#page mcconnell

[the-birth-of-art]

When in Philadelphia....

@grittymemewarehouse

[shaftyletter23]

Merry Phishmas!! Omw to Dayton, two nights of absolute insane good times. I have an extra ticket for both nights if anyone needs one!

[horseshoehate]

Phish Degrees of Separation

a/n: this is my first Phish & Community fan fiction. there may be another one coming at a later date, I haven't decided yet.

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As the study group walked around campus, they noticed some new faces. Jeff's attention was immediately drawn to a group of hippies setting up a tent near the quad. "Hey, Britta," he said, "you think they're Phish fans?"

Britta rolled her eyes. "You know Jeff, just because they're hippies doesn't mean they like Phish."

"Actually, I do like Phish," a voice from behind them said. They turn to see Trey Anastasio, Mike Gordon, Jon Fishman, and Page McConnell, all wearing Greendale Community College t-shirts.

"Wait, you guys are Phish!" Britta exclaimed.

"That's us," Trey replied with a smile.

"They're fish?" Troy said to himself, "They look human to me!"

The study group was ecstatic to meet the band and invited them to their study room to hang out. As they settled in, Jeff couldn't help but be skeptical. "So, what brings you guys to Greendale?"

"Well, we wanted to go back to school and get our degrees," Mike explained. "And we heard Greendale has a pretty relaxed admissions policy."

"Plus, we wanted to get away from all the crazy fans," Fishman added. "It's nice to be in a place where people don't constantly ask us to play our most famous song, You Enjoy Myself. I don't know about the rest of the guys, but boy, was I getting tired of it!"

"But don't you guys already have degrees from Goddard College?" Abed asked

"Well, now that's a funny story," Page started, "we actually all misplaced our degrees and the registrar refuses to reissue them on account of the constant flood of Phish fan mail they get sent. Admittedly, some of it is jarringly inappropriate."

"You all misplaced your degrees?" Jeff asked in shock.

"Weeeeeeelllllll," Mike said, "not to point fingers or anything, but the reason we lost them is that, during a particularly heated jam session, Fish's drumsticks broke and so he grabbed the nearest items to use as makeshift sticks to play out the song. They happened to be our degrees. He accidentally flung them out of an open window and into a nearby pond."

Fishman added sadly, "Despite our best efforts to retrieve them, our degrees sank to the bottom of the pond, never to be seen again."

"And so we enrolled here, at Greendale." said Page.

Still squinting in disbelief, Jeff asked "Well, if you're such great musicians with some massive cult following, why do you need degrees anyways?"

Sighing, Trey explained, "Well, the state council of Vermont passed a new law requiring all musicians based in the state performing in public venues to hold at least an associate's degree in music theory or performance, in order to improve the overall quality of live music in the area. We would have faced fines out the wazoo!"

================================================

Abed, Annie, and Troy offered to help Phish navigate Greendale's bureaucracy to get their degrees. They started by going to the Dean's office to ask for a waiver of certain requirements.

The Dean, delighted to have famous musicians on campus, agreed to help them. The band thanked him, but the Dean's stipulation was yet to be announced.

"A-ha! Well, I've just gotten the numbers and enrollment is up 200% since it was announced on Leonard's Twitter that you were attending here." the Dean said.

"Oh, that's great. I'm glad we could help." Trey said with a soft smile.

"Not as happy as I am that we don't actually have to stay here." said Mike under his breath.

"About that," said the Dean.

Mike narrowed his eyes.

"I'm going to need one more thing from all of you actually." the Dean said, pausing, "I need you all to live on campus for the rest of the semester and live like Greendale students."

Immediately, the band began protesting.

"Now, now, I'm still offering you all degrees by the end of this semester, but you just need to make Greendale seem fun and exciting to be at! I want you all attending classes and participating in activities. I need you to become part of the student body and endear youselves to the students. No if's, and's, or but's!." the Dean said with finality, "This is the greatest recruitment tool I've ever been given as a dean, and I won't have it taken away from me!"

The band quickly became a fixture around campus, often jamming in the quad or playing impromptu shows in the cafeteria. The entire student body was enamored with their laid-back attitude and unique musical style. Slowly, the band became just another part of Greendale's colorful tapestry.

