#oxymoron emphasis on moron

[lmxpsuedonym]

I love how I don’t fit into any one niche

Like: I’m a tri-sport athlete but I’m a straight A student. I’m book smart not street smart. I’m a teen girl and I have hair shorter than my brothers and only wear athletic men’s clothes. I love gothic literature but I also love comic books. I only listen to either rap or theatre music. I love art but I hate drawing. I love to write. I love to read but I’m horrible at concentrating. I never talk to new people but I’m incredibly loud/extroverted around my friends.

[wingsdippedingold]

It’s kinda comical that the “most powerful HL” is constantly put into positions where he “has no other options” and must resort to lying, trickery, and vile actions.

Like ah yes, the “underdog” court of dreamers that must hide themselves from every danger in the world and makes a thousand half-baked plots to get anything done also houses the most powerful group of people ever who never shut up about it

He would be SO interesting if SJM let him stay a slimy little manipulator and didn’t constantly try to shove his abs and supposedly superior power in my face

Does this count as an elaborate oxymoron

emphasis on moron

[mushysquashythingamajig]

Bucktommy Charity Relay

The Fluff

For the @bucktommycharityrace I prepared 3 fics (fluff, smut and angst respectively) that I'll hopefully post throughout the day. This is so that everyone can read whatever their mood aligns with.

It will be really, really appreciated if you can donate to Lambda Legal here or if you can't just reblog to give it a signal boost so others can. This is an awesome event for a good cause and I'm really proud of the little space that we've built together. I hope y'all enjoy the fic.

~~

"A ball? What is it, the 19th century?"

A ball. The city had organised a small charity balls and the 118 was chosen to be a part of it, obviously.

"Technically balls originated in the middle ages, at least that's what the text says. So they're much older."

"Thanks, Buck. I didn't need to know that. Anyway, who else is gonna be there?"

"Seems like it's just a charity gala." Bobby replied, skimming over the invitation.

"So rich people?"

Bobby nodded and everyone on the table groaned. Seems like everyone has had to deal with a rich, privileged snobs before.

"Is there gonna be dancing?" Eddie interrupted the complaints.

"Looks like it."

"Well, I'm out." Chim gave up immediately, "I'm terrible at dancing. My wife and I almost broke each other's toes during dance rehearsals. And besides, Maddie's well into the pregnancy. She can't dance, and I'm not leaving her."

"Okay, Chim. The rest, you all are coming with."

Another series of groans erupted from the table. Evan did not share their sentiments. He was kind of excited. Except the rich snobs. And the-

"Hey, Buck. Are your dancing skills the same level as your sister's. If yes, than tell Tommy to wear his steel toed shoes."

Buck ignored the laughs around the table because in all honesty, Chim was right. He remembered sometimes when Maddie and Buck used to be alone in the house, they used to dance in the living room and Buck can't count the amount of unintentional smacks and toe-stepping that occurred.

Pulling out his phone, he shot Tommy a quick message.

Hey you know how to dance right?

~~

"This is stupid." Tuns out Evan did stomp on feet like no other. And somehow had zero rhythm too.

"Hey, it's okay. Just be patient, we'll learn okay?"

The 'thirty minutes and we'll be done' lesson had consumed most of their free time together and frankly Evan was over it.

"Y'know, I can just stand near the food table while you dance with someone good. This is pointless."

"Evan. Don't discredit yourself. At least now you're not stepping on my toes every second step."

"I can't understand if you're being sarcastic or genuine."

"Can't I be both?" Tommy snarked.

"You're an oxymoron, emphasis on the moron."

"Okay, let's take a brake, you're getting bitchy."

Tommy deserved the smack upside his head.

Evan collapsed in the chair, exhausted from the extensive dance lessons his boyfriend had made them goo through. Tommy somehow was still energetic, skipping slightly as he pulled the orange juice out of the fridge. Pouring two glasses, he slid one right in front of Buck, kissing his temple. If Evan giggled, no he didn't.

"My offer for you to dance with someone as good as you still stands." Buck reminded him.

"Either I dance with you or I don't dance at all." Tommy declared.

"How about we don't dance at all?" Buck proposed.

"Ooh, I don't think so. Come on Len Goodman, let's get you ready for the dance floor." He stood up, holding his hand out for his boyfriend.

"I don't even know who that is." Buck chuckled as he let himself get pulled up.

