#refer here if you want to know which shows you can ramble about with me

[nugulover69]

Toku Watch List

Sentai

Completed:

Jetman

Gokaiger

Carranger

Go-onger

Gekiranger

Gaoranger

Liveman

Kingohger

Zyuohger

Currently watching:

Boonboomger

Go-Busters

Intended for future viewing:

Turboranger

Ninninger

Kakuranger

Timeranger

Boukenger

Goseiger

ToQger

Donbrothers

Dekaranger

Hurricanger

Shinkenger

Zenkaiger

Kamen Rider

Completed:

Ryuki

Faiz

Ex-Aid

Kabuto

OOO

Kiva

Intended for future viewing:

Blade

Wizard

Build

Fourze

[neoanedotheart]

Lazy thing i wanted to do!!! they're just silly :3

I think dave is a pretty princess and John is awkward

I'll be yapping below

I believe that Dave texts John right after he gets his ass handed to him DAILY. It usually plays out like this where they banter and Dave never really goes through the extent of explaining what thoroughly happens to him so John lives in forever ignorant bliss. And this leads Dave to feel like there's more of disconnect because he first of all doesn't really know how to articulate his feelings and second abuse doesn't seem like abuse to the victim. So he goes about everyday unknowingly yearning to be saved by someone greater than him, which is why I put the snow white reference at the end hehe.

Snow white as a fairy tale is extremely cliche, you got the prince in shining armor showing up conveniently on a horse and saving the girl. There's always this hierarchy placed upon the story where the damsel in distress is saved by a man, that man being portrayed as a greater being.

And with John taking place as the prince in this context paints him as this greater being. And I feel like a part of Dave envies and despises John for being this way, for being "perfect" or in a way. Greater than him.

The thing is in the original snow white story she's unconscious, that's undesirable. But it adds to the desperation of wanting to be saved, shining a better looking light on a person who isn't really there for reasons you want them to be. However John is a sincere person, it's more so the lack of communication or true understanding of one another that leads to this rift, this belief that John isn't there for Dave because he loves him, but because he's his friend and it's John's duty as a friend to save him. Which also brings me to the last line where Dave never corrects himself, and how he insinuates that he'll be unconscious due to being placed in a glass coffin much like snow white was when she was poisoned. He's at this stage where he doesn't want to be saved by an outer source, a greater person than him. He wants to be saved by himself he wants to prove worthy, but then conflicting within his mind is also this idea he isn't good enough to. We all know that Dave believes he isn't a hero and explicitly states John is the hero multiple times throughout homestuck. So he stays waiting.

John however, refers to Dave as Cinderella, Cinderella gets abused and put through plenty of torture from her step sisters and is saved through marriage of some person she just met. There's still this base line of being saved by man however there's this more mutual understanding of what they're getting into, a similar yearn for one another. Though he never caught her name he was still willing to find her, the real her. Which is John in this case, he probably understands he's missing something in the big picture but can never find out what and the best he can do is hope that the other half still held on to what they once were and was willing to share.

This is a pre-sburb interaction btw they're just unknowingly foreshadowing a shit ton.

Sorry if there's like bad shitty writing in here, I'm rambling and it's like almost midnight hehe

[auriidae]

LIFESTUCK ?!?! (pt 2 here!) (pt 3)

i was sick a couple days ago and spent like 12 hours straight doing nothing but classpecting life series characters and then was like Yeah i have to draw this now. so here's some sillies 👍 (super long classpect ramble under cut because i spent far too long on it not to share hfshjf)

quick note: i really really love @/classpect-navelgazing's theories and used them for a lot of the ideas here. go check their blog out it rules :]

ok you guys flower ranchers (scott tango jimmy) are making me so insane for this au specifically because of this idea i had about doom/life players. doom in true canon is related to inevitability, fate, and knowledge of the specific rules that keep the characters trapped within their story, right. and life is sort of related to healing, physically and mentally, within the confines of the game. so within this au, the aspect of life refers to the rules within the game that the players can see and are aware of (last life’s trading lives system + boogeyman, third life’s soulmate mechanic, secret life’s tasks, etc.). life players have some amount of dominion over these elements (depending on their class, of course). doom on the other hand refers to everything surrounding the games (stuff like admin powers, the world barrier, and whatever happens to the players after they die). 

as a mage of doom, scot (his name is so funny to me. like yeah he sure is) has a bunch of intrinsic knowledge about the way the games function on a logistical level. he’s like a guy who read the script a while ago and forgot all the characters’ names but knows the basic plot and how it’s going to end. or who knows all the ins and outs of tech crew and for whom the apparent magic of the show for the audience is lost on, since he knows how it’s being done. the thing is, scot isn't especially able to act on this knowledge during the game. what director wants someone in the audience — or one of the actors — taking all the magic out of the show, spoiling how it works and how it ends? no, it’s best if they keep that knowledge to themselves — and so scot’s narratively unable to affect the stories of those around him, even his close friends who he’d want to help. he’s aware of this, of course, which makes him more than a little depressed, as he can see the futility of it all and can’t even explain to anyone what’s going on and how the game works. (the only story he’s able to affect, of course, is his own. which. depressed doom player + mage martyr complex + guy who Really cares about his friends is not necessarily a good combination.)

the amount of stock i put in the idea of gendered classes is close to zero so tangoe gets to be a maid of life because ohh my goodness. i like the theory (thanks classpect-navelgazing) of life as “the aspect of affluence,” where life players usually enter the game with some kind of material wealth or status that helps their position in some way. i also like the idea that maid players start the game with a surplus of their aspect but often end up feeling as if they’re only seen as a provider of that specific thing as a result of this, and so end up longing for something else instead. this primarily applies to last life tango because that’s the season i’m most familiar with lol, but i thought the way he started out with so many lives there and quickly dwindled as a result of everyone taking from him and only him was Really interesting. mans has all the luck of the game he could need, but only wants friends to actually be able to live with. being a life player also ties into his little gambling games and things (again, dominion over stuff within the overarching game/story, but nothing beyond that).

then we get to jimi (again fantastic name). the basic premise of an heir is that they’re played by their aspect, right and Oh Boy is jimmy played by life in the life series. i don’t personally know much about anything he’s done other than heehoo canary guy but along with the previously stated points it’s So fun to see him as a life player because it allows for some really clearly contrast between the way he interacts with tangoe and scot based on their aspects. i really like the idea of scot being like “you’re a life player jimi. it's in your name. the game is not going to let you die” and jimi like “you really think so? aw thanks man” neither of them knowing that dying as a life player in this game is literally like in the job description. (ok. i kind of feel like i’m letting jimi down by basing his story so far around other people.. but this is just for fun and i can always change it later)

(also i could easily have put tangoe and jimi as doom players too but for the fact that i don’t think they necessarily see through the game as much as scot does (or at all). and so life it is.)

feel free to ask me questions abt them!!! i have so many thoughts about this bro 

[electronix-arts]

i have the urge to ramble so why not ramble about murder drones

i have many fears over episode 8, my biggest one being is that everyone is going to fucking die, and since im now considered the khan guy, why not talk about him (THIS IS SO LONG HOLY FUCKING SHIT)

ok so funnily enough, im prepared if he does drop dead in ep 8. people have teased me going “oh lol what if khan dies in ep 8” but little do you all know ive been prepared since ep 7 dropped, my wife has improved so much he’s bound to be sniped by liam. i’d be upset as hell and act like a wife who lost her husband at sea but i would not be too surprised if he is killed off

before it was confirmed ep 8 is the series finale, i was a s2 believer and i held onto hope that they wouldn’t kill khan because it’d make his character feel worthless. you see this man improve so much to be a better father to uzi and grow a pair to actually do something; to me, him dying would have made all of that useless, the hypothetical season 2 could have grown his character more if he lived, hell, maybe even show flashbacks of him during his ‘kill all humans’ phase. ep 7 shows khan has nowhere to go but up (or go insane, like the ep 8 teaser showed us)

but since season 2 is not real, i have to accept the fact that yeah, khan might die. so instead of being upset over that, why not speculate how he’ll fuckin die even though him being in the teaser looking batshit insane makes me think he’ll be a survivor. look at him. he will live off of pure adrenaline. anyways.

it’d 100% be a sacrifice, his apology for everything he’s done (which i fucking HATE i wanted him to grow more to become more redeemable to others not [death = hooray your sins are mostly forgiven] but i just gotta suck it up for now)

it’d definitely be for uzi or nori, make sense if he sacrificed himself for both of them [“Turns out, I’m not who either of you needed”] buuut i think it’d be more uzi focused. he was the one who raised her for the entirety of her life, actually tried to become better and changed his main focus to her and tried to help whenever he could after that, he would take a hypothetical bullet for her. it could even parallel to pilot when he left her for dead, now he’s the one dying and telling uzi to leave him so she can save herself and the others (it could even reference heartbeat where she thought he actually died, i don’t know how they’d do it, but yeah. i like that scene in heartbeat, i enjoy characters i love oh so much in severe pain.)

while i like this a lot, i would want khan to sacrifice himself for someone else more than his own wife and daughter. shocking, i know. i make my entire personality based off these idiots why wouldn’t i want a doorman family reuni-

n. if khan dies in ep 8, i want him to die sacrificing himself for n. i want n to be in horror at what has happened as khan is slowly dying in front of him, basically giving n his blessing to date uzi even though the entire planet is doomed.

it parallels nori’s disapproval of the relationship, shows that khan’s views on the dds (mainly n) have changed [killing machine -> bad influence on uzi -> someone who genuinely cares for her, someone who she needed] -and i guess nicely ties up the gift that is his redemption arc.

it makes sense for him to give said blessing, he’s seen how close uzi has gotten with n as well I’m pretty sure when he reunites with nori (plsplspls) after they calm down she’s definitely gonna be like “YOU LET OUR DAUGHTER “HANG OUT” WITH THE THINGS YOU SAW KILL ME” so that’d be fresh on his mind when he hypothetically drops dead.

also i’d feel like him sacrificing himself for uzi is like. too perfect or easily guessable, maybe they could hint “oh yeah khan’s def gonna die to save uzi & nori” when haha sike he’s dying to save the future son-in-law (if there is a future)

anyways that’s it. im bad at wrapping up things so here is what i call my conclusion. if you actually read this i love you so much you will be in my will

[kayesfanfics]

General Striker x Reader Headcanons

He hates too much PDA, only likes it when he’s either jealous or showing you off. Otherwise, refrain from kissing and hugging and all that lovey dovey crap, save it for when the both of you are in private. He’s got a bad boy reputation to hold up, and yes he likes to flaunt you but he doesn’t want to be too affectionate and have people realize you’re a weakness of his, especially with he people he works and deals with

He calls you stuff like darlin, pumpkin, sugar, doll face, sweetheart. You call him cowboy, stud, Casanova, babe, and you save daddy for when you want something cause you can NOT tell me Striker doesn’t refer to himself as daddy in the bedroom I’m sorry-

He really likes showing off for you, showcasing his strength, smooth singing voice, rugged good looks, everything. Will do some hard work for you like any repairs around the house, carrying heavy stuff for you, anything like that. Will cook for you as well, he’s really good at barbecue and def makes the best barbecue sauce you’ve ever tasted, and he’ll proudly smile when you dig into his food. Will sing for you if you ask him enough, yes he’s confident but with you he can be a little bashful since he actually wants you to like him. He’s secretly a big sap though and has probably written a song or two about/for you

Whenever you want to go out, he doesn’t have a ton of money to go crazy but he tries his best to find a less sleazy place where it’s less likely for creeps to hit on you and make you uncomfortable. Def the type to fight you on who pays the bill, and it’s often settled with you agreeing to pay for your own stuff, but then Striker will intercept the waiter and give him the cash to cover the both of you. You know he’s not exactly rich himself so you never expected any big fancy thing from him, but when you have date nights in he’ll make you a really nice candlelit dinner and blush a little when you call him a lover boy

