Just a Taste (William Agar & Caroline Lessing)
Summary: "There was always something whenever these meetings occurred - a tension too sharp. Inappropriate thoughts ran wildly and freely in Caroline’s mind at even hearing William’s determined voice. She wondered if it was ever the same for him."
Warnings: 18+ ONLY. Plot with references to mature subjects. Allusions to Dom!William, Sub!Caroline. Mild injuries. Implied masturbation. Allusions to jealousy. Allusions to (somewhat) jealous sex. Allusions to extramarital affair. Teasing. Implied Sub!William, Dom!Caroline. Blood kink.
Word Count: 1,347
Where To Read: Ao3 | Tumblr (you're here!)
A/N: My first ever pairing fic! This is an alternative ending to 'The Madman's Trial' scene in 'Quacks' where Caroline is cleaning up William's injuries. And although I feel bad for doing so, I just can't help but ship them (Sorry, Robert.) - Caroline is too good for Robert and William is too good for Mina! In an alternate universe (or hypothetical second series), William and Caroline are a couple and living their best lives! Anyway, I hope those who read this enjoy it. As always, if I have missed any Warnings, then please let me know. Any reblogs and/or comments are greatly appreciated!
Tag List: @jamiewintons | @pink-booty-butts
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Caroline sighed as the excess water from her cloth drained into the bowl. This had become part of her weekly routine at this point. Another blood-stained cloth from another incident was beginning to form against William’s blood-stained lips. Why, oh why did he insist on getting himself into these battles when the results were always the same?
She had to admire his willingness, though. He dared to try, and he was brave to do so, knowing the insane individuals he would meet up with could (and most likely, would) cause him harm. She just wished that they didn’t. Some small part of her wished he would give up - try something new. She was tired of this weekly occurrence, and her heart broke for him when William would look at her with defeated eyes once more - another attempt to cure the mad failed.
“I’m sorry,” William winced, the cut on his lip stinging from the cloth. As much as he tried to hide the thrill of, dare say, even speaking to Caroline, the guilt of her practically becoming his nurse carried deeply. “You should be with Robert, not cleaning up a failed alienist. But you are kind enough to do this, no matter the appearance I show you every week. Thank you, Caroline.”
Despite Caroline’s ashamed thoughts of wanting William to step away from this, even just for a day, she knew that isn’t what he needed to hear right now. He needed reassurance and she was more than happy to provide that - no matter the type or repercussions.
“William, as your friend, it is my duty to care. You are so brave and what you do is extraordinary. Besides, I like taking care of you.” Caroline’s eyes met William’s and locked for a second too long.
There was always something whenever these meetings occurred - a tension too sharp. Inappropriate thoughts ran wildly and freely in Caroline’s mind at even hearing William’s determined voice. She wondered if it was ever the same for him.
Have images such as her’s ever dared to preoccupy his mind? Has he ever touched himself? Touched himself to the thought of her? Did he ever imagine the words that would be spoken into her ear, as he would run his hands down her form? Too scandalous for words, would he care that she was taken by Robert? Or would that set jealousy within - causing him to want to prove how good he could make her feel; the pleasure he could bring by his praise and worship, and the most delicate yet precise touches to the most intimate part of her body?
William’s voice brought Caroline back to reality. “Are you okay?” He asked, concernedly, “You seem to be in deep thought, Caroline. I hope my injuries haven’t disgusted you.”
It was then that she was reminded of the fight he and Harold got into during the fake trial. How helpless the crowd was; how she was. How he was. The shouting and flailing around on the floor. The punches; the gasps. The bead of blood on William’s lip that was slowly appearing by the sheer force of Harold’s outburst…
“Caroline? Caroline, are you quite alright?”
“Yes!” Caroline cleared her throat and straightened up, the continuous bending down starting to ache her lower back. “Yes, William, I am fine. Your injuries haven’t disgusted me at all. Are you turning into a mad man too?”
William chuckled at Caroline’s joke. He appreciated the humour at this embarrassing and painful time, but he also noticed a slight sense of falseness. “You seem to be a little red. Are you feeling well? Would you like me to observe you? It is the last thing I can do, I can assure you.”
Caroline went back to the bowl to soak the cloth once more. “I was just thinking back to the trial. The pure lunacy of the man! You looked so…” She tried to contain herself and her thoughts. She didn’t want to skip too far ahead to what was a frightful time for William, but God, a gorgeous mess for her. “...helpless. When Harold pushed you onto the floor and hit you. The blood…”
“Yes, it wasn’t the best sight, was it? How embarrassing of me to think I could help.”
Caroline finally squeezed the excess water back into the bowl once more, but this time, placed the cloth onto the table. She faced William and walked back to him. While attending to him, Caroline was careful not to clean up everything so quickly. She bent down again and slowly traced her finger across William’s blooded lip.
“Caroline, what are you-”
She tilted William’s chip up with her other hand, making sure his eyes were only fixated on her. On her mesmerised face. On her finger with his blood.
William’s knuckles turned white by the act. He shifted but didn’t dare to look down, as though to dismiss the shiver he felt by this new intimidating position he found himself in. A gulp came next because should he speak, he was scared of the outcome. The thought of the noise he would make sent him deeper into his perplexed yet newly founded submissive state.
“Mm, yes.” Caroline turned her attention to her blooded finger, while still holding William’s chin with her other hand. “What is it I called you earlier, William?” She circled her finger with her thumb, spreading the fluid. “Helpless?”
Caroline faced William again, the most stunned expression greeting her. She finally dropped the hand at his chin and William breathed out deeply.
What just happened? What was Caroline up to? He was stunned. He tried to compose himself. William remembered his blood was still on Caroline. His face shot up, not knowing where to begin.
“You-”
“Poor thing.” William gulped. “Oh, don’t be so nervous, William. I’m not going to hurt you.” Caroline bent down once more, but this time, made sure to get as close to William’s ear without raising suspicion to the public.
“I have a blood kink,” She breathed into his ear.
Those words sent William insane. He tried to say something, anything, but he found his throat closed up and dry; the air nearly knocked out of him by Caroline’s statement.
Caroline returned to her standing position. With only the face that could only be described as enchanted, adorned by William, she decided to take it one step further. With hesitation, she looked around, almost as if to see if the coast was clear. She locked onto William’s eyes once more and slowly put her blooded finger into her mouth. William was in a daze; hypnotised, even, by Caroline’s action. Every movement she made with her finger until his blood was on her dominant tongue was tracked by his eyes.
William was out of it. He thought this was a dream. He thought he would wake up and have to take care of things. But what Caroline did next proved to be the opposite.
With one finger now licked clean of William’s blood, there was only her thumb to go. This new found confidence Caroline had was now desperate to be shown. With less hesitation this time, she quickly glanced around, and returned her gaze to William.
Quickly and quietly, she placed her thumb onto William’s lower lip. “Open up,” She whispered. Without even realising what was happening or what he was doing, William opened his mouth and felt Caroline’s thumb in his mouth. His blood in his mouth. Caroline’s thumb, with his blood, in his mouth. He ought to find it disgusting. But he was entranced. This feeling was foreign, yet he loved it. He couldn’t help but emit a strangled whine from his throat; he prayed Caroline didn’t hear.
After she was sure the rest of William’s blood was gone, Caroline slowly removed her thumb from William’s mouth. “There we go. Thank you for being so good while I cleaned you up, William. I’ll see you tomorrow, yes? Try not to get into too many fights before then. Otherwise I may just have to clean you up again.”
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Get It Together (Part 5)
When we last left off, Isaac was crying because of the purest thing he’s ever seen, Max is confused.
“S’up guys!”
“Hey Johnny, we were just uh.... Passing by. Thought we could make up for yesterday.” Stephen said quickly. “We were gonna grab Max next, but he’s here so, we were wondering if you guys wanted to hang in the park.”
“Sure, you in Maxamillion?” Johnny said, stepping off the porch.
“Sounds good to me, I wanted to try some flips on that one wall anyways.” Max replied.
“You want me to text yer pops Mux?” Johnny asked, waving his phone at Max.
“Nah, it’ll be fine, he’s not expecting me home until later anyways.”
“Alright lovebirds, let’s go.” Izzy said, starting to walk.
“What did you just say ?”
“Uhh, she said let’s go. You good Max?” Isaac asked.
“Right as rain, weatherboy.” Max replied, eye narrowed.
“I will scream.”
“I will not.”
As it turns out, the park has a wall that is extremely high. This made two people feel two very different things. Max, was extremely happy, and Johnny was extremely anxious.
“Nerd bones’re fragile Mux!”
“It’s not that high!”
“Ya said that ‘bout the bridge.”
“This is nothing like the bridge!”
“What happened at the bridge?” Ed asked.
“Y’know when max broke his other arm?” Johnny asked, turning to the rest of his friends.
“Johnny-” Max was interrupted.
“He was doin’ flips on the’edge of that low bridge, the one over the creek thas all dried up?”
“Max, you said you fell down the stairs!” Izzy scowled.
“Because I knew this would happen if you actually knew!”
“Max, c’mon!” Isaac said.
“You’re bein’ a little reckless little buddy.” Ollie told him.
“It’s not that big of a deal, I’m not made of glass!” Max growled, adjusting his hat.
“Yer not made’a steel either, Max.” Johnny looked Max in the eye before breaking eye contact and shuffling his feet. “Just don’t wantcha ta get hurt again. Ya scared me, nerd.” Max blinked.
“I guess it would suck to be stuck in a cast again.” He shrugged.
“Glad y’see it my way nerd.” Johnny grinned. “Now, who wantsa toss someone- prob’ly Storm Boy- inta the duck pond?”
“Please no.” Isaac groaned.
“I hate you.” Isaac told them, wringing out the hem of his shirt, and sending Johnny and Max flying into the duck pond with a wave of his hand. The two landed with a splash, and sat up quickly, laughing while the ducks flapped away for the second time, quacking indignantly.
“Will you guys knock it off? It’s September!” Izzy shouted from the playground.
“You’re gonna get hypothermia.” Ollie agreed.
“Oh man, my backpack’s soaked.”Max complained, using Johnny to balance and climb out of the pond. “Race you guys to the top of the jungle jim?”
“You’re on.”
“I’ve said this twice now, but Please No.” Isaac groaned for the second time, running to catch up with the pair already sprinting toward the playground area.
“What Isaac, just because you’re a freshmen you can’t hang out on the jungle jim?” Max called over his shoulder while pulling himself toward the top of the jungle jim while Johnny struggled to keep on the bottom rung with how slippery his feet were being.
Ollie and Izzy joined them, Ollie taking a few upward steps to reach the top, and Izzy jumping. Max turned to see Ed using his paintbrush to make a ladder to the top.
“That’s cheating- I don’t know what you’re doing but I don’t like it specs!” Stephen shouted as he and RJ neared the top where max and Ollie were sitting.
“Hey Johnny, guess I gave you the slip!” Max shouted.
“I’ll fight ya as soon as I get up there, nerd”
“I’m not sure I’ll be up for a fight in fifty years.”
“Girls girls, you’re both pretty.” Isabel yawned.
“Johnny, you’re literally being possessed by a fire spirit.” Isaac interrupted. “Just dry off, I used some wind.”
“Nope, no fair, I’m the only non-medium that’s soaked, and magnets can’t really dry things off.” Max said.
“Deal with it nerd,” Johnny taunted, and allowed himself to heat up. His hair didn’t catch on fire at all this time.
“I’ll have you know it’s cold up here.”
“Not really,” Ed said while Johnny clambered up the side of the jungle jim.
“It is if you’re soaked in pond water.”
“Take m’jacket then ya nerd.” Johnny shrugged, finally reaching the top. “It’s dry.”
Isaac pulled out his phone and pretended to check a text, but really obviously opened up his camera.
“I- uh you don’t have t-to, I mean-”
“Just take it nerdlord.”
“‘O-okay.”
Max was wearing Johnny’s jacket. No big deal. They were friends. Friends did that. Max opted to pretend that the reason his face was heating up was because he sprinted to the jungle jim. Nothing to do with Johnny Jhonny or his dumb face.
While Max was having his internal crisis, Johnny was refusing to acknowledge the fact that his jacket was way to big on Max and hung off on shoulder and the sleeves were too long and the only reason his face is as red as his hair is because he was using his powers. Nothing to do with Maxwell Puckett or his stupid face.
“Okay, while we ignore this moment that’s obviously happening, has anyone done Spender’s homework?” Izzy said, “Because I swear he puts at least three trick questions into every assignment.”
“Dude, the answers are always A, B, B, A, and then, F, A, B.” Stephen replied.
“Wait seriously?”
“Yeah, I figured it out in sixth grade.”
“More proof that Spender is a total dork.” Isaac snorted.
“You had an ABBA poster in your locker, Isaac.”
“Ed, every ABBA song is pure gold and you know it.”
“/Debatable/” RJ signed.
“Are you asking to be spraybottled because I can and will-”
“/King Kong Song./” RJ signed before Isaac could finish.
“Shut up it’s one song.”
“You did say every song-” Ollie began, but was interrupted by a shriek that Johnny would deny for years to come despite Isaac’s still filming phone. Which may have been the cause of said shriek.
“Are- Are ya filmin ’- RJ my face ain’t red I-”
“Okay what is going on -”
“Just capturing a friendly moment on camera.” Isaac replied, not at all smug.
“I am going to die right now.”
“For what reason my dear friend?” Ed asked him.
“D-d-delete that’ya weirdo!” Johnny shouted, also ignoring how Max shrunk into his jacket.
“Okay, look see, deleted.” Isaac assured him showing Johnny his phone.
“Y-YOU JUST SENT IT T’THE GROUP CHAT.”
“Oops.”
“Well, it’s been fun, but I need to get my homework done!” Izzy dropped to the ground from the jungle jim. “Ed, we gotta split!”
“See ya!” Ed said before joining Isabel on the ground.
“Shoot what time is it?” Max asked.
“Uhh two, why?”
“Late for laundry day, gotta go- see ya guys!” Max shouted, doing a flip from one of the rungs on the jungle jim and grabbing his backpack before sprinting off.
“Show off!” Isaac yelled, before climbing down like a normal person. “I gotta head out too. Bye!”
“Doesn’t Max still have-”
“Don’t ruin it Stephen, let him realize on his own.” Ollie shushed Stephen.
“/Gotta dash losers. Johnny, wake up and ask him out already./” RJ signed, hopping down and sighing audibly as Johnny spluttered for a good five minutes.
“We gotta head too, I’m still on probation with my dads and Ollie’s gotta walk me everywhere because they trust ‘im.” Stephen said, climbing down.
“Bye Johnny!”
“See ya fellas.”
Which left Johnny sitting alone, questioning his own existence, and allowing himself to cool off before he melted the jungle jim.
“Wait a sec’...” Johnny scratched his head. He was forgetting something- “PUCKETT’S STILL GOT MY JACKET.”
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It is the weekend RJ Hamster
It is the weekend RJ Hamster
If you can’t see this e-mail properly,Click here to view it online
Date: Friday, 10/15/2021
Forward this e-mail to a friend
IT’S THE WEEKEND, PETER
Whether this week was a challenge or a breeze – You made it! Congratulations! To help you celebrate, here is your Friday afternoon weekly overview.
~SanTanValley.com
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NEWS WE PUBLISHED THIS PAST
WEEK
QUICK QUACK TAKES THE HAUNT…
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nightmare realm: HUH WHAT THE FUCK--
[two rocketjumpers, one bonecrusher. let's see what happens.]
BC: hey again. how's it going?
RJ: it's going well? i think.
BC: you think? why'zat?
RJ: well... uhm.
[A certain murderlady passes by, appearing from behind rocketjumper.]
A!RJ: Hello there.
BC: YOU.
N!RJ: yeahhhh... i might've manifested a lady.
A!RJ: So I'm one of your nightmares now, huh? Pretty sick. Hey, I just wanted to ask you something, Bonecrusher.
BC: ...what?
[A!Rocketjumper attempts to shank bonecrusher.]
[Her blade doesn't do anything, instead harmlessly passing through him.]
A!RJ: I see.
N!RJ: ...primus, this is traumatic to watch.
A!RJ: So, you're his wife, huh? What's it like being married to a runt?
N!RJ: at least he's better than all of my exes. one of them tried to fucking murder me and accused me of attempted suicide! TO THE DJD!
A!RJ: That seems like a you problem, girlie.
N!RJ: YOU. ARE. ME. IT IS OUR PROBLEM.
A!RJ: Good point, I suppose. So, who was that?
N!RJ: i think that was one of the,,, insecticon drones? i can't remember.
A!RJ: Hmm. Hey, where'd Bonecrusher go?
N!RJ: no clue... BONECRUSHER?!
[a bonecrusher appears from N!rocketjumper's cleavage. where the hell else would he be?]
