Small Child’s Thoughts on “The Muster of Rohan”
Why does Rohan have mustard? (Nope, not mustard. Muster. “An act of assembly.”) Oh. Okay. That’s probably better. I don’t like mustard.
Oh, it’s Pippin again. I thought it would be Merry or Éomer. (Are you upset?) No, only confused feeling. (Well, Merry will be back soon.) Sometimes I think maybe this book has too many people, you know?
What does that mean?! “A skyless world?” I do not like that AT ALL. No one should write that. There is always sky.
Merry just ran out of words. I run out of words a lot. (You’re having a lot of words to say tonight.) It’s because the ocean didn’t let me say any words when I was swimming in it.
Oh, I forgot about Frodo and Sam too. Those guys are probably just dead, I guess. (Small Child! Don’t you remember? Frodo got captured by orcs and Sam was trying to rescue him!) Well, can we be realistic? Sam is a small guy and there’s lots of orcs, Mom. (Small Child, you are very funny.) No, I am serious. (That makes you even funnier!) ….I think you should stop laughing and start reading. Please.
If the good guys had trains, I bet they could beat Sauron. (If you don’t stop talking about trains, I’m not reading anymore.) I just… I just think trains would be helpful for everyone.
Hey mom, is J.R.R. alive still? (He is not.) That’s a major bummer. (I agree.) If he were alive, you know what I would do maybe? I would write him a story that was only talking about grass and hills and send it to him so he would know it is really boring to read. (Kiddo, you’re killing me.) No, because you’re still laughing.
Probably if Merry is wondering he should just ask some grownups so he can know what’s going on.
Good job, Merry! That was a really good way to ask that question. Proud of you, bud.
Um, the dead don’t call anyone. And I think that if they did you should maybe not listen.
Yeah, Boromir is dead. (Yes, thank you for that.) You’re welcome!
Uh oh, I think Merry is not going to like this. He said he did not want to stay there. Ah, see, I just knew he would be mad.
People’s hearts tell them lots of things in this story. (Does you heart ever tell you things?) Sometimes it tells me I want to go rail fanning with my dad.
If that guy is searching for death he should probably go the way Aragorn did.
61 notes
·
View notes