#pub crowley is an excellent crowley

[parttimesarah]

Tonight’s GIF(t)s feature Pub Crowley…

[greenthena]

The Eldritch Ball or Aziraphale's Macabre Danse

I'm a huge sucker for dark classical music (I'm using the term "classical" broadly, not referring to the specific period. Music-y folks, please forgive.) As such, Saint-Saëns's "Danse Macabre" is one of my all time favorite pieces. It's spooky. It's intentionally dissonant. It's even got a jump scare! Like, literally, the perfect piece of music.

The story behind "Danse Macabre" goes like this: Each Halloween at midnight, Death enters the graveyard with a fiddle. As he plays, the skeletons rise from the ground and dance through the cemetery, resurrected by Death's power and possessed by his instrument.

In S2 E3, the Bentley plays "Danse Macabre" as Aziraphale drives up to Edinburgh. "What do we do? We play classical music that stays classical music." (And the Bentley listens to him! Because the Bentley is an expression of Crowley's subconscious and wants to please him and make him happy...and I'm sure you can find lots of excellent metas to that end. Or maybe you have another theory about why the Bentley is so pliant toward the angel? I'd love to hear it. But that's not what I'm talking about right now. I'm just getting distracted.)

Why is this song so perfect for a bit of subtle foreshadowing and repeated metaphor? So glad you asked. I have reasons. And evidence. Please, peruse my wares.

In the A Plot of this episode, Aziraphale travels to Scotland to visit a pub called The Resurrectionist. (Ya know, like Death? Like how Death resurrects people in the song? Okay, just wanted to really hit that nail into the coffin.) The pub is, of course, named for a certain Mr. (not Dr., he's a surgeon) Dalrymple, whom Crowley and Aziraphale meet in the accompanying flashback minisode entitled (you'll never guess) "The Resurrectionist." The minisode plot involves Crowley and his the angel encountering young Elspeth, a grave robber who, like Death, releases the bodies of the deceased from their earthly bonds of soil and stone. My interpretation is that Elspeth becomes Death incarnate, first in the process of using her instrument (her shovel) to resurrect the dead, and later when she inadvertently brings about the literal death of her partner, Wee Morag. Rather than allow Wee Morag's body to turn to dust in the ground, Elspeth "resurrects" her, selling her body to Dr. Dalrymple (sorry, Mr. Dalrymple, he's a surgeon, not a doctor), who will use Wee Morag's body for research, which will in turn save the lives of countless others by furthering the field of medicine. A form of resurrection, indeed. There's also the plot thread of Crowley and Aziraphale providing Elspeth with a nest egg to escape the cycle of poverty into which she has been born. This, too, is another form of re-birth. Or, say it with me, resurrection. Alright, you're getting it now.

Okay, now I get to delve into the fun stuff. Let's talk about that cotillion ball, shall we? You know, that danse party where Aziraphale persuades all the shopkeepers on Whickber street to attend a Jane Austen-style ball?

I personally refer to this whole fiasco experience as the Eldritch Ball. On the surface, it seems fairly innocent. The shopkeepers need a little bit of encouragement to attend the Whickber Street monthly meeting, but the angel manages to convince everyone to join with the help of some coercion-via-bribery. When they show up, they're transmuted into Austen-esque characters, from their clothes, to their speech patterns, even to some extent, their perception of reality. This is where it starts to get a little uncomfortable if you peel back the layers. Mrs. Sandwich can't talk about what she does for a living, which is a great comedy bit, but also demonstrates that her speech is being significantly censored and altered by an outside force. With the exception of Mr. Brown (hidden agendas here, Neil? I honestly don't know), all the shopkeepers find themselves in new, slightly-period-appropriate garments. What's really weird, though, is that no one notices the changes. When the dancing begins, to the music of Mr. Anderson's piano and an accompanying string quartet (strings...as in violins...as in fiddles. Remember Death's fiddle?), Nina appears to be the only one who realizes that something is off.

Maggie: This is something new.

Nina: This is something completely bonkers. Are we...? Why is everyone talking like they've escaped from Pride and Prejudice?

Maggie: Just getting into the spirit of things, I suppose.

Nina: The spirit of what things? This is meant to be the shopkeeper association monthly meeting.

Maggie: Hmm. Yes. Now that you put it like that...

Nina: Are we dancing?

Maggie: Yes.

Nina: Did you ever learn the steps to this dance?

Maggie: It's just what we do, isn't it?

Nina: No. No, it isn't. This is something mad. This is their [Crowley & Azirapahle's] fault. They're doing this.

Something is definitely mad. One might even say it's macabre. Aziraphale has become Death the Resurrectionist. He has lured the shopkeepers of Whickber Street through a portal (as Death leads his flock from the world of the dead to the world of the living.) Aziraphale's instrument is his clipboard and pen, held almost as one might hold a fiddle and bow, as he invites the various shopkeepers to the monthly meeting. Once they all arrive, he miraculously gives them new clothes (as Death knits together the bones of the dead), and then proceeds to control their bodies and minds, as though they are merely marionettes. They dance and speak in the way Aziraphale imagines, fulfilling his fantasy of a perfect Jane Austen-style ball (quite literally, the Danse Macabre.)

The shopkeepers have become the dead and Aziraphale controls them until the spell is broken--or rather until the window is broken.

To be honest, I don't think Aziraphale is really aware of how much he is able to transfigure his environment, including the humans who happen to be close by. Or, at least, I don't believe he does any of this with ill intent. He's just a bit blind to anything outside his fixation of wooing Crowley, at the moment. As a result, he creates a situation that is profoundly problematic and unnatural. Just like the dead in the graveyard have no agency when Death plays his fiddle, the Whickber Street shopkeepers are possessed by Aziraphale's intricate romantic fantasy and must dance as long as the music plays.

It is, in fact, only when the music stops, that the shopkeepers begin to realize that something is most certainly weird. The diagetic music (Mr. Anderson & Co.) abruptly cuts off when an approaching demon horde tosses a brick through the bookshop window. Now the spell, or in this case, miracle, begins to break down. While the shopkeepers still appear to be somewhat under the influence of Aziraphale's persuasive aura, a few of them glance down at their clothes in confusion and look around the bookshop, as though waking from a dream. And at this point, after a little finagling, Crowley escorts the humans out of the bookshop and out of Aziraphale's Danse Macabre.

Once the demons attack the bookshop Aziraphale's influence on his surroundings really starts to deteriorate. Throughout the season, he's been able to structure and manipulate reality (sometimes with Crowley's help) to suit his needs: protecting Gabriel, altering the Bentley, organizing the Ball, etc. But once the bookshop, his safe space, has been breached, he loses control of the situation. From this point in the narrative, nothing goes according to Aziraphale's plan. Aziraphale wants to protect Jimbriel, but the former archangel insists on giving himself over to the demons. Crowley leaves and Aziraphale has to defend the bookshop on his own, when he'd expected Crowley to come right back and save him. While defending the bookshop, Aziraphale reaches his "last" resort not once, but twice: first allowing Nina and Maggie to use his books (!!!) as weapons and then blowing up his halo in a last ditch effort to fend off the invaders. This was not on the agenda for today!

Things just continue to go downhill from there, Aziraphale losing all control of the situation. And by the time the Final Fifteen wraps up, the angel has lost his bookshop and possibly his most important relationship. By the end of the season, Aziraphale is no longer Death the Resurrectionist, the manipulator and puppeteer. Now the angel has become the puppet, dancing to Heaven's music.

[paperclipninja]

Ok, I don't know exactly where this is going but I can't stop thinking about the fact we got the Crowley/Aziraphale meet-cute in the opening of season 2 and the way the layers of storytelling utilised the same literary conventions our fave demon and angel were inspired by when trying and get Nina and Maggie together.

We get to see Aziraphale and Crowley's understanding of romance and love, or more importantly, their understanding of what they think it should look like, through their misguided set up attempts, and this primarily reveals to us, a) they're both hopeless romantics and b) they have no idea about the subtle and real indicators of love or a burgeoning relationship between two people. But that's ok, they're celestials whose only reference points are books, films and each other (the most unreliable sources of all, exhibit a: Aziraphale telling Crowley Maggie has a 'pash' on Nina).

You know who does know about those subtle indictors of love and blossoming romance? The very human people watching the show. And so throughout the season we witness a series of tropes and moments that indicate Aziraphale and Crowley are indeed the ones whose love story is unfolding, and as viewers we are drawn into certain conventions that we are conditioned to assume will play out and resolve in a particular way. The nebulae creating meet-cute, the ongoing forbidden relationship that continues to build, the friends to lovers dynamic through the centuries and of course, the comfortable and cosy present-day lives, with 'our car' and 'our bookshop' and drinks at pubs and a relatively open existence together.

With each insight into the past, we catch the cues that indicate the developing affection, trust and care between the two; the way Aziraphale looks at Crowley when he realises the crows are goats, the way Aziraphale and Crowley cover for each other with Job's children, the bullet catch ('nough said) and the drinking of wine afterwards. When humans engage with literature or film, we understand the subtext of such moments, something angels and demons seem to miss as they focus on the overt gestures of romance and love in storytelling as confirmation of its existence.

In the present day, its the perching on the same chair, Crowley knowing the angel's different tones, the way they pop into the room at the back of the shop for private conversations, Aziraphale grabbing Crowley's arm, Crowley answering the bookshop phone with, 'Fell's bookshop, we probably don't have what you're looking for and we wouldn't sell it to you anyway'. While these are only a few of the prompts we are given, our brains piece together this storytelling along with the body language and expressions throughout, understand that all these aspects combined flag a romantic relationship developing and so we are swept up in the love story.

