#s2 hurry up so i can see her again and treasure her before i have to experience shibuya again

[leafspiritz]

happy bday nobara 🌹

[dathen]

Okay I have some complicated thoughts following Melanie’s arc that all build on top of each other and hinge HEAVILY on unreliable narrator interpretations so bear with me

In my relisten I’m at the beginning of s3, and it always shocks me a bit at how quickly she interprets Martin’s interaction with her as hostile.  I’m going to skip over the “it’s understandable, Melanie’s had a hard time in her career” disclaimers since there’s plenty of meta on that already, and instead follow the effects of this tendency: not on others, this time, but on her

(This got absurdly long and covers so many episodes so I’m going to split it into separate pre- and post-bullet surgery posts)

Rewinding a bit, the last time she was at the Institute, she was starting to get along with Jon before he seemed confused about her comment on “the other Sasha.”  It takes her a split second to interpret that confusion as him suddenly deciding to gaslight and mock her, gets angry and tells him there is something seriously wrong with him, and leaves before he can ask what she means.  Given how tenuous their truce was and the fact she and Jon had mocked each other in the past, it’s an outburst that at least has some personal history behind it.

But only a couple episodes later, we learn that it’s not just Jon she responds to in this way.  In TMA 84, she meets our Martin Blackwood!  Customer service voice opposite-of-Jon politeness extraordinaire!  And as soon as he gets confused about the two Sasha comment, she.......immediately assumes that HE is also trying to gaslight her.  She insists that “I’m not doing this again” without giving him a chance to ask or explain, so they miss the opportunity to piece together the deal with the Not!Sasha.  Her doing this with someone she just met shows a much broader pattern than her interactions with Jon.

That very episode, Elias offers Melanie a job, and she accepts despite Martin’s protests.  Later, she accuses them all of them being an “old boy’s club” because she interpreted Martin’s warnings as sexism rather than trying to protect her.  As the audience, we see the unreliable narrator of her perspective at work: we know that Jon and Martin were genuinely confused, and we know that Martin was trying to save her, and that all of these instances were her seeing it as people being out to get her.

Hop forward to the notorious gossip scene in TMA 106.  Here, Melanie complains about Martin being hostile to her.  My first assumption was that this was all offscreen, but after this parade of misinterpretation and comparing to her and Martin’s actual interactions, I have to wonder:

TMA 84, after Martin tells Melanie about the murder, and right before Elias interrupts:

Martin:  Are you sure you’re alright?

Melanie:  Yes!  I just got… God, I’m kind of at the end, you know?

Martin:  The end of what?

Melanie:   Everything.  Friends, clues, savings. Everything.  Options.  There’s nowhere left for me to go . I don’t know why, but…  I just, I just felt that perhaps coming here might help.  And talking things out with Jon.  I mean, I mean he’s awful, but at least he listens, you know?

Martin:   (soft) Yeah.  ...I’m sorry.  Um, is there anything that I could, like, maybe...do for you?

They get interrupted immediately after this, so this was the first impression Melanie was given.  Then, when Elias offers the job, she...assumes Martin’s “I don’t think that’s a good idea” is from sexism, when he’d just been talking about murders and disappearances that caused that very job opening.

TMA 88 

Melanie:   Are you alright?

Martin:  Yeah… Sorry, just a lot of change recently, y’know.  You and John and Sasha and… everything’s gone a bit wrong.  It’s the not knowing, you know?  I mean, Jon’s still alive.  Not sure why, but I’m sure of that.  But Sasha, I…

Melanie:   Yes, it’s… it’s probably, um…

Martin:   Sorry, sorry, I’m...  What do you need?

Next interaction!  Oh this one HURTS.  Martin takes her question literally, and starts telling her why she’s not alright, a reverse of their earlier exchange.  But Melanie came by for a question and wasn’t prepared for an honest answer, so Martin quickly reels it in and asks what he can do for her once again.

Skipping forward a bit in that same scene:

Martin:   Oh, you weren’t here when we took the place over from Gertrude!  It’s been over a year just to get it like this.  I mean, I think the database was on Jon’s list, but--

Melanie:  So how do you track someone down?

