#place is considerably brighter than they remember and in they can hear two faint voices in the background but theyre too preoccupied with

[dairyfreenugget]

(Going insane boinkinh one AU in my head)

Hey hey hey

May I interest you in

(Slowly slides my FaaF AU towards you but void just Disappears without a trace one day before the accolade)

Teehee

[herstarburststories]

Something About Pride

Summary: It's Pride Month! Dean tries to make sure you feel celebrated today, while Sammy has an inner dilemma about Castiel.

Pairings: Bi!Reader x Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester x Castiel

A/N: I had more alternative titles for that one (too in love to think straight and the gay angel), but this one fits a lot! A bit late, I know.

"Shouldn't you buy him a gift or something? It's like a full on gay Valentine's Day," Dean said in a husky voice, barely functioning in the light of morning as he prepared the daily coffee for him and Sam along with your cold lemon tea.

His little brother didn't bother giving him an articulate answer other than a mild glare at his back. (Y/N) simply rolled your eyes at your boyfriend's statement, a small grin on your lips. Dean could be simultaneously clueless, dumb and cute sometimes.

‘’I doubt Cass knows what pride month is, honestly.’’ You glance at Sam, resting your hand on his arm with a friendly smile. “But I think it would be cool if you somehow celebrated with him.’’ 

‘’Wait,’’ Dean interrupted the conversation, placing the coffee pot and your cup of tea on the table. ‘’Do you want to celebrate it?’’ he asked, suddenly worried about somehow being negligent on something important to you.

‘’Nah, I'm good. Being myself is all the celebration I need right now.’’ You grinned at him, withdrawing your hand arm to grab the cup full of chilled tea. It was adorable how caring Dean was. ‘’Besides, your gift this morning was good enough.’’

The wink you offered, followed by Dean's double-meaning smirk caused Sammy to huff lightly and purse his lips. ‘’Leave the weird kinks for the bedroom, guys. And more silently. I can hear.’’

His elder brother rolled his eyes and claimed the seat next to you. ‘’And I thought he would get some after he got with Cass.’’

‘’I think he would like it,” you continued after taking a sip of your tea. ‘’Maybe you could bring him to a parade?’’

‘’And explain him that pride month happens because people were killed and tortured for loving someone?’’ Sam replied, a hint of harshness in his voice. It was obvious he didn’t want to snap, but it could be a delicate situation when the brunette male thought about it. Castiel clearly knew that love has no boundaries regarding to gender — his angel nature and the fact that he had various vessels through the ages made him indifferent when it came to sex — but he probably wasn't aware that it hadn't been always like this on earth. Part of Sam didn't want to explain too much. For once, he wanted to make himself believe that not knowing could be a blessing.

You laid your eyes on him, a frown on your face. Dean was silent like he usually would be during conversations like this. Rather, he was pouring coffee for him and Sammy.

Sighing, the taller man tried to reason with himself. "I'm sorry, it's just — "

‘’It's okay. I get it,” you said, refusing further explanation. You remembered how nervous Sam was to tell Dean and how broken he was after realizing that John would never know part of what made him who he was. He was paralyzed, even, spine chilled with horror as he’d considered how his father could react. ‘’The accumulation of history, this heteronormative society. it’s buried deep inside everyone. It makes coming out necessary and scary, and even sometimes it backfires as if we were doing something wrong. Some people even tell us it’s something wrong, but that doesn’t make all that we have achieved any less important or beautiful.”

Dean's hand found your high under the table. It’s a soft squeeze and not in the teasing manner that you’re used to. His own little way of supporting you, of saying I'm here if you want to talk or drink about it. I have your back. He has been always supportive when it came to your bisexuality and his brother's sexuality. You pecked his cheek.

‘’I know, it is just…’’ Sam shrugged, his hazel eyes getting puffy. ‘’What Cas and I have — It's innocent. It's good. I don't want him to doubt it or something because of what a bunch of ignorant people think. Does that make sense?’’

‘’Cass has had the hots for you for years, dude. He didn't run away from us when he had to go against Chuck, go to the purgatory or when you offered him rabbit food. He won't leave anymore.’’

Although he coated his tongue with a humorous truth, it broke Dean's heart to hear the fragility in his little brother's voice. For as much as Castiel was his best friend, he was ready to punch the grace out of that angel if he hurt Sammy.

‘’He is right, Sam. Castiel wouldn't doubt your relationship for that. It's Pride Month. History isn't known for being pretty, but victorious. And we won.’’

‘’Sometimes I just wish we didn't have to fight,’’ Sammy said quietly, shrugging while he grabbed the cup of coffee to bring to his lips.

You gave him a solidary glare, an empathetic smile adding in your expression. You held his huge hand in yours, rubbing your thumb into Sam's palm.

‘’I know.’’ What was left to say? It was unfair as most things in centuries. It was revolting. But above all, it was changing. Love was finally being seen in every way. Things were slowly getting better. ‘’But we keep fighting, right? And we get something good.’’ You pulled away, drinking more of your lemon tea. Sam nodded, sniffling a bit while he recomposed himself. ‘’You could keep it simple if you explain, like…’’ 

‘’Tell him it is a full-month of exclusively gay Valentine,’’ Dean suggested, smiling genuinely at his idea and wiggling his eyebrows.

Sam sighed and you scrunched your nose, but had to agree with your boyfriend. That would be a good way to describe it to Castiel. 

‘’You could bring him to a parade or give him one of those tiny rainbow flags, like Captain Holt’s. It's cute!’’

Dean grimaced. ‘’Don't be that chick flick, Sammy.’’

‘’How is that chick flick, Winchester?’’ You arched your eyebrow, almost challenging him to continue.

The long-haired brother just chuckled at you two, rising from the chair with his cup in hand. He needed to think about Castiel and the whole month's explanation deal.

‘’All right, I'll let you two argue alone.’’

Sammy could hear the words that grow more quietly as he stepped away from the kitchen.

‘’Are you sure you don't want to go to a parade or something?’’

It brings an amount of pride that he didn't think he would feel, just like the joy.

Sam Winchester wasn’t the kind of man to get nervous mincing words, especially near his family. That was why he almost felt ashamed when the faint tremble in his voice became noticeable enough for even him to detect when he spoke to his boyfriend.

‘’So, Cass, I wanted to talk to you about something.’’

The hunter wanted to scream stupid at himself for the tiny frown on Castiel's usual tranquil expression. When Sam said similar words to the angel, it was most likely to be a life or death situation, or a Dean becoming a demon situation, or a Chuck about to destroy the world situation.

And he certainly wasn't this anxious when he first brought it up to his brother and you.

‘’What is this about?’’

‘’Full-gay Valentine's Day, but it's a month.’’ Dean arched his eyebrows, pursed lips parting into a proud smile. You slapped his arm. Unbelievable. ‘’What? You agree!’’

You held his arm and dragged him out of the room. Sam needed privacy. As you and his brother walked away between whispers, he let out a breath that he didn't even notice the holding. 

For a split of second, Sammy almost followed you two to bring Dean and his stupid jokes back to the subject.

The hunter coughed, but his angel lover just remained standing there; calm blue eyes waiting for his next speech, head subtly titled to the side because of his curiosity.

‘’Uh, Pride Month.’’

For his surprise, Castiel answered with a nod, ‘’The month of love, I believe? It is very colorful to see.’’

‘’You know what it is?’’ Sammy frowned in confusion, approaching his boyfriend with a soft smile. It was a weird relief. He wouldn't dare to tell Cass how some humans saw their relationship. Not that they mattered, anyway. But it'd haunt him how his lover could react. After all, Castiel was still considerably new to the human world as a dweller.

‘’Yes, I do. A month to celebrate romantic relationships,” the blue-eyed man said. Once he saw the look on Sam’s face, he quickly added, ‘’I saw it on the television.’’

‘’Yeah, it's, huh, kinda like that. But not fully.’’ He gave him a tight smile. Sammy was close enough to hold his hand, and so he did. God, it was possible to feel his body relax just with that mere touch. If Samuel didn't know any better, he'd theorize that he could sense Castiel's grace. But no, it must've been love in its purest form. ‘’It's important for relationships too, but it is mostly about self pride. Like accepting and praising part of who you are.’’

Cass intertwined their fingers, enjoying the way Sam's soul shone brighter to his closeness. It was such a majestic view.

‘’I was thinking, maybe we could go to one of them. Or just have a date. It's kind of our special month on earth. Well, the backstory isn't that nice, but — ’’

‘’Many things in humanity aren't, Sam. You are not a harmonic kind. Like bees,’’ Castiel said, butting into his human's babbling as he noticed how agitated his aura became. As if he was scared for some reason. Sam gulped, the prior anxious feeling crawling back in a bigger form. ‘’Although, it is an honorable celebration for a great cause. I would like to enjoy this with you.”

Sammy's mouth was open in a perfect shape of an O. Features echoing his mixed feelings of intrigue and shock, he had to make sure of what he heard by asking: ‘’You would?’’ 

‘’Yes, Sa — Honey.’’ The graceful being was still learning the perks of being in a romantic relationship. Pet names were a new thing to him, but honey was his favorite. Mostly because of its association with his favorite insect. ‘’We could go for one of the group walks on the street? The sensation to be there seems — ’’

“Freeing?’’ He smiled, pulling Castiel closer to his taller figure with a free hand. Not a worry in earth, hell and heaven catching his mind now.

Castiel curved his lips into a smile. It was tiny, but it was there, just like the hold on his waist. Would every move of his angel make him experience this peaceful embrace? He believed so. Perhaps that was the happiness that he found in the chaos of his life. That his brother found. And it was good. God, it was amazing. Heaven in one angel, just for him. 

‘’Exactly, like pride.’’ Sam's words come only to be soon replaced by his lips pressing against Castiel's in a kiss.

He felt so proud to love him. No one could take it away.

And they wouldn't.

Masterlist

Dean's Sweetheart: @akshi8278

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[ichigo-daifuku]

Lionheart

Fandom: Boku no Hero Academia Pairing: Amajiki Tamaki/Hado Nejire Genre: Fluff Word Count: 4.3k

Synopsis: On the day they met, Nejire told Tamaki he reminded her of an elf.

Now, as she glided in the air for her performance in the beauty pageant, Tamaki couldn’t help but think, Nejire is like an innocent fairy.

Tamaki has always had a faint heart when it comes to social situations, but when the perfect opportunity to convey his romantic sentiments to Nejire arises, he takes all the courage he can muster and confesses.

— Set during the U.A. School Festival Arc.

Tamaki has never liked crowds.

The presence of a large number of human beings in a definite space had a way of transforming his mind from organized to blank. If he had to say something to a companion or to an audience, more often than not, the words would die in his throat, and his frowning lips would tremble in a painful sensation called ‘awkwardness’. In the end, he wouldn’t be able to say anything correctly—or anything at all, for that matter. It was no secret that he avoided crowds as much as he could, however, today was an exception.

It was the day of the U.A. School Festival. Tamaki stood amidst the sea of people excited for the annual beauty pageant, feeling out of place but nevertheless, determined to support her, one of his dearest friends, Nejire. These days, with Mirio taking a break, his school days were spent mostly with Nejire alone. As they were in the same section, they saw each other in class and back in the dormitory, and being friends, they ate lunch and spent their breaks together. When Nejire submitted her entry for the beauty pageant, the preparation for the event took the majority of her free time. Along with their classmates, Tamaki was around during her practice sessions, witnessing her hard work and improvement. At times, hints of weariness marked her features, yet she never failed to wear a cheerful smile. As they walked side by side on the way back to the dormitory, she had a skip on her steps and chattered happily about anything and everything as usual. She remained energetic and bubbly, as though she wasn’t tired at all. It was one of the things he admired about her.

Beside him, Yuyu, Nejire’s best friend, observed the other girls vying for the crown with clenched fists. Class 1-B’s Kendo Itsuka was a strong competitor, having starred in a commercial with Pro Hero Uwabami. However, Nejire’s greatest rival would be Kenranzaki Bibimi, the girl who was aiming for her third win. Bibimi exuded flashiness in her performance, as everyone expected.

The crowd cheered when Nejire took the stage. The thought of standing in front of all these people and performing made Tamaki’s stomach churn. From afar, he gave her a thumbs-up, uncertain if any words of comfort would reach her but still managed to grit out, “Hado, people are just animals… Just think of them as mammals, and you’ll feel more relaxed.”

It turned out, Tamaki had nothing to worry about.

As the audience let out sounds of awe, Tamaki lifted his head and gazed at Nejire from below, entranced at the sight of her gliding in the air, creating an image of a rose with the use of her Quirk. All the while, she smiled and enjoyed the performance she spent weeks perfecting; effortlessly graceful and enchanting. To Tamaki, she looked like an innocent fairy, and he could almost imagine her butterfly wings sprouting from her back and fluttering as she moved.

She was beautiful.

The moment Nejire’s feet touched the ground, everyone clapped their hands and cheered louder than ever. After being crowned as the runner-up twice in the beauty pageant in the previous years, she shined brighter than anyone else this time.

Tamaki had no doubt that she would emerge as the winner later on, and with that thought, he smiled.

Tamaki would never forget the day he met Nejire.

It had been a sunny morning, but his mood couldn’t have been more opposite. Surrounded by fellow students admitted to Class 1-A, he wallowed in his gloomy thoughts, alone. Despite going through the application process and entrance exams with Mirio, the two of them were separated in the assignment of sections, a possibility which didn’t cross their minds when they began their journey to becoming heroes. Mirio laughed it off and said words of encouragement to Tamaki, but in truth, Tamaki thought Mirio gave him too much credit.

While his new classmates acquainted themselves, Tamaki sat quietly at the back. The seat next to his remained empty, and the view outside the window kept him company. Excited chatters of the possibilities the future would bring to the students who were part of the hero course filled the room. Unlike them, Tamaki dreaded his first day at U.A. High School, knowing that the nerves, the anxiety, and the memories of the time when he was a transferee in middle school would come back to him in full force. He sighed and buried his head on his desk, wondering how he was going to survive his stay in this school. Classes hadn’t begun yet, but he already wanted to go home.

The classroom door slid open, and a female voice chirped, “Good morning, everyone!”

