#per ragnar

[haveyouseenthismovie-poll]

[erstwhile-punk-guerito]

[tparadox]

Yesterday's Movies might Let the Right One In

Let the Right One In. EFTI 2008.

[sesiondemadrugada]

June Night (Per Lindberg, 1940).

[theyhavetakenovermylife]

Random Facts About Joan

Bayverse!Raphael x reader

All Children Minerva Ragnar

A/N: Just thought it would be fun to give you a small list of things about each kid, and I hope you guys will find it just as fun❤️

Warnings: None❤️

The name Joan was sort of Raphael’s idea, with a good input from you. Raph would really like to name his children after strong warrior’s but came up short on names. That led you to the name Joan, after Joan of Arc. The patron saint that defended the French nation, who became a military leader. Raph found it fitting, citing that he and his brothers were named after renaissance painters, it made sense to name his first daughter after a martyr from the 1400’s.

Resting bitch face? That is Joan’s standard mode. She’s really inherited her father’s default scowling expression, narrowed eyes and downturned mouth. Paired with the crossing of her arms, she really looked like a small twin to her father.

As per tradition, when Joan turned 15, Splinter granted her a weapon that would serve her the best throughout her life, based on her preferences, her skills and her personality. Her chosen weapon was a pair of kusari-fundo. Chains with weights at the ends. And boy is she good at using them. Romeo was shocked when she almost pulled his odachi out of his hands, just by wrapping one of her chains around the blade.

Joan HATES messes. Especially in her room. She can’t take it. Her room is always clean, and she rarely lets people in there (all though it has happened that people snuck their way in. Looking at Dorothy here…), because she can’t take the thought of people messing up her things. Just don’t touch her things, unless you wish to lose a finger.

When Joan turned 13, your husband decided it was a good idea to get your first born a punching bag, especially after seeing how much she liked to use his. And that turned out to be an amazing idea, with Joan wanting it set up in her room the moment she got it.

Raph’s old boxing gloves? They’re Joan’s now. She got them/stole them, so that she could practice on her own punching bag.

It is no secret that Joan is a tough one. Actually, she might even be tougher than her own father, with an absolute iron will. Back when Joan was a young, half human half mutant turtle toddler, there was no such thing as Joan moving in order to get to Raph. No, Raph would have to move in order to get to her. She could be standing on the other side of the room, locking eyes with your husband when he was sitting on the couch, and then raise her arms, letting him know that she wanted him to carry her to the couch. And guess what, Raph would do it. Which later on would cause a lot of troubles with your second born, but that is not what we’re talking about today.

Okay, maybe Joan isn’t the toughest cookie in the world, but she is damn tough. But, she does have guilty pleasures that could be classified as more “soft”. Joan is secretly a big fan of Twilight. She has all the books and all the movies, and will watch them in her room in secret. But how did she get those books and movies without anybody knowing? Well, you’ll have to ask Joan about that.

But Joan’s absolute devastation, there was a time where Dorothy came bursting into her room, looking for a hiding spot, right in the middle of Breaking Dawn part 1. And that was how Dorothy came to know of her cousin's secret, promising not to tell anyone… if she could borrow the movies whenever she wanted to.

Ooooooooh! Who often sneaks out to the city at night? Joan does that! Who does it even if her father says it’s bad? Joan does that! But doesn’t care because humans are fun. Joan does that! And at 20 has a boyfriend from above? Joan does that!

Now back to some more family oriented. Joan LOVES spending time with her grandparents. She could be drinking tea with Master Splinter before one on one training, or spend the weekend with your parents, and she would be having the time of her life.

To most people, tough cookie Joan might seem unapproachable, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Well, that was if you knew her. As the oldest of three, she tended to be protective of her younger siblings. With a four year difference between her and Minerva, and a seven year difference between Joan and Ragnar, it was natural for her to take on a parental role at times. Even if it wasn’t needed with you and Raph around. It did happen from time to time, each time because Joan wanted what was best for her younger siblings.

[sihtricfedaraaahvicius]

The Holy Relics

Note: requested by @synintheraven! I'm guessing this is not what you had in mind, but this is where my inspiration took me. I had a blast writing this and hope you'll enjoy reading it!

Warnings: fluff, bad comedy and some misogyny.

pairing: Detective!Sihtric x you (f)

summary: being a female detective in the '80s isn't easy, and your new partner didn't make it any easier either.

wordcount: 4,4k 

Masterlist

If the man in front of you would open his mouth one more time you were probably going to explode. It was a Monday morning and you were at your favourite coffee spot, scoring a drink before heading into the station to work on a new case. It was busy, as per usual, as everyone needed their caffeine fix and there seemed to be a new barista at work, for the line was growing longer behind you and barely moving in front of you. You had been waiting at least ten minutes already and, yes, you were annoyed too. But you understood that everyone has to learn a new skill at some point, so you waited patiently for the stressed out looking barista to complete the orders of the people ahead of you. However, not everyone was as understanding as you were.

'Fucking hell,' a young student behind you sighed, and she left the line not much later.

You watched her run out of the coffee shop and to the bus stop across the street, where she managed to hop on the bus just before it departed. The man in front of you had been compulsively checking his watch and kept muttering under his breath, and it annoyed you greatly, just like the old hag who was behind you now also started to mumble her complaints.

'Can't you hurry up?' the man in front of you raised his voice, 'I have a job to go to!'

'I- I'm sorry,' the barista stammered, his cheeks turning crimson while he desperately tried to not drop two full cups.

'Be patient, sir. We all have a job to go to,' you sighed.

The man turned to face you, looked you up and down with disgust and then scoffed.

'We all have a job to go to,' he mocked you and made a face, then turned his back to you again.

'Wow,' you chuckled at him, then mumbled, 'someone's a man child.'

'Who gave you permission to leave your kitchen?' the man mumbled back over his shoulder and checked his watch again.

'Sexist asshole,' you scoffed, and you both huffed at each other.

'How much longer will this take?' the old lady behind you questioned.

'If you're all going to keep adding pressure on that poor guy, it will take even longer,' you snapped at her, and the old lady figured you were right and mumbled an apology.

'Some people just aren't fit for their jobs,' the man child retorted.

