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princesseevee06 · 8 months

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are there any changes to the floormasters in ytr? <- autistic abt the floormasters

im assuming rio ranger doesnt exist here, because. sei. but im curioieus

i am so glad you asked!!! i’ve been waiting for an excuse to talk about the floormasters, they’re just not as fleshed out as i want them to be yet…(this is partially because i keep agonizing over what i want their designs to look like. it’s hard to find a balance between “silly yet stylish” and “just walked out of the evil clown circus”)

originally, i was planning to keep them the same but i quickly realized that would not work because sei and sou are both participants and therefore ranger and “midori” never Exist. so yes, they (most of them) are swapped too!

i will say that i kept gashu and meister in the same roles though. gashu because i think it would be vv interesting to see kai interact with his father in the death game (since he never gets the chance to in canon), and meister because 1. he almost certainly has ties to sara and 2. atp in the game he hasn’t played a big enough role to the point that i really even know what to do with him? so i was hesitant to swap him at all.

but but but!!! i’ll get into who takes the roles of the other 4 floormasters below (i hope this is what you were asking for???)!!! bear with me if it’s a little barebones compared to the main cast descriptions i’m still figuring things out

Megumi Sasahara > Sue Miley

Tbh I have my suspicions that canon Megumi already has ties to Asunaro so making her a floormaster in this AU felt like a logical move. I don’t have that much to say about her as of yet, but since she’s the first floormaster she sets a much different tone for the beginning of the story in comparison to Miley. Whereas Miley’s presentation feels very ‘cartoonishly evil,’ Megumi is a lot more serious about the game which kind of hammers in for the participants how highly important their captors regard the Death Game. Basically…even more dread and unease…especially after Nao’s death.

Hinako Mishuku (fake) > Rio Ranger

So this one is kind of what spurred on the idea of swapping the floormasters as well, because I really wanted to do something with pink-haired Hinako and/or see her interact with black-haired Hinako. Then I thought of a very tragic idea: what if pink-haired Hinako and black-haired Hinako were twins?

So I thought of the name Hana Mishuku for her. Basically, my idea was that the Mishuku twins’ parents split up because one of them started getting involved with Asunaro, and as a result the twins were separated. While Hinako led a relatively normal life, Hana was stuck with her father and unwittingly forced into becoming an agent for Asunaro at a very young age.

She acts similar to her canon personality, with a sort of dry callousness. She does still have a soft spot for her sister (and seeing her again after years doesn’t help) but she believes that’s something she has to ruthlessly stamp out in order to survive in the organization. (can you tell thinking about her makes me sad…)

Shunsuke Hayasaka > Tia Safalin

I am so sorry to all Hayasaka fans but his character is the definition of wasted potential to me. He clearly had ties to Asunaro (albeit seemingly unwillingly) and yet this is something that comes up like. Once? So I decided to take advantage of it here and make him play a bigger role. Rather than just doing dirty work for the organization, he gets swept into it and he HATES it. He’s pretty much only following orders because he doesn’t want to be killed, and rather than acting like a mild-mannered office worker he acts much more like a jaded, pessimistic office worker (someone please help this man). I also think he’d have a fun dynamic with Hana, but that’s something I’ll likely elaborate on in future doodles…

Momdori/Mrs. Hiyori/whatever you wanna call her > Midori

This one was probably the most fun for me to put together. Maybe it’s bias because the mysteries of Sou Hiyori’s family will forever intrigue me, but I think that his mom (or who I presume is his mom but really we only have a silhouette) has such interesting potential. I definitely don’t believe her and Sou would have a healthy dynamic here, what with just the way both of them act (i.e. insufferably) and their seemingly incompatible views of Asunaro (borderline religious devotion vs. as a tool for further experimentation/entertainment). (i could go on for literally hours and hours about their dynamic in this au but i’ll save that for another day)

As for her actual role in the story, I think she’d act very similar to Midori at first, but over time be revealed to have less of the childish behavior and more cruelty + cult-ish behavior. She’d also regard the participants differently: constantly emphasizing how they’re all fated to be sacrifices for God etc, etc until everyone is incredibly annoyed. (good thing for them that the goal of the subgame is to kill her!)

uhhhhh uhhhh anyways i don’t know what else to say but i hope this satisfies your curiosity! i’ll definitely revisit the floormasters again once i figure out what the hell to do with their designs but for now, as thanks for reaching the end of this rant take this momdori:

#princesseevee answers #yttd #your turn ryoko #megumi sasahara #hinako mishuku #shunsuke hayasaka #momdori #my art

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clambuoyance · 2 years

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do you have any favorite hyper-specific tropes you enjoy? like a certain line of dialogue or character type or something

OKAY LETS SEE

1) Since it’s on the mind bc of toh—i’m an absolute sucker for found siblings. Of course, i enjoy the found family trope in general and most variations (middleaged character adopting a random ass kid, etc etc) , but when its focus is on siblings? I eat that shit upppp. I mean relationships like luz and hunter, any of the dc families tbh, the rgb siblings (nya lloyd kai), or my ocs keiko and rolin—they scratch a special part of my brain.

Maybe its because i’m eldest sibling myself, and my brother is only two years younger making us pretty close in age, but i just really like sibling relationships and they hit more than parent/child ones for me😭🙏 We don’t always get along, but i’d say we have a pretty strong relationship now

Something about going through the same motions, esp if ur both still trying to find ur place in the world, and knowing you have someone to rely on is just so special to me. Even with blood siblings, it doesn’t really feel like unconditional love at first. Like, you have to choose to be someone who will care and be there for them. Urgh idk it just feels different even though with parents it’s also a choice to care about someone. Like with a parent or guardian, it’s like you want to expect them to have all the answers, but with someone closer to ur age who chooses to treat you like family, it’s like—well we both don’t know what we’re doing but we have each other to lean on.

And the “found” part isn’t necessary but just a nice treat bc i feel like it highlights that Active choosing to care for someone like family. waaah. Like Kai in s1 of ninjago having a whole arc that leads to him leaving behind his own desires to save tiny lloyd, and then literally promising to always look after lloyd after , or luz promising to keep hunter safe bc he’s family now, and then my story with my ocs rolin n keiko is all about them becoming siblings to each other😭 it just makes me feel sooo emotional

also sibling banter 💥💥💥 i feel like u can say more uncalled for shit w siblings

So yeah if you look at my list of faves don’t be surprised if u see a lot of characters who have a significant sibling relationship in their story 🙏

2) Now i dont know if this counts as a trope, but as for fave character type theres usually this One scene that makes me go Oh i love them. and that scene or line tends to go like this: Character up to this point has shown a fun, perhaps confident or carefree personality, but as soon as they’re alone, it’s revealed to the audience they’re capable of feeling so much more. Idk i guess im thinking kon at the campfire, or wukong in lmk specifically always being chill then being serious when he’s alone

3) Also in category of things that make me love a character: slapstick comedy to highlight dorkiness. or honestly just any type of comedy that undercuts a character’s supposed Cool/Importance Factor. 💀 like the amount of slapstick a character goes through has to be proportional to how unaware the character is of their own dorkiness. Im thinking Kai bumping his head while threatening garmadon or bragging about his skills only to get slammed by a tree (or a rock. or a wall. the list goes on.). Or Kon saying he’s fine cuz he can fly only to wham his head when the ship turns and then subsequently get flung around while the ship flies, or slamming his face straight into the ground cuz he’s an idiot.

Or like, Karkat’s whole thing. he’s a walking clown circus. sollux going “do NOT run that computer virus” and karkat ignoring him only for the computer to explode in his face. idk that shit makes me laugh

4) When characters start talking about how they don’t wanna be left behind—it depends on the writing but that usually Hits for me 😭

um i could probably think of more but thats all i got for now

#i base like 80% of keiko n rolin on me and my brother #keiko is more like me but rolins older but also like me #we were p close as kids and did everything together and then you know in middleschool and highschool we both be going thru our own shi #kinda harder to connect #but we’re both older n he’s out of his teen angst phase so we chill now #mmmmmmm character types.#ironically im not very confident or carefree yet my faves are all so cockyyyy #also all my life. ive never really been an Emo character fan.#biggest example pjo i thought nico was fine but he was never a fave like percy was to me 💀#and in anime theres always the Happy go lucky protag and the emo friend #never stanned the emo friend jfjfjfjeie #and YET rolin would fall in the emo friend category.#clam answers

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soartfullydone · 6 months

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I finished my first bg3 playthrough and just need to ramble about act 3 things specifically (spoiler-heavy, don't read this)

There's so much about this game that's great. But so much of act 3 made me go from :D to :/ like people were not kidding about how unpolished it feels. There's some positive thoughts here, but there's also a LOT of critique sooo don't read this probably fr fr.

The amount of bugs are egregious in act 3. I normally have a high threshold for bugs in games. They happen. So long as I don't lose gameplay hours over them, I'm pretty fine. But omg, I finally found my threshold. Just so much that distracted and detracted from cutscenes, from character moments, from the immersion of it all. It's hard to praise Larian for showing up the AAA studios when they turn around and actually do much the same as them: rush an unfinished product to launch. BG3 should've been worked on another year at least so the poor devs wouldn't have to go through the crunch time they are as I type this.

Acts 1 and 2 feel very tight and cohesive, act 1 especially (and I swear, act 2 was the shortest, easy, and yes, I did everything), but in act 3, you start to see so many holes, so many quest lines abandoned, rewritten, and unfinished. Quick question: why was Cazador's palace attached to a random guard wall in the Lower City when he's as upper echelon as they come? Oh, because we cut all of the Upper City from the game but still needed to resolve Astarion's storyline? Got it. What was the point of me tracking down the bomb factory in the fireworks shop if there are no repercussions for either destroying it or leaving it alone? Oh, just a reason to connect Rivington to Baldur's Gate, same as the Dribbles quest? Cool.

Speaking of Dribbles, I almost couldn't even finish the damn quest because I stole the clown's hand from the kobald and the game didn't acknowledge it because a cutscene didn't trigger. I had to do the most roundabout series of tests and finally figured out I had to put the hand in a pouch marked as wares, sell the wares to the kobald, steal the pouch back, drop the hand in front of him, and ensure he caught me stealing it.

That being said, there is nothing about the Circus segment itself I would change. Pure confetti all the way down. Enjoyed being turned into a stinky wheel of cheese.

I love love love the Auntie Ethel quest line. The only thing I could've asked for in relation to it is even more fae shit.

On that note, loved Valeria. Loved how Normal a miniature flying elephant detective was.

The Emperor's sex scene? Delightful. So glad I got to experience that through a friend. Can't wait to be a freak like that someday.

The House of Hope was Hot AF. I died at the Haarlep part; it was everything I wanted: a Raphael """romance""", a terrible deal, exhibitionism, companion-wide disapproval, body and mind violation. Honestly, Larian DOES get full points for that. (Now, make it a true possibility with Raphael, cowards. Let me ride that pillow princess.) Can't WAIT to fully go through with this deal someday with a different character because Riven wasn't the one.

The Raphael fight was honestly incredibly fun (the soundtrack lol A+++) and I didn't find it that challenging in Balanced mode. Like, I thought it was going to wreck my shit, but it was easily one of my most favorite parts of the game. Getting to the room to go through with it, however, was a trial and a half.

Act 3 also had two, if not three, of my least favorite quests of the whole game, tbh. And when I say least favorite, I mean they were just plain not fun to play. At all. Top of mind is the Free the Artist quest with the haunted house, which should've been fun but was just an incredible pain in the ass the whole time, and the Iron Throne quest, which I had to do no less than 8 times to get the exact results I wanted because bugs would thwart me at every turn. NPCs not dashing because their pathways were somehow blocked. Characters getting stuck up the ladder, not allowing anyone else to climb it. Having a character physically move to pull a switch to lock a door behind them only to get them permanently stuck on the wrong side of the door. Did I mention this quest was also a timed trial? lol lol

Kept expecting for my betrayal of the Zhentarim in act 1 to have Repercussions when I reached the city, their stomping ground, in act 3. lol lol

With the flood of companion interactions and cutscenes I got in act 1, it's a shame how much those dried up in act 2 and were practically non-existent in act 3. Their personal quest lines are all you have, and once they're over, you'll maybe get one final cutscene and maybe a romantic one and that's it.

Karlach barely feels like she had a real arc. You do a few things to keep her infernal engine from exploding, but then there's nothing more you can do and she resigns herself to death, refusing to go to Avernus. She and Dammon stop interacting, and the game gives you no other avenues to explore besides a confrontation with Gortash that went about as well as I expected. Just dissatisfaction after dissatisfaction with her. Which is a shame because her VA killed it the entire time! The best I could do for her was take her to the House of Hope for a few hours of relief, but not even an archdevil's home has anything more to offer her.

And it's wild because her death scene was super emotional and touching. I was ready to burst into tears until Wyll ran up and begged her to come to Avernus with him, to live. Then, I wanted to cry for another reason! (My Wyll lost his warlock powers but saved his father and became the Blade of Avernus.) This made so much sense to me as an option for Karlach a long time ago, that I was both relieved and frustrated that this was The Solution the whole time.

I gave Karlach the option to choose what she wanted, and she chose to go with him. What has all this been for, then? So much of Karlach's narrative and the tragedy of it hangs on her absolute refusal to return to the place that tortured her so badly just to live—but that turns out to be only solution this whole time? Why couldn't we just go to Avernus and find something that actually helps her then?

