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classicschronicles · 2 years

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Hi lovelies,

Whilst studying Classics over the last year and a half, I’ve found that there are a lot of reoccurring themes and texts that link together quite nicely (i.e. orientalism, or homeric allusions). However, no theme, text, or even character is as reoccurring as Alcibiades. It doesn’t matter what side of the course you may be studying, what book you may be reading- somehow he is there and honestly, fair enough, his story is iconic. So, without further ado, here is the story of Alcibiades.

Alcibiades was a brilliant and highly skilled Athenian politician, general, diplomat, turncoat (on more than one occasion), and all-round pretty boy (you just gotta trust me on this). Most famously known for switching sides during the Peloponnesian War, his flamboyant nature caused multiple scandals. He embraced laziness, excessive luxury, drinking, and brothel houses. Many sources note that he almost exclusively wore long purple robes in an attempt to feminise himself, and that he also had the planks of his ship taken out to make room for his much softer, pillow-filled, hammock. In his famous comedy ‘Frogs’, Aristophanes remarks about the Athenians, “They love, and hate, and cannot do without him”, which to be honest perfectly sums him up.

Born in Athens in around 450 B.C., Alcibiades was the son of a wealthy politician and a rich socialite. When his father died during Alcibiades’ youth, he was sent to live with his father’s near-distant relative, a leading Athenian statesman by the name of Pericles. According to Plutarch, Alcibiades possessed ample charm and was noted for his rapid speech, as well as a slight lisp. Indeed, Aristophanes pokes fun at him during one of his comedies stating remarking, “How very happily he lisped the truth.” However, from a young age, Alcibiades also displayed a very inconsistent character that would go on to later foreshadow his impulsive adult life. People often remarked that there was only one constant characteristic about him, and that was his desire to be seen as the best. Here’s a fun fact, when partaking in wrestling matches as a child, if he felt that he was losing, he would simply bite his opponent- a surefire way to win if you ask me! As a child, Alcibiades was often accused of being badly behaved and impulsive, a trait which would follow him well into his adult life.

As he entered adolescence, Alcibiades attracted many with exceeding beauty and apparent charm. Due to his social standing, general nature, and charisma, many people attached themselves to him in the hopes of elevating themselves through the looming success of his political career. Eventually, his good looks and charisma attracted the attention of the famed Greek philosopher, Socrates. According to most records, it was Socrates’ desire to aid Alcibiades as he thought that Alcibiades possessed all the makings of a well-balanced, and even kind, individual and that these qualities could be brought out with good counsel. And so, Athenians watched in awe as the young man followed Socrates around and the two developed a seemingly close bond. The two men fought together in an Athenian expedition against Potidaea. During the battle, Socrates defended an injured Alcibiades, thus saving his life. This favour was then returned when Alcibiades saved Socrates in the battle of Delium.

Although the two men had a deep friendship, and quite possibly more, their relationship was rather turbulent and arguably unhealthy. Socrates was famed for his moral moderation, and according to Plato’s symposium (as well as other sources), Alcibiades took this as a personal challenge and began to actively try and pursue a sexual relationship with Socrates, who consistently rejected him. Eventually, Alcibiades’ constant desire for supremacy and fame outweighed Socrates’ teachings and the two parted ways. During Socrates’ trial (resulting in his execution) he was charged with ‘corrupting the youth’ and the court would use the future actions of Alcibiades as evidence of Socrates’ corruption. I mean imagine being the main reason your ex boyfriend gets sentenced to death.

After his split from Socrates, Alcibiades entered Athenian politics, making a distinct impression on his first appearance in the Athenian assembly (something about his hiding a quail under his robes and then letting it escape and having to interrupt the assembly to catch it).

In 421 B.C. the Athenian politician Nicias negotiated a peace treaty between Athens and Sparta, bringing an end to the extensive war between the two states, Nicias’ victory angered Alcibiades- demonstrating the truly darker and jealousy-driven side of his personality. Alcibiades decided that he would do everything he could to end the peace before it came into full effect, literally out of pure spite. The opportunity presented itself when the Spartan embassy came to Athens to negotiate the terms of the treaty. Alcibiades invited the ambassadors to his house for dinner the night before the negotiations and asked them how much authority they had been given by Sparta regarding the next days’ negotiations. The ambassadors informed him that they had been given full authority to act as they saw fit in the negations, to which Alcibiades then informed the Spartans that they should not reveal the full extent of their authority to the assembly lest the Athenians try to take advantage of them. He advised them to tell the assembly that they had limited powers and ensured that he would handle the rest. The following day, upon informing the Athenian assembly of their apparent powers, Alcibiades stood in protest and called the Spartans deceitful. The assembly quickly turned on the confused ambassadors and chased them out of the city. The peace was ruined, war renewed, and Nicias looked like a fool.

Upon the renewal of the war, Alcibiades was made a general and went off to help communities that had been pressed by the Spartans. As a result, he managed to liberate the Argives, the Eleans, and Mantinea, and formed a coalition with them against Sparta. With the help of his new alliances, he also managed to liberate the people of Argos and convinced them to rebuild their city using Athenian materials, an act which won him great support amongst Athenians.

In 415 B.C., Alcibiades began to push Athens towards invading the island of Sicily, a territory that Athens had been eyeing since the rule of Pericles. His close friends Socrates and rival/ fellow general Nicias tried to prevent the invasion. However, Alcibiades’ charisma and managed to sway the assembly who appointed him, Nicias and Lamachus as generals of the expedition. Plutarch goes as far as to suggest that Nicias was appointed as a general to balance the impulsivity of Alcibiades and Lamachus. However, seem before the expedition was set to take place, an ill omen appeared. During the feast of Adonis, several sacred busts of Hermes were vandalised. The vandalism caused a wave of panic throughout Athens who saw it as bad luck for the expedition. Although initially thought to be the wrongdoing of spies from Corinth, the blame began to shift over to Alcibiades. His enemies suggested that he and his friend be taken off of the Sicilian expedition and be made to stand trial.

However, as you may recall, the only reason the Argives and Mantineans agreed to send troops on the expedition was because of Alcibiades, and so the Athenian assembly feared that if he were taken off the expedition, the others would leave. The assembly, therefore, agreed to postpone his trial until he returned from his expedition despite Alcibiades requesting that the trial take place beforehand as he feared that in his time away people’s concerns and doubts about him may be exacerbated.

The Sicilian expedition began with a victory for Athens, but back in Athens, the pot was being stirred. Alcibiades’ enemies managed to take him to trial in absentia. Alcibiades was convicted on all accounts and sentenced to execution upon his return. The Athenian assembly sent a ship to bring Alcibiades back from Sicily, but the crew were given explicit instructions to not let him find out why he was being summoned, fearing that it could cause mutiny in the army.

Now here is where the story gets INTERESTING. Alcibiades left with the Athenian assembly, but not before sending his troops to help prevent Messena from falling into Athenian hands. He knew why he was being asked to return and when his ship stopped to resupply, he made his escape. Plutarch remarks that upon escaping Alcibiades claimed “I will make them (Athens) feel that I am alive.” Trust me, he did just that.

Alcibiades fled to Argos but soon found it too dangerous and asked Sparta for sanctuary. He promised advice to Sparta in their war against Athens in return for safety and protection. Sparta welcomed him into the city and in return Alcibiades advised them to renew the war and fortify their hold in Deccelea. Sparta, thanks to his advice, began to achieve several victories against Athens and encouraged many islands to revolt against Athenian control. Guys icl, I aspire to be this spiteful. Whilst in Sparta, Alcibiades embraced stoic Spartan culture, cutting his hair, taking cold baths and eating with the Spartan troops. Indeed, Plutarch claims that Alcibiades was a genius adaptor and was able to change his character to suit the culture he was immersed in.

However, Alcibiades’ time in Sparta came to a very abrupt ending because, get this, he was having an affair with the Spartan king’s wife. Whilst King Agis was away fighting the Athenians, Alcibiades got his wife Timaea pregnant. Alcibiades’ treachery, as well as the growing resentment of the Spartan army as he was receiving all the credit for the Spartan victories, led to yet another speedy escape for Alcibiades. With the two most powerful Greek states wanting him dead, Alcibiades made his way to Persia.

Alcibiades found sanctuary with the Persian king Tisaphernes, who famously hated the Greek people. Whilst in Persia, Alcibiades embraced pomp and flamboyance. The Persians had been aiding Sparta in the fight against Athens, but Alcibiades advised the Persians to stay on amicable terms with both groups. At the same, Alcibiades sent word to the nearby Athenian navy at Samos and promised that he could arrange a Persian-Athenian alliance. However, Alcibiades knew that the Persian empire would never help the democratic state of Athens, so Alcibiades decided to, get this, literally overthrow Athenian democracy and set up an oligarchy. Alcibiades sent a friend to Athens to instigate a rebellion amongst the aristocracy, and the rebellion was a success. Democracy was overthrown, and an oligarchy consisting of nearly 400 aristocrats was established. Honesty, I’m still reeling over the fact that he just decided to overthrow democracy out of spite.

Alcibiades then joined the Athenian navy at Samos, who themselves were pro-democracy. They, unaware of his actions, appointed him general and begged him to sail home and restore democracy. However, Alcibiades convinced them that Athens in its current state could not survive as a democracy amid a civil war. With the navy at his side, Alcibiades went on to defeat Sparta at Abydos. He then proceeded to return to Persia where he was immediately thrown in prison, but no matter because he escaped less than a month later.

Alcibiades then went on to rejoin the Athenian navy and defeat Sparta in multiple locations. He eventually returned to Athens and was celebrated as a hero. He was acquitted of all his previous crimes and his property and wealth were restored to him. To further improve his image, Alcibiades organised protection for members of the Eleusinian mysteries. Many of Athens’s political leaders feared that Alcibiades’ popularity would lead to him attempting to become a tyrant, and sent him back to war to try and prevent this.