But whenever the two of you do go to bars, he gets pretty protective cause he knows the kind of shit that washes up in these places. He knows you can handle yourself and have been for years before you met him, but he’s here now so he can help you out. So if the bartender gets a little too flirty or another customer gets a little too close to you, you hear the rattle and hiss from Striker as he glared at the person as a warning to back off. If the person doesn’t listen or dares to even lay a single finger on you, he WILL start a bar fight and get kicked out for you, he does NOT like anyone touching what’s his or making you feel uncomfortable and unsafe

You do go days, sometimes weeks without seeing him due to his work, but he’ll call you on his burner phone when he’s free to check in with you. You’re not allowed to call him and don’t ever have his numbers to his phone, just in case because he could get caught or something. Which is fine, cause he always calls you in the evening when he’s winding down for the day to say hi and make sure you’re okay. He’ll listen to you ramble about your day, and sometimes he’ll fall asleep on the phone with you, listening to your voice and you smile when you realize he’s asleep before saying goodnight and hanging up

When he comes home all roughed up, you scold him as you grab the first aid kit, which is often kept out now rather than tucked away under the bathroom sink. He rants about how a guy named Blitz and his other imps keeps beating him, but you could honestly care less as you tend to his wounds for him. He’s extra grumpy but you kiss him on the cheek and he softens up a bit, accepting your offer to head to bed early and cuddle a bit. He’s definitely a cuddler once he softens up with you, loves to have you in his arms and sometimes even lets you hold him instead if he’s in the mood for it. And after a beat down, he wants nothing more than to lay on your chest and let you play with his hair or rub his back as he groans from his sore body

CAMPING DATES. He’s already got all the stuff to spend nights out in the desert for his job, so it doesn’t cost him more money and it’s just the two of you. You’ll both ride Bombproof out into the middle of nowhere with nobody around for miles, setting up a fire and lying against his horse to look up at the sky. He’ll give you his jacket when you get cold, claiming he’s just fine but he’s trying not to shiver so you don’t feel bad. Or you can both cuddle up in a blanket, your head on his shoulder as the two of you chat while he roasts some food for the both of you over the fire, giving the leftover scraps to Bombproof

[evereverest2]

Little Monster Q&A + author fun facts !!

hello new followers and fans of Little Monster. first of all, i just have to thank everyone for the crazy support ive been getting as of late. thank you everyone. every like, comment, and reblog just pushes me to keep writing, even when it feels like every word i write is garbage.

so i decided to make this little special! idk if anyone will be super interested, so ill put all the stuff under the cut, but i also wanted to add this little drawing i did of terzomega as like extra content. if you arent interested, thanks anyway and enjoy the art!

—

to everyone who stayed, i have no idea why you’re interested, but thanks lmfao. this shit will be long.

Questions

Is your most recent oneshot about the mirror related at all to Little Monster? (from @ofthemorningstars)

i'm glad you noticed that !! in The Mirror, i very purposefully left two hints at the end of the fic to indicate its connection to Little Monster, which was the taco ring reference and Terzo's use of "mostriciatto". to me, mostriciatto will always be the Little Monster version of terzomega. no matter when i finish that fic or if i write more fics after, i will never again use mostriciatto unless im purposefully writing these versions of terzomega. i havent seen anyone else use it (i hope they dont), so i like to imagine this can be forever my impact on terzomega fics lmao. anyway, the purpose of me leaving those references isnt necessarily to say, "this is a future scene of little monster" bc it isnt exactly that (while i have plans that line up with this oneshot, i cannot anticipate that everything will fit perfectly by the time we get there in the canon). the purpose of doing that was to show u cuties that yes, terzo and omega will eventually have a better relationship, and i will be extending this timeline into papa terzo era. just a fun little teaser for my more observant fans.

also, fun fact about how i came up with that pet name. i was writing the first part of Little Monster (that part is now titled Spilled Wine as featured on my Ao3) and i knew i wanted to give terzo an affinity for using pet names, but i didn't know quite which ones to use. i didn't want to be boring, so i googled some. i have no idea where, but i found mostriciatto, meaning, of course, "little monster." i had yet to even really start writing it, but i knew i wanted it to be DARK with a very unhinged omega, so i thought, perfect. ill talk a bit more about the writing of part one later on

2. How many parts do you currently anticipate writing? Do you have a set ending point, or will this perhaps be an ongoing project for the foreseeable future? (from @ofthemorningstars)

i have 12 major plot points (including the first five parts i have written) that loosely translate into parts. this could mean 12 parts, or it could be more depending on what i write. i kinda plan on expanding this to 18 (6 parts per “era” or “act” [you’ll see what i mean]) though i dont quite have a set ending yet, so really its up in the air. i am, however, planning on having a definitive ending, ergo not an endless project. from there there may be some oneshots in this universe, but they will have an ending.

3. In the first part of little monster you put a disclaimer with something along the lines of "if you're expecting comfort I'm sorry to disappoint". The angst is MWAH but do you like plan on giving Terzo like any sort of comfort or happiness?? (from @puuuders)

before i begin rambling, here's your answer: there will be hope and good times as mentioned above, and you might have even picked up on that in part 5. i may have wrote a fucked up versions of terzomega but whats a good story without character growth?? i havent determined the direction of the ending, but rest assured, if it all burns down, they will hold each other close (for the minute it takes).

but also.... funny story about that disclaimer....

soo i wanted to write ghost fanfic to impress my friend who is a VERY avid member of this community. however, i failed to realize they DO NOT like angst without love and care and fluff, so after i showed it to them, buddy did not like it. i took that as a sign that maybe this shit was a little TOO dark.

but my god, i could not stop thinking about it, as the caption said, and i dont always feel that away about what i write. i had recently started to post semi often to tumblr, and i just thought. well, theres gotta be someone else as fucked up as me, and i posted that shit. that disclaimer was a result of taking my friends reaction seriously and realizing that i needed to make it VERY clear that this fic is NOT for everyone. there was a different og caption that was longer and more grave, but i cut it down for aesthetics bc little monster has already seen more success than i ever anticipated.

4. What is your favorite ghost album, and what song introduced you to ghost? (from @puuuders) & Favorite ghost song (or songs) (from @ask-enso-ghoul)

my favorite album is Infestissumam!!! the vibes of the album are so fucking immaculate, even if terzo is my favorite papa.

of course, of course, the first song i ever heard from ghost was Mary on a Cross. it blew up when it did and i loved it. the second song that really made me start getting into ghsot was square hammer, which will secretly also be my favorite ghost song but ive heard it so many times i have to give it now to the future is a foreign land. some of my other fave songs are jigolo, respite, body and blood, faith, twenties, and year zero (there’s just so many)

i want to take a second to say my least favorite album though, which is opus eponymous, or as i call it, pope pussy. it’s ok. it’s just ok. mk. i’m not a fan of that sound. the best song on there is genesis. I FUCKING SAID IT—

5. how do you get into the zone of writing smut-? I’m trying to get into it but it sounds cheesy when I do, so do you do something specific? (from anon)

im gonna level with you. i have been writing for almost a decade, since i was 12, and the first thing i started writing was smut. sex has always been a HUGE creative force for my writing and art in general. as stupid as it sounds, writing smut to me is more than just that. its my art. its my greatest and most inspirational subject. i love being creative with it, bending it to the niches and intricacies of the duo im writing, just playing with it as a medium of expression, of storytelling, of how DEEP it can be.

that being said, one of the easiest ways to get into the zone of smut specifically is being horny ! you imagine your pairing doing some illicit bedroom activity and you pick them up liek dolls and smush their faces together ! let it be fun, and let it be yours. dont write it to please the kinks of your audience, write it to your own taste and enjoyment.

as far as it being cheesy, yeah, it will feel that way. the most important thing is to be confident with your language and don’t shy away from calling a dick a dick, a pussy a pussy, an ass an ass. it feels stupid, but it will read worse if you make up artsy names for them every other line. don’t be afraid to be descriptive either, because that’s what the people want to see, trust me.

apologies if that was unhelpful, ive just been writing smut so long i can hardly tell you how i do it. im jsut super passionate about it and it fuels me creatively….. can u tell lol

6. Favorite work you’ve ever done? (from anon)

so.... ive written many things and that depends. its definitely not anything ive posted on here.

i think my favorite "serious" work is a short story i wrote for a creative writing class, called Abel and Sally. it was an modern inversion of the bible story of abraham and sarah, with a really dark ending (i love to shit on catholicism)

the other work that comes to mind is the first story i wrote about my oc anson, called Anson's Prison. that is something i would potentially post on here, its pretty short but its a good one. its oc content, tho, so i doubt many ppl would be interested lel.

8. will you draw more drawing for your stories in the future? (from anon)

well. heres my thing with art.

ive been drawing as long as ive been writing. but im not an artist; i never learned ANYTHING beyond like drawing itself, i.e. i dont know how to shade, pick colors, do bgs, etc. (can u tell??? do u see that art up there???? can YOU TELL??) thus, i have a sort of love hate relationship with drawing, and i usually dont like my own stuff. i didnt pick up drawing as easy as i did writing and its not nearly as intuitive to me.

that being said, it is sometimes fun when the drawings turn out just right and i get super passionate about something i draw and i can create the image in my head. so if the mood strikes me, i probably will draw more terzomega stuff in the future.

but why do i need to?? @puuuders feeds you all SO WELL with little monster stuff you dont need my shitty art lmfao

9. MILK OR CEREAL FIRST? (from @raysoleil)

cereal. bc the moment the milk hits that cereal u are on a speedy ass countdown to devour that shit before it gets soggy, and brother, u better eat quick.

Things I wanted to share

Little Monster was supposed to be a one shot

so, Little Monster started as one thing and turned to something else entirely. originally, i wrote the beginning of the first chapter (where they are flirting in the church) in about april of this year. in this version, they were supposed to already be in love, though hiding it, and terzo was not drunk at all, just teasing. i eventually scrapped it because i wasnt very passionate about it and got p bored. then, in july, i had the itch to write something dark, but none of my projects at the time had characters i could really write that with. i came back to that scrapped fic and i thought, damn, i could really fuck these guys up, and i did.

little monster immediately became more successful than i thought it would be, and that was only about 10 notes and a comment in. i was happy to leave it at that, but then, i just started writing part two on a whim. if you look at the og post in the comments, i mention that im writing a "follow up". thats bc even when writing part two, this was not going to be a series !! but then, as i kept writing, part two became so long i had to split it in half, meaning there were suddenly 3. by the time i posted part three, though, i was shocked at the sheer amount of attention i was getting. at the same time, part three ended in such a way that i knew this story needed to keep going, to give these two a resolution. now, little monster will be a full fledged story thanks to all the support ive received :3

2. im an english major

yeah, you got me, im a college student majoring in english creative writing. is it obvious? my penultimate goal is to one day be a published author. it’s crazy surreal to me how much people express to me how they enjoy my writing~~ i hope i can one day make my dream come true 🥰 the unfortunate part about this is i go back to college next week and im uncertain how that will affect my writing schedule :p i’ll stick to weekly uploads for little monster tho dw !!

3. this is the first time i’ve written fanfic in several years

when i first started writing it was frerard and peterick fanfics on wattpad in middle school (huge shoutout to the ones that know lmfao). i stopped writing those before hs and haven’t written fanfic since. i think it’s very funny that i have come full circle back to writing band fanfic, altho ghost ofc is way more intricate with its canon

4. I LOVE YOU GUYS

i know i’ve said it a dozen times already on this post, but god it’s crazy. it’s nuts !! i’ve already made a handful of super sweet mutuals who i appreciate with all my heart, and even if you’re just a lurker, I STILL APPRECIATE YOU. EVERY SINGLE NOTE MAKES ME SO HAPPY. EVERY COMMENT AND RB HAS ME BURSTING WITH JOY.

it is entirely thanks to you all that i write terzomega and ive become so passionate about it. if it weren’t for your support, i would probably still be writing my silly little stories that no one but me could possibly understand, rotting away and wondering if anyone would even like my writing. terzo and omega are such a unique pairing compared to what ive written before, and writing them is a really cool feeling. i truly love it, and i hope i can continue to feed this side of the fandom for a long time.

from the bottom of my heart and with all my writing soul, thank you. i want to keep writing for u guys, and i want to satiate ur dirty terzomega fantasies >:) this is such a sweet and inclusive fandom and im glad i’ve been welcomed in so quickly. i hope i can continue to grow my talent here :3

ok that’s it bye teehee

[roo-bastmoon]

IMPORTANT INFO: issues around Jimin’s album

I have an ARMY friend (who shall remain safely anonymous) who works in film production for the music and entertainment industry here in the US. They offered me some valuable insights today into production limitations and possible issues related to Jimin’s solo album.