BC: [quack]
N!RJ: [snort]
A!RJ: [W H E E Z E]
BC: hello, wife and ex-wife. i was busy being awake, my apologies.
N!RJ: OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU-
A!RJ: [slightly less aggressive wheeze] You know what? I can see wh- [wheeze] why you married him now! [soft wheeze]
N!RJ: [GIGGLING BEYOND PRONUNCIATION] H- H- [wheeze] DUDE I HAVE A PUN-
A!RJ: S... [giggle] shoot.
N!RJ: HUSBAND TRANSPORTATION SYSTEMMMM
A!RJ: [soundless wheeze]
[and then they reconciled with the Murderlady and socialized for 7 more hours, or until footmuncher wakes bonecrusher up. whichever comes first.]
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Quack...Quack...aquele patinho feio mas gostoso.. . (em Goytacazes -RJ) https://www.instagram.com/p/B0eyJ3HpKE7sU9-qblAZwUneMJDjM6FhgkDRyc0/?igshid=wdo1xyphmc63
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TWWS: The Best of D&D
Ladiiiiiiiies and gentlemeeeeeeeeeeen! Welcome to the ultimate showdown: THE BEST OF D&D!
This post contains the best of the best of the D&D/RPG posts over the years of TWWS, all the way from the beginning. At the end of the post, there will be a link to a survey where you can vote for your favourites in each category (other/3.5e, 4e, and 5e) and nominate MVPs for each category. If the person you want to vote MVP has only been referenced as “Player,” just note down what quote they’re responsible for. A week from today (or until enough of you fill out the survey), Round 2 of the competition begins.
Everybody roll for initiative!
Overheard During Other RPGs
During Hackmaster, about a bottle label:
SB: “It says ‘Thou shalt not question the DM over inane shit!’”
Overheard During D&D 3.5e
Unarmed damage?:
MM: “It’s the difference between a slap and a bitch-slap.”
So wrong it's right:
MM (IC): “I like your spunk.”
KH (OOC): “So does [gay player].”
Rogue equipment:
KB (IC): “I need [boots] that are…soft-sounding.”
MM (IC): “We have socks.”
Describing a character:
SO: “She is built like a brick shithouse.”
DM: “She shits brick houses.”
Bubbles: “She makes brick houses shit bricks.”
When the party has two rogues:
KH (IC): “I can find it!”
KB (IC): “I can find it better.”
RD (IC): “[Wizard], if you do not stop right now, I will arrest you for terminal stupidity, and I can assure you, I will find a law against it!”
A discount on services rendered:
SO: “What’s 75% off of ‘I run and do whatever you ask without question’?”
Calling for divine help in very specific situations:
MM: “Please state your current medical emergency.”
KB: “Head-splosion.”
SO: “If you have been stabbed, press one. If you are currently being stabbed, press two.”
MM: “If your head’s detonated and you’ve launched into a wall, press three.”
RD: “Why did you press three? We never expected anyone to press three!”
SO: “We don’t know what to do in this medical emergency! Please dial again!”
IO: “[Wizard] is going to say - ”
KB: “Can I tell you why this is a bad idea?”
IO: “No.”
Proper procedure when everything goes to hell:
RD: “[Cleric] goes outside and makes a magic circle, sits in it, and cries.”
KH (IC): “That stupid fucking son of a flea-ridden bitch cunt wizard - ”
MM (IC): “Oh, him.”
How to pray to the god Ao:
KB, KH, and MM: “I throw my hands up in the air sometimes sayin’ heeeeey-oh! I worship Aaaaaaa-o!”
Bubbles: “[The wizard’s] gaaaaaaaay-o!"
Overheard During D&D 4e
SIDE NOTE: A Quiplash commentary on D&D 4e:
A more environment-friendly alternative to toilet paper
- 4th ed character sheets
What we think we saw - again?:
Player: “If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and weighs the same as a duck, it must be a witch.”
KH: “It’s a witch.”
RJ: “Build a bridge out of 'er!”
Healing needed:
Player: “I have a mess kit, will that help?”
WS: “Only if you want to make a mess.”
Captain: “Neverwinter ho!”
Dwarf: “Hos? Where?”
SB: “Eventually you end up at the most popular stall in the market.”
Player: “Porn?”
About attacking a character that may or may not be good:
SB: “Wait, what’s your alignment?”
Player: “Lawful Paranoid.”
Taunting the kraken:
Player: “Your tentacles are so short even an anime girl wouldn’t take 'em!”
Questioning the legitimacy of an NPC:
SB (IC as Priest): “I have a degree in polytheism from the University of Phoenix Online!”
Making sure it’s really dead:
SB: "You kick the head and it goes sailing through the open door of the tomb. You hear a voice in the darkness go ’Gooooooooal!’”
Killing the undead:
SB: “Congratulations, you choked something to death that doesn’t breathe.”
Mass undead murder:
Player: “We made a ghoul-ash. An evil gumbo, really.”
Architecture:
Player: “I like big buttresses and I cannot lie.”
Interesting kills:
SB: “You decapitated him with a bludgeoning weapon.”
About flying books:
Player 1: “The window opens in! How do they fly out?”
Player 2: “They’re paperbacks."
Player: “Thank God I decided to engage the dragon in melee.”
MW: “You’ll never hear that in any other D&D campaign ever again.”
Player: “Is the food still on the table?”
Three Of Us: “DON’T EAT IT!!!”
Overheard During D&D 5e
Annoying Teen: (about his character) “Would he still hate me?”
AD: (not about his character) “I think everyone hates you.”
Don’t mess with a dire bear:
JI: “There’s one inside who attacks the bear…" (rolls) "...and misses horribly ‘cause he shits his pants.”
JI: “He doesn’t have 100 hit points. He has 95.”
Demonic insight:
KH: “I say in Infernal, ‘Peace! We mean you no harm!’”
JI: “There’s no word in Infernal for ‘peace.’”
Retroactive Edit: Demons actually speak Abyssal. Devils speak Infernal.
Animal form disadvantages:
AD: “I’m going to bite [the zombie].”
Everyone Else: (mass noise of disgust)
JI: “You feel a pinch in your mind as if she’s flipping through your yellow pages.”
AD: “That’s got to be a euphemism for something.”
ST: “Oh, yeah, baby, turn my yellow pages.”
JB: “Turn to ‘F’ for fun.”
What happens in every religious venue in every D&D campaign ever:
JB: “Here is the church, here is the steeple,”
KH: “Open the door, and here are the zombies.”
KH: “Did you sneak off to her house in the middle of the night?”
ST: “Does that sound like something I would do?”
KH, AD, and CD: “Yes.”
JI: “You guys came in here - ”
AD: “ - like a wrecking ball - ”
Post-adventure considerations:
KH: “[Rogue] wouldn’t know what to do with her life.”
AD: “She can bail herself out of jail.”
Switching to melee for a change:
CD: “Let’s see if this ‘offense’ thing you do all the time really works.” (rolls a critical hit)
The logistics of being swallowed by a sea monster:
ST: “Am I going to take damage if I move further along his digestive tract?”
EC: “If you had leprosy and your ears fell off would you be a deaf leper?”
Identifying mysterious cults:
KH: “What’s the Cult of Howling Hatred?”
EC: “The Westboro Baptist Church, obviously.”
DR: “Apparently your god has personally intervened due to your badassery.”
A Mass Effect cameo on a dexterity check for dancing:
EC: “If you roll a one, you dance like Shepard.”
EC (IC): “So what you’re saying is that it’s very dangerous and we shouldn’t go in. I’ll take point.”
Things to worry about in combat:
KH: “You don’t have enough hit points to take it like a man, honey.”
The ends justify the means?:
Bubbles: “Did you have fun role-playing an interrogation?”
DR: “You guys are fucked up.”
KH: “How do you stun-lock a Terrasque?!?”
JB: “Fourth Edition.”
ST: “Do we have to kill them before we eat? I hate murdering on an empty stomach.”
About a revenant and a possible lover:
EC: “Well the beast is committing necrophilia and the necro is committing bestiality…”
DR: “What happens in Faerun, et cetera.”
Rolling high on a seduction check:
DR: “Frankly, I didn’t think you’d go down this road.”
KH: “Oh, I went down all right.”
More on the seduction roll:
Bubbles: “Try to convince her to come with us. The way she came with you last night.”
About a nonviolent kua-toa:
Player: “He’s a paci-fish.”
About dealing with face-hugging enemies:
CD: “You swung at yourself and missed?”
AD: “I swung at myself and missed.”
ST (IC): “I’ll be staying in the boat unless you have need of my specific skills.”
CD (OOC): “Dying first is not a skill.”
About cultists:
DM (IC): “They are water people. Maybe they’re just going with the flow.”
About a minotaur who keeps missing:
DM: “At least when you put a bull in a china shop he’ll break shit.”
About bottles of brandy:
EC: “I have two questions: how many of them are there and how many of them can I carry?”
Ideas so bad they’re good:
KH: “We’re gonna blow up the temple with the distillery.”
F: “The temple, the lich, half the plot…”
About going forward:
KH: “Against our better judgment.”
DM: “What better judgment?”
KH: “Good point.”
About shooting arrows:
KH: “'Nock’ yourself out.”
About using a lot of magic:
JS: “We’re blowing a big load here right now.”
JS: “You wanna go up the shaft?”
ST and T: “That’s what he said.”
About flirting with an efreet:
JI: “Below her waist is a trailing cloud of black smoke, so you’re not getting anything.”
Questioning the guardian imp:
Player (IC): “What happens if someone disturbs the sarcophagus before your time is up?”
WS (IC): “There’ll be six more weeks of winter.”
MR (IC): “Trying to undercut me on my quest to restore my former glory?”
KH (IC): “You have no glory to restore.”
Other Players: “Oooooooh!”
SW: “Quick, someone cast heal!”
When talking with a spirit:
MR (IC): “You can’t just ask someone if they’re dead! That’s incredibly rude! The correct term is ‘mortally challenged’!”
After a petrifying encounter with some basilisks:
BC: “I always thought she was stone-hearted.”
KT: “I dunno, I thought she rocked.”
JS: “I am going to kill all of you.”
What to do with windmills:
KH: “If we had a lance, we could go tilting.”
MR: “Cavalier idea.”
Quest priorities:
Player 1: “No one’s going to pay us to do it right now. It’s not worth the attention.”
JF: “Roll to see if you hit me by accident.”
KH: “Oh, I’d hit you on purpose.”
K’s paladin chastising A’s paladin about her sex habits:
A (IC): “I thought you were the paladin of joy!”
K (IC): “Not that kind of joy!”
About a previous edition of D&D:
KH: “[What] the hell couldn’t you do in 3.5?”
SW: “Win.”
KH: “Technically you’re underage.”
ST: “That’s never stopped me before.”
AD: “You or your character?”
ST: “Do I have to answer that?”
D: “We’re gonna make the Underdark great again!”
ST: “We’re gonna build a wall - a really big wall in the Underdark, and we’re gonna make the gnomes pay for it.”
A: “We pay for everything already! Screw you!”
About a character who caught fire:
T: “He’s not rolling initiative; he’s rolling on the ground.”
T (IC): “Let’s go before the men’s egos get us killed.”
JB (IC): “My god believes in good opportunities. Not dying is a good opportunity.”
Passing on some bad news:
JI (IC): “[Chief] not sick!”
AD (IC): “He was when we were done with him.”
To a healer:
KH (IC): “I don’t suppose you have a cure for the common cold?”
JI (IC): “I’m not a miracle worker.”
Reassuring a woman scorned:
AA (IC): “Go tell her - all men dogs.”
JI (OOC): “Says the cat.”
To the tune of “Like a G6”:
ST and KH: “Roll a d6, roll a d6!”
KH: “Of course it’s always about dirty sex - I’m a bard!”
AD: “The hell are you two talking about down there?!”
To a mindflayer, about a stupid character:
KH (IC): “I’d offer you his brain to eat, but I don’t think he has one.”
JS (IC as mindflayer): “I don’t eat junk food.”
MGW: “It’s Tza…Zsa…his name is Jasper.”
Saying goodbye to the barkeep:
MR (IC): “I’ll be back visiting the northern parts soon.”
KH (OOC): “And then you can visit her southern parts.”
About a questionable NPC:
ST (IC): “I would never dream of hurting you!”
KH (IC): “I would.”
About prison visitations:
JB (IC): “How often is it that a [gypsy] walks in here voluntarily?”
Failing a romance/persuasion check:
AA: “Ooh, she cast Zone of Friend!”
Preparing for a swamp adventure:
CD: “I want to buy some insect repellant.”
AD: “What, your personality doesn’t drive them away?”
About a magic boat:
JB (IC): “I saw it grow!”
ST (IC): “Are you sure you didn’t rub it? That sometimes happens with wood.”
JB (IC): “You would know.”
ST (IC): “You wouldn’t.”
JB (IC): “Tell that to my two children.”
About an injured drow:
MGW (IC): “Look at that poor girl! She has a black eye! You can’t see it, ‘cause her skin is black, but still!”
Last-minute aliases:
RD (IC): “Unfortunately, no, my name is Dick Ballsenshaft.”
To a half-orc and Sir Bearington, regarding weirdness:
MGW (IC): “…but for me to assume you’re in a loving relationship with a talking bear is where we draw the line?!”
Wisdom for stealing magic items:
KC: “Anything that glows goes.”
About fleeing:
RD: “I’m going to run like an Amazon employee during the holidays.”
MGW: “You were doing so well until everybody died.”
JF: “D&D in a summary.”
Once more about fleeing:
RD: “A smart man knows when to run like a little bitch.”
J: “Why do you think that’s the first thing I did?”
Recapping the previous session:
A: “There was a shitshow, but we got away with it.”
S: “So the usual, then.”
About creature size:
MR: “Is an ettin large or huge?”
MGW: “I think he’s just large.”
A: “He’s probably large but pretends he’s huge.”
AS: “Typical guy.”
When a pervy character is disgusted by a perv:
RD: “Dear Kettle, I have an issue with your current hue. Signed, the Pot.”
A: “He told us to send a message.”
KH: “A sword in the stomach is a message.”
SW: “The Lannisters send their regards.”
The pervy paladin:
A: “I used Lay On Hands. I healed him.”
KH: “Yeah, but where did you lay your hands?”
MGW: “Wherever she wanted.”
About our tactics:
SW: “We put the 'fun’ in 'dysfunctional.’”
About possible activities:
MGW (IC): “I know you’re a tiefling, but we’re all the same color in the dark, right?”
Interesting weapon material:
MGW: “You all take a moment of reflective silence.”
JB: “Nah, I’m just cleaning my bone.”
KH: “Technically that’s a moment of reflective silence.”
KC: “Not if you’ve seen the barbarian do it.”
Scrying like bad cell reception:
KH: “Switch to AD&D.”
JB: “Can you scry me now?”
About the taste of human:
SW: “You would know.”
A: “Nah, I don’t swallow.”
MR: “This conversation is making me uncomfortable.”
Wrestling prep:
MR (IC): “I want a good, clean fight.”
A (IC): “No we don’t.”
JB (IC): “What’s a clean fight?”
A (IC): “It means you have to take a bath first.”
JB (IC): “What’s a bath?”
MGW: “There’s a bridge that looks like it may have collapsed at some point.”
JB: “Is it a-bridged?”
Beautiful references (read in Rorschach’s voice):
AA: “I’m not grappled with YOU,”
ST, AA, and KH: “YOU’RE grappled with ME!”
About remaining spells:
KH: “I have three 1st-level slots and one 2nd-level slot.”
CD: “Those are 'keeping people alive’ slots.”
Dealing with extra-limbed gorillas:
ST: “Uh-oh! They must have been forewarned!”
AD: “What makes you say that?”
ST: “Forewarned is four-armed.”
AD: -_-
Negotiation skills:
AD: “It’s just me trying to bullshit him.”
JI: “Why don’t you make a bullshit check?”
Trying to figure out if the staff is necromantic:
CD: “We could kill a mouse in front of the staff. We could kill a mouse with the staff. How much is it to buy a mouse?”
JB: “Anyone die while I was gone?”
SW: “Not on the outside.”
Wizarding limits:
JS: “You may not polymorph your zombies into t-rexes.”
Zombies aren’t too smart:
BC (IC): “Bobs, attack the closest gnoll!”
Bobs: (run at gnoll party member)
KH (OOC): “Et tu, Bob?”
JS (OOC): “If this doesn’t belong in your blog, I dunno what does.”
Far too relatable:
JS: “Twenty psychic damage.”
BC: “I’ve taken more psychic damage from my mother.”
Worst-laid plans:
KH (IC): “I have a very bad feeling about this.”
MR (IC): “You should.”
Our go-to combat tactic:
MR: “Are we going to stupid the guy to death?”
Zing!:
MGW (IC): “If you join me, I can make you the greatest dwarf who ever lived.”
TP (IC): “I am the greatest dwarf who ever lived.”