Karlach and Wyll got short-changed in many respects to their arcs, which is wild considering all the touchpoints they have with each other. I'm still frustrated that I, not Wyll, had to choose between severing the pact and saving his father. Even though I achieved both, Wyll should've been given the option to make that decision based on how you interacted with him throughout the game, same as every other character gets to make. At least he gets to choose between becoming a city official and the Blade of Avernus. But it's wild that we have two characters here who were used and enslaved by devils, and that's either not really addressed or resolved (Karlach) or it's only passively handled (Wyll).

And god, I loved the final scene with Wyll and Karlach in Avernus! How Karlach accepted that she would live, how she appreciated both the horror and the opportunity that Avernus presented, and how she wasn't alone anymore. I loved how confident she gets, assuming the role of the experienced expert/hunter in this place. And then Wyll. Who has also hunted and explored Avernus before. Doesn't even get to speak. Just smiles encouragingly the whole time, silent. This scene is so clearly written for Karlach with a Tav, and it's. Frustrating. Wyll and Karlach should be straight-up talking shop together right now. If this is the resolution of both of their arcs together, then it should be written for both of them together.

I'm a Wyll fan who loves the character he is, but I also resonate with folks who are frustrated losing the EA Wyll I never got to meet. I love what I've seen of his romance arc; it's his character arc that has me scratching my head at times, just because I see where they could've done a lot more with more time. The Ansur quest was... interesting but feels very tacked on at the last minute, and the twist that occurs from it isn't even about Wyll. And it matters for all of two seconds and then is never brought up again except to remind you to never speak of it lol what?? At least the lesson Wyll learns is one I knew all along, which is he's the hero Baldur's Gate needs and deserves.

And Gale! I'm honestly not even counting his arc as resolved. That was a joke. The crown falls into the lake?? And based on how you talked to him, he decides whether he's going to fish it out or not??? And I don't even get to see it??? For me, Gale decided to leave it alone, not giving it to Mystra or using it to become a god, which is. Wild. Considering my Tav, Riven, was very much Team "Fuck Mystra" and didn't discourage him from the god path. I was expecting a whole moment like what Astarion got between completing the ritual or not, but nope! You've gotta be joking.

I think the only arcs I'm satisfied with are Lae'zel's and Shadowheart's, even though I still don't know how and why the latter dyed her hair white lol. (I mean, symbolically, I get it, but I'm half-convinced her hair's not even supposed to be white because her portrait never changed hair color and the other characters only commented on her bangs like is this a universal bug that everyone accepted and Larian doesn't want to own up to?)

I also wish that if Halsin, Jaheira, and Minsc are going to be companions that they would've given them proper arcs, too. Halsin especially since he comes along earlier. Jaheira gets more of a pass since she's older and a legacy character and I love her, but I could take or leave Minsc tbh. Haven't gotten Minthara yet, so opinion's still out on her.

I loved Jaheira's little adopted family. A shame I never saw them again or got anymore resolution! (More on resolution in general later)

I guess I'll talk about Astarion's arc. I loved so much of it, but I'll be honest; I was having the most fun with him in acts 1 and 2. The sex repulsion thing, while key to his arc, also seemed to dry up all the romantic chemistry he has between himself and your character. Part of that might be because his arc turns so hard into obsessing over the ritual. But part of it is a Huge Missed Opportunity between exploring the difference between Sex as a Means to an End and exploring with him what actual intimacy looks like. Sure, you get the hand-holding and the hug, once, which can easily turn into a Just Friends thing. But where was learning what easy sensuality and intimacy looks like with a partner who won't pressure you into making it about sex? The graveyard scene was great! Sure wish there was more where that came from!

Astarion's romantic arc became a lot more about what Astarion wanted versus what you both want, argue with the wall. Sure, he wants it to become something real and wants to take things slow, but at what point is a Tav who was used for protection through sex allowed to be sexually frustrated and not shamed for it? The only time that's even acknowledged is if Tav considers a poly relationship with Astarion and Halsin, and we're supposed to feel bad on Astarion's account and not Tav's. Well, I'm sorry, but for Riven, Astarion would've been her first sexual partner and relationship, and he knowingly turned that switch on to make her obsessed and pliant towards him. It's unrealistic to just. Expect her to not be sexually frustrated, to grin and bear it, just because he's finally acknowledging his own automony. Part of that autonomy means taking ownership for what he did as an exploitive sexual partner; I'm not saying he needs to get her off or anything, but this is where displaying actual intimacy could've helped while they were taking a break from sex. Instead, the game really does have Astarion cut her off cold turkey with no further romantic scenes outside of the odd line here and there while discussing the ritual, and p e r s o n a l l y, I take Great Issue with that as a woman with some fucking self-respect.

Considering how hard this romance goes on the front-end with sex, flirting, and banter, Astarion's romance arc feels very foreplay-heavy with a very dissatisfying finish, which I'm not impressed with, okay? (And yes, my last romantic scene with him was bugged all to hell, so I didn't get to experience it as a cutscene, just fragmented lines in a box of a room. In fact, a lot of his romance lines throughout act 3 would either get cut-off or there'd be other buggy things happening that detracted from the scene.) At least he stays an asshole and not this uwu baby that so much of the fandom wants to pretend he is lol

That said, and even though I haven't done it yet, I am so sure that it'll be Ascended Astarion >>>>>>>> Good End Astarion for me lol. Give me the dark, fucked-up ends forever, thanks.

I didn't even get one of the biggest payoffs from convincing Astarion not to Ascend. I had Shadowheart cast Daylight as an orb and not on an object, so when the other spawn got free, they took damage from the spell and ran away, disappearing forever. Cazador's staff was nowhere to be seen because it was tied to a cutscene with those spawn, so now??? The ~7,000 spawn trapped in those arcane cells are just going to be driven mad as they starve to death, which we know from Astarion being held in solitary for a year is going to take a very long time. Meaning the more humane thing to do would've been to just. Let Astarion go through with the ritual, damning himself to save them from a fate worse than death. Great storytelling, Larian, we didn't test that Daylight spell at all, did we? Good thing I made a save with Astarion post-Ascension, tbh.

(Which, the fact that you still have to convince Astarion not to go through with the ritual, despite your high approval, romance, and all the things he's seen getting there, fascinates me. So many other characters will do the right thing if you've planted the seeds and give them the chance to make the choice themselves, but Astarion is determined to see the ritual through by default unless you roll real good. It's Big Sexy of him.)

On the one hand, this game has SO many more companion cutscenes and reactions than past rpg games like this. But on the other, it doesn't balance them well throughout the game. It doesn't help that I played the version with approval thresholds being lower than they should've been. But it goes back to how much of act 1 was written, built out, and tested in EA, and how much the rest of the game was... not.

Also what was the point of Yenna besides being nice to an orphan kid? Why did she disappear from camp for days and days that was never acknowledged? How many more bugs with kids did I experience in this playthrough, the Mol quest also being fucked sideways?

Gortash was so hot and SO underused and for what??? Jason Isaacs, b r u h!!! Oh well, more reason to play Dark Urge at some point.

I also never got the option to Find Familiar my owlbear and he stopped moving in the camp in act 3, and I'm sad, okay? He does somehow become fully grown?? for the final battle and armored up, but you're joking if you think I'm risking my baby boy like that

That said, I did like how the final battle played out, how you could summon your allies to help fight. (Zevlor redeemed himself and survived, baby!) I liked the various stages of it. But omg... the audio problems. A whole area where background music didn't play for over 20 minutes. Where characters had dialogue but no audio track. The immersion was in tatters for me, and given all the character arc resolution problems I discussed above, yeah, no WONDER I'm fucking frustrated. All this build up, to just trip at the finish line?

It was also wild how. Abrupt. The ending is. A series of cutscenes with a few final choices here and there, with random companions interjecting their opinions/perspective, but. There's no goodbye tour. There's no talking to everyone for the last time before the FINAL scenes happen and the credits roll. No "what will you do now?" discussions besides Karlach and Wyll's abrupt leave (made even worse by Astarion's abrupt leave for Reasons). I've been traveling with most of these people since the first hour of the game, and I can't even say to them "goodbye and thank you"??? We've poked fun at Bioware throughout BG3's launch, but they beat you there, Larian. Muchly.

The ending cutscenes were also not edited together cohesively, which might be why the Astarion romance scene bugged out. It's possible it's out of order, but it either goes: Companions talking about celebrating, Astarion getting scalded by the sun and running away, Karlach's engine catching on fire, Wyll convincing her to save herself and the two running off, the narrator showing you the city and proclaiming you a hero, Astarion romance scene in a black box, Wyll and Karlach in Avernus, end credits. OR it goes: Companions talking about celebrating, Astarion being scalded and running off, Karlach's engine catching on fire, Wyll imploring her to live but you convince her to die, the narrator proclaiming you a hero, Astarion romance scene, credits. And that switch to the credits, both times, is a fast and hard switch.

Also okay FINE I'll be honest! How determined this game is to turn you illithid finally pissed me the fuck off! The whole game, I played a character who would Not Eat the Damn Tadpole for anything but who would still abuse her compulsion powers now and again. (Which, a shame that power went away in act 3, that was fun roleplaying.) The whole game, she decides and is given the option to decide that her own strength and those of her companions would be enough, and guess what? It's not lol. Someone still has to become illithid and eat Orpheus's brain. Picture it: I had Astarion, Gale, and Lae'zel with me, the latter two who still need their arcs completed, hence why they're here. And the choice I'm given is either: give the Emperor the stones and have him eat Orpheus' brain; turn myself into an illithid and eat Orpheus' brain, or free Orpheus and convince him to turn himself into an illithid (or have myself or a dying Karlach do it, and guess what? We'd still have to eat his brain). All but one of these choices will either have Lae'zel hate me forever or permanently end my Astarion romance. The only viable option, meanwhile, is depressingly anticlimactic and uninteresting. Yeah, I'll say it: BOOOOOOO!

I have so many characters I want to do different playthroughs with, but act 3 and its ending, man. The taste of it is not horrible but it's not great, either. Kinda torn between taking my time in the first two acts and giving the game a break, see if they fix the most annoying bug issues first. I don't hold out much hope that storytelling issues will be fixed, but god, I wish they would be. Gonna just hold it in and die until I can talk to any friend about it.

#mel's ramblings #bg3 spoilers

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matchamabs · 3 years

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BOTW (and AOC) GUYS: RANKED BY HOW HOT THEY ARE

get ready for some heinous opinions! so im ranking the guys in botw by how hot they are and im taking No criticism. idk if i forgot anyone but i tried

check it out under the cut

sorry but this twink is just. average. like Painfully average. hes like white bread. therefore he gets an average score. i can appreciate hes a cute lookin guy? but like. thats it. if u fancy link u probably like mayonnaise. he looks like mayonnaise. grow a fuckin tache or smth dude for the love of god. 5/10 very normal.

ok im a diehard bird simp but like... this boy is fuckin ugly lmao. hes pretty at the same time tho? nice smile, nice eyes, nice voice but yellow eyebrows? green eyes? red makeup? clown. he’s a bird clown. tho i guess some ppl find clowns hot so this one’s for the pennywise crowd. 5/10. he’s a 10/10 in my heart tho.

now this is a MAN. u got the good smile, the strong arms, the r i p p l i n g m u s c l e s. he is a man u can trust. his arm hair is a bit wild but if u dont like his incredible facial hair, then.... idc. 7/10. they made a rock handsome. thats impressive. 3 points off for the forehead vagina tho. dont like that.

hot fucking damn. this is what we in the biz call a raging dilf. he looks like the kind of dad that never grew out of his punk rock phase. idk how i feel abt the broken traffic light look but its fine. just look into his gorgeous eyes and listen 2 his deep gravelly voice as he tells u to fuck off and leave him alone. perfection. the voice already makes him like 20/10 but the mullet is fucking awful and he should be penalised for that. 8/10. grow a fringe like the rest of us.

ah the shape of water... ok yeah the fish is fuckable ill grant u that. hes All fuckin torso tho and his eyes r constantly pointing in different directions which is not the Most Flattering Look and he Will hit u with his head handlebars and it will hurt. the 24-pack aint half bad either but i always get this feeling that he looks like he skips... some kind of day. not arm day, not leg day, but... some kind of day. maybe brain day. 8/10. sharp teeth are always sexy.

10/10. i dont fuckin care if u hate his hair- this man probably invented the most effective hairspray in existence just to make that happen. respect him. u cannot deny hes hot tho like theres just Something about him. the confidence... the attitude... i worry about revealing his eyes tho. theres a 50% chance it will not work in ur favour and he’ll just look heinous. full 10/10 tho. old robbie is also not bad 2 look at if ur not a coward but he Might leave u for an easy bake oven so like. watch out for that.

well the queen saw something in him??? i genuinely fear the idea of ever getting to see his chin from under that magnificent beard tho. he’s probably got the jawline of a russian power lifter. anyway for an old guy hes not lookin that bad so long as u dont mind a receding hairline. ill b nice. 5/10. for a king u could do worse. ill be taking complaints about this take in my dms. bring a bat.

where do i begin. i love beedle. i rlly do but theres.... so much going on. personality is a 10/10, business skills are 10/10/ haircut is -50/10 and the crop top....? well ill give him 10/10 for confidence. 4/10 im sorry he is just a Lot to look at. he looks like rock lee tried to become a slutty pirate king. shonen jump will have a lot to answer for.

the colour scheme is... better than revali, tho i didnt realise how obnoxious it was until i actually got a good look at him. ive never seen a bird look so top heavy before but this mans got 5 kids so i have nothing but respect for my king. kass is for the dilf crowd that like the dad bods. 8/10 he is quite nice to look at ngl. he’s like revali but light mode.

ok yunobo is very cute i wont lie but the hair is just massively disarming. idk its all i can think about. is this a goron emo phase?? is that what that is?? ive been staring at it for like 5 minutes and i still cant work out if i like it or not. 5/10 he is a humble lad.

under all that gear kohga could look like willem dafoe x50 and id still find him attractive. he cant be hot tho. he just cant be. like looks wise he has to be 1/10 under that there is no way this man could feasibly be conventionally attractive and tbh i like it that way. banana boy gets 6/10. hotter than revali. revali looks like a clown but kohga looks like the entire fucking circus

there is nothing unattractive about bolson. 10/10. sha-ding

i hate the hair i hate the hair i hate the hair i hate the hair SO fucking much but the voice. he has to be hot under that gear with a voice like that. if hes not well. just close ur eyes. the voice will take care of the rest. 8/10 the crack in his mask actually makes him look sexier and i dont understand how that can happen

????????????????????????? he looks. like an old man? i swear those big wingy bits are his eyebrows but i cant Quite be sure. why would a tree need eyebrows. ??/10 keep ur questionable gifts to urself

-100000/10 who the fuck let this budget pokemon npc in here. he looks like he should b leading team ganon across the kanto region. he probably draws those lines on his face to make himself look older and listens to mother mother. im gonna punch his third eye. no this is not a biased opinion

#botw #breath of the wild #aoc #age of calamity #link #revali #teba #sidon #daruk #astor #prince sidon #hestu #kohga #sooga #yunobo #kass #bolson #beedle #legend of zelda #robbie

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guacam011y · 3 years

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***SPOILERS FOR WANDAVISION EPISODE 6***

So I’m still processing everything but holy shite that ep was wild...

