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luminnara · 3 years

Note

I wonder what Dick would be like trying to flirt on the lead up if the mission, trying to be smooth and cool before screaming next to Weasel. The back track of trying to be cool again after than freak out would be glorious and I would probably fall for it, lol

Dick Hertz x fem!reader

This ended up way longer than intended and I am not mad about that lol

Sfw but raunchy!

Requests for oneshots and HCs are open!

You were no stranger to the concept of the suicide squad.

Thanks to your own colorful past, and powers that you couldn’t always quite control at first, you were stuck serving out a long ass sentence at Belle Reve, the shittiest shit hole of them all. Your only escape from the mundane, high-security monotony was the occasional mission from Waller.

The Suicide Squad—more officially known as Task Force X—was the latest installment in Amanda Waller’s series of highly classified, top secret, black ops teams. She chose Belle Reve’s most infamous criminals, many of whom had extraordinary powers and even more extraordinary reputations, and tossed them together on incredibly dangerous missions. You knew she didn’t care whether you lived or died, but successfully completing such impossible tasks always cut time off your sentence, and with nothing else to do with your time, you always thought it was worth the risk.

And besides...you hadn’t died yet.

So when Waller approached you during your daily yard time, you already knew what to expect.

“Yeah, yeah.” You grumbled as you followed her into the exam room and plopped down in the same old chair. “I know the drill. I go off mission, you blow my brains out.”

“—with the explosive device implanted in the base of your skull. Correct.” Waller said, unimpressed.

“And what, you have to give me a fresh one?” You raised an eyebrow as the doctor made you lean forward. “Lose the button for the last one or something? Or are you afraid that just one won’t do the job?”

Waller looked even less impressed. “I suggest you put a lid on that attitude today.”

“Why?” You winced at the feeling of a thick needle pushing into the back of your neck. “Jesus, fuck! Seriously, how many little bombs do I need in my head?”

“Good luck, puppy.” The doctor sneered as you stood up to follow Waller back out into the corridor.

“This is a black ops mission.” She continued with her usual spiel. “Your commanding officer is Colonel Rick Flag.”

You gasped. “The Colonel Rick Flag?”

She turned to glance at you.

“I have no idea who that is.”

You could hear her sigh in exasperation. “Suit up and go outside to the transport. You’ll meet the rest of the team and fly out to Corto Maltese.”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes. Yeah, the Suicide Squad was a nice distraction from your shitty everyday life...but putting your ass on the line for someone who didn’t give a shit whether you lived or died, and who was always hovering above the button that would splatter your brains all over the wall, wasn’t exactly the greatest feeling in the world.

Waller waited as you ducked into a room to change. There was a black box waiting for you, and upon opening it, you couldn’t help but grin at the sight of your old gear. The dark gray leather suit fit like a glove, and your gun had been cleaned and polished after your last mission, the painfully bright fluorescent lights reflecting off of the barrel with a gleam. You grabbed your gloves and strapped your ammo belts on before buckling a gray carbon fiber mask on.

Wearing your own stuff always lifted your spirits. It was the suit you’d been arrested in a few years ago back in Metropolis, and after seizing it, the feds had been nice enough to give it some upgrades with newer tech. Anything to make you a better government-sanctioned killing machine, you guessed, and it’s not like you were gonna turn it down. After all, killing was how you ended up in Belle Reve in the first place, and it was one of the only things you were good at...it just made sense for Waller to want to put your near-inhuman skills to good use.

You walked out to join her again, lugging a canvas bag of equipment and supplies along behind you.

“Pick that up and carry it correctly.” She snapped as the doors at the end of the hall opened.

“Why don’t you eat my—“

You interrupted yourself by groaning at the bright sunlight as it hit your eyes, raising a hand to shield your face as you managed to spot an armored truck waiting for you.

“You’ll have a lot of new teammates.” Waller called after you. “Be on your best behavior. I’m not responsible for anything they do to you.”

“Probably just a bunch of old farts like always!” You yelled back as you jumped up into the back of the vehicle.

Two guards sat down on either side of you as you got yourself settled in. There was another woman already waiting, her skin orange, her hair in a high ponytail that seemed to be pulled through the top of her helmet. She was regarding you with very little interest, and that was absolutely fine with you. You had a few friends within the Belle Reve prison complex, and you weren’t necessarily looking for more.

The ride was short and uneventful. You passed through a few gates that took forever to open, waited for a few security checks, the usual shit. When the truck came to a halt and you hopped out again, you were at a small airbase hosting a few hangars for planes and helicopters, one of the latter already sitting outside. Guards from Belle Reve were lining the circle of armored vehicles, and as yours joined them and the back doors were opened once more, you grimaced at the bright sunlight.

“Afraid of a little sun?” The orange woman laughed, baring her teeth at you.

“Hurts my eyes,” you mumbled, jumping down after her.

You landed on pavement, looking down at your feet in an attempt to avoid the oncoming headache you knew was imminent. When your shoulder rammed into someone, though, you had to look up anyway.

What you saw wasn’t exactly what you were expecting.

A good looking blond guy was looking down at you, a cocky grin on his face. “Whoa, didn’t realize we were getting a babe this time!”

You glared at him, grateful for the mask covering the lower half of your face.

He couldn’t see you blush that way.

“Little girl’s got some ammo, huh?” He reached for one of the belts strapped across your chest,

Your hand flew up to grab his wrist and you held him in a Vice-like grip, your glare more pointed now. “Touch me, and you can see some of it from behind your eyeballs.”

Blondie whistled lowly, relaxing his arm. “You’re tough, huh? I like that in a girl.”

You dropped his wrist and rolled your eyes. “Still gonna like it when I’m ripping your balls off?”

You could swear he was swooning on his feet. “Baby, you are a goddamn tease...”

“Oy, Dickhead!” An Australian voice rang out, “back off!”

His grin faltered for a moment, obvious disappointment flashing over his face. “Oh. Got a man already. Damn.”

“Who, Boomer?” You grinned, unclipping your mask as you turned to wave at one of your only friends. “Nah, I’d never fuck that wanker.”

“I heard that!” The gold-toothed Aussie yelled.

You let out a loud laugh as you looked back to blondie.

You were caught off guard by the actual, genuine look on his face. He was admiring your smile now that your mask was off, his eyes lingering on your lips for a fraction of a second longer than they should have. He was trying to be smooth, you could tell, and most people wouldn’t have noticed something so slight...but you were an assassin working your way through a couple life sentences, and you weren’t most people.

It all only lasted a moment before the cocky grin was back. “So, after this, you wanna come back to my cell, maybe we could, you know...” he waggled his eyebrows at you, making a hip thrusting motion you almost couldn’t believe a grown criminal was making.

“Maybe focus on not dying first, slim.” You patted his chest before turning towards Boomer, leaving blondie to stare after you—or more precisely, your ass—with a dramatic, longing look.

Your friend was regarding you with an amused expression. “Flirtin’ on the job? Didn’t think you had it in ya.”

“Shut up.” You punched his arm a little too hard and he winced. “Who is that guy, anyway?”

“Dick,” Boomer said, rubbing his arm.

“Don’t call me a dick—“

“No, dumbass, that’s his name. Richard Hertz.”

“...very funny, Boomer, but there’s no fucking way his parents named their kid Dick Hertz.”

Boomer shrugged. “Believe me or don’t, I don’t care. Either way, it’s the truth.”

You scoffed and stole a glance over at your new admirer. He was tall and pretty well built, platinum blond hair short, lips pulled back in a grin that showed off straight white teeth. He was dressed in all black, two guns holstered to his chest, and as he messed with a Belle Reve guard by pretending to reach for one, he looked like an overgrown child who should not have been allowed to hold onto firearms.

“Please tell me he’s got a cooler name,” you groaned.

“Why? So you can scream it at night?” Boomer cackled. “He goes by Blackguard. He’s pretty strong from what I hear. Prolly pretty fun in bed, too.”

You wrinkled your nose and rounded on Boomer. “Shut up.”

“You like him.” Your friend grinned. “Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me. Just remember to name your kid after good ol’ Uncle Boomer.”

You gave him a rough shove and he stumbled back a few steps, laughing like a madman the entire time.

“Hey!” One of the guards barked at you.

Rather than pushing your luck with your armed babysitters, you huffed and crossed your arms over your chest. More cars were pulling up, dropping off the rest of your comrades, and while Boomer was distracted with them, you stole another glance at Dick.

He was still messing with the same guard, and was receiving some harsh warning glares in the process. Was he a complete idiot, or was he so cocky because he could actually handle it? He had to have ended up in Belle Reve for a reason. It wasn’t the type of place you went to for innocent misdemeanors. And if he was chosen for a Suicide Squad mission, that meant that his sentence was long enough to warrant risking his life to lessen it...and it also meant that he was useful.

When he winked at you, you realized with a start that he had totally noticed the way you were checking him out.

Fuck.

“Time to load up!” A voice yelled, saving you from any further embarrassment.

A few minutes later, you were strapping yourself into your seat on the chopper, pretending not to notice as Dick struggled with his seatbelt across from you. The guy sitting next to him had to help, and when you finally couldn’t help yourself, you let out a quiet laugh from behind your mask.

Dick’s head shot up to look at you, that cocky grin plastered to his face again.

“Wish you were over here helpin’ me,” he said bravely. “Rather have your hands down by my—“

“Dick.” Colonel Flag warned as he stood above you all with his gun in his hands.

Boomer let out a loud laugh at the unintentionally dirty euphemism and you snorted.

“What? Just makin’ some conversation,” Blackguard said, leaning towards you with a wolfish glint in his eyes. “You don’t mind, do ya, Princess?”

Your cheeks were heating up behind your mask, and he could see the way your eyes crinkled slightly with your smile.

God, he wished he could see your smile again.

“Hey guys, sorry I’m late!” A familiar voice said. “Had to go number two.”

“...Good to know.” Flag sighed as none other than Harley Quinn herself hopped in.

“Harley!” You called, reaching for her with grabby hands as she looked for her seat.

“Hey there, baby!” The pale blonde woman greeted, slamming her equipment bag into Savant’s head. “Hey, Boomer!”

“What’re you doin’ back in prison, Harls?” Boomer asked, hanging onto the nylon mesh cage behind him as he stretched his arms out.

“Got road rage. In a bank.” She finally found a spot between you and Javelin, and as Flag checked everyone over, the chopper took off into the air.

The lighting was dim and red, the thrumming of the helicopter blades blending in with the white noise of the pressurized cabin. Save for that, it was quiet for a while, everybody either sizing each other up, or, in Dick’s case, imagining how you looked under your suit.

“So, uh...how much longer you in for?” He asked you.

You raised an eyebrow. “Why?”

“Because I don’t exactly think I should be talkin’ about sneakin’ into your cell while Flag is here to rat me out about it,” Dick grinned.

You caught the colonel rolling his eyes.

“Hey, that never stopped anybody,” Harley said brightly.

“Boutta be in a whole big ass jungle,” Boomer elbowed you in the side. “Plentya room in there to be alone.”

You groaned as Dick gave you a sly grin.

“Y’know, this mission’ll be over in no time.” He said, stretching his arms out behind his head. “I’ve got some wicked ass powers. I got this.”

“Oh yeah?” You asked, recognizing the way he was trying to peacock and impress you. “Not worried about anything?”

“Baby, I’ll carry this whole team. Just you watch.”

“I’m looking forward to it, Dick.” You bit his name out as more of an insult, but he didn’t seem to care, giving you another wink.

He obviously thought that his flirting and posturing was working...but you were pretty sure he was just annoying. Cute, but annoying. Maybe good for a hook up here or there...but that was about it.

“We’re in a butcher’s freezer, Harls!” Boomer called from the other end of the bench. “Surrounded by dead hogs hangin’ on hooks. Only they don’t know it yet.”

“Leave ‘em alone, Boomer!” She called back with a laugh.

You chuckled at your friends, leaning your head back as you settled in for the flight. Harley was complimenting Javelin’s accent, you still didn’t know what TDK stood for, and Boomer was just starting to mess with him about the fact that all names were made of letters when the freaky weasel-thing next to Dick stole everyone’s attention.

It was one of the strangest creatures you had ever seen. Human height, covered in mangy brown fur, with big bulging eyes and a mouth full of sharp little teeth all made it both fascinating and concerning to look at, and as it made a few disgustingly wet retching sounds, Dick nodded towards it.

“Yo, is this a dog?” He asked.

“...What?” You asked in disbelief. He had to be fucking with you, right? There was no way he meant it.

“Is this thing a dog?” He repeated.

“A...a dog?”

“Yes.”

“What...what kinda dog do you think it is, mate?” Boomer asked.

“I dunno, I’m not familiar with all the breeds.” Dick gave him an incredulous look.

“I’m gonna go with Afghan hound.” TDK said.

“Since when does an afghan hound have bloody thumbs?”

“Oh my god, is it a werewolf?” Harley asked excitedly. “I’ve wanted to meet a werewolf for ever!”

Dick was already up and struggling against his restraints. “Yo, they sat me next to a werewolf?!”

“That’s not right,” TDK agreed as his neighbor slammed into him in his desperate attempt at an escape.

Boomer was laughing loudly, and you couldn’t help but join in. “You’re seriously scared of werewolves?”

Dick glanced up at you as he tried to unbuckle his seatbelt. “Yes, I fuckin’ am! So fuckin’—get me out! I do not fuck with werewolves, there is no fuckin’ way—“

“Maybe you should hop onto your new girlfriend’s lap!” Boomer cackled, jabbing a finger towards you.

“Poor baby,” you cooed, and as you saw the look in Blackguard’s eyes, you were pretty convinced that he was about to try to tear his way out so that he actually could.

“Hey, hey, he’s not a werewolf!” Flag yelled over the commotion. “He’s a weasel, he’s harmless! I mean, he’s not harmless, he’s killed 27 children, but I—I think we got him to—I think he’s agreed to this, so relax.”

“Thought you were super tough?” You asked as Dick calmed down and caught his breath. “Gonna carry the whole team?”

Rather than the snarky flirtation you expected, he actually looked a bit defeated. When you raised an eyebrow, though, he took the prompt, and the most desperate backtracking you had ever seen began.

“Yeah, well...” he scoffed, trying to give you a cool look. “Caught me off guard, that’s all. No big deal.”

“Off guard? Isn’t guard, like, in your name?” You teased, your smile genuine behind your mask. Alright...he was winning you over now. He was an idiot, but...maybe he was a lovable one.

He faltered for a second. “I-I mean, yeah, well...”

Flag was shaking his head. “Get into position to drop!”

Everyone unbuckled themselves and collected their things, lining up to jump into the ocean off the coast of Corto Maltese. When you saw that Dick was back to struggling with it, again, you smiled to yourself and leaned down in front of him.

“For what it’s worth...” you said as you pulled up on the metal tab, your hand dangerously close to his crotch, “I wouldn’t mind shacking up somewhere in the jungle with you.”

He stated at you with wide eyes, disbelief written all over his face. He really was cuter when he wasn’t putting on such a dumb, cocky facade, and he jumped up as quickly as he could to follow you.

You just laughed as you straightened up and walked away, Blackguard right on your heels. As the door opened and the big, dark ocean came into view below you, you felt a hand brushing against your hip and a firm chest press up against your back. You realized you could have stayed right there forever, patiently waiting to see how far he was brave enough to go...but you were both members of the Suicide Squad, and you had a job to do.

“I’ll see you down there, Dick,” you said, turning your head slightly to glance at him.

“See you on the other side, baby,” he grinned.