'Oh, and what is your job then that you are so perfect for?' you hissed.

'None of your fucking business.'

'Watch your language, young man,' the old lady sounded from behind you.

Before you could speak again the line suddenly moved as another barista was called in for help. And before you knew it you were paying for your coffee while the man child added some extra sugar in his. He glared at you before he rushed out of the shop, and the old lady who was behind you wished you a nice day, which took you by surprise but also reminded you that not everyone is as rude as they may seem. You jumped in your car and made your way to the station, making it in time just barely and clocking in only a minute before your shift started. You greeted your detective colleagues and made haste to the already empty briefing room where you only saw your Captain. Your day hadn't been off to the best start, and it got worse when you heard that your usual detective partner, Ragnar, had been abruptly transferred to a different city and you were immediately introduced to his replacement.

'This is detective Kjartansson,' Captain Beocca smiled proudly as he introduced the newest addition to his team who stepped through the door, 'Sihtric here will be your new partner.'

Your eyes widened and anger began to boil inside of you, your hands itching while your heart rate became dangerously high.

'You've got to be fucking kidding me,' you scoffed and stared at the new detective, who looked just as surprised as you. 'Oh no, absolutely not,' you shook your head and looked at Beocca, 'I'm not working with this guy.'

'But he's one of the best in the business,' Beocca said, dumbfounded at your reaction, 'the contracts have been signed, you two will have to work together,' he shrugged and pushed a pile of case files in your hands, then quickly left the briefing room.

'Unbelievable,' you muttered and looked at the man child you had argued with at the coffee shop, who had apparently been in a rush because it was his first day at your station.

'Yeah, well, tell me about it,' Sihtric rolled his eyes and sipped his coffee.

You stared at each other with a heated passion, and you wanted to claw his mismatched eyes out when he looked you up and down again and you remembered his sexist remark. You gave him a disgusted face and pinned the case files against his chest, forcing him to clumsily get a hold of the paperwork before it would fall and scatter over the floor.

'I hope you are fit for your job, you pig,' you hissed and turned on your heels.

You studied Sihtric as you sat across the table from him. You couldn't deny he was handsome, with his slightly scarred face and his long dark hair, which was braided on top and you were jealous of the curls he had in the back. His goatee and moustache were well kept and the tattoo in his neck on those on his fingers were attractive. He was wearing black jeans and a black blouse with a red tie, which was an odd combination with the rugged looking black leather jacket he wore on top. Sihtric earned a lot of smiles from the ladies who stopped by the donut shop you were in, if only they knew how rude he could be. You were glad that you weren't dressed as obvious detectives, because reading through case files in a donut shop was an awful cliché, and you had argued against going there. But Sihtric was stubborn and hungry, so there was no point in trying to change his mind. You watched him judgingly as he stuffed his mouth with one donut after the other, leaving sticky fingerprints all over the paperwork and your hands began to itch again at how reckless and careless he seemed to be.

'So,' he said, barely audible because his mouth was full, 'this stolen relic is one of many?'

'Yes,' you tried to keep your cool, 'churches are being targeted for their holy relics. Once stolen they seem to just vanish. We haven't found any of them back so far, this is just another one to add to the list. Usually this is a case for the local cops, but more and more relics have gone missing, whoever is behind it is not sticking to one town anymore.'

'What do you think happens with the relics?'

'Only God knows,' you shrugged.

'Have you asked him?'

'Asked who?'

'God,' Sihtric snorted, proud of his joke.

You glared at the detective with his stupid grin, your face completely emotionless, and soon Sihtric's amusement faded away too. You refused to respond to his stupidity and told him that you think the relics might either be destroyed by non-believers or simply sold, as they are worth good money. Sihtric agreed those reasons seemed logical, and he licked his donut-glazed fingers clean before leaving to pay a visit to the most recently targeted church.

'They just… they… they took the arm,' Osferth stammered, still completely in shock from his find a few days ago.

The poor monk had entered his church and found the coffin of Saint Cuthbert vandalised. To his horror he discovered that the recently preserved body of the Saint had been damaged, and his arm had been taken.

'Just the arm?' you frowned, 'why just the arm?'

'I truly don't know, detective,' Osferth fought his tears, 'only God knows.'

Sihtric exhaled sharply next to you and you saw a grin tugging at his lips. You elbowed him as a warning to not ask poor Osferth if he had "asked God".

'Perhaps the whole body was just too impractical,' you guessed, 'or they got disturbed. You really didn't see or hear anything when you arrived here?'

'No, nothing,' Osferth said sadly, 'it looked planned to me. Like they only wanted the arm, maybe because it still had rings on the fingers perhaps,' he looked suddenly panicked.

'We'll try everything to return the bones to this church,' you tried to calm Osferth.

'Thank you, detective. God bless you.'

The young monk let out a soft sob and made the sign of the cross as Sihtric took out his little notepad.

'So,' Sihtric cleared his throat and clicked his pen, 'the arm, what did it look like?'

You and Osferth looked up at Sihtric, with a puzzled look on both your faces.

'Well… it's… it's an arm, detective,' Osferth said slowly, 'it's… it's bones.'

'Right,' Sihtric said, then tucked away his notepad and sniffed, realising how dumb his question had been but too proud to openly acknowledge his stupidity.

You and Osferth watched your partner awkwardly look around the church, then you quickly thanked Osferth for his time and left the holy building. You got back into the car, seated next to Sihtric in the passenger seat as he insisted that he was a better driver because he was a man, and you began to laugh.

'What's so funny?' Sihtric frowned.

'What did the arm look like?' you mocked him, 'you idiot.'

'Shut up,' Sihtric huffed and started the car.

A few days later an anonymous tip had gotten in about a church which might be the next target. You and Sihtric were to stake out at the building at night, keeping an eye out for any suspicious activity. Since you were undercover, and because the stake out may last all night, you were both dressed rather comfortably in jeans and a hoodie, no weapons. You and Sihtric didn't speak much while you sat in the car as he was making a crossword to keep himself entertained, but whenever you did communicate you only bickered. You still wanted Sihtric to apologise for his sexist comment in the coffee shop, while he kept pushing that he wanted to get out of the car and go inside the church to look around.