~~

"You know I'm probably gonna embarrass the hell out of you today." Buck tried to warn Tommy. He'd been sort of a debbie-downer regarding the ball. He should really stop. Tommy was probably getting tired of the self loathing.

"So? I don't care. If you do something embarrassing, I'll do something twice as embarrassing like, try to do a backflip and wreck my shit on the dance floor."

The image of Tommy trying a backflip and falling face first was funny even if it did make Evan cringe a bit. Knowing Tommy, he'd get it in the first try though. His boyfriend was just that good.

Tommy's suit was not that special, but seeing Tommy wear it, that man could make anything runway worthy. The shirt was stretching over his chest and the coat framed his back and waist nicely. Not to mention the snug pants which framed his ass and turned more than a few heads. Whatever, he was tapping that. And topping- Anyway.

Tommy moved in front of him, bowing slightly and put out his hand.

"May I have this dance?" Tommy spoke in a faux British accent.

Controlling his laughter, he replied,

"Of course."

At least his accent was a bit more believable.

Tommy's hand fitted against Tommy's back like it was made to be there. Their feet were finally moving in tandem and Evan was proud to admit that he only stepped on Tommy's feet twice. He tried to apologise but the way Tommy was looking at him made him swallow his words. Never had Buck been looked at with so much devotion, so much love. It made him squirm in his shoes. He wanted to run around, scream at the top of his lungs, YOU SEE THAT GORGEOUS MAN OVER THERE? HE LOVES ME. HE KNOWS ME AND HE LOVES MY ANYWAY.

"Hey, you're getting into your head again." Tommy pulled him out of his thoughts. He had an uncanny ability to sense when Evan was spiraling.

"I love you." He blurted out.

Seeing Tommy's smile, his nose scrunching up, the wrinkles and Evan wanted to take a picture of it and store it right next to his heart so that he could keep it safe. And he could have this anytime he wanted. He was truly the luckiest man in the world.

"That was random. You know I love you too. I love you, Evan." Tommy tilted his head before smiling.

Grinning, Evan gently cradled his head before diving in, pressing his lips to Tommy's until they were both out of breath.

"Get a room, you two." Hen heckled from the side, forcing the two of them to pull away.

"Are you okay, Evan?" Tommy checked in.

Lets see. His sister was about to give birth to his nephew. He had a beautiful family. He had a beautiful boyfriend. Maybe something more in the future. Yeah, his life was perfect, the kind only shown in movies.

"Nothing, just overwhelmed with happiness."

Tommy gave him another smile and a peck before pulling him towards the food.

"Okay, I'm starving."

[anazthecliff]

it’s buzzing

no, skittering. beetles not bees. not quite a hum.

more an itch. right where you can’t scratch.

under the shoulder blades or

- post surgery i have dead zones in my chest -

but more universal ?

(does it have to be, i thought—)

hunger. gnawing.

(you can relate to that, right?)

(who hasn’t been hungry?)

(starving)

it’s like that. something to chew on.

or?

maybe?

Not. That.

i’m wrapped in cellophane.

(suffocating. limiting. likely quite sweaty)

how do i make the opaque perfectly clear?

how do i explain how it’s empty and heavy?

and i don’t think about it because

because

because it’s all that i think about?

oxymoronic. emphasis on moron.

tension like right before the rubber band snaps

fraying ends. loose threads. kinetic energy begging to be released—oh!

PHYSICS!

maybe how i am is how it’s meant to be

an unchangeable law

an observable Fact

god, you wouldn’t think magnetism

could feel so personal

and

yet…

that’s. not. it.

something else then.

.

.

.

maybe another time

[here-for-the-vibe]

Be so fucking serious rn

You’re recycling Studio Ghibli material using a dogshit piece of software that burns through a fuckton of energy every time you use it so that you can use your “imagination” to churn out slop? And then you get mad when the people you’re stealing from tell you to cut it out?

I am so fucking tired of AI and quite frankly if I have to see another person act all high and mighty about being an “AI artist” (which is an oxymoron btw. Emphasis on moron) I will be losing my mind.

[rocks4teeth]

I’m a walking oxymoron

Emphasis on “moron”

[realpeterabell]

Oxy and other morons

Modern slaves are not in chains, they are in debt. If someone holds your debt, they hold the slavemaster's whip. That whip may rarely be used. But you are never unaware of its existence. The most effective whip is the one that is never used.