A chorus of ‘good morning’ replied to the newcomer, but Tamaki paid them no mind. He shut his eyes and wondered if he had enough time for a nap to make up for the lack of sleep he experienced the night before; the mere thought of the awkwardness he was experiencing right now had been enough to keep him up for hours.

The sound of footsteps neared Tamaki and stopped in front of his desk. The newcomer patted his shoulder and said, “Hey, hey! Good morning! Are you okay? Are you feeling sick? I can accompany you to Recovery Girl if you’d like?”

Tamaki froze. There it was, the inescapable social interaction he had not been looking forward to. Slowly, he lifted his head and sat properly, rubbing his closed eyes with his fingers. “It’s nothing. I’m fine…”

“I see! That’s good to hear. What’s your name? I’m Hado Nejire, by the way!”

He blinked, his vision coming into focus and registering the curious eyes gazing at him. Every second passing led to the heat creeping up his cheeks to grow more intensely. The girl in front of him was clutching the handle of her school bag, her long hair neatly styled. Even from a considerable distance, Tamaki got a whiff of the jasmine-scented perfume she used.

She was pretty. Very pretty. 

He swallowed and took a moment to compose himself, not wanting to embarrass himself. “My name is Amajiki Tamaki.”

“Nice to meet you!” Her face broke into an innocent smile, and Tamaki felt like he was going to faint. “So, Amajiki… What’s your Quirk called?”

“Uh, Manifest.”

“And? What does it mean?”

“I can… manifest…” he cringed at his choice of words but continued, “the physical features of food I’ve eaten.”

Tamaki didn’t know how to explain his Quirk properly without him coming off as an odd person. Some people thought he was a ‘freak’ for possessing such an ability. He half-assumed that she would find him strange, but instead, she leaned closer in excitement, her eyes sparkling with even more interest.

“Oh, oh! Show me!” she said.

Though caught off-guard, he managed to reply, “Uh, okay.”

Tamaki raised his hand from the desk, unable to remember what exactly he had for breakfast as he had been too nervous to pay attention earlier. He did note that it was some sort of vegetable soup and was proven correct when a thin leafy vine erupted from the hollow of his palm, the stem still connected to his skin.

Nejire picked up the end of the vine, inspecting in closely. “Whoa! That’s amazing!”

“You think so?”

“Yeah!” She shifted her gaze to him, her eyebrows furrowing at something that caught her attention. With a small gasp, she bent down to peer at his face, her dainty fingers hovering closer to his ear. “Say, Amajiki, have your ears always been like that?”

Tamaki’s cheeks flushed, and he covered his ear with his free hand self-consciously. “I—uh, y-yes…”

He expected her to laugh at the way he struggled for words, but to his surprise, the sincere smile on her lips never faltered.

“Hm, I see…” She paused, deep in thought, and her eyes widened before exclaiming, “That’s it! You remind me of an elf!”

Tamaki stared at her with a confused expression on his face. “An… elf…?”

Nejire nodded and draped the vine she was holding over his head like a crown. “Yes, yes! See? Right there, an elf!”

“Huh?”

“I like you, Amajiki! You’re very interesting!”

“What?” Tamaki felt his whole face heat up to the tips of his ears. “You can’t just say things like that!”

“I can’t?”

Determined to change the subject he averted his gaze and muttered, “What about you, Hado? What kind of Quirk do you have?”

He was curious. Tamaki would bet anything her Quirk was a flashy sort; she was someone who stood out.

Nejire’s feet bounced in excitement. “My Quirk is called Wave Motion. Here, let me show you!”

She outstretched her hand, and a thin strip of golden light spiraled from her palm. For a second, he squinted, waiting for his eyes to adjust to the sudden brightness coming from her hand, and admired the way the light danced once he was able to see it fully.

“It’s a beautiful Quirk,” he found himself commenting.

“Ah, thank you…”

The peal of her laughter lifted his spirits, and at that moment, he was certain Nejire was another one of those who shined like the sun. As she occupied the seat next to his, for the first time that day, Tamaki smiled.

A crowd had formed around the newly crowned beauty queen as she stood in the hallway. Once Nejire had placed the crown, sash, and bouquet she received from the pageant inside her locker, she turned to thank her friends and acquaintances, all of them celebrating her victory.

Tamaki leaned against the wall by the staircase, content with staying on the sidelines, intimidated by the number of people surrounding Nejire. He would wait for them to finish and approach her after. From the looks of it, it would take a while, but he didn’t mind waiting.

Yuyu, who was standing next to him, said, “Make sure she enjoys the rest of the day, okay?”

“Huh? What do you mean by that?”

Instead of answering, Yuyu merely smiled and spun around. She navigated through the crowd to get to Nejire, tearing up once again as she congratulated her best friend. Nejire laughed, patted her friend's shoulder, and said something before whispering a question in her ear. Once she has received a reply, Nejire craned her neck, her face lighting up as she faced Tamaki’s direction. 

Saying their goodbyes, Nejire excused herself and walked his way. “There you are, Amajiki!”

“Hado…”

“Well?” she asked, a mischievous glint in her eyes.

Tamaki cleared his throat and said, “Congratulations, Hado. You were great out there.”

“I can’t believe I managed to do it!” She twirled in excitement, still over the moon at her victory.

“Of course, you did. You worked hard and practiced a lot, after all.”

“Thank you for coming to support me!” Nejire gestured to the staircase, giving him an expectant look. “Let’s go!”

“Go? Where?”

“To the festival, silly! Mirio, you, and I have always gone to the festival together since we were first years. It’s practically tradition at this point, right?”

“Yes, but Mirio is with Midoriya and Eri right now…”

“I know. I got to talk to them before they left. Did you see Eri’s smile? She’s so cute! Togata looks like he’s having a lot of fun with them, too. Anyway, it’s going to be just you and me this year, so let’s go on a date!”

“A d-d-date?!”

“That’s right!”

“Amajiki! Hado! Wanna go to the festival with us?” a classmate of theirs called from the distance, gathering other 3-A students who would like to explore the school festival together with the class.

Nejire shook her head and gave their classmates a wave. Yuyu whispered something to their classmate’s ear to which their classmate replied with a nod of understanding, waving back at Tamaki and Nejire’s direction and leading everyone inside their classroom to wait for the others.

“Come on, come on! I’m so excited!” Nejire exclaimed, patting his back repeatedly to urge him to start walking down the staircase.

Tamaki let out a shaky breath, following Nejire’s lead. The two of them had hung out many times before and had been alone together often, but they had never gone out somewhere explicitly as a date. A hint of pink dusted his cheeks at the prospect alone, the reality that he was going to be on a date for the first time—and with Nejire, at that—slowly sinking in.

Once they reached the school grounds, Nejire began to stroll from stall to stall excitedly, curious about the goods each of them was selling or which activity they were holding. Tamaki lagged behind, and Nejire would turn her head to check on him from time to time, asking him a question only to find him farther away each time. She sighed and pouted, shooting him a playful glare.

“You’re walking at a turtle’s pace, Amajiki! We’ll lose each other in the crowd at this rate.” Nejire reached out a hand to him, and swiftly—before he could figure out her intentions—her slim fingers intertwined with his. “There! Oh, by the way, have you heard? Apparently, some kids are selling beverages with Cementoss as the juice box! I wonder which stall is selling them…”

As Nejire rambled on, Tamaki’s eyes went wide, and his whole body grew stiff. His companion failed to notice—or perhaps, she was too used to the attention that she failed to notice—but everyone was looking their way. One by one, their whispers reached Tamaki’s ears, making his whole body tremble.

“Isn’t that Hado Nejire? The girl in The Big Three?”

“Yeah, that’s her. She won the beauty contest a while ago.”

“Look! She’s holding that guy’s hand.”

“That’s not just any other guy—that’s Amajiki Tamaki!”

“The guy who’s also in The Big Three? The one who can make tentacles?”

“Oh my gosh, you’re right! Do you think they’re dating?”

“Hey, hey! Are you okay? Are you feeling sick?” Nejire waved her free hand over his pained facial expression, worried.

“I’m… fine…”

“You don’t look fine to me, though,” she mused, peering closer to have a better look at him. “Ah, I know what this is!”

Without warning, Nejire dragged him away from the festival to the school garden. She chose the most secluded bench and pushed him on the shoulders, urging him to sit. “Wait here.”

Before Tamaki could protest, she had already turned and ran back to the direction of the festival. Although he was certain she wouldn’t ditch him, the fact that he was being a terrible date made him think twice. When a quarter of an hour passed, his shoulders threatened to slump in disappointment, and he asked himself repeatedly why she could be taking her time, assuring himself she got distracted or lost. It wouldn’t be the first time it happened.

Soon, he spotted Nejire sprinting back to him. Her lustrous hair bounced, and her face was coated by a thin sheen of sweat from the heat and physical exertion as she waved at him with a smile. “Amajiki! I’m here!”

Tamaki breathed a sigh and waved back.

Once she reached him, her breaths came out in light pants, and she handed him a paper bag. “I’m sorry I took so long. I passed by Uraraka and Tsu and chatted with them for a bit. Here you go!” 

“It’s alright. What’s this for?” Tamaki asked, checking its contents: two packages of crepe and a pair of milkshakes.

“You’re stiff when you’re nervous, and you’re grumpy when you’re hungry. As of now, you are both of those things,” she stated and sat beside him, taking her share from the paper bag. “I was looking for a takoyaki stall, but I couldn’t find one. I saw this, and it's one of my favorite comfort foods, you know? So, I thought it would be nice if we could eat this together.”

“Hado… Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Now, eat, Amajiki!”

As Tamaki unwrapped his food, the warmth he felt from Nejire’s actions slowed his movements. It didn’t surprise him how she knew him so well; they had been friends for a couple of years, after all, and yet the way she showed how she cared caught him off-guard. A pleasant feeling welled up in his chest as he listened to Nejire ramble about the stalls she passed by when she purchased their food. Tamaki used to be more comfortable eating in silence, but being surrounded by outgoing people, this had become the norm for him.

Once they were both finished eating, Nejire turned to him and asked, her voice soft and concerned, “Are you feeling better?”

Tamaki nodded. “Yeah.”

“Are you ready to go back?”

“Okay.”

“You’re sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“You’re really sure?”

“I’m really sure, Hado.” Tamaki stood, certain that their time together had helped him loosen up, ready as he’ll ever be for the crowd once more. “Let’s go.”

Nejire blinked at him, wondering what spurred this on and judging if he was well enough to go. Tamaki met her gaze and smiled. The sight of her reminded him of the performance she mesmerized everyone with earlier. At that moment, she wore no crown nor sash. She was the girl who had her curiosity piqued by anything and everything. She was the classmate who told him he reminded her of an elf when they first met and, until now, asked him endless questions. She was a great friend who showed him nothing but kindness.

She was Nejire, the girl he harbored feelings for.

Casually, Tamaki offered Nejire a hand and waited. A faint smile curved upon her lips, and she accepted and stood, both of them deliberately intertwining their fingers together.

As they returned to the festival and walked at a leisurely pace, the rest of the world was drowned out by the drumming of his heartbeat and the sound of Nejire’s voice as they talked. He pointed to a large booth a distance away. “Let’s check out that stall.”

“Oh, it’s one of those where you have to shoot a prize in order to win it,” Nejire replied, leading the way. “I didn’t think you’d be into those, Amajiki!”

“Yeah, I didn’t think so, too.”

They took their place at the back of the queue and waited for their turn. Tamaki browsed the prizes available for the taking, deciding on which one to aim to be more focused when his turn came. Nejire liked cute things, and plush toys, in general, were cute. A cat would be a safe choice, he concluded. Once they reached the front of the line, Tamaki paid the storekeeper and aimed the toy gun at the kitty plush toy wearing a purple ribbon on its head.

To his surprise, Nejire patted his back a few times and pointed to the other side of the shelf. “But, but! Why don’t you try aiming for the cute octopus one? It’s a lot like you, don’t you think so?”

“I’m not sure if that’s a compliment…”

“Duh! Of course, it is!”

“Whatever you say…” he played it off, secretly relieved that, in a way, she revealed which one had caught her attention the most out of all the prizes.

Tamaki shifted his aim and managed to hit the octopus plush toy with its rounded mouth. Nejire cheered as the storekeeper handed him his prize, and the two of them walked away from the booth to make way for the next customers. 

The moment they were a distance away from the booth, Tamaki tugged on Nejire’s sleeve and moved to hand her the octopus plush toy. “Here.”

“Huh?” She cocked her head to the side, a confused expression on her face. “I thought you wanted a cute plushie for yourself, Amajiki.”

“It’s for you.” He took her other hand to secure the octopus plush toy in her grasp and let go. “As thanks for the food and for taking me out of the crowd a while ago.”

“I see… Well, sure thing,” she replied with a smile, hugging the octopus plush toy to her cheek. “Thank you. I’ll name him ‘Tamaki-chan’.”

“What?”

“I said, ‘I’ll name him ‘Tamaki-chan’.’”

“Like your hero name? Nejire-chan?”

“That’s right!”

Before Tamaki knew it, the rest of the afternoon had gone by so quickly.

Together, the two of them explored the festival. One of Nejire’s hands had been occupied with the octopus plush toy while the other would intertwine with his and let go only when needed. Much to Nejire’s delight, they managed to locate which stall was selling beverages in Cementoss juice boxes and bought some of them. Later on, they managed to get out of the horror house unscathed. They even took photos with the ‘Principal Nezu and the U.A.’ themed photo booth, which was Nejire’s idea, but Tamaki was also on board with it, though he didn’t say it.

“I had a blast! Thanks for coming with me!” Nejire said once they reached the sidelines of the designated area for the school festival and entered the garden where they had rested earlier because of Tamaki’s nervous jitters. “Hm, I guess it’s time to go back to the dorm. Do you mind if we drop by the lockers first? I need to take the stuff I left there back with me.”

“Sure.”