#dick hertz #dick hertz x reader #richard hertz #Richard hertz x reader #blackguard x reader #blackguard #the suicide squad #the suicide squad x reader

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funkymbtifiction · 3 years

Text

countertype

I 100% agree with you about the dangers of mistyping, which countertype can easily lead you to do. I guess one thing I'm still confused about is how different Enneagram teachers teach very different versions of the same number, which I think is adding to the problem. For example, Suzanne Stabile, in her latest book on Wholeness, depicts a 4 who longs for belonging and to feel seen - she and her former co-author Ian Morgan Cron both depict the 4 as romantic, sensitive, deep and misunderstood, a gentle soul who just wants to feel seen and understood. Enneagrammer absolutely hates this, and they say that "this sadboi 4 is actually a 9" (admin quote from their FB). But - if there's such a divergence between different teachers, then I can understand how someone would identify with a countertype. It could be that some people who believe that they are a countertype are not overlooking their real type, it's more that they have found a description that captures their real flaws but it's given different labels in different systems. Argh, my wording is probably unclear, but to give an example:

One of the most confusing things about Beatrice's FB group is people posting about being 'Social 9s'. In Beatrice's system, the Social 9 runs about wanting to earn love and acceptance through contributing to a community and helping. Tons of folks on that group have typed Mirabel from Encanto as a social 9, using Beatrice's system. Now, when I saw this, my mind boggled, because to me this is obviously a 2 description and a 2 worldview. But that's because I follow Enneagrammer and Richard Rohr's school of thought. I realised that if someone types themselves as a social 9 using Beatrice's system, they've still landed on an accurate picture of their flaws or what they need to work on, it's just given a different label (they'd be a 2 in Enneagrammer's system, so the person themselves hasn't changed, the label has).

Of course, the problem arises when you have different labels running amok across half a dozen Enneagram teachers and we fail to have a consistent system.... Thoughts?

It's like anything: different interpretations from the same source. It's how you wind up with 41,000 different denominations of Christianity. Anytime anybody doesn't think the other people have it right, they splinter off and create their own interpretation. From Jung, you have Myers-Briggs and a dozen or more splinter systems off of that, including several recent ones that are even more complicated (because... why simplify it? lol). With something theoretical, it's hard to prove another theory about it wrong, which means ... people just pick the teacher / theory that appeals most to them. (Well, not the 5s and 6s... they want the RIGHT ONE.)

I think diversity of opinion is a good thing rather than a bad thing, because no growth ever comes through a belief system without there being critical thinking involved. The more people are challenging a thing and contributing ideas to it, the more it will mature, flex out to include these new ideas, and replace outdated ones. The problem is, once you become a published "expert" on a system, it becomes a matter of pride to hold to what you said. Few lack the ENP courage of Stephen Hawking, for example, to publish one paper, hang his reputation on it, and then publish another a year later starting by saying, "I was wrong," and ripping apart his own argument.

Anyone who has published a book on the Enneagram faces a great temptation to stop searching and learning because of an assumption that "I have it all sorted out and this is the system I am going to use." The true test of something is to use critical thinking to determine whether it has stagnated or if its understanding has matured and clarified and evolved with new information and discoveries. You want to always follow the path that seems to be going forward. Newer is not always better, but it often contains advances that the earlier material lacked. Enneagrammer may have its issues and biases and blind spots, but they have done good work in expanding the definitions of subtypes, in restoring 9 as an interesting type (not just a doormat, but an active dreamer, melancholic, and romantic), and in carving out a more specific 4 that is accurate with what Najarano described (one who is never satisfied, and who often self-sabotages in their tendency to reject happiness for frustration).

I find it's best to absorb the information and then compare it with what others say about that type and with what you see in real life. I know my father is a 2, for example, and I know from his overall approach to life that he is an sp-dom. With that in mind, the over-caring, over-diligent, over-protective, and over-generous sp2 from John Luckovich's description is way more accurate than the "cute, childlike, please take care of me" 2 from Chestnut's description.

The problem with seeing Mirabel as a social 9 is -- she isn't a withdrawn stance type, she moves toward people. The social 9 doesn't become less of a withdrawn (people come to me) type just because they are social. They still vanish without a trace, leaving their friends to wonder where the hell they went, and then reappear as if nothing has happened, oblivious to the frustration they just cased. ;) The social 9s that I have known are very much not like Mirabel; they are still lost in their own little world and inclined to vanish (so that they can collect themselves, and detox themselves from others' opinions). It genuinely does not occur to them to reach out and connect to people, even when they need to do so. I have had 9 friends with social in their stacking say, "Oh, I was so lonely last week, I've been so miserable..." and then look at me, stunned, when I asked, "Then why on earth didn't you text me?" "Oh... I guess I could have done that. I didn't even think about it!" Yup. Withdrawn stance.

#question #enneagram

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chattegeorgiana · 4 years

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It's 2021 & tbh I'm happy to see you still serving the truth. So many ppl hate Sakura it's rlly sad. I see hate for her from NH & SNS mostly about her "forcing" her feelings on others like she herself didnt realize that & was stuck trying the alleviate that be growing stronger as her main plot point. Her loss of development is 99% SP NH agenda. & honestly I still wish Sasuke got w/ NO ONE, not even Naruto. He wasnt good to anyone, even if he respected them. [1]

& in general I hate the idea that Sasuke HAD to end up w/ someone romantically to try find happiness & that person should have been Naruto/Sakura/etc. bc he COULD had a happy, content, redemption arc w/o a romantic partner. Not everything great in this world is driven by romantic companionship & Sasuke is honestly not cut out for it. I wish he had platonic healing & mending arcs, not this focus on finding the "right one" to bed with.

I will go down in my grave wishing Sasuke could be aromantic/asexual representation in a positive redemption arc of him making amends & fixing bonds w/o needing the "oh so powerful & miraculous" powers of romantic fixation.

__________________________________________________________

Well my parents taught me that a lie has short legs and it won’t last for long. And all you do is deceive yourself with lying so I took that lesson to the very heart through my upbringing and tried to stay as real as I can be.

I’m the type of person who prefers a hard truth over a sweet lie any day. I have ruined relationships with people because of this way of being. Because I met people in my life that preferred to be sweet talked than told the cold truth.

I am not like that, so yeah.

Now, as for the Sakura hate... well, idk but I’ve also noticed a change in fandom support. Yes, she is still hated but the support for her grew over the years. I’m telling you, it’s one of the things I noticed from the very beginning as I came back to the fandom.

But as I said in a thread on Twitter of mine, while I loved seeing that support, there are two factors that sadden me.

1. The love is directed at Sakura Uchiha, not Sakura Haruno and

2. The fandom as a whole has become a lot similar to the other side of the fandom that used to bully us Sakura fans back in the day.

Of course, I am talking general aspects, I am sure that there are some particularities here and there. But sadly that's the truth. Which made me think about the following things. Are people really liking Sakura Haruno or Sakura Uchiha?

Because it makes me wonder... where was this love back when Sakura was getting her heroine status ripped? Where was it? Are you loving Sakura now just because she's married into the Uchiha clan? Because if so, that's just sad. And shallow. Like ppl used to call her.

And I know it might ruffle some jimmies, but it's the truth. It's an honest and pure observation, after being gone from the fandom for so long. Don't get me wrong, I love that she's loved and supported now, but I can't help but feel that she is because of the wrong reasons.

As for Sasuke, the problem is that the show rewards him with something that Naruto worked for.

We’re never really shown how he is sorry about all the misery he put everyone through.

People say that ohhh, he was a victim. But wait. So was Naruto. He didn’t turn into that?

Not saying that what he did didn’t have an impact on him, but at the end of the day it boils down to CHOICE. Which Sasuke’s plot even is about. He CHOSE to go to Orochimaru. He CHOSE to kill Itachi. He CHOSE to destroy Konoha. HE CHOSE TO WANT TO KILL THE GOKAGE at the end!

And problem is that the plot doesn’t hold him accountable for that. And I will never shut up about how in other media authors don’t excuse the antagonist for his actions.

See FMA’s Scar. It’s the EXACT same thing. He had his clan murdered. Same thing. Genocide.

But do you see FMA’s plot excusing him for his actions like Naruto does? No, it doesn’t.

And I think that’s the core problem.

Like I always said: I have a love-hate relationship with Sasuke. I love the fact that he challenges the status quo, but I hate how he goes about it and how the story gives him a free pass.

Because it all feels hollow. Not to mention is a dangerous morale to leave behind. Especially to the newer generation of young adults who are shaping their character.

It’s sends a message that if you suffered, you get a free pass to do whatever shit you want cuz at the end of the day you get a free pass without having to work hard to get your atonement.

That’s why I love the fight in Jujutsu Kaisen between Panda and Mechamaru. Mechamaru tries to victimize himself and find excuses for his actions, but Panda tells it like it is.

Just because you have suffered, it doesn’t give you the right to be an ass, basically.

As for Sakura and her development, yeah. Everyone acts like an ostrich and hide their heads in the ground pretending that it wasn’t because of SP’s favoritism and mischaracterization that Sakura wasn’t hated.

Well it was that exact same thing that made people hate her. Like I know at some point back in the day, SP had to excuse themselves that noo, they don’t hate Sakura.

Yeah right... Cuz that’s why they made an omake where she was jealous of Hinata and how Hinata was stealing the heroine status from her.

They were slowly inoculating this idea into the fandom’s perception.

And I remember how I used to tell people about it back in the day. SSers as well.

Guys Sakura is gonna be sidelined because of this. She isn’t gonna be the heroine anymore. But did someone listen? Noo, they didn’t.

Because all they saw was the fact that I was a NaruSaku fan and to hell with me. Out of the fear of NaruSaku might potentially win, they preferred to just shut up.

And then guess what? TL came and they called Hinata the heroine of Naruto’s story.

And I was like lol, I goddamn told you so. But for you it was more important for NaruSaku to lose than Sakura keeping her status, right?

As for who Sasuke should’ve ended-up with? Well that is hard to tell. Ofc, personally due to my preference for symbolism and seeing the power balance, it would’ve been nice to see him paired-up with Karin.

Cuz I feel Karin had what it took to shake him up, cuz she didn’t take his BS. But that’s just me and I would’ve totally been okay with an arc like you proposed.

However, yeah, I don’t see him with Sakura at all , I’m sorry. As much as I would’ve liked to.

Hell, I should’ve been happy as a former SS. Yet I wasn’t.

But I guess this boils down to each person’s principles. And I know where mine lie. :)

#how do i even tag this?#it's so complicated #anti-sasuke uchiha #though it's not quite anti #it just is...#cuz this is a more complex thing

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freebooter4ever · 4 years

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Hello I just finished the Pacific and I'm dying. So it's time for me to delve into the fandom and try and fulfil my poor sledgefu heart. Have any recommendations on who's blog to look at or tags? Other than yourself because I most certainly will spend a solid 5 hours going through your tags. I've already seen a lot of your art and I think it's beautiful, just an FYI.

Oh boy do I ever have recs! It was only about a year ago that I was new to the fandom myself and slowly going through @aboutthatmelancholystorm and @persipneiwrites tumblr sledgefu tags every night, reading all of it, and being totally sucked in! ^_^ (I especially suggest Persipnei’s 3:16 AU where Sledge and Snafu are rock stars!) As for art, I think the biggest collection I know of is the blog @marines-r-gay. Some of my favorite sledgefu artist blogs include @skelesocks (Ace Eugene will hold a special place in my heart forever!) @badgerms and my old favorite the-heebiejeebies who sadly disappeared and deleted their blog :( but you can still find their old art in my ‘sledgefu’ tag on my blog like here. There’s no really ‘exculsively’ sledgefu artists out there right now, but there is a LOT of amazing older stuff to be found mixed into people’s blogs! My own art/writing sledgefu masterlist can be found here.

More specific fanfic recs under the cut! I’m focusing on oldies, because I think it’s fairly easy to find the newer ones on AO3 that are still being updated ^_^

Not Quite Home by Seabright - A fix it fic that really fixes things. Post war set in New Orleans with Eugene showing up on Snafu’s doorstep. Snafu is cantankerous and very in character and he /claims/ he can’t ‘fix’ Sledge, but let’s face it that’s why they need to fix each other. Snafu has a lot of walls up and Eugene breaks all of them down in his steadfast way. This fic captures Snafu perfectly - even in little things like in the way he fidgets and moves. Also the last kiss is just...SO good.

Canon Compliant

Roadverse by Seabright - There are a few authors exclusively on AO3 that like...if you haven’t read their entire sledgefu collection yet, you gotta! Seabright is one of them. Roadverse is set after the war and Snafu takes Eugene on a roadtrip to Florida, there’s a lot of introspection, they fall in love, definitely a happy ending! The writing here is what really shines.

After The Happy Ending by Handdaddyhoosier - Another author it’s worth reading their entire sledgefu collection. This one is also set after the war and is more domestic. A lot of fluff, a lot of slice of life, a lot of Sledge and Snafu dealing with homophobia and overcoming it (!!). Through it all Snafu and Eugene remain sooooo much in love that they’re stronger together and...yeah...it’s good.

Christmas Even Will Find Me by SOMETHINREAL - My favorite canon compliant Sledgefu Christmas fic! It’s just perfect! Everybody is all together again after the war for Christmas and Eugene and Snafu are playing their own little dance between each other in the corner...they’re adorable. Plus there’s a happy ending!

Maybe You’ll Think Of Me When You’re All Alone by SOMETHINREAL - A very very good fix it fic for after the war. They’re both broken but they’re together and falling in love all over again, yay! I live for first pining and emotional kiss scenes and this is one of the best!

These Foolish Things Remind Me of You by Spoondragon - Merriell is quirky and weird and collects things and his last line in the fic is gOLD. Basically them being cute, with a first kiss. I highly rec ALL of spoondragon’s sledgefu fics!

To Make Much of Time by Hueligan - FIX THE TRAIN SCENE. I will read almost any variation of that train scene where Snafu makes it right, and this one does! AND THEN RUINS IT. So fair warning, you will fall in love with this fic but then it will break your heart. Kinda like Snafu. But it’s ok cause then you can go read one of the OTHER many fix it fics and mend it again.

Tilled Earth by Killerqueenie - Okay, this is one of my absolute FAVORITES. Snafu finds Eugene playing farmer boy in a small town outside of Mobile ten years after the war and Snafu signs himself on as a ranch hand. This one ACTUALLY fixes the train scene. Eugene is prickly and untrusting and Snafu has to earn his right to waltz back into his life. And oh gosh the love each other so so much!

The Magic Helmet by jspringsteen - Cute adorable and totally in character, canon compliant and not actually sledgefu except for some delightful hints that they are into each other more than they let on. It’s just such a great moment for Snafu’s character that I’ve reread this on multiple occasions.

All You Got by ssstrychnine - Another fix it fic (I know, I love these). This follows canon so well it’s seamless and only adds subtle touches of love between Gene and Snafu - so very believable as a part of the actual show. This author has four fics on AO3 for sledgefu and I suggest reading them all!

The Jazz Lights of New Orleans by Gracefully - Yet ANOTHER fix it fic! Give me them all!!!

Like It’s Only You And Me by SJTrinity - Snafu is an artist in this so of course I’m going to biased, but this is one of my absolute favorite college AU’s. All our favorite characters are there, including Bill, Burgie, Andy, and Eddie (and even Pops! as a fatherly figure to Snafu though he’s only referenced). Snafu is as chaotic as ever. The romance is hot! There are parts where I almost bust a gut laughing. Also anytime Eugene gets all haughty and bossy with his little furrowed brow over Snafu that’s like A+ for me.