Unfortunately, his success was once again short-lived. The Athenian navy needed funds to compete with a Persian-backed Sparta, so he left the navy under the control of a general named Antiochus whilst he went to search for funds. Alcibiades ordered Antiochus not to engage in conflict with Sparta, but less than a few days later he did. This resulted in an all-out Spartan victory.

Back in Athens, Alcibiades’ enemies accused him of mismanaging the army and claimed that he left not to find funds but to drink and visit brothels which, for probably the first time in his life, was not true. The people of Athens once again turned on Alcibiades, who was then forced to flee to Thrace. Alcibiades embraced Thracian ways, organised a Thracian mercenary army and proceeded to plunder Northern Greece. Again the spite of this man. However, the Spartan king still wanted Alcibiades dead and sent assassins after him. Alcibiades fled to Persia hoping to get aid for Athens from the Persian king directly. Whilst he was awaiting a meeting with the king Alcibiades resided in a small village with his mistress Timandra. But, one night assassins burnt down his house whilst he slept.

Some accounts claim that Alcibiades ran out of the burning house in women’s clothing and fought the culprits to his death, whilst others claim that he died in the fire. All that is definitely known is that this was his final fight and he was buried alongside his mistress in the hills of Phrygia.

Alcibiades lived life to its fullest, evidently had no regrets, and was just all-round crazy. To be honest, I’m sort of high-key in love with him. I hope you all enjoyed reading about his crazy life as much as I did! Enjoy the rest of your weekend :).

#classical studies #greek mythology #ancient rome #ancient greece #dark acamedia #roman mythology #hellenic deities #ancient world #classics #history #athens #spartan #alcibiades #the absolute loml #im not kidding #i love him

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tiredguyswag · 1 year

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How would you compare US politicians and the rabble Brits like me have? For context, I suggest looking up 'MP's behaving badly' and some other stuff.

man i don't know enough about either of those countries to compare their politicians im not gonna lie

#asking moi

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yrsonpurpose · 10 months

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Alex taking for granted that Henry’s never had an American Thanksgiving, but it not really tracking that it’s been years since Henry had ANY kind of functional family dinner. And even then, his dad would be off on movie shoots or his mom would be doing royal duties and it was so rare they’d get together to share a meal that wasn’t also peppered with diplomats and politicians.

And Alex isn’t great with noticing subtle, but he sees how uneasy Henry is as Thanksgiving approaches, and he finally gets out of him that Henry doesn’t think he knows how to behave at a normal dinner. He’s so used to putting on that disaffected mask, or being alone with Alex or Bea or Pez. Sitting with Ellen and Oscar and Leo… Henry isn’t trained for that.

First, Alex gives him a quick, sloppy blow job to relax him. Then he crawls on top of Henry so he can’t run away and tells him that Ellen may have been President, but when she washes dishes and thinks no one is listening she sings Madonna songs (badly). Every year Oscar tries to make the turkey and every year he gives up and does tamales instead. And usually halfway through dinner when Alex and Nora have too much wine and start throwing food at each other Leo and June will wander off to play Jenga.

Alex says that there ISN’T any normal family dinner, and what Henry brings to it will be as wonderfully atrociously perfect as he always is. And if it’s shit, Alex knows where the camera blind spots are and he’ll fuck Henry by the azaleas and come back for pie with twigs in his hair. And it will be them. And that’s why it will be perfect.

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 love this idea thank uuuuu. alex making everything seem 'normal' to henry>>> same vibes as 'no one has ever had the nerve to be cheeky to a prince', bc alex just treats him like anyone else.

#asks #bc we didnt get any canon thanksgiving content (booooo) we have to live through fics !

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elvenfirefly · 2 years

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Backstory

Born and raised in a nomad goblin clan of Blackarrows, Zuzo was always a quirky soul. Ever since his youngest days, he sought different paths than his peers. When others shot from the bow and practiced with wooden swords, Zuzo was in the camp, repairing broken toys and patching rags. When others tamed wolves, Zuzo was learning advanced knots. This earned him a false reputation as a coward, and it made things worse when Zuzo explained how his woolen coats keep his friends alive in winter.

It took plenty of black eyes and broken noses (on both sides) and a useful rabbit trap design, for others to start respecting his unique skills. Nevertheless, when he was a teenager during one of the clan’s raids, Zuzo hid in a town shop, refusing to pillage and kill. Fate had it that Mr. Bonko, a shoemaker and the proprietor of the establishment, didn’t scream when he saw Zuzo, but rather showed compassion for the poor goblin. He saw Zuzo’s warm heart and gentle touch and gave him an opportunity for a better life. And Zuzo repaid it over twelve years of working in ‘Bonko’s Boots’. With his skills and quick wit, he made new, fashionable footwear and saved the shop from bankruptcy. Having no kids, Mr. Bonko left the establishment to Zuzo in his will.

And thus began a second wave of hardships for this peculiar goblin, having to fight stereotypes and prying eyes, ill-wishers, and thieves. He read about the law to defend against false accusations; he taught himself basic arcana, for protection. His business survived three arsons, two floods, and seven burglaries—he stood the ground until the last blaze. Retrieving his cindered belongings, he packed his arms and reputation and ventured into the world.

Court dances filled the next decade of his life. From wealthy merchants and politicians to nobles, kings, and emperors, there isn’t a posh person who Zuzo hadn’t clad. They could mock him about his heritage but they couldn’t deny his exceptional tailoring. All wanted his designs, even plotting to get him to be exclusive. However, he remained as he always was: a goblin of the highest professionalism with passion and intuition for a fine cut.

Eventually, the court stories bored him and he settled in a dilapidated Tralin’s Theater that got a new owner. It was a small town and a fresh page, a new challenge: to bring life to the establishment, to clad the actors in the finest, eccentric costumes, and lend his craft for joy, arts, and beauty.

Roleplaying Zuzo

Of Gentle Heart and Touch Zuzo finds beauty in art, kindness, and prosperity. However, he is prone to embarrass those who behave badly in his presence. His dextrous hands allow him to achieve the highest of craft levels, both tinkering and tailoring.

Prankster This jolly goblin enjoys a good laugh and is often the cause of one. He is famous for his practical pranks involving stage props, which force actors to improvise and often result in an even better performance. The audience loves it and is awaiting the prank during the show.

Daydreamer and selectively focused Zuzo often dozes off during a conversation, designing his next dress in his mind. During work, he’s highly focused and almost unperceptive of his surroundings. Almost, because the moment someone touches his tools, he snaps back to reality.

Notable Combat Features

Trained Arcanist — Zuzo is a magic user of medium skill with expertise in conjuration magic. In battle, he animates and conjures objects to aid him.

Impervious Fashion — When not in his working clothes, Zuzo dresses in the latest high-class fashion. His enchanted suits grant him temporary quickness, endurance, and resistance to mundane weaponry.

Ik, a needle friend — Zuzo’s most deadly weapon. This animated needle is quick, terribly hard to spot, and is connected to the endless thread in Zuzo’s back pocket. In battle, it pierces and ties Zuzo’s enemies. The rumors say he once sewed the mouth of a deceitful nobleman.

Dud, a mannequin friend — This faceless, well-dressed animated caricature is Zuzo’s assistant and butler. Sometimes Zuzo talks to it while working. In battle, Dud is capable of giving serious punches with its wooden fists.

Sharp mind, teeth, and eyes — Zuzo has good vision in darkness, a quick problem-solving mind, and razor teeth. He usually only needs the first two for any situation.

Design Notes

Fill the battlefield with the most comical and dangerous tools: suffocating coats, flying needles, self-tying silk, gigantic pin cushion, snake-like tailoring measure rope, and shin-kicking stools. Zuzo’s battles are usually light-hearted with the goal to shame his aggressors. However, he is capable of more advanced magic if needed.

Encounters

You encounter Zuzo as he and Dud are fighting a bunch of thieves in a local town.

You encounter Zuzo in Tralin’s Theater workshop. He’s not kind to thugs and thieves.

You find Zuzo in a local town where he confronts his past clanmates. They demand ‘absence payment’ from Zuzo.

You encounter Zuzo after a chase in a local town where the party managed to hide in his shop. He shelters them.

You stumble upon Zuzo chasing after frenzied Dud, whose incantations went awry. He is trying to prevent Dud from hurting anyone while protecting it from the guards.

You are pointed to Zuzo via a third party when searching for clothing enchantments.

Quest Hooks

Zuzo’s needle Ik is broken. He needs a starsteel ore to make a new one.

Zuzo needs you to capture the current leader of the Blackarrow clan who treats Zuzo’s cousins and past friends with cruelty.

Zuzo needs you to break into the royal treasury. The king has falsely accused Zuzo of witchcraft and has taken Zuzo’s most expensive cloth. He wants them back.

There is an enchantment that would grant Dud the mannequin sentient characteristics. He’d be able to speak and think and have a soul. Zuzo will give anything if you find it for him.

Zuzo needs the party to retrieve a special royal gown from the emperor’s tomb. By the myth, the gown possesses the most powerful clothing enchantments ever seen.

Zuzo needs the party to collect feathers from the Giant Eagles of the mountains. He will use them to make the new costume and will enchant the party’s clothes in return.