The way the flashbacks are interwoven with the present day is disorientating, because we are simultaneously seeing the sweetness and complexity of the developing relationship over time while in the present, Aziraphale and Crowley begin to fall out of step. Yes it starts with Gabriel's arrival and Crowley vs. Aziraphale's reactions and responses (there are many excellent posts that discuss this in great detail), but any misalignment isn't happening all at once, it in itself is like a dance; they move apart but then move together again, as an audience we think oh no, tension! oh good, that's resolved! However the neat trick here is that with each move apart as the individual characters undertake their own journey within the story, the distance grows a little greater. Meanwhile the interactions between the two characters do not necessarily shift dramatically and the set up through the storytelling still suggests that any threats are ones they will face together and it will be ok in the end.

Even the ball, I wanted to be all *swoon* and swept up. Everything that was happening on my screen told my brain that it should be feeling excited and full of all the feelings of seeing these characters finally starting to make a move, like I should be feeling giddy like Aziraphale seems to be because, just like the attendees at the ball and the very literature that inspired it, there's the music and the soft lighting and the smitten little angel face. But it's all those things and also none of those things, because as has been so brilliantly pointed out in this insight, this is all juxtaposed with the demon invasion happening outside and Crowley's futile attempts to convey the seriousness of the situation to Aziraphale. Crowley is doing the movements but he's not part of their dance in that moment, the dance they've been doing for centuries, and as a viewer it feels off kilter.

But we've seen their story unfold, we know that the love and the relationship is all there, and once again we see Aziraphale and Crowley fend off Heaven and Hell, both taking individual risks to do so and protect each other. Heck, we see that an angel and demon can put their differences aside and disapparate off into the universe together, our brains are poised, but also wary at this point because it can't be this easy, can it?

Crowley has to have it explained to him why their plan didn't work, Maggie and Nina sit him down to do so, and in that moment we are also being told that you can't just be pushed together, the timing has to be right (cue small alarm ringing in the back of my head). Despite this, and we know Metatron is never good news, we, as viewers, are held precariously in the hand of the storyteller as Crowley's emotional declaration clashes with Aziraphale's news in a way that side steps the expectations that have been building throughout the season. The final moment of Aziraphale leaving hits SO hard because the expectations many of the storytelling conventions set in motion are subverted at the very last minute. And it's absolutely brilliant.

Just to be clear, I know there is far more complexity in the show, the characters and the storytelling, and tbh I don't even know if any of this rambling makes sense. But the fact is, my tiny mind is just awestruck at the layers of meta in the way our no.1 angel and demon are calling on literary conventions to try to make two people fall in love, while we're watching these conventions in action showing us two people falling in love. The result?

The most incredible tension, yes between the characters and their sudden divergence (which was actually not so sudden after all, we were just a bit distracted), but also tension in the storytelling as the duality of the love story and the individual character stories collide head first in that final moment and we are left trying to untangle our expectations from the reality of what has unfolded.

(that last paragraph should probably have been the whole post honestly)

[fuckyeahgoodomensfanfic]

Good Omens Fic Rec: What We Make of It (Shotgun Wedding)

The important thing, Crowley tells himself -- the most important thing -- is Adam, his brilliant, creative, empathetic nephew. Being fourteen's hard enough; the kid didn't ask to deal with the weight of the world on top of it. And if taking care of Adam means Crowley has to tough it out at a job he can’t stand, so be it. And if Crowley's job means that Adam’s charming English teacher is NOT a romantic possibility, well, that's just how things go. But the occasional drink with Aziraphale proves hard to resist. They frequent the same pub, so who can object to them saying hello? Briefly sharing a table? Perhaps a little conversation? The painful knowledge that it can’t be anything more -- not without somebody getting fired or sued or both -- well, that can't be helped. Until Crowley stumbles onto a terribly reckless idea...

Length: 213,340 words

AO3 Rating: Explicit / Spice Level 🔥🔥

Best for: Safe in Public, Human AU, Slow Burn, Pick-Me-Up

Triggers: None

Read it here, fic by charlottemadison

*Minor Spoilers* I was so certain that I had already posted about this one! When I saw I hadn't, well, that just warranted a reread didn't it! This is a very famous fic, so I wouldn't be surprised if you've already read this. But if you haven't, or maybe didn't know if it was worth committing to the length, I'm here to tell you its very much worth your time.

Not only is this an excellent parent story, it's also a fake marriage story! Crowley is a single parent to his nephew Adam who strikes up a friendship with Adam's English teacher Mr. Fell. The problem? The company Crowley works for has a strict rule against dating anyone in the School Industry. You know, it's a tiny bit dramatic, but also one of the cleverer ideas to justify writing a forbidden relationship. Does this happen in real life? I don't know, but the way this is written I fully believe it could! Either way, there's a loophole they can exploit so they can be together, and all it takes is a quick, "I do."

Ugh their relationship is so wonderful here. It's very mature and healthy, the kind of relationships we want to read about because they are just so safe. They're able to talk through their issues and feelings and know they're always going to be supported. The love they have is so heartwarming it’s sickening. A lot is told through letters and text messages, which I personally loved. These are different characters from canon, they've both been changed by their human lives and surroundings, but this story just understands who they are deep down. They're not shallow characterizations.

Who this story really gets right is Adam. I full on believe this is the best handling of Adam in any fanfic I've read for Good Omens. A majority of the plot revolves around him being narcoleptic and epileptic. It has tons of amazing things to say about health care, being chronically ill, and being a parent to a child with health issues. But outside of that it understands who Adam is. Someone who is brilliant, creative, a leader, manipulative, arrogant. And how those traits can be both positive and negative for him. He wants to change the world, but has some learning to do along the way. I loved him, and I love how much Crowley loves being a dad. He even remarks on it, that people don't expect men to love being parents. It's nice to read a story of such a devoted guardian.

A really excellent story, it deserves it's popularity! I would say this is largely safe for public. There are a couple explicit scenes tucked in but they are skippable and a small section of a large story. Which by the way, will fly by! This story does NOT feel like 200K words. If you haven't gotten around to this one, I highly suggest you do!

Read it here, fic by charlottemadison

[goodomensafterdark]

Writer's Guild Presents: His Partner's Mark (ch2)

Written by Niknak90 on Reddit for the GOAD subreddit!

In which Crowley gets fucked while wearing the turtleneck like he deserves (and Aziraphale leaves his mark on it). Also featuring Crowley getting yanked around in the necktie.

CW/TW/Tags-light D/S dynamics, dom Aziraphale/sub Crowley, top Aziraphale/bottom Crowley, come marking, genital switching (Crowley starts with penis, ends with vulva), blow jobs, anal sex, cunnilingus, PIV, butt plugs

Summary- Crowley and Aziraphale are officially together after the world doesn't end, but Aziraphale is still having trouble acknowledging it in public. After fighting about this, they go to the pub. An encounter with a carpet salesman forces Aziraphale to claim his demon in public. Said demon's enticing outfit inspires him to mark him in other ways behind closed doors.

Ch1-no smut, could honestly be a T-rated oneshot on its own, Ch2 is almost pure smut.

Ch2 Excerpt

Once they returned to the shop, Aziraphale locked the door and shut the curtains. Then he pressed Crowley against the door and kissed him, apparently forgetting his own rule.

“Someone’s impatient. Didn’t even give me a chance to take my glasses off.” Crowley said with a smirk. Normally, Aziraphale refused to kiss him with the glasses on, as he didn’t like it putting a barrier between them. As a result, Crowley almost never wore glasses past the entryway. He wanted as few barriers to being kissed and touched as possible. He wouldn’t even bother with clothes half the time if Aziraphale didn’t insist he wear something.

“We waited for centuries. I’d say that’s patience enough, wouldn’t you?” Aziraphale ran his hands down the soft turtleneck. Crowley melted into the touch. They’d only had this relationship for a few years in their long history together, so it all still felt so new. Would he get used to this after decades, centuries? Get bored by it, crave something new as humans tended to do? It seemed unimaginable.

Right now, he was the very opposite of bored as Aziraphale slipped one hand around his waist and pulled him in by the necktie for another kiss. “Now, are you ready to learn what sort of ideas this fetching ensemble has inspired, dear?”

“Somehow, I didn’t think strangling me with my own necktie was one of them.”

“If I strangled you out here, I couldn’t take you in the back room, which would be a shame. Would you like to join me there, dear?”

“Yessss, pleasssse.” He had gone there many times by now, had hoped that dressing up for his angel would lead to precisely this.

He hadn’t expected to enjoy submitting so much when Aziraphale first suggested it; in his encounters with mortals before they’d gotten together, he’d always needed to be the one in control. But there was something about letting his angel make the decisions, trusting that he would get exactly what he needed. Today, he craved the reassurance that his angel wanted him, needed him as badly as he needed Aziraphale.

“Excellent. Glasses off first, then come with me.” Crowley set his glasses on the horse statue, then let Aziraphale grab his necktie and lead him to the back room. It should be humiliating, far beneath a demon to be led around like an angel’s pet. It was, a little, but also arousing. And who would object to being led into Paradise?

Read more on AO3!

[goodomenslady]

Good Omens Fic Rec List 20

New rec list for the new year!

