#philza why did you do this to me

[that-sweet-jester]

Drawing this caused me pain, but what Philza Minecraft wants Philza Minecraft gets.

Request by the streamer himself 👇👇👇, why did i ask ;-;

does this count as sick and eldritch ;-;

[qangelbluebird]

Creation = The Thing (from the tubhole?)

Primary Protector (Creator (not used but could be)) = Tubbo

Rank 1 Shell = Sunny

Guardian = Philza

Shell (in general) = Eggs

Pancake Shell = Empanada

The Mother of Pancake Shell = Bagi

Duck Shell = Chayanne

Trauma Shell = Tallulah

[jestroer]

Hello gay people in my puter! Today is a nice day as it is Birthday of my beloved mutual @zombiiehorse​​! As a present I made a fanart of their hit piece of Fan Fiction feathers almost feel like fur which is. SOOOOOO GREAT

What you guys should do is to go and read it and leave a kudos and a nice comment and bookmark! Its sooooooooooooo good guys i promise its an absolute banger piece of art boys go go go

Also I didnt plan on it but this thing does fit day 2 of @/ink-ghoul’s hermittober theme Soulmates as Martyn did say that him and Grian are soulmates destined to destroy each other so i will count it as well! :)

[fancy-fangs]

"oh c!ranboo was such a pussy" "c!ranboo was so annoying they didn't have a single backbone" ARE YOU ALL CRAZY??? DID WE WATCH THE SAME DSMP???

Imagine you're just a guy, you don't remember anything, you don't know where you came from, you don't know where you are, you barely remember who you are and you see you have nothing to your name. You see this big ass nation full of people and PEOPLE ACTUALLY KILLING EACH OTHER - of fucking course you'd keep to yourself and try to not start conflicts!!!

He literally saw how people were hunted and murdered over simple disagreements!!! He literally saw how people got tortured for not doing what they were told!!! Of course he would follow the laws and whatever else he was told. Of fucking course they didn't go around starting fights and punching people around.

They were literally already at the bottom of the food chain and saw what happened to ppl who were already better off than him. Why the fuck would he not just choose to listen to everyone else.

Plus as mentioned before, he didn't know shit. He didn't know how things worked. He didn't know how their community and society worked. He didn't know the rules of their made up countries. Of course he'd just listen to what people told him. What fucking other option did he have.

Yes he was a people pleaser intrinsically from the start and obviously that stayed a part of his character (plus meta reasons and bla bla) but some people are acting like he was the biggest loser for behaving the way he did.

PLUS he got so much more confrontational when he had things to lose??? When he owned things, when he had a husband, WHEN HE HAD A CHILD - he was fucking ready to kill over them no hesitation. He didn't care enough about his own back, but he kept Tubbos like a guard dog that bites off your hand if you make the wrong move.

Do not tell me Ranboo didn't have a backbone and was such a pussy, when he literally would have fought philza about leaving tubbo alone.

C!Ranboo was a teenager with self worth issues in a society where people killed and tortured over the smallest disagreements. I think he was okay to be a bit of a "yes-man"

[brialex]

I love that people are realizing that q! Missa is terrified of flying with the lasso.

Personally, I like to relate it to the fact that he is actually afraid of the sky, not heights (This is a phobia that cc irl really has).

In interviews, videos and streams he has said that he fears falling into infinite space, or that precisely these enormous planets will fall on him. He has said that it is difficult for him to be in spaces where the stars are very clear and can be seen.

But it was also something that he confessed to Chayanne in one of their talks before he left for Japan. There is a moment where he looks at the cubic sky of the qsmp and turns to confess to Chayanne that he is afraid of the sky, that opens the door for his son to also share his feelings and tell him that he is afraid of losing his parents (very cute moment)

So this post is just to share a funfact lol

But it's also curious for me to read fanfics where Philza takes him flying in the night. Or that post where compares the Aladdin scene ("do you trust me?") with the DeathDuo... AND OMG it's absolutely nice to think that q!Phil would ask q!Missa to "trust him" before taking him flying.

Thinking about that time where he offered him alcohol on September 15, and Missa accepted. And it was very strange because Missa doesnt like to drink alcohol and this has also been reflected in his characters in rol. So why did he accept?

He absolutely trusts Philza, and that's cute. And I think that if he also offered him to fly with the lasso, he would accept, despite his fear.

[tyttamarzh]

Tallulah is Phil and Missa's daughter.

This will probably be very long, so if you want to read it, go grab some popcorn and get comfortable.

I have to talk about this because it's eating me up inside. I think I shouldn't give so much importance to comments coming from sewers like Twitter and much less Tiktok, but it makes me so sick (and I'm such a masochist that I even spend time looking for the shit they say to make me angrier and debate them xD).

I am very happy that it was finally made official, with papers certified by the federation, that Tallulah is the daughter of Philza and Missa, I think that was not entirely necessary for them, because they had assumed it for a long time (let's assume that Tallulah needed the pappers to end her W arc), although I suppose that more than anything it was done for those people who still cannot accept it or who deny the paternity of Phil and Missa (With Missa, although it bothers me, I can even understand it, he He hasn't been as present and many people don't know him, but god, it would be a crime to deny Tallulah's paternity to Phil, the man who has kept her alive and given everything for her throughout her life).

I'm glad that, although I have seen negative comments, the majority have been positive (even if it hurts them, it doesn't matter, it's official, screw them). Mainly, the negative comments have been from defenders of W and their arguments are so poor and weak that they are easily refuted. It is obvious that these people do not know Tallulah and have never met her, many do not even know how things turned out and say nonsense like that the current Llulah is an imposter, that it is not fair that they "rewrote" history and erased W (which It is false, Llulah's words make it clear that history was never changed, she simply moved on and that person remained in the past).

I refuted all those arguments on Twitter but screw Twitter, I hate the fucking character limit. So I'm going to expand (I have a lot of poison to get out of my skin). I have some points:

1- "That's not Tallulah" Of course it is her, those who witnessed her life and her growth during the year that passed, can realize that this was her natural evolution. She is the same girl who grew up overcoming her limitations, who suffered, who felt alone, who had abandonment problems, who everyone saw as a poor abandoned girl and who found comfort next to someone who has always loved her like a father and a brother who gave everything for her.

2- "They erased all her lore" No. Tallulah's lore is the one she built with Philza and Chayanne over the course of the year they lived together. Her relationship with W and her longing for him was only part of her story (although people made a lot of emphasis on that), but it was not the only thing that defined her, it never was and only people who never got to met her think that. They see her like an extension of that other person, as the only thing that kept him on the server, but did not see her as an individual character and definitely did not watch Phil's Vods and they never really knew her lore.

3-"How do they explain this in the lore?" Simple, there was someone in her life, someone who was her first father, but who spent very little time with her, who left a long time ago and who is currently no longer part of her life. She learned to let go of the past and focused in the family she has in the present, the family that loves her, that watched her grow up, that makes her happy and gives her security to believe in herself and that is the Death Family, Chayanne, Philza and Missa. Time passes, not all people stay, treasure those who are by your side and let go of what never brought you anything but pain.

4- "They should have created another egg and replaced her" Why replaceher? It has no sense or reason. She is a character who built her own story with her family, a story that never really involved that other person other than with one or another sporadic mention, why eliminate a character that evolved by itself? Little by little she separated herself from what she was at the beginning and that bond that she had with that first father was practically non-existent. What would be the point of eliminating it or replace her with another new character?

5- "No matter what other parents and appearance give her, she will always belong to W because she still carries the name he gave her" No. She never belonged to him. She lived with that man for 2 days and apart from leaving him the promise of a reunion, she did not contribute anything else to her life. She formed her own path, her passion for music was not because of him, it was something she already had before, her love for nature, for animals, everything was built in the days she lived with Philza (even with uncle Bad). She suffered for her first father but she moved on, she matured, she discovered her link with death and her powers as a medium, she acquired her own personality and little by little she built the Tallulah she is now.

She never belonged to anyone but herself and she always fought to prove that, but people insisted on dumping trauma on her and reminding her that she was an abandoned child waiting for someone who at a certain point was nothing more than an idealized dream, because There was never a real relationship between them, they never lived together long enough. She little by little made her decisions and chose the people she wanted to be her parents (and it's not that she had few options, Quackity, Bad and even F wanted to adopt her at the time and asked them to, but she was not a girl who was looking for parents). She could choose and she chose Philza, the person who had always been there for her and later she chose Missa, someone who despite not knowing her very well gave her his love unconditionally and gave her security when she needed it. Then she was able to feel the warmth of being part of a complete family.

6- "They should change her name because W gave her that name! That impostor is not Tallulah!" Why? Her name is not anyone's intellectual property, at the time it was given to her, it belonged to her for better or worse and yes, in some way it will always be a tie to her past, but a past she has already left behind and managed to overcome by creating new memories and dreams.

To a certain extent I understand those who became attached to her because she reminded them of that other person, but if they couldn't see her as her own character, it means that they never cared enough to make the effort to get to know her.

It would shock us all if a character we liked suddenly changed drastically and left behind what like us in the first place. But if they had really watched her, they would have realized that the change was not sudden, it was gradual.

She found in Phil a protective and understanding father who always put her and her brother before anything else, who suffered with her her pain and outbursts of frustration due to the depression caused by the absence of her first father. She found in Missa a cute and loving father who always showers her with love and helps her to have confidence in herself. She doesn't lack anything with them. She has closed a cycle of pain in her life and now she can heal.

She chose the look that makes her feel finally free to be herself, whatever the external reasons that led to that, she finally has a future ahead of her unbound by the past and prefers to be more like the people she considers her family now. If you can't see what all of this really meant to Tallulah and her evolution, it's because you never cared to see even 20% of her story. Well, since the middle of last year she began her journey to break away from a name and be herself, fighting to be seen for who she was.

