Fourth times the charm. Making sourdough might be easy for most but trying to make this with disabilities means adapting to a different way of doing things.
I simply can’t knead bread anymore, it’s beyond my dexterity now as my joints continue to be affected by this condition (EDS for the curious). All the recipe I had been trying to do were for stretch and fold, then shaping. I tried to adapt to them but simply wasn’t finding success.
That was until I found a standmixer recipe. The first one I tried was half stand mixer half traditional. So I figured I’d merge the first and second parts into one stand mixer recipe. By this point I was on my third loaf, suffice to say third time was not the charm. It was another pancake.
Then finally I found a loaf made entirely with the stand mixer with minimal shaping before bulk fermentation. The shaping was also done with a tool.
I followed this new method and it worked the first time. I wish I’d found this method sooner!
My recipe was 350g of room temperature filtered water, 100g of rye sourdough starter (fed the night before), 525g of wholemeal bread flour (Dove’s Farm) and 10g of Himalayan salt.
I used a standard paddle for the initial mix then the dough hook for gluten development (what would normally be the stretch and fold part of the process). In the end I had it on for 15/20 minutes. I then proofed it in a proofing basket (Brod and Taylor) for about four and a half hours then transplanted it to a banneton basket to bulk ferment overnight in the fridge.
In the morning I warmed up the oven for 30 minutes on 230°C before adding the loaf to a bread oven. I scored the loaf beforehand and cooked the first half for 25 minutes before removing the lid and cooking for a further 20 minutes. The picture you see is what it looked like after the second half of cooking was complete. Perfect blistering and nice ear.
What I would different is proof it less. It was nearly triple the size when I took it out before bulk fermentation and I think that over proofed it. So I will tweak it a little the next time I do this.
The best part is I didn’t need to do too much. Most of the work is actually the maintenance of the starter. The bread making part with the stand mixer was the easiest in the end, once I got that part right and stopped trying to do a loaf like able bodied people do.
My goal is to make a 100% spelt loaf with a spelt starter. I will wait until I’m a little more seasoned before attempting that though.
Very happy with how this loaf turned out.
As an aside I used rice flour to prevent the loaf from sticking to the bread basket. This worked a charm. I have learnt so much through this process (plus hours of watching YouTube videos) and built my confidence up. It also helps me feel a little bit more independent which is so valuable when you have disabilities.
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Alastor Realizes He Has Feelings For You
Alastor x GN!Reader
AN: A lovely anon sent in a request for a few of the guys realizing they have feelings for the reader, and Alastor's got...so far away from me that I decided to give him his own post, and I'll link this in the ask I actually answer. I just had so much fun writing Alastor freaking the hell out once he realizes.
HERE is the link for the ask if anyone is curious to see this prompt with Lucifer or Vox.
Alastor
In order of which of the guys notices first, Alastor realizes it dead last.
Which makes sense. He had long thought himself incapable of such feelings toward someone. There had never been anyone he had felt that particular inclination towards before, so he assumes at first that what he has with you is just…a very intense friendship, almost like him and Rosie, just with some odd caveats.
Once he does realize he'll immediately go to Rosie for some advice since it's…clearly not his area of expertise.
He doesn't even notice it, someone else points it out to him.
He's in a piss poor mood as he goes about the hotel. He hasn't yet figured out it's because you've been too busy to see him for the past four days.
Until someone gets mad enough at him to talk back.
Alastor is sitting in the lobby, impatiently tapping his foot as he wallows and waits, sipping a glass of rye as Husk made a point to only come over to his side of the bar when it looked like he needed something.
Alastor was struggling, trying to figure out why his mood has been so sour these past few days. Things had been fine, delightful even! The hotel was taken care of, his broadcasts went well, why he even went for a nice stroll in Cannibal Town to visit Rosie. By all means a perfect few days.
So why was his patience for everything wearing oh so thin? He sighs a moment and makes a sound almost like a growl to himself as he tries to puzzle this out. This was so infuriatingly perplexing!
It isn't much longer until Angel Dust is so fed up with Alastor ruining the good mood of the bar as he tries to flirt with Husk that he actually addresses the Overlord.
“Look Smiles. Just because you're all sad ya lovely little lover has been too busy to even say hi the past few days, doesn't mean you've gotta take it out on us. I'm trying to hit on the barman but your pissy mood is killing it.” Angel says, throwing a hand up from the other side of the bar.