Below the cut is a transcript of their messages to me. I share this in the hopes it better informs our discussions around fair treatment of BTS members’ releases. It is by no means a definitive account of Jimin’s situation—simply an insider’s ideas on what likely happened around a few things.

I understand there are very big feelings about this topic, especially with the apparent differences around JK’s single, and I appreciate everyone’s viewpoints. However, if you choose to interact with this post, you will be respectful to others (including members) or you will be blocked. You are always welcome to DM me privately if you need to vent—we are all human and we all need a bit of grace, so you’ll always have that with me.

Sending you guys so much love, Roo

Anonymous Insider

Some “light reading” while you’re resting up and recovering, lol. This is all just based on what I’ve been watching and seen. Of course, I don’t have access to their production budget sheet and Korea works very differently than the US when it comes to production, but this what I’ve been seeing when it comes to their videos and particularly the promotions for FACE.

(I’m sending in sections, lol)

Alrighty - I’m still like deep in edit-land (still am two days later 😭) but I started typing this on the train between meetings, ha ha. (And am still on the train doing this, lol.) Also this rambles a bit I’m sorry! So the first thing I did was go back to the interview where Jimin talked about the music videos — it was a Japanese TV show and he’s talking with a host in Korean.

He’s talking about “wanting to do it all,” laughs and says, “I wanted all the music videos” and that “they” (the company assuming) said “무리다” which has its roots in the word 무리 which means a herd, a party, a group — basically “it’s too much,” “it’s unreasonable,” and “it’s impossible” are decent translations as it refers to something or an idea being “too much” — then the host and Jimin burst out laughing and the host goes “서리와 무리다” which I read as “sorry (in konglish) but we can’t” and they continue to laugh. So based on that —it sounds very understandable.

We can imagine Jimin sitting down with his team and planning out SMFP2 and LC videos, with the 30 dancers and all the party scene extras, and then Jimin saying he wants to do the music shows with 6 different sets in rented locations so they could have total control. And if Jimin in that process went “what if we made official music videos for all of them?” the team would understandably go “that’s just not reasonable!” 1) because it would give Jimin a budget no other member had gotten and 2) there aren’t that many production houses in Korea. It’s a very small scene — it may just logistically not been possible. There aren’t enough DPs and crew and editors. Sometimes, as a producer, you have to tell your creative talent “I’m sorry, but no.” — I say it every week!

So what about the music videos? Well, here’s what I know from meticulously watching all the behind the scenes for BTS videos over the years. They work with a small team. They likely own a good deal of the gear — they shoot mainly on RED cameras and heavy expensive Cooke lenses (which you can’t get this stuff easily in Korea. I lost a lens cap for a Canon CINÉ Lens in Seoul and it was like this whole big deal because getting gear there is an import challenge but anyways) they use MOVI and Ronin gimbal stabilizers and Jimmy Rigs a lot.

Recently they’ve been using technocranes but I wonder how many technocranes there are in Seoul. As I said, they likely own a lot of this gear which can help with costs. But we’ve also been told — and I’ve heard through my industry friends — that Hybe PAYS. And in Korea there’s no unions in the entertainment world, and often the rates are shit (hence Netflix investing so much there - blerg) their standard work week is also already 12 hours longer than the US. It’s a whole thing. and they spend so much money on sets. It’s incredible.

They rent these huge spaces outside Seoul and BUILD — I mean the build out for SMFP2 was astounding. They easily dropped 1million on that video. The rigging, the build-out, the custom set and the custom camera rigs to achieve the 360 shots - the drone shots. They’re astounding videos. No US label is spending that money on videos these day. Absolutely none of them are — my friend recently produced a video for John Legend. They were trying to pull the whole thing off for $100K which is ridiculous. It’s really almost impossible.  

But on the Big videos they spend a lot of money, but they also produce a lot of other stuff too (and these are often looked at as Performance Videos vs all-caps MUSIC VIDEOS) -— like RM’s video shoot at DIA Beacon… that was a much smaller, fairly single camera shoot — all shot on drones or a MOVI handheld rig. No set, they also didn’t like pay for the set because DIA: Beacon is an art museum — and similar a little bit to Letter for Jimin, which was much smaller set and easy in-house gear.

(And it was also released on Bangtan TV channel vs Hybe Labels Channel, which is a good indicator of how they categorize these shoots.) But the big videos, they go for broke. I mean they spend so much money and again they may own a lot of the equipment but there’s still so much people-power and labor involved. Take the dancers’ rehearsals. You have to pay people for all that — you have to pay them for the weeks of rehearsal, you have to pay them to be in a video. It is so expensive — like, I would not be able to budget that video for under 1 million, that’s how much it costs.  

So then Jimin wanted to do music shows —- and so because he’s Jimin and it’s BTS, Hybe rented larger venues and locations for all of the shoots. None of them use the actual Broadcast spaces or were provided by the broadcast studios. The smaller companies do though — remember when BTS first started out they went to SBS to film on the day? — but they don’t do that anymore. They rent huge facilities so that they could be a mini concerts for ARMYs to visit with Jimin and see him.

They also have to do this kind of outside of the city and they built huge sets because they’re going to want to show off if they’re gonna be on TV but that is so expensive. (I don’t think you were an ARMY then, but when ON was released, at the time it was the “biggest broadcast performance ever” and they keep upping that ante for sure!) It’s possible the broadcast companies spend some money but what BTS is doing is so outside the usual budget and given the tension with the broadcasters and HYBE — they (Hybe) wants control of their products, and so I think they pay for that control.

I can’t imagine they got out of any of those days for under $500K; I mean, there were two different sets, all the crew; they’re paying for all of it. We add it up and they probably spent close to $3-5 million between Jimin’s music videos and his music show performances, and I would be understandably like: “That’s it!” Like, that’s the budget for an EP, you know.

I don’t think Jimin could have it all because that wasn’t the case for the other members. RM got to lead videos and J Hope had pyrotechnics, which definitely costs money and safety and insurance. You know he had visual effects his first video (a lotta visual effects) and again a lot of challenging technocrane work, but I haven’t really seen them build something on the scale of what they built for SMFP2 in a very long time (or ever?).

We heard from the Art Dept that Jimin did not want to shoot on blue screen, so they built the set for him. This cannot be the same label that is shafting him — that allows him to spend that amount of money just because the artist said “I want to shoot in a real space!” because I’m gonna be completely honest— he could’ve done that on a blue screen — I’m glad they built a real world because BTS almost always shoots on Blue/Green Screen. They build him a huge set like that. It’s absolutely incredible.

I was also reminded this morning that people are talking about radio for Like Crazy and not supporting the song — and I just keep thinking that they did exact rollout for Butter, Dynamite, and Permission to Dance. They released Like Crazy. It had both a Korean version and English version. (Obviously that wasn’t the case for the English BTS songs.) They released two additional remixes. Then they kept releasing, like, alternate cover versions — alternate covers of the main remix, alternate cover the other remix. They were trying to maximize the direct-to-consumer store and exact same way they had tried to maximize it with Dynamite and Butter and Permission to Dance.

The way you were buying Like Crazy was the same process I took on Dynamite. They did the exact same playbook. So the fact that they were unable to get the kind of radio play they wanted or maybe they weren’t prioritizing radio because they knew that they were gonna have a better chance at direct to consumer sales... Maybe they didn’t want to fight radio. Maybe Geffen was like “We don’t have the right ‘Ins’ yet!” — I’m not sure, but the fact that they got completely screwed over by Billboard doesn’t mean that they weren’t actually rolling it out in that way, because as soon as they started doing the whole alternate cover thing, I was like: “Well, they clearly want us to try to go for number one!” You know, “They clearly think that they are going to be able to get number one on the hot 100 and we’re gonna use these sales to do that!” And clearly that’s all changed now.

They keep changing the rules on us, so — with JK, they’re obviously trying to, you know, use whatever tools they have available to them at this point.

Finally, when it comes to restocking the digital single CD. There are still albums available in the store. So why would they manufacture and ship more (likely thrown away) plastic that’s just for one song, when those CD singles only serve to raise sales for the charts? All of the other member’s CD singles are out of stock except The Astronaut, which they treated more like a proper album a bit (kinda like the Butter CD releases). Because they still have both versions of his full albums in stock, so if I were Hybe, I’d be like “No,you need to buy the album, we still have albums, we’re not going to sell you a single song when you can buy the album!” That makes more sense to me. The albums cost more.

TL:DR, haha — so I feel like this narrative around Jimin’s release has been ramped up because, from my professional opinion, he’s had the most expensive release so far (by far) and if we want to compare him to, say, Beyoncé — well she owns her own production company (Parkwood Entertainment), so she can funnel her own money into a Visual Album, I don’t know if Jimin has considered that at this point in his career, but in the future, he might!

((Not including costs for Suga’s tour because that’s a whole other thing, and the tour probably made money I would expect to balance out the cost of the tour itself))

Anonymous Insider

This isn’t to say that the other things, the part where he didn’t get the cake celebration, or the posts, the issues with the linking and this general feeling that Jimin was short-changed in these things isn’t valid and understandable. I think Hybe relied too much on D2C sales and I don’t think they leveraged their might as much as could have for JM. They could have risked more for him.

{This is an end of Anonymous Insider’s messages to me. They noted that they are an intermediate non-native Korean speaker so please excuse any translation errors. They translated things themselves using Naver tools that aligned with the video subtitles.}

So, listen, I still don’t think Like Crazy was sent/promoted to radio (which was a mistake and still is a mistake) and I am furious at the shady articles and lack of celebration for Jimin…

But after reading the way the members approach their work in the Beyond the Story book and now hearing from someone who produces these works for a living, I have to wonder if the company was doing everything they knew how to do for Jimin, but the second it didn’t work out because of the western music industry culling streams and sales, they pulled back all their resources and pivoted for Yoongi and JK. (I also wonder if leadership shut up about it all due to liability issues, or not to cause bad blood with the music industry for future releases.)

Again, I’ll never forgive the lack of celebration and the split streams (not without a great explanation), but at least now I think there’s a good chance no one was actively trying to sabotage Jimin on purpose. They seemed to have wanted that #1 and then it all went to shit because Billboard and radio want to get paid. Maybe leadership decided not to put any more resources into Face but instead pivot for all the future music coming out (including PJM2.)

Perhaps I'm a cockeyed optimist. I’m just hoping like hell they never engage in payola. I want all our boys to win, but I want us to win fairly. And even if everyone cannot have the same investment every time on every project, I hope when they come back together in 2025 that everyone feels good about their solo works and each other. This is my prayer. Love, Roo

[digi-lov]

Digimon 🤝 Pokémon

KoKabuterimon ST9-07 by GOSSAN from ST-9 Starter Deck Ultimate Ancient Dragon

Heracross PAL 006 by GOSSAN from Scarlet&VioletーPaldea Evolved

So. I don't like the idea that you can't be a fan of both Digimon and Pokémon. A while ago, I got an ask from a Pokémon fan asking how Digimon is any better than Pokémon, and I didn't really know how to answer that? I love both? I also like Yo-Kai Watch, by the way. You don't have to drag something down to elevate something else.