Whole Table (OOC): “Ooooohhhhh!!!”
Another verbal duel with a sea god/character class limitations:
KH: “I would say 'what is a god to a nonbeliever,’ but I’m a cleric.”
Activating the mysterious device:
BC (IC): “We did it! I wonder what we did?”
Business as usual:
KH: “This seems like a bad idea, but go ahead.”
Old adages:
MR: “No plan survives contact with the enemy.” (IC) “But then, no enemy has survived contact with us!” (OOC) “Was that quote-worthy?”
KH: “Yes.”
KC: “She can ride me. I don’t care.”
KH: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
KC: “…I’M A BEAR IN ARMOR.”
Advantageous druidic inanity:
KC: “Are you still riding the flying bear?”
MR: “It’s flying now?”
KC: “Yeah, he flew up to unlock the door.”
AS: “…So he’s a flying bear with armor…”
Spell modifications for humourous purposes:
MR: “Using a Dex[terity] save for Zone of Truth means they’re literally dodging the question.”
About a wild, crazy, out-of-left-field hypothesis:
RD (IC): “I figured if you pulled something that big our of your ass there’d be bleeding involved.”
MR (IC): “…That’s between me and my proctologist.”
SW (OOC): “Did you take fire damage for that? That’s like Taco Bell levels of burn.”
As is per usual:
MR: “We may have once again survived this by the skin of bullshit.”
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The Aftermath
by Sergeant_Darwin
On October 16th, 2009, a boy by the name of Finn Carlton walked into the band room of my high school and closed the door behind him. He pulled a pistol from his coat pocket and fired six shots. Then he tied his belt around a pipe on the ceiling and hanged himself.
Six shots; seven bodies. That’s what the authorities found when they entered the room. Finn’s victims were apparently made to kneel in a straight line before they were executed, and their half-eaten lunches had been spoiled by the carnage. Six rounds. Six heads. One bullet each.
Chloe Cannon—15 years old, loved the color blue, played the French horn. Cute in a mousy sort of way. Murdered.
Xavier Mayweather—15 years old, on the track team, always rode his bike to school. Murdered.
Ronald “RJ” Saldaz—16 years old, had a notebook he sketched in, already bought his tickets to the midnight premiere of the new Harry Potter movie. Murdered.
Zach Trainor—15 years old, 280 pounds, played the tuba. Refused, several times, to join the football team. Murdered.
Marianne Ortega—15 years old, barely spoke English, liked horror films. Murdered.
Christopher Carlton—16 years old, played the French horn, secretly dating Chloe Cannon. Murdered. By his older brother, no less.
I didn’t know any of these students in life. But I know them all too well in death. And I hate each one of them with my whole heart.
This all went down during my junior year. Our school was closed for a few days, but it’s amazing how quickly business as usual returns. A grief assembly, a memorial plaque in the band room, and bam—it’s like everyone’s forgotten. Everyone’s moved on. Everyone except me.
Myself, I never experienced the grief. I didn’t know any of these kids, and while I felt for my peers who were close to them, my life wasn’t really affected by their gruesome ends. Sure, there was the existential shock, the “life is fleeting” realization, but I’d already lost a sibling in a freak accident years before. I was familiar with death. That’s why, in the weeks following the tragedy, I didn’t have any trouble sleeping.
So there I was, a month after the shooting, on a school night, not having any trouble sleeping. I had forgotten to silence my phone, so when I got a text, it buzzed on the wooden nightstand near my bed. Groggily, I rolled over to check it and was instantly jerked awake by what I read:
IM GOING TO KILL HER BOTH OF THEM SURE WHY NOT
“Jesus,” I muttered, eyes fixed on the macabre message, a threatening collection of black pixels backed by a heartless electric glow. I found a morbid fascination then, as I do now, in letters—meaningless squiggles, by themselves, which can combine to strike with more terror than the steepest cliff or the most menacing beast. The combination of these particular squiggles drilled a strangely familiar fear into my heart.
I glanced to see what number the message had come from, but that field was blank. It appeared as though the text had not been sent by anything at all. Frantically, I hit reply: “What? Who is this??” I waited for a few minutes, but received no response. Unsettled, I got out of bed and turned on the light. I wanted to do something, I just didn’t know what. Finally, after staring around my room for a moment, I decided I’d splash my face with water.
I went to the bathroom and looked myself in the mirror. A good, long, hard look. Staring myself down, willing myself to get a grip. Finally, I splashed my face with the icy pour from the tap. I patted dry with the hand towel and went back into my room. My phone’s LED was blinking from the nightstand—I’d received a text message. I shut the door, turned off the lights and took a step toward my bed, wondering somewhat anxiously if the new message was a reply from whoever had sent the previous one. But I’d barely moved before I stopped dead in my tracks.
I wasn’t alone. There, hovering in front of my nightstand, faintly luminescent and barely visible, was a girl—a tiny, mousy-looking girl, a girl who was strangely pretty in a non-obvious way, a girl who would never celebrate her Sweet 16 or stretch her undersized legs to reach the pedals of a car. A girl who was dead.
Chloe Cannon wore a thin blue nightgown that reached her knees. Her feet did not touch my floor. She bobbed slightly, up and down in the air, seemingly staring not at me but at a point in the wall directly behind me. She appeared both solid and not—her skin had a distinct silver pallor yet I could see the light on my phone blinking through her torso. Her face looked vaguely sad. I could not move; I could not speak.
We remained still, together, for what felt an eternity. Finally, I convinced myself that I was imagining things. I took a step toward her. Then another. Another. But not another. I could not bring myself to step closer, because as I neared her, her face began to change. Her left cheekbone began to sag. Her skull began to dent. Her eyeball began to rotate and protrude from its socket. A dark spot began to appear amid her fine, silvery hair. I backed away in horror and the bullet’s fatal blow faded from sight as quickly and seamlessly as it had appeared. In desperate panic, I flicked the light switch up.
She was gone. I heaved a sigh of relief. I had been seeing things. I thought perhaps the shooting had affected me more than I’d let myself believe. Still, my knees wobbled—I could barely even stand. Bracing myself against the wall with my arm, I stared at the blinking notification light on my phone. Eventually, my curiosity over who had sent that morbid message was too much. I flicked off the light—no hovering girl, that was good—and scrambled into bed. Safely under my covers, I grabbed my phone and opened the second text message. This time, I found no morbid fascination in the squiggles before me. These five letters and two punctuation marks, backed by a harsh glow in the comfortless dark, carried only dread.
CHLOE :)
I didn’t know Finn Carlton. To this day, when people hear what high school I went to, they usually ask me if I was acquainted with the scrawny kid who murdered his brother and five others before stringing himself up in the pipes. They ask it with a sort of reality-show fascination, and it feels like they’re only asking so they can later tell their equally fascinated friends that they knew a guy who knew the guy. And their face always falls a bit when I say no, no I didn’t. I’d never seen him before.
Of course, that’s not entirely true. Finn actually didn’t live too far from me, and we both walked home from school most days. I was a year younger than him, and we truly didn’t know one another in the least. Not a word was ever exchanged between us. Still, I knew who he was. I stared at his backpack some days on my way home—black, with bright green trim. The green was my favorite shade. I have to admit, it was a pretty cool backpack.
I suppose part of the reason I tell people I didn’t know Finn is that it’s simpler than going into detail about how I really didn’t know him but I knew of him and sometimes stared at his backpack when I walked home from school. But there’s another reason, too, and I’m reminded of it every time his victims come to me, when I’m scared and cold and in lonely moments: I’m ashamed.
I checked myself into a loony bin (oh, pardon me, a psychiatric hospital) the year after I graduated. That’s how bad things had gotten. I’d never seen Chloe again, but I’d seen all the others. By this point, Xavier and Zach chilled in my room practically every night. They never hurt me—but if I got too close, their faces would fall out of place and their death wounds emerge.
If I’m being perfectly honest, they didn’t scare me that much. They didn’t seem to bear me ill will—apart from that bizarre message the night I saw Chloe, they seemed content to merely hang about, and their presence had become almost comforting. If they were real, I figured I could handle that. No, what truly frightened me was the idea that they might not be real, that I might in fact be out of my fucking mind. All I wanted was to live a normal life. Xavier, Zach and the others weren’t getting in the way of that, but a mental illness certainly would.
I thought it would be an easy process—“Hey, doc, I’m going nuts, can you lock me up for a while and hit me with some meds?”—but it’s not that simple. As it turns out, there’s a lot involved in admitting oneself into the farm, not the least of which is a series of probing interviews with psychiatric professionals. I know they mean well, but in my experience, chats with these quacks usually do more harm than good. They drag up stuff that your mind hides, and sometimes your mind hides that stuff for a reason. I must have met a dozen people who went in for a five-minute checkup and came out remembering how their uncle used to touch them when they were kids.
For me, it didn’t happen quite that way. I was in my third and final interview, this one with the head of the institution herself, when I finally remembered. It wasn’t gradual. It came all at once. I broke down sobbing, realizing what I’d done, what responsibility I bore. It’s a surreal experience, to forget. Not just to have something slip your mind, like where you put your keys, but to really, truly, forget. I wish I had forgotten forever.
Seeming a bit taken aback by my outburst, the hospital administrator signed a piece of paper and tried to hand it to me, telling me it would account for at least a ninety-day stay. But I barely heard. I wiped the snot from my nose, blinking back tears, and stared behind her in horror, where Chloe Cannon hovered, the strange sad look still etched on her face. It was the first time I had seen her since that night, long ago, in my room. I pointed behind the lady, shrieking.
“She’s there! She’s there!”
Now thoroughly alarmed, the administrator whipped her head around, and then, apparently seeing nobody, pressed a button on her desk. The paper she had been trying to hand over fluttered to the ground. As the men in the white coats came to restrain me, I wrenched my gaze from Chloe and looked at the paper, face up on the concrete floor. And as they dragged me from the room, I saw a message written, in the unmistakable handwriting of a teenage girl, where the administrator had signed:
WITH MY DADS GUN I GUESS OF COURSE I KNOW WHERE HE KEEPS IT
Chloe’s face, twisted in a cruel smirk, was the last thing I saw before all went black.
October 15th, 2009. Chloe Cannon and her friends had less than 24 hours to live. Of course, they didn’t know that then. Nobody did. It was just a regular day in our regular town.
School had been out for half an hour, and I was on my way home—and who was right in front of me? You guessed it, boys and girls, Finn Carlton. I walked a few dozen paces behind him, my feet crunching the leaves on the sidewalk, my breath barely visible in the brisk autumn air. I stared at the green trim on his black backpack. God, it was a good-looking backpack.
His head hung and his shoulders were slumped. That was odd. I mean, the kid never had great posture, but on this day he looked like his books weighed a hundred pounds. He was sniffling a lot, too. I can’t be sure, but I think he was crying.
I didn’t care much about that, though. Finn Carlton’s problems were none of my concern—at least, that’s what I thought at the time. No, most of my thoughts were on my mother. She didn’t have work that day, and that usually meant she had a damn fine meal waiting for the family at home. And I know you all think your mothers can cook a damn fine meal, but trust me, they wouldn’t even compare.
Anyway, Finn had barely even crossed my mind until he reached in his pocket. He pulled out a ringing cell (a flip phone—2009 was a simpler time) and answered it.
“What do you want?” His voice seemed thick, like a guy trying to sound more masculine than he felt.
At first, my ears barely even registered the first half of the conversation.
“No, I can’t . . . I can’t ask her . . . Because, man, I think you already know . . . Dude, she’s with Chris . . . Yes, my brother Chris, what other fucking Chris would I be talking about?”
My ears perked up a bit. Drama. Just what I needed to take the boredom out of this brutally dull walk. I quickened my stride somewhat, hoping to get a bit closer and catch more of the conversation. I took care to avoid the leaves on the sidewalk, not wanting to draw Finn’s attention to my presence. He continued:
“No, I’m not guessing, I saw them kiss . . . I don’t know, next to the band room . . . Are you fucking high? Of course it was her . . . Yeah, you’re telling me. I feel like shit. I’m losing my fucking mind over here.”
I didn’t know who the girl he mentioned was, but I did know of his brother Chris. He was a year younger than me, and it always struck me as strange that he and Finn were related—while Finn was quiet, scrawny, and a bit morose-seeming, Chris was a handsome, upbeat kid who gave off the impression that he was going places in life.
“Oh yeah, dude, that was the last straw,” Finn continued, his voice shaking with rage. “You have no fucking idea how done I am with this shit.” Then he was silent for a long time. Finally, he spoke again, and his voice sounded different. Lower. Meaner.
“I’m going to kill her . . . Both of them, sure. Why not?”
My blood instantly turned to ice. I stopped dead in my tracks. Did he just say what I think he just said?
Finn laughed, a harsh, excited laugh, then spoke again. “With my dad’s gun, I guess . . . Of course I know where he keeps it.”
My head was reeling. I stood, alone, on the sidewalk, my breath short and my heartbeat quick. I tried to force what I had just heard from my mind. Surely he couldn’t be serious. But God, he sounded like he was. He sounded deadly serious. I don’t think I’ve heard that tone of voice from anyone else in my life.
Finn had continued walking and was almost out of earshot. He stepped further and further away, and I had no interest in hearing any more of his conversation. I felt sick to my stomach. I was only close enough to hear one final sentence before he trailed off:
“I don’t know, man—tomorrow’s as good a day as any.”
It happened the next day, at lunch. I was in the cafeteria, sitting at the usual table with the usual people, when a pop, muffled but clearly audible, rang through the air. A few seconds passed, then another. Another. Another. By the third pop, the cafeteria was silent. By the sixth, pandemonium had ensued. Students trampled over one another in their flight to the west exit, away from that sound. Teachers tried unsuccessfully to give the mob order. Everyone—myself included—was getting the hell out of there.
As I ran with the crowd, my thoughts were with Finn Carlton, who was presently undoing his belt and staring at a pipe on the ceiling of the locked band room. Those pops rang in my head, grisly echoes playing over and over and over, getting louder and louder and louder. This is your fault, is all I can think. This is your fault.
Bang.
Bang.
Bang!
The final knock on my cell door awoke me. Perhaps cell is too harsh a word—it was a nice room. They took good care of me. Still, when I climbed out of bed and saw those beautiful words on my calendar—DAY 90—I dressed with a little pep in my step.
I could have left at any time, of course, but the paperwork would have been so complicated. That, and I couldn’t think of anything better to do on the outside. So I stayed, for three long months, talking to therapists and swallowing pills and sharing my feelings in hilarious group circles with other inmates who were actually crazy. And that’s the thing, the one thing I learned from my time in the funny farm: They were crazy. I wasn’t.
No, Chloe Cannon was real, in life and in death—as real as my fingers flying over my keyboard right now, telling you my story. Her secret boyfriend, Christopher Carlton, he’s real too. So is Xavier Mayweather, and Marianne Ortega, and RJ Saldaz, and every last pound of big Zach Trainor. They’re all real, realer to me than they ever were alive, even though they’re all lying in the frozen December ground with traces of lead still in their heads. They’re all real, and they won’t leave me alone, and why should they?
I’m the reason RJ never got to use those Harry Potter tickets. The newspapers reported tirelessly on the victims after the shooting, and one of the details they really harped on was that RJ was a huge Harry Potter fan and that he’d bought tickets for the upcoming midnight premiere months in advance. I think J.K. Rowling even sent some nice shit to his family. I didn’t catch the movie in theaters, but I got it on Redbox a few months later. I wish I could say I was alone when I watched it, but RJ didn’t miss a single frame.
I’m the reason that the kiss shared between Chloe Cannon and Chris Carlton, the kiss they meant to hide but that was seen by a jealous brother anyway, was their last. I’m the reason Xavier never broke five minutes in the mile, the reason Marianne never learned better English, the reason Zach never lost all the weight he’d meant to. I’m the reason they’re all dead.
I got Chloe’s final message in an email two years ago:
TOMORROWS AS GOOD A DAY AS ANY
--CHLOE :)
Though I see her every night, she hasn’t spoken to me since. There’s so much she could say, but I think she’s choosing—somehow, some way—to let it remain unsaid. Isn’t it better if I fill in the gaps?
What’s it like to still be alive?
How can you live with yourself?
You could have saved us.
She never says it. None of them ever do. I don’t even know if they can. But as they crowd around my bed every night, all six of them, I can feel it in their stares. They all want to be alive, and they’ll haunt me as long as I draw the breath they crave. I’m not crazy, I’m not hallucinating, I’m not a freak—I’m simply and overwhelmingly consumed by guilt.
I have a gun that I keep in the corner of my closet, a gun not unlike the one Finn Carlton stole from his dad’s dresser, in a box that you could only find if you’re looking for it. I look for it sometimes. I pull it out sometimes, too. And every once in a while, I put a bullet in it, close the chamber, and hold it to my temple with a trembling, sweaty palm. Every time I do, I feel my six friends, my six tormentors, cheering me on. But I’ve never pulled the trigger. Not yet. I guess the time’s just never seemed right, but perhaps there’s no sense in putting it off any longer. From where I sit now, I can see the box—just the corner, peeking out from the top of my closet. Taunting me. Daring me. When will I give in?
