#our friendship for the better and this is whay happens???? and then she said to she had to go and that shed call later

[softshouyous-archive]

💉

[his-awesomeness]

So bitch #3 found my post. When I posted it I expected her to find it, but within a few days. sense roughly a week had passed sense I made the post I strait up forgot about it. Well, when she found it she had a fucking panic attack from it (Only Odin knows how) and she started blowing up my friends phone about it, waking him up, keeping him up until like 2 or 3 in the morning. He contacts me soon after she starts this mess and I both want to know what the fuck is going through her head, and I also want to help. So I ask if I should starting talking to her, he said no that'll make it worse. So all of my effort was on him. Because I wanted to know what she was thinking and all that I asked him and pushed it a bit to figure out what the fuck her problem was. Well, that set him off for a moment sense he was tired and exhausted and wanted to go to bed. Which, I then retracted my pushyness and swapped gears to just help him by saying little and trying not to spam him. after a moment we start talking again but he has no idea why she's like this or whay she's even saying but the only thing that's clear, is that she hates me and he tells me he'll fill me in tomorrow. I said alright and he goes to bed. I try to as well.

about an hour passes and I get curious if she made a Tumblr post about the situation from her end. I should be able to figure her side to this out (even though it's god damn retarded that there are now 2 sides to this bullshit). And what do you know, she blocked me. I start fucking laughing at the fact she got so pissy at me for fucking being honest and venting out the frustrations and pain she's put me though that I'm the one who gets blocked.So I take a quick look at Facebook, and she unfriended me. again, I start laughing.

this was fucking hilarious. I finally let all this shit out and she gets fucking pissy and does all this shit and causes this clusterfuck of drama for no reason. And she does this shit in the most childish way.

I think I forgot to mention in the big rant that she ended up friending Samantha, bitch #1. Now, it was anonymous that it was her until they started talking about me and then she found out. But prior to this, nothing could he said of 3's abusive ex without her breaking down. And we made a agreement not to do shit with both of our abusers. But because she was "friends" with her and took her face value as a person instead of the horrible manipulative and selfish person that she is. it was ok for HER to be friends with my abuser. And in that moment it was, out of fucking no where. From not being able to mention her abuser, to then it was ok for me to now be friends with her. And she said it to me as if it was ok for a while. Now do note: a fucking month before this I wanted to name my new cat Riven, from LoL. Well, she hated it and wanted me not to name her (later found out it's a boy) that because it reminded her of her ex. A name, from a popular game, of a character i love. I couldn't name my own fucking cat that just because it reminded her of her ex. But not a fucking month later. it would be ok for me to be friends with her abuser? like, what actual fuck. and it was only ok, because it justified her being friends with my abuser.

She is a fucking child. Her actions are those of a child.

and better yet, when they started talking about me more. She started taking my abusers sides on the same stories I told her that she had my side on.. I told her my mistakes, my fuck ups, everything I did wrong. but I also told her how manipulated I was, how many times I was cheated on, how many times the smallest mistake I made pissed Samantha off to the point she spent the entire day yelling at me and making me feel like shit just because I didn't want to listen to one song she sent to me. all of that bullshit, everything she did. was of course, out weighed by me missgendering her, or me "begging" her not to get breast reductions. I was a fucking horny ass freshman who didn't know shit about the world or anything. yet, fucking 4 years down the line. I'm still hated for it and every thing she did wrong is ignored and pushed aside. Because of course, I'm always wrong. everything I do is 10 times worse than anything done to me.

honestly, I don't remebr half the shit from that toxic ass relationship. that's why I can only pit down 2 things I did wrong. that aren't even that wrong. just socially not too acceptable.

but heaven forbit that I'm not too big of a fan of the "woman" I loved coming out to me 5 months into out relationship that she's gender fluid. when I was pretty blunt I wanted to be with a woman. I don't want to be with some one who fluid or is wanting a sex change. I wouldn't be happy for my life if I where, so why would i want or be ok with it then? but that slight discomfort and shit was too much. shame on me for feeling that way. I should be punished for feeling the way I did. Because that was wrong and I should love her for who she is even though she abused, manipulated, and like 2 weeks after that mess she cheated on me. but waited, like 2 months to tell me.

yea, I know you should love people for who they are if you truly love them. but I didn't, I really fucking didnt.

and that kind of summaries everything. I make a fuck up, it's not awful or anything. I just feel the way I do, and I express it. but I'm doing that, if I don't agree 100% and am comfortable with it 100%. I'm wrong, ridiculed, and abused for it.

but she cheats on me?

"oh I'll never do it again I feel so guilty please forgive me I'm so sorry"

I forgive and I try to move on

she cheats on me again

she waits 2 months to tell me

I can't really do anything about it because of

how long ago it happened

rinse and repeat.

yet what I did was so much worse.

those are the kind of stories and things that i was 100% honest to 3 about. and she helped me and took my side on it all. but the moment she's tempted with another 'friendship' which are sooo hard for hee to get. she would rather be friends with my abuser, take her said on the same fucking stories I told her. then she tries to turn it all on me, saying I'm wrong and she's right... after everything... I think that's the moment I should have told her to fuck off.

she starts taking my abusers exageratted stories of the 'horrible' shit I did to her. and she values that over me, the person she knew for almost 6 months. she wanted a new person instead of the one she knew. a new friend instead of the one she ready had...

and that's one of the things that pains me the most. and it's a example of why she's so immature and is a fucking child..