1. Twenty red roses by Anonymous Link:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/25384438 Rating: M Word Count: 10,827 (one-shot) Human AU. Professor Aziraphale and university student Crowley. Crowley has a massive crush on his older professor (though they're both adults), which only grows over the years. Aziraphale becomes his mentor. While they work closely together very well, Crowley never crosses the line into impropriety, until a fateful night when he runs across a thoroughly distraught, drunken Aziraphale in a pub. This fic starts out very sweet with a pining Crowley, gets serious and angsty when things heat up, and ends on a bittersweet yet hopeful note.

2. Leysingi by @childrenofthesunny and @janara7 Link:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/35649943 Rating: E Word Count: 7,302 (one-shot) Aziraphale is captured by Vikings on the island of Lindisfarne, when to his surprise, Crowley turns out to be one of their number. When Aziraphale is to be sold as a slave, Crowley steps in and buys him, much to Aziraphale's chagrin. Who does Crowley think he is? And anyway, Aziraphale doesn't need his help, thank you very much. Still, the other man who thought he owned the angel was planning on putting him to hard labor, so being 'owned' by Crowley ought to be at least better than that. In fact, it turns out to be so much better than Aziraphale could ever have dreamed. Spoiler alert: the ending is pure, glorious smut, and also contains some wonderful nsfw fanart.

3. Night at the Museum by @supergeek21 Link:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/33559249 Rating:  E Word Count: 2,095 (one-shot) Crowley and Aziraphale attend a gala at a museum. Crowley observes the crowd and basks in the heady, complicated emotions of human pride, desperation, and lust, at least until he realizes that some of those lovely vices are being directed at Aziraphale. The museum foundation's president is openly flirting with his angel, and this, obviously, cannot stand. Crowley intervenes to mark his claim, resulting in excellent semi-public sex.

4. Venetiae Delectatio by crepesandoysters  Link:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/30803078 Rating:  E Word Count: 13,417 (one-shot) Human AU. Aziraphale has been finagled by brother Gabriel into coming to Venice to help seal a shady multimillion dollar business deal with a bunch of other tedious businessmen, and the situation offends his conscience and bores him immeasurably. Until he meets Crowley, one of those businessmen who is far more fascinating than any of them, not to mention quite handsome. Aziraphale, however, isn't willing to set aside his morals no matter how good-looking the man is, leading Crowley to pull out all the stops to impress him. Features white suit Crowley, a speedboat, sexy shenanigans in a museum, and a satisfying turn of events in which Gabriel gets his comeuppance.

5. Worth Waiting For by @melayneseahawk Link:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/26780473 Rating:  E Word Count: 3,977 (one-shot) A perfectly lovely fic about Aziraphale and Crowley's first night of intimacy. Aziraphale is sweetly shy at first and then increasingly bold, until they're racing to get each other's clothes off (one of my favorite parts). Also, Crowley can't help but notice the angel is actually glowing, but with a divine warmth that encompasses the both of them rather than poses any danger to his own demonic nature. His discovery that Aziraphale is ticklish adds to the fun. Wonderful  lovemaking, great characterization, and wings unfurling.

6. When a Demon and an Angel Make Love, They Forget They're Not Human @springapreppe Link:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/24653974 Rating:  E Word Count: 5,390 (one-shot) After the Apocalypse-that-wasn't, Aziraphale discusses his newfound freedom with Crowley, and realizes that he wants to try making love with his beloved demon. But when they give in to their passion, they discover that two powerful supernatural beings in the throes of ecstasy can have some pretty dire consequences on the surrounding architecture. A fun and raunchy romp.

7. Getting to Know You by @holycatsandrabbits Link:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/42956547 Rating:  E Word Count: 2,661 (2/2 chapters, complete) Human AU/Naga Crowley. Crowley works in a pub and normally keeps his life as a shape-changing snake creature a secret. But not secret enough from his observant and outrageously cute neighbor Aziraphale, who knocks on his door one night and asks for his assistance in getting rid of some pesky mafia men, who are rather irritated about the matter of some money that Aziraphale may or may not have stolen and donated to charity. Yes, Aziraphale is a bit of a bastard, but surely stealing from criminals isn't all bad? This is one hot little fic with a surprising amount of story packed into it, with Crowley to the rescue and a very, very grateful Aziraphale.

8. Summer's End by @feraltuxedo Link:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/41379204 Rating: E Word Count: 47,342 (13/13 chapters, complete) Human/future dystopian AU. This is the zombie/cottagecore/sexworker fic you didn't know you needed. In a future England where the climate is too hot and undead demons roam at night, sexworker Aziraphale is grateful for his little caravan, his work which lets him meet interesting people, his small comforts, and most of all his freedom. In a world where one small misstep can send a person into destitution, he's determined to hang on to what he's got. Until one particular client enters his life. Crowley is handsome, mysterious, and dashed handy with the garden and all sorts of tools, and Aziraphale discovers one problem with his independent lifestyle:  he's frightfully lonely. So he takes a big step out of his comfort zone and invites Crowley to come live with him. Words cannot begin to describe the incredible emotional journey of Aziraphale in this story, as he learns to trust and open his heart and life to the man he loves. Crowley has his own issues, and a shady past that comes back to haunt him. Combined with great worldbuilding and suppporting characters (I just loved Tracy) it makes for a gripping fic that draws you in and doesn't let go.

[enchantress-emily]

Good Omens Fic Recs, Round 2

Time for another rec post with some excellent GO fics that have been added to my AO3 bookmarks since the first time I did this!

Multichapter:

Villainous by @ineffablepenguin

Once Upon A Time…

There was a red-haired sorcerer who lived alone in a high tower, and a blond prince who lived in a palace full of people. And they were both of them desperately lonely.

The Kingdoms of Empyrion and the Sorcerers of Apollyon have hated each other for hundreds of years, ever since the Great War. They do not interact, other than to occasionally try to kill one another. And they certainly do not make friends.

Crow is an exhausted sorcerer who just wants everyone to leave him the hell alone: for the Sorcerer’s Council to stop harassing him to live up to his potential, and for wannabe Empyrion Heroes to stop attacking his tower to try and kill him. Until one day when he meets Prince Azra of the High Fells, who doesn’t behave anything like he’s supposed to…

A splendid adventure that brings in the vibes of multiple fairy tales and fantasy stories without being based on any specific one. (See the list of Easter egg references at the end!) It's made clear that Azra is noticeably chubby and that Crow wouldn't want him to be any other way, which is something I always appreciate in a fic. The spice level (E) is higher than I typically read, but the story is well worth a little awkward skimming of sex scenes.

Morningstar Abbey by @andromeda4004

No one who had ever seen Aziraphale Fell in his youth would have supposed him born to be a hero. His situation in life, the character of his father and mother, his own person and disposition, were all equally against him. But when a gentleman is to be a hero, the attractions of a comfortable, quiet home cannot prevent him. Something must and will happen to throw his destiny in his way.

One should never forget that between a hero and his destiny, one will always find a villain.

Trusting parish rector Aziraphale attempts to navigate Regency Bath, the marriage market, and the complexities of his own heart in this take on Jane Austen's Northanger Abbey, written for the Ineffably Austen event, March 2023.

I enjoyed this recently-completed fic very much! The author put a lot of thought into creating a more inclusive version of the Regency era, detailed in the author's notes at the end of each chapter. There's plenty of Georgette Heyer influence along with the Jane Austen.

What We Make of It (Shotgun Wedding) by charlottemadison

The important thing, Crowley tells himself -- the most important thing -- is Adam, his brilliant, creative, empathetic nephew. Being fourteen's hard enough; the kid didn't ask to deal with the weight of the world on top of it.

And if taking care of Adam means Crowley has to tough it out at a job he can’t stand, so be it.

And if Crowley's job means that Adam’s charming English teacher is NOT a romantic possibility, well, that's just how things go.

But the occasional drink with Aziraphale proves hard to resist. They frequent the same pub, so who can object to them saying hello? Briefly sharing a table? Perhaps a little conversation? The painful knowledge that it can’t be anything more -- not without somebody getting fired or sued or both -- well, that can't be helped.

Until Crowley stumbles onto a terribly reckless idea...

Oh my goodness, the gorgeous emotional intensity of this fic! It's the slowest of slow burns, but the pace allows ample room for the gradual realization (for both the characters and the reader) of just how well Crowley and Aziraphale's respective strengths and weaknesses mesh with each other to make a strong, stable whole. As I said about Villainous above, the story is very much worth having to skim over some scenes that are more explicit than I usually like.

You're Just a Little Under Rehearsed by MickyRC (@one-with-the-floor)

Drama teacher Crowley loves directing the Tadfield Community Players' shows—interacting with the rest of the staff at the community center, not so much. So when he meets the new accompanist for this year's musical, he's shocked to find that he might actually like him. Possibly more than like, if he's being honest.

Aziraphale is fresh from leaving a long career as a church pianist, and hoping that a new job will get him out of the lonely rut he's found himself in. The attention and kindness of the flashy community theater director are unexpected, but not unwelcome. Far from it.

But with a community theater to run, a show to put on, and a disgruntled R.P. Tyler looking for any excuse to get rid of Crowley and his theater program, will they be able to make a relationship work? And, more importantly, can they make sure the show still goes on?

Very fun and wholesome, packed with putting-on-a-play shenanigans (Peter Pan, in this case). The Crowley is Good With Kids AO3 tag is in full force here; his interactions with the younger members of the cast, especially the Them, are really well-done.

the many-venomed earth by curtaincall (@fremulon)

It’s the trial of the century: bestselling mystery author Anthony Crowley stands accused of poisoning his former lover. He’s got means (arsenic), motive (the breakup), and opportunity (a meeting the night of the murder); his guilt seems certain.