#dndart #dnd character #dnd npc #ttrpg #goblin art #dnd5e #dungeons and dragons #tailoring #fantasy art #fantasy character #elvenfirefly

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petnews2day · 5 months

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Outrage after US Governor reveals she shot her badly-behaved puppy

New Post has been published on https://petn.ws/ZObdn

Outrage after US Governor reveals she shot her badly-behaved puppy

Politicians and dog experts are criticising South Dakota Governer Kristi Noem after she wrote in a new book about killing a rambunctious puppy. The story — and the vilification she received on social media — has some wondering whether she’s still a viable potential running mate for presumptive Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump. Experts who […]

See full article at https://petn.ws/ZObdn #DogNews

#Dog News

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daimonclub · 7 months

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Quotes about travelling

Quotes about travelling Quotes about travelling, aphorisms, ideas, opinions and quotations about travels, travellers, holidays, tourisms and amazing places to visit around the world. The American arrives in Paris with a few French phrases he has culled from a conversational guide or picked up from a friend who owns a beret. Fred A. Allen Space travel! Come on, I don't even want to go to Rimini. Carl William Brown We are all pilgrims who seek Italy. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Memories are nothing more than a journey through time, almost always melancholic, nostalgic and painful. Carl William Brown My favorite thing is to go where I have never gone. Diane Arbus The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work. Richard Bach I am leaving the town to the invaders: increasingly numerous, mediocre, dirty, badly behaved, shameless tourists. Brigitte Bardot I have just been all round the world and have formed a very poor opinion of it. Sir Thomas Beecham Should we have stayed at home and thought of here? Where should we be today? Is it right to be watching strangers in a play in this strangest of theatres? Elizabeth Bishop The poor live their adventures, their journeys, their dreams thanks to cinema, theatre, social media, television and literature; the rich thanks to their money. Carl William Brown What childishness is it that while there's breath of life in our bodies, we are determined to rush to see the sun the other way around? Elizabeth Bishop

Quotes on travels Italy Life is nothing more than a journey through the valleys of the absurd, through the seas of stupidity, when we reach the port of madness there is no one waiting for us, we only then realize that we have traveled in vain. Carl William Brown There is no looking at a building here after seeing Italy. Fanny Burney Travel and society polish one, but a rolling stone gathers no moss, and a little moss is a good thing on a man. John Burroughs I don't like traveling very much, also because having to go to hell often isn't a very pleasant thing. Carl William Brown Travelers are like poets. They are mostly an angry race. Sir Richard Burton I am so convinced of the advantages of looking at mankind instead of reading about them, and of the bitter effects of staying at home with all the narrow prejudices of an Islander, that I think there should be a law amongst us to set our young men abroad for a term among the few allies our wars have left us. Lord Byron To understand what morality is, I recommend you read Beyond Good and Evil and then set off towards the boundless confines of stupidity. Have a good trip. Carl William Brown I swims in the Tagus all across at once, and I rides on an ass or a mule, and swears Portuguese, and have got a diarrhea and bites from the mosquitoes. But what of that? Comfort must not be expected by folks that go a pleasuring. Lord Byron The idea that seeing life means going from place to place and doing a great variety of obvious things is an illusion natural to dull minds. Charles Horton Cooley Many times politicians' trips abroad are nothing more than excellent opportunities to do their business with our money. Carl William Brown Traveling, you realize that differences are lost: each city takes to resembling all cities, places exchange their form, order, distances, a shapeless dust cloud invades the continents. Italo Calvino The traveler sees what he sees, the tourist see what he has come to see. Gilbert K. Chesterton The travel writer seeks the world we have lost - the lost valleys of the imagination. Alexander Cockburn By travelling at the speed of light we would stop time and become eternal. For us it is impossible, for stupidity it is not. Carl William Brown The routines of tourism are even more monotonous than those of daily life. Mason Cooley

Aphorisms on travelling When one realizes that his life is worthless he either commits suicide or travels. Edward Dahlberg The personal appropriation of cliches is a condition for the spread of cultural tourism. Serge Daney Tourism, human circulation considered as consumption, is fundamentally nothing more than the leisure of going to see what has become banal. Guy Debord Like all great travelers, I have seen more than I remember and remember more than I have seen. Benjamin Disraeli Death is nothing more than a journey without suitcases and without return; perhaps for this reason, it will be less boring than the others. Carl William Brown Journeys, like artists, are born and not made. A thousand differing circumstances contribute to them, few of them willed or determined by the will - whatever we may think. Lawrence Durrell Sailing round the world in a dirty gondola oh, to be back in the land of Coca-Cola! Bob Dylan Our instructed vagrancy, which has hardly time to linger by the hedgerows, but runs away early to the tropics, and is at home with palms and banyans, is nourished on books of travel, and stretches the theatre of its imagination to the Zambesi. George Eliot No man should travel until he has learned the language of the country he visits. Otherwise he voluntarily makes himself a great baby-so helpless and so ridiculous. Ralph Waldo Emerson Travel is a fool's paradise. Ralph Waldo Emerson Traveling is a fool's paradise. Our first journeys discover to us the indifference of places. Ralph Waldo Emerson The average tourist wants to go to places where there are no tourists. Sam Ewing It would be nice to travel if you knew where you were going and where you would live at the end or do we ever know, do we ever live where we live, we're always in other places, lost, like sheep. Janet Frame Death is nothing other than the final destination of our stupid earthly journey. Carl William Brown The fool wanders, a wise man travels. Thomas Fuller Travel makes a wise man better, and a fool worse. Thomas Fuller Traveling is like gambling: it is always connected with winning and losing, and generally where it is least expected we receive, more or less than what we hoped for. Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe A wise traveler never depreciates their own country. Carlo Goldoni If time travel existed, we would be inundated with tourists from the future. Carl William Brown A man who leaves home to mend himself and others is a philosopher; but he who goes from country to country, guided by the blind impulse of curiosity, is a vagabond. Oliver Goldsmith I would like to spend my whole life traveling, if I could borrow another life to spend at home. William Hazlitt Writing and travel broaden your ass if not your mind and I like to write standing up. Ernest Hemingway They change their climate, not their soul, who rush across the sea. Horace To travel is to discover that everyone is wrong about other countries. Aldous Huxley Your true traveler finds boredom rather agreeable than painful. It is the symbol of his liberty -- his excessive freedom. He accepts his boredom, when it comes, not merely philosophically, but almost with pleasure. Aldous Huxley Being on tour sends me crazy, I drink too much and out comes the John Mcenroe in me. Chrissie Hynde Though there are some disagreeable things in Venice there is nothing so disagreeable as the visitors. Henry James Traveling makes a man wiser, but less happy. Thomas Jefferson As the Spanish proverb says, ''He who would bring home the wealth of the Indies, must carry the wealth of the Indies with him.'' So it is in traveling; a man must carry knowledge with him, if he would bring home knowledge. Samuel Johnson In traveling, a man must carry knowledge with him, if he would bring home knowledge. Samuel Johnson He who does not travel slowly dies; However, those who travel often die more quickly! Carl William Brown The use of traveling is to regulate imagination by reality, and instead of thinking how things may be, to see them as they are. Samuel Johnson Worth seeing? Yes; but not worth going to see. Samuel Johnson Much have I traveled in the realms of gold, and many goodly states and kingdoms seen. John Keats People commonly travel the world over to see rivers and mountains, new stars, garish birds, freak fish, grotesque breeds of human; they fall into an animal stupor that gapes at existence and they think they have seen something. Soren Kierkegaard If you look like your passport picture you're too ill to travel. Will Kommen The map is not the territory. Alfred Korzybski Thanks to the interstate highway system, it is now possible to travel across the country from coast to coast without seeing anything. Charles Kuralt Without stirring abroad, one can know the whole world; Without looking out of the window one can see the way of heaven. The further one goes the less one knows. Lao-Tzu After the end of humanity, some survivors travel the universe on a spaceship in search of a new planet on which to continue the development of stupidity. For eternity. Carl William Brown Comes over one an absolute necessity to move. And what is more, to move in some particular direction. A double necessity then: to get on the move, and to know whither. D. H. Lawrence We travelers are in very hard circumstances. If we say nothing but what has been said before us, we are dull and have observed nothing. If we tell anything new, we are laughed at as fabulous and romantic. Lady Mary Wortley Montagu The tourist who moves about to see and hear and open himself to all the influences of the places which condense centuries of human greatness is only a man in search of excellence. Max Lerner Does this boat go to Europe, France? Anita Loos Spirit of place! It is for this we travel, to surprise its subtlety; and where it is a strong and dominant angel, that place, seen once, abides entire in the memory with all its own accidents, its habits, its breath, its name. Alice Meynell If we are always arriving and departing, it is also true that we are eternally anchored. One's destination is never a place, but rather a new way of looking at things. Henry Miller Our organism is a perfect machine that travels for a certain period on the highway of the absurd, so nothing is more noble and heroic than that someone doesn't really like making this stupid journey and therefore tries to damage the vehicle. Carl William Brown A man should ever be ready booted to take his journey. Michel Eyquem De Montaigne Traveling is not just seeing the new; it is also leaving behind. Not just opening doors; also closing them behind you, never to return. But the place you have left forever is always there for you to see whenever you shut your eyes. Jan Myrdal Life, as the most ancient of all metaphors insists, is a journey; and the travel book, in its deceptive simulation of the journey's fits and starts, rehearses life's own fragmentation. More even than the novel, it embraces the contingency of things. Jonathan Raban As for pictures and museums, that don't trouble me. The worst of going abroad is that you've always got to look at things of that sort. To have to do it at home would be beyond a joke. Margaret Oliphant If my ship sails from sight, it doesn't mean my journey ends, it simply means the river bends. John Enoch Powell He who has not traveled widely thinks that his mother is the best cook. African Proverb In the middle ages people were tourists because of their religion, whereas now they are tourists because tourism is their religion. Robert Runcie Travel is the most private of pleasures. There is no greater bore than the travel bore. We do not in the least want to hear what he has seen in Hong Kong. Vita Sackville-West Its really hard to be roommates with people if your suitcases are much better than theirs. J. D. Salinger Life on board a pleasure steamer violates every moral and physical condition of healthy life except fresh air. It is a guzzling, lounging, gambling, dog's life. The only alternative to excitement is irritability. George Bernard Shaw Using a camera appeases the anxiety which the work-driven feel about not working when they are on vacation and supposed to be having fun. They have something to do that is like a friendly imitation of work: they can take pictures. Susan Sontag Journeys end in lovers meeting. William Shakespeare An involuntary return to the point of departure is, without doubt, the most disturbing of all journeys. Iain Sinclair A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it. John Steinbeck He travels best that knows when to return. Middleton for my part, I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel's sake. The great affair is to move. Robert Louis Stevenson It is better to travel hopefully than to arrive. Robert Louis Stevenson To travel hopefully is a better thing than to arrive, and the true success is to labor. Robert Louis Stevenson Travel is ninety percent anticipation and ten percent recollection. Edward Streeter A solitary traveler can sleep from state to state, from day to night, from day to day, in the long womb of its controlled interior. It is the cradle that never stops rocking after the lullaby is over. It is the biggest sleeping tablet in the world, and no one need ever swallow the pill, for it swallows them. Lisa St. Aubin De Teran Travelling is like flirting with life. It's like saying, "I would stay and love you, but I have to go; this is my station." Lisa St. Aubin De Teran I have been a stranger in a strange land. The Holy Bible Extensive traveling induces a feeling of encapsulation, and travel, so broadening at first, contracts the mind. Paul Theroux Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Mark Twain Travel is glamorous only in retrospect. Paul Theroux I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel's sake. The great affair is to move. Robert Louis Stevenson Inter-railers are the ambulatory equivalent of Macdonald's, walking testimony to the erosion of French culture. Alice Thompson Only the traveling is good which reveals to me the value of home and enables me to enjoy it better. Henry David Thoreau Man is flying too fast for a world that is round. Soon he will catch up with himself in a great rear end collision. James Thurber You perceive I generalize with intrepidity from single instances. It is the tourist's custom. Mark Twain Every year it takes less time to fly across the Atlantic and more time to drive to the office. Author Unknown If it's tourist season, why can't we kill them? Author Unknown Old men and far travelers may lie with authority. Author Unknown The alternative to a vacation is to stay home and tip every third person you see. Author Unknown The bigger the summer vacation the harder the fall. Author Unknown Those that say you can't take it with you never saw a car packed for a vacation trip. Author Unknown I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. Oscar Wilde I was disappointed in Niagara - most people must be disappointed in Niagara. Every American bride is taken there, and the sight of the stupendous waterfall must be one of the earliest, if not the keenest, disappointments in American married life. Oscar Wilde I think that wherever your journey takes you, there are new gods waiting there, with divine patience -- and laughter. Susan M. Watkins O public road, I say back I am not afraid to leave you, yet I love you, you express me better than I can express myself. Walt Whitman I traveled among unknown men, in lands beyond the sea; nor England! did I know till then what love I bore to thee. William Wordsworth Too often travel, instead of broadening the mind, merely lengthens the conversation. Elizabeth Drew The World is a book, and those who do not travel read only a page. St. Augustine When preparing to travel, lay out all your clothes and all your money. Then take half the clothes and twice the money. Susan Heller I think that travel comes from some deep urge to see the world, like the urge that brings up a worm in an Irish bog to see the moon when it is full. Lord Dunsany A good traveler has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving. Lao Tzu Wandering re-establishes the original harmony which once existed between man and the universe. Anatole France No one realizes how beautiful it is to travel until he comes home and rests his head on his old, familiar pillow. Lin Yutang Travel and change of place impart new vigor to the mind. Seneca The traveler was active; he went strenuously in search of people, of adventure, of experience. The tourist is passive; he expects interesting things to happen to him. He goes "sight-seeing." Daniel J. Boorstin It is not down in any map; true places never are. Herman Melville What you've done becomes the judge of what you're going to do - especially in other people's minds. When you're traveling, you are what you are right there and then. People don't have your past to hold against you. No yesterdays on the road. William Least Heat Moon, Blue Highways The whole object of travel is not to set foot on foreign land; it is at last to set foot on one's own country as a foreign land. G.K. Chesterton To get away from one's working environment is, in a sense, to get away from one's self; and this is often the chief advantage of travel and change. Charles Horton Cooley And that's the wonderful thing about family travel: it provides you with experiences that will remain locked forever in the scar tissue of your mind. Dave Barry Travelers never think that they are the foreigners. Read the full article