Learning Curve by Seabright - ok THIS fic defines ultimate pining over Gene for me. I have never related to Snafu more. There’s a description of Eugene swimming in a pool that just..yeah...I have feelings. Anyway, it’s a college AU that is tragically UNFINISHED and will rip your heart out, BUT the same author also has a whole bunch of more canon related fic where the two of them do get together, so that eases the sting a little.

F.M.L by @badgerms - I maybe have a thing for swimmers, but I love this swimming college AU especially because it’s in Gene’s POV but done so well that it feels real. This fic also delves into mental illness and mental self flagellation (there are some moments that hit REAL hard if you’ve ever had eating disorders). But on top of all that, I feel like lollki really captured what is so magnetic about Snafu, and by having Gene put him on this impossible pedestal it kinda reflects what a lot of us in the fandom do with his character. Snafu makes his existence look effortless and thoughtless, Gene is incredibly jealous of how Snafu just lives, their competition is ENTHRALLING.

The Kind Of Stuff That Only Prince Would Sing About by @stolperzunge A coffee shop AU that has Sledge and Snafu just slowly and sweetly falling in love. This one is from Snaf’s pov and since I identify with him more you know I’m gonna love it lol! There are some GREAT funny lines, Snafu has personality in spades. Eugene is a grandad hipster type who also writes erotica....I dunno it’s all amazing go read it.

There Will Be Better Days by SydneyCarton - High school AU. As someone who had a fairly shitty high school experience and many bad holidays, this is...cathartic. Gene is definitely more the caretaker here, he saves Snafu in a way that’s just as strong as when he picked him up on the battlefield. But it’s all emotional, and Snafu is this scared prickly kid. And Gene is the honor roll kid who has to play the role of best friend secretly in love with the one person who matters most to them. This author never wrote anything else for Sledgefu and I wish they had!

Okay, that’s a whole bunch! There’s even more in my aO3 bookmarks! This list is just me going through my bookmarks and selecting the ones that I especially remembered and is by no means exhaustive of all my favorites in this fandom. Joining the Pacific train late means there’s a whole lot to choose from and explore...but it also means the list of active blogs is short and not a lot of new content gets posted every day :( I think the Sledgefu community is still going pretty strong, though! Welcome!

#sledgefu #Anonymous

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snkpolls · 4 years

Text

SnK Episode 62 Poll Results (for Anime Only Watchers)

The poll closed with 73 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results for the Anime Only Watchers’ poll. If you wish to see the results for the Manga Readers’ poll, click here.

Anime only watchers, beware of spoilers if you venture over to the manga readers’ poll results.

RATE THE EPISODE 68 Responses

Again, the response to last week’s episode was notably positive, with 98.5% of responses giving it a score of 3 or higher. Marley and Me is still going strong!

Gave a 3 because while I don't give a rats ass about the Warriors or their "tragic" sob story, the animation and voice acting was on par

It was way better than the first two of the season I liked it a lot!!

I think it was one of the best episodes not only in this season, but in the entire show. It shows deepness of the characters in Attack on Titan and shows as the other side in such an amazing way. It was brilliant.

I think the episode was pretty good

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING MOMENTS WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 68 Responses

Eren’s formal reveal as the amputee soldier took the biggest piece of the pie, with 45.6% of respondents enjoying that scene the most. Trailing behind that is Reiner’s tragic suicide attempt with 10.3% of the vote, followed closely behind by RBA’s side of Shiganshina at 8.8%.

Flashbacks were important. And eren intro was epic

Reiner standing up looking like an undead zombie after getting clobbered by Annie and then stating "Reiner is dead...I will be Marcel" was just...Wow. Just loved seeing the wall breach from RBA's perspective. Reiner gains more dimensions and complexity with each episode and I'm here for it! Bless MAPPA :-)

WE GOT THE FULL ED LAST WEEK. AFTER SEEING IT IN ITS ENTIRETY, HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT IT NOW? 66 Responses

Although just over 59% of responses gave the ED a decidedly positive grade (with praise going towards both imagery and the song), almost 20% of responses simply thought it was “okay”. A relatively equal amount of responses alternated between liking the animation and disliking the song and vice versa. Only a few seemed to dislike both.

Didn't watch/care

ON A SCALE OF 1 TO 5, HOW MUCH DID YOU ENJOY THE SEQUENCE INTRODUCING ALL OF MARLEY’S TITANS? 67 Responses

The sequence introducing all of Marley’s Titans has gotten rave reviews, with 97% of responses rating it positively. Truth be told, I’d given it a 5 myself, if I could… But I can’t, I’m just a mysterious voice, detailing the results of this poll.

OUT OF ALL THE TITANS THE MARLEY MILITARY HAD 9 YEARS AGO, WHICH ONE WOULD YOU WANT TO HAVE? 67 Responses

For the question regarding possible inheritance of the Titans, we’ve gotten a rather colorful pie chart! Annie’s Female Titan is clearly leading with just under a third of those who took the poll picking it out as their favorite option. Reiner’s Armored is taking second place with almost 21%, followed by Zeke’s Beast at almost 18%. Bertholdt’s Colossal and the Series Mascot is, surprisingly, at just under 12%, with Pieck, unsurprisingly, bringing up the rear.

WHICH OG WARRIOR CANDIDATE WOULD YOU WANT TO ADOPT? 64 Responses

When it comes to possibly adopting a warrior candidate, we’ve gotten even more pie flavors! Reiner is at number one with just over 20%, with Pieck and Annie going into second place, both with just under 19%. Bertholdt’s in third place, with a little over 14%. Marcel and Zeke bring up the rear and it seems like no one wants to adopt poor little Porco. Just over 20% seem to not want to participate in this little scheme for various reasons.

A LOT OF THE SHIGANSHINA BREACH HAS REUSED QIT ANIMATION FROM PAST EPISODE - THOUGHTS? 67 Responses

When it came to the fact that a lot of the Shiganshina Breach Animation was reused for the episode, most seemed to respond either positively or indifferently. Just over 58% thought just that the old animation flowed decently with MAPPA’s new style, while 16.4% didn’t really care. Almost 12% expressed nostalgia for WIT’s style of animation and 9% noted that while they weren’t fans of this move, they understood the reason for it. Whoever was left noted that they either really preferred MAPPA’s new style or really didn’t like this move from MAPPA, as a whole.

KAJI YUKI HAS LOWERED HIS VOICE A BIT TO DEPICT AN OLDER EREN. THOUGHTS? 67 Responses

A bit of a lopsided result for this one. 71.6% of all responses noted that they enjoyed Yuki Kaji’s move of lowering his voice to depict an older Eren. 16.4% states that they didn’t care and the rest either expressed further “enthusiasm” for this move with one person noting that they preferred younger Eren’s voice range.

I didn’t even notice

WE’VE LOST COUNT ON HOW MANY TIMES WE’VE SEEN MARCEL GET EATEN. BUT OF THE OPTIONS BELOW, WHO DID IT BEST? 67 Responses

When it came to seeing Marcel biting the dust numerous times, it turned out that we have plenty of options and styles to choose from. 37.3% said that they preferred MAPPA’s depiction of the event, with just under a third preferring Isayama’s newer depiction. Bringing up the rear with 22.4% were those who preferred WIT’s depiction and 7.5% who like Isayama’s older depiction the best.

DO YOU THINK THAT REINER WAS CORRECT, THAT MARLEY WOULD HAVE HAD ALL OF RBA EATEN IF THEY HAD FOUND YMIR AND RETURNED HOME IMMEDIATELY? 65 Responses

In what is perhaps the most divisive question of the poll, it would seem like those who thought Marley wouldn’t have had all of RBA eaten if they had found Ymir and returned home immediately came out on top, with almost 57% arguing they would have either threatened the kids before keeping them around or became understanding from the get-go. 43.1% dissented and thought Marley would have, in fact, done so.

Don't think so because we only saw 1 other warrior candidate and when the warriors failed in the Shinganshina arc they didn't pass on Reiner or Zeke's powers.

Marley = maybe. Zeke = would have been understanding

Maybe just eat Ymir

WHAT’S THE FORECAST FOR TONIGHT? 66 Responses

For the question about tonight’s (or rather, the night when the fanbase took the poll) weather, we’ve received a multitude of responses. From the most popular to the least, we’ve had people predicting a cloudy night, a snowy night, clear skies, a rainy night and finally, a stormy night. On the other hand, just over 18% didn’t seem to care.

Call if hail at you’ll be late for muster

freckled Jesus getting crucified, RIP Marco

Fuckkkkk Berttttt

Hangman

it's gonna rain titans

Meh, don't care about Bertolt

REINER GRADUATED 2ND FROM THE TOP IN THE 104TH, BUT DID YOU EXPECT HIM TO BE AT THE BOTTOM OF THE SELECTED WARRIOR CANDIDATES? 65 Responses

Reiner’s surprisingly poor performance during his years as a Warrior candidate surprised most of those who took our poll, with 40% expressing just that. Almost 37% thought this development made him more relatable as a character, with the rest either noting that they either didn’t care or that this portrayed the 104th in a somewhat poorer light (lol).

I feel like his traumatic experience of watching someone he grew up with die and his resolve to become more reliable and strong pushed him to reach the point that he did considering he also outranked both Annie and Bertolt.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THE FACT THAT REINER IS HALF-MARLEYAN? 66 Responses

When it came to the fact that Reiner turned out to be half-Marleyan, almost 38% thought the said fact gave more depth to Reiner’s character. Just over 24% thought it made him even more tragic and 18.2% hope that said detail will have more significance in the future. The rest stated that they didn’t care.

I think it's sad for Reiner, but a nice twist. I was wondering what happens to half Eldian/Marleyans so it was nice to see the result from a more cultural and political standpoint.

GALLIARD’S FIRST NAME IS ACTUALLY “PORCO.” THOUGHTS? 66 Responses

For the reveal of Galliard’s first name actually being “Porco”, we’ve had 45.5% of responses understanding why the big man himself decided to go by his last name instead. 13.6% asked what Isayama was thinking when giving him that name. The rest either expressed further sympathy for the boy or thought it was a decent name for character.

I can't stop thinking of him as Porky Pig now. He had such a cool surname too xD

DO YOU THINK THAT THE RIFT BETWEEN REINER AND PORCO CAN BE RESOLVED? 66 Responses

When it came to deciphering the rift between Reiner and Porco, a bit over 40% thought that the rift would never be able to “go away”, with Porco disliking Reiner for various reasons. Almost a third dissented and thought that it would be possible, provided Porco either learned of Marcel’s actions or kept working with Reiner for longer periods of time. The rest weren’t sure exactly.

It seemed like the rift wasn't really prominent in episode 2, so maybe it's already resolved.

IN THAT SAME VEIN, DO YOU BELIEVE PORCO’S COLD FEELINGS TOWARD REINER ARE UNDERSTANDABLE AND/OR JUSTIFIED? REMEMBER: HE DOESN’T KNOW ABOUT MARCEL’S ACTIONS. 65 Responses

When it came to a similar question, most (67.7%) thought Porco’s cold feelings towards Reiner were understandable, but not justified. 20% thought they were, in fact, both understandable and justifiable. 10.8% thought they were neither and there was one sole person who stated that they didn’t care.

REINER AND ANNIE WERE REALLY ROUGH ON EACH OTHER. WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THAT? 66 Responses

Reiner seems to have even poorer relations with Annie and this episode surely confirms it. Almost 50% were surprised to find out just how poor said relations were. A third stated that they believed the two still cared about each other, just well, “deep down”. A little over 15% predicted this hatred, on the other hand.

Annie went full "Levi on Eren" on Reiner. I knew they had a tense relationship, this just confirmed my suspicions. I don't think they hate each other.

HOW DID YOU FEEL GETTING TO SEE MORE BERTOLT AFTER HIS UNTIMELY DEATH LAST SEASON? 66 Responses

Seeing Bertolt again in the story was generally treated positively by most, with almost 44% stating that they enjoyed his extra screen time. A bit over 20% stated that they really missed him and were sad to see him, knowing what happens in the future. On the other hand, a little over 21% openly expressed their dislike for the character. Just over 12% simply stated that they didn’t care.

Dude had it rough, at least the suffering is over now.

i barely care about him... he's just there. he adds nothing to the show compared to other warriors. his personality is way too boring and bland.

This doesn't make me sympathize with him in any way shape or form

I'm so glad to see Bertholdt... Mappa did him cute as a kid and hot all grown up.

ANNIE AND KENNY: WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THIS UNLIKELY ENCOUNTER? 66 Responses

When it came to seeing Kenny and Annie’s unlikely encounter, the responses were rather distinctive. A little under a third thought it was random, but enjoyable. Others stated that they were just happy to see more Kenny or Annie. Some noted that Annie’s survival rate when taking on the Ackermans is impressive. Finally, just under 11% noted that they didn’t care for it.

I thought they did it as fan-service bc Kenny = popular

It was a bit too short to be impactful in my opinion.

I wish we saw more Kenny

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS AFTER LEARNING THAT REINER IS THE ONE WHO PUSHED FOR THE ASSAULT ON WALL ROSE AFTER TRAINING WITH THE 104TH FOR 3 YEARS? 66 Responses

Upon learning about Reiner’s push for attacking Wall Rose after 3 years of living with the 104th, the fanbase came out to be rather divided. Whereas a bit over a half expressed at least some sympathy for him, the rest were sharp in their critique. A few stated that they didn’t care, however.

HOW DID YOU FEEL SEEING REINER ON THE EDGE OF SUICIDE? 66 Responses

Seeing Reiner on the verge of suicide brought out a lot of sympathy for the man himself, with people expressing degrees of sympathy for him. A little under a third simply noted that this is a dark story. However, a few also stated that they didn’t feel much sympathy for him due to his previous actions.

besides the fact that this whole episode was dark, this particular scene made the episode more and more uncomfortable and depressing :( can someone please hug him and tell him that everything is gonna be fine?

WHAT WAS YOUR REACTION TO THE REVEAL THAT EREN WAS THE AMPUTEE SOLDIER FROM THE LAST EPISODE? 66 Responses

The reveal that Eren was the amputee soldier from the previous episode is another one of this series’ twists and turns. Sadly, a third of the responses had already been spoiled about it. On the other hand, another third or so seemed to have an inkling and were happy to see a confirmation in this one. Just over 21% were simply in shock.

I knew from his voice

He's learnt to control his regeneration o.0 I wonder what else he has learnt. Also guessed last episode.

EREN OBSERVES THAT FALCO MAY BE TRYING TO PROTECT “A GIRL” FROM INHERITING THE ARMOR - IMPLYING FALCO MAY HAVE FEELINGS FOR GABI. WHAT DO YOU MAKE OF THAT? 66 Responses

When it came to Love Doctor Eren Yeager, more than 50% thought that this development showed his maturation over the course of the story (and 4 years, specifically). Some thought that it didn’t really mean anything, while others looked to a bit more romantic answer. Finally, some thought he was being influenced by the memories of his father or his father’s Attack Titan predecessor.

Don't know if Eren was implying that or if he was trying to gain intel.

BE HONEST - DOES EREN WORK THE HOBO LOOK? 66 Responses

When it came down to seeing Eren’s new design, the majority actually seemed to be more interested in seeing his “manbun” one, as seen in the trailer. Almost 20% thought it was his coolest design to date! The rest either seemed to prefer one of his earlier designs or thought that he looked kinda gross. And some people were just thirsty.

Cool change. Doesn't look "better", but does make him look more serious/battle-scarred.

