#or sending a rude message anonymously for no other reason than being a bully

[agentmarcuspike]

psa tumblr blog pedgeconfessions is a hatefully bully giving other hateful bullies a platform to spread disgust for no reason and you should ignore and not interact with it. it’s so embarrassing to be part of a “community” that does this with no shame. so many people i’ve met here and now call my closest friends are being targeted purely because they have what some people consider a “large following”. they’re labeled mean and condescending and even called slurs, and harassed by people making up dangerous rumors about them with no root in reality. i’ve never seen proof of there being any truth to these baseless accusations, other than “personally i didn’t like this thing”, and people jump on that toxic gossip train (yeah i said it) as if it isn’t headed straight for the cliffs. said blog supports and even encourages that behavior. // Oh my gosh stop crying people on this site are literally assholes stop acting like this was such a great place and everyone is friends and it's just this one person trying to divide us, no there's a mass exodus because people are douchebags and when you call them out on it they want to feign ignorance and then make themselves the victim and cry a damn river, and if they have enough friends oh they're going to ride hard for their "victimized" friend and harass people like the bullies they are. All of you are the type to know that there's a problem but not want it to actually be out there so you just quietly talk to them in the DM no it's good that this is getting out there's a lot of rude cliquey fanfic writers who either steal other people's work or just write the most trashiest things and then when you give them constructive criticism they get mad. A lot of these people are not nice people just because they're nice to you does not mean they're nice to anyone else there's a reason why there are so many people sending in things about them they're not good people sorry but your friends are not good people. A lot of you see what happens on this app and you stay quiet but when it affects you or your friend that's when you want to ruffle feathers and call out names you all are a joke.

i can only speak for myself but this actually was a great place for me because of a lot of these people being anonymously targeted. i have yet to see the behavior these people are talking about, or someone non-anonymously saying something, but i know if i see someone i love being douchebags i’ll message them privately, or “quietly talk to them in the dm”, not post about it or complain anonymously to a gossip blog, because i believe that’s how people change, not through public embarrassment.

i get mad too when i receive “constructive” criticism i didn’t ask for on something i made for fun. and when people steal and take credit for something i made. and rightfully so, i’d be a victim of theft.

how do you know people see the things you claim they stay quiet about? a lot of people like me mostly look through our friends’ blogs, as we don’t have time to scroll through everything from everyone we follow all the time, and so of course when something affects me or my friends i’m gonna wanna talk about that. i AM on this site for me and my friends. not to constantly post about social issues or better myself as a person or whatever, i do that in my real life with people whose names i know and whose eyes i can look into. you don’t know what people do and don’t to off this site. this is where most people come to take a break from all of that, and then this is what we’re met with.

not allowed to be a victim, not allowed to speak up for yourself, not allowed to make mistakes or to not be updated on everything all the time. even when people actually make an effort, which they don’t owe anyone, to change their behavior they’re criticized. insane

[dearestones]

Twisted Wonderland Matchup: Jade Leech #3

Anonymous Request: Hello! If matchups are still open, I'd like to send a platonic one in for Twisted Wonderland

I'll go by ⭐. My pronouns are she/her

Appearance: I am South Asian with long wavy black hair. Usually tie my hair in a half ponytail at the back because I like how it looks and I don't really like the feeling of hair on my shoulders. I am 165 cm tall and reasonably fit

Personality: I'm calm, collected and hardworking. I can be a bit aloof and arrogant sometimes, but I make sure it doesn't get out of hand. I am curious and perfectionistic, and I'm also pretty academically smart (though I sometimes struggle with impostor syndrome). The gifted kid burnout syndrome is catching up, though. People say I do have a bit of a cold facade, but once they get to know me, I'm much warmer and gentler than they initially thought. I care deeply for my friends and my family, so I'll do whatever I can for them. I do face a lot of pressures too from having to be the perfect oldest daughter, the therapist friend (despite psychology not being my major, more of a special interest) and from having to do well in school (engineering is kicking my ass low-key). I often bake my closest friends and family a cake on their birthday with a silly message written on it. I also has a soft spot (special interest) for outer space and love to stargaze wherever the skies are clear

Likes: Books, herbal tea, art, lofi hip-hop, video games, anime, drawing, spicy food, affogato, outer space

Dislikes: Incompetence, unnecessary conflicts, bullies, fake friends dishonesty, cruelty, dog-eared book pages, anyone who dares threaten her family, loud noises, itchy fabrics

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After going through the description given, I believe that you best pair well with Jade Leech!

Well now, Jade isn’t trying to be rude, but he is tickled pink that you are very short—at least in relation to him. He’s taller than most of the population, but it’s still humorous to stand by your side so that he can loom over you. You can think of it as bullying, but he’s just teasing you… And possibly testing how intimidating he is so that he knows how to best coerce you into Azul’s deals. 

(Don’t worry, once you get closer to Jade, he’ll try to convince Azul not to include you into his plans. There are no promises, however, depending how chaotic and entertaining it’ll be, he might just do the opposite). 

Your personality somewhat complements his. The both of you are calm and collected and hard working. In your case, however, you probably work hard to achieve your goals whereas Jade spends most of his energy enabling Azul and ensuring that Octavinelle has an upper hand amongst the other dorms. 

He is also quite interested in you when you reveal that you are aloof and arrogant. He was not sure what to expect from you, but knowing that you can be quite cold was a variable that he had not factored in! What’s most notable is that you’re self-aware of it, which is more than what he can say for some of his peers. 

Jade is also a fairly curious person! He loves hiking up mountains by himself and foraging for mushrooms that he has never seen before. His inquisitiveness also extends to you: what are your dreams? Your aspirations? You’ll find that when you talk to him, the more he’ll either unnerve you or happily engage you in wonderful conversation. (Be very careful if you catch his attention, though. Jade can either be your best enemy or your worst friend if you continue being interesting). 

Your cold facade is certainly very entertaining! If he finds you entertaining enough, he’ll be gratified to know that you are almost the opposite to how the two of you met. It’s a mission well done in his opinion and he’s glad to know that you consider him a friend once everything is said and done. 

If there’s one thing you should also know about him is that he’s also deeply protective of his friends and family as well. He may not be as tender as his brother and he shows his affection through teasing and casual torment, but if the time ever arises that you need his help, he’ll be your support. (For a price, of course, but you can settle the payment afterwards).

Whenever you feel overwhelmed with your many duties as the eldest daughter in your family, as a therapist in yoru circle of friends, and your school life, Jade will happily lend his talents to relieve you of your many burdens. Depending on the severity of the situation, he might just ask you to accompany him on a short walk to clear your head or maybe he’ll even treat you to some of his favorite mushroom dishes. Who knows, maybe your stress may decrease once you have food in your stomach. If the problem is far more tangible and pressing, he’ll try supporting you in ways that positively impact you like keeping you accountable while studying or listening to you vent if life becomes too much.

Oh my, you love stargazing! For some odd reason, even if he has seen stars from under the sea, he still finds the sky one of the more pleasurable things to observe. Often, he’ll find himself lost in the stars… Would you be willing to share you time stargazing with him? You don’t wish to speak if you don’t want to, Jade understands silence and even more so when he watches the stars above in serenity. 

Making tea is practically Jade’s love language. Sure, he has to do it for the Lounge because it’s his job, but he also likes curating and brewing new teas for his loved ones. If the both of you have time, you can spend it watching him prepare the teas and listening to him explain what inspired him to create such a brew. If you’re lucky, you might find your new favorite tea as a result from his experimentation! (Since you’re such a good friend and earnest in your love for tea, he’ll let the issue of compensation slide. For now).

If you’re friends with Jade, be prepared to realize that this stupidly tall eel mer is the sort to test your friendship time and time again. However, once you gain his respect, you’ll find that you have landed yourself a lifelong friend who will sacrifice his newfound pair of legs for you if the situation ever arises. 

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If you want to donate a Ko-Fi, feel free https://ko-fi.com/devintrinidad.

TWISTED WONDERLAND MASTERLIST

[babbushka]

Please read the whole thing ❤️

Hey everyone, Zannah here. 