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2womenforme · 8 months

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the corbetts play many rapists pedophiles drug lords warmongers greedy people mass murderers bad politicians bad god play bad god play bad nature play n less good guys so they play both sides of the coin at the same time all over the place so they do not have biz saying we changed our opinion on something or added to it adjusted it and claim we are bad for it even though our adjustments are partly because of their bad behaviors directly and indirectly through some they play and convincing others to behave badly so we have to adjust our opinion on some topics

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hestiasroom · 1 year

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Dr. Jessica Taylor has always seemed off to me. I really used to gravitate toward some of her content, and agreed on her takes about the pathologizing of women's trauma in particular, but idk. You know when you get that feeling that beneath all of the bravado and confidence, someone is actually just a conspiracy theorist and a contrarian that basically just likes going against the grain? She gives me that sense. Like if it wasn't women and girls' trauma it would be some other topic that she would revel in being "against the grain" with. You can kind of see it with her COVID talk - which basically boils down to, "some UK politicians behaved very very badly and hypocritically, and lockdowns had negative consequences, and therefore all of the science behind covid, vaccines, and masks must all be false and it was actually just a plot for control, and the only people who are thinking critically are the people like me, and everyone who "followed the rules" just needs to have their "global awakening" (because apparently her point of view is the enlightened one, and the rest of us sheep are just waiting to evolve to her level)"? Yeah. It's not the "what" or the content of what she thinks (like, duh you have the right to question psychiatry, and covid policies etc. and would probably be better off if you did) but the how and why of it that makes me suspicious. It's the "maybe XYZ institution was wrong about ABC, therefore there was an intentional mastermind plot behind it all" narrative that gets to me and gives me pause. Again, I really, really, really agree with a massive majority of her takes on psychiatry in general. I don't think she's wrong. But nonetheless, I'm always trying to be critical not just of those I disagree with, but also with those I agree with, and she just never seems to pass the smell test for me. Who knows, I could be way off. But every time I come back to her, I really don't think I am off lol.

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47mel47 · 6 years

Video

youtube

Kindergarten Cop and the 45th Parliament of Australia

This might have been made a year ago, but it is still relevant and accurate af.

#auspol #australia #abc #kindergarten cop #politicians behaving badly

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lassieposting · 2 years

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I love the fan pack!

I was wondering what head canons you have for each of the Raze siblings?

Okay so, firstly these are shared with @thats-so-craven

The Family In General

Skug's maternal family are incredibly wealthy old money aristocrats. His great-grandfather was the younger son of an Anglo-Norman Duke, who came over with the Norman invasion and was given A Lot of land in what is now County Dublin. He and his siblings all grew up on the ancestral family estate. As prominent nobility, it's impossible to avoid mortals, so they - like a lot of wealthy sorcerer families hiding in plain sight - officially use a false name for the entire household. Skug's family uses the surname Sionnach (Fox).

Ónora - 29th April 1360

She's an Elemental with an inactive ambidexterity gene - she has no second discipline herself, but she can pass ambidexterity on to her children.

She's straight.

Deceased.

Ónora Is Not Quinlan:

She's one of four children - she has two brothers, Alacrity & Thane, and one sister, Estrilda. The other three have a different mother; Ónora is the daughter of her father's second wife. Ónora only becomes heiress to her father's lands and wealth when her brothers are killed in the early years of the war.

She's the absolute biggest Daddy's girl. He cannot say no to her.

She grows up with Corrival! Their family estates neighbour each other's, so they're playmates as children and stay close as they grow up. The oldest five children, especially Carver and Skulduggery, remember Corrival visiting often when they were small as a sort of uncle figure, but over the years Abrogate's jealousy drove a wedge between them and eventually he - Abrogate - put a stop to the friendship. He puts a stop to pretty much all her friendships, really.

Unlike Lardo's Quinlan, Ónora is not some swashbuckling adventurer. She's a noblewoman in 14th century Ireland. She's unusually well educated for her day, and she's quite remarkable in that she's a woman in a position of political power, but she's not a warrior, was never taught to fight, and very much behaves as is proper for a lady of her station to behave in that time period.

Her father establishes diplomatic ties between the reclusive sorcerer Communities in rural Ireland and the outcast/misfit mages living in mortal towns like Dublin. Ónora follows him into that line of work, serving as an ambassador of sorts, but as a woman she has to work a lot harder and do a lot more to be taken seriously as a competent politician. She helps write several important and influential treaties, including one which legalises the practice of necromancy in Ireland and negotiates religious freedoms for followers of obscure magical faiths. She meets Tenebrae during this period, basically doing the same job Solomon Wreath does in the 2000s.

She helps fund the initial Sanctuary effort, and she's later asked to serve as an Elder after one of the Council is killed. This is where she meets Abrogate, who's a sort of. Witcher-type at the time - an itinerant monster hunter for hire.

She has. Kind of a tragic life, really. She marries Abrogate during a period where the English are invading and taking land from Irish nobles, and she badly needs a husband because women are allowed to own land in their own right under Irish law but not under the law of the invaders, so she's facing losing her home. She likes him a lot, and thinks she could love him, but they marry far too quickly and she doesn't really know him that well when they become man and wife. At first, they live quite happily together. But when Carver is born, she has a very traumatic birth experience and suffers from pretty crippling PPD, which goes on to be the case in pretty much every pregnancy she has. Once Abrogate realises that having kids doesn't give him meaning in life, and neither does being married, their relationship very quickly goes downhill as he spirals into madness and violence and she spirals into depression and self-medication. She's a neglectful, kind of toxic mother, but she's very much the product of her circumstances and her suffering, which most of her children realise to varying extents.

