high school senior trip to the States. “We’re just friends and nothing more.” you thought to yourself as you continued to smile and look at the picture. Your focus shifted to Niki in the photo completely. You knew that there was some truth to what Karina had said earlier. Niki was your best friend, and you were very aware of how he felt about you when you were kids. You recalled having a small crush on him when you were younger, but you thought nothing more of it. It was always you and Niki until Heesung entered your life. “What if it was you Niki? How would we be as a couple?” You thought quietly to yourself as you laughed. Back then it was so easy for you to tell how Niki was feeling. He was like an open book to you being He would tell you everything no matter what it was. Years later during high school, and even now in college, he began to get a bit quiet in regards to how he felt about anything. He went from being an open book to more or less a closed off person that just went with the flow, but even with that you both continued to have an amazing friendship and bond.

“Im thankful for you Niki.” You said as you slowly drifted asleep.

The Confession?

You were awaken by knocks on your door. You looked drowsy eyed at your phone to see it was 7:00 p.m. Slowly you pulled yourself out of bed and made your way to the door. Still somewhat half asleep you unlocked the door not bothering to ask who was there. “Baby! Hi!” you said excitedly realizing it was Heesung and Niki. “Hey there sleepy head. Did you miss me?” Heesung said while running his fingers down the side of your face. You nodded and smiled in response as you slowly moved in to hug him. “Oh I’m sorry! Hi Niki!” Niki waved in response from down the hall slightly smiling. “How was your day?” Heesung said while smiling at you. “Better now that I see you.” You said in response while continuing to hug him. You let go of Heesung, inviting both he and Niki in.

“You slept almost all day.” Niki said while walking towards your laptop desk. You felt something was wrong with Niki but thought nothing of it as you focused on Heesung again. “So what brings you to my domain good sir?” You said to Heesung while playfully running your hand through his hair.” “Well I missed you.” “And Karina and Winter invited us over to their place for a game night.” Niki said as he looked in to you and Heesung’s direction. “Oh great she’s having another game night? Why didn’t she say anything about this earlier?” You said while turning to your closet. You knew that a game night at Karina’s was anything but a normal night. She and Winter lived off campus in apartment together, so school rules were pretty much nonexistent. You knew pretty much every game she played from top to bottom, and you also knew that she pretty big on drinking games. “You know Karina and Winter plan stuff last minute. So you can just about imagine how the night is gonna end.” Niki said while turning pages in one of your notebooks. “You wanna go?” Heesung said while grabbing you and pulling you closer. You smiled in response and kissed him while Niki shook his head in disgust and continued going through your notebooks.

You grabbed a hoodie and the three of you made your way out the door and into the elevator. You and Heesung held hands and talked playfully before you noticed Niki walking ahead of you both as if he didn’t want to be bothered. “I wonder what’s wrong?” You thought to yourself as continued to walk. As the three of you approached Karina and Winter’s door you could tell something was visibly bothering Niki. “Niki are y-“ “Y/N, Niki, Heesung! Welcome! Come on in” Before you could say anything, Karina and Winter opened the door greeting and inviting the three of you inside.

Once you entered, you were met with music playing, and a few people that you were familiar with sitting around on the floor. You knew Taeil from last semester thanks to having one class together, and because he was the one Winter was interested in. You saw Sunoo talking with Jisoo, Ryujin, and Yeonjun from chemistry class. You turned to see Heesung talking with Karina, while Niki was sitting off in a chair in front of the television. Before you could walk over in Niki’s direction you were cut off by Winter handing you a glass with a dark red liquid in it. “Enjoy that.” Winter said while smiling and singing the words to the song that was playing. “Mmm.” You said as you took a sip from the glass. You were familiar with the taste of Sangria as it was one of your favorite wines. “How much have you two had tonight?” You said while turning towards Winter. “Surprisingly none. I’m trying to loosen him up first.” You looked as she pointed in Taeil’s direction who you could see had a smaller cup in his hand. “He looks nervous.” “Yeah drinking and gatherings aren’t exactly his cup of tea, but I really wanted him to come.” Winter said while smiling and winking her eye as Taeil looked from across the room.”

“Hey Karina mind if I play your switch?” Niki said sitting in front of the television. “Sure go ahead.” Karina said before pouring a glass of pink wine for herself. “So you bought both of them I see.” Winter said smiling before taking a sip of wine from your glass. You had coughed from swallowing the wine in response to her question. “It’s the other way around. He was the one who told me about this. He’s also been acting a bit distant tonight.” “Maybe you should try talking to him. I want you both to have a both to have a good time. Besides your amongst all of your friends.” You nodded and smiled before taking another sip from the glass. “Winter?” “Yeah?” Winter said before turning to walk away. “So there is something I have to talk to you about.” As you said that, Winter walked in closer. “So I-“ “Hey baby. Hey Winter.” Before you could say anything you were cut off by Heesung wrapping his arms around you. “Hey there Mr. Perfect. Came to snatch my woman from me?” Winter said jokingly. “Just for a few mins. I’ll bring her back I promise.” Heesung said while smiling at you. “Very well. We’ll talk later y/n. You two have fun now!” Winter said before walking off.

“You okay?” Heesung said while looking at you. You nodded your head yes in response, but truthfully you weren’t. You were concerned about Niki. He hadn’t said one word to you since you all left your room. You kept wondering if you had said something or did something that may have upset him. “I’m okay. I promise. Are you enjoying yourself?” “I am. I hate I can’t stay though.” “Why?” You said with a pouty face. “I’m meeting up with a few of my classmates to do some late night studying.” “This late though?” You said while still pouting. “I’ll make it up to you I promise y/n” Heesung said before kissing you softly on the lips. “Okay fine, but just so we are clear that’s twice today. You owe me lunch.” You said while smiling. “Done. I’ll deliver it to your door.” Heesung said while trailing his fingers down the side of your face. With another kiss, you watched as Heesung walked out the door.

You then averted your attention to Niki, who was focused on the video game. You walked in his direction wondering if he would actually tell you what was wrong, or would he just tell you he’s okay? “Hey Niki.” You said before sitting in a chair next to him. “Hey.” “Is something bothering you? You haven’t said too much of anything since we got here.” “I’m fine y/n.” Niki said dryly while continuing to focus on the game. “You would tell me if there was something wrong right Niki?” As you said that Niki paused the game while slowly turning in your direction. “You know I would y/n. I’d tell you in an instant.” “Do you promise?” You said while holding your arms open for a hug. “Yes I promise.” Niki said while softly patting and rubbing your head before turning back to the television screen. You couldn’t help but smile as you walked off. All the worrying about Niki was washed away like a wave of water crashing down on a beach.

You continued enjoying yourself as the night went on. You sat on the couch, eventually falling asleep. “Y/N! Y/N!” You were slowly awaken by what sounded like distorted voices. “Ugh… keep it down. My head is pounding.” “You are a total light weight you know?” Karina said giggling at you while continuing to clean up. “Shut up…” you said slightly slurring your words. You tried to move to your body to get off the couch, but your body felt like a ton of weights. The most you could do is move your head to the right of you to see Karina and Winter cleaning while Niki was wrapping up trash bags and carrying them out the door. “Heesung…” you said out loud. You pouted for a few minutes before realizing both Karina and Winter looking at you slightly confused. “What?” You said while placing your hands over your face. “Your definitely intoxicated” Winter said while laughing. Intoxicated was not the word you would use to describe yourself in this moment, but your body would disagree with you. You felt as if you were floating in an ethereal space trying to think of what to do to get your body to move off the couch, but nothing worked as you continued to lay in the same spot. “Alright that was the last of the trash. How is she doing?” You turned your head to see Niki walking towards you. “Very much intoxicated. Can you get her home Niki?” Karina said before taking a seat right next to you. “Anyone ever tell you that you and Sunoo would so cute together?” You let out a snicker, prompting Karina to look at you in disgust as a response. “Okay come on let’s go before Karina kicks both of us out. Literally.” Karina continued to look at both you and Niki while contemplating the idea of kicking you both out with her boot literally. “Alright come on my light weight.” Niki said as he slowly bent down to mount you on his back. You continued to shout and laugh as Niki carried you out of the door, not really thinking much of what you were saying.