It does bother me that I sometimes get the feeling from certain kinds of Pokémon fans that they hate on Digimon, like it's their duty? I even had an argument with someone in real life who was convinced Digimon was a Pokémon rip-off, despite knowing nothing about Digimon in the first place.

But obviously, not all fans are like that, I'm a big Pokémon fan myself! I've played essentially all main line games and many side games. The Pokémon Special Manga was the first manga I read and is among my all-time favorites. I'm also active in my local Pokémon TCG community! I'm actually an official Pokémon TCG Judge, and I volunteer alongside my partner at our local card shops weekly "Pokémon School," where we teach children how to play the game. Although that sometimes also entails how to read cards, how to act respectful to your opponent, how to focus, what to look out for when building decks, how to tell if a card is fake, and much more...

That's another reason why I'm sad the Digimon Card Game only has an English language release in the West. Otherwise, I'd have introduced it to the kids already!

But yeah, I'm rambling a bit, my point being I don't want any hate, just love here. You don't have to like Pokémon. But it's definitely possible to like both.

So I wanna take a moment to show a couple of artists you know from the Digimon Card game who also like Pokémon!

Sanosuke Sakuma

Sanosuke Sakuma has been doing illustrations for the Digimon Card Game since the first set! Their strong point are cute characters, with most of their cards being of Baby Level Digimon (Lv.2) or Child Level Digimon (Lv.3). You can check out posts I did of their cards under #Sanosuke Sakuma

They also have been working as an illustrator for the Pokémon TCG since 2013 and have been working as character designer and illustrator for the main line Pokémon games since Pokémon Sun and Moon (2016).

GOSSAN

GOSSAN had been doing illustrations for the Digimon Card Game since BT-04 (2020) and have done over a hundred cards by this point. They're among the most likely artists to do game references and are very good at depicting action! Check out more of them under #GOSSAN

They also have been working as an illustrator for the Pokémon TCG since 2021 and already have a couple of Alternative Arts under their belt. Notably, they even got to illustrate the Alternative Art of Mewtwo Vstar, featuring it fighting Charizard, both of which are among the most popular Pokémon.

tessy

Tessy has been an illustrator for the Digimon Card Game since late 2020 and has been featured in almost every set since. Check out my posts featuring their cards under #tessy

While there is no Pokémon card featuring rheir art just yet, they entered and reached the semi-finals of the Pokémon TCG Illustration Contest 2022 with both their entries for Charizard and Bulbasaur.

Spareribs

Spareribs won second prize overall (and first for Devimon) of the Digimon Illustration Competition 2022 with their entry 「Fallen」. Ever since they've been working as an illustrator for the Digimon Card Game. You can see posts with their cards under #spareribs

They also entered the Pokémon TCG Illustration Contest 2022 and made it to the semi-finals with their entry for Greninja.

I hope we can all continue to share our passion for colorful critters. Thank you very much.

[crunchycrystals]

still thinking about That Scene in chris grace as scarlett johansson and i want as many people to watch this as possible so under the cut it goes. watch this if you've ever been interested in representation in media and how it affects the way you perceive yourself

anyways so ive talked briefly about how i love a good full utilization of a format (link here) but now i wanna go more in depth on it bc i love it a lot

make some noise

jesus christ the first time i saw this i paused and started jumping up and down on my couch. let me start with basics !!! i love that the video of the show appears on the make some noise tv. its so unnerving to see something completely detached from make some noise now on the tv after watching dozens of episodes. and sam just saying the normal spiel he does every time leaves you wondering for a few extremely disorienting seconds if they just edited the video onto a normal episode until he starts to introduce chris and you see his nameplate is erased. another extremely disorienting thing because we NEVER see the nameplates empty and it ties in so well with the identity crisis currently happening in the show. he has no idea who he is as a performer like is the performer part of him the real part?? how much has been played up for entertainment??? and then after the horror has been slammed into you by the prompt and seeing chris as confused by all of this as we are, he runs off which leads to the thing that kept me standing on my couch for the next 10 minutes

very important people

first off. i absolutely love the coincidence (or intentional detail???? who knows but either way) of chris's first line on the make some noise set being "my name is..." because that's the thing that started vip !!!!!!! and throughout the rest of the existential crisis dropout trip he constantly says "hello my name is" too ough i love that so much thats why i started writing this whole post. very important people is the perfect show to add to this segment it makes me feel a little feral thinking about it. coming out on stage without any alterations to his appearance, again back to the idea of is the chris grace on stage the real chris grace?? can he ever be??? and again his name is gone like in the scene before. vic says "you can be anything you want" like the thing scarjo said to justify playing an asian character and he still can't come up with anything. then the card transition oh my godddddddd

dirty laundry

(side note i did say before that the cards on the vip set were dirty laundry cards. i was wrong they are vip card the designs just look very similar esp compared to s1 of vip)

this is gonna be way shorter than the two rambles above i just think it's really cool to use the dirty laundry question format for some identity crisis stuff. i don't know how to properly express how cool i think it is i don't think i can do it justice. the "who..." format for the cards is a great way of expressing how he is losing grip of his identity

this section of the post is also to point out that i am only noticing now that the "dropout presents" version of chris is seen on the couch at some point also heckling stage chris which is a nice detail especially since part of the card was "who is generally a hypocrite"

gastronauts

gastronauts hasn't come out yet so i can't analyze this as much as i'd like but to me it just seems like an extension of the thing started in dirty laundry of everyone confusing him for scarlett johansson. i initially see this as a reference to the fact that throughout the whole show it's been going deeper than him playing scarlett as she plays him and then her playing him plays her again, etc, but thinking about it more for this post makes me think it's like the line between the real person and character they play blurring. i think everyone in the dropout audience is pretty familiar with this like we know brennan pissed on game changer isn't actually how he is in real life, but it's extremely easy to fall into that parasocial trap. when you put so much of your actual self in a character or performance it's hard to find the line between, even for the performer. chris keeps saying that he's not scarlett but everyone insists it's who he is

[sanaxo-o]

Brought The Heat Back (Kim Sunwoo)

Too @from-izzy : happiest birthday to my flower, my honey bee, the Sunwoo to my Chanhee <3 it’s been like almost a year since we knew each other??? Can you believe it 😭. We got so close so quickly that it’s crazy. Me calling you while walking back home and giving you a tour as I yap and you just sitting there and listening to me might be one of the best things we do 😼. Thank you for always being there for me when I needed to talk with someone the most 💗. You might be the only mutual who knows the most about me and it’s kind of crazy how our first conversation started with me flirting with you but I guess that’s my charm lol. Will always listen to you deny your feelings for Sunwoo but it’s okay since it’s you. Honestly I’d do anything to never lose our friendship which we built over the year and it’s just so pretty. Anyways, I’d never come to Australia since it’s pretty scary there but you’re always welcome to come to India 🥰. With that being said, I hope we always continue bickering, nagging each other over things and what not. And no, I will never stop sending you hot pics of Sunwoo 🧍‍♀️. With that being said, happy birthday to you my flower and I hope you like this little something I prepared. I swear I will try my best to publish watch it in October if it doesn’t come out in September (I really don’t think it will ever come out tho…) 🥰. I do hope you understand the small references I added in here bitch 👹. Was honestly so hard keeping this a secret :( Love you and have a great day (and years ahead) (plz stop overworking and stressing yourself out too much and start sleeping on time…)

Warnings/Genre: from friends to strangers to lovers to sum it up, jealous Sunwoo in a good way, fluff, angst ig, kissing scenes, mildly suggestive (wow finally my debut??), Sunwoo gets drunk, Eric being the bestie everyone deserves, cursing ig? I don’t remember honestly, Sunwoo and the reader are both stupid honestly. Idk what else comes here so yeah…tell me if I have to add more

Sana: so I wrote this like last month but had to wait a whole month because I wanted to publish it on Izzy’s birthday. A huge thanks to @deobienthusiast @winterchimez @mosviqu and @itsbeeble for beta reading it and giving me countless compliments 🫶🏻. I honestly loved writing this so I hope you guys enjoy reading it just as much!

Word Count: 4,943

Taglist: @deoboyznet @kimsohn @a-dream-bookmark @cloverdaisies @quaissants @loserlvrss @bella-feed

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

Clenching his fist tightly Sunwoo couldn’t help but let out a scoff unknowingly when he saw you flirting with that same guy again. 

It might have been a few weeks since summer break ended but Sunwoo didn’t expect for you to already move on from whatever the two of you had. 

It wasn’t like you both were dating per se. You weren’t but it wasn’t even like you both were just friends. 

I mean from what he knows friends don’t kiss each other, nor do they make out in the summer heat with their fingers intertwined with one another. 

It was like it was yesterday when the two of you were ‘dating’ and while it lasted it was nothing but a safe space of heaven for Sunwoo. 

He was never someone to take a person seriously but with you, it felt different. It was as if you were the one for him the moment the two of you decided to hang out together in summer. 

The way you ditched your friends at the party because he was sitting outside alone. No one had ever done that for him, even though it was just to keep him company Sunwoo still felt his heart swell with content as he listened to you ramble on and on about some plushies you had at your old house in Australia. 

At that very moment Sunwoo had that sudden urge to show you around the town, I mean you were new in the area. You probably didn’t know the most shortcuts so it was kind of his responsibility (it wasn’t) to show you around, no? 

“Do you wanna go for a walk?” He whispers softly as he extends his hand towards you waiting for you to take it. 

Sunwoo could feel his heart racing at an abnormal rate as he waited for your response. The longer you took to answer the more he felt like it was a stupid idea. 

I mean who in the sane mind would walk around a town at night with someone they barely know? 

“Uh sure I guess?” Sunwoo hears your small mumble as you flash him a nervous smile. 

Maybe you were insane enough to do just what he had in mind. 

Heaving out a low chuckle Sunwoo slowly wraps his fingers around yours as he pulls you up from the floor. 

“So why did you come to this town? I mean it’s summer break..” Sunwoo asks as he walks beside you on the empty road. 

“Oh I came here on a scholarship. I wanted to explore more in the summer break and maybe if I like it here I can study here for this semester. That’s what I had in mind so far.” Unknowingly Sunwoo’s eyes light up when he hears your consideration on staying here for the whole semester. 

Maybe it was just because he never had met someone like you but your vibes were just so different from the girls he normally hung out with. 

With others he never felt like he could truly be himself but with you it just felt like he was free. 

Call him crazy for feeling this was about a girl he just met but that was just how he felt and somehow this new feeling was making him feel alive more than anything. 

“Dude why the hell are you staring at Y/N like a creep?” Snapping back to reality Sunwoo throws a glare at Eric as he diverts his attention back to the now you who was just flirting with Hyunjae. 

Seeing you getting all touchy with someone other than him made him feel like punching someone.  

Now that’s something he never felt before because why would he ever feel like punching the guy just because you were flirting with him? It’s not like you guys were dating before for him to feel that way. 

Then why? The more he stared at you smiling at someone who was not him just made him lose his patience. 

If someone said that punching someone without getting in trouble was allowed then he’d waste no time in doing just that because his patience was running too thin for him to control it longer. 

Looking away Sunwoo sighed as he closed his locker with a thud. He knew that if he looked at you for any longer than he might just lose his patience and he did not want to create a scene. 

It’s not his fault he’s feeling that way. It’s just that you have the ability to make anyone want to talk with you more and more. He’s only admitting that because he felt it when you decided to strike a conversation with him for the first time. 

If it was anyone else he would have just rolled his eyes and walked away but when he saw it was you he felt that feeling of getting to know you more. 

The curiosity of knowing you better and spending time with you was bigger than anything else and now seeing you standing there with Hyunjae just made him go crazy. I mean, why were you even flirting with other guys when he was right there? 

“If you’re wondering why you got ditched like that then it’s totally your fault.” Sunwoo hears Eric’s voice say from beside him as he does nothing to deny it. 

He himself knows that you’re ignoring his whole existence and presence because he was the first one to do so. 