'Don't do it,' you argued against his plan, 'we're not carrying any weapons, we shouldn't venture inside right now, not knowing who or how many people we might find.'

'I get it,' Sihtric sighed and looked at you, his mismatched eyes lit up by a ray of silver moon light, 'you're scared.'

'Scared? What should I be scared of?'

'It's okay,' he smiled sweetly, 'but there's nothing to be afraid of. Even if there is anyone inside right now, I'll protect you,' he winked and flexed his biceps.

'What the fuck,' you whispered, bewildered, 'I'm not fucking scared, Sihtric! I'm being smart! You can't just go and look for people when we don't even know who we're looking for!'

'Look,' Sihtric sighed, 'I'm not going to ask you to do something you're clearly afraid to do. You can stay in the car and I'll go and have a look on my own.'

'Absolutely not!' you barked and grabbed his arm when he attempted to open the car door, 'we are not going in there!'

'Fine!' Sihtric growled and shook your hand off his arm, 'we won't go inside, but at least let me take a look if there is any activity in the graveyard behind the church.'

'The graveyard is closed.'

'And?'

'And? It means we'd have to climb the walls to get in! That's… that's a felony.'

'Yeah,' Sihtric scoffed, 'that's exactly what criminals do, so we should check it out.'

You groaned and figured it was impossible to argue with this guy, so you followed him reluctantly towards the secluded graveyard. Once you reached the walls that shielded the resting place from the outside world, Sihtric couldn't deny that they had seemed lower from a distance and he agreed there was no way he could climb over them. But he then remembered he had seen a large ladder next to the church entrance, and he ran towards the spot. Not much later he came back, carrying an old wooden ladder which looked as if it was rotting, and he placed it against the wall.

'Eh,' you said nervously, 'this ladder looks like it hasn't been used in ages. I don't think this is a good idea, you might fall and get hurt-'

'Darling,' Sihtric said sternly and placed one finger against your lips to silence you, 'I really appreciate your concern about my wellbeing, but I will be fine.'

'I just really think you shouldn't-,' you stopped talking when Sihtric ignored you and began to climb the ladder.

You stood back, watching with your hands on your hips. The ladder made several creaking noises as Sihtric continued to climb higher, and you gasped while he held his breath when he suddenly broke one wooden step. He clung onto the ladder, his heart beating out of his chest, and you both watched the rotten piece of wood fall down.

'See!' you hissed, 'stop climbing! Just get back here!'

'It's only like two more steps and then I can look over the wall,' Sihtric argued, 'I'm not giving up now, so just shut up and let me do this!'

'Sihtric!' you yelled with a whisper, 'you are such a little sh-' you were hushed by the loud sound of snapping wood, and before you could blink you heard a heavy thump and saw Sihtric with his back on the grass in front of you, and he groaned.

'Holy shit!' you gasped and crouched down next to him, 'see! I fucking told you!'

'Yeah, I'm fine, thanks for asking!' he snarled and tried to push himself up, but hissed in pain and reached for his right arm as he did.

'Sure, fine my ass,' you grumbled, 'pretty sure you broke something, we better get you to a hospital. Nice one!'

Sihtric kept telling you he was fine and managed to stumble to the car, but when he moaned in agony as he tried to open the car door you pushed him towards the passenger side and drove him to the nearest hospital. In the hospital you got proven right, because Sihtric had broken his arm and it was to be placed in a cast.

'Well,' you said as you both looked at the x-ray photo of his broken bone, 'at least now you'll have a clear idea of what that stolen arm should look like.'

A few weeks had passed and you finally got a lead on the stolen relics. All traces seemed to lead back to a guy named Aethelhelm, and you were staking out again at a different church this time, hoping to catch him.

'I just don't get it,' Sihtric mumbled as he watched the church, 'why would someone who works for the church steal those things?'

'Because they are worth a lot of money,' you sighed.

'But doesn't it go against their beliefs?'

'I guess. But this guy is a wolf in sheep's clothing. The more relics he has, the more he can sell, the more money he will get and that will give him more power.'

'I guess that makes sense,' Sihtric agreed.

'Maybe you should've fallen on your head,' you snickered and poked the cast around his broken arm, 'it might've knocked some sense into you.'

'What exactly is your problem with me?' Sihtric suddenly snapped.

You scoffed, refusing to answer. You were convinced Sihtric knew you didn't like him very much because of that first impression at the coffee shop. Sure, he wasn't all that bad once you got to know him better, but first impressions always last. And he simply wasn't the brightest sometimes, which annoyed you as well. Sihtric wasn't as serious as you while on the job, and you often struggled with his jokes and playful nature.

'I don't have a problem with you,' you muttered.

'You clearly do, lady.'

'You clearly have a problem with me,' you hissed, 'so what is it? Do you have a crush on me or something?'

'Excuse me?' Sihtric spat, 'oh, I see… so that's your problem.'

'What?'

'You,' he grinned, 'you have a crush on me.'

'No I don't!'

'You totally do, I can see you're blushing.'

'Shut up!' you huffed.

'Oh, you so wanna kiss me,' Sihtric laughed, 'don't lie.'

'I don't!

'You do.'

'I really don't,' you gritted your teeth.

'Why not?'

'Because why would I?!' you yelled and threw your hands up.

'You're just afraid,' Sihtric taunted.

'What? Afraid to catch a disease?' you gave him a disgusted look, 'yeah, I am afraid.'

'No,' he squinted his eyes and leaned in, 'you're afraid you'll like it.'

'Oh, please,' you scowled, 'as if you'd be that good.'

'I might be.'

'I doubt it.'

'You know you wanna find out,' Sihtric smiled slyly and winked.

'Will you shut the fuck up if we'd kiss?'

'Maybe.'

You stared at Sihtric, your eyes were burning and your jaw clenched tightly. He knew how to grind your gears and it irritated you beyond words. You just wanted to do your job, but this man kept being a nuisance and distracting you from what's actually important right now. 

'Fine,' you sighed, as if nothing suddenly mattered anymore, 'let's get this over then.'