Martin:   Oh, oh well, y’know, we’ve a few contacts in various record offices around the place.  Aside from that it’s just… just a bit of detective work, really.  Tim used to do a great line in impersonating people to utility companies!  Heh, the number of times he got them to give him ‘his own’ address--

Melanie:  Right, right… Um, this one, the name is 'Jude Perry.’ Doesn’t mean anything to you, does it?

I LOVE THIS EXCHANGE.  I TREASURE IT.  Having bottled up his emotions, Martin is going in full Friendly Helpful Coworker mode.  There are so many little details here signaling that he’s embracing her as part of the team, sharing anecdotes about Tim’s shenanigans and Jon’s old plans, looping her in as One of Them as he helps her get what she needs.  This is the kind of approach you go to management trainings to get, to help new hires feel welcome and part of things.  But alas, Melanie is in a hurry and wants to cut to the chase, so all this is lost on her.

TMA 98 - I won’t copy it all in here because it’s long, but this is an overwhelmingly positive interaction.  She asks if he’s okay, but he bottles it up and says he’s fine.  This time, she presses, and he admits it’s because of the statements.  Martin ends up asking for help!! and Melanie agrees!  She’s on the way to murder Elias, but she still gets credit for “I’ll ask him to cut you some slack.”  Then she invites him to drinks!

And then.... TMA 106

Melanie:   Anyway, Martin’s always been lovely to you.

Basira:  Hmm. I don’t know, I mean, you should have seen him when I turned up last year. I think he thought I was trying to steal his precious Archivist.

Melanie:   Ahhh. I got the exact same when Jon was hiding out, and came to me with his “source on the inside” stuff.  Martin was not impressed.

WAIT WHAT

We just looked over all their interactions!  They were all soft and lovely and welcoming!!  But then we hear Melanie with “well unlike how he is to me, Martin is nice to you.”  This was taken at face value for years, but when you line up all of the above, I feel there is a strong basis to say this is another case of Melanie’s first impressions + over-defensiveness gone wrong.  Just like we saw her initial bickerings with Jon solidify into series-long hostility, her interpreting Martin’s confusion as gaslighting and warnings about the job as sexism seems to have doomed her opinion of him long-term.  We hear Martin being kind and concerned and welcoming, then hear Melanie contrast it as bad treatment.

Recently, a mutual considered this even further to how she talked about losing all of her friends with the Ghost Hunt UK circles:

Melanie:  Even back then, I could feel all my old friends starting to distance themselves from me. ...  I stopped asking the others for help, and I kept my research to myself. I talked to them less and less. By the time I was arrested, I think a lot of them had already given up on me.

I have to wonder...did this sort of dynamic play out here, too?  Did she assume that her friends’ concern was judgment or hostility?  Were they giving up on her, or did she lash out and push them away?  Either way, it’s easy to see parallels to s2 Jon in her description, here, with her withdrawing and diving alone into increasingly risky research without asking for help.  And s2 Jon definitely shared Melanie’s tendency to see offers for help and support as hostile.  (Aside:  I interpret her and Georgie as not very close at this point, like a networking contact rather than a friend; Melanie comes to Jon for someone to talk to about her struggles above her, and Georgie seems to be unaware of all of Melanie’s encounters pre-s3)

And on that downer note I am ending part 1...but PART 2 IS GOING TO BE WAY HAPPIER THAN THIS.  Here, we see Melanie with a lot of people who would have supported her if she let them:  Martin, Jon, possibly the friends she said abandoned her.  But in her effort to protect herself and not let history repeat for how she’d been hurt in the past, she ends up alone and spiraling.

[capblacksails]

From the embers of the shadows in our pasts (a phoenix will rise)

Post-Canon. Silver-centered. John Silver is a lost man after having lost Madi. He goes to the only person he knows who understands his loss. And (un)surprisingly, here starts a journey full of love… (In short : It’s +20 years of love(s). It’s past hurts, and growth. It’s tying Black Sails to Treasure Island, somehow. Includes also THE two scenes we’ve been robbed of in 4x10: James/John and Madi/John) (James/Thomas, James/John, John/Madi(past), James/Miranda/Thomas(past), Thomas&John). If this fic was BS soundtrack: It would be ‘Funeral At Sea’ I guess?