You found yourself gazing out at the night sky as Niki carried you on his back. You always found the starry night skies beautiful as a child. As you stared, you started to reminisce on those nights you and Niki would play outside way past your curfew. “Those were good times in life.” Niki said while continuing to walk. “Hmm?” “All those nights where we played around at the park, and grab snacks from the 7/11 store knowing we weren’t supposed to be anywhere near downtown with out my mom.” You laughed quietly to yourself as Niki continued on with the story. “Are you reading my mind or something honey?” You said before laying your head down on his shoulder. You could see Niki smiling before eventually coming to a stop.

“Awww why are we stopping?”

“Look ahead!” Niki said with excitement. You looked up to see a 7/11 mart ahead of you. Your face lit up with excitement as Niki ran carrying you his back. “I can’t believe as much as I have walked this neighborhood I never seen this.” You said before jumping off his back. Niki smiled, nodding in agreement with you before opening the door. “After you my lady.” “Aww your such a charmer.” You said before walking in. You felt like a kid in a candy store as you look around at the shelves. They had candies and chips that reminded you of your childhood. “So do you know what you want?” “I want noodles and dumplings” you said pouting. Niki smiled as he walked to back to grab noodles and dumplings for the both of you. You watched Niki as he put the noodles in the microwave to warm. There was a feeling that made your heart race for a second. You knew Niki was your friend, but from his actions, and the way you interacted made it feel like more than that. You were so thankful for him being in your life.

“Oh could I have a melon milk tea please?” You said as you grabbed the drink from the freezer. “Make it two.” Niki said while smiling at you. “Yay!” You felt giddily as you walked towards him with the drinks. “Ahh done.” Niki said as he pulled out the noodles. “Oh my god! They look amazing.” You said with a happy voice. Niki smiled and walked away towards the register to pay for the items you bought as you set the table for the both of you. Niki made his way back to the table sitting across from you. You both grab the chopsticks and high five one another just before chowing down.

“Hey Niki?” “Yeah?”

“Why don’t you have a girlfriend?”

You could see Niki almost choke as you asked that question. “Wait what?” Niki said as if he didn’t hear you. “Why don’t you have a girlfriend? We’ve been around each other all of our life and I have never seen you so much as show an interest in someone. I mean there’s gotta be at least one person you’ve shown interest right?” “Let’s change the topic.” Niki said while avoiding your question. “Ooooh! So there is someone? Tell me about her.” “No because there is no one.” You could tell he was lying, and you could also tell he wanted to avoid your question by any means possible. The two of you were always honest with one another growing up and even now that never changed. You had never seen Niki interested in anyone other than you when you were kids, let alone he never talked much about being in love or any type of feelings that related to that topic. It was such a gray part of his life, but you could tell by his reaction that there was something he wasn’t telling you.

“So there’s literally no one you have ever had any feelings for at all.” You said while looking him directly in the eyes. “Just one.” Niki said while averting his eyes from your direction. You sat up excitedly waiting for him to continue.

“So tell me about her.” Niki let out a sigh and took a sip of his drink before continuing on. “So there is one person I’ve had feelings. In fact I’ve had feelings for a while.” “Is she pretty?” You said jokingly. “She’s beautiful.” Niki said while smiling. “She’s an amazing person to be around. She’s the highlight of my day. Being in her presence makes everything better. We have a lot in common.” As he said that, you began to think about who this person could possibly be. It definitely wasn’t anyone from your group of friends, but you didn’t rule it out either. You snapped out of your thoughts before asking another question. “So have you told her how you feel?” You could feel his energy change as you asked that question. His smile suddenly disappeared and suddenly his voice became a bit more serious. “Well… that’s the problem. I can’t bring myself to tell her how I feel.” “Why not?” You questioned.

“Because I’m afraid. Not just afraid of rejection, but also losing this person. When I’m around her I can barely form the words to tell her how I feel about her. I don’t know if she feels the same about me, and honestly that’s the scariest part.” You could tell whoever this person was meant a lot to him. You hearing him speak his feelings aloud made you smile, but it still made you question who it may have been. You slowly grabbed his hands and held them up hoping it would comfort him. “Niki. You are one the sweetest people I know. Anyone who gets to know you is extremely lucky because you are amazing. I don’t know who the person is, but it sounds like you don’t just like her. It sounds and feels like you are in love with her.” You could see Niki’s smiling again as you said that. It made you even happier to know that your words could comfort him. “If I ever meet her and she doesn’t feel the same way about you, I’m definitely going to tell her to look in the mirror and realize that she’s missing out on something that’s truly amazing.

“Some advice you should take for yourself.” Niki said before letting go and walking towards the door. You wondered what he meant by that, but you didn’t think much on it. “You can’t just get up and leave your trash.” You said jokingly. “I bought the food. That’s your way of paying me back.” Niki said before running out the door. You trailed behind him after throwing away the trash.

For the rest of the walk it was quiet. You kept thinking back to what Niki said earlier. You tried not to dwell on it, but you found yourself constantly thinking about who it could’ve been that Niki was talking about. Was it you? As much as you wanted to shoot down the possibility of it being you, it seemed as if the person he talked about sounded a lot like you. You loved Heesung, but you also loved Niki. True enough you got over your crush you had on him as a kid, but what you felt for him was still there. He was afraid of rejection just like you were afraid of him rejecting you when you were younger. “Why couldn’t I just bring myself to tell him back then.” You thought to yourself. You knew the answer. You had chosen Heesung, and as much as you wanted to tell Niki what you were feeling, you knew telling him everything now would only make things more complex between the two of you.

You continued walking eventually reaching your room. “Well we are here.” Niki said while smiling at you. “Yeah.” “I’ll see you tomorrow?” You nodded in response to his question. “Goodnight y/n.”

“Niki wait!” “Took you long enough.” Niki turned only to kiss you softly. The warm feeling from kissing his lips were enough to make everything you were thinking disappear. You felt like you were in a dream scenario as you kissed Niki again, but a dream was all it would ever be as you slowly snapped out of your thoughts. “You okay y/n?” “Niki I-“

“I love you.” You tried to retract your words as you realized what you said. You just told your best friend that you loved him. Unsure of how he would respond, you braced yourself. “I love you too. Good night y/n. You felt your heart drop for a second as Niki. As you walked inside your room, you were unsure of what just happened and what to feel. Your mind and heart were telling you two different different things in the moment. Your heart was fixated on the fact that you confessed unknowingly to your best friend that you were in love with him, while your mind was telling that the two of you only love each other as friends, and nothing more. You tried to forget about it as you laid in bed, but nothing worked as you continued to think of Niki.

“I really do love you Niki. I meant that.”

Your thoughts from the night before combined with no sleep whatsoever poured into the following day. You sat quietly in class even your friends are wondering what was wrong. You couldn’t focus one bit. You could feel your phone vibrating from the amounts of notifications you were receiving but not even that was enough to avert your thought. Niki was the only thing on your mind.

As you walked out of your lab class for the day, you realized Heesung was standing right in front of the door way. “Hi baby.” You wrapped your arms around him tightly as he did the same in return before you slowly pulled away. “That’s all I get? First no morning meet up and now no kissies from you. You could tell he was joking but you couldn’t form a sentence to reply. Instead you kissed him but not with the excitement and feeling that you always felt. “You okay?” You honestly wanted to tell him what was going on in your head and what your heart was feeling, but instead you opted to lie. “Yes I’m okay just kind of cram studying for my next exams have me tired. Are you okay?” “I’m even better now than I have you in my arms.” You smiled faintly but it was gone in an instant as you thought of Niki again. “Oh shoot. I gotta go baby. We should get lunch later. Sound good?” You nodded as he kissed your lips and walked off in the other direction.

“So what was that all about?” You were so out of it that you didn’t hear or notice Karina walking up. “Long story.” “Let’s walk and talk.”