You grabbed onto Sihtric's leather jacket and pulled him towards you, your lips crashed into each other and awkwardly locked for a few long seconds. Then Sihtric moved his cast-free arm and brought his hand up to your face, cupping your cheek. He pulled away just enough to capture your lips more gently, and it allowed him to deepen the kiss with ease, his tongue stroking slowly and sensually against yours, making your knees weak and your head empty for a moment. Your hands seemed to have a life of their own, as they roamed up towards his neck, and then your fingers were suddenly tangled in his curls. His facial hair pricked pleasantly against your face with each movement Sihtric made, and you slowly became oblivious to your surroundings. You only heard the blood rush in your ears and the sound of his slow and heavy breaths along with the sounds of your lips and tongues. You felt your heartbeat in your throat and a warmth slowly spread through your entire body when you felt his hand move up to the back of your neck. You grabbed his face with one hand while you tugged his hair with the other, earning a soft, deep moan from Sihtric which was followed by a chuckle as he slowly broke the kiss, giving you a few more open mouthed pecks and strokes of his tongue against yours before he pulled away slightly and looked at you.

'Not so snappy anymore now, are you?' he murmured against your lips.

'You're the worst detective I ever worked with,' you breathed.

'Oh, yeah?' Sihtric smiled against your lips, then sucked your lower lip and gave you another soft peck, 'as are you.'

'Do you ever shut the hell up?' you mumbled, lightheaded.

'You know… you can't talk to a detective like that,' he said softly, lips still touching, 'someone needs to take care of that attitude of yours.'

'Yes, detective,' you whispered and smiled, to which Sihtric hummed and pulled you in for another long kiss.

You had only wanted him to shut up. Yes, maybe you thought he was pretty hot too and the kiss was great, but you would never give him the satisfaction of telling him that he was indeed a good kisser. When you started to come back to your senses again you abruptly pulled away, remembering you were on a stake out, and you wiped your lips with the sleeve of your hoodie while Sihtric sat back and wiped his mouth with his hand before he looked at the church again.

'Well,' you said nonchalantly, 'I guess it was okay,' you lied, the colour of your cheeks and your dazed eyes betraying your true feelings.

If only Sihtric wasn't as pleasantly overwhelmed as you were, he would've noticed you struggled to compose yourself again, indicating that you absolutely downplayed the effect the kiss actually had on you, but his cheeks had slightly reddened too and he wouldn't let you see it.

'Anyway,' you cleared your throat, 'we… we should call it a night. We've been here for hours and there hasn't been any activity-'

'Wait a minute,' Sihtric interrupted, 'there was a black van parked near the church for as long as we've been here. And it's… it's gone.'

'So how exactly did you two manage to miss out on the only moving vehicle in hours?!' Beocca asked, his face reddened with anger while he paced back and forth in his office.

'Well… we… I don't know,' you mumbled.

You and Sihtric had agreed that there was no way you were going to tell Beocca that you could've caught Aethelhelm in the act if you hadn't been sticking your tongues down each other's throat during the stake out the night before.

'We're sorry,' Sihtric added a mumble of his own.

'This is just… it's unbelievable!' Beocca yelled, 'I have no other choice than taking you two off the case. This is just ridiculous! Staking out for hours and somehow missing-' he paused in an attempt to calm his anger, 'Detectives Finan and Uhtred will take over the case, they've been looking into the other stolen relics already and have made better progress!'

'No, please!' you tried, but to no avail as Beocca continued his outburst.

'And you two will be sorting old files in the basement for the next few weeks! You imbeciles!' he snarled and left his office.

'This is all your fucking fault,' you punched Sihtric's casted arm, and he groaned.

Not much later you and Sihtric were going through piles of old dusty files, deciding if they could be destroyed or put in the records room. You had been furious with Sihtric, but your anger slowly made way for sadness. Even if he annoyed you, you had grown fond of him and you couldn't deny that the past few weeks with him had been exciting. You blamed him for being taken off the case, but you were just as guilty as he was and you felt the need to apologise.

'Don't worry about it,' Sihtric replied, 'it happened. At least we weren't fired.'

'Being taken off a case is worse,' you said softly.

Sihtric didn't know what to say, and you looked away when suddenly your disappointment took over and you began to weep silently. Sihtric didn't notice it as he was going through the files, and when you sniffled several times he thought you just needed to sneeze.

'Do you need a tissue?' he asked, 'it's really dusty in here. Maybe you should blow your nose before you sneeze all over these fil-'

'I don't need to fucking sneeze!' you yelled desperately through your tears.

'Oh,' Sihtric gasped as he realised you were crying, 'what's wrong?'

'Everything!' you cried, 'I worked so hard to get where I am, to work on big cases as a woman in a station that's filled with men. Men who fuck up all the time and no one even cares. But I made one mistake, which wasn't even a life threatening one, and see where it landed me! It's so unfair!' you sobbed.

Sihtric clicked his tongue and sighed, feeling bad for you. He dropped the files on the floor next to him and crawled past the file boxes towards you.

'Come here,' Sihtric said softly and carefully pulled you in his arms, his cast resting on your shoulders, 'it's okay. I mean… I can't say that I understand it, because I don't, but I do know you're a good detective. Beocca was pretty harsh with his decision, but then we all know how much of a religious man he is, so I guess this case is just personal to him,' he reasoned, 'this is only temporary, you will get another case again, I'm sure of it.'

'How do you know?' you sniffled in his arms, your head resting against his chest while he leaned his chin on top of your head.

'Because you're smarter than most people in this station, and Beocca knows that too. I'm sorry I riled you up, and I'm sorry I was so rude in that coffee shop. I had no reason to say those things, I was just stressed about this new job and I took it out on the wrong people. I know you miss your previous partner, and I'm sorry he was transferred. I'll see what I can do,' Sihtric sighed, 'you know, maybe I can swap with him or something, and get him back here.'

You looked up at Sihtric and he wiped your tears.

'Would you really do that?'

'You know… I've really grown to like you,' he smiled sweetly, 'so if you want me to try and transfer, I would for you, even if it would sadden me.'

You exhaled sharply and then shrugged at him as you sat back. You mindlessly began to doodle on his arm cast while you went over your thoughts. Sihtric just looked at you, trying to figure out what you were thinking and not being aware you were drawing on his cast.

'I don't know,' you sniffled after a moment, 'maybe I don't want you to transfer anymore.'