FIRST THINGS FIRST - WANDA, VISION, BILLY AND PIETRO ALL IN COMIC ACCURATE-ISH COSTUMES AND TOMMY IN A MINI QUICKSILVER COSTUME

PIETRO CALLING BILLY AND TOMMY DEMON SPAWN - GOD DAMMIT, IT’S MEPHISTO ISN’T IT? HOUSE OF M HERE WE COME

HERB ASKING WANDA IF SHE WANTED SOMETHING CHANGED

AGNES ASKING VISION ABOUT THE AVENGERS AND STUFF AND AT FIRST SHE SEEMED GENUINELY FREAKED OUT BUT THEN STARTED LAUGHING MANIACALLY AND I STILL DON’T TRUST HER AND AGNES BEING DRESSED AS A WITCH? AGATHA HARKNESS WAS A WITCH - COINCIDENCE? I THINK NOT!

DARCY LOOKING OVER MONICA’S MED SCANS AND TELLING HER HOW THE HEX AFFECTS HER EACH TIME SHE GOES IN - IS SHE DEVELOPING HER POWERS?

PIETRO’S CORPSE - SCARED ME JUST AS MUCH AS VISION’S

MOVIES SHOWING IN THE THEATRE IN THE BACKGROUND - THE INCREDIBLES: A MOVIE BASED AROUND A SUPERHERO FAMILY AND THE PARENT TRAP: A MOVIE ABOUT TWINS WHO MEET AT CAMP AND TRY AND SET THEIR PARENTS UP

DON’T GO PAST ELLIS AVENUE - NOW I DON’T KNOW IF THIS IS A CONNECTION OR JUST A COINCIDENCE BUT ELLIS IS THE LAST NAME OF THE PRESIDENT DURING IRON MAN 3

TOMMY HAVING HIS SPEED POWERS AND BILLY HAVING HIS REALITY WARPING/TELEKINETIC POWERS - WELCOME SPEED AND WICCAN

A CALL BACK TO INFINITY WAR WHEN VISION EXITED THE HEX? SLIGHTLY DUSTING AND HE PROBABLY WON’T SURVIVE BEING OUTSIDE OF THE HEX - HE’LL JUST DIE AGAIN 🥲

I STILL DON’T TRUST HAYWARD - HE’S VERY SUS

DARCY BEING TAKEN INTO THE HEX WITH THE OTHER S.W.O.R.D AGENTS - HOPEFULLY WE CAN SEE THE OUTFITS THAT KAT DENNING’S WAS EXCITED ABOUT

I SWEAR THEY BETTER NOT STRAIGHTWASH BILLY AND TOMMY OR I WILL RIOT 😤

***FURTHER UPDATES***

So sit-com wise, it seems they were referencing Malcolm in the Middle as the twins broke the fourth wall and talked to the audience, like Malcolm did

However, the theme song has told the viewer to stop questioning the reality of Westview - which could be a little reference to Mystery Science Theatre 3000? - When Pietro first shows up in the title sequence, along with his name title card, the lyrics say “Though there may be no way of knowing who’s come to play” - Istg, I do not trust Pietro

Vision says to Wanda that he had to wear his Halloween costume because there were no other clothes in his closet, Wanda is trying to move the plot along and forcing Vision to play along

Evan Peters’ ‘Mom’ tattoo is shown, which is a tattoo he actually has in real life ! But could this stand for ‘Multiverse of Madness’ or some other red herring?

Pietro mentions to Wanda that if he had found ‘Shangri-La’ he wouldn’t want to leave either - Shangri-La is a real place on Earth-616 that was founded by a version of Vision

Tommy refers to Pietro’s speed as ‘kickass’ and then Wanda repeats that, saying ‘kickass’ again - Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Evan Peters (both versions of QuickSilver) were in Kick-Ass together

The ad for this episode was freaky af - the character on the beach who starved and decomposed could be a little nod to Indiana Jones, where a Nazi’s face melts in - and it could also be reference to Wanda being all alone and struggling to process her grief. The shark in the ad could also be Nightmare or Mephisto or just someone more powerful than Wanda offering her a new beginning with Vision or trapped her in some way - and is feeding off her magic? The flavour of the yoghurt is strawberry flavoured and strawberry’s are red on the outside and pink-ish on the inside - much like Wanda’s og costume and her magic being red 👀

Pietro and Wanda talk about their Sokovian accents at a point in the episode and how neither have them anymore. Wanda’s, as we know, has disappeared over the course of the MCU movies and Pietro’s just doesn’t exist - another nice little nod to Peter Maximoff from the fox X-Men films? Also, Pietro states that “I’m just trying to do my part, okay? Come to town unexpectedly, create tension with the brother-in-law, stir up trouble with the Rugrats (a 90’s cartoon 👀) and ultimately give you grief.” - in reference to the grief part, could Pietro be killed off again? Stir up trouble with the rugrats, being possible shards of the demon Mephisto’s soul, could this be Mephisto trying to influence them on a deeper level? It’s also many many common sitcom clichès

Pietro talks about how “I got shot like a chump on the street for no reason at all” - nice little nod to how Pietro was killed off unnecessarily and how we as a fandom still talk about how regular bullets shouldn’t have killed him

Herb is dressed as Frankenstein’s monster - Dr. Frankenstein created his monster and soon lost control over him, and he was created using electricity or lightning - much like Vision was created and brought to life by Thor using Mjolnïr to bring lightning down to his incubator thingy majig. Could this also be a reference to either Wanda slowly losing control over Westview or someone else controlling Wanda/controlling the citizens of Westview - we saw in episode 3 that Agnes told Herb to be quiet as it seemed he was about to spill the beans 👀

Vision goes towards Ellis avenue and is at a ‘crossroads’ of sorts - in folklore, crossroads are often used to speak to or summon the devil and are also used when an important character is making a decision that could change everything. He spots some citizens repeating certain actions and/or just standing completely still, could these be npc’s (non playable characters)? And now that the barrier of the Hex has spread, will those citizens now start to move? 👀 Also I know that all stop signs look like it, but the stop sign is also a red hexagon 🛑

Darcy scrolls through Hayward’s computer files and goes past a file called “Project C4-113” - it could reference Avengers Issue #113 in which Wanda and Vision both appear on the cover and she says she’s going to make the world pay for Vision’s death. There’s also another file called “Project M5-247” which could be a nod to Avengers Issue #247, which shows the origin of the Eternals and in the same vein, Scarlet Witch and Vision trying to help Captain Marvel. And when Darcy emails Hayward’s cataract plans, you can see the names of “James Alexander and James Gadd” - James Alexander is a visual effects producer on Wandavision and James Gadd works on post production at Marvel

Also: Agnes pulls as Mrs Hart and repeats the same phrase over and over again

After Wanda blasts Pietro, you can see on a fake grave stone the name of “Janell Sammelman”, Janell is a first assistant director on Wandavision

When Wanda moves Westview to save Vision, she turns S.W.O.R.D and it’s agents into clowns + a circus - I just love that the agents turned into clowns 😂 but there is a nice little plot line in the comics where Scarlet Witch, Quicksilver and Hawkeye join the circus - and this COULD be stretch, but earlier in the episode there is the number #22 which could be Avengers Issue #22, which is the Issue that they join the circus

As soon as Vision was brought back into Westview, he was healed - which means if he was to exit again, he probably wouldn’t survive 😭

The episode title is ‘All-New Halloween Spooktackular!” - which “All-New” is a designation that is often used on covers for comic books. And the first issue of the second The Vision and the Scarlet Witch series takes place on Halloween night - but the events in this comics didn’t influence this episode’s plot

Pietro points out that he has the “XY chromosome” - X for X-Men? Plus there’s the X gene 😂

He mentions “Uncle Peter to the rescue” - Peter is the name of Quicksilver from the Fox X-Men Franchise

Pietro and Tommy quote the movie Top Gun (1986) by saying “I fell the need, the need for speed”

Wanda almost seems hesitant to trust this version of Pietro (rightfully so, in my opinion) and is wary of him being around Tommy and Billy

Pietro says some very Mephisto/Nightmare-like things this episode - “Unleash hell, demon spawn!”, “The kids need a father figure”, “Damnit, if Westview isn’t charming as Hell...” - And if Pietro isn’t Mephisto/Nightmare, it HAS to be Agnes or her other half Ralph and Pietro is probably Ralph tbh...or could Pietro just be a scapegoat and Hayward is Ralph? 👀

The theatre in town, which is playing the Incredibles and The Parent Trap, is called the Coronet. There’s a classic poem called “The Coronet” written by Andrew MARVELL (Marvell, is also the true name of the first incarnation of Captain Marvel in the comics) and is about a guy who knows that the sins of mankind led to the death of Christ. He attempts to create a new crown for Christ’s head in an attempt to atone, but finds that there is sin in the crown as well, as the devil is within the crown and therefore he may achieve glory and success with his new creation 👀

Hayward’s confidential project “Cataract” included experimenting on Vision’s body, as was revealed by Darcy (my wife 💙 and Monica is also my wife 💚 and so is Wanda 💛, I just love women, you know? 😂). A cataract is a cloudy area in the lens of the eye that leads to a decrease in vision - is Hayward trying to weaponise Vision? Or maybe even trying to bring Ultron back? Or do what Tony wanted to do in the first place, and make a suit of armour that’s around the world? Either way, it’s for nefarious purposes

Who is Monica’s guy? Jimmy and Monica are off to meet him - could it be Reed Richards (Mr Fantastic)? Or could it be Victor Von Doom (Dr Doom)? Could it be Hank McCoy (Beast)? Or even Adam Brashear (Blue Marvel)? Or if it is a woman, could it be the Skrull daughter of Talos that Monica befriended at the end of Captain Marvel? Could it be Abigail Brand (A major character in recent S.W.O.R.D comics and an Alpha Flight Member)? Or even Toni Ho (Iron Patriot, and could she be introduced to help lay the ground work for my other queen, Riri Williams/Iron Heart?)? Or could it even be Sue Storm (Invisible Woman)?

In the background of the episode we see a number of children and adults dressed up as many different characters, which includes: Sub-Zero from Mortal Kombat, Jason Voorhees, with a sweater striped like Freddy Krueger’s and even a kid that looks dressed in an off-brand Charizard costume 😂 Pokèmon has always been popular, but saw an increase during the 90’s

Pietro and the kids are drinking “Kane Cola” which could be a reference to the 90’s drinks “Jolt Cola” or even “Surge” - it could also, with all the X-Men Easter eggs, be a reference to Garrison Kane, who was a member of Cable’s mercenary team “Six Pack” and is sometimes also known as ‘Weapon X’

The kid that Wanda mentions having a “skin thing” in the orphanage - could that be a reference to her Brotherhood of Evil Mutants co-worker Toad? Or maybe even Mystique? Maybe Kurt Wagner (Nightcrawler)?

One of the houses has a sign up that says ‘Macabre Mansion’ - another possible reference to House of M?

During a flashback, it’s shown that the twins are playing Dance Dance Revolution, which came out in 1999. Also this might be a stretch, but the boys have a dog plushie in their room the right - which is coloured red and black - could this be a reference to Dogpool? 😂

I love this show 🤣💙

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colorsofmyseason · 2 years

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Mirano’s Concise Guide to Arsenal Football Clown Club – Goalkeepers

A continuation from my previous post, now I will actually start discussing about those amazing footballers who were unlucky enough to join the circus are blessed with the honor of being a part of this amazing football club.

Since I wish to do this by position let's start by our goalkeepers a.k.a the sexiest role in football I'm sorry I don't make the rules but actually I do.

People say some heroes don't wear capes they wear goalkeeper gloves and this proves so true for these men since our defense is inconsistent af so they have to be ready to pull off the most bizarre saves in the history of football in order to keep this club on track.

Again, this will be COMPLETELY self-indulgent and may contain shipping materials so consider yourself warned.

First we have our current first choice man between the sticks Aaron Ramsdale (23). Got a lot of criticisms even before joining us thanks to his price tag and the fact that he got relegated twice previously, he sticks through and proves his capability and even kicked Bernd to the bench (I can't complain tbh), people accuse him for making camera saves but no he's just THAT good he makes every save looks camera-worthy

I mean, LOOK at this:

Even Peter Schmeichel approved and they're facing Leicester at that time lol.