Certain, that is, to everyone except Lord Aziraphale Eastgate, rare book collector and amateur detective. Aziraphale’s not sure why he’s so convinced of Crowley’s innocence, but he’s determined to save him from the gallows--by finding the real murderer before it’s too late.

This is a mashup with Strong Poison, one of Dorothy Sayers' Lord Peter Wimsey/Harriet Vane novels, and the combination works really well. Peter’s intelligence and post-case moral qualms both transfer nicely onto Aziraphale, and the plot and characters hit the same beats as the original novel without being an exact copy.

Oneshots:

A Soft Kind of Strength by @anonymousdandelion

"Y’r soft,” Crowley mumbles one day, drowsily nuzzling into Aziraphale’s well-cushioned lap. “Ssosoft.”

Aziraphale blinks, smiles bemusedly, and ruffles his partner’s hair. “Yes, dear, I’m well aware. Go back to sleep.”

“Ssssoft,” Crowley repeats, more insistently, and it seems he hasn’t quite dozed off again after all, fixated now on whatever thought grabbed his half-asleep and half-inebriated brain. He lifts his head, rolling so he’s looking up into Aziraphale’s face. “You. Soft. S’good. Good thing. Y’know that, that, that s’good, right?”

I'm a big fan of Soft Aziraphale (in every sense of the word), and this sweet fic makes the excellent point that, rather than his being secretly strong under the softness, his softness is his strength.

Temperance by effing_gravity

In the wake of the Fauxpocalypse, Aziraphale does his utmost to live his best and pettiest life.

In which Aziraphale makes a point of both consciously ignoring Gabriel's remarks about the shape of his corporation and dispensing blessings and gentle encouragement to humans struggling with their own body image issues.

Keeping Tabs by @a-case-of-the-hiccups and FriendshipCastle

A juxtaposition of Heaven's archive of Aziraphale's miracles compared with the sadly lacking state of Hell's temptation logs.

This fic was obviously written by people with cataloguing experience! I like the OCs in charge of Heaven and Hell’s respective departments, especially the tetchy, bespectacled archivist angel Pravuil.

Adopt Don't Shop by @luckyspike

Inspired by Chekhov's cat AU comics 'Good Meowmens', here is a fanfic in which Anathema and Newt are humans, and Aziraphale and Crowley are cats. Not disguised as cats, not trapped in cat bodies, just actual elderly cats that are inseparable.

A truly excellent bit of crack! Aziraphale and Crowley’s personalities come out surprisingly clearly in their cat selves. For extra fun, play spot-the-angel/demon with the other cats at the shelter!

[thesherrinfordfacility]

A word vomit of GO consciousness that will make the barest scintilla of sense BUT hear me out

1.

Are we 100% convinced that Agnes Nutter and her freaky-deaky prophecies are not going to make an appearance in S2? I realise Anathema burnt them in an excellent moment of character self-revelation but the whole "Ye Saga Continues" seemed rather ominous, far too ominous that it would be forgotten about? Can we be sure that she did have a wee skim of any that would be majorly important, and make a note of them for future reference? Send it on to Aziraphale in his bookshop (because you must be JOKING if you think I don't believe those two are now firm penpals)

2.

Speaking of future reference, others have put it out there and something in me agrees and wishes to reiterate: the parallel of Nina/Maggie alongside Crowley/Aziraphale seems just as important as the specific presence of Nina/Maggie themselves... Does Agnes put out a prophecy that refers to a couple specifically in Soho? And C/A in their infinite and ancient wisdom think it refers to that cute lady couple across the road?

3.

OR, separate thought on Nina/Maggie, in the Crowley Summons Force Lightning Scene™, presuming it hasn't been cut especially different to the actual scene, we see Nina and Maggie in the coffeeshop when Crowley summons lightning... And that lightning hits the shop... So, not necessarily worrying about why had a meteorological temper tantrum, but what was the effect that that lightning had on the ladies in the shop? And is that actually the start of them becoming involved in the story?

4.

I'm 100% convinced that Amnesiac!Gabriel is not even one of, let alone the main storyline. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if the Gabriel disappearance barely spans more than, say, two episodes. I feel somewhat (don't @ me) that the storyline is a little bit glib and a bit... shallow? Which, given NG has an Intellect We Shalt Never Comprehend, leads me to believe it is a vaguely rose-pink herring and that for the purpose of the trailer and not spoiling anything actually pertinent to the main story arc, they have deliberately centred the trailer on a pretty funny skit that, going by general continuity of the clips used in the trailer, only really lasts a short time and will provide the segue to the main story...? Imho, it's a bit of a downgrade for a story to originally focus on the contextual morality and mechanics of Despatching the Antichrist, to... well.

5.

RESURRECTIONIST PUB. This is the bit I'm really looking forward to, especially now we've had a sneak peak of the article that presumably gets Aziraphale's attention (the Jukebox Jeopardy). I've put it in another post half-jokingly, but this is the same kind of magic (unsure of the nomenclature regrettably) that presumably affects the Bentley. My understanding for the rationale behind the mystical haunting à la Bentley, and it's been a while since I read the book so might have this completely wrong, is that through exposure to Crowley, it is affected by Crowley's demonic influences... Nothing awful, but has absorbed enough to have adopted the Queen-obsessed IDGAF attitude.

It would therefore stand to reason that the jukebox is being effectively influenced by a demon in a similar way....? So, with that in mind, what if (and it's a leap, I grant you):

-Gabriel gets kidnapped by demons, God only knows why (and probably orchestrated the bloody hoohah)

-Gabriel escapes/demons forget to lock the door/cast a spell on him and send him off bollock-naked unto the misty London night

-Heaven eventually track down Gabriel at the shop, and possibly enlist Az and Crowley to help them find whoever did this to Gabe (for a good ole-fashioned Retribution)

-They track them down through various news articles (which, let's face it, is very Witchfinder Army of them, I'm proud), but especially one that leads them to the Resurrectionist pub and its Jukebox?

QED: Think it's a little coincidental that one perceives a Bentley and a jukebox with the exact same symptoms, potentially instigated by long-term exposure to a hell-raising demon, and not conclude as being tangentially related

6.

This is kinda related to the above but not really and I have no idea what I'm trying to get at, but one thing I noted in the Con panel audio clip of Muriel and Aziraphale is that Az... Doesn't really seem surprised by Muriel being there? Like, sure, she's not a Horrible Boss Archangel, but he almost seems immediately... affable, to this random angel just appearing at his shop, in full white Met Police kit, talking like they possessed an original Bow Street Runner...?

Cmon, he obviously knows straight away what they are and why they're there, but he just seems so... Calm, about it all? Not one bit anxious, not one bit worried that they're there to spy on him? Almost definitely on orders from Heaven? Who, whilst Az has broken away from them, could still very well destroy him or, worse (?), put him on the one way train to Falling? So what I'm trying to say I guess (honestly I'm not even sure) is that - have Az and Crowley actually been seeing more and more angels/demons coming to Earth for a lil vacation? Have taken a metaphorical leaf out of their book, and decided to find out if Earth truly does Slap?

I no doubt will continue to add to this but in the meantime I will proceed to scream into the abyss in the hope that an echo bounces back and metamorphoses into an Intelligent Thought™, such is my preferred form of meditation

Ciao for now~

[quillyfied]

Things I’m noticing on this rewatch, which I’m hoping to take slow and ponder on but we will see how it goes, PART THREE (obviously major Good Omens season 2 spoilers throughout, specifically for S2E3)

- First, going back to the previous episode: thank you to the person who reminded me that the Dirty Donkey pub is the pub that Crowley plans his holy water heist in!! (Which means Crowley LITERALLY planned his heist on Aziraphale’s stoop, unless Aziraphale moved the pub to be closer to himself in case it happened again. Hmmmm.)

- Also. I have been reminded that “Give me coffee or give me death” is a modified quote of “give me liberty or give me death” by an American revolutionary. Which. Explains all the Statues of Liberty around the place. I am Slow.

- Anyway, to e3: the fact that Jim has a labeled mug and hot chocolate canister. I feel like he tried to ingest something he wasn’t supposed to, so Aziraphale made sure he had his name on his things XD

- The sex worker is a treasure, for one; I hope I am reminded of her name soon.

- MURIEL. SWEET ANGEL BABY. Sorry they’re not a baby but they are so adorably innocent and inexperienced. I love that Aziraphale treats them so kindly despite his obvious terror. Though. It is a kindness that reminds me of my coworkers. I work in childcare. I know a “childcare” disposition when I see it.

- Okay, the framing there: the box, and the hat. The mystery, and the detective cap. Excellent.

- The gentle tutelage, Muriel’s scrunchy face when they realize what tea is for—I’m just SCREECHING.

- AND CROWLEY GETTING IN ON IT. THE WAY HIS WHOLE DEMEANOR IMMEDIATELY GOES FROM BITCHING TO DELIGHTED. AAAAAAAAAAH.

- AND HE’S SITTING. ON THE ARM. OF AZIRAPHALE’S CHAIR.

- The coparenting. Muriel’s utter naivety. I’m just.

- “I’m not sure how you lot have managed to stay in charge.” “I’m not sure we actually have.” SAY IT LOUDER.

- OKAY BUT HOW DOES HELL MEASURE MIRACLES THO

- ONE FABULOUS KISS CROWLEY. IS THAT ALL IT TAKES.

- “To tell if humans are in love you need to wait a few days” not bad advice really but also unrelated how many days are in like 6000 years? Asking for a friend.