“So what’s going on?” You could feel your heart racing as you were asked that question. “So I- I told Niki I loved him last night.” You could see Karina smiling from excitement. “How did he take it?” As happy as you wanted to seem, the thoughts plus mixed feelings about the entire situation still bothered you. “Well… he said he love me too but…” You and Karina both came to a stop as you paused your sentence. “I don’t think he meant it the way I meant it last night. I think he meant it purely from a friend standpoint, and honestly it stings a bit. I don’t even understand why I’m feeling the way I am right now. I haven’t been able to focus or sleep. I acted like Heesung didn’t even exist today. I feel so stupid.” You and Karina took a seat at a near by bench. She tried to comfort you as much as she could, but was unsure of what to do. Truthfully it did sting. You felt like your heart was rip out and stomped, but your conflicted emotions also made it hard to understand whether these feelings were right or wrong.

“You’re in love.” Karina said while hugging you. “I love Heesung. What do I do? I could never hurt Heesung like that.” “I’ll be honest y/n, I don’t know.” Karina tried to come up with any possible answer she could hoping it would help feel better about the situation but it didn’t help. “Winter is better at this kind of thing than I am. I have complications myself.” “Like what?” You sat up at full attention as Karina grabbed her bag ready to walk off. Karina let out a sigh before saying anything. “I can’t believe I’m saying this but I think I do like Sunoo.” You tried to hide your laughter as much you could but Karina had already caught you. “Why did you let this happen?” “Don’t look at me. We already knew it was going to happen.” You said while continuing to laugh. You and Karina continued to walk before she had to leave for another class. For a few minutes you were smiling before finding yourself in your thoughts again.

“Why can I just forget about this?”

The rest of your day consisted of stress, confusion, and not being to focus on anything. The day felt torture more than anything else. You made it back to your room hoping a nap would help make you feel better, but even that didn’t help you. “Being in love is so complicated. What the hell do I about this?” You threw your face into your pillow, letting out a long sigh before sitting back up thanks to your phone ringing. Not caring to see who it was, you slipped in one of your headphones and answered the call. “Hello?” “That’s a kind of dry way to say hey to your best friend.” Not being able to focus on anything today was one problem, and now the person that was responsible for you feeling the way you felt is on the the other end of the phone. Things were definitely going wrong today. “Hey Niki.” “You don’t sound okay. Is something wrong?” If only he knew the shit day that you had all thanks to him being on your mind. That would’ve been enough to end the conversation right there, but you couldn’t let him know that. “I’m fine. Just a little tired. Classes drained me out today.”

“Aww man I’m sorry to hear that.” “Anyways what’s up?” You both went quiet for a second before Niki responded. “I wanted to grab lunch for us. I wanted to go back to that 7/11 from last night if you were interested?” As much as you wanted to say yes, you didn’t wanna make the situation anymore complicated than what it already was, and you had already made plans with Heesung. “I’m sorry Niki. I told Heesung that I’d have lunch with him today.” “It’s okay I understand.” You could tell he was a a bit disappointed by the sound of his voice. “I’m sorry.” “Don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault. There’s alway next time.” Niki said trying to a positive attitude. “Yeah sure.” You tried to keep yourself together while also feeling that Niki was completely bummed out at your response. “I’ll talk to you later y/n.” “Bye Niki.” You said before hanging up. After hanging up, you felt worse than before. You felt like the most terrible person alive for turning down Niki in exchange for Heesung, but at the same time with the way today went you honestly just wanted to be alone. A few minutes later while trying to get your head together, there was a knock at your door.

“Hey baby.” You opened the door to see Heesung standing with bags of food. “Delivered as promised.” You smiled as you let him in thanking him for the food. “Maybe I can try and forget about it just for a minute. Please give me a break.” You said to yourself before closing the door.

It’s More Complicated Than I Thought

“Not gonna lie, girl this is a lot to take in even for me.” You laid your head down on the library table in defeat. You explained everything that had been going on lately to Winter expecting a different answer, but not even she knew what to do. “So you’re saying I’m fucked and that there’s no clear cut way to fix this.” You said as you threw your hands up covering your face. “No honey I’m not saying that. What this is all comes down to is what are you going to do?” Winter said as she grabs your hands. “I don’t know Winter. I have million thoughts of Niki running through my mind every second. I can’t even begin to tell you the shit show of a day I had yesterday.” “Have you talked to Heesung?” You sighed out of disappointment. “He bought me lunch yesterday and he stayed with me for a bit but even with that I could barely say two words because I was so deep in my head.” As you covered your face, Winter hugged you, hoping it would bring you some comfort. “So any progress while I was gone? Both you and Winter nodded no as Karina approached the table with drinks in her hand. “Here this is for you honey.” Karina said as she handed you a strawberry milk tea. “Thank you.” “I know you’re confused right now but we’re going to figure it out.” Karina’s word made you feel a lot better. The three of you spent the next hour studying while also making conversation before Winter and Karina left for their classes for the day.

You walked campus for the rest of your morning. Bored of just walking, you decided to walk back to your room and just kill time. “Hi y/n!” You were joined by Ning Ning as you walked back to your room. “Hey Ning. How are you?” “Packing my brains for my last classes before we leave out for break.” “Break?” You said as you were confused. “Spring break?” “Oh yeah. I forgot that even existed.” You and Ning Ning laughed as you continued to walk across campus. The more you talked, the better your day was getting. You didn’t think about the situation that was going on in the moment. For once you had a piece of mind. You had finally made it to your dormitory after walking for what felt like forever. You and Ning Ning both stayed on the same floor so you both decided to take the elevator instead of you taking the stairs like you usually do. As you waited for the elevator to stopped, you pondered should you talk to Ning Ning about your situation. You had talked to your other friends, but you got no answer that would help comfort you. Ning Ning wasn’t the biggest on relationships but she always gave you the best advice out of all your friends. “Well I’ll see you later y/n.” “Wait Ning I-…” You grabbed Ning Ning by the arm as the elevator doors opens. Ning Ning could tell by your expression something was definitely wrong.

“I need some advice.”

“Of course honey.” You both stepped off the elevator going to Ning Ning room instead of yours. Ning Ning unlocked and opened the door to her room letting you in. You had been to Ning Ning’s room before but not long enough to truly appreciate how aesthetically pleasing her room was compared to yours. You felt like it was a safe haven. You took a seat at her computer desk and began to explain the entire situation from the top to bottom. “So yeah that’s the entire story.” “Honey from what you’re telling me sounds like you’re in love with Niki.” Ning Ning said while smiling. “I’m confused Ning. Like I don’t even know how to act around him anymore. I’ve blocked out my feelings for Niki for so long, and now I don’t know how to even tell him that.”

Ning Ning continued to comfort you as you talked. “You should start by really asking yourself. Are you happy with Heesung? Do you really love him?” What kind of question was that? You loved Heesung. He would never do anything to hurt you. “I gotta go Ning. I’ll catch you later on.” “You’ll figure this out y/n. If there’s one thing I know is that you will know what to do in the end.” You smiled and hugged Ning Ning as you walked out the door. For the rest of the day you thought back on your conversation with Ning Ning earlier. You tried everything to come up with a solution to handle your problem, but nothing worked or made sense. Your thoughts were interrupted by knocks at your door. Not sure who it could be and why, you slowly made your way to the door to unlock it.

“Hi y/n…”

To your surprise it was the one person you were hoping it wouldn’t be. “Niki. What are you doing here?” You could tell from his face something was wrong. “I need to talk you. Can I come in?” You nodded letting him in as you had a feeling of how this conversation was about to go. You closed the door offering him a seat on your bed as mentally prepared yourself for what was about to come.

Niki sat in silence as well as yourself. You could tell he was nervous to say anything as he began fidgeting his fingers. “Y/n I-…” “Niki… kiss me.” You were both taken aback by what you just said. “Did you mean that y/n…?” You covered your face to hide the red that flushed over your checks. “Im sorry Niki I didn’t mean t-.” Before you could finish your sentence, Niki pulled you in softly kissing your lips. As much as your mind told you to pull away, your heart was saying to make this moment last as you lost all strength to his warm soft lips. As he began to pull away, you pulled him closer kissing him slowly climbing on top of him as he wrapped his arms around you. You couldn’t stop yourself as this was all you had thought about since the other night. You wanted this moment to last forever as you continued to kiss him.