I’ve taken some time and stepped away from this platform after all the drama that happened a month or so ago, and in that time I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. Thank you all so much, for your kindness and support in allowing me to unplug for a little while, I really needed that break just for my own sanity. I hope that in this time, you all have been doing as well as you can in this very stressful year. I’d like to take this brief moment and thank my most dear friends who have been my rock. This experience has shown me that good friends, truthful friends, are hard to come by. If you have them, please make sure they know how much you love them.

You know, I’ve been on this platform for just about ten years. For a few of those years, I’ve been here in the AD community, and I can honestly say I’ve never had a more negative experience in my life, from the actions that I’ve witnessed and experienced. I stayed away from people I didn’t like, I didn’t read fic I didn’t like, I avoided content and artwork that upset me, because I’m an adult. And foolishly I was expecting others to do the same, because as I always say, your internet experience is up to you to cultivate. You are responsible for no one else’s actions other than your own.

I’ve dealt with people coming into my inbox condemning me for the way I interpret fictional characters from day one. I’ve dealt with people calling me slurs and names, telling me to kill myself, telling me they were going to kill me themselves, that I deserve awful unspeakable things, for not agreeing with the way that they interpret a fictional character. Those were all easy to ignore, because they were always, always either about my Jewishness, or about the Jewishness of my characters, and I have no time for bigots, I just don’t.  

People got angry with me for having boundaries in not wanting to write certain things, or for not wanting to write them in the specific way that they wanted me to. People got angry with me for being frustrated, that time and time again I was being treating as some writing machine and not a person, by them not giving me the basic respect of checking the small list of tropes and themes I’m uncomfortable writing which I’ve made so accessible every time. Time and time again I became frustrated, being asked questions that I’ve made clear on so many occasions, that I was uncomfortable answering, or held negative opinions of.

And that was frustrating, because it was a level of entitlement I’d never seen before – people wanted my writing, but only if it satisfied their needs with little regard to my own feelings, and called me a bully when I didn’t comply. Still, it was just about the writing, and I could ignore that.

But then, strangers started getting angry with me because I had blocked them for whatever reason from seeing my content. Strangers got angry with me for standing up for myself when people tried to pull stunts in the inbox. When people asked me for advice or my opinion on a whole assortment of topics, they said I was being a bully because they didn’t like what I had to say. A difference of opinion is not a personal attack, but it seems as though many people haven’t grasped that concept. People said I was betraying others’ trust by answering anonymous asks on the internet, something that has exactly 0 risk or stakes in sending. People said I was a bitch when I tried to offer genuinely constructive and critical responses. People got angry that I blocked their IP address for sending me unwanted, anonymous, negative hot takes that I didn’t ask for, nor that I cared about. People said I never took accountability for anything, when in reality they just wanted me to change my mind about certain topics, and got angry when I held true to my convictions. 

I hope you can all imagine why I didn’t respond pleasantly. Like every content creator on this website and on any website, we don’t owe anyone anything. I don’t owe anyone anything. I don’t owe anyone writing, I don’t owe anyone answers, I don’t owe anyone attention or time. And something that I’ve learned most of all, is that I don’t owe people the pleasure of indulging in flame wars that get brought to my feet. I am not interested in wasting my time trying to defend myself and my good name, against people who have already made up their mind about me from a few misunderstandings, a single interaction, or a one-sided and angry perspective. I’m not interested in wasting my time over things that I know in my heart, aren’t true.

One thing people sometimes tell me, is that I was “rude to a perfectly genuine anon.” I would like to say this; there is absolutely no way for me to know the intention of any anon, other than the way the message comes across. And I’ll be the first to admit, often intention is misinterpreted! When that happens and the person reaches out, I always, every time, have apologized. And just as easy as it is for me to misinterpret someone’s genuine ask as rude or offensive, it is easy for my genuine responses to be interpreted as rude or clipped. Tone is difficult over the internet -- tone is difficult in text where these people are anonymous strangers and I have no idea who they are or with which intentions they’re coming from. 

That being said, people can still say hurtful things without the intention of doing so. People have said unintentionally hurtful things to me, and I now realize that I have said things which have been hurtful to others. Good intentions mean nothing, when real hurt and pain is caused. To those people, I would like to give a genuine and sincere apology. I hope, as all I can ever do is hope, that folks here know I never come from a place of malice. Moving forward, I will do my best to respond in ways that I hope will come across as respectful as possible, even when disagreeing. I believe the only legitimate form of apology is changed behavior, and I intend to make that change so that this space can be more inclusive and welcoming, as I have only ever wished it to be. 

Because, well, I like to think that we have made a welcoming and inclusive space, a space where we are able to respect one another’s boundaries. I am just one person, just a girl with a blog on the internet who has tried to forge a community of peers and friends. I am not a politician with a PR team approving my every post, there are no mods here to help me interact with you guys. I’m just a girl who writes fanfic and posts it on the internet. I write fanfic that makes me happy, that I’m proud of, for me, and I am happy to share it with you. Especially because through that fanfic, I’ve met incredible wonderful people, and I’m thankful for all of you.

Through having this blog, I’ve met people that I consider to be lifelong friends -- people that I plan on building a future with, and for that I’m forever grateful. I’ve met people who have become inspired to write their own fanfic or start their own blogs, and even when it’s a subject matter that’s not something I’m interested in or one that I personally don’t like, I have always, always been encouraging. Because this is a hobby, this is something people should be doing for fun, because they want to, and no other reason. So when I see claims that “I’ve forced people to quit writing” or someone saying “I quit the fandom because of you”, I know that that’s simply not true. The only way you quit writing is by not writing anymore. It may feel better to blame someone for the reasons why, but no one can make you do anything except yourself. 

Similarly, I’ve seen people saying that I’ve “ruined their favorite character” and to that all I have to say is what I’ve always been saying; if you don’t like my writing, you don’t have to read it. If you don’t like my interpretation of characters, you don’t have to consume the content I put out. If you don’t like my opinions, you don’t have to follow me. People don’t “ruin characters” for anyone else, when you simply avoid the content you don’t like, and focus on (or make) the content you do like.

Have I been confused when someone shares my story with a tag that didn’t make sense and so I reached out to them privately to address the issue? Yes. 

Have I expressed my negative feelings about fics and the trends of fandom in the comfort and boundaries of my own blog, in posts that I remove when I felt that they no longer were worth keeping up? Yes.

Have I expressed my concerns regarding certain tropes, themes and kinks, opinions formed by my own firsthand experience with them, coupled with the potential damaging effects they may have on a young and impressionable audience like some of those in this fandom? Yes. 

I don’t deny any of these things, because I am not ashamed of any of these things. You don’t have to like it, but that does not make me a monster, nor does it make me a tormenter of this fandom as I have been called.

Tormenting people in fandom is making long scathing posts publicly blasting someone because you’re angry that they blocked you. Or making long public callout posts to warn others in the fandom of my many crimes – crimes which actually aren’t crimes at all – and whipping up a frenzy of frothing at the mouth hate. Or reblogging a post and hijacking it with long commentary about something that has nothing to do with you in an attempt to shame the original poster. Or getting screenshots of private conversations where someone is joking with a person who they once thought was a friend, that are taken out of context and framing them to fit a narrative you’re spinning against them. That’s torment.

This fandom has the most vicious and warped mob mentality that I have ever seen. I’ve seen it in the treatment of Adam and Joanne, I’ve seen it in the treatment of John Boyega and Kelly Marie Tran. I’ve seen it in the treatment of other bloggers, and well, I can say I’ve seen it and experienced it myself. I worry for the future of the fandom, when this sort of behavior is rewarded and celebrated, because people are so quick to simply agree with someone’s impassioned anger instead of thinking critically for themselves.

However (and this is the ‘but’ of the whole post), I cannot make this post and make all these statements without saying that this community has also been a place of kindness and support and acceptance, and I’m genuinely touched by everyone who has ever gone out of their way to talk to me. I thought long and hard about deleting this blog. I thought about just packing up and leaving our corner of the web, or moving to other platforms. I even put out a little announcement on my ao3 that I was done, I was out of here. But it didn’t sit right with me. It didn’t feel right to abandon all the incredibly beautiful, talented, welcoming, supportive and kind people that had found some peace in this corner of the web. I was absolutely blown away by the sweet messages that were sent to my inbox, and my DMs, the posts that were circulated written by friends and strangers alike literally brought me to tears. 