He didn’t want to ignore you but he was just scared of hurting you by doing something which wasn’t supposed to be done. He was scared that if he let the relationship you had escalate further, something wrong would happen along the way and he would lose you. 

He did feel like he was gonna commit to it for real this time but then maybe overthinking about making a mistake in the future led him to distance himself with you and now he is the one who has to see you with some other guys who’s not him. 

It’s a weird feeling he’s having but somehow he’s envious of Hyunjae because he gets to be close with you and hear your laugh everyday unlike him who was even scared to approach you now. 

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

“Can I ask one thing?” Eric asks Sunwoo who had just entered the classroom and was placing his stuff down. 

“What now?” Sunwoo asks in an annoyed voice as he flashes a glare at Eric and diverts his attention back at you, who was busy talking with that guy again. 

He couldn’t believe you would just ignore his whole existence as if that night didn’t almost take place. 

“No need to get annoyed at me..” Eric mumbles as he heaves out a sigh when he notices Sunwoo’s longing stare at your figure again. 

Eric admits that he has never seen his best friend be this jealous over a certain girl. Now if Eric decided to confront Sunwoo about his jealousy over you then he’d deny it for sure and he didn’t want to argue with his stubborn ass again. 

“You both were talking when the semester started. Why did you cut ties suddenly?” Hearing Eric’s question Sunwoo stiffens in his seat as he remembers the events that took place the night before you both stopped interacting with each other completely. 

Covering his eyes with his hands Sunwoo takes in a deep breath as he tries to get his thoughts straight before answering Eric’s question. 

-x- 

Sunwoo POV 

My ears perk up when I suddenly hear the doorbell ringing. Looking up at the clock I tilt my head in confusion as I see the hands indicating that it was 11 o’clock. 

Why would anyone come over at this hour? I stand up with shaky legs as I grab the pan from the kitchen and take slow and steady steps towards the door. 

Opening the peephole I furrow my eyebrows when I see you standing outside with just a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants. 

I let out a yelp when you throw yourself at me the moment I open the door. 

“Hey hey, what’s wro-” I widen my eyes when you kiss me without letting me even complete my sentence fully. 

It’s as if someone had turned the gears in my mind as I immediately sink my lips with yours. The way your tongue was battling with mine to prove dominance was something I had never experienced with you before. 

I snake my hands at the small of your back as I lead you towards my bedroom. Opening the door I push you against the wall as I caress your cheek with my free hand while the other plays with the loose strands of your hair. 

I pull away from the kiss slowly when I feel your hands tapping against my chest. 

I feel a small smile creep up my face when I realise that for once I wasn’t scared of what was going to happen next and I was fully on board with whatever thought you had at the moment. 

“I…were we about to..?” I feel my heart sink when I hear you ask that question. Wait…did you not want it? Was I going too fast? Was I pushing you into doing something you didn’t want? 

“Uh…I don't know. Did you not have the same thing in mind?” I questioned back, as my voice came out shakier than I intended it to be. 

“No..no it’s not that..” I take a step back when you say that, too afraid to hurt you by any chance, “Fuck..I just had a lot in my mind and I didn’t know what I was thinking..” 

My eyes widen when you say that. Worry and concern immediately coming across my face as I reach out to comfort you but retract my hand back when you back away from me. 

“You know what…forget..forget this ever happened. I should go..” I take a step forward to stop you. To tell you that I am there for you to listen to your problems but I didn’t have the guts in me to do so. 

Not after what just happened. What if you were uncomfortable by being around me? That can’t happen though…we always had our own way with our conversations. 

I snap out of my thoughts when I hear my front door close with a thud. It was as if the moment I closed my eyes, your smiling face would flash in my mind. 

From that moment on, I decided that I would distance myself from you. I cannot imagine losing someone like you over something so small…

What if you guys go on a date and get in a relationship? You’re bound to break up and then that break up would lead to you cutting off ties with him. 

And if he does that first then he doesn’t have to worry about you getting hurt more, right? It doesn’t make sense he knows but the way the events turned out at the moment isn’t really letting him think clearly. 

-x- 

“Did Y/N try to approach you the next day?” I look up at Eric when I hear his question. 

I let my pencil slip from my hands as I stopped scribbling around on the book. 

“She did but I may have ignored her…” I mumbled quietly as I shared a look with Eric. I could see his eyes flash a tiny bit of disappointment but he shakes his head and looks ahead at the professor again. 

“Why can’t you just talk it out with her? I am sure she has an explanation for whatever happened and why she stormed out that night.” I look up thoughtfully at his suggestion but quickly shake my head as I ponder on that thought more. 

“Why not?” Eric asks in confusion as he continues staring at me, waiting for my reply but all he got in return was my silence as I slowly diverted my attention back at you. 

I mess my hair up as I feel that weird feeling back at the pit of my stomach. I felt like I was going crazy the more I stared at you smiling so sweetly at hyunjae. It should be me instead of him. 

“WHAT THE HELL!” I yelled loudly when Eric suddenly pushed me off my chair. I glared at him as I looked around the classroom and noticed the countless eyes staring at me but you were still not looking at me. 

It’s as if you just wiped out the fact that I just screamed loudly and possibly hurt myself because of Eric. 

Standing up from the floor I bow as I feel my cheeks starting to burn from embarrassment. Getting back in my seat I shove Eric away from me as I bury my face in between my hands as I try to forget about what just happened. 

“At least tell me now why you won’t confront her.” Eric asks more calmly now as he tries to make me sit straight. 

I sigh as I look at him from the corner of my eyes, “I am scared of what she will reply. It’s better if we both act like it didn’t happen, right?” I reply as I steal one last glance at you and Hyunjae only to look away in less than a second when I feel my head spinning. 

“Do you know what you’re feeling right now?”  I groan when he opens his mouth. Why does he never shut up? 

“What?” I ask in annoyance as I place my head on the table, not taking any interest in whatever he was about to say. 

“Jealousy.” I whip my head at him when he says that. Me? And being jealous? For what? Yeah sure whenever I see you smiling at him I feel that burning sensation, or when you laugh at whatever stupid joke he made. 

I scoff as I shake my head, “Yeah sure. I don’t get jealous over such a trivial matter. I bet I know Y/N better than he does.” I mumble before sliding down on the chair to try and possibly hide myself from the whole world. 

“Tell that to yourself but I sure do see you being jealous.” I flick Eric’s head when he says that again. 

I am definitely not jealous. 

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Y/N POV 

I sighed as I heard Sunwoo’s voice arguing with Eric. It wasn’t a new occurrence for me anymore and honestly I was quite used to it ever since I started hanging out with Sunwoo in summer. 

I’d hate to admit it but Sunwoo was the only guy who honestly made me alive enough in summer (to be frank I never truly enjoyed holidays because I am someone who felt like I needed to be busy and working all the time). 

I diverted my attention back at Hyunjae as I smiled softly at him. He was a good guy but he was not Sunwoo. 

He didn’t have the same aura or personality like Sunwoo and I begged myself to try and find at least some of that charm in Hyunjae which I was dying to see. 

I admit that I was kind of in the wrong to storm out of Sunwoo’s house when we both knew what it was leading to. I didn’t want to make him overthink about my reaction too much but to be frank I was just too damn nervous to think straight that when I snapped back into reality I didn’t know what to do. 

It was as if I didn’t have control over my own body and I just stormed out of there after blabbering some shit which probably made Sunwoo misunderstand the whole situation. 

BUT I did try to explain myself the next day but Sunwoo acted as if nothing had happened the day before and it just made me feel worse about my actions. Did I hurt him that much? Was I too nervous to realise that maybe what it was leading to could have been nice? 

I don’t know but I wish I could just turn back the time and relive the moment so that I don’t make the same mistake as before. 

“Are we set on tonight?” I blink my eyes a few times as I look at hyunjae for a moment only to look away quickly while clearing my throat. 

“Uh for what? I was just spaced out for a moment there.” I mumble as I scribble down the notes in my book in shabby handwriting (I could still read what I wrote so that’s all that matters, no?) 

“Yeah I noticed later on. I was talking about our date. I will pick you up at 8:00. Fine by you?” I nod my head as I chew on my nails as I drift back to the unconditional memories I had made with Sunwoo. 

-x- 

“Sssp!” I flinch when Sunwoo shoves my hand away from my mouth with a hiss escaping his throat. I threw a glare in his direction as I hit the back of his head before slowly bringing my nails back to my mouth only for it to be pulled away by Sunwoo as he intertwined our fingers together to stop me from biting on the nails. 

I could feel my cheeks burning from embarrassment and shyness as I cleared my throat and looked anywhere but at Sunwoo. 

“Look I know you have grown a habit of biting your nails but instead of biting on those nasty nails why don’t you try and talk with me instead? I am here to listen to you, you know?” When I hear those words of Sunwoo it strangely enough comforts me in ways which I never knew were possible. 

I didn’t even know that I wanted to be comforted. Maybe all those thoughts getting jumbled in my brain really messes up with what I really need. 

I give Sunwoo a small nod as I look ahead again, “Well now you have me to stop you from biting your nails.” Sunwoo whispers as he pokes my cheeks with his other finger. 

I just chuckle at that and bring my other hand up to squeeze his cheeks. The way I loved it when he pouted I thought as I smiled at him fondly. 

-x-

I look back at Sunwoo in thought, my face contorted with slight pain as I try my best not to have a breakdown over not only Sunwoo but also just about life in general.  

I feel my heart racing rapidly when I make eye contact with Sunwoo. It was as if it was just the two of us in the room and everyone else had either just disappeared or they were in slow motion. 

It didn’t seem to last long since before I could even offer a smile at Sunwoo he had already looked away. 

Oh how I wish I could change this awkward phase in whatever relationship we had and just go back to how it used to be. 

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

I kick the rocks on the ground as I try to drown out the voices in the background. Well the date did not go well per se (it’s not Hyunjae’s fault. It’s just…I couldn’t help but only think about Sunwoo while Hyunjae was busy talking. It’s as if no matter how hard I try Sunwoo would always be at the back of my mind and it’s driving me insane.) 

I roll my eyes when I feel my phone vibrating in my bag, I let it ring as I was in no mood to talk with anyone. 

Looking up from the ground, my eyes sparkle when I see an ice cream shop. I start walking towards it when my phone starts vibrating again. 

I sigh as I open my bag to take a look at the caller ID but what  I did not expect was the caller ID flashing on the screen. 

‘Why the hell is Sunwoo calling me?’ I think as I slowly accept the call while walking towards the shop. 

“Is this Y/N?” I stop walking when I hear an unknown voice on the other side. I couldn’t help but think the worst. 

Did Sunwoo get himself in trouble? Did he hurt himself? Is he okay? 

“Yes, that's her..” I replied. I could hear Sunwoo’s voice at a distance but it seemed to be coming out slurred. I couldn’t help but furrow my eyebrows together in confusion. 

“I am sorry but I think your boyfriend is drunk…” I slap my hand against my forehead when I hear that but immediately feel my cheeks heat up when I hear the word boyfriend. 

“Where is he right now?” I ask shyly as I immediately call a taxi to go over at the location the person told me. 

-x- 

Why the hell is this guy drinking alone at night and that too in a PARK? Did he for real lose it or is he close to losing it? 

I quicken my pace when I see Sunwoo sitting on a bench with a guy trying to keep him straight and awake so that he doesn’t fall asleep in the park. 

I approach them as I take over Sunwoo and apologise to the man and grab Sunwoo cheeks which were a slight shade of pink. 

I sit beside him on the bench and slap his cheeks a few times to help him gain some consciousness. 

I giggle when he blinks his eyes a few times and stares at me for a second before he brings his hands up as he drags his fingers over my lower lips. 

I push his hand away slightly as I mumble softly, “You’re not sober. So, you’re not allowed to touch me.” 

A small stupid smile creeps up on Sunwoo’s face as he brings his hand back to himself as he rubs his eyes while speaking, “So am I allowed to touch you when I am sober?” He mumbles before staring back at you. 