“What the hell!?” You both looked up to see Heesung in shocked as to what he just saw. Your heart stopped as you tried to find the words to explain what you had just done but before you could say anything Heesung walked away causing you to chase after him as Niki laid in shock. “Heesung wait! Wait please! It’s not what you think.” You could see the hurt in his face as you continued to try and get him to hear you out. “Please let me explain Heesung.” “What is there to explain? Tell me y/n. Please explain how I just saw you kissing Niki so that it can make sense.” You tried to find the words to explain your actions, but you knew there was no explaining your way out of this. You felt the tears falling down your face as Heesung walked past you and into the elevator. You were met by Niki standing in your doorway as you walked back with tears falling from your face. “Y/n I-.” “Niki I need you to go.” You said walking past Niki into the room. “Y/n what we just did… I-…” “Niki I really don’t wanna talk right now. Please just go. Leave me alone.”

“What we just did… that meant something. You can’t tell me it didn’t.” “Go away please!” You cried out as you covered your face to hide your tears. You heard your door close as Niki walked out. You planted your face into your pillow, hoping it would stop the the tears flowing down your face, but nothing worked. You couldn’t stop your mind from racing with what had just occurred. You felt terrible for what you had just done, but you couldn’t blame anyone but yourself.

The following days afterwards, were a lot more gray than usual. You sat in your room, shutting yourself off from your friends and even missing class. You didn’t bother to check your phone, being you didn’t wanna talk to anyone. You had lost motivation to do anything that would make you happy. Hell even smiling seemed impossible in this moment as all you thought about was making the biggest mistake you could’ve ever made. You missed Heesung, and you missed Niki. All you could think about was fixing your error, but you knew that the damage you caused Heesung was irreparable at this point. You felt like nothing would ever be okay for you ever again as you laid in silence in your room.

You were drawn back to reality as you heard knocks on your door. You ran as fast as you could to open the door hoping it would be the one person you had wanted to see so badly. “Baby I-. Oh…” You opened the door expecting it to be Heesung waiting on the other end with open arms, but instead it was Karina. “Come here honey. I know you need one more than ever right now.” Karina said as she held her arms out. You hugged her tightly as you cried. After letting her in you made your way back to your bed as she followed behind you. “So you made your decision I see.” Karina said while sitting beside you on the bed. You nodded your head in agreement to what she had said, but you knew that it didn’t make you happy to admit. “I’m the worse person ever… I kissed Niki and lost both my boyfriend and best friend in the same moment…” “Honey you’re not the worse. Don’t even talk like that.” Karina said trying to console you. “Have you seen Niki?” “He’s honestly in worse shape than you. He looks like he’s drained of all of his energy. He’s only been around Sunoo but even then he only comes to class and afterwards he just disappears.”

“Yo y/n. Knock knock.” “Speaking of which. Hey Sunoo.” Karina said while shooting Sunoo a look of disgust. “I’m here for y/n.” Sunoo walked over to you giving you a hug. “Thanks Sunoo. So… how is he?” “Honestly… he’s a wreck. He’s been blaming himself for whatever went down between you two. He looks exhausted.” Hearing that made you feel bad. You couldn’t point fingers at anyone but yourself. “You two need to talk to one another. I hate to see you two like this.” Sunoo said before walking out the door. You nodded before telling him bye. “I honestly don’t know what to do.” You threw yourself back on the pillow before letting out a long sigh. You knew the longer you ignored the situation it would never be fixed. You wanted to make everything right but you didn’t have an answer for how to. “Whatever you decide, you’ll know in your heart it’s what you wanted. You’ll have your answer eventually.” Karina gave you one last hug before walking out the door. “Oh and by the way. Don’t make me have to come back over here. I expect to see you bright and early tomorrow. Lunch and then dinner afterwards. Got it.” “You got it.” You said before smiling.

It Was Meant To Be

The following day was pretty normal. You felt a bit better than the last few days. Your friends made sure to check in on you through out the day. You got through your classes thinking less about the situation as you went on through the day. You knew you would eventually have to deal with it, but you wanted to enjoy the relief that you were feeling even if it was just for today. After lunch you and your friends talked for a bit before leaving for the rest of the day. You spent your day mainly walking campus and listening to music occasionally. You walked until you came to a stop, taking a seat on a bench in the courtyard area of school. You sat with your music playing in your ears while gazing out at the few people you saw walking by.

“Hi y/n.”

You didn’t notice that Heesung had taken a seat next to you until you looked in his direction causing your heart to stop for a minute. “Heesung I-… hi.” For a few minutes the two of you sat in silence. You couldn’t find the words to explain your actions from the other night. You could tell he was hurting while also trying to gather the words to say something to you. “You have every right to not ever want to speak to me again.” You said breaking the ice. “I’m not upset. True enough I’m hurt but I’m not upset at you. Truth is… I kind of had a feeling for a while that eventually it would happen.” Hearing that made you cry. You tried to wipe your tears to where he wouldn’t see you crying but before you could he pulled you in giving you the most comforting hug. “I’m sorry.” “It’s okay y/n.” Heesung continued to comfort you until you stopped crying.

“I love you y/n. I always will. No one will ever replace the love you gave me. You’ve given me the best moments in life I could ever ask for. I’m thankful for everything. I will always be apart of your life. Always.” You smiled as Heesung wiped the tears from your face. “I’ll never forget you Heesung. I love you.” You gave one final big hug before he got up to walk off. You knew the pain he was feeling still lingered. “You should tell him. Tell him the truth y/n. There’s nothing holding you back.” You watched as Heesung walked off. It was a bittersweet moment, that you had honestly wish didn’t happen but you knew that you would be okay and so would he.

You made your way back to your room reflecting on all that had happened today. A part of you felt happy while the other part of you felt empty. You kept thinking back to what Heesung said earlier. You knew what you had to do, but didn’t have a clue as to how to do it. You were interrupted by your phone ringing. You didn’t recognize the number but answered it anyway.

“Hello?” “Hi y/n!” You recognized that it was Ning Ning. “Ning Ning? Did you get a new phone?” “Sorry. I would’ve used mines but it’s dead. Had to borrow a friend’s. But anyways. I need you to do me a favor.” “Okay?” You said sounding a bit confused. “7:00 p.m. Meet us a-.” The phone started to break up as you tried to make out what Ning Ning was saying. “You want me to what?” “Meet up at the courtyard fountain tonight at 7.” “What for?”

“You’ll see.” “Okay I’ll see you there.” You ended the call completely confused as to why or what was so important about later tonight, but you thought less and less about it as you scrolled through your phone.

Night fall had approached as you made your way to the courtyard. As you walked you wondered what could your friends have a planned at such an odd hour on a school night. “You could’ve at least gotten dressed y/n.” You turned to see Karina and Winter walking up towards you. “Well no one told me to get dressed. Besides this is comfortable for me.” As you pointed to your long sleeve and jeans. “Come on.” Winter said while giggling. The three of you made your way to the courtyard fountain. Before you got any closer Karina and Winter threw their hands over your eyes acting as a blindfold. “Karina? Winter? What are you doing?” “Just keep walking.” Winter said as she grabbed your hand. “No seriously what the hell? You said feeling more nervous than comfortable. The three of you came to a stop. You could hear the water flowing from the fountain meaning you were pretty close. “Okay keep your eyes closed, and hold your hands out.” Karina said as she and Winter moved their hands from over your eyes. “Okay.” You said while still trying to figure out what was going on. Suddenly you felt your hands being grabbed. Whoever it was the feeling was warm. It made you feel comfortable enough to smile. “Hello stranger. Not sure what my friends are doing but don’t be surprised if I jerk away.” You said while keeping your eyes closed.

“I won’t let that happen.”