I don’t know, man—tomorrow’s as good a day as any.
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MV Bill – Rapstência – Feat. Kmila CDD (Prod. Nixon)
MV Bill feat Kmila CDD
Produção musical,mixagem e masterizaçao: Nixon
Ouça em todas as plataformas: https://ONErpm.lnk.to/Rapstencia
Direção / Fotografia / Edição: Pedro Moraes
Finalização: DaRua Produtora
Assistente de direção: Lucas Araujo
Produção geral: Jefferson Gonzo (Nino Brown)
Imagens aéreas: João Maia
Fotógrafo Still: Cadu Andrade
Assistente de set: Leonardo Fonseca
Figurino: Carol Delgado
Caetering: Visão Producer
Apoios Projeto Morrinho, Nike e CUFA.
RAPSTÊNCIA
Sou essência, sou história, sou favela
Se tá marcado na agenda a gente não cancela
Muitos anos nesse chão
Mais que profissão
Viajei pelo planeta dividindo rimas com o meu irmão, foda!
Muito aprendizado pra minha caminhada
Os que torceram contra não me representam nada
Boto fé em todo mundo
Que ora pela gente fortalecendo a irmandade
Dignidade que trago no pente
Invejosos que ficaram no passado
Vermes só rastejam não caminham do meu lado
Muita vivência
Desde o primeiro disco
Eu tava lá, pronta, fime na jogada pro meu time não falhar
Não desanimar
Marcando nosso nome da cena
Orgulho de ser preta, nunca passei como morena
Nunca me sinto pequena, diante daquele falador
Que apontou, conspirou, me atacou, recuou
Não soube lidar com a longevidade do gueto e se enforcou.
REFRÃO Botar em prática a vocação, pra quem tá, entender como que foi construído
Transição com atualização pra deixar nosso verso um pouco mais evoluído
Foda-se as visualizações, a meta continua adentrar nos corações
Rapstência, tem potência, somos cria, só família, com vivência
Mas sempre tem aquele que arrasta, que sofre com o crescimento alheio e se afasta
O descontrolado tá afim de controlar
Seja diferente, não derrube, ajude a levantar
Just another nigga
Briga com cachorro morto é covardia, ignorância pra mim
Não tá a frente da diplomacia
Contra o improvável várias pontes construímos
Devedores, faladores no caminho destruímos
Portugês e favelês, eu sou formado poliglota
Virei cidadão do mundo baseado no RJ
Eu também boto fé, sou velha guarda
E vi de tudo
Vi malandro falador que tinha voz e ficou mudo
A promeça de sucesso sucumbiu virou fracasso
Também vi bons MC’s ocupando vários espaços
Quem se atualiza, não se vitimiza, curte a brisa
Honrando a camisa o brabo não avisa
Tô vivendo avançando
Marcando meu nome na história do Rap que marcou
REFRÃO Botar em prática a vocação, pra quem tá entender como que foi construído
Transição com atualização pra deixar nosso verso um pouco mais evoluído
Foda-se as visualizações, a meta continua adrentar nos corações
Rapstência, tem potência, somos cria, só família, com vivência.
Elenco
DJ Tamy
DJ Flávia Xexéo
DJ Tony
Luck Gbcr
Bboy Vitin
DonCapuccino
Tekinho
Paulo Gomes
Anderson Quack
Mano Tales
Sandro Gambino
Andre problematico
Luiza
Sistah
Criz Grafitt
Bgirl Val
Bgirl Roberta
Bboy Luck
Bboy Vitin
Bboy Júlio
Bboy Dublack
Bboy Alion
Bboy Karpa
Bboy Tharryz
AGRADECIMENTOS ESPECIAIS:
Favela Parereira da Silva
Espaço CUFA Madureira
Digao
Tom Camelo
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Guía de series: Estrenos y regresos de marzo 2019
Nos fascina la gran variedad de novedades que nos trae este mes. Verídico. Y estamos seguros de que recordaremos varias de las ficciones que están por venir. No te queremos decir cuáles son para que puedas disfrutar probando y abandonando.
¡Feliz marzo!
Leyenda:
Verde: series nuevas.
Rojo: series de las que haremos reviews semanales.
Negro: regresos de otras series.
Naranja: miniseries o series documentales.
Amarillo: tv movies, documentales, especiales o pilotos.
Morado: season finales.
Púrpura: midseason finales.
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Calendario de series
1 de marzo:
Northern Rescue (1T completa) y The Boy Who Harnessed The Wind en Netflix
The Widow (1T) en Amazon
3 de marzo:
Good Girls (2T) en NBC
Leaving Neverland en HBO
4 de marzo:
Fleabag (2T) en BBC Three
Jerk (1T) en BBC One
Leaving Neverland en HBO
5 de marzo: Derry Girls (2T) y Home (1T) en Channel 4
6 de marzo:
MotherFatherSon (1T) en BBC Two
White Gold (2T) en BBC Two
7 de marzo:
The Order (1T completa) en Netflix
Station 19 (vuelve) y For the People (2T) en ABC
Superstore (vuelve) y AP Bio (2T) en NBC
8 de marzo: After Life (1T completa), Walk. Ride. Rodeo. y Juanita en Netflix
10 de marzo:
Now Apocalypse (1T) en Starz
The Case Against Adnan Syed en Amazon
Midsomer Murders (20T) en ITV
Crashing (3T finale) en HBO
11 de marzo:
American Gods (2T) en Starz
Cheat (1T) en ITV
Timewasters (2T) en ITV2
13 de marzo:
Triple Frontier en Netflix
Bounty Hunters (2T completa) en Sky One
SEAL Team (vuelve) en CBS
14 de marzo:
The Good Fight (3T) en CBS All Access
Porters (2T) en Dave
15 de marzo:
Arrested Development (5bT completa), Turn Up Charlie (1T completa), Love Death + Robots (1T completa) y Dry Martina en Netflix
Shrill (1T completa) en Hulu
17 de marzo: Billions (4T) en Showtime
18 de marzo:
The Fix (1T) en ABC
9-1-1 (vuelve) en FOX
Life in Pieces (4T) en CBS
19 de marzo:
The Village (1T) en NBC
Teachers (series finale) en TV Land
20 de marzo:
The Act (1T) en Hulu
Step Up: High Water (2T completa) en YouTube Premium
The Perfectionists (1T) en Freeform
22 de marzo:
Gigantes (2T) en Movistar +
The OA (2T), Coisa Mais Linda (1T completa), Historia de un crimen: Colosio, Delhi Crime Story y The Dirt en Netflix
24 de marzo: Into the Badlands (3bT y última) en AMC
25 de marzo: Knightfall (2T) en History
26 de marzo: Absentia (2T) en AXN España
27 de marzo:
Jane the Virgin (5T y última) en The CW
Happy! (2T) en Syfy
What We Do in the Shadows (1T) en FX
28 de marzo: Abby's (1T) en NBC
29 de marzo: Osmosis (1T completa), Santa Clarita Diet (3T completa) y Highwaymen en Netflix
31 de marzo: Veep (7T y última) y Barry (2T) en HBO
*
Estrenos de series
The Widow (Amazon)
Georgia Wells (Kate Beckinsale; Underworld, Pearl Harbor) cortó los lazos con su vida anterior tras la muerte de su marido Will (Matthew Le Nevez; Offspring, The Kettering Incident), hace tres años, en el Congo, pero deberá enfrentarse a ella cuando vea a su marido en las noticias. Viajará a Kinsasa y no se detendrá ante nada para conocer la verdad. Le acompañarán Charles Dance (Game of Thrones, And Then There Were None), Alex Kingston (Doctor Who, A Discovery of Witches), Jacky Ido (The Catch), Ólafur Darri Ólafsson (Ófærð, Lady Dynamite), Louise Brealey (Sherlock, A Discovery of Witches) o Babs Olusanmokun (The Defenders, Sneaky Pete). Creada por Harry y Jack Williams, creadores de The Missing y Liar, y dirigida por Sam Donovan (Utopia, Liar) y Olly Blackburn (StartUp, Victoria). Ocho episodios.
Estreno: 1 de marzo
Northern Rescue (Netflix)
Tras morir su esposa Sarah, un padre (William Baldwin; Gossip Girl, Dirty Sexy Money) vuelve con sus tres hijos al pueblo donde nació para liderar el servicio de búsqueda y rescate. Allí les recibe Charlie (Kathleen Robertson; Boss, Murder in the First), la hermana de Sarah. Participan también Spencer Macpherson (Reign, Degrassi), Taylor Thorne (Condor), Nicola Correia-Damude (Shadowhunters, Burden of Truth), Christian Maryn (Anne with an E) y Sebastien Roberts (Mary Kills People). Creada y escrita por David Cormican, productor de Shadowhunters y Between. Diez episodios.
Estreno: 1 de marzo
Jerk (BBC One)
Tim (Tim Renkow) tiene parálisis cerebral, y la gente le juzga erróneamente, porque no se dan cuenta de que dentro de ese cuerpo impedido y frágil se esconde un gilipollas. Sabe que hace sentir incómoda a la gente, y lo hace a propósito, puede decir lo que otros no pueden e irse de rositas, y su madre (Lorraine Bracco; The Sopranos, Goodfellas), su cuidadora Ruth (Sharon Rooney; My Mad Fat Diary, Two Doors Down) y su amigo Idris (Rob Madin) tienen que salvarlo de las desastrosas situaciones que causa. Escrita por Renkow. Cuatro episodios. La temporada completa está disponible online desde el 24 de febrero.
Estreno: 4 de marzo
Home (Channel 4)
Sami (Youssef Kerkour; Nightflyers, Marcella) es un refugiado sirio que entró ilegalmente a Inglaterra rogando asilo y ahora vive con Peter (Rufus Jones; W1A, Flack), Katy (Rebekah Staton; Ordinary Lies, Raised by Wolves) y John (Oaklee Pendergast; Marcella, Camping), su nueva familia, cambiando el concepto de hogar. Comedia creada por Rufus Jones. Seis episodios.
Estreno: 5 de marzo
MotherFatherSon (BBC Two)
Caden (Billy Howle; Glue, On Chesil Beach) es hijo de un gran empresario americano (Richard Gere; Chicago, Pretty Woman) y una heredera británica (Helen McCrory; Peaky Blinders, Penny Dreadful), dirige el periódico que su padre tiene en Londres y está preparado para seguir sus pasos y convertirse en uno de los hombres más poderosos del mundo, pero su estilo de vida autodestructivo amenaza el futuro de la familia, de su imperio e incluso del país. Completan el cast Elena Anaya (La piel que habito, Wonder Woman), Ciarán Hinds (The Terror, Game of Thrones), Sarah Lancashire (Happy Valley, Last Tango in Halifax), Sinéad Cusack (Marcella, V for Vendetta), Paul Ready (The Terror, Utopia), Pippa Bennett-Warner (Sick Note, Harlots), Danny Sapani (Penny Dreadful, Harlots), Niamh Algar (Pure), Jessica Gunning (Pride, Fortitude) y Joseph Mawle (Game of Thrones, The Tunnel). Creada por Tom Rob Smith (The Assassination of Gianni Versace, American Crime Story, London Spy) y dirigida por James Kent (The White Queen, 11.22.63). Ocho episodios.
Estreno: 6 de marzo
The Order (Netflix)
Jack Morton (Jake Manley; iZombie, Heroes Reborn) es un universitario que se une a una legendaria sociedad secreta que le presenta un mundo lleno de magia, intriga y monstruos donde descubre secretos familiares y una batalla entre los hombres lobo y las artes oscuras. Completan el reparto Sarah Grey (Power Rangers, Legends of Tomorrow), Matt Frewer (Orphan Black, Timeless), Sam Trammell (True Blood, This Is Us), Max Martini (The Unit, Revenge), Adam DiMarco (The Magicians, When We Rise), Louriza Tronco (Make It Pop, Spiral), Thomas Elms (I Still See You), Aaron Hale (Pure) o Devery Jacobs (Cardinal). Creada por Dennis Heaton (Motive, Ghost Wars) y Shelley Eriksen (Private Eyes, Continuum). Diez episodios.
Estreno: 7 de marzo
After Life (Netflix)
Comedia negra creada, producida, dirigida y protagonizada por Ricky Gervais (The Office, The Invention of Lying) sobre un hombre que, tras la repentina muerte de su esposa, decide olvidar sus pensamientos suicidas y vivir lo suficiente para castigar al mundo diciendo y haciendo todo lo que le apetezca sin preocuparse por él mismo ni por nadie. Participan también Tom Basden (Plebs, Quacks), David Bradley (Game of Thrones, The Strain), Roisin Conaty (Man Down, GameFace), Kerry Godliman (Bad Move, Derek), Ashley Jensen (Ugly Betty, Catastrophe), Paul Kaye (Game of Thrones, Wanderlust), Diane Morgan (Frayed, Him & Her), Tony Way (Game of Thrones, Zapped), Joe Wilkinson (Sex Education, Him & Her) y Penelope Wilton (Downton Abbey, Brief Encounters) y Tim Plester (Game of Thrones, Wolf Hall). Seis episodios.
Estreno: 8 de marzo
Now Apocalypse (Starz)
Comedia con tintes sobrenaturales escrita y dirigida por Gregg Araki (Mysterious Skin, Kaboom) sobre varios jóvenes en busca de amor, sexo y fama en Los Ángeles. El protagonista es Ulysses (Avan Jogia; Victorious, Ghost Wars), que es nuevo en la ciudad y comienza a tener pesadillas que le hablan de una siniestra conspiración, aunque podría ser culpa de fumar tanta hierba. Con él fliparán Kelli Berglund (Lab Rats, Fosse/Verdon), Beau Mirchoff (Awkward, Desperate Housewives), Roxanne Mesquida (Gossip Girl), Tyler Posey (Teen Wolf, Scream), Jacob Artist (Glee, Quantico), Chris Aquilino (Silicon Valley), Desmond Chiam (The Shannara Chronicles), RJ Mitte (Breaking Bad, Switched at Birth), Grace Victoria Cox (Under the Dome, Heathers), Kevin Daniels (Sirens), Avra Friedman (Stop the Bleeding), Evan Hart (House of Lies) y Taylor Hart. Producida por Steven Soderbergh (The Knick, The Girlfriend Experience). Diez episodios.
Estreno: 10 de marzo
Cheat (ITV)
Leah (Katherine Kelly; Happy Valley, The Night Manager) es profesora universitaria y Rose (Molly Windsor, Three Girls), su alumna. Su peligrosa relación comienza al copiar Rose en un examen y acaba en una serie de acontecimientos que amenazan con llevárselas por delante. Completan el reparto Tom Goodman-Hill (Humans, Mr. Selfridge), Lorraine Ashbourne (Unforgotten, Jericho), Peter Firth (Victoria, Spooks) y Adrian Edmondson (War & Peace, Holby City). Escrita por Gaby Hull (The Dark Mile, Benidorm), dirigida por Louise Hooper (Lucky Man, Cold Feet) y producida por los hermanos Williams (The Missing, Liar). Cuatro episodios.
Estreno: 11 de marzo
Turn Up Charlie (Netflix)
Creada, producida y protagonizada por Idris Elba (Luther, Thor), trata sobre un DJ soltero y acabado que se convierte a regañadientes en el niñero de la hija de once años (Frankie Hervey) de su amigo famoso (JJ Feild; Turn, The Romanoffs) mientras trata de reflotar su carrera. Participan también Piper Perabo (Covert Affairs, Coyote Ugly), Angela Griffin (Ordinary Lies, Brief Encounters), Guz Khan (Zapped, Curfew), Jocelyn Jee Esein (Upstart Crow, The Sarah Jane Adventures), Jade Anouka (Trauma, Cleaning Up), Cameron King (Hard Sun, Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children) y Dustin Demri-Burns (Sick Note, GameFace). Escrita por Laura Neal (Sex Education, My Mad Fat Diary), Femi Oyeniran (The Intent), Victoria Asare-Archer (Hetty Feather) y Georgia Lester (Skins, Hollyoaks). Dirigida por Tristram Shapeero (Community, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt) y Matt Lipsey (Sick Note, Little Britain). Ocho episodios.
Estreno: 15 de marzo
Shrill (Hulu)
Annie (Aidy Bryant; Saturday Night Live, Horace and Pete) busca formas de cambiar su vida sin cambiar su cuerpo. Tan buena en su trabajo como cualquier otra, quiere trabajar como periodista mientras lidia con un jefe perfeccionista, unos padres enfermos y unos novios pésimos. Completan el cast Lolly Adefope (Loaded, Damned), Julia Sweeney (Saturday Night Live), Luka Jones (People of Earth, Pillow Talk), Ian Owens y John Cameron Mitchell (Mozart in the Jungle, Girls). Basada en las memorias de Lindy West, está escrita por la propia West, Bryant y Alexandra Rushfield (Parks and Recreation, Love). Producida por Elizabeth Banks (Pitch Perfect) y Lorne Michaels (Saturday Night Live, 30 Rock). Seis episodios.