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One day, a college student named Max was walking to class when he saw Mike Gordon walking towards him. Max was a huge Phish fan and was ecstatic to meet one of his musical idols. He approached Mike and nervously said, "Hey man, I love your music! Can I get a picture with you?"

Mike smiled and agreed, he was always very generous to his fans. But as Max fumbled to get his phone out, he accidentally dropped it and it shattered on the ground. Max was devastated. But Mike just laughed and said, "Don't worry about it, man. I've got something even better."

Mike then proceeded to pull out a tiny keychain that played the bass line from "Down With Disease" whenever you pressed the button. He clicked it and placed it in Max's hands. Max was stunned and left speechless.

As Mike walked away, he hummed to himself, oblivious to Max's disappointment.

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One day, a student named Dave was walking to class when he saw Jon Fishman walking towards him. Dave was a huge Phish fan and couldn't believe his eyes. Fish approached him and said, "Hey man, do you have the time?"

Dave, trying to play it cool, responded, "Uh, yeah, it's 11:36."

Fish nodded and thanked him, then walked away.

Dave was thrilled and couldn't believe what had just happened. He went to his class, but couldn't focus on anything else. From that day on, Dave thought about that everywhere he went and every time someone asked him the time, he would tell the story of how Jon Fishman himself had also once asked him the time also.

Years later, Dave would see Fish again at a Phish concert and tried to thank him for the interaction, but Fish didn't remember him at all, and just stared blankly when Dave brought it up. Oh well, at least he still had his memory of the time that Jon Fishman asked him what time it was.

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One day, Brett was walking around campus when he saw Trey Anastasio walking towards him. Brett, being a huge Phish fan, was starstruck and didn't know what to say. As Trey got closer, Brett blurted out, "Hey Trey, I love your music! Can you play 'You Enjoy Myself' for me right now?" After all, Trey did have a guitar with him, so it wasn't that unusual of a request, right?

Trey smiled and said, "Sure thing!" as he set down his guitar, revealing it to be made entirely of cardboard. It was now apparent that this was some sort of project for one of his classes. He then proceeded to beatbox and make weird mouth noises for a few seconds, causing Brett to look on in confusion.

He looked at Trey, bewildered, as he continued to beatbox. He didn't know what to do or say, so he just stood there awkwardly. Trey didn't seem to notice or care that Brett was so uncomfortable, and just kept on with his beatboxing.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Trey finished his impromptu performance and looked up at Brett. "How was that?" he asked, grinning expectantly and awaiting Brett's approval.

Brett didn't know how to respond, so he just awkwardly said, "Uh, yeah, that was... great."

Trey laughed and said, "Thanks, man! I'm always happy to please a fan!"

And with that, he picked up his cardboard guitar and walked off, leaving Brett standing there, still in shock at what had just happened.

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One day in the cafeteria, a student named Jake was standing behind Page McConnell in line at the campus deli. Page was trying to order a sandwich, but he seemed to be struggling with the menu.

"Uh, can I get the, fuckin', uh, turkey club with uh, no, tomato?" Page fumbled.

The deli worker said cheerily, "Sure thing. Would you like any dressing on that?"

Page looked panicked, as if this was an entirely unexpected question, and he said, "Uh, what kind of dressing do you have?"

The deli worker replied, "We have mayo, mustard, or ranch."

Page thought for a moment, and said "Hmm, I don't know. What do you think, man?" and he turned to Jake.

Jake (caught off guard) blurted out, "Uh, I don't know, man. Maybe try the ranch?"

Page, horrified that somebody would suggest ranch, turned to the deli worker and said, "Yeah, okay, I'll go with the mustard."

Jake immediately felt burning shame as his face turned red. He had made a grave error and now Page would never ask him for sandwich advice again.

The deli worker said, "Okay, coming right up!"

As they waited for their sandwiches, Page consciously avoided Jake's eye line. After Page recieved his sandwich, he walked to his table. His sandwich was immensely disappointing.

"I guess I should have gone with the ranch." he sighed.

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On Halloween night, the band invited the study group, along with a few other select friends, to a secret Phish show to be played on Greendale's campus. The group was excited to see their new friends in action, but became hesitant when they realized the show is being held in the abandoned Greendale Asylum.