You smiled faintly at Sihtric before you got up, telling him you needed some air and a coffee. Sihtric said you should take a short break and that he'd stay in the basement, sorting files, which you agreed to and promised you'd be back in ten minutes. Sihtric watched you walk out the door, and when he reached out to pick up some files he noticed his cast, and he smiled at the little heart you had drawn on it just yet.

taglist: @foxyanon @alexagirlie @sihtricsafin @neonhairspray @gemini-mama @lexwolfhale @sigtryggrswifey @skyofficialxx @djarinsgirl27 @m-a-s-h-k-a @verenahx @mrsarnasdelicious @diiickbrainn @little-diable @maii777 @urmomsgirlfriend1 @dixie-elocin @elle4404 @bubblyabs @ylvie50 @succnfuccubus @hb8301 @willowbrookesblog @apolloanddaphnis @jennifer0305 @carnationworld @justanother-sihtricgirlie

If you want to be added/removed from the taglist, message me 🖤

[monster-match-if]

Is the mc human? What will we be able to customize?

MC is human, but I'm thinking of maybe letting you choose if your MC wants to transform into a vampire or werewolf towards the end. And maybe the option to discover they can do magic (witch/warlock/mage type). This will happen maybe in the last week of the show. You'll be able to customize MC's appearance (skin, hair and eye color as well as height and body type... tattoos, piercings, freckles, glasses/ contact lenses.) I'm not entirely sure if I want to add a beauty option (like if MC sees themselves more/less attractive than the other contestants), but they will always be alluring to the ROs, obviously, lol. I'll get back to this in Chapter/Day 2.

You will have to choose between male and female MC. The game won't specify if MC transitioned or not, but the respective body parts will be used in the spicy scenes and will probably be reflected in the clothing options as well, though there will always be at lest 3 options varying from prude to skimpy - and I'm always open to suggestions for these. I suppose I could always add at least one more gender non confirmative option🤔 Neither MC nor the others will be grouped into Women vs Men activities/challenges, it will always be by couples or decided by the public (aka me😂). I think the only route where this will be slightly relevant is Ragnar's (werewolf) since there will be talk about eventually staring a family, so all F MCs that can't or don't want kids (biological, surrogate or adopted) will be locked out of the romance from this one route only.

I also kinda wanna add that I will not be changing this (MC binary sex or Ragnar's sexuality). This is a side-side-side project of mine and I'm already codding a bunch of stuff that were not in the original plan I had for this story. If I had more time, I would. I'm also thinking of making the game downloadable once finished and let anyone add/change upon it whatever options they want. If anyone will want to code/write different customizations or routes or just check the code or have it as a template for their own stories, I'm fine with it.

I haven't gotten to the coding yet, but I'm thinking of adding pronouns as well. The only issue is I HATE 'they' from a purely codding standpoint cause then I have to code all the freaking verbs I use to plural for this one set of pronouns that I'm not even sure if anyone uses in game... I'm thinking of letting everyone customize their pronouns, as well as change them whenever from the Profile tab, with the added note that all verbs will just be in singular form when referring to MC. Again, I'm sorry, it just takes time and patience, things I'm lacking more and more.

Personality wise, there will be 3 options: The Sweetheart - timid and, well, sweet The Charmer - friendly, average flirt, cracking jokes here and there The Flirt - very bold, very flirty

These will never lock per se, but the highest stat will always trigger some flavor text. But they are a bit separate from the actual romance choices (MC can be a sweetheart and still initiate things, but it will probably be mentioned they are not so bold otherwise, or a complete flirt and still get shy in some instances). There will also be a few choices where MC can follow their emotions/ heart, or logic/ brain.

I think I got everything and then some 😂

[procrastinatingsoicanreadfanfics]

vikings modern!au except its the lothbrok divorce drama in the second round. this time everything is highly televised and constantly failing politican and business owner ragnar lothbrok gets a sextape leaked (its him and his rival ecbert) (both of them are running for the same post)

this causes his children to spiral, which means athelstan is taking care of them, but its kind of a stressful job bc hes also so preoccupied vacuuming up ragnars cocaine before hvitserk can accidentally eat it (this has hapepned before). aslaug is on a lesbian vampire retreat somewhere in the scottish highlands btw with her three new gfs because she naturally returned to the polycule lifestyle immediately post divorce.

lagertha is currently busy getting bjorn into a uni he doesnt have the grades for by wiring herself hte money for a library building from ragnar's account (she naturally still has all his passwords and theyre all gydas birthday) (gydas still dead btw she had cancer with was super tragic but also ragnar definitely brings it up in all of his campaigns) (rip)

athelstan's also sweating balls taking care of ivar bc ivar is literally runnign a mlm in his school and also selling webinars on telegram or somtehing. ubbe has three breakdowns per hour over masculinity and his trauma but also hes bringing home margrethe, which means that athelstan constatnly just rhows protection his way (hes not gay freidns with ragnar for nothing)

the only person enjoying this is sigurd, who is SO sick of being called a nepo baby and conveniently forgets that his mother is a retired super model and rockstar.

@levithestripper this is what my blog is going to become now

[best-character-named-x-poll]

Best Character Named X Poll

I'm doing a series of "Best Character Named X" polls where all the characters have the same first name but are from completely different media, feel free to send in name/charcacter suggestions, I'm posting one poll a day. New polls scheduled for 1:30PM BST everyday.

If your favourite character is not included in the poll very sorry i have either never heard of them or actively chose not to include them as theres only 6 characters per poll. Characters will only count of that is their first name, surnames do not count. Official characters in canon only, please do not submit OCs.