Read it all : FFnet / AO3 / Tumblr

Companion piece - a collection of canon compliant shorts: The Memories Chest: AO3 / Tumblr / FFnet

From the embers of the shadows in our pasts (a phoenix will rise)

Excerpt part IXc:

"I used to see him as a devil come to be my doom. But he turned out to be my salvation, huh." "And now you will be his." 

XI. (part 3)

James stands up anxiously when he sees Thomas leaving John's hut. Thomas gives him a reassuring smile as he hurries to him, and James feels the pressure around his chest loosen some, if not yet disappear.

"He says he needs to think; but he's calmed down. We had a good talk." Thomas tilts his head, understanding. "But you're planning to watch his door all night, aren't you..."

And Thomas sits down on the stairs, not needing James to answer his question. James sits back down next to him, thankful for his silent support as they stand guard.

After a long time, Thomas stands up.

"It's getting cold."

Thomas gets inside; then comes out again, holding their blankets in his arms.

"Now, come on then."

And that's how James ends up wrapped in Thomas's arms under a blanket, leaning against Thomas's chest as they lean against John's door, making it impossible for them to miss John leaving, if it should come to that.

"Thank you, my Thomas", is all James says.

"Hush, my love", is Thomas's only answer in his ear, a soft kiss against his temple...

/

They jerk awake as the door opens and they stumble, literally, at John's foot. They hear John's surprised intake of breath at the sight before they even see him. And when they do see him? They are stunned completely silent.

John doesn't even wait for them to get to their feet:

"Don't be late for dinner. It's tuesday. You know people can never get enough of my pig's recipe."

A blinding smile, and John passes them, on his way to the kitchens, as they can only stare, still...

Thomas blinks, while standing up: "What was *that*?"

"He's staying", James simply lets out, wonder evident in his voice.

"You’re certain?"

"Yes", James explains, finally getting to his feet. "It's his way to tell me he's staying. Except for the braids - which he kept, of course - this is how he looked, when I started to like him; I told him once. He found it fitting, I suppose. Besides, it will be his call, if - but he’d probably rather how he looked when he was with Madi to stay, well, just for her... So... The hair is somehow shorter, and the stubble thicker, but he managed well enough with the small blade he keeps for tending his leg. I hope though no one will realize he has one..."

"Well... People will probably simply stare instead of think about exactly when or where he got rid of his beard and cut his hair. Could have been yesterday evening or this morning. Honestly? He's stunning. And you've seen him like that before? That jaw line just isn't fair."

James chuckles fondly; knowing of Thomas's appreciation for sharply chiselled features, indeed. Thomas slaps his arm playfully.

James can't help but sigh, though.

"And yet, believe me, the only urge I had to refrain when we met was about punching his face repeatedly. (sigh) He was so... annoying; irritating even. Knowing exactly how good he looked and using that knowledge shamelessly, flashing that damn bright smile and waving his damn big hands and-"

It's Thomas's turn to chuckle fondly.

"I think I understand now: You shit?"

James chuckles too, shortly; he had been smitten, hadn't he - even before actually wanting to be. Then he sobers up, sighing again, eyes following John, still visible in the distance.

"I used to see him as a devil come to be my doom - working against me. (lacing his fingers through Thomas's) But he turned out to be my salvation, huh."

"And now you will be his." (reassuringly and decisively tightening his grip on James's hand)

John takes the turn, disappearing from their vision.

"I love you Thomas."

"And I love you, my James."

James turns towards Thomas, heart in his eyes.

"For the record? I'll have you know his famous recipe is mostly mine; he simply improved it. And you'll always be the most handsome of all, to me."

Thomas smiles, humbly shaken by the devotion in James's gaze : "Seriously, James? You either need glasses; or you love me very, very much indeed."

James kisses their joined hands, not leaving Thomas's eyes: "How about both?"

Thomas laughs, leaning in for a proper kiss: "Definitely both then."

.

Oups. Sorry, I'm shameless. I guess I really wanted John to shave his beard. I have a thing for S2 Silver? But at least there's a valid reason for it?

Also. I just love how Thomas and James love each other. Who wants to cuddle them with me?