I know that many people here do not like me, and want nothing to do with me, and that’s okay. I know that my content is not for everyone, my opinions are not going to be lined up with everyone else’s, that’s okay too. People have not liked me from the beginning lol, that’s nothing new to me. I have always said, that I would continue to write even if no one read my stuff, and that’s still true. You are in charge of your internet experience, follow the people and consume the content that makes you happy, and block out the things that don’t. 

If you are reading this and you are one of the kind people, one of the supportive and understanding people who are on my side, I cannot say thank you enough. The time I took away made me realize that there are much larger problems in the world than strangers on the internet having negative opinions about me, and that kindness will always be more powerful than hate. The community we have built together means more to me than the bullshit other people try and start.

So, all of this is to say, that I’m back.

Some things are going to be a little different around here; I’m very very sorry I know I said I would never do this but I’ve turned the anonymous function off for the time being just for the sake of my sanity, and I’ve updated my FAQ. Writing will no longer be posted directly to tumblr, but rather a redirect link from AO3 will be posted making all tag-list requests null and void.

But other things will remain the same. We’re still going to have sleepovers, I’m still going to accept prompts (but please give me some time before we get back to sinday, as I’m still in a little bit of unease about all of this). I’m still going to be talking about my personal AU, and I’m still going to be uploading fanart and gifs and memes and shitposts and answering your questions and giving you the love you all have shown to me over the years.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you for giving me the time to say my peace. I know it’s a long post, but I’ve been sitting on these thoughts for quite some time, and I’m relieved to finally express them. Please know that my posting this isn’t intended to stir up anything, or cause any drama, or relive any pain. 

I just missed you all very dearly. I hope that we can move onward and upward together, a babbushka 2.0 of sorts. It’s an exciting time to be in this fandom, and I am looking forward to experiencing everything together.

I’m sending you all of my love. 

[lokis-omnistrose]

For My First Trick....er... Post!

I thought I would give a little info about me. Heads-up: If you dislike any of this, you can either put up with it or kindly find the door, because while I will happily entertain intelligent debate/ discussion, telling me I'm wrong for my beliefs (note I said "beliefs". Telling me I'm wrong because I'm misinformed and actively have my *facts* wrong is welcome and encouraged. See below for more) is bigoted, rude, and toxic and will not be entertained. Yes, I sound like a B**** for that, but hey, gotta be honest off the bat, right?

If you're interested in learning more about me...

- I'm Omnist, raised Roman Catholic. What does that mean? Well, it means I'm royally effed up lol. Really, though, it means I was raised in the RC tradition, so have a lot of RC beliefs ingrained in me. However, due to past traumas, you could say I 'lost my faith'. I started believing that I was being punished for something, then realised I had done nothing to be punished for, so wondered why I was being treated the way I was. I drifted away from RC, and gradually found Athena and Artemis and comfort. Over the years, I also discovered the Morrigan, along with multiple others, and found that I believed in multiple pantheons - aka Omnist (not devoted to a specific religion, but religious to a degree).

In recent months, I've started to find that more and more things have been guiding me toward Loki, and have accepted him as my chief male god (until recently, I only followed female gods, mainly a coincidence, but slightly intentional), though strangely, Thor and Odin followed. So yeah, I'm kinda mixed up lol.

- I believe strongly in the number 3. Maybe because of my Catholic upbringing, I feel a strong bond with the number 3 and 'holy trinities'. Triple Goddesses have always meant a lot to me, and I find it no coincidence or surprise that when Loki found me, Thor and Odin followed. My avatar symbol is actually the Triskelion/ Triskele, or a version of the triskeles, which is often used as a representative symbol for triple deities. I became somewhat obsessed with it years ago when I had recently become hooked on symbology, and it's been important to me ever since.

- My 'spirit animals' are wolves and ravens, the latter being most prominent. I've always been drawn to wolves for some reason, but ravens are ever-present in my life in one way or another. If you see me anywhere online, there's a solid chance I either have ravens in my username, avatar or character (skin or accessory), or some version of the word (other language, derivative, etc).

- I change hobbies faster than most people change underpants. Any day you ask, there's a good chance I've either picked up or dropped a hobby. It can be anything, from something as relatively normal as painting to something as relatively unusual as studying grammatical similarities between languages (yes, that's a real one that comes and goes).

- However, the ones that stay are singing, writing, music in general, Marvel/ some DC (yes, I cross the divide, though DC characters just don't interest me as much as a whole, however there are a few I adore), gaming - though I can't actually play video games often because of issues with my hands, crafting, paganism (both as a study and as a practice, to a degree), human rights and their history, mythology, the paranormal, cooking/ food, and herbology.

- I'm Pansexual, but grey-ace. Basically, that means I can be attracted to anyone, regardless of gender, but sexual attraction isn't something I experience on a regular basis. I can go from 'I'mma jump him/ her/ them before long' to 'make me think about sex again and I will throw up' (no exaggeration there). As a result, relationships can be a minefield for me because I desperately want to give love to people, but my drive is about as unpredictable as lightning, so I'm always afraid I'm gonna disappoint whoever I'm with by not being 'enough'. I get the feeling that's likely a common feeling for people like me, so I seek to be open and share with people, because ours isn't a very commonly heard perspective.

- I do not accept bullying. Whether it be of me or of anyone on my blog, anyone I see being bullied online, or (if I feel I can safely step in) irl, I will put a stop to it, or at least try. I've been there, and I know how much it can mess you up for life if it's persistent, and I am not about to stand by and let someone be picked on. If you pick on someone in my comments, prepare to be blocked and/ or named and shamed, and if you send an abusive/ bullying ask, you will receive the same. If anonymous, I may highlight it to show what an immature blockhead you are, but I'm not going to stoop to being abusive. You will be taken down, but I will do so by pointing out every flaw in your ask, not by stooping to your level.

- I welcome everyone, as long as you're nice. Got a question? Go right ahead and ask! Got a suggestion! Lemme know! Wanna be friends? 100%! (though don't expect me to reliably message back and forth because my memory is so crap, I can't guarantee that. I've never had many friends and I'm very introverted, so friendship is not something i'm all that smart about lol).

- I read a crapton of fanfic. Literally most of my followed accounts are fanfic because they inspire me for my own. I don't mean that in the sense that I poach ideas, but more that they help me get back into the groove of wanting to write, and then ideas start moving again. I'll read about a character falling off a wall and suddenly a character I had lost my mojo for will go 'that's a dumb thing to do. Why didn't they just stand against the railing?' and I'll be back in the right mindset to write for them again about the flu I got halfway through writing and got stuck on.

- I write a crapton of fanfic that never gets posted. I literally have well over 100 stories in progress. Most are Marvel, BTS or The Walking Dead, but there are others, and I have more ideas in my head. I have posted some on another account on here (and hey, you may even know me from there, but shhhhh), but most of it is just idle writing that I write for the sake of it, with no real intention to ever post. I don't do it for an audience, but for something to do and to work out my past (and present) issues, so it's common for a story to have elements of abuse or the like which I don't often like to subject people to, so don't bother posting. Not to mention, they never get finished. I have a bit of an unintentional policy that I don't finish stories, because you never know when you'll have another idea for them. That's also why I have some stories with up to 5 different versions. I'll write one scene, but there'll be 5 different ways it could go, so I just write all 5 and go from there.

That's all I can think of for now, but this'll be added to as I think of more, so I'll post if I update this, so people know (if anyone's following). Bye for now, lovelies!