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

i was super confused at first, but after a lot more research im completely caught up w the story and very excited for whats to come!

Would've enjoyed even more REINER

Definitely ready for more. I always assumed our old team has been lurking on this side of the wall ever since ep 1 (call me crazy, but was that my mans Jean who bought the newspaper??) anywaY, I can’t wait for the reveal/ambush WhatevEr it is they got planned. You know Armin’s behind this shit. Let’s get ittttt

I need to see Levi already!! I feel like I’m going through withdrawal

The artwork was really nice, same with the animation. I thought the bit with Annie and Reiner was too intense though I felt kinda sick watching it. Also, they showed the scene in the trailer where Reiner is talking to Eren when they were in training and also when he was trying to commit suicide but the audio was different from the visual so I'm curious now if Reiner like tries to have Eren kill him but Eren and co want to interrogate him??? So he's like "why won't you let me die?". Also, I like Falco even more now, seems like a great and important character.

Seeing the Titans normally animated makes the cgi hurt more :(

it gave a lot of clarity cant lie

Reiner's backstory with his dad broke my heart. I thought he took it well. For Marcel to die afterwards and the warriors to be pushed down that path was terrible. I also love how Annie was really against attacking the Eldians, and voiced her disgust, and it felt organic. It didn't feel like it was forced in to show viewer thoughts. The episode made me appreciate Annie's maturity from a young age and emotional depth, and the fact that this was achieved with Reiner as the main focus makes it amore impressive.

mappa > wit. no doubt. the cinematography was a m a z i n g. it was very aesthetically pleasing to watch.

Why did the smiling titan ignore Bertholt?

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 65 Responses

Thank you again to everyone who participated! We’ll see you again after next episode.

#snk poll #snk polls #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #snk #aot #snk spoilers #snk s4

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just-things-things · 4 years

Note

Oh my gosh Assassin!Peter Parker GO! Also as a bonus question favorite and least favorite fanfiction tropes.

Ah, yes, I love me some assassin Peter Parker. Honestly, I just love the concept of evil Peter sooooo much, so thank you for the ask! I hope this is good for you!

Also, to answer your questions, I love all fanfiction tropes, but I'm probably going to have to go with "there's only one bed" and "slow burn fics" as my favorite tropes. I also love writing Alternative Universe Au's, but I'm not confident enough to post them. They're kind of really out there. :/ And the only trope I don't like that much/just haven't found a good story for is Peter teaching an older Morgan to become Iron Woman. I really like the concept, but just haven't found a good fic done for it. Someone should DEFINITELY leave suggestions in the comments :)

Lastly, I'm writing this at work, lol, so it's a bit rushed:

_____

He likes to think everything he's done is for a good cause. Really, if you only look at the minimal details, truly you'd see the nature behind his decisions. There's no point in watching how he kills people, or the satisfactory look he gets when collecting his prize.

At least, that's how Peter looks at it. Peter Parker - the more humane side of his alter ego. He remembers clearly when his job - his life - really started.

It was a cold September, the start of a freezing winter. He remembers being so scared for a moment before his insides were filled with pure rage and vengeance.

Looking back on it, his reaction might have been normalized for someone who had witnessed their Uncle's murder. And he was only thirteen at the time, young enough to substitute jail for juvenile detention.

After cradling Ben and listening to, "With great power, comes great responsibility," for the last time, he realized his responsibility. He was responsible for two things.

Ben's untimely death. And two:

For catching his Uncle's murderer.

Maybe his decision making was far fetched, maybe Ben never wanted this to happen, but in a panicked moment, Peter fled the seen for a man in a hooded jacket and 380 ACP.

He chased the guy five blocks to catch him. To tackle the man in an abandoned warehouse and when on top, he found a renowned strength. He had never throw a punch before. He never remembered being that strong.

While the punching continued, Peter wasn't planning on killing the criminal, but in their flurry of movement and the man reaching for his gun, he freaked out. It was either kill or be killed. He didn't want to join Ben yet, he couldn't leave May alone. He had a responsibility.

So, twisting the other's wrist and catching the gun mid-air, he aimed and shot two bullets. The man spasmed as Peter rolled over, taking two large breaths and throwing the weapon into a corner. He laid there for what seemed like hours, trying to find a way out.

In the end, the body ended up in the Hudson River. Peter returned home - bloody and bruised - to find May gone. A note was left to go to the local police station with twenty dollars on top.

He didn't go. Instead, he used his extra time to get the grime off himself in the shower. Afterwards, he called May to tell him he was home and would take a taxi as soon as he could. She yelled at him for ten minutes, wondering where he had been, why he didn't answer his phone or call earlier, in the end she broke down, apologizing and saying she'd be home in a few minutes.

By the time she returned, he had finished brewing some tea and cooking a couple of eggs. It was already four in the morning. Peter held his Aunt for the next three hours. Letting her grieve, letting himself listen to his own thoughts. He didn't cry, didn't feel bad about the man he killed - by now he was comfortably numb.

He knew he had to be more careful. He knew he had to figure out why he could punch so hard, what other things - powers - his body had obtained.

And when he found out his unnatural ability and crazy amouts of strength, Spider-Man would be born.

When he first took on the mantle and name of a "Superhero," that's all he intended it to be. To save people and help get other out of harm's way. To be the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.

The first illegal thing he did in his beginner suit was break into Oscorp. After months of fighting crime in a ratty sweatshirt, he was sure need of an upgrade.

So, with Peter's high IQ he produced a flashdrive with Oscorp's codes and firewall breakthroughs. Everything about the company could be found on a tiny store-bought chip.

Sneaking into the place was harder, making sure to use the right codes and not set off any alarms was difficult, but once he was in and posing as an intern, things had ran smoothly. He worked diligently in a lab, constructing a functional suit with new designs and better usages.

Getting out was simpler, deciding to strut out the front entrance with his new suit in a backpack gave him an adrenaline rush, causing him to run to a bathroom to change for patrol. That would lead to his second illegal action in a suit.

Even though he was excited, the streets surely were not. About to finish his sandwich from Mr. Delmar (it was on the house) and return to the apartment, a lady yelled out from below his streetlamp, "Hey, you're that Spider-Guy, right?"

Startled, he nodded and hurriedly pulled his mask down, "Uh, yeah. Spider-Man, actually, but that's me, do you need help with anything, or something?"

"Yeah, I do. But we shouldn't really talk about it here. C'mon down, little spider." Peter gulped, conflicted on running or following the women. Looking up and down the street, he found it empty.

"Why can't we talk right here?" Realization dawned on him and he dropped his voice to a whisper, "Is someone following you."

The women nodded. Peter hopped down to her level, taking her arm in his, "Do you think we can pass as a couple. I mean - I'm wearing a suit."

"I noticed, it's new. I've been looking for you." Closer now, Peter could see the women's features more sharply. Hazel eyes shaped with cutting-edge cheekbones and wavy-ginger hair.

"Who's following you?" There was no point in beating around the bush.

"My husband, he's about two blocks behind with a pocket knife."

Peter glanced at the store they passed, "Do you want me to go take care of him. I can call the police and have him sent to jail, only if you have proof, though."

"Don't believe me?"

"I do, but I also know the cops won't do anything without evidence. It'll be a lost cause then."

She sighed, "I don't want to get the cops involved. I want you to kill him."

Spider-Man stopped, "What?"

The women pulled him into an alley way and oped her purse. She pushed a smaller bag into his hands, "I need you to kill him."

Peter was shaking, he didn't understand. He slowly opened the bag, it was full of wads of cash, "That's seven thousand dollars. Go kill him, call me when it's done." He watched as the women pulled out a paper and pen, scribbling down her phone number.

"I can't."

She stared at him, almost like she could see through the mask. Groaning, she replied, "Fine," she ripped the money out of his hands and began leaving the alley way.

Peter froze. Seven thousand dollars. That was alot of cash. And it was rent week, he knew May couldn't pay it. He also knew he needed a new computer. Decisions. It seemed that's all his life was right now. So many decisions.

May needed the money. It was his responsibility to help get it for her.

"Wait! I'll, I'll take the job." The women looked over her shoulder and grinned,

"I knew you would, I'll be waiting."

By the time he left the crevice between the buildings, the husband was already on their street.

Peter swung and landed in front of the man, startling him. The boy could already tell from his drunken-state that this would be easy.

"He has a pocket knife," the words rang in his head. Peter looked down and sure enough there was a bulge in his pants in the form of a small dagger.

"Is that a knife or are you just happy to see me?"

The man shoved him, "Beat it, Kid. I don't have time fore games."

"Yeah?" Peter cocked his head, "Neither do I." He shoved his knee in between the man's legs, watching him double over and then using his strength to throw him into a post.

With the other's uneasiness he webbed his chest and catapulted him into the air. Climbing in the apartment and swinging the man upwards to finish things on the roof.

He didn't feel bad when the guy crashed against the fire escape. He was unconscious when they reached the top, his breath evened out and forehead already swelling. Peter stared.

After a moment, he fished out the knife and undid it. This would be the easier part, he knew where to position the blade and where to put pressure against the man's skin.

He didn't take honors biology for nothing.

Finishing the job, he called the women after sending a picture of her husband. With the seven thousand dollars he should invest in a burner phone.

"Good work, Spider-Man. I have another job for you, but that can wait till later. Get rid of the body and the cash is yours. I'll leave it behind the dumpsters." She hung up before he could say anything. That left him with a dead man and a prize to collect.

He later found himself counting the cash and debating on when he should call the women back. He knew the answer, though. He shouldn't. You need the money, he reminded himself.

In good news, he received a new laptop and burner phone all while sneaking May money for rent at the end of the week. He still had a shit ton of good money left. Even treating May and him to dinner. She never questioned anything.

After Peter calling the mysterious alley way women back on his newer phone, things began to slowly progress.

It led to him taking on another case for her and her pointing him into the direction of others in need of his help. He started going for more and more people, getting more money, taking even more people, all while maintaining the name, "Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man."

No one suspected a thing and his clients list kept growing. He didn't feel bad, hell, he only killed bad people. In his mindset, how could he be doing anything wrong?

Over the course of three years, his "buisness" grew and he upgraded his suits and weaponry. Most of the time, he preferred just his strength and webs, sometimes a knife if necessary, it was less of a mess, anyway. Of course, some jobs required the guns and larger daggers. They were easy enough to obtain, with his status between the dark web, anything was easy to obtain.

He never didn't take a job as long as the work could be done in New York, it was simpler that way.

There was one job he couldn't take, the one that frightened him the most and ironically had the largest bounty he'd seen. He was shocked when he pulled the invitation up. Two million dollars for the one and only May Parker.

_____

Ooh, a cliffhanger! I don't know if there will be a second part, sorry! Maybe if this gets enough love I'll consider! Speaking of, there will be an updated master list of things to drop in my ask box, hopefully tonight! Of course, if you have any other ideas or want me to do a second part of something, just ask! Thank you for the ask @etherithical

#assassin peter parker

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bilbao-song · 5 years

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tagged by @quite-actually-a-nacho for this little tag thing :^) thanks! i haven’t done one of these in awhile so yay lol

Name: amy

Nickname: i don’t really have one :/

Gender: it’s a girl

Star sign: ♒️ (same so i’m leaving that there)

Current time: 8:21 PM

Favorite artists: honestly i have like nine thousand but to name a few: ELO, bee gees, jim croce, cat stevens, dean martin, the beatles, the proclaimers, gerry rafferty, todd rundgren, and???honestly almost anything that could potentially go into the “classic rock” category, and then for more modern things i like vanessa carlton, regina spektor, nicole atkins, and gin wigmore. tbh it’s weird but i tend to prefer male singers on older music and female singers on newer music. i genuinely have no idea if this is a coincidence or if there’s some underlying factor that has caused this without me noticing but.......whätever

Song stuck in my head: “ruins” by cat stevens bc i was just listening to it tbh

Last movie I saw: presumably some kind of horrible documentary, if that counts

Last thing I googled: i don’t remember what it actually was but the last google tab open on my phone is for “e learning days” (100% just because i was like “wow i’m glad we didn’t have e-learning days while i was in school” and googled it)

Other blogs: i don’t have any!! at least not that i actually use; i have like 900000 saved urls that i’m never going to use

Do I get asks: yes but they kind of come and go in waves lol

Reason for URL: this (see also: this just bc i like this version, if anyone’s interested lmao)

Followers/Following: 5,544 followers, 4,481 following which is like. slowly closing in on the actual limit

Lucky number(s): i don’t have any in particular

Currently wearing: a speed racer t-shirt from 1993, snakeskin-patterned pajama pants, a robe, and sequined house shoes. in other words: high fashion

Dream job: someone very rich and very bored decides they want to pay me to talk about ELO and drink coffee

Dream trip: honestly i just miss maine right now :( but i’m always down for going to either US coast (which is still pretty vague but whatever)

Favorite food: salmon, orange chicken, honestly almost any kind of seafood (except for oysters, squid, and all things squid-adjacent), most salads, mushrooms, chicken tenders!!!!! um!!!! tbh there are too many things to list. and that’s not even including desserts :/

Instruments: i have some degree of piano skills but i haven’t done it in a long time, which is mildly tragic

Favorite song: i have too many!!!! i cannot choose

tagging: @cethbanshee @ihideinmymusic @hell5bell5 @moldybreadguys @eddiecranes @ashaparekh @zucchinigal @cucumber-castle @cantblamethestarsinjuly and anyone else who wants to! i feel like i’m forgetting a lot of people i usually tag but i’m out of practice rip

#thank you!!#long post #not really but i feel compelled to tag it with that idk #about me

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justanalto · 4 years

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it’s q&a time!

tagged by the lovely @besidemethewholedamntime!

1. What is the color of your hairbrush? light blue or red, depending on whether my hair is wet or dry

2. Name a food you never eat. there isn’t much I don’t eat, but if I had to choose, a very specific melon candy that just tastes nasty.

3. Are you typically too cold or too warm? too cold! I got too used to university heating and now I’m cold all the time

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago? willing myself to start my friend’s profile so I can build up my portfolio before deciding to get on Tumblr. or i was scrolling through Tumblr. i’m not sure.

5. What is your favorite candy bar? i’m pretty partial to a good kit kat bar, especially because they come in so many flavors!

6. Have you ever been to a professional sports event? how do we define professional? because I’ve been to a baseball game, but i don’t know if we’d call college sports games ‘professional’.

7. What is the last thing you said out loud? one of the lyrics i was harmonizing along to absentmindedly. couldn’t tell you which song it was, though...

8. What is your favorite ice cream? mint chocolate chip!

9. What was the last thing you had to drink? tea! leftover from this morning and kind of cold unfortunately

10. Do you like your wallet? yes! i bought it at camden market when i was in London last year. it’s made completely of cork and i call it my adult wallet because i spent my college career wandering around with my wallet on a lanyard/attached to my phone case.

11. What was the last thing you ate? ....a salad

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? lol no

13. The last sporting event you watched? the super bowl, I think? after that they sort of cancelled sports

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn? either cheesy or caramel. no in between.

15. Who is last person you sent a text message to? one of my friends, because we were discussing her diet coke intake

16. Ever go camping? i have! not for a long time, though.

17. Do you take vitamins? i’m trying to on a regular basis, LOL. when i do i literally have to take a whole mouthful of ‘em.

18. Do you go to church every Sunday? nope!

19. Do you have a tan? i haven’t had a proper tan since July 2018 because i spent last summer in the north of england/interning in an office environment. and now of course we’re all stuck at home

20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza? Chinese food, because i can guarantee it won’t make me sick!