If those people decide to continue supporting someone despite his shit, that is their right, but the server and the admin were also within their right to decide to kick him out and want to distance themselves from a person they consider unpleasant.

7-There were comments of another type, mainly from people who are really very lost with the lore, people who consider her the daughter of Quackity, even confusing her with Tilín (saying that Q didn't know if she was the daughter of W or Luzu and that she should get a DNA test), when we all know that from the beginning she was W's daughter as a single father and that the only reason Quackity could have become Tallulah's father was if to marry W, but that never happened, W didn't come back and Quackity was never able to develop that relationship with Llulah, she considered him a possible father because she knew W loved him, but Q always being kidnapped or something, they never really related much. There are people who, even with a certificate, continue to insist that Tallulah should have been given to Quackity to raise with Luzu (she had a tender interaction with Luzu and people were already asking him to adopt her, saying that she was alone and had no parents, I seriously hate them!) I shouldn't take seriously people who obviously haven't seen Philza even once and I know that many of those people are hispanic and are limited by the language barrier but if they don't have the slightest idea They shouldn't give their opinion… Tallulah is not an object to be passed from hand to hand, she chose and in order to do so she had to go through a very long and painful arc.

8- I firmly believe that it is a great win to now have a certificate that endorses who the people she considers her parents are, but I insist, it was not necessary, because that has been known for a long time and I am sure that if it was created it was to close the mouth mouth to all those people who are not capable of accepting that.

Tallulah is the daughter of Philza and Missa (and no one else), she is part of the Death Family, that is her story, it is not a whim, a whim is continuing to link her to something she is no longer a part of or wanting to make her a part of a lore that never happened or wanting to give her other parents different from the ones she grew up with (Quackity already had Tilín, Richas and now Pepito, I don't think she needs more children and Tallulah doesn't need any more shitty drama in her life).

Tallulah is a beautiful being, both with her old look and with the new and as Missa says "She deserves only the beautiful things in the world"

Tallulah is Phil and Missa's daughter!!! Tallulah is Phil and Missa's daughter!!! Tallulah is Phil and Missa's daughter!!! And I can shout it a thousand times because it's true and she always was, but now it's certified by the government and no amount of complaining or tantrums can change that fact.

Sorry for my bad english. See you!! jajaja ando re agresiva, pero es que nadie se mete con mi familia xD

[silverware-drawer]

🟥 felppps-6391 🔁 cellbo

🔎 cellbo Seguir

why is my castle full of smoke

🟥 felppps-6391

'-'

🔎 cellbo Seguir

DID FOOLISH HOTBOX THE FUCKING BLOOD ROOM

🟥 felppps-6391

'-'

4 notas

🪑 what-the-muffin 🔁 kocwillrock

🦈 kocwillrock Seguir

guys whart happens if you set cocaine on fire you have one minute adn then im trying it

🪑what-the-muffin

0_0 . . .whart

💣 endcrystalenjoyer Seguir

whart

🪺 philza Seguir

whart

🔰 etoyless Seguir

whart

🦈 kocwillrock Seguir

THATS CRAZY ITS ALMOST LIKE NOBODY ASKED

#heeheeheeheehee #prank tag

26 notas

🥵 peterparkoier 🔁 its-nice-to-miku

🐦 its-nice-to-miku Seguir

culeros

🥵 peterparkoier

YESSSSS MAMOSSSSS

403 notas

🪷 quackitieeee 🔁 elmar1an4

🌻 elmar1an4 Seguir

es lunes 😏 alguien quiere ser mi novio 😜

🦠 backflipo-numero-uno Seguir

IT'S TUESDAY YOU CHEATING BITCH FUCK YOU

🌻 elmar1an4 Seguir

yes ok I am waiting in the bedroom

🦠 backflipo-numero-uno Seguir

okay give me a couple of minutes

🪷 quackitieeee

what the fuck is wrong with you guys

5 notas

🥵 peterparkoier 🔁 cellbo

🔪 cell-bites

você vai se arrepender disso nunca esquecerei o quão saborosa sua perna era

furryfury999-deactivated38192947

Umm. . . .what the fuck ??

garbage-meister-deactivated92929947

why the hell are people in the notes acting like this is real lmfao did you idiots forget that people LIE on the INTERNET

horsey-of-coursey-deactivated848291083

okay, but has nobody noticed how this lines up perfectly with that insane alcatraz breakout that was in the news last month, only this was posted first??

garbage-meister-deactivated92929947

i'm dying y'all are so fucking dumb LMFAO

🔎 cellbo Seguir

STOP TAGGING ME THIS POST IS A THOUSAND YEARS OLD I DONT EVEN KNOW WHO THIS IS

🥵 peterparkoier

ENIGMA DO MEDO 😱

899.113 notas

🥵 peterparkoier 🔁 its-nice-to-miku

🪺 philza Seguir

Get you a man with two hundred and twenty seven alt accounts that are all in constant danger of being banned for hacking

💣 tnt-cannoff-1748 Seguir

God damn, hit on by Philza Minecraft himself, never thought I'd see the day 😳

🪺 philza Seguir

Lmao nah mate but I am hitting your gym. Give me ten minutes

💣 big-daddy-bigger-breakfast Seguir

Hell yeah

589 notas

🥵 peterparkoier 🔁 4ever-420

🕓 4ever-420 🇧🇷☑️ Seguir

PHILZA

--VERIFIED PRESIDENTIAL POST--

🕓 4ever-420 🇧🇷☑️ Seguir

CARALHO BAGHERA DONT REBLOG THAT IT WAS A DRAFT I DIDNT MEAN IT TO POST

--VERIFIED PRESIDENTIAL POST--

🐥 baghz-quacks Seguir

I don't know what youre talking about forever, it was a verified presidential post ?

🪺 philza Seguir

lmfao

🕓 4ever-420 🇧🇷☑️ Seguir

HOW DO I DELETE OTHER PEOPLES POSTS

--VERIFIED PRESIDENTIAL POST--

🕓 4ever-420 🇧🇷☑️ Seguir

FUCKING CUCURUCHO GET RID OF THIS BANNER RIGHT NOW

--VERIFIED PRESIDENTIAL POST--

🥵 peterparkoier

nem fodendo 👀

3,066 notas

🥵 peterparkoier 🔁 missa-not-missing

👑 chay-chay-chefs-blade Seguir

extra pics of the cake process because lulah told me to post them o7

Link

💀 missa-not-missing Seguir

CHAYANNE YOU'RE SO TALENTED

🪺 philza Seguir

Missa :D you finally back in wifi range?

💀 missa-not-missing Seguir

YES I AM COMING HOME RIGHT NOW

Thirty minutes!!

🪺 philza Seguir

. . .you good mate? It's been hours

💀 missa-not-missing Seguir

PHILZA HELP I FELL IN A HOLE

699 notas

🚇 tubbohell 🔁 philza

🔰 etoyless Seguir

L+ratio well played gf

🪑 what-the-muffin

@kocwillrock

🦈 kocwillrock Seguir

SHUT UP GO GET KIDNAPPED

🚇 tubbohell

am I missing something since when does etoiles have a girlfriend???

342 notas

🪑 what-the-muffin 🔁 what-the-muffin

🦈 kocwillrock Seguir

HOW IS HE GOOD AT EVERYTHING ITS FUDGING BEANBAG TOSS

🪑 what-the-muffin

hey foolish what does étoiles use when it rains

🪑 what-the-muffin

. . .a cucumbrella 0_0

🪑 what-the-muffin

foolish

🪑 what-the-muffin

foolish

🪑 what-the-muffin

foolish

🕓 4ever-420 ☑️🇧🇷 Seguir

Hi bad :D

-- VERIFIED PRESIDENTIAL POST --

🪑 what-the-muffin

Hi forever :D

🪑 what-the-muffin

foolish

🪑 what-the-muffin

foolish

🪑 what-the-muffin

foolish

🪑 what-the-muffin

foolish

666 notas

🥵 peterparkoier 🔁 ⚠️ pactriggerwarning

🦄 ayyyyypierre Seguir

If you want free GEGGS come to the GEGG factory under the statue of GEGG

🎼 wilbur-soot-official ☑️

i fucking hate gegg

🔎 cellbo Seguir

???

🔎 cellbo Seguir

this is the only thing he's ever posted?!??!??????

⚽ doctor-ovo Seguir

kkkkkkkkkkkkkk

🪪 elquackity ☑️

TU IN INFERNO PECCATORES ET IMBECILES SERA TU TUAM TUAM MISERERE CAELUM IGNEM PLUET ET SANGUIS TUUM IGNIS SIT NON ESSE TE VENIAT ARBITRIO TEMPESTATEM VENIAT ET NUNQUAM TE STULTI OMNES LUDIBRIBUS TUA RETUSUS OVIS ET RETUSUS FERRARIA ERIS OMNES MORTUUM ESSE ACTUTUM USQUAM VALE ET EGO NON REQUIRO

🧪 aquimicaehloka Seguir

what the hell

[houxe]

Regarding my SBI/DSMP Fics

TW: Abuse, Trauma, and Mentions of Suicide.

With all that has happened, I did want to come out here and make my stance clear. I will always stand with Shelby (Shubble) and all of the victims who are speaking out against Will Gold (Wilbur Soot). If you still support that bastard, unfollow me and leave my blog and whatever small community I made.

I've already stated this is my Discord channel, but I want to put it here too.