You immediately opened your eyes as you recognized Niki’s voice. You hugged him as a flood of emotions came over the both of you. You had missed his touch and you could tell that he missed yours as well. “Niki I-…” “I love you y/n. It’s been you since the beginning. I been in love with you since we were kids. I hate that I wasn’t able to tell you in the beginning but I was afraid because I thought you would never see as more than your friend. Even to this day my feelings for you haven’t changed one bit. I know I’m not Heesung. I’m not perfect by any means, but all asking for is a chance.” You were over come with tears of happiness as Niki confessed his feelings for you. You were so confused in the beginning being that you had Heesung, but you knew the answer all along. It was Niki you were in love with. Even through all the uncertainty and confusion you put yourself through you knew it was Niki. Wasting no more time you wrapped your arms around Niki pulling him in kissing him.

“You don’t have to be anyone but you. I love you Niki.” The two of you embraced one another as you kissed each other again. Your friends watched from the sides happily as they saw the two of you finally together. You had never been happier. You knew this was where you wanted to be. You no longer felt the pain you felt from days earlier. You knew that this moment was yours. You two were meant for one another and you would never let go of one another. You were meant to be.

©️liumoonlight 2023,

[dojae-huh]

Sometimes I couldn't help but think of the vast difference between the shipping culture of Korean fans and the international fans. International fans love eating up company ships like JaeYong. In Korea, JaeDo and MarkWoo are the most popular NCT ships. Yet I remember when that ranking came out, a lot of international fans were confused because it's not really the popular ships in the international fandom (in their own words, "Do these ships even interact?" lol). It makes me wonder if they even know their idols at all, because for example, I don't follow MarkWoo that much but anyone with a pair of eyes and ears can see how close they are, especially when watching contents and their own lives. Mark had said countless of times how he is close to Jungwoo and vice versa, they even dropped honorifics with each other. Out of everyone in NCT, Mark probably considers Jungwoo as his closest friend. But then again, their fans remain blind to this. Don't even get me started with JaeDo, but I think everyone already knows so I'm not gonna explain about them anymore. When I was a new fan in the NCT fandom, all I knew is I like Jaehyun. I hadn't explored any form of shipping culture within the fandom. I remember watching NCT Life in Gapyeong and that is the first time I am witnessing the group dynamics. And then I noticed Doyoung. That mafia game where Jaehyun picked him as his co-mafia was the exact moment that made me go "Huh, wait. There is something in there". Mind you, I was clueless about their relationships with one another. So I decided to watch more contents, checking if that was only a fraction of a baseless assumption, and boy... all I can see is JaeDo's chemistry, I would even call it the sexual tension between them that is so high up the roof. Makes me think if fans cannot discern the subtle group dynamics and obvious clique among members, because if you watch them closely, especially in contents, you will get to see who is close with who, who is fond of who. Even up to know, a lot of people do not acknowledge how obviously closer Jaehyun, Doyoung, and Haechan have gotten and that is so easy to see in their recent contents. Korean fans can obviously eye those relationships better than International fans, just see who the majority ship and you'll realize they are the members that are actually close in real life. Also, this is something that I noticed. A lot of Doyoung fans ship him with Jaehyun, either in a devoted or casual way. There are some who are dedicated Doyoung solo stans, not a shipper, but would tweet Jaedo-related content every now and then. They obviously adore Jaehyun and maybe that has something to do with all the doting (the pining looks and affectionate stares) and tangible forms of affection (attending DY's solo gigs, sending food trucks, etc) that Jaehyun does for Doyoung. But among Jaehyun fans... heh. He's so popular among shippers, majority of them that dominate are JaeYong and JaeWoo shippers. Does it have something to do with Jaehyun's loverboy image? It's so funny to see the contrast.

MarkWoo

"I-fans" is a super broad term, but I guess we all mean English-speaking part of X, and it is heavily influenced by Western fans and their ideas, they just overwhelm writing in English SEA and other i-fans.

I wonder if it depends on the type of involvement. Many i-fans seldom watch content with their chosen group, relying on short moments and re-telling on socmed. It also can be the difference in attractiveness of certain members or archetypes of relationships.

If we compare MarkWoo and JaeWoo. There were Jack&Rose, JaeWoo sightseeing in Japan, Jae teaching Woo bowling, they were roommates with TMIs, and there used to be many DJJ photoshoots. It is easy to watch this short list, choose to like the ship because of it, and later ignore everything else. MarkWoo had many lives, but their bonding moments are overshadowed by YuMark in official content. As you said, you need to pay attention to notice them in bts videos, listen to what they say about each other. And stan fanwars show that many ignore what idols say (Tae proclaiming his endless love to Do in the case of Tyongfs who hate Do).

Another possible thing. Koreans watch their idols like hawks, they follow their every move and interaction, make maps of stores and investigate how far the hotel Jae stopped at is from the venue Taeyeon had her concert, which Doyoung was attending, etc. They look for information to support their suspicion. What you and I did. While many i-fans are more of passive consumers, eating up what socmed brings, listening to what other people say, and believe what SM and idols present. Many get easily fooled by contradicting information and multiple versions. For example, Yuta said he likes Mark hundred of times. Jungwoo calls his outings with Jae as dates, writes on bubble he sleeps in his bed (when they were roommates), tells stories about Jae playing music box for him in their room, they make challenges (to mock Do). One clear narrative in both cases. Meanwhile Do and Jae don't know each other one day, tease another, say they are close and send each other food trucks, but don't congratulate with BDs on IG, their interactions are cut out from bts.

Many Korean JaeDo fans are Jaehyun-biased. Probably, the way Jaehyun is perceived, what fans he attracts and for what reasons plays here a role. Doyoung is also not popular in the West.

[gamerwoo]

selling albums & a lightstick!! :)

hi friends!! i’m currently looking to sell some albums that i don’t want anymore, as well as a lightstick. for the most part, i'm just looking to sell for what i bought it for or a little less if some/all of the extras are missing. these albums were basically looked through once and then put on a shelf, so they're in decent condition, just a little dusty

below the cut is more info, pricing, and shipping at the bottom, as well as a link to my depop if you'd prefer to buy through there!!

(pls reblog to spread, i really need to make some extra money for travel in a few months!!)

exo lightstick -- SOLD

i bought it firsthand but it was on sale because the box was damaged (hence the stains. they were there when i bought it and the box doesn't close). i only put batteries in it once when i got it to see if it worked, but took them out immediately after. other than that, it's never been used so i'm just looking for the discounted price i got it at (it also still has the stickers it comes with!!)

sf9 rpm album -- $15 + shipping

photobook & cd

zuho id card

zuho photocard

jooyeon photocard

zuho poster

missing group poster

bts the most beautiful moment in life: young forever album -- $7 + shipping

photobook & cd

missing all extras

exo the war: the power of music album -- $15 + shipping

cd

xiumin photocard

there's so many loose items in this album box but i'm pretty sure everything is there. just in case, i'm asking for a little less than i paid for it

ateez treasure ep. 2: zero to one -- SOLD

photobook & cd

hongjoong photocard

group photocard

poster

calendar

stickers

nct 127 cherry bomb album -- SOLD

photobook & cd

missing all extras

monsta x take.1 are you there album -- $20 + shipping

photobook & cd

minhyuk photocard

shownu photocard

jooheon, wonho & shownu unit photocard

group photocard

shownu polaroid

group photo

i can't remember if it came with a poster or not but just in case i'm asking for lower than what i paid

monsta x shine forever album repackage -- $25 + shipping

bought secondhand

photobook & cd

jooheon cd

missing extras (that's how it came)

signed by wonho

since i got this secondhand, it is a little beat up and the sticker on the packaging is ripped so it doesn't close

shipping info!!

shipping is not covered by me!

shipping within the united states will be roughly about ~$5-$10

i would like to only ship within the united states, but i'm willing to ship internationally. i won't be paying for shipping, and shipping internationally is really expensive, especially since i'm shipping independently (in some cases, it's more expensive than the items themselves) so i feel bad making someone pay a ton for shipping. if you're outside of the u.s. and are still interested in buying something including the cost of shipping, you're more than welcome to reach out and i can estimate how much the shipping cost will be!

here's my depop where everything above is listed!

otherwise, payments will be through paypal! i will need to ask for your full name as well as your address, so you'll have to be comfy with that!! if you're interested, please dm me! and if you have any questions, feel free to send an ask or a dm!! 💛

[taexoxosgf]

RULES !

this is an 18+ blog. if you are a minor and interact with my work, you're automatically blocked. If you are a minor or support minors writing smut, you're also blocked.