- AZIRAPHALE TALKING TO THE BENTLEY AND IMMEDIATELY BEING A BIGGER MENACE ON THE ROAD THAN CROWLEY. VINDICATION.

- Thing the first about the opening theme: Crowley crawls up the cliff and Aziraphale lands on it. Just a nice touch.

- The movie theater in the opening has a different feature title and picture on the big screen every episode. I missed it for the first one but last time it was “A Companion to Owls” (which is a verse from Job that I only know because the full quote is “I am a brother to dragons, and a companion to owls” and it was a lamentation but of course teenage Quilly thought that was the coolest thing she had ever read). This time: The Resurrectionists, coupled with a shot of the Gabriel statue.

- I think Crowley’s hair is s1 color in this minisode but I can’t be sure. Lighting is…not. :P

- THE BONUS CONTENT SAYS NEIL GAIMAN THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUN TO LET DAVID TENNANT DO AS MANY SCOTTISH ACCENTS AS HE CAN THIS CHAPTER. I AM DELIGHTED

- The second Elspeth says “English” Crowley starts losing it, which in turn makes ME lose it.

- I love the bringing back in the discussion from the book about privilege making its way here, and given a more visceral illustration and testing. Though I love Crowley literally helping Elspeth pull the wagon, a thing I’m not sure he’s ever willingly done in his life, and poking holes in Aziraphale’s arguments all the way.

- Wee Morag’s morals have about the same utility in this situation as Aziraphale’s, tbh. I’m not sure I have the mental capacity tonight to deconstruct that the way it deserves.

- Aha! Knew I recognized the tune in the car! Danse Macabre!

- He is AFFECTIONATE towards the BENTLEY. Which Crowley can FEEL.

- YELLOW CAR. DAMN YOU JOHN FINNEMORE.

- but it is pretty, Crowley!

- Spoilsport.

- I fully did not internalize the tartan hills and Nessie the first time around. I saw them. I immediately chalked them up to personal fever dream.

- The demon’s name is Josh. Why is that delightful??

- He wears a kilt! And has a wonderful little monologue about dung pits and tongue ripping!

- Beelzebub being off is subtle. Almost too subtle.

- The many stacks of books Crowley carries around and then chucks this episode. Love it.

- Crowley not having a cow about a fly seems weird tbh

- Vavoom. Where tf did he learn the word vavoom

- “David Tennant has occasionally played a doctor” OH HAS HE NOW

- the almost musical pulls Michael Sheen does for miracles this season. Lovely.

- Also: the dual nature of Mr. Dalrymple. Needs bodies to do good and study so he can save lives. Treats the people bringing him the bodies like dirt.

- Okay: is Crowley freezing time, or just putting Dalrymple in a mental time out? Very curious to know. The trivia bit on the side references the s1 trick of having Jean-Claude’s actor stand very still to achieve the time stop there, so perhaps freezing time?

- Alright moment of silence for how very very good Crowley’s outfit is this scene. Yum.

- The instant penny drop when Aziraphale realizes the reason for the body snatching, how he immediately uses prevention of future harm to classify it as Good.

- Also. His emotional reaction to the kid’s tumor. ;A;

- Edinburgh is so colorful!!

- HIS SMUG LITTLE GRIN WHEN HE POPS OUT HIS HAT AND NOTEBOOK. Also, wtf is in his hat. What is that.

- Okay but the double sided sign, and how Aziraphale first sees the Jesus side. IMPORTANT. PAINFUL.

- PRESS 66. That’s what’s in the hat.

- And Aziraphale being every bit as awkward as Muriel in his interrogation. Just slightly less weird. Angels.

- Listen I’ll probably say it again at episode 6 but the sheer magnitude of the importance that Gabriel and Beelzebub fell in love over the course of a year—with EACH OTHER. Not with earth or humans or creation. Just each other. Hggk.

- Alright, but Aziraphale DOES see the other half of the sign here. Does he get it? DOES HE GET IT?? No. Of course not.

- “I’ll help but it still doesn’t make it right.” That is such an uncomfortable truth to sit with. The whole adventure is, really. The whole show. SHADES OF GREY.

- Okay, I’m pausing this episode way too much, it’s been over an hour since I started this episode, but—the way Aziraphale overcorrects is. Sad? Elspeth and Wee Morag aren’t here to decrease human suffering. Outside of their own, of course, which can also be achieved by digging up a body that’s fresh. Scope of intent and how Aziraphale simplifies and moralizes it. Huh.

- Lot more this season about Aziraphale’s miracle allowances, too. Very interesting concept.

- MIGHT HAVE SLIGHTLY OVERDONE IT ON THE HOLE. MIGHT YOU INDEED.

- interesting how his dithering is what causes his chance to heal Wee Morag to slip through his fingers. And yet raising her is out of the question. Can Aziraphale even do that? We know he and Crowley together generate a ton of power, but what about on his own?

- interesting that elspeth takes Wee Morag to Dalrymple and is already contemplating suicide despite her actions suggesting she intended to keep on living. Hmm.

- Dalrymple the Ass. Not just unwilling to get his own hands dirty but disparaging of those who will. Another moral dichotomy.

- And elspeth also not wanting to get dug up? Wee Morag’s death affecting her?

- CROWLEY OFF HIS HEAD WITH LAUDANUM IS THE FUNNIEST POSSIBLE OUTCOME

- How much is 90 guineas compared to 5 pounds? …google says a guinea is worth slightly more than a pound. So. For the eight pounds Elspeth and Wee Morag were aiming for, for the three pounds shafted that Wee Morag died for…Aziraphale literally had over ten times that amount in his pocket. MORALS.

- …the stupid special features had the math onscreen already. Sort of. Heck.

- Yeah okay this scene adds way more context to Crowley asking for holy water fifty or so years later. Yikes. YIKES. The implications of it all!!

- Asking the phone nicely. Love these little Aziraphaleisms.

- The awning of a new age XD

- The little tipping of his cap!! Adorable!

- Nina and Maggie actually TALKING. HEY CROWLEY ARE YOU PAYING ATTENTION???

- The rain is overdone and the awning rips. Gosh. Whatever could that be implying?

- Seriously how is Crowley able to pull these spells out of Jim?? And seemingly ONLY him???

- Alright, this prophecy bit. Seems to me to be about the future, also about the past, which is very biblical tbh. Specifically Isaiah. But I’m not up to snuff enough on my Bible to tell what all Gabriel is quoting. Besides the Buddy Holly.

- HELLO SHAX

- Okay, realizing that no angels pop up in Aziraphale’s shop in season 1, either. Gabriel and Sandalphon enter from the outside. I’ll need to rewatch to see if Aziraphale actively invites them in, or if it’s just blocking. I think it might just be blocking. But what an interesting detail, that only humans can enter at will and all else must be invited!

- The threatening of Aziraphale continues. The anxiety of Crowley intensifies. The obliviousness of Jim resets.

- Always too late. Poor Crowley.

Yeah this took an hour and a half to watch XD but I’m having fun. And killing quite a lot of time. Am I making sense or creating a thoughtful analysis? No, I don’t think so. But I’m solidifying the canon in my head, at least.

[feraltuxedo]

Fic Recs: Musician Crowley AU

Give Crowley an instrument and he'll have my heart. There are so many excellent AUs with that trope, and a whole lot of them are still on my marked-for-later, to be savoured like a good piece of music. I love all flavours of Crowley's musicianship - whether he's a rock star or a violin virtuoso. Somehow, it just makes sense.

Anyway, here are some of my favourites.

Reunion by snae_b Rating: E Words: 22920 Summary: Aziraphale runs into an ex that he's never quite fallen out of love with.

We don't see Crowley actually making a lot of music in this story, but it hardly matters, because what we get instead is a rock star catching up with his bookshop-owner ex after a decade apart. And they do a lot of catching up. In the bookshop. Above the bookshop. In Crowley's hotel room. I love the chemistry between the two characters in this one, the bittersweet romance of reconnecting after so long. But it's also incredibly funny and steaming hot.

Bi M' Aingeal (Be My Angel) by IneffableToreshi Rating: T Words: 4905 Summary: Crowley has a crush on the beautiful man who comes to see him play and sing every Friday night. On this particular night, for the Valentine's Day celebrations, the guitarist decides to try out a special song that he wrote himself...

Such a sweet meet-cute set during a folk night at a pub. Crowley as a Gaelic-speaking folk singer and Aziraphale as an adoring audience member. All fluff and tenderness and a wonderful use of song to communicate feelings. There's a wonderful atmosphere to this and it's all due to the unique setting.

The Piano Serpent by journeytogallifrey Rating: T Words: 3893 Summary: Aziraphale owns The Flaming Sword, which is one of the premier gay bars in London. Everyone knows this... except for their pianist, Crowley. While the regulars take bets over whether he's the clueless straight person he seems, Aziraphale just tries to prevent himself from falling further. But one night Crowley plays a song written specially to honor their regulars, and Aziraphale can't hold the truth in any longer. How will Crowley react? Will the truth really set them free? Based on the post where Billy Joel's The Piano Man is really about a clueless straight pianist in a gay bar. Or in our case, 'straight'.

Surprisingly tender for what's really quite a silly premise . This is an ensemble piece set at a gay bar, and in the course of this one-shot, we get to know all the regulars. Their fun speculation about just how clueless Crowley the pianist is is combined with loving notes on their own backstories. And in the middle of it there's Aziraphale serving drinks, and Crowley playing his songs.