With a skip in her steps, she led the way while humming the tune of her favorite song, unknowing that her happiness was making Tamaki’s nervous heart sing. It felt right. No one, save for the trees, flowers, and butterflies, was around the two of them. He didn’t know if he would get another chance, but he wanted her to know of the way he was feeling. At the same time, the depressing thought of her rejection crept inside his mind, but Tamaki cast those thoughts away as best as he could. If that were the case, he would be lonely, but it wasn’t as if they couldn’t be friends any longer. Even if she didn’t share the same romantic sentiments as him, Nejire would still be his friend, and he would remain hers. He knew her well enough, she was that kind of person.

Tamaki took a deep breath and exhaled. He took all the courage he could muster, tugged on her hand, and gave it a firm squeeze, urging her to stop. “Wait a moment, Hado.”

“What is it?” she asked, turning to him with those curious eyes that endeared him so much.

“I love you.”

Nejire was rendered speechless, a rare moment for her bright personality. Her wide-eyed gaze coupled with her reddened cheeks turned the speech Tamaki had been practicing in his mind into a jumbled mess, and his face grew warm. At that point, he must have looked like the exact shade of a tomato, but he couldn’t help it. 

She was cute. She always was, even without meaning to.

Clumsily, he gathered whatever was left of his thoughts and hoped that what would come out of his lips would be enough to convey the extent of his feelings. “I… I want to be with you, Nejire.”

She averted her gaze to her shoes and fidgeted under his stare. Letting go of his hand, her fingers fiddled with the octopus plush toy’s limbs. Her lips curved into a shy smile, and with a soft voice, she asked, “So, you finally see me as a girl now, huh? Since when?”

“For quite a while now,” he admitted. “But I don’t really remember not liking you, to be honest… H-Hey, why are you crying?”

“Sorry, I just…” She wiped her tears with her sleeve, but as she did, more streamed down her cheeks. “I thought you’d always only see me as your classmate, friend, or teammate… I never thought this day would come.”

“I’m sorry it took me so long. I was… nervous.”

She chuckled and met his gaze, beaming. “That sounds a lot like you.”

Tamaki clenched his fists nervously. “Can I… Can I get an answer?”

Nejire threw her arms around him, and he held her by the waist to catch her on reflex. “I’ve fallen for you long ago, Tamaki. I love you—of course, I want to be with you, too!”

“Really?”

“Really, really. So, you’re my boyfriend now, right? Right?”

Tamaki was unused to the term ‘boyfriend’, but when it meant that his ‘girlfriend’ was the one who was holding on to him tightly, then the warmth from her embrace was all he needed to get used to it. “Yeah.”

“Tamaki…” she called as she leaned back to look at his face. “Kiss me.”

“H-H-Here? Now?”

“You don’t want to?”

“It’s not that…”

“Then, what is it?” Nejire gazed at him expectantly. 

Tamaki asked himself the same question and found no valid answer. Throwing caution to the wind, he bent his head down and shut his eyes.

As their lips touched, the rustling of leaves made their eyes snap open and their heads turn to the direction of the sound. They released each other from their embrace and using her free hand, Nejire activated her Quirk to reveal who was behind the bushes.

Mirio and Izuku paused mid-step and turned around slowly, their eyes wide, every detail in their demeanor screaming that they were caught doing something they shouldn’t have been doing.

Izuku was the first to snap out of it. “We, uh, w-we were just—we happened to be passing by! We walked Eri to the gates, and I—um, we couldn’t help but overhear, but we sure didn’t see a-a-anything…”

“Midoriya’s right, we heard!” Mirio sauntered over to his fellow Big Three members and shook their hands. “Finally! Congratulations to you both! I guess I’m the ‘third-wheel’ now, huh.”

Tamaki began, “Mirio, were you spying—”

“Anyway, carry on!” Mirio ran back to Izuku and dragged him by the arm, escaping as quickly as they could to the direction of the dormitories.

Tamaki and Nejire exchanged glances and ended up laughing.

Special thanks to @photoproses for looking over the draft of this story for me! ♡

Thank *you* for reading my first work in this fandom! I hope the fluffy times made you smile. (◍•ᴗ•◍)

BNHA Masterlist | Main Masterlist

[suffering-and-happy-about-it]

I want to tell you... (Nathan Drake x reader, part 3.)

Description: Nathan Drake is not the exact definition of an unhappy man. His job is steady, his friends still see him from time to time, he plays football, but his marriage is his main problem. Many things will change when a special person comes to his life.

Word count: 2 600 (+/-)

Warnings: The reader will appear! Let’s get the game on!

Mood: I am really on the indie vibe lately, so I feel like Crush by Tessa Violet.

 @the-obsessive-fangirl, have a lovely summer day! And @missdictatorme knows what is about to happen. Prepare for insanely cute Nate.

“Alright, cutie,” - Nathan spoke with himself, quickly moving his eyes on the page of the cooking book where the page with Creme Brulee was opened. Nathan often spoke to himself when he was cooking and other co-workers found it cute. But when he spoke his food, screaming Don’t you catch on fire with me for example, was a whole another thing which made them sincerely laugh.

Nathan really enjoyed cooking since he was growing up, that was a thing that not much people knew about him. His passion and love for it made him an excellent cook - he was never afraid to do some experiments with food, he learned a lot of new things and eating food prepared by Nathan was like trying food from heaven, at least Chloe was telling it. 

“Let’s look at how you’re made, right?” He looked into the recipe once more, checking if he has all of the things he needed to have for having the best and balanced Brulee of them all. 

It was truly raining heavily outside, there was a big storm outside, to be honest. It could be considered a hurricane already because it was something crazy out there. Nate was glad that he was in the restaurant, safe and warm and that he could do what he loved the most.

At least Elena called that morning from Thailand, where she was currently staying, telling him that the storm was there as well but she wanted to assure him, that she's fine and well. He was glad that she called him.

"I love you." - He whispered with a shy smile, looking into one of the hanging pans. Before, Elena would answer immediately. But this time, it was completely silent for a few seconds on the other side.

"I need to go, Nate. Stay safe and don't do any dumb stuff. Promise?" - She joked, but it hurt Nathan directly next to his heart. He still cares about her, about her safety and about her feelings, but she was on lockdown for four months or so.

Nathan shook these thoughts out of his head and he stuck his tongue out as he concentrated on the Creme Brulee. It wasn't much time from that when he heard knocking on the restaurant's door.

He thought that he only overheard himself - it was raining outside and the restaurant was closed. Nathan furrowed his brows and stood up straight up when he heard the knocking again. He checked that everything was on its place so the kitchen won't catch on fire and he made his way to the actual part with tables, chair, and a bar. They were closed, who would try to knock their way into the restaurant while there was a hurricane outside? 

Nathan tried to stay as hidden as the door let him, he would not open some random hobo person. He would give them something warm, food and water - but it would be a big risk to let them inside. But instead of a hobo, there was a woman figure standing outside in the rain with her palms covering her eyes as she looked inside. 

The woman saw Nate instantly, waving at him and smiling in a dorky way. Nathans first instinct was to go and help that woman inside. It was a cold, rainy mess when he opened the door, the wind almost blew him away from the door as the woman practically run inside and helped him to close the door with every of the lock they had.

Only after that, Nathan turned at her, and he must have looked like a fool at that moment. She truly was gorgeous. Wet hair fell around her face in a messy way and her skin was slippery and wet from the rain; which made her cheeks completely rosy. She was trying to catch her breath with her lips opened a little and her eyes closed. That woman only wore a trench coat, which made no sense in this type of weather, jeans and some classy shoes. She probably didn't see the weather coming or she thought that she'll be alright.

Nathan had an unreadable expression on his face, still looking at her as she was leaning into the glass. She started laughing, which made Nathans face even softer and his eyes started to shine. 

He felt like if he knew her since forever, he had a feeling that he knew her eyes and the tone of her laugh was so light-hearted and cute that it made his stomach shrunk in a tickling way. She made his heart beat faster without him noticing and his fingers tremble a bit. He didn't even remember when he felt so instantly happy and... Nervous. That girl made him nervous.

“Man, you saved my life. I thought that nobody’s going to answer.” - She spoke all of a sudden, made him even more struck on the spot. Nathan wide his eyes, watching her face. She had nice contours even tho her make-up was on a run. 

“How-how.” - He tried to spoke but coughed into his hand when he felt that his own voice is falling apart from her. - “How did you even know that there is somebody out here? I mean, what if you knocked on an empty restaurant?” - Nathan gave her one of his cheesy smiles, standing on his feet and looking her into eyes because he found them so gorgeous he wasn't even able to breathe. 

“Your car is parking in the aisle next to the restaurant.” - She waved in car’s direction and Nathan assumed that it is a pretty logical consideration. - “Or so I was hoping for that to be the truth. And the bars on the doors were lifted and so I tried my luck. You aren't the brightest, right?” - She said in a playful voice as she started laughing again. Nathan leaned his head to his shoulder and he felt ashamed a bit. It was practically obvious that there's someone inside. 

“I will pretend that I didn't hear that. I mean that thing you practically said that I am dumb.” - Nathan tried to show her his most charming smile, offering her his palm. He was sweaty because of the nervousness and she was as cold as an iceberg and wet from the rain, so he was praying that she wouldn't notice. 

“I haven't said that you are dumb! You make me look rude now, Jesus. My names Y/N and I think that we should start from the begging again, no mean comments now, I swear.” - She put a hand on her heart with a sweet smile like she if swore to Nathan. 

“Name’s Nate and you're freezing, aren't you?” - Nate slowly let go of her hand, turning to walk back to his kingdom. Y/N slowly followed him-

“I am, in fact, freezing. You are very bright in fact.” - She winked with a smile. She was trying to make him forget about that little escapade which happened minutes ago and Nate just shook his head at that. He opened the door to the kitchen and she just stood there with an unsure look. 

“Can I even go there?” - Y/N asked with a frown on her face, which made Nathan twitch inside again. What the hell was he doing? Or, most importantly, why did his body react to that girl the way it did? - “I mean, isn't it a food hygiene risk? To have a dirty, wet human in your kitchen? Wouldnt some hygiene guy be seriously mad about that?” 

Nathan had to laugh a little when he saw her unsure expression. Her eyes were twitching between him and his hand on the door as he was patiently waiting for her. 

“As long as you don't pee or spit your saliva anywhere, I think we're cool. Come in.” - Nathan smiled at her, letting her pass directly next to him. When he smelled her perfume, he almost fell to the ground. It was a sweet scent and the rain only made it stand out. He almost fainted. 

“I will give you my towel, I'll just go for it to the dressing room, alright? Just don't steal anything, I beg you.” - Nathan ran off to that room with a childish smile as he could hear that he made her laugh again. She had such a sweet laugh! She definitely caught his eyes with some magic, or he couldn't rationalize his excited behavior.

When he got back, he almost fainted. She took the coat off and she had only a green shirt on, and it was completely dumped from water as well, so his eyes didn't have to imagine any of her curves - they saw it right away. Nathan felt like he shouldn't stare, so he turned away from her, only giving her his towel.Y/N accepted it with a small smile, leaning her ass into one of the counters, watching the surrounding and firstly trying to make her hair somehow dry before she wrapped the towel around her body.

“So what some hot drink and food sound like?” - Nathan looked at her as he cleaned up his place from his experimental baking. 

“I don't know mate. I don't have much money with me.” - Y/N shrugged her shoulders, but Nate smiled at her. 

“Let me ask again. Would you like me to cook something and make you a cup of something?” - Nathan opened up the fridge as he picked some of the freshest tomatoes they had. He had a perfect food in his mind - tomato sauce and pasta. Easy, quick and delicious. 

“I guess so. You’re so persistent. I have like... Fifteen bucks? Would that be enough?” - Y/N grabbed her purse, frantically searching for money. 

“Don't bother and be my guest. I'll pay for you afterward.” - Nate chuckled and started to chop the tomatoes. He also started the kettle, deciding that English black tea with some honey would suit her the best at her current state.

“What were you doing at that storm outside, huh? It makes me look a lot brighter than you.” - He said as he concentrated on making the onion and garlic just perfect while they were frying in the pan. 

“We moved here like two days ago. I heard in the news that there will be some stormy weather, but I never thought it could be that bad.” - She hummed as she sipped the tea, sitting on the counter next to his wooden cutting board, moving her legs from side to side. - “And I got lost in the city. Which made me come here.”

“We moved in?” - Nathan asked in a concerned voice as he watched the curve of her nose. She had a beautiful nose. He was chopping some basal as well, feeling her body being ridiculously close to his hand. What was wrong with him? 

He assumed that she is talking about some roommate or a friend, sharing their flat during their studies. She seemed to be an intelligent and bright lady, surely at least five years younger than him. If she wasn't even younger. She could be a college student. 

“Yeah, I started to study my bachelor degree here since my junior college ended. It felt like the best choice.” - Y/N answered, not revealing with whom she moved in here. Nathan was curious about that information a lot, but he didn't want to look like some weird psycho, so he didn't ask further questions. 

They ate together in the kitchen, telling some really interesting stories to each other - Y/N talked about her hometown a lot and Nathan tried to charm her with some of the thrilling stories from his adventure. Their sense of humor got along really well. Nathan truly liked that feeling of getting to know her better, he liked how he could make her eyes shine when she laughed. His heart beat faster and faster just because she was looking at him and his cheeks got rosy when she said that his cooking skills were over the top.

They were about to open a bottle of a really sweet wine which got along with a bit of bitterness that the tomatoes had when her phone started to ring. 

And his heart almost coldly sank into his stomach when he was that sweet nickname and a photo of some handsome lad. Nathan couldn't understand his feelings, he felt betrayed and sad. Y/N smiled at him and picked up the call. 

“Hey, babe.” - She whispered to the phone as she leaned further away from him. Nathans heart jumped at the tone of it but sank immediately when he realized that she didn't call him that nickname. He moved away and started to clean up that place, letting only the wine glasses between them. - “Yeah, don't worry. I am safe and I made a friend here. Yeah. A first friend in this city. Crazy, I know.” 

Nathan looked on how water was brushing his hands and frowned. Why was he sad? He was married. And he got his ring on his left hand the whole time. Y/N could spot it easily. But even tho she could see it, he didn't like being friend-zoned. It wasn't a nice thing at all. 

“I am in that Italian restaurant which is like... Ten minutes from our flat? I think. You know that my orientation sucks.” - She laughed when her boyfriend asked her something. - “Alright. Alright. Be safe. I love you. Bye.” She hung up and started to take the towel from her body. 