[rudystree]

i reread your response and i am in no way trying to taint your blog with hate. i did take offense to the “what are you trying to prove” tag, because my intersecting identity places me in a variety of minority groups and i do have personal experience with a lot of the things i mentioned. still, you seem like a kind person and i’ve seen you post about Palestine and such on your blog so i do apologize for coming off as rude or too strong. i do want to have a genuine conversation with you- not even to try to prove my point but because you do seem like an educated person and i value talking about this sort of stuff. i do understand you not wanting to do that on your blog (and i apologize again for my initial ask) but i unfortunately cannot come off of anon for personal reasons. and no, it has nothing to do with me being scared or not being confident in what i have to say. however this is your blog and i understand if you do not wish to have this conversation outside of direct messaging, but would it work if i didn’t mention any of the casts name and kept everything hypothetical? as in, again no mentioning names or anything direct that could link the ask to the cast, just talking about the situation?

okay thank you for sending this! i’m sorry too if i came off as rude, when i received your initial ask it came at the same time as a lot of insults from other anons so i couldn’t distinguish.

i wrote “what are you trying to prove” because i’m not arguing about whether the cast has done problematic shit but rather that dehumanizing and bullying them is not okay or constructive and i don’t understand how anyone could disagree with that. the comments chase, elaine, etc. made were from years ago, and they apologized and have not made any similar remarks since. the same can’t be said about the “fans” wishing them dead and proudly insulting them on the daily. it just isn’t comparable in the slightest.

i am genuinely sorry if their past actions offended you, and i think that they all could’ve handled the aftermath better and offered better apologies. i’m in no position to tell you what you should or shouldn’t be offended by. i’m also not asking anyone to like them or to accept their apologies. however, i will continue to defend them as i personally have no reason to believe that those actions reflect who they are today. i believe these issues are very important to discuss as well, but i also believe in personal growth and education. the entire cast and elaine is outspoken in their support for minority communities. i don’t believe they deserve to be vilified and harassed until the end of time. and also- this isn’t a social justice blog. this is my escapism from the real world and i don’t want to waste energy on arguing what is and isn’t considered problematic.

now here’s the problem with the anon thing. i’m more than happy to chat about the cast and hear you out and give you my thoughts! your feelings are totally valid and i don’t want to dismiss them. but this topic is already beaten to death. there’s just not much more i can say from my end that i haven’t already discussed with people on this blog for months. i don’t want to be repetitive or reignite the fire. if i respond to your anonymous ask, other people will jump in and it’s just chaos again. i also won’t be able to know if asks are from you or from those who are just trying to troll me.

at the same time, i understand why you want to stay off anon. that’s fine and you can send me anything but i might just not respond if it’s something i’ve already posted about in detail in my #elaine chats tag. i also won’t respond to messages that are name-calling, mocking, insulting, or otherwise degrading cast members, including calling them racist or transphobic or whatnot. those are serious allegations and not something i want people to throw around casually. besides i very much don’t agree with labeling them as such.

so please by all means, feel free to share on anon any thoughts you may have, if it’s respectful i will want to talk about it too. 💛 up to you if you want to name the cast or not! but i would also invite you to read through all my previous responses to other people first, because i won’t repeat myself forever and i promise it’s nothing personal.

[bamby0304]

Idk if you have realized but there’s a group that consists of you and a few other women who kinda rule the spn fanfic community in the way that y’all just kind stuck together and not really let newcomers in. It sucks what’s happening to your friend and people are dicks but the way you guys all jump on the MINOR, and are being complete assholes is just rude. I get she was a bitch, but a whole bunch of grown ass women jumping on a minor is just real low. Just saying.

2/2 And I’m in now defending the bully, not at all. That is absolutely messed. I just think that there is probably a better way to address the issue, maybe more privately or one person rather than your whole group publicly. And whether or not you let the person remain anonymous, they will still see it. She’s a bitch, yes, but having a bunch of adult women jump on her probably isn’t the best way to handle the situation. Sorry if I offended you, I just needed to say this. 

I don’t ‘control’ any factor of the spn fandom except for myself and my blog.

The person wasn’t even in the spn fandom.

If I didn’t let new comers in, I wouldn’t have the friends I do.

I CAN JUMP ON MINORS BECAUSE IT’S MY BLOG, AND MY CHOICE. I DON’T WANT CHILDREN ON MY BLOG. I DON’T WANT CHILDREN READING MY FICS. I DON’T WANT CHILDREN HAVING ACCESS TO THE EXPLICIT RAPE, SMUT AND VIOLENT STUFF I WRITE.

I’m not being an asshole. Well... I wasn’t... I’m about to be.

If someone wants to fake messages and tell others that someone is saying they’re cutting themselves and stalking them, when it’s all lies, they deserve to be called out. When people are ganging up on another for no reason, they deserve to be called out. When they can’t produce evidence proving everything they’ve accused, the deserve to be called out. When they cause someone to delete their blog and fall into a dangerous mental health hole, THEY DESERVE TO BE CALLED OUT.

Lying about your age is so fucking uncool. Then lashing out because the adults don’t want to deal with your childish and immature ass, is so fucking uncool.

I did not jump on the minor. Fuck I wanted to. I wanted to blast all those whiny bitches with hate. I wanted to give them the time fucking out they fucking deserve and need. But I didn’t. ALL I DID WAS SEND OUT A WARNING TO OTHER WRITERS WHO ACCEPT REQUESTS AND COMMISSIONS.

How am I supposed to send the details to every write?? I’ve got people coming to me from all kinds of fandoms now, asking for the url to block them. And fuck yes I’ll hand it over. Why?? Because they have a right to know who might screw them over. Am I aware of the risks that come with sharing this person’s name?? Obviously. Do I care?? Mostly not. If someone wants to be a cunt then they should deal with the consequences of their actions.

Also, prepared to be blocked. You wanna try and call me out, make me feel like shit, stir the pot?? Buh-bye.

[snibnoom]

bashing idols... would you say it to their face? if you wouldn’t, then keep it to yourself. even if you would, keep it to yourself. nobody needs your negativity. something you claim to be an “opinion” is really just bullying. don’t comment on their weight. don’t comment on their skin color. don’t comment on their activity or lack thereof or their hair or their outfit. can it be fixed in 5 minutes if you got the chance to tell them? no? then keep it to yourself.

why is it so hard for people to just be decent? what if someone said all the nasty things you’ve said back to you? how would that make you feel? now imagine a horde of people saying these things to you, about you every day for years. that’s what idols go through.

don’t give me that “they’ll never see it” shit either. most idols have some level of english skill. there are translators built into twitter, and it takes 5 seconds to copy and paste it into an actual translator. they know how to use sns. they can look up their names, their group name. chances are if they see something that looks similar repeated over and over again or see a flood of activity all the sudden, they’re going to try and find out what it means. don’t you, when you see the same phrase or hear your idols repeat some in-joke over and over, try to get a translation of it? this hate springs up in bouts. i promise they see the patterns.

and even if they don’t see it, you still shouldn’t say it. you reflect badly on the other decent fans around you and you reflect badly on the idol. it will likely not only affect someone’s view of you as a person, but also affect their view of whatever group your icon is in if they see it over and over. when you’re online as a fan, you’re not just you. you represent an entire fandom whether you want to or not. have a lot of followers? you definitely represent the fandom and you need to take your words into account before you tweet or post or whatever it is you do.

and all of this goes for talking to other fans, too. if you wouldn’t say it to their face, don’t say it at all. be prepared to own up to what you say because things have a habit of getting out. maybe they have a different opinion than you do. maybe they disagree with you on some stuff. that doesn’t make them a bad person worthy of anonymous hate messages. just because they have a different opinion from you doesn’t mean they’re the spawn of satan. it probably just means they grew up different from you, in a different area around different friends and different parents with a different mind than you. differing opinions are no reason to send someone hate. don’t like them as a person? guess what. you can block people. revolutionary, i know.

there’s a difference between having an opinion and being rude. find out the difference and watch your words, because one post can have a lot more impact than you think.

[thenightling]

Hey, so I can appreciate that fandom discourse can get frustrating, but it does hurt me to see a friend I treasure being called certain things. May I ask that you try and keep it civil? If there's a problem, it's easy to clear it up over messenger. We all have different opinions but hopefully we can still respect each other. I'm sorry to hear about the anons - nobody deserves that. There's Tumblr hit-tracking tools out there which can help you see where they're coming from in future =).