Round 320: Camille

Round 321: Olaf

Round 322: Dana

Round 323: Tim

Round 324: Daisy

Round 325: Quentin

Round 326: Flora

Past Polls

Poll Ideas under the cut

Names that I have a complete list for*

Rebecca, Steve, Victoria, Katherine, George, Diana, Andy, Nora, Angel, Judy, Jo, Miranda, Pearl, Malcolm, Jamie, Tam, Klaus, Luna, Delilah, Claudia, Juliet, Jonas, Celia, Katya, Cynthia, Corey, Minerva, Ebony, Miriam, Percy, Bianca, Amara, Cleo, Cecil, Mabel, May, August, Francis, Matilda, Deborah, Jared, Kendra, Ophelia, Liesel, Fitz, Aurora, Ramona, Orion, Kala, Madeline, Anastasia, Kit, Marian, Lena, Polly, Cora, Leah, Jules, Irene, Laurie, Laurel, Hilda, Valentine, Joe, Monty, Skye, Walter, Marissa, Hope, Oberon, Lorna, Ace, Calvin, Bridget, Ulrich, Roger, Stella, Lenore, Wanda, Winona, Hannibal, Newt, Aiden, Oscar, Dorian, Dorothy, Una, Marnie, Mirabel, Dora, Olympia, Toby, Chip, Fearne, Axel, Gil, Bo, Rue, Leslie, Isabelle, Agnes, Luther, Sally, Delia, Richter, Scarlet, Bernard, Ray, Nigel, Selina, Harley, Blue, Missy, Perry, Paige, Duke, Tao, Gemma, Cornelius, Wendy, Apollo, Celeste, Clyde, Summer, Esther, Cole, Kieran, Melody, Vivian, Haley, Prudence, Ralph, Azrael, Lauren, Molly, Pauline, Athena, Darcy, Stan, Dana, Lee, Red, Stuart, Cliff, Gabriel, Octavia, Tsukasa, Anita, Esme, Ella, Heather, Riley, Pyrrha, Rupert, Ada, Orlando, Blair, Parker, Ike, Yukari, Tanya, Briar, Amber, Akira, Irma, Marlene, Trixie, Harriet, Letitia, Koichi, Katrina, Echo, Annette, Nami, Dale, Rod, Nina, Carina, Wade, Alucard, Rosemary, Lance, Yuki, Elena, Donatello, Puck, Callie, Moe, Hunter, Poppy, Titania, Fox, Melinda, Terry, Jackson, Melanie, Sunny, Dee, Clive, Freya, Randall, Caeser, Marina, Sasha, Dawn, Zain, Ron, Edith, Candy, Carlos, Raiden, Tara

Names I have an incomplete list for (welcome to send character suggestions)

Richter, Yasmin, Chase, Tina, Rudolf, Melvin, Melissa, Adele, Adeline, Jem, Dolores, Jude, Ginger, Bellamy, Jacob, Reese, Nemo, Addison, Adelaide, Candace, Abraham, Ragnar, Destiny, Hero, Drew, Raphael, Wallace, Jean (feminine), Cheryl, Shane, Tegan, Matthias, Liam, Ellis, Dennis, Josie, Mike, Bailey, Eden, Giselle, Suki, Keith, Wilfred, Blaine, Pam, Brianna, Sabine, Roman, Kalina, Mindy, Monet, Zara, Marcus, Elias, Mira, Glen, Farah, Faith, Enid, Ross, Antoinette, Elodie, Mallory, Kay, Renee, Willow, Albert, Howard, Oswald, Clem, Jace, Howell, Rowan, José, Christian, Ravi, Dev, Valerie, Norma, Tristan, Jolene, Yumi, Sakura, Carol, Carrie, Casper, Septimus, Rosalind, Rosamund, Rosie, Rosa, Gerald, Geraldine, Gerard, Ariel, Ariadne, Anya, Ida, Rocky, Mal, Solomon, Sol, Vera, Vincent, Nolan, Sage, Jojo, Calliope, Roxy, Roxanne, Silver, Noel, Noelle, Stacy, Lloyd, Alba, Virginia, Eva, Amos, Petra, Marla, Dante, Gretchen, Rhydian, Russ, Tate, Tatum, Morris, Ambrose, Doug, Grant, Graham, Aaron, Ivan, Paris, Doris, Rain, Sora, Wayne, Helga, Garth, Constantine, Sonny, Courtney, Jamal, Niall

Feel free to send more suggestions

*subject to change, you can still submit a character if there is no strikethrough if you think theres a character that its an absolute crime i dont add. Please don't suggest anything for the names with a strikethrough as they are polls that are already in my queue waiting to be published.

[spaceasianmillennial]

The Heartbreaking Aftermath in THE MANDALORIAN

Axe Woves: I can’t stand this guy, Paz Vizsla!

---

Axe Woves: That primitive Paz Vizsla! Making up the rules of Mandalorian chess! I’m so gonna beat him at a duel.

---

Axe Woves: Wow, Paz Vizsla never really experience our homeworld. That’s so sad. Maybe someday, I can give him a tour of my childhood haunts. Maybe instead of fighting, I can help him explore the homeland he never got to experience.

*Paz Vizsla dies.*

Axe Woves: No, no, NOOOOOOOOOO! WE COULD HAVE BEEN SO CLOSE! WE NEVER FINISHED OUR FIGHT! HE WAS MY EQUAL IN EVERY WAY! IF ONLY I COULD HAVE TOLD HIM! 

---

Axe Woves: (Sniff) His beskar. PAZ VIZSLA WAS THE ONE! I ONLY KNEW HIM FOR A FEW DAYS, FOUGHT WITH HIM ONCE, BUT I KNEW HE WAS MY TRUE LOVE! 

Din Djarin: WHAT DID YOU SAY?

Axe Woves: (Sniff) We could have fought more! Paz, we could have fought more! Paz, we could have been the most powerful Mandalorian couple!

---

Din Djarin: There’s only one Mandalorian who can declare their love for Paz Vizsla! There’s only one Mandalorian who can weep for Paz Vizsla! There’s only one Mandalorian who can tenderly cherish Paz’s memory. Axe Woves, I challenge you to a DUEL!

Axe Woves: I will prove my love for fallen Paz Vizsla, to honor him. To defeat you, means I will win his heart. 

Ragnar Vizsla: Whoever wins, shall be my new Dad, per his will. Only the Man who loves him most shall ascend to become Guardian of his Legacy.

---

3 hours later and the duel has not ended.

Axe Woves: He was my SOULMATE! If he survived, I would have taken him to see my home!

Din Djarin: I grew up with him! I bumped helmets with him! We were EX-BOYFRIENDS. Even after we broke up, we saved each other’s foundlings.  Dreaming of him is not enough for love. WE HAD AN ACTUAL FOUNDATION BEFORE YOU DID. Oh, did I mention that I bumped helmets with him? It’s basically making-out in our culture!

