Still Life To Live
Vasco x De Sardet
Word Count: 2.1K
Warnings: Explicit Language, Wee-bit of Angst
Author's Note: Legit this is the first female De Sardet I've written besides the one with Kurt -Thorne
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She wakes with a sadness still ever-present in her chest as she stares out the window, at a bird-less, sunless sky. The sheets smell like Constantin’s soap, and she can’t help but feel tears come to her eyes. She hasn’t been able to leave his room since they returned from his burial. She misses her cousin, no, her brother. Constantin was all she had in the world other than her mother. The two young cousins growing up, thick as thieves, only for it to end in such a poetic yet so tragic way. She missed him so. Missed laughing with him. Missed being around him. And she missed the moments where she wasn’t plagued with knowing his blood was on her hands, even if in the end it wasn’t his fault but the madness.
“If you know, why do you continue to blame yourself?”
She blinks a few times, coming to realize that her dear cousin is kneeling beside her; her lips wobble as she reaches out, taking his hand. “I miss you.”
“Oh, I miss you, dear cousin,” he murmurs. “But you cannot spend the rest of your life here.” His smile is so soft. “I may not be here in flesh, but I am always with you in spirit.”
“I’m sorry.”
He shakes his head. “I will not accept something you needn’t apologize for. Cousin, you saved me. You set me free.” His hand gently leaves hers, resting on her head. “If you want to honor my memory, don’t sit here and wallow while the ones you love worry for you. If that is not enough, then you must remember who you are and what you are called to do here. You have responsibility and it isn’t going away simply because I am gone.” He pats her head. “Promise me, you will get up and go. That this pain will not hold you down. I may be gone, but you have gained the world in terms of family. That old man, Kurt, the girls.” His eyes hold a shimmer of humor as he jabs, “And that Naut.”
Her laugh is watery, tears slipping down her cheeks and he’s quick to wipe them away.
“Dear cousin, there is more life to live. Promise me.”
She swallowed thickly and nodded her head. “I promise.” As he pulls away, she grabs his hand and stares into his eyes. “I love you, brother.”
Constantin, in all his spirit, simply smiles and leans over, kissing her head. “I love you, dear sister.”
She blinks once and he’s gone, the place where he was kneeling empty, all that remains of him is merely a feeling in her chest, but something in the air has changed and she rises from the bed for the first time in almost three weeks.
Her entire body aches from not moving and her stomach grumbles like there is no tomorrow. She can tell there is loss around her body, a gauntness where muscle and fat should be, but the mind and such strong emotion could always play with the body, suppressing hunger. She pulls a dress on, tightens the fabric of the corset to fit her frame as she ties various lines of linen and silk to appear somewhat appropriate.
A quick facial wash in the basin of water is all that can suffice for now, as she follows Constantin’s orders of moving on. She has so much to do, so many people to check in with, to greet, lives to maintain, rules to enforce, treaties to sign now that she is essentially acting governor before a new one is assigned.
She inhales deeply, readying herself for the surprised faces of the people as she opens the doors and steps out. Surprisingly, there are no servants, and she takes it as a small mercy, escaping the upper floor to the stairs where she walks down quietly, thinking of how she will explain her absence.
It is only when she hits the ground and walks out into the throne room that she sees her first companion speaking with another emissary; they look up at the doors and the old man smiles at her.
“Child,” he simply greets, and she smiles back at him, a little weak but one, nonetheless.
“Petrus.” She walks over as the emissary bows and leaves them.
“It is good to see you out of your room.”
She nods. “Forgive me, for—”
“There is no need to apologize for how your grief affects you.” He looks at her. “Your cousin was the only friend you had growing up. To lose that so fast…grief is merely an understatement to what you felt.” He reaches up, brushing a stray tear. “We have simply bided our time before you came out.”
“Where are the others?” she asks, looking around curiously.
“Kurt is at the barracks training, Aphra is more than likely returning from Hikmet with new supplies, and Síora went to visit her clan.”
“And what of Vasco?” she inquires, feeling something awfully funny in her chest.
Petrus frowns. “Ah, yes, Vasco…”
“What? Is he alright?”
“Oh, he’s fine, but he is leaving port right now.”
Her eyes widen, heart breaking and panicking at the same time. “He’s leaving port right now? Like this moment now?”
“Indeed.”
“B-but he—but we!” she runs to the window, stares out to see the top of the Seahorse and she feels her chest erupting. She never meant to push him away in her grief and cause him to leave. “Oh no…”
“Child…”
“I have to stop him!” she shouts, already hiking her dress up to sprint for the doors.