For me, c!Wilbur is so far removed from cc!Wilbur that I don't connect the two. The characters are vessels for my own characterizations and stories. It's a bit like writing Supernatural*, Twilight, or Hazbin Hotel fanfics. I don't support the guy, monetarily or otherwise, he does not interact with fanfics, I have plans to be very vocal that I'm on Shelby's side no matter what/make it clear that what Will did is wrong, and I don't use his real life events as plots in my stories. At least, I certainly don't try to. It's why I typically change traits about the characters. (I.e. Tommy is shorter, Phil is taller, Techno is bulky, and Wilbur always has golden/hazel eyes.)

I'm aware that it's a tad different because it's rp and not something like a full on book or an actor in a movie, but DSMP has also been over for over two years and the characterizations I make for SBI are not at all based on the CCs. Real life Techno isn't a literal terrorist, Phil ain't a father married to a goddess, Tommy is not a traumatized child soldier, and Wilbur isn't suicidal and blowing up countries.

I think I'll likely focus more on Techno, Tommy, and Phil for a while, but I'm not gonna let one dude ruin a fandom and things I've made for myself. Nothing I write is ever made for Wilbur, as I've seen people saying. Additionally, Wilbur was not the only writer. Technoblade, Philza, TommyInnit, and so many others made that story what it was. Not him.

However, if any CCs come forward saying they don't want their old characters interacting with his, I will respect that.

Though I do think there is a tendency to take real life events (i.e. Techno's cancer, LJ's music, Tommy's real life parents, etc.) and put them into fiction about DSMP. I, however, don't try to do that and have stated before that I don't feel comfortable doing so. The truth is that we have not gotten any genuine SBI content outside of DSMP for years. The dynamic in real life is very different from what was presented in the DSMP. Did personalities still bleed over? Yes, I'm not going to deny that, but I'm not going to act like they're exactly the same between character and person either. We've had that conversation like in 2021, it's why we have C! and CC!.

The rather sad truth is, SBI is what got me really into writing and it's a comfort for me that nothing can compare to. Obviously, I don't think it's appropriate to be writing certain types of stories right now or to be involving characters made by CCs outside of the DSMP. I think it's up to everyone else to decide on what they want to do, however, rushing it also isn't the way to go either. Give yourself time to heal and think it over first instead of throwing away something that gives you comfort and has not been associated with by the creators for over two years.

Anyways, fuck Will Gold. Fuck the fact that he hurt so many people, and fuck that he lied and manipulated his way around the damn internet. ESPECIALLY fuck the fact that he tried to diminish what he did and not take proper accountability.

Go and support Shelby so so much, she and everyone who spoke out really deserve it. I'm glad silence on these types of issues is not being normalized.

Here is a list of (American) resources for DV help:

TNLR

RAINN

WOAR

Love is respect

The Trevor project

Futures without violence

National domestic violence hotline

Resource on what DV and abuse looks like

*Changed it from Harry Potter to Supernatural because Harry Potter is a significantly worse and more problematic franchise, even just within the content of the books. It'd be better left in the dust. I've talked about it before, but it was the first thing that came to my mind at the time and was a poor comparison on my part, I'm truly sorry for that.

[genevawrenn]

Fit & Bagi's conversation transcript about Philza and what ails him today (02/28/2024);

[/rp from 2 hours and 32 minutes in FitMC's VOD (2:32-2:42)]

FitMC : So have you heard any fofoca recently? Got any gossip, tea, drama? Anything?

Bagi : I haven't heard fofoca recently at least about me because I am waiting for y'know Tina to check her room, so we can have some new fofoca?

F : I see, I see, okay.

B : But um, do you know what's happening to Phil?

F : All I know, with Phil, ever since that stuff appeared on his shoulders he has been acting strange. His kids were both really worried about him. When I brought up a sensitive topic he seemed to get really upset with Tallulah, so I'm just—I don't think he is himself recently. Something is definitely bothering him or something's up.

Empanada : It's bad.

F : I don't know, what do you think? *Both read Em's sign.*

B : I agree with Empanada, it's really bad. Because Chayanne and Tallulah were really upset, like it didn't look like Phil. He seemed different, like maybe possessed?

F : Yeah, maybe, maybe.

B : With some disease, I don't know. And they ran away from him.

F : Which is definitely not normal.

B : That's really sad because Chayanne and Tallulah really really love Phil. And Phil looked like he was trying to get away from them. Going inside of dungeons alone and leaving them in the house. I don't know all weird, the weird thing about his shoulders, the purple thing on his shoulders, it looks like that crying obsidian you know?

F : Oh, wait a min—cause it's got like the purple in it?

B : Yeah, that glows a little bit?

F : Ramon do you have a crying obsidian on you? Put it on the ground, I just want to look at it real quick.

B : And I think they had one of those inside the lake, the little lake they have next to their house.

F : Oh interesting. It's like the same colour of purple.

B : Yeah. Do you think its a type of corruption or something? Like what happened to Slime when he was being—well I don't know...transformed by codes?

F : Oh, yeah. Mhm, I remember that. That seems to happen on this island, doesn't it?

B : Yea. Like a contamination or something.

F : Yea it could be a disease, yeah definitely he wasn't himself. *Looks at the obsidian again* But yeah, it looks the colour purple is almost identical to what was on him.

E : Crying obsidian sucks.

Ramon : So crying obsidian is toxic?

B : I don't think so. But maybe a piece of crying obsidian appearing at his place could mean something?

F : Hmmm, maybe.

B : It's not normal to have crying obsidian inside of lakes.

F : It's an unusual place for it to spawn.

B : Yeah, exactly. So it was put in there but, why? Just for decoration or different purposes? I mean it could be just decoration.

F : It's—it's a weird decoration if that's true.

E : I asked him on our birthday and he said its nothin'. I asked him why there was one in his pond it was there on our birthday.

B : Wait, Empanada, did he answer you?

F : He said it's nothing...hmmmm.

E : He said not to worry about it an its nothing :(

F : It must have some significance then it has too.

B : He said not to worry about, maybe it really...I don't know the meaning of this because I never went to the nether. Everyone talks about the nether but I was never there.

F : Yeah but crying obsidian is also useful for making weapons cause it can make respawn anchors which can be used as explosives.

B : Oh you remind me of something. Okay, okay let me try to remember this...Phil had a diamond backpack that the 'Federation' gave to him?

F : Yeah, yeah must be nice.

B : No but it's really weird because the Federation isn't giving anyone anything because they want us to buy stuff.

E : Chay burned it.

B : That was really weird because the backpack came with a letter from the Federation, but not sure if its from the Federation. And a really weird backpack, a diamond backpack and the bunnies are trying to sell us everything so it doesn't even make sense for them to give Phil a diamond backpack. They would at least charge something, like, give me at least a thousand coins for the backpack, I don't know.

F : So you are saying that Phil didn't get it from the Federation?

B : I think maybe its something else, not the Federation.

F : I didn't even think of that.

B : He got a backpack from someone because think about it, the bunnies they don't even give us free food. Every time we need food they aren't even giving us food. Why would they give us diamond backpacks, that doesn't even make sense?

F : You are absolutely right. Like, I didn't even think of that.

B : If you stop to think about it, the shoulders and the back was exactly the place he was contaminated. So maybe it's related to the backpack?

F : You are right, it was all over his back, I didn't even think of that.

E : I listened to Phil's and Lulah's convo and he said he did it to protect them from HIM

[Fit mutes and tells chat : You ever talk to someone and just be like 'I'm fucking stupid?' That's how I feel right now.]

B : Oh yeah, I remember that Phil said that he was trying to protect the kids from 'him'. And he said a couple times the word him but no one in specific that we know, I think. It was always 'him'.

F : But he specifically said 'him', right?

B : Yeah, don't know who 'him' is but he was talking about 'him'.

R : Tio Phil was being a little harsh on Chay and Lulah.

E : He got really mad at Tallulah.

F : You might be onto something Bagi, maybe it is some sort of like he is being possessed or something.

B : Here Fit, check this *gestures to Em's sign*

E : Called her a stupid egg HE WOULD NEVER

F : *Reads aloud the sign* Oh you are absolutely right, Phil would never call any of his children stupid. Something is up, yup.

B : So if you see Phil and he's kinda weird, that's probably what's happening.

F : Well I am glad we had this chit chat so we are both on the same page. Okay we need to be really careful.

B : If he needs anything, oh yeah, and we need to be careful that's right. Because we don't know what he is up to.

F : Cause yeah if he's berating his own eggs, insulting his own eggs, it could turn south very quickly.

*Ramon nods*

F : I'm worried, Ramon.

E : Don't ask him questions, he will think they told us more.

F : Never a dull moment on this island.

B : We should keep the kids safe. Chay and Tallulah can stay here if they need, they already know that but if they need anything they can come to us.

F : That's a good idea yeah, as long as they have somewhere to go.

B : I mean for now I really don't know if I can help Phil, so I am just trying to keep the kids safe.

F : That's the most important.

B : The real Philza would appreciate it.

F : Yeah, keeping the kids safe that is the first priority. That's good stuff, isn't that right you two? *Addressing Em and Ramon who nod.*

B : I think Phil needs to deal with it.

F : It's always something on this island, Bagi, it's always something.

B : There's always something.

[Bonus transcript between Fit and Ramon 3:09-3:12 relating to Philza's affliction]

Fit : Ramon.

*Ramon nods after they both teleport home from BBH's place*

F : When we were talking with Bagi about Philza it made me realise something. I remember, a long time ago, this was a few months ago, remember when I was dealing with all the black concrete? Like all the dark matter that was on the island?

I specifically remember Philza mentioning a thing. If I recall correctly, he mentioned something called the 'Ender King'. And I am starting to wonder if maybe that's what's been messing with him. Cause think about it; the crying obsidian, the obsidian, that's what you find in the End Dimension, right?