I appreciate your civility and you have the right to know that I strongly suspect your friend was sending me very hateful anonymous messages for days all because I dislike The Dreaming spin-off comics and outside of those anonymous messages her most recent open reply to me was accusing me of being Transphobic, misogynistic, superficial and other hateful terms, among other things.

The evidence is there in her “points.”   The wording used is virtually identical to the hateful anonymous messages attacking me and telling me that I was calling the author “as bad as her oppressors.”   

What your friend and certain others on Tumblr need to grasp is that being Trans doesn’t automatically make someone non-Transphobic.  There are plenty of ways Trans people deal with Transphobia within the Trans specific community.  

There are gate keepers who insist you need to get the surgery to be a true Trans.  You even see Passive-Aggressive behaviors about this when they’re being critical of the character Wanda from Sandman simply because she was afraid of the surgery and therefor (according to these specific hateful elements) “not really Trans.”

You even see it on the DC Wikia page for Echo (the character your friend was defending) by the repeated statements in the wikia page saying “She was really a man before she became a nightmare!” (No, if she was always a woman deep down inside she was always a woman.  That’s the truth of it). 

And the one bit of potential Transphobia in The Dreaming that your friend can’t seem to get her mind around and accept the probability of, while ironically calling me Transphobic, is the fact that The Dreaming, despite being pro-Trans Woman -more or less- (See what I said there about Echo) you will find content that at least one Trans male has been uncomfortable with, and that is Nuala happily going back under a glamour.

The simple fact is someone can be pro Trans Woman while being anti Trans Man.  As weird as that may sound, that mindset does exist.  And I am afraid that may exist in The Dreaming comics.  I could be misreading it but that is how it appears to me.  

There’s actually a lot of apparent misandry in The Dreaming, including how the Corinthian is written, coming off anti-Woman when there was no indication he was like that in the original comics, he just preferred men, as lovers and victims.   And Cain (in the Book of Dreams) using words like “Bitch” in jarring places, where he sounds more like Freddy Krueger than his usual Vincent Price-esque self.  Can you really imagine someone whose vocal patterns and mannerisms were modeled after Vincent Price shouting “Get on, Bitch!” to Nuala?    

I have explained the symbolic significance of Nuala and her glamour, and how I and some others have seen it, as best I can, but your friend not only refused to accept my opinion but harassed me over it.   I compared it to someone willingly going back into the closet and even used non-sexual comparisons- anyone defying their cultural expectations but then conforming to them later “But this time it’s their choice so it’s empowering!”    

I’ll use a religious comparison.  A dissatisfied Catholic finds her true beliefs in Wicca but later the browbeating and the fact that everyone else around her is Catholic gets the better of her, so she goes back to “the fold” and treats the religion that she actually felt at peace with is now “evil.”

But your friend keeps claiming “Nuala is more than her appearance!” making it clear that she refuses to even consider the metaphorical implications.   And it’s rather rude.   Not only that but in her latest bullet points she decided that to dislike Nuala hiding herself under a glamour is “misogynistic”  

And honestly, this was the last straw.   

I had to shut off the Anonymous feature because of messages received,  that use her exact same wording, her exact same attempted defenses of the author, Echo, and Nuala.   And I’ll be perfectly blunt, even if that was a coincidence and somehow those anonymous messages were not her, there aren’t that many people who liked or even heard of The Dreaming comics.  That’s why DC doesn’t sell them in trade paperback form and ignores most of the events of those comics and also why characters like Echo have never appeared outside The Dreaming.  So the probability of it not being your friend greatly diminishes in my mind.  I acknowledge that there is a chance it was not her, but the chance that it was her is too great for me to to be willing to take the chance.  

Rest assured I will not unleash my anger on your friend again for her bullying replies to my opinion but she also needs to learn to be respectful of the opinion of others without turning it into self-righteous social accusations (and this has nothing to do with my suspecting the anonymous person is her.  This has to do with her final open reply to me).   For this reason I have blocked her.  

[storysims]

I have been sitting on these for forever, y’all. Tons of text under the cut!

@dangerous-stain-builds replied to your photoset: Same. I’m in my first winter! That’s so exciting! I started over recently, so I’m still in Spring. Once multiplayer comes out, we’ll have to play together!  ♡

@simmering-pancakes replied to your post “why are you such a bitch?”:  I'm coming for this persons mother fucking wig! 😡 Molly you are a scholar and a gentleman Jenny, I adore you so much! Leave their wig, bb. That’s what they want!

@calisimgirl replied to your post “why are you such a bitch?”: Wow.. you are one of the sweetest people I have met on here! Nonny is seriously delusional. You are the best ♡♡♡ Thank you so much, Sara! ♡ You’re kind of the best, so thanks for being so sweet!

@riverstonesims replied to your post “why are you such a bitch?”: I'm totally with you @pxlunicorns. Coming at someone via their Tumblr is just immature and stupid. Grow a pair, move on or privately message off anon on discord or here. Hiding behind anonymity doesn't do you any favours. So grow a pair ya muppet or keep ya zipper quiet. ✌️ Molly don't listen to them, you're amazing and I'm so glad I've met you. Keep smiling lovely 💛💛 My lovely Gavino, my twin separated at birth, my sweet Caroline. I adore you more than words could say, bb! Thank you~

@pinkcotton replied to your post “why are you such a bitch?”: Wtf? Your one of the best people on here! Love you Molly ❤️ Thank you, Melody! I’m so glad you’re back, I’m sorry you had to return to such nastiness on your dash.♡

@madeyesims replied to your post “why are you such a bitch?”: I realized I liked this post, which was a little weird. I was liking it to agree with all the comments other people have said, to be clear. Love you, brub. <3 I love you too, brub. ♡  I knew what your like meant!

@pxlunicorns​ replied to your post “why are you such a bitch?”: Normally, I don’t get in the middle of things like this, I am all about anti-drama but seeing as how this was sent to literally the sweetest most kind person on here, I have some issues. COME ON. Grow up. I have a feeling this is coming from someone on a discord server, because of multiple reasons. If you have an issue with a fellow mod and can't declare that in a grown and civil manner. Please refrain from doing it on their tumblr. This is a form of bullying and that is just unacceptable.      I love you with my whole heart, darling wifey. Thank you for being willing to do battle with rude people for lil ol me.

@simalienn​​ replied to your post “why are you such a bitch?”: I was just thinking the same thing, @ohthesefaces​... I hope anon feels better about themselves now.. 🙄   MOLLY I LOVE YOU!!!! 💙💙💙 LEISHA I LOVE YOU TOO!

@ohthesefaces replied to your post “why are you such a bitch?”: Wow, anon hate! How mature and becoming! It must be awful for them to live a life so obsessed with starting needless drama every time they don't get along with someone. Jamie... I love you. Haha. More than words can say. Thanks for being a force to be reckoned with, bb.

@bugsims replied to your photoset “All things considered… It’s not the best family dinner they’ve ever...” :  no smoking at the table Children these days, amirite? They never listen!

@ohthesefaces replied to your post “List 5 facts about your most favorite sim of yours and send this to 10...” : YAYAYAY!!! OMG LEXXXX!! My fave. i love her so much. im so excitedddd. omg so glad you answered it for her! OF COURSE! I was so excited you answered mine for Benji! Our bbs are going to make the cutest little beans.

@jessmarlana replied to your post “List 5 facts about your most favorite sim of yours and send this to 10...” : This exact thing happened to me! My founder was done, had his three children with his heir being the middle child. Than boom! 7 days before he jumps into elder mode, Senior Pollination Technician #3 jumps his bones, and out comes blue baby Taylor. But the thing is, both his eldest daughter, his son, and his wife get abducted from the same spot, and on a lot across the street. Alien zone? Mayyyyybe. That is so cute! Sounds exactly like my second generation. So many alien abductions! I still cringe every time one of my sims gets out of bed in the middle of the night. Haha

There’s more... Particularly from @pxlunicorns, @ohthesefaces, @simalienn, @riverstonesims. But if I sat here and made a post for all of your replies, I would never do anything else. ♡ I love y’all!