This boy is also sunshine personified, he's so happy all the time and his smiles are so fckin BRIGHT they can cure my shittiest day

He positively BASKS at any rival fans' jeers at him, he even once collected 17 pounds that Leeds fans have thrown at him on the pitch, this man's shithousery knows no bound I can tell you, there's even a gif of him singing along "You're shit aaah" along the rival fans and still SMILING all the way I just can't fathom how but that's why we love him so bad

He also screams PASSION from the very first second he steps onto our pitch, he celebrates all our goals with his boyfriend fellow teammates and fans, probably even more than the scorers themselves lol

But just wait until one of his defenders costs him his precious clean sheets or forces him to make an unneeded save, an angry Aaron will come to kill them in their sleep

Moving on, now we have another blonde dimpled physical perfection in the name of Bernd Leno (29), another case of having No. 1 on your back doesn't automatically mean you're the first choice goalie since Aaron has successfully pushed him down the pedestal after three years at the club, this man's a bit unlucky for being born in the same generation as Manuel Neuer and Marc-Andre ter Stegen (by his own words, his parents stepped on the gas at the wrong time lol) so he's forever Germany's No. 3, but he's still very much an excellent goalie I can tell you

Look??? HE SAVED JORGINHO'S PENALTY EVERYONE NOT EVERY KEEPER CAN DO THAT!!!

When people say "some heroes don't wear capes they wear goalkeeper gloves" as mentioned earlier they're talking about Bernd, this man has slight suicidal streak I believe and won't think twice to dive headfirst into saves, as you can see yourself here, but then again one must have such tendencies to play for Arsenal at first place anyway so why not

His one habit is to puff his cheeks whenever he makes a save WHICH IS SO CUTE my chipmunk hubby I love you so much

Also notice his beautiful curls?? This man has naturally curly hair but he always gels it up so tightly during games/whenever he goes out in general and I honestly HATE it please baby just let your curls loose one time probably it can make your head more aerodynamic even lol I'm starting to speak nonsense

See the difference now?

Anyway this man doesn't like to play second fiddle so he's probably leaving soon so enjoy him while you can :(

Last but not least we have our third choice goalie Arthur Okonkwo (20), a Hale End graduate, has yet to make a senior debut for us but is highly rated in our U23 team, tallest in the squad I believe (he's 6 ft 5!!!) for now there's not much I can say about him but I'm sure he will be an important part of our squad in the future

So yeah, those are our heroes between the sticks, thank you for sticking with me throughout my rants I hope you enjoy this and gain some new knowledge regarding these beautiful men in red and white awful beanstalk goalie kits!

Stay tune for more and the next post will be the defenders :)

mirano’s concise guide to arsenal (part 2/?)

#aaron ramsdale #bernd leno #arthur okonkwo #goalkeepers union #goalkeepers #arsenal #arsenal fc #about arsenal #concise guide to arsenal #mirano's rant

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fnaf-sxc · 3 years

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What's was your thoughts on Melted Chocolate Bonnie? Would you be adding them to your AU, as like a sibling or something else to Chocolate & Easter Bonnie?

TL;DR: Personally im not a fan of it. Not really digging the direction the latest skins are taking tbh. I doodled something for Melted but it didnt convince me, I dont think I will do anything with them anytime soon

Long rant under the cut

What peak my interest about AR lore is that the animatronics were being built from a rental company to give their services. Not the original models (since they were destroyed) but rentals MADE for this, and the idea of add “skins” to the characters for certain holidays or creating their own events seem real and I loved that!

Of course there will be easter, halloween and chrismas themed skins, of course they would make an arcade, wasteland, summer and circus event with their own skins, it seems like something a company of this kind would do. Either a “this holiday is coming, we using this holiday to try to profit” or a “lets create our OWN holiday event”-- idk how to explain myself on that but like, yes please??????

And you know, they are built for thoses events, the creepy factor didnt came because they were designed to be creepy, but because it seem pausible and real and still dark and that add up to make it creepy. You know, what the original 2 FNaFs went for (the animatronics are normal and even cute, and put under a different light you can get scared over something nice),

So when we begin to get more over the top designs like the Haunted Woods and the Winter one... it was weird but okay?? But then we got a “Dark Valentine’s day” and I didnt like that--- that was crossing the line of “something a company would do to promote their products” to “lets make them creepy and dark”

So see a MELTED choco bonnie being used for Easter (A HOLIDAY THAT ALREADY HAD 2 PERFECT SKINS) and be treated as “oohhhhh there he comes nvn!!” all happy when is visible creepy is just....... no company would allow that

There is only ONE animatronic on the AR lore who can get away with being creepy on purpose and thats Springtrap, because he wasnt MEANT to be designed and the company is on a struggle of this animatronics going around, so they had to roll with it and try to cover it with skins also.

Youre putting Melted Choco Bonnie to the same level as AR Springtrap??????????????????????????????????????

So yeah, not really a fan. I did try to draw them??? but i didnt like their design and didnt find a way to add them to the AU. And im absolutely NOT changing Choco’s desing to be like Melted-- like i’ve seen some people upgrade their Frostbear to Blackice and downgrade their Choco to Melted, but I dont wan’t to do that, not meant for me.

I wont say I wont ever add them, because I said that about Clown Springtrap...... and now im making a detailed comic arc about him klgjklajksd

But as for now, I didnt like the skin, the implications for the lore and I have no ideas or interest to add them to the AU

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middleofnowhere92 · 3 years

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Ranking all ATLA Villains/Antagonists from worst to best (by someone who loves villains)

This post was inspired by this ask

Warning: I swear quite a bit in this post and I’m a dumbass, not an ATLA scholar, so take this with a grain of salt. Also I have no idea wtf my ranking criteria was. I assigned arbitrary and meaningless points like Dumbledore giving all the points to Gryffindor at the end of the year.

Iroh

I have a secret for you...Iroh is an antagonist.... Say it with me... Iroh is an antagonist. For the people in the back, IROH IS AN ANTAGONIST. He’s not particularly good at at it, but he belongs on this list. Primary reason being, his siege on Ba Sing Se, which was a major battle in the 100 year war and all the other things he did in the war to become a general. If he was good at being a villain, he would at least have the decency to conquer the city, but as Ozai points out, Iroh excels at tea and failure. When we see Iroh in Book 1, He’s a very chill antagonist for the same reason a lot of our other antagonists are (June, the Yuyan Archers, Combustion man etc)-they are helping a villain achieve their goal. In Iroh’s case, he does help Zuko in many ways ( like sneaking him onto Zhao’s ship) and these in turn help Zuko get closer to his goal of capturing Aang. I love Iroh as a character, but he’s not good at being an antagonist, which is why he is ranked the worst.

Circus Trainer

This man is straight up, evil. I like villains, but I do not like this man. He’s cruel and not in a fun way, which is why he’s near the bottom of the list. The whole point of being a villain is to be cool and do bad things, but he’s not even a little fun to watch. He’s the least interesting to look at...

Yon Rha

This man is a coward. Like how did he lead the Southern Raiders? He went soft when he got old. He was more savage back in the day. Like this man is a firebender, but he cowers from Zuko before Katara even pops up. He needs to grow a pair. Like Katara said man is pa-thet-ic.

The Rough Rhinos (ignoring the comics)

They get points for creating my favorite antagonist, Jet. But the first time we see these clowns in the show, the gang just rides away on Appa, easily avoiding them. And then the gang easily defeats them in their next run in. These clowns are good at destroying things, but not really fighting or pursuing others.

Ozai

I expected more from this man. He was hyped up for three seasons and I just didn’t feel like he was smart enough to be the bad guy for the whole ass show. The man clearly doesn’t think for himself or show up throughout the series doing menacing things. The final agni kai overshadowed Ozai and Aang’s showdown. That’s the theme, Azula outshines a grown man as the star villain of the show. He does get some points for his fashion and flair for the dramatic.

Mai's Uncle (Boiling Rock Warden)

This man, is a dumbass with the reflexes of a sloth. Suki overpowered him in 2 seconds flat. How is this grown man getting defeated by a little nugget like Suki? She was only holding his wrist. He could have just kicked her? Like you are a prison warden, look alive man! And he should have captured Zuko’s little ass and sent him right over to Ozai to get some street cred, but instead he just gets pissed cause Zuko broke up with Mai? First lesson in being a villain/antagonist- power over everything (including family). He does get points for ordering them to cut the line. That’s straight savage.

Xin Fu and Yu

Toph gets it right, these are two dunderheads. How did they not hear Toph bending metal? They react almost as slowly as the Boiling Rock Warden, letting Toph easily overtake them. They are two skilled benders and they didn’t even stand a chance.

General Fong

This man gets points for being a bat shit crazy. And I think he’s one of the first non fire nation antagonists we see in the show, so points for him. He’s an underrated antagonist. He does cool bending and his emotional manipulation to get Aang into the Avatar state is A+ villain work.

Azulon

Azulon gets villain points for keeping the war going. He didn’t fuck it up like Ozai. But Azulon gets his villainness handed to him on a platter, he didn’t really do much, besides maintain status quo. We do get the scene where Ozai asks for the throne. But I don’t think Azulon assumed Ozai was going to kill Zuko. Azulon was trying to make a point, that Ozai’s request was absurd, but he obviously didn’t know Ozai well enough...

Koh

Koh almost didn’t make the list. I don’t really consider him to be an antagonist. Aang came to him asking for information and Koh was trying to do what he does..steal faces. He was just vibing. I included him on this list, because he antagonized us (the viewers). Dude is easily the most terrifying part of the show.

Ghashiun

He muzzled Appa! He’s not ranked high on this list, because he didn’t know Appa was Aang’s so he wasn’t intentionally trying to fuck with the Avatar. I do like the sandbenders as a whole. They just run around causing chaos with their cool bending. This character, however, loses points, because when he is confronted about stealing Appa, he gets defensive and tries to lie. If you do something bad, at least have the balls to own up to it.

Wan Shi Tong

Gets points for his flair for the dramatic a la Ozai. I did like Wan Shi Tong’s logic around not giving the gaang information: “You think you're the first person to believe their war was justified?!” He had more brain cells than some of our other villains/antagonists, but was also dumb too? Sokka pretty easily outsmarted him. This Spirit has been alive forever, he shouldn’t be outsmarted by a child.

The Old Man

Oooof. I almost put him in the number one spot tbh. He did us and Haru so dirty. Like he could have died,but he turned in the person that saved him??? He gets points for shock value and pettiness. I personally think Jet should take him out...

June

June gets points for being a bad bitch. I like her vibe. She’ll do anything as long as you’re paying her the right price and I can respect that. She isn’t higher on the list, because she is executing someone else’s plan, not her own.

The Yuyan Archers

Speaking of bad bitches, the Yuyan Archers are so cool and I wish they got more screen time! We see very few antagonists that can keep up with Aang the way that this group does. They add a bit of spice and a different flavor to what we know about Fire Nation fighting styles, which I approve of. I hope we see more of them in future ATLA projects. They aren’t higher up, because they are still doing someone else’s bidding. If they had their own leader and their own agenda, that would be some cool shit.

Combustion Man

This man gets points for giving the gaang a lot of trouble. As viewers, we really worry about whether they will be able to defeat him. I like that he has a different style of bending, which in and of itself is terrifying. He still doesn’t make it up higher on the list, because he’s still doing someone else’s (Zuko’s) bidding.

Rig Warden

On second thought, I may have him ranked a little too high. But oh well, fuck it. He gets many many points for being voiced by George Takei. This man also gets points for having general villain swag. He is sassy and I am here for it. He’s highly effective at crushing the souls of the Earthbenders on the rig. Also, he does not stutter when Haru throws those rocks at him.Came at him full force which is what all the other himbos on this list should have been doing when these children played them! He outright told Katara he was gonna kill her “You’re one mistake away from dying where you stand.” Loses points for begging as he’s dragged off the rig. Go down with some dignity!

The Southern Raiders

So the Southern Raiders get ranked separately from Yon Rha, because he led them towards the end of their conquest. I think they started under Sozin’s reign. This group gets ranked fairly high, because they were very effective at their task. They came, they saw, they decimated-leaving the SWT defenseless and barely able to sustain itself.

Mai

I like Mai and wish I could rank her higher. I like her knives, they are very cool form of defense that was unique to her. I also love how she just immediately flung arrows at Aang, no hesitation. She does get style points, her aesthetic is everything. Her one liners are pretty funny, “You’re so colorful, you’re making me nauseous.” She lacks in her commitment. Anytime anything inconveniences her she’s just like eh, no thanks. Hardcore antagonists need to be have some dedication to their cause, which Mai does not. I feel like she would eventually run out of weapons in a longer battle, which would be a big issue for her.

Long Feng

Gets instant points for villain swag, creepy vibe and sass. This man kept news of a whole war from Ba Sing Se, even though the city was filled with refugees? Long Feng had his work cut out for him. He loses points, because he lets the children get away with too much. He should have locked down Aaang and co immediately, because they were trouble as soon as they rolled up. Also, he should have fought Azula. He let a fourteen year old take his whole career away. He was never even a player.

Sozin

Sozin gets a large amount of hypothetical points from being the one to start it all. He’s the one who initiated the 100 year war. He did not play around. He used that comet to its maximum potential. Also he has a dragon, which is fucking cool. He gets bad bitch points for leaving Roku on the exploding island. Like that’s a power move right there. He wiped out the air nomads and invaded the Southern Water Tribe, which is why his successors are ranked much lower on the list. They really didn’t do shit.