21. Do you drink soda with a straw? it depends. is it out of a can or a cup? or a mug? where am I? if it’s a can, no, I’ll just chug it straight out. if it’s in a cup, probably. in a mug, i’m probably at home, so no again.

22. What color socks do you usually wear? white ones....

23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit? i live by the motto that you can speed to exactly 5 miles per hour above the speed limit.

24. What terrifies you? heights, this goddamn pandemic and turning out to be worthless

25. Look to your left, what do you see? my door with my honors college hat hanging on the doorknob

26. What chore do you hate? washing the goddamn bathtub. i HATE cleaning tile grout.

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? the Australian students I met while I was on exchange. either that or finding nemo

28. What’s your favorite soda? ginger ale. is that a soda? if not then Pepsi. I do miss vimto tho

29. Do you go into a fast food place or just hit the drive-thru? usually i go in, but I can be convinced to use the drive-thru.

30. Who’s the last person you talked to? my dad. I asked him if he wanted me to make him a salad for lunch.

31. Favorite cut of beef? ribeye, probably.

32. Last song you listened to? ‘Grow As We Go’ by Ben Platt

33. Last book you read? I’ve been stuck on the same book for weeks -- “Into the Interior’ by Michelle Cliff.

34. Favorite day of the week? it’s quarantine, what are days anymore. jk i’d probably have to say either Mondays or Wednesdays, mainly because I know what day it is due to the fact that there’s new try guys content.

35. Can you say the alphabet backwards? ...no. but maybe i’ll learn to?

36. How do you like your coffee? past coffee and straight into espresso, and at that point, i take it only with the following dunkin’ syrups: thin mint, heath bar or red velvet. and then with a ton of almond milk. iced.

37. Favorite pair of shoes? either a pair of gray ankle boots I got two years ago or my black flower-patterned sneakers!

38. The time you normally go to sleep? 2-2:30ish? I’m trying.

39. The time you normally get up? 9, but whenever on the weekends.

40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? sunsets for the sole reason that I’ve been awake to see the sunrise only a handful of times, one of them voluntary.

41. How many blankets on your bed? three, although I have accidentally kicked one to the floor.

42. Describe your kitchen plates. they’re round and white with a floral pattern around the edges. it’s nice and pastel, and I’m pretty sure we’ve had these plates since before I was born. there are some newer ones, but they’re kind of the same.

43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage? anyone who knows me will know that i am an ABSOLUTE lightweight. i drink like a fresher, which is to say i drink mikes, Smirnoff ices, twisted teas, angry orchard and rekorderligs (rip rekorderligs, i haven’t had them since i got back from Europe and they’re fantastic). i also like pink moscato LOL.

44. Do you play cards? not in the way of poker or blackjack? I play the kids’ games, like 21 and Big 2.

45. What color is your car? silver

46. Can you change a tire? ooh, no...although I should probably try to learn...

47. Your favorite province? Tuscany province, because Florence is literally the only place I’ve been to that’s located within a province. other than Quebec, but I really liked Florence.

48. Favorite job you’ve ever had? i’ve had maybe 3 in my life and while being a temp was enriching, i worked at a dunks for a spell and kind of found a family there! so that was nice.

49. How did you get your biggest scar? went down a hill on a scooter, wiped out and almost got hit by a truck. it’s on my ankle.

50. What did you do today that made someone else happy? ha....nothing? although I hope my family appreciates that i did the dishes.

i tag: @swifteforeverandalways @crazyrichfilipinos @peacequack @coffee-esque and anyone else that wants to do it!

#re things #tag things #besidemethewholedamntime #re catches up on her tags

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sheliesshattered · 4 years

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Fic meme

I was tagged by @primarybufferpanel -- thank you darling, this was a ton of fun to do!

This got a bit long, so I’ll put the people I’m tagging here at the top: @claraaoswald, @ambitious-witch, @someillplanetreigns, and @junoinferno, if you feel like playing!

My AO3, my old non-updating fanfiction.net

Fandoms I’ve made fanworks for: Oh lord. I’m only going to count fanfiction that has actually been posted, but if I tried to count up every fandom that I’d started writing for and left unfinished fragments languishing on various harddrives and googledocs over the years, it’d be at least double this list. I have two pseuds on AO3, with the fics roughly organized by fandoms that I post about on this Tumblr account (sheliesshattered) and fandoms that pre-date my time on Tumblr that I don’t post about very much (glasscannon). Putting all the fandoms together in one alphabetized list:

Black Sails - 5 Doctor Who - 8 Firefly/Serenity - 1 Game of Thrones - 1 The Hobbit - 1 The Hunger Games - 1 Iron Man - 2 Law & Order: Criminal Intent - 1 Mad Max - 2 Once Upon A Time - 1 Poldark - 3 Star Wars - 3 Twilight - 7 The West Wing - 1

Number of fics: 38, including a big unfinished epic that I never moved over from ff.n, and don’t plan to unless I finish it someday.

Fics I spent more time on: I’m not even quite sure how to measure this. I’m a slow writer, and a single story can easily hold my attention for years at a time, or be something I return to when there isn’t a newer fandom temporarily consuming me. I don’t tend to keep track of how many hours I put into a fanfic, though. The unfinished epic I mentioned is probably near the top of that list, and was a huge part of my life from 2009 to 2013. Other contenders would be the All Hands series (written with PBP!), and Truth Universally Acknowledged, particularly if you include all the massive world-building that went into that one.

But really probably the one I’ve poured the most hours into, between research and writing, is a Doctor Who epic that hasn’t yet seen the light of day, called Home The Long Way ‘Round. Because I have such a habit of starting long stories and then not finishing them, I’m making myself get that one completely done before I post any of it to AO3, so I don’t have anything to show for it yet, but I’ve put a ton of time into it over the last five years or so. Hopefully someday I’ll actually get to share it. :)

Fics I spent less time on: Like I said, I’m a very slow writer, so any time I can turn out a story in a matter of days I’m just absolutely shocked. I wrote The Message over the course of about 24 hours, which is probably the fastest I’ve ever finished anything in my life ever, lol.

Longest fic: The All Hands series is sitting at 126,800 words, and PBP and I have more finished for it that we’re hoping to post soon-ish. The unfinished epic made it to almost 119,000 words before I ran out of steam. Truth Universally Acknowledged racked up about 54,000 words before my co-writer and I took a break from it, and probably triple that in world-building bibles and timelines, etc. On the works-in-progress side of things, Home The Long Way ‘Round is sitting at about 40,000 words currently and only about a third of the way done, and the For As Long As We Get series is at 21,000 words between what I’ve posted and what I’m still working on, and will definitely continue to grow.

Shortest story: 10 Seconds, at 208 words. Also one of the very first fanfics I ever finished and posted online.

Most hits: Truth Universally Acknowledged, by like a factor of 20 vs anything else I have on AO3. It’s the only time I’ve written for the main pairing in an active fandom (tho my purview in the co-writing was more on the secondary pairing), and that translated to a stupidly large number of hits. Fanfiction.net doesn’t count hits the same way, but the unfinished epic is sitting at about 3500 favs.

Most kudos: Setting The Stuns’ls, the first in the All Hands series -- which is SHOCKING considering that’s a tiny rowboat of a fandom, for a non-canon background pairing that has literally about 30 seconds of shared screentime, and the two romantic leads don’t so much as kiss over the course of 94,000 words (longing looks, significant hand-touches, mutual pining, definitely, but kissing, not so much).

Most bookmarks: Truth Universally Acknowledged, by a long shot.

Fic you want to rewrite or expand: I don’t tend to edit a story once it’s been posted, beyond correcting a typo or adding a missed word. Once it’s published, it’s finished and I don’t change it significantly. I do have quite a few (so, so many) unfinished stories that I would love to finish up at some point.

Total words combined: Counting only published fics, including the unfinished epic (and a companion piece for it) that lives only on ff.n, I’m currently at 376,542 words total.

Fav fic you wrote: How can you make me choose between my children like this, honestly?? Siiiigh. I’m with PBP, whatever I’m working on currently is usually my favorite. I’m having a ton of fun with For As Long As We Get, and can’t wait to publish the next part of that, hopefully sometime this month. I’m incredibly proud of All Hands, and that occupied such a specific time in my life that I’ll always think of it fondly. I’m exceptionally happy with the character voices and use of language in both Breathe Again and Upon This Rock Will I Break Myself, Until It Shows Me Your Beloved Face, and tend to feel like they don’t get enough love vs how much I love them. But my one true favorite is and will always be Home The Long Way ‘Round, and hopefully I’ll actually be able to finish it and post it someday.

Share a bit of your WIP or idea if you have anything planned: Again, how can I possibly choose just one?? Even just within the Doctor Who fandom, I currently have more than half a dozen stories actively in progress. But since I’ve talked it up so much without being able to link to it at all, and just declared it my all-time fav, I’m going to break one of my own rules and post the whole first chapter (eek!) of Home The Long Way ‘Round behind a read more:

Chapter 1: Orange Dreams

The sound of the wind is whispering in your head Can you feel it coming back? Through the warmth, through the cold, keep running ‘til we’re there. We're coming home now, we’re coming home now. —Home, Dotan

The winds shrieked and howled around her. Clara had never been in a tornado, but she imagined it would feel like this to stand in the eye of one. She could see gusts lifting the tops off the sand dunes in shimmering ribbons, gold against the orange sky. The waves of airborne sand dissipated a few feet from her, leaving only a jagged grittiness in the air.

A woman with long blonde hair was yelling at her, her words ripped away by the wind.

“Tell me again!” Clara called back to her. “Tell me how to find home!”

“It’s just physics!” the other woman shouted, taking a step closer; they were nearly the same height. “No information can ever be lost! Start from zero, and run the math! We’ll be waiting on the other end of that equation!”

There was something Clara desperately wanted to tell this woman who looked at her with kindness behind the steel of her eyes, but in that moment, the words wouldn’t come.

“Look!” someone yelled behind Clara, and though she didn’t want to take her eyes off her, she instinctively looked up, following the line of the other person’s arm up into the gathering storm-whipped dusk. There, silhouetted against the last of the light, was the unmistakable blue boxy shape of the Doctor’s TARDIS, spinning quickly as it flew away—

Clara jerked awake, her heart hammering against her ribs, already sitting up and pulling off her sleep mask before she realised what had woken her was the sound of the TARDIS materialising in the sitting room of her flat. She took a moment to catch her breath, trying to hold onto the details of the dream. In the other room, the TARDIS’s familiar wheezing and groaning came to a stop with a soft thud, followed by the squeak of the door.

“Doctor?” Clara called, not bothering to hide the sleep nor the annoyance in her voice.

He poked his head around her bedroom doorframe, grey hair awry and his most innocent expression plastered on — which meant he knew he was waking her and felt at least marginally bad about it. “Hello, Clara. It’s Wednesday,” he said pleasantly, by way of explanation.

“Is it?” she asked, deadpan.

“Technically.”

“You do know that I have to work today, don’t you?”

“Not for another six hours. So come on, up-and-at-‘em, plenty of time to go out and save the universe and still be back in time for your morning coffee. I’ve an adventure that simply won’t keep, so come on!”

His excitement was infectious, as he must have known it would be, but Clara clung to her annoyance a little longer, mostly for show. “You have a time machine: everything can keep,” she replied, but waved him off before he could launch into a lecture on all the ways that statement was false, at least from a temporal physics standpoint. He lectured anyway, hovering outside her bedroom door as she dressed, though Clara expected it was mostly to keep himself from pacing in anticipation. She followed more than half of it, and worried a bit over how often she let him babble on about the minutiae of time travel these days.

By the time the universe had been set to rights — or at least one small blue world, home to a race of sentient seahorses, that had been facing imminent extinction in the form of a rogue exoplanet — she had nearly forgotten her unsettling, vivid dream.

Given the recent events on Skaro, Clara was unsurprised when bits of her experiences there began to filter into her dreams. Truthfully, she had expected to dream of it more often than she did, but in the weeks that followed, more nights than not her sleeping mind instead conjured up the strange orange landscape. She revisited that screaming sandstorm so often it became almost comforting, and before long, other dreams joined it.

Clara was leaned against a railing on a high balcony, overlooking a large city coming alight as dusk crept on, a rusty sunset that stretched the width of the horizon bathing the world in amber. The woman with the serious eyes and long, straight blonde hair stood beside her, in the middle of a conversation, as happened so frequently in dreams.

“Alright, but what about the last stage?” Clara asked, elbows resting next to hers on the railing. “That bit depends on us actively doing something, and you know we can’t rely on my knowledge. I can’t take any of the engineering or navigation with me, so it’ll be down to him.”

“And he loves a good puzzle,” the other woman said confidently, flicking her hair over her shoulder with a twitch of her head. “He’ll want to find us. He’ll figure it out.”

“Before I die of old age? Are you sure? My mother was one of his professors at the Academy, I’ve seen his test scores. I think we need a fail-safe.”

“He did graduate,” she pointed out reasonably.

“He passed his exams with a fifty-one percent on his second attempt! No, we can’t assume he’ll have all the baseline information to even consider such a solution, much less actually accomplish the maths. We have to find some way to hide it with me,” Clara said. “Or in his TARDIS.”

The woman was silent for a long moment, her mouth set in a thoughtful line. On the distant horizon, the sun had finished its slow descent, but below them the city was coming to life, the light not so much fading as changing sources, becoming ever so slightly more golden.

“By that point in the timeline,” the blonde woman said, speaking slowly, still thinking it through, “you’ll have been exposed to his timestream and to the crack in the universe, so some of your memories will probably start leaking through. If we structure the extraction the right way, we might be able to embed a particular thought or moment into your consciousness before you go into the Schism.”

“What’d you have in mind?” Clara asked, turning her head to look at her.

“This conversation?” she suggested, laughing, her broad smile transforming her face. “No, a phrase would be cleaner, I think.”

“‘Run the math, you idiot boy’?” Clara suggested, also giggling.

“Oh yes, that’d go over well! No, if you want him to do something, call him clever. Works every time!” she laughed, leaning her shoulder into Clara’s.

“The horrid thing is that I know the temporal physics for this is part of my mother’s coursework,” Clara groaned. “If he hadn’t slept through so many of her classes, this would be a non-issue!”

“Ah, but a Doctor who was always responsible? What a boring universe that would be!”

Above them, the stars were beginning to come out, though the glare of the city obscured them. Through the haze of the dream, Clara couldn’t find any constellations she recognised. “You don’t have to tell me,” she said. “I was the one who helped him steal that box in the first place.”

“And if he could take half a moment to remember that,” the blonde woman said seriously, “he might realise the role of his TARDIS in all of this, and start to think of the solution that way.”

“‘Run the math, you—”

“Clever.”

“—boy, and remember when you met me’?”

The other woman nodded, considering. “That could do it. Your chronodeterminate conjugation won’t work until you come into contact with at least a little regeneration energy. Assuming you choose regeneration on Trenzalore, it might start kicking in then, in plenty of time for the last stage.”

“Run the math, you clever boy, and remember when you met me,” Clara whispered up to the distant stars, cradling her chin on her arms against the railing.

The woman mimicked her position, the golden light of the city and the silver light of the stars catching in her long pale hair. “It’s just physics,” she murmured back. “Start from zero and run the math. I’ll be waiting at the other end of that equation. We’ll all be waiting.”

As unsettling as they were, at least the orange-tinged dreams were better than nightmares of Daleks, of being locked in the Dalek casing, unable to convince the Doctor that it was her, it was her, she wasn’t a Dalek, she wasn’t a Dalek! Dreams of the Doctor peering at her down an eyestock, this face or the last, or any of the others buried deep in her subconscious, hearing her but not knowing her, seeing her but not saving her.