“I loved being around you, I truly did. My boyfriend just got home and he’ll pick me up in our car here, so no need to open up that wine. It would be too expansive then anyway.” - Y/N took a pen and one napkin as she wrote her name on it and her name under that number. - “Here. Call me, text me, whatever you want. I am up for having some good time at the beach with you, you said you know it the best of all people out here and it just sounds fun.” She said when Nathan walked her out of the restaurant. He was smiling with a sad undertone.

Nate didn't want her to go. He was enjoying him a bit too much that morning. But it would be too weird to ask if she stays. And he didn't want her to think that he is a psycho.  Her boyfriend was already under the roof covering the entrance. 

It was a handsome lad indeed. Perfect for her, yet Nate’s brain didn't think so. But he smiled at her boyfriend anyway. 

“This is Nate. This is Mike.” - She introduced them, leaning into Mike’s side because he was warm. Mike smiled widely at Nate, offering him his hand as Nate hesitantly accepted. - “Nate would like to show us around, maybe he would come with his wife?” Y/N rose her eyebrows and Nate smiled shyly. 

She gave him a tight, heartwarming hug and Nathan felt how every inch of her body is just burning. She was warm and soft and she smelled so good. He smiled at the couple when they were getting into their car as he realized one thing.

Something called crush just happened to him and it was instant, insanely intense and felt like heaven and the hell at the same time. 

[thosestarsthatshine]

Loved and Lost

Ch. 4: Things We Shared in the Dark

Five Years Ago

Y/N paced back and forth in the living room of her apartment. A cool summer breeze came in through the open window, a departure from the sweltering heat that had been present earlier in the day. An unnerving silence filled the room, breathlessly waiting for the phone to ring with the answer she so desperately wanted to hear. An opportunity had come across her path, one that could help launch her career into heights unknown, but as to be expected of life changing opportunities - there was a catch. An agency in America had taken an interest in her hero work, they had expressed interest in her being a part of their agency. The job required her to move from Japan to America and she didn’t know when or if she would see her family and friends again or anytime soon for that matter. After several rounds of interviews and performance tests, she was waiting to see if she had been selected.

Exasperating - the only word Y/N could think of to describe the seemingly endless wait for the phone to ring. Pondering over the opportunity and all of its benefits, her mind soon began to fill with fears and anxieties. It was a big decision for someone to make so young, she was only nineteen still fresh out of high school and wasn’t sure if taking this opportunity was really the best thing for her at such a young age.

What if I’m not good enough? Can I really just pick up my life and move to a different country, I’m only nineteen? What if I don’t take this opportunity and regret it for the rest of my life? Would my father be proud?

Trying desperately to wrangle back control of her mind from the uneasiness taking over, she started to take deep breaths. In and out. In and out. Until finally her mind was at peace once more. There was no sense in fretting about those things now, she wasn’t even sure she officially received the offer. Taking some time to put her mind at ease, she placed her phone on the coffee table and decided to just watch the television. However, life has a funny way of presenting itself and the moment that she finally started to relax, the phone began to ring.

On waited breath, she took a few moments before answering the call, to not seem as desperate. Taking a few breaths to calm the soon rising nervous, she anxiously picked up the phone.

“Hello?”

A bubbly voice picked up on the other side, “Hi this is Karen, calling from United Heroes, I would just like to call and tell you that after much careful review and consideration. Out of all the candidates that we saw, you were the one we thought was exceptionally qualified and we would love to have you join our team.”

A smile had soon crept onto Y/N’s lips, she had done what seemed like the impossible and now right here before her the opportunity of a lifetime was presenting itself. It took her a bit to respond back to Karen and after much back and forth, she was given by the end of the week to give an official answer.

“We just want to make sure that you are completely prepared, it is a big opportunity, especially for one so fresh out of school, but we would love to have you with us. Go ahead and take a couple of days, and let me know by Friday what you’re official answer will be. That way we can proceed with the paperwork. If everything goes smoothly we’ll have you come out here by next week.”

After exchanging pleasantries, the phone soon disconnected. An ecstatic scream escaped her lips.

A couple of days had past and Y/N had called to officially accept the position. Karen had told her that Y/N needed to have everything ready to be shipped to America, including herself, by Saturday. Hero work often moved at a fast past - it’s just the way the job went. Y/N had expected to move out there quickly, but not that quickly. She was suddenly filled with doubt - did she really make the right decision?

After internally going back and forth with herself, she knew she wasn’t going to get anywhere - she needed someone to give her a second opinion. So, she sought out the one person who’s opinions always had mattered the most to her, Hitoshi. He was her best friend after all, he would be the one to give her the best advice about everything.

So it was here, on this unusually calm and cool summer Friday night that Y/N sought out Hitoshi. They had planned to meet up at one of their favorite hangouts, a cafe they had discovered early on in their friendship. It had become their place all throughout their days at U.A. and beyond.

Opening the old doors to the cafe, Y/N had spotted Hitoshi sitting at their favorite table, a small corner booth in the very depths of the cafe, away from prying eyes. His amethyst eyes shining brighter as he saw her enter from across the room. As she got closer, she noticed that he had ordered her favorite drink, and it filled her with so much glee. Yet, at the same time, so much dread - why?

Maybe it was because she knew that it could possibly be one of the last times she would see him? Maybe it was due to the fact that inside she was still torn about her decision to go? Who knew? She pushed it aside for the moment as she sat down across from him.

Hitoshi could sense the trouble brewing in her head. He could see the puzzled look on her face as she sat down. He desperately wanted to know what she was thinking about.

“Is everything alright?”

Y/N could only give him a faint smile, “Yeah, I just spaced out for a second.” She hesitated, not knowing how to tell him that she was leaving. Part of her was afraid to tell him. She wanted to keep it a secret for just a little while longer, but defeatedly knew she couldn’t. She had to tell him. “Toshi, there’s something I need to tell you. I got a job offer with United Heroes and America. They want me to leave tomorrow. I don’t know when I’ll see you again.”

It pained her to tell him, and she could tell that it pained him to hear. Hitoshi didn’t know what to say, he was left speechless at the news that he had just received. She was leaving for America in the morning. He was heartbroken. Devastatingly heartbroken. He would never tell her that though. How could he?

“So I guess this is goodbye then huh?” His words coming out harsher than he intended.

“Yeah, I guess.” Y/N sounding so unsure of her words.

Hitoshi could sense the sadness in her. He wasn’t sure if it was because they were going to be parted for the first time since they had become friends, or if it was because of something more. He felt the need to reassure her everything was going to be alright.

“Well, if you’re leaving tomorrow, then we might as well enjoy what little time we have left!”

His words brought a smile to Y/N’s face. For a moment it felt like a facade, a mask she was putting on just to feign happiness for him. She shook her head at the thought. She knew it was just Hitoshi trying to reassure her that things would work out in the end. She was grateful for it and yet, she still couldn’t shake the feeling of dread.

In an attempt to soak up as much time as they had together, they began to reminisce. They stayed in that booth for what seemed like hours - talking and laughing and remembering all the moments that they had shared together since their first year at U.A., and even when the owner finally kicked them out, they continued. Deciding to continue back at her place.

On the walk to her apartment, they couldn’t help but notice that the night sky looming over them seemed darker than normal - it was as if the sky itself was moonless. It didn’t help the lingering feelings in Y/N’s heart as they continued their walk.

As they entered Y/N’s apartment they continued to share memories of their past, but now with photo albums to help them reminisce. They remembered the time that Y/N bought herself, Aizawa, and Hitoshi matching cat onesies, or the time that Hitoshi had found the litter of abandoned kittens outside of their dorms and had convinced Y/N to sneak them in without telling her father. They even reminisced about the time that Hitoshi had received his capture weapon - a scarf similar to the one that Aizawa wore, and how he was so excited he cried.

Going over memory after memory, the two found a looming dread hanging over them. Tomorrow they would be parted, for who knew how long. They wouldn’t be able to make any knew memories together, or at least that’s what they thought.

Y/N was glancing at pictures in a new photo album, she looked so beautiful, it broke his heart to know that she wouldn’t be around anymore. Hesitantly, Hitoshi gently cupped her face and kissed her. Emotions taking over as he felt the need to somehow tell her how he felt. She seemed to be confused with his kiss at first, but then soon melted into it, as if to tell him she felt the same. Their kiss wasn’t rough or filled with need. It was sweet and soft and somehow perfect. As Hitoshi pulled away and stared into her eyes, he felt the need to apologize, pulling his arms away from her face and quietly whispering, “I’m sorry”, followed by a faint “I love you”.

Y/N filled with emotions of her own couldn’t find the words to respond, so she just kissed him. Again and again and again. Telling him with her actions what she couldn’t with her words. Feelings now bared to the world as they quietly confessed to one another what they were too afraid to speak.

They soon found the world fall away as they shared what they both had hidden for so long. Longing for each other in a way they had never expressed before, touches burning as they caressed each other. Their souls intertwining as they made love into the night. Soon letting the darkness envelop them both.

The soft glow of the moonlight finally streaming through the curtains gently woke Hitoshi up. It illuminated the room in a light grey mist that gave off a sense of calmness and peace. Still in a foggy haze, he lazily rubbed the sleep from his eyes and shifted to his left to look at the alarm clock on the nightstand. It was only three in the morning, plenty of time to once again succumb to sleep before the sun rose and the day officially began. Turning to the right, he saw what he could only describe as the most beautiful thing that he had ever laid his eyes upon. The love of his life soundly sleeping next to him. Y/N, the person he had loved and cherished for so many years, was there as close as she could be, naked as the day she was born - only the thin sheet from the bed covering her.

As he looked upon her face, noticing alluring features accentuated by the moonlight surrounding her and the soft halo of her hair framing her face. It made her look as if she was an angel from the heavens who had bestowed upon him the pleasure of her presence. He was reminded of the Grecian Goddess, Persephone.

As he breathed in her captivating beauty, he felt an aching in his heart, a sense of fear and self-loathing rising to the surface. Terrified of what might happen when the sun rose on them, on what she might say when she awoke to see him laying there beside her.

Would she be ashamed or would she be elated?

He was scared of what might come of their relationship afterward.

Would there even be a relationship or would it all come crashing down around him?

He was frustrated and feeling so small.

He hated that feeling. He had become so determined to prove to everyone how great he could be, and in some regards he had done just that, but he knew he wasn’t quite done. He wanted to be someone that people looked up to and knew that even if they were different, they too could achieve great success. He had come so far, pushing himself to become the person that he knew he was meant to be, and doing so all with her encouragement and support. She was one of the brightest lights in his very dark life and he loved her intensely. She was his rock and his best friend. Yet, there was still a throbbing in his heart.

Despite all that he had achieved and all the success that he had garnered, he still knew he had a long way to go before he could ever be the hero that he wanted to be, not just for himself but for her as well. The fears from his youth crept back into his mind consuming his very soul. He soon grew outraged for feeling this way, but deep down in the depths of his heart he knew what he needed to do.

Gently he rose from the bed, frightened of waking her as he planned his escape in the wee hours of the morning. He quickly found his clothes scattered amongst hers on the cold hardwood floor, the only evidence of their shared time together and the passion that had ensued - quietly putting them on so as not to disturb her slumber. He saw Y/N’s form shift on the bed and he froze. Silence fell upon them and when he felt assured that she was not going to wake he continued on. Before he could leave, he stood watching her peacefully sleeping form in the now empty bed. It pained him deeply, a great sorrow washed over him as he contemplated his decision.

Was he really making the right choice?

He felt cowardice for not facing her, for making this decision on his own, but despite it all he believed it was the right one. She too had dreams that had yet to be fulfilled and was working so hard to achieve. It was only hours ago that she had told him about her life changing opportunity. There were always ways that enabled things to work, but it would only put unnecessary strain on both of their hearts. He knew she was the one for him and that if they started something now it could hurt them both. They needed to like to grow as individuals before anything could happen between them. He felt that if there was ever going to be a time for the two of them that this just wasn’t the right one.

Would there ever be though?

He maintained that there would and that this was the best decision. Yet in the back of his mind he knew it wasn’t. He was letting his own fears and insecurities take over. He felt himself be reduced to the boy he was growing up - the same boy who was told he could never be a hero with a quirk like his. He was scared of loving her and not having her love him back.

Without further hesitation, as the tears soon welled in his eyes threatening to spill over his lashes as he softly planted a kiss on her forehead. He tried his best to choke back the tears that were on the verge of spilling but in the moment his control was lost and his emotions took over. Walking away from the bed in that moment was the hardest thing he had to do. It felt like an invisible force was pulling him back to her but he knew he needed to break free. Silently sobbing and desperately wanting to turn back, to return to the bed, to just face whatever may come his way, he knew that he mustn’t look back.

Petrified of what was now set in motion as he stepped past the threshold of her door. He kept repeating to himself that this was indeed the best decision and that she would, hopefully, understand one day. He would never regret the night that had been shared between them nor could he ever forget. When in those shared and fleeting moments nothing mattered except for them, just a woman and a man, no more and no less. The memory of that night would forever be etched into his mind always there when he closed his eyes when the thought of her took control in his mind.

As he closed the door on her, on the night that they had shared, he whispered a final goodbye. Not knowing when or if he would see her again. With his back against the door, he prayed that the universe would be in his favor and one day bring her back. Silent tears spilled once more as he slipped into the dark beneath the once again moonless sky.

Flash forward to now, here she stood in front of him with a little boy gently cradled in her arms. “Hitoshi, this is my son, Hiro”. He couldn’t believe the words his ears had just heard. Her son.

“Hiro, this is Mama’s friend, Hitoshi.” Hiro at his mother’s words turned away from her and towards Hitoshi. He could only stare at him for a few moments before giving him the biggest smile, possibly giving Midoriya a run for his money.

“Hi!”