Estreno: 15 de marzo
The Fix (ABC)
Thriller legal escrito y producido por la fiscal Marcia Clark, a la que conocemos gracias al juicio de O.J. Simpson. En él, Maya Travis (Robin Tunney; The Mentalist, Prison Break), fiscal del distrito de Los Ángeles, sufrió una gran derrota en el juicio al famoso actor Sevvy Johnson (Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje; Lost, Oz) por doble asesinato y, tras perder el control de su carrera, se mudó a Washington para disfrutar de una vida más tranquila. Ocho años después, Johnson es sospechoso de otro asesinato y Maya regresa a L.A. buscando una segunda oportunidad de hacer justicia. Completan el reparto Adam Rayner (Tyrant, Notorious), Merrin Dungey (Big Little Lies, The Resident), Breckin Meyer (Franklin & Bash, Garfield), Marc Blucas (Underground, Necessary Roughness), Mouzam Makkar (Champions, The Exorcist), Alex Saxon (The Fosters, Finding Carter) y Scott Cohen (Necessary Roughness, Gilmore Girls). Diez episodios.
Estreno: 18 de marzo
The Village (NBC)
Nada que ver con la serie de BBC ni con la película de Shyamalan. Es un drama sobre un edificio de apartamentos cuyos vecinos han formado una familia. Protagonizada por Moran Atias (Tyrant, The Resident), Dominic Chianese (The Sopranos, The Good Wife), Warren Christie (Motive, The Resident), Frankie Faison (Banshee, The Wire), Jerod Haynes (Crisis), Daren Kagassof (The Secret Life of the American Teenager, Red Band Society), Michaela McManus (Aquarius, One Tree Hill), Lorraine Toussaint (Orange Is the New Black, Rosewood), Grace Van Dien (Greenhouse Academy), Nadine Nicole (Casual, The Expanse), Hailey Kilgore (Once On This Island), Guy Lockard y Katrina Lenk (The Good Fight, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel). Escrita por Mike Daniels (Sons of Anarchy, The Vampire Diaries). Diez episodios.
Estreno: 19 de marzo
The Act (Hulu)
Fue anunciada como una antología true crime que centraría cada temporada en un caso. La primera trata sobre Dee Dee Blanchard (Patricia Arquette; Medium, Boyhood), una madre que hizo creer al mundo que su hija Gypsy (Joey King; Fargo, The Kissing Booth) padecía múltiples enfermedades. Gypsy trató de escapar de esta tóxica relación junto a Nick (Calum Worthy; Austin & Ally, American Vandal), un chico que conoció por Internet. Cuenta también con Chloë Sevigny (American Horror Story, Big Love) y AnnaSophia Robb (The Carrie Diaries, Mercy Street). Escrita por Nick Antosca (Channel Zero, Hannibal) y Michelle Dean y basada en el artículo de Buzzfeed de Dean. Ocho episodios.
Estreno: 20 de marzo
The Perfectionists (Freeform)
Spin-off de Pretty Little Liars protagonizado por Alison (Sasha Pieterse) y Mona (Janel Parrish) en Beacon Heights, una ciudad en la que todo parece perfecto pero los secretos y mentiras de sus habitantes llevan al primer asesinato. El reparto está formado por Sofia Carson (Descendants, Famous in Love), Sydney Park (Instant Mom, The Walking Dead), Eli Brown, Chris Mason (Broadchurch, The Fades), Graeme Thomas King, Hayley Erin (General Hospital, Melissa & Joey), Jacques Colimon (The Society), Kelly Rutherford (Gossip Girl, Melrose Place), Noah Gray-Cabey (Heroes, Code Black), Evan Bittencourt (Chasing Life), Klea Scott (Intelligence, Pretty Little Liars), Garrett Wareing (A Better Place, Boychoir) y Phillip Rhys (Nightflyers, Nip/Tuck). Basada en la novela del mismo nombre, de Sara Shepard (2014) y creada también por I. Marlene King (Pretty Little Liars, Famous in Love). Escrita por Charlie Craig (Pretty Little Liars, The 100). Diez episodios.
Estreno: 20 de marzo
Coisa Mais Linda (Netflix)
A principios de los años 60, durante el nacimiento de la bossa nova, Maria Luiza (Maria Casadevall), una mujer de familia conservadora de São Paulo, abre un club en Río de Janeiro tras desaparecer su marido con todo su dinero y cambia totalmente de vida acompañada de Ligia (Fernanda Vasconcellos), Adelia (Pathy Dejesus) y Thereza (Mel Lisboa). Creada por Heather Roth y Giuliano Cedroni (Outros Tempos). Ocho episodios.
Estreno: 22 de marzo
What We Do in the Shadows (FX)
Comedia estilo falso documental sobre tres vampiros que han sido compañeros de piso durante miles de años. Adaptación de la película de 2014 escrita, dirigida y protagonizada por Jamaine Clement (Flight of the Conchords) y Taika Waititi (Thor Ragnarok, Hunt for the Wilderpeople). La serie está escrita por Clement, dirigida por Waititi y protagonizada por Matt Berry (Toast of London), Kayvan Novak (Danger Mouse, Thunderbirds Are Go), Natasia Demetriou (Year Friends) y Harvey Guillen (The Thundermans, The Internship). Diez episodios.
Estreno: 27 de marzo
Abby's (NBC)
Abby's es el bar sin licencia que ha montado Abby (Natalie Morales; Parks and Recreation, Santa Clarita Diet) en el patio trasero de su casa, en San Diego, y es difícil ganarse un sitio en él pero conseguirlo significa ser ya como de la familia. Comedia producida por Mike Schur (The Good Place, Parks and Recreation), escrita por Josh Malmuth (New Girl, Superstore) y dirigida por Pamela Fryman (How I Met Your Mother, One Day at a Time). Protagonizan también Nelson Franklin (Veep, Black-ish), Kimia Behpoornia (Station 19), Jessica Chaffin (Zoey 101, Search Party), Leonard Ouzts (Master of None) y Neil Flynn (The Middle, Scrubs). Diez episodios.
Estreno: 28 de marzo
Osmosis (Netflix)
Una nueva tecnología ayuda a la gente a encontrar a su alma gemela recopilando información directamente del cerebro. Pero encontrar el amor verdadero tiene un precio que hay que estar dispuesto a pagar. Varios jóvenes parisinos se ofrecen a probar la versión de prueba poniendo su destino en manos de la inteligencia artificial. Protagonizada por Hugo Becker (Baron Noir, Gossip Girl), Agathe Bonitzer (Belle Dormant), Stephane Pitti (Budapest), Gaël Kamilindi (22 minuty), Suzanne Rault-Balet (Philharmonia), Luna Silva, Manoel Dupont y Yuming Hey. Creada por Audrey Fouché (Les Revenants, Borgia). Ocho episodios.
Estreno: 29 de marzo
The Bay (ITV)
La detective Lisa Armstrong (Morven Christie; The A Word, Grantchester) investiga una desaparición en el pueblo costero de Morecambe. Está entrenada para apoyar a los familiares sin involucrarse emocionalmente, pero se da cuenta de que tiene una conexión personal que podría comprometer la investigación. Participan también Jonas Armstrong (Troy, Ripper Street), Tracie Bennett (Scott & Bailey, Coronation Street), Imogen King (Clique), Matthew McNulty (Misfits, The Terror), Lindsey Coulson (Funny Cow, Bulletproof), Chanel Cresswell (This Is England, Murdered for Being Different), Louis Greatorex (Safe, Last Tango in Halifax), Adam Long (Happy Valley, Peterloo), Daniel Ryan (Mount Pleasant, Black Sea) y Taheen Modak. Creada por Daragh Carville (Being Human, The Smoke). Seis episodios.
Estreno: Aún sin fecha
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New Look Sabres: GM 37 - ANA - Still Kicking
Two teams come into this game with two straight regulation losses: only one will come out with a W! I did some digging into past blogs and I discovered something weirdly encouraging: the Sabres came into this game after losing two games in a row in regulation. That’s not the encouraging part. The encouraging part is that this is only the second time this season the Sabres have lost two in a row in regulation and the last time was the 6th and 7th games back in October! Yea, there was that five game losing streak right after the big olde ten dubs but the Sabres played good in four of those and collected points in three. Kind of like Friday night in Washington when Buffalo played well but was just not rewarded for it. Last night in a tilt against the Anaheim Ducks the Sabres looked good again, this time in they looked good the kind of way that makes you excited for the postseason: the consistent way. Maintaining a narrow lead for most of the game the Mighty Sabres of Buffalo pounded out a hard fought win in front of a very merry sellout home crowd. Last game I just asked for a nice sendoff before the Christmas break and evidently my letter reached the North Pole because I got what I wished for! I must be a good boy. Of course it’s fair to say it’s the Anaheim Ducks and in spite of where they sit in the Pacific Division their just not that great a team. Yea, that’s fair. But within that shaky framework are a few pieces that won a Stanley Cup more than a decade ago the year the Sabres should’ve been there to meet them. And it’s also Christmastime so maybe just let yourself be happy about a win for goodness sake!
Having gone home for some Yuletide prep with the Fam I watched the first period on MSG TV next to my dad like it was 2011 all over again. Jolly. The Sabres came out immediately throwing the pressure on the Ducks, shots after shots after shots, and the visitors just kind of held on through it. John Gibson was clearly a big part of it. Jack Eichel got a chance, Tage Thompson got a good chance, friggin everyone hopped on the sleigh and got a chance. The Ducks did get to testing Linus Ullmark a little bit as the period went on. Then the Buffalo Sabres gave us their Christmas present to us: a rare gift that, barring another wicked win streak, is a truly meaningful gift to those of us who watch this team a lot: a powerplay goal. Set up in the offensive zone Jack Eichel got the puck to Rasmus Ristolainen who continues to be on a line with the other big Rasmus: Rasmus Dahlin to make Rasmus Squared. Risto got it to Dahlin who you could tell sized up a quick pass back to Eichel but instead skated toward Gibson and just rockets it in five hole. The noise of the home crowd was very audible. Funny thing, I think Dahlin happened to also go five hole on Reinhart who was doing an excellent job screening Gibson. That goal came a tad over three minutes left in the first period and nothing terrible noteworthy happened before the first horn sounded except an almost fight. Jeff Skinner must have been doing some trash talking with Ryan Getzlaf (which makes a ton of sense btw) because Zach Bogosian came rushing over like Getzlaf was about to punch a puppy. No puppies were punched and the second period began similarly with volley after volley of Sabres chances.
Ondrej Kase had a scary breakaway early in the second but didn’t get past Ullmark. There was an almost goal for Jack and Jeff that you could see how pissed the two were that they didn’t finish it. I don’t know about you but as the last minutes of the second period ticked by and the Sabres took a 1-0 lead into the third period there was a nervous energy. Now I’m listening to the radio broadcast en route back to Buffalo and I can’t help but get that feeling something is going to go south. The Sabres were on the penalty kill to start the period and once again the kill was strong under the guidance of Chief Killer Bogo and his newly returned co-conspirator Jake McCabe. Adam Henrique almost sneaked in a wraparound as the PP died but no line was crossed. The Ducks started to pour it on now. Three straight regulation losses is rough and they didn’t want it either. Linus Ullmark really got into the zone facing shots from just about every angle. And then, like getting the gift you’ve been asking for on Christmas morning, Jeff Skinner got the puck and skated in around the outside of the net and roofed it close quarters short side on John Gibson. 2-0 Sabres with 8:48 left in the third period. Insurance if I’ve ever seen an insurance goal. Small but massive note: that’s Jeff Skinner’s 26th goal this season. With that he beats the most goals a single Sabre scored last season at 25 whom Jack Eichel scored in an injury shortened season. Pretty unreal, eh? Seven or so minutes later as the Sabres increasingly push back against the Ducks the visitors pull their goalie and Conor Sheary finds the empty netter. The time ticked down to zero and Linus Ullmark’s second NHL career shutout and eighth win of his first season working part-time in Buffalo. The Buffalo Sabres win 3-0 over the Anaheim Ducks sweeping the season series with quacks for the first time since 2010-2011.
Now as the Sabres navigated that perilous 1-0 lead as the Ducks came at them hard early in the third period there was something far more worrisome afoot in Key Bank Center. The play-by-play call by Rick Jeanneret went more or less silent with a confused sounding Rob Ray trying to do color commentary and play-by-play for a time. Eventually, well known Sabres social media guidepost and pre/postgame host Brian Duff took over the color commentary somewhat awkwardly, but RJ did not return for the duration of the game. While officials for the team said an update on him would be given once more was known a few folks at the game said they saw RJ carried out on a stretcher. WGR 550 reported shortness of breath and heart problems. It was a difficult night trying to think about writing this while worrying about someone who embodies this franchise perhaps more than Gilbert Perrault or Alexander Mogilny. RJ is literally the longest serving NHL play-caller in league history having been with the Sabres since 1971. Think about that, if you’re under 20 then one or both of your parents were probably not born yet when RJ first took the microphone as their guy. He may deserve a banner in the rafters more than Danny Gare. Well, the update the Sabres delivered this morning was very encouraging saying he is resting, doing well and looking forward to being back after the Christmas break; but what he apparently texted to the Athletic’s John Vogl this morning is perhaps the most heartwarming message and weirdly accurate of where the team is at on the ice right now as well: simply “Still Kicking.” Incredible.
Now we go into a Christmas NHL break and a roster freeze to go with it. The Sabres play again on Thursday in St. Louis where they will meet Ryan O’Reilly in the better situation he was looking for… oh wait. All kidding aside, I want the best for O’Reilly. I have tickets to his return to Buffalo on St. Patrick’s Day because I know fun games when I see them. I will post a Amerks Angle for December after Christmas but before that game so if you just cannot wait for more content then you got something to look forward to: but if you are that person, well why haven’t you commented your words of yuletide encouragement!? Yes: comment, like and do share this blog on social media and amongst family and friends with holly jolly spirit! And just think about where you were with this team at Christmas last year: probably just about tapped out considering the season was pretty well dead already. What if I told you then the Sabres would be third in the Atlantic division nine points up on a playoff spot in spitting distance of the Maple Leafs? You probably wouldn’t believe me but if you did you would sign up for it in a heartbeat. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays and very glad tidings to you and your kinfolk! Let’s go Buffalo!
Thanks for reading.
P.S. Conor Sheary joked about his empty netter not counting after the game. If he starts scoring again after Christmas maybe it will count a lot in retrospect.
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All American Series
2017
30 – The Ingraham Angle
2016
26 – Fuller House
16 – Live! with Kelly
12 – Harry
19 – Kevin Can Wait
2015
12 – Little Charmers
17 – Bella and the Bulldogs
7 – Power Rangers Dino Charge
23 – The Late Late Show with James Corden
29 – Harvey Beaks
9 – Make It Pop
8 – The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
15 – The Bastard Executioner
28 – The Daily Show with Trevor Noah
30 – Code Black
17 – Chicago Med
2014
1 – Every Witch Way
7 – Killer Women
8 – Chicago P.D.
8 – Intelligence
10 – Enlisted
10 – Helix
20 – Sheriff Callie's Wild West
3 – Wallykazam!
17 – Breadwinners
17 – The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
22 – About a Boy
24 – Late Night with Seth Meyers
26 – Mixology
6 – Sirens (2014)
9 – Resurrection
19 – The 100
5 – Zack & Quack
6 – Silicon Valley
15 – Fargo
20 – Signed, Sealed, DELIVERED
22 – Faking It (2014)
27 – Girl Meets World
8 – The Knick
17 – Red Band Society
17 – The Mysteries of Laura
25 – How to Get Away with Murder
30 – Selfie
2 – A to Z
7 – The Flash (2014)
13 – Jane the Virgin
28 – Benched
7 – The Librarians (2014)
2013
11 – Sofia the First
20 – Chasing The Saturdays
21 – The Following
30 – The Americans (2013)
4 – Monday Mornings
14 – Zero Hour (2013)
19 – Cult
26 – Golden Boy
18 – Bates Motel
29 – Lalaloopsy
4 – Hannibal
15 – Henry Hugglemonster
20 – The Goodwin Games
25 – Sanjay and Craig
3 – The Fosters (2013)
11 – Twisted
8 – Disrupt with Karen Finney, Sam & Cat
23 – Devious Maids
24 – Under the Dome
10 – 101 Ways to Leave a Game Show
Orange Is The New Black
28 – Total Divas
3 – Rabbids Invasion
2 – Uncle Grandpa
9 – OK!TV
9 – The Test
13 – Wander Over Yonder
15 – Liv and Maddie
17 – Brooklyn Nine Nine
16 – The Arsenio Hall Show
23 – The Blacklist
23 – The Queen Latifah Show
23 – Mom
23 – Hostages
24 – The Wrong Mans
24 – Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.