[kaisoo-anti-blacklist-blog]

F.A.Q

Welcome to the Kaisoo Anti Blacklist F.A.Q! In this post I will answer the most popular questions about this blog and how it will function. Please read the information below before sending me any asks. If you have read the following in its entirety and have any additional questions feel free to send me a dm or an ask and I will be happy to answer them! ^.^

Q:What is the main goal/purpose of this blog? The purpose of this blog is to protect both new and old Kaisoo shippers and supporters on tumblr from bullying and harassment as well as weed out all the fake kaisoo supporters. A lot of times those who ship kaisoo endure various forms of harrassment which makes it difficult to enjoy and support kaisoo peacefully. By compiling toxic antis into one database, it makes it easier to decide who to avoid/block.

Q: What is a 'Kaisoo Anti'? A Kaisoo anti is a person who: -Is against the idea of shipping/supporting Kaisoo   -Mocks, bullies and harasses those that do -Uses kaisoo for their own popularity but does not actually support/like them and/or the shippers, i.e a “Fake shipper” A lot of times they are seen telling supporters to "stop fetishing gay couples" and assume that most shippers and supporters are "fetishizing two men" "delusional" or straight white b*tches". They target only kaisoo supporters and shippers, regardless of all the other pairings that exist in Kpop. Q: What is a fake shipper? A fake shipper is someone who appears to like/support kaisoo but says rude things to/about shippers and/or about Jongin and/or Kyungsoo themselves. Many times these people gif kaisoo, write fanfics with kaisoo as the main pairing and create kaisoo fanart, but when asked if they ship kaisoo they say "Yeah, but Im not delulu like other shippers". In other situations the person is an anti of either Jongin, Kyungsoo, or both, yet still appears to "ship" kaisoo.

Q: What do you consider to be bullying/harrassment? If you are receiving unwarranted abuse from an Anti because you ship/support Kaisoo, that is bullying and harassment. It includes (but is not limited to): -Using threatening language (i.e. "Go choke", "Die" "kill yourself" "I want to kill all shippers" etc.) -Using ableist language (i.e. "Youre dumb" "You all are idiots" "Retards") -Using racist language (i.e. "white b*tch" "Black kaisoo shippers r in the sunken place") -Insults (i.e "youre so gross" "disgusting" "trash" "b*tch") -Mockery and the use of copypasta with kaisoo related posts -False accusations of fetishization And so on. These are the most common forms of bullying among antis. Bullying comes in many different forms but this is just a general idea of what I consider to fit the definition. Q: I have some receipts Id like to submit, but I want to remain anonymous. Is that possible? Yes! All kaisoo supporters who send receipts, whether the bullying was directed toward they themselves or another kaisoo supporter, will remain anonymous. The only names that will be shown are those doing the bullying/harassing. Keep in mind that, with the intuitiveness of those on the internet, it still may be possible for your identity to be revealed if, for example, someone were to figure out it was a certain user partaking in discourse. If this is to happen, just know that my blog would not be behind this. All identities are guaranteed to remain anonymous, minus those of the antis. ^.^ Q: I have some receipts Id like to submit, but I DONT want to be anonymous. While the bravery is noble, unfortunately I will refuse your request to not be anonymous. This is a space created to protect shippers and supporters and help them to feel like they can enjoy kaisoo happily. If you would rather have your identity revealed I encourage you to take matters into your own hands and message your bully directly. :) Q: The person I want to submit is not a tumblr user, but are well known among kaisoo shippers for being an anti/fake shipper. Can I still submit their name? Weeding out antis mainly on tumblr is what I'd like to focus on, but feel free to submit names of other well known antis and they could still be posted depending on the circumstances. Q: When will my submission be posted? Will I be personally notified? Because I am running this blog alone and need time to look through receipts and confirm information, submissions will be posted every Tuesday and Thursday. Due to the large amounts that may be received, personal notification will not be possible. Please continue to check the blog to see if your submission has been posted! Q: I submitted receipts about someone a while ago, and they were never posted. Why? Before submitting, always be sure to check that your receipts fall within the "Submission Guidelines". It is important that there is clear and true evidence of bullying, harrassment or means of fake shipping. Read the submission guidlines here. Q: I dont have receipts about this particular person but know from past experience that they are an anti. Can I still submit their name? Feel free to still submit their name! I can always do research and if I find clear evidence of them being an anti  they will be posted to the blog. Q: I am being bullied/harassed by a fellow kaisoo supporter. What should I do? As long as you are also a kaisoo supporter and your submission falls within the guidelines, send away! Q: How do I know I can trust you enough to keep me anonymous? I am also a Kaisoo supporter that has endured lots of bullying and harassment as well as seeing it from others, so I would never want a fellow supporter to have to go through this. I am all about protecting everyone and weeding out these abusive people who have nothing better to do. But if this is not means enough to trust me, feel free to use the Anonymous asks instead and they will be published this way. Keep in mind that evidence is needed before posting someone as an anti on the blog, and usually that evidence can be sent a lot easier through messaging rather than asks, but because I want all supporters to feel comfortable with me, I will allow asks as well. :) Q: Isnt it a bit hypocritical to call out all these people on a dummy blog? Why not reveal your identity? The reason that I am staying anonymous is because I need to be able to go back and look at the evidence of bullying and harassment myself to confirm it and share it on this blog. Most antis response to this blog will be to block me from seeing what they post, and if I reveal my personal blog (and my third invisible blog) then I will have no way of confirming what is truly going on. This is also why being sure that your receipts fall in line with the guidelines is also crucial. In the event that antis have blocked me from all 3 blogs, I will have only your receipts to go off of. Of course I trust my fellow supporters, but as someone trying to do the right thing I must always make sure Ive got a the facts/proof. Q:This is a website where anyone can post what they want. Why make a page like this when supporters can just block antis? Supporters can indeed block the antis as they come to them. But by compiling a list of all of the most common antis into one place like this, it helps older and newer kaisoo supporters know who to block before the bullying begins. Think of it as staying one step ahead. Q: Arent you worried about this creating more drama and starting a war? This seems so unnecessary...its just shipping! It may create drama with me and the antis themselves but Im sure that most shippers/supporters just want to be able to go in the tag and talk about Kaisoo in peace. I feel that this is long over-due, however I will reconsider keeping the blog if the majority of supporters oppose to it. Q: Some of the people featured here are well known artists/fanfic writers. Their reputation is ruined! Keep in mind that if they are featured on this blog it means that they were harassing or bullying someone solely for shipping/supporting kaisoo, or that they are a fake shipper/supporter. I did not ruin their reputation, they did. Q: I feel that my name should not be on the blog and that there was a misunderstanding. I want it removed! Sometimes intentions are lost or misinterpreted. If you feel that you are on this blog in error, feel free to send me a DM and we can discuss it. If you can supply solid and clear proof that you werent bullying/harassing a supporter or that you arent a fake supporter, your name will be removed immediately. Q: I support/ship a different couple and am being bullied/harassed for it. Am I able to submit receipts? While I have nothing against other ships and understand that other pairings come with antis as well, I mainly want to focus on Kaisoo related antis as I myself support Kaisoo and considering how kaisoo supporters receive the largest amount of hate and bullying. -----> I hope that I have answered most of the questions you all have about this blog! If you have additional questions or concerns, feel free to drop a private message to me anytime. :) -Admin X

[mamboloa-blog]

Look I just wanted a cool place to share screenshots and find CC and talk about a fucking video game. I didn’t know I was getting into one of those horror stories you hear about tumblr dogpiles and suicide baiting but here I am.

I thought a discord server sounded cool so I joined. Less than an hour later I was contacted by an admin who at first came off as extremely passive aggressive about me not filling out some form, who must have then misinterpreted my response because they immediately got aggressive and pushy about the fucking form and started making veiled threats. I argued back, realized that the server wasn’t the kind of place I wanted to be with people like that running it and told them no thanks. They banned me less than an hour after I had joined, before I had gotten the chance to post anything, cutting off any further contact with them or the other mod who had contacted me for the same information, in a much more reasonable tone.

I do not regret that callout post. Everything in it was true and I provided receipts. The response was, at first, gaslighting. Trying to convince me that the word “chill” is somehow aggressive and that thinly veiled threats, aren’t.