Hitoshi was now given him the opportunity to take in the sight of the boy. He had a short mop of black hair that stuck out in every which way, and these big obsidian eyes. He wore a black Eraserhead shirt and light denim jeans with red high tops. He could have been mistaken for Aizawa’s mini me, if it weren’t for the fact that he had some of Y/N’s features in him as well. Yet, he couldn’t find any of Bakugou in the boy. He blamed it on genetics, that maybe Y/N’s were stronger. Hitoshi pondered the idea that maybe Bakugou and Hiro had similar quirks - if he even had a quirk. Yet in spite of this, Hitoshi couldn’t help this feeling in the pit of his stomach that something was off about Hiro. No matter how hard he tried to shake the feeling away, it gnawed at him - demanding his attention.

He gave the boy a quick hello back.

Before he could question the thoughts in his mind, he was pulled away from his thoughts by Aizawa who had called him into the kitchen needing his assistance, leaving Hiro and Y/N to be on their own.

All throughout dinner, he couldn’t help but bring his attention back to the mother and son. It was clear that they both loved each other, and that Hiro was the center of her world. Every so often though, the boy would do something or say something that would bring Hitoshi back to the feeling that gnawed at the pit of his stomach. As he watched the boy interact with everyone at the table, he could tell that Hiro was so full of life and Hitoshi was reminded of Y/N. He was fascinated by Hiro, and Hiro with Hitoshi. Hiro told him how he loved heroes and that he wanted to be one when he grew up. All night he had been bugging his grandfather to see if he could help him use his quirk. Much to the chagrin of Y/N.

Finally, Aizawa gave in, seeing this as an opportunity to not only bond with his grandson. This caused Hiro to bounce up and down with excitement. However, Y/N was hesitant, but her father assured her that everything would be just fine. It would allow her to get settled a bit more and would give her some free time to herself. Something that she rarely had these days. She could finally start wedding planning and was thinking about asking Uraraka and Ashido if they wanted to hang out. Plus, depending on when Bakugou got home they could also spend some alone time together as well. So albeit reluctantly, Y/N agreed and the plan was set for tomorrow.

As the night winded down, Hiro soon began to grow tired and a bit fussy. His mother quickly scooped him up, and was about to take him to bed when the little boy lifted his tired head up so he could wave goodbye to Hitoshi.

Soon after, Hitoshi headed home with the night’s events still swirling around in his mind. He kept going back to Hiro and the feeling he had in the depths of his stomach. He still couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something about the boy that seemed off, even seemed familiar. He was once again shaken from his thoughts by an incoming text from Aizawa.

AIZAWA: Come to the U.A. training grounds to train with Hiro and I tomorrow. 9 AM.

Without hesitation, Hitoshi immediately responded.

HITOSHI: I’ll be there.

As he tried to drift off to sleep, Hitoshi knew that it would be impossible with the nagging feeling inside that wouldn’t go away. He resolved that tomorrow, he would get the answers to the questions that began to haunt his mind. Even if he had to put up a fight to get the information.

One way or another he was going to get to the bottom of things.

[bucky-is-a-hero-fightme]

Daybreak

IN YOUR HEARTBEAT MASTERLIST

Pairing: Bucky/Reader, Natasha/Sister!Reader

Word Count: 2600 approx. May come back for a few fixes, but I wanna put it out today.

Warnings: … :) A shit ton of feels. The bad kind. The kind that made me cry while writing. And while editing. And reading. So yea.

For the proper trigger warning part, nothing that hasn’t been common to the story. Mentions and descriptions of emotional, mental, and physical torture; mentions of violence; mentions and descriptions of grief; my lackluster writing of catatonia as a response to trauma in PTSD victims; mentions of death, vague mentions of invasive medical procedures.

Also, this may not be everyone’s cup of tea. Just an FYI.

A/N: Saying sorry doesn’t work if I just continue to make characters suffer, does it? Jesus, okay. I kinda liked writing this chapter, even though it hurt like a bitch. But, like I said, I like testing the characters, and yeah, idk.

I had fun writing Bucky, even if it was to torture him. It let me explore (aside from his character, that I hope I did justice) the other side of soulmates in this universe. I feel like shit about making him suffer though, really.

Also, there’s like a tiny mention of the reader not being able to speak Romanian. If you are one of the 19million natives, I am so sorry, but also hi! I love your country, I am visiting soon and I’m HYPED! (Also, the mountain mentioned is Tampa, because I love it’s history and also it’s so fucking pretty I wanna cry)

Thank you so much for reading, please let me know what you think! Come talk to me on my dm’s or ask, I would love to hear from you guys! Thank you!

Taglist: @learisa @lixbean @quiessilva-meriff @miss-i-ship-it @221bbands @darkblueeyedperson @beansparker @fairislesheets @aunty-peggy @me-myself-and-i-4-the-win @checkintoreality @dontwintilligetthere  @neuschwanstein

His eyes are closed, and some part of him vaguely registers that soft wind with a hint of pinewood ruffles around him, making him feel lighter than he has in years.

“Guess you were right, Brasov was worth the trouble.” You whisper suddenly, but strangely enough, your voice doesn’t startle him. Your arms wrap around his waist and he feels the soft press of your lips on the center of his back.

It is with a soft smile that he answers, eyes still closed, “And by trouble you mean…”

“That you are the only one that can speak Romanian, love.”

He hums in fake consideration of your words as he turns in your arms, Your face finding a home on the juncture of his neck and shoulder, his hands roaming over your back as you huddle close to protect yourself from the cold wind of the mountain.

“Talked to ‘Tasha already?” He murmurs, feeling you nod against his skin. After a few minutes that seem like small pockets of eternity, you pull away from his embrace a little, the ghost of your touch tracing over Bucky’s cheeks, right under his still closed eyes.

“Aren’t you gonna open those eyes for me, handsome?” You tease, but for some reason dread settles in Bucky’s stomach, like some sort of foreboding knowledge that this is somehow the beginning of the end. He thinks he shakes his head in response, but you don’t give any indication that you paid any attention to his answer, and there’s urgency in your voice when you try again, “Bucky?”

Something in him almost crumbles at the apparent pain and uncertainty in your voice, but he cannot bring himself to open his eyes.

“I-I can’t, doll, I…”

“Hey, hey,” You soothe quickly, letting him feel the warmth of your touch when you take a hold of his face between your small, gentle hands. “At ease, soldier,” You laugh, “I’m not going anywhere.”

And just like that, you press your lips to his. A simple, carefree move on your part that never fails to make his whole world brighter, if only for just an instant or two.

Since that first time he even saw you, he has marveled at the way you seem to move so sure of the fact that your next step will land on solid ground, even when you are amidst a world of crumbling fields.

You part from him, but your sweet and short breaths still graze his hungry lips, achingly close and far at the same time. He isn’t ready yet to let go, doesn’t think will ever be ready to if he is honest; but you don’t seem to want to step away just yet, so Bucky presses his forehead to yours and takes a deep breath.

He feels your skin give under his fingers, and it is as if some dormant, scared part of him finally snaps in place, reassured because you are here. With a deep breath, unsure of why he is so hesitant to do so, like some hidden, quietened part of him is screaming at him to keep this safe; he opens his eyes.

Your bright smile greets his uncertain gaze,

“There you are.”

You are here, and you are real, and God, you want him, and if he closes his eyes he can pretend you can love him too.

Bucky doesn’t even know why he feels the sudden urge to take you in, to hold you close and keep you safe from this unseen danger that lurks in the back of his mind.

His answering chuckle is watery and broken, but you don’t mention it and he is too busy embracing the relief that for some reason overwhelms him to ponder on it for too long.

Your E/C eyes meet his, as if you too refuse to let go of the faint and brief connection. Your smile turns a little sad when you press a soft kiss against his lips, and whisper against them,

“You have to wake up, soldier.”

Bucky frowns, even as dread settles in his stomach.

“What?”

“I’m not going anywhere.” You repeat, but he knows it’s a lie this time.

It dawns on him, and for some reason the unrelenting nightmare of his bullet piercing your heart on that desert comes back to haunt him.

It’s the way you hadn’t reacted at first, not feeling the pain just yet, not realizing you had been shot just then; like a numb denial settling over you. Bucky understands it better than anyone now, because in this moment there’s too something jagged and animal inside of him that holds on with all its might to peace, to life, while they both fall through his fingers like quicksand, even as a part of him longs to stop time, to stop it all: pain, reality, life, death.

He is shaking his head, but he feels himself pulling away, he feels this reality giving way to the nightmare, he feels you vanish.

“Please…” He croaks out, but his eyes are already open by that time.

The old and caving wooden ceiling of the cabin greets his tired gaze, forcing him to realize that almost seven months ago, when you two had visited the small mountain-side house in Brasov, the place had seemed pristine, with well-kept walls and light pouring in from the big windows, keeping the house warm even in the windy weather.

Now, though, he can’t seem to hide form the shadows with the voices of ghosts, he can’t shake off the cold that took over his bones so long ago.

He feels ashamed, but there’s still a part of him that would welcome the terrifying zap of his Handler’s machine, the agonizing way the memories were pried off his mind. There’s a part of him, however shameful, that bitterly and brokenly wants to ask destiny why was it that the Soldat is the one committing the sins while he lives with the guilt, but the Soldat can’t be the one with the awareness of your death without him having to live with the heartache, with the absence.

When he rolls to the side, his heart hopefully and yet wrongly hoping for the relief of you being there, of a proof that it actually was a nightmare; he feels the same crushing weight he feels every morning since you were truly gone set over his chest.

Because that’s the thing of living without what the universe deemed to be his other half, Bucky ponders, and it is something that goes beyond this squelching feeling, like someone just ripped off a part of him when he felt you go, the pain in his heart like it’s being forced to keep on beating against it’s on will, despite  the loss of this essential part; it’s beyond that pain, and it is about the absence carved into him since you are gone. It’s about the everyday without you.

After the initial pain, after Bucky woke up in a hospital bed with a haggard looking Steve at his side, after the initial numbness wore off and he had to understand it wasn’t a nightmare; the sharp pain is gone, and was more like this dawning feeling, like he didn’t know this world anymore, like he couldn’t, and still can’t, understand how the world goes on with this pulsating absence somewhere deep inside of him, like a lost connection where he is still left waiting for you to speak, because that same part of him that feels the absence, refuses to live on a world without you in it.

He vaguely remembers a conversation with Steve, or rather hearing Steve talk to him.

He knows if he reaches out, if he stays in this present too long, of he puts his feet on the ground; that he is going to be bound here, that this is going to be real, that this is going to be agony.

So he doesn’t. He lets Steve speak, eats when he asks him too, sleeps when he asks him too, and goes on with the soft orders of his best friend, trying to ignore the dull pain in his chest at seeing Stevie so torn about not being able to help him.

But he can’t let himself feel that pain, because if he does, it will all come back.

And if it all comes back, if it all feels real, then he won’t wake up. And Bucky can’t wait to wake up.

“I’m going to have you hooked to an IV if you keep this up.”

Bucky realizes he should react, that Steve wants him to. He would react, he can’t stand doctors. He will probably wake up when he feels the needle though, so he says nothing.

His best friend sighs, “Buck, I…I don’t know what to do,” Steve runs a hand over his face, and Bucky thinks he wasn’t meant to hear his next words, “Maybe because nothing can make this better.”

It took him weeks to realize he wasn’t going to wake up, to come back and be forced to put his feet on the ground.

Natalia is sitting next to him, thinner than he ever saw her, a new darkness lurking behind her eyes.

She expects something from him, he knows. So, he gives the only answer he can. His explanation, his denial, his hopelessness.

“Y/N is gone.”

In a weak moment before he left the compound, maybe in what was the last drop that made him decide to leave, he asked Steve if it ever got better.

“I still expect to see my Peggy when I go see her, I know she still…I know she sometimes sees a life we did not have when she closes her eyes. I…”

Steve takes a deep breath, the broken soldier breaking past the shields, the masks, of Captain America.

“You’ll never stop hoping, when you roll over in the morning, that she’s there, telling you it is all a nightmare. You will never stop hoping, Buck. I am sorry.”

“But we survive despite it.” Bucky states, wondering distantly if he should worry how resigned he sounds.

Steve’s answering chuckle is as hopeless as he feels, “They never gave us a choice not to.”

He left for Brasov the next morning. It was probably one of the only, and definitely the last place he remembers being…feeling like maybe it was safe being happy, for once.

Your laugh seems to taunt him and have him chasing ghosts, your scent deluding his mind into believing you are there, your absence accompanying him like the most faithful companion.

And now, with the devastating and wonderful gift of hindsight, he curses all those times he hesitated before reaching out for you, all those times your lips curved up in a smile and he held back from tasting the smile on his own lips, all those times he decided to sit back and respond with only a chuckle of his own when all he wanted to do was wrap his arms around you and feel the calming beat of your heartbeat against his own.

___

A knock on his door takes him away from his poor attempt at fixing the malfunctioning heater in the main room.

He walks carefully to the door, the back of his mind telling him he should worry about his safety, considering this was supposed to be an undisclosed location, but by the time the thought has set the door is already open and he is face to face with Natalia for the first time in what feels like not long enough.

“Natalia.” The word leaves his lips on a scratchy gasp, making him wonder when was the last time he talked. Or drank water.

“I know you do not want to see me, but I need your help.” She states. Quickly, professionally. Even as her green eyes take him in with concern, even as the softness that she found when you were at their side still guides her steps.

“Is Steve…?”

“Steve is alright.”

“What is it, then?” He tries not to make it sound as harsh as it does, but something about having her in front of him makes him skittish.

“I…found Karpov,” She clenches her eyes shut, probably at what she sees written on his expression, “I know what you are going to say. Trust me, I do, but…”

He states simply, interrupting her, “You want him dead.”

“I want him suffering,” She corrects in a hiss, seeming to tower over him when she straightens her back with all her might, looking him dead in the eye and continuing, “I want his blood. And I need your help, Bucky.

Regarding the redhead for a second, he finally gives in and moves from the door, motioning silently for her to come in. She does, pacing a few feet away from him.

Bucky waits patiently until she speaks,

“He is holed up in Siberia. Has called for some Hydra officials -the few remaining, anyway- to meet him there. I don’t know what is going on, but…this is our only chance.” Her last words are whispered, almost manic.

“It will not bring her back, Natalia.”

“Neither will letting yourself die, Barnes,” She flinches at her own words, he almost wants to tell her it didn’t hurt, but she is speaking again, the girl with big eyes and a fire in her soul that Hydra tried to extinguish so long ago in that distant facility in Belarus, looking up at him, “Sorry. I need to do this. Please.”