“Operative word here being try, not succeeding at.” Husk says dryly, closer to Angel’s side.
“Yeah yeah. You secretly adore me. Don't worry. I'll keep your secret.” Angel winks at him as Alastor tries to decipher what it is Angel just said.
“...Lover?” He asks, trying to clarify, tilting his head to the side. He's so flummoxed he even stops tapping his foot. He says it like someone sounding out a foreign word for the first time.
“...Are they not your lover?” Angel raises an eyebrow, putting his drink down a moment. “I mean the way you two act…I thought you were dating and just keeping it a secret.” Angel shrugs, and only then does it click Angel is talking about you. There's no one else in the hotel that he's consistently friendly enough with that that mistake could happen.
Once he figures it out he just cackles a moment, deep and loud, with his free hand over his stomach as he fails to contain his amusement.
“Oh my dear Angel, no!” He says, chuckling a little more before continuing, shaking his head. “They're just a very dear friend.” Alastor explains, waving off the idea. “Besides why would I be upset they haven't been around? I don't see Rosie every day and I'm perfectly fine.” He says, although he doesn't really need to explain himself to them anyway.
But it doesn't seem to convince Angel who just looks at him with skepticism.
“Surely you jest! What evidence have I possibly given to suggest they are more than a dear friend?” Alastor asks, sure Angel has nothing concrete.
“Well, for starters, they can touch you whenever and however they want. You let them in your personal bubble and you fucking hate people being in your personal bubble.” Angel begins to explain, holding a finger up.
“I'm the same way with Rosie, and Mimzy, to a degree.” Alastor shoots down that theory easily.
“You've been in an increasingly shit mood with a short fuse since they've been too busy to see you.” Angel tries again, holding up a second finger.
“Preposterous. I don't know why I'm in such a frustrated mood, but I assure you it isn't them. Perhaps I'm feeling a bit of cabin fever and need to spend more time out and about in the city…?” The last bit is mostly Alastor's own suggestion to himself. "Perhaps too much time in the hotel..?" He continues wondering aloud.
Angel just rolls his eyes and sighs, rubbing his forehead with a free hand a moment.
“You get them presents! And do things for them without ever asking for a deal!” Angel tries again, holding up a third finger, but Alastor just shakes his head.
“I won't deny I do that, but I fail to see the connection between that behavior and them supposedly being my lover.” Alastor shakes his head, finding Angel's arguments far too easy to poke holes into.
Angel thinks he's about to scream with how absolutely daft this guy was in regards to his emotions apparently.
“You let them in your radio station, even when you're broadcasting, have picnics in your freaky weird swamp thing in your room, smile so much brighter as soon as you catch sight of them! You obviously have a big fat crush on them!” Angel almost shouts, standing and throwing all four arms up in absolute and utter exasperation.
"Am I fucking crazy or what? I can't be the only one who sees this?!" Angel sighs heavily as he turns to Husk who shakes his head.
"I'm not getting involved in this." Is all Husk says, although he stays close to Angel, as if to protect him should something go wrong.
“...None of that is something you would only do with a lover and not a friend.” Is all Alastor says through his smile. Not a denial of any of those actions, he has done all of those things. But he still thinks Angel is jumping to some rather far fetched conclusions.
Husk just knows Angel is right, but knows there's no way of convincing the guy unless it hits him right in the face, and Husk knows something you feel over a crush that you don't with a friend.
Jealousy.
“I don't even know why you're bothering trying to set them up Angel. They already have a hot date this weekend anyway so what does it matter if he has a crush on them or not?” Husk says so casually, it comes across like it could only be true. He curses at himself in his head for saying he wouldn't get involved and then immediately doing so before Angel Dust could upset Alastor.
There's a loud pop of static that sounds off from Alastor's direction, and Husk thinks he's right on the edge of making him realize.
“No kiddin’? Man. That blows Smiles. Sorry.” Angel blinks, slumping a bit before sitting back down and drinking. “Huh. I wonder if that's why they asked me for outfit advice the other day? Said they really wanted to wow someone.” Angel taps his glass as he thinks, having absolutely no idea if Husk is lying, but playing along anyway.
“How’d they ask them out anyway?” Angel asks curiously, because if it's true he does want to know, and if it isn't he's sure the answer will rile Alastor up anyway.