“If I say yes will you shut up?” I mumble as my eyes trail down to his swollen lips for a second before I glance back at his eyes again. 

I smile when he gives a gentle nod, standing up I extend my hand out towards him to help him stand up, “I am only saying yes because I know you will forget all about this in the morning.” I mumble as I drag him towards the cab which was waiting for us. 

“Do you really think so?” He slurs out the words while getting in the car, “Ack!” He yelps in pain when his head bangs against the roof of the car. 

I immediately lean forward and take a look at his forehead. My eyebrows furrow in worry when it starts to swell but all Sunwoo does is laugh at the drunken guy he saw outside (who was busy puking by the way.) 

-x- 

I enter the house with Sunwoo as I drag him towards his bed. Okay, all I had to do was throw him on his bed, put a warm blanket over him and wash his face with a wet towel. 

I can do that without thinking about the past, right? Of course I can! 

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

Sunwoo POV 

I groan in pain when I feel my head throbbing. Maybe drinking till late at night was a bad idea but how did I even get home? I don’t think I went to drink with any of my friends. 

Grabbing the glass of water from the bedside table, I drink some of it when my attention drifts to my arm. I see some messy writing on it. 

Getting curious, I place the glass down and take a closer look at my arm after blinking a few times to get rid of the blurriness. 

‘She says I could touch her when I am sober.’ She? Who’s she…

I close my eyes as I try to think back to the moments which took place yesterday. 

“No fucking way…” I gasp as I recall the conversations me and Y/N had. Nooo this is so embarrassing. She saw me being a drunk idiot. 

I place my head in my pillow and scream in it as I try my best to hide my whole existence. Why can’t the world just swallow me right now? 

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

Entering the auditorium I see Y/N with that Hyunjae guy again. Gosh…he looks so boring. What did she even see in him? 

I scowl as I take a seat right behind them because someone decided it would be a great idea to sit behind my ex who was not really my ex because we never officially dated BUT we did kiss and make out a couple of times but let’s not talk about that. 

I kick Eric’s leg when he strikes up a conversation with Hyunjae. He was my sworn enemy! How could he just talk with that boring ass? Gosh this kid really needs to level his taste up when it comes to talking with just anyone. 

The whole time the lecture was going on not once did I stop burning holes in the back of Y/N’s head. 

I could tell she wanted to look back at me by turning around but maybe I was just looking too handsome that she didn’t even want to take a look at me.  

Heaving out a sigh I stood up once the lecture was over. 

“I think we should talk…” I stop dead in my tracks when I hear her voice. No fucking way is she talking with me? 

I gulp as I look at her for a moment before I immediately look down at the books in my hands. 

I hand the books to Eric without any second thoughts as I follow you to the back of the auditorium. 

I sit down on the floor as you follow behind and do the same. I couldn’t believe that after so long we’re finally talking again but I could feel my heartbeat rising more as you stretched the already tense moment.  

“What’s up?” I mumble out as I try not to make it sound awkward even though the way I spoke already gave away the fact that it was more than just awkward silence. 

I cover my face with my eyes as I wait for you to start speaking again, “So…about that night.” I hear your voice speak from beside me. 

I slowly bring my hands down as I take a small peek at you, “You don’t have to say it if you don’t want to. I am sorry if I made you uncomfortable.” 

“No no you didn’t make me uncomfortable. I was just nervous…I was scared I would do something wrong and embarrass myself.” I just stare at you as you explain yourself. 

“I am sorry…I am sorry that I didn’t even give you the chance to explain yourself. I hate to admit it but I was scared to listen to your explanation.” I say softly as I take your hand in mine. 

I smile when I hear your small giggle. Oh how I missed making you laugh…

“So what do you think about Hyunaje?” I furrow my eyebrows when you ask me that question. Were you really pulling my leg? 

“Hyunjae? I hate that guy. Who does he think he is?” I mumble as I scoff in irritation.

I stare at you again when you laugh at my answer. You were really enjoying this, no? “What if I go on another date with him?” 

It feels as if my eyes almost bulge out when you ask that question. “Date? I dare you. I will come and burn everything that is there and take you away from there.” I mumble as I kiss the back of your hand while our fingers are still intertwined. 

“Aww you’re such a jealous baby.” I scoff and roll my eyes and mumble out a small ‘I am not jealous’ when even I know it’s not the truth. 

“I am kidding. I hope we can give our relationship another chance?” My eyes light up when you finally say the words I wanted to hear. 

“I swear I won’t mess up this time.” I say quietly as I kiss the crown of your forehead and give a peck on your cheeks.  

“So what did you feel like when you used to see Hyunjae and me together?” I just stare at you silently when you ask that question. 

You really were having fun teasing me. I get up and walk out of the room with you following behind while laughing at my jealous ass. 

I stop on my tracks when I see hyunjae being buddies with Eric. I couldn’t help the disgusted face taking over my facial features as I stared at that guy doing some stupid handshake with Eric. 

“I cannot believe you’re jealous over Eric and Hyunjae now.” I side eye you when you say that and flick your forehead once before walking away with you yelling my name out. 

“Geez I am sorry!” I yell loudly when you suddenly come in front of me and kiss me on the lips. 

I smiled in between the kiss when I noticed you going on your tiptoes just to kiss me. I slowly lean down so that it’s easier for you to kiss me. 

Giggling I look at you when you pull away, your cheeks slowly turning hues of red as mine does the same.  “Maybe I am a jealous guy after all.” I mumble as I hug you tightly.

[spell-cleaver]

One thing I've always wondered is how Vader didn't sense either Luke (or Leia's for that matter) force presence on the first death star. I guess he was super caught up in with the whole "I sense the old coot who cut off my limbs amd left me to burn" thing, but I like to think obi-wan was masking the pair by just being obnoxiously loud with the force (the force equivalent of him walking into a room with multiple air horns and a boom box blasting away)

Wow, I had THOUGHTS about this one.

Honestly? I'm not a fan of the assumption in a lot of fic and by fans that it's super easy to passively sense someone in the Force. I have used it myself, of course, but I say from experience it restricts writing a lot while... not actually having a ton of backing in the films? (I'm referring to the films here, not to any other media, just because when I want to analyse lore, I only take them as canon; when I'm just looking for cool worldbuilding for a fic, though, anything goes.)

It's not just Leia that Vader doesn't sense on the Death Star. He doesn't sense Luke either, even though Luke is right there screaming when Vader kills Obi-Wan. It's more of an issue with Leia ofc because he literally used the mind probe on her but only finds that "her resistance... is considerable". An easy answer is that I headcanon Leia is a naturally good shielder, which is why she was never found on the Death Star and also why all of the Jedi in ROTS were surprised there were two babies - Leia had been naturally shielding herself, so they just sensed Luke.

But if we go more in-depth into the films' representations of the Force, Vader only senses Luke when he's actively chasing him as a pilot; he comments that "The Force is strong with this one" only when Luke is using the Force to aim and fire his shot. For me, this implies that you can only sense other Force users powerfully or distinctly when they're actively using the Force. I know why fic prefers not to go that way - I for one have used the "Vader senses Luke immediately" plot to get Luke captured many a time - but it's a fun thing to consider. Also, the Force is a soft magic system. It does functionally whatever the story needs it to.* Which is why Vader can sense Luke approaching Endor in ROTJ when Palpatine couldn't, but he had to be told by an officer when Luke's ship was approaching Cloud City in ESB.** There are many examples where a Force user just didn't sense someone else. Luke not sensing Yoda in ESB, Obi-Wan not sensing Dooku's presence on Geonosis, the Jedi non sensing Maul in TPM, the Jedi not sensing Palpatine for the whole prequel trilogy.

You could argue that those examples are of trained Force wielders shielding themselves, but I would argue that Qui-Gon can't sense Anakin in TPM. He doesn't show interest in Anakin until after they've left Watto's shop and Anakin starts talking to him. Anakin is the literal son of the Force and the most powerful Force wielder ever, but Qui-Gon was talking to Watto for a while without batting an eyelash at the small supernova in his shop. He didn't start to suspect until he heard about his racing, his instincts, spoke to him to notice his insights. Then still he spoke to Shmi about him to confirm his suspicions that "he can see things before they happen", watched him while he flew, and took a midichlorian count. I think the Force might well have been nudging Qui-Gon to look at Anakin, to suspect something, but I don't think he sensed Anakin himself as Force sensitive - at least, not immediately. Which is how I think you can explain all the instances of people going "I felt his presence." They were either using the Force, or familiar as Force sensitives to the person sensing them, or the Force wielder in general had an instinct that there was something special about this person, I should pay attention...

This has been a long ramble, but the short answer is: I headcanon Leia as naturally good at shielding. I think it fills multiple Star Wars plot holes.***

But I think it's also worth interrogating the fact that fandom seems to approach and conceptualise of the Force as a hard magic system, with clearly defined rules, rather than the soft magic system it is.**** Anything goes in Star Wars! It can be annoying if the writing doesn't sell it well enough, but I really love that aspect of the worldbuilding. And considering that the Force is a big fat plot device as well as giving people magical instincts for things that are Plot Relevant and things that aren't, I think it's a lot more interesting to consider that the Force isn't a superpower that lets you sense everything. Vader didn't detect Leia simply because he didn't. Sometimes they fail to do that. And it allows you to show growth in character and situation when that fact changes. Vader doesn't sense Luke in ANH until he's Plot Relevant to Vader's personal story. He doesn't sense Luke until he's fighting him in ESB. But in ROTJ, once they're both invested in their relationship and fated to meet, they're drawn together like stars caught in a mutual orbit.

That's the explanation I prefer. Because although it's less consistent, it's not unbelievable. It leaves uncertainty, mysticism, the chance for exploration in the galaxy. And most importantly, it tells a damn good story. Which, while this may not be true of people who love collecting lore and figuring the galaxy out, is ultimately what I'm here for.

*This is why so many random new powers can get added and explored in later movies and such, and also why I don't really get het up about it when they do add them. It just depends how you incorporate that new power. Usually, if a villain suddenly has a new power no one knew about (like Palpatine's lightning in ROTJ) it just ups the stakes, while if a hero suddenly has a new power it can feel like it cheapens their victory, like they haven't earned it; a deus ex machina. So messing about with Force powers is fine, it just depends how you incorporate them in the story.

**Admittedly this can be explained by the bond being formed when Luke learned the truth, but you know what I mean.

***I was only talking about the movies here, but there's also that moment in the Kenobi series where she's captured by Inquisitors and still no one notices she's Force sensitive??? There's just a lot of moments like this littered all over Star Wars, so this headcanon covers a lot of them.

****I kept using the terms hard/soft magic system without really explaining it here, but here's some good videos to dig into it: Soft Magic Systems | Hard Magic Systems

[kerizaret]

Hello everyone and welcome once again to my brain! Today I want to ramble a bit about

✨️ Tsukasa and Rakunosuke (Emu's grandpa) parallels ✨️

Because I feel like we don't talk about them much. Or at all actually

Now, I'm not pulling this out of nowhere. It's quite literally stated at least once, outright, in the game, that Tsukasa is really similar to Emu's grandpa (or even twice – but the other time I'm unsure 100% whether its about Tsukasa specifically, which I'll get to later). That's not to mention the other little things throughout the stories that I think similar between the two

So here's just some thoughts I've had on the topic after rewatching some events, more or less cohesive

1) Tsukasa's PXL auditon & WMS speech

Starting at the very beginning, we've known ever since the wxs main story that there's something in Tsukasa that has drawn Emu in to him already the first time she's ever saw him, at his audition for PXL, which made her hire him herself. She says "found you" at that moment, as if she's been searching for someone exactly like him. Out of all the possible candidates who applied who she might've seen, why Tsukasa specifically?