Then the admin I disagreed with contacted me here with the same old shit. That I was being rude, and that it was a unanimous decision to ban me among all the admins because I was obviously a horrible person who shouldn’t be there.

The thing about it being a unanimous decision seemed to be a lie because another admin who contacted me (and many did, apparently the callout post triggered some kind of panic) seemed not to know that I had been banned and asked me why I didn’t continue talked to the admins and sorting things out. Which I could not. As I no longer shared a common discord server with them.

Another admin who contacted told me the reason for the weird spreadsheet. That another admin had had a panic attack about strangers entering the (open, public) discord server and the rule was put in place, poorly enforced. A better way to do this would be what many discord servers do and restrict viewing and posting rights to only people who had done whatever signup process was required, which would have forced people to fill out the form if they wanted to do anything but read the channel where the form and instructions were posted. This also wouldn’t put the pressure on new users to fill out the form as soon as possible and the admins to herang them until they did.

And through all of this, I have received many non-apologies (”I’m sorry you were offended”) from quite a few of the server’s admins. All laced with yet more passive-agression. All “sweetie” and smiley faces. The one I got from the server’s owner offered to let me back into the server if I wanted, and also offered a “polite” suggestion that, while I had every right to post whatever I liked on my blog, I also had the choice to take the callout post down. If I wanted, that is. The implication of this message that I saw, was that the offer to rejoin the server hinged on my deleting the post. I told them where they could shove their discord server and threatened that if they ever tried to pull that manipulative shit with me again, I would make sure that callout post ended up on more trafficked places than my tumblr. And by then I had a couple of things to add to it.

After that, the owner made a final reply to my callout post, telling me that I was never welcome in their server (more gaslighting) because I was a mean and horrible person blah blah blah and that the request to delete my post wasn’t a request but just a “suggesting” (even more gaslighting).

And you know what the worst thing all of these people could even accuse me of was? That I called them names. Which I did. And because of that, I am the type of toxic person who the spreadsheet was designed to keep out and was always designed to keep out DESPITE THE FACT that I was offered to be let back into the server MINUTES earlier. And when I called you out on the bullying and the manipulation, all you did was turn it around back on me. Because I called you names. I even had one poorly spelled message in my ask box threatening to get the tumblr staff involved because I was apparently the one doing the bullying and harassment.

And I don’t know who has been sending me “anonymous” messages over tumblr’s IM or my site’s contact email using what I guess are dummy(?) accounts because I had my ask box turned off until just recently. I don’t even know if it’s one or more than one person. I don’t care. In less than twelve hours I’ve been suicide baited 7 times. My phone hasn’t stopped buzzing with new and interesting suggestions on how to end my life. I don’t even know if they’re any of the people involved in this whole mess or just some sycophantic hangers on. But enough is fucking enough. Since when trying was to get someone to commit suicide an okay thing to do? What kind of fucked up ass moral compass do you have to have to do something like that? Who the fuck hurt you?

And for what? An argument I had with a friend of yours? A discord server? A discord server dedicated to a dollhouse game for children? What is wrong with you people?

That being said, I have gotten quite a few lovely messages over IM and from people who I shared this experience with on Twitter. And I’d like to thank everyone who sent them for at least trying to keep me sane and reassure me.

But, in all of this, I never received an apology from the admin who aggressively insisted that I drop everything I was doing in real life and then acted threateningly when I needed time. And that’s the kicker. None of you were ever fucking sorry. No one ever admitted fault. At least not to myself. The original admin admitted on their blog “that they handled the situation poorly” but never actually apologized to me. You wanted the receipts taken down silently because they made you and your friends look bad.

And you know what, I’m done. It’s been a great night and I learned a lot about what kind of community this is. And it is absolutely not one that I want to be a part of. From wanting to share screenshots to this abortion of a nightmare. I’m out. A lot of the people behind this harassment were people I followed and really liked up until today, even if I’d never interacted with them. But under all the pretty screenshots and recolors you are all fucking jokes of human beings.

And to anyone who sent out the kind of threats, suicide and hate mail that I got tonight, - and not just to myself, as I know the admin who started all of this has apparently been getting some shit too - y’all are fucking monsters at best. At worst, attempted murderers. I hope we all live in a just world because cunts like you need to get what’s coming to you.

Good fucking bye, simblr. May you all continue tearing each other to shreds over a children’s game.

And fuck you, too.

[zacfaq]

PLEASE DON’T SEND ME “PASS IT ON” MESSAGES !! as sweet as some of they are they can be really annoying. i don’t check my PMs here! if you need to get ahold of me either send me an ask, or email me.

apparently necessary reminder: google exists! i’m not a know-it-all source, honestly i shouldn’t even be your second plan after google unless it’s a question specifically based on me or something relating to me

i try to avoid fandom drama as much as possible and keep a generally positive space, so please don’t come and ask me about stuff like that. thanks. 

if you want to commission me please send an email to zacharyjackbaron@gmail.com. do not email me through this address if your intentions are purely social and not work related

-what do you use to record and edit your speedpaints?

i use OBS to record, and edit in sony vegas

-what do you use to draw?

huion gt-191 and clip studio paint

-what are your pen settings?

just the default settings. all my custom stuff/things i’ve downloaded from CSP assets are just things i think look neat but probably never end up using. 

-a blog called papersans is claiming to be you! are they a thief?

that’s literally me, i use it to archive my art so i can find stuff easier without having to hunt through my tag. also available for people who just want to see my art n not my other posts

-when is your birthday?

february 6th!

-what is your sexuality?

gay. i like men.

-how long does it take you to draw?

idk like. awhile? sometimes 45 minutes sometimes four hours sometimes a week. 

-can i draw you/your ocs?

of course! pls show me after it would make me very happy !!!!! 

-favourite band/singer/musician?

i don’t know a damn thing about myself here’s a spotify playlist

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Zk5o5g7nMnGt0vrJVEcDq?si=7cd248a0b64046ee

-will you do art for cheap/free?

nah. art is currently the only job/income i have, if ur interested in commissioning me you can either find my prices on like, any of my pages, but if not ur more than welcome to email me @ zacharyjackbaron@gmail.com and i can give you prices there !! -(venting or something involving abuse, suicidal thoughts, self harm, bullying, eating disorders, or other similar things in real life situations. even in fiction i’m iffy.)

i hate to sound rude or not be of help, but please don’t send these messages to me. they send me into horrible anxiety  for several personal reasons. if you’re having such negative thoughts i implore you to speak to someone you trust without an anonymous mask, or do your best to seek help from a professional. i have my own things to worry about and as much as i’d like to help, i simply can’t.

-(asking for advice that isn’t related to art)

i would love to help but i’m not an ~all knowing source~. i can’t give you tips for school. i can’t give you tips for life. not only will i probably not know a solution for you but there’s likely a chance i’m in just as bad a situation as you/going through the same problem, as silent as i am about my personal life. also don’t use ‘asking for advice’ as an excuse to vent about things or to send me a paragraph describing in depth something listed above/that’s potentially triggering. thank you.

even if you’re looking fr art tips i’m not a great source i’m still learning, ur best bet is looking for already existing sources and reading through those bc i don’t preach the word of Art God. i’m also awful at explaining things

-why didn’t you answer my ask?

Main reason is i’m just really really bad at socializing, so it’s not anything on u. i’m almost always low on energy and when i do talk to people it wears me out really quick. i’m also just. not gr8 at talking in general so if i can’t think of a reply i tend to just leave things n then end up forgetting about them

-how do you draw [blank]?

honestly my art style is such a fucked up thing that’s so personalized to my own use i can’t do or make tutorials. the best i can do is direct you to my youtube.