*Ramon nods*

F : This things called the Ender King...he thought he was seeing things and we thought maybe he was just imagining them—but now we can see there is something on him. Something we can see with our own eyes. I just wonder if it's related.

Ramon : So now it's not only in his mind?

F : Exactly cause at first we thought maybe he was just imagining these things but it's clear this is actually some sort of outside force. And that's why I am a little bit more concerned now. That's why I am way more concerned.

R : That sounds dangerous. Not only for him but everyone.

F : Yeah, cause if his behaviour towards Tallulah and Chayanne yesterday, or the other day, is any indication then this could be a problem for a lot of us. So we really gotta keep our eye on him and support him anyway we can.

F : *sighs* But, man, when it rains it pours. Cause we have our own problems to deal with, Ramon. Especially tomorrow, I mean Friday. I can't ever remember what day it was, I am so frazzled. So much going on at all times on this island. When it rains it pours.

[blueishspace]

The Watchers court p4

Martyn: Court is back in session!

BigB: Who is the witness?

Martyn: Right, Philza Minecraft.

Grian: The Hardcore guy?

Martyn: Yeah.

Pearl: That one guy that looks like he's your cousin?

Martyn: ... Yeah.

Grian: Witness, have anything else to add about yourself?

Phil: No.

*in the jury*

Kristin: Oohhh! It's Phil!

Squiddo: Oh! Who's that?

Kristin: My husband.

Squiddo: I see!

E1!Jimmy: I miss my husband Squiddo, I miss him a lot.

Squiddo: What happened to him?

E1!Jimmy: He killed himself to stop his evil brother.

Squiddo: ...oh.

Phil: So?

Grian: Right, prosecution you may begin with your examination.

Tubbo: PhilZa.

Phil: Toby. It's been a while.

Tubbo: Yes ... Well, this isn't about us, It's about Dream.

Phil: What about him?

Grian: Prosecution wanted you as witness to Dream's stalking in the past.

Phil: Oh I can do that. You see, Dream here is a son of a bitch. One day I see Tommy running to my base which is weird considering Doomsday and Dream is running after him like a psycopath.

Tubbo: He was running after Tommy?

Phil: That's what I got from it, apparently Tommy was searching for something in his exile place and Dream was there and started running after him.

Tubbo: So then, was Dream waiting for Tommy?

Phil: I think so mate, why?

Tubbo: Then, he probably must have been following Tommy for a while right?

Punz: Objection! Leading the witness!

Tubbo: How do you think he could have known that Tommy was going to be there?

Phil: ... He was probably following him before that.

Punz: And- well, how could you possibly know he was running after him.

Phil: Because he was after Tommy. And he was running.

Punz: Well, what if Tommy was hiding something about the story?

Phil: Could have been a possibilty if Dream hadn't done the same before.

Pearl: Wait wait wait. He did something similiar before?

Phil: Techno said so, he would go near our base and observe like a creep.

Punz: Well... well, he could have been lying-

Phil: Techno would not lie to me.

Punz: ... But.

Phil: No.

BigB: Ehm, well... Does the prosecution have anything else to add?

Tommy: Oh? Uh... no?

Tubbo: I do.

Tommy: You do?

Tubbo: Tommy ...maybe It's best if you sit this part out.

Tommy: Oh... yeah I'll just go now.

Pearl: What was that about?

Tubbo: I call ... *sigh in disgust* The Warden to the witness stand.

Sam: Oh? Where am I? Tubbo what are you doing-?

Tubbo: I don't want to hear you, don't waste time.

Sam: Why are we in a courtroo- DREAM!??

Tubbo: That's why.

Grian: And why is he here?

Tubbo: I'll explain bossman. He is here as witness to Dream's murder of Tommy.

*the watchers in the crowd oohs, Dream's knuckles are white in stress*

Sam: Tommy was visiting the prison when it happened.

Tubbo: What did?

Sam: Ranboo.

Tubbo: ... What.

Sam: Ranboo triggered the prisons defences and caused the prison to go into lockdown.

Grian: Lockdown? What is that?

Sam: The prison locks to lower the chances of the prisoner escaping.

Punz: And did it work out? *Smirks*

Sam: ... It did not.

BigB: Go back to the murder? Please?

Sam: Right.

*In the jury*

Kristin: You don't mind if I tp Phil here do you?

Voice of The Star: No?

Kristin: Perfect!

Sam: I didn't notice it at first but a fight started...

Tubbo: A fight?

Sam: Well, it was extremely one sided... Tommy must have angered Dream because he started beating him.

Pearl: And he died?

Sam: Yes, it was...

Tubbo: You don't need to describe it ... And do you have tape of it?

Sam: Yes, yes I do. I register everything in the prison.

Grian: ... Taurtis?

Taurtis: Getting the video!

Grian: Thanks... And Martyn.

Martyn: I'll go grab Tommy.

Martyn: And that concludes the witness testimonies.

Grian: Finally, that lasted forever.

Pearl: C'mon mate, It wasn't that bad.

BigB: Well It's finally over.

Jimmy: My hands hurt from writing.

Martyn: Jury? Have you come to a decision?

*in the jury*

Squiddo: Definitely guilty.

Kristin: Guilty of course.

Knight!Grian: I found the defendant... guilty of all counts.

Voice of The Star: Oh yeah, he's absolutely guilty.

E1!Jimmy: GUILTY!

Martyn: Dream Was Taken, you have been found... GUILTY!

Dream: Ugh. Punz, what did I pay you for!?

Punz: It's not my fault-

Pearl: Order!

Punz: ...

Martyn: What are you sentences your honours.

BigB: I sentence Dream to be stripped of his admin and mod status which will be given to Philza Minecraft in the meantime.

Dream: ... no.

Pearl: I sentence the defendant with 6 lifetimes in the void cells and 10 lifetimes of mandatory therapy.

Dream: ...No!

Grian: And I sentence him with the redistribution of his assets and propery between Tommy and Tubbo as well as a fine of 5 stacks of diamond blocks to the court for making us waste time on this. We also have proof of you possessing a revival book, the book will be taken and your memories of It's working erased. Lastly but not leastly... You will be made immortal for the duration of your sentence to fully experience Pearl's punishment.

Dream: NO!

Tommy: FUCK YEAH! TAKE THAT GREEN BITCH!

*Two Watchers drag Dream away*

BigB: Well then... court is out of session.

Prev Next First

[missycolorful]

The scene with q!Forever and q!Philza at Global spawn in Pugatory is something that will always kinda sit in the back of my head. Because it truly, truly solidifies the strength in their dynamic, and neither of them will probably realize it lol. Hello, I'm here to be insane about q!philever, so buckle up

Like everyone else, q!Phil was dealing with a lot in Purgatory. He began to lose trust in close friends. He wasn't sure he'd even be able to save his children. While trying to uphold his morality and not kill except in self-defense, he was very much walking a fine, jittery line. All while trying to keep his team organized and motivated. Aside from kind of losing his mind like the others, there was no clear indication that Phil's composure was dangling by a loose thread.

But then he's allowed a moment of peace to exchange information with another team. It's just him and Forever. No kills planned, nothing. Just two people allowed to talk about the absurd situation they've been thrown into. A moment to really take everything in.

During the conversation, Forever doesn't hold judgement toward Phil or anyone else due to the event, even when he comments on Philza's kill on Rivers. Even when Phil tries to justify his actions, Forever doesn't hold it against him. It's hard to say exactly how important this is to what happens next, but I feel like it means something here.

It's when q!Forever says that once they leave Global Spawn, that they become "enemies" again, this is when q!Philza breaks. And I think this moment has been glossed over by many (I want more fan art, dammit >:T) cause it doesn't feel big on the surface. It's not like cc!Philza genuinely sounds heartbroken, his cries sound... a little exaggerated/dramatic, you know? What he cries about isn't anything groundbreaking, it's what many of them feel ("I don't want to be here." "I don't want to kill my friends."), even though Phil fans can sense a deeper meaning here. And after Forever briefly consoles Philza ("Everything is going to be good. This is what we need to go through."), Phil, like a flick of a switch, is right back to his composed, level-headed self. It was like that moment never even happened.

But it did, and it drives me crazy that he did it in front of Forever. cc!Phil made that conscious choice to have his character lose composure, his character that he and his fans knows is an emotionally constipated motherfucker. And the reason it drives me nuts is because how the fuck did we get here?

I can imagine this scenario with lots of characters, and it never plays out like this (i.e. with Tubbo, he'd likely just keep it all in. Et cetra.). I don't see him letting himself be this vulnerable around most others. Hell, before this, I never would've imagined he'd do this in front of Forever, either.

But the more I think about it, it kinda makes sense.

Phil and Forever's relationship is a funny one. Early on, Phil wouldn't trust Forever with a toothpick. He'd never be emotionally open with him. Forever even held a bit of animosity toward Philza after Phil'a final rejection. But that rocky start is honestly a huge part of why it is as strong as it is now. Cause, well, the strength of any relationship comes from accepting all parts of a person. Flaws and all.

Some characters hold Philza up on a pedestal (i.e. q!Missa). They don't really see his flaws. They don't think about his ugly sides. They just see a pillar of a man who is always willing to help, who can do anything and everything, who keeps composed and lighthearted and level-headed in any scenario. q!Forever was kinda like this, at one point.

But Forever realizes that isn't the case eventually. Because Phil's not great at dealing with emotional situations, and Forever learns that the hard way. Phil's not good at talking about feelings, he can be blunt and a bit harsh, because he's a pragmatic sort of guy. But it takes a softer, gentle approach to reject someone, and Phil wasn't ready for that. So, in retaliation to the hurt Phil caused him, Forever had a conflicted relationship with him. It didn't last long, but I digress. This brief shift in their relationship was for the better. By not placing him on this pedestal anymore, Forever began to see Philza in a different light. One that didn't cast Brunim in its shadow.