24 – The Goldbergs
24 – Trophy Wife
25 – Back in the Game
26 – The Crazy Ones
26 – The Michael J. Fox Show
27 – MasterChef Junior
29 – Betrayal
29 – Hello Ladies
29 – Julius Jr.
29 – Masters of Sex
2 – Super Fun Night
3 – The Millers
3 – Sean Saves the World
3 – Welcome to the Family
7 – Peg + Cat
9 – The Tomorrow People
10 – Once Upon a Time in Wonderland
17 – Reign
25 – Dracula
28 – The Pete Holmes Show
2 – Rick and Morty
4 – Kirstie
4 – Mob City
2012
8 – House of Lies
8 – The Firm
10 – Shipping Wars
11 – Are You There, Chelsea?
12 – The Finder
12 – ¡Rob!
15 – Napoleon Dynamite
16 – Alcatraz
19 – Unsupervised
25 – Touch
4 – How to Rock
6 – Smash
7 – The River
1 – Awake
15 – Missing
21 – Bent
21 – Duck Dynasty
23 – Doc McStuffins
4 – Best Friends Forever
8 – The Client List
19 – Kathy
22 – Veep
11 – Common Law
11 – Bunheads
24 – The Newsroom
9 – Perception
4 – Robot and Monster
8 – Here Comes Honey Boo Boo
12 – Animal Practice
13 – Major Crimes
3 – Steve Harvey
3 – Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood
4 – Live! with Kelly and Michael
10 – The Ricki Lake Show
10 – Katie
17 – Revolution
17 – The Mob Doctor
24 – Partners (2012)
25 – The Mindy Project
25 – Ben and Kate
26 – The Neighbors
27 – Elementary
27 – Last Resort (2012)
30 – 666 Park Avenue
10 – Arrow
10 – Chicago Fire
10 – Nashville
16 – Emily Owens, M.D.
16 – Underemployed
2011
1 – Dan Vs.
1 – House of Anubis
4 – Live to Dance
7 – Young Justice
7 – Your OWN Show: Oprah's Search for the Next TV Star
9 – Bob's Burgers
9 – The Cape
9 – Episodes
9 – Shameless
11 – Let's Stay Together
11 – Lights Out
11 – Onion SportsDome
12 – Off the Map
13 – Police Women of Cincinnati
17 – Aircrash Confidential
17 – Being Human
17 – Harry's Law
17 – Heavy
17 – Skins
17 – Supah Ninjas
19 – Restaurant: Impossible
19 – Retired at 35
20 – Fairly Legal
20 – Perfect Couples
23 – Kourtney and Kim Take New York
23 – Mongo Wrestling Alliance
24 – Bubble Guppies
26 – Face Off
28 – Working Class
2 – Eagleheart
7 – The Chicago Code
8 – Only in America with Larry the Cable Guy
8 – Traffic Light
9 – Mr. Sunshine
12 – Must Love Cats
14 – Jake and the Never Land Pirates
14 – Mad Love
15 – Our America with Lisa Ling
16 – Criminal Minds: Suspect Behavior
22 – The Real Housewives of Miami
23 – Shedding for the Wedding
25 – Camelot
6 – After Lately
6 – America's Next Great Restaurant
6 – Breakout Kings
6 – Taking on Tyson
14 – Love & Hip Hop
29 – Body of Proof
1 – CHAOS
3 – The Borgias
3 – The Killing
4 – The Problem Solverz
6 – Breaking In
6 – Workaholics
7 – Gigolos
10 – Khloé & Lamar
11 – Drew Carey's Improv-A-Ganza
12 – Sports Show with Norm Macdonald
13 – Happy Endings
14 – The Paul Reiser Show
17 – Audrina
17 – Game of Thrones
26 – Repo Games
3 – The Looney Tunes Show
6 – A.N.T. Farm
9 – The Amazing World of Gumball
13 – Femme Fatales
24 – Soul Quest Overdrive
30 – Platinum Hit
30 – Single Ladies
1 – Franklin & Bash
2 – Love Bites
5 – Teen Wolf
6 – Switched at Birth
12 – The Glee Project
12 – The Protector
13 – Kickin' It
13 – Sidekick
13 – Almost Naked Animals
14 – Jon Benjamin Has a Van
14 – The Nine Lives of Chloe King
15 – Happily Divorced
16 – Voltron Force
19 – Falling Skies
21 – Combat Hospital
23 – Exp ion Impossible
23 – Suits
23 – Wilfred
25 – Friends with Benefits
28 – I Kid with Brad Garrett
29 – Love in the Wild
29 – Necessary Roughness
29 – State of Georgia
1 – Bucket & Skinner's Epic Adventures
11 – Alphas
13 – Roseanne's Nuts
15 – PrankStars
17 – Big Rich Texas
18 – Secret Mountain Fort Awesome
19 – Awkward.
19 – It's Worth What?
19 – Web Therapy
21 – National Terrorism Strike Force: San Diego: Sport Utility Vehicle
23 – Pocoyo
31 – Against the Wall
2 – Take the Money and Run
5 – Friends with Benefits
7 – Hillbilly Handfishin'
8 – Tia & Tamera
9 – Scaredy Squirrel
29 – PoliticsNation with Al Sharpton
12 – Anderson Cooper
12 – The Bill Cunningham Show
12 – The Jeremy Kyle Show
14 – H8R
17 – Danger Rangers
19 – 2 Broke Girls
19 – Night Calls
19 – Kung Fu Panda: Legends of Awesomeness
20 – New Girl
20 – Unforgettable
22 – Charlie's Angels (2011)
22 – Person of Interest
26 – Terra Nova
28 – Suburgatory
30 – Jessie
2 – Homeland
5 – American Horror Story
10 – American Guns
10 – Pajanimals
11 – Last Man Standing
18 – Man Up!
23 – Once Upon a Time
28 – Grimm
30 – Allen Gregory
21 – Live! with Kelly
21 – You Deserve It
25 – Tyler Perry's For Better or Worse
30 – Baseball Wives
30 – I Hate My Teenage Daughter
30 – The Exes
6 – Storage Wars: Texas
2010
3 – Frank the Entertainer in a Basement Affair
3 – Worst Cooks in America
4 – 18 to Life
4 – The Generations Project
5 – Howe & Howe Tech
5 – Wild Recon
6 – Apocalypse Man
8 – John Oliver's New York Stand-Up Show
11 – Blue Mountain State
11 – Fantasia for Real
13 – Solving History with Olly Steeds
14 – Carnie Wilson: Unstapled
16 – Pit Boss
17 – Human Target
18 – American Pickers
18 – My Life as Liz
21 – The Deep End
22 – Caprica
22 – Spartacus: Blood and Sand
25 – La La Land
26 – The Michael Vick Project
28 – Life Unexpected
1 – Kell on Earth
9 – Past Life
12 – Famous Crime Scene
13 – Kick Buttowski: Suburban Daredevil
14 – How to Make It in America
19 – Funny or Die Presents
19 – The Ricky Gervais Show
21 – The Family Crews
25 – Police Women of Maricopa County
28 – The Marriage Ref
1 – Little Parents, Big Charlie
2 – Parenthood (2010)
3 – 1000 Ways to Lie
5 – Who Do You Think You Are?
9 – Food Wars
10 – High Society
11 – Jerseylicious
11 – Sons of Tucson
14 – Fatal Attractions
14 – Hoarding: Buried Alive
14 – Minute to Win It
14 – Pretty Wild
15 – The Price of Beauty
16 – Justified
17 – Addicted
17 – Ugly Americans
21 – Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution
21 – Kirstie Alley's Big Life
24 – Fly Girls
24 – Is It Possible?
27 – The OCD Project
27 – Victorious
2 – Miami Medical
3 – Winners Bracket
4 – Good Luck Charlie
5 – Adventure Time
5 – Scooby-Doo! Mystery Incorporated
11 – Basketball Wives
11 – Brandy & Ray J: A Family Business
11 – Treme
11 – What Chilli Wants
12 – TNA Reaction
18 – Masterclass
19 – Baggage
19 – Romantically Challenged
20 – Ancient Aliens
22 – Sliced
23 – Ben 10: Ultimate Alien
23 – Generator Rex
28 – Happy Town
6 – MMA Live
16 – Check It Out! with Dr. Steve Brule
19 – The Good Guys
27 – 100 Questions
27 – Mall Cops: Mall of America
27 – Police Women of Memphis
27 – Svetlana
1 – Downtown Girls
2 – Are We There Yet?
6 – The Hard Times of RJ Berger
6 – Top Shot
7 – Neighbors from Hell
8 – Pretty Little Liars
9 – Work of Art: The Next Great Artist
9 – You're Cut Off!
10 – Bethenny Ever After
10 – Late Night Liars
13 – Cupcake Wars
13 – Unnatural History (TV series)
15 – Double Exposure
15 – It's Effin' Science
15 – Warren the Ape
16 – Bert the Conqueror
16 – Hot in Cleveland
20 – The Real L Word
21 – Inedible To Incredible
22 – Memphis Beat
27 – Mary Shelley's Frankenhole
28 – Huge
29 – Louie
9 – Haven
10 – Worst Case Scenarios
11 – The Glades
12 – Kid in a Candy Store
12 – Rizzoli & Isles
13 – Covert Affairs
15 – Fact or Faked: Paranormal Files
16 – DC Cupcakes
16 – Lucha Libre USA
16 – Man, Woman, Wild
18 – Strange Sex
20 – If You Really Knew Me
21 – 24 Hour Restaurant Battle
26 – Fish Warrior
27 – Growing Up Twisted
28 – Plain Jane
29 – On the Road with Austin & Santino
1 – Rubicon
7 – Power of 10
9 – Too Fat for 15
15 – The Great Food Truck Race
16 – The Big C
17 – Melissa & Joey
22 – Aarti Party
30 – Quints by Surprise
5 – Mel B: It's a Scary World
6 – Regular Show
6 – MAD
8 – Hellcats
8 – Terriers
9 – Nikita
10 – Fashion Police
12 – World of Jenks
14 – Sextuplets Take New York
15 – Outlaw
15 – Top Chef: Just Desserts
17 – Sym-Bionic Titan
19 – Boardwalk Empire
20 – Chase
20 – The Event
20 – Hoppus on Music
20 – Lone Star
20 – Mike & Molly
21 – Detroit 1-8-7
21 – Raising Hope
21 – Running Wilde
22 – Better with You
22 – The Defenders
22 – Pair of Kings
22 – Undercovers
22 – The Whole Truth
23 – My Generation
23 – Outsourced
23 – $h#! My Dad Says
24 – Fish Hooks
24 – Blue Bloods
26 – Sister Wives
28 – No Ordinary Family
29 – Law & Order: LA
2 – Planet Sheen
2 – T.U.F.F. Puppy
3 – Animal Mechanicals
5 – MegaStructures
8 – Gigantic
10 – Family Game Night
10 – My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic
10 – Pound Puppies
10 – The Twisted Whiskers Show
11 – Pictureka!
12 – Nick Swardson's Pretend Time
14 – The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills
15 – The Adventures of Chuck and Friends
15 – School Pride
16 – Tower Prep
18 – The Talk
20 – That's Tough
22 – Taylor Swift: Journey to Fearless
25 – Robotomy
26 – Auction Kings
28 – Police Women of Dallas
29 – R.L. Stine's The Haunting Hour
31 – The Walking Dead
4 – Oddities
5 – The Benson Interruption
5 – Hubworld
7 – Married to Rock
7 – Shake It Up
8 – Conan
9 – Auction Hunters
14 – Sarah Palin's Alaska
16 – Glory Daze
19 – Homemade Millionaire
21 – Brew Masters
22 – Skating with the Stars
26 – G.I. Joe: Renegades
28 – Bridalplasty
29 – Transformers: Prime
1 – Storage Wars
6 – Next Great Baker
20 – Million Dollar Money Drop
29 – My Strange Addiction
2000s
2009
3 – Game Show in My Head
3 – Underdog to Wonderdog
4 – Confessions of a Teen Idol
4 – Superstars of Dance
5 – Daddy's Girls
5 – DietTribe
5 – True Beauty
7 – 13: Fear Is Real
7 – Meet the Browns
8 – Greg Behrendt's Wake Up Call
8 – Parking Wars
9 – Howie Do It
11 – Tool Academy
15 – The Beast
15 – Celebrity Rehab Presents Sober House
18 – United States of Tara
19 – Will Work for Food
21 – Lie to Me
26 – Olivia
26 – Trust Me
27 – Toddlers & Tiaras
2 – For the Love of Ray J
2 – RuPaul's Drag Race
4 – Billy the Exterminator
6 – Jockeys
8 – The CollegeHumor Show
8 – The Girls of Hedsor Hall
8 – Nitro Circus
8 – Rob Dyrdek's Fantasy Factory
8 – Sonny With a Chance
10 – How the Earth Was Made
10 – T.I.'s Road to Redemption
12 – Animal Armageddon
13 – Aaron Stone
13 – Dollhouse
15 – Eastbound & Down
17 – Dogg After Dark
24 – Dark Days in Monkey City
2 – College Life
2 – Harlem Heights
2 – Late Night with Jimmy Fallon
8 – Candy Girls
9 – Animal Cops: Phoenix
9 – Castle
10 – WCG Ultimate Gamer
11 – The Chopping Block
15 – Kings
18 – Better Off Ted
19 – Dhani Tackles the Globe
19 – Taking the Stage
20 – Party Down
21 – Ring of Honor Wrestling
23 – Roommates
23 – Table for 12
26 – In the Motherhood
30 – AMTV
31 – Cupid
6 – Surviving Suburbia
7 – Deadliest Warrior
8 – The Unusuals
9 – Kröd Mändoon and the Flaming Sword of Fire
9 – Southland
9 – Parks and Recreation
9 – Harper's Island
13 – Doing DaVinci
15 – PitchMen
16 – WWE Superstars
19 – Cake Boss
19 – The Rising Son
19 – Sit Down, Shut Up
26 – Daisy of Love
2 – Jonas L.A.
6 – Hitched or Ditched
7 – The Fashion Show
12 – The Real Housewives of New Jersey
15 – TNA Epics
19 – Glee
26 – The Little Couple
26 – Mental
27 – The Goode Family
29 – Obsessed
31 – DJ & the Fro
31 – Jesse James Is a Dead Man
1 – The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien
4 – Tosh.0
7 – Kendra
8 – Nurse Jackie
10 – Top Chef Masters
11 – 16 and Pregnant
13 – 20Q
15 – It's On with Alexa Chung
15 – Zeke and Luther
16 – Hawthorne
17 – The Othersiders
20 – BrainRush
20 – Destroy Build Destroy
21 – Make It or Break It
22 – The Best Thing I Ever Ate
23 – Bite Me with Dr. Mike
23 – NYC Prep
24 – The Philanthropist
28 – Hung
1 – Monsters Inside Me
3 – Lingerie
6 – The Great Debate
6 – Sportsnation
7 – 10 Things I Hate About You
7 – That's Impossible
7 – Warehouse 13
12 – Drop Dead Diva
14 – Miami Social
15 – Dark Blue
15 – Michael & Michael Have Issues
16 – Watch What Happens L!ve with Andy Cohen
19 – Pawn Stars
20 – Dating in the Dark
20 – The T.O. Show
21 – Ruby & The Rockits
2 – Megan Wants a Millionaire
3 – Ultimate Cake Off
5 – Giuliana and Bill
6 – Police Women of Broward County
9 – Shark Tank
16 – 2 Months 2 Million
16 – Kourtney and Khloé Take Miami
16 – My Antonio
17 – Glenn Martin, DDS
17 – Hoarders
19 – Dude, What Would Happen
20 – Models of the Runway
23 – What Would Brian Boitano Make?