___

She finishes laying her plan of attack and detailing the intel gathered on the facility and the movement of men within it.

“It’s dangerous.” He states simply, but she shrugs in response. It makes him want to remember the careless way you regarded your own safety too, the way you would have shrugged the same way, smiled his way and told him he was too old to worry that much.

“I know.”

“We may not come back.”

“I know.” I don’t’ care.

Bucky takes a deep breath, and finally gives his answer, “Even if we do, you are not going to see me again, Natalia,” She tries questioning his meaning, but he explains quickly, simply, “I am leaving.”

Natalia stands up, walking to him but stopping with a light grimace when he takes a few unconscious steps back, “Where? W-Why?”

“I don’t…I don’t know. I can’t stay still, I can’t…” A deep breath, and then, “Your soulmate is dead, aren’t they?”

“You know he is.” She answers, curt, stiff.

“Then you…you have to understand. It’s as if…as if an absence was carved into me, and it feels like…”

“Like you don’t know this world anymore,” She says, voice and eyes tearful, “Like losing a lit match in the midst of the darkness, like feeling the cold creeping over again.”

Bucky swallows, “I have to leave, Natalia.”

There’s a moment of silence, a quiet understanding in the heavy shoulders of the Black Widow. He moves to the back room where he kept the weapons and tactical gear he brought in, but Natalia calls out to him,

“For what is worth, I am sorry.”

He knows she is talking about her hunt for his blood, her attempts to keep her sister away from him. Maybe she believes she stole time from the two of you when trying to keep you safe, but he is certain it is what kept you alive for so long, being away from him, being unaware of his existence.

And a part of him wants to tell her she should have ended him when she had the chance, she should have let his blood stain her hands instead of his sins reaching you.

“You shouldn’t be,” Is all he answers. And after a beat, “And I am sorry too.”

__

Perhaps it is the greatest grief, after all, to be left on earth when another is gone. M.Miller

The Last Chapter is gonna be up real soon!

Thank you so much for reading, lovelies! I love all of you, and I would love hearing from you!!

[tenspontaneite]

Paper Cranes (18/?)

Hikaru makes an unappealing decision.

Hikaru woke, very late on Saturday, to his phone’s shrill ringing. He blinked out of sleep, bleary-eyed, and fumbled clumsily for the handset on the windowsill for several seconds before he managed to pick it up and answer the call. “Yeah?” He said, in a kind of garbled slur.

“Shindou.” Yashiro’s voice came through, sounding mildly scolding. “Well, you’re alive, at least.”

He struggled to parse the meaning of the words, then remembered: “Oh, right.” He mumbled. “I didn’t send a text. Sorry.”

“Set an alarm or something.” The other boy sighed. “Everything alright?”

“Mm, yeah. Utagawashi thinks he’s stalled the crazy guy. Only a week to go.” Hikaru reported, not quite awake. “I’m going back to sleep now.” He hung up and put the phone next to his pillow, lacking the willpower to sit up and put it anywhere else. He glanced, briefly, at the curled form of Setsu in the corner, then closed his eyes and went back to sleep.

---

When he woke, he could still feel the distant glow of the five-tails, standing like a brazier of blazing light. Setsu, closer to hand, was laying with one of its tails over its nose, and cracked an amber eye when he sat up.

“That fox is seriously noticeable.” He mumbled, sleepily, and rubbed at his eyes. He checked the time on his phone and found that it was already nine. His fingers were still clumsy with sleep when he typed to Utagawashi ‘I’m going to visit in a bit’, and he saw that the software ended up picking some weird kanji for it but he couldn’t bring himself to care. Utagawashi would figure it out.

Hikaru pushed himself out of bed and raised a hand in greeting to his vulpine roommate-of-sorts, before stumbling down the hallway to wash up a bit.

Ten minutes later, he was considerably more alert as he pulled on some clothes, feeling the first stirrings of nervousness at meeting a powerful spirit. “You’re sure the five-tails won’t eat me?” He asked Setsu, again, and the fox bared its teeth at him in what felt like a mock-threat.

It won’t eat you. The fox said, slightly exasperated.

“Well, if you’re sure.” Hikaru said, dubiously, and went to investigate breakfast possibilities in the kitchen. Once he had something in his stomach, he got a bag together and left the house, wincing a little at the bite of the increasingly-cold air. “Fuck, this is a cold October.” He muttered, walking briskly to try to get a bit warmer. Setsu trotted along beside him, looking quite smug. “I guess you don’t feel the cold.”

Not embodied, the fox agreed, with a swish of several bushy tails.

“…What does embodied mean?” He asked, first out loud, then he noticed that there were people around and winced.

The fox gave him a look. Obvious, it pointed out.

He reached back in a way he hadn’t tried to do properly for the purposes of communication since, well, Sai. He shaped his thoughts as clearly as he could into a coherent response: Yes, but how? Do you make a body? Possess one?

Setsu shrugged. Make one.

“…Isn’t that meant to be hard to do?” Hikaru asked, vaguely bothered.

He received another you’re-dumb look for his troubles. Yonbi, the fox reminded him.

“Well, how am I supposed to know how strong you have to be to make a body?” He shot back, annoyed, then realised he was talking out loud again. He was really out of practice. The thought of exactly why he was out of practice was ruthlessly supressed. An unpleasant thought of a different sort occurred to him, and he blurted it out without bothering to worry about nearby people. “Wait, if you’re strong enough to make a body, why hasn’t the demon?” he demanded.

The fox’s aura immediately soured, as it always did when the demon came up in conversation. It has. It said, shortly. Sword.

Hikaru stared. “So, what, it’s not like…a real sword that it’s attached to. The sword is actually its body.”

Very dangerous body. Setsu agreed, darkly, and then shook its head. There was a slight snarl edging its features. Hikaru wanted to ask why he got so bothered every time the demon was discussed, but he was shot a narrow-eyed stare before he could speak, as if the intent had been guessed and thoroughly disapproved of.

Hikaru felt slightly intimidated, and reminded himself of the fan in his hand to reissue some confidence. Still, though, he refrained from asking.

Then, as he walked a bit further, something else became obvious. He squinted into the distance, a little perplexed, and muttered “Are those more wards?” even as he reached out to inspect it himself. It wasn’t the shrine, wasn’t Utagawashi’s house, and was a hell of a lot weaker than even the wards on his own house, but…

The direction of it registered and clarity dawned. “Oh, right, my grandpa finally put up some ofuda.” He realised, becoming a little concerned at the weakness of the wardlight he could feel there. “Man, those wouldn’t keep away one of the one-tails, let alone a demon.” His tone was a little dismayed.

Setsu looked up at him, some of the ire slipping from its frame. A line of bristled fur along its spine settled. Less powerful, less sensitive, less devout. He pointed out. All matters.

So, those were the factors involved, then? “Can I make them any stronger?” He asked, frowning. If not, then there would be basically no point at all in getting Akari to set out some ofuda.

Pray, the fox recommended.

Hikaru blinked. “Yeah, okay.” So now he’d be making offerings for the protection of other people’s households as well as his own. He wondered at what point Inari got sick of warding people’s houses. He supposed not many people asked for that sort of protection these days, so maybe it wouldn’t make a difference?

He pondered the likelihood of getting all of his close friends to ward their houses, and how much bullshit it would require. He was fairly sure that Akari could be bribed, and Yashiro could probably be nagged into it….Waya, though, would resist just to be contrary, Touya would refuse unless every aspect of it was explained to him, and Isumi…he had no idea about Isumi. That guy could be weirdly unpredictable sometimes. He considered his chances of stealthily planting ofuda without the various occupants knowing about it, and decided them exceptionally low. Unless…Hikaru eyed Setsu.

The fox’s ears flickered, the movement in the soul itself feeling like suspicious/wary. It angled itself slightly towards him as they walked. Query? It asked, expectant.

“Would you plant ofuda in my friends’ houses for me?” He inquired. “I couldn’t do it, because whenever I’m over at their places they expect me to play Go with them. But you’re sneaky, you could do it.”

Setsu sighed. No.

“Not even if I buy you fresh inarizushi?” He prodded, temptingly.

The fox’s aura wavered, then clamped down firmly on itself. No, it repeated.

Hikaru hadn’t really expected anything different, but even so… “Why?” He asked. “Because you’re meant to be following me?”

Sort-of, it hedged, then relented. Ask small ones, maybe.

He took a moment to parse that. “…One-tails, you mean?” He clarified, and watched the assent flicker in the other spirit. “Can they even carry ofuda? Can they, um, embody?”

Most, no. Setsu rolled its eyes. Inari ofuda are easy to carry, though.

“Hmm,” Hikaru tapped his fan against his other hand, thoughtfully. “Well, I might try that, then. Thanks.” All of the small foxes seemed pretty spread out at the moment, though, and it wasn’t like he had any more ofuda packs at the moment, anyway.

He’d have considered following up the matter and asking how exactly incorporeal foxes would go about putting corporeal ofuda onto corporeal things, but…well, he was getting pretty close to the shrine. And that five-tails…its light was increasingly overwhelming. Sort of like the demon had been, but without the accompanying aggression and madness and lust-for-blood.  He fell quiet as he approached, a sort of instinctive part of him saying excuse me, I notice you’re approaching something very strong, would you like to reconsider-

Hikaru regarded the torii, took a steadying breath, and strode the final metres to pass beneath it, the shrine’s otherness washing over him even as he found himself vaguely blinded by the wards again. And then, of course, there was the fox.

He stopped and stared for several seconds before he remembered his shrine etiquette and went to purify himself. Utagawashi apparently felt him and approached while he was at it. The two-tail that had been shadowing him went to greet Setsu, their varied tails flickering all over the place. It seemed to be a happy greeting.

“Shindou-kun,” The priest greeted, happily. “That five-tails you said is here – I can feel it!”

“If you couldn’t, I’d be seriously worried.” He said, drying himself off and turning to the priest. His eyes slid, irrevocably, to the bright shape sat beside the fox statue where they’d made offerings, before. Cautiously, he brushed by the priest and approached it.

It was big. Bigger than Setsu by a pretty large margin. He’d seen bears smaller than this thing – black bears, mind you, which weren’t that big, but the point remained: it was big. In terms of appearance, it was the same as all the other Inari foxes – white all over, except for the black ears and the red bib-scarf thing around its neck. It stood quite still, its eyes calm as it regarded him, and five tails billowed gently around it.

The feeling of its actual spirit was immensely bright. Brighter than the wards, certainly.

When Hikaru felt he was at a respectable distance, he offered a short bow of greeting. “It’s good to meet you.” He offered, as politely as he was capable of. “I’m Shindou Hikaru.”

The gobi inclined its large head. Unlike Setsu, this fox’s eyes were vividly blue. Well met, human child. it whispered to him, reaching out with a faint tendril of its presence to touch him with the thought. It didn’t offer a name of its own.

Utagawashi came to stand beside him, looking where he was looking. “You can see it?” He asked, lowly. “Hear it?”

“Yeah, easy.” He nodded, eyes still riveted on the rather powerful spirit. “It’s…really not trying to hide. At all.” Amusement flickered from the five-tails, and a tail or two twitched at the tips. He turned to it, feeling both intimidated and vaguely awkward. “You’re…here because of the demon, right?”

The five-tails remained calm, pristine, and positively incandescent. Yes, it agreed.

“Why this shrine?” He asked, carefully. “I’ve got some foxes following me, and so’s Utagawashi, and I guess that’s because Kaminaga might come after us. But why this shrine?”

It seemed to approve of the question. When the enemy breaks free, it said, each thought-word burning into his mind with the near-heat sensation of its power. It will come for you. This shrine is closest: you will bring it here. This will be the battleground.

There was the distinct sensation of hairs rising on the back of his neck at the words. So, the foxes were here because they thought the demon was going to completely break free of Kaminaga’s restraints? “We…have an exorcist coming, though.” He said, uneasily. “An onmyouji. If he can’t exorcise the demon…can’t he…I dunno, re-seal it? It’s not completely out yet, so…” Hikaru shrugged, well aware that he knew precisely fuck all about how demons or apparently-sealed demons worked.

The gobi blinked, slow. Perhaps. Was its response. A skilled human may be able to seal it again, and put the threat away for another thousand years. Then we would not be needed.

Hikaru stared. “…Thousand years?” He repeated, weakly.

It is very old. The fox informed him, sedately. The eldest remaining in this world, yet sealed for a very long time. The last time it threatened to break free was nearly a millennium past – it was resealed, then. There was a shrug of tails. Perhaps history will repeat itself.

“Shindou-kun.” Utagawashi said, with a quiet insistence. Hikaru looked over and found him looking quite impatient for a translation. He held up a hand in a universal ‘wait’ gesture and returned his eyes to the fox.

“Can’t you seal it?” He pressed.

Its ears flicked. That is beyond my power.

“Shindou-kun.” The priest repeated, more firmly, while Hikaru was puzzling over that response. Some human guy could plausibly seal a seriously old demon, but a spirit as strong as this one couldn’t? That was…weird.

“So, the five-tails says that demon’s seriously old.” Hikaru explained, distractedly. “And that maybe it can be sealed again, but all the foxes are around in case it can’t be, and they have to fight it.” He hesitated, and added “I’m supposed to come here if it comes for me.” He would much rather abscond to Osaka again, but…if Kaminaga came in the middle of the night again, it wasn’t like he could get to the train station, so the shrine really would be the best place to head to.

“Then, Arakawa-san should be aiming to seal it?” Utagawashi asked, and Hikaru nodded. “In that case, I suppose I ought to contact him and tell him so.”

“Make sure to mention that there’s foxes everywhere.” Hikaru suggested. “I don’t think spirits like this guy-“ he jerked a thumb in the direction of the five-tails, “-show up without a good reason. Might finally convince him that we’re right.”

Utagawashi eyed him disapprovingly, possibly because of his blasé way of referencing the gobi, and nodded. “True.” He murmured, extracting his phone from somewhere in his robes. Hikaru experienced a brief flash of disorientation, watching it, as he wondered if that was where Sai would keep a phone if for some bizarre reason he had one. The priest typed somewhat slowly and awkwardly on the keypad, then apparently sent off the message because he put the thing away again. Then he looked at Hikaru. “Why was it you came here today?” He asked, curiously.