With Philza, Phil saw Forever at, arguably, his worst in the beginning. Obsessive, threatening, clutching onto a pipe dream with no regard for Phil's feelings. But over time, Phil got to see the much more real sides of Forever. When Tallulah lost her first life, when Forever made NINHO. He saw a passionate and intelligent side to this guy who was obsessed with him, and he respected that person. And with this recognition, he offered his trust to Forever, such as giving one of his presidential votes to Forever.

Both of their perspectives for the other changed throughout the first few months, and I believe they gained some level of appreciation between them because of that. They share this newfound respect and trust. And that is the core to their new relationship. Consistently, Forever and Phil have given each other open and mutual respect and trust. Never is either of these things taken for granted, abused, or manipulated in any way.

When Forever is hooked on the happy pills, he subconsciously seeks out Philza's help, which Phil offers with ease. Before Forever goes to the Nether, Phil expresses his worry and wants to help. But he doesn't push, because he respects Forever's agency, and trusts that Forever is doing what he thinks is best. (also during this scene, when Forever gave him access to the warpstone in that secret part of his base, only Forever and Richas had access to it beforehand, which feels like a big moment according to his fans, so! :D). So when Forever returns to the Nether, while he doesn't believe Fit and Pierre when they say they tried to save him, he absolutely, 100% believes in Philza.

Because he knows Philza by now, and Philza knows Forever. Maybe not on equal levels, but still. After merely a few months, they've slowly begun to understand each other a bit more. So I guess it's only natural that they'd be more open around each other.

I'd even argue that this isn't the first time Philza lets down his walls around Forever. It just didn't happen when Forever was awake.

I wouldn't say that Phil talking to Forever while he was in a coma is the same level of vulnerability as the scene in Purgatory. Because Phil wasn't totally direct with his feelings, he sort of deflected (the story, banging the pots and pans, calling him an idiot, etc). Hell, even when he is expresses how he feels, he's not entirely direct: "We just really care about you. We wanna see you come back. You're making us worry." Like, of course everyone cares, but to say this as we when it's just the two of you obviously feels like a moment of vulnerability but not wanting to admit to it. Cause, hey, under different circumstances, he absolutely would've committed to visiting Forever in the hospital every day. Still, his very open worry did give off a sense that his walls were crumbling.

So with all of this, if Philza can meet with someone alone in practical hell, and that someone, a person he openly trusts and cares about, can look him in the eye and say "I don't judge you" on the things he's has done, maybe that allowed the floodgates to open for a bit. Maybe once Forever said they'd be enemies outside those doors, the situation hit Phil like a truck, and he just couldn't keep it in anymore. And maybe knowing it was just the two of them, Phil knew he could be a person around Forever, not a leader or a mentor or a force to be reckoned with. And Phil really needs someone on equal footing with him like this. He needs someone he can feel safe around. So for him to find this in Forever, of all people, even if it's just for this moment, is extremely important to me.

The way their relationship has progressed, perhaps it would've been simply a matter of time for Philza to be open with Forever. I dunno when Phil will be quite so open around Forever again, but I do say when with a fair enough of certainty (or I could be wrong and I'm simply talking straight outta my ass but who knows). Because to have this moment with Forever was intentional, even if it feels like a blink and you miss moment. It may have been under a minute, it may not feel important to other viewers. BUT to me, it genuinely says so much about their relationship, how far they have come, and where they are now.

[rainbowchaox]

Purgatory Pissa Masterpost Part 1:

Look guys Missa hasn’t streamed again since day 1 of the event! So I was thinking to make it easier for artists and fic writers to remember canon moments. And I am HAVING thoughts. And feeling the need to yet again be “normal” about my favorite cubitos.

Let’s be honest. Philza was so happy to see Missa was online it was adorable. In Philza POV he practically started the zooming into Missa from the top of the wall. HUSBAND SPOTTED! And the amount of joy between them seeing each other again! THEY MISSED EACH OTHER SO MUCH!!!

Then Missa! Finally got a little brave and practically demanded Philza to give him a HUG. And guys I squealed watching it live. And philza immediately GAVE his husband a hug. And then tubbo immediately was like “are you guys gonna kiss and shit?” And PHILZA broke. Like HMMM why you hesitating why the confusion. Like DO YOU WANNA KISS HIM YOU REPRESSED CROW-

Then we also have to talk about THAT scene. The scene where quite frankly Missa just stared at his husband pecs as Philza canonically flexed- causing Philza to quickly get shy. Missa is so down bad that even I was like “MISSA PLEASE!”. This is the same man in the same stream where he legit called a painting of Philza “papacito” which I learned is like the Spanish version of “daddy”. Which Missa was very judged by his own chat for. It was hilarious. Cubito Missa was a different breed of simping and yearning this stream. I wish I made all of this up, but nope IT HAPPENED CANONICALLY. AND THEY EXPECT ME TO BE NORMAL?!?

But what everyone should focus on the most is when cucurocho said quesadilla island was a paradise. Mr Simpfonia himself immediately agreed because and I quote “Philza is here”. THIS IS BIG! Because EVEN Missa knows the island is horrible. Chayanne is gone for Void Sakes. BUT ITS PARADISE TO MISSA BECAUSE HE LOVES PHILZA- I’m so normal about this dudes. Because even spiderbit can’t say the island is paradise because they met each other on the island, but Missa casually says it like it didn’t rewrite pissa warriors brain chemistry. Something something Philza is comfort and safety to Missa. He loves Philza so much. Truly a bleeding heart with loyalty so strong it’s titanium.

And can we all talk about how Philza when they were separated waved goodbye to Missa when Missa back was turned? Philza doesn’t show affection through words. But by actions. Something something he is already missing Missa. The tsundere crow. JUST ADMIT YOU LOVE HIM-

Also Missa before all of this showing off his aquarium apartment. And casually says “The point is so Philza doesn’t notice so we can stay close to him” BITCH ITS PHILZA AND MISSA FOR A REASON! Did you forget the double bed?!?!!!? Pissa love each other so much it’s slowly becoming a obsession. Not to mention mISSA in general hauntings Philza thoughts (dude checked the map to see Missa when he died-) we get it Philza you love him and are sad you got spilt up. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE YOU NEVER GET TO SEE YOU HUSBAND AND MISS HIM-

Another great moment is when Missa heard his own team mates saw Philza and immediately was possessive and protective DESPITE THEM ACTUALLY BEING ON ENEMY SIDES was like “No don’t hurt my man”. Missa wants his husband to be safe. And nice to know his possessive streak is healthy as ever. Philza is HIS man. I swear Missa we get it- YOU LOVE HIM. THEY MAKE ME CRAZY. And guys it was a experience watching Missa POV. Because he was ignoring all the death and chaos in the chat BUT the moment when Missa saw Philza die his whole face changed expressions. Philza was the only death he reacted too I ain’t lying.

Now for the best part of the stream, Missa causally entered the VC of red team. And I quote “I’m not part of your team but I wanna tell you I love you guys”. PHILZA IMMEDIATELY SAID I LOVE YOU BACK. Of course everyone else was suspicious of Missa being so nice and called him a manipulator while Philza immediately was like “No he wouldn’t do that”. PHILZA TRUSTS MISSA SO MUCH-

LIKE WE UNDERSTAND! You guys are always on each other minds. We were fed so much! And I can’t wait to see what other cute pissa moments we get in the future- I hope you enjoyed my rambling essay. I feel like there should be a masterpost of pissa moments in case anyone needed a refresher! Will make Part 2 once we get more cute pissa moments!

[factorialsotherfandoms]

Philza comes with his evidence backpack, and Cellbit wants the ground to swallow him whole. Too much, its too much, he can't-

"Is now a bad time?" Philza asks, concerned but voice still light. "I can come back Friday?"

"No," Cellbit sighs. "No, I guess... Just..."

He waves a hand in a direction, and hopes Philza can make some sense of it.

"..." Philza doesn't move. "You alright mate? You seem a bit... off?"

"I'm just tired," Cellbit replies. "I just..."

Does he say, does he not? Philza has been one of his few defenders on this island, trusting him even when there's been nothing to trust, thinking on his wavelength and beside him.

He has to, doesn't he?

Cellbit can't make this sort of decision and tell anyone.

"I'm stepping down," Cellbit says. "From investigating. Cucurucho... I'm not working for the Federation, but I can't keep working against them either. Can we just... I'm sorry, I'm sorry I can't be what you need me to be."

"You're not? But-" Philza's brow furrows, and Cellbit fears the yelling he heard in the maze.

He didn't hear the words, but he heard the tone; he knows he is too exhausted to survive that.

"Please, Philza," he says. "Let it rest. The Federation, the Order... I have no part in them any more. Good luck. I hope you find what you're looking for someday."

There is a long pause and Cellbit thinks, maybe, that the silence is worse than the yelling could ever have been.

"Alright," Philza's voice is gentle as he deflates. "Alright... I understand."

Cellbit expects that to be that, watching Philza put the evidence bag away. It stings more than he thought it would, but even that struggles to bring him strength through the haze. He has failed Philza - failed everyone - in giving up. So of course he is now turned away. He knows he's only wanted for what he can give, why did he expect different?

But then the bag is gone, and Philza is still there. He reaches out, takes one of Cellbit's hands, and cradles it in his own. Calloused hands are soft and gentle, and Cellbit understands why so many on the island call him father.

It doesn't feel as teasing any more.

"Are you safe?" Philza asks. "Cucurucho isn't going to come down on your ass, is he?"

He is. Cellbit cannot answer - he just wants to sleep.