“Wait!”
Petrus’ calls fall on deaf ears as she runs down the steps to the grand doors, yelling for the guards to open them and they do, just in time for her to burst down the front steps for all of New Sérène to see. It takes her all of three minutes to run like hell is at her heels to get to the docks and she passes Admiral Cabral who only looks up because a sailor gets her attention.
“Lady De Sardet?!” she calls in shock, rising from her desk to run after her. “What on earth are you doing so frenzied!”
She doesn’t answer but runs to the edge of the dock where sailors are busy moving cargo that didn’t get packed into the Seahorse; it hasn’t even made it twenty feet from the port, so she isn’t too late, but she is late.
“Vasco!” she yells, cupping her hands to her mouth for better reach. “Vasco! Wait!”
She hears something from the ship before he appears at the stern, his confusion giving way to shock but a gladness is in it. “De Sardet! What are you doing here!”
Her hands come to her chest, massaging the ache growing as tears fill her eyes. “Please, don’t leave without me,” she begs. “If you’re leaving, let me come with you. I’ll sail with you, please, don’t—”
“De Sardet! Look out!”
Her turning is too slow, and she is barreled into by a sailor carrying far too many boxes at once. And for all her balance training, she loses it all as she is knocked backwards, foot caught in her dress as she screeches, trying to catch something or someone before she falls down into the frigid water.
The world ripples above her and she tries to fight for the surface but the weight of her dress and undergarments are too heavy and she sinks despite her struggle. Water invades her lungs, and she feels like stone as darkness and cold seep into her body, even as hands reach for her.
***
“She still hasn’t come out?” he asks softly, glancing up towards the third floor.
Petrus sighs. “Of course not. She lost the last remaining family she ever had.”
Vasco bristles, as if he isn’t aware of such a thing. “I know she did.”
“Then why assume she has come out of her grief.”
“I didn’t mean it like that, I merely meant that…” he falls silent, scuffing his foot; something about being around Petrus made him feel like a child again. “I just miss her.”
The old man smiles sadly, laying a hand on his shoulder. “I know you do. Even though we all do, you do much more.” He squeezes before letting go. “Believe me, if she comes out, I will be the first to send her your way.”
Vasco nods, inhaling deeply as he puts the tricorn back on his head. “I’ll be back in a few days.”
“Safe travels to San Matheus, Captain.”
***
His heart stops in his chest the second that De Sardet hits the water and comes up once before the dress pulls her back down and Vasco is cussing a storm as he strips from his belts and coat down to his tunic, pants, and socks before diving overboard for her.
The water is freezing, shocking him to his core but the sun shines enough to lead him to the woman sinking down; he grasps her waist, pulling hard as he kicks his legs with fervor until they break the surface, and he sucks in air as a rope lands near him. He wraps it around his arm and tugs, waiting for the sailors to yank them aboard and when they do, his feet hit the ground, letting go of the rope as he lays De Sardet down on the deck.
She’s unmoving, cold, and unconscious, and Vasco yanks a sailor’s knife from his belt, cutting up the front laces of her corset, ripping it open, and she snaps awake, rolling onto her side with harsh coughs as water makes its way up her esophagus. He rubs at her back, taking the blanket from Jonas who’d gone into his cabin to get it from his bed, and lays it over her shoulders as she rests on her side, breathing heavily.
“De Sardet,” he calls softly. “Are you okay?” She nods, swallowing salt as she nods and shuts her eyes, feeling a shiver run down her body from the chill of the air on her thoroughly drenched body. Vasco gets the hint and picks her up with ease, barking, “Get us back to dock!” the sailors are in a frenzy as he makes his way to his cabin and shuts the door behind him, sitting her down on his trunk at the end of his bed.
He moves methodically, stripping her out of her wet dress and undergarments to her bareness before she can even stop him; he wraps her tight in the blanket before he goes over to his chest of drawers and changes from his own wet clothes before he returns with a long tunic and a pair of cotton pants. This time, he looks up towards the ceiling as she dresses herself, or at least tries to before she mutters, “I need help.”
Vasco looks down, sees her shaking hands, and gently helps her into the shirt and laces the pants so she’s dressed. He then takes her to the bed and situates her before he crawls in beside her, wrapping his arms and legs around her, warming her as best he can.
She breathes deeply and turns in his grip, nose brushing the column of his throat as she tries to practically get in his skin. “I’m sorry,” she whispers, and he hugs her tight.