I always welcome constructive criticism.

feedback is appreciated as well as reblogs.

I do NOT have a tag list.

DO NOT rush me. Every time someone presses me for a fic or release of something I just don't want to post it anymore. It feels as if I have to release it rather than put out content I enjoy. Rushed work will also feel rushed if I am trying to get it out asap.

reccomendations

since my old account has all my old recs, I decided to start over.

requests for recs are always welcome, but it may take some time due to the reading and compilation of works.

requests for specific lists such as angst, smut, or fluff will be shorter

who I write for (subject to change)

I currently write for nct

nct: I mostly write for mark & jisung but will write for other members as well. as of january 2024, I only write for nct dream.

I DO NOT WRITE

incest (with the exception of stepcest), non-con, pregnancy, illegal age gaps, fics with kids in them, marriage au's, piss or blood, puke, shit, necrophilia, underage characters in sexual situations, male reader (I don't have experience with reading or writing this au so I don't wanna bullshit it), hardcore yandere, ship fics, werewolf, furries, omegaverse,

*my fics usually have verbal consent, and if it doesn't specify, main characters have agreed before in my head while I was writing (lol)

*if my characters are underage, sexual content will only be in the FAR future when they are of age. I'm not going to write when they are freshly 18.

*I will not use these words in my sexual content: sir, master, kitten

LASTLY,

BE NICE! IT'S NOT HARD !

[tracegf]

thanks for the tag @lewispullsman mwah <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3? six <3

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 35060 hehe

3. What fandoms do you write for? at the moment i write for top gun and call of duty but previously ive written for sw, football rpf, nct rpf, criminal minds, etc, lol.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

just wanna be yours (soapghost and injury tending)

fleeting (cobb vanth/din djarin)

freestyle (sambucky my beloveds)

hand in unlovable hand (my pride and joy!)

deep dive (sambucky again!)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? i try my best to reply to every single one! sometimes a few slip through the cracks and i feel awkward replying after a while but all comments are loved and reread over and over!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? it was in my kpop rpf days and it had a major character death in the end.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? id say none of my fics end unhappily but if i had to pick then hand in unlovable hand!

8. Do you get hate on fics? no god bless!!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? i try to! im working towards including it in my writing more so really, anything that sounds exciting to me is something im willing to explore and write.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? no, im not big on crossovers.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? hopefully no.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? yes :)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? i have but a long long time ago and we never completed it.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? its hard to pick but at the moment i read the most sereshaw and soapghost!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? an arranged marriage fic i wrote for nct!

16. What are your writing strengths? i love bickering and i love flowery descriptions so probably those <3

17. What are your writing weaknesses? smut </3 and also the fact that i write at a pace of a dying snail

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i tend to avoid it because i dont want it to be awkward and i don't really enjoy reading lots of dialogue in another language especially if it isnt translated either!

19. First fandom you wrote for? one direction on wattpad, a long long time ago lol (#zarry supremacy!)

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? based off of the fics on my current ao3 id say i love all of them! i try not to post stuff im not 100% satisfied with anymore.

tagging @gearshifted and if anyone else wants to do it, consider yourself tagged! :)

[misswoozi]

Okay cap. Johnny/Kun. It starts as a very casual 'youre sexy, im sexy' and also finding outside the industry partners is exhausting fwb situation. They were both also sleeping with other people from their group and others probably.

Somehow tho things started to get weird. One of them would get a bit moody when a 'you up??' Text got ignored, there was jealousy and possessiveness from both sides whenever members got together and sometimes even at award shows and performances.

Thing is neither of them would really talk about it directly. Instead the sex just got rougher and more desperate; they know better than to mark arms and necks but they got creative with hickies littering inner thighs and handprint bruises across asses. Slowly they stop seeing their other fwbs, canceling hookups for late night convenience store runs.

Eventually all 21 other members are pretty sure theyre in an official relationship and wondering why tf they havent been told. So, who calls them out, or is it a groupwide intervention?? Do they admit feelings then and there or do they say theyre just fucking and maybe talk about it later?? Do they last??

Sorry for the quality here, im making this up off the top of my head whilst cooking.

AKSLADGLSDGLS DON'T APOLOGIZE, THIS IS PERFECT, WE HEADCANON JOHNKUN THE EXACT SAME WAY?????

they are my go-to NCT angst ship lmaooo I feel like every group has one true Angst Ship that is just simply not meant to be endgame and never meant to have a happy ending and for me, it's JohnKun. Like yeah they like each other, yeah they're attracted to each other, yeah they make sense together but it's just not meant to be -- and when you factor in the fact that they're in 2 units of the same group that BARELY interact anymore, you have yourself a God Tier heartbreak ship and I am so fucking INTO IT

so! JohnKun, FWBs who secretly caught feelings but neither of them will admit it. like you said, they channel their jealousy into rougher and rougher sex (it's so tough because I think they're both pretty strict tops but I DO have a top!Johnny/bottom!Kun video on my Twitter that I'm obsessed with)

they fuck in secret for months before they get called out, and it's Jungwoo that confronts them about it. he pays attention and JohnKun have been acting shady towards each other in full group settings and he just says, "so how long have you two been sleeping together?"

Jungwoo calling them out finally forces them to sit down and talk and they decide to try DATING. and for half a year, it's a pretty good relationship. but they're both so stubborn in their own way and 127/WayV have such different schedules (sometimes even in different countries) and so it doesn't work out. it breaks both of their hearts WAY MORE than they let on (to each other or to their members) and it's a heartbreak that heals poorly but they get through it. full group promotions (like NCT 2021) are still a little hard but they're both moved on.

[letmeoutofthebasementt]

mines more so if i like the group or their songs then i follow them for some time unless i end up bored easily which happens a lot lately bc theres so much available now compared to my earlier years haha. fr the difference in music today tho like sometimes i love it sometimes i dont care enough for it and there usually has to be smth really different for a group to catch my eye.

other times im just looking for something thats my taste in terms of their songs rather than if so and so is attractive or not. so with the younger groups that are being debuted its really much less abt attraction and i can actually enjoy their songs a bit more casually as its not as serious as my 1d phase was rofl. im so embarassed bc even today the 1d members are still popular but looking back it was lowkey cringe of me. but again i dont know what i seem to truly like anymore cause it never has to be that deep yaknow? it just the way these groups are constantly supposed to have deep connections instead of enjoying their songs for simple pleasures of listening rather than obsessing abt them as potential bfs. its kind of funny to me when on their vlives they call younger members oppa and im like shit im so old bc theyre all juniors, like every nct member but taeil, seventeen and so on. bts are nice even mix of age ranges neither too young nor too old for me to feel comfortsble following them. if ateez were any younger then yes it would be so weird

im just glad we didnt have much social media back then either bc there werent anything like fancalls to do and there werent too much toxicity besides a bunch of delulus like the shipping and so on but then thats always been a recent things i think its never going to go away unless they change up the group format or do less skinship (poor joong he hates that)

As long as I could remember there were definitely insane fans. Granted I wasn’t into KPOP back then, so I dunno. And I get you on the professional bfs thing.

I’ve never really been the type to be into a celebrity to the point of being like “Oh that’s my man that my man I’ll marry him one day” like…No

[kflixnet]

PART I | PART II | PART III | PART IV

• athena, [ soobisms ] ↳ she/her | aespa, en-, txt “ttyl! omw to kwangya w soobs!”

• ari, [ aakomii ] ↳ she/her | skz, en-, txt, atz “i can talk about beomgyu for hours.”

• elle, [ hvcmixtape ] ↳ she/they | svt “we’re at a space of infinite possibility, take my hand and let’s ride.”

• emmy, [ andkisses + blushgyu ] ↳ she/they | txt, tbz, en- “if taehyun is antartica, i'm the face of the sun.”