Clara grasped for that orange sky, let it carry her away in bronze sandstorms, golden cities slowly coming to life, and starlight caught in tawny hair.

Monday morning third period found her Year 10 students taking an essay exam while Clara doodled on a scrap piece of paper, trying to pull images and phrases out of the orange haze that had taken up residence in her slumbering hours since Skaro. There were bits that tugged at her memory, like a song she couldn’t quite place but whose tune was intensely familiar.

She’d written Run the math, you clever boy, and remember when you met me across the top of the page, and her eyes strayed to it every few seconds. The phrase had stayed with her after she woke, and had been on the tip of her tongue ever since, as though it was a message she was meant to deliver. Below it she’d rewritten the phrase, but crossed out six words: Run the math, you clever boy, and remember when you met me.

It was too close for comfort to the phrase that had, in retrospect, changed her life, sent her on her current course. The Maitlands’ mnemonic for their wifi password, which she’d said out loud during that first phone conversation with the Doctor, had caught his attention somehow, and it wasn’t until she jumped into his timestream that she understood. It was the last thing she’d said to him before sacrificing herself to save him. Every fragment of her scattered through his timestream had said it to him at some point as well, the words reverberating endlessly up and down his timeline.

Why her dreams would dredge it up now, and in such a strange context, Clara had no idea. They didn’t feel like random images, but more like memory-dreams, like the bits of echo lives that filtered through to her sleeping mind from time to time. It had to mean something.

Half way down the scrap paper she’d written: It’s just physics. Start from zero and run the math. Below this was the very helpful ??? and Clara idly traced over the question marks again. Physics was still a foreign language to her, despite how much the Doctor prattled on about it at times. She could bring this to him, she mused, but what was it, really? Her subconscious doing backflips in the wake of Skaro, that was all. No grand mystery to solve, no universe-altering secret code, just her. She wouldn’t bother the Doctor with this quite yet.

Besides, she was certain she could tease this apart on her own, follow the clues to their logical conclusion without his assistance. The dreams were insistent, and felt familiar, but Clara was sure she’d never dreamed of the blonde woman and the orange sky prior to Skaro. That was the next clue, then, and she jotted it down on her scrap paper. Something had changed after Skaro, something that caused her subconscious mind to dredge up these particular buried memories.

She needed more information. Dreams about her echo lives were always stronger when she was aboard the TARDIS travelling in the Vortex, sharper and easier to remember. Maybe these orange dreams would be, too. And maybe the TARDIS itself would have some answers for her.

Of course, she didn’t sleep aboard the TARDIS very often, with her insistence on returning home for a week of Real Life in between their Wednesday trips. But the Doctor was never adverse to her sticking around longer than she’d planned, and in the end it didn’t take much to convince him:

“I’ve a staff meeting at work that I’m dreading,” Clara told him on that next Wednesday, when they returned to the TARDIS after their latest outing. “So what do you say I have a little kip and then we squeeze in another adventure before you take me back to face my workday?”

She thought for a moment that the Doctor might question the change in their routine, but he seemed thrilled about the idea. When he announced that he had some tinkering with the engines he’d been putting off that should keep him occupied while she slept, Clara made an excuse to linger in the console room — “just going to finish reading this chapter, then off to bed” — until after he’d gone. Once he’d disappeared down the corridor and around a corner, she quietly set aside her book, then slipped out of her armchair and down the stairs towards the console. The rotors hummed overhead, and somehow Clara knew the TARDIS was aware of her, and was curious to see what she would do.

Carefully clearing her thoughts, she made her way over to the telepathic circuits, pushed up her sleeves, and slid her hands into the strange interface. Focus was the key, she knew, and she was nothing if not focused. She closed her eyes and held two very specific thoughts in her mind: the sand-whipped orange sky in her dreams, and the clear question, Where, please?

She hoped the please would help.

It was a long quiet moment with the circuits warmly cradling Clara’s fingers, and then something on the console beeped. Her eyes flew open and she carefully extracted her hands from the telepathic interface before pulling the monitor down to eye level.

Gallifrey the screen read in English, below an image of a startlingly red-orange planet. Immediately prior to the Time Lock.

Clara felt her heart thud painfully against her ribs as she read the brief text again. She’d been dreaming of Gallifrey? She knew she’d had an echo life on Gallifrey, but she remembered that interaction with the Doctor, and it happened indoors. She had never before dreamt of the Gallifreyan sky. Had it been buried somewhere in her subconscious with the rest of her memories of that life? Why surface now?

More confused than ever, she clicked the screen back to the desktop, unreadable Circular Gallifreyan floating idly across the display. Perhaps she should bring this up with the Doctor — it was his home world, after all. But the whole point of this had been to dream while they were in the Vortex, and if she didn’t get a move on, he’d be ready for their next adventure before she’d even managed to fall asleep. She could talk with him about it later.

And if things worked tonight as she hoped they would, maybe she would even have a bit more information to bring to him when she did.

“Fire suppressant in Pod Four!”

The frantic call was quickly overwhelmed by the sound of the requested suppressant dispensing from the ceiling. When it ended, the speaker, dressed in the dark red uniform of a technician, brushed soot and foam off his shirt.

“It hates me, that one,” he said, nodding at the unassuming gray cylinder in the open pod in front of him. It was devoid of features, even its doors invisible now in the wake of the fire, two meters tall and one meter in diameter, just like all the other patients in the workshop. But somehow it did seem to be glowering at him.

“And it always will, stop wasting your time,” his coworker said flippantly. He was perched in front of a console on the other side of the room, deep in his own repairs. “Just get the Impossible Girl to do it, she’ll have it eating out of her hand by lunchtime.”

Their conversation occurred in the time it took Clara to enter the large oblong workshop and make her way to the far end where the two were working. “I heard that,” she said seriously, earning a guilty-looking jump from the man who had spoken most recently. She continued over to Pod Four and leaned against the outer casing, arms folded over her uniformed chest, one booted ankle crossed over the other. “What did you do now?” she demanded of the first technician.

He looked at her with wide eyes, more out of genuine fear than mock innocence, in her estimation. “I just told it—”

“You what?” she snapped, in a tone she usually reserved for misbehaving students.

He wilted a little but started again “…I told it to—”

“Told it?”

“…to give me access to the logs,” he mumbled, dropping her gaze.

“Told it to give you access to the logs?” she asked, voice harsh. “Well first off, Number Four here prefers male pronouns, respecting that might put you on better footing. And secondly, as with all TARDISes, you’ll get a lot further if you ask rather than tell.”

Behind her, the other tech scoffed. “They’re machines, we shouldn’t have to baby them like that. An access request is an access request.”

Clara turned her head to pin him with an icy glare. “Some days I cannot believe I let you work here,” she told him bluntly. “They aren’t just machines, as you very well know. Yes, there’s hardware we need to be able to work with, but that’s nothing more than a radio, at some level — only instead of radio waves, we’re using oswin waves to talk to pan-dimensional beings so large, they can’t have a physical form in this dimension. Who, with a little extra energy, can take us and an infinite amount of folded space to nearly any point in spacetime. Just think about the massive intelligences that speak to us through each of those machines!

“But more to the point,” she said, turning back to the tech still covered in soot, “you have to understand their viewpoint of the universe, and their understanding of time. A Time Lord telling a TARDIS what to do is akin to creating a fixed point in spacetime. It’s in their nature to want to avoid fixed points. Ask instead, let him find his own way ‘round to it.”

Before the beleaguered technician could reply, there came a polite knocking from the far end of the room, and Clara turned to see a soldier standing in the doorway of the workshop, looking a little out of his depth. “Sorry to interrupt, but I have a message for—” he paused to glance down at the datapad in his hand, “for the Oswin. From the Lady President. Top priority.”

Clara was moving towards him before he’d finished speaking, curious and concerned, her attention focused on the message in his hands. But the dream faded out before she reached him, her mind moving on to something more abstract, more difficult to hold on to.

When she woke in her bed aboard the TARDIS, she stared at the ceiling with fond frustration. “If that was your attempt at help,” she whispered to the ship, “then I do not understand the message.”

It still wasn’t enough to bring to the Doctor, she decided later that day, watching him spin around the console room in the afterglow of a successful adventure, people saved, the universe bettered. So she was dreaming of Gallifrey, what of it? Many of the details in that last dream matched up with what she remembered of her interaction with the Doctor in that life. And while he occasionally enjoyed comparing memories of all the times her echoes had met him, she’d found he wasn’t especially keen on discussing the one in which she’d helped him steal the TARDIS and leave Gallifrey. Susan continued to be a point of pain for the Doctor, all these centuries later, and Clara understood him well enough to know better than to pick at that particular scab.

Still. That phrase was on a loop in her head: run the math, you clever boy, and remember when you met me. The emphasis on their meeting hadn’t been part of the original phrase, and now she was dreaming of the life in which they’d met face to face for the first time, from the Doctor’s perspective. Clearly they would have to discuss it at some point.

Eventually, but not yet.

#long post #about me #my writing #like seriously all of it #fanfiction #fandom life #AO3 #Home The Long Way 'Round #For As Long As We Get #All Hands #Truth Universally Acknowledged #et al #if you read that chapter let me know what you think!#❤️

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beckzorz · 6 years

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Out of Nowhere (2/21)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes/OFC Summary: An offhand comment at work draws Jesse Kaplan into the orbit of Bucky Barnes. Bucky’s excited at the prospect of normalcy, but there’s nothing normal about falling in love with the Winter Soldier. Words: 3577 A/N: HELLO FROM PART 2!!! Enter Bucky! :D And enter some unconventional formatting... A lot of this is drawn from my personal experiences, and a lot of my personal experiences involve texting my friends about what’s going on a hundred times a day XD (Sorry @kentuckybarnes!) The song for this chapter is “Solitude” by Duke Ellington from In a Sentimental Mood. Hope you enjoy :3

PART 2: “SOLITUDE”

Today, 6:38 PM

itsadrian: ahhh you look great!!!!! jesse.kaplan: Thanks :3333 jesse.kaplan: I’d feel better about this if I had a cocktail dress newer than the 1950s itsadrian: lol itsadrian: that’s what you get for only buying vintage clothes jesse.kaplan: My jeans are brand new Adrian… it’s my soul that’s the Real Old™ around here jesse.kaplan: don’t judge itsadrian: can’t help it itsadrian: at least it’s a nice one tho! the 50s are back in itsadrian: and black is classic itsadrian: i think if you went in a dress from the 40s you’d raise some Actual Old But Also Young™ eyebrows itsadrian: 50s seem pretty safe in comparison jesse.kaplan: don’t judge… but I had that same thought process haha itsadrian: SMART itsadrian: that’s why i keep you around :P jesse.kaplan: Well thank god otherwise I’d be having a panic attack on the metro which is never a great look jesse.kaplan: my roommate said it looked ok but I trust you more haha jesse.kaplan: oh geez here we go ttyl!! itsadrian: take a selfie with pepper potts!!!! byeeee

—

Jesse stuffed her phone in her clutch and adjusted its long strap across her body as she ran up the stairs to street level. The benefit was at a fancy hotel in Midtown, a block and a half from the subway. She was grateful she hadn’t given in to the urge to wear her fanciest shoes; her low black heels weren’t debilitating. Not yet, anyway. Hopefully there wouldn’t be too much standing in place.

She hummed jazz to herself as she walked briskly along, not meeting anyone’s gaze. Was it obvious where she was going, dressed up as she was? The benefit wasn’t hugely publicized, or at least she hoped it wasn’t. Sure, there might be a few supers there, but not the whole Avengers squad.

As soon as she rounded the corner, she sighed in relief. Though guests trickled in, the photographers corded off from the entry ignored them. No doubt they were waiting for the famous people.

Jesse hurried to the door, fished out the invite on her phone, and flashed it to the security guard as she went in. She heard sudden calls from the street, but the doors closed before she could see who was arriving.

Inside was cool, fancy—art deco carpeting, gilded columns, a gleaming reception desk. The odd tourist gawked; Jesse ignored them as best she could as she followed the directions of the smiling tuxedoed butler to the ballroom. She steeled herself and went inside.

Alright, so the room was gorgeous. A snazzy bar hugged the left wall, not far from the door, and a small raised stage complete with a Stark Foundation podium was on the far wall. Numbered tables set for ten took up much of the room, but there was a small area for schmoozing by the bar. Jesse brightened when she spotted the quartet just about to play—and a dance floor! Maybe they’d play some jazz, or swing…

Jesse deflated. She didn’t know anyone here.

“Excuse me,” someone said behind her, and Jesse apologized and made her way over to the bar, a vague smile fixed on her face. All she got was a water; no way was she drinking alcohol when she had to talk to strangers. She stood a few steps away from the bar, watching the few couples swaying to the music with a critical eye.

“Jesse?”

Jesse jumped and turned. A fellow dancer! Someone loved her tonight. “Mike! What are you doing here?”

“My company is getting a nod,” Mike said, grinning back down at her. He was pale and very tall—well over six feet—and wonderfully dressed, considering she’d only ever seen him in t-shirt and jeans. “You?”

“My colleague’s in the hospital, so I’m a last-minute replacement. She’ll recover,” Jesse added when Mike’s face screwed up. “If you’re here, I’m not sorry to have to replace her anymore though! How are you?”

“Pretty good, you?”

“Same old. Tired, but what else is new. Anyway, this isn’t exactly perfect music, but wanna dance?”

“Of course,” Mike answered.

Jesse chugged her water and left her empty cup and clutch at her table before hurrying back to Mike as a new song was starting. It had a better beat than the first song, and they snagged a spot near the band.

As soon as they starting pulsing to the music, Jesse’s lingering anxiety completely melted away. There was something magical about dancing with a good lead. Nothing else seemed to matter, and it was so easy to close your eyes and let yourself be led. And Mike was a very good lead.

Once they started doing more complex moves, where Mike was alternatively at arm’s length and swinging her around him, Jesse opened her eyes to avoid collisions. The song was good, predictable—they both hit a break in the music and grinned at each other.

Then Jesse recognized a face in the little crowd that was gathering around to watch them, and she couldn’t help but stare.

Sergeant Barnes.

His expression was severe, intense; his hair was pulled back tightly. Combined with a high forehead and his sharp suit, he looked two steps shy of terrifying. After a moment, he met her gaze. Jesse forced a smile and looked away, heat rising to her cheeks. She kept her eyes on Mike, only daring to look as far up as the onlookers’ collars when she wasn’t facing her friend.

The music was fun, her dancing was good, so why did the guy who had been so impressed by her work look so displeased with her now? Why couldn’t he smile like everyone else, and save her from being so worked up as to lose enjoyment in her one consolation tonight? She felt someone staring, cutting a line across her arms, her collarbone—she didn’t dare look to see if it was still him. She had to talk to him later.

The song finally ended, and Jesse thanked Mike with a customary hug. Some of the onlookers clapped, and Jesse warmed a little as she smiled shyly around at them. Barnes had vanished, thank god.

Jesse slipped away to get her cup, disturbed. She couldn’t think of Barnes like that; he’d done so much for BCEI. And Marilyn liked him. She took a breath to clear her head and arrived at her table.

Oh.

Well.

Sergeant Barnes was sitting next to her things. An old woman was chatting to him from his other side. Barnes glanced at her as she approached, but almost immediate turned his whole body to face her. His gaze was less severe than before; maybe the effect of his companion?

“Hello,” Jesse said, doing her best to maintain a genuine smile.