24 – The Fresh Beat Band
28 – Hot Wheels Battle Force 5
1 – Surviving Disaster
8 – Melrose Place
10 – The Vampire Diaries
13 – Kung Fu Dino Posse
13 – Monsters Resurrected
14 – The Jay Leno Show
16 – MysteryQuest
17 – Archer
17 – Community
18 – The Troop
20 – Bored to Death
21 – Accidentally on Purpose
22 – The Good Wife
22 – The Forgotten
22 – NCIS: Los Angeles
23 – The Beautiful Life: TBL
23 – Cougar Town
23 – Mercy
23 – Eastwick
23 – Modern Family
24 – FlashForward
25 – Brothers
27 – The Cleveland Show
27 – Popzilla
27 – Titan Maximum
28 – Trauma
30 – Hank
30 – The Middle
2 – Stargate Universe
3 – Life on Top
3 – SuperFetch
4 – Dallas Divas & Daughters
4 – Three Rivers
5 – The Mo'Nique Show
5 – Jungle Junction
5 – Sherri
6 – Ghost Lab
7 – Secret Girlfriend
9 – I'm Alive
14 – Eddie Griffin: Going For Broke
22 – The Jeff Dunham Show
22 – Ultimate Parkour Challenge
23 – White Collar
27 – Monica: Still Standing
29 – The League
30 – Pit Bulls & Parolees
3 – V
6 – Ancients Behaving Badly
6 – Fanboy & Chum Chum
9 – Lopez Tonight
16 – Chef Academy
22 – The Haunted
23 – Find My Family
27 – I'm in the Band
28 – Big Time Rush
2 – Launch My Line
3 – BBQ Pitmasters
6 – Holly's World
7 – Men of a Certain Age
8 – Teen Mom
9 – Campus PD
12 – American Ninja Warrior
13 – The Jacksons: A Family Dynasty
14 – The Sing-Off
19 – CHRISJayify
21 – Little Chocolatiers
29 – One Big Happy Family
29 – Private Chefs of Beverly Hills
2008
8 – How Much Is Enough?
9 – Ghost Hunters International
10 – Make Me a Supermodel
11 – My Big Redneck Wedding
13 – Scott Baio Is 46...and Pregnant
13 – Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
14 – Bone Detectives
14 – Gourmet's Diary of a Foodie
20 – Breaking Bad
21 – Life After People
23 – The Moment of Truth
25 – Gone Country
28 – In Treatment
29 – The Millionaire Matchmaker
30 – UFO Hunters
31 – Eli Stone
4 – The Mr. Men Show
4 – Welcome to The Captain
7 – America's Best Dance Crew
7 – Lipstick Jungle
7 – Ni Hao, Kai-Lan
7 – Survivor: Micronesia
8 – Escape to Chimp Eden
18 – Power Rangers Jungle Fury
2 – Unhitched
4 – After the Attack
4 – New Amsterdam
4 – The Real Housewives of New York City
6 – Crime 360
9 – Ax Men
10 – Canterbury's Law
12 – Lewis Black's Root of All Evil
18 – Iron Ring
22 – Hollywood 411
29 – Dance on Sunset
31 – Bingo America
1 – Delocated
3 – Rock the Cradle
3 – Step It Up and Dance
12 – Groomer Has It
13 – ¡Viva Hollywood!
14 – Can You Duet
14 – Ego trip's Miss Rap Supreme
14 – One Way Out
14 – The Paper
15 – NOFX: Backstage Passport
16 – Under One Roof
18 – Ben 10: Alien Force
21 – Verminators
22 – A Shot at Love II with Tila Tequila
22 – Out of the Wild
26 – The Mighty B!
27 – Celebracadabra
2 – Speed Racer: The Next Generation
14 – 1000 Ways to Die
26 – Denise Richards: It's Complicated
26 – Living Lohan
1 – In Plain Sight
5 – The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack
7 – Housecat Housecall
8 – I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant
8 – Paula's Best Dishes
10 – Untamed & Uncut
16 – The Middleman
17 – Rock and Roll Acid Test
29 – Factory
1 – The Secret Life of the American Teenager
6 – I Love Money
11 – The N's Student Body
13 – Brooke Knows Best
15 – From G's to Gents
16 – Hurl!
16 – The Gong Show with Dave Attell
17 – Reality Bites Back
21 – Catch 21
21 – Food Detectives
29 – Jurassic Fight Club
2 – Ask Aida
3 – Big Daddy's House
4 – I Want to Work for Diddy
16 – The Dish
18 – MTV's Busted
21 – The Cho Show
21 – Destroyed in Seconds
21 – Tabatha's Salon Takeover
25 – America's Toughest Jobs
1 – Raising the Bar
3 – Sons of Anarchy
6 – Body Language
6 – We Mean Business
6 – Wolverine and the X-Men
7 – Hole in the Wall
7 – True Blood
7 – Weird, True & Freaky
9 – Fringe
9 – Privileged
9 – The Rachel Zoe Project
10 – Do Not Disturb
11 – MTV's Top Pop Group
20 – The Suite Life on Deck
21 – Spaceballs: The Animated Series
22 – 90210
22 – Worst Week
23 – Opportunity Knocks
23 – The Mentalist
24 – Gary Unmarried
24 – Knight Rider
27 – Gogoriki
28 – The Life & Times of Tim
28 – World's Toughest Fixes
29 – 17 Kids and Counting
3 – Star Wars: The Clone Wars
3 – The Ex List
4 – The Secret Saturdays
5 – Easy Money
5 – In Harm's Way
5 – Valentine
7 – The Real Housewives of Atlanta
8 – The Tony Rock Project
9 – Eleventh Hour
9 – Kath & Kim
9 – Life on Mars
9 – Saturday Night Live Weekend Update Thursday
10 – The Starter Wife (TV series)
11 – Dogs 101
11 – Zane's Sex Chronicles
13 – My Own Worst Enemy
14 – Iditarod: Toughest Race on Earth
15 – Chocolate News
17 – Crash
17 – Crusoe
17 – Ghost Adventures
18 – Giada at Home
18 – Hulk Hogan's Celebrity Championship Wrestling
20 – Real Chance of Love
20 – Rita Rocks
20 – Scream Queens
21 – Rookies
22 – Stylista
30 – Lost Tapes
6 – 50 Cent: The Money and the Power
7 – Whale Wars
8 – True Jackson, VP
15 – Think Like a Cat
18 – Brothers to Brutha
28 – Little Britain USA
29 – The Penguins of Madagascar
2 – Party Monsters Cabo
3 – Man v. Food
6 – Cats 101
7 – Adventure Time
7 – Leverage
8 – Children's Hospital
9 – A Double Shot at Love
16 – Momma's Boys
28 – Silent Library
29 – Bromance
29 – The City
2007
1 – Engaged and Underage
1 – High Maintenance 90210
1 – Poker After Dark
2 – Dirt
3 – The Knights of Prosperity
3 – In Case of Emergency
4 – Afro Samurai
6 – Wild World of Spike
7 – Grease: You're the One That I Want!
7 – I'm From Rolling Stone
7 – Just Jordan
8 – I Love New York
8 – Lincoln Heights
8 – The (White) Rapper Show
10 – Armed & Famous
12 – Cory in the House
15 – Kids by the Dozen
17 – Maui Fever
17 – The Naked Trucker and T-Bones Show
19 – Ms. Adventure
21 – The Dresden Files
22 – Boulevard of Broken Dreams
22 – E-Vet Interns
23 – Disney's Really Short Report
24 – Dinner: Impossible
28 – Ultimate Factories
30 – Bam's Unholy Union
30 – Wrestling Society X
31 – Top Design
1 – Juvies
1 – The Sarah Silverman Program
2 – The Erotic Traveler
3 – The Naked Brothers Band
5 – Rules of Engagement
11 – Saul of the Mole Men
20 – 100 Winners
20 – The Agency
23 – quiznation
26 – Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern
26 – The Black Donnellys
26 – Power Rangers Operation Overdrive
27 – Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?
2 – Cities of the Underworld
2 – Doctor*Ology
3 – El Tigre: The Adventures of Manny Rivera
4 – Dice: Undisputed
5 – The Land Before Time
6 – The Search for the Next Pussycat Doll
7 – The Wedding Bells
10 – Blood+
12 – The Riches
13 – American Heiress
13 – Bullrun
14 – Halfway Home
14 – Saints & Sinners
15 – Raines
15 – Road
16 – Wayside
20 – The Whitest Kids U' Know
22 – This American Life
23 – Acceptable.TV
27 – The Great American Dream Vote
1 – Sons of Hollywood
1 – The Tudors
2 – Rogue Nature
2 – The Sauce
2 – Taquita + Kaui
3 – Hilary Duff: This Is Now
5 – Adventures in Hollyhood
5 – Human Giant
7 – Short Circuits
9 – Culture Shock
10 – Jon & Kate Plus 8
10 – Scarred
11 – Shear Genius
12 – Notes from the Underbelly
13 – Painkiller Jane
15 – 24/7
15 – Charm School
15 – Drive
16 – Divine Canine
18 – Head Case
24 – Rad Girls
7 – ESPN First Take
12 – My Friends Tigger & Pooh
13 – The Drinky Crow Show
13 – Fat Guy Stuck in Internet
13 – Superjail!
18 – National Bingo Night
19 – Reality Racing
25 – Storm Hawks
28 – Sunset Tan
29 – The Universe
30 – Hidden Palms
30 – The Next Best Thing
30 – Traveler
31 – Pirate Master
31 – The Starter Wife (Miniseries)
– The Academy
1 – Demons
2 – Equitrekking
3 – Army Wives
6 – Destination Truth
6 – Passport to Latin America
6 – Tyler Perry's House of Payne
6 – The X Effect
10 – John from Cincinnati
13 – Lil' Bush
16 – Confessions of a Matchmaker
16 – Giada in Paradise
17 – Cape Wrath
17 – Flight of the Conchords
17 – Ice Road Truckers
18 – The 5ive
18 – Age of Love
18 – Heartland
24 – Friday: The Animated Series
26 – Shaq's Big Challenge
28 – Burn Notice
28 – Hey Paula
29 – The Best Years
2 – Camouflage
8 – American Body Shop
9 – Greek
9 – Take the Cake
10 – Baldwin Hills
11 – Code Monkeys
12 – General Hospital: Night Shift
13 – A Model Life
15 – Rock of Love with Bret Michaels
15 – Scott Baio Is 45...and Single
15 – Side Order of Life
16 – Chelsea Lately
17 – The Bill Engvall Show
17 – Room 401
18 – America's Next Producer
19 – Mad Men
20 – Human Weapon
22 – The Kill Point
22 – Private Sessions
23 – Saving Grace
24 – Damages
25 – Diagnosis X
26 – I Hate My 30's
29 – The Two Coreys
31 – Flipping Out
31 – Murder
4 – Grand Slam
5 – Kimora: Life in the Fab Lane
6 – Mission Man Band
6 – The Pickup Artist
7 – LA Ink
10 – Flash Gordon
13 – Californication
13 – Newport Harbor: The Real Orange County
13 – Slacker Cats
17 – Phineas and Ferb
20 – Yo Gabba Gabba!
22 – Anchorwoman
27 – Life of Ryan
30 – Celebrity Rap Superstar
31 – Back at the Barnyard
3 – Super Why!
3 – WordWorld
4 – Jail
4 – Put Up Your Dukes
6 – Tim Gunn's Guide to Style
8 – iCarly
9 – Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil
10 – Tell Me You Love Me
10 – The Steve Wilkos Show
14 – Nashville
14 – Out of Jimmy's Head
17 – K-Ville
19 – Gossip Girl
19 – MANswers
19 – Back to You
19 – Kid Nation
19 – Kitchen Nightmares
23 – CW Now
23 – Online Nation
24 – Journeyman
24 – The Big Bang Theory
24 – Chuck
25 – Reaper
25 – Cane
26 – Bionic Woman
26 – Life
26 – Private Practice
26 – Dirty Sexy Money
27 – Big Shots
28 – Moonlight
29 – Back at the Barnyard
1 – Aliens in America
1 – Celebrity Exposé
1 – Control Room Presents
1 – Dr. Steve-O
2 – Cavemen
2 – Carpoolers
2 – Sunday Best
3 – Pushing Daisies
5 – About a Girl
7 – America's Most Smartest Model
7 – Life Is Wild
9 – A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila
11 – Street Customs
12 – Say Yes to the Dress
12 – Women's Murder Club
12 – Wizards of Waverly Place
13 – The Future Is Wild
13 – The Search for the Next Elvira
14 – Keeping Up with the Kardashians
15 – Samantha Who?
15 – The Salt-N-Pepa Show
16 – E:60
17 – Storm Chasers
18 – Viva Laughlin
19 – The Next Great American Band
22 – Kaya
24 – Phenomenon
31 – MonsterQuest
1 – Gangland
2 – Chowder
2 – Co-Ed Confidential
2 – Orangutan Island
4 – Xavier: Renegade Angel
7 – Trapped
9 – CMT Invitation Only
9 – Talking Metal on Fuse
10 – Trick My Trucker
11 – Fearless Planet
20 – Frank TV
30 – Shockwave
7 – The A-list
9 – Snoop Dogg's Father Hood
16 – Psychic Kids
26 – Transformers: Animated
27 – Some Assembly Required
28 – Fight Quest
2006
1 – Flavor of Love
1 – High Stakes Poker
1 – In Justice
2 – Rollergirls
4 – South Beach
4 – There & Back
5 – Four Kings
6 – The Book of Daniel
6 – Dallas SWAT
6 – Hotel Erotica Cabo
7 – MuscleCar
8 – Campus Ladies
9 – There & Back
11 – Ham on the Street
12 – Crumbs
13 – Web Junk 20
15 – Full Force Nature
17 – King of Vegas
17 – Love Monkey
18 – Skating with Celebrities
22 – Number 1 Single
23 – Courting Alex
27 – The Emperor's New School
3 – Trick My Truck
7 – Get This Party Started
25 – Kappa Mikey
1 – Free Ride
2 – The Shop
3 – Conviction
4 – Little People, Big World
4 – Wonder Pets
6 – Pros vs. Joes
6 – Top Chef
7 – 8th & Ocean
7 – Sons & Daughters
7 – The Unit
8 – Black. White.
12 – Big Love
12 – Cheerleader Nation
13 – The New Adventures of Old Christine
15 – The Loop
15 – American Idol Extra
16 – American Inventor
17 – Modern Men
21 – The Real Housewives of Orange County
22 – The Evidence
22 – Heist
22 – Unan1mous
24 – Hannah Montana
27 – The Daily 10
28 – Teachers
28 – Thief
29 – The Bedford Diaries
31 – Survival of the Richest
2 – So NoTORIous
3 – Call to Greatness
3 – Yo Momma
4 – Bonds on Bonds
4 – King of Cars
4 – Pepper Dennis
6 – PlayMania
7 – Can't Get a Date
9 – Just for Kicks
10 – Shalom in the Home
15 – Eureka Seven
16 – What About Brian
17 – I've Got a Secret
18 – Mega Movers
18 – Pants-Off Dance-Off
19 – Future Weapons
21 – The Chelsea Handler Show
5 – Mickey Mouse Clubhouse
7 – Disorderly Conduct: Video on Patrol
21 – Supergroup
23 – Mega Disasters
29 – Fetch! with Ruff Ruffman
29 – Solitary
31 – The Hills
2 – Beyond the Break
5 – World Series of Blackjack
6 – The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency
7 – Dog Bites Man
8 – Windfall
9 – Where My Dogs At?
11 – Lucky Louie
12 – Saved
13 – ECW on Sci Fi
16 – Million Dollar Listing
17 – Spider Riders
18 – Treasure Hunters
21 – America's Got Talent
21 – Tyler Perry's House of Payne
22 – Country Fried Home Videos
26 – Kyle XY
28 – Blade: The Series
29 – American Eats
6 – Raising the Roofs
7 – Dog Bites Man
7 – Psych
7 – The Ultimate Coyote Ugly Search
9 – Brotherhood
10 – Caught in the Moment
12 – Keyshia Cole: The Way It Is
12 – WWE Madison Square Garden Classics
13 – Most Evil
14 – Squirrel Boy
16 – Angela's Eyes
17 – Driving Force
17 – Final Fu
18 – Eureka
19 – Miami Ink
19 – Work Out
27 – Who Wants to Be a Superhero?
28 – The Replacements
31 – One Ocean View
1 – Tabloid Wars
6 – Metalocalypse
6 – Three Moons Over Milford
7 – Gene Simmons Family Jewels
11 – CMT Cross Country
17 – Ace of Cakes
21 – Vanished
26 – Yin Yang Yo!
28 – Wow! Wow! Wubbzy!
30 – Justice
31 – The Fantasy Show
2 – Fantastic Four: World's Greatest Heroes
2 – Saturday Night Football
4 – Curious George
4 – World Blackjack Tour
5 – Standoff
5 – Desire
5 – Fashion House
7 – Happy Hour
7 – 'Til Death
7 – Whacked Out Sports
1 note
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Vaping Duckie’s Rantings and Ravings, Issue #1
WHAT'S IN THE NEWS, DUCKIE?!
BILL S-5 IN CANADA
What will Bill S-5 do?
Make it illegal for vape shops to truthfully tell customers that vaping is less harmful than combustible cigarettes
Allow Health Canada to regulate products in the future as it chooses — and this has already begun. The agency has announced that all vaping products that contain nicotine must have child-resistant caps, including tanks [see below]
Eliminate many popular flavors by preventing manufacturers from honestly describing them. It bans flavor descriptions that indicate candy, dessert, and soft drink flavors, for example — and Health Canada will be free to amend the list at any time
Probably lead to American tobacco companies moving in and taking over the bulk of the vaping market in Canada. Cigarette companies have the money, regulatory knowledge, and distribution power to overwhelm a small market (or a large one, for that matter!)