Carver - 18th May 1573

He's primarily an Elemental. I haven't chosen his secondary discipline yet.

He's straight.

Alive

Childhood:

"Tadhg Sionnach" - Tadhg means "poet" in Irish; he's named after an ancestor of his mother's.

Heavily parentified from a very young age, he feels responsible for his siblings' care, safety, attitude and behaviour. He can be a bit nitpicky and overbearing, but he means well.

He's his mother's Emotional Support Eldest Son, which messes him up good. Their relationship is rife with covert emotional incest - she's not getting her emotional needs met by Abrogate (love, support, protection etc), so she turns to Carver and dumps those expectations on him instead. He's expected to defend her against his increasingly unstable, aggressive father, be there for her no matter how distant and uncaring she gets, never criticise her, and stay Mama's baby boy forever.

Quiet, people-pleasing, mature-for-his-age nerdy bookworm. Huge advocate of not rocking the boat.

500 Year War:

Officer in the Sanctuary's army - he buys a commission not long after his Surge.

Very by-the-book in his approach to military tactics; he's all about honour, fair-play and chivalry. He's born a bit late to be a knight, but he would've made a good one.

Will probably never forgive himself for leaving early-teens Skug to shoulder the brunt of the abuse to save his own skin

Maintains a relationship with his parents out of obligation for a lot longer than he's comfortable with

Corrival has him posted abroad for a lot of the conflict, which gives him space to actually develop a personality

Post-War:

Honorably discharged from the Sanctuary's forces after the war

Currently teaches History at the University of Roarhaven, the first educational establishment specifically for sorcerers. His courses are about magical history specifically, mostly the 500 Year War.

Has calmed down considerably and prefers to live at a slower pace. He's realised the world isn't going to end because he's five minutes late to a lecture.

Still a bookworm. Gets very enthusiastic about his subject. Generally well-liked by his students.

Used to offer correspondence courses for sorcerers before he was approached to teach on-campus.

2020+ has not been fun for him. He's only just figured out how to work the interactive whiteboard they installed like ten years ago. Zoom makes him want to kermit.

Very polite, very proper, a bit old-fashioned. Little old ladies love him.

Alt!Serpine is in his class. Carver hates him.

Skulduggery - 31 December 1578

Elemental/Necromancer

He's inherited a very watered-down form of Abrogate's Compelling Voice ability, which is why he used to be so good at inspiring his soldiers and why China says that you can't help but like him and want to fight alongside him. He has no idea he has this ability - he thinks he's just charismatic.

He's bi.

Alive...ish.

Childhood:

"Ruadhán Sionnach" - "Ruadhán" means "auburn-haired" or "red-haired". Carver named him, and he took it very seriously, so he got a nicer name than most of his siblings. His given name is basically "Little Red Fox".

He's. Arguably more challenging as a kid than he is as an adult. He's a) highkey love-starved and desperate for attention, b) an unmedicated ADHD nightmare child and c) unable to please his parents no matter what he does, so he's the most prone to acting out, breaking rules and just. Doing his own thing.

Designated family scapegoat from birth; Abrogate has doubts about Skug's paternity, and hardcore resents him for it

Like adult Skug, he's sweet at heart. He tolerates a lot of shit from his siblings without complaint, and he's the one who'll take responsibility for something he didn't do so a younger sib doesn't get caned. He lets Confelicity bully him into letting her dress him up for a lot longer than he's happy about.

500 Year War:

By the time he dies, he's a decorated General

Court-martialled so many times for doing stupid reckless shit oh my god. But the stupid reckless shit tends to work out for him and save lives, so he's never dishonorably discharged. Or shot. Much to Guild's dismay.

He's given his commission as a reward for leading the Forlorn Hope at the battle of Black Rock.

Unusually for an officer at this time, Skug enlists as a regular soldier (with Ghastly and Hopeless), and works his way up through the ranks rather than just buying an officer's commission. He leads from the front, doesn't ask his men to do anything he's not willing to do himself, and treats them like equals rather than inferiors. They're fiercely loyal as a result.

Talented, ruthless tactician & strategist.

Adores his wife. Adored by his wife. He does not know what the fuck he did to deserve her but he is so glad he did it.

Confelicity - 27 February 1582

She's a Sensitive primary, I haven't decided her secondary yet.

She's straight

Deceased

Childhood:

"Banbhán Sionnach" - "Banbhán" is a word for a small pig. ~3yo Skug gets to name her, and, as you can probably tell, he's not very happy about his new sister. Confelicity is a colicky, shrieking baby, and he doesn't like the noise, so she's named for the scream of a piglet.

Highkey spoiled, bratty and demanding. She's very much the Little Princess.

Her tantrums are colossal when she doesn't get her own way. The nursery maids are terrified of her, so they just give her whatever she wants.

She's basically Skug's first bully. Carver is quite a bit older, so when it's just the three of them, she'll scream and stomp her foot and throw things unless he lets her dress him up in pretty gowns and put ribbons in his curls, so they can have a ladies' tea together like Mother does in the parlour. Carver will sometimes intervene on his behalf, but the nursemaids expect him to put up with it to stave off a tantrum.

She's? Fiercely intelligent, and especially good with numbers. Managing household finances is part of her education as a lady, and she excels at math.

She's a daddy's girl - right up until she isn't. She's Abrogate's favourite while she's obeying his every order and parroting his commands at her brothers, but that goes right out of the window when she realises that he's intending to marry her off to someone she's never met in the name of personal social advancement. She elopes as a teenager with the first person who proposes to her, and that's the end of that special relationship.

500 Year War:

Adult Confelicity is a socialite and philanthropist with a string of ex-husbands as long as her arm, each of whom has more money, a better title or more land than the one before. Some of them died and some of them she divorced, so she's got kind of a scandalous reputation as a possible black widow.

Frenemies with China after Skug introduces them after China first leaves the cult. They're pretty catty to each other whenever they're not being catty about other people together, but as soon as ganging up on Skug is an option they're the dearest of companions.

She's put that math expertise to use and become incredibly wealthy; she talks her husbands into investing in this project or that company, and it usually pays off for her. She's a money launderer extraordinaire.

She has a few kids, all daughters. She's...not a great mother. Like, she loves her children, in her own way, and she's a lot better to them than her parents were to her, but she's dealt with her upbringing by becoming cold and distant and emotionally closed off, so she's not the most maternal. Her love is mostly in the form of making sure her daughters get all the opportunities she never did, and that they never need anyone for anything.

Controversially refuses to take sides in the war, and is very public about it. She funnels funds into both sides, keeping herself and her family safe by steadfastly remaining neutral. This pretty much napalms her relationships with most of her siblings, who are firmly Team Sanctuary.

This backfires on her badly in the end. She's discovered using her connections, blackmail she's gained from her lovers and money she's embezzled from the projects she funds to run an operation smuggling the families of high-ranking Sanctuary officials out of occupied territory, so nobody else ends up like Skugwife and Skugbab. Ultimately, she's executed by Mevolent's forces, and subsequently given a bravery honour by the Sanctuary.

Francis - 12 June 1584

He's an Elemental primary, secondary undecided.

He's bi but. Very conflicted about it, thanks to Abrogate

Deceased

Childhood:

His given name is a girl's name. I haven't decided which girl's name, but it's like. Painfully feminine. Think like, Annabelle, Evangeline, Rosalind level girly. Confelicity named him, and she very much wanted a sister, so she was super salty when he was born male. She decides that she's having a sister, whether he likes it or not.

He's sweeter, gentler and more sensitive than Skug and Carver, and Abrogate wastes no time in getting on his back about it. Francis doesn't like fencing lessons. Francis cries if he falls off his pony. Francis hides when his parents fight. He hears every variation of "why can't you be a real man", and he's constantly being compared to his brothers in a negative light. This, obviously, is not good for his emotional growth.

500 Year War:

He didn't ever really want to be a soldier? Adult Francis is a rake; his main interests as an adult are gambling, whoring and drinking. But at this point, he has two brothers in the military and he's under a lot of pressure not to let the side down, so he buys a commission because he feels like he has to.

He's? Kind of a mess, honestly. Skug and Corrival are constantly hauling his ass out of the fire - paying off his gambling debts, talking him out of duels, dragging him out of drinking dens when he's so wasted he can't see straight.

He has a complicated relationship with his brothers - he simultaneously aches to be just like them and make them proud and be praised by them, and resents them for setting a standard he doesn't think he'll ever be able to meet. He's always very sorry for his bad behaviour, but he never manages to stop.

Essentially he's a lost kid who doesn't have the skills he needs to deal with his childhood trauma. He's also funny and theatrical and overly generous. He just can't quite get past his destructive coping mechanisms.

He does okay until Skug dies. And then he's left alone with nobody to wrangle him or intimidate people he's on the wrong side of into backing down. He's killed in a duel in the early 1700s.

Petulance - 14 October 1588

She's an Energy Thrower, secondary undecided. She's very much about anger and explosions and fucking shit up, though.

Deceased - but she lasts longer than most

Childhood:

"Peaches Sionnach" - she's named by baby Francis, and he just? Really loves peaches at the time.

She's Skug's favourite sibling by far, and she idolises him. She's six when he runs away, and she's the only one he leaves a note for.

Very much a 17th century tomboy. She's far too impatient to enjoy needlepoint or taking a turn about the gardens - she always wants to be riding or climbing or running through mud. Her mother absolutely despairs of her, and Confelicity very much sees her as the complete opposite of the sister she always wanted.