Please understand that if I appear to be more critical of The National’s writers this is only because it is the newspaper I read more than any other. I’m not ‘picking on’ Alasdair Fergus of that ilk, when I point out the grating oxymoron in the opening Sentence of his piece in today’s edition (emphasis added). WITH the ongoing cost of living crisis, people across Scotland are feeling growing…

[timomaraus]

June 23, 2023

CNN He delivered a baby on an airplane. Here's what happened next (Editor's Note: He neutralized the gang of terrorists on board and when the captain was incapacitated in the fight, he landed the plane safely, all while still delivering the 2nd beverage service to the passengers!)

CNN Who gets to set the AI agenda? (Editor's Note: Here's an idea--let's ask ChatGPT to create an agenda.)

CNN JPMorgan fined $4 million for deleting 47 million emails including some requested in subpoenas (Editor's Note: Wow, that’s a lot. $4 million. But here's the thing: last year, JPMorgan had revenues of $128 billion. So a $4 million fine for them is like fining the median household income American $2.17. (Yes, I did the math).)

CNN Australian leader dismisses alleged Russian diplomat squatter as just 'some bloke,' not a security threat (Editor's Note: "My name is Bloke. James Bloke.")

Washington Post This guy paid $6 million for a digital goose owned by a failed crypto fund (Editor's Note: He could have saved $2 million and made a lot of friends in financial services if he'd just paid off JPMorgan's fine instead.)

Washington Post Christie is booed as he attacks Trump at a gathering of religious conservatives (Editor's Note: "Christians for Donald Trump" is the greatest political/religious oxymoron of all time. Emphasis on moron.)

NY Times This stretch of boardless boardwalk in Rio de Janeiro crackles with energy (Editor's Note: Isn't a 'boardless boardwalk' just a walk?)

NY Times The Supreme Court narrowed the right to confront one's accuser in joint trials (Editor's Note: Curious as to the Court's rationale for only making this change applicable to trials in marijuana cases.)

NY Times Why This Economist Wants to Give Every Poor Child $50,000 (Editor's Note: Well, for starters, because it's not his money.)

NY Times Is There a Price That Keeps Trump Quiet? E. Jean Carroll May Find Out. (Editor's Note: And if it turns out that there is a price to keep Trump quiet, how many Americans are willing to chip in real money to make it happen?)

NY Times A Bear That Looked Like a Raccoon and Had a Dangerous Appetite (Editor's Note: Are we talking bear cub here? Because if it is a full-grown bear, looking like a raccoon is one helluva makeup job.)

NY Times When You Get So Influential That You're Bored by Your Own Aesthetic (Editor's Note: I understand. I've been fighting this for years.)

[puttinontheritz9000]

"You are an oxymoron. Emphasis on the moron part."

Techs comfy cozy at his desk, his brooch off and an oversized hoodie on. He was holding a big ol squishmallow and watching cat memes.

[viviraptor]

i think it's bc a lot of his traits are complete opposites of each other. he acts arrogant and narcissistic but he also has an inferiority complex. he values hard work and strategy over inherent talent, but still cheats to get what he wants ... why are you like this

[forgottenbones]

https://www.instagram.com/p/CUmqOXQMzIG/?utm_medium=copy_link

[starflyfarm]

Loves flowers? Ah, I see you're a man of culture as well. We've never spoken but you seem quite nice! Bright and kind! I am wishing you the best in all your endeavors and should you require some help in the mines, I have a sword you can borrow!

“Ah, yes, indeed, I appreciate your kind sentiments, my friend! ....Hehehe, sorry, sorry, I’ll quit goofin’. Funny how you call me nice and then I go and poke fun at you, haha! But really, thanks! I don’t think I’d ever call myself ‘bright’, I’ve always been more like a damp match in a dark cave, but still, ‘preciate it!”

[murdereyesnicky]

Bettman. You and your pathetic minions have done NOTHING to make this game safer, both for the players and the fans.

[scrawlingskribbles]

I’m............. *breathes* Alive.

[queenofnohr]

Bedivere and Gawain’s team name is roughly translated to “NY Round Table Dignity Preservation Squad”

and im just like

[squints]

should gawain really be there. 

s h o u l d h e r e a l l y b e t h e r e

even if he protects some lady’s dignity are we just gonna act like he doesn’t start talking about someone’s “charm points” without abandon and without shame at the drop of a hat

are we just gonna pretend like he aint doing anything to protect his own dignity

[willnotdothefandango-a]

Y’all actually help people???