Or Be Nice by charlottemadison Rating: E Words: 151366 Summary: Crowley and Aziraphale are neighbours. And...it does not go at all well, until it does. A human AU in which Aziraphale is a bookseller, Crowley is a drummer, and they are both petty disasters in the worst/best way.

“So what’s your deal?” “My-my-my deal?” Aziraphale stammered. “I’m a bookseller, is my deal.” “Oh,” Crowley replied, sounding as uninterested as it was possible to sound. “It’s just, I couldn’t help overhearing, and --” Aziraphale swallowed hard. “You really are an accomplished musician. But I thought -- for after 11PM -- perhaps we could reach some arrangement?” “Arrangement?” Aziraphale felt his his smile turning forced. “Such as, perhaps, playing the drums *before* eleven? Instead of after?” Crowley stared blankly at him. In fact he stared for so long that Aziraphale briefly wondered if he'd lapsed into ancient Greek again, which he was known to do in bad dreams or during panic attacks.

An absolutely epic tale of neighbourly disputes, featuring two supreme bastards trying to one-up each other while maybe accidentally falling in love. The back and forth is hilarious and drives the entire story. Crowley is a drummer and he loves to drum. When Aziraphale is asleep. I love how the drumset is weaponised here. But in the course of the story, classical-music lover Aziraphale learns to appreciate not just the drumming, but Crowley's musicianship in general.

The Greater Tadfield Friends Of Music Autumn Concert by CopperBeech Rating: E Words: 27878 Summary: Anthony Crowley, marketing consultant and competent amateur flautist, finds he can at least flee the smoke and congestion of London if not the golden handcuffs of his job. He’s got no personal life to leave behind; he likes things anonymous, and rough, and even a little dangerous, and far enough from home that he won’t have to deal with entanglements. So what’s he doing obsessing about a mannerly, daintily groomed, kindly man who he’s not even sure is gay? And how’s he going to cope with a hotbed of gossip, a lovelorn tubist serenading the witch next door, and an irascible music director with a Black Belt in baton-throwing?

I absolutely love a small-town setting and this story is such a fun and strangely nostalgic look at amateur musicmaking in that context. Crowley is a newcomer trying to find his place in an established society (both Tadfield and the orchestra) and Aziraphale is the privileged benefactor of the town. But there's a whole host of characters around them that gives this story so much flavour and makes it a real delight.

[ultimate-quartz]

my main takeaways from good omens s2 & my own theories for s3

This is going to be long and slightly incoherent, but I've watched the second season of Good Omens several times now and need to put my thoughts out into the universe to make sense of them. Proceed if you wish for a lengthy take and some light reaching.

Season 2 of Good Omens has already been acknowledged by Neil Gaiman as an in-between, a sort of setup to get to where the story needs to be for the third and final season. As many people have already pointed out, there are multiple hanging threads left at the end of season 2 (some more obvious than others - see Book of Life). The season was described as "slow and romantic" before release, and I wholeheartedly agree with this assessment despite the whole demon invasion that occurs in the finale. Season two does an excellent job at weaving in new concepts and making some existing themes in the show more evident than they were in the first season. I will not explain these all in detail, but they will be important to my theory on how season three will tie everything together.

The whole goal of this season, in my view, was not to move the dial in terms of major world-saving events, but to develop the characters of Crowley and Aziraphale further, alongside their exceedingly complex relationship. They do just the correct amount of growing to wind up in their required positions by the end of the finale: Aziraphale, making one last attempt to save Heaven by accepting the position of Supreme Archangel from the Metatron, and Crowley, abandoned by his love and cast out from both Heaven and Hell. There is a parallel of incredible loneliness and rejection on both sides following Crowley's confession and Aziraphale's proposition in the last few minutes of the season. Their individual perspectives on dejection and doubts on the paths they've chosen will heavily influence the direction of season three along with, what I believe will be, an incredibly difficult reunion and regain of trust.

Let me start with Aziraphale, as the end of the season leaves him in a very interesting situation. The Metatron, a semi-omniscient(?) being who has been exposed by Crowley's experience in Heaven as potentially having a considerable investment in Armageddon, has offered Aziraphale the role of a (metaphorical) lifetime: Supreme Archangel. Aziraphale takes this offer after some considerable heartache, still believing that he can make worthwhile change from within the walls of Heaven. It is important to note that the Metatron is the sole being who can alter the Book of Life, a text which recounts all existence, and is heavily referred to in season 2.

Aziraphale has arrived in a Heaven which has had its entire status quo upended, and will take authority over the archangels who have already expressed discourse over their current hierarchy. I don't see any world in which Michael and Uriel let Aziraphale take rule without some difficulty. While I do believe that Aziraphale will be allowed to make initial changes (ones that won't threaten the great plan) due to his status with the Metatron, I do think his experiences with Crowley and within Humanity will cause him to question the plan, especially once the details of the Second Coming are revealed to him.

The Second Coming is an incredible setup for the main plotline of the final season, from a narrative perspective. We have already seen one foiled Armageddon, but this time the inclusion of the resurrection (after all of those hints from season 2; the Resurrectionist Pub, the revived Nazi zombies, etc.) is set to make the story very interesting on levels both Earthly and ethereal. I believe the Metatron will use this plan to hide the plans for rapture from Aziraphale, making Aziraphale put into action the very events which would destroy humanity. The Metatron has already put the chess pieces in place; he has Aziraphale's trust, as indicated by the odd scene in which he offers Aziraphale a coffee, and he has a very gullible angel left on Earth.

This moves me into my thoughts on Muriel. As a side character, Muriel is pure comic relief, and is easily overlooked as a device to reveal the truth about Gabriel's disappearance. Now, this may be a reach, but thanks to some cunning fans I have done my own dive into the accounts of the angel Muriel in original scriptures. There are accounts which identify Muriel as becoming Abbadon (or Abbaton), the angel of death. The sticking points of this recounting are that Abbadon oversees the Bottomless Pit, has been identified by some interpretations as the antichrist / Satan, and performs work of destruction while involved in the Last Judgement. I don't think it's a coincidence that Neil Gaiman included a character named Muriel, whose namesake is historically linked to the Second Coming. I believe Muriel was chosen by the Metatron specifically to stay on Earth as he knows that she(?) could be easily swayed to act in any future plans which would involve intervening with Humanity. While the Metatron can keep Muriel at an arm's length due to her dim-wittedness, he keeps Aziraphale close as a potential danger to the second attempt at Armageddon.

This will lead me into Crowley's part in season 3. We know by Shax's return to Hell that Crowley might be able to move back into his flat, which is where I believe we will find him at the beginning of the season. Crowley opened himself up to Aziraphale and, at his most vulnerable, was abandoned by the one person he thought he could trust. I expect a boatload of sadness and vice from his side of the story. In having his flat back, Crowley would be staying close to the bookshop, which was entrusted to Muriel upon Aziraphale's ascension. I don't necessarily see Crowley moving to try and get Aziraphale back on his own, nor do I see him involving himself in the affairs of Hell now that Shax is on top. In my opinion, it will take a significant plot event to make Crowley understand that something is very wrong, that the Second Coming will bring about the end, and that Aziraphale is indeed being used - placing him in direct danger. As upset as Crowley must be from the argument at the end of season 2, I don't think anything will truly stop him when he believes Aziraphale to be in serious danger.

As for the details, I am still muddy on a lot of elements. The Book of Life must return in a significant way with the direct connection to the Metatron, and I would not be surprised if the Metatron himself has been interfering with the written record of existence himself to aid in his plans. Some keen observers have mentioned how odd particular elements of season 2 were, in a way that feels like some of the show's fundamentals have been tampered with. There are loose threads that don't get followed up on, such as the mysteriously vanishing Eccles cakes, and moments in the historical recounting of Aziraphale and Crowley's meetings which feel just odd enough to merit a second glance at the narrative we are being fed.

One thing I am certain of is that Aziraphale and Crowley are being purposefully separated by whatever force sees them as a threat to the recurring plan of Armageddon. We have enough evidence to believe that an angel and a demon together can be incredibly powerful; this is shown through the 25-Lazarii miracle that Crowley and Aziraphale perform to hide Gabriel, as well as more inconspicuously in the flickering of lights when Gabriel and Beelzebub hold hands and sing together. Whether or not this is due to the nature of opposing forces alone, or exacerbated by the overwhelming presence of love, is still to be seen.

Love is where the story begins and ends, in my view. It is the one constant that will ensure that our protagonists prevail, as we have been shown time and time again, both implicitly (through longing glances and helpful hands) and explicitly (in small touches and a kiss of last-ditch desperation) that Crowley and Aziraphale love each other in a way that supersedes both Heaven and Hell. The way that their love is explored through parallels within Humanity, and doubled down upon even in their worst moments, leads me to believe that there is no choice but for them to have a happy ending. Love will be the one thing that neither Aziraphale nor Crowley can ignore, and I foresee a difficult but euphoric reunion in season 3 which will ensure victory for neither Heaven nor Hell, but for Humanity; for it is Humanity which taught them how to love each other.

I have many more thoughts, but this is where the train of coherence ends. Let me know if you have any additions and/or would like to theorize!

[jaybarou]

The Resurrectionist started to send their "Everyday" copies to Maggie's shop when? Why send it to her? They are in Edinburgh. What's the chance of the pub sending their miracled songs to the only street in the world that would end up under an Angel's scrutiny?

Someone intervened so the miracle would be obvious, maybe to unmask Gabriel. Or not. Because Aziraphael would be a bad choice if the objective was to snitch to heaven.