“You have nothing to be sorry for. That jackass sailor ran into you.”
“That’s not what I’m sorry for,” she answers, and pulls back despite the warning in his throat, looking into his eyes. “I shut you out and you’re leaving. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Vasco, I never meant to push you away.” Tears fill her eyes and she’s almost blubbering at this point. “Please don’t leave me. I need you, Vasco. If I have to give this all up to come, I will, but please don’t leave this island without me.”
“Woah, woah, woah,” he calms, gently caressing her face. “Tempest, I’m not going anywhere.”
“But you’re—”
“I’m just going on a supply run to San Matheus.” He frowns. “Didn’t Petrus tel—” his scowl is much worse. “That old bastard.” Vasco lets out a sigh and takes her face in his hands. “I was simply going to San Matheus to deliver supplies and come back.” His golden eyes bore into hers. “My Tempest, I would never leave you. And even if I were to, I would never go without saying goodbye.”
Her expression is downright pitiful as she asks, “Promise?”
Vasco huffs fondly and he leans forward, pressing their foreheads together. “My Tempest, I swear on my honor as a Naut and my love for you.” He kisses her softly. “Rest, my Tempest. I’m here.” Her fingers clench in his tunic as she buries her face back into his chest, breathing in gunpowder, sea salt, and leather, letting sleep wash over her in his comfort.
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Which GreedFall companion has the most fics on Ao3? - A quick analysis and why I think so
So, there are five companions in Greedfall. I'm just looking at the number of fics they're tagged in, not how many they're major characters in. Here's me and my twin's predictions for the order.
#1. Kurt (most)
We both agreed on this one. He's the first person you meet, and relevant to the story even when he isn't physically present. Plus, the straight girls and gay guys of the internet seem to think he's pretty damn hot.
#2. Vasco (me) | Síora (my twin)
The characters people are attracted to seems to greatly affect the number of fics written, and a lot of people seem to think Vasco's damn hot. (Which, I mean, I'm gay but I can see where they're coming from)
Síora is your connection to the natives, who are super important to the story of GreedFall. Also, she's one of the three most important companions in the game itself.
#3. Síora (me) | Vasco (my twin)
Like my twin said, Síora's your connection to the natives. Plus, she's quite endearing with her interest in foreign cultures. Also I'm gay and I love her.
My twin kinda agreed with me on the whole people-find-Vasco-hot thing. Also, he's one of the three most important companions.
#4. Petrus
We agreed on this one again. From what I can tell, the internet seems to be Interested (be it for better or for worse) in his story about knowing de Sardet's mother.
Also there are more Petrus x de Sardet fics than there are de Sardet x Aphra. (Which, y'all, what. the. fuck. That's just gross)
#5. Aphra (least)
This disappoints both of us, because we're both quite fond of her character, but the internet doesn't seem to share the same enthusiasm for her that we both do. She's just interested in science and learning about the natives. Also, she's significantly less racist than the rest of the Bridge Alliance.
And then I searched the tags on Ao3 to see how accurate our predictions were.
And here are the results!
#1. Vasco (376 fics)
This surprised both of us. Although, to be fair, people do seem to love writing de Sardet x Vasco.
#2. Kurt (359 fics)
This didn't really surprise me or my twin, given that he's such an important character.
#3. Síora (174 fics)
This also didn't surprise us. She's important and very pretty.
#4. Petrus (124 fics)
Disappointing but not surprising.
#5. Aphra (97 fics)
Just as disappointing and just as not surprising.
All in all, the only thing that really surprised me was that Vasco beat Kurt. The rest of it lined up with my expectations.