Hama

Gets points for being a waterbender, which is something cool that we hadn’t seen in a villain yet. She also gets points for executing her own deranged agenda. I would love to see her and Jet link up, cause that would have been chaos. She also gets heaps of points for inventing bloodbending. Many of the villains of this list can barely think and homegirl has big brain energy. She is cunning and quick, like when she utilizes Sokka and Aang to attack Katara. I like her general bruja (witch) vibes. She gets more points because she does not motherfucking stutter when Katara figures her out, she just starts bloodbending immediately. She really enjoys her power and I can’t blame her for it. She’s a baddie and she knows it. More points for Hama, because she gets Katara to carry on her legacy (whether she wants to or not) and goes off to jail with her dignity. She’s an all-star villain and I love to see it. She loses a few points, because her bloodbending is limited to the full moon, but she still has her waterbending which is terrifying enough...

Dai Li

Like the rig warden, I probably ranked these himbos too high, but I love them as henchmen. Their bending is amazing, they are sneaky and they can brainwash you? Like fuck me up man. They really are just a joy to watch and their betrayal of Long Feng is so unexpected. This group really creates the creepy/ominous aesthetic the creators were going for in Ba Sing Se. Don’t think their bending is good? They one upped Toph and almost had her, but Jet saved her at the last second.

Zhao

I feel like Zhao’s characterization is inconsistent (sometimes he has a bad temper, sometimes he doesn’t?) which makes him hard to rank, but let’s do it anyway. He gets points for being voiced by the guy that played Lucius Malfoy, like yaaas work that Slytherin aesthetic. Gets points for using the Yuyan Archers. Loses a lot of points in his fight with Aang, like that child was obviously baiting him. He has a lot of ambition and actually has to work to his rise to power, which he obviously relishes. He’s the perfect antagonist for Zuko. He accomplished his goal of frying the fish/moon and he actually captures Aang. I think the writers added in his hot temper later on, because they realized he was too competent and had to give him a flaw.

Zuko

Ohhh my morally confused prince, Where do we even start? Zuko gets a lot of points for his sheer determination. I would love to see an unhinged Zuko without Iroh. Zuko’s tenacity and unpredictability make him a fantastic antagonist. Iroh and Azula try to control Zuko, but they never really know what he’s gonna do next and neither do we as the viewers. He’s near the top of the list, because even with so many struggles he kept Aang on the run for two seasons. I like that he actually struggled to be good. He obviously loses points for joining the good guys, but we still love him.

Jet

Speaking of morally grey, cue up Jet’s theme music. He gets instant points for swag and cool swords. Like the Yuyan archers, Jet is one of the few antagonists we see that can keep up with Aang. Like Zuko, Jet’s dedication to his cause get him high on this list, because he will defeat the Fire Nation at any cause. The creators lose points for being cowards and killing him off. We saw plenty of other people (Sokka) get hit with similar rocks and not die. Jet is a fantastic antagonist with a backstory that the audience can sympathize with. He loses points for not being more versatile in his tactics. I’ve written more on this here.

Ty Lee

Katara is terrified of her, do I need to elaborate? Ty Lee by far has the scariest skill set on the show. It’s too easy for people to underestimate her. Katara and Suki make that mistake once and then never do it again. Like Toph, Ty Lee knows to wait for the right time to strike, making her highly effective at taking out our favorite benders and whole groups of benders (The Terra Team). Her betrayal of Azula is ICONIC and unexpected, but as always, Ty Lee knows just the right time to strike. I think Ty and Mai were perfectly capable of getting away at the Boiling Rock and I’m disappointed they were captured so easily.

Azula

Look down, you’re talking to your highness. Can’t see her? She’s the reason for your blindness.

To the surprise of absolutely no one, Azula is the baddest bitch in the game. PERIODT. She is ruthless, cunning and powerful. Her lightning bending is at a whole other level. She is the smartest person on this list. She takes Ba Sing Se from the inside out, utilizes the Da Li perfectly and has antagonized Zuko from the beginning. As far as I’m concerned, she was made to be Firelord.

#atla villains #atla unpopular opinion #unpopular opinion

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towerofgodscreamblogwink · 3 years

Text

me reading 2-3 but i’m pretty sure someone’s gonna commit war crimes, bam needs a break (i’m trying to conclude whether or not is he’s commiting war crimes) and khun wakes up and what the fu

honestly it’s also my fault for wtf is happening

alternatively, don’t read it

is this me or did bam just went “ugh” at someone.

👁👄👁

you mean furries

did bam just -

tbh i have mixed feelings bc bam already killed someone in s2 and haven’t paid much attention to it but rn manhwa tries to again make it a point or tries to make it a point *now* that bam can kill ppl so im like e

also i wonder if he’s commiting war crimes accordin to our international war law rn, cause he’s technically killing for the sake of war *before* official declaration

unless there already was decleration

and there’s also the thing that he was attacked

jesus christ help

same picture

"You're not just a clown, you're entire circus"

" A h s h i t "

Wow Siu is not screwing around with how pretty khun is

also no seriously some break im gonna get a heart attack

me: looks at khun bein pretty while ded

me: wow i sure hope this doesn’t awaken anything in me

:’) i’ll murder siu

Lmao that's cute

ya guys r fuckin assholes

why he keeps lyin - im sure if he said that it’s to help a friend davi would help?

me sad

i mean im glad but now im sad for devy

(ignore the fact i can’t remember his name correctly)

AHHHHHHHH

hello princess

my sleepin beauty

oh sweetie i saw that panel long ago and i was *screamin*, he wakes up after 2 years and right after he asks w h e r e ‘ s b a m , b a e

also i just noticed, does he already have a braid there? did someone was braiding his hair? i figured someone was changing his clothes since he had different shirt

what’s with this clothing

it’s the mix of sleeping gown and brothel mama style

“are you having nice rest”

“rest worthy *dying for* u know”

“dude.”

bby

YO IS SHIBISU PETTIN HIM

im sorry but look at the fucking quality khun is drawn with and then at shibisu

siu

don’t play favourites

pfff

👁👄👁 what

well he was in a coma, what did u expect

👁👄👁

like my balls

if i technically had em

that hmph tho

‘and nOOOOOoooOOOOooOOW, HoooLLYY SHIIIT!’

slurp

oh my fucking so his design jsut gave me chills for some reason and now I REALIZE IT’S BECAUSE HE LOOKS LIKE TAKOYAMA BOY FROM BNHA. THE BIRD BOY. OH NOONONONONONONONO.

i’ve read “we were hungry” and i was like understandable

Bam: *calmly* Louie.

Bam: Shut the fuck up

take 2

take 3

that kid: i’m sorry how the fuck does it relate to me in any way

bam: oh actually we just wanna reunite his...him...he...with his...father...or something... *calls hwaryun* was this what we were supposed to be doin? ye? not murdering people on the spot this time ya? k thx *hangs up* ya ya we cool

that kid: *trembling* what the fu

bam: listen kid you help me i give you free boze how about this

that kid: i’m not sure im legal yet-

bam: free boze it is!

tower of child abuse intensifies

that kid: i’d like to call my mom -

bam: HAHA!.. You have no mom

that kid:

bam s3 shouldn’t be legally allowed near children headcanon

#tower of child abuse #tog #tower of god #d dddddd dora #dddddddora #d d d d dd dora #ddddd dd ora #that kid #khun #bam #nesreads #nes reads

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damnnjoon · 5 years

Text

100 reasons to love Jeno

he’s allergic to cats but his family has 3 (bongsik, seol, lal) and he loves them dearly

he’s obsessed with cars like the little nerd he is

hates math dearly

he did enjoy both history and the sciences, though

even then, his favorite subject was phys ed, as expected

he can lie face down flat on the ground and raise himself up with bending his arms that is INSANE

can also get up onto just one foot without touching the ground

he cleans meticulously when he’s drunk

he also tries to get the other members to sleep early or sleep when they don’t want to,,, he essentially becomes dream parental figure no. 1

jenshow!!!! mc of the year!!!! king of mc-ing!!!!!!!

he’s grown up well throughout the years (from smrookies to chewing gum to now (boom)) but his smile has stayed exactly the same since when he was that kid from that commercial

speaking of: the milk commercial he was in

his and doyoung’s couple costume for 2018 halloween it was just so Valid

also him and renjun couples smurf costume it really went down in history i feel

i legally can’t go further without mentioning that one JSMR ep where he had the bathbombs and he saw the train bathbomb and went “choo choo!” that was so Good

he named his airpods “Jeno’s showerhead” boy WHAT

his trademark confusion noise (”huH?”)

the mole near his right eye…

...and the one on his left cheek

the fact that he’s awkward at aegyo in front of cameras but, according to jaemin, he has the most aegyo out of any of the dream members

he slaps his toner on so hard that it wakes renjun up every morning

can and will eat most things with mayo (ex. celery)

all of his contact names for the dreamies are puns based off of their names

current official hardest puncher of the dreamies

jaemin got champagne for his birthday and jeno finessed it within like… a minute

the sound he makes when he’s trying to hold his laughter in is EXQUISITE

that’s another thing: he laughs soooo easily it’s so good

his dancing is so mf powerful i feel like not enough people appreciate how talented jeno is at dancing

exact same height, shoe size, and joining day as jaemin, his ‘destined best friend’

lets his members play games in his room into the morning even though he has work at the show

calls himself “no jam” (not funny) even though he’s a whole circus

his automatic wince that he holds for a few seconds when anything is too loud during JSMR

high pitched noise of annoyance

exceedingly gentle and has a self-proclaimed weakness for cute things

cries when he’s angry

has gotten more and more confident as the eras pass by i am LIVING for it

says that he hopes to have another comeback with the original dream members someday (after they’ve all graduated… because SM is a Fuck and won’t make ot7 dream a fixed unit)

plays the guitar

composes songs! he’s so talented and musically inclined i am so proud of him

him, hyuck, jaemin, and jisung were forced to drop out of school to pursue being idols BUT before that he majored/focused in practical dance at SOPA (where his seatmate was jaemin!)

known for being bad at taking selfies (even though anything and everything with him is iconic, immediately,)

when filming for “go” hyuck fake kissed him and jeno started chasing him and that actually made it into the mv which is so funny

can eat half an apple in 2-3 bites

tied in arm wrestling with jaemin, who’s his lifting partner

has never gotten blackout drunk even though renhyuck allegedly have

really likes playing mobile games!!

likes puppies and old dogs just the same he’s so good with animals

he can play the violin!

he’s the baby of his family and that really shows sometimes

his handwriting is very aesthetically pleasing in both english and korean

he still has “the tastebuds of a child” and eats like garbage but works out super hard to maintain his body (i hope he’s being healthy!!!!)

his assigned character trait (ex. renjun’s is “pureness/innocence” because SM can’t their artists seem more than 1 dimensional, apparently) is “boring” and he just runs with it and it gets funnier and funnier whenever he or the others call him boring because they all know he’s a whole clown

listens to music loudly

his rapping improves with every song he’s really finding his flow!! it’s especially obvious in the we boom album in 119 and stronger imo

has a terrible sense of direction

he’s been wearing a lot of sleeveless tees onstage and offstage recently and you can tell he’s been working out which is rad because he’s mentioned how much he enjoys exercising so it’s good that he’s been doing what he loves!!

had a cameo on the drama a-teen... king of being an all around performer!!

resembles a samoyed (self-proclaimed) because of his eye-smile

loves cherry blossoms

he’s watched a lot of disney films but his favorite is the original Lion King

resembles (and loves!) donghae of suju

constantly compliments his members and has a tendency to compliment them even right after he clowns them

loves dark chocolate and can eat a lot of it

he really likes the sound of pencils against paper

his duality is insane he’ll go ham onstage and then be quieter and all smiles backstage like... true prince

his facial expressions are PEAK he is so expressive especially when he squawks at stuff

he genuinely liked studying (more or less) when he was a student and would like to go to university

has always wanted to and still wants to major in architecture!

that time he lit a candle and then accidentally blew it out directly after

when he shhhhed a lemon on JSMR

would love to go to Europe someday

his specialty is acting and I really hope to see actor!jeno some time in the future if he’s up for it

the way he says “oh my gosh!”

his soft vibrato when he sings where you can tell he’s not quite sure of his vocal capability (even though he should be because he’s iconic) but he still likes to sing

i know i’ve mentioned it but his dancing is so smooth and stylistic and powerful and tbh i feel it in my chest

boom shooting when he neglected to remind jaemin that he had his phone and pretended to take jaemin’s calls

that time renjun said live that jeno games til 4 am and jeno was like “don’t say that!!my mom might be watching”

boy can EAT

says he hates skinship but seems to enjoy initiating it

wears his watch everywhere because he’s the king of fashionable functionality

this (shoutout @iriiidescence )

i hate to focus on his physical attributes because I feel like he gets boxed in as just “pretty” way too often, but, with that being said, his hands are gorgeous and you can tell how much he respects the world around him by how gently and daintily he holds things

read and enjoyed Jonathan Livingston Seagull

is incredibly artistic but never talks about it

his eyes and gaze are visibly and obviously different on and off stage

he gets so flustered talking about his own duality it is the cutest thing

early days esp during mfal his smile was like :3 and it isn’t as pronounced nowadays but sometimes it’s still like that and that is very good

when dream got reflectors for their selfmade movie shoot thing (was it for the boy videos or something similar? I can’t remember) and he put it behind mark and was like “halo!” and hyuck almost beat his ass then and there

jaemin said “we’ve known each other for 7 years” and jeno was like “let’s stop meeting”

that nct life moment when him and jisung were “sparring” and jeno won but when he went to shake jisung’s hand he straight up pulled jisung’s mitten off but kept on shaking the empty mitten anyways to save face

the smrookies age vid where jaemin asks “am i cute?” in Thai and jeno straight up says “no”

ran DIRECTLY into a green screen during go mv filming and had the misfortune of it getting caught on camera

when jaemin said “i love you” and jeno (he was over the phone) panicked and stuttered out “no thanks”

when he sticks his tongue out in pics he is the CUTEST mofo

when he centered in black on black

when he was dressed up all hardcore in all black with a fake gun and still managed to look soft because of how his eyes shone with all the stars in the night sky

he always looks at his members like they each hung the moon

is always honest (even when it comes to shading SM 👌)

is always striving to become a better version of himself no matter what he is doing

spreads love in any way he knows how, whether it be verbally or through his actions or through the way his gaze lingers when reading comments or how focused he is on specific dance moves or how attentive he is to his friends... jeno always does what he can to brighten the world of those he loves and those who love him and he deserves the sun moon and stars because of this

#jeno #lee jeno #jeno lee #nct #nct dream #i love him #samoyed

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randomestfandoms-ocs · 3 years

Note

Drop the lyric by lyric breakdown for Evie + Mirrorball & This Is Me Trying

wellll if you insist lmao! Putting this below the cut because like... no one deserves to have to scroll past the entire thing if they don’t want to lmao

I’m going to start with Mirrorball bc it’s more the overall vibes and some lyrics whreas This Is My Trying is like, every other lyric oof!