“Mainly I wanted to meet the five-tails.” He answered, glancing briefly in its direction. “But also I wanted to see that message from Kaminaga.” He remembered what Setsu had said on the walk over. “And also get some more ward ofuda.”

“More, really?” Utagawashi questioned, disbelievingly. “For who?”

“My friends.” Hikaru shrugged, deeply uncomfortable at the topic. “I wouldn’t put it past that bastard to take someone hostage to get me to meet him.” Seeing the look on Utagawashi’s face, he added “if he gets more possessed, anyway.”

The priest stared at him for several seconds. “Tell me, Shindou-kun.” He said, pensively. “You can feel warded houses from a distance, correct?”

Hikaru frowned at him. “Yeah, duh.”

“So, Kaminaga-san almost certainly has that ability as well. Wouldn’t warding their houses just be…well, marking them out? It isn’t as though the inhabitants can tell when he is nearby, and stay inside.”

He stared at the priest in horror, then turned to Setsu. “Why didn’t you mention that?” he demanded, noticing just after he spoke that there was a feeling of chagrined surprise in the fox. It hadn’t thought of the danger, either?

The four-tails flicked all four tail-tips at him, its aura moving a little guiltily. I can’t think of everything. It claimed. Besides, would still be useful for other spirits. Hesitation. Best wait, though.

“What about Akari?” Hikaru considered the weak wards around his grandfather’s house with renewed horror. “She lives right next door to me. Is it worth getting her house protected?”

Indecision flexed in the yonbi’s energy. Probably not. It concluded, after some thought.

Hikaru scowled a little, and rounded on Utagawashi. “Why did you even give my grandpa the ofuda?” He asked, shuffling with agitation.

“…It was a few days ago.” The kannushi admitted, with a quiet sigh. “He must have taken his time, putting them up. Remember, it’s only recently that I became aware that ofuda could make a detectable ward at all.” There was a slightly pointed note to his last sentence, as if he were saying stop taking your worry out on other people.

“Bah.” He muttered, forcing his shoulders out of their uncomfortable hunching. He glanced around and found the five-tails looking exactly as peaceful and unruffled as it had the whole time. It was kind of annoying, actually. Was it completely unconcerned by everything that was going on? Was it so confident in its skills? Why all the doom and gloom, then? “Well. I guess, tell that monk guy that he’s going to need to seal the sword?” He suggested, suddenly very tired of the conversation. “Let me know how it goes, alright? I’m going to go...” He waved, unenthusiastically. “Home, I guess.”

Utagawashi eyed him. “Alright,” He agreed, slowly. Hikaru might have tried to figure out what that expression implied, but he was abruptly very sick of absolutely everything and did not have the patience.

“Okay.” He said, and then turned to stomp out of the shrine grounds without so much as a goodbye.

---

Hikaru spent the walk home sinking more and more thoroughly into his own bad mood, irrationally bothered by everything. Like, cars. Why did they have to be driving down roads when he needed to cross them? Why couldn’t they be driving past a few seconds earlier, or later? And, ugh, weather. The wind kept blowing strands of his getting-too-long hair into his mouth and it was far more annoying than it had any right to be. The air was cold and annoying, his fingers were numb and that was also annoying, and everything sucked.

Setsu kept a little more distant than on the walk out, and didn’t attempt to communicate with him, which Hikaru was grateful for. He was probably not fit for company at the moment. He arrived home and divested himself of his outerwear, except he was too irritably impatient about it and turned his coat sleeve inside out and caught his sleeve on the zip-

Hikaru snarled at his clothing and pulled some threads loose with his less-than-graceful yanking, kicked his shoes into their place, then stormed upstairs. He closed his door with perhaps more force than was necessary and then flopped almost aggressively into his bed, face-first.

He breathed into the covers, breath making them uncomfortably warm against his face, and contemplated how utterly sick he was of this whole ridiculous situation. Why the fuck did he have to get a demon after him? Why did it have to be the oldest one still around, for god’s sake? He didn’t want to be worrying for his life, or Utagawashi’s life, or his grandpa’s life, or his friends’ lives, or anyone’s lives. He was a fucking teenager. He should be worrying about being awful at karaoke, or something equally senseless. He didn’t want to have to worry about being possessed, and for that matter he didn’t want to have to deal with his fucked up soul either, or the constant grief and shitty dreams and…fuck, everything. He was so damned sick of it all.

He spent several miserable minutes face-down in his duvet, feeling thoroughly sorry for himself, and…really, very tired. It was exhausting, having to maintain force-of-will at all times, having to constantly modulate despair with determination, but if he stopped he’d be depressed and hopeless and useless on top of everything else and that wouldn’t do him any good, would it?

Hikaru experienced, for a moment, a very strong urge to abscond to Osaka and just not worry about the demon. Arakawa and the foxes would deal with it, right? Except, the five-tails seemed to have a plan that involved him being the bait. Was that necessary? Was it really necessary?

He extracted his face from the bedding, blinking blearily. Setsu was present, but was keeping its aura quiet.

“Why do I need to be here to be the bait?” He asked, voice sounding kind of dull even to his own ears. “I’m pretty sure Utagawashi could draw Kaminaga and the demon to the shrine without me. Can’t I go and hide for a week?” He rolled onto his side, so as not to strain his neck.

Setsu raised its head and looked at him. Its eyes were dark, and there was a quiet grimness to its own mood. Your choice. Was all it said, but its aura…twisted. Resignation. I won’t go with you. It added, after a moment.

Hikaru eyed it tiredly. “You’d stay here, to fight the demon?”

The fox sighed, and wrapped all four tails around itself. Yes.

“You don’t seem too happy about that.” He said, in what was a fairly significant understatement.

I don’t want to die. It said, simply, and wow that was depressing-

“Very optimistic.” His mouth said, and Hikaru felt pretty disconnected from it. “You’ve got a five-tailed fox with you. Don’t you think that will be enough?”

If it comes to a fight? No. The fox’s black mood was, by this point, nearly a mirror of his own.

Hikaru stared at the wall behind the fox. “Why fight then? If you’re just going to die?” Every word out of his mouth depressed him more, fucking hell.

Because, Setsu said, with a quiet dignity. Evils like that one should not exist. I can fight it, so I will. Weary, forced humour. I might even win.

Fuck you, Hikaru thought, and wasn’t entirely certain he stopped himself from projecting it. But…just…fuck it. Fuck everything. “And I guess I, with my wondrous magical fan, would make a difference.” He said, flatly.

The fox lifted its head, staring at him carefully. Well. Yes. It offered. The thought-words felt neutral, but…there was a little spark of hope there. Small. Cautious. Guarding against disappointment, like Hikaru did when he thought of finding Sai. Ugh.

Hikaru collapsed heavily into the bed. “Okay.” He told the pillow, fed up but resigned. “Okay.”

That was that, then.

It is your choice, the fox insisted, after a couple of minutes of silence had passed. I chose to fight. You don’t have to.

Hikaru raised his head just enough to speak clearly. “It’s not a choice.” He pointed out, voice far calmer than he felt. “Not really. Even if I wanted to hide – you’d just die, and then…I can’t stay in Osaka forever, you know? I’d have to come back.” And then I’d get eaten, went unsaid. The fox stared at him, but didn’t try to deny it. “Besides,” He added, allowing his face to fall again, and muffling the remaining words with bedding. “I’m…not that much of a dick, you know.”

What the hell else could he do, except agree to stay and join the fight? It wasn’t a choice. Not at all. Not with Utagawashi’s life on the line, and Setsu’s, and maybe even his own. Sai would be seriously disappointed in me if I left, I think, he mused to himself, and the harsh yank on his emotions went a long way towards solidifying his resolve. Still, what a shitty decision to have to make…

Setsu’s aura twisted, conflicted emotions stamped there. In the end, it didn’t say anything.

He breathed into fabric for a couple more minutes, then got so sick of being awake with his thoughts and no distraction that he pulled his phone out and stared at it, briefly. Then he dialled Yashiro’s number. It went to the answer box, but more or less as soon as he’d cancelled it off he got called back.

“What’s up?” The other boy’s voice came with a kind of subtly-veiled urgency, a bit of worry. “Are you bleeding out on the pavement? Is this your goodbye call?” The words were clearly not serious, but there was a very real note of concern there. Hikaru found it abruptly hilarious, and snorted.

“What, you think you’d be who I’d call if I was dying?” He asked, with half-hearted mirth. “Not, like, my mum?”

“I bet I’m up there on the last-message list.” He said, with certainty. “You’re too much of a headache to have that many close friends. I’m definitely in the top five.”

Hikaru listened to this proprietary bullshit with a sort of weary bemusement. He was too emotionally wrung out and exhausted to muster a very strong reaction to anything, but… “Yeah, you’re totally right.” He admitted, rolling over and allowing his back to sink into the mattress.

“Naturally.” Yashiro said, sounding a bit more genuinely nonchalant now and less like he was preparing to call in the cavalry. “So, what’s up with the call? That’s not usually your thing.”

Hikaru considered that. “I’m bored.” He lied, because it was much less complicated than saying ‘my thoughts are currently the devil and I desperately need distraction’. “You want to do some blind Go over the phone?”

“What, and you don’t have any salons to go to?”

“I could go play Touya, but I think he’s going to torture me for information the next time I see him.” He informed the other professional. “Ideally I want to play someone that can absolutely destroy me, but if I spend too much time around Ogata he tries to blackmail me, and I don’t have the numbers of any other title holders.”

“…I don’t even know where to start answering that.” Yashiro decreed. “I guess I’m flattered I’m your next choice? But...what the fuck is Ogata Judan blackmailing you about?”

“This NetGo player he thinks I know something about.” Hikaru replied, with a twinge of pain. “He’s only trying, though. It’s not gonna work.”

“…So you do know something about the NetGo player?”

His bullshit reserves were pretty low at this point. He paused, and said “Yeah, but if you tell anyone I said that I’ll deny it until I die.” He shook his head. “Anyway, blind go or no blind go?”

“I hardly want to let you go off and get blackmailed by some title holder with a drinking problem, do I?” Yashiro answered, wryly. “Sure, I can manage a game. Who has black?”

“You take it. Let’s play without komi, too.”

The other boy whistled. “Want a challenge, huh?”

“I literally just told you that I do. Are you going to play or not?” A hint of impatience, now.

“Duh. Hm…16-4.”

Hikaru relaxed into the bed, and put the goban into his mind. “4-4.” He answered, and the game was on.

As he’d hoped, the mental focus involved in visualising each of the moves while simultaneously thinking very far ahead was more than sufficient to distract him from his woes. The game took forty minutes, was a loss for him, and went a long way towards gaining him some equilibrium. Once the discussion had been concluded, he felt considerably more human.

“Thanks, Yashiro.” He said, building the prelude to hanging up. “Good game.”

“I beat you for once.” The other boy said, with good cheer. “So of course it was. Anyway, remember to message this evening. You know the drill.”

Hikaru blinked. “Why? I’ve just been on the phone with you for like an hour.”

“You could easily get slaughtered in the next few hours.” He explained.

“I’m probably not gonna leave the house again today, so…nah.”

“Well, whatever.” Yashiro made a sort of psh noise over the phone. “Remember you can always come stay here for a few days, and not have to worry about death by crazy swordsman.”

Hikaru eyed his ceiling ponderously. “Yeah, sure.” He said, wistfully. “I’ll let you know if I decide to flee to your waiting bosom.”

Yashiro snorted. “You do that.” He said. “Remember to message.” Then, without further ado, he hung up.

He sat up, after a few minutes, and contemplated his not-quite-empty room. He looked at Setsu, who had largely ignored the half of a blind game he’d been privy to, and who was curled up in a corner again. He eyed the fox thoughtfully.

It lifted its head. What?

“Could you get a fox to disrupt my grandpa’s wards?” He asked, leaning forwards. “Like, pluck a couple ofuda off the walls, get the wards off of the house so Kaminaga can’t sense them?”

Setsu tilted its head, apparently considering it, then produced a really loud spike of his spirit that felt like an oddly specific concept. Hikaru made a face, having no idea of where to start with interpreting something like that, and then was distracted by the small white fox that approached with alarming speed.

Four-tails-called? It yipped, delightedly, curling around the much larger fox with its single tail flicking and frolicking. It occurred to Hikaru that the oddly specific concept might have been some sort of…like, a name? Some kind of identifier?

Go to weak-ward-place and steal master-ofuda. Enough to break-down wardlight. Setsu instructed, every dip and ripple of its aura easily ‘audible’ to Hikaru, and weirdly different from what he was used to. It was…concise, and again, oddly specific. What would have been longer thoughts were squashed down into something weirdly-shaped but much quicker to communicate with. It was kind of like the difference between using the kanji for something or writing it all out in hiragana, he decided, oddly fascinated by it.

The small fox’s reaction to its task was best translated as ooooh, with its aura twisting in noticeable patterns of pleased-to-receive-task as well as delight-at-mischief and a bit of sneaky-sneaky-me frittering into everything. Hikaru watched with bemusement as some more tail frolicking occurred, the little fox twisted in a happy circle, and then absconded as quickly as it had come.

“…Do you, like, have a spirity language?” He asked, honestly intrigued, and Setsu returned its focus to him.

Less a language, more a way of…abbreviating. Patterns-of-thought. Setsu hedged, and that last bit felt like its own…well, thought-kanji, if he was going to use that metaphor. It was kind of weird, because if he paid attention it was really obvious what was being communicated, but it was…arranged differently.

Hikaru thought of the very specific concept grouping that seemed to be the small fox’s name, and tried to twist his own energy into the same shape. Setsu openly snickered at his attempt, and reproduced the pattern for reference, in the spiritual equivalent of large print. He squinted, and tried again, coming a little closer this time. It felt…weird. How was he even doing it?