She doesn't do anything slowly. She's quick to anger, but quick to forgive. Quick to decide a new hobby is her entire life now, and quick to lose interest in that hobby. Quick to snap when she's in a temper, but quick to apologise once she's calmed down. She's just kind of? A tempest of a person, really.

She runs away from home when she's in her early teens, rides to Dublin alone, and just sort of. Shows up at Skug's barracks announcing that she'll be moving in, he doesn't get a say, she's not going home. She knows he's incapable of saying no to her. They make it work though - like him, she's not afraid to pitch in and get her hands dirty, so she makes herself useful and earns her keep fetching and carrying for the soldiers, helping clean firearms, running messages around.

500 Year War:

She's never officially a soldier, but her magic is combat-based and she's involved in several defensive battles, when Mevolent's forces attack a Sanctuary encampment.

For all that her name is kind of. Edgelordy and gothic, she's actually sort of aggressively positive. Highly practical. She doesn't waste her time with what ifs or could've beens; this is the world she's got, the life she's living, and she'll figure out a way to make the best of it. She's stubborn and bullheaded to a fault, and she is Not going to end up like Francis.

She's a fucking nightmare when Skug meets Wifey. She's that sister who's like, cringily obvious about your crush, smirking and making pointed comments about how maybe you should walk her home, Skulduggery and how you two look perfectly adorable together. She likes Wifey a lot, and she's determined to push them together.

Post-War:

She finally gets married either during or after World War I - technically, sorcerers aren't supposed to get involved in mortal affairs, but she thinks that's bullshit in the case of such massive events, so she signs up as a mechanic with the British Army while all the men are fighting. Her husband is a mortal fighter pilot, and they have a son together.

She's killed in the Blitz of World War II when her son is three, just a year after her husband's plane is shot down in a dogfight.

Uther - 30 November 1595

Disciplines undecided.

He's straight.

Alive.

Childhood:

He's born the year Skug runs away, which is quite a shock to Ónora, and she clings to Uther as a result.

He's in the unfortunate position of being the oldest child still living at home. Carver is stationed abroad, so even letters from him are few and far between. Skug has run away and not spoken to anyone in the family since. Confelicity got married and cut her parents off. Petulance runs away when Uther is fairly young, and Ónora is left with none of her eldest children to serve as her emotional support animal.

Yeah, Uther is the Emotional Support Child v2.0.

His role in the family is the same as Carver's was years ago. Listen to, validate and protect his mother, to his own detriment. Raise his siblings and keep them in line so their behaviour doesn't fray her nerves. Listen to her rants about how badly her older children are treating her. He's all she has, her perfect son, what would she ever do without him?

Like Carver, he takes this duty seriously. Unlike Carver, he likes it. He feels mature and important and loved, and he's incredibly enmeshed with his mother.

To the twins, Apricity and baby Respair, he's sort of. He does love them. He wants them to be happy and safe. But he sees them as his responsibility to raise and discipline, so he tends to be a bit overbearing and controlling and critical. He likes to flex his authority over them.

When Ónora is killed, Uther takes it hardest. He'd already learned to hate his older siblings through years of listening to his mother vent about them abandoning her, but having to go live with Skug really compounds it. He blames Skug for not being there - if the Family Scapegoat had never left home, Abrogate would've had someone to beat up on, and his mother would still be alive. He hates that he's gone from being treated like a miniature adult to being treated like a preteen boy, and that his authority over his siblings is revoked. He hates how Skug grieves, and that Skug doesn't remember their mother with the same adoration that he does, and that this brother who didn't even stay around to meet him as a baby now gets to run his life. They clash hard, and Uther hates Skug from the get-go.

As soon as he's old enough, he leaves home and cuts the rest of the family off. He never meets Skugbab, or any of his other siblings' children.

500 Year War:

I haven't thought too much yet about what he does during the war.

He's a draft-dodger though; there's a phase after Skug and the other generals are killed where the Sanctuary is desperate enough to conscript, and Uther is having none of that. He wants nothing to do with being in the firing line.

Now:

He's a math teacher. In Handbook canon, the kiddie school still exists, but it's not Bargain Bin Hogwarts. It's a regular school, teaching ordinary subjects, with a magical twist. So like, history class includes both mortal and magical history. Basic sigils are offered as an optional language alongside beginner's French, German and Spanish. That kind of thing.

Bayard - 22 August 1597

Honestly I haven't focused much on Bayard yet. His magic is something in the Ergokinesis family - not a traditional Energy Thrower, but something related.

He's straight.

Deceased.

What I Have So Far:

Honestly I haven't focused much on Bayard yet. His magic is something in the Ergokinesis family - not a traditional Energy Thrower, but something related. Maybe a Juggernaut - someone who stores kinetic energy and, rather than throwing it, channels it through an object. In Bayard's case, this would be his beloved warhammer, a two-handed weapon the size of a short adult - even before adding bonus magic damage, if he hits you with that thing, you will feel it.

He's the older twin, and he's very protective of Sophrosyne.

He's? Not easily flustered. Not much really bothers him. He's rarely found a problem he can't solve by hitting it really, really hard.

It's pretty easy to assume Bayard is stupid and honestly, compared to the likes of Sophrosyne and Skug, he'd agree that he is. He's a simple man, he enjoys a simple life, and he's never been one for academics or overthinking things. But he's got A Lot of common sense.

Sophrosyne - 22 August 1597

She's an incredibly powerful multi-branch Sensitive. She doesn't just have very vivid premonitions, she actively has to tune out everyone's thoughts. She hates it.

She's a lesbian.

Deceased.

Life:

She's the younger twin.

Probably the most intellectual sibling. In addition to English and Irish, she speaks Latin, Greek, Spanish and Italian. She styled herself after Sappho, her favourite poet, at the age of...somewhere between 11-13. She plays the harp, the lyre and the harpsichord, creates beautiful embroidery, and writes professionally.

She publishes several books of poetry (under a pseudonym, because she's female in an era when that would affect her readership). A decent chunk of her poetry is somewhat melancholic and tends to focus on like, the fleeting nature of life and dreams and longing. The rest of it is...really, really gay. Meeting China around the time she hits puberty is. Something of a formative experience.

Unfortunately for her, her magic is more of a disability than a gift. She begins having visions from about the age of four, and from that point, she spends the rest of her life in delicate health. The visions she has are vivid, all-consuming and deeply distressing to a gentle soul, and because her magic is so powerful, she's like a dinner bell for malicious entities looking to possess a body, so she has to fight off attempts to take her over. She's often indisposed/bedridden, becomes exhausted easily, frequently faints after a vision and experiences chronic pain left over from previous psychic battles.

When she's feeling well, she likes to get involved with a local charity hospital for mortal peasants.

This is ultimately her downfall. When Mevolent weaponises liquefactive necrosis, mortals start presenting at the hospital with unexplainable plague symptoms. And like, this is only a few hundred years after the Black Death. Sorcerers of Sophrosyne's generation would absolutely have been told stories by their parents, who lived through it. She knows what plague can do to mortals. As a sorcerer, she's supposed to be immune to mortal illnesses, so she volunteers to take care of the infected patients to protect the doctors. But it's not a mortal illness, and when she contracts it, there's still no cure. She dies young.

Apricity - 27 March 1599

She's an Arborkinetic - her magic is all about plants. She talks to her plants, she makes them grow, she can use them defensively if she has to, and she has a few plant-based adaptive abilities.

She also inherited a subconscious ability from Abrogate - hers is...what you might call luck. While she believes life is good and things will work out for the best, they tend to do so - she gently nudges the world in the direction she wants it to go, without even realising she's doing it. But that can backfire.

She's straight.

Deceased.

Childhood:

"Dolly Sionnach" - technically the twins both get to name her, but they're 1, and they also refuse to compromise, so Uther (3) takes over. She's named after a toy baby doll, because that's what he thinks she looks like.

She's basically Wifey's mini-me. She's about seven when she's orphaned and taken to live with Skug, and a few years older when Skug marries Wifey. Once she's got that stability, she thrives. Wifey is very maternal and very much wants to be a mother figure to these poor traumatised children, and Apricity is a child who badly wants a loving mother.

She's a bit eccentric, as a child. Wifey has a lovingly-tended garden, and Apricity will sit out there for hours talking to the rose bushes. She's highly imaginative and prefers playing alone to playing with other children.

Wifey instills a deep love of crafty pursuits in her. They cook together, bake together, repurpose old gowns together, make quilts together, all that sort of thing.

500 Year War:

She has zero interest in ever getting involved in the war in any capacity. Like, absolutely nothing about Apricity is combat-worthy at all, she's a super gentle soul.

She marries, and dedicates herself to growing and selling flowers. She gets lucky; the tulip boom happens while she's still a young adult, and it makes her a very wealthy woman.

She really wants children, but she has a hard time conceiving any. Like most of her siblings, she got the same magical ambidexterity gene combination as Skug, which affects fertility. It's upsetting for her, of course, but she mostly stays upbeat about it - she's young, and she has a very, very long life to become a mother.

But then Wifey and Skugbab are killed, and the brother who raised her is butchered for sport and burned on a spike. She loses a huge chunk of her family in one go, and she sinks into a deep depression which. Pretty much brings her entire life down around her ears. She's not happy-go-lucky anymore. She's not optimistic and she doesn't feel like everything will work out for the best. So. Her luck basically turns on her. Because she thinks everything is going to go to shit, that's the way she nudges the world, and then when bad things happen, they just make her feel worse.

She dies in childbirth in the 1700s.

Respair - 3 July 1602

He's an Elemental.