Then someone wanted Aziraphael to help Gabriel. A smooth way to get him out of the picture. Him and Belzebub. Someone wanted their spots vacant.

Or silent.

Gabriel had started to prophecise. Storms, zombies, the angels and morning stars... We have not seen him make prophecies, not even when he had all his memories. So what was that about?

It is possible that someone wanted him out of the picture, not because of his demon paramour but because of something else he was doing. Something maybe not even he knew he was doing.

Gabriel, who was in charge of announcing the first coming, but now won't be here for the second. If Gabriel is the announcer, what does it mean that he is spewing doomsday verses? Maybe that the second coming is going to go pear-shaped?

Also Saraquiel was very eager to whip his memory, even without him present. And her loyalties are not clear at all. She "amen"d when the others did about the end of the world, but then she helped Crowley and Muriel. She was the one who found where the supermiracle was coming from, so she was in an excellent position to lie or hide any extra information.

She is also key in the Crowley memory puzzle. It was funny when it was about Furfur, who was maybe a minor angel and maybe forgetable, but would he forget Saraquiel? Was she his superior or an equal?

It happened twice, and narrative law says things come in threes. I fully expect a third forgotten memory on the third season. My bets are on: he doesn't remember he's the one who made the stars.

However, if this is not a case of memory loss, it would be FANTASTIC character development, backwards.

We are shown a young angel who is passionate about his stars, but who doesn't care. He doesn't care about Aziraphael at the begining, he doesn't even look at him, he doesn't care about his superiors or his underlings, he doesn't care about the earth-human project everyone else is producing; he cares about his job.

Same as Muriel, sweet, human-enthusiast Muriel didn't care about the death of Job's children.

Crowley caring started when he stopped being an angel. It only started when he was forced to be parted with the only thing he cared about and look around

IF his memory issues are not a plot device.

[azpaintingltd]

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[aziraphales-library]

First of all, thank you so much for all you do! I've found so many excellent stories and authors through here ❤️

I've read several human AUs in a row where Crowley is characterized as wealthy, and I was wondering if you knew any fics where he is quite the opposite and is instead struggling with meeting his expenses or otherwise financially insecure. He's usually portrayed as flush, so it'd be interesting to see the flip side! (This doesn't have to be a human AU!)

Well, there are a few where he's struggling...

Loving You Slow by TawnyOwl95 [E], WIP

Crowley just wants to dance, but he's not prepared to sell his soul (and other things) at Mayfair's Hellfire Club to do it.

Tending bar at The Bookshop in Soho is just the escape he needs, providing Crowley can convince the club’s owner he really belongs on the stage.

Unfortunately Aziraphale Eastgate is not quite the generous guardian angel Crowley has been led to believe.

Welcome to The Bookshop, where it always pays to look under the covers.

I'm a fool to want you [G], WIP by starryfull13

Aziraphale is a well known author living in London with his sweet natured dog Perdita.

Crowley is a struggling musician running away from his past, trying to keep himself and his dog Pongo in one piece. Which is easier said than done when he isn't causing trouble and turning their lives upside down. There are better ways to go about meeting someone new than causing a scene in the park.

Hot Sugar [E], WIP by summerofspock

Fresh out of a break-up, Aziraphale wants a feelings-free arrangement to pass the time before he leaves the country for his next career opportunity at the end of the summer.

Crowley is exhausted from working three jobs for the last year, and getting paid to go to fancy parties and have good sex sounds like a pretty sweet gig. It's not like he's going to do something stupid like catch feelings for some posh bastard that's paying him for sex.

A Sugar Daddy AU.

The False and the Fair [E] by Princip1914

Growing up in the shadow of West Virginia’s Eden Mountain, Aziraphale Wright always expected to work for the family coal mining company. Anthony Crowley, the son of a down-and-out miner, was going to become a pilot and leave town forever. Now, thirty years later, neither of their lives have gone as planned, and an unexpected inheritance brings them back into one another’s orbit. Aziraphale hopes that they can move beyond their shared past, and a high school arrangement that ended in disaster, but he has secrets of his own that threaten their fragile reconnection…

~Mod N

And here are a couple more...

Common People by journeytogallifrey (E)

Aziraphale leaned in, his lips not just brushing Crowley’s ear but pressing into it, and said:

“I want to sleep with common people.”

Crowley made a strangled noise. “You – erk – ah – what?”

Aziraphale sat up, looking much too pleased with himself. “I want to sleep with common people like you.”

Aziraphale, a student from a very wealthy family, drops by the pub one day to learn about the ways of ‘common people.’ Luckily Crowley, a ‘common person’ working three jobs to make ends meet, is there to teach him. But why is Aziraphale really doing this? And does Crowley have a hope in hell of it lasting?

(Based on the song ‘Common People’ by Pulp.)

Veni Vino Vegas (I Came, I Got Drunk, I Got Married) by A_N_D (T)

After a whirlwind drunken evening, author Az Fell came home from Rom-Con without his heirloom pinkie ring – but with a wedding license from a 24-hour Las Vegas chapel. Elsewhere, book fan Tony Crowley woke up with a hangover, vague memories, and a brand new ring he’s only seen in author photos.

Mutually attracted, mutually terrified the other one thinks it was all a regrettable mistake, they turn to their dear but anonymous online friend to vent and ask for advice.

…Maybe they should tell each other their screennames someday.

Once upon a time by elf_on_the_shelf (M)

‘Hello, my dear.’

Crowley bit his lip for a couple of seconds before he took a deep breath and just went with it.

‘Would you like to go for a coffee sometime?’

There was silence at the other end.

Oh shit.

‘That was my friend messing around with my phone…?’

‘You do realise that only works over text.’

‘Myeah.’

Why was he like this? He had wanted to kill Bea for doing the same thing and yet here he was, doing the thing. At Bea’s behest, mind you.

‘I would love to go for coffee. Oh, and cake!'

-

Aziraphale is a very rich and successful writer. Crowley is at the worst possible moment of his life - living off Bee's couch and posting his mum's fairy tales on some random sites only to be ignored by everyone except one random person simply called A.

This is a story about how both of our main protagonists get over the ghosts of their pasts, learn to work together and maybe - just maybe - fall in love in the process.

Not to mention that all of the characters that we love (hate - looking at you, Gabe) make an appearance.

- Mod D

[justkeeptrekkin]

Hi M anon!! I’m so sorry this took me so long. I’ve played around with the idea a bit, hope you don’t mind. Tagging @a-shipping-life who requested something similar. Enjoy!!

***

“This is....”

Crowley’s voice trails off as he views his surroundings. When he’d imagined post-armageddon, he had always thought of fire and brimstone. Or, depending on how the war ended, sickening rounds of celestial harmonies, on repeat- listening to it all from behind bars in a pit. Instead, three years into the Third Testament, the New Era, the Age of Satan’s Spawn, and Crowley’s attending children’s birthday parties. Apparently.

The back garden of the Young family household is perfect for a party- according to Azirphale. A nice little closed off area, with some nice bunting and nice cake and a nice view of the Cotswolds rolling in the distance. Kids and family friends, together, having a nice time. All a bit too nice for Crowley’s taste, who’d preferred the bratty parties Warlock’d had, with nasty children and inappropriately dangerous presents (Nanny Ashtoreth had been the one to anonymously give Warlock a bow and arrow set).

Crowley takes his stand beside Aziraphale, wincing at the ensuing fourteenth birthday party. He needs a shot of insulin with how sweet this event is. He eventually manages: “This is. Ugh.”

“It is not ugh,” Aziraphale tuts, rolls his eyes. “Birthdays are nice.”

“Exactly. Nice is ugh.”

Aziraphale casts him a reprimanding glance, but a smile is pulling at the corners of his lips. He looks Crowley up and down judgmentally and passes him a plastic cup. “Here.”

“What’s this?”

“Punch.”

“I’m assuming not the alcoholic variety.”

“It’s a fourteenth birthday party, Crowley.”

“What? The Youngs could be more progressive than you think. What harm did a bit of vodka do a teenager. Do teenagers not drink nowadays? I find it hard to keep track.”

“Not till his sixteenth,” Aziraphale says. Eyes scanning the party with as much wariness as Crowley’s had. Adults eating cake from paper plates, teenagers sitting on the grass and sulking at how lame this is.

“I can- I can almost guarantee that lot will have had a cheeky WKD before sixteen,” Crowley mutters into the plastic cup of punch.

Their gazes find The Them, who are sat on the garden bench and on the grass, conspiring amongst themselves. And Crowley thinks that whilst a couple of them aren’t really that badly behaved, Adam has a mischievous streak about him, and the others follow suit. The Youngs are probably struggling to keep up with their teenage son. But then, better the little devil use his powers to make a fake ID to grab a six pack of Strongbow from the corner shop, than to destroy the world.

Just as he’s considering this, the four of them look up at Aziraphale and Crowley. As if they’ve been talking about them.

Crowley sighs, peering at them over the rim of his glasses. “Yep. That lot are trouble makers.”

“It- are they talking about us?”

“Looks like.”

Aziraphale pouts his lips. “Teenagers.”

For a moment, they simply stand at the periphery of the party and survey. Newt and Anathema are here, who they could probably hold some awkward conversation with (“So… world didn’t end then.” “Apparently.”), however, they’re currently occupied by some of the guests from the village. And there’s a lot of other people who’ve been invited by Mr and Mrs Young who seem to be here for their benefit rather than Adam’s.

“Why are we here again?” Crowley whines.