I want you to know I'm a mirrorball I'll show you every version of yourself tonight

okay so like right off the bat, the idea of the mirrorball as a concept is very fitting to Evie — she exists in other people’s light and reflects everyone around her, especially early on. We see this a lot with Blair, where Evie finds comfort in just existing in Blair’s world and mirroring her (but being nicer lmao) because as long as she’s a reflection of Blair, she isn’t Evie, and that protects her in a lot of ways. She’s so terrified of not being enough and being hated and being judged that she finds comfort in that mask because if people don’t like her then it’s the mask that they don’t like, not Evie herself. This is very much tied into her mental health issues and part of her recovery process is letting people see who she is without the mask

I'll get you out on the floor Shimmering beautiful And when I break it's in a million pieces

as I’m sure you know, “when I break, it’s in a million pieces” could basically sum up her entire story. Evie manages to hold it together through a lot of really awful, traumatizing shit, but when she reaches her breaking point, she absolutely shatters. Part of why most of the people who know she’s been in the Ostroff Centre are so surprised is because basically no one realized that she’s actually been breaking for a long time.

Hush When no one is around, my dear You'll find me on my tallest tiptoes Spinning in my highest heels, love Shining just for you Hush I know they said the end is near But I'm still on my tallest tiptoes Spinning in my highest heels, love Shining just for you

Okay so this obviously makes me think of my boy Theo bc he’s an angel, but it fits the two of them really well because Theo has always seen past Evie’s mask. They’ve been best friends for their entire lives, and he’s really one of the few people that Evie trusts enough to be herself around! No matter what happens, when it’s just the two of them (or with Eric lmao, we love our codependent children) she can really just let down all of her walls and be Evie, and “evie who feels safe enough to just be evie” is exactly who Theo fell in love with

I want you to know I'm a mirrorball I can change everything about me to fit in

Oof the way this fits her just hurts me tbh! This goes back to what I was saying at the beginning, but Evie is an actress. Prior to her breakdown, she had always intended to become an actress. If there is one thing Evie can do, it’s pretend to be someone — anyone — else. Whether it’s to fit in, or to protect herself, or just because she doesn’t know how to be herself, changing herself based on her surroundings is something that has become so natural to her that she doesn’t even realize she does it.

You are not like the regulars The masquerade revelers Drunk as they watch my shattered edges glisten

We’re going back to Theo with this, but frankly this also very much fits with Eric, Blair, and Chuck, even Nate, and tbh even Serena. This is the Upper East Side; this is gossip girl. Watching people falling or being torn apart is everyone’s favourite form of entertainment, and the more public, the better. But Evie has this small group of people, her family, who don’t enjoy it. Ivy Week, as you know, is the perfect example of how even the fights between the NJBC get put on hold for the sake of protecting the younger siblings. Serena’s horror during the dinner with Georgina, Blair not sending the texts between Eric and Asher until Eric gives her the go-ahead, Chuck dropping everything whenever Evie is in trouble, Nate making a deal with Catherine to protect Theo, like... They’re all generally self-serving people who don’t hesitate to screw each other over, but all four of them will put aside any of their own issues and any fights they may be having in order to protect the babies — especially when it comes to protecting them from the rest of the UES society who would be all too happy to watch the golden children be torn apart

(already broke this one down lmao)

And they called off the circus Burned the disco down When they sent home the horses And the rodeo clowns

This one is more the overall vibe than the specific lyrics but you know how I feel about Evie in the housewarming party episode and honestly this just makes me think of how it ends with Serena still pissed at Lily and Bart and now also pissed at Evie for “giving in” and trying to act like a family (as Evie would say, “Chuck and Eric are my family, it’s the three of you who need to step up to the plate”), and she storms out which leads to a very abrupt end to the party, with Evie still sitting on the couch just kind of frozen because she was trying so fucking hard to hold everyone together and to make this work and it still feels like it wasn’t enough, like she wasn’t enough

I'm still on that tightrope I'm still trying everything to get you laughing at me

This takes on a bit of a double meaning for Evie because it fits really well with Evie wanting to be an actress and even during and after her breakdown, when she’s no longer sure if that’s what she wants, she still keeps going through the motions to work towards that goal because she really doesn’t know how else to be

But it also fits really well with Evie in her legal family (her bio family, the Van Der Basses, and the Van Der Humphreys) — Evie is always the one trying to put her own issues aside for the sake of her family. She keeps quiet about things that hurt or upset her because she doesn’t want to cause problems, she’s the one who just quietly accepts Lily’s relationships no matter how much she hates them because she knows that at the end of the day, Lily will always put her boyfriends first. Hell, when Lily and Rufus get closer, Evie tries to put her issues with Jenny behind her to make things easier for everyone else. Even in S3 when Jenny is tormenting her at school (Evie is the queen and everyone knows it, and she’s managed to put a stop to a lot of the drama, but Jenny is still trying to overthrow her and bring back all the shitty politics so that she can be on top), Evie just quietly takes it and refuses to tell anyone or retaliate until Jenny goes after Eric.

I'm still a believer but I don't know why I've never been a natural All I do is try, try, try

oof this is just... so Evie. For people like the NJBC, all the politics and scheming and everything comes naturally, but so does the effortlessly flawless illusion they put up. They turn seeming perfect into an art form, and the only time it takes any work is when they’re also trying to destroy each other. Evie has never felt like she has that. She doesn’t turn heads and part crowds just by walking into a room, she doesn’t have Serena’s magnetism or Blair’s ability to always get the last word, or Chuck’s “do not fuck with me” vibe, or Nate’s ability to convince people that he’s fine. She tries so hard and always feels like she comes up short, but she just keeps trying.

“I’m still a believer but I don’t know why” also fits really well with both the fact that Evie always tries to see the best in people, even when they’ve hurt her, and the fact that no matter how many horrible, traumatizing things have happened to her, Evie tries so desperately to hold onto the hope that it’ll eventually be okay

I'm still on that trapeze I'm still trying everything To keep you looking at me

I mean, this one honestly might be the most obvious? Her eating disorder. Going back to my last point, Evie doesn’t feel like she has the same natural magnetism or charisma as Serena and Blair. She doesn’t have the ability to make everyone fall in love with her with a smile (at least in her mind; Theo would beg to differ). She looks at her two older sisters who are just so stunning, at the way Blair always looks perfectly put together, at the way Serena can make being a mess look deliberate and desirable, and she feels like she always falls short in comparison, and she goes to dangerous lengths to try to achieve it.

Because I'm a mirrorball I'm a mirrorball I'll show you every version of yourself Tonight

And woo okay then onto This Is Me Trying, be prepared for some Evie angst!

I've been having a hard time adjusting I had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting

Okay so this sort of goes back to the last point I was making in Mirrorball, with how hard Evie tries to feel like she belongs in the UES, and more importantly how hard she tries to look like she belongs, and that while Evie was always the dreamer and the optimist, she’s starting to lose that as she gets older.

But quite frankly, this relates even more to Serena leaving. Before that, Evie was always the hopeful one — no matter how flakey Serena got, no matter how often she bailed on her siblings for Georgina and a party, Evie always held onto the hope that Serena still loved them and would still be their sister again, eventually. But then Serena left, without so much as a goodbye, and that dream shatters for Evie, and she gives up on that hope — and as you know, that plays a big role in her pre-canon breakdown, as does her inability to adjust to not having her sister around, however unreliable she might have been.

I didn't know if you'd care if I came back I have a lot of regrets about that

Keeping with that last point, this is actually more Serena’s POV about Evie — with how she left things with them, especially with Evie (who she fought with just before meeting Georgina the night of the wedding), she really isn’t sure if Evie would actually want her to come back, and she really does regret the way everything happens (especially as she realizes that she really doesn’t fit into Evie’s family anymore)

Pulled the car off the road to the lookout Could've followed my fears all the way down And maybe I don't quite know what to say But I'm here in your doorway

This is another bit that’s more about the vibes and images that it gives me than the specific vibe, but the first two lines here always give me the strong vibe of someone standing at the edge of a cliff or rooftop, trying to decide whether or not to jump, and that fits painfully well with Evie and how desperately she tried to hold on through everything that happened pre-canon, no matter how tempting it was to just give in and get away from it all.

I just wanted you to know That this is me trying I just wanted you to know That this is me trying

Going back to Mirrorball, part of the tragedy of Evie Van Der Woodsen is just how hard she tries, at everything. She tries to fit in, she tries to be perfect, she tries to be okay, she tries to just keep pushing through every single bad thing that’s happened to her, even as she’s falling apart behind her mask.

They told me all of my cages were mental So I got wasted like all my potential

Again, there are really two meanings to this when it comes to Evie. First is just... Evie has a hell of a lot of issues, clearly, but people tend to be very dismissive of them. Once upon a time, Evie used to actually reach out for help, only to get met with “poor little rich girl” and being brushed off because her life seemed so perfect, what could she have to be upset about it? Eventually Evie starts to believe it too, and her own belief that she has no ‘real’ reason to be upset becomes a big part in her reaching her breaking point.

But also... There was a point when Evie tried to talk to Lily. She tried to tell her about how not okay she was, and tried to ask Lily for help, but Lily just dismissed her because she wasn’t willing to take responsibility for her own role in Evie’s issues. It became so consistent for a short period that eventually Evie found herself wondering if maybe she really was overreacting, which in turn led to her not asking anyone else for help or telling anyone else what was wrong — and unfortunately for Evie, this was such a pervasive element of her ongoing breakdown that ultimately no one would be able to help her with the rest of it without first helping her with this, and no one could help because she never told anyone else because she became convinced that she really was just being overly dramatic and sensitive

And my words shoot to kill when I'm mad I have a lot of regrets about that

I know I was just telling you about this (hence, I assume, this ask lmao) but like, this is very Evie. Evie is the nice one. Evie chooses to be the nice one. She could easily destroy basically anyone with a text or two to Gossip Girl, but she actively chooses not to, because she doesn’t want to hurt anyone else the way she’s been hurt. But when Evie does snap, she’s merciless. She throws Serena leaving them back in her face when Serena starts talking about how Lily would leave without saying goodbye, she tells Lily that she’s even worse at being a mother than she is at being a wife, she tells Bart that if he wants them to act like a family then he should learn to act like a father, she tells Dan that his complaints about the UES would hold more weight if he were’t so desperate for the advantages that come with it... hell, she gets Chuck off the ledge of the roof by going straight for the kill and reminding him that he promised he wouldn’t leave her — and then by throwing in a “but then again, I’m used to people breaking their promises.” And afterwards, she always regrets the things she says. She feels like just because they’re hurting her doesn’t mean she needs to hurt them back.

But the best example I have of this is with Jenny. In general, Evie does tend to lash out more at Jenny than at most other people, because Jenny hurts her more than most, but more specifically this goes back to what I was saying in Mirrorball about season 3. Evie holds her tongue as Jenny torments her, because she doesn’t want to cause problems between everyone else. But then Jenny goes after Eric and Jonathan, and Evie reaches that breaking point — and, well, Evie did learn from the best. She’s well aware of Eric’s plan to steal her cotillion date, and she helps with that, but more importantly she stops Nate from stepping in. She waits until the announcer has been informed that Nate will be escorting her and then asks Nate to talk and tells him what’s been going on with Jenny — Nate is furious on her behalf but also doesn’t want to leave Jenny without an escort, at which point Evie pulls out her phone to show him that Eric had just given her an all-clear, that Jenny’s turn had already gone. Later Evie feels bad for humiliating Jenny like that, but as much as she regrets it, her bigger regret is that she knows that if she had a second chance, she would do the exact same thing.

I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere Fell behind all my classmates and I ended up here

Evie has always been the exception. No freshmen at the masquerade — except Evie. Ivy Week is for juniors — and Evie. Cotillion is for juniors — and Evie. So on, so forth. Because of their connections to the NJBC, and their parents, the twins and Theo have always been able to be ahead of the rest of their classmates. And most of the time Evie doesn’t mind it, she’d rather do all these things when she has Blair to help her. But then you get to things like the s3 cotillion and, even though her own was absolutely perfect, watching all of her classmates go through the preparation without her leaves her feeling hollow and disconnected.