As they made their way through the dark, creepy halls, they heard strange noises and see unsettling sights. Suddenly, a figure jumped out from behind a corner, causing everyone to scream in terror. It was just the Dean, dressed as Jon Fishman for the Halloween show. Relieved but still a little shaken, the group settled in for the concert.

It was an exciting and heady concert, but halfway through the second set, as the band launched into an evil rendition of "David Bowie," things start to get even weirder. The walls began to shake, and the floor started to tilt. Suddenly, the band was sucked into a strange, swirling vortex and transported to an alternate dimension.

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In this new dimension, everything was just a little bit off. For instance, instead of coffee, the locals drank a beverage called "mud juice" made from dirt and water. They also noticed that all the stop signs were actually green. Additionally, there were no televisions or computers, but everyone spent their free time listening to radio dramas and playing board games. Even though the differences seemed bizarre to the band, the locals didn't seem to find anything unusual about their way of life. It was all very foreign and surreal to the band, but the strangest difference of all was the absence of jam bands.

They soon realized that in this dimension, music is still a big part of life, but jam bands simply didn't exist. No long, improvised jams or extended guitar solos. Instead, every song is a tightly controlled four minutes or less, and this rule is strictly enforced.

As the group explored this bizarre new world, they come across a street performer playing a guitar. They asked him to play some Phish, but he looked at them like they were crazy. "I've never heard of them," he says. "But I can play you some nice, short tunes if you'd like!"

Turning away from the man, Page says in a hushed tone, "Well guys, this may be our scariest Halloween show yet!"

[krispyweiss]

Quarter Notes: Blurbs & Briefs from Sound Bites

- In this edition: Phish; Van Morrison; the Motet; Roger Waters

PHISH TO PLAY FLOOD-RELIEF BENEFITS: Phish will play two benefit concerts, Aug. 25 and 26, at the Saratoga Performing Arts Center to boost flood-recovery efforts in Vermont and Upstate New York.

All ticket and merchandise proceeds will benefit The WaterWheel Foundation’s 2023 Flood Recovery Fund to “support both shorter-term needs and long-term recovery and resiliency projects,” the group said.

VAN MORRISON SHUTS UP: Van Morrison will release Beyond Words: Instrumental, a 17-track collection of previously unreleased material spanning the 1970s to the 2000s, Aug. 18.

Morrison, for the record, is a conspiracy theorist. Stupendous singer and musician. But a conspiracy theorist.

THE MOTET TAP NEW VOCALIST: Sarah Clarke is the Motet’s new singer.

“Sarah is hands down the most creative and collaborative singer we have ever worked with, and her enthusiasm, excitement and energy on stage is inspiring us to new levels of performance,” the band said in a statement. “She completes our sound in ways we never would have imagined and we can’t wait for the world to witness.”

Clarke begins her tenure with a 28-date tour beginning Sept. 9.

ROGER WATERS TO PERFORM DSOTM REDUX IN LONDON: Roger Waters will perform his Dark Side of the Moon Redux album in its entirety Oct. 8 and 9 in London. If lead single “Money” is any indication of how the album turned out, Sound Bites advises staying very far away.

7/28/23

[wardsutton]

Roughly 20 years ago, we made limited edition prints of these images and they sold out. Since then, we’ve been getting requests for more. At long last, your wish is our command: with altered color and a slightly smaller size (11 x 14” as opposed to 11 x 17”) we are presenting this second run of prints that we hope all can enjoy, without diminishing the collectible value of that first limited run. The “Hot Dog” image originally appeared in a special Phish issue of Entertainment Weekly in the year 2000. The “Phishbowl” originally appeared in Rolling Stone magazine in 1998. More info HERE:

https://www.printsandtherevolution.art/product/phish-hot-dog-phishbowl-2-print-set-save-on-shipping

[kenpiercemedia]

Phish Announces Annual New Year's Eve Run @ Madison Square Garden

Phish Announces Annual New Year's Eve Run @ Madison Square Garden

The Press Release: Phish has announced their annual New Year’s Eve run at New York City’s Madison Square Garden, set for December 28, 29, 30, and 31. A ticket request period is now underway at tickets.phish.com and will continue through Monday, September 25 at 12 noon (ET). Tickets go on sale to the general public beginning Friday, September 29 at 12 noon (ET). A limited number of travel packages…

[7feetofsoul]

Coming July 1st to all streaming platforms…My version of the Phish classic, Fee! Pre-Save now on Spotify and Pre-Order on iTunes June 24th! Link Below.

