#safe mats

[fallenclan]

(distant sounds of Nick and Toro beating the shit out of a twoleg)

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[nananarc]

Bonus tag where you are from because I'm curious on the culture difference

[markantonys]

the wondergirls: gaslight (egwene), gatekeep (nynaeve), girlboss (elayne)

the wonderboys: mansplain (perrin), manipulate (rand), manwhore (mat)

[xskyll]

[molluskzone]

blake age timeline ^-^ im gonna make one for everyone i think

[pyotrkochetkov]

intermission interview | hurricanes @ penguins | november 29, 2022

[nat-seal-well]

I’m so here for show-Mat’s characterization. He was a favorite in the books and it’s so much fun to get to explore his story in a new way 💙

[alexi-01]

ter stegen is going to ruin lamine’s, gavi’s, cubarsi’s, etc etc careers on my momma we need to dispose of him

[robustcornhusk]

complaining about people who are wrong on the internet, because i was trying to see how much running people were doing for their first <1:40 half

comments about someone who was 24/male trying to break 1:40:

Honestly, at your age, I didn't have to do anything to run a half under 1:40. Even my friend whose main sport is Judo ran under 1:40.

I didn’t really have to do anything to break 1:40. Just being young and at a decent weight gets you 90% of the way there…

went and checked the results from the half i ran last fall.

overall, 308/2662 (11.6%) of finishers ran under 1:40:00

restricting it to men's 20-29, 101/481 (20.1%) of finishers ran under 1:40:00

sub 1:40 is more than respectable, fuckheads!! you still beat 80% of all men 20-29! that kinda-sorta implies that most men in that age would struggle to run a 1:40!

as far as i can tell, every single soccer player comes out of the woodwork to talk about how they'd never run a day in their life before their first race, they just showed up and did a 90-minute half.

this is of course embarrassing for me&others, because it turns out the soccer players spend more time running than many runners (this is probably how donald thomas's not-yet-teammates felt: some random basketball player at their university turned out to be better at high jump than all the track&field athletes.) but at least i don't pretend i'm not trying really hard.

also extrapolating from how @autogeneity trains, i'm not totally surprised that someone whose primary sport is a form of martial arts could do a 1:40 half. 3 hours of sparring and pushups... i'd die.

[thomas-angus-thorne]

THE GUITAR DEKNXNLLEEXWNJEWOD£NEXKJ

[fluff-writing]

Sudden mating fever in High Heaven and Santuary. Run your imagination wild xD and for more fun cantakerous meet omegaverse? :D

Okay the funny thing is

This was a thing for Fluffy Angels. They didn't have heats or anything. Once every year or so they had a big orgy and then the Arch created a feedback loop of Light Energy so that both It and The Angels could spawn.

Hell learned the hard way to leave Heaven the heck alone when the angels were multiplying. Everyone is already high on lust-rage, plus over-alert due to the Arch's vulnerability, and cockblocking half the populace is just bad strategy all around.

(A few lucky 'cubi have gotten themselves roped into the whole mess a few times. When mating fever his the Dimension of Hair, no one is safe.)

Roughly half of all nephalem inherited the Yearly Banging Instinct, including one bird-Rat. He and Muffy had lots of fun every October. Kalan made very sure to give them ample time and space to be nasty without interruption.

Cantankerous and Omegaverse are kinda on opposite ends of the seriousness spectrum. One is pure crack + smut, the other is my longfic that I try to keep relatively serious. CantankerRat might be vaguely interested in the biological differences between the dimensions, but he's also busy trying to kill his mother and doesn't have time to get involved in that nonsense. Mat barely knows what a penis is. Remember, angels in Cantankerous are strictly asexual, and reproduce by way of Arch unless demons are involved (and even then, Lilith just bled some Mysterious Light Goo out of Inarius and used that to implant a baby in herself. She's a real go-getter.) Rat hasn't gotten around to giving Malthael The Talk on account of the whole Matricide thing. Alpha-Rat would try, and likely confuse poor Mat even more than usual. Omega-Malthael is laughing at all of them.

If we stick Cantankerous Inarius and Beta-Inarius in a room together long enough they will hatch a plan to detonate Sanctuary. Doesn't matter which Sanctuary. Heaven too while they're at it. And Hell. Actually, throw all of reality away, they're starting everything over from the top.

If Cantankerous Lilith and Alpha-Lilith enter a room together, only one is leaving that room alive.

[markantonys]

elayne going “he’s my babygirl now and i will spoil him and nurse him back to health” as soon as she lays eyes on the cute peasant who brained himself in her garden..............dressing aviendha up in fancy clothes and making her blush by telling her how pretty she is...............being horrified when mat shows up in caemlyn dressed like shit and practically begging him to let her sic the royal tailor on him, and also paying for the production of his weapons of mass destruction...............polycule sugar mommy

[deathbypufferfish]

Waiting for Coconut Pete to wake up to play with his new toys

[molluskzone]

eve this time :] alt kid hairstyle under the cut

realistically her hair would've been long and kept like this bc her mom helped her with her hair and would've kept it neat by having it braided for a few days BUT i wasnt really feeling the braids how i drew them so idk. its difficult for me to design hairstyles that still look childlike cause i always hated having mine up as a kid LOL. in fact i would only have it up at school because my TEACHERS made it a REQUIREMENT for ME AND ONLY ME to have my hair in a ponytail in class because i wasnt making enough EYE CONTACT and they didnt want me to HIDE BEHIND MY BANGS. because theyre haters. though honestly i should've labeled her as being younger she looks more uhhh 9 than 11? maybe? im so bad at aging children off of appearance. im the guy going "uhhhhh youre what 6, 7?" and its a 12 year old LMAO

also eve isn't a full year older than blake, she was born september 1984 while blake was march 1985... they're in the same grades in school, but i wrote the ages based on what she would turn that year.

[psychic-waffles]

I am trying my best 💪💪💪