(tbh, as far as I’ve been able to tell — though I might be wrong — you can be presented at more than one cotillion, so Evie might end up persuading Lily to let her register again, despite having done it two years ago, more for the connection to her peers than for the actual cotillion aspect)

Pourin' out my heart to a stranger But I didn't pour the whiskey

I mean this one feels like it might seem a bit obvious with regards to pouring her heart out to her therapist, but in all honesty, she never really did. What it really makes me think of is the scene in Poison Ivy, when Eric, Jenny, Theo, and Evie all talk, and Eric and Evie tell Jenny about the Ostroff Centre and everything. At this point, Jenny is still basically a stranger to them, but for some reason they both end up opening up to her all the same

And as for “but I didn’t pour the whiskey”, it’s actually a very important part of Evie’s story! Evie doesn’t drink anything harder than champagne — she’s seen Serena, she knows that Serena’s drinking is more of an addiction that she would ever admit, and she’s terrified of ending up like that, so she just doesn’t drink. Right up until Chuck disappears after Bart’s funeral — and when Eric is trying to explain to Chuck that they’re still his family and they still want/need him in their lives, the first thing he says to try to drive home his point is to tell Chuck that Evie has started drinking.

I just wanted you to know That this is me trying I just wanted you to know That this is me trying At least I'm trying

(already talked about this!)

And it's hard to be at a party When I feel like an open wound

This is honestly just an overall vibe for Evie! I don’t have a specific party in mind or anything (or I do but there are several — namely Jenny’s party, the opera, the housewarming, the masquerade, every thanksgiving, and like many more but I’ll leave it here for now) but Evie has a very hard time with being expected to go to these parties and be totally put together and play the perfect daughter even when she feels like she’s completely falling apart and just wants to curl up in bed for days

It's hard to be anywhere these days When all I want is you

This also applies to a few different situations, both romantic and platonic! The first scene it made me think of was Jenny’s party, when Evie is still heartbroken over the breakup and then Jenny outs her and it’s just rough. But it also makes me think of the White Party and how Evie is feeling guilty over her crush on Theo because like, ex boyfriends are off limits, and feeling weird and uncomfortable with Eric having brought Jenny despite the fact that things between Evie and Jenny haven’t gotten better since Jenny outed her. Honestly though it also really makes me think of the opera in s2 but in a platonic sense, because Chuck is there and all Evie wants is to be able to talk to Chuck and really have her brother back, but Chuck is still holding her at arm’s length because of how guilty he’s feeling at this point for everything that’s happened since Bart’s funeral

You're a flashback in a film reel On the one screen in my town

This one gave me more White Party vibes, specifically with the moment that Evie sees Jenny and then Jenny saying hi, which is the first thing she’s actually said to her since the Outing Incident, and how hard it is for Evie because god she’s still so hurt and Jenny’s never even tried to apologize but then at the same time with Jenny there and Theo and Eric also there it’s too easy for her to feel like it was the beginning of Freshman year, when all four of them were the best of friends and almost a functional version of the NJBC and as much as Evie is still hurt and pissed she also just really misses the way things used to be, back even before any dating started within the group.

And I just wanted you to know That this is me trying (Maybe I don't quite know what to say) I just wanted you to know That this is me trying At least I'm trying

(already talked about this!)

And anyways, there are my lyric breakdowns for Evie Van Der Woodsen, now I’m feeling all sad about her again

#lizziesxltzmxn #ask #answered #evie van der woodsen #about evie

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sunslip · 4 years

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If You’re Scared By The Stranger hmu, A Meta

The Stranger never really clicked for me in the same way the other fears do. Death and The Dark? some scary shit. The Flesh and Corruption? I vibe. Spiral or Eye? ok I get it I guess. But The Stranger has never really caught on in my brain. So I wrote some stuff.

Maybe it’s the fact that the Stranger is harder to push down into a single category - It is better defined by what it isn't. It isn't Sasha, or Graham, or that woman's mother. It isn't human, but it's nearly human. What can we actually say it is a fear of? It has a lot of variously connected things in its domain, and I was thinking about a few of the big ones.

Fear of clowns wasn't really mainstream until Steven King's IT came out*. The miniseries, with Tim Curry. Maybe people weren't fans of clowns before but they weren't inherently frightening until Pennywise came into public consciousness (which professional clowns have written about) and the monster clown trope was born. Which tbh I love, I don't find clowns scary at all, so I see a monster clown and my first reaction is pretty much "oh, neat!". This is a learned fear for humans, it's not something inherent with survival value, like being afraid of heights and poisonous spiders and disease would be. I love learned fears - catch me talking about fear of alien abductions as a learned fear on another post some time.

This is distinct from the fear of what is now called the uncanny valley, things that look human but aren't. This is probably closer to the core brief of the Stranger, but in terms of fear it comes from a very different place. The fear of the sort-of-human-looking-thing has evolutionary weight. It allegedly comes from the fear of corpses (as distinct from the fear of dying - another evolutionary advantage!) as staying away from corpses means that the species is less likely to die of gross corpse diseases or eat rotten meat. People say that we dislike clowns because of their painted faces, which are human but distorted and invoke the uncanny valley idea but I don't believe this. if it were true, everyone would be afraid of clowns, and have been afraid of them the whole time. If it was linked to a survival trait, it would be more or less constant across geography and time, instead of popping up around the 80s. Anyway. The uncanny valley is more or less a constant fear for everyone, like a fear of heights, everyone experiences this to some degree. Clowns is not.

I do want to talk about fear of circuses though. A circus coming to town was a point of fear historically speaking, even before clowns were. This is based on xenophobia (all these new weird folk coming into town, taking our children away, they're not like us etc etc) and fear of and prejudice against Irish travellers/Romani people. Xenophobia seems to be a big part of most of the fears - it was a cw in both the recent eps with the corruption and the slaughter and shows up in other episodes - and which is probably linked to an evolutionary drives to keep the in-group happy, which is why it shows up in a lot of places, across both geography and time.

Taxidermy, dolls and mannequins are also linked to the Stranger - mannequins I think fall pretty strongly into uncanny valley territory, and anyone who has done a spooked double take in a department store can agree. Taxidermy is freaky for similar reasons, we as a species have the drive to Not Fuck With Corpses but it doesn't really apply to animals so its kind of in the middle. Fear of dolls/ventriloquism dummies I have never understood. Like theyre little, what are they gonna do? So I'm not going to say anything about that.

One of the weirder things assosciated with the Stranger is creativity. Nikola and the rest of the ritualists dance and sing. They sew their own clothes**. Music, they play the calliope organ. They make taxidermy animals, dolls, wax sculptures***, and automatons. Their zone in the postapocalyptic hellscape manifests as a poem! All creepy in concept, but definitely based in creativity, much more so than the other powers. The only other one that makes art that I can think of is the trash art in the amazon built in one of the Extiction episodes. But why? Is it that creativity is fundamentally human and seeing it co-opted by monsters makes the monsters seem more threatening, or real, or like us? Or is is just a coincidence that Nikola made all her props and costumes by hand, is it just her?

Do these things all push the same button despite being unrelated - like bugs and disease both being part of Corruption? If you're scared of the Stranger hmu and tell me why.

*It is possible that John Wayne Gacy may have also contributed to fear of clowns in the late 70s by murdering lots of children, but the fact he was also a birthday clown was unrelated to his crimes.

**out of human skin, admittedly

***out of people again

#tma #the magnus archives #the stranger #nikola orsinov #mag 165

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bigskydreaming · 5 years

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Batman AU where a pissed off Dick Grayson, after being fired from Robin and kicked out by Bruce, doesn’t go back to the circus when he was off finding himself. Before he became Nightwing. He meant to, even made it all the way to Europe on his way to their latest stop, but in London he got....distracted, when he ran into one John Constantine.

Now, back at this point in canon, Constantine was probably in his mid-twenties at most. I’ve always pictured him mid to late thirties in current comic canon, he’s one of those guys who comes off as older than he is, b/c like, lbr, dude lives ROUGH, lol. But me being me, like, I’m not looking to hook nineteen year old Dick Grayson up with a mid-twenties staggering disaster in whiskey-soaked human form. However, that does not mean that Dick, recently feeling disillusioned about numerous things as well as lost and directionless, two things that define John in a lot of his decades, let alone twenties -

Like, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t THINK about it, and perhaps romanticize the idea of him and John being kindred spirits. As well as maybe a little attracted to Constantine’s patented performative way of living, aka “watch how I windmill through life, giving no fucks whilst taking whatever latest misfortune befalls me in an unaffected and devilishly snarky stride, because of the thing about the no fucks, see, that’s the connection there.”

And okay, if we’re being totally honest here, its not like it just COMPLETELY didn’t occur to Dick that he was coming up with reasons to justify sticking around and hanging out and also crushing on one of the people MOST likely to tick his dad off. I mean, let’s face it, John is like, the combination of three things Bruce has zero patience for and avoids or outright disdains whenever possible:

1) Magic, ugh, unreliable, illogical. (Bruce’s super-objective POV on the subject) - Look. It makes no sense. Follows no logical rules. Every usage of it is a breakdown of the normal universe and the ordered mechanism of The Way Things Are Supposed to Work, the things Batman relies on, needs in order to be him, the Great Detective, the guy who understands how everything works and that’s how he stays one step ahead of everyone else.

In a word, magic and all its works are RUDE and they like....annoy him just on principle.

2) Eternally late and relentlessly slovenly (not everyone has a live-in BUTLER Bruce, jeez)

and

3) ...John Constantine. (Let’s be real. This one just is what it is. There’s not a whole lot of getting around it. Its hard for Dick at age 19 to pretend buddying up with John isn’t guaranteed to make Bruce grind his teeth, given that its hard for anyone at any age to pretend that while Bruce almost certainly respects the things John has accomplished at various times....being in the same zip code as him is something he tries to avoid. Their personalities are not super compatible).

So, its a tiny bit possible the Great Divergence of this AU from canon.... comes down to one accidental team-up with one of Batman’s Top Ten Favorite People, No Seriously....and then Dick kinda leaning into being a bit of a petty shit here. Look, its not his finest hour, but Bruce started it, and also, like whatever. Alexa, play ‘Teenage Wasteland’ but y’know, all...SUPER LOUD and ANGSTILY.

Ahem. Anyway.

So even though Constantine rather famously likes neither people nor drama, and Dick is both those things.....Dick is also always effortlessly charming and makes friends wherever he goes. In the end, it should come as no surprise to anyone but Constantine that he is no more Immune to Dick’s innate Likeability Quotient than most of the rest of humanity.

And for a couple of weeks they kinda just hang out, get into random mishaps with magical gargoyles and ensorcelled ravens around the Tower of London and also one specific clash with a demonically possessed umbrella that turned anyone who held it into like, Mary Poppins, but also, y’know, EVIL - look it was this whole thing, don’t ask, Constantine still doesn’t like to talk about it. He even offered to show Dick how to do a minor cantrip if his mischief minded companion would agree to keep his mouth shut on the subject from now until the end of eternity.

Dick had to hem and haw over that one for a bit, but ultimately his innate curiosity won out over his fondness for telling a rousing but also hilarious tale. It was a very narrow margin, but that was all that was needed to have Dick’s foot take its very first step along a very different road in this universe.

See, Constantine’s not really expecting much to happen even as he walks Dick through the steps of the simple spell. Magic’s as unpredictable about who it’ll roll over and play tricks for as it is in how it operates and functions and like...basically accomplishes all the many varied feats that make Bruce develop spontaneous frustration migraines, because that’s not how reality works, none of this has anything to do with how reality WORKS, what happened to the RULES, dammit!

And sure, there’s all sorts of different kinds of magic, and all kinds of different lines various magic practitioners sort into....some are born into it, like the Zataras, and Constantine himself actually, though in a very different way from the former....others end up developing a knack for it after significant encounters with arcane or occult beings, forces, artifacts or the like, as though their exposure to such a focused concentration of it resulted in a kind of charge rubbing off on them, just enough to make them able to attract and gather and channel magical forces from then on themselves. Others are chosen to it, and some just have no clue why spells will work for them but not ten random pedestrians they stop on the street and use as a rather strange sample group.

But bottom line is magic isn’t just about practice and skill, you tend to either have a knack for it or you don’t, and more people don’t than do, so John’s pretty much expecting to fulfill his end of their little gentleman’s agreement and then watch Dick duplicate everything he did exactly, with zero result.

Except turns out, Dick Grayson DOES have a knack for magic, same as he has a knack for well, everything. The guy was crime fighting and kicking bad guy ass in middle school. Forget James Bond and Captain Kirk, forget even Batman himself, ROBIN is the original and ultimate Gary Stu. Of fucking course Dick would be good at magic if he ever tried it. There’s a fairly large school of thought in this universe that posits that the force they call magic is an almost living entity in its own way, perhaps even sentient. Most of the magicians and wizards and sorcerers in that school of thinking kinda all quietly nurse the opinion that magic just, like....likes Dick Grayson, and he just charmed it with his first attempt at that simple spell and had it wrapped around his finger by the time he said Abra Kadabra.

(Because of fucking COURSE John picked a spell he could end with Abra Kadabra, have you met the man? He’s the most dramatic of them all, why do you think he hates both people and drama so much??? He’s the people and the drama!)

So there we have one lost and directionless Dick Grayson, feeling like he’s lost his footing and all his old plans and projected paths don’t really fit him anymore, or at least not well enough to help him feel like he’s headed somewhere, doing something.

Buuuuuut, then there’s that petty teenage side of him again, the one that goes fuck Batman, and also I’m right to say so.....and at least that IS a direction to focus on, even if not the most noble one....so the same brain cells that linked up and logic’d him around to the conclusion that ‘Bruce will never think to look for me with John Constantine of all people, and LOL how much would he hate that’....like, big fans of the positive reception their prior performance had received, those same brain cells leap back into action with zeal and zest and steer him to the not all that distant conclusion:

“LOL, how much would Bruce hate it if I ended up being this like, super talented magician, with expertise he knows nothing about? Could you imagine?”