“Hey,” Barnes said. His voice was soft, a little melancholy, and not exactly friendly. Still, a big improvement.

Jesse slid into her seat and wrapped her hands nervously around her glass, which a waiter came by to refill. The tables were awfully crowded; there was no room to avoid Barnes' gaze without seeming rude. She took a steadying breath and looked back up at him as confidently as she could.

Okay, she knew he was ripped, but his face was oddly delicate. Maybe his sad eyes, or his mouth—Jesse cut herself off.

“I’m here for BCEI instead Marilyn,” she told him.

Barnes stiffened. His eyes narrowed as he leaned back a little to regard her with a suddenly terrifying demeanor. “Oh? What happened to Marilyn?”

“She broke her ankle,” Jesse blurted, her own eyes widening as his narrowed even further. “She’s alright though! Just a fall. A cat or… something. I’m sorry.”

“Bucky, contain yourself before you make this poor girl faint,” the old woman on Barnes' other side cut in. She leaned forward a bit and smiled, not unkindly, at Jesse. “You dance beautifully.”

“Oh, um, thanks,” Jesse said, cheeks hot. She stared into her water, trying to relax.

“I’m sorry,” Barnes said, low and repentant. “I was looking forward to seeing her.”

Jesse forced a little laugh. “It’s okay. I’m sorry too! She was looking forward to coming.”

“But you weren’t?” he asked. She looked up at that. He had his eyebrows raised a little, and she flushed anew. Was it so obvious?

“I only found out I was coming this morning,” she hedged. “I’ve never been to anything like this. I don’t think I’ll know if I should’ve looked forward to it until it’s over.”

He let out a rueful sigh. “Smart.”

Jesse sipped her water rather than agree with him. Far be it from her to tout her own intelligence. Though she couldn’t help but wonder what he was thinking of. He had to be thinking of something specific. She wondered.

The old woman on Barnes' other side reclaimed his attention with what turned out to be a long-winded story. Jesse couldn’t help but admire his quiet attentiveness. Perhaps listening to other people was easier than talking for him? She often found it so among strangers.

Five minutes in, the band quieted. The rest of their table filled in as Pepper Potts mounted the stage, a hulking man in a suit close at her heels. Jesse tried to figure out who in the crowd was a donor and who, like her, was a beneficiary. It was easier with the women—the rich ones had nicer, blingier jewelry. The men… all wore suits.

Potts began her speech, silencing all other conversations. “Hi and welcome to Stark Industries’ annual benefit…”

Jesse listened, half attentive, as Potts introduced various people representing various organizations. Each one went on stage to applause and shook Potts’ hand (continued applause), made a short speech about their Good Works (followed by applause), and left the stage. Jesse began to tune it all out, but then she heard Barnes' name and perked up.

“—Sergeant James Barnes, for his work with the Brooklyn Children’s Education Initiative.”

A smattering of applause echoed through the room as Barnes stood. The couple across the table from Jesse paled as they stared at him in fresh realization. Had they really not recognized him? Jesse glanced around; the shock and whispers were poorly masked by polite clapping. Apparently he wasn’t as instantly recognizable as she’d assumed.

A sudden burst of panic flared in her gut. Would Barnes' checkered history color BCEI’s opportunities in the future? Had she made a mistake soliciting his help?

She stared anxiously around the crowd, then back to Barnes. He stepped nimbly between the tables and up the steps to the podium, shook Pepper Potts’ hand, and adjusted the mic to his six-foot frame.

“Thanks,” Barnes said. His voice was soft, round, and vaguely ironic, but he met her eyes from across the room and gave her a serious little nod. Surprised, Jesse nodded back, and Barnes looked up to the prompter. “The Brooklyn Children’s Education Initiative provides the opportunity for underprivileged kids in my hometown to be fully engaged with their education. Their after-school programs at schools around Brooklyn welcome students of all backgrounds. I was lucky enough to participate in a program about the Great Depression, and it was inspiring to watch the students take control of their own learning. BCEI is a great cause. Thanks, Pepper, and everyone else who enables them to continue their good work.”

Once he stepped back, Jesse relaxed. It was so obviously scripted that she felt no qualms in only clapping as long as most others. It wasn’t any skin off his back if she didn’t give a standing ovation for her own organization.

Best of all, the speech completely sidestepped his questionable past.

When Barnes made it back to the table, Jesse smiled up at him briefly, finally at ease about her attendance. She was done! BCEI had done its part. As soon as the rest of the speeches were done, she could leave, dance with Mike, make small talk—

Well, hopefully not small talk.

As the next speech went underway, Jesse looked through the crowd for Mike, finally spotting him a few tables away next to a middle-aged blond woman. Mike was busy watching the speech, but the woman eventually glanced Jesse’s way. Jesse gave a little smile and looked back to the stage, embarrassed.

Pepper Potts finished her closing statements and left the stage (to applause) as the band picked back up. Jesse turned at last to Barnes and cleared her throat.

Once he turned to her, she said, “Thank you for your speech.”

“You’re welcome,” he said. He took a sip of his drink; Jesse realized he too was just drinking water, and wondered why. Habit, or necessity?

“I don’t know your name,” Barnes said suddenly.

“Oh, I’m sorry! I’m Jesse.”

He studied her face. “You apologize a lot,” he said. “Why?”

“I dunno, Jewish guilt?”

“Ha.” Barnes said, but he was not smiling.

Of course—he’d worked for Nazis. Jesse winced.

“Alternatively, bad parenting?” she offered.

Barnes gave a tiny smile—his first all night. Jesse almost cheered.

“Hi, Jesse.”

Jesse spun in her seat. “Mike! Hi!” She smiled up at her friend. Mike glanced at Barnes with muted curiosity.

“Wanna dance?” he asked.

She smiled and jumped to her feet. Let Barnes be awkward at someone else. “Take a guess.”

–

Jesse danced with Mike for a single glorious song. When a stranger asked her to dance, she accepted, but instantly regretted it. She smiled tensely the whole time, using as much force as she dared to keep her shoulder from popping out of its socket. Once the song was over, she fled back to Mike with a relieved sigh.

While they were dancing, someone kicked the back of Jesse’s ankle. She stumbled with a wince; Mike gripped her elbow, steadying her.

“I’m sorry! Are you okay?” she asked automatically, turning to face whoever had stepped on her.

It was Barnes, dancing with the old woman from their table. His face was pinched, but as she spoke his expression grew incredulous.

“I kicked you,” he said. “Are you okay?”

“Of course, it happens all the time,” Jesse said. She rolled her ankle, containing a wince. Barnes just stared at her. She smiled, hoping to diffuse—reassure him. “So I’ll have a bruise! It’s the cost of doing business. Not a big deal. You’re okay?”

“I’m fine,” he said, still looking at her as though she had two heads.

“Good,” Jesse said. She nodded with finality and turned back to Mike. As they finished out the song, she occasionally met Barnes' eyes. It was hard to look friendly under the force of his confusion, especially as she considered the necessity of asking after the well-being of someone who had not been hurt when that someone was a supersoldier.

Of course Barnes was fine. He was engineered to be fine.

Physically, anyway. Who knew what was going on in his head.

The song ended—Mike timed a dip perfectly—and Jesse hugged him and turned to get some water.

“Would you like to dance?”

Jesse blinked up at Barnes. He stood in her way, his gloved hand held out to her. She looked down at it, then back to him. Why was he asking? Out of politeness? He’d been more confounded by her than anything…

More importantly, did she actually want to dance with him? Would he hurt her? He didn’t seem to know how to express himself in public. Did that translate to dancing?

Well, the old woman had finished her dance with him in one piece, so she probably would too.

“Okay,” she said finally, and put her hand in his.

The corners of his mouth turned up, though she wouldn’t call it a smile exactly. He put his other arm—his flesh-and-bones arm—under hers and across her back, drawing her in so close that her nose brushed his jacket until she turned her head aside. She let out a shallow breath and tried to relax as the music started, simple and slow and gentle. His muscles shifted with his movements, and a sudden flush spread over her face as she realized how close they were. Jesse swallowed. Should she try to make conversation? Should she just bear the silence? What would they even talk about? They’d covered all the normal things back at the table…

“You dance real well,” Barnes said suddenly.

Jesse hummed her thanks and smiled despite herself. If someone who had lived through the actual swing era thought she was doing a good job even when she was so damn uncomfortable, she had to be good.

He moved them a little apart and studied her. “And you look… a little out of place.”

“What?!” Jesse laughed, too bewildered to be offended.

“Your dress is out of time. It’s, um…” Barnes frowned. His gloved hand clenched around hers, and her smile fell flat. Her heart twisted at his obvious confusion. God, no wonder he’d stared at her! He couldn’t place her. Captain America had missed everything for all the years he was missing, but the Winter Soldier… hadn’t.

Her face burned. How could she have been so self-centered? Every concern she’d had about Barnes had been all about her, not him. So what if he was awkward, or intimidating? Hadn’t he suffered enough? Hadn’t he earned the right to be free of her judgment?

“It’s from the fifties,” Jesse said at last, glancing at their clasped hands as his hold tightened again. He loosened his grip, chagrined.

“I thought so,” he said. “But—”

“My hair’s very much not fifties,” she added. “That might have thrown you off?”

Barnes tilted his head as he regarded her. She tried not to squirm, but being stared at by a man trying to piece her various incongruent parts together made her flesh crawl. It felt like an eternity before he was satisfied.

“Right,” he said. He let out a breath between his teeth and drew her back in, settling his arm securely around her. “Thank you.”

His mouth was by her ear, and the quiet warmth of his words sent a sudden shiver through her. Unable to speak, she just nodded.

How could such a strange, displaced man make her feel his presence with nothing more than a simple thank you? Dancing with him was so different from dancing with all the other leads she knew. With them, she had familiarity, comfort… There was comfort here too—he knew what he was doing, no question—but it was spiced with something dark. However awkward he was in conversation, they weren’t limited by that now. Behind that uncomfortable veneer, Barnes was dangerous. Somehow, that thrilled her.

Jesse sighed and closed her eyes, trying not to melt into Barnes’ solid hold. Her efforts must have been in vain, as he tightened his arm around her ever so slightly. She expected him to put her back to a safe distance, but… he didn’t.

Well, she’d take it. Whatever danger he posed to his enemies, right now he wasn’t hurting anyone.

The rest of the song passed in a pleasant blur. When it was over, Jesse hesitated before stepping back. Barnes had gone still, but he let her pull away without resistance.

“Thank you,” Jesse said. She smiled tentatively up at him.

Barnes didn’t answer; his eyes were dark and his shoulders tense. He stared down at her, unblinking. Jesse bit her lip, unable to look away. After a tense moment, he let out a quick breath, nodded sharply, and stalked away.

Jesse stood immobilized on the dance floor until Mike came by with his own water.

“You okay, Jesse?” he asked.

“I think so,” she said. She shook off the strange aftereffects of her dance with Barnes. “I think I’m going to head out. It was great seeing you! Will you be at the dance on Thursday?”

“I should be,” Mike said. He gave her a quick hug. “Bye.”

“See ya.”

Jesse made her way back to her table, still half in a daze as she gathered her clutch and wove her way back to the door. She was almost there when someone put a firm hand on her arm, stopping her in her tracks.

It was Barnes. His face was back to its normal solemnity, but Jesse flushed all the same at the sudden memory of being held against him.

“Where is Marilyn staying?” he asked.

“Oh, I don’t know. I’m sorry. I can find out,” she offered reflexively, then frowned. “Although I don’t know how to get in touch with you.”

“Give me your phone,” he said. “Unlocked.”

Jesse blinked and did as he asked. There was no arguing with that tone of voice. Barnes started a new text, and Jesse raised her eyebrows. “Aren’t you worried I’d give your number to someone else?”

He gave her a dry look, but paused. “Are you going to?”

“No…”

“So I’m not worried.” He sent the text and passed her phone back to her. “Thanks.”

“No problem.” Jesse tucked her phone away, bewildered. “You and Marilyn must have really hit it off.”

“She’s great. No nonsense, no judgment.”

Jesse bit the inside of her lip. “I suppose so.”

Barnes’ eyes narrowed at once. “What do you mean?”

“Oh—well, everyone’s judgmental. It’s just that Marilyn is usually right, so it’s not so obvious. Or annoying. At least for sensible folk. You know.”

Barnes smiled, his face transformed into something sweet and warm. Jesse couldn’t help but smile back.

#bucky barnes x ofc #bucky barnes fic #winter soldier x ofc #winter soldier fic #becca writes #the not for profit fic

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wutlaikalikes · 5 years

Text

Collection (room explanation)

I don’t think this will make it on the ranks but I kind of want to explain what’s going on this room. You can also think of this as an incomplete guide especially for new fans.

By the way, I know its fun to confuse newer fans but please don’t call them fake fans. They are new and we don’t want them to leave. I mean what’s the point of campaigning for others to subscribe to PewDiePie if we are gonna push them away? Please play nice.

Let’s start from the door way. ^_^

(warning: this is a blog so i have my stories in it)

Barrels

Quick story, my brother and I play coop games every now and then. Suddenly, he shouted “BARRELS!”. I was like “the F is wrong with you”. He explained that he got that from PewDiePie and that PewDiePie explained that barrels exists in almost every videogames. I bet there’s more to that but my brother didn’t explain any further. I don’t even know from what video is that. (Also I must confess, I completely forgot that there is a plain barrel on this game. My original entry have a red barrier instead.)

Cardboard Props of Tommy Wiseau, Ainsley Harriott and Danny DeVito, and the Doodle background

Around the time I started to watch PewDiePie’s content, it was in his new office and his background consisted of a blank white backdrop that later he have written on. If I remember correctly, the comment was the first comment of the year and later on it evolved into the doodle background. One by one, Danny DeVito, Ainsley Harriott and Tommy Wiseau’s cardboard cutouts were added.

During this time the background also consisted of Slippy’s tank and the neon Brofist sign.

Kaws figurine and Gary Baseman’s Toby doll

PewDiePie made a video of his secret collection that included these figurines.

Stephano

Quick story, this thing confused me the hell out of me. It looked so weird no matter you turn this. I just recently found what this was when I was browsing for Minecraft fanarts on deviantArt. This is a statue PewDiePie carried around during his play through of Amnesia.

Ruby Play Button

When PewDiePie reached 50 million subscribers, YouTube gave him a custom play button with its mini version that PewDiePie gave away to his oldest and active followers.

Pewdiepie Clutch Gaming Chair

The awesome chair that cost $399 that I can never afford. This famous chair made it to YouTube Rewind 2018 thanks to Jaiden Animations. In the game, this chair also cost 399 Bux but before this only cost 300 Bux. I remember this cause I was saving up Bux for this and when I was about to buy it the price changed! I’m looking at you Outerminds! lol

Maya, Slippy, and Edgar

These adorable pets need no introduction but for those who still doesn’t know these are Felix’s and Marzia’s pets. For newer fans, you may not know who Slippy was and that is because Slippy passed away in 2017, RIP. They also have a hedgehog named Dogy.

Revelmode

This is not just a logo that you would see when you open Tuber Simulator. This is PewDiePie’s MCN in collaboration with other YouTubers as part of Makers Studio.

Outerminds

The developer of the PewDiePie’s Tuber Simulator. I hope it’s okay for me to give my opinion but this is game is actually great and it’s available for free! (sorry I can’t help it)

Joergen, Boat Cow, Water Sheep and Sven

Do I need to explain who these are? These are PewDiePie’s pets and companions in his adventure on Minecraft series.