-can we do an art trade?

sorry, i’ll have to say no. i’m not necessarily busy but i get stressed very easily, so i try to keep my art to either personal stuff or work ! if you would like art from me, please considering commissioning me! mutuals and friends may be the exceptions here if they catch me at a good time or we make plans well ahead to do smth when we’re both free to work on stuff

-can we be friends?

please don’t ask this. i’m awful enough at socialization as is and i just don’t fit well with most personality types. not to mention this is just overall a bad question. it backs the person being asked into a corner where they either have to say “yes” and end up in a friendship that actually isn’t working out and is maybe only good for one side bc they’re getting any and all of the benefits, and if they say “no” they look like a total dick bag and come across as an ass. don’t ask this question. it’s not how socializing works. it’s not how friendships work. thanks. -can you tag [blank]? unfortunately i’ve been a real bad place in terms of memory so i can’t tag tons and tons of things. i try and tag more general/basic things but i’m sorry i’ll have to pass on specifics. if i post or reblog things that trigger u or harm you it might be best to unfollow for ur own safety!! very sorry

if it’s specific words you’d like tagged please consider blacklisting the word itself. 

-how tall are you?

i’m 5'11".

-can you promo me?

i’d rather not, doesn’t sit well with me. if you have a commission post you want me to reblog i’m happy to! but i won’t just do text based handouts, y’know? not a fan of being used for visibility for no reason, and chances are if i do it for one person it’ll happen with hundreds of others and i don’t want my blog to turn into a free advertisement zone that just floods peoples’ feeds with promotions.

-you reblogged something from someone extremely problematic/unsafe

thank you for letting me know! tell me what it is they did, even better offer proof on it. i’ll likely delete the post and blacklist their url to hopefully prevent their name popping up on my blog in the future. i won’t publish these asks mostly to avoid discourse or in the event false information is provided. sorta just safety precaution i guess

-you’ve done something bad

again, thank you for letting me know! if i post or say something questionable please feel free to message me and i’ll try my best to address the issue and adjust accordingly. i’m aiming to grow as a person so critique is welcome, both on me and my artwork. don’t just come up and call me an asshole or a prick or something, actually point out the errors and explain why they’re wrong so i can better understand and it doesn’t just turn into a defensive round of who’s worse, because i tend to be a very defensive person.

-i think someone is stealing/reposting your art!

thank you very much for telling me! don’t message them right off the bat, come to me first and i will deal with it. i’ve dealt with this shit tons of times and it’s tiring as fuck but i’d rather repeat the same stupid civil message over and over again than start a giant calamity over something and end up with someone getting hurt. if you do get involved please stay polite about it don’t throw insults just a simple “hey this art was done by princeofmints/tv-headache/zachary jack/dirtypip/(etc my other account names) and he doesn’t want his art reposted, please take this down or add proper credit.”

-can i use your art as an icon?

sure man. only on places like instagram, tumblr, or twitter though, and proper credit in an easy to see place must be given. if a piece of art is of my ocs or especially vent art though never use it for icons. thank you.

-can i repost your art?

the answer is “no” but i know you’re going to do it anyways. easy to see credit is mandatory. if you see somebody reposting my art please let me know and i’ll talk to them. if you want to use my art in things like image edits, i don’t allow that. want to use my art in a video? if it’s something like an AMV sure fine just credit me and inform me beforehand, if it’s something like a cringe/comparison video. no. i don’t want any association with work like that whatsoever. you may not use my artwork for fanfic covers.

-can i colour/finish one of your sketches?

no. even if you don’t intend on posting it. 

-what is [insert some form of media/fandom]

https://www.google.ca/

-why do you have an entirely separate blog for your FAQ? you know you can make blog pages, right?

i’m well aware of that and originally my faq WAS set up on a blog page, but unfortunately many folks proved to be either lazy or just couldn’t figure out how to get to a blog page on mobile so i had to set it up this way for accessibility purposes.

-tons of your videos are gone, what happened to them? will they come back? can you repost them?

i set old videos on private for my own sake, i don’t like having my old content available bc it just looks old and stale and i don’t like it. there’s nothing deep about it, i just don’t want people interacting with my old stuff. as deep is it gets is i just deleted videos related to fandoms i’m sick of bc the association is fuckin annoying. these videos will not come back into public. i do keep them posted for my own reflection sake, but that’s it. don’t ask me to bring them back. don’t whine about me not putting shit back out just bc ur a little sad n gonna cry. guilting people is gross, reevaluate yourself.

if you want a song from an old video, just ask me! I’ll happily let you know what the music is in case u liked ‘em and can’t remember the titles or artists. i’ve also got a playlist full of the music i listen to so u can comb through there n see if the songs u want are there

[meandmydigitalidenity-blog]

Trolls Don’t Just Live Under the Bridge, They Also Live on the Internet

OFFICIAL POST 4 

Urban dictionary defines trolling as:

 source

Originally, I thought trolling was mostly harmless and involved people being sarcastic or smart asses on posts on the internet like this:

source

However, after doing more research and reading up on it, I’ve discovered that trolling has a much darker side that is more like cyber bullying than anything else. Trolls on the internet can and have ruined people’s lives and have real life effects on people. While bullying has always existed, technology has increased the audience to the bullying and can allow for people to engage in more harmful harassment then before (boyd, 2014). Cyber bullying, or trolling also is more difficult to spot because parents or those around the victim can only really find out if the bullying is occurring if the victim tells them as  it is happening online and out of sight for those offline (boyd, 2014).

One of the sad and very real effects of trolling is reflected in the suicide of Charlotte Dawson. In 2012, she was targeted online and received death threats which played a large role in her suicide attempt that landed her in hospital. While many people say the best way to deal with trolls is to ignore them, no one really knows what is the most effective way to deal with these anonymous haters online. She retweeted the tweets from the trolls many of which included the hashtag #diecharlotte. 

source

Charlotte Dawson also, very bravely, sought out those that trolled her online in a bid to shame them and stop them from doing this to other people.

In 2014 Charlotte Dawson committed suicide and while there were many contributing factors, the impact of online trolls can’t be argued.

Sam Frost, who was the Bachelorette in 2015 also experienced trolling and has been struggling with them after tweeting this:

source

People think that just because people are famous that they aren’t real people, that they can say what like they like without consequences, that the person on the other end either won’t see it or won’t care. Or even worse, they do it for the purpose of causing pain and harm to people that they don’t even know. It’s super unlikely that those trolling the people like Sam Frost and Charlotte Dawson actually knew them. Sam also wrote a letter in 2016 to those that bully her online and those that bully people in general;

“Imagine if what you said about someone else online was said about you. Imagine being called fat and ugly on a daily basis. Imagine having no escape and no one to talk to. for just one moment think about what it would be like if a bully never left you alone. Think about leaving school and coming home to escape, but this bully came into your home. This bully was relentless.  They were no your Facebook, on your Instagram, on your Twitter. This bully was there 24 hours a day seven days a week.

Those empty words you write behind you keyboard have an eternal effect on the person they’re directed at. You have no idea what battles people are facing behind closed doors. Just because you are invisible and silent behind your computer, doesn’t mean those words don’t have an impact. You could ruin their day, their week and even their life.

Suicide remains one of the biggest killers among young people in Australia. Stop being a part of this tragic statistic and move forward. Why waste your energy cutting down others?

You don’t need to play the bully.

Ditch your social media accounts.

Be kinder to yourself and you’ll be kinder to others.

Think before you post and you could save a life.”

source

 The idea of anonymity is interesting as this is essentially the only reason trolls say what they say. It is unlikely that these people would be able to say these things in real life. Charlotte Dawson said, “It’s the anonymity they celebrate because they think there are no consequences” and this is very true. Knowing that what they say can’t be linked back to them often means that trolls feel like they can say anything, regardless of how rude or inappropriate it may be. Hiding behind a keyboard can bring out the worst in people. How has it gotten to the point where it is now common for people to send death threats and hurtful messages online, not only to celebrities but also to everyday normal people.

SOURCES CITED

boyd, d (2014) ‘Bullying: Is the Media Amplifying Meanness and Cruelty?’ in It’s Complicated: The Social Lives of Networked Teens, pp. 128-152

Mamamia Team 2012, ‘“ You win” Charlotte Dawson in hospital after Twitter abuse’, Mamamia, 30 August, viewed 23 April 2017, < http://www.mamamia.com.au/charlotte-dawson-and-the-twitter-trolls/ >

 O’Brien, N & Ralston, N 2014, ‘Charlotte Dawson found dead’, The Sydney Morning Herald, 22 February, viewed 23 April 2017, < http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/celebrity/charlotte-dawson-found-dead-20140222-338j6.html >