I think I got it all out, just... what the fuck man,

what the fuck Cheyenne

[seme-aru]

This is gonna be a long post so read it or don't So during my spring break I went to canada with 2 of my "friends" from hs and it was a good trip for the most part until haha I got injured. So I was staying in vancouver but on the last full day of my trip we went to Victoria. So victoria is about 5 hours from where I was staying, 2 hours to the ferry, 2 hours on the ferry, and then another hour to Victoria Anyway skipping to the actual part of the story. While I was in victoria I fell on an escalator and the sharp edge of the escalator ripped through my skin. When this happened I rushed to a restroom as fast as I could and gave friend 1 my stuff to hold. So in the restroom I was trying to get the blood to stop and it wouldn't so I asked some woman to help me. She ended up getting first aid for me and later asked if I was with anyone. I told her I was and gave her the description of my friend She comes back and GUESS WHO WASN'T THERE. NOT MY FRIEND BECAUSE SHE FUCKING LEFT. So I'm there in the restroom getting first aid and crying because looking at the injury literally made me burst into tears. But the first aid guy told me "I think I did a good job cleaning it up so when u go back to America u should go to the hospital if u think you're gonna get an infection" oh btw that was some shit advice, just go to the hospital Anyway after about 20min in the restroom I leave and find that friend one isn't fucking there but friend 2 is. So when I see him I ask where the fk she was, and you know what he tells me??? That she went to the fucking RESTROOM AND WHEN SHE HEARD SOMEONE WAS GETTING FIRST AID SHE DECIDED TO GO TO ANOTHER RESTROOM BECAUSE YOU KNOW SHE REALLY HAD TO PEE. And I was pissed off and told him "You know I WAS THE ONE GETTING FIRST AID" he says "yea I guessed but she said she really needed to use the restroom" So yea i was fucking pissed off but then omg it gets better, for some fucking reason they decided to sit on high chairs when I literally can't even bend my knee or let it relax without wanting to cry. Anyway so friend 2 asks if I'm hungry and tells me I should eat something. As if I DIDN'T JUST HAVE A TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE. Anyway I'm just so annoyed that I decide to sit at a different table so I can actually let my leg lay on something instead of hanging in air. And he later comes over to ask if I want him to sit with me and I say no. Later I hear shuffling around me but no one speaks to me. I find out that one of them PUT MY STUFF NEXT TO ME. I'M LITERALLY CRYING TO MYSELF AND FOR SOME REASON THEY THINK THE BEST THING THEY SHOULD DO IS LEAVE MY STUFF NEXT TO ME WHEN THEY COULD EASILY HAVE HELD ON TO IT. anyway so we have to get back to vancouver so we had to take the bus to the ferry, ferry to vancouver, then a bus to the train, another bus after the train and then walk up a 10min hill While on the bus for some reason friend 1 thinks that EVERY FUCKING STOP IS OUR STOP. OUR STOP IS LITERALLY THE LAST STOP AND THE LAST STOP IS A FUCKING FERRY PORT AKA THERE'S A FUCKING BOAT THERE. And her excuse was that "it's dark I can't see" Anyway while on the ferry I'm using a wheel chair because I just can't fucking walk. Anyway while on the ferry friend 2 asks if I want anything from the cafe and I pause to think about it and before I even say anything friend 1 says "I'd be down for a coffee" like ???????? And friend 2 just says "u know I was asking her (aka me)" AND YOU KNOW WHAT SHE FUCKING SAYS??? "I mean I knew u were asking her but she didn't answer and I'm down for a coffee" But wow it still gets better. While on the ferry my gauze starts bleeding through so im certain it's a lot more serious than what the first aid guy told me. So I go to the first aid on the ferry BY MYSELF because the friend 2 is in the restroom and friend 1 has to watch our stuff. However I do tell them to come find me (haha guess who never fking came) Anyway the first aid office was a fucking horrible experience. The guy didn't try to help me at all and the only thing he did do was give me a lecture on the importance of travel insurance and essentially told me I was stupid for not getting it. Anyway I have to go back to my friends but they aren't whee I thought they were and I started wheeling myself around the ferry. After awhile friend 1 finally finds me and tells me I should've checked my phone BECAUSE THEY MOVED. AND DO YOU KNOW WHY THEY MOVED? BECAUSE FRIEND 2 WANTED TO TAKE A FUCKING NAP so anyway after we get off the ferry we had to get to the train and we had to take the elevator up to the platform and they have the fucking audacity to tell me "at least we get to ride an elevator cause your injured" LIKE WHAY THE ACTUAL FUCK???????? okay so next part we get off the train and we have to find the bus stop. But guess what it's 2 blocks away and they can't fucking navigate. Anyway so we finally get to the bus stop and I just can't. If we take the bus we have to walk up a hill and I just can't do that so I want to take a taxi. But u know what the bitch says??? I CAN GIVE YOU A PIGGY BACK RIDE I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT YOUR WEIGHT OR ANYTHING BUT IT MIGHT MAKE UR KNEE WORSE. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK??? Anyway I'm fucking adamant about getting a taxi but there weren't many stopping on the street we were on. So I told them to ask a person and guess what, they literally argue who should be the one to ask. Him: but you're a white girl, u seem less threatening (btw this kid is a little Mexican boy like u are not threatening) her: yea but I'm so awkward LIKE IF IT WAS EITHER ONE OF THEM WHO WAS INJURED I WOULD TALK TO SOMEONE IN A FUCKING INSTANT NO FUCKING DEBATING LIKE WHAT THE FUCK. anyway so friend 2 ends up asking the guy but it was useless cause the taxi service wasn't answering. Anyway I see a taxi stopping and ppl leaving so I tell her to go tell the taxi driver to come...however she tells him the wrong street and we have to walk 2 blocks oh and btw the taxi isn't even there and she says "omg I feel so bad for the taxi driver cause he's losing business" and I'm literally limping to get to this taxi that's not even there and she doesn't even ask if I'm okay. Anyway once in a taxi (I found another taxi because those two are fucking useless) she tells the driver the wrong address. THE WRONG ADDRESS. Ok so once back at the bnb the place is a mess but I just can't, I want to pack my stuff and go to sleep because I just fucking can't deal with them. Oh but guess who makes me clean up the next morning??? Yea, them. Anyway so im just going to fast forward to the airport. While I'm at the airport the gauze is bleeding through again and it's been about 15 hours so I know it's definitely a lot more serious than I originally thought if the bleeding isn't stopping this many hours in. So I get paramedics and they tell me I should go to a hospital in canada but it's also going to be 800 JUST TO SEE A DOCTOR and an additional couple hundred for the actual medical help, the taxi to and from the hospital, and the hotel I would have to book so I decided to just go home Anyway in the actual airport the guy asks me to buy his breakfast (and everything else for that matter because he lost his wallet and had no money) and then tells me "I'm so hungry cause I didn't eat breakfast " guess what. I asked him to make breakfast but he said he didn't want one cause he didn't want to do dishes (Oh btw I had to do their dishes when I woke up) Anyway so the girl was flying out to somewhere else so she left first. And she was snapchatting me COMPLAINING ABOUT HER DAY. and when I told her I had to go to the hospital she responds "That sucks. " Anyway once i landed I check my phone and GUESS WHO TOLD ME SHE WAS HAVING THE WORST TRAVEL DAY OF HER LIFE BECAUSE SHE HAD TO WAIT IN A LONG LINE??? THE STUPID BITCH so anyway I was pissed off and it took me 2 hours to even get home and once I was home my parents took me to the hospital (while also telling me that the reason I fell with because I'm fat and that my fatness caused me to be unbalanced) So continuing with the story I go to the hospital and I got staples in my knee to keep my wound from opening up again. After I go to the pharmacy and I'm home friend 2 messages me asking if I'm okay and how my hospital visit was But guess who doesn't even try to contact me or ask me how I'm doing? You guessed it. So I'm just mad and really unhappy so I decide to mute my notifications on my hs group chat so I just don't have to see her or talk to her. Oh but guess what she emails me telling me how shes coming down to where I live and that she wants to hang out. And I don't respond and after 2 weeks of me ignoring her she messages me saying "wya" In a span of 2 weeks she hasn't once asked me how I was doing Anyway I get fed up with her and her complete disregard for my wellbeing AT ALL so I unfriend her on fb and untagged myself from all the canada posts she's making. Guess what she does? SHE REFRIENDED ME AND POSTED NEW PICTURES OF ME, OBVIOUSLY NOT GETTING THE POINT so I don't accept it and a couple of days later I decide to just leave the gc because I muted it anyway so what's the point of staying in it when I dont want to associate myself with her at all anymore Guess what? She messages me the next day harassing me saying she deserves an explanation. And I just don't respond because there's nothing to say. She doesn't even realize what she did wrong and I just can't with her. If you don't understand what you did wrong u never deserved my friendship in the first place. But lol IT STILL GETS BETTER. the next day she messages me telling me that it's unfair for me to be excluded in the group chat and that I shouldn't lose my hs friends because of it. Like what?? I don't understand how she thinks my friendship with them is over because I left a group chat. Additionally she tells me that we should behave like mature adults and not fight in the group chat. Guess what? I did not once bring it up to the group. Even when they asked I didn't say why because I honestly don't care if they want to be friends with her. Because I'm actually a mature adult. If she starts talking shit about me to the group I really don't care. If they really don't understand that I have my reasons and take her side then we shouldn't be friends at all either. She also sends an additional msg telling me that she's sorry that I think she's a bad friend and that she doesn't understand why I think that way. In that message there was no "I'm sorry I was a bad friend" it was a "idk what your problem is because I'm a good friend" additionally, she isn't reflecting at all and can't even fathom the possibility that she did something wrong. So yea but haven't responded and I won't respond because I don't need that in my life. This was a really long post started crying again and I'm tired so im going to sleep. Good night