It could be just about him boasting about making fantastic shows, which of course is a part of it. But I feel like this isn't all, that there was something else that she noticed, that maybe she didn't fully realise at that moment

Then later, in Wonder Magical Showtime, after Tsukasa's motivational speech, Emu specifically thinks back to that audition and how she felt something special there. And, most importantly, she thinks it as if she's talking to her grandpa – like he's somehow tied to it, to her realisation that Tsukasa is the one

Putting aside the fact they were fighting for Rakunosuke's park, which obviously makes Emu think back to him, there's something more. Emu doesn't think anything of the sort about Rui, even though he was the one who came up with the night show, or about Nene. Nor did she mention any kind of this strong feeling/conviction about having them on the Wonder Stage in the main story

She's focused on Tsukasa, because he's the one that brought all these people together and gave them the last push they needed to fight for PXL. He's the one they listen to, he who understands what this park was all about and why they need to save it. He's standing on the stage her grandpa built, looking at all those people working here, and he's leading them, telling them this dream CAN be made a reality and it's more important than anything else

And I feel like she could have looked at that and been reminded of her grandpa a bit, with how much he loved the park he built and brought people together with the same ideals and love and made dreams come true

2) Miles

Speaking of WMS, I'm sure we all remember Miles, the sorcerer Tsukasa played in the night show in WMS, and how he was a character very clearly based on Rakunosuke. It's not very surprising it's Tsks who got this role, but it's still interesting to me. It feels like no-one else would've been able to get this character right and neither would Emu as Shao with someone else playing Miles

I won't get into what "Miles" Tsukasa says in the play, because that's just the script and not a representation of Tsukasa himself, but I do want to draw attention to the specific scene where Emu's father is watching the night show and looks at Tsukasa, then says this:

This is the first time that – i suspect – Tsukasa is outright "stated" to be like Rakunosuke. Here I say "suspected" since I'm not 100% sure of it for two reasons. One of them being that as we know, the ensekai translation is sometimes often bad. For that I looked up the original text as well as an old translation of the event on YT to check for differences

The line ends up being similar in meaning, more or less, but a bit more vague. That also ties to my second doubt though, which is that Emu's father might be referring not to Tsukasa himself, per se, but rather to the character of Miles he's playing

I feel like both can make sense, in their own way (and the event is a Tsukasa focus for a reason, too), but for here I'm throwing it more as a hint than any kind of outright proof. Food for thought

3) Tsukasa and Rakunosuke's deams

Then, as we reach Popping in my Heart! and learn more of Rakunosuke from Riley's pov, there's another interesting thing that pops up. That is, the fact that Tsukasa and Rakunosuke share the same dream

And then, that's when Emu confirms what I've talked about before – that this whole time, she's felt something about Tsukasa being so reminding of her Grandpa

So Tsukasa has all this time "carried the same spirit" as Rakunosuke – which is possibly the reason why Emu has been feeling strangely drawn to him from the beginning

4) The Wonderland SEKAI

Hey. Hey. Remember this line?

(tl by tsukasa's #3 fan on YT)

Yeah, this one. The same reason why wxs even has "Wonderlands" in their troupe name

You know what else has Wonderland in its name?

That's right! Tsukasa's SEKAI!

Tsukasa's SEKAI. A different world that's created from his feelings, that's a place born from his desire to make everyone smile with his shows. A world that just recently expanded to include plushies representing all those different shows – different worlds – wxs created as a troupe. It's a world that Tsukasa, in a way, made by himself (albeit unconsciously)

Oh did I mention the Wonderland SEKAI is also, primarily, pre-wl, a theme park? With a big ass ferris wheel and several stages and a castle and a train and a merry-go-round, a rollercoaster and more? You know, kind of just like Phoenix Wonderland? Which was built by Emu's grandpa?

Do you ever think about that? That both Tsukasa and Rakunosuke "made" their own "Wonderlands"? That the SEKAI is so similar to PXL? Because I do

Anyway. Those were the main similarities or references I noticed, but I still have some few other miscellaneous thoughts i had aside from that that I'll sum up a bit quicker

Tsukasa and Emu's grandpa both care more about the shows (& pxl) themselves and the effect they have on people to make them smile than any kind of fame or recognition

A reminder, too, that despite the movie's popularity, nobody really knew that Rakunosuke worked on "Smiley" (or that it was even a Riley Entertainment movie at all)

There's also the fact that both tsks and rknsk get stuck more on the excitement they want their audiences to feel rather than on the technical sides or worries about how it would be possible – as seen with Rakunosuke convincing Riley to include all his dreams and ideas in "Smiley" without focusing as much on the budget and all to install that wonder in the viewers, and Tsukasa doing anything to perfect his acting, and also agreeing to most of Rui's stunts and experiments and production ideas as long as it gets the audience to become more immersed

I noticed as well that they're both people who wear their hearts on their sleeves, who easily get emotional and enthusiastic, who empathise a lot with the others' emotions and struggles, becoming happy when something good happens to them

^ he cried here. And later at the fan festa seeing nene sing confidently and happily he teared up again

And also just *gestures vaguely at pandemonium event and Rui's "tsukasa's friends' happiness is his own happiness" line*. Yeah

Most importantly, Tsks and Rknsk both care so, so much about shows ending with smiles and not tears

And overall about everyone smiling and being happy. Like Tsukasa telling Emu in the main story, on the ferris wheel, that when her grandpa meant making EVERYONE smile, it included Emu, too, and he wanted to make sure she's happy as well

There's also everything with Emu, too. The way she's very clingy with Tsukasa, always throwing herself at him (not that she isn't with everyone, but she does seem to jump at him the most often)

She's also implied to open up a bit more around him – in Smile of a Dreamer, when wxs expressed their worries about emu hiding her problems, KAITO implies that its unusual she "hasn't told EVEN Tsukasa"

And it's Tsukasa who first understood that, despite how it may seem that "she always is so optimistic and says whatever's on her mind", in the end "the bigger the problem, the less likely she is to talk" (paraphrased quotes from smile of a dreamer). And also underdstood what's the most important to her and how to give her a push to voice her worries to them

It's Tsukasa who Emu first got so scared of leaving their troupe and her behind

I simply feel like Emu is aware of the similarities her grandpa and Tsukasa share and, subconsciously, trusts him a lot and gets attached to him easily

Anyway. This is just a bunch of thoughts that came to mind that I wanted to share and hear your thoughts on maybe too. I love emukasa so much they have such a great dynamic, and I feel the implied similarities between Rakunosuke and Tsukasa add a lot to that too. I'm really curious if it'll be something they'll explore more in future events. Because I feel these parallels are there for some reason

[hauntingofhouses]

i know I've mentioned my interpretation of mizu's gender a million times on here but i don't think i ever fully elaborated on it.

so on that note i just wanna ramble about that for a bit. basically, it's my reading of the show that mizu is nonbinary, so let me dig into that.

putting the rest under the cut because it ended up being pretty long lol. also here have a cute mizu pic of her being happy and most at ease with herself, symbolised by her letting her hair down. <3 ok let's proceed.

thus, when i refer to mizu as nonbinary, i am interpreting mizu as a woman, but not ONLY a woman. not strictly a woman. she is also a man. she is also neither of these things, she is something in between, while at the same time she is none of these at all. i've said as much many times, but i just don't want people to think that when i say nonbinary, it inherently means a "third androgynous gender" that essentially turns the gender binary into a gender trinary. not only is that going against what the term nonbinary was crafted for (to go against rigid boxes and categorisation of gender identities), but also, not all nonbinary people fall under that category or definition, and that's definitely not the way i interpret mizu.

okay before i go deeper i'd just like to address some important things. first of all, this post is an analysis of canon, and thus everything i am arguing for is about my own interpretation of the show, and not some baseless projected headcanon i am projecting onto the character. please remember there is a difference between an interpretation (subjective; interpretations will differ from viewer to viewer, but ultimately it is firmly rooted in evidence taken from the source material) VS a headcanon (unrelated and often even contrary to what is presented in canon; opinions wildly differ and they cannot be argued for because there is no canonical evidence to back it up).

ALSO please note that nonbinary is an umbrella term. this means that it applies to a vast range of gender identities. other identities that fall under the nonbinary umbrella include agender, bigender, genderfluid, and so on. however, it's my personal preference to use the term nonbinary as it is, simply because i'm not a fan of microlabels (more power to you if you do like them and find they suit you more though!).

also, before anyone fights me on this, let me clarify further that gender means something different to everyone. it's not your biological sex or physical characteristics. but at the same time, gender is not mere presentation. you can be a trans woman and still present masculine—either because you're closeted and forced to, or because you just want to—and either way, that doesn't take away from your identity as a woman. same goes for trans men. if you're a trans man but you wear skirts and don't bind or don't get top surgery, that doesn't make you any less of a man. because gender non-conformity exists, and does not only apply to cis people! some lesbians are nonbinary and prefer using he/him pronouns while dressing masculinely, but that doesn't mean they're a man, or that they're any less of a lesbian. neither does this mean that they're a cis woman.

the thing about queer identities in general is that, like i said, they mean something different to everyone, because how you identify—regardless of your biological attributes and fashion or pronouns—is an extremely personal experience. so a nonbinary person and a gnc cis woman's experiences might have plenty of overlap, but what distinguishes between the two is up to the individual. there's no set requirements to distinguish you as one or the other, but it's up to you to decide what you identify as, based on what you feel. either way, by simply identifying yourself as anything under the LGBTQ+ umbrella, you are already communicating to the world that you are not what a conservative, cisheteronormative society wants you to be.

which is why i find all this queer infighting on labels to be so ridiculous. because we're all fighting the same fight; the common enemy is a societal structure that divides us into set roles and expectations purely based on our biological parts. that's why biological essentialism in the queer community is a fucking disease. because by arguing that women are inherently weak and fragile and soft and gentle and must be protected from evil ugly men, while men are inherently strong and angry and violent and exploitative of women, these people are advocating for the same fucked up system that marginalises and abuses women as well as effeminate and/or gay men.

anyway. i'm going on a tangent. this was meant to be a blue eye samurai post. so yeah back to that— the point i'm trying to make is that there's no singular way to identify as anything, as everyone's views on gender, especially their own, is specific and personal to the individual.

so with that being said, yes you can definitely interpret mizu as a gnc cis woman and that's a totally valid reading of the text. however, interpreting her as nonbinary or transmasc also doesn't take away from her experiences with misogyny and female oppression, because nonbinary and transmasc folks also experience these things.

me, personally, i view her as nonbinary but not necessarily or not always transmasc because i still believe femininity and womanhood is a very inherent part of who mizu is. for example, from what we've seen, she does not like binding. it does not give her gender euphoria, but is instead very uncomfortable for her both physically and mentally, and represents her suppressing her true self. which is why when she "invites the whole" of herself, she stands completely bare in front of the fire, breasts unbound and hair untied. when she is on the ship heading to a new land in the ending scene, she is no longer hiding her neck and the lack of an adam's apple. we can thus infer that mizu does not have body dysmorphia. she is, in fact, comfortable in her body, and relies on it extremely, because her body is a weapon. instead, what mizu hates about herself is her face—her blue eyes. she hates herself for her hybridised racial identity, hates herself for being a racial Other. hates that she has no home in her homeland. thus it is important to note that these are not queer or feminist themes, but postcolonial ones.*

* and as a tiny aside on this subject, i really do wish more of the fandom discussion would talk about this more. it's just such an essential part to reading her character. like someone who's read homi k bhabha's location of culture and has watched this show, PLEASE talk to me so we can ramble all about how the show is all about home and alienation from community. please. okay anyway—

nevertheless, queer and feminist themes (which are not mutually exclusive by the way!) are still prevalent in her story, though they are not the main issue that she is struggling with. but she does struggle with it to some extent, and we see this especially during her marriage with mikio, where we see her struggle in women's domestic spaces.