“Because we’re his godparents.”

Crowley wrinkles his nose, peers down at the red juice that’s calling itself punch and doesn’t have nearly enough rum in it. “Not officially.”

“You were the one who assigned us that term, remember?” Aziraphale prompts.

“Suppose.” Then, because he’s feeling brave. And he gets these bouts of bravery when he’s in Tadfield. “How’s about after this we find the nearest pub and pissed. You can crash at mine afterwards.”

There’s a moment when he looks like he’s going to argue, twisting his lips primly and casting fleeting glances at Crowley. All coy. Crowley loves every daft bit of him. “Yes. That does sound good.”

“We can wash down the niceness of this pa- uh-oh. Here they come.”

Aziraphale picks up the slice of cake that he’d laid on the table behind him. A forkful hovering just in front of his mouth. “Sorry?”

“Teenagers, twelve o’clock.”

Aziraphale reluctantly lowers the fork, puts it down on the paper plate and surveys The Approaching Them. Adam at the front. And then the others disperse- going inside to do something more interesting, Crowley supposes. Now, with just Adam, it feels less like they’re about to be ambushed. The boy looks at them with that quietly expectant look he has, and has had since he was eleven when they first met. Though he’s a few inches taller than he used to be.

Dog trots by Adam’s side, and looks up at Aziraphale, pleading silently. Aziraphale brings the plate of cake closer to his chest and narrows his eyes at Dog.

“Thanks for coming,” Adam says, though he doesn’t look massively excited.

“Are you having a nice time?” Aziraphale asks pleasantly.

Adam shrugs. “Not really. Mum and dad invited all their friends and none of mine. Apart from you two, and Anathema and Newt. And obviously Pepper and people. It would be a lot nicer if there weren’t all these annoying old people, too.”

Crowley nods in grim understanding, curls his lips in disregard for said old people.

“Oh,” is Aziraphale’s reply. Then, smile wavering, “Well, it’s nice to see at least that there are people here who care about you, no?”

“They don’t even really know me,” Adam shrugs. “They aren’t here for my birthday. They’re here for the free cake and to boast about their lovely little middle class lives. It’s the perfect opportunity for bourgeoisie posturing under the guise of a birthday party- it’s actually really shallow.”

So this is teenaged Adam. And no less, Adam as a teenager being influenced by Anathema. Aziraphale looks a bit lost for words, but Crowley’s grinning like a loon.

“Well said,” he drawls through his smirk. “Any good presents?”

“Got a Nintendo Switch.”

“Very good,” Crowley replies seriously.

“Anyway,” Adam sighs, “The others have gone inside to find lactose free snacks. I should go help.Brian’s lactose intolerant now.”

“Oh, what a shame,” Aziraphale says sincerely.

“See you later.”

Adam traipses inside, and Dog follows chirpily. Aziraphale and Crowley watch them disappear.

“He’s going to be…” Aziraphale shakes his head, exhales through pursed lips.

“Ball-buster, that one.”

“Yes.”

Some very nondescript music plays distantly. It looks as if Mr Young is attempting to hook up his phone to bluetooth speakers and is struggling, crouching on all fours to inspect the wiring. There isn’t any wiring, is the problem. It’s a wireless speaker system. But that doesn’t seem to have occurred to Mr Young- bum in the air and face buried in Apple technology.

“Oh- oh bother. Why am I like this?”

Crowley turns to see Aziraphale has dropped cake down his waistcoat. He’s holding out the offending plate of cake and frowning at the mess- multi-coloured frosting and sprinkles everywhere. Dog is absolutely delighted, eating the scraps by Aziraphale’s feet.

Aziraphale gives Crowley his sad, cherub eyes. Crowley looks back, pouts his bottom lip. Oh, diddums.

“Would you…?” Aziraphale asks. Looking at him through his lashes.

He gives it a long moment- gives Aziraphale a few seconds to enjoy himself, gives Aziraphale the impression that he needs to work to convince Crowley. He doesn’t.

Crowley snaps his fingers, cake gone. More than that, he turns to fetch him another slice.

And he makes that little flustered smile. The one that makes Crowley putty in his stupid angelic hands. “Oh, thank you.”

“Alright, alright,” Crowley waves a dismissive hand over his shoulder as he goes to get more cake.

There’s the cake- half of it left, at least eight slices. There’s the stack of paper plates. He looks up- no one around. He takes a slice as quickly as he can, not wanting to be cornered by any of the horrifically boring guests.

Then:

“Can I ask you a question?”

Crowley spins round to find Adam. Oh, that’s fine. Adam’s not a boring octogenarian. “Questions? Love questions. Shoot.”

“None of the others believe me,” Adam starts, hands in his pockets, expression as cool and collected as ever. “I’m pretty convinced, but it seems rude to tell them I know when I haven’t even asked.”

“Asked what?”

He’s busying himself with cutting a slice of cake, paying attention but not feeling the need to give Adam his undivided attention. That is until:

“You two are married. Aren’t you?”

A perfect slice of cake had been balanced on the knife in Crowley’s hand. And then Adam had said that. So now, he’s got a perfect slice of cake splattered all over the table. And Adam’s got a speechless demon, steaming from the ears. Literally, steaming from the ears.

“Wh-wh-wh-wh-wh-”

“So,” Adam’s eyes widen a little, and he nods slowly. “You’re… not. Married.”

“I’m- you’re- what? Who- why’re- listen,” he says, pointing a paper plate at the son of Satan, “You have no- what did- did he? Where did-”

This could take forever, and they both know it. Crowley’s mouth is a broken record. His brain has disconnected itself entirely from the rest of his body. For a demon who can speak multiple languages, who can speak tongues, he can’t for the life of him speak any of them well. Thus, Adam makes the executive decision of saving him from this never-ending, hellish loop of inarticulacy.

“Sorry for making it weird,” he says, not looking that sorry, “The two of you are just so obviously in love, I figured you guys were married. And gay marriage was only legalised recently, cause, like, homophobia and stuff. So I figured that you didn’t have rings because- are you OK? There’s smoke.”

“What?”

“There’s smoke. Coming from your head.”

Right, so he’s progressed straight from steaming from the ears to smoking. Fantastic, perfect, excellent. It’s probably from the speed that his thoughts are spinning; his brain going so fast, so out of control that it’s generated enough mental friction to cause a fire. Thoughts like-

-me and Aziraphale married a wedding what would we wear where would we live would we live together perhaps we’d have a garden and I could cook for him and he could knit me socks like the socks he gave me for Christmas two years ago and oh holy fuck is it that obvious that I love him does he realise does Aziraphale know does he love me back he loves me he loves me not he loves me he loves me not he loves me-

-OK, he can smell the smoke now. Just wonderful.

Then, from across the garden, Crowley hears Aziraphale exclaim: “Married?”

Pepper is staring at him like he’s an idiot. Aziraphale’s staring back at her like he’s gone catatonic. Holding an empty paper plate. Mouth hanging open. Eyes widening slowly, like the THX theme music should be playing in the background.

And then Aziraphale’s head snaps round to look at Crowley. Looking, as far as he can tell, absolutely mortified.

Crowley stares back.

Adam stares.

Pepper stares.

Crowley puts down the cake knife and takes a deep, nerve-steadying breath. Because whilst the world hadn’t really ended three years ago, it feels a bit like it has now.

Time to face the music, he thinks.

***

Part two possibly will be written if people want one...

[cicaklah]

Okay I gotta ask about 'contractually obligated to write good omens fic'

Excellent because I’m very unlikely to ever finish it. This is based on an Actual Afternoon I Had with a good friend, the pub, the cheese plate, the polish barman with the salacious wink are all real, as is the memorial to war animals I lost my shit over. Sadly I didn’t know what I wanted to do with it. 

I’m EXTREMELY old school GO fan, and didn’t really enjoy the series as much as I hoped I would, so I was going for more book vibe? idk. 

Oh wait there's also this bit which sums up why this never got finished:

Me: I should write a GO fic about the bits of London I know and love

Me: Proceeds to write fic about bit of London I barely have been to.

The thing about London is that there is always a new pub, even if that pub has been there for four hundred years. That pub is new to you, therefore it is a new pub. In the case of The Running Horse, just up from Claridges, it was new to Crowley. 

Aziraphale had recommended they meet there. “Fancy something a bit different hmm? I remember it being good. Went recently I think” he said. “Useful for a glass or two before the hangings.”

“They stopped hanging people at Tyburn two hundred years ago, angel,'' Crowley said.

It was a very nice pub though.The barman, handsome and Polish, handed him a generous, non regulation glass of whisky, and winked in a way that made Crowley think that the young man must have satanic heritage.*

*Satanic nuns always broke their vows, that was part of the job. Crowley himself had once wiled away a pleasant afternoon with an infernal sister, but ultimately, it didn’t really count as a temptation, and so felt like cheating on his diet.

He ordered the cheese plate, a good bottle of Champagne (that he didn’t even have to curse into oblivion), and waited for his heavenly partner.

Three hours later, an angel and a demon are staggering down Upper Brook Street and the gold plaques that indicate the better class of money launderer, and sloped semi-newtonianly towards Hyde Park. Aziraphale is talking about frogs, and frog spawn. Crowley says something about the French, because it is important to keep up appearances when currently (and seemingly eternally) British. You never know when someone will be watching. 

They cross the road, sloshing as they go. The sunlight is golden, long summer evenings just as magical as they always are.

“THEY HAD NO CHOICE” the memorial read. The noble animals, carved in marble, gaze into the middle distance.