• felix, [ yourfatherlucifer ] ↳ he/him | atz “i have too many wips, oh no i made another one.”

• hera, [ svnoofy ] ↳ she/her | nct, svt, atz, exo, skz, txt “the universe is against me writing smaus.”

• honee, [ yeonjstxr ] ↳ she/her | txt “i think we should all tax bad things. like racism, and yeonjun’s thirst traps.”

• honour, [ drmflm​ ] ↳ they/them | cravity, en-, svt, txt “what even is a bias anymore :’).”

• irina, [ woosluv ] ↳ she/her | atz  “my delusion-ship with mingi keeps me going.”

• isabella, [ lveclouds ] ↳ she/her | bts, atz, svt “i just spend three hours staring at a blank word document, i call that progress.”

• jelli, [ awooghan ] ↳ she/her | skz “day [???] of missing han jisung.”

• jen, [ ayayiiie ] ↳ she/her | en- “writing is an art we can feel without the need of speaking.”

• jey, [ jeysamores ] ↳ she/her | en- “all of nct dream noticed me at their concert because i was the loudest person there. mark complimented how loud my scream was and they all pointed me out (we're married btw).”

• jia, [ ilynaevis ] ↳ any pronouns | aespa, en-, nct, skz “part time cereal fan full-time chenle appreciator.”

• lav, [ tinysushimark ] ↳ she/her | nct, skz “24 to 25 babe... just stay with me.”

• leo, [ seung-scrittore ] ↳ any pronouns | skz, trsr, txt, tbz, nct dream, en-, dkb, the rose, atz, mx, eric nam, jackson wang, eaj, jessi, dpr, kai, amber liu, hyuna & dawn, demian “unironically cries over hwang hyunjin on a daily basis <3.”

• mae/julia, [ sureogi ] ↳ she/her | cravity, tbz, stayc, txt “loving ham wonjin 25/8.”

• mai, [ maiverie ] ↳ she/her | en- “who needs birth control when u have ur face.”

• mallow, [ miyseung ] “I don’t search for eternal truth, I search for motivation.” ↳ she/her | (g)i-dle, skz, en-, ive

• mango, [ mangocustard16 ] “hoshi is mine *fight me*” ↳ she/her | en-, svt, txt

• mari, [ ynsvnte ] “crocheting gets me tired, but sunghoon doesn’t for sure. ” ↳ she/her | en-

• maria, [ bambisgirl ] ↳ she/her | en- “i have two addictions, caffeine and lee heeseung.”

• michi, [ cybrsan ] ↳ she/her | atz “99% of my process is thinking about my wips, the other 1% is actually writing them.”

• miso, [ misojunnie ] ↳ she/her | en-, txt, nct, svt, bts “𝐞𝐧- ♡ #jxnglvr cherrywonie !! 明华 ming hua, she/they, writer, engene.”

• mirai, [ nyanggk ] ↳ she/her | en-, txt “people say nothing is impossible, but i do nothing everyday (definitely did not just took that off of google bcs i have no originality).”

• mofy, [ bless-311​ ] ↳ they/them | tbz “mofy duck enthusiast!”

• moni, [ zzoguri​ ] ↳ they/them | tbz “i rest easy knowing kim sunwoo is more delusional than i could ever be 🙏🏼.”

• monica, [ softsan ] ↳ she/her; atz, bts, txt, nct, en-, skz “i don't meow for men, i meow for poetry; we are not the same.”

• moon, [ beautifulchris​ + fylithia ] ↳ she/them | skz, txt “be a little more you and a lot less them.”

• moon, [ meiideryz ] ↳ she/her | nct (all) “wayv comeback season is near! (in my imagination).”

• morgan, [ heonijs ] ↳ she/her | en-, tempest, txt “storm in her eyes, peace in her smile.”

• nat, [ nateezfics ] ↳ she/her | atz “no thoughts, head empty. just existing.″

• niwa, [ haechanhues ] ↳ she/her | atz, en-, nct, skz, svt, tbz, trsr, txt, victon “love that for me.”

• nix, [ njmverse ] ↳ she/they | nct “rip my wips i never finished.”

• noa, [ hqrana ] ↳ she/her | skz, svt, cravity, en- “when life gets you down... raaaaaah 🦅❗️.”

• noelle, [ icyminghao​ ] ↳ she/her | svt, boynextdoor “if you love a flower that lives on a star, it is sweet to look at the sky at night. all the stars are a-bloom with flowers.”

• nynx, [ meowrinz ] ↳ she/mew | nct, le sserafim, en-, nmixx “happy lesbian visibility year.”

• pearl, [ milkyruins + euphoriaatrash ] ↳ she/her | en-, skz, svt “delivering love one draft at a time <3”

• rania, [ wheeboo ] ↳ she/they | svt “imma just “hehe” my way through life.″

• red, [ shining-red-diamond ] ↳ she/her | astro, atz, block b, bts, day6, exo, ghost9, got7, mx, nct (all), nex7/9%, oneus, pentagon, romeo, svt, shinee, skz, tbz, txt, vixx, wei, xeno-t, z-boys “oh, where is my hairbrush?”

• ren, [ mygnolia ] ↳ any pronouns | bts, en-, skz, txt “student by day sunghoon simp by night.”

• ria, [ monatice ] ↳ she/her | mx, victon, atz, svt, astro, en-, kingdom, tbz, skz, txt, bae173, gncd, omega x, cravity “you can make anything by writing.”

• riel, [ linonyang ] ↳ she/they | skz “dubidubidapdap, dubidubidipdip.”

• rin, [ svhnflwr + milktyama ] ↳ she/they | atz, nct, tbz, en- “you cracked my cookie d:”

• rose, [ yangsrose ] ↳ she/her | nct, atz, txt  “your efforts will never betray you. all your efforts will pay off.”

• sage, [ seo--changbin + seoberrybins ] ↳ she/her | skz "editing your drafts include just staring at them for a while before closing them again and calling it a day."

• salty, [ sxcret-garden + starry-nights-garden ] ↳ she/her | atz, got7, nct (all), oneus, p1h, txt “too many fic ideas, not enough brain juice.”

• saph, [ zeawoo​ ] ↳ she/they | en-, trsr, txt, nct dream “madame, monsieur jourdain is very knowledgeable.”

• sara, [ wongyuuu ] ↳ she/her | svt “i have 100 ideas but only ever write one of them.”

• saya, [ lluringli ] ↳ she/her | en- “love is a timeless melody that echoes in souls and resonates through the corridors of eternity.”

• savannah, [ ox1-lovesick ] ↳ any pronouns | txt “it’s so sweet, but i should find my name.”

• sei, [ seungstarss ] ↳ she/her | en- “🗑← home sweet home.”

• sharmi, [ day6andetcetera ] ↳ she/her | day6, txt, skz, bts, itzy, got7 “ur mom.”

• sia, [ wonieleles ] ↳ she/her | en-, bts “writing to procrastinate is my favorite activity.”

• sierra, [ silvermistcosmos ] ↳ she/her | en-, nct dream “student by day, writer by night.” 

• skar, [ reverbtunes ] ↳ she/her | skz, txt “je mange le croissant.”

• skits, [ hotteoki​ ] ↳ she/her | atz, skz, txt, en- “beomgyu.”

• sky(ven), [ lheewonz ] ↳ any pronouns | en-, txt “i have a terrible case of 'i start everything i write with dialogue'-itis and writing my story backwards.”