In the Cosmic Force...

Tarre Vizsla: I’ll be honest. I can’t predict which of the two will win. The suspense is killing me! Which one will win your heart?

Paz Vizsla: They’re gonna fight forever for me.

[men-iss-vess-ull]

me, some lowborn nobody who has killed 50,000 men with my own sword and taken 3/4 of the known world for my liege lord: "perhaps we should finish off the last tiny holdout where all our enemies are hiding"

Konungr Ragnar, during the one brief moment per day where he can squeeze a coherent thought out of his drooling retard brain: "let's withdraw all of our forces from the field to play games at my house :)"

[sesiondemadrugada]

June Night (Per Lindberg, 1940).

[the-awakened-insomnis]

I loved Age of Calamity, and with Tears of The Kingdom having been out for a year now, I feel like I have more to work with. I’ve got a big roster to fill, but so far im proud of what i got right now, of course I gotta polish some things but fuck it we ball. Lore below!!!

[-.-.-] Profile 

Layria Validus Ragnar De Bon is the daughter and only child of Link and Mipha. An excellent cook and promising adventurer, Layria made her debut across Hyrule as a reckless, silent and somewhat wild princess, always seems to be doing something, whether it be in the depths, the sky islands or the surface. She’s rarely in one place long, she’s had plenty of scars to show for her adventures, but with a mother like Mipha, the scars never last. 

On the surface, she presents a quiet demeanor but there is something off with her. She hasn’t spoken a word since the Upheaval, and the pressure she is under has rendered her unapproachable and rigid. The eyes upon her are ever-present, she’s not even sure she wants to be Queen, despite this she is determined to do right by her people. The only person who holds a real threat to everything she’s worked for is her own uncle Sidon, someone who is beloved for his charisma and is a true blooded proper zora and what a royal should be. She’s not even certain she’ll even live to be 100.

She is constantly traveling, often feeling trapped in the Domain. Determined to prove her worth, to be what is expected from someone who is the child of Hylias Hero and the Zoras’ Queen. Her very existence was thought impossible, now she must, in her own opinion, prove that she deserves to be here. She rarely gives herself a break, only truly relaxing in the wilds. 

[-.-.-] ABILITIES 

. [Water Manipulation] - Like her mother and uncle, Layria can control water, create fountains, and create weapons and objects out of water. She mainly creates arrows for her bow or duplicates of her spear. 

. [Blood Manipulation] - The Zora control water, they can push and pull the flow of it. This includes the water inside living creatures, and their blood. However, it is seen as incredibly taboo to use this outside of a medical field. It can used to puppet bodies, alive or dead. Monster or regular people. Layria has little to no issue using this in combat, even going far as to weaponize her own blood if necessary. 

. [Flurry Rush] - This ability has either saved her ass or made things worse. She still learning to properly utilize it. 

. [Healing] - Her healing power isn’t as ‘pretty’ as Miphas’ per say, Layria will literally ‘sew’ the wound close by hand, her powers would heal, but there would be a scare left behind. Most don’t come to her to be healed because of how grotesque her methods are. 

. [Spirits Eye] - The Zora are spiritual people; they believe looking someone in the eye is the only way to truly know someone. Layria is spiritually sensitive to some degree, being able to see into ones soul, the truth of what they really are. She can’t turn this ability off. She never looks anyone in the eye because of this, she discovered this ability via looking at Zelda and almost went blind, she refuses to elaborate on what she saw. 

[docrotten]

LAKE OF THE DEAD (1958, DE DØDES TJERN) – Episode 185 – Decades of Horror: The Classic Era

“Beware of the currents of the lake.  It’s dangerous to dream. Stay Awake.  The nix pretends to be asleep.  Above him lilies gently sweep.” The Grue Crew love some Norwegian poetry in their folk horror. Join this episode’s Grue-Crew – Daphne Monary-Ernsdorff, Chad Hunt, Jeff Mohr, and guest Gregory Crosby – as they check out some folk horror, Norwegian-style, in Lake of the Dead (1958).

Decades of Horror: The Classic Era Episode 185 – Lake of the Dead (1958)

Join the Crew on the Gruesome Magazine YouTube channel! Subscribe today! And click the alert to get notified of new content! https://youtube.com/gruesomemagazine

ANNOUNCEMENT Decades of Horror The Classic Era is partnering with THE CLASSIC SCI-FI MOVIE CHANNEL, THE CLASSIC HORROR MOVIE CHANNEL, and WICKED HORROR TV CHANNEL Which all now include video episodes of The Classic Era! Available on Roku, AppleTV, Amazon FireTV, AndroidTV, Online Website. Across All OTT platforms, as well as mobile, tablet, and desktop. https://classicscifichannel.com/; https://classichorrorchannel.com/; https://wickedhorrortv.com/

Synopsis: Six Oslo friends travel to the Østerdalen Valley to visit reclusive Bjørn Werner, Liljan’s brother, living in a remote cabin. A horrible tragedy occurred at a nearby lake, and legend has it that whoever stays in that cabin will meet the same end. The unsuspecting visitors realize that Werner is missing, and a series of unexplained incidents that chill the bone to the marrow are set in motion.

Directed by: Kåre Bergstrøm

Writing Credits: Kåre Bergstrøm (writer); André Bjerke (1942 novel by) (as Bernhard Borge)

Music by: Gunnar Sønstevold

Cinematography by: Ragnar Sørensen

Selected Cast:

Erling Lindahl as Kai Bugge

Bjørg Engh as Sonja Borge

Henny Moan as Liljan Werner

André Bjerke as Gabriel Mørk

Per Lillo-Stenberg as Bjørn Werner

Øyvind Øyen as Bråten

Georg Richter as Harald Gran

Inger Teien as Eva, Bjørn’s Girlfriend

Leif Sommerstad as Tore Gråvik

Henki Kolstad as Bernhard Borge

Norway has produced a multitude of good horror movies, but it all started in 1958 with Lake of the Dead (De dødes tjern). Voted fourth best Norwegian film of all time by 101 critics in 1998, Lake of the Dead is a mystery that is part ghost story, part insane killer, and sports its own psychiatrist as a cast member; just for the insane part, you see.