on the other hand, though, she finds no trouble or discomfort in being a man or being around other men—even naked ones—and does not seem stifled by living as one, does not seem all that bothered or uncomfortable navigating through men's spaces. contrast this to something like disney's mulan (1998), where we do see mulan struggle in navigating through men's spaces, as she feels uncomfortable being around so many men, always feeling like she doesn't belong and that she's inherently different from them. mizu has no such experiences like this, as her very personality and approach to life is what can be categorised as typically "masculine". she is straightforward and blunt. her first meeting with mikio, she tells him straight to his face that he's old while frowning and raising a brow at him. she approaches problems with her muscles and fists (or swords), rather than with her words or mind. compare this with mulan, who, while well-trained by the end of the movie, still uses her sharp wits rather than brute strength. this is a typically "feminine" approach. it's also the approach akemi relies on throughout the show—through her intelligence and persuasive tongue, she navigates the brothel with ease. mizu, in contrast to someone like mulan and akemi, struggles with womanhood and femininity, and feels detached from it.

thus, in my opinion, mizu is not simply a man, nor is she simply a woman. she is both. man and woman. masculine and feminine. she has to accept both, rather than suppress one or the other. her name means water. fluid.

as a side note, while i do believe mizu is nonbinary, i also primarily use she/her pronouns for her, but this is a personal preference. i find it's easier to use in fanfic (singular they is confusing to write stories with, but again, that's just my feelings on it, and this is coming from someone who uses they/they pronouns). i also lean towards she/her because it's what the creators and all the official promotional copywriting of the show uses. and even though i am a "death to the author" enjoyer, i feel that when interpreting things that are left open-ended, it does help to look at the creators' take on things. also because, in general, being nonbinary simply doesn't necessitate the use of they/them pronouns. nonbinary is not just a third gender. it's about breaking the binary, in any which way, and that's exactly what mizu does, constantly.

also, i'd also like to mention that one of show's head of story even referred to her with the term "nonbinary", rather than simply "androgynous" (see pic below). and it's possible this could be a slip up on his part, in which he believes the terms are interchangeable (they're not btw), but regardless i find it a very interesting word choice, and one that supports my argument.

so anyway yeah that's my incredibly long rambling post.

TL;DR nonbinary mizu rights 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻 congrats if you reached the end of this btw. also ily. unless you're a TERF in which case fuck off. ok i'm done.

[eatyourmaker]

Alrighty then

This post might land me in some hot water, but I saw a discussion on confessions-sm, and I wanted to give my two cents on—

Why I don't think Streber is chubby

*AUDIENCE BOOS*

Okay, listen- HEAR ME OUT JESUS.

Edit: just to be clear— this is not to say you can't think he's chubby or draw him as chubby

Never that. Nor am I adverse to seeing him portrayed as chubby.

Nononono— I've just seen a lot of conversation on Streber's body type recently, and how some people think he was slimmed down in Streber's Rehearsal and I thought I'd give my thoughts on that.

The thing I see most commonly cited for Streber being chubby is this screenshot from the show

Where people say he's bottom heavy. But to me, it kinda just looks like he's got a bit of a wide stance, especially when you take into account he just got up from this pose

And had turned a bit to the left to watch Skid and Pump enter the haunted house

That is a result of him coming up from this pose

To me, to be honest, doesn't look like a chubby man to me. It looks like an average sized man, drawn at an awkward angel.

And that being said— what about these screenshots from Tender Treats?

An argument could be made that this is an awkward perspective, but with the way his torso lines down, it doesn't really give room for a bottom heavy character—

Or what about this?

Or this?

Or what about this image I use as reference from the wiki? Does he look bottom heavy here?

Because he kinda looks skinny to me, albeit slightly hunched over with a coat that tapered outward.

Another thing that could contribute to the "bottom heavy" look is the way his legs are drawn.

Unlike Radford and Kevin, Steber has the "my pants and shoes are the same" cartoon look to him. Which in the most commonly cited image, along with the awkward angle, I guess makes him look wider to some people.

But you know who else has these legs and is skinny?

Thin thief!

And by the description of chubby some people give to say Streber is canonically chubby/was canonically chubby in his first appearance, you could say the same thing about Thin Thief with these types of appearances

But we know that from his namesake that he is thin.

Please take into account different artstyles and character stylizations as well when it comes to indie animation!

Not everything is going to be perfect and consistent, but I don't really consider Streber's appearance in Streber's rehearsal or Hollow Sorrows to be "twinkified"

That being said, you can have your own opinions, and draw Streber as chubby, or even still think he's chubby, but these are my reasons why I personally don't think he is, nor do I think he was "twinkified" (that term rubs me the wrong way but I ain't going down that rabbit hole ✋🏾)

Honestly, I enjoy a lot of fanart of him being chubby more. But again, don't see it.

If you read this far than you for listening to a dumb bitch ramble about art and perspective and blah blah

God bless 🙏🏾

[yukidragon]

Sunny Day Jack - Mafia AU - Family Business

After my last post about the Blouin family in the Mafia AU for Something's Wrong with Sunny Day Jack I wound up going on a little extra ramble over on my twitter (calling it X is too weird for me) about how the family business got started. I figured I'd post it here too to make it easier to read and reference later.

It all started with a small business run by the beautiful Alma Blouin and her husband ???

I'd call him [Redacted] but that alias is taken already, so let's stick with what was written in the family tree, shall we?

I was inspired by Makes me Smile, an engaging story written by Sauce that takes place in the SunnyTime Town AU, that it actually started as a family-run traveling carnival that was a cover for more shady business. The family name and business wound up taking up some permanent roots in St. Valens because of Marceau.

There were more opportunities in that crime-riddled city to do backrooms deals, score illicit substances, and other stuff like that. St. Valens was a city rife with crooked cops and people with dubious morals. Sadly, this hasn't changed in present day. If anything, it's only gotten worse. It just can hide behind a shiny new coat of paint and colorful smiles thanks to the Blouin family taking over so many local businesses under their brand name of SunnyTime LLC.

Lucy Connolly is actually responsible for the SunnyTime brand, which is one reason why she kept her last name even after marrying Marceau Blouin. Since she was young, she wanted to make it big in the city, really clean up the town. She succeeded in making it big, but somewhere along the way she got sucked into a world full of sin and vice where her formally black and white view of morality was blurred with many shades of gray. She's still trying to do the right thing, particularly for her family and people she wants to protect, but sometimes she found it was necessary to do morally questionable things to do it. It was a slow corruption of innocence in a sense.

In a way, Jack gets his more twisted view on right and wrong from Lucy, as Marceau is a bit more up front about how messed up the criminal underworld is and their involvement in it. Jack tries to keep things as "friendly" as possible if he can help it, so to speak.

Marceau started off the business in St. Valens with an entertainment club. You had to know the right signs to get access to the good stuff they didn't show on the menu, stuff that could get you thrown in jail if you didn't have the money to pay off the cops.

One night, Lucy stopped by the club that had suddenly got so popular, thinking it was entirely legitimate, and it led to that fateful first encounter between her and Marceau.

Marceau didn't think he'd be staying in St. Valens long, even if he was trying to take advantage of the place for as long as possible, but Lucy was invested in the city, as it was her hometown. She was friendly and outgoing, and she knew a lot of people there. She grew up with them.

Lucy had a good sense for business, which places would be good to snap up for a song. She knew about the issues with many local gangs and how they intimidated local businesses into giving them a cut of their earnings to not get roughed up. She wanted to stop that sort of thing from happening so that innocent people could live their lives without fear.

Which is why the Blouin family in the present does take care of the citizens of St. Valens and stomp out more unsavory practices like human trafficking. Essentially Lucy wanted justice and went vigilante. (Insert Joker reference/joke here.) When it became clear that not everyone she tried to save was good, well…

That led into her corrupted world view and a more "ends justify the means" approach.

Marceau had been taught to watch his back and stand on his own, not having the best home life. In a sense, Lucy taught him to care more about others, that he could have someone he could trust to watch her back, and he taught her how to not let others take advantage of her and those she cares for.

Really, in the present day, the Blouins own a lot of businesses in a variety of sectors, from entertainment to scientific research to home electronics to weapons manufacturing. They're spread out across not just the SunnyTime LLC brand, but plenty of sub-companies with different names that the average person might not realize is owned by them. The SunnyTime brand has become a known trustworthy across the country and are spreading out slowly internationally.

Well… technically the family business is known internationally, just not in any public circles, and not under any brand name. Marceau alone has committed quite a few international crimes, though no one has been able to pin anything on him publicly. Lucy does a good job of keeping their public facing image squeaky clean, and she won't anyone hurt or take away any of her family.

Now that Jack is in charge, it's his turn to take care of the family and the business. Despite his issues with human touch, both them, and his sunshine, are in good hands.

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur @kurokrisps

[diiambee]

So like. Love in paradise!! Rambling and me dissecting the lyrics ahead! Prepare for a long post lol

Going to ramble more about the ending because god. It's Calypso's wording in particular that gets me.

It's no secret that the entire time she's been singing in Love in Paradise she was very insistent of sellung her Island to Odysseus, down right ignoring him when he says he has a wife and insisting even with his continued refusal—

For reference I won't mention on the matter of her SA of Odysseus due to never reading the odyssey on full myself, and i feel thar based off past songs and how Jay seems to plan to take this she'd be more a sympathetic villain than an outright evil one.

— Going back to my main point, people habe already pointed out her use of calling back to earlier character's phrases as if she's attempting to make herself more comforting for Odysseus, the use of open arms for polites, in your heart for hisother, and perhaps even the use of Ody for eurycholus.. but I want to ramble more on her phrasing for the earlier lyrics as Odysseus sings his heart out in agony.

Whether or not this was intentional— I can't help but be so scandalized (/pos) at how cleverly Jay seems to write a toxic conversations between the two. Perhaps it's more one-sided, as it seems neither of the parties are even listening to one another!

I especially want to highlight how Calypso deflects or downplay all of Odysseus' pleas here. Even if arguably you could say she cared for him and loved him, that's why she's begging him not to hurt himself— her love is so obviously not genuine, its superficial. She loves what he can give her, not who he is.

It's evident with how surface level her words of comfort are. He's screaming about agony, about all of those he's lost and how much he wants to just end it all but all her response to it are either shallow or with selfish (whether she realizes it or not, they're still selfish)

"It will be fine dear, come back inside dear, love of my life come back to paradise—" isn't really bad, its definitely comfort and a show that she cares, but it's the lyrics after that definitely highlight just how superficial her love is for odysseus, how it's not right.

"I know your life's been hard—" only time shes acknowled his troubles (in this song). "I'll stay inside your heart." Following it up with a call back to his mother.

"I love you, my dear.

I love our time here,

Life would be so much worse if you had died."

It's these lyrics in particular that truly cements, for me, how dark love in paradise really is even with a song with an upbeat middle. Jorge's a freaking genius being able to portray the sense of something is wrong even when the music tries to tell you otherwise— similar to how Calypso tries, and tries again to convince Odysseus to stay in paradise after everything he's been through, but Ody refusing because he knows this isn't the place for him.

She doesn't listen to him as he begs, and begs. She continues to speak, to try to comfort him with surface level comfort that truly doesn't help him or his state at all.. and it's with these lyrics you can really see her comfort with selfish intentions (note: I say selfishness not in a way to demean her, just to say that her words of comfort definitely come from a place of where she isn't thinking of Odysseus. She may or may not realize it, but it's still what I've observed regardless).

Yes. She truly did wish to ensure Odysseus wouldn't hurt himself, but take note of the reasons and what she says when she tries to do so— She only mentions herself, in which I mean she paints it as she's the only person Odysseus can rely on right now. She's the only person for him now. And yes.. that is quite literally true, it's just odd to me as it's as if she didn't truly understand odysseus within those 7 years. Like he hadn't with her, if you may.

Finishing this off with my belief again, I don't hate Calypso, but I don't like her either. She's a good antagonist and a good test of someone's (mine) media literacy LMFAO.. and again. This isn't me saying she didn't care at all or loved Odysseus within those 7 years, just that her love wasn't right. It never was and I doubt it was ever painted to BE right.