Hikaru took a very close look at what he was doing, perplexed. It didn’t seem like a soul in as dire a state as his should be able to move that way, after all. But…it wasn’t quite the same thing, was it? When he reached out with his senses, it wasn’t really his soul that was stretching. It was…something else. Something that was really hard to quantify as anything other than ‘spiritual energy’….which was the same stuff his soul was made of. Hikaru found himself suddenly very full of questions regarding the nature and composition of souls, and what exactly he was using to try to spell out some random fox’s name.

Instead, he asked “Do all spirits have a…name thing, like that?” Then, before Setsu could answer: “Is it some sort of bullshit fantasy true-name, or something?”

Setsu stuck out its tongue and made a rude noise. Then it laughed at him. No, dumb child. It said. We choose the names. They contain information about ourselves that we are comfortable sharing. Look at the little one’s name. The name was shaped again, very clearly.

Hikaru peered at it, closely. It was so specific, way more complicated than the concept-thought, but if he really looked at it, it was shaped like recognisable things. This one mainly had likes-to-sneak-around in it, with enthusiastic overtones of really-likes-Inarisama-because-Inarisama-is-cool. It was kind of like reading the online profile of a twelve-year-old, actually. “…I’m guessing you can change these, then.” He said, reluctantly amused. He could imagine that lots of spirits would end up with names that embarrassed them eventually, otherwise.

Yes. Usually every few decades or so. Setsu nodded, then looked at him pensively. I changed my own recently. Look. A new shape-concept formed, much more streamlined-feeling than the younger fox’s had been. There was almost a handwriting difference, in a sense – as if the younger fox’s name had been messily formed, and this one was composed with long practice and care.

Bestows-obscure-knowledge, said Setsu’s name-concept. Explains-the-way-of-things. Another part stated has-four-tails. There was also a weird sort of add-on to it, shaped like attached-to-this-one with the hint of someone else’s name there.

Hikaru attempted to form it, very awkwardly, and received a lot of toothy laughter for his troubles. He scowled and made several more attempts, becoming progressively neater about it, and wondered a little at the contents of Setsu’s name. “So, like, did you translate that into Japanese when you called yourself Setsu?” He inquired. “If you write it with the character for ‘theory’, it would sort of match.”

Yes, the fox confirmed, several tail-tips twitching. It was evidently enjoying the topic, and very entertained by his fumbling attempts to shape its name.

“What’s this bit on the end?” Hikaru asked, isolating the bit that seemed to be referring to another spirit.

Setsu appeared to consider his words. It shaped the name, which read like clarity-of-thought-and-purpose, and then said is my wife.

Hikaru eyed the fox, taken-aback. “Spirits get married?” He asked, dubiously.

The four-tails bared its teeth. Have you never heard of a fox wedding?

He had, actually. Just a little piece of folklore most people heard at some point, generally when there was rain from a mostly-sunny sky and the older people started talking knowingly about sun-showers and fox’s weddings. The general gist of it seemed to be that a sun-shower indicated that some foxes were getting married, and if you showed up uninvited something unspecified but bad would happen to you.

“…Huh.” Hikaru said, not knowing what else to say on the matter. He tried to shape Setsu’s name again, and managed it a bit better this time. “Do all spirits have these?”

All spirits who interact with other spirits. Or most. Setsu shrugged its shoulders in a furry shift of muscles. You could choose one, if you wanted?

Hikaru stared. “I wouldn’t know where to start.”

But then you could introduce yourself like a civilised spirit. Setsu grinned at him again, the spirit-words forming a mocking undertone.

“I’m not a spirit.” He pointed out, shaping obvious in his own energy for emphasis. Then he paused. “How would you say ‘Go’ in spirity language thing?”

Setsu pushed a word at him, because there was apparently a specific and fairly complex word for Go which was composed of old-game-of-stars-in-black-and-white. It was very pretty, actually. Poetic, even. Hikaru eyed the word, fascinated, and then set swiftly to work trying to reproduce it.

He spent the next couple of hours soliciting various word-concepts from Setsu and practicing them until he could shape them pretty fluently, especially the one for Go.

By the end of the evening, he’d settled on something simple, but effective. Setsu assured him he could change it in a timespan shorter than ‘decades’ if he wanted to, so for now, Hikaru would be introducing himself with a concept shaped like Go-playing-human-boy-on-a-quest.

---

The main problem with Monday was that he had the Serizawa study session to go to. This itself was not precisely a problem, but…well, Touya also attended the Serizawa study sessions. Which meant that the boy would have another opportunity to corner him and start the interrogations.

Hikaru woke up feeling mildly apprehensive about this, and bothered Setsu about his name-shape to take his mind off of it.

“How’s this?” He asked, forming the pattern of it more quickly and efficiently than he’d been able to the night before. “Anything I can do to clean it up?”

Setsu rolled its eyes at him, but obligingly inspected his spiritual ‘handwriting’ for him. Your young-male pattern needs work. It pronounced, after some thought, and demonstrated the shape which translated approximately to ‘boy’, switching between what he was doing and what it should look like to outline the difference. Hikaru inspected it, and tried to correct the pattern, receiving a nod of approval for it.

“What else?” He’d practiced the ‘Go’ pattern religiously, almost literally, so he was quite sure he wasn’t making any mistakes there. It was a really nice one, too. Aesthetically pleasing, in a way that was hard to describe. He was full of approval for one of his favourite things having such a nice representation.

Setsu shrugged. Mostly fine. Work on practice-speed.

Hikaru acquiesced, focusing. Go-playing human boy on a quest, he shaped, again and again, as quickly as he could. From what he’d seen, spirits were generally very speedy about the presentation of their name-shapes, and he wasn’t quite up to par. Go-playing human boy on a quest, he repeated, and idly wondered what Sai’s shape would be.

All spirits who interact with other spirits, Setsu had said. Sai, to his knowledge, had never interacted with other spirits.

Hikaru wanted, badly, to ask Setsu about ghosts. He was fairly sure that the fox would answer him. Hell, that was in its name. ‘Explains the way of things’ was very definitely in there. He would finally, finally have answers. He could ask. He could ask now.

Hikaru opened his mouth, wavered, and did not ask.

Setsu looked at him, curious, because he was surely displaying fear for all the spirits around to see, but he…couldn’t ask. He’d been searching for answers for so long, and now they were close enough to grasp, but…

Coward, he told himself, savagely, but failed to struggle through the terror of what answers might be forthcoming.

Query? Setsu asked, and he shook his head at the fox.

“Not now.” He said, and pressed the answer into his mind. Later, he told himself. I’ll ask, but later. And, he reasoned, it was even logical. It was possible that Setsu would have answers he really didn’t want to hear, after all. The loss of any part of his resolution could prove seriously, substantially bad when there was this demon thing going on – he really couldn’t afford to collapse into a despairing sack of flesh when lives were at risk.

It made sense. It was a bit of a stretch, but it did make sense. It still didn’t remove the scathing thread of thought that accused him of cowardice, though.

“Is it rude to make spirit name things for other people?” He asked, instead of what he really should have been asking.

Setsu blinked at him. Who?

“Like…human people I know who probably won’t ever be able to make their own names.” He said, a little evasively.

The pattern in the spirit said not-a-problem. Setsu added after a pause some spirits refer to others with self-made names for them. Only done by close-friends, though. Rude otherwise.

Hikaru really wasn’t sure how he’d spirit-name any of his friends. He wasn’t nearly familiar enough with its conventions to try. But, he supposed Touya could be easiest? Something like Go-playing-rival-boy? He knew most of that already.

After a break for thought, he asked after the shaping of rival, and then had a name for one of his friends. That he would probably never use. Still, Setsu informed him that it was a pretty standard sort of friend-name.

Usually involves reference to your connection. ‘Rival’, here. Setsu explained. Sometimes, can include reference to events, or close-held-humour. That last bit, itself, was a weird looking concept, which turned out to translate to ‘inside jokes’.

And then suddenly Hikaru had an idea for Yashiro, and later, a name which Setsu decreed a perplexing but typical example of the inside-joke type friend name. Yashiro was christened Go-playing-boy-I-made-a-dog-with, and it was wonderful. Pity he’d never have opportunity to use it.

He was half-way through contemplating a name for Akari when his phone rang. He fished it out of his pocket, slightly wary, and then became even more so when he saw that it was Utagawashi calling. He answered, and wondered if this was what Yashiro had felt like when he called – guarded and concerned. “What’s up?”

“Good news,” Utagawashi said, voice very pleased, and Hikaru cautiously allowed himself some optimism at the words. Not too much, though.

“What kind of good news?” He asked.

“Apparently Arakawa-san trusts me enough to know I wouldn’t lie about the presence of foxes. And he considers it a worrying sign that they’re here.” The priest said, a little triumphant. “He’s coming earlier. Should arrive here late Thursday afternoon.”

A slight thrill of shock, and a weird suspense, jolted through him. “What, really?” He said, taken-aback.

“Indeed.” Utagawashi confirmed. “He wants to see the foxes for himself, and also to meet you, Shindou-kun. After that he’ll be taking a late train to Yokohama.”

“He thinks he can seal the demon?” Hikaru wasn’t sure what to think. Part of him had put the monk, very firmly, into ‘unreliable adult’ category, and from there on he had fully expected to not be able to rely on the guy to do anything sensible. It was a bit weird to try to mentally reclassify him as a decent human being. “Did you mention how the foxes all think it’s super bad news?”

“Obviously.” The man said, a little tartly. “He’s bringing a sealing receptacle, and a small fortune in ofuda and blessed items.”

Setsu, by this point, was looking very interested. It was sat upright, ears fully erect and twitching in Hikaru’s direction. I will speak with this one. It said, and Hikaru blinked at it.

“The monk?” He asked, and the fox nodded. Utagawashi made a sound of confusion over the phone and he returned his attention there. “Setsu says that it’ll speak to Arakawa. I guess maybe to pass on some tips or advice or something?” The fox nodded again. “Yeah.”

Utagawashi was silent for a few seconds. “And the five-tails?”

Hikaru looked inquiringly at Setsu, whose furry shoulders shrugged. “Dunno.” He related, in response to the gesture.

“I’ll send a message that the four-tailed fox apparently wants to speak to him, then.” He sighed. “Well, that was all I had to tell you. Is there anything new on your end?”

He mulled it over, and decided that his having to stay in the path of danger was still too raw a topic for him to be comfortable discussing. “Not really.”

“I’ll get back to work, then.” As usual, he provided no further conversational embellishments before he hung up.

Hikaru put down his phone, and wondered what to do for the rest of the day, until the afternoon’s study session. Finding someone to play would be the sensible thing, but…

He thought. He looked over at Setsu. “Hey. You’ve seemed kind of interested in it, so – do you play Go?”

The fox’s ears perked with interest. I dabble, it said, and inched closer, eyeing the goban.

Hikaru was eyeing the goban himself. “Can you hold the stones?” he noticed that Setsu’s paws did not look especially good at the fine sort of coordination that stone placement required. And it was a spirit, besides.

Setsu considered it. Could embody, but not necessary. It trotted up to the goban, sat at one side of it, and then unexpectedly dissolved into an amorphous blur of spiritual light. Hikaru jolted in shock, brandishing his fan as the light swiftly turned spherical, gaining the appearance of a kind of glassy-looking object, the size of a tennis ball and approximately the ‘colour’ of Setsu’s soul. Sort of an amber-gold, maybe?

It didn’t keep the shape for long. White surged outwards from the sphere in another bright, amorphous mess, and swiftly reformed into a not-quite-human looking thing.

Hikaru stared. “What the fuck?” He expressed.

Setsu blinked at him out of a vaguely human-shaped form that was mainly made of translucent, shimmering light. The amber eyes were there, and the red neckerchief thing, but everything else was…indistinct. There was the suggestion of white clothes, maybe along the lines of a basic yukata, but nothing like facial features. The four tails were there, though, as similarly vague-looking lines of light. Lazy transformation, Setsu explained, and waggled a hand full of white, glowing fingers at him. They were the most solid-looking part of the spirit. Easier than embodying. And has hands.

“That’s the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen.” Hikaru said, half-shocked and half-fascinated. He was certain he was being laughed at but there was no facial feature to suggest it – just the tell-tale movement in the soul. “I guess you can take a proper human shape too, then? Like in all the stories?”

If I embody, Setsu agreed, vague head-shape inclining. Would prefer not to use that much energy now, though. It delicately avoided mentioning the demon.

Hikaru stared for several more seconds, then sighed explosively and went to sit by the goban. “Well, what the hell.” He said, settling in seiza and reaching for a bowl. “You’ve seen me play. Do you want a handicap, or…” he thought. He was not going to accept a handicap, even if Setsu was way stronger than him. “Well, I dunno.”

Setsu scrutinised the board. Or, well, it seemed like it was scrutinising the board. It was hard to tell when it lacked all facial features except for eyes, and even the eyes were just sort of amber-coloured slits. I will take black. It said, finally. No ‘komi’.

He nodded, and passed the black stones over, watching as fingers made of bright white light closed around the bowl. That implied Setsu thought it was at a lower level than he was, then. He took the white stone bowl and set it to his side, the lid next to it, and contemplated his situation. Here he was, about to play Go with a spirit several hundred years his senior, for the first time in years. It was kind of a painful position to be in, with reminiscence stabbing at him every other second, but…just different enough, in a number of ways. It wasn’t so bad.

Hikaru sighed, and eyed the spirit across the goban before he looked down. “Well then, let’s play.” He said, and bowed. “Onegaishimasu.”

A very specific-looking concept shape formed across from him as the bright shape bowed, and the game began.

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End chapter

Notes: So…response to last chapter was kind of exceptionally awesome? Over two hundred notes, lordy.

This is yet another chapter that was meant to cover way more ground than it did, but as usual, my characters started doing stuff, and I’m helpless to stop them. The spirit-naming thing is completely new, it didn’t exist until Setsu unexpectedly called for that little groupie fox, but I quite like it. The idea is since thoughts and emotions are ‘visible’ in spirits, they’d have a way of intentionally manipulating the shape of their energies to communicate, more efficiently than simply projecting thoughts at each other. A bit more privately, too, since you can send a lot of other stuff with thoughts by accident.

As always I probably won’t know what I really think of this chapter until a chapter or two later when my brain has properly disconnected from it, so let me know what you all think, aight?

04/06/18 – minor edits