Violate constitutional rights. Bill S-5 has been criticized by legal experts like the Canadian Constitution Foundation for violating constitutional rights of Canadian citizens
The bill’s purposes are stated clearly:
To protect young persons and non-users of tobacco products from inducements to use vaping products;
To protect the health of young persons and non-users of tobacco products from exposure to and dependence on nicotine that could result from the use of vaping products;
To protect the health of young persons by restricting access to vaping products;
To prevent the public from being deceived or misled with respect to the health hazards of using vaping products; and
To enhance public awareness of those hazards.
This is supposed to protect Kids, a lot like what Congress is trying to do in the US.
It's currently in the second reading in the house of commons in Canada.
Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer has singled out the Juul Pod system as particularly dangerous, More so than ACTUAL SMOKING. He is saying that ONE Juul pod has as much Nicotine as a FULL PACK OF CIGARETTES. That's insane. The amount of nicotine that is in the pod depends SOLELY on the amount of nicotine the person using said device uses. For me personally, It's between 1 and 4mg depending on my mood. Before this, Sen. Schumer went after batteries, stating “Despite the explosions, no recalls have been issued.” What the Senator failed to realize or find through simple research was that the majority of "Vape Explosions" are a result of "User Error", such as having loose batteries in one's pockets with loose change or keys or improper charging. We in the vaping community have someone who stays on top of battery safety and always has up to date specs and warnings for any battery used for vaping. Check out Battery Mooch for more about batteries.
Johnson's Creek E-Liquid Company has gone out of business, and this is very sad news for the Vaping Industry as a whole. Johnson's Creek was the first E-Liquid producer established in the states, and between Direct to Consumer sales, Wholesale Bulk E-Liquid, and Distro to brick-and-mortar shops, at one point they were the second largest E-Liquid manufacturer in the world.
WHY DID THEY GO OUT OF BUSINESS, DUCKIE?!
Well, The CEO stated earlier in the year they had major concerns aurrounding the Deeming Regulations being proposed by the Food and Drug Administration, sating that it could and likely WOULD put them out of business. The Regs state that each application, which cost $1 million, The company would have to pay $200 million if it submitted an application for every flavour that they made. The Village of Hartland agreed to step in and help by urging the FDA to rethink the regulations, but ultimately to no Avail.
Hartland Village Administrator David Cox said that while he believes that the prospect of the costly looming regulations did play a role in the company’s demise, a business deal gone wrong with tobacco and cigarette papers distributor Republic Tobacco, is what sealed their fate.
the CEO posted to twitter on Oct. 9 "Very sad to announce we are going out of business effective tomorrow", and sin a statement on their website they added: Johnson Creek will no longer be in business. I’m so very sorry that we’ve failed you.”
Heidi Braun, CEO, Johnson Creek
You didn't fail us, Heidi.
So the Altria group is being forced to run Advertisements against Smoking. For those who don't know, the Altria group is the company that owns brands such as Phillip Morris, RJ Reynolds and Lorillard. This is the group that gives us Newport and Marlboro, basically.
In the court case which was initiated almost 20 years ago, the big tobacco companies were accused of releasing misleading adverts and implicated for the false health claims they made about cigarettes in the past.
The TV segments will be between 30 and 45 seconds long and will feature mostly on ABC, CBS and NBC for five days a week. The adverts will run for a total of 52 weeks, and will display court-mandated text accompanied by a voice narration.
“Altria, R.J. Reynolds Tobacco, Lorillard, and Philip Morris USA intentionally designed cigarettes to make them more addictive,” will say one of the adverts, whilst another one will read : “More people die every year from smoking than from murder, AIDS, suicide, drugs, car crashes, and alcohol, combined.”
I'm not sure how effective these ads will be as Television is no longer the number one source of entertainment in the world, but I'm glad to see SOME action has been taken to make these companies own up to their mistakes.
now on to something a little less dour.
DUCKIE!! WHATCHU VAPIN' ON?
Recently, I've been vaping on the Smok Alien 220 mod, and switching between both the Smok TFV8 Cloud Beast and a generic mini Velocity RDA I got from My friend Mitch. I was vaping on the iPV5, but it's having some form of issue due to juice leaking into it. I AM a notorious over-dripper.
I also from time to time like to use my JAXBOX in single 18650 mode with my Cloud Champ RDA on it. It's fun for a little nostalgia.
HEY DUCKIE, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN, BRO?
Well.. That's a long answer. Let's see, I left off with Zamplebox unboxings and reviews. Well, I ran out of things to review and had an issue with Zamplebox where my box was over a month late, then I got the wrong box, then got my box AFTER getting the box for the next month, which was ALSO late. After that, I ended my membership. I then ran out of things to review, and then we were evicted from our house, and had to move. I briefly worked at STR8 VAPES in Ennis, and loved the hell out of that, and then we moved to a completely different town. My other job, being a rapper and producer(go figger, right?) started to take off and I focused on that, but now I'm back here with you guys. Insofar as Juice goes, I've been making my own, and I'm going to show you guys that.
WHAT DO YOU HAVE PLANNED FOR US THESE DAYS DUCKIE?
Well, obviously, I plan on vlogging, and writing these little editorial rants. I'm still going to review stuff(I'm in the process of researching the first review back) and I'll show you guys stuff insofar as Juice and such goes. It's gonna be fun!
I firmly plan on youtubing again, and making sure that you guys will have access to it here on Tumblr. @Sweetmal25 told me that I should. I believe her. I don’t have a choice, She's my wife.
To conclude this, Let's find a way to help our Canadian brethren and fellow Vapers. I know we have an uphill battle here in the US to contend with, but we can't stand by and let our fellow Vaper lose their vaping. It's not something I'm willing to stand for. I'm gonna look into some stuff and find any sort of campaigns to help, and when I do they'll be posted here on my tumblr.
Also, Pour one out for Johnson Creek. they will be missed. One of the first bottles of E-liquid I ever had was from them. It was a cookie flavour of some kind, if I remember right, and it was delicious.
Our Elected Officials have no idea what they're talking about insofar as vaping goes, and are trying to ban vaping in an effort to "Protect the Children". While a noble cause, this is a very thin veil that we can all see through, and know where it’s really coming from.
I AM BACK, and plan on a lot more content and DIFFERENT content than before while maintaining the older stuff.
@Sweetmal25 is my favourite person, and I'm not just saying that because ring.
I'll see you all in the next video and my next Ranting and Raving.
LET'S KEEP ON VAPING STRONG! QUACK QUACK!
TVD/The Vaping Duckie
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US, John Calipari overwhelmed by Canada's RJ Barrett in semifinals of FIBA U19 World Cup - Sporting News
Sporting News
US, John Calipari overwhelmed by Canada's RJ Barrett in semifinals of FIBA U19 World Cup
Sporting News
July 8, 2017 5:05pm EDT July 8, 2017 5:05pm EDT The Americans were beaten by a team filled with players who play on the AAU circuit, who compete at U.S. high schools, and who relied largely on the brilliance of a single individual player.
Austin Wiley, Team USA fall to Canada in FIBA U19 World Cup semifinalsAL.com
No gold medal for John Calipari's United States U19 after loss to CanadaThe Courier-Journal
RJ Barrett stars as Canada shocks Team USA in FIBA U19 semisYahoo Sports
Lexington Herald Leader -WKYT -Addicted to Quack -UConn Huskies
all 110 news articles »
Read more at http://ift.tt/2tBAbL0
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Buster's Mal Heart
The story of a man split in two.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt5173032/
Official website:
http://bustersmalheart.com
Follow on twitter:
https://twitter.com/BustersMalFilm
Follow on instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/bustersmalheart
Follow on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/BustersMalHeart
Follow on facebook:https://www.facebook.com/BustersMalHeart
BUSTER'S MAL HEART (2017) Official Trailer | Rami MalekWell Go USA Entertainment https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxKOMAfZjgM
Starring:Jonah.........................................................RAMI MALEK The Last Free Man......................................DJ QUALLS Marty....................................................KATE LYN SHEIL Roxy..........................................SUKHA BELLE POTTER Deputy Winston.........................................TOBY HUSS Pauline..........................................................LIN SHAYE Oscar..........................................................MARK KELLY Ranger Meg...........................................BRUCE BUNDY Adelita...............................................TERESA YENQUE Dale......................................................JARED LARSON Mrs. Bowry...........................SANDRA ELLIS LAFFERTY Mr. Bowry........................................NICHOLAS PRYOR Ryan...............................................................RJ BURNS Bill Western.......................................GABRIEL CLARK Morning Shift Concierge.................LILY GLADSTONE Detective...............................................CHRIS TORMA Local Newscaster..............................SHI NE NIELSON
Ophthalmologist..............................RICKY HARTUNG Mormon Bishop.............................TOM CORDINGLEY Quack Scientist........................DR. FRANKLIN RUEHL Radio DJ Voice 1.................................NICK KNUDSEN Radio DJ Voice 2..............................GREG BEHRENDT “Cat”...................................................................PICKLE Phone Sex Operator.............................KATE BERLANT Rude Guest........................................DIANA DAMRON Subdued Preacher....................CHRISTOPHER KRIESA Evangelical Preacher..........................MICHAEL CLINE Network Newscaster.....................KIMBERLY ARLAND Kathy Rose...................................JENNY LEONHARDT Maria Cueyatl..............................RUTH ZALDUONDO Psychic Commercial Voice..........JENNIFER LAFLEUR Public Access Psychic......................SANDRA SEACAT Psychic Caller...................................ROSS PARTRIDGE Ranger Joe........................................WALTER DALTON
Written and Directed by SARAH ADINA SMITH Produced by JONAKO DONLEY Produced by TRAVIS STEVENSExecutive Producer MYNETTE LOUIE Executive Producers JULIE PARKER BENELLO, DAN COGAN, GERALYN DREYFOUS, WENDY ETTINGER Executive Producer SAMUEL T. BAUERCo-Executive Producers ERIKA KELTON REGINA K. SCULLY, LESLEY ANN SKILLEN
SYNOPSISIn this bold thriller peppered with dark humor and interlocking mystery, an eccentric mountain man is on the run from the authorities, surviving the winter by breaking into empty vacation homes in a remote community. Regularly calling into radio talk shows — where he has acquired the nickname “Buster” — to rant about the impending Inversion at the turn of the millennium, he is haunted by visions of being lost at sea, and memories of his former life as a family man.Buster (Rami Malek, MR. ROBOT) was once Jonah, a hard-working husband and father whose job as the night-shift concierge at a hotel took its toll on his psyche and, consequently, his marriage to the sensitive Marty (Kate Lyn Sheil) — until a chance encounter with a conspiracy-obsessed drifter (DJ Qualls) changed the course of their lives forever. As the solitary present-day Buster drifts from house to house, eluding the local sheriff at every turn, we gradually piece together the events that fractured his life and left him alone on top of a snowy mountain, or perhaps in a small rowboat in the middle of a vast ocean — or both, in this visceral mind bender that will provoke discussion long after it turns your world upside-down.
(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxKOMAfZjgM)
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The Best of D&D, Round Two
Ladiiiiiiiies and gentlemeeeeeeen! The votes for Round One are IN, and the finalists are posted below! Once again, there will be a survey to narrow down the potentials, and then it’s on to Round Three!
My only fear is that y’all will get bored of even the best quotes by then. Hopefully not...
Once again, the survey is at the end of the post!
Overheard During D&D Other RPGs/3.5e
Describing a character:
SO: “She is built like a brick shithouse.”
DM: “She shits brick houses.”
Bubbles: “She makes brick houses shit bricks.”
Rogue equipment:
KB (IC): “I need [boots] that are…soft-sounding.”
MM (IC): “We have socks.”
Proper procedure when everything goes to hell:
RD: “[Cleric] goes outside and makes a magic circle, sits in it, and cries.”
During Hackmaster, about a bottle label:
SB: “It says ‘Thou shalt not question the DM over inane shit!’”
KH (IC): “That stupid fucking son of a flea-ridden bitch cunt wizard - ”
MM (IC): “Oh, him.”
IO: “[Wizard] is going to say - ”
KB: “Can I tell you why this is a bad idea?”
IO: “No.”
Calling for divine help in very specific situations:
MM: “Please state your current medical emergency.”
KB: “Head-splosion.”
SO: “If you have been stabbed, press one. If you are currently being stabbed, press two.”
MM: “If your head’s detonated and you’ve launched into a wall, press three.”
RD: “Why did you press three? We never expected anyone to press three!”
SO: “We don’t know what to do in this medical emergency! Please dial again!”
Overheard During D&D 4e
Taunting the kraken:
Player: “Your tentacles are so short even an anime girl wouldn’t take 'em!”
What we think we saw - again?:
Player: “If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and weighs the same as a duck, it must be a witch.”
KH: “It’s a witch.”
RJ: “Build a bridge out of ‘er!”
Mass undead murder:
Player: “We made a ghoul-ash. An evil gumbo, really.”
SB: “Eventually you end up at the most popular stall in the market.”
Player: “Porn?”
Questioning the legitimacy of an NPC:
SB (IC as Priest): “I have a degree in polytheism from the University of Phoenix Online!”
Healing needed:
Player: “I have a mess kit, will that help?”
WS: “Only if you want to make a mess.”
Killing the undead:
SB: “Congratulations, you choked something to death that doesn’t breathe.”
Player: “Thank God I decided to engage the dragon in melee.”
MW: “You’ll never hear that in any other D&D campaign ever again.”
Captain: “Neverwinter ho!”
Dwarf: “Hos? Where?”
Interesting kills:
SB: “You decapitated him with a bludgeoning weapon.”
Overheard During D&D 5e
Spell modifications for humourous purposes:
MR: “Using a Dex[terity] save for Zone of Truth means they’re literally dodging the question.”
Demonic insight:
KH: “I say in Infernal, ‘Peace! We mean you no harm!’”
JI: “There’s no word in Infernal for ‘peace.’”
Retroactive Edit: Demons actually speak Abyssal. Devils speak Infernal.
About a previous edition of D&D:
KH: “[What] the hell couldn’t you do in 3.5?”
SW: “Win.”
What to do with windmills:
KH: “If we had a lance, we could go tilting.”
MR: “Cavalier idea.”
After a petrifying encounter with some basilisks:
BC: “I always thought she was stone-hearted.”
KT: “I dunno, I thought she rocked.”
JS: “I am going to kill all of you.”
Switching to melee for a change:
CD: “Let’s see if this ‘offense’ thing you do all the time really works.” (rolls a critical hit)
Identifying mysterious cults:
KH: “What’s the Cult of Howling Hatred?”
EC: “The Westboro Baptist Church, obviously.”
EC (IC): “So what you’re saying is that it’s very dangerous and we shouldn’t go in. I’ll take point.”
Scrying like bad cell reception:
KH: “Switch to AD&D.”
JB: “Can you scry me now?”
MGW: “You were doing so well until everybody died.”
JF: “D&D in a summary.”
Wisdom for stealing magic items:
KC: “Anything that glows goes.”
To a half-orc and Sir Bearington, regarding weirdness:
MGW (IC): “…but for me to assume you’re in a loving relationship with a talking bear is where we draw the line?!”
More on the seduction roll:
Bubbles: “Try to convince her to come with us. The way she came with you last night.”
Annoying Teen: (about his character) “Would he still hate me?”
AD: (not about his character) “I think everyone hates you.”
Old adages:
MR: “No plan survives contact with the enemy.” (IC) “But then, no enemy has survived contact with us!” (OOC) “Was that quote-worthy?”
KH: “Yes.”
About cultists:
DM (IC): “They are water people. Maybe they’re just going with the flow.”
About going forward:
KH: “Against our better judgment.”
DM: “What better judgment?”
KH: “Good point.”
About flirting with an efreet:
JI: “Below her waist is a trailing cloud of black smoke, so you’re not getting anything.”
Worst-laid plans:
KH (IC): “I have a very bad feeling about this.”
MR (IC): “You should.”
Zombies aren’t too smart:
BC (IC): “Bobs, attack the closest gnoll!”
Bobs: (run at gnoll party member)
KH (OOC): “Et tu, Bob?”
JS (OOC): “If this doesn’t belong in your blog, I dunno what does.”
Other RPGs/3.5e MVP Nominations So Far
SB, SO, MM, KH, Bubbles, RD, IO
4e MVP Nominations So Far
SB (x3), “If it looks like a duck...”, WS, RJ
5e MVP Nominations So Far
JI, KH (x2), MGW (x2), MR (x3), JB (x4), KC, EC, Bubbles, ST, AD, RD, MGW
TAKE THE SURVEY!
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