• smiles, [ boba-beom ] ↳ she/her | txt, en- “good things take time :)”

• smt, [ songmingisthighs + smt-here ] “i'm not a writer, i just have mental illness and too much to say.” ↳ she/her | atz

• sof, [ txt-yaomi ] “tomorrow x todoro.” ↳ she/her | txt

• sol, [ myjisung ] “i'll try over and over again if i must.” ↳ they/she | skz

• solar, [ hyunestrella​ ] “um...slay?″ ↳ she/they | skz

• star, [ like-a-diamondinthesky ] “if i spent as much time on academics as i did on tumbr, i'd be the top student. yet, here we are...” ↳ they/them; skz

• sue, [ soobnny ] “whoever prayed for my downfall, you won.” ↳ she/her | en-, txt

• sumi, [ 02chois ] “lower your expectation so you’ll always reach them.″ ↳ she/they | txt

• sun, [ halaboyz ] “the f in sun stands for funny.” ↳ she/her | atz, en-, tbz

• sunny, [ daegall + niskoo + namistangerinee ] “eugene belcher kin.” ↳ she/her | nct, en-

• ti, [ sulfurcosmos ] “you ever wonder if julius caesar would enjoy a good caesar salad? maybe he should take a stab at it.” ↳ she/her | skz, nct dream

• tia, [ fae-renjun + https-dandelion ] “head empty, only huang renjun.” ↳ she/they | nct, tbz

• val(erie), [ kyrjnie ] “delulu is the solulu.” ↳ she/her | en-, skz, txt

• vee, [ skazoo ] “writer (derogatory)” ↳ she/her | bts, skz, en-, atz

• via, [ hyungjunnie ] “studying law in the day but also daydreaming about leehan, maybe that’s why im failing…” ↳ she/her | bnd, riize, svt, xdh, zb1

• whitney, [ mikrokcsmos ] “more than a memory, less than reality.” ↳ they/them | bts

• xia, [ carpexiem ] “mentally deranged, but beautifully wine aged.” ↳ they/them | en-, txt, p1h

• xin, [ prettywon ] “chamber 5? more like chamber of deez nuts.” ↳ they/them | en-, txt

• yena, [ in2fly ] “decisions? never heard of her.” ↳ she/her | &team, en-

• yomi, [ yeokii ] “i’m in a romantic relationship with myself in my head.” ↳ she/her | txt, en-, zb1

• ynn, [ rsmura ] “writing fics over essays? yes.” ↳ she/her; en-

• ysa, [ neoaevis ] “ooooooopss i did it again, i guess?” ↳ she/her | nct

• yumi, [ cupidjyu ] “hyunjae is the love of my life !!!” ↳ any pronouns | tbz

• yun, [ amakumos ] “i don’t care if i’m failing math. where’s jungwon?” ↳ she/her | en-

• zainab, [ missmadwoman ] “f*** the patriarchy keychain on the ground <3.” ↳ she/her | en-

• zanna, [ slytherinshua ] “ppl are talking abt the law💀 but what abt eunwoo i have my priorities okay.” ↳ she/her | txt, svt, bnd, &team, skz, en-, bts, lucy, verivery, victon, astro, onf, sf9, tbz, tws, park jihoon, hwang minhyun, kim woojin

• zoe, [ badwithten ] “there’s already two zoes in this network, multiverse of zoes.” ↳ she/her | skz

[coffee-n-milk-tea-boba]

23, 22, 20

SM is really just fucking with my favorite group right now and it's kinda annoying me.

Like, I don't know, I personally feel silly to be agitated but I was really into their whole concept of forever expanding. Like, I looked forward to new members joining, it was fun for me for some reason. Though I could partially understand not wanting anymore members, like could you, in actuality, imagine 30 to 50 people being a group. That’s basically a whole label right there. How do you fit that many people on one track for their annual one song come together. (Black On Black, Resonance, Beautiful). Anyway, other than them not being able to handle that many members, I see no reason to change that concept. But then it’s like why did do that concept in the first place if you feel it would be too much?

I don't know, my thoughts are a bit everywhere and I feel like this new shit is because of the lack of Lee Soo-min being in charge but I don't know anything about that part of things.

Also... if Sungchan, Shotaro, and those 3 other SM Rookies are gonna be a new group... why couldn't they still have been an NCT unit? We suspected that shit anyway and Sungchan and Shotaro already debuted in NCT so...por qué?

All I'm gonna say is they better not pull some dumb ass move like they did before, with Yuta and this new Japanese group (switching Winwin with Jungwoo, and shipping him off to WayV, like we wouldn't notice). They do that, and I honestly feel like imma be done. 127 would be so weird without Yuta and it would be even weirder to have some new motherfucker jumping in to "replace" him.

I know shit changes, but it feels downhill...

[dojae-huh]

No one's talking about the improved relationship of JohnJae during this comeback. Just observe the two interact now, and there is certainly an "easy" feeling between the two. Jaehyun now reciprocates more of Johnny's antics, and they even pair up together sometimes. So unlike the Jaehyun who saw him as competition (to DY) in the past lol

Let me add my opinion on Doyoung and Jungwoo's relationship as well. Somehow, Doyoung dotes on Jungwoo a lot, but JW isn't in Doyoung's circle. It's like an older brother having affection for a younger brother, but there is a lack of intimacy between them in the form that Jungwoo is not Doyoung's go-to person to talk with (unlike Haechan, Mark, or even Johnny). I bet Jungwoo does not have an idea most of the time what goes through Doyoung's head.

Which brings me to an another point: how amazing JaeDo's telepathy can be. During contents, you can see the both of them smoothly support each other when they speak, they get the inside jokes together, glances and fleeting touches are enough to know what the other is trying to convey. Which is what is lacking with JohnDo (how it baffles me that majority thinks JohnDo is closer than JaeDo during the ship war... lol). From time to time, you can observe the disconnect between Johnny and Doyoung, but cultural norms and context might also get in the way. Doyoung isn't engrossed all the time to what Johnny is doing, unlike with Jaehyun where you can see him notice every quirk of Jaehyun, but tries so hard to not react. JaeDo's rapport is thousand miles ahead than any other of Doyoung's relationship with the rest of the members (if there is someone that could come close, that would be Haechan.)

JohnJae have a history of EnNaNa, there was a period of roughly 2 years of a daily live radio show that aired at the 11-12pm slot. Da-i-ly. (they did pre-recordings sometimes) The two worked together a lot, as well as ate together after their shift. More than DoJae during their MC days.

This explains why there is a rapport. Jaehyun cameback to it, to what was in the past. This fact also highlights that if there is a difference in characters, even working together away from the group won't make idols into close friends.

It's true though that Jaehyun shows his jealousy very seldom this year. He is finally secure in his position, heh. JohnDo patching their friendship also could have played a role. Jae doesn't need to worry Johnny is making Do uncomfortable anymore, doesn't need to feel protective.

By the way, I always thought that Jaehyun personally going through "Johnny's hands" helped him to mitigate his jealousy and perceive JohnDo in the right way. He knows how touchy and attention-demanding Johnny is, he also knows his good sides, what he needs and likes (as they shared a lot on the radio about their childhood, dreams, views on things, etc).

NCT is really a long sitcom. From a smol dongsaeng riding on his hyung's back to boyfriend/friend rivalry over Do. Jaehyun also had a period of demanding to be perceived as a grown up. And with the 95-line he behaves as a same-age friend now. Only Taeil is his "real" hyung to whom he still clings as he used to to everyone from the hyung-line in the past.

Dreamies were imprinted on Doyoung as children, he still can't see them as grown ups. He will forever feel the age gap, be the mom. With Jungwoo he refused to treat him as a child right away (you are 21, you are an adult). It is super hard to get into Do's inner circle or get really close to him. Renjun tried. Do also tried to meet him half-way, invited to the dorms, cooked for him. It ended at that. They became closer, but not close. The older people get, the harder it is to forge new friendships.

My favourite photo of 2Dongs.

Back then Dreamies were size smol.

The difference in characters and mental age with Jungwoo doesn't help. Notice how many friends Doyoung has in their 30s. He is comfortable with people he has a 10y+ age gap with. They are interesting to him. As for Woo, he said himself Do is boring, they don't match each other's freak, heh. And Woo has other people to go to. NCT's social circles are bigger now. During trainee/debut period they had only each other. JohnDo were forced to adjust to each other, for example. They wouldn't be friends if not for being in the same group and Johnny being a foreigner.

Cultural differences play a role, all neos just write off JN's weird to them antics as "he is an American". However, even with Tae Do isn't as attuned and sometimes needs a few seconds to realise what the other needs. JaeDo are really one mind in comparison.