He inherited a watered-down form of invulnerability from Abrogate. It's a bit harder to injure him, he heals injuries faster, and he can tolerate more pain than most people. He believes this is his second discipline, some form of Vitakinesis - "We're all a bit magically ambidextrous in this family." This is really useful as a soldier. It's less useful in...other situations.

He's heteroflexible.

Alive. Technically.

Childhood:

"Báb Sionnach" - "Báb" means baby. His given name is literally "baby". He's named by three-year-old Apricity, and she is VERY!!! EXCITED!!! ABOUT THE NEW BABY!!!

He barely remembers his real parents. He knows that Skug is biologically his brother, and Wifey his sister-in-law, but they're the only parental figures he's ever known.

Because he was so young when his mother was killed, and he wasn't raised with her dysfunction and Abrogate's abuse, Respair escapes pretty much all the psychological trauma inflicted on his older siblings. He's a healthy, happy, normal kid.

He always aspires to be like Skug, from a very young age. He's an athletic, sporty boy, so he enjoys learning to fight and fence and playing soldiers with the neighbourhood boys.

He grows up into a very good-natured, cheerful, gentlemanly young man. He tends to take things on the chin and just sort of. Make it up as he goes along. He's a lot like Carver personality-wise, but he's more independent and less anxious, a lot more secure in himself.

500 Year War:

He signs up with the Sanctuary as soon as Skug lets him. It's not exactly what he expected - he doesn't get put in Skug's unit, and he's not immediately amazing at all things military - but he does enjoy it and he's generally a promising young soldier.

When Skug and Wifey are captured, the Sanctuary hesitates in its official response, so the people who love them - Carver if he's in the country, Ghastly, Hopeless, Bayard, Respair - mount an unofficial rescue mission. They don't know that Wifey and Skugbab are already dead.

They make it all the way into Serpine's castle, but they trip an alarm sigil and they're forced to flee without Skug. As they're trying to make their escape, Respair falls behind trying to get an opportunity for a killing shot against Serpine, and he's captured.

Serpine is busy with Skug, the object of his obsession, and he doesn't know who Respair is or that they're related. He's just a random young soldier. So he's thrown into the dungeon for now.

Officially, he's Missing Presumed Dead, and Carver never forgives himself for getting their baby brother killed.

Now:

Pretty much everyone thinks Respair is dead - including Serpine, who - when he remembered Respair existed after Skug was burned - found his cell empty, and was told that in the meantime, the boy had died of his injuries and the body had been disposed of.

He's not.

Valkyrie has even seen him. She just didn't realise at the time.

"They were in a warehouse of some sort...Dead people, in various stages of dissection, hung from the walls on hooks and large iron nails. They looked at her as she passed, but made no sound." - Valkyrie, Mortal Coil

"No one will know you never left. I can hide you among the corpses here. You'll never be found. I'll tell the Dullahan, and I'll even tell the banshee if she comes to investigate, that I waved goodbye and watched you leave. Who knows what could have happened to you after that?" - Nye, Mortal Coil

#skulduggery pleasant #the skugfam #sp headcanons #sp handbook #long post #INCREDIBLY long post yall #im sorry this took so long but look how much content there is #the 10 images limit is a PITA #anyway yeah turns out the handbook is actually angstier than canon

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thetomorrowshow · 2 years

Text

poisoned rats in a pot of grain - ch. 3

Masterlist - Previous - Next

i know i've been complaining about my finals for like weeks but they r almost done!! i go home on friday :)

cw: oh boy, blood, dehumanization, sexual harassment (in the form of jokes), abuse, injuries

Xornoth scratches at his scalp and Jimmy pushes into the touch a little bit, letting his eyes fall closed. Something’s happening today. There’s been a strange tension coming off Xornoth, one that makes him uneasy. There’s nothing he can do about it, though.

Xornoth’s been preparing for something. He only knows because of two reasons: one, he’s been measured for clothes. He hasn’t had clothes in . . . so long. He would love to have clothes again.

The other reason is that they’ve been training him how to fight with a knife, rewarding him with head pats when he does well and punishing him with a whip when he fails. He’s getting decent at throwing it, hitting the target more often than not. He’s just not sure why he’s being given weapons and properly taught how to use them. It’s got to mean something, right?

It hurts his head to think about, so he lets it go, focusing more intently on Xornoth’s touch. He daydreams for a little bit about clothes and warmth in his cell. He hopes it’s something nice.

A door to his left swings open and jolts Jimmy from his thoughts. He buries his face in Xornoth’s knee. He doesn’t want to be taken away yet. It’s so much warmer here, he doesn’t have to think here, he can just exist and—

“Sir, they’re here.”

“Both of them?”

“Yes sir. Both at once or one at a time?”

Xornoth’s hand grips Jimmy’s hair a bit tighter. He breathes through it. “Both. Send them in here in five minutes.”

The door closes again, and Xornoth eases Jimmy off their knee, bending down to shift his collar a bit. “Now, pet, I will be stepping out. You can behave, can’t you?”

Jimmy nods. He’s very good at behaving, has spent a lot of time in this room all alone. Xornoth frowns, slaps him hard enough Jimmy’s head jerks to the side. “Answer me.”

“Y-yes, master. I can be—I can be good,” he stutters hoarsely, resolutely ignoring his stinging cheek. Xornoth grants him a smile, one that tells Jimmy he hasn’t messed up too much.

“There are guests coming, darling. I need you to not disobey me tonight, all right?”

Tonight. It’s nighttime. His internal clock had been so certain it was midmorning.

Wait. Guests?

“All right?” Xornoth prompts, and Jimmy nods again before remembering—

“Yes, master.”

Xornoth pats his cheek, right where they just slapped him. “Good boy. I’ll be back.” Then they’re gone with a sweep of their cloak, the right-side door shutting behind them.

Then Jimmy’s alone in the room. He takes a moment to stretch, readjust his position so that he won’t cramp up too badly. Guests. They’ve never had guests before.

Dread pools in the pit of his stomach. Is he going to be expected to perform? Will he have to roll over, or bark, or chase his own tail?

I won’t do it, he tells himself firmly. I’m not a dog, I don’t do tricks.

He will do it, if Xornoth tells him to. He pretends like he won’t, but he knows that one word from Xornoth and he’ll be tripping over himself to obey.

You’re a pet. You’re a pet. You’re a pet.

He says it to himself over and over again. He has to believe it to survive.

The door opens, and Jimmy glances and then looks again, because he knows that face. That there is one of the top billionaires of the country, not powered in a superpowers-way but in a way more powerful than anyone in the city, currently funding a trip to space and has every politician in the area in his pocket: Joey Graceffa in a clean-cut suit, hair as perfect as the world before Jimmy was born. Joey doesn’t seem to notice Jimmy at first, but the eyes of the person behind him immediately land on him, and that’s somehow another person Jimmy recognizes.

Mythics gazes down at him, red-and-black medieval-themed costume shining, something curious in his eyes. He recognizes Jimmy, that’s for sure. Jimmy shifts under his gaze, back of his neck prickling uncomfortably. He doesn’t like the grin curling across the villain’s face.

Mythics nudges Joey, points at Jimmy. Now both of them are openly staring at him, not even looking up to follow the lackey leading them to their seats, both two seats down from Xornoth’s place on opposite sides of the table. They settle in their seats, whisper to each other for a moment, before Mythics calls to him.

“Hey, Solidarity! This where you been, then?”

“Xornoth’s little sub,” Joey croons, and Jimmy can feel his face flushing red. Do they not know he was kidnapped? But they only laugh at his reaction, Joey leaning back in his chair. “Are you allowed to talk to us, or is that against Xornoth’s rules?”

Jimmy . . . he’s not sure. He glances uncertainly at the door Xornoth had exited through. Xornoth hadn’t told him he couldn’t, but they also hadn’t said it was okay. Jimmy doesn’t want to talk, though. He has, at least, autonomy when it comes to people outside of Xornoth giving him commands. He hates talking, anyway. He hates the sound of his own voice.

They tease him a little bit when he doesn’t respond, but quickly grow bored and turn to each other. They discuss something that Jimmy doesn’t quite process, stuff about Joey’s business, recent fights that Mythics has been in. They mention Major and for a second Jimmy tunes in, but they move on quickly to a new threat in the city who has something to do with water powers and Jimmy struggles to follow so he quits trying. After about twenty minutes, they seem to have exhausted all common subjects and fall silent, scanning the room in boredom.

Jimmy shifts as quietly as he can, holding his ankle chain still to stop it from clanking. His knees are sore, feet pressing weirdly into the floor, and he doesn’t want to remain in that position but he also doesn’t want to draw their attention. For all his care, Mythics’s eyes catch on him immediately, simply observing as he readjusts. He doesn’t look away, even after Jimmy breaks their brief eye contact. He just watches, watches silently while Joey Graceffa sighs and taps his fingers on the dark oak table and stares up at the chandelier.

Jimmy glances at the door again. When is Xornoth coming back?

It’s another ten minutes before the villain strides through the door, his cloak billowing behind him. Both Joey Graceffa and Mythics stand hurriedly, their chairs squeaking, and Joey’s face lights up with something—something like admiration? Infatuation? Desire?

Whatever it is, Jimmy doesn’t like it. Xornoth doesn’t need anyone, doesn’t want anyone. They’ve already got Jimmy.

Xornoth nods to the both of them, takes their seat as the other two sit as well. Jimmy scoots a bit closer to Xornoth, keeping his eyes on the floor. After a moment, Xornoth grabs his head and pulls it onto their lap, keeping him there. He lets his eyes fall closed, forces his body to relax. He knows how to do this. He’s good at this.

There’s silence for a long while, and Jimmy hazards a look up. In his new position, he can’t see above the table, but he can see that from underneath, Mythics is kicking his legs and Joey’s knee is bouncing. Xornoth is orchestrating this silence, not either of them.