[elegancebeautycharm]

Zoe McConnell

[sharry-arry-odd]

But what marred that beautiful scene was–well–what looked like the corner of an old, brown leather book, sticking out of the center of his chest. Joe sighed. "Well, that's not something you see every day."

Revenant, by Phaedra Weldon

[the-birth-of-art]

Happy 60th, Leo!

(via)

[johnbierce]

Fantasy short story anthology time!

My new book, The Gorgon Incident and Other Stories: A Mage Errant Anthology, is out now on Amazon and Audible!

I absolutely love writing short stories. They push me as an author in ways that novels don't, and each one presents me with a unique, fascinating challenge. And, with this anthology, they allow me to explore parts of Anastis, the world of Mage Errant, in ways I couldn't in the main series. I get to travel to out-of-the-way corners, visit ordinary people to see how they get by in a world of giant monsters and ruthless archmages battling for control of petty territories, to explore secret conspiracies and legendary historical figures, and to flesh out Anastis' ecology, culture, and history.

If you haven't read Mage Errant yet, the first three ebooks are free for the next few days, and books four through six are on sale for $0.99 in the US and UK! Mage Errant is a completed, seven book magic school progression fantasy series, following the adventures of Hugh of Emblin as he goes from being a shy, neurodiversefailure of a student mage who struggles with anxiety and depression to being a shy, neurodiverse terrifying archmage who struggles with anxiety, depression, giant monsters, and magical superweapons. It features found family, giant monsters, a science-inspired hard magic system where you're as liable to run into hair or bismuth mages as fire mages, giant monsters, lots of queer characters, giant monsters (some of whom are also queer characters), kaijucratic systems of government, and sapient living cities. (Did I mention the giant monsters?)

The stories in the Gorgon Incident are written to be legible even to people who haven't read Mage Errant yet- though I think most people will get more out of them after reading the main series. The twenty-four stories, all originally published on my Patreon, span five centuries of history, from the last years of the Ithonian Empire up to the events of the series itself, even visiting another of Anastis' continents for the first time.

I also leaned hard into the science-inspired aspects of the setting with many of the stories, building what I like to call science puzzle stories, where the plot of the story revolves around the real-life behavior of various materials and natural processes, through a magical lens. (I had a lot of fun doing it, and it even let me include a whole additional appendix filled with notes on the science of the short stories- I love appendices.)

(Art by Aaron McConnell and Lee Moyer.)

A fugitive child finds shelter with a monster of legend. A mind-blind scholar outwits the mages who disdain him. A gold mage must secure a bank vault from a monster capable of obliterating entire cities. An aging basketweaver wakes up one morning to find a brand new river in front of her house. A palace-sized octopus seeks to defend his city from a living fortress of bone— if he can get his arms to cooperate.

In these twenty-four short stories set in the world of Mage Errant, John Bierce explores the murky depths of history, forgotten corners of Ithos and beyond, and the strangest reaches of magic itself.

Gorgon Incident US link Gorgon Incident UK link Gorgon Incident CA link Gorgon Incident AU link

Gorgon Incident Audible US link Gorgon Incident Audible UK link Gorgon Incident Audible CA link Gorgon Incident Audible AU link

Amazon US series page Amazon UK series page Amazon CA series page Amazon AU series page

[krispyweiss]

Turn the Page: Phish’s McConnell is 60

Say, is that a candle in your AC/DC bag?

Or are you just happy to see Phish?

Maybe both, as keyboardist Page McConnell becomes the first member of the group at the forefront of the second generation of jambands to turn 60. Born May 17, 1963, McConnell is leaving the other Phish in his school to wallow in their 50s.

“Down with Disease” has never been more apropos.

Though he’s had some extracurricular projects - most notably Vida Blue - over the years, McConnell is a Phish man at heart, having spent 33 of his 60 years with the group, which kicks off a summer tour in July.

He may not run like an antelope these days, but McConnell is still fast enough for you - and Trey Anastasio and Jon Fishman and Mike Gordon.