But maybe none is needed, because Philza's grip tightens a little, before thumbs start to smooth over Cellbit's knuckles.

"Fuck," Philza says, then he breathes. "Alright. We've got you, King. If anything happens, I'll be there as soon as I can. Don't worry about that dumbass bear, okay? No matter what there are people here who love you, and we will save you."

Cellbit closes his eyes, and nods, and tries to be strong again. He opens his mouth, and-

"None of that," Philza interrupts. "I do it because I want to. Now, when's Roier coming to bed? I don't really want to leave you alone right now, mate."

There's something in Philza's tone, but Cellbit doesn't care to interpret it. Instead he shrugs, "not sure. But really, I'll be fine. I just need to rest."

"I'll bet," Philza looks almost heartbroken as he says it. "Let's get you somewhere safe, then. You good to warp to my place? Phil and Missa?"

"Why?" Cellbit manages to ask as he takes out his warpstone.

"I'm not going to ask you to show me your bedroom, Cellbit. I can make choices about my privacy, not yours."

It sounds so obvious like that, but it's not quite the question he meant. Still, Cellbit just follows along. It's easier, far easier, to just get whatever this is over with so he can get home and to his bed.

He warps and, as soon as he arrives, Philza takes his hand again. He's led to the hatch, and down - "be careful on the ladder" Philza reminds him - to the children's room. Then, not content to leave him there, Philza takes him to the right, through another two security doors - its not hidden, but its certainly protected - to a room all in orange. Around the walls are photographs, and there's an enchantment table in the centre, but Cellbit does not really think of that.

"This is Chayanne's room," Philza smiles sadly as he says it. "But, I'm sure he won't mind. Here, if we just-"

Cellbit tries to make a response, to compliment it, to offer condolences, but instead he is led to the side of the stairs, and then beneath them. Tucked away there, in the dim, behind five security doors and still hidden, is a heap of mattresses, covered in blankets and pillows and even the odd bean bag.

"Get yourself comfortable," Philza pushes him a little towards the pile. "I just need to adjust the doors. Make sure Roier can get in, and Felps. Pretty sure Fit just lets Pac and Mike in anyway. And Forever," Philza's breath hitches very slightly, almost inaudibly. "has access anyway."

Philza hurries off, and Cellbit remains where he was left. He doesn't need the mothering, he is sure, but- But maybe it is nice, to not have to think.

He thinks so much, for everyone, what's wrong with this?

Soon enough Philza is back, carrying two bowls of something.

"I've let Roier know where you are, and Felps as I saw he was awake," Philza says as he passes over a bowl. "I know I ain't your family, but hopefully... Anyway, Chayanne made these before he vanished, always was a better cook than me. Just heated it through - I'm sure he wouldn't have minded it being shared."

"Are you sure?" Cellbit asks. "This is your son's? I'm not-"

"Eat," Philza is a little more pushy this time, even as he sits on the mattresses himself. "You're family, if you want to be. A bit extended, but aren't we all? Forever is my family and he's also yours, and that makes us family too. By some definition, anyway."

"Oh," it's said so simply, and Cellbit has no mind for a puzzle right now. Instead he takes the bowl of soup, and he drinks it.

They eat in silence and, once done, Philza tucks both of the bowls away. Cellbit is nudged again towards the mattresses as Philza cleans up, placing his hat and his coat beside the nest.

Great, ruined wings shudder a little to escape their hole, and despite the feather growth over them Cellbit can see the scars still deep in the flesh, the unevenness where muscle has been ripped away, how they shake with the effort of holding themselves up.

He feels like he needs to do something, to have some response to seeing such fantastic wings laid low - or perhaps to the trust shown to him in their display - but he's just...

He's just tired.

Philza is a little unsteady as he, too, comes into the nest. He shifts the pillows and the blankets and opens his arms and Cellbit- Cellbit can't.

He can't be being offered this, he barely knows Philza, he can't be trusted this much, not when people so much closer to him don't. It feels like a lie, a kind one at that.

"Come on Cellbit," Philza says. "I don't have all night; some of us sleep at reasonable hours, you know?"

"It's not unreasonable," Cellbit manages to retort, even as he gives in.

Stone crumbles to the wave, in time; Cellbit pulls off his outer layers, and slowly climbs into the nest.

Crawls into Philza's arms.

The arms close around him, and ruined wings hide him from sight.

"There we go," Philza whispers. "You've done well, more than enough. Just rest now, mate; I'll keep things ticking over in the meantime."

Cellbit doesn't want things to stay 'ticking over', he just wants them to end. Part of him knows he doesn't really, that he'll want those things later, if only because Cucurucho /will/ betray him, and Forever still isn't home, and its only with them carrying on that anyone he loves will be safe.

Philza runs a hand through his hair; Cellbit's thoughts still.

It's a little while before either of them speaks. To his own surprise Cellbit is the one to do so, with another childish feeling question, another "why?"

"Because I trust you," Philza replies. "And if I trust you, I care about you. If I trust you, you are my flock, and it fucking sucks right now, but we take care of each other. You're alive? That's /all/ I need from you, mate, just for you to stay alive."

Cellbit wishes it was that simple, he really does.

"If I'm here, your house isn't safe," he tries to reason, unsure why he's even fighting it now.

Philza holds him a little tighter, "if my flock safe, what's the point of a house? I'd take you to the real nest, but human lungs don't like being that high for long."

Real nest? Cellbit didn't think Philza had a secret base. It's a better kept secret than most on the server, it seems. To even know it exists, and presumably in the sky...

The idea is crushed by exhaustion, and apathy, and a desperate, desperate need to sleep.

Fingers brush in his hair once more.

"I've got you," Philza says. "Get some rest, mate; nobody will hurt you here."

And if they do, Cellbit has no doubt Philza's scythe will find its way into their eyes.

He curls up, presses his head to Philza's chest, and desperately tries to sleep.

[mossy123302]

Ah yes ...more au thoughts..

Philza, the Angel of Death, who roamed the earth and knows many stories. He has watched Kingdoms fall, risen or watched communities band together and perish upon corruption in their system.

He used to join such a community, when he had his friend beside him, but ever since his friend had ascended. Philza was alone, once more, to roam this plane and simply ride the wave of this never ending changing of time. Soon, he found himself joining an arena, to simply fight. It paid him well, and it gave him something to do at least so Philza didn't mind...

Until they had grown bored of him. So they assigned Philza to keep guard at one of a nearby village that held criminals or elderly people. Philza didn't know why such a village was created to dispose of the elderly, he understood the criminal part but not the wise people. They could share knowledge and expand what the new generation could fix and change.

But... Phil was too tired. He just agreed, took his next pay and headed off. It would be peaceful, compared to the roars of cheering and adrenaline of fighting...but it'll give Philza time to reflect on what else he could do, maybe think of a new project? He could build something, it has been a while since he built something.

Philza was content at his new station, just having to watch over the people, help them when needed and just make sure the prisoners don't escape. It was peaceful and...not many bothered him, probably because they were too afraid to get close. Who would dare even approach the Angel of Death himself?

A certain gentle soul did.

"Hi!" A voice greeted, and Philza paused as he looked up from his journal, which he was writing in to jot down his project ideas. He was greeted by the sight of silver eyes that reminded Philza of the stars, and long black hair that gently smoothed out over the man's face. It was like Philza was staring at space itself...

"Hello" Philza greeted in return, as he eyed the man who beamed at Philza's greeting. "...Sorry, I didn't realize there was someone else assigned here"

"Oh! Oh no no, pues, si- No wait- I'm not.... Okay! I'm just more or less a caretaker! I'm helping my friend Roier take care of his abuelo!" The man said, obviously stammering through his words and mixing it with other phrases that Philza couldn't fully understand. He knew it was Spanish, a common language around here, but he never did have the chance to actually teach himself about it. He has heard of Roier...so at least the man wasn't lying, at least.

"My name is Missa!" Missa finally said, clearly embarrassed.

Missa?

...

Oh.

Philza tilted his head, his eyes lighting up slightly. "Oh, you're the new recent grim reaper sent by ...the other deity of Death" He said. Missa faintly smiled at Philza's words and nodded. "That's me!" He said.

"What brings you here then? Is Roier's...abu...uel..abuelo?" Philza slowly said, trying to pronounce "abuelo" correctly. "Is he ..."

"No! Nono! He's not dying, well, not yet at least. No, I'm just here to help a friend and to visit you!"

"visit...me?"

"Ahh...qué pena... Haha, I've... I've been watching you, or well, following you for a bit. I've... I've been seeing your fights in the...arena" Missa admitted, his voice slightly high pitch as he awkwardly looked around to hide his face that was turning purple. He didn't dare look at Philza in the eyes, in fact, Missa shuffled in his satchel that he had and pulled a skeleton mask on.

Philza slowly blinked, his eyes slightly widened in surprise at the sudden confession from Missa. "...Well, mate, I don't... Thank you?" He said, quietly chuckling as he watched Missa shuffle around awkwardly.

Missa let out a squeak, when he suddenly lost some balance due to a hole in the dirt trail, almost tripping over it. Philza faintly smiled, as he looked at his journal.

...Maybe having company wasn't so bad. Missa seemed blunt, found his...strength incredible and he was a grim reaper, someone who would not ascend nor die so easily.

"...So you find me strong?" Philza asked, and Missa paused. He glanced over at his shoulder to look at Philza and slowly nodded. "..Yes..?"

"Marry me then.."

"QUÉ?!"

Philza suddenly took Missa's hands in his own hands, not giving the poor skeleton a chance to even pull away. He had an determined glint in his eyes. A glint that Missa was familiar with when he saw those arena fights, the way Philza fought and moved, moving like he was dancing and how he smiled when he won a battle.