Based on a 1942 novel of the same title, the film also includes an actor playing the writer of that novel and the actual writer of the novel playing another character. Clear? And then there’s the scene called one of the most memorable scenes in Norwegian film history. Gregory Crosby joins the Grue Crew, and they have plenty to talk about.

At the time of this writing, Lake of the Dead (1958) is available to stream from Shudder, AMC+, and Tubi. It’s also available on physical media as one of 20 films in All The Haunts Be Ours: A Compendium Of Folk Horror |Blu-ray + CD| from Severin.

Gruesome Magazine’s Decades of Horror: The Classic Era records a new episode every two weeks. Next in their very flexible schedule – this one chosen by Chad – is The Werewolf (1956)! Director Fred F. Sears (The Giant Claw, Earth vs. the Flying Saucers) gives us a different take on the werewolf trope, though the werewolf makeup might look a little familiar. The Grue Crew can’t wait! 

Please let them know how they’re doing! They want to hear from you – the coolest, grooviest fans: leave them a message or leave a comment on the Gruesome Magazine YouTube channel, the site, or email the Decades of Horror: The Classic Era podcast hosts at feedback@gruesomemagazine.com

To each of you from each of them, “Thank you so much for watching and listening!”

Check out this episode!

[persephones-journey]

Okay. It’s been 2 days since The Last Kingdom wrapped up with its movie. So, I have had time to ponder, and cry, and think, and be in denial, but I think it’s time I share what that show has done for me and how it may have changed my life.

All right, so picture this, I am scrolling on Tumblr on my desktop bored out of my mind, not writing, in fact I think at this point I hadn’t written anything in months. And then suddenly there’s this gif set.

I can’t tell you which person I follows that posted it but I do remember my first reaction: Is that Francis from Reign?

And I was right. It was a gif set of Aethelflaed and Aethelred’s wedding. I was mildly interested but kept scrolling. And then came another gif set; same wedding but this one had Finan and Aethelwold.

I did not know the characters names then but I did know that 1. Aethelwold called Finan an Irishman and I really do have a soft spot for guys with accents and 2. Finan saying ‘I’ll kill ya in your sleep’ had exactly no business being that sexy.

That gif set made me write down the name of the show ‘The Last Kingdom’ into my notebook of tv shows/crime documentaries to watch.

BUT

I did not watch it until later… You guessed it lockdown from COVID. I had so much time, so I binged the series.

And waited all through season 1 for Finan, he didn’t show and man, not going to lie, Uhtred was not making the best decisions. I almost quit the show… but I had a goal: sexy Irishman.

(I’m halfway joking about that…)

When I did reach season 2 and Finan, I found I had fallen for other characters; Ragnar, Hild, Leofric, Beocca, hell even Alfred was all right. But season 2 also brought Thyra, Sihtric, Gisela, and Osferth.

I loved the whole found family dynamic. And it helped a tiny bit that a lot of the actors were fairly good looking.

But I don’t think I actually fell in love with the show until season 3.

I know, all of you are like ‘we get it. Season 3 Finan was sexy, you have mentioned it before’ and I have. But honestly, look at him:

But it was more than just Finan looking sexy, (all my friends are like ‘you’re lying’) it was the Coccham Squad as a whole. They had grown closer and tighter. The storyline for season 3 was the perfect balance of heartbreak and triumph for me. Finan was a smartass, always saying what I was thinking. Sihtric had his spy moment and fake turn. Osferth was sweet and caring. And Uhtred, surprisingly he had grown as a character, unsurprisingly he was still making stupid decisions.

But this season is my fave for more than that. This season, it got that writing spark going again.

And as I moved onto season 4, that spark became a flame.

So I wrote like 600 pages, no chapter breaks, one doc per season of this idea I had. And I told myself that would be it. I didn’t expect the desire to write to last, and if it did I was a hardcore Supernatural girl. I had stories I needed to finish for that fandom.

Finan though, that sexy Irish bastard would not be denied.

And I found myself rewatching the series… I mean, I started at season 2 the episode where Finan shows up. ( sorry Em)

And I got another idea. And I just decided: Fuck it. And signed up to get an Ao3 account and started writing and posting.

Now, this is the part where I get a little emotional. It was through my fic that I met some of my closest friends. I got an invite to a Discord server and the rest is history.

I have laughed with these awesome peeps, cried with them, celebrated their victories, and shared in their defeats. Spent far too many hours talking about how sexy certain characters are *cough cough* Finan and Sihtric.

I found my own family, you could say.

So, yes, The Last Kingdom is over, there will be no new adventures with Uhtred and his pretty boys.

But I will still have my own adventures with the Bread team. @emilyhufflepufftlk @lauwrite1225 @morosemagick @solinarimoon @blah-blah-blah-bla @muddleofnervouswords @medievalfangirl @cibs @93xdiagonxalley @anotherwinchesterfangirl

And I have Uhtred, Finan, Sihtric, and Osferth to thank for that, along with the many other great characters who made that show so damn compelling.

So thank you to The Last Kingdom for bringing me my people.

Oh, and for dropping this incredibly sexy but so nerdy Scotsman on my radar…. But that’s another post 😉

[marthawrites]

10 characters 10 fandoms

Thank you for tagging me @babygirlyofthevale @fairysluna @targaryenbrainrot ♥♥♥

I kept this to men who have my hearts and my bi ass might vvvvery well do one for women who also have my hearts! I forced myself to keep it to one character per fandom. It was HARD

House of the Dragon: Aemond Targaryen OBVIOUSLY

Game of thrones: Jorah

American Horror Story: Mr. March

Stranger Things: Hopper

Black Sails: Captain Flint

Marvel: Dr Strange

Peaky Blinders: Tommy Shelby

The Last of Us: Joel Miller

Lord of the Rings: Aragorn

Vikings: Ragnar Lothbrok

(NO PRESSURE) Tagging: @arcielee @lost-and-founds @ilikeitbetterangsty @randomdragonfires @aemonds-fire @castellomargot @takenbythestarcatchers @ripdragonbeans @theold-ultraviolence @st-eve-barnes and anyone else who wants to do it!!