“So, Xorny, what do you want us here for?” Joey asks eventually. Another long moment.

“Straight to business, Graceffa?” Their tone is light, but by the way their fingers curl around Jimmy’s hair, he knows they’re more anxious than they’re letting out. Joey lets out a trilling giggle.

“Oh, I don’t mind a little foreplay, if that’s what you’d prefer," he says, his chair creaking. "Should we start with your little sex slave?"

Jimmy gasps as Xornoth suddenly drags him back, almost up to their waist, both arms around him possessively. A few strands of his hair come loose and all he can do is hope he's not bleeding. Xornoth hates it when he gets blood on them.

"You can look at my pet," Xornoth says, voice deceptively calm for how tightly they're holding Jimmy's hair, "but you may not touch. Am I clear?"

"Oh yeah. Yup. Crystal clear!" Mythics stammers.

"Oh, of course!" adds Joey. "He is very pretty, though—you must have trained him yourself, what with his obedience."

Xornoth chuckles, but his grasp on Jimmy doesn't loosen. "Quite. The most useful aid was the cage, for certain."

Jimmy shudders, face pressed into Xornoth's thigh. He hears the table creak under someone leaning forward.

"Ooh, I just love cages," Joey says. "Could we, maybe. . . ?"

"I don't see why not," Xornoth replies, nudging Jimmy off and standing, unwrapping the chain-link leash from the arm of the chair. "Pet, how about we show our guests your little cage?"

The blood drains from his face. No. No. He can't—he can't go back into that room, his mind had broken there, he'd lost all concept of himself beyond a hollowed-out shell and if he went in again he wouldn't ever return to himself—

Xornoth tugs on the leash and Jimmy can't help but whine a little, turning wide, pleading eyes up on his master. He thought he'd been good, he'd done everything he was supposed to, he hadn't even thought about escape—

A peal of laughter comes from across the table, where the other two are standing. Xornoth raises a brow at Jimmy, as if to ask if he's really going to misbehave now.

"You won't be going in it, pet," Xornoth tells him, pulling him to his feet by the leash. "Not if you behave."

"Ooh, will he crawl?" Joey asks, and Xornoth briefly glances at the billionaire before turning back to Jimmy.

"Well, pet?"

It's not really a question. It's a reminder, a reminder that Jimmy's been told to behave for their guests. He swallows, feels his brain shift with a clunk into survival mode. He drops, slowly, to his knees, even as Xornoth reaches down and unlocks the cuff around his ankle.

He stares for a moment at the cuffs still binding his wrists to each other, the chain connecting them too short to allow for proper movement. But then Xornoth is yanking at his leash and he has to try, has to scoot along, using his hands as one to pull himself forward. It’s humiliating, but he doesn’t have a choice. He can’t go in the cage. He can’t disobey his master.

His awkward, hobbling crawl is slow-going and painful on his bad hip, but Xornoth is patient and barely even chokes him when pulling on the leash. He just has to get to the room. If he gets to the ballroom, he won’t have to do any more crawling.

His knees are about to give out by the time they get there, but he manages to crawl into the room before rocking back onto his tailbone, stretching his legs as much as he dares.

The two guests are already across the room, checking out the cage, the one that Jimmy won’t look directly at because his heart jumps at just the sight of it, but then Joey’s asking if they can put Jimmy in it and he just—

“I’m sure your imagination can suffice,” Xornoth says, gesturing down toward where Jimmy is shaking with fear, a low whine accompanying every breath, and he would feel ashamed if he weren’t so grateful that he’s not going in there.

They exchange some more words that Jimmy doesn’t hear over the blood rushing in his ears, and something happens—something he doesn’t process—something he doesn’t remember—but the next thing he knows he’s back beside the table, ankle cuffed to the ring in the floor, head on Xornoth’s leg.

His knees are bleeding. They’re scraped up and twingeing, and there’s something trickling down from his burning nose and he’s not sure why.

Jimmy finds he doesn’t care. He swipes at it with the back of his hand, stares at the blood there.

“Don’t get blood on my clothes, puppy,” Xornoth murmurs, and Jimmy mechanically tilts his head back. After a moment, blood runs down the back of his throat. He hates the taste, but doesn’t move. He thinks he ought to be worried by the lost time, but he just can’t bring himself to care.

He tunes into the conversation going on over his head—it’s something about advertising and henchmen and taking over the city, normal villain stuff.

“But how will we get the heroes out of the way?” Mythics asks. “Major’s been especially obnoxious lately, and he always wins.”

Xornoth is excited, Jimmy can tell. He can tell in the way they rub his strands of hair between their fingertips, the way their foot taps. “That is where my little bird comes in,” they announce, and something sinks in Jimmy’s stomach that is decidedly not blood. “Surely you’ve both noticed the excess of disasters in the city as of late?”

“Why, Xorny! You don’t mean to tell me that—”

“And soon, he will be brought into the light.” Xornoth’s hand leaves Jimmy as they lean forward, resting their arms on the table. “Soon, the world will know the devastating effects of Xornoth and his Canary. With my control of my pet, I will rule.”

It’s the Mad King against Xornoth, and the Mad King is losing. For the first time ever, Xornoth is not working alone. With them, in a gaudy yellow costume with feathered glider wings, is an unknown villain, newly dubbed the Canary.

This villain hasn’t done anything yet, is a complete wild card, is simply watching from the skyscraper windowsill that a tentacle had lifted him to at the beginning of the battle.

The Mad King is scaling the wall up to the Canary, shooting his grappling hook up to each ledge and swinging himself up bit by bit. He seems to have abandoned Xornoth for the moment, turning instead on a hopefully easier opponent.

The Canary watches him passively. Various news cameras zoom in, trying to tell if this is a new villain entirely or an old one rebranded. A tentacle shoots up to the Mad King—as soon as it touches him it writhes and collapses—the Canary is looking across the wave of cops to where Xornoth still stands in the middle of the street—Xornoth nods.

The ledge under the Mad King’s fingers cracks.

Then that side of the building caves in entirely.

The Mad King slips, falls, is falling and falling and falling—

The tentacle that had collapsed surges up and catches him and the watching crowd lets out a gasp of relief, then another of surprise as the Canary spreads his wings and shoves off the side of the building, glider catching the wind and carrying him down to the ground beside Xornoth. The villain grabs him by the back of his neck, and live cameras catch briefly that they’re holding him by something around the Canary’s neck—and then the cameras fizzle out and one of them explodes.

The tentacle carrying the Mad King down suddenly releases him and slithers into the ground, leaving him to fall the last twenty-or-so feet to the asphalt with a resounding thud. Attention turns to him, cries of concern making themselves heard, and by the time anyone looks back to the two villains they’re gone.

The Mad King is already sitting up by the time the ambulance gets through the crowd, waving off the paramedics that try to make him lie back down. He limps away into an alley, and from there into another alley, and from there into a waiting-for-demolition apartment building that has a dumbwaiter in the wall of the laundry room, which he sits in before lowering it.

“When I said I needed someone to fight them, I didn’t mean you!”

He stumbles out of the dumbwaiter only to be hugged fiercely by the villain with pink hair, the one who rose from the depths of the ocean. He hugs her back, grimacing slightly.

“Easy on the ribs, will ya? That thing dropped me from, like, a hundred feet up.”

She releases him, concern lining her face. She pats him all over, watching for when he hisses in pain. He pushes her away after a few moments of basking in the attention, staggers to the card table set up in the middle of the basement where they’ve laid disinfectant and bandages. He lets his cape fall to the ground, loosens the laces on the back of his costume and rolls down the top half. His bare chest is discolored along one side, red and turning purple. The villain blushes, looks away.

“Did you get what you needed?” he asks, dabbing bruise cream along the swath of bruises with a sucked-in breath.

She nods, then elaborates when she realizes he isn’t looking at her. “It’s him,” she says confidently. “I’m sure it’s him. I mean, I was pretty sure before, but now that I’ve seen him. . . .”

The Mad King shakes his head a little, clicking his tongue. “Never thought Solidarity would go in like that with Xornoth, of all people. Like, Xornoth—that guy’s evil, but Solidarity’s always been very down-to-earth.”

She doesn’t say anything, not until the cloth that the Mad King is using to rub disinfectant on the scrapes on his shoulder falls from his fumbling fingers. She sighs, hurries forward. “Joel. . . .”

“I’m fine,” he says through gritted teeth. “I’m just—I’m tired. Are you going to be using the bed?” He gestures to the corner of the dimly-lit basement, where there’s a mattress on the floor with a couple of pillows and blankets piled on it. She shakes her head, pushes him into the folding chair there, picks up the cloth. It’s quiet then, the only sound Joel’s hissed breaths and her whispered apologies. When she’s done, his chest wrapped up tightly in case of broken ribs, she helps him stand. Impulsively, he wraps her in a hug. She freezes for a moment, long enough that he starts to pull away, then she hugs him back. They stand there, silent, arms around each other, faces pressed into each other’s shoulders.

“I’mma go sleep now,” Joel murmurs, and she hums and rubs his back for a moment before stepping away.

“Rest, then,” she says, sweeping the first-aid supplies off the table and into a duffel bag. Below them is a stack of papers, a laptop, and a map of the city marked in red. “We’ve got a lot to do to find him.”

#esmp #empires smp #jimmy solidarity #empires fanfic #empires superpowers au #esh au #mas writes #somebody on ao3 got really excited abt the idea of joey being like a sugar daddy for xornoth #and i'm here to tell you that it's true #billionaire joey graceffa is here to make dirty jokes and shower xornoth in cash #ooo mythics is working with xornoth ooo wonder what that means??#what are joel's powers??#well joel's powers aren't exactly a secret it just hasn't come up yet #any guesses?#anyways let me know what y'all think!#love you guys

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