PewDiePie with a shopping cart

Based on probably the most meme’d photo of PewDiePie but is possibly fake cause he doesn’t have any legs lol.

I bet I missed other items that is inspired by PewDiePie. Honestly, I’m initially not a fan. I subscribed to PewDiePie after he reached 50 million subscribers and seriously watched his content when the controversy started. I wasn’t in it for the drama, I was curious as to why he have more than 50 million subscribers despite all the accusations. But after I found that all these claims were blown out of proportions, I continued to watch his videos cause his content makes me smile. I don’t care what others says at this point. I mean if it makes you happy and not really hurting anyone, why should others be concerned.

#pewdiepie #PewDiePie's Tuber Simulator #mobile game #blog

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missmonkeymode · 5 years

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My story with google + since its ending soon

So, first things first. How did I get on google plus in the first place? Honestly I'm not fully sure, I think it was a mix of youtube being glued onto google plus, my brother using it, and maybe being lonely I don't fully know. I remember the first thing I did, it was basically add a bunch of pokemon stuff to my feed and follow my brother. Nothing much really happened then, but the more important part is what happened a little bit later, like a couple of months after I made the account. I found a group of people who roleplayed warrior cats. I know, warrior cats. I was intrigued by the thought of roleplaying, since it was like a joint story (in my eyes at least). I immediately joined and made my first oc ever. Her name was Ivy, she's a young cat who hated everything and everyone and was weirdly strong. I made her design in a dolldevine thing. Funny thing though, I didn't even read one book about warrior cats before I joined the group.

That was technically the first time I had internet friends. I remember thinking that everyone was like, cool older teenagers but I found out recently that the closest friend I had was literally 2 years older than me so who would've thought. Eventually, the community got more and more inactive, and we just stopped. We stopped roleplaying with each other, and I think I was the only one who stuck with google plus from that group weirdly. This lasted until like, mid 2015 I wanna say? I dont't fully remember, but it doesn't fully matter, just by 2015 we split up.

So mid 2015 to early 2016 I literally remember nothing from them except liking minecraft youtubers (VAGUELY THO). All I do remember is getting kicked from this one group for breaking the rules once, but screw them right? I was messing around on youtube, and I found Jacksepticeyes playthrough of undertale in February of 2016. I fell in love with undertale. To be honest, I think that was one of the most intense hyper fixation I've ever had oopsie. I started following anything related to Undertale, including rp blogs since I knew what they were. Then I found someone who roleplayed Ink Sans.

Now about 7th grade me: I wasn't at the best place if I'm honest. I didn't have any friends, mostly what I did was read since I didn't have a phone at the time, I was extremely antisocial, and all I remember is like, the only time I had fun at school was watching the theatre kids dick around in theatre class even though I was too timid to actually say hi.

7th grade me was a different person than now me, even though I still have some traits from older me. But hey we ain't here to hear kit talk about how she thinks her life changed and junk we here about g+ baybee

So when I found this Ink Sans roleplayer, I checked out their blog since I was really into undertale aus and Ink Sans was new to me. I immediately followed after I saw their content. I was in awe, this person was a great rper, was everything 7th grade me wished to be (funny, confident, friendly, all that good jazz), and they liked undertale. I started commenting on their post, and we became friends. I remember becoming friends with them, and befriending their friends. I still know who they are to this day, and I still follow them even if we're not really friends anymore. Eventually the Ink Sans rper made a group where their friends hung out, and you can imagine how shocked and excited I was. Who'd like plain old Kit, all she does is read. But nevertheless, I dedicated the good chunk of 2016 in that group.

Overtime, I learned everyones name and stopped referring to them as their character. Ink Sans's mun's name was Uki, a Gaster Sans became Izzy, a Flowey became a Cy, etc etc. Everyone was older than me, I was the youngest in the group. I remember good things about that place, but one thing I don't remember is how horny e veryone was besides me. Lowkey I think because of skeleporn that they posted that I use to get fluseterd when thinking of sans f. So people were chilling on the server, then Uki got into homestuck. SHe got the others into homestuck, and I believe I was the last one to get into it (mostly because of my brother lol). So we all were posting about homestuck, and as a joke, Uki invited as many Eridan rpers to the server (since she had a crush on eridan lol) and eventually a dude named Myth joined. I'm a mutual to him on tumblr now so thats poppin. Myth is a good friend but he wasn't the quietest person. Eventually because of how rowdy it got, Uki's mom found out about the server and banned her from social media.

Everyone was devastated after that, especially her boyfriend Cy, and that launched the group into a weird limbo where we'd talk to each other and still be friends outside of the group, but not actually be active in the group. Officially it died in summer of 2016, but if I had to say when it died, I would say late winter after Uki left it died. 2016 came and went, and now its 2017 with a good chunk of friends still being into homestuck, so we decided to start roleplaying together as homestuck ocs. That's when things get weird and take a turn towards the sour.

So Izzy, the person who was gaster, started dating this papyrus roleplayer, who we called pap. Myth Introduced us to some more people and then yeah. OH WAIT I FORGOT TO MENTION LOGAN AND LGBT! So this group was the first time I figured out that the lgbt community existed, and Logan was a Pansexual gal who had a lot of drama irl but overall was pretty chill. BACK TO THE STORY!

So everyone had an oc, and everyone was at various places in their roleplaying life. Some people they were great at it, some people didn't start rping until the group started, some people were rusty at it but has some expirence (that twas me). Because of this group I opened up MSPaint and actually figured out how it worked and start using it. It was fun but some people were..... unsavory to be kind. What I'm going to say in the spoilers contains tw of being sexually gross and suicide.

Around spring Izzy and Pap's relationship started getting shakey, and Izzy wanted to break up with Pap. At the time I had no idea what happened, but apparently Pap threatened Izzy with suicide if she did break up with him. Izzy told Logan about it, and Logan told everyone to unfollow him. I didn't since I didn't know what was happening, but Pap was shunned from the group and I have no idea what they're doing today. It was a good thing to, his character were gross. Again, I didn't realize it at the time but like, his homestuck characters were fucking WILD. If I remember correctly (and i do) one of his characters tried to hump other characters and yeah that was bad. I made my character punch him and was bout to rip off his troll dick so yeah I did register that that was bad, but I didn't realize the gravity of it. Also another one of his characters kidnapped another character and had them as a sex slave maybe? yeah so good riddance to him.

Tl;DR Pap was gross and bad, so he's gone.

So like, late 2017, the rp group went inactive and some people I still know and talk to. A guy called Muff that joined later is still a good friend of mine. But that split up, and each person just stopped using google+ all together. All that really stayed was Myth, Izzy, and Muff. Logan had something happened with an ex and now deleted her account. I don't know what happened to her, all that she's safe. Cy just slowly moved to a new site, and we didn't stay in contact. 2018 rolled in, and I decided to be more out there and like, try to actually do things irl so that's where I changed from middle school Kit to Kit right now. I still used google+, I found some more friends whom are way better than some of the people who I interreacted with in 2017. Nothing eventful happened that year, but it was an amazing year nevertheless. Now early summer 2018 happened and i found jojo's bizarre adventure, and to my surprise some of my newer friends liked jojo! So we bonded over that, somehow passed them while reading/watching it, and life is going good. Then the announcement thhat google+ is ending happened.

Everyone, and when I say everyone I mean everyone, freaked out. A little bit about google+ culture is that you can literally become friends with everyone no matter follower count or post, it was a great place to make friends. Everyone was in a tizy about how they were going to keep their friends since nobody wanted to lose them. Another thing about google+ culture is how terrible the site is. To anyone here who's familiar with tumblr, imagine the tumblr staff but they dont fix bugs and don't care much about the site, and that's honestly the google+ staff. So everyone jokes about how the site is bad, there was a meme that was created to poke fun at the bugs (it was gold stars), and everyone said "when will this god forsaken site ended". Literally at first nobody knew if the announcement was real or not thats how much people joked about the end of google plus.

According to an article, the original end date was going to be in August. This was announced early this year, so people had time to plug other social media and things like that. But, that wasn't the fate of google+. Somehow someone leaked information about some users, so the google+ team decided to end it earlier. Tomorrow google plus won't be google plus, it'll be google business. Luckily I got peoples twitter and tumblr and all that jazz but.... damn. Who would've thought that google plus would end. None of us certainly did.

#google+#Google Plus #ill miss it

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villainship · 6 years

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[SWTOR asks/questions - R answers]

From @ghostace!

Extremely sorry if the text cut doesn’t work. lmao. I just answered All of it.

1. do you play mostly as male or female bodied characters? which body type do you use the most?

I go about equal on the gender options. I LIKE the body type 2 (aka. the societal beauty standard I’m accustomed to), but I try to mix it up. I don’t like what #1 does with the heads/faces but I do like female #4 faces.

2. which class has your favourite visual aesthetic?

Probably sniper, although double lightsabers are good too.

3. what advanced class has your favourite combat style for levelling, pve, and/or pvp?

Juggernaut/Guardian tanking is my top choice because it’s not complicated. Levelling sniper/gunslinger has been more fun.

4. are there any class combat styles you love, but can’t deal with on the mirrored version?

I still have so much to learn--I don’t have this issue yet.

5. what discipline can you just not play worth a damn?

I imagine the worst will prrroobably be trooper/BH heals. It seems like there’d be a lot going on, and I’m really unsuited to juggling different skills/unsuited for heals generally.

6. are there any disciplines you haven’t ever tried? which ones?

I’ve done tanking, DPS, and some healing, but there’s a lot of subtypes of the classes I’ve never tried.

7. what class has your favourite voice acting?

I haven’t finished much of the game! But uh. I really love the male warrior voice. Guilty obsession.

8. what single line is your favourite piece of dialogue in-game? where is it from?

So far: the exchange on Corellia where you can convince the droid to call up Baras -- just to troll him.

9. what single-planet class story arc is your favourite from all/any of the classes?

From my limited experience, Warrior’s story on Belsavis sticks with me.

10. which class story has the best story arc on a planet you normally hate?

I guess I hate Quesh but that was a good Warrior moment too.

11. which class story has the weakest story arc on a planet you normally love?

uhh I do love Ilum, but don’t feel too strongly about the short plot there (except I loved to look So Important in the cut scenes).

12. which shared (pub/imp) planetary arc can you never skip when levelling through the vanilla story?

8); I don’t tend to skip them yet.

13. are there any side/exploration/heroic missions you especially love?

Can’t think of one right now--but I love event missions. Gree & rakghouls!!

14. which character did you make as a throwaway (ie DvL) and came to love?

I haven’t really had that experience. Cezek is not meant to be particularly important, but I guess I might end up playing her more than I thought b/c sniping is fun.

15. which character did you think was going to stick around but these days is at the bottom of your login list?

No-. . . !!! I love all my children. . . !!

16. who was your original main? do you still play them?

Tarskal. 😒He’s still a main. Lol. Kirryl (pubside) is less-played than I might like her to be. She’s still my only max-level DPS, but DPS is not often sought-after.

17. if you have any older characters, what’s changed about them since you started?

It’s been less than 2 yrs since I started and I still haven’t finished with any of them-! so. . I wouldn’t call any of them ‘older characters’.

18. what companion headcanons/meta do you follow no matter what?

Several of them are MORE GAY than vanilla romance would have you believe.

19. which companion traits would you like to return to the writer’s room for reevaluation?

From what I’ve heard, I would like them to reconsider Doc’s behavior with “no means no”.

20. what five companions would you pick, from all of them, if you had to make a new crew?

Going with what I know: 1. Ashara 2. Vector 3. honestly maybe Qyzen 4. a Nexu 5. (this spots saved for a later favorite)

21. what in-game decision did you most dislike the given options for?

nggh. There’s gonna be some bad ones I bet.

22. do you collect cartel market items or stick to base-game? older items, newer items, a mix?

My character wardrobe is usually just stuff I picked up in the game. I am very into SH decos--cartel or otherwise.

23. which outfit did you spend the longest on? the most credits?

All are meticulously chosen. lol. I think the only pricy one was when I bought the Show-Off armor to have the open-chested vest for TD (cuz the Hooligan jacket with the belts was never in my price range). Getting skanky is the most costly style choice in this game. (And it was not outrageously pricey.)

24. what item(s) did you most regret buying on the gtn or cartel market?

Oh, I dunno that I have any big regrets yet. Maybe a few things I’m like “well THAT could have been cheaper if I waited”.

25. what collections category do you have the highest % completion in?

97% emoteeees

26. which stronghold did you spend the most time decorating? the most credits?

I unlocked most of Yavin, which was Expensive, but I have never properly decorated there. I might have spent approximately equal amounts of time on Coruscant and Dromund Kaas (a Lot for each). Nar Shaddaa is decorated-ish but maybe didn’t take so long.

27. which stronghold do you spend the most time in?

Nar Shaddaa on imperial (it’s got my best convenience setup), Coruscant on pub side.

28. do you host anything at your stronghold, or is it mostly for you?

I’m ready to have anybody over anytime!! I mean I also use it to conceptualize living situations for my OCs, but it’s awfully lonely if no one else ever visits.

29. what do you most like about the changes from beta, vanilla, early f2p, 4.0, etc?

I haven’t been here that long. :o I like how things turn more convenient though. 8); I DO remember a time before heroics were available in the activity window.

30. what do you miss the most about “the old days”? if a newer player, what have you heard about that you would have liked to experience?

Hmmm. It would have been cool to play before spoilers are just A Given about everything. And I don’t know if it was ever a thing, but I like to imagine a scenario where people actually do PVP in the rakghoul tunnels b/c that sounds like a glorious mess. Lol. Oh--AND I wouldn’t mind seeing what planets/world-bosses were like before everything got adjusted-for-level.

31. tell us a random fact/story you haven’t shared before about a swtor experience

Everybody loves to habitually touch/pick-up whatever items they can in this game, yea?

Well, when we were settling into being level 70, Dani and tried (and enjoyed) playing Uprisings with just the 2 of us and companions. (It can be easy for 2 people on Story mode, or they can present just a nice level of challenge--I learned a lot through those before I really started doing Flashpoints, actually).

We did good on Inferno! That was the first one. Big success.

We tried Destroyer of Worlds as our very next one, I think.

So like. . . the mobs weren’t causing many problems for us. It can get a lil crazy, but a tank (me) can keep things a bit organized, and Dani would AOE-/decimate/ those mobs as DPS. They are so weak. >:) ! We must have beat at least one boss encounter (possibly 2).

But as you go, there’s these ~mysterious~ stone tablets scattered all around the caverns, radiating a mystical energy.

U can click on them. Pick them up.

WHICH--as it turns out--(spoilers lmao) is the method of summoning the bonus boss Tentacle McAlien Horrorsquiggles.

Well no sense in letting the new visitor go unchallenged, now that it’s standing there waiting to say hi-- It--uh--turns out, though: the bonus boss was CONSIDERABLY more tough for us than the rest. We did our v best & gave it all we had (I def didn’t know everything I know now about playing my character, and gear was Worse), but we were hopelessly outmatched. \8) Got Wrekked a few times without any progress.

And then we realized we had to walk past the Monstrosity to get through the door. It did not despawn. So . . . Some more death resulted from that.

In the end, I THINK we made it past with Juli’s group-stealth. But the droid with our explosives did not progress far enough to trigger the end of the Uprising. (Either that, or that happened on a different run-through. . .) RIP & Reset. 8D;

We did finally complete the whole thing on the do-over (no problem~!!!) . . . But we’ve never gone back and had our rematch w/ that eldritch bonus boss.

#long post #ask meme #about me: R #raikari post

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