"You find me strong, you know of me. I can provide whatever it is you need" Philza said, as Missa's face turned more alarmingly purple.

"esperate!! ESPERATE! We just started talking—!" Missa quickly said, trying to bust the whole situation down right now.

"I'll be your strength, but should you refuse me...I will still like to court you regardless" Philza casually replied.

"OKAY!" Missa shrieked, as he tried to pull his hands away and cover his face, he knew that his skeleton mask would do nothing now to hide his purple face. He jolted when he heard Roier's whistle behind him, and he whirled around to yell at his friend.

Philza blinked and softly smiled. He was going to enjoy learning about Missa...

It was no surprise, but Missa wanted Philza to relax. He wanted to be the one to provide everything for Philza, while Philza continued to do his own hobbies like sculpting, fighting or working on his projects. In fact, because of this, Philza was able to lighten up the village a bit more and figure out which soil was more suitable to start a farm on. It wasn't ideal how far the farm would be, but Missa didn't mind as long as Philza was resting.

In fact, Missa slowly started to bring materials for Philza to sculpt with. Materials that Philza knew what it stood for... to make a child.

Death related creatures couldn't create life so easily, it was a long process.

They needed materials. This varies on what's around them, in their environment. Things that Philza can sculpt, cut down or change to make sure that the materials fitted correctly together and slowly the materials started to mold and change that resembles an egg.

When that process is finished, Philza and Missa would need to stay together with the newly created egg to infuse their magic to the egg. It was simple, yet the process takes a while because it never guarantees that it'll work the first time. Philza and Missa have never done this before, so they didn't really expect this to work on their first try.

But when the egg started to move..

Philza and Missa knew that this little egg is a fighter, a strong willed one.

..Chayanne was his name.

[itslouisan]

Q!Philza headcannons:

I woke up and well, I'm feeling silly wanting to talk about Q! Philza since in my opinion he is one of the most complex characters in the QSMP, but also after the confirmation he is the same Philza as in hardcore, EarthSMP and DSMP, with the only exception being origins SMP (despite me having a headcannon about it and a whole timeline where all of it ties together) I thought, why not just show some of my headcannons since I kin this bitch way too much to point of Insanity and he is my comfort character and streamer, shall we?

Under the cut for a LOT of Q!Philza hc:

• First of all Phil has multiple scars from battles, it's confirmed he used to go to wars and with all the lore of the DSMP, QSMP and so on, I imagine he has a lot of them especially in his back and arms with occasionally 1 or 2 near his eye

• Due to said scars he never takes his kimono/samue off, the only exception being intense training where he needs more body flow and lightweight and in serious fights for the same reasons, he probably feels too exposed, vulnerable and even "dirty" showing them off, traits crows also have (avoiding vulnerability that is)

• I'm just gonna brush it slightly on a CHARACTER (NOT streamer Philza) interpretation in his sexuality and gender, if you guys want I can go deeper into it but meh: he is bi and ace, more in the gray sexuality spectrum than anything and enjoying jokes about sex without actually needing to do it, he is a transmasc (FTM) and crowgender using he/him and crow/crow self pronuns. The fact I view him as bi and not as a straight ally (which I did before the QSMP) is due to the fact Q!Missa and Q!Fit were a thing, again I could talk more in depth about this but only if you want

• In my vision character Philza (once more ONLY character Philza) shows traits of having anxiety disorder, either social or just general and some traits visible in people with both ADHD and Autism, which makes me hc him as Autism level of support 1 (tiptoing around 1 and 2) and ADHD PROBABLY combined type (both inattentive and hyperactive)

• His safe food is avocado toast and any potato related food due to Techno.

• Has sleep issues due to constantly having nightmares of the events of the DSMP

• Has back issues due to spending MONTHS sleeping in a chair to watch over the eggs

• He doesn't necessarily views Q!Cellbit as a son, but I think he definitely likes Cellbit company and gives him a ton of advice seeing how Cellbit has massive need of a father figure to guide him through

• Paints his nails with Chayanne, Tallulah, Cellbit, Pac, Mike, Roier, Fit and Jaiden and uses this time to "fofocar" as much as he can with all of them.

• Doesn't like tea but uses it to calm down and heal injuries anyway

• Definitely Cellbit top costumer in his coffee shop and actually talks with Cellbit about brewing techniques (reference to their original duo name being "coffee duo" and irl Phil loving coffee and Cellbit too)

• Has a hardcore heart and Wither rose tattoos in each of the inside of his wrists.

[dreamsclock]

“So let me get this straight,” Techno deadpans, face perfectly straight, “you’re layin’ eggs.”

( HAPPY VERY BELATED CHRISTMAS @kenjo-arts !!! you wanted emeraldduo and dream interactions or one of your aus so i combined both ^_^ i Hope You like it AND THANK YOU FOR BEING SO PATIENT. I LOVE U <333)

(THANK YOU @the-final-sif FOR RUNNING YHIS :])

Dream scowls. Under the glare and the shadow of his mask, his face is flushed. “Look,” he says, “I’m not— I didn’t even want to tell you. But–”

“But you did,” Philza jumps in, bemused, “I don’t really get why, though.”

If looks could kill, both members of the Syndicate would be dead thrice over. Instead, they remain unaffected as Dream’s cheeks turn warm enough to fry an egg – bad choice of words, Techno thinks, all things considered. He sure hopes Dream doesn’t actually fry his eggs: he really doesn’t want to get into the logistics of egg-infanticide with his dubious ally-turned-bestie.

Said bestie, however, is pulling out a clutch of eggs he holds protectively to his chest as if he expects Techno and Philza to snatch them away and begin jumping on them in malicious glee. When Philza moves closer in curiosity, Dream has a sword out before either of them can blink, unwavering and firm.

Philza raises his hands in surrender and lets out a little clucking noise. Techno thinks it’s supposed to be soothing. It sort of just sounds like a chicken. “Easy, mate,” he reassures, “I’m just looking. They’re pretty.”

“Obviously,” Dream says, half-preening, “they're mine.”

And they are pretty, Techno supposes, not that he cares much about eggs. They’re pale green and freckled with darker shades, five of them huddled in Dream’s arms. It’s impossible to tell what will hatch from them, though he sure isn’t thinking too hard about it. He’ll find out in due time, probably: one of them already has feather-light cracks speckling its side, while the others are pristine, unmoving.

…He doesn’t think he’s ever seen Dream so proud and protective over something of his before. He can’t decide if this is positive character development or not.

“I… wanted you guys to… like, hold onto them for me. For now.” Dream looks uncertain, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. In the pale light of the snow, his face is pale and drawn. “I will… come and get them. After tomorrow is over.”

“You mean the shit you’re pulling with Tommy.” Philza surmises, his expression flattening and tightening just slightly. He’s not forgotten the state Tommy had come to them in after exile: neither has Techno, who notices the way Dream’s shoulders straighten and his face grows deliberately impassive, when Philza’s anger makes itself known in the shape of one ruffling wing. “That’s tomorrow, isn’t it?”

“...Yeah, it is.” Dream allows, and says nothing more about his plans or his thoughts on the matter. Instead, he very gently and very carefully wraps the eggs in a blanket, swaddling the five of them so that only the tips of them are visible, before handing them over to Techno. His expression tightens into one of wistful yearning for a fraction of a second, before it disappears entirely behind that white porcelain mask. “I can’t take them with me, and… I don’t have any other allies. So. You know. We’re not exactly friends, but… I can pay you for it.”

Techno wants, for a wild moment, to pry the mask from his face and unearth Dream’s feelings about the eggs. His kids, he supposes.

He doesn’t do anything so lame or uncharacteristic. Rather than that, he accepts the bundle of eggs, handling them carefully, and– oh god, he cringes when one of them wiggles inquisitively. They’re warmer than he’d thought, thrumming with a quiet energy he faintly recognizes from the deepest, most inner parts of the server: which makes sense, considering they’re eggs from the admin of the SMP. Expecting anything less than slightly magical is dumb.

The aforementioned admin of the SMP shifts from foot to foot. He looks like he might grab the eggs back and make a run for it.

Taking pity on him, Techno clasps the bundle a little more securely, and offers his ally a firm nod and shrug. “Ehh, don’t worry about paying,” he says easily, “I just re-retired. I could do with somethin’ occupying my time. Even if it is five eggs.”

Philza squawks a laugh. “Never took you for a babysitter,” he teases, even as Dream relaxes fractionally, “what a career change. Never would’ve expected it.”

Techno shoots his friend a mock-glare. “I’ll have you know I have the credentials,” he says, haughtily, “you should’ve seen me before the Empire, Phil. You should’ve seen me. I was the pinnacle of babysitting, man. The pinnacle.”

“I bet.”

Dream whispers to you: so you’ll look after them for me??

When he turns to Dream, the man isn’t looking at him. He’s toying with the edge of his cloak, gloved fingers thin and shallow, and that’s when Techno realizes with a terrible clarity that Dream doesn’t plan on coming back for a long, long time.

His grip on the eggs tighten.

He’s hardly paternal, but he is loyal, to a fault.

You whisper to Dream: you have my word

And when Dream pearls away, leaving Techno with five eggs and a wonkily hand-stitched blanket, he knows it’s the last time they’ll see each other like this.

***

“Do you still have them?” Dream croaks in prison, throat slick with blood and voice hoarse from screaming. Techno wonders how long it’ll last before it gives out completely. Wonders if Dream’s voice might disappear entirely overnight. He barely uses it anymore.

“The eggs?” Techno asks, and his lips press when Dream nods. “I mean, not— not with me, Dream. Listen, I’m no Dad Of The Year, but I know not to bring five hatching eggs into a prison, alright. Jeez.”