5/17/23

[april-is]

April 9, 2024: Physical Therapy, Franny Choi

Physical Therapy Franny Choi   Ask, first, what your smallest body parts require to sing again: coconut oil for your hair’s dry ends, camphor for the earlobes, rosehip kneaded into fingertips with fingertips. Grapeseed will feed most hungers of the skin. But if even your bones cry January, dip your sharpest knife in a jar of raw honey. Lather it on your thighs, making circles, making certain not to confuse this ache for that other, the one that keeps pulling you to the earth, the one question you still can’t say out loud. Recite instead the names of trees: sumac, sweet birch, slippery elm. Take your palm to the wild place under your chin and count: vein, artery, chokecherry, weeping willow, until your xacto knife pulse slows, holds. Let your mouth fill with gold, almonds, zinneas. Then: soften.

--

In an abecedarian poem, each line begins with successive letters of the alphabet.

Also: + VI. Wisdom: The Voice of God, Mary Karr + Frida Kahlo to Marty McConnell, Marty McConnell + Heartbeats, Melvin Dixon

More by Franny Choi: + Catastrophe Is Next to Godliness + The World Keeps Ending, and the World Goes On

Today in:

2023: Come Quickly, Izumi Shikibu 2022: Heretic That I Am, Tomás Q. Morín 2021: The World Has Need of You, Ellen Bass 2020: Annus Mirabilis, R. A. Villanueva 2019: This Page Ripped Out and Rolled into a Ball, Brendan Constantine 2018: Winter Stars, Larry Levis 2017: In That Other Fantasy Where We Live Forever, Wanda Coleman 2016: The cat’s song, Marge Piercy 2015: The Embrace, Mark Doty 2014: No. 6, Charles Bukowski 2013: A Schoolroom in Haiti, Kenneth Koch 2012: Track 5: Summertime, Jericho Brown 2011: Death, Is All, Ana Božičević 2010: Heaven, William Heyen 2009: April in Maine, May Sarton 2008: Making Love to Myself, James L. White 2007: Publication Date, Franz Wright 2006: Living in the Body, Joyce Sutphen 2005: Aberration (The Hubble Space Telescope before repair), Rebecca Elson

[kenpiercemedia]

Phish Announces New Year's Run For 2022 @ Madison Square Garden

Phish Announces New Year’s Run For 2022 @ Madison Square Garden

The Scoop: Phish returns to New York City this year for a four-night New Year’s run at Madison Square Garden on Wednesday, December 28th through Saturday, December 31st. A ticket request period is currently underway at tickets.phish.com (ending Monday, October 3rd at Noon ET). Tickets go on sale to the general public beginning Friday, October 7th at Noon ET at ticketmaster.com. A limited number…

[trickricksblog08]

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗚𝗶𝘁𝗺𝗼 𝗟𝗶𝘀𝘁: 𝗧𝗵𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝗪𝗵𝗼 𝗕𝗲𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘆𝗲𝗱 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗨𝗻𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗔𝗺𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗰𝗮

Where They Go One They Go All

1. Hillary Clinton

2. Bill Clinton

3. Nancy Pelosi

4. John Podesta

5. John Brennan

6. James Comey

7. Maxine Waters

8. Adam Schiff

9. Hunter Biden

10. George W. Bush

11. Dr. Anthony Fauci

12. Huma Abedin

13. Bill Gates

14. Anthony Wiener

15. George Soros

16. Lindsey Graham

17. Mitch McConnell

18. Kevin McCarthy

19. Chuck Schumer

20. Kamala Harris

21. Robert Mueller

22. Mike Pence

23. Joe Biden

24. James Clapper

24. Lloyd Austin

25. Dick Cheney

26. John Kerry

27. Alexander Soros

28. Loretta Lynch

29. Andrew McCabe

30. Peter Strzok

31. Lisa Page

32. James Baker

33. Eric Holder

34. Tony Podesta

35. Susan Rice

36. Harry Reid

37. Paul Ryan

38. Debbie Wasserman Schultz

39. Sally Yates

40. Mitt Romney

41. Jerry Nadler

42. Klaus Schwab

43. Michelle Obama

44. Sally Yates

45. Andrew Cuomo

46. Herbert Raymond McMaster

47. Deborah Birx

48. Mark Zuckerberg

49. Nikki Haley

The17Letter