Turns out Dick could, and did, and so much like that initial inch in this direction, is the true basis of him following up on that and becoming a renowned sorcerous superhero in this universe the fateful last words “Screw you dad, you’re not the boss of me and I’ll do what I want!”

I mean. Yeah. That’s pretty much exactly how it began. Yup. Oops.

But the thing is, that’s just how it starts. A random string of chance encounters and events that capture Dick’s attention and interest at a time and a place in his life where he was looking for literally anything to do just that....but once it HAD his attention and interest, everything changed. It was no longer about thinking ‘hey this will really tick Bruce off,’ because Dick’s capable of that train of thought and gut/impulsive decision making, sure, but he’s not about to commit his entire LIFE to that just to flip Bruce the proverbial middle finger.

It only continues, he only keeps going and furthering his magical studies because he genuinely comes to love it for the sheer versatility, the unpredictability of it, the way holding reality in one hand and magical forces in the other is like walking a tight rope with no safety net, and sure its not the same thing as flying, but on that note, did you know there are spells that can literally make you fly?

Dick does, now, and he knows like, seventeen different ones.

And so Dick throws himself into studying magic the same way he throws himself into everything. He’s never done anything half-assed in his life. He’s physically allergic to the very idea of it. When he does a thing, he fucking COMMITS, and becomes the best he possibly can at it....which ultimately almost always puts him in the one percentile of that thing.

He learns everything he can from Constantine, or at least as much as Constantine’s willing to teach him. Eventually their paths diverge, not because of any bad blood, but just because Dick isn’t interested in the same specialties as Constantine. So then he moves on. Travels the world, similar to what Bruce did when he was his age, training to become Batman. But Dick trains with magicians, wizards, alchemists. Madame Xanadu. Sebastian Faust. Raven. Even charms freaking Circe into teaching him an enchantment or two, because lbr, a mystically inclined Dick Grayson would inevitably intrigue the more infamous mystics of the DC universe in the same way a combat-focused Dick Grayson intrigues Deathstroke and assorted others.

Everyone except for Zatanna and Jason Blood, the magicians Bruce actually respects and relies on, and who Dick is sure would report back to Bruce about him, and he’s still ticked. Plus, Zatanna’s type of magic is innate, not really something that can be taught, and Blood’s stems from his sharing his body with a demon and Dick’s not really looking for a roommate right now.

Eventually, Dick is satisfied enough with his skills and knowledge to return to the Titans. He adopts the name Nightwing, same as in canon and for the same reasons. He’s still the same man, same leader, same fighter with all the skills he already had....just now with the added repertoire of someone who’s branched off in an unlikely direction.

Hey, Bruce did want him to go to college and learn something new. Not Dick’s fault his particular field of study isn’t Bruce-approved. (Okay, its entirely Dick’s fault, since that was after all the point, but eh. Oh well).

Nightwing’s still an acrobat and hand-to-hand fighter. He’s invested too much time, effort, himself into those skills to just give them up. He’s an adrenaline junkie, thrives on motion, activity, the rush of going head to head with someone who can really push him, challenge him. His magic is incorporated into his fighting. He constructs who he becomes as magician around the foundation already in place due to who he is as an acrobat, detective and hand to hand combatant. His magic is an added skill, not a replacement for his previous skillsets.

So he has alchemical potions on his utility belt, amid his ordinary smoke bombs and gas pellets. Tools and spells of divination and scrying for when a trail goes cold and can’t be tracked further by ordinary means. But now the Titans have another mystical expert to turn to for magical related missions, not just Raven. Their specialties are entirely different, but they’ve worked together since Raven first came to this plane, and they still complement each other well.

Of course, this changes things in other ways too. Dick’s new focus takes him further away from his time with Batman than even in canon. He’s still traveling and training for most of the time Jason is Robin and never even meets him before his death. Of course he kept tabs on Gotham no matter where he was. He absolutely knows about the adoption, about a second Robin. And about Jason’s eventual death. But he’s still somewhere places unknown in the aftermath, not easily tracked down by Tim, who sets out to help Bruce on his own, wearing down Bruce’s resistance to him being Robin between just his and Alfred’s efforts. Dick remains largely estranged from the Batfamily as Cass is adopted, Steph takes her turn as Robin, etc.

And then Jason comes back from the dead.

But again, things play out differently here. This Jason is never found by Talia and the League, never dumped into a Lazarus Pit. Instead, Leslie Thompkins opens up her clinic one day to find a catatonic Jason in a bed inside, not long after he’s resurrected. He recovers as mysteriously as he returned, helped along by being in familiar environs, surrounded by loved ones as he’s of course immediately returned to the Manor and attended on by Bruce, Alfred, Babs, Tim and Cass. So he has less resentment for Tim, for being replaced. Its harder to deny Bruce’s love for him when he has Bruce by his bedside, day after day, watching and waiting throughout his recovery. He never suffers from Pit madness. Is never influenced by League ideology. Never trains with monsters and murderers awful enough he wants to kill them himself after he’s done training with them.

And its hard to resent Bruce for not avenging him and killing the Joker, when no one’s seen the Joker since almost right after Jason’s death. The clown never returns to Gotham from Ethiopia, not as far as anyone can tell. By the time Bruce set out to hunt him down, after Jason’s funeral, the trail had gone entirely cold. Bruce hunted for him, sure, but Jason can’t be too mad about Bruce giving up before finding him. The Joker’s never been one to lay low. When even just a few months had passed without even a hint of the villain or his future plans, it was hard to imagine he was still alive - he never lacked for enemies, after all. Not unreasonable that someone else had gotten to him first.

Plus, of course, its hard to compare yourself to the ‘golden boy’ and find yourself coming up short, viewing yourself as less loved than Dick Grayson, when said golden boy still remains estranged. He’s the prodigal son in this reality, with Bruce’s anger towards his eldest for never coming back to the Manor, not even after Jason’s death - its obvious to everyone, even Jason. Tim doesn’t have the close, brotherly bond with Dick that he does in canon, and with less resentment from Jason for replacing him, its easier for the two middle sons of Batman to bond after Jason’s return.

Jason returns to crime fighting, probably still takes up the name the Red Hood - his sense of humor and irony had nothing to do with his death or the specifics of his return. He and Bruce still clash. They have their ideological differences, Jason’s harsher than Bruce would prefer. But this Jason has reasons not to force an all-out divide between he and his father, sticks to the line (even if reluctantly), not because he believes differently - he still thinks he’s right about Bruce’s way being flawed and will always argue so - but because he has reasons to stay. Things he actually feels he’ll lose if he pushes things too much, actually leaves the family. Because he has a family, he has no doubts about that here. Tim and Cass and Alfred and even Bruce. He’d miss them, if he lost them. So he makes sure he doesn’t.

And then, a couple years after his return, Jason starts feeling hunted by something. Some presence, some force constantly shadowing him, stalking him. Something supernatural. Otherworldly. In time, there’s no denying it. He’s actually attacked by some unseen, invisible presence, like some kind of monstrous beast that’s hunting him and only him.

Its hard to come to any conclusion other than that it has something to do with his resurrection. Nobody knows how that happened after all. Not even Jason. But there was definitely nothing natural about it, so with something unnatural hunting him, almost as if he’s ‘the one that got away’ or some kind of affront to the natural order of things, the Batfamily adds 2 + 2 and gets ugh, fuck, we need to call a magician for help, don’t we?

Bruce calls in Zatanna and Jason Blood first, of course. But this is well outside Zatanna’s area of expertise, she has no insight to offer. Blood’s a little bit more help. He’s at least able to confirm that the force is otherworldly, not native to this plane, and might very well have something to do with Jason’s time....not on this plane. And he is able to affirm that there’s nothing demonic about the presence, no whiff of Hell surrounding either it or Jason.

Finally, reluctantly, Bruce calls in John Constantine, at Blood’s suggestion. His number isn’t so much the last one in Bruce’s old-fashioned rolodex so much as its buried somewhere on the Manor grounds, locked in a puzzle box that affords Bruce countless opportunities to turn back or try something else before he finally gets it open and pulls out the card with his contact info and the header: IF YOU ABSOLUTELY MUST USE IN CASE OF EMERGENCY WITH ALL OTHER CONCEIVABLE OPTIONS HAVING PREVIOUSLY BEEN EXHAUSTED PRIOR TO THIS - HERE I GUESS.

Okay, maaaaaaaaybe I’m embellishing a little bit on that one there. But whatever.

And its not like Constantine is the actual last of the last he contacts here. For instance, even more than he’d like to not have to bring in John, he’d really rather not call Raven either, though he knows of her as well of course.

In this reality, the Titans remain more distant from the Justice League and other heroes. They took Dick’s side when Bruce kicked him out, closing ranks, not to mention Roy’s falling out with Ollie resulting in a similar sentiment from them. And Dick and Roy’s diverged paths here similarly result in them paralleling each other in not reconciling with their fathers - they reaffirm to each other that whatever ‘their part’ in their disputes were, they deserved better than how Bruce and Ollie handled those situations, and they’re not going to let each other settle for being afforded less than the respect and care they deserve.

So to be clear, its not that even after a couple years, Dick is still actively avoiding Bruce - Bruce’s failure to extend the hand first, make the first attempt at reconciliation and conveying that he still wants and needs Dick in his life, his family...that’s still the underlying issue, and the real change in family dynamics comes from Dick not caving and returning to a similar status quo to what he left, without Bruce ever actually addressing his own behavior and mistakes in driving Dick away without making any real attempt to get him to stay, or to follow him, or to ask him to come home.

As for the rest of the Titans, Wally still became the Flash here when Barry died, but he felt no real need to ‘move up’ to the Justice League, and with all of the rest of the original Titans remaining a cohesive family unit here, he chose to stay with them when not patrolling Central City. And when Kyle Rayner became the last Green Lantern and joined the Titans as in canon, the team was closer, more family than the line-up he was briefly a part of in canon, and so he remained with them as well.

So the end result is in this universe, for the end of their teens and the early years of their twenties, the Titans go their own way, and they and the JLA keep to their respective ‘corners’ as it were. Meanwhile Tim’s generation remains known as Young Justice.

So back to the Batfam’s problem and Jason’s unknown pursuer. Constantine’s not much more help than Jason Blood was. After all, demons are his specialty too, just in different ways than they are Jason Blood’s. and the other magic he knows isn’t of a sort they need here either.

He is however, able to offer one bit of advice - what they need, John says, is a magician who specializes in the otherworldly, not just the netherworlds. There are more things in Heaven and Hell than well...just Heaven and Hell. Plenty of other worlds, plenty of other dimensions....the kinds of places something like this creature could have come from. What they need is a planewalker. And luckily for them, Constantine just so happens to know the name of a planewalker who could help them.

Dick Grayson.

And of course the estranged eldest still comes when he’s called, because its never that he didn’t care, its just that he wanted, needed to be called. Even when tragedy struck the family, it wasn’t that he didn’t want to return and be a comfort to them, its just that he wasn’t sure his presence would be a comfort.

(Though it takes numerous arguments while working on the mystery of Jason’s hunter, like, before this gets even brought up, let alone clarified. All parties involved are of course world-class experts at the cold shoulder, not to mention avoidance tactics and evasive maneuvers of all types.)

And as Jason and his other siblings get to know their mysterious oldest brother, the much alluded to but rarely spoken of first son, the Zitka in the room, the shadow they’ve all always been aware of but never known much about - other than that he had a definite Talent with a capital T for getting under their father’s skin, and while they might be closer with Bruce in this reality, Bruce is still Bruce and that’s still a Talent they all can respect and appreciate - well.

It would be a mistake, Jason realizes, to assume that just because Dick left, that meant that he didn’t keep informed on what he left behind. He has many many means at his disposal now, for getting information when he wants it.

And it would be a mistake to assume that just because they didn’t see him care, that actually meant that Dick didn’t care. He didn’t have to actually meet Jason to feel at least a connection to the second son to be raised by the same father, the second person to wear his colors, bear his mantle, fight at Bruce’s side. He didn’t even have to know him, to grieve that now he’d never get the chance, when Jason died. To be outraged at the Joker, on his behalf.

And its not like Dick didn’t have plenty of other reasons to hate the Joker as well - he was the reason he was fired, the reason he and Bruce were estranged, the catalyst of so much of his family’s misfortune.

And no one did ever find a trace of the Joker after Ethiopia.

Almost like he’d dropped off the face of the Earth.

Vanished from it entirely.

Of course, while Dick Grayson might be estranged from his father, he still abides by the code Bruce instilled in him at an early age. He doesn’t kill.

But there are worse things than death, some might say.

Especially for a man like a Joker, because he does have one thing he truly cares about: landing a punchline. Its why everyone assumes he was killed by some other enemy after Ethiopia....the Joker can never go long without making a reappearance. He needs an audience too badly to ever stay hidden for long.

After all, what is a joke, if there’s no one to hear it?

And then as well, the family never did figure out how Jason ended up in Leslie’s clinic, after he crawled out of his grave.

How someone found him so quickly, and knew the best place to take him. However Jason ended up resurrected, it surely had to involve considerable power of some sort, supernatural energies that surely had to attract some attention....

at least from someone attuned to the supernatural, who knew how to see such things....

and had reason to occasionally visit the Wayne family cemetery.

Yes, even in this vastly different universe, there’s still a way, still time to reunite a family even this fractured. When you’re a planewalker like Dick Grayson, there’s no road beyond your reach, its just a matter of finding the right one.

And just because it takes time to find the road that finally leads home....that doesn’t mean its not out there.

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