Dream misses the rest of his ramble. His eyes light up for the first time when Techno speaks. “Hatching?” He repeats, as if he hardly believes his own words. “Like— You mean hatching hatching. Actually hatching.”

“No, no, the fake hatching.” Techno can’t keep the amused grin off his face despite his sarcasm. “I mean, they were pretty cracked when I left for here. They’re not about to start dancin’ around, but there’s not long now. Probably.”

The expression on Dream’s face is one he’s never seen before. It’s strange, wild. Hopeful.

“Okay,” his ally-turned-friend says, “okay. My eggs are hatching. So we’ve gotta get out of here.”

The firm tone is a switch from the hollow desperation he’d yelled at him before. (You were my only way out of here!) There’s determination, now, there’s reason to escape: reason, Techno knows now, for Dream to fight.

So he pushes an empty book across the scorch-marked obsidian to Dream, and offers a nod and an instruction. “Write down everything you can about this prison, Dream. I’m gonna need it if we’re breakin’ out of here.”

Dream flashes him an almost-grin, and it’s thin and exhausted and bright, and Techno watches him pick up the pen, and start to write.

***

“So.”

Dream doesn’t even look up from his dead-eyed staring contest with the wall. He just flips his middle finger in Techno’s vague direction, a silent shut up, before letting his arm fall limply at his side again.

“Soooo.”

Dream’s eye twitches. “So what?”

“I feel like we should discuss naming rights.”

“We— what?”

“Well,” Techno reasons, “it’s kind of joint custody of the eggs at this point. Sure, you birthed them—”

“That’s not how—”

“You birthed them, but I stopped Steve from eatin’ them. And believe me, that was a hard task, Dream. Almost impossible. Steve put up a valiant fight. He almost had them.”

That gets Dream’s attention. Eyes narrowing, mouth thinning into an annoyed scowl, he shuffles closer to Techno. Techno gets the impression he’s supposed to feel intimidated by Dream’s pout. “You let my eggs near a polar bear?” He demands, horror in his voice. “Techno. Seriously.”

“You remembered,” Techno beams, “you remembered Steve. Listen, you say we’re not friends, but this feels pretty friendly. I dunno. I’m just saying.”

“This— That’s not the point!”

“But no, I didn’t.Like I said, I won the battle. Steve fought hard, but I won. Good thing I’d been trainin’ so much recently. Any less and I think the eggs would’ve been breakfast.”

Dream’s eye twitches. “I don’t know why I even trusted you with them,” he mutters, antsy, “anything could happen to them.”

Techno scoffs, and offers Dream a trustworthy, reassuring look. “Dream, do I look like the kind of guy to let anything bad happen to your children?”

Dream stares dubiously back. “Yeah,” he says, “you do.”

…That doesn’t hurt his feelings, nope, not at all. He shoots his friend a pensive look. “When I get home, I’m gonna give your eggs to Philza,” he threatens, “he’ll put them in his nest. Don’t push me.”

“…You wouldn’t.”

“I would. Pass me another potato, nerd.”

The potato Dream throws at him bounces against his arm and clatters on the floor next to a splatter of blood. Techno wrinkles his nose. “Dude,” he says, “prison is lame.”

“Keep the eggs far away from Philza’s nests,” Dream warns, “or prison will get worse for you.”

***

You whisper to Philza: btw where are the eggs right now

Philza whispers to you: Why

You whisper to Philza: just answer the question phil

You whisper to Philza: where are the eggs right now

Philza whispers to you: They’re not in my fucking nest

You whisper to Philza: phil

Philza whispers to you: I’m taking them out of my nest and putting them back

Techno breathes a sigh of relief, and glances over at a fitfully sleeping Dream. “Crisis averted,” he mutters out loud, and then, “Chat, don’t be snitches. What Dream doesn’t know, won’t hurt him.”

***

And Techno’s not hurt when the eggs are the first thing Dream checks when he gets to the Syndicate. Pft, why would he be? It’s not like he’s the one that helped free him or anything, nah, course not.

“All I’m saying,” he grumbles to a cackling Philza, “is that the eggs didn’t sit in prison for three months with him. I’m not jealous, Phil. I’m not jealous. That would be crazy. They’re eggs. Not even that cool. But—”

“For fuck’s sake,” his friend laughs at him, “go inside and show him where his eggs are. He’ll be tearing the house apart looking for them.”

And Philza’s right. Dream is already pulling the chests apart searching for his eggs, as if Techno hadn’t stored them somewhere safer the very moment he’d escaped Pandora’s Vault the first time.

“Where are they?” Dream demands.

Techno nods to the wall. “I’ve been callin’ it the Baby Backrooms.” He says, proudly. “Though it’s kind of more of a Baby Hideout. Doesn’t sound as cool, though.”

A couple of swift strokes with his pickaxes tears open the wall, and reveals four large eggs, cracked but safe, huddled together in the corner of a light blue room. Dream’s gaze softens when he sees them, and steps inside, narrowly missing the bedtime story Techno’s been reading them most nights. Sun Tzu isn’t light reading, but hey, Techno’s determined to make incredible battle strategists of them yet. One of the eggs likes it the most: it wriggles whenever he pulls the book out, and he hates playing favourites, but he has to say, he’s got the most faith in that one.

“I’m back,” Dream breaks the silence to say to his eggs, kneeling down beside them and gently tracing the thick fractures along the curve of the darkest green one, “hey, hi, hi! Did you miss me?”

Techno doesn’t point out that eggs can’t talk for two reasons. The first is that he thinks Dream might actually murder someone if his moment with the eggs is disturbed. The second, slightly more alarming reason is that one of the eggs are missing.

When he’d left the room before, there had been five eggs in that room. The four now aren’t exactly inspiring him with confidence. Dream is really going to kill him if he’s lost a whole egg in the space of, like, four hours.

Dream scoops up the eggs, and turns to face Techno. There’s a look of relief on his face that’s so raw and unfiltered that it takes Techno a moment to recognise what he’s seeing. It’s like a part of Dream that had been missing during prison has been returned to him: Techno realizes with a pang that that’s exactly the case.

“I have a question,” Niki chimes in from behind them, “I have lots of questions.”

When Techno turns, she’s holding a tiny miniature version of… Dream himself.

“Mama,” it squeaks, reaching out to Dream, “Mama.”

Dream melts, right there and then.

***

“So… you laid this.”

Even someone blessed with the patience of a saint would have snapped by now. Dream, who is neither blessed nor patient, seems to be on the verge of murder someone: specifically, Tommy, who hasn’t stopped asking questions since he’d appeared at Techno’s door with questions. Four months had been enough time to solve the conflict between the server (…mostly), but it seems like Tommy’s boundaries don’t include tiny little green blobs like Dream’s newly hatched eggs running about the SMP.

“I already told you,” Dream says, “I didn’t lay them. They just appeared as eggs.”

“So you… make eggs,” Tommy says, “and then you like, you black out, and then you like wake up and find the eggs. Egg amnesia. Egg-nesia.”

Dream very visibly counts to ten in his head. Techno can’t stop himself from smirking and joining in.

“Yeah, Dream, I’m not gettin’ the science behind this whole thing,” he drawls, “can you explain it again?”

“You—” Dream splutters. A tiny version of himself with a green cloak travels by on one of the dogs, and throws himself into Dream’s arms. Dream cradles him absentmindedly. “We live in a world with a revive book and a randomly implemented three life system, and you’re confused about eggs?”

“I get it,” Tubbo says wisely, “sometimes every man reaches an age where he must lay an egg.”

“…That’s… actually not true,” Dream says, “most people don’t produce eggs randomly from thin air.”

“Who did you produce them with?” Tommy asks. “Was it George Not Found? Oh, that’s so weird. You’ve made it weird, Dream.”

“How have I made it weird? I—” Cutting himself off, Dream’s head perks up. “Hang on,” he says, “Philza’s trying to take one of my new eggs.”

Tommy’s face drops into total stupefaction. “It happened again?!” He demands. “When will the horror end?”

“What is wrong with you?” Dream groans, pushing himself to his feet and very carefully handing over his baby to Techno. “Look after Ray for me. I swear to God, if Philza is building a nest around my eggs again…”

He doesn’t finish his threat. Nevertheless, his warnings of violence are clear. Techno silently wishes Philza luck, and shifts his hold so that he’s juggling both the baby and the book in his other hand.

“I still think we should think about naming one of your eggs after me,” he says, “I was such a great babysitter. That’s why they turned out so great.”

Dream, halfway out the room, turns slowly, and gives him a very incredulous look.

“You think you were a good babysitter? So you think letting my babies play with Steve was a good idea?”

“They didn’t die,” Techno protests. “They were fine.”

“There comes a time where every man must fight a polar bear.” Tubbo says solemnly

“Tubs,” Tommy tells him, “that’s just not true. Wilbur just told you that because I wanted to see you be mauled horrifically by a bear.”

“Oh.”

“You could call one baby Blade,” Techno calls over Tubbo and Tommy. Dream laughs. “It’s not very creative, and a little hurtful, but hey, it sounds pretty cool, alright, it sounds pretty awesome. Or— Tech. I’d be fine with Tech.”

“I’m not naming a baby after you.”

Dream rolls his eyes as he walks out, but there’s a grin on his face.

You whisper to Dream: can i at least be godfather

Dream whispers to you: only if you gaslight tommy into thinking he was an egg once

You whisper to Dream: you drive a hard bargain

You whisper to Dream: it’s a deal

“Hey Tommy,” Techno calls out, “you remember being an egg? I still have pictures of you somewhere from before you were hatched.“

The look of absolute horror on Tommy’s face is priceless, and the knowledge of the title godfather makes him grin all the brighter.