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Extremely niche post catering to approximately six of my mutuals and/or followers about how I think the GreedFall characters (in an idealised, good ending where a cure is possible and everyone is happy) would react/interact with the BG3 companions and Tav (well. my original tav, at least)
Vasco is hard to warm up to new people, but then he hears Wyll and Karlach hyping each other up and talking about their adventures, and especially with the way Wyll romanticises things so much, he's now listening SO intently. In return the two of them are enraptured when Vasco describes his life as a Naut, and the range of things he experienced on the seas at such a young age. He has an almost pained sort of reaction when he hears about Wyll growing up as nobility, and circumstances ripping him away from it, but is inspired to know how Wyll grows from that experience to be so much more than just the Duke's son. He really loves how much Karlach loves her people
Siora is also a little stressed about how she would be received but Jaheira and Halsin are super easy to gravitate towards and there is very quickly an understanding as they discuss their deep connections to the land and their people. Siora describes the Nádaig with such reverence and fear and awe and the two druids are positively spellbound. Halsin talks about Thaniel, and then both he and Jaheira take turns describing their wildshaping and giving some demonstrations, much to Siora's delight. I think she would also be quietly in awe of the other women in the group too, and their prowess and experiences
Kurt is pretty standoffish and just wants to keep an eye on De Sardet and Constantin, but at some point he strikes up a conversation with Shadowheart and Astarion. It's tense and cagey for a long while, and I'm not sure how it would even come up, but he learns of the Dark Justiciar training and Astarion's past under Cazador's heel, and then he's gently sharing his own traumatic experiences to show how much he understands. The camp, and the things they were made to do.... Nobody makes mention of the quick, but fiercely protective hugs between the three of them (I headcanon Kurt is a hugger. The man WILL crush someone in a hug). There is a wordless bond of strength and healing through action (and no small amount of revenge)
Aphra and Gale are warily eyeing each other up, but man. You can fit so many 'intense special interest in my chosen field of study' into these bad boys. If you can get one of them to shut up for long enough, the other will just as easily keep the conversation going. They don't quite understand much of what the other is talking about but there is mutual acceptance and respect from a scholarly point of view. Gale mentions the view from his tower in Waterdeep, and Aphra's resolve will crumble as she describes the observatories where she grew up
Petrus is stuck between Lae'zel and Minthara who are both ranting about power struggles and God/s in the Fanatics Corner™️. He quickly learns to keep his mouth shut unless he's asked for an opinion, but there is a great deal of intelligent theological debate, and about how to deal with hierarchy and control of a people, when what they have been told is the truth, simply. Is not.
De Sardet and Tav are passing a bottle of something STRONGLY alcoholic back and forth, lamenting the staggering amount of work that a 'Chosen Leader' has to do to bring people together and broker some sort of peace or alliance, OR make the hard choice and cut ties before things become unsalvageable. The conversation starts off pretty unhappy and painful, but ends with a lot of hope and love
Finally, Constantin has been utterly charmed by Minsc and Boo. So neither the Stone Lord nor our dear, darling ball of curiosity, Constantin, are causing any trouble right now. Boo is pulling every string and eldritch(?) favour he can to keep this duo contained
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WOW
What a game, holy shit 😭❤️
After all that, I was still so convinced there was going to be a way to save Constantin at the end.... he didn't deserve going through all of that. I truly don't believe that Constantin began the story with malice in his heart, or the goal to become the kind of ruler that he ended up being
Poisoned with the disease he escaped from by the people he was told to trust, a coup against him arranged and carried out, again, by people he thought he could trust, and his corruption stemmed from someone just wanting to help him be healed
And finally, De Sardet, the one last person who was meant to be there for him and help him when all other hope was lost..... was the one to end him 💔
Ugh. What a gorgeous story, I'm so so happy I got the 'best' ending possible 🥺 and I'm going to be replaying that last goodbye scene with Vasco for the next 3-5 business days, it made me so emotional 😭
De Sardet was a wonderfully done protagonist, the way he interacted with friends and enemies alike, almost always keeping a level head, with the goal to do whatever he could to foster good relations and repair damages as they were caused. I LOVED his personal journey, finding out about his own heritage and more about his people
Vasco obviously was a fast favourite companion and Kurt and Siora were also both done equally well. I feel like I enjoyed Kurt's personal missions best, honestly, they felt extremely important. Aphra and Petrus were underutilised, in my opinion, as it was clear that their differing opinions and methods were more at odds with De Sardet than the other companions
I also felt that certain side quests would have been more impactful as main missions, especially if they were also mandatory to explore in more depth. My own need to do everything I possibly can in a game, meant I didn't even think twice about doing all of the side quests, not even considering leaving them behind in gameplay
Otherwise, playing on easy mode made my experience much more enjoyable as I didn't have to worry about dying or consequences as much. While it was a bit of a speed bump to get used to controls and movement, I only initially found them a tad janky compared to larger studio games. The map system was a tiiiiny bit annoying, but nothing I didn't just get over
I chose a magic build to begin with, later utilising melee and firearms a bit more liberally. I definitely dont think I was very efficient in how I played, but the main thing was that I really enjoyed it and had fun. The combat felt really nicely done, and the Nádaig boss fights were a really awesome and impactful spectacle to engage in every now and then when the story called for it
I went into GreedFall with minimal expectations, not knowing a single thing about the story, and came out of it with so much love. I'm so fucking glad I gave this game a chance ❤️❤️❤️
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