“Some newbie sinner approached them while they were grabbing a snack from that bakery they like, and said something about having a crush on them and asked them out to some jazz show or something, I don't remember. They seemed pretty excited.” Husk says as he refills Angel's drink now. However Alastor's drink just shatters in his hand at this information and he just looks down in surprise.
He hadn't been holding it that tight, had he? He looks equally confused and irritated at the mess of glass and rye on the bar top and in his hands. But why was he upset? He was never upset whenever Rosie got a new husband. He couldn't actually be jealous could he? Just the very idea makes him want to scoff. He doesn't get jelaous. But the image of you on some date with some pathetic unworthy creature as you laughed at their jokes and leaned in closer, hand gently on their arm as you pressed your lips against thei-
He's standing up, letting out a deep breath to calm himself, clearly upset as he let his thoughts run away from him. He turns to look at the two there and sees them looking quite scared, and covering their ears. Oh. His static was exceptionally loud right now, wasn't it? He quickly fixes that and adjusts his jacket with tight hands. He doesn't even bother to think of an excuse as he melts into the shadows, appearing in the bog in his room, pacing rapidly.
“Surely…not?” He asks himself aloud as he paces amongst the trees, allowing himself to feel the full panic and upset now that he was behind closed doors. He's rubbing his chin as he thinks, trying to logically figure this out.
“Why do I care if they date someone?” He asks himself, gripping his head as if it hurts from trying to figure out this riddle. He thinks his head actually is starting to hurt, since the answer was beginning to dawn on him, and it was terrifyingly uncharted territory. “No, no. Impossible. I'm confused. Perhaps I'm ill?” He suggests, taking his hands down, bringing one hand up to feel his forehead.
“....That excuse sounds absolutely pathetic.” He grits out, fist swinging and demolishing a tree in his way. But it doesn't make him feel any better. Doesn't make him feel any more in control. The more he thinks about it the more he realizes that on the surface, his interactions with you and Rosie are a little different.
When he gets Rosie presents it's just a simple “Here you are dear! I thought of you!” And then they share a laugh as she thanks him. But when he gives you a present, he waits eagerly, eyes scrutinizing every aspect of your being as you open it. His posture is stiff but practiced as he awaits your reaction, only relaxing when he sees the ecstatic smile on your face as you begin to thank him.
He doesn't mind Rosie touching him, and in fact on some days actually quite enjoys it. But with you he wants it, moves instinctively towards your touch instead of away.
Fuck. That stupid spider was right, he realized with a swell of panic and fear at this new unknown variable.
He…loves you? It still didn't sound right, but the more he thought about it the more he realizes it could only unfortunately be true. When had you wrapped him around your little finger so tightly? And how hadn't he realized?!
He's even more upset now at how far gone he was on you without realizing. The radio demon has a weakness. Even just thinking the phrase makes the sensation of bile rise in his throat and he has to sit down a moment to collect himself again.
His entire body is stiff and agitated as he tries to come to terms with this. Until he hears a knock on his door.
“Alastor? Are you in there? It's me. Husk said you seemed like you were in a sour mood. So I thought I would come check on you. Can I come in?” Your voice rings through the door crystal clear and he sucks in a breath and pays attention to his reactions now.
His stiff muscles began to relax and soften, the frustration that was so unbearable he had begun tearing apart trees seemed so…distant now. Surely an over exaggeration to lose his cool like that. He sighs and looks down.
Angel had been right.
But…now that he knows…all he needs to do now is get you wrapped just as tightly around his finger as he was around yours. There is no danger of feeling jealousy or rejection or heartbreak or of him possibly being controlled by you or anything of the sort if he ensures you fall for him as splendidly as he has apparently fallen for you.
With that in mind he stands now, ready to face you with this new knowledge. He's dusting himself off and then opening his door, smiling at you in the typically charming way he knows had a tendency to make people swoon when he was alive, and even now in death. Just because he hadn't had an interest in dating didn't mean he didn't know how to charm someone.
“How kind to come check on me.” He drawls almost sweetly as he snatches your hand as gently as possible before bringing it to his lips, eyes half-lidded as he peers at you, studying your expression. He feels confident from the sound of the slight intake of your breath and the small flush of red dusting your cheeks that he very well still has a chance to edge out any competition for your affections.
“Well now my dear I'm in a much less sour mood now that I have such exquisite company. If you're not too tired I would love to know what's captured your time so much these past few days. Come on in.” His smile is charming, a predator seeming to eye his unaware prey as he opens the door further to let you in, your eager smile mollifying him for the moment.
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